EXCELLENCE IN ATTITUDE

By Robb Thompson

Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture quotations are taken from the New King James Version, copyright 1982 by homas !elson, "nc# $ll rights reser%ed# Scripture quotations marked KJV are taken from the King James Version of the &ible#

Excellence in Attitude "S&! 1'889(2)'2*'8 +opyright 2,,2 by -obb hompson .amily /ar%est +hurch 18*,, 92nd $%e# inley 0ark, "llinois 1,2(( 3ditorial +onsultant4 +ynthia /ansen e5t 6esign4 7isa Simpson +o%er 6esign4 8reg 7ane 0rinted in the United States of $merica# $ll rights reser%ed under "nternational +opyright 7aw# +ontents and9or co%er may not be reproduced in whole or in part in any form without the e5press written consent of the 0ublisher#

DEDICATION
his book is dedicated to all those who by hot pursuit ha%e chosen an e5cellent attitude:in spite of those who by their poor attitude may ne%er affect anyone in a positi%e way#

TABLE OF CONTENTS
"ntroduction############################################################9 1# 3mbracing 7ife ;ith an 35cellent $ttitude####12 2# -elating to <thers ;ith $n 35cellent $ttitude ##############################################################################29 )# 3sther %s# =ashti4 $pproaching $uthority ;ith an 35cellent $ttitude############################################22 >uotations on $ttitude#######################################1,1 +onfession of .aith for an 35cellent $ttitude# # #1,)

INTRODUCTION
his world we li%e in has so marred and camouflaged what is right before 8od that the great ma?ority of people don@t e%en know how to li%e their li%es# hey ha%e no idea how to become what 8od wants them to become# here is only one way to change this sad situation, and it@s found in the ;ord of 8od# <nly 8od@s ;ord gi%es us a true picture of the way life is really supposed to be# "f we are e%er going to find out what is right before the 7ord in e%ery area of life, we must take a look at the Scriptures and find out the differences between what 8od says and what society says# hese are the differences that gi%e us our significance in life# he challenge many people face is that they place their highest priority on being liked and accepted by others# o that end, they make sure they look like e%eryone else# hey dress like e%eryone else# hey dri%e the same cars as e%eryone else# hey do their ?obs like e%eryone else#
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But we will be ne&er remembered, pursued, or rewarded, by that which ma'es us the same as those around us( )e will only be remembered because o* our di**erences( ;hat is it that makes you different, friendA ;hate%er it is, that is the quality which will get you noticed by those who can promote you in life# And nothing will get you noticed more +uic'ly than an excellent attitude( ;hy is thatA &ecause there are so few people left in this world who ha%e an e5cellent attitudeB 3%eryone wants e5cellence, but few are willing to do what is necessary to achie&e it# ;hat about youA $re you willing to pay the price for e5cellence in your lifeA "f so, you must take in%entory of the way you@%e been thinking# Cou see, the word DattitudeD refers to a posture that is assumed by your body in connection with a *eeling or a mood( $ttitude also refers to a way o* thin'ing that is demonstrated in your disposition, demeanor, and opinion( ;hen you ha%e an attitude about a certain sub?ect, that attitude is displayed in the way you approach people and talk to them about the sub?ect# Cour demeanor and your words will always reflect your attitude# ;hen you rule your attitudes, you rule your own heart# hat is e5tremely significant, because the &ible says a person who can rule his own spirit is greater than he who can take a city E0ro%# 114)2F# hink of it :if you learn how to rule your attitudes, you become
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greater in 8od@s eyes than a four'star general with an army at his command who is able to take an entire city by forceB hat@s why maintaining an e5cellent attitude is so %ery important# "n fact, in the arena of e5cellence, attitude is almost e%erything# he moment you ignore your poor attitudes is the moment you take a wrong turn that leads to mediocrity and defeat# So once you make the decision to pursue e5cellence at all costs, don@t e%er try to bypass this %ery basic step# 6eal with a poor attitude e%ery time it rears its ugly head# &ecome known for your e5cellent attitude, and then watch as 8od opens doors of opportunity to propel you into a life where winning is an e%eryday e%entB Robb Thompson

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CHAPTER ONE

1.

EMBRACING LIFE WITH AN EXCELLENT ATTITUDE

6o you want to push beyond mediocrity and attain e5cellence in e%ery area of your lifeA "f you do, you must take in%entory of the way you think# #* you rule your mind, you will rule your li*e( .or instance, let@s start with the most basic questions# /ow do you approach lifeA ;hat is the attitude you carry into the situations and challenges you encounter on a daily basisA /ow you respond to these fundamental questions is critical, for your life will only reflect e5cellence if you continually maintain an attitude of e5cellence# herefore, " want to share se%eral principles with you that you must understand in order to take control of your poor attitudes and mo%e toward your goal of e%er'increasing e5cellence in e%ery area of life# Gany people think Dgood enoughD is acceptable# &ut it isn,t acceptable if you want to become a person of e5cellence# $ person of e5cellence refuses to limit his e5pectations of life and of himself to D?ust good
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enough#D /e is always moti%ating himself to become better, to rise higher, to achie%e more# $ctually, one of the greatest enemies of e5cellence is the D?ust'good'enoughD attitude# hat attitude leads us straight toward mediocrity, which is the opposite of e5cellence# o be mediocre is to be frail, inadequate, inferior, substandard, second class, unsatisfactory, commonplace, and ordinary# his is the place where most people want to li%e their entire li%es because it@s the place of least resistance and requires the least effort# &ut DordinaryD is also the greatest hindrance keeping people from becoming what 8od wants them to become#

A Person With an Excellent Attitude refuses to live a life of just good enough.
Cou ?ust ha%e to accept the fact that your pursuit of e5cellence will always make you a little bit different than most other people# &ut let me help you here# Cou don@t ha%e to be awesomeI you ?ust ha%e to stay a step
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aheadB hat@s what e5cellence is:staying at least one step ahead of ordinary# "t doesn@t take a lotI it ?ust takes one step# "t@s like a foot race# "n order to beat the competition, all you ha%e to do is be a fraction of a second faster# &ut after you ha%e won the race, your challenge is to make sure you don@t lose your edge in all the races that are yet to come# hat@s what makes you e5cellent:learning to stay in that place of %ictory#

A Person of Excellence understands that todays excellence is tomorrows mediocrity.

Cou see, e5cellence is its own standard of competition# his means that continual change is a requirement, not an option, in the pursuit of e5cellence# +ompromise and the status quo are only acceptable to the mediocre:to those who ha%e let their D?ust'good'enoughD attitude keep them in a place called ordinary# .riend, don@t e%er let yourself stay for a moment in
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that place where mediocrity reigns# Gake sure your le%el of e5cellence tomorrow is always greater than your le%el of e5cellence today# D8ood enoughD should ne%er be good enough for youB

A Person With an Excellent Attitude never takes time off from pursuing excellence.
$ person who maintains an e5cellent attitude is an indi%idual who continually presses, presses, presses, presses, and presses for more# /e presses his way through obstacles# /e is always reaching for a higher le%el of e5cellence in e%ery area of life# ;e should ne%er let oursel%es stop pursuing e5cellence, e%en after we@%e reached the goal we@%e been stri%ing for# hat@s the time to start all o%er again, reaching for a higher le%el, a greater goal, a deeper purpose than before# $ poor attitude says, D/ey, "@%e been working hard at pursuing e5cellence# " deser%e a little @down time@ to do whate%er " want#D &ut that isn@t what 8od says in /is ;ord# he truth is, there is no Ddown timeD to
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en?oy a dose of mediocrity if we want to be people of e5cellenceB

A Person of Excellence truly believes that his attitude will determine his altitude in life.
he le%el of e5cellence " pursue in my life will determine the altitude 8od will get out of my life# his is the attitude " carry into e%ery situation of life# "@m con%inced that if " press toward e5cellence:if " continually reach for a higher le%el of e5cellence in e%ery area:8od will ha%e /is way in my life# "@m con%inced /e will ne%er quit on meI therefore# " will go as far as " can go in fulfilling what 8od has called me to do# !ow, in order to maintain this attitude toward life, we ha&e to understand the di**erence between success and popularity( Success has to do with the +uality of life a person li%es, whereas popularity has to do with the +uantity of life a person li%es# 0ersonally, "@m not interested in popularity# $ person who is popular will one day ha%e to deal with
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the fact that he isn@t popular anymore# "n fact, the day a person becomes popular is ?ust one day closer to the day people begin to re?ect him# hat@s why popularity isn@t the right goal to pursue# " recently had the opportunity to see a particular gentleman " went to high school with# his man was a %ery popular athlete in high school, and he was good at what he did# &ut you should see him nowB 7ife has not been kind to himB /e@s se%enty pounds o%erweight and works at a menial ?ob# !ow, " ha%e no problems with a person working at a little Gr# .i5it ?ob, as long as his goal is to own his own business one day with thirty trucks and forty DGr# .i5itsD working for himB /e might start out with one truck, but that doesn@t mean he@s going to stop there# 8od is bringing him through that stage of his businessI /e isn@t bringing him to that stage so he can say, D hat@s it# "@m not going any further#D !o matter where a person starts out in any area of life, that isn@t where 8od wants that person to end# $nyway, there stood this man:se%enty pounds o%erweight and trudging along in life with a menial ?ob# !e%ertheless, he still treated me condescendingly, ?ust as he had when " was in high schoolB " looked at this man and realiJed an important
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truth4 Some people in this world were brought to a particular place in life ?ust by %irtue of where and how they grew up, who their parents were, what their parents taught them, and a couple of breaks here and there# &ut the truly successful indi%iduals in life are those who may ha%e not started out with any ad%antagesI yet these same indi%iduals ha%e made a %ery honest and accurate e%aluation of themsel%es and then pressed through to become people of e5cellence# ;e ha%e to choose which type of people we@re going to be# $re we going to start off in life at the le%el to which our momma and daddy brought us, only to descend into a life of one disappointment after another where we spend our time blaming the rest of the world for what has happened to usA <r are we going to be people for whom today is always the lowest point of the rest of our li%esA "f you choose to be the latter type of person, then today is always the day you say, D"@m going to go further# "@m not going to quit# "@m going to press on# "@m going to press through# " am going to reach for 8od@s highest# "@m going to be e%erything /e has called me to beBD

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A Person With an Excellent Attitude does not re uire others to prop him up.
$ person of e5cellence is prosperous in his own soul# herefore, he ne%er has to be propped up by another because he is already a whole person# ;ith that in mind, let me stress this point4 ;e should ne%er enter an intimate relationship or marry someone who isn@t already whole# "f we do, we will consistently ha%e to prop up that person and try to make him feel better# he truth is, we can only prop up people for so long before we ha%e to let them settle where%er they are going to settle in life# $fter a while, we ha%e to let them deal with their own problems and issues themsel%es# Geanwhile, we need to make sure we are prospering in our own souls# hat way we@ll be able to relate through other people rather than to them# hat@s what " do# " endea%or to look through e%ery situation " face# " ask myself, )hy is this person saying what he is saying- )hy is he acting the way he is acting- )hy did this person do what he did- )hat
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is really going on herehen " make the decision that no matter what another person says or does, " will ne%er let his words or actions change my own standard of e5cellence# " will ne%er let myself be disqualified because of my relationship with someone else# ;e don@t need other people to prop us up in life# 8od promises to deli%er us from difficult situations as we trust /im and maintain an e5cellent attitude# he &ible says in Second 0eter 249 that the 7ord knows how to deli%er the godly, and that includes e%ery one of usB

A Person With an Excellent Attitude never has to be encouraged by others.

