Heartfulness Magazine - August 2021 (Volume 6, Issue 8)

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The key takeaways are about heartful communication, compassion, communicating with empathy, and navigating disagreements.

The Heartfulness magazine discusses topics related to meditation, spirituality, leadership and personal growth. It contains articles, interviews and advertisements.

The document mentions the Heartful Adizes Leadership program to learn and apply timeless leadership principles in personal and work life. It also talks about the Post Graduate Diploma in Advanced Yoga to learn how to teach the eight limbs of Yoga.

August 2021

Contentment
DAAJI
Communicate
Altered Traits
RICHARD DAVIDSON
with Love
Heartful
Communication
LIZ KINGSNORTH

Sacred Time
LLEWELLYN
VAUGHAN-LEE

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Design, Art & Photography — Uma Maheswari,
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Writers — Ichak Adizes, Rashi Agarwal, Ruby
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Heartfulness Magazine
Chanchal Meena, Veena Mishra, Amruta Patel,
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Interviewees — Richard Davidson, Tobin Hart,
Dan Siegel

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Dear readers,

Words have impact! When our conversations ooze love and warmth, we can make
someone’s day; when we speak harshly or arrogantly, no matter the reason, we
create disharmony and hurt others. This month, we celebrate the value of heartful
communication, hearing from contributors about compassion, communicating with the
heart, empathic listening, and how to navigate healthy disagreements.

Richard Davidson discusses altered traits and the return to basic goodness. Dan Siegel
explores intraconnectedness and presence. Tobin Hart dives deeper into the relationship
between psychology and spirituality. Llewellyn Vaughan-Lee honors the sacredness
of time. Liz Kingsnorth shares her experience of a lifetime’s work in the field of
communication. And Daaji reflects upon the quality of contentment in his series on
removing and creating habits. In fact, this month, all roads lead to our ability to refine
our habits toward our innate generosity of heart.

Happy reading,

The editors

4 H eart f u l n es s
DAAJI
contributors
Daaji is the current
Heartfulness Guide. He
offers a practical, experiential
RICHARD DAVIDSON
approach to the evolution of Richie is a neuroscientist,
consciousness that is simple, easy speaker, meditator and author.
to follow, and available to people of all ages and walks He is the William James and
of life. Daaji is also a prolific speaker and writer. Vilas Professor of Psychology
Two of his books, The Heartfulness Way and Designing and Psychiatry at the University
Destiny, are #1 bestsellers. of Wisconsin–Madison and the
founder of the Center for Healthy Minds. His work
is focused on the neurobiology of emotion and the
LIZ KINGSNORTH effects of meditation on the human brain. He has
numerous publications in leading scientific journals
Liz has been a Heartfulness and is also the author of many best-selling books
trainer since 1992, and an including his latest, Altered Traits, which provides us
internationally certified with a fascinating view of our ability as humans to
Nonviolent Communication shape our brains.
trainer for 16 years. In Scotland, she
integrates NVC into her work as an organisational
consultant, leadership coach, trainer and counselor.
In India, she spent ten years with the Omega
LLEWELLYN
School in Chennai, and is now training trainers in
Heartful Communication at Kanha Shanti Vanam, VAUGHAN-LEE
near Hyderabad. Liz has a son, a daughter, and four
beloved grandchildren, all living in Australia. Llewellyn is the founder
of The Golden Sufi Center.
Author of several books, he has
DAN SIEGEL specialized in the area of dream
work, integrating the ancient Sufi approach with
Dr. Siegel is a Clinical modern psychology. Since 2000 his focus has been
Professor of Psychiatry at the on spiritual responsibility in our present era and
UCLA School of Medicine, awakening the global consciousness of oneness. He
the co-director of the Mindful has written about the feminine, the world soul and
Awareness Research Center at spiritual ecology. He has been interviewed by Oprah
UCLA, and the Executive Director Winfrey on SuperSoul Sunday, and featured on the
of the Mindsight Institute, for the development Global Spirit series on PBS.
of mindsight, insight, empathy, and integration in
individuals, families, and communities. He is the
author of five New York Times bestsellers and is the
founding editor for the Norton Professional Series on
Interpersonal Neurobiology.

Au gu s t 2 02 1 5
inside

thought
in action
The Pandemic of the
Separate Self - Part 2
Interview with Dan Siegel

focus: 26
innerview
If You Disagree, You Are
The Art of Not Listening
Altered Traits
Communication Dr. Ichak Adizes
Interview with Richard
34 Davidson
Communication: Bridging
the Gap - Part 1 38
Liz Kingsnorth
10

How Communication
Changes Lives
Amruta Patel
Rashi Agarwal
Ruby Carmen
Chanchal Meena
16

H eart f u l n es s
be inspired
The Art of Removing and
Creating Habits - Part 8
Daaji
60

Work in Progress
Ramya Sriram
71

it changes taste
everything of life
How We Know - Part 3 Sacred Time
Interview with Tobin Hart Llewellyn Vaughan-Lee
48 74

Magic to Open the Heart Truth: 3 Haiku Poems


Veena Mishra Rebecca Lilly
57 79

Au gu s t 2 02 1
focus
THE ART OF
COMMUNICATION

I’ve learned that


people will forget
what you said, people
will forget what you
did, but people will
never forget how you
made them feel.

MAYA ANGELOU

Illustration by ANANYA PATEL


Communication:
Bridging the Gap
PART 1

10 H eart f u l n es s
FOC US

In this 3-part series, LIZ KINGSNORTH introduces the basic principles


of Heartful Communication, and how it can guide our understanding
of our personal feelings and the feelings of others, ultimately leading
to a more consistent state of harmony. In part 1, she focuses on the
importance of the quality of our communication.

T
hese are extraordinary times. So much of a workshop, one woman wrote simply, “I’ve always
what we call our “normal life” has been known how I want to live my life and now I have
thrown up in the air like pieces of a puzzle, the tools to do it.”
and the pieces are landing – if at all they do
land – in a different pattern, which may not be This is not just a set of techniques or a toolkit,
recognizable. Amidst this uncertainty and turmoil, however; it’s an awareness and a way of being.
we find our relationships under greater pressure. It weaves together a heart-centered approach
There seems to be conflict and misunderstanding to living, with practical ways to manifest this in
at all levels, within ourselves, between family our daily interactions. Techniques and wisdom
members, at work, within our countries, and from the Heartfulness practices and philosophy
between nations. are interwoven with a process called Nonviolent
Communication, which was developed by Dr.
Many of us are longing to have more harmonious Marshall B. Rosenberg. Both approaches focus on
relationships and to communicate more effectively. the heart, and honor our humanness, recognizing
At a deeper level, we want to interact in a way that that we are imperfect beings with shared yearnings
is in alignment with our core selves, with the best and shared vulnerabilities.
versions of ourselves. I hear people saying things
like, “I want to feel at peace at the end of the So how would it be if we used these very yearnings
day.” No one wants the heaviness that can result and vulnerabilities as a valuable, alive way to realize
from misunderstandings and disagreement. I’m the power of unity and what we have in common,
sure that we all prefer to manage interactions with rather than as evidence of our weakness or
care; we want to listen well, to speak kindly, but collective failure as a species? This lived experience
we struggle to achieve this consistently. Heartful of togetherness is something that Heartful
Communication sets out to meet this need. After Communication offers.

Au gu s t 2 02 1 11
FO C U S

We always communicate from our current level of Yet, even with the best intentions, the noblest
awareness, so the more we can raise our awareness ideals and values, we mess up. We say things we
and refine our inner states, the more likely it is that regret, we trigger hurt in others, and often we don’t
our communication will be refined. The more our know how it happened. We misunderstand and
hearts are open and nurtured, the more compassion we are misunderstood. We can be our own worst
and authenticity will be infusing our connections enemy, especially in our closest relationships. Isn’t
with others and with ourselves. So meditation, this where the toughest tests often arise?
with its power to raise our awareness and to
connect us with our deepest center, holds a key to Let’s remind ourselves that we are products of our
helping us develop a more balanced, loving way of cultural conditioning. Most of us are educated
living and relating. from birth to compete, to compare, to judge, to

12 H eart f u l n es s
FOC US

think in terms of who is right and who is wrong,


who is better or worse, what is normal behavior My individual existence
and what is abnormal. This has led us into a
fractured culture where blaming and shaming
rests in all of humanity.
are the norm. It manifests in our day-to-day Whatever I may think of
communications, in how we raise our children,
in our education systems, our businesses, and our the human race, I am
politics. Instead of wanting to CONNECT we
want to CORRECT. As Marshall Rosenberg says, inextricably a part of it!
we are habitually playing the game of “Who is
right?”
Each of us can and does
make a difference to the
Can you take a moment to reflect: When have
you wanted to be right recently? When have whole, however small, in
you insisted on something, or tried to prove a
point, perhaps? And if you won that round of how we live each moment.
the game and proved yourself to be right, how
do you suppose the other person felt? And how
did you feel deep down? Was it really satisfying What is it that we reward? How do we respond
to have won a point – perhaps at the cost of to mistakes? I was very inspired when I first
the other person feeling embarrassed, small or heard about African communities that are rooted
resentful? Did you win the argument but damage in the strength of Interdependence rather than
the relationship? Is winning, being right, actually Independence – the philosophy of Ubuntu. One
worth it? Ubuntu practice that especially moves me is this:
When someone makes a serious mistake, what we
This way of thinking and conditioning starts early would probably call a crime in our society, that
in our lives. I’d like to share a story, told by a friend person sits surrounded by their community, and
about her daughter in primary school. The teacher for two days everyone reminds him or her of all
organized a running race and told the children that the good, kind things they have done! The idea is
whoever won should grab as many chocolates as that the person has temporarily forgotten their
possible from the bowl. My friend’s daughter won true nature, so the others remind them of who
the race but took only one chocolate. She was then they really are. Having been deeply affirmed and
scolded by the teacher for being disobedient – she restored through this expression of acceptance,
had been told to grab lots of sweets and didn’t. love, and trust, that person is extremely unlikely to
When the distressed child returned home and was repeat the mistake.
asked by her mother what happened, she cried, “If
I had taken lots of chocolates, there wouldn’t have This is a philosophy that has redemption at its
been enough for everyone.” Her natural inclination core. Isn’t the possibility of redemption central to
was to share, to think of others, but here she was a humane society? How radically different this is
being “educated” out of her natural way of being from our idea that shame and punishment will
into winning at the expense of others. reform us, starting with young children, all the way
through to our criminal justice system. If I shame

Au gu s t 2 02 1 13
FO C U S

14 H eart f u l n es s
FOC US

someone, whether through speech or action, am I


not inevitably shaming myself ?

