Di

rt
yConf
essi
ons
#1

Kennywal kedfrom herhousel atei

ntheev eni
ng
thensmiledasMot husiwal kedtil
lhestoodinfront
ofher.Hehuggedhert ightlyandkissedher.She
steppedbackshy lylookingdownf i
ddli
ngwi t
hher
fi
ngers.Hel ookedatherf aceundert hemoonl i
ght,
herbeautycoul dsti
llbeseen.I twasstil
lshocki
ng
thatshehadsai dyest ohimt houghhehadbegged
herformor ethantwoy ear s.Hehel dherhandthen
walkedwi t
hhert ohishouse.
Helookedatherwit
hasmi
l
e.“
Howwasy
our
gr
andmot hert
oday
?”
Sheshr
ugged.“
Luci
d.”
“
Tomor
rowt
her
esul
tsmaybeout
.”
“Iam soner
vousbutIknowwhatt
heyar
egoi
ngt
o
say.
”
“
Youmi
ghtsur
pri
sed.
”
Sheshookherhead.“
No.Idoubt
.Wi
thmy
grandmot her’ssi
cknessitwasreall
yhar dto
concentrate.Ont opofthatIam notreall
ythe
bri
ghtestst udentoutther
e.Iknowt hat.Ever
yone
knowst hat.”
“Youhavetostopbeingnegat
ive.
”Hestopped
walki
ng.“
Youar enotdumbandev eni
fyoufail
,you
canalwaysrewri
te.
”
“
Rewr
it
ewi
thwhatmoney
?”
“
Wewi
l
lwor
ryaboutt
hatwhenwegett
her
e.”
Theresolveinhisv
oicemadeKennynodt houghshe
knewther ewasnothi
nghecoul
ddo, hewasnot
evenwor kingandt
heli
tt
lemoneyhemadecoul d
neverbeenough.Shechangedthesubject
.“Howis
home? ”
“Sameol d.Iam st
il
lthebl
acksheepofthefamil
y
butthat
’snotwhatwear etal
kingabouttoday
.It
’s
yourbir
thday.Igotyouapresent
.”
Kennylookedathim exci
tedly.Shehadnev erhad
anyonegiftheronherbir
thday .Theycoul
donlysing.
Beforehergrandmother'
ssicknessgotwor se,she
wouldoccasional
lyeatacake.“ What?”
“
Come.
”
Hewal kedwithhertohishouse.Kenny’shear t
start
edpounding.Hisfamil
ydidn’
tlikeher,notev en
onebit.Hesnuckherinhisbackr oom.Kennyst ood
atthecornerofbedasMot husikneltanddr agged
somet hi
ngfrom under
neaththebed, hesmi led
handinghertheshoeshehadgot tenearli
er.
“
Isawt
hisatPep.Igott
hem f
ory
ou.
”
Kennysmil
edhappil
ystari
ngattheflatsandal
s, her
eyescat
chingt
hepricetag,P29.
95.Shet ookoffher
fl
ip-
fl
opsandwipedthedustoffherfeetwithher
handbefor
eputti
ngontheshoes.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Hesmi
ledt
henputhi
shandsonherwai
st.“
Youl
i
ke
t
hem?”
“
Ilov
ethem.Theyar
eni
ce.
”
Hepulledheronthebedthentheyl
aybesideeach
otherhol
dinghandswhil
eKennykickedofft
he
shoescareful
nottogethi
sbeddingdirt
y.Mothusi
broughtKenny’
shandtohisl
ipsandkissedi
t.
“Iappli
edforajobtoday
.Theyarelooki
ngforafuel
attandantatt
hefil
l
ingstat
ion.Hopef
ull
yIgeti
t.
”
Kennynoddedshy l
ysmil
ing.Shestil
ldi
dn’tfeel
that
muchconfidentwit
hhim andshewasj usttooshy.
Mothusil
ayonhissideandsmi ledstar
ingather.
Shyl
y,Kennysmiledav
oidinghiseyes.
Mot husimov edcl oserthent urnedherf aceand
ki
ssedher .Kennyki ssedhi m backkeepi ngher
handst oher self.Heki ssedherev enhar dergetti
ng
ont opofher , Kenny ’
sdr essr odeov erexposi ngher
panty .Herhear tpounded, ofcauseMot husiknew
shewasn’ tready ,shehadexpl ainedt ohi mthatshe
want edtowai tforal i
ttl
el onger.Inal lhonestlyshe
didn’twantt obecomet hatgi rlwhowasdumband
atthesamegetpr egnant .Everyoneexpect edhert o
getpr egnant.Buti nsuchmoment s,
shef oundit
hardt osaysomet hing.Het ookof fhi sFNBt -
shir
t
andki ssedherr unninghi shandsal loverherbody .
Mot husi
tookoffherdressthencuppedherbreast
rubbinghisboneronherbreathi
ngheav i
l
y.Hetook
outhisdicksli
dingherpant
iestothesidethen
rubbedhisdickonherwetpussygr unt
ing.
Kenny’sheartpoundedev
enmor
ethenshe
whispered.“
Mot husi
…”
Helookedatherbr
eat
hingheav
il
y.“
Justt
het
ipbabe.
Iwon’tputi
tal
li
n.”
“
Mot
husi
Idon’
twantt
ohav
eababy
.”
“Youwon’tgetpregnant.I
t’
snotl
i
kewewi l
lbe
havi
ngrealsex.Ijustwanttof
eelyou,
justthet
ip.
”
“
Mot
husi
…”
“
It
’snotreal
sexbabe.Nooneget
spr
egnantf
rom
t
hat,t
rustme.”
Heki ssedheragainrubbinghisdi
ckonhert henhe
hookedherpant ywithherthumbandt ookitoff
.He
openedherl egswiderstari
ngatherfatpussythen
partedherfoldsandlookedatherflapswhil
ehis
di
ckgotev enhar der
.Hepul l
edherclosert
hen
pressedattheent r
ance.

*
**
Atthemainhouse,Mothusi
’smothersatbesideher
husbandastheywatchedthenewsthenshel ooked
attheti
me.Mothusisti
ll
hadn’
ttakenhisfood.
“
Eish,
Mot
husi
isst
il
lnoty
etback.
”
Herhusbandl ookedather .“May behei sonhi sway
back.Idon’tunder standwhyy ouinvestyour selfso
muchont hatboy.Ihav egi
v enup.Iwi l
lnotwast e
myt imeonsomeonewhor efusest obeseriouswi th
l
ife.Wegav ehi m everythi
ngwecoul dpossiblygi v
e,
tookhi mtoexpensi veschool s,evensponsor edhis
re-wri
te.Twice!Hest i
ll
fail
edandhecont inuest ofail
.
Idon’tunderstandwher eIwentwr ongwitht hatboy ,
allhe’
sev erdonei sbeadi sgr ace.Ican’
tev enf ace
peoplebecauseofhi m.Hei spr obablystil
lrunni ng
afterthatwit
ch’sgr anddaught er.
”
“RragweMotheo,Mot husi
longbr okeupwiththat
gir
l.Andanythi
ngcouldhav ehappenedt ohi
m, i
t’
s
l
ate.Orhehasar r
ivedandhei sinhisroom af
raidto
comeaskf orhisf
oodbecausey ouneverfai
lto
makehi mfeelsmall.
”
Shest
oodupt
henwentt
otheki
tchenwher
eshe
t
ookhi
splat
efr
om themicrowav
eandwentwi
thi
t
t
othebackr
oom outsi
de.

*
**

Atthebackroom, Mot
husipushedharderather
entr
ance,theti
ppoppedri
ghtinthenhegroaned,her
ti
ghtnesssqueezi
nghim.
“
Mot
husi
!”Hi
smot
hercal
l
edout
side.
Hejumpedof fasthedooropenedt henhi smother
walkedin.Shelookedatthem droppi
ngt hepl
atein
completeshockwhi l
eKennyjumpedof fhisbed
pul
lingdownherdr ess,
herheartpoundingsomuch
i
tcouldjustrunoff.
“
Modi
mo!(
God!
)”
Mothusi
zippedhi
spant
sthenwal
kedputonhi
st-
shi
rt
.
“Whatisgoi
ngonher e?Kebonaengnehj
ehova?
(Whabam Iseei
ngJesus?)Mothusi
,i
nmyhouse?
Jehovafol
oga!(Jesuscomedown.)
”
“
MamaIcanexpl
ain.
”
“
Soyoubroughtt
hisst
upidgi
rlher
eagai
n?Di
dn’
t
y
ousayyoubrokeupwithher
?”
“
Ilov
eher
.”
“Youl ov
eher ?Youlov ethiswi t
chgir
l?Heywena
didn’tIt
elly outostayawayf rom myson? ”His
mot herwal kedfurt
heri nmov ingfrom thebedt hen
pickedashoeandt hrewi tatKennywhodi pped.She
pickedanot herandt hrewi tatKennywhogr abbed
Mot husihidingbehindhi m.Theshoel andedon
Mot husi’
schest .
“Isai
dstayawayfrom myson!
”Shewal kedover
thenMothusihel
dhismother
’shands.Kennyquickl
y
ranoutbaref
ootedandwentoutthr
ought hegat
e
goinghome.
Mot
husil
etgoofhi
smot herl
ooki
ngathert
ear
ful
l
y.
“
Whycan’
tyouunder
standthatIl
oveher
?”
“Under
standwhat?Mot husican’tyoudoonet hi
ng
ri
ght?Justonethi
ngisallIasky ou!Onething!I
neverwanttoseethatgirl
inmyy ardandifyoudon’t
wanttobreakupwithhert henleavemyy ard!Whil
e
atit
,goandfi
ndyoursel
fnewparent
s.Iam sosi
ck
andtir
edofdef
endingyouoverandoveragai
n
becauseyouj
ustcan’
tactri
ght.
”
Shewal
kedoutangr
il
ysl
ammi
ngt
hedoor
.

*
**

Kennyopenedt hegateatherhouset henwal ked

ri
ghtin.Shestoppedatt hedoort hentooka
momentbr eathi
ngheav il
ybeforeopeni ngthedoor
sl
owlyandwal krdinlockingbehindher .Shewalked
pasthergrandmother’sroom thenwentt ohers
whereshel ayonthesinglebed.Tear sfil
ledhereyes
andfellf
rom thecornerofherey es.
“Kenei
lwe!
”Hergrandmot hercall
edfrom herr
oom.
Kennygrabbedherdir
tytopt henwipedherfeetand
wenttothebedroom wherehergr andmotherwas
seatedonthebed.
“
Ma?
”
Hergr
andmot
herl
ookedatherwi
thaf
rown.“
Who
ar
eyou?
”
Kenny’sli
pstrembl edast
earsr
oll
eddownher
cheeks.“Kenny.It
’sKenny.
”Shewalkedov
ert
henl
ay
heront hebed.“Sleep.
”
“
Kenny
?Omangwena?(
Whoar
eyou?
)”
Kennyt
ookadeepbr
eat
hthenbr
okedowncr
ying.
“I
t’
sme.It
’sme.
”
Hergrandmotherlookedatherstil
lconfusedthen
Kennywalkedoutandl ayonherbedunabl etostop
hertear
s.Shepulledtheblanketoverherheadand
cri
edhersel
ftosleep.

*
**

Thefol
lowingmorni
ng,Kennyslowlyopenedher
eyesassomeoneknockedonherwi ndow.Shegot
upyawningthenopenedandlookedatMot husi
.She
openedthewindowwhilehesmiled.
“
Hey
…Ibr
oughty
ourshoes.
”
Hehandedt heplasticstar i
ngatherswol leney es.“I
am sorryabouty esterday .Iam t
hi nkingofmov i
ng
outifIgetthejob.Ican’ tkeepst ay i
ngathome.
Yesterdayshel ockedt hegat eaftery ouleft.Iam no
l
ongerachi ld.Iam goi ngt ostar
tl ookingf oraone
room theny ouandIwi ll
seeeachot herfreely.Idon’
t
wanttol oseyou.Ilov ey outoomuch. ”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
“
Kenny
?”Hergr
andmot
hercal
l
ed.
Shesmil
ed.“
Iwillseeyoulater.Iam goingtowash
MmagweMi ghty
’sclothestoday,hopefull
yher
housei
sdir
ty.El
ectri
cit
yisalmostf i
nished.”
Mothusi
smiledthenpul
ledherhandandkissedher
t
hroughthewindow.Hereleasedherl
i
pstakingout
aP10notefr
om hispocketandhandeditt
oher .
“
Takethatmoneyandbuyelect
ri
cit
y.Iwi
llseey
ou
l
ater
.Iam hel
pingmyf
atherwit
hhiscar.
”
“
Ican’
ttakey
our
-“
“Iam notaski
ngforper
missi
ont
ogiveitt
oyou.
”He
putiti
nherhand.“Goandbuyel
ect
ri
cit
y.”
Kennyst eppedbackandwavedwhil
ehewal ked
away .Shetookadeepbreat
hstari
ngatP10andput
i
tunder neathherpi
l
low.Wit
hasigh,sheputher
shoesdownt henwentt
ohergrandmother
’s
bedroom.
“
Ma…”
Hergr
andmotherl
ookedatKennysmi
l
ing.“
Kenny
,
cookmypor
ri
dgemydaught er
.”
Kennysmi
l
edback.“
Ok.
”

*
**

Laterthatday,
Tshenol
oincr
easedthev
olumeon
theradioastheNewsreaderspoke.
"
BotswanaExami nat
ioncounci
lrel
easesBot
swana
GeneralCert
if
icat
eForSecondar
yEducati
onresul
ts.
Atotalof36700candidat
eswrotethe-
"
Tshenol
oranov
ert
oherphone."
Kenny
!Di
dyouhear
that
?"
Kennyl
ookedatherf
ri
endunmov
ed."
Yes.
"
"
Dir
esul
tsdi
dul
e!(
Ther
esul
tsar
eout
.)Let
'scheck.
"
Tshenol
opressedherphoneshaki
ngthenwenton
thei
nter
netwitht
hebundlesshehadboughtear
li
er
on.Shescr
eamedst ar
ingatherr
esul
ts.
"
All
B's!UBweh!
"
Shej
umpedupanddownwi
thexci
tement
."Yes!
"
"
Checkmi
net
oo.
"
"
Okok.
."
Kennyl ookedatherwhi leshecheckedher s,her
heartpoundingbutsheknew.Shewasdumb, an
empt yvesselwheni tcamet oacademi cs.She
wasn'tev engoingtoholdherbr eat
hhopi ngf ora
miracle.HerEnglishteachersai dshebelievedi nher
butshehadcomet oanaccept ancethatother
peoplewer eacademi call
ygi f
tedwhileother swer e
not.Shewaspar toftheot herswhichwer enot .No
mat t
erhowmuchshet r
ied,itdidn'
tj
ustwor kforher.
Sheknewherf uturewasnotgoi ngouni versit
yl i
ke
otherkids.
"
Ahhf
ri
end.
..
"
KennylookedatTshenol
oandsi
ghedsadl
y."
Ifai
l
ed
ri
ght?Letmesee."
Kennyt
ookt
hephoneandl
ooked.

