15 - PROSOCIAL BEHAVIOUR

Altruism: belief/practice of selfless concern for well-being of others - helping purely for the sake of providing benefit to another person (altruistic motivation). 3 types - reciprocity-based,
care based, kin based. Egoistic: caring about own needs - helping in order to obtain reward or avoid punishments (egoistic motivation) - monetary reward, public praise, avoid punishment,
lessens personal distress.
Kindness & Well-Being - Meta-analysis of kindness interventions - performing random acts of kindness has a positive effect on the well-
being of the actor
Empathy: ability to understand/share feelings of another - modest level of heritability (dispositional) & situationally induced.
Emp - challenging - mental/emotional effort required, recipient is an outgroup member, beliefs about one’s ability to be emp
Case Against Emp - poor guide for moral reasoning, individuals/societies make ethical judgment become less sensitive to the suffering of
greater number s of people
Sympathy: feelings of pity/sorrow for someone else misfortune. Compassion: emotional response when perceiving suffering & authentic
desire to help - an instinctive response - move towards connection and away from self-focus - benefits giver
Compassion Fatigue - responses weaken with repeated exposure to suffering; state of exhaustion may result from actively caring for others,
knowledge/exposure to others’ suffering, repeated exposure to negative news - protective factors include job satisfaction & support
inside/outside work
-Is it a Self-Fulfilling Prophecy - measured participants’ beliefs about compassion fatigue. Study 1 - looked at images of others’ suffering & rated response, Study 2 - rated compassion
towards Covid related suffering in monthly surveys Sep-Dec 2020. Transgression Motivations Questionnaire - Avoidance - trying to keep distance, living as if they don’t exist, withdraw from
them. Revenge - ill make them pay, im going to get even, i wish that something bad would happen to them
Forgiveness - less desire to avoid transgressing harm, increased desire to act positively - willingness to abandon one’s right to resentment, neg judgment, indifferent behaviour Intrapersonal -
overcoming anger, resentment, negative judgment. Interpersonal - expressing feelings of good will and avoiding negative - journey
-more likely to forgive if transgressor apologizes sincerely, apology matches victim’s preferences - recreate equality or re-connect. Forgiveness Interventions - 6 weekly, 90 min group
sessions - education about neg consequences of grudge holding, improve emotional regulation, reduce rumination, auto thoughts, grievance narratives, meditation and relaxation. Results -
reduced neg thoughts and feelings about transgression, lowered stress/anger, increased forgiveness, self-efficacy. Holding on to anger & resentment hurt you emotionally and physically,
forgiveness does not necessitate relationship maintenance. Gratitude: towards a person emerges when one receives a positive outcome from that person, who has behaved in a way that was -
costly to them, valuable to recipient, intentionally rendered. When participants were not used to getting help from friends, they felt more grateful when someone did help them and vice versa.
Develop stronger relationships, higher level of forgiveness, patience
Measurement of gratitude - 6 item. Related to materialism. Weekly gratitude journals - more exercise, optimism, felt better about lives, enthusiasm, alertness, determination, progress goals,
Gratitude has a positive affect - is a practice. Gratitude & Relationships - + life satisfaction, optimism, positive emotions - gratitude for partner’s behaviour increases relation quality for both
partners. People underestimate the positive effects of showing gratitude. The witness Effect - people are more positive towards givers and receivers of gratitude that they have witnessed as a
third party. 5 Don’t of Gratitude - don’t overdose on gratitude, don’t prevent from recognizing own effort and value don’t apply to wrong person, don’t use to avoid dealing with serious
problems, don’t let dynamics get in the way.