My individual existence rests in all of humanity.


Whatever I may think of the human race, I am
inextricably a part of it! Each of us can and does
make a difference to the whole, however small, in
how we live each moment. For example, we cannot
know what the extended effects of kindness might
be. I remember one day, driving on a highway and
stopping at a toll to pay my fee. To my surprise
the toll attendant told me that the person in the
car in front of me had paid for me! Apparently it
was Random Acts of Kindness Day, which I wasn’t
aware of, and this gesture of drivers paying for
those behind them in the queue had been going on
for an hour or so. In delight, I paid the toll fee for
the car behind me, and I heard later that this chain
of paying for another continued unbroken for
most of the day. I’m sure that this repeated small
gesture, this random act of kindness, will have
generated smiles and opened hundreds of hearts
that day, perhaps changing someone’s dark mood,
with the result that they treated people differently.
We don’t know, but we do know that we enjoy
experiences that connect us. How we communicate
can contribute to the warmth of connection and
unity, or to the chill of separation. It can contribute
to our evolution or to our diminishment.

To be continued.

Illustrations by ANANYA PATEL

Au gu s t 2 02 1 15
H O W C O M M U N ICAT IO N C H A N G E S L I V E S

Turn It Around
I
AMRUTA PATEL is a student at the have been volunteering at COVID-19 vaccine
London School of Hygiene & Tropical centers in London on some of my days off, and
Medicine. She has been studying Marshall what an experience it has been! After a year of
Rosenberg’s Nonviolent Communication stunted conversations over Zoom and carefully
and Heartful Communication for the last extracting myself from situations with too many
several months. Here, she describes an people, I found myself in a massive hall welcoming
experience volunteering at one of the hundreds of strangers on their way to getting their
COVID-19 vaccination centers in London, jabs. It was overwhelming, exciting and sobering
where she was able to apply her newfound to be a part of this group effort to help combat the
communication skills in a challenging virus.
situation.

16 H eart f u l n es s
During one of my shifts, I was working in the I did not have to see this
post-vaccine waiting area, checking on people
to see if they were feeling well during their situation as right or
compulsory period of observation before they
could leave. Everything seemed to be going well, wrong. I could feel
and most people were largely positive about the
experience, while some were still nervous about the compassion toward
vaccine and its effects. The mood was light and the
vibrations happy, when suddenly a man marched
someone without letting
into the room, anger and frustration rolling off their behavior or situation
his shoulders in palpable waves. He exclaimed, “I
refuse to wait! I’ve waited 45 minutes already for upset me or my mood.
this bloody jab,” as he rushed past the paramedics.

I put my hand up and said, “Sir, please wait for


a while so …” and was promptly knocked to the manager was phoning him to ask why he had not
ground. I still don’t believe he meant to do it. I arrived for work yet. If he was paid by the hour,
think I was just in the way, and my arm a bit too perhaps the delay was affecting his ability to make
close to his frame. He moved with such force and a steady income in an already-tough economic
energy that the momentum pushed me over. The climate.
only thing I felt in that moment was shock, as I
turned and watched him stride out of the room. I have no idea what was going through his head
Not even a moment’s pause to apologize! But then that day, but I have learned to look for the drivers
I centered myself and thought, “Everything is all behind someone else’s actions and words. In doing
right. You are fine and no one was hurt.” so, I could remove myself from the situation and
empathize with his potential predicament. You
When I told this story later, my family was upset would think that after eight hours on my feet
at the aggression shown towards me. He could I would have felt incensed and irritated by the
have stopped and helped, or at least said thank you whole event, but I left my shift that day feeling
to the people who took time out of their days to completely happy and fulfilled. I had contributed
volunteer. But perhaps we should ask the question, to something much bigger than him or myself and
“Why did he do it?” had thoroughly enjoyed doing so.

From what I observed in the few moments I I did not have to see this situation as right or
spent in his orbit, he was wearing paint-splattered wrong. I could feel compassion toward someone
clothes usually seen on contractors or workmen. without letting their behavior or situation upset
In addition, the vaccination process was running me or my mood. I cannot think of a more useful
a little late and appointments were delayed that way of interacting with the complex and dynamic
day. Perhaps he had a job to get to, or perhaps his world that surrounds us today.

Au gu s t 2 02 1 17
H O W C O M M U N ICAT IO N C H A N G E S L I V E S

CHANCHAL MEENA

O
ne of my closest friends in my hometown Eventually, she opened up to our private silence.
had a love marriage, which many Her marriage was very rocky, and because it was
considered to be a rebellious act against a love marriage, she could not depend on the
our small society. She looked happy for a few years support of her family to help her. In many places
after marriage, but I quietly sensed that she was in India, even today, there are families who blame
hiding something behind her façade. One day she their children if their love marriages fail. My
came over to visit me, and we eventually reached friend’s parents had clearly told her, “If you have
the topic of relationships and marriage. I never problems later, don’t come to us. This marriage is
force people to share with me, but that day, when your choice.” I stayed quiet as my friend poured
my friend started to cry, I gently comforted her her heart out. There was no sense of urgency from
and simply asked if she wanted to share. me; I would have stayed up all night if needed. I

18 H eart f u l n es s
FOC US

I believe there is great


potential in listening
compassionately. When
people talk to a listener,
they can hear themselves
and become more in tune
with the voice of their
heart. Listening with no
judgment gives people
recognized that painful secrets worth several years
could take time to be expressed. My friend was space to unburden – to
broken, and I eventually picked up on her stream
of thinking. release the clutter – so

That day, it was not my job to tell her right from


that it gives room for the
wrong. It was not my place to criticize her way of heart to speak.
thinking, although I sensed it was biased in one
direction. And it was not my motive to “fix” her
situation. My only job was to listen – to help her
feel lighter – after all, maybe unburdening her pain depression, and constant emotional and mental
would give her clarity on her situation. support was necessary. Slowly, the more she was
able to open up, the more she was able to discover
After she finished speaking, my friend realized her own ways of fixing her problems.
some of her own mistakes that had brought
bitterness in her marriage. I asked her if I I do not take credit for my friend’s recovering
could make suggestions, and when she agreed I marriage. After all, she found her own solutions,
suggested small behavioral changes, and a more carried out her ideas, and kept courage. All I did
compassionate approach towards failure. She was was listen. I believe there is great potential in
ready to try these things because she felt she could listening compassionately. When people talk to
depend on me to support her, listen to her, and talk a listener, they can hear themselves and become
things through with her. more in tune with the voice of their heart.
Listening with no judgment gives people space to
Throughout the next few months, I stayed in unburden – to release the clutter – so that it gives
regular contact with her. She was on the verge of room for the heart to speak.

Au gu s t 2 02 1 19
H O W C O M M U N ICAT IO N C H A N G E S L I V E S

I
sat in the cab on my way to the airport as the
driver zoomed over Delhi’s wide roads. The sun
was rising over the horizon as a new day dawned
– quite literally, as election day approached the city
of Delhi.

The political environment was charged, and so was


the sense of religious divisiveness that came along
with it. Quite naturally, everyday communications
became political conversations, and so it happened
during my cab ride.

After exchanging a few pleasantries, quite


unexpectedly our conversation took a heated turn,
and the driver began to jab hate towards a certain
religious community. Angered, but not wanting to
RASHI AGARWAL destroy the state of serenity in my heart, I paused
and imagined how my spiritual guide would take
this conversation forward.

20
FOC US

I learned that instead The pause allowed me to step into the shoes of
the driver, imagining what his life looked like.
of getting charged up, What was his context? How could I connect to
his life, and appeal to the best that he represented?
by trusting the intrinsic Holding the intrinsic goodness that bound us both
in our hearts, we walked our conversation as if on a
goodness that lies tightrope, and very beautifully it transformed.
within the heart of the A conversation of hatred turned into a
other, magic can conversation of love. Very soon, he began to
acknowledge the close relationships and ties he
happen for both. shared with the community members. By the end
of our cab ride we thanked each other. I learned
that instead of getting charged up, by trusting the
intrinsic goodness that lies within the heart of the
other, magic can happen for both. I was taking a
flight home to Bangalore, and we both reconnected
to the home within us – our Heart.

