Criticism Defensiveness Contempt Stonewalling: Use Gentle Start Up

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Stop the Four Horsemen with their Antidotes

Use Gentle
CRITICISM Start Up

Take
DEFENSIVENESS Responsibility

Describe Your Own


CONTEMPT Feelings and Needs
Don’t Describe Your Partner

Do Physiological
STONEWALLING Self-Soothing
Copyright © 2014 by Dr. John M. Gottman and Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman. Distributed under license by The Gottman Institute, Inc.

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