Chapter Forty

"ALL THESE YEARS, I thought he took you to kill you."

Though said hollowly, it was also the first indication that Helga was starting to believe them. Yet
the news was apparently still too much of a shock to her for her to express any joy.
Alana managed to get Helga to sit on the sofa again. Christoph offered her a handkerchief for the
tears before he stood back, not taking a seat himself. But after initially wiping her face with the
handkerchief, Helga discarded it in her lap and didn't seem aware that an occasional tear still
rolled down her cheeks.
Alana sat next to her, even tried to hold her hand reassuringly. But she felt Helga tense at her
touch, so she took her hand away.
She was feeling a bit rejected by then. Her own brief burst of happiness, when she'd seen the
laughing Helga, was gone. Nothing about this reunion was happy—yet. But Alana was still
hopeful that once the shock wore off, it would become joyful for both of them.
Some explanation might help in that regard, so Alana said, "He did take me for that reason. He
just couldn't do it and raised me instead. He changed because of it. He's no longer an assassin."
"He was an assassin?" Helga gasped.
"Didn't you think so?" Christoph asked.
Helga's eyes dropped immediately to her lap. She obviously didn't like looking at Christoph. He
was an official, and he'd been sharp with her.
After a moment Helga said, "Yes, but only you have confirmed it, no one else did."
"He's been like a father to me," Alana assured her mother. "In fact, all these years I thought we
were related by blood, that he was my real uncle. He only told me the truth last month."
Helga's eyes flared wide. "He's still alive?"
"Yes, but—"
Helga glanced frantically at the door behind Christoph. "Is he here in the chalet?"
Her fear of Poppie was obvious. Fear instead of hatred for the man who'd stolen her daughter?
Alana wondered. She noticed that Christoph was frowning, too.
Alana quickly said, "I'm sure what happened all those years ago terrified you. It's all right, you
don't ever have to meet him. Tell me about my father."
Helga's brown eyes came back to Alana, but the fear didn't leave them, not all of it. "He was a
good man. We weren't even married a year before he died of fever, so he never got to see our
baby." As an afterthought Helga added, "He had black hair."
Alana chuckled. "Finally a relative with black hair! That's been such a bone of contention—with
him." She nodded toward Christoph.
"Why?"
"Because I tried to convince Captain Becker I was the princess, which is who my guardian
thought I was. And the captain couldn't tell me why he knew that wasn't so. But because of the
color of my hair, and your description of me that I was blond, too, like the princess, he didn't
once consider that I could be your daughter instead."
"Perhaps the assassin lied to you and you aren't my daughter," Helga said.
That hurt. Helga had even said it bitterly. That could only mean one thing. Helga still had doubts,
most likely, because she felt absolutely nothing for Alana. Alana couldn't even blame her for it.
Christoph had had the same thought, that Poppie had lied to her.
Christoph said as much, "I thought the same thing at first, but not anymore. If I still had doubts, I
wouldn't have brought her here to be reunited with you with the king's permission, of course.
Your reaction to her is, however, curious."
"If you say she's mine, then she's mine!" Helga cried defensively. "I just don't feel it yet, nor can
you blame me for that. It was my baby that was taken from me. You bring me a full-grown
woman who doesn't even look like me!"
"Does she look like your husband?"
Helga scoffed. "There is nothing of a man in her."
"No, there isn't," he agreed. "Perhaps you should just be pleased she turned out so beautiful?"
Helga gave him an odd look before she glanced at Alana again and gave her a weak smile. "You
are very beautiful. Please don't blame me for my feelings."
"No, I don't," Alana said. "I completely understand. All my life, I thought my parents were dead.
When I was told that wasn't so, it was a shock to me, too. It took me a while to believe it. It
helped to talk about it, though, and that might make this easier for you as well. Tell me about our
family."
Helga sighed. "They're all gone now. Both my parents were still alive when I moved to the
palace, but they were old. I came to them late in life. My father died the same year that I lost my
baby. My mother moved here to the chalet to be with me, but she died two years ago. I'm sorry,
there is only me—and you—left."
"You don't need to be sorry," Alana said, then asked carefully, "Can you tell me why you did it,
why you switched the babies?"
Helga immediately tensed. "I was warned never to speak of that."
Christoph interjected, "When we realized who she is, the king gave me permission to tell her the
truth and bring her here to you, so she already knows the secret you were to keep. You may speak
freely to her."
Helga started to cry again, but now Alana understood why. Helga wouldn't be able to remember
that awful time without feeling the anguish over losing her child. Alana thought about changing
the subject. She didn't really need to know what had prompted an action that had completely
changed her own life. But maybe Helga was reluctant to discuss it because she thought Alana
had suffered, being raised by an assassin.
