FACILITATOR GUIDE

Page 2

2011. All rights reserved by Dr. Paul White & Dr. Gary Chapman.

To the leaders of the Apprecia(on at Work training process:

I wanted to write you a brief note of thanks, and of encouragement. Thanks for demonstra<ng
the interest in your team members and your organiza<on by taking the ini<a<ve to show them
how to communicate apprecia<on eec<vely to one another. Being honest, I have been
pleasantly surprised by the results of the training (I am a bit of a skep<c by nature) -- we
consistently have found that the Apprecia(on at Work training has signicant posi<ve impact
on individuals, teams of colleagues, and even whole organiza<ons. I hope you will nd this to
be the case in your organiza<on.

Secondly, I want to encourage you to do three things as you go through the training:

1) Be posi(ve, but realis(c. I have found that giving people realis<c expecta<ons is cri<cal
for success. Can the training really improve work-based rela<onships? Absolutely. Will
the training x every problem or change every person? Clearly not. But the gains made
are real, and make a dierence in everyday life.
2) Be consistent and follow through on the suggested ac(vi(es. If you only half-way go
through the process, you will not get half-way results, you will get none (and probably
nega<ve ones). As a psychologist, I have learned what is needed for behavior to change
and we have built these factors into the training process:
simple, understandable concepts;
a structured process, but one that is exible enough to apply to dierent

situa<ons;
a focus on easily applied ac<ons (along with the tools necessary to do so);
consistent instruc<on and encouragement over <me;
social support from others;
the opportunity to make correc<ons and deal with challenges experienced.

3) Do not become discouraged or dissuaded by the nay-sayers. There will always be

individuals who will bring a nega<ve aRtude to the process, colleagues or supervisors
who think the process is just a bunch of psycho-babble, or team members who will
have excuses why they cant apply the principles in their situa<on. Let them go. You
(most probably) wont change their mind or perspec<ve. But they can undermine your
eorts with your co-workers and cause the training to be ineec<ve. So, nd those who
are posi<ve and suppor<ng and get encouragement from them, and focus on those
colleagues who are at least willing to give it a try. My experience is that, with a bit of
consistent honest eort, people (fairly quickly) begin to have posi<ve interac<ons and
examples to share with others and the posi<ve snowball has begun!

Facilitator Guide - Page 3

Finally, if you havent yet, I would encourage you to follow us on Facebook

(5LanguagesofApprecia<on and DrPaulWhite) and Twi_er (DrPaulWhite) because we send out
prac<cal sugges<ons, quotes and research results that can be helpful to you throughout the
training process (it is good to encourage your par<cipants to sign up, as well.) And please let us
know how the training goes for you. We have a Success Story sec<on on the
www.apprecia<onatwork.com website, where you can share your stories of how the training
impacted you, your colleagues and your workplace.

I trust you will not only nd this training process to be valuable but also fun to go through with
your co-workers.

Warmly,


Paul White, PhD
President, Family Business Resources, Inc.
Making Work Rela(onships Work

Page 4

2011. All rights reserved by Dr. Paul White & Dr. Gary Chapman.

Facilitator Guide Components

This guide has been developed to aid you in the delivery of the Appreciation at
Work workshop. Take time to review the information in this guide and familiarize
yourself with the content before your first training workshop.
This guide is divided into the following sections:
Pre-Session Information
This section contains information to help prepare you for your training sessions.
It includes:

Thoughts on how to determine your participants learning needs

Checklist of items to complete before the training

Pre-session e-mails for participants and their managers

Conducting Your Session

This section provides specific instructions to aid in the delivery of your
workshop. Each learning element is outlined in detail, giving you key
information such as the objective, time to complete, and even tips on what you
can do to be better prepared.
The materials are icon-driven for ease of use. Additionally, copies of
PowerPoint slides from the session are included to make your presentation
easier to facilitate. The Facilitator Guide includes enough white space to add
any personal thoughts or ideas to aid your workshop delivery.
Appendix
The appendix includes instructions on how to complete the Motivating by
Appreciation Inventory (MBA) and additional materials to aid in your delivery of
the workshop. Included in your Facilitator Kit is Facilitator Resource CD and
DVD. The Resource CD contains resource information including articles,
PowerPoint slides, Participant Guides, etc. The Resource DVD contains four
video files, one for each module. Both resources are referenced throughout this
guide.

