When Good Hair Goes Bad by Nikki Walton
When Good Hair Goes Bad by Nikki Walton
When Good Hair Goes Bad by Nikki Walton
good
hair
goes
bad
WHEN GOOD HAIR GOES BAD. Copyright © 2016 by L’Oréal
USA, Inc. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America.
No part of this book may be used in any manner whatsoever without
written permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in
critical articles and reviews.
FIRST EDITION
INTRODUCTION
WHO WE ARE
Let’s start at the top. I am Nikki Walton of CurlyNikki.com and I run the
world’s #1 natural hair care blog. I started the site in 2008 after winning
a longtime personal battle that involved my self-image and the need to
embrace my own natural hair. Believe it or not, how you feel about your
hair can become very much tied to your self-esteem. If you’re not feeling
your hair, you’re not feeling yourself. Since I began this journey almost
10 years ago, I’ve made more than a dozen television appearances, earned
an NAACP Image Award nomination, nabbed best-selling author status,
and created a platform from which a living community of natural-haired
women has grown. That community has shaped and become part of the
institution that is the natural hair movement. And none of this could be
possible without you.
9
If you’re not yet familiar with the natural hair movement: A.) Where
have you been? and B.) Get ready to be. We are a family. We’ve revolu-
tionized hair care. We love and support one another, no exceptions. We
love ourselves, no exceptions. In addition, we inspire healthy debate, we
uplift one another, we encourage one another and we inspire each other
to be the best versions of ourselves. It goes without saying, when you
have a network of inspired women who do that, you create an unstop-
pable wave. Welcome to the vanguard squad I lead and the awesomeness
we provide.
10
natural haired women are dominating that space. Relaxer sales are down
while sales of products related to styling, conditioning, protecting, treat-
ing and coloring hair are up. The industry took notice, and our hair has
been reaping some fabulous rewards! What other group of women is
claiming responsibility for catalyzing that change? Don’t worry, I’ll wait.
Some people might say I’m just a blogger and they’d be wrong. I’m more
than just a blogger, more than an author, more than a TV personality. I’m
a girl who likes to wear her hair just the way it grows. In the years that I
have been a part of the natural hair community, I have made it a point to
travel and explore, to bring a little of the world to the people who follow
my over-shared life, and more importantly bring this platform to the
voice of other less-heard individuals. We’ve met black soldiers in Japan,
slum residents in India, disadvantaged residents of the West Bank, the
beautifully melinated girls of Brazil and Spain, non-profit organizations
and sometimes just groups of fabulous people who are helping others
by simply telling their story. Not bad for a girl from Ferguson, Missouri
right? These curly culture missions have shed light on parts of the world
our eyes don’t often see to show us that we are not so different from our
foreign counterparts. This is the community we belong to. Our natural
hair community represents all different shades, ages and backgrounds -
so it’s important that you’re heard.
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battles that often get lumped together in the same war. It’s hard to em-
brace it when you don’t know how to care for it and you won’t ever learn
how to care for it unless you embrace it. A lot of us are somewhere in the
middle and that’s what the rest of this book is about. The journey. This
book is for the women who began the journey towards achieving their
favorite natural look and somewhere along the road had a little (or big)
hair hiccup and needed a quick ‘how-to’ on fixing major blunders. So in
short, this book is for everybody. We’ve all been there. We’ve left the dye
in a little too long, forgot to detangle for a few weeks (or months), ran
out of conditioner so we just...stopped using it, or all of the above at the
same damn time. I cannot tell you how many times a day I get emails to
help fix the same issues over, and over, and over (x100). To respond to
all those emails would be instant carpal tunnel syndrome and I’m pretty
sure I am just one detangling session from already being there. So here
it is ladies, my short and sweet guide to you to help you through those
times When Good Hair Goes Bad.
Love,
NIKKI WALTON
12
14
WHEN Good HAIR GOES BAD
MY PROMISE TO YOU
After you finish reading this section…
»» DETANGLING will no longer be a huge issue for you—
even if you’re super busy.
»» You’ll have figured out the best ways to go about FIX-
ING your receding hairline.
»» You’ll be convinced that CHEATING is totally fine.
15
BAD
Split ends will cause your shower comb to want to give up on life be-
tween professional trims (which I suggest you get twice a year). Dusting
is a great year-round solve, because it’s an easy way to keep them under
control until your next appointment.
How easy? Okay, all you have to do every six to eight weeks is…
16
FUN (BUT SORTA MESSY) FACT
Here’s what you want to do: USE MORE CONDITIONER. I don’t care
what the bottle is telling you. If you’re having trouble detangling with the
prescribed amount of conditioner, use more. I know, I know. Those of
us who are into luxury brands of conditioner might not be feeling that
tip. Try…
»» Detangling with a cheaper conditioner before finishing
up with the good stuff
»» Dilute your favorite conditioner with water in a separate
bottle before applying it to your tangles.
17
BAD
DEEP CONDITION
Listen, there is no better way to get your hair in good shape than a deep
conditioning treatment at every wash session.
Regular deep conditioning will ensure that your hair is softer, more man-
ageable, and less vulnerable to breakage and frizz.
But, if you’re barely finding time to wash your hair, much less deep con-
dition it, OR if you just want to make your hair really love you, try….
PRE-POOING
The nighttime is the right time to pre-poo. My number one pre-poo of
choice is coconut oil because it really coats and protects your hair cuti-
cles, but Greek yogurt or a conditioner from your product graveyard are
also good choices.
Simply apply your pre-poo to dry, dirty hair and throw a clear shower
cap over it. You can leave it in for about 15 to 30 minutes with good
heat, like a micro heat cap or bonnet dryer OR you can hit the sack and
let your pre-poo do its conditioning work overnight. Win-win for super
busy curlies and hair pampering divas alike. I personally apply warmed
coconut oil to my curls 20 minutes before I get into the shower to com-
mence wash day duties.
18
3. CHECK YOURSELF BEFORE YOU WRECK YOURSELF AND
BY “YOURSELF” WE MEAN “YOUR HAIRSTYLE CHOICES.”
OBVIOUSLY.
So, if your hair is okay after a week of twist-and-curls, but crying like
a banshee after a wash-and-go, consider either taking that hairstyle off
your go-to list, or only wearing it when you know you’ll have more time
to spend on a detangling session.
Also, ANY style in which shed hair gets caught up and is unable to fall—
so basically any protective style—will come with some detangling issues.
So, don’t expect your post braid or extension hair not to have some clap-
back for you when you go in for the detangle.
But, all hope is not lost for those of us who prefer styles that don’t require
a lot of fuss.
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NIKKI’S BUSY MOM DETANGLE STRATEGY
STEP 1
I finger detangle with coconut oil before hopping into the show-
er to do the real work.
STEP 2
In the shower, I wet my hair and smooth in ALL the condition-
er. I mean All. The. Conditioner. Like at least half the bottle.
Just kidding…about kidding—because really I am so serious.
DO NOT SKIMP ON THAT CONDITIONER.
STEP 3
I run my head under the shower stream to help activate the
slip. I then let it marinate in the shower while I take care of all
my other hygenics. Finally, I gently detangle under the shower
stream with my fingers, using them like a comb to remove knots
from ends to roots. Then I follow up with my wooden brush for
any trouble spots.
Damn right. That somebody is me, and since I said it, it must
be true!
21
4. PREVENT! PREVENT! PREVENT!
22
23
CHECK YO KITCHEN
COCONUT OIL
It’s perfect for pre-poos and detangling sessions because it
coats your hair cuticles and protects it from the wear and tear
of washing and over-manipulation.
Just make sure you rinse very thoroughly or your hair will
smell less than appealing. I remember grabbing Boogie to
smell her butt one day, like “what in the entire hell is that?”
and then realized I was smelling of my own curls….
ALOE VERA
Works hard for very little money by not only smoothing the
cuticle surface, but also attracting and sealing in moisture.
Nice! It also works for when you burn your ear with that flat
iron you haven’t used in months...
24
CHECK YOUR PRODUCT GRAVEYARD
IN ORGANIC PRODUCTS
»» slippery elm
»» marshmallow root
»» jojoba oil
»» behentrimonium methosulfate (my favorite
ingredient for detangling)
IN EVERYTHING ELSE:
»» the right alcohols(don’t worry these are not
the drying kinds of alcohol): cetyl alcohol,
cetearyl alcohol, stearyl alcohol
»» amodimethicone
»» behentrimonium chloride 25
25
BAD
I GET IT. BELIEVE ME, I GET IT, HONEY. HAIRLINE EROSION IS THE #1
HAIR ENVIRONMENT ISSUE FACING CURLFRIENDS TODAY. BUT ALL
IS NOT (HAIR)LOSS! KNOWLEDGE IS POWER, SO LET’S GO OVER...
Before you do anything, decide right now if you’re guilty of any of the
following:
TOO-TIGHT STYLES
Those super-slick ponytails and puffs are bad. Too-tight braid extensions
are even worse. And micro-braids? I mean, micro-braids??? Those em-ef-
fers with their traumatic put-in and take-out processes will TEAR UP
your hairline.
Keep your styles loose, and think twice before going to that slick po-
ny-puff more than once or twice a month.
Don’t use too much tension while putting in regular braids, and definite-
ly don’t do micro-braids more than once or twice a year, tops.
26
HEAVY BRAIDS
Those heavy braids are sooo cute—until they snatch your hairline back
a few centimeters. When deciding on braid and twist extensions, go for
lighter hair (like Marley hair) and ask your stylist to make sure your hair
is braided/taken up in larger sections—especially around the edges.
EXTREME DIY
Okay, listen, I love those hairstyling videos on YouTube, too. Some of
these divas are throwing down with their DIY braids and extensions. And
who wouldn’t want to save money by doing their own special hairstyles
in the privacy of their Being Mary Jane binge watch? But…professionals
are professionals for a reason. For the love of your edges, hire someone to
put in your weaves and braids.