16 - ATTACHMENT AND LOVE

Attachment Theory - Bowlby - orphans in London - identified maladaptive / adaptive parental behaviours.
Attachment: an emotional bond to one’s caregiver as an infant. 3 components: proximity maintenance (keep close to caregiver), secure base (feel comfortable exploring in caregiver’s
presence), safe haven (seek comfort from caregiver when distressed). Inconsistency leads to anxiety, young stressors insecure, developmental struggles
Strange Situation - examines reaction of child to novel situation & stranger, with caregiver leaving and returning. Secure - able to cope with parental absence, Insecure - increasing tensions
over situation, insecure-avoidant - avoid caregiver, insecure-resistant - hostility to caregiver but also want to be held. - longer term consequences of insecure attachment relationship problems,
emotional disorders, mental, conduct problems. Secure provides safe environment for children to explore, take chances, new relations, growth
healthy adults
Styles - based on history with caregiver, develop a tendency to relate to others in certain manner. Secure: comfortable with intimacy, autonomy,
trusting, constructive attributions & behaviour general lack of concern of being abandoned, comfort with emotional closeness, higher WB
Dismissing: secure with self - not trusting of others, dismiss intimacy, seek independence. Preoccupied: ruminates about relationship, overly
seeks intimacy, jealous, clingy. Fearful: ruminates about relationships, not trusting, scared of and avoids intimacy
-negative toward self = anxiety - negative toward others = avoidance -The secure style is low on both dimensions, the dismissing style is high on
avoidance and low on anxiety, the preoccupied style is low on avoidance and high on anxiety, and the fearful style is high on both avoidance and
attachment anxiety.-higher attachment anxiety associated with greater distress for negative events, < relationship-threatening attributions for -
events, > relationship-enhancing attributions for + events.
Attachment Style & Relationship - couples videotaped while trying to solve major relationship problem. Anxious individuals - more stress,
anxiety, anger. Avoidance Individuals - over-estimate intensity of partner’s neg emotions, less warm & supportive towards partner
Attachment & Friendship - friendship satisfaction in adult is associated with health & WB. Attachment security in childhood predicts satisfaction
with closest friends in early adulthood
Attachment Over Time - can be self-perpetuating but can differ by relationship & change with relationship experiences.
Love - beliefs. Romantic Love - love finds a way, one and only, idealization, love at first sight. -(1) eros, the search for the
beautiful; (2) philia, the affection in friendship; (3) nomos, submission and obedience to the divine; and (4) agape, or the
bestowal of love by the divine.Long Term - strong romantic beliefs are more likely to stay together, endorsement of romantic
beliefs decrease after breakup. Self-Expansion - individuals seek to increase capacity to achieve goals, enrich identities, learn
new things. Greater self-expansion predicts + outcomes for people in romantic relationships - self-expansion predicts
commitment most strongly for people motivated to self-expand. Speaks to - why we are attracted to certain people, who some
relationships fizzle out, how to cope breakup in + way. People seek to expand themselves through love - choosing people
similar to them. Beliefs About Marriage - committed relationship ideology - all people want to marry/couple, committed
relationship is most important adult relationship, source of happiness, people in committed relations are ‘better’ people.
Marriage and SWB - married people are happier than non-married but quality matters. Does marriage make people happy?
Protection Effect - marriage makes people happy. Selection Effect - happier people more likely to get married. How Happy Are Single Ppl - depends on why they are single - happier if high
interest in independence and low in affiliation, attachment style - high anxiety greater desire for partner less satis in singlehood, how satisfied with life - higher life satis higher single satis

17- FLOURISHING RELATIONSHIPS

Minding Relationships - paying attention, not acting out of habit, creating new experience = knowing/being known (being open and authentic -each partner in the relationship must want to
know the other person’s hopes, dreams, fears, vulnerabilities, & uncertainties), accepting/respecting, maintaining reciprocity, continuity in minding
Empathic Accuracy - ability to accurately infer the content of another person’s thoughts/feelings - watch tape of your discussion, not feelings/meanings; guess partners - typically associated
with + relation outcomes
Making Relationship-Enhancing Attributions - judgements about causes of behaviour
Accepting/Respecting - Partner’s Faults/Differences. Positive Illusions - unrealistically favorable attitudes people have of their partners - predict greater satisfaction, love, and trust, less
conflict, in both dating and marital - self-fulfilling effects -when couples starting with high negative and had high positive illusions just as likely to stay together as low negativity
Maintaining Reciprocity - fair balance of benefits - social exchange theory. Outcome = Rewards - Costs. Satisfaction = Outcome - Comparison Levels. Dependency = Outcome -
comparison level for alternatives. -lack of conscious engagement displayed by one partner can lead to frustration or contempt on the part of the other partner. -rewards outweigh costs,
expectations for outcomes they deserve, perception of alternatives available to them, perception of fairness
Continuity in Minding - being flexible and adaptable as relationships change over time -goals and needs may change for many reasons (personal growth, internal/external stressors on
relationship, individual or relationship experiences, shifts in family or friends).
Communication -bids for attention - attempt to create connection between 2 ppl. Responding to bids - turning toward, turning away, turning against. Sending Bids - clear and direct, easy to
turn towards
Capitalization -how do happy couples talk about positive experiences. Active-constructive responding -Enthusiastic, genuine interest.Passive-constructive responding - Mild + response.
Active-destructive responding- Points out neg. Passive-destructive responding - general disinterest.
-Effect of capitalization on positive affect and life satisfaction is enhanced when others react actively and constructively. Active-constructive responding is associated with higher relationship
well-being. Increases perceived value of + event, increases trust & perceived closeness
Brene Brown Ted - vulnerability is not weakness, but foundation of authentic connection, courage, and empathy - allows deeper connections. Wholehearted living - cultivating self
compassion, letting go of perfectionism & need for certainty.