Illustration by UMA MAHESWARI

Au gu s t 2 02 1 21
H O W C O M M U N ICAT IO N C H A N G E S L I V E S

Our Shared Humanity


RUBY CARMEN

“Compassion is not a relationship between it, and sometimes its absence. One more literal
the healer and the wounded. It’s a relationship definition of compassion is “to suffer together,” and
between equals. Only when we know our although not an exact translation, in Hindi and
own darkness well can we be present with the Urdu we have the word hamdardi – our (shared)
darkness of others. Compassion becomes real pain.
when we recognize our shared humanity.”
Researchers in the field of positive psychology and
—Pema Chödrön emotions describe compassion as the feeling that
comes when faced with the suffering of another,

C
ompassion – just one word – seems so accompanied by the need to relieve that suffering.
relevant in this moment, in particular in
the grieving, loss-filled times we are So, how can we relieve the suffering of others,
living in. especially when everything seems too much?
People often talk of compassion fatigue, but we
It is not always easy to define or capture the true also know that we can clearly be compassionate
meaning of the word, but we can certainly feel and empathic, mirror neurons being considered

22 H eart f u l n es s
FOC US

Empathic listening can allow the speaker to


release and let go of so much, easing their
emotional burdens and feel “met,” cherished,
human. In doing so, we remember our beautiful
and sometimes bruised humanity in all its colors
of joy and sorrow. Our oneness.

the cornerstone of human empathy (V.S.


Ramachandran et al, 2007). How then? We can
listen with our hearts, and listen with our whole
being, our whole undivided attention and presence.

And what is this “presence”? When we are there


completely for that other person, friend, family
member, lover, sister, brother, or even a stranger.
No judgment; instead, non-judgment. No covering
over the awkward silences with our words; instead,
embracing the silence and holding that space
for others, honoring that and allowing whatever
needs to be said, even unsaid. Offering our pure,
unconditional attention, where we hear and feel
the feelings behind the words, if possible with love,
without any underlying intention.

In that moment of compassion and empathic


listening, the listener can even forget themselves
completely. It is an experience akin to the
dissolution of the ego, of “no self.” Empathic
listening can allow the speaker to release and let
go of so much, easing their emotional burdens
and feel “met,” cherished, human. In doing so, we
remember our beautiful and sometimes bruised
humanity in all its colors of joy and sorrow. Our
oneness.

Au gu s t 2 02 1 23
thought
in action
We discover our
true selves in love.

THOMAS MERTON
The Pandemic of
the Separate Self
PART 2

DAN SIEGEL is a clinical professor of psychiatry at the UCLA


School of Medicine and executive director of the Mindsight
Institute. In part 2 of his interview with UDAY KUMAR, he
speaks about intraconnectedness, alloparenting, presence,
connection, open awareness, and love.

Q: My teacher, Daaji, says that while survival this. So what’s another way to do it?” The book
of the fittest may apply in the overall scheme makes suggestions, not on specific things, but
of survival, human beings evolve only through rather, “What’s a way to be in the world that
cooperation. resonates?”

Totally. We’ve forgotten that. Q: You’re not talking about small fixes here and
there. You’re addressing the question: How do I
Q: Then, you were talking about the sense of conduct my life on this planet itself? This needs
Self, and I remembered that once he said, “If to be rethought. I would love to read it, because
you’re sitting in this room, the walls create the you mention the five pandemics – one of them
impression of space inside and space outside. is about the environment. Many times, people
And if I take away the walls, then what remains? ask the question: How do we live in tune with
It’s just space.” nature? Daaji says that living in tune with nature
is actually resonating with the principles of
Exactly. Just this morning I finished writing a book nature. And he says if that’s the case, if you look
about exactly that topic, called Intraconnected. I at a mango tree or an apple tree, it doesn’t need
think it’s a moment for humanity to take a deep mango juice or apple juice to give you fruits.
breath and say, “Okay, we did it this way, we tried It takes a little water and sunlight, and gives
to make it work, but it’s not going to work like you the best fruit in return. So, one principle

26 H eart f u l n es s
T HOUG HT IN ACTION
THO U GH T I N ACT IO N

in nature is to take the minimum and give the were collaborative. We have something called
maximum. And for human beings, the most “alloparenting,” for example, which means we let
important thing is to accept minimum love and our babies be taken care of by more than just the
give maximum love. mother.

I think it’s a moment of bridging these areas of Q: Sarah Hrdy, right?


science and spirituality. It’s all in the idea of being
in service, and how we can learn from the wisdom Yes, Mothers and Others by Sarah Hrdy.
of ancient teachings and contemplative practices.
Weave it together with this cross-disciplinary view In my new book, Intraconnected, there is the idea
of science, and come to some thoughtful ways that of feeling things from the inside out. And as
collectively we can move forward. We really need your teacher said about the walls, this is actually
to think deeply about the next steps for humanity. learning how to use a lens of identity so that you
can focus the lens close in and say, “Okay I have
Whether you’re a parent raising your children, a a body,” and at the same time focus that lens
teacher in a school, people in the medical world, wide and say, “I can literally see beyond my skin
people running a business, people running a and I am also the tree. I am also the cloud.” And
government or non-profit, there are billions and that’s not just trying to be poetic, it’s trying to say,
billions of people on our planet. So how do we “There’s no reason the skull or the skin should be
actually make a shift where people realize that it’s seen as the final boundaries of you.”
survival of the most cooperative? It’s survival of
the most compassionate. The science that I review Q: It’s going beyond my physical being to my
in the book shows how our origins as a species subtle being, which can be pervasive, and
finding the connection with all things.

One thought I latched on to while you were


I think it’s a moment of talking about parents, which I have seen, is that

bridging these areas of it has been a tough year for families, in general,
just having to do a lot. One of the things that is
science and spirituality. It’s compromised in that process is presence. So,
any thoughts or suggestions on how to regain
all in the idea of being in the presence parents may have lost in the last
year?
service, and how we can
It’s such a great question. I think that presence has
learn from the wisdom of three qualities to it, and each of them contribute
ancient teachings and to this question you’re asking: What do we do as
parents? And presence is a great central feature
contemplative practices. to highlight. Those three are: Connection to your
child, Open Awareness so you’re able to receive

28 H eart f u l n es s
T HOUG HT IN ACTION

from your child, and then you have Love. If you awareness. And they can let the natural, vital force
like acronyms, that spells COAL. of life – love – arise in their being and in their
doing.
In the past, I would talk about the word
“mindfulness,” where COAL was an acronym for So COAL (Connection, Open Awareness, and
“curious, open, accepting, and loving.” This new Love) is what presence is made of – the three
COAL overlaps with that, but it’s “connected, open threads of presence; the tapestry of presence. And
awareness, and love.” Those three things are almost the good news is: If I’m doing something, whatever
like three threads of a singular tapestry of presence. that practice might be, my parenting will be totally
And they’re what’s described when people do different, and my child will develop resilience.
this practice of the “Wheel of Awareness.” It’s One practice is the Wheel of Awareness, where
been really fascinating to watch parents start to the rim is the many things I’m aware of, and the
do the wheel as a practice, as they can become hub represents the experience of awareness itself.
more present. They can feel the deep connection. I need to learn to distinguish the hub from the
They can enter this state of receptivity called open rim, the knowing in the hub from the knowing

Au gu s t 2 02 1 29
THO U GH T I N ACT IO N

One parliamentarian didn’t want to share during


the sharing time, but he spoke with me afterward
When parents bring and said, “You know, I didn’t share during the
sharing time.”
presence, then
I said, “Yeah, I noticed.”
children will And he said, “Do you want to know what my
experience was?”
develop resilience. I said, “Sure.”
And then he started to cry, and said, “When I got
into that hub in the practice, I have never before
felt the experience of being connected to everyone
in the rim, so that when I’m really there for my and everything, and so much love.”
child, I’m coming from the hub. I may have all I said, “Wow, thank you for sharing.”
sorts of thoughts or memories or excitements or He said, “You’re welcome.”
disappointments or expectations or judgments, and And I said, “So, you didn’t want to share that with
all that rim stuff, but when I drop into the hub, your colleagues?”
it’s “Connection, Open Awareness, and Love”– “Oh no, no, no. They would think I was weak if I
COAL. talked about love.”

So I am so happy that you brought up the word Then there was this silence between the two of us.
“presence,” because if you had to summarize I asked, “Well, can I ask you a question?”
the science of attachment and parent-child He goes, “Okay, sure.”
relationships, presence would be the best summary “So, when you’re making federal law, you’re coming
of the whole thing. When parents bring presence, up with the plans for national policy, are you
then children will develop resilience. leaving love out of your reasoning?”
His eyes got really big, and then he ran over to his
My wife wrote this really great book called The colleagues. I don’t know exactly what they said, but
Gift of Presence with “ce,” and it was a joke, because we can only hope that instead of … Imagine what
presents are gifts, right? It’s a mindfulness guide he’s been taught over the years – that love is a sign
for women, although men can read it, too, and of weakness – when, in fact, it’s the deepest sign of
it’s a beautiful example of seeing how to become strength to bring that heartfelt experience of love
present and show up, for life is available to us and collaboration, cooperation, compassion, and
whether we’re parents or not. We can do it with connection to the way you design law, or design a
our neighbors, we can do it with our friends, we company, or the way you are present as a parent.
can do it with our partners, we can do it at work,
and we can do it with government. I was working So this is the moment! The pandemic is inviting
in a parliament in another country and we did the us to let love lead us, let it guide us, to teach from
Wheel of Awareness. that place, to live from that place, to learn from
that place of love. I think if we do that, we can
have a very different way of being on the planet.

30 H eart f u l n es s
T HOUG HT IN ACTION

It’s the deepest sign of strength to bring that


heartfelt experience of love and collaboration,
cooperation, compassion, and connection
to the way you design law, or design a company,
or the way you are present as a parent.

Au gu s t 2 02 1 31
THO U GH T I N ACT IO N

The pandemic is inviting us to let love lead us,


let it guide us, to teach from that place, to live
from that place, to learn from that place of
love. I think if we do that, we can have a very
different way we are on the planet.

