Mark Monday

TBT:  Yeah, me again. I mentioned Ayla and Marley getting older yesterday, and I didn't want to leave it on such a negative note.  It is hard to speak about our cats dying and I generally avoid it.

But I have had some cats "leave" while "youngish" (10) and as old as 16.5.  I divide my "cat life" into 2 parts.  Those who came before I moved to a house and those after.  I don't know why my apartment cats tended to leave early.  But Ralph, Sport-sport, and Mischief left at around 10.  

Tinkerbelle came with me to the house.  She often stayed out at night and would be napping on the front steps in the morning.  One day, I let her out in the morning and she wouldn't return when I called her when I was going fishing.  I never saw her again.  But she was 15.  She didn't like Skeeter or LC so maybe she just decided to go off on her own.  Maybe she found a new family.  But I will never know.

If I ever stand before a Deity that offers me the answer to one question, I will ask what happened to Tinkerbelle.  She vanished in 1999, and it has bothered me ever since.

In the "house" years, I have gained and lost Skeeter, LC, and Iza.  Those losses were painful, of course, but both Skeeter and LC lived to 16.5 years and there are limits to lifetimes.  The 16+ years were a joy.  But even then, I was away at work almost all their lives.  Skeeter lived his last few years with me around after I retired and maybe that is why he lived longer that the previous ones.  

LC died a year after Skeeter and maybe from missing him.  She was actually Skeeter's cat, as odd as that sounds.  She was devoted to him.  After Skeeter died, she sat around for months.  Ayla was there, but LC didn't want anything to do with here.  LC finally came up on my lap her last few months and she had never done that before.  

I happily gave her all the attention she would accept.  But I think she just died of a broken heart, missing Skeeter.  I found her in the basement comatose one morning and rushed her to the Vet.  She died there after briefly regaining some conciousness.  

So, I accept that my cats will die at some age or another, and that I will be around when they do.  I will cry deeply when they do, but will remember the good times.  It is that I see more partings coming that causes me to write this.  

I mentioned I see Marley getting older fast.  He is only 10 but looking arthritic and slower.  Well, if he lives a long elder years life, great.  I was kind of getting used to cats that lived to 16, but if that is not his longevity, I'll accept it.  Not all people live to average life span either.  

Ayla turns 14 on the 17th.  And purebreeds like Siamese tend to have shorter lives.  If she gets to 16, I will be thrilled.  But there WILL come a day when I hold her mortal remains and decide where to dig a deep hole and build a new memorial box to set above the spot.

Iza's death was a shock.  I knew she was laying around on her beloved heaty mat more often.  And she wasn't eating as much as usual.  So I scheduled a Vet visit for the next day for a "wellness check".  I was up and about, ready for the visit and discovered Iza laying on the heaty mat with blood all over her backside.  

I immediately called the Vet and they said I could bring her right in.  I did.  They had a "no entry" policy due to covid.  But after 5 minutes, they handed me a mask and said "come in".  She was within a couple hours of death.  And they asked me what I wanted them to do.

"To do" when she was obviously suffering something horrible?  OK, yeah, I understand.  I had to make the call.  She was actually slightly awake.  I held her head in my hands and told her she was a Good Girl and a joy of my life and I would never forget her.  I saw her eyes focus on me.  Then the Vet pushed the shot.  I had my ear to her chest, hearing the purrs.  And I heard when they stopped...

So I am in a thoughtful contemplative mood lately.  Ayla is normally aging and Marley seems to be aging too quickly.  I sadly suspect I will be saying my goodbyes to them both in a couple of years.  

Laz is a good cat with me.  He really likes ME!  And I am waiting on a Tonkinese female in August.  Not an Iza clone, of course, but a kitty like her.  Tonkies are naturally attached to people.  That's all I ask.

The individual members of The Mews will change, but there is continuity.  Someday Lapis Lazuli may be the senior member and peacekeeper of the family.  Or not.  One never knows...

I often think of the Roman God Janus, who looked both behind and before.  We can do that, for happiness or sadness.

Thankful Thursday

AYLA:  We are thankful today because TBT has always loved cats.  From the 1st (Kenani) when he was a child, to us here now. 

We talk to him sometimes about The Cats Who Came Before.

Kenani was a female Siamese.   The picture is lost.  Hai Yu was another.  That picture is also lost.  Gramma loved female Siamese cats and it stuck with TBT.

The only time he didn't have a cat in his life was while in college.  They weren't allowed in the dormitories...

When he escaped college and joined an apartment of other male Beins, he was offerred a stray.  Of course he took it and a 2nd.  Ralph and Sport-Sport.  Both grey tabby females, but hey, we are all cats.  He had trouble feeding hisself, but he always made sure the cat was fed first.

There were several grey tabby females.  He got a house with Mischief and later, Tinkerbelle  (Both grey tabby females).  Mischief was a sweet little cat who died at 12.  Tinkerbelle was wounded in the spine by a dog attack before he got her, so he stroked her very carefully and she appreciated that.  Meanwhile, he found Skeeter and LC.  Tinkerbelle vanished one day.  He went around calling for her for a week.

Skeeter and LC stayed for 16 years each.  TBT found each of them at a small local pet store a year apart.  Skeeter adored him and LC adored Skeeter.  It was deliberate.  TBT was gone most of the day, so Skeeter needed a companion and TBT kept it that way.  Skeeter was TBT's cat and LC was Skeeter's cat.  It worked.