$ person with an e5cellent attitude ne%er has to be encouragedI instead, he is always searching for someone he can encourage# Geanwhile, he has learned to encourage himself as 6a%id did when faced with a great personal crisis# .irst Samuel ), relates the time when enemies
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captured 6a%id@s own wife and children, as well as the families of his men# "n the terrible emotion of that moment, his men were e%en talking about stoning himB Cet e%en in this crisis, 6a%id@s heart turned toward 8od4 Now David was g !a"#$ dis" !ss!d% &o "'! (!o(#! s(o)! o& s"o*i*g 'i+% ,!-a.s! "'! so.# o& a## "'! (!o(#! was g i!v!d% !v! $ +a* &o 'is so*s a*d 'is da.g'"! s. ,." David s" !*g"'!*!d 'i+s!#& i* "'! Lo d 'is God. 1 Sa+.!# /012 6a%id was a man with an e5cellent attitude# /e didn@t go around looking for someone to encourage him in the midst of a crisis# he &ible says he encouraged himself in the 7ord# 6o you know why it@s important to respond to discouraging situations the way 6a%id didA &ecause when you encourage yourself in the 7ord, you know you@re getting it done right# ;hen other people encourage you, they may make some foolish statements in a misguided effort to make you feel better# Geanwhile, you may be thinking, # 'now this person is trying to encourage me, but he really stin's at it. <f course, you wouldn@t want to tell that person, DCou@re failing miserably at encouraging me,D so you ?ust ha%e to stay there and listen to himB
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hen there are the people in life who would ne%er think of telling you the truthI they ?ust want to make you feel better# hat doesn@t help you either# 0ro%erbs 2(41 says, 3Fai"'&.# a ! "'! wo.*ds o& a & i!*d% ,." "'! )iss!s o& a* !*!+$ a ! d!-!i"&.#.3 <f course, you should be thankful for any encouragement you recei%e# !e%ertheless, you need to make a practice of encouraging yourself in the 7ord whene%er you face obstacles and challenges# Cou@ll always be the one who knows how to do it right#

A Person With an Excellent Attitude makes sure his self!worth is defined by "od and not by people.
Gy self'worth doesn@t ha%e anything to do with what someone thinks about me, because e%en if that person lo%es me today, tomorrow he may not like me at all# 0eople@s opinions and affections often change, but 8od always remains the same# hat@s why " don@t allow my self'worth to be defined by any personI it has to be defined by 8od and /is ;ord#
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A Person With an Excellent Attitude is personally accountable and a self!adjuster or correcter.

$ person of e5cellence is personally accountable for any wrong thoughts, feelings, or actions he might e5perience# herefore, he ad?usts within himself when he recogniJes something in his life that needs to change# ;hen you maintain an e5cellent attitude, you know when you ha%e allowed yourself to dwell on a particular thought pattern that you ne%er should ha%e allowed# Cou know when you say things you ne%er should ha%e said# $nd when you recogniJe you ha%e done something wrong, you deal with it# Cou are personally accountable, a self'ad?uster# Cou fi5 the problem# Cou don@t allow yourself to become a negati%e, complaining, or mediocre person# " personally cannot bear mediocrity because 8od cannot bear it# " lo%e the mediocre, but " hate mediocrity# "f a person is around me for any length of time, he will either stop being mediocre, or he will stop coming around me, concluding that "@m too
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?udgmental or or that " e5pect too much of him# <r worst of all, he may think that he is being controlled or manipulated by someone else@s standards# &ut the truth is, " don@t ha%e to say a word to someone who is always wanting to be better# $ person who is continually mo%ing toward a greater le%el of e5cellence continually corrects himself# ;e must ne%er force anyone to the point of ha%ing to confront us because of our lack of performance# "nstead, we must be our own self'ad?usters# ;e are the ones who should notify oursel%es whene%er we@re doing something wrong# ;e know when there is something in our li%es that needs to change# ;hen the problem comes to our attention, we need to deal with it immediately rather than ?ust accept it as Dthe way we are#D Cou see, the moment we begin to compromise 8od@s standards in our li%es is the moment we begin to face increasing challenges# hat is also the moment we begin to force other people to become tremendously longsuffering with us# D;ell, they@re supposed to forgi%e meI they@re +hristiansBD we might be tempted to say# hat may be true, but it is ne%er left up to us to decide when a person is supposed to forgi%e us#
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his is why4 /orgi&eness is in the power o* the *orgi&er, not in the complaint o* the person who needs to be *orgi&en( "@%e often had people come to me and say, D0astor, if "@m doing anything wrong, " want you to tell me right now#D "mmediately " wonder, To what le&el does this person want me to ta'e that re+uest- $fter all, it@s always possible to find some areas in a person@s life that need to be corrected because no one has reached perfection yet# "n%ariably, e%en the most well'intentioned +hristians get hurt when you tell them that they@re doing something wrong in their li%es# 0eople ?ust don@t like being told that something about them needs to change# 0ersonally, " embrace those times that "@m told "@m wrong# " didn@t say " liked those times, but " don@t cry when " go through them either Ealthough " may cry when " get alone in my carBF# " also don@t try to turn the tables on that person by saying, DCes, but what about youA 7ook at what you@re doingB Cou ought to look at yourself in the mirrorBD he fact that " may be doing something wrong has nothing to do with what someone else might be doing
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wrong in his life# $nd ?ust because someone Dpushes my buttonD by pointing out what he sees as my problem, that doesn@t gi%e me the right to say, D<kay, now it@s my turn# hese are the things you,re doing wrongBD "f " did that, the con%ersation would end with absolutely nothing getting accomplished# !o, " want to embrace correction, because " want to become a little better e%ery day# hat@s why we should be the ones correcting oursel%es rather than waiting for someone else to do it# ;e know better than anyone else when we@re doing something wrong, and no one e5cept us can decide to change# $nd change we must# "t@s the only way to escape a life where ordinary is good enough and commonplace describes each day that we li%e# "f we want to li%e an abundant life of more than enough, we ha%e to change our old ways of thinking and start approaching e%ery situation of life as people with e5cellent attitudesB

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PRINCIPLES FOR EMBRACING LIFE WITH AN ATTITUDE OF EXCELLENCE

A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! !&.s!s "o #iv! a #i&! o& 35.s" good !*o.g'.3 A P! so* o& E4-!##!*-! .*d! s"a*ds "'a" "oda$6s !4-!##!*-! is "o+o ow6s +!dio- i"$. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! *!v! "a)!s "i+! o&& & o+ (. s.i*g !4-!##!*-!. A P! so* o& E4-!##!*-! " .#$ ,!#i!v!s "'a" 'is a""i".d! wi## d!"! +i*! 'is a#"i".d! i* #i&!. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! do!s *o" !7.i ! o"'! s "o ( o( 'i+ .(. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! *!v! 'as "o ,! !*-o. ag!d ,$ o"'! s. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! +a)!s s. ! 'is s!#&8wo "' is d!&i*!d ,$ God a*d *o" ,$ (!o(#!. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! is (! so*a##$ a--o.*"a,#! a*d a s!#&8ad5.s"! o -o !-"o .

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CHAPTER TWO

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RELATING TO OTHERS WITH AN EXCELLENT ATTITUDE

!owhere are your attitudes tested more than in your relationships with other people# $fter all, it@s a lot easier to stay agreeable when the only opinion you ha%e to agree with is your ownB hat@s why " want to show you some scriptural principles regarding this all'important sub?ect of relating to others# ;hen these principles are followed, they will distinguish you as a person with an e5cellent attitude in your daily interactions with those around you#

A Person With an Excellent Attitude draws others to himself for refreshing and for a renewal of faith in humanity.
Cour attitude, whether good or bad, will affect
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e%ery indi%idual you come in contact with# hat@s so important to understand, because you always li%e in the memory of a person@s last encounter with you# !ow think for a moment about a person in your life with whom your last encounter was painful# ;hat is likely to happen the ne5t time you see that personA Cou may unconsciously put up walls to block communication before he e%en has an opportunity to open his mouthB ;hyA &ecause you remember how you felt the last time he left your presence, and you don@t want to repeat the e5perienceB <n the other hand, you will be quick to in%ite a person with an e5cellent attitude to go deeper in relationship with you# $fter talking to that person, you@ll spend a few e5tra minutes at your desk thinking, 0ou 'now, that was really nice( # 1ust lo&e tal'ing to him( E&ery time # do, #,m encouraged( Just the way he approaches li*e in general encourages me( 2e,s li'e a breath o* *resh air. $ person with an e5cellent attitude comes into your life looking for what he can do for you, not trying to find out what you can do for him( hat@s a %ery different quality than the ma?ority of people in this world possess# "n fact, the first thought that often crosses my mind
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when someone calls me is, 2ow much is this going to cost me- hat doesn@t always mean it will cost me financially# Sometimes it costs me emotionally# Gany times when " pick the telephone, it@s almost as if a ringer goes off in the back of my mind, signaling to me that it@s time to wrestle# Cou see, it@s a commitment to talk to some people, not a pri%ilege or a pleasure:and that commitment can cost dearly at times# &ut there are also people in my life who always ha%e an e5cellent attitude# " can hardly wait to talk to these people# hey sol%e problems for me# hey talk to me about my %alue:the things that are right about me# hey make me feel better about being meB hey don@t flatter me in order to get something from me# hey compliment in order to gi&e something to me# Cou don@t e%er mind in%iting that kind of person to come closer to you# Cou can rest assured that this isn@t one of those relationships where the closer you get, the more problems you ha%e to tolerate# Cou won@t ha%e to alter your personality in order to stay in relationship with this indi%idual# Unlike some people, he@s not ?ust a trial waiting to happen# !o, as you get closer to a person of e5cellence, you see more sweetness, not more problems# Cou can be
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yourself with him# he more you get to know him, the more you like him# /e is an in%iting person, someone you want to be around# ;hen you ha%e an e5cellent attitude, you in%ite people to come to you# hey ?ust naturally want to be around youB hey want to take a closer look at you because they can@t figure you out# D;hat is it about you that@s so differentAD they ask# D/ow can you ha%e such a good attitude all the time when life has gi%en you so many hard knocksAD hus, your e5cellent attitude has a lasting, positi%e effect on the people in your life# heir faith in humanity is renewed as they watch you o%ercome e%ery challenge and remain e5cellent no matter what obstacles stand in your way# Cou make them feel a little better e%ery time they lea%e your presence# $s a result, they in%ite you to come deeper into relationship and fellowship with them#