Engl
i
sh-A
Geogr
aphy
-C
Mat
hs-D
Busi
nessst
udi
es-C
Set
swana-D
Ar
t-C
Sci
enceDoubl
eAwar
d-EE

Tshenol
ohuggedhert
ight
ly!"
UBher
ewecome!
"
Conf
used,
Kennylookedatherresul
tsagai
nthen
st
art
edcount
ingherpoint
swithherhands.
"
8+6+5+6+5+6.
..
.36poi
nts?
"
Tshenol
onodded."
Wemadei
tfr
iend!
"
Tear
sfi
l
ledKenny
'sey
es."Iam goi
ngt
oUni
ver
sit
y?
Maybet
heymadeami st
ake."
"Fr
iend,y
ouworkedhardforthi
s!Yourmotheri
s
goingtobesoproud!Allt
hewit
chesthatsaidyou
wouldn'
tgotouniver
sit
yaregoingtodi
e."She
l
aughed.
Kennylookedatther
esult
sagai
nre-r
eadingin
di
sbeli
ef.Tshenol
ohuggedherasshestart
edtocr
y.
"
Ngng,don'
tcry.YoumadeitKenei
l
we.Weboth
madei
tfri
end!Theyar
egoingtoseeus.Wai
tand
wat
ch.
"
"
Ipassed?
"
"
Youdi
d!Youmadei
t!
"
Tshenol
o'
smotherwalkedi
nthehousethenKenny
qui
cklyst
oodupfr
om thecouchasthewoman
l
ookedatherwi
thafrown.
"
Nol
oweh,
whatdi
dIsayabouther
?"
"
Mama-
"
"Hey!Ar
eye!
"Shepoi
ntedatt
hedoor
.Kennyputon
herfl
ipf
lopsandwal
kedoutasherf
ri
endlookedat
herapol
ogeti
cal
ly
.
"Kantehowmanyt i
mesdoIhavetotal
kaboutt
his
Tshenolo?IsaidIdon'
twantt
hatwit
ch'
s
granddaughteri
nmyy ard!
"
"Mama, Kenny
'sgr
andmotherhasAl
zhei
mer
's
disease.Shei
snotawit
ch."
"
Sheisawit
chwhowonder
saroundnaked.Idon'
t
wantt
oseeyouwi
tht
hatgi
rlev
eragai
n!"
Tshenol
osi
ghed."
Resul
tsar
eout
."
Hermot
hersmi
l
ed."
Howdi
dyoudo?
"
"
Igotal
lB'
s!
"
"
That'
smygir
l.Ibett
hatgi
rlf
ailed.Atl
eastnowy
ou
wi
ll
beinGaborone,f
arawayfrom her.
"
"Kennyal
sopassed.Shei
sgoi
ngtoUBandsheis
goingtost
udyandbecomesomeonegr
eatert
han
mostpeople.
"
"Mxm,wit
hherstupi
dit
ysheisgoi
ngt
ogetpr
egnant
.
Iwonderhowsheevenpassed.
"
Tshenoloshookherheadandwalkedt
oher
bedroom wit
hherphonethencal
l
edhercombi
dri
ver
boyfri
end.
"
Babe.
..
"
"
Heyl
ove,
Ipassed!
"
"
Youpassed?
"
"
Yes.
"
"
Thi
sneedsacel
ebr
ati
on.Let
’sgooutt
oni
ght
."
Tshenol
osmi
l
ed."
Ok.
"
"
Iwi
l
lcomeandpi
cky
ouup.Sayar
ound6?
"
"
Ok.Canmyf
ri
endcome?
"
“
Yeahsur
e.”
Hehungupt al
kingtoacustomer.Tshenol
oputher
handsonherfacehappil
y.Shecouldalr
eadyseethe
ci
ty,sheputonhershoesthenwalkedout.
“
MamaIam goi
ngt
obuyai
rt
ime.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shewal
kedoutheadedt
oKenny
’shouse.
*
**

Kennywal
kedi
nsi
det
hei
ryar
dthengoti
nthehouse.
"
Nkunku?
"
Shesearchedaroundt hehouset henwal kedout
worri
edlynotf
indinghergrandmot her.Shewalked
outofthegateknowi ngwherev ershewas, shewas
paradi
ngnaked.Shepausedst aringather
grandmotherwalkingoverholdingf i
rewood.
"
Nkuku,
Isai
dIwoul
ddoi
twhenIcomeback.
"
"
Iwasf
eel
i
ngbet
tersoIdi
dit
.Don'
twor
ry.
"
"MmagweMi ght
ydidn'
tpayme.Iwi
l
lgoandbuy
elect
ri
cit
ywi
ththeP10Ihave.
"
Kennyt
ookthefi
rewoodfrom herthenwalkedback
i
nsidet
heyardandputthewooddown.Shewal ked
i
nsidet
hehousewithhergrandmotherandsmiled.
Shewasluci
denoughtoreceivethenews.
"
Ther
esul
tscameout
.Ipassed.
"
"
Youpassedngwanake?
"
"
Eemma.
"
"
Godi
sfai
thf
ul!Youar
egoi
ngt
oUni
ver
sit
y."
"Idon'
twanttol
eav
eyoual
one.Whoi
sgoi
ngt
otake
careofyou?"
"
Iwi
l
ltakecar
eofmy
sel
f.
"
"
Youaresick.Youcan'
ttakecareofyour
sel
f.Idon'
t
wantany
onet aki
ngadvantageofyou.
"
"Kenei
lwe,
ifyoust
ayherewit
hme,what
'sgoi
ngt o
happentoyouortome?Youneedtogotoschool
andtakecareofme.Youcan'
tdot
hati
fyoudon'tgo
toschoolmybaby.
"
Kennyl
ookedatTshenol
owhohadj
ustwal
kedi
n.
“
Dumel
ang.
.”Shegr
eet
edr
espect
ful
l
y.
“
Mychi
l
d,howar
eyou?
”
“
Iam f
ine.
”
Kennywal
kedoutwi
thTshenol
o.“
Hey
…”
Tshenol
osmi
l
ed.“
Toni
ghtwear
egoi
ngout
!Wear
e
goi
ngt
ocel
ebr
ate!
”
“
Nol
oweh,
youknowIcan’
t-
“
“
Youarecomingwith.That’
sit!Youar
egoi
ngt
o
l
oosenuptoni
ghtandhav efun.”
.
.
.
Don'tf
orgettol
eaveali
keandacomment
si
lentr
eaders,i
t'
syourt
urnt
oshi
newit
hother
s
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#2

Laterthatday ,Kennyputonhernewsandal swith

herjeansandat -shi
rt
.Hershor tkinkyhaircombed
nicel
y.Shel ookedather sel
ff oramoment
wonder i
ngifi twasar eall
ygoodi deatoleav eher
grandmot heraloneev enifitwasj ustgoingt obefor
anhourbutt henshehadpr omisedTshenol o.She
appli
edVasel i
netoherl i
pst henwal kedoutofher
room.Hergr andmotherlookedupf r
om herbi bl
e.
“Iam goi
ngt
oappl
yforpar
tti
mej
obsatNol
o’s
housemmama.”
Hergr
andmot
hersmi
l
ed.“
Ok,
comebackqui
ckl
y.
”
“
Eemma, Iwi
llbebackinhourort
wo.Iam goi
ngto
l
ockthedoori
ncasey oufor
getyour
sel
fthenyou
won’
tgetoutofthehouse.
”
Hergr
andmot
hersmi
l
ed.“
Ok.
”
Kennywal
kedoutl
ocki
ngbehi
ndhert
henwal
ked
outoft
hegateasi
tbecamedar
kwhil
eput
ti
ngthe
keyinherpocket.Thabo’
scombist
oppedbesideher
thenshegotinatthebackasTshenol
olookedat
herwit
hasmi le.
“Youl
ookni
cefri
endbutIcoul
dhav
ebor
rowedy
ou
oneofmydr
esses.
”
KennylookedatTshenol
oandshr
ugged.“
Letusj
ust
go,HiThabo.”
“
HiKenny
.”
Thabodrov eoffasKennysighed,shehadn’ttol
d
Mothusiaboutit.Hedidn’
tex actl
yli
keTshenoloand
notthatTshenololi
kedhimt oo.Shesighedleani
ng
backont heseat.Awhil
elaterheparkedi nf
rontofa
cl
ub.Kennyl ookedatTshenoloinshockwhi l
e
Thabogotout .
“
Nol
o,y
oudi
dn’
tsaywewer
ecomi
ngt
oacl
ub.
”
“Kennycal
m down.Wher
edopeopl
ehav
efun
expectf
orclubs?
”
“Isti
ll
hav
etogobackhome,
mygr
andmot
heri
s
alone.
”
“
Youwi
l
lgoback,
youar
epani
cki
ngf
ornor
eason.
Bat
hongKeneil
we!Can’
tyoujustl
oosenup?Doy ou
al
wayshavetobeupti
ght?Kanasomet i
meswabora
hel
aahh!(
Somet i
mesyouarejustbor
ingahh!
)”
Kennysi
ghed.“
Youdon’
tunder
standmysi
tuat
ion.
”
“OfcauseIdon’
tKenei
l
we.Yourgr
andmot
heri
sfi
ne.
Canwej ustgoi
n?”
Kennysi ghedthenfol
lowedTshenolowhowasi na
shortblackdressinsi
detheclub.Thabowal kedov
er
tothem hol di
ngdri
nksthenhandedt hem eacha
disposalcup.Kennylookedatherdrinkwhile
Tshenolot ookasip.Wit
htheclubfullypackedshe
couldn’
tseeany thi
ng.Shebroughtthedrinktoher
mout handpaused.Thabosmi l
edather.
“
Ohhsorr
y,y
oudon’
tdr
inkal
cohol
.Iwi
l
lgety
ou
j
uice.
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Thanky
ou.
”
Thabotookhercupthendisappearedinthecr
owd.
TheDJplayedanothersongthenev er
yone
scr
eamed.Tshenolodancedget t
inginthecr
owd
si
ngingal
ongwitheveryoneelse.
Hehbar
esi
dl’
ubushabet
hu
Hehbar
esi
dl’
ubushabet
hu
Hehbar
esi
dl’
ubushabet
hu
Hehbar
esi
dl’
ubushabet
hu
Hohsphet
hel
abant
wanai
nthemeant
ime
Hi
bir
i

Kennysighedthensteppedbackandst oodata
cornerwatchi
ngfrom adistancef
eel
ingoutofplace
whileever
yonesangloudly.Thabowalkedbackwith
herjui
ceinadisposablecup.
“
Igoty
out
his.
”
“
Oh.
.thanky
ou.
”
Hestoodbesideher
.“Ihear
dyoupassedt
oo.
Congrat
ulat
ions.
”
Kennyt
ookasi
pofherdr
inkwi
thasmi
l
e.“
Thank
you.
”
“
Sowhatar
eyougoi
ngt
ost
udy
?”
“
Iam notsur
e.Idi
dn’
tthi
nkIwoul
dpass.
”
“
Nowy
ouhav
eanoppor
tuni
ty.
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Wheny
ouar
eready
,Iwi
l
ldr
opy
ouof
f.
”
“
Thanky
ousomuch.
”
“
It
’sal
lgood.
”
Hewat
chedherdr
inkst
eadi
l
ylooki
ngar
oundl
ost
.

