ALUMINA Syphlitic METAL

Hes more me than I am me

One of the heavier stateseven tho up there in the chart (LD)
Who am I? Real Intense Confusion
Both Malleability and Rigidity (for survival) I cant yield a bit
Retention Issue: A one way street cant let out,
Really strain to bring anything out: Convoluted answers
Need Exact Rules for Everything cross the left lace first
Look Obsessive; Perfectionist
Dont Hurry me Slow mentally Will get angry, hysterical, etc. if pushed
Things must follow the rules, No spontaneity, Fairly Moralistic
Anger: When anything disrupts his carefully prepared structure
Terrific Impulses Take those knives away! Helpless to keep them out
Tremendous anxiety, Every morning How to I do this thing life?
Tremendous Despair from how difficult life is: Suicide

Strain Nothing can get out; Dryness
Confusion Worse morning, vertigo, dry rice
Rigidity Paralysis, clumsy, heavy limbs; neurological
Odd Sensations Damaged nerves; egg on face, delayed feeling

1. Worse morning or upon waking
2. Dryness anywhere (mucus membranes, skin)
3. Worse fromeating (If it cant get out, dont put anything in)
4. Creates neurological, seizures, paralysis, clumsiness
5. From physical brain injury
6. Vertigo, worse morning, worse when close eyes
7. Sensation of cobweb or egg on face, light covering on the face
8. Aversion to potatoes, and aggr. from eating them
9. Strong craving for dry rice (SRP)
10. Craving for indigestible things, chalk, dirt, coffee grounds
11. Severe, severe constipation, w/o urging, even when stool is in rectum, people have to go in and dig it out
12. (Acute) extreme constipation in pregnancy with dry stool, also in newborns
13. Difficult to pass urine; straining; and stream is slow going
14. Can only pass urine during bowel movement
15. Desire, but difficult to have orgasm, feeling but no release
16. Heaviness of limbs, difficulty moving, can progress to paralysis
17. Nerves dont react quickly, can be pricked with pin and delay feeling that
18. Any kind of tremors, any neurological condition
19. Terrific itching w/o eruption, scratch so hard will bleed (Sulph) but doesnt produce eruption

Fears
Of Specific things they see
of knives, of blood, of cockroaches (Phos)
of insanity (they know something is wrong)




Alumina
Do I want to me, or do I want to be what YOU want me to be?
Molding, to mold
The idea of clay
Giving a shape to something
The way he wants to shape it, the clay itself doesnt have a shape, the shape is given by someone
else
Must be changed into someone else before he can see or speak
Sees and speaks thru individuality of someone else
Confusion, does not kn
ow who he is
Delusion: head belongs to another
Kid may become impulsive
So impulsive, may lead to acts of violence
Suicidal tendencies, to cut himself, to shoot himself, to hurt someone else
He looses control
Paralysis
Ones sense of identity is so important that if you do not know this.leads to kill oneself
Mag- to someone else
Nat someone elses identity
Alum no identity
Write your name, and erase it, who are you? When you loose your name

ALUMINA continued


Alumina Mental State
Syphilitic
Need to see both rigidity and malleability
Substance
Heat it and it will do anything you want it to do, extremely
versatile material, yet holds its form
Retention Issue
A one way street
They can take in, but cant let out
(wont be able to express symptoms)
Can only give you a convoluted answer
Extreme case; wont even respond to you
Dementia (find these guys in nursing
homes frequently)
Really strain to bring anything out
They just dont know how to answer the
question
Confusion Who am I?
Self is missing
Intense
Lack of orientation, where am I?
Disorientation, have no identify or loss
their identity
Delusion: My head belongs on someone else
Delusion: Belongs to another consciousness
Delusion; Thinks someone else sees for me
Delusion; Someone else has heard something that I
have heard, my ears are in her body
Real intense confusion
Worse than an out of body experience
Mental slowness
in speech and in answering
Mentally worse from hurry
creates anger and/or hysteria
Mental dullness
Worse with any mental exertion,
worse in morning when contemplating mental exertion
Differential w/Carcinocin
Carcboundary issue both ways, easily bombarded, and
also expressive.
A Carc architect, make wonderful designs for people, understands
their needs, may not able to make design for themselves
May be looking for clues as to who I am
I know I am sitting here, but..
(In Alumina, I dont even know that)
Ediology
The way you become yourself
is suppressed
Taking away childs ability to explore
Exposure to aluminum in cooking
Early Childhood/birth trauma
Parent trying to correct the way the baby
sits up, crawls, way it feeds itself
Its not okay to cry You only wave bye-bye with right
hand
Need a Template for Everything
Has to learn all these things very precisely
Make reasonable engineers, doing calculations
Learn precisely, always on specific tem-
perature, always certain amount
If I dont cross the left lace first, I dont know how to do it
Look Obsessive
Perfectionist
Has to take copious notes in school
Engineering is good for them, Accounting is also
Worse from hurry
Need certain specific things to remain oriented
Dont Hurry me
Will get angry, hysterical, etc. if pushed
Slow mentally
My mind dulls out sometimes
Slow in their responses (have to go and find the words)
It just takes me time it find it (the answer)
Worse if study too much, exertion of mind
It takes what it takes (time)