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A Person With an Excellent Attitude understands that gratitude creates the desire in others to give.
;hen you@re thankful, people ?ust can@t stop pouring into you# ;hy is thatA hey ?ust want to see a demonstration of a grateful heart againB Speaking from the standpoint of a husband, "@d ha%e to say there is nothing better in life than a thankful woman# he only thing that transcends that is the -aptureB Kust ask any husband# /e@ll know what "@m talking about# "f his wife asked him what would make him happy, he@d probably respond, DKust for you to be happy#D ;hy is thatA &ecause a wife can crush a husband with one look or make him a giant with one word# Gost wi%es ha%e no idea how happy it makes their husbands to hear them cheerfully humming or singing around the home# $ wife can bless her husband immeasurably ?ust by saying to him spontaneously
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from her heart, DCou know, /oney, you@re the greatestBD hat@s so much better than listening to a wife who complains all the timeB ;hen a husband knows his wife is at peace and grateful for all he does for her, he starts looking for more ways to bless her# $ husband thinks nothing can be better in life than walking in the door e%ery night to a wife who hugs him and tells him how important he is to herI how encouraged she is to be married to himI and how thankful she is that he has decided to lay down his life for her# "t is %ery easy for a man to cherish and take care of a wife like that, because gratitude always creates a desire in a spouse@s heart to gi%e e%en more# hat@s the same kind of response a grateful attitude generates in e%ery area of life# $ grateful person causes others to want to gi%e to him# <nce they see his happy, thankful heart, they ?ust can@t help it# hey say, D7et me try this again# " want to gi%e more to youBD D&ut why do you keep gi%ing to meAD D&ecause " like to see the thankfulness that comes out of your heart when " doBD D&ut " don@t deser%e this#D D hat@s one reason " like to gi%e to you# &ecause you know you don@t deser%e it, so you@re grateful# Cou don@t know how rare it is to find a grateful personBD
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hat@s e5actly what a person with an e5cellent attitude is in this modern world:a rare and wonderful findB

A Person With an Excellent Attitude bounces back uickly from hurtful words.
$ person who has an e5cellent attitude doesn@t really care what other people say to him# /e bounces back easily from hurtful words because he is secure in 3od,s lo%e for him# <ne time a man came up to me and said, D" hate you# 6o you understand thatA " hate you#D " reply, D!o, you don@t hate me# Cou ?ust think you do#D DCes, " do hate youBD D!o, you don@t#D D/ow can you say " don@t hate youAD D&ecause you are a +hristian, and -omans *4* says the lo%e of 8od has been shed abroad in your heart by the /oly 8host who been gi%en to you# So you may
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think you hate me, but the lo%e of 8od is inside you# Cou ?ust need to let /is lo%e come outBD " continued, D&esides, you don@t e%en know me, so how can you hate meA Cou probably think you hate me because of something you heard about me that isn@t e%en true# he person who told you probably didn@t e%en know what he was talking aboutBD $ll that man did when he became offended toward me was disqualify himself in 8od@s eyes# /e let that offense rob him of recei%ing what 8od wanted to gi%e him# &ut the man didn@t hurt me at all with his words because " know "@m accepted and belo%ed of the .ather# " li%e in the knowledge that "@m the righteousness of 8od in +hrist# his is what a person with an e5cellent attitude understands# his is how he li%es in his relationships with others# hat@s why he is able to bounce back quickly from words that would destroy others and walk free of hurt and offense, no matter what someone else says or does#

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A Person With an Excellent Attitude will not be manipulated or persuaded by another persons hard day.
;hen someone you are interacting with is ha%ing a hard day, you should do all you can to encourage and lift up that person# $s far as is possible with you, don@t let him stay negati%e or discouraged# hat way you@ll be so focused on continually pumping him full of good that he@ll ne%er be able to take you downB Cou see, a person with an e5cellent attitude ?ust keeps speaking right words e%en when the people around him are speaking wrong words# /e doesn@t let others@ moods or opinions affect him# /e ?ust keeps responding to e%erything that comes his way from 8od@s point of %iew# hat@s why a person of e5cellence is always on top of the situation instead of the situation being on top of him(

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A Person With an Excellent Attitude stays transparent and never hides behind a mask.
"t@s interesting to me that so many +hristians are hypocritical# hese +hristians li%e their li%es speaking from behind an in%isible mask# &ehind that mask is the truth about themsel%es that they don@t want to re%eal to others# &ut a person with an e5cellent attitude is someone who is transparent# ;hat you see is what you get with a person like that because there is no mask to hide who he really is# herefore, he doesn@t ha%e to go under construction:fasting and praying to make things right between him and 8od:before he can hold a con%ersation with you# /e ?ust stays simple, direct, and honest in all his relationships, especially in his relationship with 8od#

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A Person With an Excellent Attitude always asks# $What do others get out of a relationship with me%
he sad truth is, most people go through life with self'centered attitudes# 3%en in the +hurch, people ha%e been taught to be self'centered# Gost +hristians don@t spend much time thinking about what@s going on in other people@s li%es# "n e%ery situation they face, they think instead about how it will affect them# )hat,s going to happen to me i* # do thisthey wonder# )hat will # get out o* it- )hat about me, me, me0ersonally, " don@t let myself think the thought, )hat about me- hat thought ne%er e%en crosses my mind anymore# "nstead, " think about what the cost will be to the other people in%ol%ed# Cou see, " know 8od will take care of me, so my attitude is ne%er D;hat do " get out of thisAD "@m not looking for a Dwin' winD situation in any of my relationships because "@m always stri%ing for a Dyou winD situation#
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0eople often say, D$ll my relationships ha%e to be @win'win@ situations#D &ut there really isn@t any such thing# here is no middle ground to find in a godly relationships# ;e ha%e to constantly look for what we can gi%e into our relationships rather than what we can get out of themI otherwise, those relationships will stagnate and e%entually die# Cou see, too many people try to hide behind a bunch of DmaybesD in their relationshipsI meanwhile, they try to maneu%er themsel%es to a place where they can put off to the future the decisions they need to make today# &ut that kind of compromise has no place in the Lingdom of 8od# hat@s why the &ible says, D7et your yea be yea and your nay be nayD EKames *412F# -emember, friend, your attitude, whether e5cellent or poor, will cause you to li%e in the memory of your last encounter with each person you meet# So let me ask you this4 )hat is the mental snapshot the people in your li*e ha&e o* their last encounter with you- ;hat do they remember about being with youA ;hat kind of impression did you last lea%e in their mindsA +an they hardly wait to speak to you againA 6oes a smile come to their faces e%ery time they think about youA 6o they say, D hat is a really nice personB " really like being
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around him Mor herN#D "f you@re a person with an e5cellent attitude, that is e5actly what people think about their last encounter with you# 0eople can hardly wait to spend time with you again because you are so en?oyable to be aroundB hey know that e%en though others may complain about their problems or look for what they can get out of a situation, you won@t# Cou@re too busy looking for what you can gi%e into other people@s li%es# Cou@re far too busy restoring people@s faith in humanity with your e5cellent attitudeB

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PRINCIPLES FOR RELATING TO OTHERS WITH AN ATTITUDE OF EXCELLENCE

A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! d aws o"'! s "o 'i+s!#& &o !& !s'i*g a*d &o a !*!wa# o& &ai"' i* '.+a*i"$. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! .*d! s"a*ds "'a" g a"i".d! - !a"!s "'! d!si ! i* o"'! s "o giv!. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! ,o.*-!s ,a-) 7.i-)#$ & o+ '. "&.# wo ds. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! wi## *o" ,! +a*i(.#a"!d o (! s.ad!d ,$ a*o"'! (! so*6s 'a d da$. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! s"a$s " a*s(a !*" a*d *!v! 'id!s ,!'i*d a +as). A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! a#wa$s as)s% 3W'a" do o"'! s g!" o." o& a !#a"io*s'i( wi"' +!;3

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2)

CHAPTER THREE

ESTHER <S. <ASHTI1 APPROACHING AUTHORIT= WITH AN EXCELLENT ATTITUDE

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7ong ago in the ancient land of 0ersia, the li%es of two %ery different women intersected in a most unlikely way# <ne woman had great wealth, fa%or, influence, opportunity, and status at her disposalI yet in the end she lost it all# he second woman was born to a people in e5ile with none of the ad%antages that the first woman possessed# Cet in the end, the second woman gained all that the first woman had lost# ;hat was the source of these two %ery different outcomesA Two &ery di**erent attitudes( he names of these two women were =ashti and 3sther, and their story is found in the book of 3sther# " want to help you understand the differences between these two women so you can follow 3sther@s e5ample of an e5cellent attitude:an e5ample that leads to benefit and blessing rather than to loss and defeat# &ut before " share some of these differences, let me gi%e you a little background information#
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6uring the height of the Gedo'0ersian empire, a king named Her5es, or $hasuerus, reigned# &y the third year of his reign, Ling $hasuerus was already %ery successful# /e possessed great riches and %ast holdings of land# /e had an army of ser%ants to cater to his e%ery need and desire# 3%erything was going wonderfully for this king, so he decided to set aside si5 full months to show off e%erything he had accumulated to all the princes of the empire@s pro%inces# /e showed off his ser%ants, his riches, his possessions, and his capital city of Susa# $t the end of the si5 months, he held a great banquet not only for the princes and elders, but for all the people in the city# Geanwhile, >ueen =ashti held her own banquet for the women of the palace# <n the se%enth day of the banquet, the king said to his chamberlains, D"@d like you to call in =ashti# he people and the princes need to see how beautiful she is#D !ow, " don@t know where people ha%e gotten the idea that the king wanted his queen to dance a per%erted dance before his guests# he &ible doesn@t say that# $ll it says is that she was fair to look upon and that the king asked her to show up at the banquet# /e was proud of his beautiful wife, and he wanted to
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impress his guests with her beauty# "t@s also important to understand that this was a fi5ed marriage rather than a lo%e affair that resulted in marriage# "t was >ueen =ashti@s ?ob to show up when the king so ordered# /owe%er, 3sther 1412 tells us that the queen responded with a poor attitude when the king summoned her to his great banquet4 B." >.!!* <as'"i !&.s!d "o -o+! a" "'! )i*g6s -o++a*d , o.g'" ,$ 'is !.*.-'s9 "'! !&o ! "'! )i*g was &. io.s% a*d 'is a*g! ,. *!d wi"'i* 'i+. >ueen =ashti@s poor attitude and lack of respect cost her position as queen# Upon the ad%ice of his counselors, the king banned her from his presence and sent out officers into all the pro%inces to gather the most beautiful young women in the land so he could choose a new bride# 3sther, a beautiful young Kewess, was among the group of women chosen# $nd because of her e5cellent attitude, 3sther was chosen abo%e e%ery other woman to be queen of the most powerful empire on earth at that time# 7et@s look now at some of the differences in attitude between =ashti and 3sther that caused the second woman to gain all that the first woman lost#