*
**

Mot husistar
tedhisfat
her’
scarthensmil
ed,he
reversedthensteppedonthebreaks.Hestepped
outoft hecarthenwalkedinsi
dethehousewhere
hisfatherwas.
“
Thecari
ssor
ted.
”
Hi
smotherl
ookedathi
m andsmi
l
ed.“
Okmyboy
.
Goandf
reshenup.
”
Hisf at
herl ookedawayashel ookedathi m, he
shookhi sheadandwal kedout.Mot husihurri
ed
backt ohi sbackroom wherehef reshenedup
quicklyt henwalkedoutgoingtoKenny ’
shousein
thedar k.Hehadn’ tgot
tentheoppor tuni
tytoseeher
duringt heday .Hepausedthenwal kedbacki nsi
de
they ardandwentt ohi
smot her’
sgar denwher ehe
tookaf ewr osesandrushedoutwi ththem befor
ehe
couldbeseen.
Minut
esl
aterhesi
ghedst
andingatthei
rusual
spot
knowi
ngshewouldbeoutanymoment .Hesat
downontherockwai
ti
ngwhil
estari
ngatthedark.
Hisphonerangfr
om hispocket
.Het
ooki
toutand
answeredhisbr
other
’scal
l.
“
Soy
ouf
uckgi
rl
sinpeopl
e’
shousesnow?
”
Mot
husi
laughed.“
Yourmot
herr
uinedt
hemoment
.”
“Gor
enkebeoj
elesengweny
ana?(
Woul
dyouhav
e
smashed?
)”
“
Kenekeset
sekel
emot
heng.(
Iwasal
ready
i
nsi
de.
)”
“
Nextti
melockthedoor.Osekawai
misangwanao
mongwe.(
Don’ti
mpregnateher
.)
”
“
Iwon’
t.
”
“Good,gapeyoudon’tknowwhatshehasi nher
blood.Youdon’twanttobei nasi
tuati
onwhereyou
aretaki
ngpil
ls.Somepeopl earebornwit
hitand
withthewaythatli
tt
lethingisshy,
Idoubtshewil
l
eventelly
ousobecar eful.
”
“Kennywouldneverletmesmashwhensheknows
herstat
us.Youdon’tknowherenough.Shei
san
angel.
”
“
Ok,
ify
ousayso.Sowhatwer
eyousay
ing?
”
“Iam goi
ngf
oranint
erv
iew,att
hefi
ll
i
ngstat
ion.I
don’
thaveanyf
ormalcl
othesnoraCV.”
“
Iwi
l
lsendy
ousomet
hing.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“Don’tgoandgivethemoneytoKennyorbuyher
thi
ngs.Iknowy ouwanttospoi
lhersobadbutthat
’s
thething,youhav
et ogetaj
obtospoil
her
endlessly
.”
“Iknow.IhopeIgeti
t.Ial
sowanttomoveout.I
can’tkeepstayi
ngwi
thbomama, sheat
tacked
Kennyy est
erday.
”
“
Nowy
ouar
etal
ki
ng.Hopef
ull
yyougett
hej
ob.
”
“
Yah…t
hanks.
”
“
Shar
p.”
Motheohungup, Mot husi
lookedaroundnotseei
ng
heranywherethensi ghedwaiti
ng,someti
messhe
tooklonger
,especiall
ywhenhergr andmother’
s
conditi
onwasactingupbutev ent
uall
yshewould
come.Hest ar
tedpl ayingagameonhi sphone
waiti
ng.

*
**

Attheclub,anhourl
ater,ThabohandedKennyy et
anothercupofjui
cewhi l
eTshenolodr ankblack
l
abel.ThabolookedatTshenoloalldrunkt hen
walkedawayassomeonecal l
edhimi nt hecrowd.
Beingacombi dri
ver
,itseemedev ery
oneknewhi m.
Kennyqui
ckl
ypul
l
edTshenol
ocl
oser
.
“Nol
o,Ithi
nky
ouhav
ehadenough.Youshoul
dsl
ow
down.”
“
Eishwabor
aKenny
!”
“
Youar
edr
unk.Weshoul
dgetgoi
ng.
”
“Iam notgoingany
wher e!
”Shescreamedmov i
ng
back.“YouaresoboringKenny!Kooreyouactli
ke
anoldwomanandmay bespendingsomucht i
me
withyourgrandmotheri
sthereasonwhy .
”
“
Noloweshouldgo.Yourmot
heri
spr
obabl
y
wonder
ingwhereyouare.
”
“Idon’tcar
e!Youaresuchapar typooperKenny!
Youar esoboringandy ousuckt heli
feoutoffun
wantingtobeaper f
ectper son.Youarenotperfect
.
Lesagombor amanh!(Stopbor i
ngme. )Gobea
bori
ngper sonwithyourgrandmot herfarawayfr
om
me.”
Kennyl
ookedaroundaspeoplestar
ed.Shekept
qui
etasTshenol
olookedather.
“
Youar
enotper
fect
,youhav
eadement
ed
grandmot
herwhowalksar
oundnaked.Lesagor
e
tenamanh!*St
opannoyi
ngus!
)Yeerrr
r!
”
Tearsf
il
ledKenny
’seyest
hensheputthej
uicedown
andwalkedawaywhil
eTshenol
oscreamedbehind
her.
“Youarecr azy!Youandyourgrandmother!She
probablyget srapedwhenshewondersof fnaked.
Youwal kar oundpret
endi
ngtobeperfect,li
keyour
l
ifeisfull
ofchocol at
esandroseswhil
ey our
grandmot herisadementedwoman! ”
Kennyfinallysteppedout ,
shet ri
edtocontrolher
tear
sbutt heyst i
l
l f
il
ledherey es.Sheknewi twas
probablytheal cohol tal
ki
ngbutt hewor dsstil
lcut
deep.At earrolleddownhercheekt henshewi pedit
offasanot herr ol
leddownt heothercheek.Shet r
ied
pull
ingherselft ogetherbutt hemoreshet r
ied,the
mor eshet earedup.I twasasi ft
hef l
oodgateshad
beenopened.
Thabowal
kedoutt
henl
ookedatKenny
.“Hey
,ar
e
youok?
”
Kennywi
pedhert
ear
swi
thherf
orear
m sni
ff
ingt
hen
hehuggedher
.
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
Kennyst
eppedback.“
It
’sok.
”
“
Her
e,hav
esomewat
er.
”
Kennytookt
heopenedwat
eranddr
ankhal
fbef
ore
gi
vingbackt
hebott
le.
“
Youwi
l
lfeel
bet
terj
ustnow.Iam sor
ryaboutt
hat
.”
“
Pleaset
akemehome.
”
“
Ok.Iwil
ldr
opy
ouof
ffi
rstt
hencomebackf
or
Nol
o.”
Kennypausedf
eelingawaveofmi
l
ddi
zzi
ness.
Al
armed,Thabolookedather
.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
“
Yes…j
ust
…di
zzy
.”
“
Dri
nkmor
ewat
er.
”
Hegaveherthebottl
eagai
nandhelpedherdri
nk.
Kennyswal
lowedthenbli
nkedacoupleofti
mes
whil
ehervi
sionbecameblurr
ed.Sherubbedher
ey
estry
ingtoseeproper
lybutshegotev
enmor
e
di
zzyasherbodybegungett
ingweak.
“
I…”
“
Comeandseati
ncar
.”
Thabohelpedhertohiscombi.Kennygrabbedhi
st-
shi
rttr
yingtowalkproper
lyget
ti
ngmor eweakthen
fi
nal
lyclosedhereyesunabl
etofightof
fthefog
anymore.
“
Kenny
!Kenny
!”
Thabopi
ckedherupthenputheri
nhiscombi
.A
manwalkedovert
henlookedatThabo.
“
Wher
ear
eyout
aki
ngher
?”
“
Home.
”
“
Whoar
eyout
oher
?Isawwhaty
oudi
d.”
“
Iam hersi
ster
…herbr
other
.”
“
Iam cal
l
ingt
hepol
i
cet
hen.
”
“
BecauseIam t
aki
ngmydr
unksi
sterhome?
”
“
Otl
any
elat
lhemonna,
Isawwhaty
oudi
d,oseka
wabat
lagont
ir
asehema.(
Don’
tyoudar
emakeme
af
ool.
)”
“
Watar
eyougoi
ngt
odot
omet
hen?
”
Themanl ookedathi
mthenchuckledtur
ning.He
tur
nedbackandpunchedThabosohar dthatblood
spurtoutf
rom hi
snose,
thebl
owt akinghi
m strai
ght
tothepavement.
“Otl
any el
aomaret
e.”Themanpull
edKennyfrom
thecarandthr
ewheroverhi
sshoul
dert
henlooked
atThabowhowasstil
lstr
uggl
ingt
ogetup.
“
Iam AronaMotsumi,
goandtel
lwhoev
ery
ouwant
t
otel
lthatIt
ookher.Omae!
”
Thabowat chedhim ashecar r
iedunconscious
Kennyt oablackMBW whi lehi
snosebl ed.Heput
heratthebackt henjumpedinanddr oveoff.
TshenolostaggeredoutthenlookedatThabo’snose
whiletheBMW’ Stail
light
sdisappear
edi nthe
darkness.
“
What
…wher
e’sKenny
?”
“
Shel
eftwi
thamanwhoj
ustpunchedmewhenI
tr
iedst
oppi
ngt
hem.Younev
ert
oldmeKennywas
dati
ng.
”

*
**

Mothusil
ookedatthetimethensighed.Itwasnow
morethantwohoursofwai t
ing.Hegotupand
wal
kedtoherhouse,theli
ghtsoutsidewereoff
t
houghinsidet
heywer eon,thedoorslookedl
ocked.
Hejumpedi nt
hroughthefencegoingtoherwindow
t
henknocked.

*
**

Meanwhil
e, t
henei ghborwalkedoutofthehouse
smokingthenf rownedstari
ngatthehumanf i
gureat
mmagweKef il
we’shouse.Hewat chedfora
momentr eal
izingitwasprobablyathi
ef,theold
womanandhi sgrandchil
dcouldn’
tpossiblydefend
themsel
ves.Hewentbacki nthehouseandcame
backwit
hhiswhist
let
henl
ethi
strai
nedbul
l
dogs
fr
eeblowi
ngthr
oughthewhi
stl
e.
“
Legodu!Legodi
!(Thi
ef!Thi
ef!
)”
Panicki
ng,Mot husi startedrunni
ngt owardst he
fencetojumpov er.Thenei ghbor’
st r
aineddogs
j
umpedov erthef encesget ti
nginmmagwe
Kefil
we’syardwhi lejumpedoutoft hey ardgoing
home.Thedogsbar kedgoi ngaf t
erhim whi l
ethe
communi tynightwat cher’
scameoutr unningwith
thei
rowndogshol dingbi gsti
cks.Withhisf l
ubby
tummyj i
ngli
ngl ikelosemeat ,t
henei ghborran
towardshisgat eandj oi
nedchasi ngafterthethi
ef.
.
.
.
Leav
eal
i
keandacomment
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#3

Mot husi l
ookedbehi ndthenranev enfasterasdogs
andpeopl ecameaf t
erhim.Hej umpedi ntoayard
goingt othebacky ardt
henjumpedt houghthefence
toot heryard,hi
shear tpoundingsomuch,
adrenalinesohi gh.Hejumpedoutandj oinedthe
backst reet,hecouldstil
lhearthedogsf rom a
distantbuther anev enmor edisappeari
ngi nt
he
darkness.

*
**

Thef ol
lowingmorning,Tshenoloopenedherey es
andtouchedherachi ngheadwi thaf rown.Shesat
upri
ghtandf rownedatthepai n.Itf
eltasif
somet hinghadbeenf or
cedinherasscr ack.She
l
ookedatThabowhowasdr essingupt henlooked
aroundt hehouse,i
tdidn’
tlooklikehishousebut
t
her
ewer
epi
ctur
esofki
ds.
“
Ihav
etogo.Let
’sgo.
”
Shesteppeddownt henfr
ownedst
ari
ngather
nakedness,shecoul
dn’tr
emembermuchexpectst
il
l
bei
ngatt heclub.
“
Iwantt
opee.
”
“
Bef
astTshenol
o.Ihav
etogot
owor
k.”
Tshenol owalkedtot hebat hroom andt ri
edpeei ng
butitwaspai nful,
shef li
nchedhert earfull
yast he
peebur nther.Sheclosedherey est ryingtor ecal l
whathappenedt ohert hepr eviousni ghtbutshe
couldn’tremembermuch, allsher emember edwas
beingatt heclub.Shegr untedr egret t
abl yasshe
thoughtofKennyandt hehor ri
blet hingsshehad
said.Careful
ly,shepeedsl owl ythenwi pedher self
withthet i
ssueandl ookedati t
, t
hebl oodst ains
catchingherat t
enti
ont henshef lushedi tandsl owl y
walking.
“
Thabo,
wher
eisKenny
?”
“
Itol
dyouaker
e,shel
eftwi
thsomeguy
.”
“
Someguy
?Whatguy
?Mot
husi
?”
“
Who’
sMot
husi
?”
“
Herboy
fri
end.
”
“
Idon’
tknowbutt
heguywasdr
ivi
ngaBMW.
”
Tshenol
o’shear
tski
pped.“
Dri
vi
ngawhat
?”
“
ABMW, cany ouputony ourcl
othes?Iwantt
ogot
o
wor
k,Iam l
ate.Wantia.(
Youaredel ay
ingme.
)”
Tshenol
opi
ckedherdr
essf
rom t
hef
loorandputi
t
on.
“Whydidyoul
ethi
mtakeher
?Kennydoesn’
tknow
anyonewhodri
vesaBMW.”
“Shelef
twit
hhi
m wi
l
li
ngl
y.Hesai
dhi
snamei
s
AronaMotsumi
.”
Tearsfi
ll
edTshenolo’ey
es.“Howcouldyouleta
str
angertakeher?Whatifhewenttohaveher
murderedorsomething?Whathetookherandkil
led
herforari
tual
.”
“
Howwoul
dIhav
eknown?
”
“
Howwoul
dyouhav
eknown?Shecamewi
thusand
-
“
Acardrov
ei nout
sidet
hent
hecardoor
scl
osed
secondsl
ater.
“
Shi
t!Mywi
fei
sher
e!”
“
Yourwhat
?”
“
Mywi
fei
sher
e!Youneedt
ohi
de.
”
Heopenedthewar
drobeandpushedheri
nsi
de
f
orcef
ull
y.
“
Thabowhatar
eyout
alki
ngabout
?”
“
Mywi
feandki
dsar
eher
e.Theycan’
tseey
ou.
”
Hepi ckedherpant yandshoest hent hr
ewt hem at
herinsi det hewar drobe.Tshenolo’
sphonemade
noi
cei ndicatingbat t
erylow,hepickeditupand
thr
ewi tatherhi tti
ngherf orehead.Heclosedthe
wardr obet henl ockedwhi l
eTshenol orubbedher
pai
nf ul forehead.
“
What
’ssmel
l
ingi
nher
e?”Af
emal
evoi
ceasked.
“
What
’ssmel
l
ing?Ican’
tsmel
lany
thi
ng.
”
“
NgngThabo,
Icansmel
lsomet
hingher
e.Whenl
ast
didyoucl
eant
hisr
oom?It’
sstuf
fy.Ihavebeengone
foronl
yaweekandal
readyi
tsmellsli
kethi
s?”
“
Ihav
ebeenbusy
.”
“
Itsmel
l
sli
kesex.
”
Thabol
aughed.“
Comeon.
”
“
No,
Icansmel
lsomet
hingi
nher
e.”
“
Youar
eexagger
ati
ng.Imi
ssedy
ou.
”
“
Heel
aThabo,Iknowhowsexsmel
l
sandt
hisr
oom,
t
hisr
oom smel
lsli
kesex.
”
“
Babeweh,
comeon,
arey
ouser
iousr
ightnow?
”
“Thabo!Thi
sr oom enkgamorobal
o!(Thi
sroom
smellssex.
)Iam notcrazy
.Youhavestar
tedaker
e?
Youhav est
arted!
”
“Babycomeon,Iloveyou.Gapehelawhywoul
dI
havesexinourhouse?YouthinkIwoul
ddo
something;
l
iktt
hat?”
“
Eh!Youwoul
dThabo.Idon’
ttr
usty
ou!
”
“
Keataret
si,
babecomeon.YouandIarepastthi
s.I
missedyou,youj
ustcan’
tcomewi
thaccusat
ions.
Comeon.
.”
Tshenol
oclosedhereyesastear
sr ol
l
eddownher
cheekswhil
eshesatinthewardr
obel i
steni
ngtothe
conver
sati
on.Shecouldonl
yimaginewher eKenny
wasorwhathermot herwasthi
nki
ng.