Q: I really like this, because what you shared looking beyond and bringing in the quantum
both from a practical standpoint and an field of awareness.
overarching philosophy is: When I stop loving,
the one who suffers the most is me. I have The book called Intraconnected begins and builds
dammed up the river flowing from within me. from that place.

Taking the question of presence a little further, Well, it is an absolute honor to be here with you
and you also spoke about alloparenting, I want and I look forward to continuing our conversation.
to share something with you. My teacher often
speaks about a concept called the Wisdom Q: Thank you so much. My best to your family.
Bridge. He makes the case that we are suffering
from the mass extinction of wisdom in society. Thank you, and us to you, too.

Oh yes.
Illustrations by ANANYA PATEL
Q: His point is that the wisdom bridges
are breaking down between generations.
Grandparents and grandchildren today are
not spending enough time together. Very soon,
we will be at a place where we lose so much
generational wisdom in society that we need to
start rethinking family. We need to start thinking
alloparenting.

Dan, your work is making a big difference. I didn’t


even get into interpersonal neurobiology, and
to me that is real quantum awareness. You’re

32 H eart f u l n es s
JUST THINKING AND FEELING

If You Disagree,
You Are Not
Listening
DR. ICHAK ADIZES explores the art of diffusing a disagreement,
especially when the other party claims that you have not
understood them because you are not listening. He uses the
technique of mirroring to ensure better understanding and
communication.

34 H eart f u l n es s
T HOUG HT IN ACTION

I
t frequently occurs in discussions, when someone After they acknowledge that you do understand
does not agree with you, that he or she will say, them well, make your counterargument. Not before
“No, no, no, no, no. You don’t understand what I they acknowledge that you have understood them.
said. You’re not listening.”
This routine, to deal with a heated emotional
They appear to be claiming that if you disagree argument or discussion, needs strong self-control
with them, it is because you’re not listening well, or of one’s emotions. The claim that you do not
you don’t understand their argument. This is often understand, when you do, can be offensive and stir
not true. You are listening and you understand an emotional response. So be cool. Just listen and
what they’re saying. You just don’t agree. write down their argument, systematize it into its
ingredients, so that when you mirror you are crystal
The other party is intimidating you into agreeing, clear what their argument is, and then respond.
as if he is the genius and you are the idiot who
does not understand their genius. You have to That is what I do, unless I lose my patience
stop that person and say, “I hear you very well. Let listening to someone who non-stop argues that
me repeat what you said and tell me if I missed I cannot understand their argument. They are
anything,” and repeat quietly without allowing not arguing for me to understand them; they are
interruption of the other party’s argument. That arguing to win the debate. To win the debate,
is called mirroring. Now ask the other party to the rules of the game are different from those
validate that you did hear them well and you did of understanding the argument. In this case I
understand their argument well. disengage.

After you have mirrored their argument, what Just thinking and feeling,
often happens in my experience is that they Ichak Kalderon Adizes
understand their own argument better now that
they have heard it from someone else, and they https://www.ichakadizes.com/post/if-you-
will start adding to or changing their argument. disagree-you-are-not-listening

No problem. Repeat the mirroring. It might take


several attempts to really understand them. Illustration by UMA MAHESWARI

Be cool. Just listen and write down their


argument, systematize it into its ingredients,
so that when you mirror you are crystal clear
what their argument is, and then respond.

Au gu s t 2 02 1 35
We all come into the
world with a propensity
for goodness.

RICHARD DAVIDSON
innerview
altered
traits
DR. RICHARD DAVIDSON is a prolific and well-known neuroscientist,
speaker, meditator and author. In March 2021, Richie was interviewed
by THANGAM VENKATESAN, professor of medicine at the Medical
College of Wisconsin and ANAGHA MATAPURKAR, Ph.D. MBA, about his
life’s journey and latest initiatives to bring well-being to humanity.
INNERVIE W

AM: Hi Richie, it’s wonderful serious neuroscientific research So when I met His Holiness in
to meet you. I have been very on meditation, which at that 1992, it was very clear to me that
inspired and fascinated by your time really didn’t exist. I met him I needed to come out of the closet
journey as a meditator and at his residence in Dharamsala, and be much more public about
author, and the astounding and it was a pivotal meeting. Up my own practice. It was a really
body of work that you have as a until that point in my career, I pivotal time, yes.
researcher. had been doing a lot of research
on the brain and emotions, and TV: In the Gastroenterology
Thank you. I was focusing mostly on the Department they think I am a
negative side of things. I studied little cuckoo, as I am a meditator.
TV: I completely echo Anagha’s the brain mechanisms underlying They just kind of accept it.
sentiments, and your book vulnerability to depression,
Altered Traits is the first book anxiety and stress. His Holiness Keep cuckoo, it’s good. It’s very
I have read twice! It is really challenged me. He said, “Why healthy.
amazing. So, Richie, can you can’t you use the same tools of
share some key aspects of your neuroscience to study kindness and TV: Yes. So, talking about
journey? Something that I find compassion?” I did not have a very positive emotions, I know you
particularly interesting is your good answer for him, and it was a are the founder of the Center
interaction with the Dalai Lama. turning point. for Healthy Minds. Can you tell
How did you first meet him? Can us a little bit about its overall
you describe that inflection point At that time I had been a mission? What are the services it
for you as a person, a meditator meditation practitioner for offers?
and a researcher? decades. I went on my first
meditation retreat in 1974 with The Center for Healthy Minds
Thank you for asking. I first met Goenka when I was a graduate was founded and inaugurated by
His Holiness in 1992 in India student. That was my first visit to the Dalai Lama in 2010, so we
and he learned about my interest India. Most of my professional have been in existence for a little
in meditation, and also that I colleagues at that time did not more than ten years. The mission
was a neuroscientist. He was know of my interest in meditation, of our center is to cultivate well-
really interested in encouraging as I really kept it under the radar. being and relieve suffering through

Au gu s t 2 02 1 39
INNER V I EW

a scientific understanding of the


mind. And our vision is a kinder,
wiser and more compassionate
world. It is primarily an
interdisciplinary research center,
with faculty from many different
departments. Currently, we have
around 75 people working in the
center in one capacity or another.

About four years ago, I founded


an affiliated non-profit company
called Healthy Minds Innovations,
with a mission to take the insights
from the science and turn them
into tools that can be used to
cultivate and measure well-being.
So, the non-profit is much more
externally focused, and it is really
to get the insights out into the
world in one way or another. The
non-profit is located in the same TV: That’s great. I know we all does show that we all come into
university building as the Center talk about well-being, but we the world with a propensity for
for Healthy Minds, Madison, seem to live in a cocoon. When goodness. Young infants exhibit
Wisconsin. We have an agreement we look outside, we live in this that propensity, and more than
with the university, and there are highly polarized world. We seem 95% of six-month-old babies show
about 20 people working for the to be caught up in these currents prosocial orientation. So, it is very
non-profit. of social, cultural, and racial clear that this is how we come into
problems, the pandemic and so the world.
TV: I did review your website and on. You have referred to innate
there are some nice tools that human goodness several times. The fact today we see so much
people can use. How do we cultivate this innate conflict, difficulties between
human goodness in people? How in-groups and out-groups, and
Yes, and we have an App that is do we all come back together? inequalities, is really a product of
freely available throughout the learning. This happens through
world, and it is based on our It’s a great question and I like forces in our culture, which,
framework for cultivating well- the way you’re phrasing it. So, unfortunately, promote this kind of
being. the scientific evidence really conflict, dichotomy, and suffering.

40 H eart f u l n es s
INNERVIE W

The invitation in all this is that we authentic way to be. And so, one
can use the same mechanisms in of the things that we are trying
Our true nature is
our brain and our body, that have to do is to promote strategies to
basic goodness,
been hijacked by the media and cultivate these qualities in different
the cultural artifacts around us, sectors of society, in the education and when people
which promote these unfortunate sector at many different levels, in
views. We can train our mind to the workplace, in the healthcare resonate with that,
return to our true nature. Our true sector. All of these different sectors
nature is basic goodness, and when are ripe for this kind of training, when they get back
people resonate with that, when and I think that one of the things
they get back in tune with that, the pandemic has done is - it has
in tune with that,
they feel it. It’s palpable and it is exposed this in a stark way, the fact they feel it. It’s
recognizable. that the trajectory that we were
on is not a particularly healthier, palpable and it is
It is something that is enjoyable, sustainable one. And so, we need
and they can sense that it is a very to come back to our senses, we recognizable.