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People With an Excellent Attitude endeavor to see every situation from the perspective of the one they seek to please.
;e can see a key attribute of a poor attitude in =ashti@s refusal to comply with her husband@s wishes# Cou see, people with a poor attitude are %ery sub?ecti%e and self'centered# hey refuse to consider anyone else@s point of %iewI instead, they see e%ery situation only from their own perspecti%e# )hat does this mean to me- they ask themsel%es# That,s all #,m interested in( &ecause people with a poor attitude only see things from their own perspecti%e, they are continually refusing to do what is asked of them by those to whom they are assigned# his is in direct contrast to people with an e5cellent attitude, who stri%e to understand their authorities@ point of %iew in order to better ser%e them# 0eople of e5cellence are interested not only in doing what they are asked to do, but in fulfilling their responsibilities to the best of their ability#
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A Person With an Excellent Attitude always prepares himself before approaching his authority.
3sther prepared herself well before she e%er attempted to con%erse with the king# his is an attribute of people with an e5cellent attitude# hey always prepare themsel%es before they speak# hey weigh out their words, not allowing inappropriate words to slip out accidentally# ;hate%er they say, they say on purpose because they know what they are saying is good and accurate# his is a manifestation of the quality described in 0ro%erbs )1418 4KJV5, referring to the %irtuous woman4 3S'! (! -!iv!"' "'a" '! +! -'a*dis! is good....3 his woman checked out her merchandise and concluded, D his is good#D "f it wasn,t good, she was going to change it before anyone else e%er graded it and said it was poor# "n the same way, a person with an e5cellent attitude makes any necessary ad?ustments as a part of his preparation to approach the person to whom he is assigned#
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hat@s what 3sther did# Cou see, she didn@t ha%e the right to go before the king anytime she wanted to# She couldn@t ?ust come to him and say, D" feel like talking to you about this matter right now# ;ho are you to tell me that " can@tAD 3sther would ha%e gained nothing by taking that approach# !o, 3sther understood what she had to do# herefore, she thoroughly prepared herself to approach the king:not only physically, but spiritually as well#

A Person With an Excellent Attitude prepares himself beforehand for the crisis he may face.
3sther didn@t ?ust assume that %ictory would be hers# She prepared herself so she would be ready for any crisis that might arise# "n 3sther 2411, she told Gordecai4 3Go% ga"'! a## "'! ?!ws w'o a ! ( !s!*" i* S'.s'a*% a*d &as" &o +!9 *!i"'! !a" *o d i*) &o "' !! da$s% *ig'" o da$. M$ +aids
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a*d I wi## &as" #i)!wis!. A*d so I wi## go "o "'! )i*g% w'i-' is agai*s" "'! #aw9 a*d i& I (! is'% I (! is'@3 3sther was saying, D3%eryone must fast and pray because " don@t know what is coming#D his young Kewess understood well the importance of preparation in order to recei%e fa%or from the person 8od has placed in authority# She was a rare woman indeed who continually displayed an e5cellent attitude#

A Person With an Excellent Attitude understands the importance of timing.

iming is %ery important to a person of e5cellence# 3sther understood that# She was going to enter the king@s presence without an in%itation, and she knew the king could ha%e her e5ecuted if her timing was off# &ut 3sther *41,2 tells us of the successful outcome because 3sther carefully waited for the proper time4 Now i" 'a((!*!d o* "'! "'i d da$ "'a" Es"'! (." o* '! o$a# o,!s a*d s"ood i* "'! i**! -o. " o& "'! )i*g6s (a#a-!% a- oss
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& o+ "'! )i*g6s 'o.s!% w'i#! "'! )i*g sa" o* 'is o$a# "' o*! i* "'! o$a# 'o.s!% &a-i*g "'! !*" a*-! o& "'! 'o.s!. So i" was% w'!* "'! )i*g saw >.!!* Es"'! s"a*di*g i* "'! -o. "% "'a" s'! &o.*d &avo i* 'is sig'"% a*d "'! )i*g '!#d o." "o Es"'! "'! go#d!* s-!("! "'a" was i* 'is 'a*d. T'!* Es"'! w!*" *!a a*d "o.-'!d "'! "o( o& "'! s-!("! . 3sther waited for the right time and therefore recei%ed the fa%or of both 8od and the king# ;e see in Kohn 2 that Kesus also understood the importance of timing# ;hen /is mother Gary asked /im to change the water into wine at the wedding in +ana, /e said to her, DGy hour has not yet comeD EKohn 242F# ;e ha%e no better e5ample than Kesus of someone who li%ed continually with an e5cellent attitude, so this statement of /is is %ery significant to us# Kesus knew that timing was crucial to a successful outcome in e%ery situation# Understanding the importance of timing also includes recogniJing when the timing is right in our own li%es to mo%e on to the ne5t season# &ut we need
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to understand this4 "f we do not prepare before that moment comes, it will ne%er happen# <ur attitudes today set the future seasons of tomorrow#

A Person With an Excellent Attitude complies from the heart.

3sther was able to gain audience with the king and rescue her people from destruction because of her attitude of willing compliance# <n the other hand, =ashti was unwilling to comply with the king@s wishes, adopting a defiant attitude instead# his is what the king@s counselor ad%ised him as a result4 3Fo "'! 7.!!*6s ,!'avio wi## ,!-o+! )*ow* "o a## wo+!*% so "'a" "'!$ wi## d!s(is! "'!i '.s,a*ds i* "'!i !$!s% w'!* "'!$ !(o "% 6Ai*g A'as.! .s -o++a*d!d >.!!* <as'"i "o ,! , o.g'" i* ,!&o ! 'i+% ,." s'! did *o" -o+!.6 3T'is v! $ da$ "'! *o,#! #adi!s o& P! sia a*d M!dia wi## sa$ "o a## "'! )i*g6s o&&i-ia#s "'a" "'!$ 'av! '!a d o& "'! ,!'avio o& "'! 7.!!*. T'.s "'! ! wi## ,! !4-!ssiv! -o*"!+(" a*d w a"'.
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3I& i" (#!as!s "'! )i*g% #!" a o$a# d!- !! go o." & o+ 'i+% a*d #!" i" ,! !-o d!d i* "'! #aws o& "'! P! sia*s a*d "'! M!d!s% so "'a" i" wi## *o" ,! a#"! !d% "'a" <as'"i s'a## -o+! *o +o ! ,!&o ! Ai*g A'as.! .s9 a*d #!" "'! )i*g giv! '! o$a# (osi"io* "o a*o"'! w'o is ,!""! "'a* s'!. Es"'! 111B81C So the king told =ashti in effect, D<kay, if you want to rebel, you can rebel# !o one can stop you# &ut you ha%e now disqualified yourself from being my queen#D hat@s one of the things about attitudes that most people don@t realiJe# $ person can be as rebellious as he wants, but he has to be ready to accept the consequences of his disqualifying attitude# !ow, you might read about >ueen =ashti and say, D=ashti didn@t really do anything wrong# She didn@t deser%e to lose her position as queenBD &ut remember, it doesn@t matter what you and " think is wrong# "t mattered what the 'ing thought was wrong# /e was the one with the power to Dpull the plugD on >ueen =ashti@s position as his queenB &esides, " can gi%e you a good reason why >ueen =ashti@s refusal to obey her husband was so dangerous4
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A poor attitude is contagious( $s the king@s counselor said in 3sther 141(4 3Fo "'! 7.!!*6s ,!'avio wi## ,!-o+! )*ow* "o a## wo+!*% so "'a" "'!$ wi## d!s(is! "'!i '.s,a*ds i* "'!i !$!s% w'!* "'!$ !(o "% 6Ai*g A'as.! .s -o++a*d!d >.!!* <as'"i "o ,! , o.g'" i* ,!&o ! 'i+% ,." s'! did *o" -o+!.63 his man understood that a poor attitude is contagious# /e knew that when the other women heard about the disrespectful way >ueen =ashti had treated her husband, they would act the same way# hat@s why we need to stay away from people with poor attitudes# Cou see, we will act according to the lowest le&el o* the people with whom we spend time( So who has 8od placed as the Dking,D or the authority, in your life, friendA $re you willing to obey that person from your heartA Some people answer that question by saying, D;ell, Kesus is the Ling in my life#D hat may sound good, but it only disguises their rebellious attitude if they are using that statement to discount the people 8od has placed o%er them in the different arenas of life# "f Kesus were truly the Ling in those people@s li%es,
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they wouldn@t ha%e a problem with obeying the laws of the land E-om# 1)41'(F or honoring their mother and father E3ph# 141')F# hey would also willingly obey their church leaders according to /ebrews 1)41(4 O,!$ "'os! w'o .#! ov! $o.% a*d ,! s.,+issiv!% &o "'!$ wa"-' o." &o $o. so.#s% as "'os! w'o +.s" giv! a--o.*". L!" "'!+ do so wi"' 5o$ a*d *o" wi"' g i!&% &o "'a" wo.#d ,! .*( o&i"a,#! &o $o.. !otice that 8od didn,t say in this %erse, D"f you want to and it feels all right to you, obey those who rule o%er you#D he words DobeyD and DwantD don@t go in the same sentenceB $n obedient attitude says, D" don@t necessarily hold the same opinion about this matter that you doI ne%ertheless, "@ll do what you ask me to do#D Gany times people only pretend like they are complying with their authorities so that they can a%oid being confronted about their rebellious attitude# &ut in reality, it@s e%ident that they are complying only in action, not from their hearts# Cou see, a person@s e5cellent attitude isn@t re%ealed merely by his act of obedience, but by his happy willingness to obey from his heart the person 8od has placed o%er him# "f he decides to continually defy his
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authority, he lea%es no recourse to that authorityI the relationship has to be broken# &ut in that case, it wasn@t the authority figure who broke the relationshipI that person did it with his defiance# ;hy is this trueA &ecause the moment a person defies his authority, he gi%es up his right to determine the consequences for his defiance# /e disqualified himself from ha%ing an opinion on that matter the moment he decided to demand his own way# 7et me put in another way# "f " defy the authority 8od has placed o%er me, " can@t go to that person afterward and say, D"@%e had a rebellious attitude toward you, but you@re a +hristian so you ha%e to forgi%e me#D !o, " ga%e up my right to say that person should forgi%e me the moment " defied him# ;hyA &ecause " sowed seed that was outside the ;ord of 8od# !ow " ha%e opened myself up to reaping a har%est that is outside the ;ord of 8od# <ur children learn the truth of this principle when we as parents ha%e to discipline them for doing wrong# hey often want to tell you what kind of punishment they should get for their offense# D" promise " won@t do it again, 6ad# 0lease, ?ust one swatBD ;hen my son $nthony would say that to me, "@d reply, D!o, you@re going to get three#D
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D0lease, 6ad, ?ust oneBD D<kay, you can ha%e four swats#D "t didn@t take long for $nthony to figure out that he had lost the right to determine the consequences for his misdeed and that he@d do better if he ?ust stayed quiet and took his punishmentB "n the same way, =ashti ga%e up her right to determine the consequences of her wrong attitude when she defied her husband# he minute she defied the king@s wishes, she turned herself o%er to someone else@s decision regarding her fate# "@ll tell you what:it@s ?ust better to get our attitudes right and to comply from the heart so we can stay in position for 8od@s fa%or and blessing in our li%esB

