IE 2016 CEU Session3

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Self-awareness and Self-management

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Plan for today
• Review
• Self-awareness
• Assessment and feedback practice
• Emotions – definition and glossary
• Managing self
• Embodiment
• Other techniques

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Activity in 4 groups (15 min)

• Take a list of paper


• Come up with 5 questions to review last
session
• Pass it on to another group
• Answer the questions
• Grade the questions/ correct the answers
if needed

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The EI Model
Me Others

Awareness Social
Self
awareness
Awareness
Behavior

Self Relationship
Management Management

Positive Influence
Self - awareness
• You know what you feel
• You notice how your emotions and
your actions can affect the people
around you
• You have a clear picture of your
strengths and weaknesses
• You able to differentiate
between facts, thoughts and
feelings
Johari window - background
• The Johari Window is a disclosure/feedback
model of awareness.
• Named after Joseph Luft and Harry Ingham.
• It was first used in an information session at
the Western Training Laboratory in Group
Development in 1955.

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Johari window
1 Public-area 2
Blind Area

Feedback
Known to all

Self-disclosure
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Hidden area Unkown to all

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OPEN
• The open area is that part of our conscious self -
our attitudes, behavior, motivation, values, way
of life - of which we are aware and which is
known to others. We move within this area with
freedom. We are "open books".
• It is through disclosure and feedback that our
open pane is expanded and that we gain access
to the potential within us represented by the
unknown pane.
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HIDDEN
• Our hidden area cannot be known to others
unless we disclose it.
• Possibly we freely keep within ourselves, or we
retain out of fear.
• The degree to which we share ourselves with
others (disclosure) is the degree to which we
can be known.
• Normally our intentions and values are hidden

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BLIND
• There are things about ourselves which we do
not know, but that others can see more clearly;
or things we imagine to be true of ourselves for
a variety of reasons but that others do not see
at all.
• When others say what they see (feedback), in a
supportive, responsible way, and we are able to
hear it; in that way we are able to test the
reality of who we are and are able to grow.
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UNKNOWN
• We are more rich and complex than that
which we and others know, but from time to
time something happens - is felt, read, heard,
dreamed - something from our unconscious
is revealed. Then we "know" what we have
never "known" before.
• An opportunity for grow

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Feedback process
• We always give feedback to each other.
• It can be just a look, one word or reaction to
what was done or said by another person.
• In other words, feedback is a reaction of the
external environment to what we are doing.
• This should be a motivation to develop!

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Feedback guidelines
• Start with some encouragement
• Be CONSTRUCTIVE rather than NEGATIVE
• Focus on FACTS not JUDGEMENTS
• Be SPECIFIC and use EXAMPLES
• Focus on VALUE TO RECEIVER not giver
• Share IDEAS, INFO and ALTERNATIVES not
solutions for the future

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Express feedback exercise
1. Person 1: I would like to
receive feedback on…
2. Person 2: Give feedback
using guidelines
3. Change roles when the
bell rings

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What are emotions?
1. What we feel (a label that we use to
describe a particular state)
2. How our bodies react (eg: racing heartbeat,
feeling tense)

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Do not mix with
• What we think (our interpretation of events
that produces a particular emotional
response or thought)
• How we behave ( eg: running away, hitting
out or hugging someone)

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4 categories of emotions
• Fear
• Anger
• Sadness
• Joy

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Self-management

•Physical
• Centering,
• Breathing,
• Voice
•Mental
• Naming the emotion
• Reconnecting with own goals
• Reflecting on a sequence feeling-thoughts-actions
• Reframing

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"There is nothing either
good or bad, but
thinking makes it so". –

Act II, Scene II HAMLET


W. Shakespeare
Questioning exercise in pairs
1) Remember an emotionally charged situation
2) Explore with your partner:
What happened?
What did you think about person/situation?
What emotions did you feel?
What did you do?
What were the consequences?
What was your desired outcome?
What were your goals with this person?
What would you need to do differently next time?
Principles of managing the emotions

• Responsibility for own emotions


• Accepting (non judgement) of own
emotions
• Goal-setting when managing the
emotions

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5-step approach of managing an emotion

1.Become aware of emotion


2.Understand own goals
3.Define the most effective emotional state
4.Choose the method to manage the emotion
5.And then act!

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Embodiment exercise – let’s practice

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Re-framing
• changing the conceptual
and/or emotional viewpoint
• a situation is experienced in
a different frame that fits
the "facts” but the meaning
is different

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What can you see?

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And now?

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Thank you!

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Next session

• Discovering your values and purpose


• Authentic Leadership

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Homework
1. Read the article on Authentic Leadership
2. Submit self-assessment if you have not done
so.

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