URGENT PRAYERS NEEDED!!!!!!!

Cancer doesn't care what your age is. It doesn't care what your name is. It doesn't if you're rich or poor, the color of your skin, or who your parents are. Cancer doesn't care if you have your life planned out or even if you're right in the middle of watching all of your dreams come true. It's faceless and often symptom less until it's gripping you so tightly that it can't be ignored or explained away. Cancer doesn't knock on your door and it certainly doesn't wait patiently on your steps until you've invited it in. It's angry without provocation. Ugly. It'll bring you to your knees in prayer like nothing else can. Will you pray with me?
A very dear friend of mine is entering a battle against the monster known as neuroblastoma. Not a battle for her own life, but a battle for her son's. If you think about it, maybe it is a battle for her own life. Her kids are HER life. As a parent, I'm hurting for her. I know how precious life is and how it feels to cry and worry and wonder. I've spent what feels like a million lifetimes walking those hospital hallways with God at my side. Begging and pleading for answers and relief for my child. No, I've never battled a monster like hers, but I've rocked my baby at death's door and been blessed to come out the other side with my child still in my arms. As a friend, I want to be angry FOR her. I want to shoulder the grief and take it all in for myself. I want to feel it for her so she can concentrate on the battle that is her future-her son's future. Logan is just a little boy, barely older than my Laney. Cute as can be and a real firecracker. When he's healthy, he's precocious and full of imagination. Vivacious and full of life to the point of bursting. He's the kind of son I've always wanted and the kid that I most envy her for being blessed with. (Yes, I've been coveting her kid!) Her son is a ray of sunshine on the darkest of days and I swear, her day would have to get just a little bit brighter each morning when his feet hit the floor. I know I can't help but smile when I watch him play.
Logan was diagnosed just 2 days ago with an aggressive neuroblastoma. At least a stage 3, possibly stage 4 when the biopsys are complete, it's inoperable at this time but we hope that, with chemo, it will shrink so that a surgery will become an option for him. I'm asking that you pray for Logan and his family as they start this battle with the monster. Together we can storm the gates of heaven on Logan's behalf. Pray for the doctors treating him, the staff that will be caring for him, the people that love him who will be walking this road with him. Pray for his sisters, 3 of them, as they try to just take all this in, too young to really understand anything. Pray for relief from pain and rest when he's weary. Pray for good judgment in decision making. Pray that every avenue is explored and that no stone is left unturned. Pray that the right treatments are given. Pray for remission. Please, if you feel led, tell your friends, your worship centers, your youth groups. Pray for Logan.

Long Awaited Review For CSN Stores

I was supposed to do this review for csnstores.com a long time ago. It took the girls a lot longer than expected to select the item to review. Better late than never- I always say. We selected a Little Tikes rocker in pink. No, that is NOT my Laneybug in the picture I've posted. There is a reason for that though. We were really excited when we ordered the rocker. Little Tikes is usually a good brand name and Laney's really been wanting her own rocker. It looked sturdy and cute. Until we put it together and she started sitting in it. The thing fell apart within a few days of usage. The screws loosen themselves and the seat falls out! This chair is cute, but not worth the price. Laney is a tiny thing at less than 30 pounds. The screws should not loosen up so easily. The plastic seemed to just give enough for the screws to strip out. After rocking/sitting for just a few days (Laney, not me) I was finding screws everywhere. Seems like a choking hazard to me. Little ones could easily get those screws in their mouth:( Buyers beware! This chair was a big disappointment!

Encouragement Came In The Mail

Things are hard right now. McNabb Land is not a cheerful place to be and I make terrible company. I've been sad since my dad left and worried about my mom. My girls have so many questions that I don't know how to answer. They just don't understand why grandpa doesn't want to be grandpa anymore. I don't understand either. I don't have all the answers they're needing. I don't have ANY of the answers they're needing. He didn't even call me on my birthday. I had called him a day or two before and invited him for a visit on my birthday. He said he'd come. He told me a time and sounded like he meant it. I waited all day. He never came. He never called. I feel foolish for wasting my tears, but I cried like a child. My heart shattered. I don't have a dad anymore. He chose this. Why are we the ones who have to suffer his mistakes? I was already dealing with Bobby's illness and Laney's issues, now this? How much can one person shoulder?
So I was feeling really down and sad. I've tried to pull myself out of this black hole mood I've been in. I've just been failing at it. I've felt a little rejected, unloved, uncared for. I've had some ugly thoughts and feelings. Thoughts too ugly to write or speak. But not today. Today I feel special and loved and cared for. Today I feel hope and strength. Today I feel worth loving. Today I found encouragement in my mailbox.
I was fortunate enough to win a book from Kate's blog. She was offering the book 'Life, In Spite of Me' and I felt led to read it. I was thrilled that I won and couldn't wait to get it. I expected to find hope inside those pages. I expected to find a beautiful message about God's love, about never being forgotten or left behind by HIM. I knew as I opened the package that I was looking someone who might understand. Hopefully, the book might provide that for me. It did. But it provided so much more than that. I'm not sure if Kate understood what her little notes would mean to me. I'm sure she could never IMAGINE what they would mean to me. I don't even have the words to describe it. All I can say is....thank you Kate. Finding your notes throughout the pages of my book was a blessing.

Is Anyone There?

It's been a long time since I published a post. I've written-but haven't really felt confident enough to hit that publish button. Maybe I won't this time either, but I just have to have an outlet right now. I just need to feel like someone's there for me. I've prayed a lot about the feelings and thoughts I've been having. I KNOW He listens.

My father left my mother last week. She woke up and he was gone. How do you walk away after 32 years of marriage? Not even a backwards glance. Just there one day and gone the next. I know I'm married and living my own life but I'm really upset about him leaving. I just don't understand him. I think he's being selfish. He hasn't called any of us. He's forgotten he has children and grandchildren that love him. He doesn't care that we are floored by his actions. He doesn't want to own his responsibilities anymore. He doesn't want us in his life. It angers me. It hurts me. He's hurting my girls. They don't understand why he left. They don't understand why he doesn't want to see them anymore. They don't understand why he's living with another woman who is not their grandmother. I can't help them understand because I don't understand it either. The fact is, daddy's do walk out, husband's do walk away. We don't have to like it or understand it. We just have to learn to accept it. He doesn't want us to be his family anymore. He wants to start over. He wants to move on. He's walked away and left mom not sure of what to do. Broke, and soon to be homeless. She's legally blind and can't even drive. He's left his 3 grown children to pick up the pieces while he enjoys himself-carefree. He's patting himself on the back right now. I'd like to knock him over the head.