A Person With an Excellent Attitude understands that the first re uirement for favor is to be pleasing.
" don@t want the people with whom " ha%e
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relationships to ?ust endure me# " don@t want them to go through all sorts of trials ?ust to keep things on an e%en keel with me# " want to be a pleasing person to all the people in my life# .or instance, " lo%e my wife 7inda, and "@%e chosen to be pleasing to her# She doesn@t ha%e to beg me for it# She doesn@t ha%e to do anything to make me want to be pleasing to her# $s an act of my own will, " continually look for ways to please her because it is my desire to be a pleasing husband# " also want to please my superiors# " don@t want them to ha%e to ask me to do better at pleasing them# "n fact, " ne%er want those whom 8od has placed o%er me to ha%e to correct me about anything# !ow, if it becomes necessary for them to speak to me, " will recei%e their instruction without crying or trying to ?ustify myself# &ut meanwhile, " will keep seeking to please them as much as possible# 3sther understood this principle %ery well# She studied how to be pleasing to her husband, the king# She actually did e5tensi%e research in order to know how to be what her husband needed# $s a result, 3sther gained access into the presence of the king:a place >ueen =ashti could no longer go because she refused to be pleasing to her husband#

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!ow, 3sther@s achie%ement didn@t happen o%ernight# "t took about four years for the king to find someone who pleased him enough to be his new queen# 6uring that four years, his ser%ants tra%eled to 12( pro%inces, bringing back the most beautiful %irgins out of all those pro%inces# 3%ery young woman who was selected e%entually had the opportunity to spend time with the king# "f he wasn@t pleased with her, howe%er, she was placed in the house of the concubines, possibly ne%er to see the king again# &ut 3sther found fa%or with all those she came in contact with in the palace, including /egai, the king@s eunuch and custodian of the women4 Now "'! $o.*g wo+a* (#!as!d 'i+ DH!gaiE% a*d s'! o,"ai*!d 'is &avo 9 so '! !adi#$ gav! ,!a."$ ( !(a a"io*s "o '! % ,!sid!s '! a##owa*-!. T'!* s!v!* -'oi-! +aids! va*"s w! ! ( ovid!d &o '! & o+ "'! )i*g6s (a#a-!% a*d '! +ov!d '! a*d '! +aids! va*"s "o "'! ,!s" (#a-! i* "'! 'o.s! o& "'! wo+!*. Es"'! :1C ;hy did 3sther encounter fa%or where%er she wentA Because an excellent attitude is pleasing not
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1ust to one, but to many( Gost people are not willing to de%elop this quality in their li%es# hey think it is somehow condescending to become what another person needs# &ut that is e5actly what " want to do with my life# " don@t want to be what " want to be# " want to be what someone else needs me to be# "@m not interested in doing what " want to do# "@m interested in doing what the person to whom " am assigned wants me to do# DCes, but don@t you ha%e any thoughts of your ownAD !o, " don@t# Gy thoughts are all centered around how to be pleasing# 3sther understood how to be pleasing# hat@s why she was the one chosen to become queen in place of =ashti# hat@s also why 3sther became known as 3..."'! $o.*g wo+a* w'o (#!as!s "'! )i*g...3 E3sther 242F# "n the Dhouse of women,D the harem where the women waited for their audience with the king, 3sther prepared for the moment she would be summoned for her time with the king# She had watched the other women get together and talk about what they were going to take with them when it was their turn to go in to the king#
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&ut 3sther didn@t talk to the other women about how to win the fa%or of the king# She went to another man6/egai, the king@s eunuch and custodian of the women:and asked him what she should do to please the king# "n the end, the &ible says that 3sther pleased the king more than all the rest put together# ;hyA &ecause she studied how to be pleasing# he principle we can learn from 3sther is this4 0ou must gi&e a person what he doesn,t re+uire in order *or him to be open about what he truly desires( "f you go beyond someone@s e5pectations, you will immediately find out that what he wants is actually %ery small# $fter all, you@%e already gi%en him more than he would e%er ask forB "@%e had indi%iduals come to me and ask, D0astor -obb, what can " do for youAD " reply, D;ell, you can do so'and'so for me#D hen " find out later that these indi%iduals forgot to do what " requested# Cet they still come back and tell me again, D" really want to do what you want me to do#D !o, people like that don,t want to do what " want them to do# "f they really wanted to please me, they
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wouldn@t forget to do what "@%e already asked of them# hat ?ust puts me in the position of ha%ing to correct them, which is definitely not a pleasing position to be inB 3sther wasn@t like the indi%iduals " ?ust described# She understood that she had to gi%e what the king didn@t require in order to find out what he truly desired# hat@s what you must do as well if you want to be known as a person with an e5cellent attitude# .ocus on pouring goodness into the li%es of those to whom 8od has assigned you# Gake their needs more important than your own needs, and choose on purpose to be their problem'sol%er# <nce you turn your heart toward becoming pleasing to someone else, your life will be immediately begin to be enhanced:whether it@s through a promotion at your ?ob, a new sense of peace inside your home, etc# Gaybe your spouse will suddenly get more e5cited about spending time with you, or perhaps your boss will une5pectedly decide he wants to gi%e you a raise# ;hate%er the result, the cause will be the same4 0ou decided to *ocus on pleasing others rather than on pleasing only yoursel*(

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People With an Excellent Attitude are passionate about pleasing the ones to whom they are assigned.
35cellence means that the goal of pleasing those abo%e you becomes not ?ust your desire, but your passion( Cou see, the people to whom 8od has assigned you are the ones who can gi%e you the opportunity to become all /e has called you to be# Cou wouldn@t be where you are now if it weren@t for the people 8od has placed in front of you# herefore, how far you go forward in life depends on the quality of your attitude toward your authorities and how well you learn to sol%e the problems they face# " can use my own marriage as an e5ample# "f all my wife 7inda did was gi%e me a fit e%ery day, how far do you think she and " would go in lifeA " guarantee you, not %ery farB 7inda realiJes that the responsibility of our future is based on her as much as it is based on me# "@ll say it another way4 The promotion o* your *uture depends on the attitude you bring to the table( ;hen you maintain an e5cellent attitude, the person in
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front of you can concentrate on what 8od has called him to do instead of constantly ha%ing to turn around and fi5 what is behind him# hat@s important, because 8od ne%er called those who are in front of you to fi5 your yesterdaysI rather, you ha%e been called to help sol%e their problems of tomorrow# $ person with a poor attitude wants to turn that around# /e ne%er attempts to please othersI he ?ust pleases himsel*( ;hen >ueen =ashti didn@t go to the banquet according to the king@s wishes, she was pleasing herself and refusing to please her husband# &ut in the end, her poor attitude cost her dearly# Selfishness always does#

A Person With an Excellent Attitude is good to all# but fixes his goodness on a special few.
;e must work consistently at being pleasing to the few to whom we ha%e been assigned# "f we spread oursel%es too thin in our relationships with people, we will ne%er ha%e much of an impact on anyone@s life, nor will we reap any worthwhile har%est from the seeds we@%e sown#
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hink about it# "f we ne%er sow more than 198 inch deep in the li%es of fi%e thousand people, our har%est will only come from a crop that has 198'inch'deep roots# &ut suppose we decide instead to focus on sowing deep into the li%es of fi%e people to whom 8od has assigned us# "n doing that, we could increase our har%est one thousand timesB hat@s why we need to focus our seed:our in%ol%ement in the li%es of others for the purpose of blessing and benefit# <f course, we should lo%e and be kind to e%eryone# &ut we should focus our efforts of being e5cellent on the few to whom 8od has assigned us# " don@t want to be e5cellent with e%eryoneI "@m not stri%ing to go deep with a lot of people# " ?ust want to be e5cellent to a few# " understand that someone is always watching me who is greatly able to change my future# $nd if that someone has to choose between a person who always sows 198 inch deep into his life and someone who is focused on sowing deep into his life, which one do you think he is going to promoteA /e will promote the one who has the desire to sow deep:the one who is willing to put the time, commitment, and energy into finding new ways to bless him and to sol%e problems
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for him# hat@s important for you to know, for it helps e5plain why it,s better to be more to a *ew than to be less to many( &ut before you begin to focus your seed, consider this4 )hat +ualities do you ha&e that cause you to be noticed by others- hese are the qualities you should focus on as you seek to please those to whom 8od has assigned you# -emember, the qualities that make you different from others are the qualities that gi%e you significance in their li%es#

A Person With an Excellent Attitude is inviting to those to whom he is assigned.

&e in%iting to the people you communicate with# Gake sure e%eryone you come in contact with is blessed# hat@s how you promote yourself in a positi%e manner# Cou see, people want happy communicators around them# hey don@t want someone around them who is more of a commitment than a pleasure to know#
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;ith that kind of person, it sometimes takes forty'fi%e minutes to straighten out what he messed up in three minutes because his momma ne%er taught him the right way to act# his person was probably ne%er spanked for his poor attitudes# !ow the people close to him are continually catching the e5haust of those same poor attitudes ?ust because someone didn@t want to fulfill his or her responsibility in the past# $nd the people who ha%e to endure this person@s poor attitude today often ha%en@t done a thing to deser%e itB /a%e you e%er noticed that we take out our poor attitudes on the nicest people in our li%esA $fter all, a mean person wouldn@t let us get away with it# "f we tried to take out our bad moods on a mean person, he@d ?ust smack us sillyB So unless we ha%e learned to discipline our flesh, we ha%e a tendency to find the nicest person we can take ad%antage of and then let our poor attitude take o%er# hat@s where people got the idea that nice guys finish last# "t was ne%er supposed to be that way:and in 8od@s Lingdom, it isn,t that way# 3sther *42 tells us that, in the case of the king@s choice of a new queen, the nicest woman finished *irst7 So i" was% w'!* "'! )i*g saw >.!!*
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Es"'! s"a*di*g i* "'! -o. "% "'a" s'! &o.*d &avo i* 'is sig'"% a*d "'! )i*g '!#d o." "o Es"'! "'! go#d!* s-!("! "'a" was i* 'is 'a*d. T'!* Es"'! w!*" *!a a*d "o.-'!d "'! "o( o& "'! s-!("! . his %erse tells us that *a&or *lows in our direction when someone is happy to see us( $ wife might say, D" can@t understand why my husband doesn@t come home right after work#D ;ell, maybe he doesn@t come home for a reason# <r a husband may complain, D" can@t understand why my wife always cries#D Gaybe she cries for a reason# Garriage partners ?ust need to ask themsel%es this question4 %oes my attitude toward my spouse in&ite or repel communication3sther approached the king in a way that in%ited communication# hus, e%en though the king hadn@t summoned her, he stretched out his scepter to her and asked her what she desired# 3sther then began her plea for the li%es of her people by saying, 3I& I 'av! &o.*d &avo i* "'! sig'" o& "'! )i*g% a*d i& i" (#!as!s "'! )i*g "o g a*" +$ (!"i"io* a*d &.#&i## +$ !7.!s"...3 E3sther *48F# ;hy did 3sther say thisA Because pleasing our
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authorities is the re+uirement *or recei&ing *a&or( .a%or doesn@t come into our li%es until we gi%e those who are o%er us what they desire# ;e often make the mistake of e5pecting others to be pleased with what we want to gi%e them rather than what they actually want us to gi%e them# Kust think about the number of birthday and +hristmas presents people recei%e that they ne%er useB 0ersonally, " ha%e recei%ed about thirty'fi%e Dpastor mugsD o%er the years# $t this point, " need someone to gi%e me a cabinet instead of another mug so " ha%e a place to store them allB &ut in order to gain significance in the li%es of others, we must be willing to gi%e others what they desire, not what we want to gi%e them# his is how we obtain fa%or in their sight and become known as people with e5cellent attitudes#

A Person With an Excellent Attitude is willing to change for the benefit of others.