Au gu s t 2 02 1 41
INNER V I EW

need to come back to our nature We are trying to do that in


and so we're doing everything we the systems we work with. For
possibly can to get this out into example, we are doing a lot of
different sectors in the world. work in the Madison public school
system, as well as in other school
TV: That’s great. And then, alter systems including those outside
traits, right? the USA. And when more and
more people are committed to
Exactly, alter traits. Through that doing these practices, it then takes
we can change the world. on a sense of the collective and the
I think that there is entire organization really begins to
TV: That’s fantastic. embody this change. It can be very,
power in the very helpful.
AM: So building on this, I’m
collective. There’s wondering if you have any AM: You refer to the deep
thoughts on the power of the and wide paths in your book,
power in groups of collective efforts of various Altered Traits, and it seems

people engaging in meditation practices coming like only a small minority, who
together for a common cause. are already invested in some
these practices. Have you studied or plan to form of self-improvement or
study this in the future? self-transformation, seek such
Doing it with others practices. And well-being is
I think a lot depends on exactly a skill as you say. So how do
can be enormously what you are referring to with you propose to encourage
collective efforts. Certainly, I contemplative practices in a
helpful in think that there is power in the real-world setting, like you just

supporting our collective. There’s power in groups talked about?


of people engaging in these
practice. practices. Doing it with others That’s a really important question.
can be enormously helpful in The way we promote it, first of all,
supporting our practice. In the is by encouraging people to take
Buddhist view, we have the sangha, small realistic steps to do this. The
which is the community, and it second thing is in our App – you
is the group that supports us in can engage in practices that are
the practice. And so, to the extent not formal meditation, but that are
that we can encourage groups done during the activities of daily
to take this on, I think it can be living. You don’t have to be sitting
enormously valuable. still. You can be walking, you can

42 H eart f u l n es s
INNERVIE W

Ph ot o by TOA H EF TIB A
be commuting, you can be washing minutes of practice a week. It is most people would agree that our
the dishes, or you can be doing through this gradual step-by-step minds are even more important
your laundry. You can be engaged approach that I think people can than our teeth, yet most people
in any of these activities of daily incorporate this into their life. don’t even take the small amount
living and also engage in practice of time they spend brushing their
in the background. We find this One of the things I frequently teeth to nurture their minds. This
very, very valuable, and we have remind people is that when human is really a message that we want to
demonstrated that it doesn’t take beings first evolved none of us convey to the world.
much to begin to change. were brushing our teeth. Yet, today,
virtually everyone on the planet AM: Commuting and meditating
You can start with just five brushes their teeth. When you is certainly something I can
minutes a day, and that can reflect on that, it’s not part of our relate to, because I live in
actually produce discernible, genome. It’s something we’ve all the city and have to take the
measurable change after just one learned to do, because it is good subway. That’s how I cope with
week. That’s a little more than 30 for our physical hygiene. I think the commuting – by meditating.

Au gu s t 2 02 1 43
INNER V I EW

Ph ot o by B RI T TA NI B U RNS
Our last question is regarding Second, along with this, we need we’re seeing the benefits to
your personal journey and to develop better measures of the students. So, this is a very
research, which we find well-being. You can’t really change strategic and cost-efficient way to
remarkable to say the least. something unless you can measure benefit large numbers of students
What do you envision next? the change that you are promoting without having to work with
and measure sensitively. And we each individual student. This is
Well, whenever we are with the don’t have great measures that we something we are exploring in
Dalai Lama, he reminds us that can deploy on a large scale. This different parts of the world.
there are seven billion people, and is something we are working on
we need to do everything we can intensively. AM: That’s wonderful.
to figure out strategies to scale
these practices to nurture the Then, we’re doing a lot of work TV: Thank you again for chatting
minds and hearts of everyone. This internationally. We have a large with us. It was really a pleasure.
is one of the reasons we developed collaborative effort in Mexico, We will send you our research on
the App, and we’re making it where we are training a group the effects of Heartfulness, and
freely available to remove any of schoolteachers and principals, we hope to meet you in person
kind of financial barrier so that and examining the impact of soon.
anyone, anywhere, can use it. training the staff on the students.
We are developing different We have recently worked with That would be great. I’d be happy
versions of this App for different 1100 principals and teachers to. As soon as we can easily travel
communities; more specialized in elementary schools, who again, we’d love to have you visit
content for college students, are responsible for teaching our center.
teachers, for example. around 250,000 students, and

44 H eart f u l n es s
it changes everything

What is this
“we” of ours?
It is our heart.

LALAJI
PART 3

TOBIN HART is a humanistic transpersonal psychologist, professor in


the University of West Georgia’s Humanistic, Transpersonal and Critical
Psychology program, and co-founder of the ChildSpirit Institute. In the
final part of this series, in which he is interviewed by VICTOR KANNAN,
Director of the Heartfulness Institute USA, Tobin speaks about the
intersection of western psychology and spirituality, in particular the
importance of presence, imagination, wisdom, love, compassion, purity,
and overcoming spiritual bypassing.

48 H eart f u l n es s
IT CHA NGES EV ERY THING

Q: When you talk about possibility, would Q: Wisdom is also a bridge between perhaps
faith be part of wisdom? the known and the unknown at this point in
time, in a way that they seem to share in the
Yes, in this sense my favorite definition of faith is quality of each other.
a suspension of disbelief. So, rather than believe in
something, there is another important quality or Yes, absolutely. Really, I think with all the things
capacity we call imagination. One of the powerful we are talking about, if you go deep enough
allies for wisdom and possibility is imagination. into any one of them it opens to all the others.
Can we conceive of another way? And can we act Wisdom involves some other things too. It
“as if ” for a bit? Can we hold open possibility for involves cultivating clarity and seeking guidance.
long enough? Imagination is a bridge between the Different capacities serve us. For example, how do
known and the unknown. From psychology, we we find wise guides? From our interiority, from our
know our minds are so powerfully conditioned to inspiration, from a dialogue with a good book, with
see things, to perceive in a way, and to believe in a our children, with our loved ones in general, and,
way. If we can imagine another way, suddenly we ultimately, with any circumstance, we’re looking for
can free ourselves. That’s also part of what I think signs.
wisdom is about – to free ourselves.
The indigenous cultures often read signs, such
Q: So faith is also a bridge between the as the flight of a bird or something that crosses
known and the unknown. our path. It’s fascinating to say, “Wow, okay, what
does that do for me? Why does it resonate?”
Exactly. Yes. Rather than making any ontological claims about
somebody sending this bird to me, it’s instead,
Q: So imagination is the bridge between the “What is that about? What does it trigger or
known and the unknown. open? How can I dialogue with this? What does it
make me think of ?” So we’re always available for
Yes. guidance, and it’s always available to us.

Au gu s t 2 02 1 49
IT CH AN G ES EVE RY TH I NG

Q: And that is not possible if we are not You’re referring to the instrument we made. It’s
present. In the wisdom category, you talk just a series of questions to ask yourself. It’s for
about discernment, and also about the self-reflection when folks look for help, direction
child’s ability to directly perceive things. and guidance to develop their psycho-spiritual
potential. I think it’s very difficult to do the
Exactly. spiritual life without simultaneously doing the
psychological, and the psychological without
Q: In your book, you mention a tool called the spiritual. SAM was designed to give a self-
SAM, the Spirituality Assessment Matrix. assessment about what your strengths are already,
So, if I were to say to myself, “Hey, I want to and what might be some specific trailheads for
become wiser, I want to be able to perceive growth.
things better,” then what type of assessment
should I give myself?

50 H eart f u l n es s
IT CHA NGES EV ERY THING

For example, you might discover that you have more particularly, self-assertion. Practicing when
this incredibly big heart, compassion and empathy, to say no, and when to say yes, and when to be
but you may not have a strong capacity for, say, particular in what and how to give. For example,
discernment. Another person might have a lot of rather than giving cash to someone who has
presence, being really aware and awake, and yet trouble with drugs, you give meals instead. That’s
not have what is the fourth direction – they have where the heart really joins with wisdom so that
not found their voice. They haven’t yet found their we can serve one another.
creative expression in the world.
Q: You’re talking about a different dimension
Maybe your capacity for love and compassion of all this working together, right? For
overrides any discernment. So anytime you example, we can be compassionate, but
see something or someone in need, you give to if we don’t have joy, we reach empathy-
them automatically but end up feeling drained, fatigue. If we are compassionate but don’t
sometimes even like a doormat. You might justify have wisdom, then we don’t know when to
it further by saying, “Well, what I’ve given hasn’t stop, or how much to give, or what to give?
helped, but at least I’ve given it to them.” You may
even feel like a martyr in some way, suffering as I feel it all works together, and that leads me
you give. Yet, I would argue that to give without a to the idea of evolution of consciousness.
very organic joy is problematic. It misses the point At the end of the day, all these elements of
really. I think when folks give freely from their love, wisdom etc., are in the consciousness
hearts, there is this incredible expansion, and the of a person. The joy you speak about is when
whole world is enriched by it. So, in this particular the evolution of consciousness, expansion of
case, it might be that one needs to practice or consciousness, and purity of consciousness
develop the capacity for discernment, maybe even reach a level where joy is possible.

How do we find wise guides? From our interiority,


from our inspiration, from a dialogue with a good
book, with our children, with our loved ones in
general, and, ultimately, with any circumstance,
we’re looking for signs.

Au gu s t 2 02 1 51
When I think about purity of consciousness, I It’s about owning those parts of ourselves that we
think that this is the notion of oneness; ultimately, don’t want to see.
things are all one. The notion of maya alludes
to this. At this level of perception or awareness, William James says that the things we value most
things are illusory in relation to the ultimate, are at the mercy of the things we value least. That’s
where there is oneness of all things. That’s what I particularly true about ourselves, right? So, that’s
think of when I think of purity of consciousness. where this trick is. I think we’re limited, but let’s
accept that, and see how we engage with and move
The evolution of consciousness is tricky, because through it rather than deny and bypass. This is our
one could argue that consciousness doesn’t evolve. work towards expanding consciousness.
It’s just what it is, always. It’s pure. So, in my mind,
the idea of evolution of consciousness is about how Spiritual bypassing is a real problem with earnest
each of us, as individuals, and as a community of and honest spiritual seekers. That’s why the
humanity, can really develop our presence, our love, psychological and the spiritual have to go together
our wisdom, and our creativity, in order to come every step of the way. To move spiritually, you have
closer to that greater mystery. to work through, or in some way disentangle, the
psychological structures that have kept you at a
I think that’s what we’re about in our own very, certain level. For example, we see great spiritual
very particular ways. Sometimes it can be tricky, guides, people who really are remarkable in many
because it’s easy for folks who are very earnest and respects, who are also abusing people. They haven’t
very advanced to do spiritual by passing. That is, done sufficient psychological work. On the other
they take that ultimate perspective of oneness and hand, we know lots of people who are brilliant
dismiss the reality of their personhood, the need intellectually and great personalities, but in some
for differentiation and discernment. way don’t have the spiritual capacity or vision to
really have the fullness of potential.
The sentiment might be, “If all is oneness, then I
need to love everything. So let me treat everything Q: I want to go a little bit deeper into
accordingly.” Yet the reality is that there’s some spiritual bypassing. I think this has been
things that you don’t love. So there’s denial, introduced through different terminologies.
there’s repression. What we know is this: What For example, in Heartfulness, the first Guide
we resist will persist, and it will come back to says that we have not even taken the first
haunt us. It’s what Carl Jung talked about as the step in spirituality until we have improved
shadow. Jung talked about the whole process our character. He makes a big distinction
of individuation. The process of evolution of between character formation and spiritual
individual consciousness is about “shadow work.” achievement. To me, it is spiritual bypassing