*
**

Kennylookedaroundthestr
angeroom, thel
ast
thingshecoul
dr ememberwasdr i
nkingthewater
from Thabo.A manwalkedinthenlookedather.
“
Oh…y
ouar
eawake.
”
Kennyl
ookedathi
mfear
ful
l
y.“
Whoar
eyou?
”
“
Howst
upi
dar
eyou?
”
“
Rra?
”
“
Youhear
dme.Howol
dar
eyou?
”
“
19.
”
“
Soy
ouj
ustgetwat
erf
rom st
ranger
satcl
ubs?
”
Kennykeptqui
ettr
yingtof
igur
eouti fshehadbeen
ki
dnappedandraped.Shecouldn’
treall
yfeel
anyt
hingormaybeshehadt ocheckifsomething
hadactual
l
yhappened.
“Youweregoi
ngtobeanotherr
apecase.Ihav
e
neverseenadumbgi
rll
ikeyou.
”
“
Whoar
eyou?
”
“
Mxm…”
Themant ookof fhist-
shir
tthenwal kedtothe
ensuit
eclosi
ngt hedoorbehindhi m.Kennypi cked
hershoesthenwal kedoutofthebedr oom, herheart
poundingsomuch.Shewal kedoutoft hehouse
holdi
nghershoest oherchestt henlookedatt he
elect
ri
cgateclosedandwal kedbacki nsidethe
house.Shelookedar oundsearchingforthegat e
remote.Tearsfi
ll
edherey esthensheputonher
shoesandpul l
eddownherj eansandpant i
est o
checkhersel
f.
Themanwal kedoutfrom t
hebedroom wi
thatowel
aroundhiswaist.Kennyquickl
ypul
ledupherpant
s.
Hel aughedshakinghi
shead.
“
Yout
hinkIr
apedy
ou?
”
Shequi etl
ylookedathimt henhesmi l
ed.“Idi
dn’
t
touchy ou,i
fIdid,youwouldn’tneedtocheckand
youwon’ tbewal ki
ng.It
ooky ouf r
om aguywhowas
probablygoingtorapeyoual lbecauseyouaretoo
trust
ing.Gomokebomat la.Youcan’tbethat
stupi
d.”
“
Thaboi
smyf
ri
end’
sboy
fri
end.
”
“So?Hecan’tr
apey
oubecausehei
syourf
ri
end’
s
boyfr
iend?
”
Kennylookedathim.“
Iwantt
ogohome.My
grandmotheri
salone.
”
Hewal kedbackinsi
dehisroom.Kennyrubbedoff
hertearsi
tt
ingdown, Mothusihadpr
obablywait
ed
forher.Awhil
elaterhewalkedoutal
ldressed.
“
Let
’sgo.
”
Shestoodupandwalkedoutf
ir
st.Heunl
ockedhis
BMW andgotinwhi
leKennyhesit
ant
lygoti
natthe
back.
“
Comeatt
hef
ront
.”
Shegotoutt
hengoti
natt
hefr
ont
.Hest
art
edt
he
caranddr
oveoutoft
hel
odge.
“
What
’sy
ourname?
”
“
Kenny
.”
“
Kenny
?”
“
Kenei
l
weLaol
ang.
”
“
Iam Ar
ona.Kengol
esemat
lany
anay
aana?
”
“
Iam notst
upi
d.”
“Yesy
ouar
e.Ihavenev
ermetany
onel
i
keyou.Why
doyougot
oclubswhenyouar
eadumbrur
algi
rl
?”
“
Iam nota…“Shekeptqui
et.
“
Youcan’
ttal
know?
”
Shelookedathim.“Iam notstupi
d.Idon’tgot
o
cl
ubs,itwasmyf i
rstti
meandnooneev erwarned
meaboutwhathappenst her
e.Stopcall
i
ngme
st
upid,it
’sr
ude.Youdon’tknowme. ”
Aronachuckled.“
Butyouarestupi
d,y
oucan’tbe
uglyandstupidatthesameti
me.Atleastbeone
thi
ng.”
“
Youar
erude.
”
“Iam st
ati
ngfact
s.Andwhowear
st-shi
rty
a
Botswanapowercorpor
ati
ont
oaclub?”
Kennyl
ookedatherwhi
tet
-shi
rt
.“Thi
st-
shi
rti
sni
ce.
Il
ikei
t.
”
“Mmeemaswekana,gapei
tlookstoobi
gfory
ou.O
kar
eol
atl
egi
l
ehela.Keamasalela?
”
Kennyfol
dedherar
msandl
ookedoutt
hrought
he
window.
“
Soy
ouwon’
ttel
lmewher
eyouar
egoi
ng?
”
Annoyed,
shest
arteddi
rect
inghi
m.Awhilel
ater
Aronapar
kedi
nfrontofhergat
ethenl
ookedather
.
“
Youst
ayher
e?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Ok,
youcango,
Kennyt
hest
upi
dgi
rl
.”
“Iam notst
upid,andIli
kemyt
-shi
rtandIknowIam
beauti
ful
.Imightnotlookl
i
keamodel butIam
beauti
ful
.”
“
Whol
i
edt
oyou?
”
Kennysteppedoutofthecarandangril
ymarched
i
nsideheryardwhil
eAronadroveoff.Sheunl
ocked
thedoorandwalkedinwit
hasi gh.
Shewalkedtohergrandmot her
’sbedroom and
l
ookedatherstil
lsl
eeping.Shehurri
edt oherr
oom
thenchangedbefor
egoi ngbacktoher
grandmother
’sr
oom.
“
Mmama…”
Kennyfr
ownedst ari
ngathergrandmothert
heshook
hercal
l
ingforherloudersev
eralbutshewouldn’
t
wakeup.Sheputherhandov ernecktofeelher
pul
se.

*
**

Aronasigheddri
vi
ng,hi
sphoner
ang.Hel
ookedat
thecal
lerIDthenanswer
ed.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Mist
er,
gatwewhathappened?Thepol
i
cear
e
l
ooki
ngforyou.
”
“
It
’snot
hing.
”
“
Aronaweh,i
t’
ssomet
hingwhent
hepol
i
cear
e
l
ooki
ngfory
ou.”
“
Lesangwancheat
er.
”
“
Eish…”
Aronashookhi
shead.“Iwantedtomar
ryher.The
painful
par
tist
hatshecheatsonmewithmyboss.
Outofanyoneshecanevercheatonmewith,she
decidesmyboss.
”
“
Whatdi
dyout
othem t
hen?
”
“Icr
ushedintothei
rcarwithJomo’st
ruck.Noone
gothurtbutDaniel
justwantstomakesurehedrai
ns
mewhat everIhavebecausehefi
redme.”
“Youaregoi
ngt
opayf
ort
hedamagest
ohi
scar
kana.
”
“Yah…Iam sostressed,Iam st
il
lpayi
ngfortheloan
Itookbuyi
ngherthatcar.Igaveherever
ythi
ng,Idid
every
thi
ngIcoulddo, andtothi
nksheloves
expensi
vethi
ngs…”
“
Wher
ear
eyour
ightnow?
”
“
Iwentt
oShakawe.
”
“
Shakawe?
”
“Yeah.IwasatMaunbutthencamethi
ssi
def
or
somef reshai
r.IwasatMJ’
shouse.
”
“
Youneedtocomeback.Wewilldealwi
thi
t
t
oget
her.Hopef
ull
ynomoreLesang.”
Aronacaughtsightoft
heshinyearr
ingsonthe
dashboardrecal
li
nghehadt akent
hem offKenny
l
astnightandputthem ther
e.Hetookau-tur
ngoing
back.
“
Iwi
l
lcal
lyoul
ater
.”
“
Sur
e,j
ustcomeback.
”
Hedrovebackthenparkedatt
hegate.Hefr
owned
asKennyranoutofthehousethenst
eppedout
.
“
Mygrandmotherwon’
twakeup,
pleaset
akehert
o
t
hehospi
tal
.”
Hewal kedwit
hherbackt ot
hehousethenpi
cked
hergrandmotherandwalkedbackwit
hhertothecar
.
Kennyopenedt hedoorf
orhimthenAronapl
aced
heratthebackandclosedthedoor
.
Kennyl
ookedatMothusi
whowaswal
ki
ngov
er
whil
eAronagoti
nthecar.
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Shewon’
twakeup.Iam t
aki
nghert
othehospi
tal
.”
Shegoti
natthefr
ontthenthecardr
oveof
f.
Mothusi
stoodt
hereconfused.

*
**

AtThabo’ shouse,Tshenol
opushedt heshoest he
othersidethensatwi t
honebut tsweat inginsidethe
war dr
obe.Thabohadsi nceleftandhi swi fewasst i
l
l
i
nt hehouse, shecouldhearherwalkingar ound.I
f
thewi f
efoundhershecoul dgetsued, shewasnot
will
ingtotaket heri
skofgetti
ngbeat en, getti
ng
suedt henseeingherfaceinTheVoi ceNewspaper
soshesatsi lentl
ywhil
esweatr andownher
forehead.

*
**
Att
hehospi
tal
,Kennystoodwit
hhergr
andmot
her
whi
let
hedoctorat
tendedher
.
“
What
’swr
ongwi
thher
?”
“
It
’sherbl
oodpr
essur
e.I
sshet
aki
ngherpi
l
ls?
”
“
Yes.
”
“Ok,wearegoi
ngtokeepherher
ef orawhi
l
e
observ
ingher
.Sheisgoi
ngtobefine.”
“
Ok.
”
“
Howi
sshe?
”
“Somet
imesshefor
get
s.Shef
orget
sme.
Someti
messheremembersev
eryt
hing.
”
Thedoct
orsmi
l
ed.“
Ok,
shei
sgoi
ngt
obef
ine.
”
Thedoctorwal
kedoutasAronawal
kedi
nthewar
d.
Helookedathergr
andmother
.
“Pr
ett
yol
dthi
ng,wonderwhyyoudidn’
ttakeaf
ter
her
.Shemusthavebeentheshi
tduri
ngherti
me”
Kennywal
kedoutoft
hewar
dwi
thAr
onabyhersi
de
t
hensatoutsi
de.Aronasatnextt
oherthensi
ghed
t
aki
ngoutacigarett
efrom hi
spocketwit
hali
ghter
.
“
What’
swr ongwithher?”
“
Bloodpressur
e.I
fy ouwantt
osmoke,
smokef
ar
f
rom me.Ihaveasthma.”
Hepausedt
henputev
ery
thi
ngbacki
nhi
spocket
.
“
Wher
eisy
ourmot
her
?”
Kennyshr
uggedtearf
ull
y.“Wit
hherhusbandand
ki
ds,andt
heirdogli
vi
ngt hei
rper
fectexpensi
vel
i
fe.
”
“
Sibl
i
ngs?
”
“
None,expectf
rom mymother
’sotherki
ds.I
fIl
ose
mygrandmother
,Iwon’
thaveanyone.
”
“Whosaidyouar
elosi
ngher
?HerBPbei
nghi
gh
doesn’
tmeansheisgoi
ngtodi
e.”
“
ShehasAl
zhei
mer
’sdi
seaset
oo.
”
“Thi
sist
oosadf
orme,
come,
Iwantt
oshowy
ou
somethi
ng.
”
Hest
oodupt
hengr
abbedherhandwi
thasmi
l
e.
“
Whatar
eyoushowi
ngme?
”
“
Come.
”
Hel
edhert
ohi
scart
hendr
oveof
fwi
thher
.