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"f " see something " need to change in my life in order to benefit others, "@ll change in a minute# " want to become e%erything my superiors want me to become# " don@t allow myself to e%en consider the e5cuse, D<h, that@s ?ust the way " am#D his is the %ery attitude that has made so many married couples miserable for so long# Some couples are se%enty'fi%e or eighty years old, ha%e despised each other for decades, and yet are still saying to each other, DCou@ll ha%e to accept me ?ust the way " am#D hese same couples often say with a certain sense of pride, D;ell, at least we@%e stayed together all these years#D ;hen " hear that comment from this kind of married couple, " tell them, D$re you kiddingA Cou ha%en@t been together for the last forty yearsB @ ogether@ means you ha%e your home in di%ine order# "t means you@re doing what the ;ord says and that you@re willing to change for the benefit of your marriage# @ ogether@ doesn,t mean that e%en though you get in your respecti%e @tanks@ e%ery day and shoot at each other, you don@t blow each other upBD $ person with a poor attitude li%es continually with the attitude, D ake me the way " am, or lea%e me# "@m not changing for anyoneBD .or instance, in the workplace, this person might agree to change anything
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in order to get a particular ?ob# &ut then after he gets hired, his super%isor asks, D7isten, could you please change this about yourselfAD Suddenly the new employee has a poor attitudeB he new employee tells his super%isor, D" can@t belie%e you want me to changeB Cou need to ?ust accept me the way " am#D D&ut " don@t like this particular characteristic of yours#D D hen why did you hire meAD D hat@s simple:" didn@t know you %ery well before " hired youBD his happens a lot in life# 0eople wait until they@re safe and secure in a ?ob, in a marriage, in a friendship, and so forth, before they begin to show who they really are# hen they get offended if someone who is in close relationship with them tries to e5amine them or help them correct their faults# hey say, D"f you were really my friend, you wouldn@t ask me to change#D D!o, " am your friend, and that@s why "@m telling you that you need to change:because if you don@t change your beha%ior in this area, we won@t be able to be friends anymore#D
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D;hat do you mean by thatA " don@t think you truly lo%e me#D D he %ery fact that "@m willing to tell you the truth pro%es that " lo%e you#D D hen why do you insist that " changeAD D&ecause " don@t ha%e any disposable relationships# " want a lifelong relationship with you, and "@m telling you what you need to do in order to make sure that comes to pass#D E+an you tell "@%e had this %ery con%ersation with more than one person in the pastA " ha%e to continually keep in mind what 0ro%erbs 2(41 says4 3Fai"'&.# a ! "'! wo.*ds o& a & i!*d....3F "n contrast, a person with an e5cellent attitude understands that lo%e is the %ery reason his superiors ask him to change# herefore, he is willing to accept greater e5amination from the people 8od has placed o%er him# Lnowing that they ha%e committed themsel%es to him, he therefore trusts their ?udgment# he truth is, when we lo%e someone with whom we ha%e relationship, we should be willing to change for that person@s benefit# <therwise, we are demonstrating that we only lo%e oursel%es# 7o%e must always be our moti%ator on the ?ob, in our homes, with our friends, and in our interactions with the world# "f someone
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close to us e5plains the benefit he will recei%e if we alter oursel%es in some way, we need to pray about the matter and be willing to change if the 7ord confirms it to our hearts# ;e may want to protest, D&ut people need to accept me the way " amBD hat isn@t necessarily true# 6o our actions contradict our confessionA "f we want to be e%erything our superiors need us to be, there can be no refusal in us to change# D&ut " can@t belie%e he would ask me to do thatBD "@ll tell you what we can belie%e4 8od will deli%er us from any situation that could ultimately harm us# Geanwhile, /e lo%es us so much that /e wants to help us stop sowing rebellion into the atmosphere# Cou see, /e knows that seeds of rebellion are destined to return to us as a har%est of negati%e consequences in the future# his is why we must always stay willing to change if we want to li%e as people of e5cellence#

A Person With an Excellent Attitude responds with $&he answer is yes'now what is the uestion%
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6o you want to make sure that you recei%e all the blessings 8od intends for you to en?oy through the people /e has placed o%er youA ;ell, this is a key principle for achie%ing that goal# E<f course, this principle presupposes that the authority respects his relationship with you too much to e%er request something unscriptural or unreasonable from you#F ;hen we li%e before our authorities with an e5cellent attitude of ser%anthood and lo%e, we@ll en?oy e%ery benefit possible from those relationships as we grow into a deeper, closer fellowship# <n the other hand, if we make our authorities DrequalifyD e%ery day for the right to speak into our li%es, we will ha%e relationships that are only one day deep and a thousand days long# his is often the problem in many marriage relationships# .or instance, a wife may make her husband continually requalify by pro%ing his lo%e for her# &ut how many days in a row should a husband ha%e to tell his wife he lo%es her before she belie%es he doesA "f a wife has a difficult time belie%ing that her husband can lo%e her, it@s a sure indication that she doesn@t really belie%e 8od lo%es her either# " ne%er want to make the people requalify whom 8od has placed o%er me# " belie%e what they tell me# "@m not going to say, D;ell, now, did you really mean
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thatAD oo many +hristians make 8od requalify /is lo%e for them on a daily basis and therefore ne%er en?oy what /e has already said is theirs# hey don@t en?oy the inheritance 8od has gi%en to them in +hrist Kesus because they still don@t belie%e it is theirs# hey don@t realiJe that 8od@s blessings are right in front of them, ready for them to pick up and recei%e by faith# 3%en when they read /is promises in the &ible, they say, D;ell, "@m not so sure that@s true for me#D "@%e decided "@m not going to make that mistake# "@m going to en?oy the benefits 8od has already said are mine# "@m also going to belie%e in the people /e has placed o%er me, maintaining the attitude that says yes before a question is e%en asked# " know that@s the way " can ensure 8od@s blessing on my life in the future#

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&he Excellent are well aware that their attitude is the historian of their past# the caretaker of their present# and the prophet of their future.
"n contrast, a person with a poor attitude doesn@t consider the future consequences for his rebellious words or actions# his was >ueen =ashti@s downfall# "f she had known she was going to lose e%erything, she would ha%e gone to that banquet# &ut she didn@t count the cost of the consequences# /er heart betrayed her, and her poor attitude disqualified her from future blessing, for the king ga%e her royal position to someone else who was better than she E3sther 1419F# Cou see, our attitudes originate from our hearts( his is why we must determine ne%er to con peopleI otherwise, sooner or later our hearts will betray us# So work on impro%ing the condition of your heart, friend# 8i%e your allegiance to 8od through a good attitude and the faith'filled words of your mouth# ;hen you do that, no man will e%er be able to take
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away from you the benefits and blessings you recei%e from 8odB

A Person With an Excellent Attitude is a picture of the wisdom from above.

$ person with an e5cellent attitude is a li%ing e5ample of what the &ible calls Dthe wisdom that is from abo%e#D Kames )41)'1( tells us what this di%ine wisdom looks like4 W'o is wis! a*d .*d! s"a*di*g a+o*g $o.; L!" 'i+ s'ow ,$ good -o*d.-" "'a" 'is wo )s a ! do*! i* "'! +!!)*!ss o& wisdo+. B." i& $o. 'av! ,i""! !*v$ a*d s!#&8 s!!)i*g i* $o. '!a "s% do *o" ,oas" a*d #i! agai*s" "'! " ."'. T'is wisdo+ do!s *o" d!s-!*d & o+ a,ov!% ,." is !a "'#$% s!*s.a#% d!+o*i-. Fo w'! ! !*v$ a*d s!#&8s!!)i*g !4is"% -o*&.sio* a*d !v! $ !vi# "'i*g a ! "'! !. B." "'! wisdo+ "'a" is & o+ a,ov! is &i s" (. !% "'!* (!a-!a,#!% g!*"#!% wi##i*g "o $i!#d%
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&.## o& +! -$ a*d good & .i"s% wi"'o." (a "ia#i"$ a*d wi"'o." '$(o- is$. !otice that %erse 1( says a person with a truly good attitude is ne%er a hypocrite# /e doesn@t display a good attitude in front of people and then start criticiJing and complaining behind their backs# =erse 18 goes on to say he goes through life as a peacemaker4 Now "'! & .i" o& ig'"!o.s*!ss is sow* i* (!a-! ,$ "'os! w'o +a)! (!a-!. <n the other hand, the person with a poor attitude is an unhappy person# /is unhappiness has nothing to do with the situations he faces in life# /e@s ?ust an unhappy person to begin with# =erse 11 tells us why4 Fo w'! ! !*v$ a*d s!#&8s!!)i*g !4is"% -o*&.sio* a*d !v! $ !vi# "'i*g a ! "'! !. $ +hristian who walks through life with a poor attitude is confused and in strife within himself# /e knows what to do, but he doesn@t do it# /e says he belie%es the ;ord, but he doesn@t act on it# /e says he lo%es 8od, but other things hold his attention# /e says 8od is first place in his life, but e%erything else comes before /im# $nd the list goes on and on# his is why a person with a horrible attitude is ultimately replaced by someone who is happy ?ust to be there# $ poor attitude is a chore to deal with, but it@s
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easy to put up with a person who lacks talent if he@s always happy# "n fact, an employer might hire someone else for his talent and still keep the person who is always happy on staff ?ust because he likes to be around someone like thatB $s 0ro%erbs 28412 says, 3Ha(($ is "'! +a* w'o is a#wa$s !v! !*" MrespectfulN#D " hope " ne%er come to a place in life where " think " am irreplaceable# he moment " think " can@t be replaced is the moment "@m in trouble# hat@s why " go through life ?ust happy to be where%er 8od sends me# " don@t think, 8h, no, # ha&e to do this again( !o, "@m ?ust glad " can be a blessing in e%ery situation " find myself in# =ashti was replaced because of her poor attitude# he king took his counselor@s ad%ice4 3I& i" (#!as!s "'! )i*g% #!" a o$a# d!- !! go o." & o+ 'i+% a*d #!" i" ,! !-o d!d i* "'! #aws o& "'! P! sia*s a*d "'! M!d!s% so "'a" i" wi## *o" ,! a#"! !d% "'a" <as'"i s'a## -o+! *o +o ! ,!&o ! Ai*g A'as.! .s9 a*d #!" "'! )i*g giv! '! o$a# (osi"io* "o a*o"'! w'o is ,!""! "'a* s'!.3 Es"'! 111C "n our modern society, we are %ery hesitant to say
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that one person is better than another one# &ut the &ible says here that 3sther was better than =ashti, and it all centered around the quality of each woman@s attitude# 3sther always maintained an attitude that reflected the wisdom from abo%e# his is the kind of e5cellent attitude that will always come out on top in the end#