52 H eart f u l n es s
if you are not focusing on improving your
character.

Can you talk a little bit more about this,


maybe giving one or two examples? That
way, people can really understand that the
very spiritual practice they are doing can be
counterproductive if they do not increase
their level of awareness of some of those
When I think about purity of
shadows or blind spots.
consciousness, I think that
Yes, sure. There is a simple everyday one, and that
is practicing to be fully loving. Imagine you go to this is the notion of oneness;
pick up your car from a repair shop. You’re having
a muffler replaced, and they quoted you $60 but it ultimately, things are all one.
turns out to be $600.
The notion of maya alludes
You decide, “Boy, this person must need the to this. At this level of
money more than I do. From a heartful place I’m
just going to give it to them.” And yet, there’s perception or awareness,
another part of you that says, “I think I’ve just been
swindled. I think I’ve just been cheated,” but you things are illusory in relation
make a decision not to address that. You swallow
it. Rather than being assertive (not aggressive) and to the ultimate, where there
saying, “Look, you told me this. We had a contract,
and you didn’t call me to tell me that something
is oneness of all things.
changed with the contract.”

That’s human life. If you’re conflict avoidant, which


a lot of us are, particularly if we’re trying to be in
our heart, this will just rile you up. You may wake
up at night with it, but rationalize to yourself that,
“No, I did the right thing.” This is a very simple
example, but it’s at that level that the tension of

Au gu s t 2 02 1 53
IT CH AN G ES EVE RY TH I NG

In my mind, the idea of evolution of


consciousness is about how each of us,
as individuals, and as a community of humanity,
can really develop our presence, our love,
our wisdom, and our creativity, in order to come
closer to that greater mystery.

54 H eart f u l n es s
IT CHA NGES EV ERY THING

the spiritual and the psychological is manifested The next stage, as a question, is: “What am I
day in and day out. to do?” That might mean, “How do I need to
readjust my life and redirect my efforts in light
Another category of spiritual bypassing comes of what I now know?”
when we might have had some experience, some
powerful awakening of sorts. So, we’ve had some The last step takes the integration still further:
ecstasy, some vision, or some profound sense of “How am I to be? What is the life that flows
love, and we really seek to be with that, to live with from and through this?” We could say this has
that. Yet spiritual experiences can also be a trap. more to do with being than doing.
We become so attached to them that everything
else falls to the wayside. People then pursue the Q: So what’s the end goal of all this? What’s
experience, seeking another high, essentially, and the ultimate purpose of life and living,
it becomes an addiction. Rather than the profound walking and exercising? Another way to put
event being a source of development and growth, it is: How do we derive meaning from all
it now actually becomes an anchor that holds us these activities and aspirations?
back. We may become fixated rather than curious,
and this is keeping us from being present in any Well, I think the point of life is to live it. Pretty
situation. Also, the ego may assume that this simple. And I do like that it’s a mystery. How
special moment means that we’re special and do we engage the mystery in a way that feels
fuel ego-inflation, which works against spiritual fulfilling? I think that we basically have some
growth. internal felt sense, a barometer or an invisible
hand on our shoulder, and it’s directing us in some
There are other sorts of issues when we have way. I don’t know how it works. I think we’ll leave
experiences. I think there are three general steps that as a mystery. But I do think that we have this
we might go through: opportunity of our life in the Earth school. The
job is to do a couple things, that is, to see what it
In terms of overarching questions, the first is that is ours to give and what it is ours to learn.
step is, “What happened? What does this In some ways, I would say that’s the definition of a
mean?” whether it’s a near death experience, calling.
or a great moment in meditation, or whatever.
So, we’re trying to figure it out, to ground it in Q: In Heartfulness we say that we are
understanding and meaning so that we can get connected with the Source. It’s even a logical
our bearings. hypothesis, because we all have come

Au gu s t 2 02 1 55
marching the trail of reality, where whatever
you see is real and authentic. Then you
become more and more one with it.

I’m going to send you a book called The


Heartfulness Way, written by Daaji, our
Guide, where he tries to explain everything
as rationally as possible. But at the same
time, there is only so much that the rational
mind can grasp. It is in keeping with the
wonder, the curiosity and the observation
out there that we extend our knowledge
from what we can know logically to what we
can know with wonder.

I’ve recently read some of Daaji’s writings


and really appreciate them. His writings are
beautifully coherent and down-to-earth. It is
very contemporary, not as in trends, not even
as a translation, but as a very sane and spiritual
depiction relevant for today. I feel the kinship.

from some place, so there is a source for Q: You want to share anything else, Tobin?
everything – not only the source of creation,
but also the source of sustenance, and so I’ve appreciated your incisive and big questions.
on. So, if we are part of that which is created It’s been nice to talk with somebody who’s really
and is being sustained, then there is a knowledgeable and smart about it.
connection to the Source.
Q: Thank you, Tobin. I hope this conversation
So the hypothesis is about how I establish a further adds to our understanding of
connection with the Source and what does psychology and spirituality as a whole study
it mean? How does it feel, and what does of humanity. Thank you so very much.
the journey look like? One idea in terms of
the purpose of life, or meaning of life, is
basically to be cognizant of this connection
and the nature of our journey towards
the Source. What are the benefits of that
journey, the progressive, feel-good aspect,
in a very tangible way, in a real way, not in
an assumed way? In a way where you’re

56 H eart f u l n es s
VEENA MISHRA shares her
experience of learning to
listen to the voice of the
heart through a meditation
practice. She describes
meditation as the way
she learned to allow the
heart to speak out – “that
magical tool we are all
unknowingly looking for.”

E
verything has a tendency
to age and decay with time.
The outer glamor of this
so-called “perfect world” continues
to fade slowly but steadily with
each passing day. What we often
do not realize is that, amid all this
pomp and show, our tiny hearts
are trying to speak to us. The
noise around us is so clamorous, very simple yet effective way in any kind of situation, this voice
however, that the heart’s voice is of achieving this. Meditation is always trying to tell me the right
drowned even before it can surface. is that magical tool we are all thing to do. Whether I am able to
unknowingly looking for. It listen to it or not depends on how
Our heart is the most beautiful enables us to lend our ear to the much I have been able to detune
creation. This inner heart of voice within that is trying to speak myself from the other unwanted
ours is not subject to any kind to us. As we meditate, the outer noises, which are a culmination of
of disintegration. What it needs cacophony begins to die out and desires and ego. Meditation helps
is nourishment. If the heart is that voice becomes prominent. to refine these and lessen their
properly nourished and taken impact on my thinking, enabling
care of, then over time, as the We often wonder how to me to know my heart’s wish.
body shrivels, the heart continues discriminate between the voice
to shine, radiate love and, most of the heart and the so-called Whether we listen to it or not
importantly, guide us through life. voice of the mind. When I began depends on us.
meditation, I started to realize that
How do we nourish our hearts? there is only one voice, and it is
I think that meditation is a that of the heart. When caught up Illustration by ARATI SHEDDE

Au gu s t 2 02 1 57
be inspired
The only journey
is the one within.

RAINER MARIA RILKE


Contentment
THE ART OF REMOVING AND CREATING HABITS
PART 8
DAAJI continues his series on refining habits, in the light of Patanjali’s Ashtanga
Yoga and current scientific and yogic principles and practices. Last month, he
explored the first Niyama of purity, shaucha. This month he shares his insights on
that pivotal human quality – contentment, which is known in Yoga as santosh.
B E INSPIRE D

Our quest for happiness I hear the same stories from my Western friends,
who tell me about their grandparents and parents

C
ontentment, happiness, well-being … living through the First World War, the Great
these have been considered hallmarks of Depression, and the Second World War, who also
a good life for people from all cultures seemed to have a higher level of contentment than
since time immemorial. Yet, in today’s uncertain many people today. They made do with very little
world, they seem to elude us more than ever before. when resources were scarce, they appreciated so
When I remember my grandparents, who were many of the very ordinary things in daily life, like
simple village folk from Gujarat in India, they had wartime rations, a beautiful sunrise, a homemade
very little in the way of material possessions, and Christmas present, and letters from loved ones at
they lived through tough times at the end of the home or on the battlefield. They made something
British rule and India’s independence, but they had of their lives despite the hardships they endured.
a higher level of contentment than most wealthy An amazing and inspiring example is the 1997
people living luxurious lives today. In my memories film, Life is Beautiful, about a Jewish-Italian
I still see their simple life, their smiles, their way of bookstore owner whose family was captured by the
being with family members, and the fundamental Nazis and interned, and who managed to shield his
principles that defined their lifestyle. These young son from the horrors of concentration camp
principles brought them a lot of stability, and they living with humor and hope.
are the lifestyle habits that we are discussing in
this series.

