Letter To A Friend PARA + PREP + QUESTIONS

Your friend has been asked by their boss at work to apologise to a colleague for missing a meeting.
Your friend is unsure whether to apologise and how to apologise so that their boss is satisfied.
Write a letter to your friend, giving advice on what they should do.
In your letter you should:

-evaluate the ideas about apologising given in both texts
-explain why your friend should or should not apologise, and how to deal with the situation at work.
Base your letter on what you have read in both texts, but be careful to use your own words. Address
both of the bullet points.
Write about 250 to 350 words.
Text A:
Yesterday, after complaints I'd made to an online retailer for their very poor customer service, I
finally received an email in reply. 'At last,' I thought, 'an apology.' And indeed, it was an apology of
sorts: a careful set of stock phrases which expressed some limited awareness of their shortcomings
with a flourish at the end, hoping that I would 'return very soon to purchase from our unique range
of bestselling rugs and soft furnishings.' Now, I know saying sorry is never easy, but I was left with the
impression that this writer had been schooled in some business training session that taught
employees how to turn an apology into a marketing tool!
There's a lot of apologising these days. But, like my email, is there any real substance to such acts of
contrition if they are merely designed to reflect well on whoever is making them?
Everyday apologies are part of polite discourse in many cultures, of course. We apologise for
interrupting people in meetings - as we interrupt them - and we often apologise for things that aren't
even our fault, just to keep the wheels of civilised life turning. I taught my children to apologise for
their misdemeanours as soon as they could speak, though it rarely prevented further incidents of
snatching toys from their siblings or having a tantrum in a shop. However, in adult life, and especially
at work, apologies (even for glaringly obvious errors) are often considered the ultimate weakness.
Perhaps the online company who offered me their 'apologies' yesterday for wasting my time, sending
me the wrong item, taking my money and refusing to return it for weeks were reluctant to admit
their faults for fear I would require some compensation as a token of their sincerity. Actually, a real
apology would have been sufficient, and I might well have been more disposed to peruse their
unique ranges again as a result. As things are, I'll be staying well clear of their soft furnishings and
their grudging apologies.
Text B:
Saying 'I'm sorry', even when you're not at fault, is an automatic reaction. You've probably said it
many times this week. Over-apologising for things you can't control can make people think less of
you. Apologising for sneezing, being pushed into someone else or being interrupted could backfire
on you.
A leading psychotherapist says that over-apologising, or apologising because you think you should, is
harmful: you may think you're presenting yourself as a caring person, but you're sending the
message that you lack confidence and are ineffectual. 'It can give some people permission to treat
you poorly,' she warns.
Such behaviour can also lessen the impact of a necessary apology. If you say 'I'm sorry' for every little
thing, it will carry less weight for situations that warrant a sincere apology. We all know someone
who constantly apologises, and it can be irritating.
One study found that apologising for intentionally rejecting someone, such as cancelling plans you've
made, could make the other person feel that they have to forgive before they are ready. Apologising
for your own sake, rather than to acknowledge the hurt caused, can be perceived as insulting.
Choosing not to apologise may even have psychological benefits. Researchers found that people who
refused to express remorse showed signs of greater self-esteem.
However, there are some circumstances in which a sincere apology is beneficial. A professor of
behavioural science explained that some apologies can encourage forgiveness and repair
relationships, but they require more than just saying 'I'm sorry': the person must express genuine
remorse and offer to make amends in a meaningful way. We protect ourselves from facing the
possibility that we messed up and from rejection. An apology, no matter how heartfelt, does not
always elicit forgiveness.
The debilitating effects of the shame we may feel when we've hurt another person can eat away at
us. By taking responsibility for our actions, we help rid ourselves of self-reproach and guilt. Some
people feel that genuinely apologising can help us develop self-respect if we have the courage to
admit we are wrong and don't offer excuses. Saying sorry helps us remain emotionally connected to
others. Knowing we have wronged someone may cause us to distance ourselves from the person, but
once we have apologised, we can become closer.
Dear Ahmed,
I hope this letter finds you well. I understand that you've been asked by your boss to apologize to a
colleague for missing a meeting, and you're unsure about how to proceed. To help you navigate this
situation, I've evaluated the ideas about apologizing presented in both Text A and Text B.
Text A highlights the importance of sincere apologies, emphasizing that a well-crafted apology can go
a long way in resolving issues and maintaining good relationships. The text suggests that superficial
apologies, such as those made for the sake of appearance, may not hold much value. In your
situation, apologizing may be necessary to maintain a positive working relationship with your
colleague.
On the other hand, Text B brings up the issue of over-apologizing. It warns that apologizing for every
minor incident, especially when you're not at fault, can backfire and make you appear lacking in
confidence and ineffectual. It's essential to consider the context and the necessity of the apology.
Now, regarding your specific situation at work, my advice would be to offer a sincere apology to your
colleague. Missing a meeting is an error, and taking responsibility for it can help maintain a
professional and respectful atmosphere. However, be mindful not to over-apologize. Make it clear
that you're apologizing for the missed meeting and express your commitment to avoid such
situations in the future.
In your apology, it's crucial to acknowledge your mistake, express genuine remorse, and offer a
solution to make amends. This approach aligns with the ideas presented in Text B, where a sincere
apology is beneficial in certain circumstances. By doing this, you show maturity, responsibility, and a
willingness to maintain a healthy working relationship.
In conclusion, apologize sincerely for the missed meeting, but be mindful not to overdo it. A well-
balanced apology, as advocated in Text A and Text B, can help resolve the situation and demonstrate
your professionalism. It's an opportunity to repair any damage, improve your working relationships,
and maintain your self-respect.
Your friend,
Taahaa

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Your friend has been asked by their boss at work to apologise to a colleague for missing a meeting.

In your letter you should:

Write about 250 to 350 words.

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