A Person With an Excellent Attitude reali(es that respect gains him access into the lives of others.
;hen we show respect to those in authority o%er us, they will ask us to come closer# 3sther understood that# /er uncle Gordecai sent her the message, DCou ha%e to go in and see the king about his decree to destroy the Kews#D &ut she said, D" can@t ?ust go in unsummoned and unannounced# here is a proper way to approach the king#D 3sther had respect for the king@s position# She didn@t ?ust walk in the throne room and say, D<kay, Ling, we slept together a month ago, so now " ha%e the right to come in here and talk to you#D She prepared herself to approach the king in respect# $nd because
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she did, he asked her to come closer# She had found fa%or in his sight# 8od has a way that /e wants to be approached, too, but that@s something most +hristians ne%er learn# .or the most part, the modern $merican church has presented 8od only as a D6addy 8od#D &ut 8od is the $lmighty Ling as well, and /e desires to be approached as such# 0salm 1,,42 confirms this4 3E*"! i*"o His ga"!s wi"' "'a*)sgivi*g% a*d i*"o His -o. "s wi"' ( ais!....3 $merica is one of the only societies on the face of the earth that has no knowledge of a monarchy# $merican +hristians don@t understand what a king is, nor do they understand the concept of a king@s word being absolutely final# herefore, they tend to treat 8od with the contempt of familiarity# he Ling in%ited us to intimacy, but instead of treating that intimacy with respect, we became too familiar with /im# ;e began to enter /is throne room on roller skates, ?umping on 6addy 8od@s lap, and saying, DKust wrap your arms around me, KesusBD 6o you know that $merica and perhaps 3urope are the only places on the face of the earth where +hristians lack a sense of protocol and respect when it
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comes to approaching 8odA !one of the rest of the world takes 8od for granted like that# &ut where%er people show a lack of respect to 8od, their intimacy with /im suffers# Cet these same people often don@t e%en realiJe that 8od has mo%ed away from them# hey think they@re in the middle of the throne room of 8od, but they@re actually still outside playing in the playgroundB

People With an Excellent Attitude understand that what they respect will move toward them# but what they disrespect will move away from them.
his principle e5plains why respect gi%es us the right of access to a person@s heart# $ person who sees our e5cellence will mo%e toward us because he wants to take a closer look# &ut if that same person sees a lack of respect in our li%es, he will turn away and think, # certainly don,t want to be near people li'e that. his principle certainly holds true in marriages# $
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lot of di%orced couples claim that their broken marriage resulted from conflict o%er money# &ut it isn@t money that causes di%orcesI di%orce is almost always the result of poor attitudes# ;hen a spouse continually has a poor or disrespectful attitude toward the other marriage partner, he or she creates a situation in which there seems to be nowhere else to go and no other recourse but di%orce# <n the other hand, if a spouse is consistently lo%ing, forgi%ing, embracing, and submitting his or her heart continually to the other marriage partner, no one is going to walk away from thatB his factor of attitude will e%en supercede the factor of appearance in a marriage# .or instance, a man will not walk away from a gorgeous woman who is great to be with until she opens her mouth and starts speaking a constant barrage of negati%e words# &oth men and women will e%entually distance themsel%es from spouses who put more confidence in the way they look than in the way they are# !o wonder the &ible says that charm is deceitful and beauty is fleeting E0ro%# )14),FB

8)

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A Person With an Excellent Attitude reali(es that respect ualifies him for a deeper relationship with those to whom he is assigned.
"@%e ne%er seen it fail# ;hen " ha%e shown respect to a person, " ha%e always been in%ited into a deeper relationship# Cou see, " ne%er allow myself to take a person for granted# " posture myself in such a way that " am always the studentI " am always the one who is willing to learn# .rom that position of respect, " am in%ited deeper into the life of that person with whom " ha%e entered into relationship# Some of my friends ha%e told me, D;e@%e been friends for a while now# " want you to begin to take some things for granted in this friendship because we@%e grown so close#D &ut " won@t do that# " will not be buddies with my friends# " ha%e determined ne%er to take ad%antage of a friendship or to cross the line that leads to the contempt of familiarity# "@ll ne%er get o%er my respect
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of people# $ person with a poor attitude has no such con%iction# /e is no respecter of persons# /e doesn@t ha%e a poor attitude toward ?ust one personI he has a poor attitude toward e%eryoneB 3%en the people he likes can be the brunt of his disrespect# "f they say something he doesn@t like, he ?umps their case like a chicken on a Kune bugB $s a result, this person@s disrespect affects many people, not ?ust the person he is directly dealing with# his principle is seen in the words of the king@s counselor regarding >ueen =ashti@s display of disrespect toward the king4 3...>.!!* <as'"i 'as *o" o*#$ w o*g!d "'! )i*g% ,." a#so a## "'! ( i*-!s% a*d a## "'! (!o(#! w'o a ! i* a## "'! ( ovi*-!s o& Ai*g A'as.! .s.3 Es"'! 1112 his is why it@s so %ital to maintain an attitude of e5cellence# <nly when we are respectful of the people to whom 8od has assigned us will we be in%ited into a deeper relationship with them#

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People with an Excellent Attitude dont just take criticism) they are also uick to receive instruction.
;hen 3sther was first brought before the king, she didn@t tell him that she was a Kewess# ;hy notA &ecause she was quick to recei%e instruction from the man who had raised her4 Es"'! 'ad *o" !v!a#!d '! (!o(#! o &a+i#$% &o Mo d!-ai 'ad -'a g!d '! *o" "o !v!a# i". Es"'! :110 !ow, the &ible says that Gordecai was the nephew of 3sther@s mother# hat means 3sther had been taught how to li%e life by her cousinB 3%en after she became the queen, 3sther continued to recei%e instruction from Gordecai# "n her new position, she could ha%e had him killed before the sun went down, but instead she remained teachable because she had an e5cellent attitude# <n the other hand, a person with a poor attitude is stubborn# " see this quite often in churches, in
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businesses, in marriages, and in friendships# Stubborn people are no fun to be in relationship with# heir stubbornness shows ?ust how little they think of others# he only thing that is important to them is what they want# hey lo%e their own opinion more than they care for those who try to instruct them# hat doesn@t e%er ha%e to describe you, friend# Cou can decide to stay teachable, no matter what:always quick to recei%e instruction from those whom 8od has placed o%er you in authority#

People With an Excellent Attitude use the tools of their environment to maximi(e their effectiveness.
$s 3sther prepared for her time with the king, she underwent a regimen of soaking first in oil of myrrh for si5 months and then in beautifying perfumes and spices for another si5 months# his was her time of purification, during which she got rid of e%erything that was detrimental to her and added all she could that was beneficial to her# /ow did 3sther do thisA 9he used the tools o* her en&ironment to maximi:e her
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e**ecti&eness( $s " mentioned earlier, props were pro%ided in the king@s house of women so each woman could choose what she wanted to take with her when it was her turn to spend time with the king4 T'.s ( !(a !d% !a-' $o.*g wo+a* w!*" "o "'! )i*g% a*d s'! was giv!* w'a"!v! s'! d!si !d "o "a)! wi"' '! & o+ "'! wo+!*6s 7.a "! s "o "'! )i*g6s (a#a-!. Es"'! :11/ 3sther took full ad%antage of this pro%ision, but not in the same way the other women did# "nstead, she used great wisdom to determine which tools within her en%ironment would enhance her relationship with the one she was to gi%e herself to#

A Person With an Excellent Attitude is not too proud to ask uestions that will cause him to be pleasing to others.
0eople with a good attitude aren@t too proud to ask questions that will cause them to succeed# his is what
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3sther did# Ces, she used the tools in her en%ironment to enhance her relationship with the king, but she didn@t choose those tools without help# She was willing to ask the ad%ice of someone else who was more knowledgeable than she was on the sub?ect of pleasing the king4 Now w'!* "'! ". * -a+! &o Es"'! "'! da.g'"! o& A,i'ai# "'! .*-#! o& Mo d!-ai% w'o 'ad "a)!* '! as 'is da.g'"! % "o go i* "o "'! )i*g% s'! !7.!s"!d *o"'i*g ,." w'a" H!gai "'! )i*g6s !.*.-'% "'! -.s"odia* o& "'! wo+!*% advis!d. A*d Es"'! o,"ai*!d &avo i* "'! sig'" o& a## w'o saw '! . Es"'! :11F he rest of the young women took the props they wanted from the house of the women when they went to the king# &ut notice what 3sther did# She didn@t make that decision on her own# She humbled herself and asked for ad%ice from /egai, the king@s custodian of women# She asked him, D/ow do " get this done properlyA /ow do " get to the front of the packA /ow do " take a shortcut through the crowdA "@m not interested in what # think pleases the king# "@m asking you what you think " should take in order to please him#D
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3sther understood that she would ne%er succeed by gi%ing the king what she wanted him to ha%e instead of what he wanted her to gi%e him# So many people make that mistake# hey gi%e the person they@re assigned to what they want to gi%e him and then when he tries to correct them, they say, D/ow can you say that after all "@%e done for youAD D"@ll tell you what you@%e done for me# Cou@%e gi%en me a headacheBD 7et me help you here, friend# $n employee could be the greatest worker that an employer has e%er had# &ut the moment the pain that employee brings becomes greater than the problems he sol%es is the moment the employer will distance himself from him# he same holds true in e%ery area of life# hat@s why " don@t e%er take anything for granted in my relationships with those o%er me in authority# " keep a %ery low profile# " don@t enter a con%ersation with them thinking " know anythingI rather, " enter with humility and meekness# " always posture myself with my face bowed to the ground in respect, ready to recei%e whate%er counsel and wisdom my superiors want to gi%e me# $fter all, " know " can@t fall %ery far when "@m already face down on the groundB " also know that the
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moment " get a lofty idea about myself is the moment " will fall:and " intend to succeed in life, not fall on my faceB

A Person With an Excellent Attitude is openly loyal.

