Social Skills Quotes

“Without active listening, you can not adequately contribute to civil discourse.”
― Milan Kordestani, I'm Just Saying: A Guide to Maintaining Civil Discourse in an Increasingly Divided World

“In a sense, trust is simply a stronger, more grounded version of faith.”
― Milan Kordestani, I'm Just Saying: A Guide to Maintaining Civil Discourse in an Increasingly Divided World

“They served to remind Cabal - should a reminder ever be necessary - why his social skills were so poor: people were loathsome and not worth the practise.”
― Jonathan L. Howard, Johannes Cabal the Detective

“Intellectual honesty means pursuing the truth regardless of whether or not it serves your interests or goals.”
― Milan Kordestani, I'm Just Saying: A Guide to Maintaining Civil Discourse in an Increasingly Divided World

“Fierce love speaks to the energy that flows through a relationship. Energy keeps a relationship vital.  Fierce denotes a powerful energetic force that is present in our conversations, during lovemaking, even during a relaxing game of cards. We see our relationship as a living breathing being, a being with a pulse, needs, and a purpose.  Your job is to keep this being fed, energized, and vitally alive.  ”
― Susan Scott, Fierce Love: Creating a Love that Lasts---One Conversation at a Time

“Who wouldn’t appreciate maintenance free, guaranteed fresh, organic and self-cleaning relationships!  We want the happily ever after of fairy tales and the conflict-free marriages that only exist in televised fantasies.  Real relationships take time, energy, and daily care and feeding”
― Susan Scott, Fierce Love: Creating a Love that Lasts---One Conversation at a Time

“That “teaching myself social behaviors” thing, for example, was a window into my entire childhood, adolescence, and early adulthood. There were things I needed to learn differently from most of the people around me, and the amount of useful, appropriate support I received back then was exactly zero. At the same time, the criticism I received felt infinite, especially when I tried to articulate my struggles. A person who I probably shouldn’t have been friends with once told me I needed to stop “thinking things through” in social situations and just “let my instincts take over.” In retrospect, I wish I’d replied, “What the hell are you talking about, ‘let my instincts take over’?” He might as well have said, “Just try really hard to grow a third arm between your shoulder blades and eventually it’ll happen!” Nothing about those situations felt instinctive; I had to learn how to navigate them in other ways”
― Mike Jung, [Don't] Call Me Crazy

“No one completes us.  No one is our missing piece, our other half.  We complete ourselves or fail to.   No one else could be successful in that role because each of us is utterly unique.  There isn’t another “you” anywhere on this planet.  If you somehow feel incomplete, the answers aren’t out there somewhere.  The answers are in the room.  You have them.  ”
― Susan Scott, Fierce Love: Creating a Love that Lasts---One Conversation at a Time

“Why, oh why doth people gazeth into their damn'd phones in a restaurant when there is good fayre and wond'rful company to be enjoy'd?”
― Kevin Ansbro

“Your name?" George asked him directly. He had probably seen the man a dozen times before yet did not know anything about him. King Davit would have no doubt have known half the man's history already.
"Henry."
George took Henry's hand firmly in his own and looked into his eyes. This had to be done delicately, to make sure this Henry did not think him a fool. He tried to think of how his father would do it.
"Thank you, Henry, for your concern. It is a comfort to know I am so well guarded. I will make sure to praise you when next I speak to the lord general. But for now I think there is no need to worry.”
― Mette Ivie Harrison, The Princess and the Hound

“How much love you have is up to you and while it may seem complicated, it isn’t.  Not really. It’s all about our conversations.  By having honest, courageous, meaningful conversations with your partner, you can foster true connection and a fierce love that will withstand the test of time and grow stronger over the years.”
― Susan Scott, Fierce Love: Creating a Love that Lasts---One Conversation at a Time

“I don’t think we talk enough, as a species, about how ridiculously difficult it is to make basic conversation. People act like it should be fun, but it isn’t. It’s like playing tennis, and you have to stay permanently perched on the balls of your feet just to work out where the ball is coming from and where it’s supposed to go next. Is it their turn? My turn? Will I get there fast enough? Have I missed my shot? Did I just interrupt theirs? Am I hogging the ball? Is this a gentle back-and-forth rally, just to waste time, or would they prefer one of us to just smack it into the corner?”
― Holly Smale, Cassandra in Reverse

“Marriage is the Rubik's Cube of the 21st Century - something young people are fascinated with but have no idea how to do.”
― Stewart Stafford

“A loving heart is not enough to develop a successful relationship. Considerable EQ and social skills are necessary.”
― Anoir Ou-Chad

“[A]lthough I well know
how hard it is for a man of genius with a seriously underrated subject to
maintain serene and kindly relations with the men who underrate it, and who
keep all the best places for less important subjects which they profess without
originality and sometimes without much capacity for them, still, if he
overwhelms them with wrath and disdain, he cannot expect them to heap
honors on him.”
― George Bernard Shaw, Pygmalion