27
BAD
2. HYGRAL FATIGUE
Okay, here’s the part where it gets sort of confusing because remember
when I was all like, “Moisturize! Moisturize! I mean, seriously, use half
a bottle of conditioner to get ‘er done if you have to”? Weeeeelll, some-
times your hair can become too moisturized, which will lead to breakage
and excessive shedding.
So, think twice before washing your hair more than once or twice a
week. Hair is like a nice sweater. If you wash and/or moisturize it too
much, it can become wore out with something called hygral fatigue.
Hygral Fatigue happens when the hair shaft swells in excess because of
overexposure to water. This swelling causes the cuticle to lift, which leads
to splitting in the hair shaft during the drying process.
But, good news! Simply extending the time between your wash days will
help, which means your new goal is second and third day hair! You can
avoid re-washing and conditioning your hair so soon by rocking chic
updos, silk head wraps and high, messy buns.
I THINK A LOT OF YOU ALREADY KNOW, HATS ARE NOT YOUR FRIEND
WHEN IT COMES TO AVOIDING LEBRONING (WHEN YOUR HAIRLINE
TAKES 4-6 STEPS BACKWARDS). SCARF UP BEFORE YOU GO FOR
THAT HAT, CURLFRIEND! AND WE’VE TALKED ABOUT GLUE ALREADY.
BUT HERE’S SOME OTHER STUFF TO AVOID TO KEEP YOUR HAIRLINE
NICE AND WHERE IT IS.
28
WIGS AND WIG CAPS
I get wigs. Believe me, I get them. They’re easy and entertaining and ev-
er-changing. How in the Tina Turner could any Curlfriend hate on wigs?
Also, wigs can be a great protective style with the right education, prep
work and care.
However, this has to be said: Wig caps are not good for your hairline,
and wigs themselves can eventually become detrimental to your real hair,
your scalp and your self-esteem. I’m not saying to stop wearing wigs
altogether, I’m saying don’t wear them every single day. Don’t make that
Long Hair Don’t Care look your whole identity to the point you feel
you can’t leave the house without Sasha Fierce on your head. And most
definitely don’t sacrifice your real hair to the Wig Goddess.
29
4. AGE OR PREGNANCY HORMONES OR SOMETHING ELSE
Age does play a factor in hairline loss. And as lovely and buoyant as
your hair looks while you’re gestating that new life, it’s going to get hor-
ror-show real when you go to detangle after those pregnancy hormones
wear off. I’ve received notes from new curly mamas who’ve pulled out
palms full of shedded hair during their first detangling sessions after baby.
I get it, but real talk: consulting a dermatologist is sometimes the only
way to fix hairline and scalp problems. Conditions like Seborrheic Der-
matitis and age-related balding can often only be helped with prescrip-
tion meds. Also, dermatologists can recommend supplements and spe-
cial things to stop hair loss and in some cases, stimulate new hair growth.
Basically, they have all sorts of magical solutions that no book or blog
will ever be able to give you. Just budget a little extra for that co-pay.
PURGE THIS
Nightcaps with elastic, too-tight wigs, weave glue, hard headbands, too-
tight braids and updos, hats without scarves underneath, harsh hairspray,
edge gel, and extreme DIY YouTube Tutorials. BOOK AN APPOINT-
MENT with your dermatologist or hairstylist.
31
BAD
The problem is that most of us have been raised to aim for monogamous
relationships. However…
I know, I know, that one leave-in conditioner, oil, or gel did you so nice
when you first met. It made your hair soft and HUGE—you were block-
ing views at the movie theater and stopping traffic.
But, surely you’ve noticed that something’s just not right in the bathroom
lately. The magic has gone out of your hair, and no matter how much of
your favorite products you use, your hair just lies there limp and lifeless.
32
BOUNCE YOUR HAIR BACK WITH
NIKKI’S 4-STEP CLARIFYING WASH
First, you’ve got to wash that product right out of your head. Your hair
may simply be weighed down from frequent co-washing, gels, serums or
that glob of conditioner you left in your hair last wash day ‘cause it had
your curls popping. All of these can weigh your hair down and cause
dull, lifeless, frizzy curls that don’t seem capable of holding your favorite
styles anymore. Sometimes simply resetting your hair with a nice clari-
fying wash will solve your problem. So, before you do or cut anything,
clarify with a low-sulfate shampoo.
33
BAD
STEP 2: CLEANSE
For a clarification wash, DON’T just glob your shampoo on and rub it
around.
DO…
»» Dilute your shampoo in a dye applicator bottle.
»» Section your hair and apply the diluted shampoo directly
to your scalp. The applicator bottle will give you access to
your scalp and allows for such awesome distribution that
the length will get clean from the run off.
»» Clarify wash only ONE time. that’s enough - no need to
rinse and repeat like back in the day.
34
STEP 4: DECIDE
Wether or not you want to go back to your old product boos—once you clar-
ify, your old product routine might start working just fine again.
OR
Try out a new possible boo for a few weeks. As a therapist, I can’t suggest
trading your man in for a side bae in real life, but in this product life? Well,
let’s just say, no single product will ever make your hair completely happy.
Sometimes you may even have to try more than one at time to get the desired
effect.
Don’t be afraid to get back out there, Curlfriend and EXPERIMENT with
products that have the following ingredients:
»» behentrimonium chloride or behentrimonium methosulfate:
great for slip and conditioning
»» Polyquats 44 or 10: Products with these ingredients not only
have wonderful detangling and moisturizing benefits, but
also make your hair stronger and more elastic.
»» Aloe Vera Gel: Awesome for styling and profiling, if it’s not
already part of your product stable.
35
TRY THIS TO HEAL YOUR HAIRLINE:
CARDIO
Yes, Curlfriend, I’m totally serious. Getting your heart rate up
on the regular will increase blood flow to your head, and have
that hairline pumped up and ready to grow!
In the morning, I just take off the scarf and, voilà! My edges
are laid: smooth and frizz-free, no damaging edge gels required.
WHAT’S NEXT
Now that you’ve got your curls back pop-
ping, you might want to switch it up and
consider adding some color.
37
38
WHEN Good HAIR GOES COLOR
MY PROMISE TO YOU
After you finish reading this section…
»» Gray? What Gray? You’ll be able to henna that gray right
out of your hair.
»» To Purple or Not to purple? You’ll have the knowledge
you need to make sure a bold change won’t turn your
beautiful hair into a curl graveyard.
»» And you’ll know exactly how to keep your new head of
colored curls bouncy and vibrant.
39
COLOR
For starters, there will be less dye wreckage in your bathroom, and quite
frankly, if you botch this up at home, a salon is most likely where you’re
going to end up anyway. So, even if you do decide to do this at home, it’s
probably best to ask around for a good colorist (more on that later in the
section), so that you’ll have a resource if worse comes to worst.
40
3 WAYS TO GET BOMB COLOR WITHOUT BLEACH
Your Hairstylist Might Also Not Be the Right Person for This Particular Job.
I’ll go a lot deeper into this topic in Section Three, but for now, just
know there is a difference between a Stylist and a Colorist.
41
COLOR
Both should have cosmetology licenses, but one has gone out of her way
to learn about the art of coloring hair, either with an apprenticeship or
from taking special classes above and beyond her cosmetology license.
See why you might prefer one over the other? So, in the ideal salon sit-
uation, your hair stylist should refer you to a colorist for your hair color
needs. In any case, the proof is in the pictures. If your hair stylist says she
can do color but has no proof of coloring experience, consider opting for
a colorist.
How do you find a good colorist? Talk to your natural friends or if you
don’t have any with experience, throw the question out on social media.
If crowdsourcing amongst curlies fails, ask any of your friends with col-
or you love! Many colorists are so well-trained that they can handle all
grades of hair. So if your friend is just rocking her purple hair, ask her for
the name of her colorist, and call to ask if she can handle curls.
BE A BETTER CURLFRIEND
42
LET’S TALK ABOUT COLOR, BABY!
BLONDE (SERIOUSLY DON’T SKIP READING THIS)
Even if you’re not planning to go the full-on Beyoncé route, you need to
know about this color since lightening is at the base of every bold color
change. If your hair is naturally black or dark brown to begin with and
you want to go, say, blue, then you’ll have to lighten it first. For this reason
lightening your hair to go blonde is kind of the best route if you want that
real head-turning color. But lightening your hair is also the worst. If done
improperly, it will completely fry your hair. And this, of all the color pro-
cesses is most likely to change your curl pattern.
RED
PROs: Great. Not Harsh. Good way to make a noticeable change.
CONs: Can go brassy and leave you looking like a penny. Also, the color
gets all over everything. Seriously, your shower will look like Norman Bates
has paid a visit after that first post-dye wash.
BLACK
PROS: Closest to many curlies’ natural hair color. Easiest of all the colors
to get your hair to take.
CONS: As close to your natural color as it is, jet black can look shockingly
unnatural. In a few cases, the color will actually age you up, in an unat-
tractive Ronald Reagan like way.
BROWN
PROS: Brown is kind of perfect. It gives your hair a nice little lift, and
looks great on nearly every shade of skin.
CONS: Ask your multiracial curlfriends, brown can serve up ‘dull’ and
‘dry’ with the quickness. You have to keep your everyday moisture game
tight if you want to go brown.
43
USING COCONUT OIL TO
SAFELY LIGHTEN YOUR HAIR
44
Okay, you’ve decided whether you’re going to go to a salon or stay at the
crib and what color you want to put on your locks. You’re ready to do
this, right? Nerp, not quite yet. Before you head out to the salon or push
play on that YouTube tutorial, you have to…
45
COLOR
NOW YOUR HAIR IS NICE AND READY FOR COLOR* (You’re welcome)
*One more friendly reminder BEFORE you color.
46
SEMI-PERMANENT
VS. DEMI-PERMANENT
VS. PERMANENT COLOR
47
COLOR
2. HENNA
Henna is a great option for naturalistas who want to keep it real—but
not too real (40 might be the new 30, but that gray hair just won’t let you
get your groove back).