"I've had a good life with no hardships whatsoever," Alana assured her. "I was raised to be a lady
in England. I had a fine education, servants, friends, a loving relative—at least that's what I
thought he was. I've never lacked for anything except a mother. So nothing horrible happened to
me because of what you did. Truly, I bear you no resentment for anything."
"I do," Helga said abjectly.
"Then why did you do it?"
Christoph asked it this time, which could be why Helga answered immediately now. "I became
nervous with the palace nearly empty, the king away too long in his grief, and no one even
coming to visit the princess. The truth is the princess was neglected. Only three years had passed
since the civil war when the palace had been attacked and King Ernest was killed. I wasn't the
only one who thought the Bruslans might try to regain the throne with more violence. There was
speculation about it in the city even before King Frederick married."
"Understandable, but the palace wasn't left undefended," Christoph said.
"You are correct, there were many guards in the ward, but there weren't many inside the palace.
The two guards assigned to the nursery would check it on their rounds only twice each night!
They should have been stationed outside the doors, but they weren't, and they barely even
glanced in the royal bassinet when they did come in, always talking and joking with each other.
But I didn't switch the babies immediately. It was many weeks before my nervousness turned to
fear. The princess was nearly three months old before I did it."
"Were the servants aware of your ruse?" Christoph asked.
"What servants?" Helga scoffed. "There was just one old woman with failing eyesight who came
to clean the rooms and bring me meals. The court physician came once a month to check that the
princess was healthy and growing normally. But he was an arrogant man who seemed insulted to
have been given the task of examining an infant. I caught the scent of liquor on his breath more
than once. I begged one of the court officials for more guards and more help. He laughed and
told me the palace was secure, but he did deign to hire another nursemaid to help me. But by the
time she arrived, a couple of weeks before the abduction, I had already taken matters into my
own hands and switched the babies. I was terrified of what would happen to me if anything
happened to the princess."
"Why didn't you tell the new nursemaid that you'd switched the babies so she could be on guard
as well?" Christoph asked.
Helga didn't answer right away. "First, I wasn't sure I could trust her. And the truth is"—she
paused again as her eyes teared up—"I loved being able to spend more time with my own baby."
Alana's heart melted when she heard that.
"Of course, I didn't want the other nursemaid to try the same thing," Helga continued. "The
princess's safety was my paramount concern. Even after the new nursemaid arrived, I kept
hounding that official to give us more guards. Even just two! He could have prevented my loss
by doing so. That—that assassin would never have gotten past guards at the door to take my
baby. I don't even recall being attacked, but after he knocked me out, he must have tied my hands
behind my back." She shook her head sadly. "But the king knew who to blame when he was
summoned back, and he was furious."
"I would have felt it was his fault, for being gone so long," Alana said quietly.
Christoph gave Alana a hard look for saying that, but Helga defended Frederick. "It wasn't. He
assumed he'd left his heir in good hands. And his grief was so deep, he didn't even know he'd
been gone so long. Still, the nursery should have been better protected and had a larger staff.
That's why he was so furious. And people were dismissed because of that neglect, but it was too
late—for me."
"You came here after that?" Alana asked.
Helga nodded. "I was released from my charge because of my loss. A new nursemaid was hired
to travel with the princess to where they hid her. But I stayed with my parents in the city for a
while. They helped me through my grief. I came up here after my father died and was able to talk
my mother into living here with me."
After a moment of silence, Helga hesitantly touched the top of Alana's hand with her fingers and
asked, "Are you really my daughter?"
Alana smiled but didn't get to say anything. Someone was pounding on the door and, so sharply,
Helga started and jumped to her feet in alarm.
"That would be for me," Christoph said, and immediately stepped outside the room.
Alana tried to reassure her mother. "He sent his men here ahead of us yesterday. They probably
just want to make sure he arrived safely through the storm. And his men, they are rather ba—"
She started to say barbaric, but realized Helga might not appreciate that, being Lubinian herself,
so she amended, "Bossy."
That didn't exactly relax Helga enough to get the color back into her pale cheeks. Alana
understood why her mother might fear Poppie, but she hoped Helga wasn't going to feel it every
time there was a knock at her door. Alana thought about arranging a meeting between them. It
wouldn't be pleasant, but Poppie could assure Helga that he'd meant her no harm.
Then Christoph reentered the room, his expression so grim that Alana rose to her feet. He took
Alana's arm and started leading her to the door.
She resisted, pulling back from him. "Don't be so rude. Where are you taking me?"