18 - School & Work

Positive Schooling - Foundation - care, trust, respect for diversity - developmental discipline, grounded in attachment theory. Care - responsive, available teachers - provide secure base,
better behaviours in class, acceptance. Trust - yield psych and perform - establish trusting relations with the most difficult students (ripple effect). Diversity - encourage students to be
sensitive to diverse ideas from all ppl, showing students commonalities bt/wn those different from the, encourage inclusivity, give voice to all groups, allow children to also take pride in
heritage. 2nd Floor - Goals - stretch goals - slightly more difficult than obtained previously - teacher & student create goals. Motivation - teachers’ own enthusiasm - risks, new approaches,
expectations, praise. Hope - learning how to learn - ‘I can’ motivation, students acquire spirit - learning expands increase empowerment. Societal Contributions - empowerment to educate
others, + education turns students into teachers who continue to share learnings, passed on to wide range.
Promoting Whole Child Development - instructional strategies, social/emotional develop, supportive environ, system of supports -Key Understandings of Learning - brain development is
shaped by consistent supportive relations, learning is social, emotional, academic, & adversity produces stress that affects learning/behave
Gainful Employment: work that contributes to healthy life - variety in duties - boredom, unproductive, unhappy. Safe - management cares for welfare. Income - minimum income to
provide. satisfaction, + engagement, purpose, performing well, companionship - ppl with work friends more psych and phys engaged, diverse/inclusive. Performance increases job satis
Employee Engagement - positive, fulfilling state of mind - energy, involvement, efficacy - + emotions, problemsolving/creativity, helpful behave, social support, achievement, approach
orientation -promoted by being in flow - skill variety, task identity, task significance, autonomy, feedback -little evidence that individual level interventions are effective
-Career self-efficacy: personal confidence in one’s capacity to handle career development &work-related goal activities, related to both success&satisfaction with one’s occupational
efforts&decisions -goals offer satis when met.
Leadership -top 10 - provide clear goals/duties, aware of bias/power, genuine interactions, ethical, honest, find employee strengths, trust, encourage views/feedback, set reasonable standards,
deliver corrective feedback. Strengths @ Work -recognize strengths, develop them - match ppl, don’t ‘fix’ them - assign workers to jobs where they can apply their talents. Identify talents,
integration of talents into employee self image, behavioral change - attributes success to talents. -myths - fixing our weaknesses is better than building strengths, u can do anything u put ur
mind to - related to low self-esteem.
Meaning in Work - job:earning a living, career:source of achievement, competition, satisfaction, calling: source of fulfillment, serving a purpose, contributing to greater good/larger than
they are, work is fulfilling without $. Finding Meaningful Work - accept confusion, don’t pigeonhole self, aim to be wide achiever vs high, find values & talents meet, act first - reflect later,
approach work as life long experiment -occupations can be crafted in meaningful ways - perception of contribution, nature of relationships. Follow Passion - most ppl indicate passion
important goal but few report being passionate about work - don’t find passion but develop, challenging to pursue passion as it wanes, has its limits - overconfidence, exploitation

19 - Excellence & Creativity

Excellence: the acquisition of extraordinary skill / talent in a specific area - talent shows low heritability, not likely result of a single trait. Nurture: experience, opportunity, practice - better
violinists practiced for more time - deliberate practice and performance positive correlations. Increasing Success - earlier age, focus on training, recovery from injury, tech to fine tune
techniques, will to break a barrier. Motivation: Grit = persistence + passion - grit predicts academic performance better than IQ - grit is highly heritable, may have little impact beyond
conscientiousness. Passion: self-defining activities that one loves, finds important, invests time & energy. Teams - should you pack your teams with superstars - no, cohesiveness important
Creativity: developing something original, novel, surprising, unexpected, adaptive - making a meaningful contribution to culture. Little c creativity: every day. Big C: transforms
culture/history. Creativity&Brain: 1. Executive Function 2. Imagination 3. Salience. Creative Process - how it happens, how creative works develop
Preparation: information gathers, ideas generate.
Incubation: cognitive processing beneath surface.
Illumination: creative solution emerges unexpectedly as an insight.
Verification: creative solutions shaped to final form
Divergent Thinking: thinking in many ways that may/may not show direct relevance to a solution. Convergent Thinking: problem-solving converge on single correct answer
Alternate Uses Test -think of as many uses as possible for - chair, mug, paper clip - test measures divergent thinking. Fluency: how many uses you come up with. Originality: how
uncommon those uses are. Flexibility: how many areas your answers cover. Elaboration: level of detail in responses. Children more creative.

20 - Balanced View of Positive Psychology

The Problem with +ve Thinking -fantasizing about happy outcomes can hinder people from attaining them - losing weight, recovering from surgery, performing well on exam, getting job
Alternative - Mental Contrasting -Wish, Outcome, Obstacle, Plan. Acceptance of -ve Emotions -less depressive symptoms with higher acceptance
Dark Side of Happiness
-wrong time - safe vs threatening environments, emotions signal to others - +ve emotions can set the course of social interactions - happiness perceived
safe and favourable environments
-wrong type - negative social consequences, may not be aligned with culture values - some types appear to impair social functioning and some are not
aligned with culture’s definition of appropriate happiness
-wrong degree - high +ve emotion or extremely low -ve emotion - at a very high level ppl experience no psych/health gains, mania - increases risk taking
behaviours
-wrong pursuit - at expense of others’ WB, paradox of pursuing happiness directly - the more ppl pursue happiness, less they seem to obtain it - the goals
ppl value determine what people want to achieve and standards - more likely to become disappointed when not reach standards - FLOW - activities
engaged in for own sake rather than extrinsic activity
Can Ppl be Too Happy
-world values survey - PPL with HIGH levels of happiness - success in close relationships & volunteer work. PPL with moderate - success in income
& education. Most cheerful were not the group that made most $.
-reason valuing happiness backfire - higher standards for happiness, ppl not always accurate about what will help them achieve happiness, monitor
their attainment of happiness goal
Seeking Sadness-enjoying - music, movies, novels, paintings - emotionally extreme life experiences are more meaningful, regardless of +ve or -ve
Importance of Context - psychological traits not inherently +ve or -ve but promote/undermine WB depends on context - in relationships optimism,
kindness, forgiveness, +ve attributions
What is a Life Well-Lived - limits of happiness & satisfaction as outcomes (full involvement in life includes -ve experiences, happiness as by-
product rather than goal) -alternative goals to happiness - personal meaning/purpose, prosocial pursuits
How to Live Better
-diagnose yourself - know your happiness setpoint, understand strength/weakness
-improve mental hygiene - cognitive therapy, meditation, exercise
-improve relatedness - work on valued relationships, share activities & friends
-improve work - reframe work as a calling, use strengths
-improve connection to something beyond self - participate in religion, or some other organization with noble purpose & history
-Others look for strengths around you now as you have learned that they are there. To shift your vision to see both a positive picture and a negative picture is not easy at first, but we promise
that as you do it more frequently you will be able to see both more clearly and more easily
Self - we may have a tendency to focus more on our weaknesses as opposed to our strengths - sometimes focusing more heavily on the one area of improvement and ignoring the seven other
areas where you showed strength. Although this may be a common way of imbibing information, it does not have to be the only way. We can work instead to see our own strengths more
clearly and to think about ways that we can enhance and develop them. Once you begin to see strengths within yourself more clearly, you might see other positive changes in your life—
namely, that you might begin to view yourself in a more positive light, developing confidence and self-efficacy
Share/Borrow Strengths we can be purposeful about sharing strengths that we know we possess and about emulating them in others who are close to us - thinking about building your
strengths repertoire, turn to the people you admire most and think more about what you see as their greatest strength