He retired in 2006.  Skeeter was happy, but LC didn't quite know what to do around him all day.  She just stayed by Skeeter.  TBT found me (Ayla, unwanted as a Queen by a breeder because I was too small) early 2008.  He finally had a Siamese female again!

Skeeter went over The Bridge in Dec 2008.  I loved him as a good brofur, but LC felt abandoned.  I was always a lapcat but LC didn't know what to do with herself after Skeeter left.  She had allus had Skeeter.  After a couple moons, she finally went up on TBT's lap and purred.  

I didn't mind.  I liked LC.  She was kind.  Sometimes we shared The Lap.  But she missed Skeeter a lot and left us to join him 13 moons later.

So TBT went looking for a friend for me.  He found another Siamese female cat.  She had papers and everything (just as I did of course) but she wasn't.  The kitties at "A Tonk's Tail" told us she was a Tonkie.  Which TBT dint know of so he looked it up on the puter.  And there was a picture of a female Tonkie looking just like Iza!

Sadly, we dint get along great, so TBT went looking for another orange/white male like Skeeter (such a calm peaceable cat) and was finally guided to The Right One.  A lady had been given a cat but discovered she was allergic.  

When TBT went to her house, she called Marley downstairs and he settled right into TBT's lap!   That kind of decided things.  And he liked the name so Marley stayed Marley.  Marley settled right into the house.  Orange/white male cats seem to be peace-keepers and he did that for Iza and me.

Iza and I even napped together afterwards, so long as Marley was between us.  Iza and I got along mainly but we needed Marley when things got hissy.  He was allus there to sit between us and remind us ta get along.

It was a shock when Iza went over The Bridge.  It was sudden.  She wasn't eating, an TBT had a vet visit scheduled one morning.  But that morning, she was suddenly bleeding out her backside and we all knew it was Her Time.  

She was only 12 so that made me worried about being 13, ya know?  TBT assures me she lived her life fast and I have more years.  Well, Skeeter and LC both reached 16+.  So I guess that's OK.

He got Laz as a rescue from the place I came from.  He was unwanted.  Well, so was I and Iza too.  And Marley (from elsewhere), come ta think about it.  Wow, even Skeeter and LC too.  Gee even Tinkerbelle was and the others.  Maybe that's why we are here.  TBT has a soft spot for cats like us.  

He says we have a new kitten arriving in August.  It will be the first he has ever asked for to wait and get.  She will be a Tonkinese like Iza, but mebbe look a little different in furs.  She better be nicer than Iza was to me.  I'll be kind, Marley will (of course) be kind.  Laz better be nice to her or I'll bite HIS ear!

I'll want to protect a young sisfur.  4 Big Moons from now I think.  It will be innerestin...

Mischief on the left, Tinkerbelle on the right.  The one in between was the Gramma's cat Jeremy who stayed with the TBT when the Granparents went to Florida each Winter.  

We like it when TBT tells us about the Cats Who Came Before.  It means we know we will stay here with him all our days...

World Cat Day

TBT here:  I got to thinking about World Cat Day.  You know, with cats and Dad being around...  I read the blogs and see the kittehs who have had long happy lives with one Bein like me.  I see the rescue/shelter blogs where kittehs long for homes.  It tears my heart.  The hard part is when I think "could I do one more"?

For now, the household is calm and happy, and I will not change it.  Marley settled Ayla and Iza down from girlcat hissyfits, and all is good.  I am reluctant to chance disrupting a peaceful household (not being sexist, a girlcat can settle two fussing mancats too).  But peaceful is peaceful.

But there will come a day when (if I live as long as family history suggests), they will pass over the Rainbow Bridge before me and I will want more cat-companionship. 

But until then, it will be Ayla, Iza, and Marley. 

On that day, I will seek out an old cat that needs a final place to call a "forever home" for the first or last time.  And I will cherish it for the love of THAT cat, and for all older cats in general.  If it wants to live alone with me, I will do that.  If it wants a cat-companion even in old age, I will do that too.

Unless there is some unusual situation, there will be no more kittens at my house.  I'll miss that, but it is a practical matter.  I might not outlive them.  So rather than uproot a growing cat, I will help old cats the next time around.  Its not a good decision either way.  Kittens deserve homes as much as older cats do.  But I think older cats need homes, get ones fewer, and are probably feeling lost more than kittens are.  Sometimes no choices are perfect.

I suspect that giving a few older cats some safe house and loving attention at least one final time, when I am old too outlive kittens, is probably the sensible thing I can do.  It will be a while.  Ayla is oldest at 5 and I'm 62.  Marley just turned 2.  But when I am 78, Marley will be 18, and that is about the best I can hope for.  And after 78, I'll be "iffy".  It wouldn't be fair to bring a kitten into the house then, knowing it would likely outlive me.

When my mother, at age 80, and declined to get a new cat after her loved cat Jeremy died, I suggested she get a kitten, assuring her I would take it in if she couldn't care for it.  Now I understand better.

In my last thoughts, there will be many cat names to recall.  My last thought may be Skeeter.  Or perhaps Iza, one never knows.  Iza is astonishingly me-oriented and I can't say for sure which cat will be on my last breath.  But I hope it will be the thoughts of ALL the cats.  When I pass over the Bridge, I will hope to see them all.

But just maybe, there will be one I left behind and I will linger on the Bridge for, to make sure it can join me.

One never knows...