*
**

Mothusigotoutoft
het
axi
thenwal
kedi
nsi
det
he
hospi
tal
.
.
.
.
Don'
tfor
getl
i
keandcomment
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#4

Hewentt
other
ecept
ion.
“Iam l
ookingforanoldwomanwhowasbr oughti
n
byagirlnamedKenei l
weLaolang.Shebroughtin
GladysLaolang.Iam afr
iendofthei
rs.
”

*
**

Minutesl
aterMot husiwal kedinsidethewardand
l
ookedatKenny ’sgrandmot herbutshewassl eeping.
Onherbedside,therewasnoone, nowhewonder ed
whereKennyhadgone.May beshehadwentback
forhergr
andmot her’
st oil
etryandcl ot
hes.Atthis
stagehewasr eall
yconv incedheneededt ogethera
phone.Godknewany thingcoul dhappentoherand
noonewoul dknoworbeabl etocommuni cat
ewi th
her.
Het
ookouthi
sphoneasi
tvi
brat
edt
henopenedt
he
messagef
rom FNB.
FNB M.DI SEKOsentyouP1500.GetcashatCash
PluspartnerorPr
essPROCEEDatFNBATM.PI N
05308,isvali
dfor16hr
s.I
fPINexpir
ed,di
al
*130*392#
Hesmiledhappil
ythenqui
ckl
ywal
kedoutashi
s
br
othercal
led.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Di
dy ouseeit
?Goandgetthef
ormalcl
othes,good
shoes,cuty
ourhai
r,f
ixy
ourCVandgetthatjob.
”
“
Thanky
ousomuch.
”
“Sur
elai
taka.Ihopey
ougett
hej
ob.I
sitcl
oset
o
home?”
“No,atfi
rstIthoughtitwaslocal
.It’
sinMaun.
Thabangi stheonewhot oldme,Iwi l
lbest
ayi
ng
wit
hhi mtill
Icanaf f
ordmyownpl ace.
”
“
Ok.Ir
eal
l
yhopey
ougeti
t,hav
eyout
oldKenny
?”
“Yes,It
oldhert
heti
meIt houghti
twasaroundhere
butIhaven’
tgott
enthechancetotel
lherIwi
llbe
mov i
ng.”
“Ok,wewil
ltal
k.Hopefull
yy ougoorit
yanddon’t
chooseKenny.Iknowy ouloveherbutyou’
vegott
o
l
ookatthebiggerpict
ure.
”
“
Iknow.
”
“
Good.
”
Hehungupandj umpedcel ebrat
ing.Hequickl
y
walkedtot hebusst opwher ehegotacombi tothe
mall.Thepassenger slookedathi m ashesmiled
t
henhepr essedhislipstogetherconceali
ngthat
r
etardedsmi le.Helookedatt hemessagef rom FNB
t
hought f
ullythendroppedof fatthemal l
andwal ked
t
owar dsthephoneshop.

*
**

Aronapar
kedt
hecaratt
her
iverl
odget
henst
epped
out.“
Comeher
e.”
Kennyst
eppedouti
nherbrowni
shshapel
essdr
ess,
Aronat
ookherhandthenwal
kedwit
hher.
“
Thi
spl
acei
sbeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Yeah…”
Theywal kedt other ecepti
onthenhespokebrief
lyt
o
thereceptionistbeforetheywalkedtot
her i
ver.
Kennysmi ledst ar
ingatt hevi
ew.Aronalookedat
herasthewi ndblewherdr ess.
“St
andfi
rmly,t
hewi
ndmi
ghtbl
owy
ouaway
.Youar
e
sothi
nit
’ssad.”
Kennyl
aughedst
ari
ngathi
m.“
Iam sl
enderby
nat
ure.
”
Hergr
andmother’
ssmallphonerangfrom herhands
t
henshetookitoutandansweredtaki
ngast epback.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Uhu,Keneilwe,ismamadead?Igotacal l
from t
he
hospit
al.Icouldn’thearthem proper
ly.Weneedto
star
tplanningherf uneral
.Wehav et
omakei tqui
ck
becauseIam t raveli
ngoutoft hecountr
yintwo
week’stime, meandmyf ami
ly.”
Di
shear
tened,
Kennysighed.“
Sheisal
i
ve,herbl
ood
pr
essur
ehadpickedbutsheisfi
nenow.”
“
Oh…ok.
”
Kennysteppeddur
therawayfr
om Arona.“
Butwe
don’
thavefoodathome.Herpensi
onisnot
enough.
”
“Keneil
we, Idon’
thavemoney ,I
fIhadmoneyIwould
besendi ngsome.Iam alsostruggl
i
ng.Youneedto
l
ookf orajobbecausey oujustcan’
tsi
tandexpect
tobef ed.Mymot her’
spensionisnotf
oryouto
spendi t
,it
’sforhert
otakecareofhersel
f.
”
“
Ipassed.Iam goi
ngt
oappl
ytoUB.
”
“Youpassed?Wonder sshal lneverend!Kanawi t
h
thewayy ouar esodumb, youwi l
lprobablyfai
l atUB.
UBisnotchi ld’splay,yout hi
nkit’
shi ghschool?It’
s
hardthere.IfIwer eyouIwoul djustsavemy selfthe
ti
meandsi tathome, may bef i
ndaj ob.Soonenough
youwoul dbepr egnant,dumbpeopl eli
keyout endto
getpregnant .Don’tevencomet omewhent hat
happens, Ihavenot hi
ngt odowi t
ht hat.
”
“
Ihav
etogo.
”
“Whatdidthedoctor
ssayaboutmymot her
’s
si
ckness?Ihavebeental
ki
ngtomyl awyer,
my
motherisnotfi
ttobemakingdeci
sionsonherown.
Iam thi
nki
ngofsendi
nghertoherbr
other
’shouse,
youcan’tt
akecar
eofherthat
’swhyshewonders
aroundnaked.
”
“
Whataboutme?
”
“Yourauntwi
lltakeyou.Ihaven’
tfi
nali
zedtheissue
butIwanttorentoutthatplacesothatIusethat
moneyt ohel
pmymot her.Idon’
thaveairt
ime.Bye.
”
Kennyputawayt hephoneblinki
ngawayhertears.
Aronawalkedoverasshetriedpull
ingher
self
toget
herbutherlipst
rembledmor easshethought
ofhergrandmotherbeingt
akenaway .
Shebr
okedowncryi
ngthenhesi
ghedandpul
l
edher
i
nhisarms.“
Whathappened?
”
Shetr
iedtotal
kbuthersobskeptget
tingi
ntheway
.
Herubbedherbackholdi
ngherti
ghtl
yinhi
sarmsti
ll
shefi
nall
ykeptqui
et.
Hesmil
edt
il
ti
ngherchi
n.“
Youar eal
readyugl
y,
wheny
oucryitmakesi
tworse.
”
Shelookedathi
m andlaughedasat
earr
oll
eddown
hercheek.“
Iam notugl
y.
”
“
Youarenot
.Youar
eact
ual
lybeaut
if
ul,
butwhen
y
oucry
, y
oubecomeabi
tugl
y.”
Hewi
pedawayherteart
hensi
ghedst
ari
ngather
.
“
Whathappened?
”
“Mymot herwant
storentoutmygr
andmother’
s
house,
sheev encal
l
edthinki
ngmygrandmotheri
s
dead.
”
“Howissherenti
ngi
toutwheny
ourgr
andmot
heri
s
stay
ingt
here?”
“Mygr
andmot herhasAl
zhei
mer’sdisease,shesays
shei
snotfitenoughtomakeherowndeci sionsso
shei
sgoingtotakehertoherbr
other’
shouset hen
movemet omyaunt ’
shouse.
”
“Shecan’tdothat,
theprocessi
spret
tylongand
yourgrandmothercanevenchooseyout omakethe
deci
sionsforherbecauseyouareover18.Howlong
haveyoubeenst ayi
ngwithher?
”
“
SinceIwas8.
”
“
Thecourtwi
lll
ookint
ot hat
,al
sot hehist
oryandso
f
ort
h.Youshoul
dn’tst
ressoverthat.Shethi
nksit
’s
goingtobeawal kinthepark,
butitwil
lbemore
thanthat
,itcantakeyear
s.Youshouldn’
tlet
someonewhodoesn’ tcareaboutyoutakemuchof
yourpeace.That’
sgiv
ingthem contr
olandyoudon’
t
wanttodot hat.
”
“
Easyt
osay
.”
“Youcan’tl
etsomeonewhodoesn’tl
oveyoumake
youcry.That
’sbei
ngstupi
d.It
houghtyouwer
enot
stupi
d.”
“
Youhav
est
art
ed.
”
“Ar
eyougoi
ngt
ocol
l
ege?
”
“Notyet
.”Shesmi
l
ed.“
IpassedsoIam goi
ngt
o
UB.”
“
That
’sni
ce,
andwhatar
eyougoi
ngt
ost
udy
?”
“
Ihav
en’
tdeci
dedy
et.
”
“Ok,butbecarefulwhenyoumakesuchdeci si
ons.
Somet i
meswegetsoexci t
edaboutgoingt o
univ
ersityandchoosethesecoursesthatwon’tget
youany wherei
nl i
fe,
youwillbepartofthe
unemploy edwit
hadegr eesit
ti
nginthehouse.
You’vegottodowhatmakesmoney ,docreati
ve
coursesthanacademicsones,
someofusl ear
ntthe
hardway ,y
oushouldn’
tmakethosekindof
mistakes.
”
“
Whatdi
dyoust
udy
?”
“
Account
ancy
.”
“
Youar
efr
om ar
oundher
e?”
Hel
aughed.“
DoIl
ookr
ural
toy
ou?
”
Kennychuckl
ed.“
Youar
eful
lofy
our
sel
f.
”
“
Iwasstressed,
Icameher
etounwi
ndal
ltheway
f
rom Gabs.”
Somethingmovedi
nthewat
erthenKennymov
ed
back.“
Somethi
ngisi
nthewater
.”
“
Ofcausesomet
hingi
sint
hewat
erKenny
.Whatdo
y
ouexpect?
”
“
Let
’sgo.
”
Theywal kedbacktohiscarandgotin.Hestart
ed
thecarashi sphonerang,hedroppedthecal
ldri
vi
ng
off.I
trangagainthenheignored.
“
Shoul
dIt
akey
out
othehospi
tal
?”
“
No,
takemehome.
”
“
Ok.
”

*
**

Heparkedi
nfrontofhergat
ethenKenny’
sheart
ski
ppedasshelookedatMothusiseat
edbythe
ver
andahol
dingaplasti
c.
“
Who’
sthat
?”
“
Myboy
fri
end.
”
“Ok,l
etmet akeyournumbersoIcancheckmy
pret
tyladyatthehospi
tal
.Doesn’
tshewantaben10?
Icanmakeherhappykana. ”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Doy
out
akeany
thi
ngser
iousl
y?”
Hetookthetinyphoneandsavedhi
snumber.“
Tel
l
t
hatguyt obuyyouaphone.Youcan’
tbeusi
ngthi
s.
Ojesateam.”
Kennylaughedst
eppi
ngoutofthecart
henwal
ked
i
nsidetheyardwhi
leAronadr
oveoffpi
cki
nghi
s
ri
ngingphone.
“
Lesangwhatdoy
ouwant
?”
“Youar
esosi
ck,
soy
our
anawayaf
tery
out
ri
ed
kil
l
ingme?
”
“
WhatwasIdoi
ngwr
ong?
”
“Idon’
tloveyou.Inev
erl ovedyouArona.Youareso
stupi
d.Iam notyourtype,Iwasneveryourtype.My
boyfri
endisgoingtomakesur eyougot ojai
l
.You
won’tgetawaywi t
hthis.Nxla!
”
Shehungupt
henheswal
l
oweddr
ivi
ng.