“I am sick with
my own self-judgment
masquerading as my assumptions
about other people’s judgments of me.”
― Vironika Wilde, Love and Gaslight

“Come to every conversation with three prepared stories to tell. Sometimes others do not want to talk, and by having some talking points in mind, you will always have the conversation flowing.”
― Trevor Carss

“Leadership reflects an orientation to promote, direct, and manage social action. This orientation is grounded in a need for dominance and constructive power. The effective engagement of leadership processes follows from high self-confidence and from significant cognitive and social capabilities.”
― christopher peterson, Character Strengths and Virtues: A Handbook and Classification

“What people describe as "authenticity" is an excuse to treat others poorly at least 70 percent of the time”
― Kelly Williams Brown, Adulting: How to Become a Grown-up in 468 Easy(ish) Steps

“Whatever advice you read or hear, remember that you do not have to accept how the extraverted three-quarters of the population defines social skills—working the room, always having a good comeback, never allowing "awkward" silences. You have your own skills—talking seriously, listening well, allowing silences in which deeper thoughts can develop.”
― Elaine N. Aron, The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You

“A key to whether friendship is good is: Who am I being in this connection? Do I like me? (Never mind do I like you!) Am I liking how I'm showing up? Does this feel good to me?”
― Sonia Choquette

“One who tolerates little, has to tolerate the most.”
― Raheel Farooq

“In these meetings Palandine was teaching me how to use my eyes and ears in a manner that complemented the teachings of Calyx and Mila.

“And you have to use that wonderful smile of yours more often, Elim.”

“What’s that got to do with listening?”

That was the subject, and Palandine had typically made a jump in logic I couldn’t follow. She also forgot that I was a Cardassian male and smiling was not one of our strong features.”
― andrew j robinson

“What did he mean? What does he want me to share with him? What was the correct response? I wish people would just tell me what it is I need to say to make them happy with me instead of constantly expecting me to guess.”
― Holly Smale, Cassandra in Reverse

“I am no longer able to pretend that I am not the problem here. I can­not delude myself into thinking that I am the victim, the un­deserving casualty of bad romantic luck, the poor princess tied to a rock in chains against her will.

I am making the rock, over and over again; they are my chains.

Thanks to my new gift, I am literally watching myself repel my future boyfriend away from me over and over again, and it’s making me wonder just how many people I’ve done this to in my life already, without even realizing it. How many people have I repelled with the wrong word in the wrong tone at the wrong time, with a hostile or blank facial expression, an in­ability to make eye contact? How many people were supposed to be in my life before I accidentally sent them spiraling away?

And it’s this realization—that it’s my problem, and therefore one that I can solve—that snaps me out of it.”
― Holly Smale, Cassandra in Reverse

“How do people do this? How do total strangers weave conversation back and forth like this without tying themselves up in knots? How do they know what to say next? More importantly, why? It's like watching a musical where they all break into the same dance without rehearsing it first: totally inexplicable.”
― Holly Smale, Cassandra in Reverse

“Not everyone obsesses, analyzes, struggles to let go and move on. Not everyone holds on to every single social interaction with their fingertips in terror, as if dangling off a cliff's edge.”
― Holly Smale, Cassandra in Reverse

“The problem with not having anybody to tell you what to do, i understood, is that there was nobody to tell you what NOT to do”
P. 264”
― Augusten Burroughs, Running with Scissors

“A deep question asks about someone’s values, beliefs, judgments, or experiences—rather than just facts. Don’t ask “Where do you work?” Instead, draw out feelings or experiences: “What’s the best part of your job?” (One 2021 study found a simple approach to generating deep questions: Before speaking, imagine you’re talking to a close friend. What question would you ask?)


A deep question asks people to talk about how they feel. Sometimes this is easy: “How do you feel about…?” Or, we can prompt people to describe specific emotions: “Did it make you happy when…?” Or ask someone to analyze a situation’s emotions: “Why do you think he got angry?” Or empathize: “How would you feel if that happened to you?”


Asking a deep question should feel like sharing. It should feel, a bit, like we’re revealing something about ourselves when we ask a deep question. This feeling might give us pause. But studies show people are nearly always happy to have been asked, and to have answered, a deep question.”
― Charles Duhigg, Supercommunicators: How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection

“Looping for understanding, until you understand what someone is feeling.


Looking for what someone needs: Do they want comfort? Empathy? Advice? Tough love? (If you don’t know the answer, loop more.)


Asking permission. “Would it be okay if I told you how your words affect me?” or “Would you mind if I shared something from my own life?” or “Can I share how I’ve seen others handle this?”


Giving something in return. This can be as simple as describing how you feel: “It makes me sad to hear you’re in pain,” or “I’m so happy for you,” or “I’m proud to be your friend.”
― Charles Duhigg, Supercommunicators: How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection