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its a good start but i feel like he deserves worse than that

Their mock election was so realistic the school even played the role of the CIA

your caption is doing numbers on copy-paste twitter

Oof

They stole my labor for profit. They did a capitalism to me on a communism meme. I can't decide if that's hilarious or infuriating.

My girlfriend is a construction worker (not even an electrician or w/e) and she wants me to stop sticking my tongue in electrical outlets.

My girlfriend is a doctor (not even a physical therapist or w/e) and she wants me to stop running full speed into brick walls to build up an immunity to broken bones.

timeline:

- Trump signs unpopular order banning TikTok for being Chinese

- Democrats support the ban because people are supporting a ceasefire on TikTok

- Netanyahu sides with Trump despite Biden’s ass kissing and collaborates with him to delay ceasefire talks

- Dems lose in a landslide because of their deeply unpopular positions

- Trump takes credit for the ceasefire and for TikTok getting unbanned

i’m dating an astrophysicist

i used to work for a nature center and we would constantly have wild owls come and call out to the owls in their cages and try to 1.) get them to follow them or 2.) they were looking for a mate

in the spirit of this post: when you live in areas with wild horses, the number one culprit for horse theft is actually other horses, because the young stallions that get chased out of the herd wanna start their own, and oh, look, look at all those cute mares in just,,,,a fenced off grassy area,,,how easy would it be to lure them over the fence,,,like some four-legged yodeling pied piper,,,

i think about this a lot

This is so cute wtf

Social animals will see another animal amd be like: Is anyone going to befriend this? And then not wait for an answer.

Humans are, delightfully, nowhere near the only ones who do this.

Many such cases

I love you, George Takei.

everybody is drooling for the blond guy from dungeon meshi. that guy is 100% real and I know like six of him, what you are looking for is a marine biologist

1. spends a long amount of time doing something weird far away from society

2. will not stop talking about their animal

3. has definitely eaten their animal and has strong opinions on how to cook it best

If you are into the sexy dwarf what you want is a mycologist btw

the white-green gradient of a freshly chopped spring onion…. c'est magnifique

isnt this beautiful

sorry i was struck by a vision

spring onion colour picked aromantic flag

official aromantic post

Beautiful Cinnamon Roll Too Good For This World, Too Pure

happy 10th birthday to beautiful cinnamon roll too good for this world, too pure

oh, humans. humans being human. i love you.

…Eek. 

Shoulda batted the crucible.

These guys are like the mythbusters, but without all that pesky science

The line up of fire extinguishers!

parallel play (liking and reblogging your mutual's posts but not talking to them)

Reblog this post to parallel play with prev

i should wake up and automatically be restored to full health, that's how sleeping should work, what is this horseshit

*waking up with a sore neck* where are my goddamn spell slots