*
**

Kennyappr
oachedMot
husi
.“Hey
…”
“
Iwentt
othehospi
tal
.Idi
dn’
tfi
ndy
ou.
”
Kennycl
ear
edherthr
oat
.“Iwentt
ogether
somethi
ngtoeat
.”
“
Whowast
hat
?”
Sheswal
lowed.“
MmgaweTshiamo’sbrot
her
’sson.
Hehel
pedmet akehert
othehospi
tal
thendr
oveme
tot
heshopstogetherf
ood.
”
“
Oh…It
hought
…”
“
Yout
houghtwhat
?”
Heshookhishead.“
Never
mi nd.”Hest
oodupand
smi
led.“
Iboughtyousomething.”
Hehandedherthepl
ast
icfr
om Cel
lCi
ty.Kenny
’s
heartst
art
edpoundi
ngasshet
ookouttheboxof
HisenseU605.
“
Ist
hismi
ne?
”
“Yes.If
inal
l
ygotpai
dandt
hisi
sther
eal
bir
thday
present
.”
Kennyscreamedjumpingupanddownhappi
l
y.
Mothusihuggedherl
aughing.
“
Don’
tspr
ainy
ourl
eg.
”
Tear
sfi
l
ledherey
esashappi
nessov
erwhel
medher
.
“
Thanky
ou.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
It
’sok.Youdeser
vei
t.
”
Kennyunlockedthedoort
hent
heywalkedi
n.She
tookoutherbrandnewphonef
rom t
heboxwhilehe
star
edwithasmi l
e.
“
Iev
engoty
ouasi
m car
d.”
Kennyl
ookedathim emoti
onal
l
y.“Thankyou.If
eel
sobad,
Iknowy ouneedthatmoneyand-“
“
Don’
twor
ryabouti
t.
”
Shet ookoutthechar gerandt heear phonest hen
raisedherheadbl ushi ng.Hehadnev erseenher
smi l
esomuchl i
ket hat ,shelookedev enmor e
beaut i
fulwhenhappy .Mot husi tookt hephonef rom
herandputi tdownt henpul ledherf orani ntense
kiss.Shekissedhim backt henhepi ckedherupand
l
edhert oherroom wher ehel ayheronherbed
pulli
ngoutherpant ies.Het ookof fherdr esst hen
hist-shir
tandkissedherset t
lingbet weenherl egs.
Theki ssgotsointense, hetookouthi sdickand
rubbedi tonherwetpussybr eathingheav ily
.
“Canyoupl
easeuseacondom.Iam notr
eadyf
ora
chil
d.”
“
Met
oo,
Iwi
l
lpul
lout
.”
“
That
’snotsaf
eMot
husi
.”
“
Iti
s,t
rustme.
”
Heki
ssedheragai
nand#r
emov
ed.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#4
#r
emov
ed

Hekissedheragai nandf or
cedhisdi ckin.He
pushedherl egswiderapartpushingev enmor ethen
groanedast hetipsl
idin.Herti
ghtnesssqueezi ng
hi
m somuchhef ear
edhewoul dn’tlastlongwhi l
e
herwar mnessengulfedhim.Unabl etocont r
ol
hi
msel f,hepushedfurt
herinwhi l
eKennyf r
owned
withdiscomf or
tandpain.
Mot husist
art
edt
hrust
ingsl
owlyasthesweetness
gottohim.Heputherl
egonhisshoulderdi
ppi
ngin
evenmor e,
“
OhFuck!
”
Kennyfl
i
nchedmovi
ngbackt
henhef
oll
owedaf
ter
pushi
nghisdi
cki
nsi
de.
“
Fucky
ouf
eel
sogood…”
Hesl oweddowngi v
inghergentl
estrokeski
ssing
herthenpausedsl i
dingoutandpull
edhertothe
cornerofthebedandsl i
dinbackinthatsweet
pussywhi l
eherfl
apssqueezedhim.Hewat ched
hi
m di ppi
nginandoutofherwhileherpussy
greasedhisdick.
Thepainandpl easur
est art
edmixi
ngashethrust
i
ntoherseveral t
imes.Shemoanedsof t
lymovi
ngas
thepl
easureslowl yi
ncreased.What
everhewas
tappi
ngfel
tsogood.
Hest artedbreathi
ngheav il
yincreasi
nghisspeed,
theirbodiesslappingagainstoneanot her.Kenny
moanedev enmor ebei
ngser vedthefastdeep
strokes,herpussyl ubr
icat
inghim evenmor e.Heput
bothherl egsonhershoul dersandst art
edf ucki
ng
herlosinganyl astcontrolhehad.
Kennysqueezedherbr
eastmoaning,
itf
eltsogood
thathert
oescurl
ed.Hesl
idhi
sdickoutthenrubbi
ng
hercli
twithitwhil
eshemoanedsqueezi ngher
breastevenmor e.Hepushedhisdickthroughher
ti
nyholestretchi
ngitthenwatchedhimselfrav
ish
her.Herbreastsshookwi t
heachthrust,
helookedat
herwentev enharderenjoyi
ngeverysecond.
Hehadwaitedforthismomentforfart
oolong.
Kennycl
osedherey esasthepl
easuregoteven
moreint
ense,shecouldfeel
herbodyti
ghteni
ng.
Mothusi
sli
doutassheenj
oyedst
roki
nghi
sdi
ck
wi
thhishandai
mingatherst
omach.
*
**

Insi
dethewar dr
obe,Tshenolovomitedstr
uggli
ngto
breat
he,itf
eltasifshewasgettingsuff
ocatedand
eachbreathshetookwasl abor
ed.Shebangedt he
wardrobedoor.
“
Hel
pme!Iam dy
ing!
”
Shebangedt
hewar
drobeeachhar
derscr
eami
ng.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#5

Keat
aret
sitr
iedopeni
ngthewardr
obebuti
twas
l
ocked.Afemalevoi
cescreamedfr
om i
nsi
de.
“
Hel
pme!
”
“
Whoar
eyou?
”
“
Hel
p!Ican’
tbr
eat
he.
”
PeggylookedatKeatar
etsi
wit
haf
rown.“
Howdi
d
sheevengetinhere?
”
“WhenIcamet oday,t
hehousewassmel l
i
ngsex
,I
askedThabobuthedeni edi
t.Bat
hongthi
smanhas
star
tedagai
n.”Tearsfi
ll
edhereyes.“
Koor
ehewil
l
neverst
opcheating.
”
Peggybangedt
hewar
drobe.“
Howdi
dyouget
i
nside?
”
“
Pleasehel
pme.
”
“
Kanammeifyoudon’
ttal
k,y
ouar
egoi
ngt
odi
e
i
nsi
det
her
e.”
“Thabo,myboy
fri
endbr
oughtme.Ican’
tbr
eat
he.
Pleasehel
pme.”
Feeli
ngweak,Keat
aret
sislowlysatdownt ear
ful
l
yas
somethingsatonhert
hroat.Peggylookedather
fr
iendsadly
.
“Wearegetti
ngheroutofthere.Sheisgoingto
expl
ainwhatisgoingon.Getyourphoneready.We
aregoingtoembarrassheronfacebook.Akereshe
doesn’
trespectt
her i
ngonhisfinger
,shewill
suff
er.
”
Peggywal kedt othekitchenandcamebackwi t
ha
knif
e.Shewentwi t
hthekni f
eont hedoorwhi l
e
Keataret
siwat ched.Mi nuteslat
erthedooropened
thenshedr oppedt heknifeandpul l
edoutTshenolo
withherhair.Shest eppedbackast hefi
rstwaveof
thesmellhither .Tshenolotri
edstandingasfreshai
r
brushedherski n,herpantyandphonei nherhands.
“
Thabobr
oughtmeher
e.”
“Youdatemarr
iedmen, y
ouareahomewreckerand
youprobabl
ydon’tcar
eaboutany
onebuty
ourself
.
Kegoreyouareouthereworki
ngsohar
dtodestroy
anot
herwoman’
smar
ri
age.
”
Tshenoloshookherheadstari
ngatthetwol
adi
es.“
I
di
dn’tknowhewasmar r
ied.Henevert
oldmehe
was-“
Peggyslappedheracrossthef
ace.“
Youwhat?Kea,
getthesti
ck,kanashethi
nksweareplay
ing.
”
Keastoodupandwal kedout sidewhereshecame
backwiththelongsti
ck,nowasshel ookedatt hi
s
gi
rlshegotev enmoreangr y.Itwast hefactthatshe
hadusedherbed, hersheets, herbedroom,her
house.Angri
lysheraisedthest ickandstarted
beati
ngTshenolo.
Peggysteppedback.“ Youthi
nky ouaresmar tbut
youarenot.Youwr eckourmar ri
ages,wehav e
workedsohar dforthesemar r
iages,putupwithal ot
foryout
oj ustdestr
oyt hatal
lbecausey oucan’tf
ind
yourown?Ot sil
egony el
agompi eno.
”
Shetookherphoneandbegunr ecordi
ngavi
deo.
“Kea,sheshouldundr ess.Iam t
akingavi
deo.Sheis
goingtotrend.Undressmony ana!Akerey
ouwer e
nakedlastnightwit
hsomeone’ shusband?Undress.
”
Tshenololookedatthem cr
ying,
shecoul
dn’
treall
y
fi
ghtthem, notwhenshewasgoi ngupagai
nsttwo
fatl
adies.
“
Undr
ess!
”
“Iam sor
ry.Idi
dn’
tknow.Pl
easef
orgi
veme.Iwi
l
l
stayawayfrom hi
m.”
Keashookherheadangr
il
y.“
Youcametomyhouse
andsl
eptwithmyhusbandonmybed?Undr
essl
ike
youdi
dlastnight
.”
Tshenolocoveredherfacecrying.“
Thisoneis
pl
aying.Kea,cutof
fthathair.Akerethat
’swhat
makeshert hi
nksheisallthat.
”
Keatookthescissorst
hengrabbedTshenol
o’shair
andchopped.Tshenolopushedherof
fasKeat er
etsi
thr
ewherhairont hefl
oor
..
“
Leav
emeal
one!
”
Peggyputt hephonedownt henhelddownTshenol o
asKeachoppedof fal
lherhai
r.Keatar
etsiwentto
herdressandcutitonepieceandt ookitoff
Tshenolo.Theytookoffherpanti
esleavingher
naked.
Peggyt
ookthephoneandconti
nuedtaki
ngt he
vi
deowhil
eTshenol
otri
edhidi
ngherpriv
ates.
“
Iam goingt
opostyouonfacebook.Aker
ewena
y
outhinkyouar
eall
that?
”
“Iam goi
ngtosuey ou.Youthinky oucanjustsl eep
withmyhusbandandgetawaywi thit?Iam suing
you!Mybed?Mybed?Ont wael athatamony anake
wena.”Keawalkedov erandkickedherv agi
na.
Tshenolocur
ledherselfi
ntoabal lcry
ingast hey
conti
nuedtoharassandhumi liat
eheri nfr
ontoft he
camera.Keatookherphonet hencal l
edThabo.
“
Babe…”
“Aft
erev ery
thingIdi dforyou,youst il
lfi
nditri
ghtt o
bri
ngy ourwhor est omyhouse?ThehouseIpayr ent
forThabo.It akecareofy ou,Idoev er
y t
hingi
nt he
housebecausey ourstupidsalarycan’ tdoshit!You
dri
vemyf ather’
scombi yetyoucan’ tevenrespect
me.Iwantadi vorceandIam wal kingoutwi t
h
everyt
hing.Yout hinkyouar esmar tbuty ouaret he
mostst upidmani nt hewor l
d.Wai tandwat ch, y
ou
ar
egoi
ngt
oregr
ett
his.
”
“
Babe,
Icanexpl
ain.
”
“Youwil
lexpl
aini
ncourt.Iam f
il
ingfordiv
orce.
ThankGodIdidn’
tcomebackwi ththekids,Iam
goingt
odealwithyou.
”
ShehungupthenPeggyupl
oadedt
hev
ideoon
facebook.
“
Takey
ournonsenseandl
eav
e.”
Tshenologotupcry
ingthent
ookherdresswr appi
ng
i
taroundhersel
fandwalkedouthol
dingherphone.
Keater
etsil
ookedatherpant
ythenPeggypickedit
up.
“Wearesti
llnotdonewit
hher,
ther
eist
hismanI
know.Sheisyetgoingt
osuff
erti
ll
thel
astdayshe
breat
hes.
”

*
**

Out
side,
Tshenol
opul
l
edherdr
esst
oget
herwal
ki
ng
t
henacarsl
oweddownandal
adyr
oll
eddwonher
wi
ndow.
“
Nnanaweh,
yourdr
ess…”
Tshenol
olookedathercr
ying.“
What
’swr
ong?
”
“
Theyt
oremydr
essandt
ookav
ideoofmenaked.
”
“
Who’
sthey
?”
Tshenol
ocri
edexplai
ningt
oherthenshesi
ghed.
“Geti
n.Iam si
ckandti
redofwomenwhot hinki
t’
s
oktobeatotherwomanwhentheprobl
em isher
man.Getin,
wear egoi
ngtothepoli
ce.
”
“
Shesai
dshei
sgoi
ngt
osueme.
”
“
Shewon’
tdoany
thi
ngwhi
l
einj
ail
.Tr
ustme.
”
Tshenol
ogotint
hecarthenthel
adygav
ehera
j
acket.“
Youcanputt
hison.”
“
Thanky
ou.
”