Facilitator Guide - Page 5

Pre-Session Information
Materials Needed to Conduct the Workshop:

Facilitator Guide

Participant Guides - There is one participant guide for each training

module. These can be found on the Facilitator Resource CD. Modules
are designed to be printed on 11x17 paper (tabloid).

Option: Copies of the Participant Guide can also be ordered by

emailing [email protected] or calling 316-681-4431.

Motivating By Appreciation Inventory Code - each participant will need a

registration code to complete the inventory.

PowerPoint Presentation (On Facilitator Resource CD)

LCD Projector

Computer

Flip chart and markers

Definition of Icons
For easy reference, icons are shown in the margins of your training materials.
They will help you quickly recognize key items in a section or specific activity.
The following is a description and picture of each icon used.

Flip Chart or White Board to be used

Activity - could either be a leader-led

discussion, small-group discussion
or some other type of activity

Play a video segment. The videos

can be found on the Facilitator
Resource DVD.

Page 6

2011. All rights reserved by Dr. Paul White & Dr. Gary Chapman.

Action Tasks Prior to the Session

Three Weeks Prior to Session
Read the 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace book to
familiarize yourself with the workshop material.

Review this Facilitator Guide and the Participant Modules with particular
emphasis on understanding the content.

Confirm that you have one participant guide for each participant.

Verify session logistics such as location, room setup, number of

participants, equipment needed, materials needed, etc.

Two Weeks Prior to Session

E-mail participants and their managers confirming their attendance and
sharing logistical information including location of training, agenda for the
day, and the pre-session work you would like them to complete. You will
also want to share your enthusiasm for the opportunity to work with
them.
Note: There are two reference emails on the CD. One is for the
participants and one is for their manager. In some instances the
manager will be attending the workshop so you can simply send them
the participant email. Please modify the emails to fit your own need.
Both emails are optional.

Option: Arrange to get a copy of the 5 Languages of Appreciation in the

Workplace book to each participant. Each book contains a registration
code (in the back cover) for the Motivating by Appreciation Inventory.
Note: Additional codes can be purchased at www.MBAInventory.com
for those who do not need a book.

Rehearse the presentation using the Facilitator Guide, videos, and

participant materials. Be sure to consider specific examples of content
areas that you will be asked to demonstrate and reinforce.

One Week Prior to Session

Finalize any logistical issues such as room setup, delivery of participant
materials, equipment reservations, refreshments, etc.

Rehearse the presentation.

Review the MBA Inventory reports from the participants. Identify specific
areas of focus for your session. Print one copy of each participants
report for the participants to use in the session.

Facilitator Guide - Page 7

One Day Prior to Session

Do a final check to make sure you have all the materials and equipment
needed for your session.

Do a final review of materials to answer any lingering questions you

have or to focus on areas that you want to pay particular attention to in
the session.

Day of Session
Arrive at least 45 minutes prior to the session to ensure room setup is
complete, equipment is functional, and materials are distributed.

Page 8

2011. All rights reserved by Dr. Paul White & Dr. Gary Chapman.

Pre-Session E-mail Template Participants

Greetings!
Im looking forward to our time together in the upcoming training session,
Appreciation at Work. Im excited about this new workshop that focuses on how
we appreciate people in the work place. Our training will be broken up into four
modules that range between 60-90 minutes each.
In the next few days you will be receiving a copy of the book 5 Languages of
Appreciation in the Workplace by Dr. Gary Chapman and Dr. Paul White. I
encourage you to read through the book at your leisure.
Be sure to mark your calendar with the following
information:
Session: Module 1 - The Importance of
Appreciation
Date: (Insert Date)
Time: (Insert Time)

