House-training
House-training is defined in
dictionaries as, among other things, Taming, Training, Disciplining,
Domesticating, Schooling. I am immersed in the process and have been for some
while as there are two young animals in the house. They are both at similar
stages but I would suggest that the younger of the two is generally more
reliable though still prone to occasional ‘accidents’.
‘Two young animals?’ I imagine
you asking. ‘Why, yes,’ I reply, ‘Frankie and Roxy.’
Frankie with a favourite 'rocket' ice lolly
Roxy
Roxy, Lolly (Bethan's dog) and Frankie last week
They are two young animals, just
not of the same species. Frankie is a human animal and we will be celebrating
his third birthday in three weeks’ time. Roxy is a chocolate Labrador and
she will be eight months old in two weeks’ time.
There are advantages and
disadvantages in the training of each of these animals. A young puppy, a ‘baby’
puppy, must be taken out to relieve itself after every meal and every time it
wakes from its frequent sleeps. This includes the wee, small hours, a
particularly inviting time to stumble from the comfort of one’s bed in the
chilly pre-dawn or post-midnight to carry the warm, cuddly, licking, squeaky
bundle of soft fur downstairs and outside. Small puppies need reassurance, encouragement
and company and must be accompanied in all weathers. It is advisable to have
them safely secured by a slip lead in case they disappear into the usually damp
gloom of a shrubbery or a dark corner in an inaccessible part of the garden.
Even if you opt to confine your
puppy to the ground floor, usually the kitchen, you will still have to get up in
the middle of the night to let it out. If you don’t you will be greeted in the morning
with a task that cannot be delayed, especially if the puppy has, shall we say,
spread it around a bit . . .
When Roxy was a baby, not so very
long ago, her night-time ventures coincided with the nocturnal visitations of
our local rat population. These rodents, sleek, bold and well-fed (on fish food and bird cake),
orchestrated the evening air with shrill squeaks and squeals. Our adult dogs
would have had no truck with them but Roxy was simply curious, her head tilting
from side to side as she attempted to catch sight of the creatures making such
interesting noises.
However, a human baby is rather easier
in that it can be enfolded in a nappy, at least the bits that leak so
haphazardly. Certainly it must be kept as dry and comfortable as possible and
when very new it requires food at irregular intervals throughout the day and
predominantly, or so it seems to the sleep-deprived parents, through the night,
As it grows, the intervals between feeds and nappy changes lengthen and parental
dreams of periods of sleep longer than two hours may be realised. When it has
entered toddlerhood the challenge of ‘potty-training’ arises. Talk at toddler
groups centres on the relative success or failure of these still young and
innocent human animals to master the whole messy business – and it can be very
messy. Gone are the days of lifting your charge into the air to sniff its
behind to ascertain whether a change is optional (wet) or essential (more than
wet). Now the focus is on the manner of the toddler’s fidgeting punctuated
with, ‘Do you want a pee/ poo? Oh, too late, never mind,’ as the third or fourth
set of clothes of the morning are removed and replaced.
Now, there are certain problems
that arise when toddlers and animals live together that may not present
themselves in solely human homes. Roxy piddles on the floor, an accident that would
have been avoided if we had only been paying attention. Frankie piddles on the
floor – another accident that would have been avoided et cetera, et cetera.
It is not just in the matter of ‘hygiene
training’ (how euphemistic can you get?)
that toddlers copy pets. Frankie kneels on the floor and drinks from the cats’
and dogs’ communal two-gallon bucket of water – it’s fun and he enjoys it and
the water is clean . . . isn’t it? On
other occasions he climbs into Roxy’s indoor kennel (crate) to lie down on her bedding. It’s cosy, it’s comfortable and
it’s got some really interesting toys in it and he can carry them in his mouth,
just like she does. Out for a walk in the forest he copies Roxy and picks up a
stick - and puts it in his mouth.
More worryingly, and this is why
toddlers and animals should never be left unsupervised together, he gets down
on all fours and pushes his head against hers. She’s a puppy, she loves it and responds
like a puppy but puppies play roughly and have sharp teeth and so we intervene,
Frankie is learning – and so is Roxy.
So, in the matter of
house-training, Roxy and Frankie are making progress but it’s easier with puppies
than humans, I think. Nonetheless, I’m
sure it’s only a matter of time before I sit Roxy on the loo and put Frankie
outside to relieve himself.