Anger when hurried
In practice: they dont have enough time to do things
I have to get up 2 hours early to get ready for the day
Case: woman would take 5 hours to get ready for anything
(didnt really know why) She was going at rate that was
comfortable for her, wasnt in synch with everyone else
Her Biggest worry: How to get to work
on time
Terrific Impulses
Desire to kill with a knife
Suicidal at sight of blood or knife
Horrible thoughts of killing oneself
(horrified by having them)
Mind triggered in weird direction
Case: couldnt have knives in the kitchen
Any instrument of killing; guns, knifes,
etc. brings on this feeling
No screen to keep them out and no way to
get them out once they are there
Helpless
Rigidity
If you make alumina into something it stays
A person will develop a certain rigidity
to survive
Fixed ideas, part of rigidity and retention, with-
out them they fall apart
Doesnt allow for any change
Has to behave in a certain way
Reading a lecture; from page without look-
ing up, no connection with audience
I cant yield a bit
Fear of loss of control
Dont easily let go of anything
Dry physically
Great difficulty achieving orgasm
Tremendous anxiety
Especially in the morning, have to start again
How do I do this?
Tremendous Despair Underlying
Can be easily depressed
From how difficult life is
They do feel like something is wrong
Extreme despair of every getting out of
this state, eventually suicidal
Anger
When anything disrupts his carefully
prepared structure
They broke the contract (ex-friends)
Relationships
Things have to go within the expectations,
follow the rules
No spontaneity
Fairly Moralistic
Fairly moralistic syphilitic, all sense of guilt or moral high
ground, but more extreme that real situation will warrant
Jobs
May likely move jobs frequently
If Job betrays one of their rules
They are out there searching for who they are
Could also stay in one
But they know that something is wrong
Children
Attention deficit (diagnosis often)
Fear of knives, blood, of insanity, of
cockroaches (Phos)


Case
Women
Chief complaint, a lot of stress about how to parent
teenage boys
She didnt know how to parent them
2 boys, wouldnt o what she told him to do
Husband was continually berating her, for not working
Feel one way when e/him, another way when alone
I feel like Ive been asleep all my life, hes more me
than I am me
I dont know who I am
Shes gone form job to job
Finally job, she thought could handle, 8 hours once a
week, correct test papers, could stay longer if needed
Such a relief, when get up in morning, because had a
purpose, she had somepleace to go and something to do
there
I have really issue with connection with people
At psycho. Sense that they care, but cant fell like
there is a connection with them
Being a student of psychology very difficult, no idea
what to ask clients or how to be with them
In interview, she had tough time (took 3 hours) staying
on topic
If I let myself think about it, I feel really weird discon-
nected
Overwhelmed with life, house was real mess
I dont feel connected with house or stuff
Im in shock when see stuff or mess
Unfocused
Unproductive
J ust put me out of my misery, cant stand any longer
Excluded not connected
Huge dread in morning
About day coming
Only thing that makes her feel good is job
Underlying sense no matter how much she struggle,
not get right
Cant know what she needs, cant know what psycho.
Clients need
Dream; recurring, person s committing gruesome mur-
der, cutting them over and over again, then cuts per-
sons head off, then sinks her teeth into neck, some-
times in dream, shes the murder, sometime shes sepa-
rate and sometimes they are one
Also constipation

LMs (because of her age and amount of entrenchment
of disease and this was a pace that worked will with
her)
A year into treatment
Got divorced
I dont know who I am, but know where I am going
Furnished house one piece at a time, so not overwhelm-
ing
Still trouble with kids
2 years
I feel I can do things in same time as it takes other peo-
ple
Got parenting help
I realized part of my program was missing
I feel like Im getting it back
I know now, that something is going on
3 year
LM 20
New relationship
First time, had orgasm

Alumina (Sankaran)
Need for motherly care
Homesickness
Afraid of hospital
Move into new apt stress, where neighbors are
strangers
Not yet developed ability to decide
Doesnt want ot take advice, but isnt able to de-
cide
Always focused inward about disease, wouldnt
come out of her house
Desire for familiarity Row 3
Aggr from unfamiliar surroundings Row 3

ALUMINA Syphlitic METAL
Hes more me than I am me


(Sankaran)
A wall she cannot cross, a boundary
Respect the wall
On one hand respect the wallSil
On other hand give it a shotAlum
You know inside what is right and what is wrong
Mom likes reading, staying at home, independ-
ent, knows what she wants (Sil)
Dad like to go out to parties, is undecided
(Alum)
Confused element Im shakey, Im loose (Alum)
Silica
Other part is staying within walls clear idea of it
a rigid ideas of it stay inside the walls
Boundaries walls have to be respected, clear
and rigid
Fixed part wall part

A conflict between someone malleable and some-
thing rigid

Case: Alumina-Silica (Sankaran T31)
Suddenly one bad word stuck in my mind, not able
to get it out for a week
This scene stuck in my mind for a week
Then I was normal
Could not get out of it
If word get out, then scene get stuck, then idea I
have male organ get stuck
Im anxious regarding future and sex
Doubting my sexual orientation
Impatient in most matters
I brood if Im hurt
Feel good if consoled, sympathy, I love company
Whether Im bisexual
I didnt know what was happening
I was confused
Comes suddenly out of the blue it starts
Unable to control it
I feel guilty
Parents high expectations of me, expect me to
earn much
My brain doesnt listen to me
Out of the blue
Brain tortured unable to control whats happening
My image is of person confident and strong
I dont want them disappointed
Dreams: naked in public, embarrassed, how will
they look at me
Scared, judging me for what I am not
Better holding something tights
Control over something
Why not strong enough, why submissive
I give up, mad if not my way when I know its right
way
Dream: suddenly hair catches fire, scared ruin
way I look
Its bad dirty, weird, image guys organ
Not supposed to think such things, out of my con-
trol

Themes: confused
Am I in control or is something else in control
Why not strong enough to say what I want to say
Fulfill expectations
I have to be in this way, I should not SHOW I am
not in this way or they disappointed
Rem: Alum-Sil


ALUMINA-SIL