5 Languages of Appreciation
The Importance of Appreciation
The Five Languages
Putting the 5 Languages to Work
Making it Stick

Location: (Insert Location)

If you have any questions prior to our time together, do
not hesitate to contact me at (insert preferred contact information). I look
forward to seeing you!
Facilitator Name

Facilitator Guide - Page 9

Pre-Session E-mail Template Manager

Greetings!
Im looking forward to having your associate, (insert name) in our upcoming
training session, Appreciation at Work. I appreciate your commitment to help
(him/her) learn and grow by encouraging (him/her) to attend this session.
I will be doing everything I can to make this session informative, enjoyable, and
worthwhile. The agenda I have developed for this training will help focus the
skills and behaviors necessary for your team member to refine (his/her)
leadership skills with everyone around (him/her).
During the session, (employees name) will learn the following:

The concept of languages of appreciation and the value that it can

create for team members.

Ten ideas on how to communicate appreciation to others.

As a manager, your role is important. Some of the things you can do before the
session are:

Discuss your expectations for the session with your team member. Help
(him/her) understand the importance of the training.

Help the employee clear (his/her) calendar. This will allow (him/her) to
focus on the training session instead of what awaits (him/her) upon
return.

Most importantly, share your enthusiasm for your team members

continued learning and growth.

Please be sure to note the following information:

Session: Module 1 - The Importance of Appreciation
Date: (Insert Date)
Time: (Insert Time)
Location: (Insert Location)
If you have any questions prior to the session, do not hesitate to contact me at
(insert preferred contact information).
Facilitator

Page 10

2011. All rights reserved by Dr. Paul White & Dr. Gary Chapman.

Conducting Your Session

This workshop is divided into four modules. The four courses together are a
core leadership development offering. They can delivered together as a full-day
course, or you can deliver them as separate two-hour modules.

Course Description
The overarching goal of the Appreciation at Work training is to assist individuals
in the workplace (both employees and volunteers) in understanding how to
communicate appreciation and encouragement effectively to their colleagues
and to provide the resources and support to apply this knowledge proactively in
their current work environment.

Course Objectives
This course has four main objectives. By completing this course, participants
will be able to:

Understand the core concepts of appreciation and encouragement, their

importance in workplace relationships, and identify the negative results
that can occur when team members do not feel valued or appreciated.

Describe each of the five languages of appreciation and what they look
like in daily work life, and affirm the core components for
appreciation to be communicated effectively (individualized, personal,
and in the language meaningful to the recipient).

Identify and deal with the challenges of individuals blind spots, the
weirdness factor, and the need to use the specific dialects of each
language.

Apply the principles of the languages of appreciation in everyday work

relationships by utilizing the tools and resources provided.

Setting Expectations
You will often get what you expect from your participants. Many studies have
shown that facilitators expectations, perceptions, and opinions of the
participants do affect the results. Make sure to share your expectations with
your participants, including that they share responsibility in making the session
a success through contributing, following ground rules, and being open to
learning.

Suggested Timing Outline for each Module

The following suggestions for timing are just that - suggestions. The one thing
you cannot anticipate in your sessions is the amount of discussion you will have
over a given topic. You may have situations where youve hit a hot button for
Facilitator Guide - Page 11

the group and they want to discuss the topic. Thats fine and you should
encourage them to talk. However dont linger on the topic too long where you
run short of time on another topic.
Module 1: The Importance of Appreciation
Content

Timing

Introduction

:05

Activity: The Most Thoughtful Gift

:10

Overview of the Five Languages

:06

Module 1 Video

:08

Discussion Questions (page 3)

:10

Cues That Appreciation is Needed

:15

10 Easiest Ways to Express Appreciation

:10

Activity

:10

Action Plan & Closing Comments

:10

Total

1:24

Module 2: The Five Languages

Content

Timing

Introduction

:05

Activity: How Did It Go?