here is no question about where a person with an e5cellent attitude stands because he is openly loyal in his relationships with others# So many +hristians are not loyal in their relationships# .or instance, "@%e actually had people who, while staying as guests in my home, went out to dinner with indi%iduals who had publicly attempted to discredit me in the eyes of others# 3%en more amaJing to me is the fact that my guests thought nothing of doing such a thing# hey ne%er e%en considered how " might feel about it# ;hen a person with whom " ha%e a close relationship does something like that, where does he stand in that relationshipA ;ell, " belie%e relationships are like a light switchI they are either on or off# here is no Ddimmer switchD:with some relationships
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ha%ing a little more light and others ha%ing a little less light# !o, either the switch is on, or the switch is off# $ person is either loyal, or he is not loyal# "t@s that simple# 3sther was openly loyal to the king# 3sther 2422 talks about the time Gordecai learned of a plot to kill the king# $s soon as Gordecai informed 3sther of the plot, she informed the king4 So "'! +a""! ,!-a+! )*ow* "o Mo d!-ai% w'o "o#d >.!!* Es"'! % a*d Es"'! i*&o +!d "'! )i*g i* Mo d!-ai6s *a+!. 3sther said, DLing, "@m willing to stake e%erything " am on this report# " am loyal to you# Gordecai is loyal to you# ;e are on your side#D $s a result of the loyalty of 3sther and Gordecai, the assassination plot was aborted and the king@s life was spared#

A Person With an Excellent Attitude sees every contrary attitude as his enemy the moment he recogni(es it.
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;hen we deal with our own poor attitudes as soon as we recogniJe them, we encourage others to straighten up their poor attitudes# Kust think back to your childhood for a moment# ;hen your older brother or sister recei%ed a spanking, what happened to you and your other siblingsA Cou all straightened up, didn@t youA he older sibling got spanked, and e%eryone else ad?usted their beha%ior# Cou all learned from watching the guilty one recei%e the punishment he or she deser%ed# hat@s what the king@s counselor was talking about in 3sther 142,4 3W'!* "'! )i*g6s d!- !! w'i-' '! wi## +a)! Dagai*s" <as'"i6s !,!##io.s a-"E is ( o-#ai+!d "' o.g'o." a## 'is !+(i ! G&o i" is g !a"H% a## wiv!s wi## 'o*o "'!i '.s,a*ds% ,o"' g !a" a*d s+a##.3 "n the same way, if we make a practice of immediately dealing with e%ery poor attitude that arises in our li%es, we will cause e%eryone around us to impro%e in their attitudes as well# " don@t know about you, but " want to pass this attitude test for real instead of going around the same mountain again and again, one poor attitude after
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another, day after day after day# /owe%er, whate%er " achie%e in this arena of attitude, " want to do it through 8od# <therwise, it wouldn@t be real and it wouldn@t last# "@m interested in recei%ing true promotion from 8od in my life# " want the real thing# " don@t want to pretend like " ha%e my act together when " don@t# " want to be free of all pretension, but " don@t want anyone else doing it for me# "@m not interested in li%ing a life in which " continually displease those in front of me# " don@t want to blame e%eryone else for my own feelings of depression# "@m not going to spend my time thinking, #* only they were di**erent6i* they,d 1ust get their act together, i* they could 1ust recogni:e my gi*t, i* they could 1ust see in me what # 'now is in me6maybe then li*e would be di**erent *or me( 0eople don@t need to see anything inside of me# "@m showing e%eryone all they need to know about me on the outside through my attitudes# hat@s why "@%e decided to deal with e%ery one of my poor attitudes as soon as " recogniJe it# "@m determined to be known as a person with an e5cellent attitude e%ery day for the rest of my lifeB he story "@%e shared with you in this chapter is
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about two women with two %ery different attitudes# /owe%er, it doesn@t matter what gender or color you are or where you grew up# he scriptural principles still apply to you, for all distinctions disappear in +hrist Kesus# So this is my question to you4 )hich attitude are you going to adopt *or your li*e6Vashti,s or Esther,sCour ultimate success largely depends on your answer to that question, for the attitude you carry into each situation of life is often the key that determines the outcome# herefore, " urge you to make a quality decision to become a person with an e5cellent attitude# 8et serious about dealing with your poor attitudes as soon as you recogniJe them# "f you@%e been thinking someone owes you something ?ust for waking up in the morning, let go of that wrong thinking and start becoming a problem'sol%er for the people to whom 8od has assigned you# $s you choose to follow 3sther@s e5ample of e5cellence, " can assure you of this4 Cour life will begin to be greatly enhanced the moment you turn your heart toward pleasing someone else other than yourself# -emember, when you rule your attitudes, you rule your own heart, opening the way for 8od to
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make winning an e%eryday e%entB

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PRINCIPLES FOR APPROACHING AUTHORIT= WITH AN ATTITUDE OF EXCELLENCE

P!o(#! wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! !*d!avo "o s!! !v! $ si".a"io* & o+ "'! (! s(!-"iv! o& "'! o*! "'!$ s!!) "o (#!as!. A P! so* wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! a#wa$s ( !(a !s 'i+s!#& ,!&o ! a(( oa-'i*g 'is a."'o i"$. A P! so* wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! ( !(a !s 'i+s!#& ,!&o !'a*d &o "'! - isis '! +a$ &a-!. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! .*d! s"a*ds "'! i+(o "a*-! o& "i+i*g. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! -o+(#i!s & o+ "'! '!a ". A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! .*d! s"a*ds "'a" "'! &i s" !7.i !+!*" &o &avo is "o ,! (#!asi*g. P!o(#! Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! a ! (assio*a"! a,o." (#!asi*g "'! o*!s "o w'o+ "'!$ a ! assig*!d. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! is good "o a## ,." &i4!s 'is good*!ss o* a s(!-ia# &!w.
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A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! is i*vi"i*g "o "'os! "o w'o+ '! is assig*!d. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! is wi##i*g "o -'a*g! &o "'! ,!*!&i" o& o"'! s. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! !s(o*ds wi"' 3T'! a*sw! is $!sI*ow w'a" is "'! 7.!s"io*;3 T'! E4-!##!*" a ! w!## awa ! "'a" "'!i a""i".d! is "'! 'is"o ia* o& "'!i (as"% "'! -a !"a)! o& "'!i ( !s!*"% a*d "'! ( o('!" o& "'!i &.". !. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! is a (i-". ! o& "'! wisdo+ & o+ a,ov!. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! !a#iJ!s "'a" !s(!-" gai*s 'i+ a--!ss i*"o "'! #iv!s o& o"'! s. P!o(#! Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! .*d! s"a*d "'a" w'a" "'!$ !s(!-" wi## +ov! "owa d "'!+% ,." w'a" "'!$ dis !s(!-" wi## +ov! awa$ & o+ "'!+. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! !a#iJ!s "'a" !s(!-" 7.a#i&i!s 'i+ &o a d!!(! !#a"io*s'i( wi"' "'os! "o w'o+ '! is assig*!d. P!o(#! Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! do*6" 5.s" take criticism; "'!$ a ! a#so 7.i-) "o receive
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instruction. P!o(#! Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! .s! "'! "oo#s o& "'!i !*vi o*+!*" "o +a4i+iJ! "'!i !&&!-"iv!*!ss. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! is *!v! "oo ( o.d "o as) 7.!s"io*s "'a" wi## -a.s! 'i+ "o s.--!!d wi"' o"'! s. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! is o(!*#$ #o$a#. A P! so* Wi"' a* E4-!##!*" A""i".d! s!!s !v! $ -o*" a $ a""i".d! as 'is !*!+$ "'! +o+!*" '! !-og*iJ!s i".

No"!s1

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1,,

>UOTATIONS ON ATTITUDE
/ere are some thought'pro%oking quotations by unknown authors on the importance of our attitudes4 I +a$ *o" ,! a,#! "o -'a*g! +$ wo #d around +!% ,." I -a* -'a*g! "'! wo #d within +!. W! -a**o" di !-" "'! wi*d% ,." w! -a* ad5.s" "'! sai#s. I& $o. "'i*) $o. a ! ,!a"!*% $o. a !. I& $o. "'i*) $o. da ! *o"% $o. do*6". I& $o.6d #i)! "o wi*% ,." "'i*) $o. -a*6"% I"6s a#+os" -! "ai* $o. wo*6". Li&!6s ,a""#!s do*6" a#wa$s go "o "'! s" o*g! o &as"! +a*% B." soo*! o #a"! % "'! +a* w'o wi*s is "'! +a* w'o "'i*)s '! -a*. I"6s $o. attitude, *o" $o. aptitude, T'a" wi## d!"! +i*! $o. altitude. A (!ssi+is" is a (! so* w'o% !ga d#!ss o& "'! ( !s!*"% is disa((oi*"!d i* "'! &.". !.
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W! -a**o" -o*"i*.a##$ ,!'av! i* a +a**! "'a" is i*-o*sis"!*" wi"' "'! wa$ w! s!! o. s!#v!s. >.i""i*g is a (! +a*!*" so#."io* "o a "!+(o a $ ( o,#!+. T'! ! is *o w o*g sid! o& "'! ,!d9 w! g!" .( o* "'! w o*g sid! o& o. minds. N!v! #oo) ,a-) .*#!ss $o. wa*" "o go "'a" wa$. =o. *!v! g!" a'!ad o& a*$o*!% as #o*g as $o. a ! #oo)i*g "o g!" !v!* wi"' "'!+. I6+ *o" s. ! a## 'a(($ (!o(#! a ! g!*! o.s% B." I6v! *!v! s!!* a g!*! o.s (! so* w'o was*6" 'a(($. Attitudes d!"! +i*! actions. =o. a ! *o" w'a" $o. "'i*). What you think, you are. I" is .*&o ".*a"! w'!* (!o(#! a##ow "'!+s!#v!s "o g!" #i)! -o*- !"!IA## +i4!d .( a*d (! +a*!*"#$ s!".

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CONFESSION OF FAITH FOR AN EXCELLENT ATTITUDE

" ha%e an attitude of e5cellence, and " am growing in the 7ord# "@ll be different tomorrow than " am today, for " am changing from glory to glory and from one le%el of e5cellence to the ne5t# " will allow 8od by /is Spirit to continually moti%ate me to become better, rise higher, and achie%e more than " e%er ha%e before# " will approach each situation with an e5cellent attitude and e%ery relationship with a desire to pleaseB "@m going to go further# "@m not going to quit# "@m going to press on# "@m going to press through# " am going to reach for 8od@s highest# "@m going to be e%erything /e has called me to beB

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PRA=ER OF SAL<ATION
0erhaps you ha%e ne%er been born again and therefore ha%en@t e%en begun the pursuit of e5cellence in 8od# "f you ha%e ne%er recei%ed Kesus +hrist as your personal 7ord and Sa%ior and would like to do that right now, ?ust pray this simple prayer4 6ear 7ord Kesus, " know that " am lost and need Cour forgi%eness# " belie%e that Cou died for me on the +ross and that 8od raised Cou from the dead# " now in%ite Cou to come into my heart to be my 7ord and Sa%ior# .orgi%e me of all sin in my life and make me who Cou want me to be# $men# "f you prayed this prayer from your heart, congratulationsB Cou ha%e ?ust changed your destiny and will spend eternity with 8od# Cour sins were forgi%en the moment you made Kesus the 7ord of your life# !ow 8od sees you as pure and holy, as if you had ne%er sinned# Cou ha%e been set free from the bondage of sinB

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