Have not been blogging recently, because I have not been in the best frame of mind, however after a happy weekend I have caught up with several. Sorry to put some not so happy personal stuff onto my happy blog, but just want to get all this off my chest. So please forgive me, and if you dont want to know about all this "Woe is me stuff", go to the next lot of posts which are much happier.
An apology as well in advance I published this and did not realise it was so long and rambling....sorry
An apology as well in advance I published this and did not realise it was so long and rambling....sorry
It seems that I must soon leave this lovely place. After many years of poor treatment and downright rudeness by my partner's family, I finally said what needed to be said to my partners son, ....as a reaction to some trouble they caused between us. (No, I did not use a single swear word...as someone asked)...don't need to, can get a point across without resorting to that.
Anyway a couple of days after that, the daughter rang him and has given him the ultimatum that if I dont go she will never see him again....and of course she is his only daughter, so I lost the lottery....and have been told I have to go. i hate to think what would have happened if I had had the run in with her, but have never had a cross word between us. It seems that after 23 years her father says he and I have never been "compatible".
Funny thing that, I thought we were just people with different personalities who got on well, and complimented each other, but then I did give in a lot, although it is not the first time I have begun to pack...but thought we had aged and got through all the bumpy bits.
So is it to be flight or fight....having to start over at 73 is so daunting...but the up side is we are joint tenants on the deeds of the property so they cannot force me to go until I want to go and find somewhere I want to be.
I am told that when I was little, about 3, my grandfather said of me (after he had teased me and I said "gunna tell my Daddy on you") that they would have to watch "that one, she is a little fighter".....and he was right I have been a fighter, standing up for my rights all my life...so I guess this is not going to be much different.
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| Early days at "the farm" note the gloves... city girl discovered snakes and spiders so the boots and gloves were my protection. |
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| Goodbye Honda but will take the hat It has certainly become battered over the years. |
The up side is that this time I wont have 3 kids, a cat and a dog to worry about, as I had when I left 20 years of a marriage with a violent alcoholic.....and i only have to cook for one now we are just officially two people living under the one roof, and I wont have to push that damn mower over one more hill, or cart one more rock, or cut down one more vine.....just water my lovely flowers and nurture them.
There has been a bit of ugliness, and hurtful things said to me, and I am sure that all the excess fluid I have been carrying round making the bathroom scales say I am heavier than I would like to think I am has left my body...so by the time I leave I could be trim, taut and terrific like I was when I came into this 23 years ago.
The pension people have been wonderful and got me some counselling, but I must say thank you to all my cyber friends...just reading all your comments about each other, and what a wonderful community I belong to, knowing I do have this other world I can turn to has been what has kept me going.
That and the fact that I am one tough old bird on the outside even though marshmallow inside has got to have some effect. I am keeping him happy, by packing boxes with stuff I dont use or really need but cant throw out, and checking the internet for somewhere to live, and while I am doing that he is calm and happy..........it will be interesting to see how I can get on without some of this stuff.
Have been wanting to get this all off my chest, and now I have, dont have to say any more. I am sure I will get a lot of support, and thank you in advance.
Now! back to stitching....and by the way my clever son fixed my computer...took him under 10 minutes....Mr. Smarty Pants....just loves to let Mum know how clever he is, and I love him to bits, and so proud that I have reared them to be so respectful of my partner regardless of how he is.
Maybe the old boy has just turned into a silly old git and the afternoon scotches have addled his brain.
I
As we Americans say, "You go, girl!!!!" I'm so sorry to hear of your situation. However, I have no doubt you will succeed wherever you are. I'm sure this hurts, but you can do it! You can start over, no matter what the age. I'm sending hugs and good thoughts your way.
ReplyDeleteGood luck with your next phase of life Shirley. You know where we are.
ReplyDeleteYou can chose your friends....
What a horrible experience ..my thought is that you will be better off on your own ....you seem to be a very strong person...sometimes we stay with something just because it's what we are used to and it isn't until that's gone that we realise how much better we are without it ....it won't be an easy journey but just think it can't be worse than you are feeling now and everything will get better......one door shuts another one opens....keep your chin up .....Lorna
ReplyDeleteI wish you happiness and success and peace of heart. I will pray that you find the perfect place to live with wonderful people around you. I know you will succeed at whatever you put your mind to.
ReplyDeleteBest Regards,
Cathy from Arizona
Good luck Shirley, with your search for a new home and a new start - I'm hoping for you that the sad times are short lived and that the future, though uncertain, leads to peace and contentment. Will be thinking of you. Lesley x
ReplyDeleteIt is sad the situation you find yourself in after all these years, Shirley. Your life is going to move in another direction now and you are strong. As the song says - 'You are woman". We are very resourceful and I am sure happier times are ahead for you. You can rely on my support, now, and into the future, your loving friend Di.
ReplyDeleteI am here if ever you need a friend to yell at or talk at or whatever Shirley.
ReplyDeleteYou are a terrific lady and you deserve the best...maybe the door to the best is just now opening!