Henna has all sorts of amazing properties: It not only gently colors your
hair, it also strengthens it and makes your curls less prone to breakage.
I use henna on my own gray hair situation and I seriously cannot say
enough good things about it. When new grays come in or my roots
show, I simply apply a treatment, and after a couple of days, it oxidiz-
es to a nice bronzey red. After another treatment, the roots match the
length-auburn.
The only drawback: You’ll need to do multiple applications the first time
you henna to darken your grays to the color you want-- to go from
copper to auburn. It’s also important to note that since henna coats the
cuticle, permanent dye jobs down the road could yield unpredictable
and uneven results. If you decide you want to switch to permanent color,
you’ll have to grow out your hennaed hair first.
48
HENNA TREATMENT INSTRUCTIONS
STEP 1
Mix cooled green or black tea and 100-200g of henna in a plastic con-
tainer and apply the mixture to your freshly-cleansed, damp hair.
STEP 2
Put on a plastic cap and sit under a micro heat cap for four or more hours
OR put on a winter beanie and go about your chores and life—do some
cardio and let your body provide the heat!
STEP 3
Rinse the henna mix in your kitchen sink or in your tub directly under
the faucet. Apply your favorite cheapie conditioner (a lot of it) and head
for the shower. Rinse and rinse and rinse some mo’. Condition and de-
tangle with your usual conditioner.
After applying enough henna to your grays to tint them dark, make sure
to stay on top of your micro trims AND condition, condition, condition
to keep your hair moisturized, elastic, and supple.
49
NIKKI’S BUSY CURL MOM
HENNA GLOSS RECIPE
INSTRUCTIONS
STEP 1
Mix conditioner and about a tablespoon to 100g of henna in a
plastic container and apply the mixture to your dry hair.
STEP 2
Put on a plastic cap and sit under a micro heat cap for 45 min-
utes OR put on a winter beanie and move around a couple of
hours (let your body provide the heat).
STEP 3
Rinse off the henna in the shower. Condition and detangle
with your usual conditioner.
STEP 4
No deep conditioning treatment necessary after using this
henna gloss. Just go about your fabulous business with stron-
ger, healthier, tinted hair.
50
Henna is a great, natural way to make the grays go away. But, if you’re
very color-specific or just don’t want to deal with henna…
Don’t want to set yourself up for a questionable salon product sales pitch?
Simply re-phrase the question: “I’m on a budget. Can you tell me how
to take care of this color with products I can find at Target?” But just in
case, here’s how to keep your colored hair looking shiny and new until
it’s time for your touch-up…
51
52
Are you willing to chase after youth at any cost, or can you
embrace your beautiful age? This is why I’ve always taught
women to recognize that happiness and fulfillment is an
inside job. If anything ‘out there’ in the world of change
(your man, your bank account, your job title, your fancy
car, your beauty) can make you happy, then its absence
can make you sad. We have to take responsibility for our
own joy and we do that by realizing we are always divinely
whole, beautiful and perfect-even if that looks like gray
and thinning at this present moment.
54
WHAT’S NEXT
So, now you know how to take care of your col-
or-treated hair before and after your trip to the
salon or your successful at home dye session.
55
56
WHEN Good HAIR GOES FRIED
MY PROMISE TO YOU
57
FRIED
However, one of the biggest selling points for going natural can become
one of the biggest reasons for an unintended second big chop if you’re
not careful with your heat. So…
So, first and foremost, ALWAYS use a silicone-based heat protectant be-
fore directing heat at your hair. Due to early century claims that silicones
caused build-up and would suffocate and/or dry out your hair, many
curlies still refuse to use any product with silicones in it. But, quite to
the contrary, silicones coat your strands and keep heat from penetrating
the cuticle layer too fast. Remember, when heat penetrates this layer too
fast, small cracks form on the cuticle surface, and that’s what leads to
breakage. That’s why when it comes to heat, science says silicones are a
curl’s best friend.
So, before you apply heat, make sure to apply a serum or spray with hy-
drolyzed proteins, quats, PVP and/or silicones.
58
DRY LIKE A WINNER
The absolute best and least damaging way to dry your hair
for straightening purposes, is with a Roller Set. Roller sets
not only add automatic volume to your hair, but they also
stretch and smooth your hair under a hood dryer (you could
also air dry!), which means your locks spend much less time
in contact with direct heat. (But make sure to take them out
before you leave the house.)
STEP 1
Wash and detangle your hair as usual (though many curlies swear by a
pre-roller set clarifying wash).
STEP 2
Dry with a t-shirt or microfiber towel to cut down on drying time. The
last thing you want to do before putting in a roller set is scratch up your
strands’ cuticles with a rough bath towel.
STEP 3
Apply a light leave-in to your entire head of hair.
59
FRIED
STEP 4
Section out your hair. I prefer parting my hair in four big sections (two
in front and two in back). Clip the two front sections and one of the
back ones.
STEP 5
Section off a piece of hair in the back to fit in one curler. Be conservative
with this measurement because if there’s too much hair in the curler, it
will take longer to dry, which defeats all sorts of purposes.
STEP 6
Comb the piece of hair going into the roller and spritz or massage in a
heat protectant.
STEP 7
Place roller under the section and roller down and up, applying tension
as you roll, so that your hair rolls up as straight as possible.
STEP 8
Repeat steps 4-8 until all four sections are handled.
STEP 9
Once you’re all rollered up, sit under the hooded dryer for at least 30
minutes.
Now your hair is ready for flat-ironing and/or styling. Or you can just
wear it like this. If you’re short on time, and simply must blow dry, do so
rarely and instead of reaching for the round brush, use The Tension Meth-
od: holding your hair taut in one hand and stretching it downward while
you hold the dryer in the other hand, angling it down the hair shaft to
stretch the hair as you dry your hair on the coolest setting. Also be sure to
blot away excess moisture with a t-shirt before blow-drying to cut down
on heat exposure! Never blow-dry wet hair—only damp.
60
NOW YOU’RE READY TO FLAT-IRON LIKE A BOSS
DO NOT RUSH a flat-iron job, and absolutely DO NOT FLAT-IRON
EVERY DAY. Flat-ironing should be reserved for either wash days or
even better, special occasions only. If you want to wear your hair straight
every day, style with a mind toward making your flat-iron last as long as
possible OR consider safely flat-ironing it once and having hair exten-
sions put in over flat-ironing it every day.
In any case, you’ll usually know a few days ahead of time when you’ll
want to straighten your hair, so make sure to set aside at least an hour to
do the best, least-damaging job possible. Trust me, rushing and constant-
ly flat-ironing will provide you with a crispy ticket to the dreaded “troll
doll” effect (see the next question).
STEP 1
SPRITZ heat protectant onto your whole head of hair—otherwise you’ll
forget as you go along, trust me.
STEP 2
SECTION. I’m a huge fan of working in sections because it keeps the
process organized and much more efficient. Divide your hair into four
big sections, and tackle one section at a time.
STEP 3
ONE SMALL PIECE AT A TIME. Section off no more than one inch
of hair to be flat-ironed. Remember, you only want to run the flat iron
over each piece once to minimize heat damage. It’s better to take your
time and flat-iron smaller sections of hair, than to run your flat iron over
a larger section of hair more than once.
61
FRIED
DO NOT APPLY any oils or butters to your hair. This may yield a
smoother result (the first time), but adding oil and butter and then
flat-ironing is basically the same as throwing your curls into a frying
pan. You don’t want crispy hair and you’re not making waffles or pan-
cakes, so stay away from the oils and butters!
STEP 4
TAKE YOUR TIME and flat-iron your hair piece by small piece until
you’re done. Use the chase method, where-in you ‘chase’ a fine-tooth
comb with your flat iron from root to tip. This yields the straightest,
sleekest results.
STEP 5
APPLY an oil, serum or finish sheen after you flat-iron to strengthen and
shine up your straightened locks.
AFTERCARE
»» Wrap and scarf your flat-ironed hair every night.
»» Create at least two large bantu knots (I like 8-12 for add-
ed texture) every night to give your straightened hair vol-
ume and waves.
Give your hair extra conditioning love when it comes time to wash it
out—post flat-iron is a great time to do a Reconstructor Treatment [see
next question].
62
WHEN BUYING A FLAT IRON
HERE’S WHAT TO LOOK FOR
Here are some of my favorite styles for straightened hair, which also add
volume and texture:
»» Buns (high, low, messy, and mom)
»» Goddess and Halo braids
»» Bantu Knots
»» Braid outs
63
BLOW YOUR OWN HAIR STRAIGHT BEFORE GETTING EXTENSIONS
AND TRIMS, SO THAT YOU KNOW THIS STEP IS DONE AS SAFELY AS
POSSIBLE. DOING THIS YOURSELF WILL SAVE YOU BOTH TIME AND
HAIR DAMAGE.
64
QUESTION #2: OH MY GOSH, NIKKI, THE TEXTURE OF MY
HAIR HAS CHANGED FROM GOING TOO HARD WITH THE
FLAT IRON! NOW WHAT?
You are not alone. The structure of our hair is largely determined by the
natural state of the proteins that make it up. Proteins are very sensitive to
heat and when it gets too high, the proteins lose their structure and “un-
wind.” It’s the same reason your granny can’t leave her insulin (a protein)
out of the fridge too long. It basically just comes undone.
Now, back away from the big chop scissors, and please, oh please, don’t
make it even worse by trying to flat-iron your hair back into submission!
You cannot ‘50 shades’ your hair. Here’s what to do when you find a troll
doll where your curly afro used to be…
65
FRIED
Now ladies, we all know, thirst trapping those edges is not a good look. So
if you want that forever love, make sure to deep condition after every wash.
Here’s a super-simple but super-effective formula for giving you hair the
deep conditioning love it deserves:
ADD a Hot Oil Treatment – [Refer back to Section One for best oils and
practices]
66
GIVE IT TIME
In most cases, you didn’t damage your hair overnight, so you’re not going
to be able to fix it with one wash. In many ways, growing out heat dam-
age is a lot like growing out a relaxer, so patience is KEY.