*
**
Mothusi
sprayedhiscum onKenny’
sstomach
gr
unti
ngthencoll
apsedbesideher
.Kennytear
ful
l
y
l
ookedattheceil
i
ng.
“
Ifoundoutthatthejobisi
nMaunsoIam goi
ng
t
omor r
ow.IfIgetit
,itmeansIwon’
tbecomi
ngback
t
il
lendofmont hwhenIgetpaid.
”
“
Youwhat
?”
“Yeah.Ifeelsosadleavi
ngyoubutIreal
lyneedthe
j
ob.Iwantt ospoilyouli
kehowotherpeoplespoi
l
thei
rgirl
fri
ends.Youalsohavet
odoy ourhairand
nail
s.”Hekissedhercheek.
“Iam goingtogetpregnantMot husiandIcan’t
affordthat
.Unl
ikeyouIdon’ thaveparentswhowill
takecareofmeandmybur dens.Imaginewhatthat
woul ddotomygr andmot her.Iwanttogoto
universi
tyandhel
pherbuty ouhavedestroyedmy
dream becauseyouwon’ tli
stentome. ”
“Iam goi
ngtogetaj
ob.I
twon’
tbehar
dtaki
ngcar
e
ofmychild.
”
“
Iwantt
ogot
ouni
ver
sit
y!”
“Kenny,Ipul
l
edout
,youar
enotgoi
ngt
oget
pregnant.
”
Shegotof fbedcryi
ng.“Peopl
ehavegottenpregnant
tothatstatement
.Youmi ghthav
efai
ledbuty ou
can’tpossi
blybel
ievethat
.Mygrandmotherissick.I
haveal oti
nmypl at
erightnowandyoudecidet odo
thi
st ome.Youdon’tcareaboutme,all
youcar e
aboutisthesex.”
Mothusiwipedhi
msel
fthenputonhisbri
efsand
pant
s.“Babe,noonei
sgett
ingpregnant
.”
“Stopsayingt
hat
,yousounddumb!Iam real
l
ysad
thatyouhadtodothi
stome.Todayy ouaretal
ki
ng
aboutgoingtoMaunwhent her
emightbea
possibi
li
tyofmebri
ngpregnant.
”
“
Isoundwhat
?”
“
Youhear
dme.
”
“Iam goi
nghome,
Iwi
l
ltal
ktoy
ouwheny
ouar
e
calm.
”
Heputonhi
st-shurtt
henwalkedout.Kennyputher
handsov
erherfacecryi
ng,
theli
tt
lehopeshehad
st
art
edt
ohav
edi
mmi
ng.
Shewentt othebathr
oom andtookashowert hen
tookt hebrandnewphone, shedidn’tf
eelasexcited
any more.Sheputthesim cardandqui ckl
y
register
editthencopiedArona’
snumberf r
om the
smal lphone.Hewast heonlyonehecoul dthinkof.
Shet appedhisnumberandcal l
edhi m wit
ht he
freebiethatcamewi t
hthesim card.Thephoner ang
foracoupl eofseconds.
“
Hel
l
o?”
Kennyt
ookadeepbr
eat
hin.“
Hi,
thi
sisKenny
.”
Hel
aughed.“
Nor
mal
gir
lswai
ttobecal
l
ed.
”
Shesighed.“Iam sor
ryf
ordoingt
his.Iknowyou
andIdon’tknoweachotherandIappreciat
eyou
hel
pingmet oday.”
“
Idi
ditf
ormygi
rlatt
hehospi
tal
,noty
ou.
”
“Idopi
ecejobsandIhaven’
tbeenpaid.Mmama
needproperf
ood.Coul
dy oupleasel
endmesome
money,Iwil
lpayi
tbackwhent hepeoplewhoowe
mepaymeback.Ipr omi
se..”
“
Ok,
howmuchdoy
ouneed?
”
“
P100.
”
“
Wil
lthatbeenoughf
orf
ood.
”
“Ican’
tbor
rowalot
,Iwon’
taff
ordt
opayitback
becauseIwantt
ostar
tsavi
ngforv
arsi
ty.
”
“Youdon’thav
etor
etur
nit
.Iwoul
dcomebutIam
alr
eadyfar.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
“Iwi
l
l sendi
tont
henumbery
oucal
l
edwi
tht
hrough
ewal
let.”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Hechuckl
ed.“
Bye.
”
Hehungupt henmi
nutesl
ateramessagefrom FNB
report
edonherphone.Kennygaspedreadi
ngthen
call
edhim back.
“
Ithi
nky
oumadeami
stake.Isai
dP100not
-“
“
IknowwhatIsentKenei
lwe.Chri
stmascomesonce
ayear
.St
opcall
ingme,Iam dri
vi
ng.”
HehungupthenKennylookedatt
heewal l
ett
hen
wal
kedoutl
ockingbehi
ndher.Shelookedat
mmagweTshenolowalkingi
nsi
dethey ar
dwitht
he
pol
i
ce.
“
Thi
sisher
,sheknowswher
emydaught
eri
s.”
Thepol
i
cel
ookedatKennywhol
ookedconf
used.
“
Heywenangwanawamol
oi,
tel
lthepol
i
cewher
e
mydaught
eri
s!”
“No,l
et’
stal
kpeaceful
ly
.Noneedtocallhernames.
Kenei
lwewhenlastdidyouseeTshenol
o?”
“
Lastni
ghtwhenshewaswi
thherboy
fri
end.Thabo
whodri
vescombi
s.”
“
Thabowacombi
dri
ver
a?”
“
Eer
ra.Theywer
eatacl
ub.
”
“Ok,t
hankyou.Wearesor
ryforthi
s.”Thepol
ice
l
ookedatmmgaweTshenol o.“
Thissolv
esit
.Your
daughteri
sover18.
”
Theywalkedbacktothepol
icevanthenmmgawe
Tshenol
olookedatKennyangri
l
y .
“Whycan’
tyoust
ayawayfrom mydaughter?St
ay
awayfr
om mydaught
er!Youarebadinf
luence.
”
Sheturnedandwal
kedbackt ohercart
hendroveoff.
Secondslat
eracarparkedatthegat
ethenTshenolo
st
eppedout.Shestar
tedcryi
ngthenthr
ewherselfat
Kenny.
“
Theywer
ebeat
ingme.Hei
smar
ri
ed.
”
“
Mar
ri
ed?
”
“Yes.Hi
swifeandfr
iendbeatmeandtookav i
deo
ofmenaked.Helockedmei nthewar
drobeandI
wasi nt
her
ethewholetime.
”
Kennyst eppedbackandbur stoutlaughing.“
You
wereint hewardrobe.Shame,theout goi
nggirlwho
i
snotbor i
ngandwhodoesn’ tbehav eli
kea
grandmot herandwho’sgrandmot herisnot
dement edandwonder saroundnakedwasi nthe
wardrobe? ”
“
Kennyt
heypost
edmyv
ideoonf
acebook!
”
Kennyl
aughedharder.“
Youli
e!Nowy ouarereal
ly
theout
goi
nggir
l.Outgoingwi
thnakednessreachi
ng
mi
l
li
onsofpeopl
eonf
acebook.
”
“
Thi
sisnotf
unny
.”
“Ihopey ougetsuedt henyougot ojai
lbecausey ou
can’tpaytheamount .Iam bori
ng, Ihaveacr azy
dement edgrandmot herbutatleastmynudi tyisnot
cir
culati
ngonf acebookr i
ghtnow.Atl eastIam not
dati
ngamar ri
edmanandIwasn’ tlockedinthe
wardrobe.Icertai
nlydidn’
tgetbeat enbyhiswi f
e
andherf ri
end.
”
ThehatTshenol
owaswear
igf
ell
offasshel
ooked
atKennyt
earful
l
y.
“
Jeso!Whati
sthat
?”
Tearsrol
leddownKenny ’
scheeksasshelaughedt
il
l
shewasi npai
n.Shelookedawaythenlookedat
Tshenoloagai
nlaughi
ngev enhar
der.
“Wharr
isthis?Uhu,
mothookewena.(Thi
spersoni
s
you?)Wai
t sekarmaebosol
athat
a.(
Karmaisnasty
.)
Shame,selonyanasamodimo.”
“
Mxm…”
“
Nyweny
weKennyi
sbor
ing…ny
weny
weKennyi
s
part
ypooper
…Iseewhatbeingexci
ti
nghasdonef
or
you.I
thasdoneal
ot!Tsenawena,t
hegi
rl!
“
Youar
esupposedt
obemyf
ri
end.
”
“Fr
iend?Wenagape?It houghtIwastoobori
ngfor
you.Karmaisnast
y .Soyou…”Unabletospeak,
Kennylaughedsi
tt
ingont hegroundwit
hherbutt.
“Yeei
iMoses!Lukaty
ou!Youdesuf f
erfornonsense!
Godforbi
dohhh!Godf or
bidmebeingwi t
hamar ri
ed
manandget t
ingwhooped.Jeso!Yourchi
ld!
”
“
Mxm.
”
“Yourmot herwashere,youshoul
dgohome, she
broughtthepoliceandcall
edmenames, sheshould
star
trespectingmywi t
chgrandmother
,atleastI
don’tsl
eepwi thmarri
edmen.”
“
Ican’
tgonow.
”
Kennygotupandhandedhert hekeys.“Yahno,
bophelokefatuku,bophelokentwakannet e,
bathongselosamomet sosareget
ti
ngsued, sar
e
dl
ev u.Dl
evuwillki
l
l you.Letmegetgoing.”
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“Defi
nitel
ynott
ohavemyhai
rchoppedbecauseI
am sleepingwi
thamar
ri
edwomanl i
keotherpeopl
e
Iknow.”
Kennywalkedoutandwentt
othebusstoptr
yingt
o
fi
gureouthowmuchwasamor ningaf
ter.
.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#6

Tshenol
oheldherphonewatchingt
hev i
deowhil
e
tear
srol
leddownhercheeks.Shewatchedti
l
lthe
endthenopenedthecomment s.
Comment:Shame,poorchil
d,whyfi
ghtt
hiski
dwhen
i
tseemsyourhusbandistheprobl
em?Ihopethose
twogetar
rest
ed.
Comment:
Nextti
meshewi
l
lknowbet
tert
hant
o
sl
eepwi
thmarr
iedmen!
Comment :
Whyar ey
ouhumil
i
atingherl
i
ket
hatand
beat
ingher?Ihopey
ougotojai
l
.
Comment
:Someonet
agBot
swanapol
i
ceser
vices
ho!
Comment:Shee!Ebi
legi
rldidn’
tshave…hai
ii
ye,how
areyousl
eepi
ngwi t
hpeople’shusbandswi
thsucha
bush?
Comment
:Thi
sispur
eev
il
Comment:Sueher!Thesewhor
esar
eseton
dest
roy
ingourhomes.Sueher
Comment :Youaregoingtojai
lmoloikewena,how
dareyouhumili
atet
hiskidli
kethi
s?Don’tyouknow
yourhusbandsouttherer
emov et
heirri
ngs
Comment
:Haaai
ye!Gat
wehubbykecombi
dri
vi
ra?
Comment
:Andt
hen?Thebush.Lett
hatl
i
lwhor
e
shav
e.
Comment :Youaregoingtojail
!may bethereason
whyy ourhusbandisgoingaft
ery ounggir
lsis
becauseyouar esofatandugly.Lalapi
saman!Deal
wit
hy ourhusband.
Comment :Shame,Ifeelsorr
yforthi
sl i
tt
legi
rl.No
onedeserv
est hi
shonest l
y.Herhusbandprobably
l
iedtoherandasy oungasshei s,shedoesn’tknow
alot
.Ihopesheiswel lwhereversheis.
Repl
y1:
Eishwenamma,
Ihopeshei
sdoi
ngok.
Repl
y2:Nyaabathong,wecan’
tfeel
sorryforthis
gi
rl
.Thesel
it
tl
eratchet
salwaysknow,ther
ei sno
wayshedoesn’
tknow.Thedisr
espectofsleeping
wi
thsomeone’
shusbandist
oomuchbutdoi
ngi
ton
t
hewife’
sbedi
sjustEXTREME.
Tshenoloputdownherphoneandputherhands
overherfacecrying.Shecoul
donlywonderhowshe
wasgoi ngtofacepeople,shewassureal
most
every
onesheknewhadseent hevi
deo.Herphone
rangthenshepi cked.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Whydi
dyoucomeout
?”
“
ThaboIcoul
dn’
tbr
eat
he.
”
“
Seenowy
ouar
egoi
ngt
ocostmemymar
ri
age?
”
“
Whydi
dn’
tyout
ell
mey
ouwer
emar
ri
ed?
”
“Whatdidyout
hink?Thatamanmyagewoul
djust
besingl
e?”
“Youshouldhavetoldme,hadyout
oldmeIwoul
d
haveneverdatedyou.Shetookavi
deoofmeand
postedi
tonf acebook.
”
“
Howi
sthatmypr
obl
em?
”
“
Irepor
tedhert
othepol
i
ce.Shei
sgoi
ngt
ojai
l
.”
“
Youwhat
?”
“
Irepor
tedhert
othepol
i
ce.
”
“
Youar
egoi
ngt
odr
opt
hosechar
ges.
”
“Iam notdroppi
ngthecharges.Sheisal
sogoi
ngt
o
getarrest
edforposti
ngthatvideo.
”
“
Soy
ouwantt
osendmywi
fet
ojai
l
?”
“
Yourwi
feat
tackedme.Idi
dn’
tev
enknowy
ouwer
e
mar
ri
ed.
”
“I
fyoudon’tdropthechar
gesIwil
lki
l
lyouwit
hmy
barehands.Iam notgoi
ngtolety
oudest
roymy
marri
age.Idon’tevenl
oveyou!
”
“Iam notdr
oppi
ngthechar
ges.Thepol
i
cehav
e
probabl
ycall
edherbynow.
”
Hehungupt
hencal
l
edmi
nut
esl
ater
.
“
Ok.Iunder
stand.Iam sor
ryf
orwhat
’shappeni
ng.
”
“
Youdon’
tunder
stand.Myv
ideoi
sst
il
lci
rcul
ati
ng.
”
“Iam sor
ry.Ishoul
dhav etol
dyou.I
t’
sjustt
hatIam
alsopani
cking.Iam scared.
”
“
Iam notdr
oppi
ngt
hechar
ges.
”
“
It
’sf
ine.I
t’
sok.Ar
eyoui
npai
n?”
Tshenolonoddedt
ear
ful
l
y.“
Yes.Shebeatmewi
tha
bi
gstick.”
“
Iam goi
ngt
ogety
ousomepai
nki
l
ler
s.Wher
ear
e
y
ou?”
“
Iam atKenny
’shouse.
”
“
Ok,
Iwill
bether
einaf
ewmi
nut
es.Whatel
sedo
y
ouneed?”
“
Iam hungr
y.Ihav
en’
teat
ent
hewhol
eday
.”
“
Ok.Iam comi
ng.
”
“
Ok.
”
HehungupthenTshenolotookabat
handchanged
i
ntooneofKenny
’sdresses.