Tina xo
Oh my gosh Shirley. I can't imagine what you must be feeling. I am so sorry about your partner's family being such butt heads! I don't understand family sometimes. I know that you will make it - you are strong and you have wonderful children to help you and you do have all of us here in the internet. Take care and stay strong.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry about your situation, and hope all works out for you.
ReplyDeleteToday is the first day of the rest of your happy life! I am gonna be happy for you! Have fun, whatever you do!!! Just don't stop stitching!!! When you get into your new address, I will send you that book as a housewarming!!! Take care...and loads of hugs I am sending your way!
ReplyDeleteShirley, You should never apologize for needing a moment to rant on your own blog. Your followers if they are really followers of your blog will be understanding and supportive.
ReplyDeleteI am so very sorry about your situation. I know that words cant not heal all pain but may they at least comfort you while you go through this situation. You are strong and i am sure you will with time find a happy place to be and live.
I am sending strong hugs your way!!
Ann Flowers
[email protected]
Oh Shirley,our thoughts and good wishes are with you. I hope you find a good place to live.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Deepa
I haven't posted before but I do love reading your blog. I am so sorry about the state you find yourself in but no doubt it will be on towards a much better next phase of your life.
ReplyDeleteRebuilding must be hard but I wish you well.
I feel so sad for you Shirley, but then there is always an adventure around the corner and I think you are the sort of person who will find it, and maybe wonder why you worried so much when you do.
ReplyDeleteMy goodness Shirley, you have been an inspiration to me over this year since I found you on here. I have loved what you create and know you're a very special person. Be strong and realize that there are many wishing only success for you
ReplyDeleteHow sad, but know that there are many out here in blogland that wish you only the best, you've inspired me with your beautiful crafts and your friendliness. Wishing you a happy future. I'll be looking for you on stitchin fingers.Hugs A.T.
ReplyDeleteHang in there Shirley you will be the winner in the end and we all know who the loser will be.
ReplyDeleteTake care of yourself and know that you have friends who will be thinking of you.
Regards Doreen
Oh, Shirley, I have only just found you and what a story! I can only echo the other comments, good luck! I am sure it will work out for you and for the best, sadly there does not seem to be any future where you are now. You seem to be a very clever lady, you will figure it out!:))
ReplyDeleteHere we have a famous saying " This too will pass away" So your worries passes away and bring you cheers soon. we are always here to give you moral support.
ReplyDeleteHello Shirley, I am very sorry for your situation. We have never met in person and we probably never will but somehow I know that you are a strong woman. And you know as well as I do that there is always something good coming out of a painful situation. Unfortunately, we can not see these good things while we are in this situation. They reveal later. I wish you courage and strength. And we are allowed to feel week and sad and shed some tears from time to time. Good luck, girl.
ReplyDeleteSorry to read about your troubles, I hope it helped 'getting it off your chest'. I wish you happiness for your future wherever that may be. Good luck...x
ReplyDeleteOh Shirley, I am all with you at the other side of the world. You are a strong woman and it will turn out to your best. It could not go on like that and this is certainly the best solution. So glad you put it all down here on your site so you could feel lighter and we with you. Anneliese
ReplyDeleteOh my...hard words do hurt...however your inner strength will shine through...moving on to uncertain terrain has got to be scary...one step at a time...you'll get to where you are meant to be...please know there are many good thoughts & well wishes being sent to you as you travel this journey...Remember that...
ReplyDelete"light within" will shine brilliantly...it's in YOU Shirley........
Dear Shirley, I'm so sorry to read of your turmoil. Sometimes we just struggle through situations, and make the best of things, and then before you know it, decades have passed. I admire your fortitude, just pick yourself up, and dust yourself off, it will indeed be their loss.
ReplyDeleteMy thoughts and good wishes are with you, I'll be keeping my fingers crossed, your transition will go smoothly.
{Hugs} friend,
Jo
Oh Shirley, I have just been catching up on blogs and have read your sad news. Hang in there, you have many blogging mates, you can rant and rave as long and as often as you like. I am sure there will be some new excitements in store for you. Cheers, Robin
ReplyDeleteShirley this is the first time I have commented on your blog. My thoughts are with you, take your time and do things your way. Life sometimes can be very sad and hard but if wishes and prayers give you strength you have mine.
ReplyDeleteShirley as sad as it may seem at the moment maybe this is just part of your healing journey to a much greater life ! just know you are surrounded by friendship and you now have the power to embrace a new life and new dreams. sounds like you have a wonderful son who will help you achieve new happiness . sending you love and hugs and the strength to move forward
ReplyDeletebest wishes
michelle
Hello Shirley, this is the first moment I've had to check your blog this week. I totally agree with all of our other blogger mates. You stand up for your rights, get what is rightfully yours, make a new and better life, and remember, your friends are with you. We may only be cyber friends, but we still feel for you and wish you well. I can see by your family photos that you have support, and I do wish you well. We have been forming a friendship lately, and one I'm eager to have that continue. You are a kind and giving person, and someone I'm pleased to have met. If it had not been for our mutual love of stitching, that may not have been so, and I would have been the poorer for that. Stay strong, you know you can do this.
ReplyDelete