On average, hair only grows 0.5–1 inches a month, and it takes some
people a couple of years to grow out a relaxer. So, I recommend Re-
constructor Treatments and deep conditioning along with dusting for at
least five to six months before making the final decision about whether
to do a big chop.
Most of all, try not to beat yourself up about this. The experience of hav-
ing to grow out heat and/or dye damage is not at all uncommon in the
natural community. I myself, experienced serious heat damage a decade
ago and you know what? I ended up learning a lot about myself and my
hair from the experience.
In fact, growing out that heat damage actually set me on the path to
becoming a natural hair blogger. Now I know more about taking great
care of my hair than I could have ever imagined when I first cried over
the damage I’d done to it with too much flat ironing.
The key for me was frequent trims every month, so that there was never
any need for a drastic haircut. I also avoided heat for quite awhile, which
was how I learned to fully embrace my curls. And there was one more
natural hair weapon that helped me through this tough time. Read on to
discover what it was…
67
FRIED
DEEP UNDERCOVER!!!
Seriously though, once you’ve packed away your heat tools, committed
to a Reconstructor and deep condition program, and scheduled trims
with a stylist about every 8 to 12 weeks, the only thing left to do is to fig-
ure out what to do with your hair while it’s under heavy reconstruction.
The truth is, many of us—including me—didn’t learn to style our hair
without heat until we had to in order to save it.
So, unless you’re on a secret mission, opt for hairstyles that blend your
two hair textures and don’t require much manipulation. As a rule of
thumb, any style that requires a ton of brushing and combing is a huge
NO.
68
Messy or Loose Buns
Last but not least, here are a few accessory sidekicks to help you through
while your hair’s undergoing its big remodel.
Scarves and turbans are way more versatile than hats, and can be worn to
every kind of event, from work to play to fancy parties.
69
AND YOU KNOW, HATS ARE STILL OUR HIDEAWAY
FRIENDS. CHIC SATIN-LINED HATS AND TRENDY FE-
DORAS WORN OVER SCARVES ARE ALWAYS IN STYLE.
In my opinion, a curly can never have too many over-
sized beanies. Beanies perfect for throwing on with
a cute outfit and allow you to simply walk out your
door without any hair fuss. This laid-back look is a
great go-to for weekend brunch and it practically
sings “cool and low maintenance girl” on coffee dates.
When I’m on holiday in ridiculously humid destina-
tions, beanies are my favorite accessory!
70
WHAT’S NEXT
Okay, so now you know what to do if you de-
cide to keep and reconstruct your natural hair.
71
72
WHEN Good HAIR GOES CHOPPED
One of the things natural blogs like CurlyNikki.com cover almost to the
point of exhaustion is big chopping. There are so many great resources
out there to guide you through your first big chop, including my first
book, Better Than Good Hair.
Sometimes the first big chop you get isn’t your last. Sometimes people
chop again because they decide they just plain like shorter hair better,
but more often than that, curlies chop because of damage. And in some
cases, curlies chop in order to achieve a trendy new look.
Either way, here are a few answers to questions we’ve gotten about issues
that arise after a second big chop or a trendy cut….
MY PROMISE TO YOU
After you finish reading this section…
»» You’ll be ready to either REPAIR your relationship with
your hairdresser or move on to another.
»» You’ll have a plan for GROWING OUT YOUR HAIR
post chop or shave.
»» TEXTURE CHANGE handled. You’ll know how to
deal when you find a 4b stranger where your full head of
3c used to be.
»» You’ll have even more SUPER CUTE STYLE IDEAS
for your short hair.
73
QUESTION #1: HELP, NIKKI! MY HAIRDRESSER
MESSED UP MY HAIR! HOW DO I GET HER TO FIX
THIS?!?!
Maybe you’ve been sitting in her chair for years. You would
invite her to Sunday dinner, and even over for girls’ night—
well, at least you did until now.
Maybe she told you she was a bomb beautician (Google boy
pretends to be a doctor), but didn’t have a hair license.
74
WHAT BECOMES OF THE BROKEN-HEARTED? HOW TO
EITHER FIX YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR HAIR-
DRESSER...OR MOVE ON
If you’re there for a trim that will help you grow out your hair, make sure
to tell your stylist that before she picks up her scissors.
Also, make sure to fully fantasize out your look before you sit down in
the chair. What do I mean by that? I mean you need to take the time to
paint a picture for yourself and your hairdresser about what you want to
achieve with your cut, and even more importantly, what maintaining it
will look like to you.
75
76
NOW...KEEPING IT REAL.
If you don’t even have one side of this triangle, then you’ll have to work
with your stylist to achieve a look that doesn’t require anything more
than what you actually have to give.
In the same vein, you don’t want to get stuck with a hairstyle that re-
quires a Blood Magic Sacrifice to maintain.
So for the love of hair, please, take the time to talk, talk, talk with your
stylist before you sit down.
Celebrities are sooooo cute. But yeah, they also tend to have hair and
make-up teams. Pinterest and sites like CurlyNikki.com are your best
bet for finding pictures of real-world hairstyles you can maintain without
someone following you around all day and adjusting every curl.
Another thing you should fantasize about? Not liking it. What will you
do if you don’t love the hairstyle or cut you asked for? I mean beyond
mumbling good-bye, fake smiling and feeling resentful as you pay with
a tip for a hairstyle you don’t love?
You can either take a deep breath and figure out exactly what you don’t
love about it, or….
You can give it three days. Time and compliments often give a curly
enough perspective to go from feeling gypped to loving her new look.
77
CHOPPED
RED FLAGS
YOU MIGHT NEED TO FIND A NEW STYLIST IF…
» You tell your hairdresser what you want and she just says,
“Okay,” and goes to work without giving you any plan of
action. Trust, Oprah’s stylist discusses every single change
with her beforehand.
» She says she can do something you’ve never asked for
before (like braid extensions or coloring), but has no pic-
tures or references of/for her work. You do not want to
pay top dollar to be someone’s hair school experiment.
» You’ve never met this hair stylist before, but she sounds
distracted on the phone when you make the appoint-
ment and she doesn’t ask you to come in for any kind of
consultation.
» She has zero right answers when you ask her the follow-
ing questions: Have you ever cut curly hair before? Do
you cut curly hair dry or wet? Do you straighten with
heat before you cut? The answer key, just in case you
don’t already know, should be: Yes, dry*, and no.
*There are arguments for both, but many Curlies are of the strong opin-
ion that stylists should cut your clean, moisturized and dried hair. That
way they can see the shrinkage and how your curls fall. Cutting wet curls
doesn’t take shrinkage (especially non-uniform shrinkage) into account
However, if u wear your hair curly and straight, cutting dry, blown-out
hair is usually the route stylists take. When I micro-trim or dust, I do it
on dry hair and then immediately moisturize and seal.
78
STAND UP FOR YOUR CURLY KID
If after a couple of days, you still are in total hate with this style….
79
CHOPPED
RED FLAGS
YOU MIGHT NEED TO FIND A NEW STYLIST IF…
»» S/he tries to play the blame game even though you are
not.
»» S/he only comes up with one solution and seems loathe
to consider any you have. Some people love and trust
“genius” hairstylists who tell them exactly what to do.
You have to decide if you trust your stylist enough to put
up with this potentially patronizing personality trait.
»» S/he can’t make the time to talk with you about this, is
doing 20 million other things during the discussion or is
unwilling, or unavailable to communicate at all.
If you’ve never had a problem with this stylist before, she might be able
to fix the hair issue, and then you can both move on. However, if you
keep on having problems with your stylist and she’s making it rain red
flags consider…
80
QUESTION #2: I SHAVED ONE SIDE OF MY HEAD LIKE A
YEAR AGO, AND NOW I’M SICK OF IT. HOW DO I GROW MY
HAIR OUT WITHOUT IT LOOKING COMPLETELY CRAY?
IT IS SO, VERY HARD TO LOOK AT THE LATEST STYLE AND NOT WANT
TO LIVE THAT CHIC LIFE. AS VERSATILE AS NATURAL HAIR IS, IT
CAN START TO FEEL A LITTLE LIKE BEING IN SAME HAIR JAIL AFTER
AWHILE.
So, when you have the chance to escape into a trendy new cut, a few of
us make the decision to break free from our current set up of locks.
But all trends must go as they come, and often we find ourselves wanting
our old style back—or just the ability to wear a style other than the one
we thought was so fresh when we got it. Whether you, like me, found
your new style just wasn’t what you’d imagined it would be, or if you
simply want to change it up again, here’s your definitive guideline…
81
STYLE INSPIRATIONS
1 2 3
5
9
10
8
6
82
1. Head Wrap or Head Scarf 2. Braid Out 3. Boho Braid 4. Top Knot 5. Flower Crown
6. Bantu Knots 7. Cornrows 8. High Bun 9. Braids 10. Side Twist
HOW TO GROW OUT EVERYTHING
83
84
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6 Use the previous small section that was clipped away and
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PART THE OTHER WAY
Creative parting isn’t just for balding men. Twisting and
styling your hair so that it covers the shaved part(s) is a
great way to cover your short side until it’s done growing
out.
CUT IT OFF
It takes about five years for most naturals to grow a new
head of curls. It might take the same amount of time for
your shaved side to “catch up” to the rest of your hair.
Some Curlies find it easier and a little more fun to simply
start over again. It’s kind of like deciding to take the same
journey twice. On one hand, you’ve already gone to this
place, on the other, you now know what and how to han-
dle all the twists and turns. In either case, if you decide to
Big Chop out of your current cut, definitely stick around
for the next question.
92
You have to realize that in the long run, a consultation will actually save
you both time and money. If the stylist has issues with timeliness, clean-
liness, or is just not a personality match, a consultation will tell you
that. Also, you can screen for potential red flags with these interview
questions:
This also gives you a chance to screen the shop itself. I’ll tell you, I’ve
been to some hole-in-the-wall shops that turn out a mean head. But
there’s a difference between being a hole in the wall and unsanitary—
figure out if this person’s shop crosses the line. Also, a consultation gives
you a chance to get a feel for the environment. If you’re a quiet person
who doesn’t like a lot of raucous laughter, you’ll want to know sooner
than later if this place is basically a scene from Barbershop.
Most of all, if you don’t love the shop or the stylist, you can simply walk
away without leaving any hair or money on the table. Let’s face it, some
of us just were not born bold, and it’s a lot easier to walk away from a
consultation with a stylist than an official appointment you made weeks
ago.
TEAMWORK, TEAMWORK!
Can’t find a decent stylist in your town? Or does your stylist know how
to do A & C, but not B? This is great time to consider splitting up your
hair duties.
If you can’t find one stylist who can cut, color, and style, consider finding
one who can color and another who can cut, and then styling yourself
at home with all the great tutorials you can find on trustworthy sites like
CurlyNikki.com.
93
CHOPPED
94
SCARVES AND HEADBANDS
These two accessories not only give you the look you were
originally going for with bangs, but they also keep you look-
ing awesome no matter where you’re at in the grow out pro-
cess.
95
CHOPPED
HORMONES
are a huge factor when it comes to hair texture. They’re the main reason
why that high school nerd returns a foot taller with a lustrous afro after a
summer away. And they’re the number one reason for hair texture chang-
es. If your hair is suddenly dry and brittle, get your thyroid checked out
or…open your medicine cabinet, because…
GRAY HAIR
can also contribute to texture changes. It often grows in at texture that
just doesn’t match the rest of your hair.
96
AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST, THERE’S OUR OLD ENEMY,
OVER-STYLING
If your curls are dry and brittle after too much heat and/or chemical
damage, no worries. Simply giving your hair a break while you pay atten-
tion to moisture retention will help it bounce back in no time.
Whatever the reason, you had to big chop. Chances are even without the
texture change you’re going to look a lot different.
HEADGEAR
Beanies, headbands wide-brimmed hats, goddess chains, and
headwraps—there are so many options out there. Find yours
and pair it with a fantastic set of big earrings.
97
CHOPPED
If your curls are now tighter and you’re looking to naturally elongate
your locks, try hair masks and adding olive oil to your conditioner until
your hair is long enough to put in stretching styles like braids and twists.
BUT if you want to simply embrace your new tighter texture, which I
highly recommend, just keep your shorties moisturized. Deep condition-
ing treatments are even more important now if you want your shorn
locks to grow. Remember, heavier butter-based products with water as
the first ingredient (richer products) and the oils listed above, will make
your wash-n-gos shine!
Last but not least, if you big chopped for any reason other than com-
pletely wanting to, I want to encourage you to embrace your new look.
98
WHAT’S NEXT
But wait, what if your hair texture isn’t just
changed, but completely thinner?
99
100
WHEN Good HAIR GOES THIN
A LOT OF WOMEN RUN STRAIGHT TO THE WIG SHOP WHEN THEY NO-
TICE THEY’RE STARTING TO THIN A BIT UP TOP. BUT NOT US. WE’RE
FEARLESS—AND WHEN WE’RE NOT FEELING FEARLESS, WE FAKE IT
UNTIL WE MAKE IT.
In this section let’s talk about the subject we never, ever dare to bring
up—not even at the most loving family reunions—thinning hair. And
also porosity and weather, because why not?
MY PROMISE TO YOU
After you finish reading this section…
»» You’ll know how to prevent and what to do about THIN-
NING HAIR.
»» DRY, LIFELESS HAIR will become a vague concept,
somebody you used to know.
»» Your hair will look great on VACATION and in any
kind of WEATHER.
101
QUESTION #1: MY HAIR IS THINNING! WHY IS THIS HAP-
PENING TO ME? WHY, NIKKI, WHY?
If you’re actually shedding and losing more hair than usual, keep on
reading. If your hair has become less dense and overly fine, see my special
box “Fine Hair Take Care.”
If you’re sure that you’re losing hair, you must determine if your hair is
thinning or damaged. There’s a huge difference between the two.
Questions to ask yourself: Are you abusing chemicals (dyes and relax-
ers), heat, or over-manipulative styles? Are you super-stressed out or on
a medication that might be affecting your hormone balance? Is there any
chance at all that your thyroid is out of whack?
If your answer to all of the above is no, then you’ll want to do one more
check. Next time you lose a hair, take a good look at it. If the hair strand
is broken off in a shorter section, then it’s probably just hair damage.
However, if that bad girl has a root attached—sorry to say, that could be
real hair loss.
And hair loss can usually be tied to one or two factors: Genetics and Age.
102
IF IT’S AGE…
This is a great time to talk to your doctor about getting on a multivita-
min that contains Vitamin A, C, E, and a B complex. All of these vita-
mins are reported to help with overall health and hair growth.
Also, talk to your doctor about Biotin and MSM. Biotin promotes cell
growth, the production of fatty acids, and metabolism of fats—all of
which benefit your scalp. MSM lengthens the hair growth phase—this
basically means more hair kept on your head and therefore less shedding.
So, if you’re looking into any kind of hair vitamin, make sure it contains
these two ingredients.
However, you also need to remember that all the vitamins in the world
won’t stimulate hair growth if you’re not taking care of yourself in every
way. See page 112 for my Better Than Good Life Regimen, and make
sure you’re covered in every area of your well-being.
If your hair is thinning, switch your focus from styling to products that
keep your hair and scalp healthy. A slicked-back bun is lovely, but a
healthy, moisturized wash-n-go with well-defined curls keeps you ahead
of thinning locks. So...
103
PRODUCTS TO AVOID
»» Gels and stiff stylers
»» Dyes
»» Shampoos with sulfates (they strip the hair of
moisture and oil)
»» Oils that weigh your hair down
»» Towels (microfiber or regular)
»» Combing or brushing your hair when it’s
dry
»» Any kind of heat-styling
CHOOSE INSTEAD
»» Leave-In Creams and Soft-Hold Cream Sty-
lers
»» Henna
»» Lighter oils (Argan, Almond, Avocado, Grape-
seed and Jojoba are my own fine hair faves)
»» Air-drying your hair or using an old t-shirt
»» Combing your hair when it is soaking wet
with conditioner
»» Pre-poos, Deep Conditioners, and Protein
Treatments
104
STEP AWAY FROM THE WIG
Ironically, the time when many women reach for wigs and
weaves is when they should most be avoided. Wigs and
weaves might mask your thinning hair issues, but they also
exacerbate the problem by raising the temperature on your
scalp, adding tension, an opening you up to all sorts of other
scalp problems like infection and certain fungi.
AVOID THESE
»» Wigs, weaves, and overly-manipulative hair-
styles.
CHOOSE INSTEAD
»» Wearing your hair out and low-maintenance
styles like roller sets and wash-n-gos.
105
NATURAL REMEDIES
FOR THINNING HAIR
106
HERBAL AND TEA RINSES
Herbal and tea rinses are GREAT for thinning hair.
Many of these teas contain anti-inflammatory, an-
ti-viral, and anti-microbial properties which will
help fight off potential scalp ailments associated
with thinning hair.
»» Horsetail tea stimulates blood vessels in the
scalp, which promotes the growth of new
hair.
»» Stinging nettle tea inhibits the production
of DHT, the hormone responsible for both
male and female pattern baldness.
»» Green and Black Tea both have high caf-
feine content. Caffeine stimulates the hair
shaft and helps it grow faster by blocking
DHT.
107
FINE HAIR
TAKE CARE
SCALP MASSAGE
The more hair you can stimulate to grow, the
thicker it will look, so do this on the regular. I
use a scalp massaging tool while iPhoning and
Boom! Big Bawse Hair While Doing Big Bawse
Things.
SIGNATURE TWIST-N-CURL
Rolling the ends of my twists or braids gives my
hair a ton of volume with the illusion of same-
length bluntness. Win-win for both bulk and
bounce. Also, roller sets, like rod sets are amaz-
ing for added volume and texture.
109
110
HOW OUR CURLS AGE
20’S
Strong and thick curls. Scalp produces enough sebum, which gives hair
a healthy shine
30’S
Due to a decline in sebum, hair starts to lose luster. Any damage done in
your 20s really starts to show.
40’S
Hair shaft starts to shrink, making it thinner and more fragile. A decline
in melanin levels means more gray.
50’S
50% of women gray by this age and follicles continue to shrink, making
your hair finer and thinner.
60’S
Nearly 40% of women will have some degree of hair loss by age 60.
LAST WORDS
IN THE END, THINNING HAIR IS A NATURAL PART OF AGING. EM-
BRACE YOUR HAIR AT EVERY STAGE AND FOCUS MORE OF TAKING
CARE OF YOURSELF THAN ON HIDING IT. AS I OFTEN SAY LOVE YOUR
HAIR, BUT DO NOT LET IT DEFINE YOU. YOU DEFINE YOU. AND IF
YOU’RE HAPPY AND HEALTHY IN EVERY OTHER ASPECT OF YOUR
LIFE, TRUST YOUR CROWN WILL BE GLORIOUS, NO MATTER YOUR
AGE.
111
THIN
DAILY:
»» Eat delicious things (fried stuff with cheese and bacon,
AND cakes, cookies and pies!) in moderation with limits
on my milk and wheat intake. I don’t deprive myself of
anything and I don’t buy anything that says ‘fat-free’’. I
eat real, whole foods and get my whole, entire life, every
day! It’s all about balance.
»» Read or listen to uplifting things throughout the day. It’s
the only way you’ll remember to remember what’s im-
portant—your happiness. Not the fake kind, but the real,
genuine kind that’s not tied to things of this world. You
must make your relationship with yourself, the kingdom
within, your light, your TOP priority. The dope thing is
that while you’re busy enjoying the happiness that you
are (despite your present circumstances), the worldly
things that you enjoy (the bae, the houses, the cars), will
112
show up effortlessly and perfectly for you. So be about
your light like nothing else matters, ‘cause it doesn’t.
»» No face make-up unless I’m on TV or in another fancy
situation. Just… SPF moisturizer, lipstick, and natural
glow.
»» A glass of wine at night. Although after my most recent
trip to Brazil, I’m enjoying the occasional beer.
WEEKLY:
»» Wash and detangle sessions with Deep Conditioner
»» Lunch with a Friend or Date Night with Hubby
»» 20-60 Hours of Work I Find Fulfilling (only do shit you
believe in)
YEARLY:
»» Travel somewhere I’ve never been
»» Numerous overnight dates with hubby (after getting
Grandma and PaPa on deck)
»» 2-3 New projects that scare me
As you can see, though my current career is based around hair, both my
career and hair are based around my ultimate Life. Get your Life Right
and everything else—including your health, and hair will follow.
113
THIN
114
THERE ARE THREE LEVELS OF POROSITY
LOW-POROSITY HAIR
Tends to be the driest of the three types because its tightly-packed
cuticle makes it difficult for liquid to enter or get fully absorbed
into the hair strand. This kind of hair is basically closing itself off
to conditioning love, which makes keeping it well-moisturized a
job for sure.
115
THIN
MEDIUM-POROSITY HAIR
This hair is healthy, bouncy, and strong. It’s the absolute best, and what
every curly should strive for.
HIGH-POROSITY HAIR
This is hair with cuticle layers that are broken, missing, or hole-ridden.
This type of hair is especially frustrating because it lets in too much mois-
ture then releases it too quickly—thus that feeling that your hair is just
eating moisture.
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SIGNS THAT YOUR HAIR IS HIGH POROSITY:
» It becomes immediately saturated when you add water
on wash day.
» Your hair dries in a matter of minutes.
» Lotions and milks fade into your hair and are never heard
from again.
Okay, now that we’ve fully covered hair porosity, let’s move on to the
next question to figure out how to get back your shine, no matter what.
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THIN
This is why some Curlies swear by protective styles during this season,
tucking their hair away and not releasing it into the public until Daylight
Savings Time has been turned off, but if you’re not necessarily looking to
get extensions, never fear.
2. OIL IT UP
Oil is important every month of the year, but even more so
during the colder months. Here are some of my favorite oils
for the winter months:
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» Coconut Oil (perfect for pre-pooing and finger detangling,
but might harden during the winter months. Simply scoop
and warm between your hands for easier application)
» Extra Virgin Olive Oil (this natural emollient is great for pro-
moting scalp health and deep conditioning)
» Avocado Oil (heals and prevents brittle hair with its high fatty
acid count)
» Shea Butter (soothes dry and irritated scalp and leaves your
strands feeling soft)
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6. MAKE A REFRESHER SPRAY
Simply combine water, leave-in conditioner, your favorite oil
and some aloe vera juice in a spray bottle and refresh your
curls with a nice light mist of moisture about every four to
five hours and right before you go to bed. Your hair will
thank you for the extra moisture.
Last, but not least, a good Cream will not only moisturize,
but also seal the oil and water to the hair shaft. I love raw
shea butter for this step, but creamy leave-ins also come
highly recommended.
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SO THAT’S HOW TO KEEP YOUR HAIR FRESH AND BEYOND AWESOME
IN THE WINTER. HOW ABOUT THE OTHER SEASONS? EACH MONTH
COMES WITH ITS OWN SET OF CHALLENGES, SO READ ON TO FIND
OUT HOW TO STAY FLY IN WINTER, SUMMER, SPRING, AND FALL.
SUMMERTIME
is the right time for many curlies. Not only do you get to bust out your
best outfits without having to cover them up with a coat, all that Vitamin
D is fantastic for your hair, health, and general outlook on life. Here are
some of our best tips for the summer months….
»» Use lighter oils.
»» Air-dry your hair.
»» Refrigerate your leave-in (it smooths the cuticle and feels
great going on).
»» Don’t even bother with heat-styling (save yourself some
frustration during these humid and/or dry months).
»» Consider a low-viscosity hair gel that spreads easily as
your primary styling tool for the summer.
»» Drink lots and lot of water (if you’re dehydrated, your
hair will also become dry and brittle. So drink up to pre-
vent summer breakage).
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THIN
If you hate or can’t fit your hair under swim caps wet your hair with water
and coat it in oil to prevent your hair from absorbing chlorinated or salt
water. Then, after you swim, wash your hair with a clarifying shampoo and
condition with a quick rinse. Don’t bother with deep conditioning, simply
massage some oil to your ends and enjoy the rest of your vacation.
FALL
Oh, the leaves do get their pretty on in some places, but that wind will kill
a curl. This season more than any other is a great time to get your braiding
game on lock and employ scarves and other safe accessories like ouchless
scrunchies, combs, and banana clips that will keep your hair exactly where
you want it to be. Bobby pins and a good pomade are also great tools to
have on hand during these months.
SPRING
The air is cool and crisp—but not drying. There’s a dampness in the air,
but it’s not humid. Spring can be the best time of year for Curlies, but ugh!
RAIN!!! This is when you want to break out your frizz-busters. Mousses
and gels with polyquaterniums will keep your styles pretty even when the
rain doesn’t want you to be great.
ON HUMIDITY
Humidity dragging down your curls? Break out the natural butters, con-
ditioning treatments, pomades and leave-ins with humectants, which pro-
mote moisture retention by attracting water molecule out of the humid air
and binding them to your hair strands. Some ingredients to look for when
you’re doing your summer product shopping:
»» Hydrolyzed proteins (Elastin, Collagen, Silk, and Keratin)
»» Diols and Triols (Glycols, Glycerin, Erythrito, Glucose,
Xylitol, and Hexanediol)
»» Ethers (Isoceteth-x, Laneth-s, Steareth-x, Silicone)
»» Biological Humectants (Panthenol, Sodium PCA, Hyal-
uronic Acid, Inositol, Glycogen)
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WHAT’S NEXT
I know, I know! But what about the Curlies
favorite summer and winter go-to?
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WHEN Good HAIR GOES SUPERHERO
MY PROMISE TO YOU
After you finish reading this section…
» You’ll know the best way to go about GROWING OUT
and PROTECTING your hair with extensions.
» You’ll have a few bangin’ go-to PROTECTIVE STYLES
under your (satin or silk lined) hat.
» You’ll know how to deal when your superhero protective
style…goes to the darkside.
Hans Zimmer, cue up my superhero music, because this good hair about
to get SAVED!
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SUPERHERO
I won’t go into all of this again since I’ve pretty well covered it in the last
few chapters. But if you’re constantly straightening and manipulating
your hair or otherwise abusing it while you “wait for it to grow out,” then
there’s your culprit.
The truth is, I rarely get emails from Curlies that say, “I did everything
right and deep conditioned every week for a year and my hair barely
grew.” Most times simply making the switch to protective or
low-manipulations styles will get your hair growing (or length reten-
tion, rather) regimen back on track.
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EXTENSIONS
So many curlies have strong opinions about their hair, and strangely
enough, even stronger opinions about other curlies’ hair. But if you’re
your own hair hero’s journey—as opposed to say, starring in someone
else’s action movie, it’s up to you and only you to decide which protective
style is best for you.
If your hair is on the shorter side, braids, twists and other sorts of exten-
sions might just be the sidekick you need to grow your hair out. Why?
Because they’re long-term styles, which will keep your hair protected
while its busy growing. Here are some of our favorite long term protec-
tive sidekicks…
KINKY TWISTS
Kinky Twists have become a super popular way to protect your hair
during the winter months.
» Pros: They can last up to eight weeks. And oh my gosh,
they are so low maintenance. It will probably take you
longer to decide how to style your hair then to actually
put it up or leave it down in the morning. Also, the bulky
nature of the twists makes them kind of perfect for the
winter. Like wearing a hat that keeps your head warm
and goes with everything.
» Cons: Kinky Twists are very low maintenance, but they
do require many hours of installation time—anywhere
from six to sixteen hours depending on whether or not
you choose to put them in yourself. Also, the hair is so
bulky, you pretty much have two options, half up/half
down or all down. So this style can get hot, heavy, bor-
ing, and not so ideal during the summer and while ex-
ercising.
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MARLEY AND HAVANA TWISTS
A lighter alternative to Kinky Twists, you’ll often find these protective
styles blowing up the eastern seaboard during the summer. Havana Hair
is the lighter of the two, so it’s recommended to counteract hair strain.
But it’s also more expensive (nearly three times as much per package as
Marley Hair). And it’s way harder to get than Marley Hair. There’s a good
chance you’ll have to order the extra hair online at least 1-2 weeks before
your twisting appointment if you want to have Havana Twists installed.
»» Pros: Both are versatile. They bun up beautifully and
Marley Hair can be found in just about any beauty sup-
ply store that has extensions. Also, both Havana and
Marley Hair are re-useable. And there are so many good
how-to tutorials on YouTube, this is probably the easiest
of the long-term protective styles to put in yourself. Ka-
ching!
»» Cons: These are the easiest protective styles to put in
yourself, but you’re still looking at nearly a full work-day
of installation time. Droop.
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FAUX LOCS
Locs have been embraced by rappers and academics alike. From Lil’
Wayne to Toni Morrison, there’s just something about this hairstyle that
screams, “totally legit.” So is it any ironic wonder that the faux version is
becoming more and more popular by the day. All the “realness” without
the commitment. Yasss!
»» Pros: Locs are always on-trend, and it’s easy to edge your
look up by adding color with a cheap package of already
dyed Marley Hair. This is a great style for anyone who
not only wants to protect their hair, but also doesn’t
mind getting mistaken for a member of the cool kids
club. At the same time, Faux Locs can be a perfect go-
to for an older curly who already has grey hair—instant
gravitas and length.
»» Cons: Faux Locs are so trendy you might end up having
to put them in yourself. A lot of braid shops just don’t
have them on their lists of services yet, but putting them
in yourself takes quite a while—longer than any other
style on this list. And if you use too much hair, Faux Locs
get real heavy, real fast—not good for your scalp or your
hairline. Also, you know how real locs can fuzz, frizz, and
static cling every piece lint hanging out in your vicinity?
Faux Locs have the exact same problem.
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SUPERHERO
BOX BRAIDS
An enduring classic. I mean, is it even summer until you see somebody
with box braids at the pool? Nay, madam, I think not.
»» Pros: So classic. So easy to style however you want. And
you can safely keep them in for up to 8 weeks. Of all
these styles, this is the least likely to need touch ups, es-
pecially if they’re installed by a professional.
»» Cons: Can get really boring, real fast. If put in too tight,
they will thin out the hair they’re supposed to be protect-
ing and decimate your hairline. And Curlfriend, people
have been talking about the installation time on these
bad girls since the ‘80s.
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In any case, long-term protective styles can be really awesome. They not
only give you whatever length you’ve been craving, but they also allow
you to change up your look as wanted or needed. All while leaving you
with the ability to care for your real hair while it’s hidden away. This
makes long-term protective styles a great alternative for…
» The Perennially Busy
» New Naturals
» Students
» Those in the public eye (actors, musicians, on-air talent,
etc.)
» Chronic Over Manipulators (this is the hair equivalent
to tying your hands down)
Long-term protective styles are also great for traveling, getting you
through those harsh winter months, and breezing you through brutally
hot summer days. These are the kind of styles that will save you in a
pinch, and give you a consistent look you can depend on in any kind of
weather.
But, remember what happened in the first three Star Wars? Trust your
hero style will Darth Vader in an instant if you do not maintain it prop-
erly. So here’s how to keep your post-protective style curl body count low.
Straighten your hair yourself if necessary. Ask your braider if she needs
to straighten your hair beforehand. If she says yes, take that step out of
her hands. Do a protein treatment after you wash your hair. Then blow it
out safely, with a heat protectant (See chapter 3 for further instructions).
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SUPERHERO
Don’t Put Your Style In Too Tight. Talk with your braider about this or
remind yourself as you’re doing your own installation. How do you know
your extensions are too tight? Headaches, severe scalp discomfort, and any
kind of bumps or redness are all signs of a too tight installation.
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AFTER TAKING OUT YOUR STYLE…
This is the time to treat your real hair extra, gentle and nice. It’s been
covered up for a minute, and you should have a little extra hair energy
from all the styling stuff you haven’t had to do over the last 4 to 8 weeks.
So follow these steps to get your hair back in fighting shape:
1. Pre-poo with a product that contains marshmallow root for extra slip
and protection. Night takedowns are the best, because then you can pre-
poo and leave it in overnight.
3. Clarify like Wonder Woman on sink duty at the hair shop. If ever
there’s a time to clarify, this is the one. You’ll want to use a clarifying
shampoo to rid your hair of weeks of product buildup.
4. Add a protein treatment. This will not only strengthen your hair but
help repair any damage the protective style has done to your “real iden-
tity.”
5. Deep Condition with heat. Did you really think I wasn’t going to ad-
vise this? I mean, really? Do you not know me by now?
Every superhero needs her theme music and downtime. Although com-
mon, going straight from a takedown to a new installation is NEVER,
EVER advised. Immediate re-installations can really damage both your
hair and scalp.
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SUPERHERO
Moreover, the need to “not be seen without your hair” might indicate
a potentially unhealthy attachment to your extensions. As the old Zen
saying goes, “You should sit in meditation for 20 minutes a day, unless
you’re too busy, then you sit for an hour.” If you find you can’t give your
hair a few days to breathe, then you really need to give it a few weeks
until you put in another extended style. You want to feel as good about
yourself when you’re rocking your real hair as you do when it’s in exten-
sions or weaves.
Worried about what to do with your hair between long-term styles? Keep
reading!
We moms just don’t have the time to luxuriate like we used to, so that
means coming up with super quick and/or convenient ways to maintain
our fly while protecting our hair.
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NIKKI’S TOP 3 SUPER EASY GROW OUT HAIRSTYLES:
TWIST AND BRAID OUTS IN FRONT OF THE TV
Let’s face it, for most of us, watching TV is a zero sum activity. This is
the time of day when we’re least productive, most likely to thoughtlessly
snack, and studies have shown that watching it all the way up until bed-
time can seriously mess with your sleep*, but no worries, your TV time
can go from zero sum to super productive in an instant if you use it to
set yourself up for hair greatness.
Twist and Braid Outs are perhaps the easiest styles to do without a mir-
ror (that’s why they’re perfect for TV time!). However, twists and braid
outs do come with their share of challenges. Here are a few fixes for the
most common issues with these otherwise super-easy styles.
Wet, Damp, or Dry? Figure it out. Some people are quick to put these
styles into the hairstyle asylum for the criminally disappointing when
they come out less than optimal. I mean who wants to install a twistout
at night only to see less than stellar results when they take it out?
Don’t be so quick to lock this hairstyle up for crimes against your curls.
If your dry twists turn out frizzy, trying twisting on wet hair. If that’s
too flat, try twisting on damp hair. I myself like to twist on damp to dry
hair. It doesn’t last as long as twisting on wet hair, but I get a fuller end
result (less scalp-y). Just remember if you twist on wet hair, give it ample
time to dry before taking it out, or you’ll get limp curls with lots of scalp
showing.
Make sure your hair is thoroughly detangled and smooth before twisting.
Nothing guarantees a frizzier turn out than just mindlessly going in. Use
a paddle brush or wide toothed comb on each section prior to twisting.
*Citation: http://www.webmd.com/sleep-disorders/features/power-down-better-sleep
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SUPERHERO
Don’t depend on the wrong product. If your twist out came out just meh, try
switching up your products – and I do mean products. The ideal twist out em-
ploys a moisturizing product underneath a sealing butter or oil. If you only use
one product to put in your twists, your curls might look dry and thirsty when
you take them down, so make sure to seal them up!
Try flat-twisting your roots. This will give your twist out a more consistent
pattern. Just grab the dominant strand of the section you’re planning to twist
or braid. Section that section into two pieces, and twist them five to six times
before grabbing the other section(s) of hair and twisting or braiding as usual.
The takedown is just as important. It’s a common situation. You leisurely put
in your twists or braids at night, only to rush through the takedown. Totally
understandable, but alas, a rushed takedown can undo all your thoughtful work
and yield poor results. Give yourself at least thirty minutes to take out this style
and remember the holy trinity of takedowns:
This style can be flat-twisted or braided in, but there are so many great tutorials
online, I won’t bother with step-by-step instructions here. Just remember:
136
»» DETANGLE first with a moisturizer and a sealing oil.
»» Use a SAFE SETTING PRODUCT. Think styling pud-
dings and butter based products—not gel.
»» Don’t pull too hard on your edges while putting them
in.
CURLFRIEND SIDENOTE
Want an even more dramatic look, fast? Add Kanekalon hair
to turn your Crown Braids into Goddess Braids! This is like
the one extended protective style that goes in fast, and de-
pending on how cute you sleep, can last anywhere from 2 to
6 weeks. What?!?!
Simply gather all the hair like you’re about to create a low pony, but
instead you tuck the ends and fold them to the center of your head and
then tuck the sides to meet the ends in the middle and pin. This style is
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SUPERHERO
perfect for after you’ve set your hair in rollers, and bonus, it gives you
extra stretch and smoother results.
As you can see, protective styles sure are great. But what happens when
they turn on you? Read on to find out what to do when protective styles
either damage your hair or just don’t seem to be helping it grow.
Earlier I talked about the kind of curly who might benefit best from a
protective style, now let’s dig into who might not…
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THE PERENNIALLY TIME-CHALLENGED.
If you don’t have the time or energy to properly water and maintain your
protective style, it could do more damage than good. Even the quickest
styles should be done on thoroughly detangled hair, or else your hair is
going to hate you when you take it out. Furthermore, you are simply not
going to get away with poor practices like not oiling your hair at night,
skipping deep conditioning treatments, and back-to-back installations.
Main Point: If you’ve tried to grow out your hair with protective styles,
and it just hasn’t worked, then low-manipulation styles are probably your
best bet. Make wash-n-gos and loose twistouts (that you only have to
re-style twice a week) your best friends. I also love finger coils and super
loose bantu knots.
139
No matter what, try not to get discouraged. I know the information
you find in books and online can feel contradictory at times. Extended
protective styles are the best for growing out your hair! Oh no, only
protective styles with your real hair will do! Low manipulation styles for
the win!
Just remember the most important thing is to pay attention to your own
hair, not blindly follow the advice of others. As I’ve said over and over
again this last decade, ‘be your own guru!’.
General rule of awesome hair: if your hair “doesn’t like” a style, let that
style go. Any style that causes you pain or breakage—vanquish it. And if
a style works, rock it! At the end of the day, the way you nurture and take
care of your hair will determine how it grows.
WHAT’S NEXT
I know quite a few of our curly parents are already thinking about trying
out a few of these styles on their curly kids, but are already dreading the
hair battles. I’ve got tips to deal with that and other curly kid issues com-
ing up in the next chapter!
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142
WHEN Good HAIR GOES KIDS
Now, you know I couldn’t leave out of here without talking about the
kids! I get so many questions about these lil’ curly heads. SO many. The
hair struggle is real for us curly kid parents. Read on to learn how to
solve some of the top issues affecting parents who’d rather not have their
children going out into the world, looking a mess.
MY PROMISE TO YOU
After you finish reading this section…
»» You’ll know exactly how to respond when your kid says,
“I HATE MY CURLS!”
»» SUMMER ACTIVITIES will no longer turn your kid’s
hair into a nest.
»» The final bell will be rung on those ugly MORNING
HAIR FIGHTS
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KIDS
Live some place where curlies just don’t abound? Do this randomly when
you’re surfing the internet. If you see someone with a great head of curls,
run don’t walk, to show your daughter her picture and gush all over it.
Seeing you get excited about the potential of her hair will get her excited
about it as well.
* As a melinated momma, she does have a huge Angela Davis fro she likes to play dress up in!
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3. COMPLIMENT HER
Many of us just aren’t liberal with compliments when it comes to our
children. We worry about raising ‘big-headed’, self-absorbed, vain chil-
dren. No one wants to be the mother of that one girl we knew growing
up, who had nothing going for her but her superhuman ability to preen,
but if your child is in a mostly non-curly class and receiving no com-
pliments at home or school, that’s a problem. As parents, we are our
children’s first role models. We are the ones responsible for helping them
form their self-image and identity before society gets a hold of them.
Trust, there is absolutely nothing wrong with telling your child that she
is smart, pretty, and has a beautiful head of hair every single day…or
more!
4. MAKE IT A CHOICE
Help her understand that loving or hating your hair is a choice. Say
something like, “You can choose to dislike your hair, but I think it’s
beautiful, so I’m going to choose to love it.” This is a great way to teach
her about basic self-direction. Help her understand that it is up to her—
not others—to dictate how she perceives herself now, and she’ll be able
to use that lesson for the rest of her life.
5. LEAD BY EXAMPLE
If you’re natural, don’t be afraid to compliment yourself, Mama! Getting
past our own self-consciousness to admire yourself out loud by saying
things like, “My hair looks great!” and “I love my curls” is a great way to
model good hair esteem. If you love yourself and your curls, chances are
your daughter will do the same. Eventually she’ll start complimenting
your curls, too. Seriously, you have no idea how much better a good hair
day becomes when you get a breakfast table compliment from your curly
hair loving daughter. Remember our children emulate us. They play in
our shoes, try on our clothes, and in the early years, we’re their biggest
heroes. Making sure your child’s biggest hero loves herself out loud is a
great way to ensure she does the same for her children someday.
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KIDS
Gia loves my hair so much that she often wants to rock the same styles.
So when I get the, ‘can I wear it down today?’, this is our compromise;
I love that she loves her hair *pats self on back* and want her to experience
it in all of its curly glory, but all I can think is, ‘but who’s gonna detangle
it, tho?’ So here’s our regimen for this look:
»» Start with stretched hair (an old twist or braid-out or
an old roller-set will do ya. I keep her stretched hair in
French braids or twisted ponytails at all times, so it’s usu-
ally detangled. If not, I use my fingers and a light oil)
»» Grab medium-sized sections (ain’t got no time for parts)
and twist using raw shea butter
»» Take a twist, lightly wet the very end and twirl around
your finger to create a coil/curl using your favorite curl
cream. This creates a nice, neat finish and keeps the twists
from unraveling. Repeat with the remaining twists.
»» Rock a satin scarf or bonnet at night to keep the situation
laid.
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147
KIDS
148
PROTECTIVE STYLES
If you don’t love cornrows or your child’s hair just doesn’t hold them all
that well, consider protective styles like flat twists and two-strand twists.
These styles look great and hold up to lots of play! Worried about sweat?
Don’t be! Some of the same components in sweat, like lactate and urea,
can be also be found in skin lotions. And sweat has a few properties that
might actually help you ward off certain micro-organisms. So let your
child sweat away, and save yourself some frustration by skipping any
hairstyle (press and curls, flat irons, etc) that can be sweated out.
CURLY FISH
Ugh! Swim days! They make the kiddos so happy, but chlorine is a total
hair destroyer. So here’s what to do you do if your child is attending a
summer camp that clocks major pool time.
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KIDS
Step 4: SWIM!!!
This will be the step she likes the most.
Step 5: Rinse hair in the shower until you no longer smell any chlorine.
If your daughter is doing this step herself, let her know in the firmest
way possible that she shouldn’t come home to you smelling like chlorine.
That’s an easy way for both you and her to know she’s doing this step
properly.
Step 8: Brush down any loose hairs and put her in a scarf.
If you won’t see your daughter until later that night, simply spray in
more leave in conditioner and do this step at home.
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FUN—NOT DAMAGE—IN THE SUN
The sun is absolutely great for so many things—hair and skin
not so much. Put sunscreen on yourself and your children
during the summer months and also get into the following
habits:
»» Wear wide-brimmed hats when she can—
these protect both her face and her hair!
»» Leave the conditioner in. The sun breaks
down the hair’s protein, so leaving in the con-
ditioner during the summer months will help
keep sun damage to a minimum.
»» Stay away from products with alcohol, perox-
ide and lemon. These three agents will dry her
hair out even faster in the summer.
»» Sunscreen your hair. Protect your hair like you
protect your skin. Simply dilute your favor-
ite SPF25 or more sunscreen with water in a
spray bottle. Shake it up and spray it on your
child’s hair daily.
151
KIDS
But try out these Hair Fight Busters to End the Civil War….
152
4. SIMPLY DON’T RESPOND.
It sounds like a cruel suggestion to just ignore your child when she’s cat-
erwauling about the terrible things you’re doing to her so very pitifully.
But children sometimes feed off of negative attention. Try just ignoring
the complaints for 5 days straight. Chances are, without any response
from you, the whining will die an attention-starved death.
5. AFTER… THEN…
You don’t have to be mean about this, just simply make getting her hair
done a step toward doing or getting whatever it is your child wants to do
or have next. Start using this method with high value items on the week-
end, when the stakes are low. For example, “As soon as we do your hair,
we’ll leave for Zahali’s party!” or “Sure, you can play with my iPad—right
after we do your hair.” Don’t bother arguing with your kid, just make
hair a natural first step on the path to getting what he or she wants.
I’m so glad that I’m ending this book with a section about children. As a
curly mom, I know for sure that our children are the future. If we teach
them to love and take care of their curls today, they’ll never be dependent
on a stylist to make their hair look great! I also love that by teaching our
children about their hair, we’re also teaching them to be independent
and even more importantly, hold themselves in good esteem.
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CONGRATULATIONS!
You made it to the end. Between school, work, family, and adulting,
finding the time to read a book is hard these days.
For some of you, this might be your first step on the natural hair journey.
For others, it was simply another affirmation and assurance that you’re
doing the right thing for you. For others still, this book is simply a quick
pocket reference for your hair woes. Being natural isn’t always easy, and
it’s important for you to know that. But whatever challenges you’re strug-
gling with, you have the ability to overcome them.
155
to do before. I’m here to help you enhance it, and surround you amongst
millions of Curlfriends around the world who are all struggling with the
same thing. Because when you believe you look good, there’s a much
better chance that you feel good.
I still can’t believe that it’s been 10 years since we started this journey. I
was away at college at an institution that was diversity-challenged. Can
we say… struggle. When the first thing you do after getting on campus
is search for a ‘Black’ beauty salon and you find there isn’t one. Can we
say... struggle. When the “ethnic section” is only two shelves long, and
they’re down to the last conditioner, and the shampoo is on backorder
for the next two weeks. Finally, let the church say...struggle. When you’ve
checked online, the store said it was in stock, only to get there and they
can’t locate the product. (Pulls out phone, calls in sick to work. Grabs a
pint of ice cream to go, binge watches How To Get Away With Murder
reruns). This might still be the reality for some, but we’ve come so far
since then.
Two beautiful girls, 19 and 21 not too long ago became the youngest
women (Black too) to open a beauty supply in the state of California.
You know where they found the confidence to do that? You. So if you
ever felt like you’ve needed me to survive this everyday struggle, know
that I need you just as much, if not more. (Cues that scene from Lean on
Me where the students sing ‘Fair Eastside’)
Before I head out though, I have to ask a small favor from you. For this
moment, I need you to put down your drink, your rat-tail comb and
your baby (Please don’t drop your baby). Okay, you ready? Cool. Listen
up. Regardless of where you are on this journey, promise me this one
thing. That no matter why or what influenced you to start, that this hair
journey becomes a personal journey for you. As your hair grows, (literally
and figuratively) you have to grow with it. I don’t care how many com-
pliments you got at the day party this past weekend. None of it really
matters if you didn’t wake up to do you for you. How does that J. Cole
line go? “No such thing as a hair that’s better than yours”? (Okay, I added
156
my own little twist.) When you wake up everyday, ask yourself where
your source of happiness comes from. Ask yourself, what can I do in this
very moment to become a better me. Now go do it!
Please consider this (my second book) my gift to you, and I sincere-
ly hope you’ve gotten something valuable out of it. Its’ production has
been a labor of love and I offer it to you in that same loving spirit. Your
support means the world to me, and I mean that from the bottom of my
heart. So thank you, thank you, thank you!
Signed,
NIKKI WALTON
157
Photo Credits:
Page 68: Danielle V.
Page 69: (Left) Ashley H. (Right) Tessa J.C.
Page 82: 1. Nicolette F. 2. Emijaa J. 3. Amanda S. 4. Kristin R. 5. Tiffany W. 6. Kenisha D. 7. Sephora G.
8. Ashley H. 9. Juliette S.F. 10. Jessica W.
When
good
hair
goes
bad
The revolution continues. And as wars go, there will
be casualties. As the #1 AUTHORITY ON NATURAL
used to be a glamorous hair-do can quickly become a Cover credits: Dr. Eugene Walton Junior
hideous hair-don’t, won’t or can’t. Back Cover Jewelry Credits: Diamond’s Direct Richmond, VA
A necessary follow up to her NAACP Image Award nominated, bestselling book, BETTER
THAN GOOD HAIR, the new WHEN GOOD HAIR GOES BAD, will arm women with
the knowledge they need to re-moisturize, refortify, regrow and recover from any
occasionally, that means broken, thinning, damaged, mal-shaped hair that is in need of
TLC. “When Good Hair Goes Bad” is the comprehensive guide to any and all natural hair
product recommendations and solutions for every natural hair issue imaginable, will
make this a page-turning companion for any woman who has ever screamed “I HATE MY
HAIR!”
Nikki Walton is a licensed psychotherapist with a master’s degree in Psychology from the
University of North Carolina and the founder of CurlyNikki.com. She was born in Fort
Walton, Florida and now resides in Washington DC.