:10

Module 2 Video

:10

Discussion of the Five Languages

:30

Words of Affirmation
Quality Time
Acts of Service
Tangible Gifts
Physical Touch
Activity: My Primary Language

:10

Activity: Group Profile

:10

Action Plan & Closing Comments

:15

Total

Page 12

1:30

2011. All rights reserved by Dr. Paul White & Dr. Gary Chapman.

Module 3: Putting the 5 Languages to Work

Content

Timing

Introduction

:05

Activity: Opening Discussion

:10

Module 3 Video

:10

Dealing With Potential Blind Spots

:10

Getting Over the Weirdness Factor

:10

Understanding the Individual Dialects of Appreciation

:25

Whats the Difference?

:10

Action Plan & Closing Comments

:05

Total

1:25

Module 4: Making it Stick

Content

Timing

Introduction

:05

Module 4 Video

:10

Be Authentic

:10

Internal Barriers to Authentic Appreciation

:05

External Barriers to Authentic Appreciation

:05

Activity: Part of Our Culture

:15

Our Stories

:20

Activity: Sharing a Story

:10

Activity: Questions We Need to Be Asking

:15

What Would You Say?

:15

The Plan & Closing Comments

:05

Total

2:00

Facilitator Guide - Page 13

Videos
The videos for each module can be found on the Facilitator Resource DVD.

PowerPoint Slides
Included on the Facilitator Resource CD are four PowerPoint slide decks, each
one mapped to a specific module. The slides are optional and simply provide
structure to your training sessions. The slides follow the information in the
Facilitator Guide. There is a place-holder slide for where you can insert the
appropriate video element into the slide deck.

Page 14

2011. All rights reserved by Dr. Paul White & Dr. Gary Chapman.

Module 1: The Importance of Appreciation

This outline gives instructions for delivering the content for module one. For
each page in the participant guide, you will find a teaching outline with highlevel speaking points, plus instructions for completing the activities.
Key Objective
Participants will be able to:

Understand the core concepts of appreciation and encouragement, their

importance in workplace relationships, and identify the negative results
that can occur when team members do not feel valued or appreciated.

Activity: The Most Thoughtful Gift

Put each of the following questions on a flip chart. Have everyone write their
answers on the flip chart. These can be either in the context of work or
something personal. Let them decide the context for this first example.

Whats the most thoughtful gift anyone ever gave to you?

What is the most encouraging thing anyone ever said to you?

Debrief the responses by having the group go and stand around each chart and
review the answers.

What similarities do you see?

What differences?

What made these meaningful?

Page 1: Overview of the 5 Languages of Appreciation

Presentation
Provide some background information on the book and the importance
of appreciation from your own perspective. Give an example (within the
context of work) where someone gave you a thoughtful gift or they gave
you an encouraging comment. The opening activity gave the participants
the option of choosing either a personal or work setting. Your example
should be in the context of work.

Discuss the opening question on this page to see how individuals in

class typically communicate appreciation to others.

Facilitator Guide - Page 15

Review the fact that there are four modules for this workshop and that
you will be spending 60-90 minutes in each session.

The question at the bottom of page 1 is another open-ended question

geared to get the participants thinking about how they express
appreciation to others.

Video
Introduction: There is an introductory video by Dr. Gary Chapman to
introduce everyone to the content of Appreciation at Work.

Content: Dr. Paul White will provide ten minutes of introductory

information specific to this first module. Ask the participants to turn to
page 2 in their guide to take notes during the video.

Page 2: Video Discussion

Foundational Facts
One of the key messages that we hear from people around the country
is that people desperately want to feel appreciated and valued in their
jobs.

The fact is most people dont feel appreciated.

Do you agree or disagree with this information? Please explain your

answer.

Key Research Findings

In one study 79% of employees who quit their jobs cite lack of
appreciation as a key reason for their leaving.

Page 16

In another study, 65% of North Americans report that they received no

recognition or appreciation at their workplace in the past 12 months.

What do you think of this information? What is the impact when a

majority of people dont receive recognition or appreciation at work?

2011. All rights reserved by Dr. Paul White & Dr. Gary Chapman.