Contentment arises when we are in contact with


the soul. It is vital to understand this point:
contentment does not come from the body or the
mind. It emanates from the soul, as the layers of
conditioning dissolve.

Au gu s t 2 02 1 61
BE I N SP I R ED

A striking modern-day example happened at a Also, contentment arises when we are in contact
Heartfulness Youth Conference in Nairobi, Kenya, with the soul. It is vital to understand this point:
in 2018. Those who attended were all graduates contentment does not come from the body or the
of the CAP Youth Empowerment initiative for mind. It emanates from the soul, as the layers of
disadvantaged youth, and many did not know conditioning dissolve.
where their next meal was coming from or when
they would find employment. Their stories were In this article, we will explore some of the practices
difficult by most people’s standards, yet they that help us to experience that connection. But
exuded such life and joy that our team was brought first, let’s explore the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali,
to tears. Their openness and heartfelt participation the ancient patriarch of Yoga. These Sutras were
were appreciated by all who attended. written thousands of years ago and are still so
relevant today. What does he say about this second
So we can easily see that a person’s level of Niyama of contentment?
contentment is not necessarily related to their
circumstances. Instead, it is directly related to
their inner state – their level of acceptance, or
alternatively, their level of expectation and desire.

62 H eart f u l n es s
B E INSPIRE D

Purity a Contentment a Happiness

First, Patanjali says that contentment arises


out of purity, the first Niyama. He defines four
qualities that arise out of purity, and the first
is contentment. How does this happen? When
we remove all the impurities, complexities and
heaviness in our system that form coverings around
the soul, we purify our field of consciousness,
allowing us to focus inward and connect with
the soul. It is here that we experience true inner
contentment. A truly happy person is
Second, Patanjali says that extraordinary happiness happy under all
results from quiet contentment. So purity leads
to contentment, which in turn leads to happiness.
circumstances – external
This extraordinary happiness is an inner state – it things and people may
has nothing to do with the pleasures and pains of
worldly existence, which are fickle, coming and bring temporary happiness,
going like the weather.
which is important in day-
If you ask yourself, “What brings me happiness
and contentment?”, it may be your relationships to-day life, but they do not
with loved ones, your career, or a comfortable
lifestyle. But even if you have all of these things,
ensure lasting happiness,
will you truly be happy without inner peace and because when they are
calm? If you also ask yourself, “How will I feel if
my circumstances change?”, you may discover that gone happiness also
your happiness is dependent on external events
and circumstances. When situations change for the disappears.
worse, like has happened to many with the Covid
pandemic, will you still feel so happy?

A truly happy person is happy under all


circumstances – external things and people may
bring temporary happiness, which is important
in day-to-day life, but they do not ensure lasting
happiness, because when they are gone happiness

Au gu s t 2 02 1 63
BE IN SP I R ED

Without desires, we don’t expect anything.


When we don’t expect anything, we are not
disappointed. Otherwise, disappointment leads
to anger; anger leads to loss of equilibrium; loss
of equilibrium leads to fear, and eventually we
lose our humanity.

also disappears. So, how do we create something In other words, our happiness is inversely related
more enduring? How do we train ourselves to be to the number of desires we have multiplied by the
happy no matter what is going on in our lives? intensity of each of them. Considering the number:
That is the promise of Yoga – to find the source of if we have ten desires and five are fulfilled, then we
lasting contentment by diving to the Center of our have fifty per cent happiness; if ten are fulfilled, we
being. Osho explains it like this: “Contentment have 100 per cent happiness. The more desires we
is the discipline of the yogi. Nothing can take us have, the harder it will be to fulfill them all, so the
away from the Center.” less happy we will be. Considering the intensity:
we may have only a few desires but if they are very
I have often shared the German philosopher intense we won’t rest until they are fulfilled.
Schopenhauer’s reflections about happiness,
starting with his rhetorical question, “How can we What happens when we have no desires at all?
determine whether a man is happy or unhappy?” The denominator becomes zero. Anything divided
He answers it by saying that true happiness is the by zero is indeterminate, so happiness is limitless.
complete satisfaction of all desires. Without desires, we don’t expect anything. When
we don’t expect anything, we are not disappointed.
Mathematically it would look something like this: Otherwise, disappointment leads to anger; anger
leads to loss of equilibrium; loss of equilibrium
Number of desires fulfilled leads to fear, and eventually we lose our humanity.
Happiness = ------------------------------------
∑ (Desiren x Intensity of desiren)

64 H eart f u l n es s
B E INS PIRE D

Practices that bring contentment and


happiness daily practice of Cleaning. Our desires often have
a subconscious root that we cannot remove at the
How can we remove our attachment to desires conscious level. Cleaning removes the subconscious
so that we can create this inner acceptance and root.
contentment? In Heartfulness it happens naturally
as the result of a set of complementary practices: Prayer: At bedtime we open the heart, connect
with the Center, and acknowledge the barrier
Meditation: With practice, we learn to ignore the caused by our wishes and desires. We accept help
pull of thoughts during Meditation. They no longer to remove those wishes instead of trying to remove
distract us. We develop mastery over the thinking them with our limited ego-consciousness.
process. As we dive deeper into the heart during
Meditation, we are also able to ignore the pull of Ten Universal Principles: I have written about
emotions and feelings in the heart. We learn to these principles in a series called “A User’s Guide
pause before reacting to life’s ups and downs. We to Living.” They contain those spiritual secrets
are comfortable in stillness and space. Transmission that have come from the study of Nature, and are
provides the catalyst for this to happen. revealed by means of direct perception.

Cleaning: We remove the underlying vibrational Constant Remembrance: We absorb the inner
impressions (samskaras) that provide the hooks for condition experienced during meditation each
our desires in our subconscious minds through the morning, and allow it to deepen throughout the

Au gu s t 2 02 1 65
BE IN SP I R ED

day. This naturally leads to remembering our inner


connection with the Center. Part of our attention
We absorb the inner
remains focused inward, and part is focused condition experienced
outward in order to complete our daily activities.
When this state becomes a constant flow, it is during meditation each
known as constant remembrance, and this prevents
the formation of impressions. The state of purity of morning, and allow it to
our consciousness is maintained.
deepen throughout the
We then feel contented under all circumstances
day. This naturally leads
and at peace with ourselves. We have found the
ultimate happiness. to remembering our inner
Emotions and desires
connection with the
Center.
Is it really possible to lead a life without any
desires? I don’t believe so. All of us have desires
and aspirations. To be interested in life, to excel at of constant remembrance, then true happiness
whatever we do, is natural and healthy. It is how naturally emerges on its own, even when we face
we associate our emotions with those desires that worldly disappointments. We remain centered. We
makes the difference. How do we solve the riddle invite these states of Samadhi every day and make
of living with desires without letting them pull us them permanent. That is the Heartfulness way.
off course? There is no easy answer, but a state of
inner contentment prevails in us when we do the
above Heartfulness practices. We develop a level The heart is our reference
of emotional maturity, and we become interested
in higher goals, so that our desires become The heart is a barometer of how we feel about
aspirational instead of focusing on the pulls and everything, including ourselves – how we feel
pushes of worldly entanglements. We learn to about our thoughts, emotions, behavior, and
be totally immersed in whatever we are doing, in the choices we make. When we are happy and
the present, without ego, pride or arrogance, and balanced, generally the heart does not say much.
this also results in joy and contentment as we do When we choose well, the heart is a silent
our very best, with interest, with an attitude of witness to the decisions we make. There is natural
continuous improvement, seeing any failures as contentment. And when we are not happy with
stepping stones on the path of evolution. ourselves, the heart becomes restless, alerting
us that something needs to change. We learn to
And when we experience the state of absolute listen to the heart and let it guide us. We remain
balance during meditation, the Samadhi state, and contented even when we are uncomfortable with
it radiates out into all our other activities as a result the change it is demanding of us, because we feel

66 H eart f u l n es s
B E IN SPIRE D

integrated, whole, and at peace with ourselves – we and desire is negative. At one level that is useful,
are evolving. There is contentment in the struggle because desires for worldly things entangle us and
to grow. create emotional disturbance. But as this chakra
is purified through practice, we lose interest in
The Heart Region is the region of the human the pulls and pushes of those desires that take
chakra system that is associated with the dualities us away from our purpose, and realize that the
of everyday life. There are five chakras in this energy of desire can be aspirational; both ends
region, and every one of them has a specific of the spectrum have an evolutionary purpose.
spectrum of emotions. The first chakra is in the Desire in its purest form is the craving for the
lower left part of the chest where the physical highest state, and it keeps our focus on that
heart is found. The spectrum of emotions at this goal. Contentment brings peace and unwavering
chakra is the duality of desire versus contentment. stability in spiritual practice, as well as poise and
At first it may seem that contentment is positive patience in worldly life.

Chakra 5
Air

Chakra 4 Chakra 3
Water Fire

Chakra 2 Chakra 1
Soul Heart, Earth

The Chakras of the Heart Region

Au gu s t 2 02 1 67
BE IN SP I R ED

With Cleaning, we remove the emotional go. In fact, the primates are probably wiser than us,
attachments associated with our worldly desires as they eventually do let go.
that keep us entangled in the matrix. How can
we understand the way we hold onto these When we learn to live in the present, we are living
entanglements? Here is an analogy. Recently, I read in reality, the essence of the Divine. That is why, in
an article about primate mothers who continue the Bhagavad Gita, Lord Krishna says, “Kālo ’smi,”
to carry and groom their babies after they die. meaning “I am time.” He’s not talking of the past
Research from the University College London has or the future. When we dwell in the emotions of
shown that baboon mothers carry their dead babies the past, or the hope for the future, we are living
for up to ten days, while chimpanzee and Japanese a life of unreality. We are moving away from
macaque mothers have been observed carrying Godliness, Paramatma. And where will we find
their dead infants for even longer – sometimes up contentment if we are not centered in our essence?
to a month. They let go of them only when they are
decomposing. Even the fathers protect and groom With Prayer, Meditation and introspection, we go
the dead infants. deeper into the feelings and consciousness of the
heart, so that our emotions become less reactive,
Similarly, when we hold onto our desires and subtler. Eventually, we master the spectrum of
expectations, they are all played out in the hope desire and contentment associated with the first
for a better future. This hoping things will happen chakra, and we thus integrate both craving for the
makes us carry our expectations around like goal and contentment – movement and stillness go
primates carry their dead babies. The expectations together.
remain hooked to our minds, and we don’t let them

Desire in its purest form is the craving


for the highest state, and it keeps our
focus on that goal. Contentment brings
peace and unwavering stability in
spiritual practice, as well as poise and
patience in worldly life.

68 H eart f u l n es s
B E IN SPIRE D

Contentment brings neutrality


in the subconscious, and when we are able to let
go of those impressions and be in the moment,
Contentment is how we feel when there is established in presence, awareness, consciousness
complete and natural acceptance of whatever is and desirelessness, we are in a state of total
happening. The present moment is exactly as it is. acceptance without expectation.
This does not mean that we don’t want things to
change. Contentment is the first step – it gives us This level of contentment is the natural state of
the neutral starting point of acceptance from which a yogi. The more contented the yogi, the more
to move forward, which may include initiating peace and happiness they will radiate to others.
change if required. In that moment, however, we Contentment is infectious, just as misery is
are simply present. Eternity is encapsulated in that infectious, and it radiates from the inner state,
instant in time, and we are centered in the Infinite. creating an atmosphere. As more and more of us
The past cannot return. Only the impressions and radiate inner contentment, the atmosphere we will
memory remain in our subtle body, programmed create will transform humanity.

Au gu s t 2 02 1 69
BE IN SP I R ED

Self-awareness leads to awareness of others;


self-compassion leads to compassion for others;
self-acceptance leads to acceptance of others;
inner enlightenment provides the light for others;
and true Self-love is universal love.

Contentment gets us to first base

The first chakra of the Heart is the starting point


of our inner journey, and mastery over this chakra
leads to the first stage of contentment. To attain
this, we practice. Some people consider meditative
practices to be self-centered, but without them,
how would we develop ourselves so that we
can become effective enough to serve others?
Self-awareness leads to awareness of others;
self-compassion leads to compassion for others;
self-acceptance leads to acceptance of others; inner
enlightenment provides the light for others; and
true Self-love is universal love.

And all this arises out of purity – when we


remove the filters that distort our awareness and
perception, we see the reality of things. It is such
a simple approach, and it this simplicity that takes
us to the Center of our being. At the Center we
find true contentment, as well as oneness with all
creation, and the real purpose of human existence.

70 H eart f u l n es s
Somehow, in the process of trying to deny that
things are always changing, we lose our sense of
the sacredness of life. We tend to forget that we
are part of the natural scheme of things.

PEMA CHÖDRÖN

taste of life
SEASONS OF T H E SACRED

LLEWELLYN VAUGHAN-LEE reminds us of the ever-present cycles of


Nature, and with them an understanding of time and the sense of
sacredness that comes with being in tune with all that is natural.
He reminds us that time is essential to life, and thus important to
honor in our day-to-day life, instead of the rushing and disconnection
associated with our modern-day urban lifestyle.

74 H eart f u l n es s
TA S T E OF LIFE

T
he sacred is an essential quality to life. It We each carry this primal knowing within our
connects us to our own soul and to the consciousness, even if we have forgotten it.
Divine that is the source of all that exists. A relationship to the sacred is older than any
The sacred can be found in any form: in every drop formalized religion, even though it lies at the
of dew on an early morning spider’s web, in the foundation of many religions. It is a fundamental
call of wildfowl at dusk. It speaks to us in a myriad recognition of the wonder, beauty, and divine
of ways. In my own garden it is in the scent of nature of the world. It is a felt reverence, an inner
honeysuckle and the hummingbird drinking nectar, sense – we even speak of “a sense of the sacred.”
or the chipmunk scurrying after the seeds fallen If we remember the sacred, we will find ourself in
from the bird feeder. It is also present in every a world awake in wonder. However we may call
prayer, every song of praise and thanksgiving. The this mystery, it permeates all of creation. It may be
remembrance of the sacred is like a central note more easily felt in certain places, in ancient groves,
within life. Without it something fundamental to beneath star-filled skies, in temples or cathedrals,
our existence is missing. Our daily life lacks a basic in the chords of music. But this is a mystery that
nourishment, a depth of meaning. belongs to all that exists – there is nothing that is
separate from it. As such, it celebrates the unity
The “sacred” is not something primarily religious that is within and around us, the living oneness of
or even spiritual. It is not a quality we need to which we are a part. Our sense of the sacred is a
learn or to develop. It belongs to the primary recognition that we are a part of this deeper all-
nature of all that is. When the First Peoples felt embracing mystery.
that everything they saw was sacred, this was not
something taught but instinctively known. It was The sacred is not something static or easily defined.
as natural as sunlight, as necessary as breathing. It belongs to the wonder of life and its deepest
We all have within us a sense of the sacred, a sense meaning. It is also part of the flow of life, its
of reverence, however we may articulate it. It is a constant change. And yet it has cycles, patterns
part of our human nature. of meaning. Both creation and the soul have their

Au gu s t 2 02 1 75
TAS T E O F L I FE

seasons, their times of light and dark, times of days, and years that never return – a river of time
birth, blossoming and abundance, times of fruition, that is always passing. We rarely think anymore of
decay and apparent barrenness. It can be helpful time as cyclical, of the days as a movement of light
to recognize these changing seasons of the sacred. and dark, or the years as a pattern of returning
Then we can see how the deeper patterns within seasons – most of us do not live on the land with
our own life follow these rhythms – how we are its rhythm of sowing and harvesting. We have also
part of this ever-evolving mystery. almost forgotten how the outer movement of time
can reflect the time of the soul. Few still mark the
The sacred is a quality of the soul, of our inner year with the saint’s days, or the prayers, rituals,
being and the inner being of the Earth. The or dances that belong to sacred days. Nor do we
experience of the sacred follows the rhythms of hear the monastery bells that, before the arrival of
the soul and of the Earth, the cycles of becoming, clocks, divided the day for both the monks and the
the seasons of life. In today’s world we are caught medieval farmers, a day that began with Matins
in an image of time as an endless flow of minutes, and ended with Vespers.

76 H eart f u l n es s
TA S T E OF LIFE

This deeper cycle of sacred time, which was known


to our ancestors, linked the greater and lesser
events of their lives – the days, the seasons, and the
years: The sacred is a quality of

To every thing there is a season, and a time to


the soul, of our inner
every purpose under the heaven: being and the inner being
A time to be born, and a time to die; a time of the Earth. The
to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is
planted; experience of the sacred
A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to
follows the rhythms of
break down, and a time to build up;

the soul and of the Earth,
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to the cycles of becoming,
mourn, and a time to dance;

the seasons of life.
A time to cast away stones, and a time to
gather stones together; a time to embrace, and
a time to refrain from embracing;


A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to This deeper rhythm of time is the rhythm of the
keep, and a time to cast away;
 sacred. To be in the presence of the sacred is to
be present in a time very different from what we
A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to experience in our rushed days with the constant
keep silence, and a time to speak;
 demands of the clock. It allows us to listen to
a rhythm of meaning, understanding our place
A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of within patterns of time that link the growth of a
war, and a time of peace. seed to the phases of the moon and the movement
of the stars. To live in sacred time is to be present
Ecclesiastes 3:1–8, The Bible in how this greater pattern connects with our own
soul, our inner being, in which every breath is a
sacred moment.

But despite our forgetfulness, despite our


heated or air-conditioned homes and offices,
our disconnection from the soil, the seasons still
speak to most of us, from the first warm breath of
Spring to the cold wind of Winter. The seasons

Au gu s t 2 02 1 77
TAS T E O F L I FE

Every moment is unique,


offering its own way to
connect to what is deepest
within us, to the wonder and
mystery of being fully alive.

remind us of our deeper roots and the rhythms of the sacred in each moment. Every moment is
that are our heritage. As we get older we can also unique, offering its own way to connect to what is
begin to sense the same seasons in the passage of deepest within us, to the wonder and mystery of
years, from birth and childhood to old age, when being fully alive.
our body’s energy lessens before time returns
us to the earth. In the unfolding of our soul we Ten thousand flowers in spring, the moon
can recognize similar patterns. In previous times in autumn, a cool breeze in summer, snow
and cultures this inner unfolding was marked by in winter.
If your mind isn’t clouded by
initiations, by sacred rites of passage. Now, for unnecessary things, this is the best season of
most of us there are few outer initiations. Instead, your life.
if we pay attention, we can come to feel the seasons
that define our own soul. We can learn to respect Wu-Men
and appreciate the way time speaks to us, how its
wisdom is within us. Adapted from Seasons of the Sacred: Reconnecting to
the Wisdom within Nature and the Soul. Golden Sufi
Putting aside our daily concerns and our mind’s Center, 2021.
clutter, we can learn to be present to the presence

78 H eart f u l n es s
TRUTH:

REBECCA LILLY

Exploring untruth
Isn’t enough; in truth, it
Must be discovered

Prior to mind-made
Self and inclusive of it;
The one face of truth

Truth is pathless; our


Awakeness, a happening;
Self, emptied of past

Au gu s t 2 02 1 79
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