*
**

Att
hemal
l
,Kennydr
ankt
hemor
ningaf
terand
si
ghedr el
ieved.Shewal kedaroundthenpaused
st
aringatar estaurant
’sjobvacancyjob.Shewalked
i
nsidether estaur
antandwentt otheIndianladywho
wasatt het i
l
l.
“
Dumel
ang…”
“
HowcanIhel
pyou?
”
“
Isawthaty
ouneedsomeone,
ther
eisaj
ob
v
acancy.
”
“
Yes,
weneedawai
ter
.”
“
Iam av
ail
abl
e.”
“
Hav
eyouev
erwor
kedbef
ore?
”
“Notasawait
erbutIdopi
ecejobs.Iam ahar
d
workerandal
soafastl
ear
ner.Ihavegoodcust
omer
serv
iceandmyEngli
shisv
erygood.”
“
Anycer
ti
fi
cat
e?”
“
No,
butIdohav
emyBGCSEr
esul
ts.Icanshow
y
ou.
”
TheIndianshr
ugged.“
Ineedsomeonet
ost
art
tomorrow.Cometomorrowtheny
oucanst
art
.8
o’
clock.I
fyoudon’
tcome,thej
obwil
lgot
o
someoneelse.What’
syourname?
”
“
Mynamei
sKenei
l
weLaol
ang.
”
“
Ok,
bri
ngy
ourI
Dtomor
row.
”
“
Thanky
ousomuch.Youwi
l
lnotr
egr
ett
his.
”
“
Sal
aryi
sP900.Youwi
l
lbeawai
terandacl
eaner
.”
“
It
’sok.Thanky
ousomuch.
”
Kennywal kedoutsmi li
ng.Sheputherhandsonher
facewithdisbel
ief
.Wast hi
showpeopl egotthei
r
j
obs?Shet ookadeepbr eathi
nt henwalkedi
nsidea
supermarketandpi ckedafewessent i
alsbef
ore
goingtothehospital.Shesmiledfindi
ngher
grandmotherawake.
“
Mmama,
youscar
edme.
”
Hergrandmotherl
aughedasKennyhuggedher
.“I
am f
ine.Iwasworri
edaboutyou.
”
“Iam sorr
y.Nol
o’si
nter
netwasslow.ButIgotaj
ob.
AtanI ndi
anownedrest
aurant
.”
“
Godi
sfai
thf
ul!
”
“
Iam st
art
ingt
omor
row.
”
“
Mama…”
Kennytur
nedtohermot herwhowaswalkingin.She
l
ookedbeauti
ful
asal ways,shel
ookedatKennythen
shookherheadtur
ningtohermot her
.
“
Ihearyouaresick.Iam t
hinki
ngoftaki
ngyouto
y
ourbrother’
shousewherey ouwi
llr
eceivet
he
r
ight
fulcareyouneed.”
“
Arey
oucr
azyKef
il
we?
”
“
Iam t
ryi
ngt
ohel
pyou.
”
“Hel
pyourdaught
ernotme!Youcan’
tev
enbuyhera
sweetandyouwanttohel
pme? ”
“
Youcan’tmakeproperdeci
sions.Iwi
l
lhav
eto
makedecisi
onsf
ory ou.
”
“Youarecrazy
.Iam st
il
lali
veandImakemyown
deci
sions.I
fIcan’
t,
mygr andchi
l
dwil
l.
”
“Kennyi
stoodumbtolookafteryou.Lookather
,
shecan’
tevenl
ookaft
erherself
.”
“
Shecanandshei
staki
ngv
erygoodcar
eofme.I
don’
tknowwheny oubecamethi
spersonbuti
ndeed
moneychangespeople.Youchoseamanov eryour
ownchild!Yout
reathiski
dsli
keyourownyetyou
can’
tevenloveyourdaught
er.Whatki
ndofaperson
areyouKefil
we?”
“
Iam t
ryi
ngt
olookoutf
ory
ou.
”
“Idon’
twanty ourhelp,Iwoul dratherdiet hanget
helpfrom y ou.AndIknowy ouar ewai ti
ngf ort he
dayIdi esoy oucant aket hefarmy ourf atherlef t
,
myhouse…i t’
snotgoi ngt ohappen.Youwi ll
nev er
havethoset hings!”Shespatont hegr ound.“ Ov er
mydeadbody !Youar eawi tchKef i
lwe, Ican’
t
beli
eveIgav ebi r
thtoy ou.Ishouldhav eabor tedy ou
andhadot herki dsbecausey ouaret hewor stcur se
Godhasev ergi venme!Al ivi
ngcur se.Apuni shment
thatIdon’tdeser v
e.Sat an!”
Kef
il
west
art
edcryi
ng.“
Mamawhyar
eyoui
nsul
ti
ng
mewhenIam t
ryi
ngtohel
pyou?
”
“Gowi
thyourhelp!Wickedwoman!Getout!Inev
er
wantt
oseey ourfaceev eragai
n.Ev
enIdi
e,don’
t
cometomyfuner albecauseItoowon’
tcometo
yourf
uneral
ifyoudie.Don’
teverref
ertomeasyour
mother,
Iam notyourmotherbecauseIwon’
thav
e
suchavil
echil
d.Getout,gotoyournicel
i
fe.
”
Kef
il
welookedatKennythenwal
kedout
.Kenny
l
ookedathergr
andmotherwhowascryi
ng.
“
Mmama,
don’
tcr
y.”
“
Idon’
tknowwhatIdi
dtodeser
vet
hatchi
l
d.”
“
Don’
tcr
y.”

*
**

Mot
husif
ini
shedpacki
nghi
sbagthenhismother
wal
kedi
n.Shetookoutmoneyf
rom herbr
a.
“Thi
sisfory
ou.Youcanuset
hisf
orawhi
l
eti
l
lyou
getpai
d.”
“
Thanky
oumama.
”
“
RragweTumel
oisal
readyout
sidewai
ti
ng.Go.
”
Hehuggedhi
smot
heronel
astt
imet
henwal
kedout
wi
thhi
ssmal
lbagandgoti
nRr
agweTumel
o’scar
.
“
Mosi
mane!
”
“
Dumel
ang.
”
“
Oteng?
”
“
Eer
ra.
”
“
Let
’sgo.
”
Herever
sedt
hendr
oveof
fwhi
l
eMot
husi
text
ed
Kenny
.
Mot husi:Heybabe, Igotal i
ftfrom rragweTumel o.
Hei sgoi ngtoMaunsoIt houghtIwoul dsav esome
money .Iam sadt hatIam l eavi
ngwi t
houtsay i
nga
propergoodby eandt hatIam l eavingwhi leyouare
angry .Justsoy ouknow, y ouwon’ tgetpr egnant
becauseIpul ledout .Ilov
ey ou.Hopef ul
lyendof
mont hIwoul dhav ef oundahouset heny ouwillv
isi
t
me.Il ovey ousomuch.Tel lTshenol otosendy ou
what sapp,Iwillrechargey oursi m cardtomor r
ow.I
l
ov ey ousomuch.
Heputhi
sphoneawayandsi
ghedst
ari
ngahead.
*
**

Tshenoloopenedt
hedoorforThabothenhewalked
i
nholdingsmallpl
ast
ic.Hecl
osedthedoorand
l
ookedather.
“
Didy
oubr
ingt
hepai
nki
l
ler
s?”
“
DoyouknowIcanjustki
ll
yout
hent
iey
out
othe
r
oofandst
agesui
cide?”
Tshenol
o’shear
tski
ppedasshel
ookedathi
m.
“Huh?”
“Youthi
nkyouwil
ljustgetmywi
fear
rest
ed?Youar
e
goingtodr
opthosecharges.
”
“
Iam notdr
oppingt
hecharges!Yourwif
eassaul
ted
meandhumili
atedme.Shedeservestoroti
njai
l
!”
Thabodr oppedtheplast
ict
henputhishandsonher
neckstrangli
nghercutti
ngoffherai
rwaycompl
etel
y.
Tshenologaspedwi deni
nghereyesasThabo
squeezedhert hr
oatevenmore.
“
Iam notgoi
ngt
olety
oudest
roymymar
ri
age.
”
Tearsfi
l
ledherey
eswhi l
eshetri
edfighti
ngbuti
t
seemedhejustwantedtokil
lher.Helethergot
hen
Tshenol
ogaspedforaircoughi
ng.
“
Youar
egoi
ngt
odr
opt
hosechar
gesnow!
”
Shenoddedcr
ying.
“
Let
’sgo.
”
Theywalkedoutt
henshelockedandputthekeys
undert
hebrickwher
eKennyusuall
yputthekeys.
Shefol
lowedThabotothecombi.

*
**

Atthepoli
cestat
ion,
Tshenol
owalkedinwit
hascaff
arounfherneckt
henwenttothepol
iceof
fi
ceratt
he
fr
ontdesk.
“Dumelang,Iwouldli
ketodropthechargesIl
aid
earl
ieron.Ir
eportedtwowomanandnowIwantt o
dropthecharges.Wewi l
lsor
titoutper
sonall
y.
”
“
Gasewenamony
anawamof
acebukung?(
Arey
ou
nott
hef
acebookgi
rl
?)”
Tshenolobl
i
nkedawayhert
ear
s.“
Iwantt
odr
opt
he
charges.
”
“
Why
?Ar
eyoubei
ngt
hreat
ened?
”
“
No.Iam f
ine.
”
“
Justwai
tther
ethen.
”

*
**

Awhi l
elater, Keataretsiandherf r
iendwalkedoutof
thepol i
cest at i
ont henwal kedpastThabo’ scombi
goingt othei rcaranddr oveoff.Tshenolowalkedout
holdinghert earsthenbegunt hejourneyhome.
Secondsl ater,Thabodr ovepasthert henshefi
nal
ly
l
ett hetear sout .Shest oodatt hesideoftheroad
cryi
ng.Herphonest artedringi
ngt henshelookedat
hermot her’
snumber .Shehadbeeni gnori
ngher
call
s.Shepi ckedt akingi nadeepbr eath.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Ican’
tbelieveyouwouldchooset ohumili
ateme
l
ikethis!Younowsl eepwithmarriedmen?Ebil
eyou
havepor nographyt
hatiscir
culat
ingaround?Howis
yourfathersupposedtolookathiscoll
eagues?How
couldy oudragournamet hroughthemud? ”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“Ididn’
tsl
eepthewholenightwhil
eyouwer ebusy
chasingaft
ermar r
iedman!Iknowit’
sallKenny’
s
doing.Il
ongtoldyoutostayawayfrom t
hatgir
l,
todaylook?Ineverwantt
oseey ouwiththatgi
rlev
er
again.Doyouhearme? ”
“
Yes.
”
“
Comehome,
rightnow!
”
“
Emma.
”
Tshenol
oqui
ckenedherpace.

*
**

Hour
slat
er,
RragaweTumel
opar
kedt
hecari
nfr
ont
ofThabang’
sgatet
henMothusi
steppedout
.
Thabangwalkedov
ersmi
l
ing.
“
Lai
taka!
”
“
Mist
er!
”
Theybumpedshoul derst
henRr agweTumel o
fl
ushedl i
ghtsonceanddroveoff.Thabangt ookhis
fr
iend’sbagandwalkedwithhimt ohisbackr oom
passingthemainhouse.Abeaut i
fulgi
rlwalkedout
fr
om t heminhousethenMot husil
ookedather
l
ockingey eswit
hher.Sheblushedlookingaway .
“
Who’
sthat
?”
“Oh..t
hat’
sSeletso.Thelandlor
d’sdaught
er.Sheisa
preschoolt
eacher.Iam sohappyt oseeyou.Iam
veryconfi
dentyouwi l
lgetthejob.Wejusthaveto
got hr
oughacoupl eofthingstoget
her.
”
“
Yah…”
Mothusit
urnedandlookedatSel
etsowhowas
walki
ngbackinsi
dethehouse.Thabnagopenedt
he
doortohi
sroom thentheywal
kedinchatt
ing.
3MONTHSLATER…
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#7

AttheIndi
anrestaur
ant,Kennysmiledatt
endingtoa
customer,
shetooktheor deradwenttothekitchen.
Shelookedaroundforthemanagerandqui ckl
ytook
outherphonecheckingthetime.Shesighedputti
ng
i
tbackast hechefsmiledather.
“
Youkeepchecki
ngy
ourphone,
expect
ingacal
l
?”
Kennysmiled.“No.”Shegottheorderofanot
her
tabl
ethenwalkedoutoft hekit
chen.Sheputthe
foodinfr
ontoft hecustomer
’ssmili
ngthenpaused
star
ingatNolowhowashov eri
ngaroundatthe
entr
ancewear i
ngacap.Shequi ckl
ywalkedoutof
thestor
eandsmi l
edstari
ngatNolo.
“
Hey
…”
“
Arey
oubusy
?”
“
Yes,
butwhati
sit
?”
Atearr
oll
eddownNol
o’scheek.“
Ineedt
obor
row
somemoney.”
“
Somemoney
?Forwhat
?”
“Iam pregnantKenny
.Iwantt
ogotouniver
sit
y.Iam
notgoingtogetstuckher
ewithachi
l
d.”
“
Ithoughty
ousai
dyouusedacondom.
”
“Wealway susedoneti
llt
hatnightwewenttot he
cl
ub.Iwasn’tsurewhathappenedsoIjustbrushed
i
toff.Ispoketosomeonewhosel lsabor
ti
onpi l
ls
butsheisinMaun.Youar egoi
ngt oMaunright?You
cangetthem forme.
”
“
Howmuchar
ethey
?”
“
P750.
”
“
What
?”
“Aker
eMothusisentyousomemoneyandy
oual
so
havemoneyyouhav ebeensav
ing.
”
“
Yes,Ihav
ebeensav
ingt
hatmoneyf
orv
arsi
ty
Nol
o.”
“Pl
ease,Iam beggingy
ou.KennyIwantt
ogot
o
uni
versi
ty.Iworkedhar
dforthi
s.”
“
P750i
sal
otofmoneyNol
o.”
“Whatshoul
dIdot hen?Ireal
lyneedthosepil
l
s.Who
wastherewheny ouwerestruggl
ingatschool
?I
gaveyoumyuni for
m,Iwouldeatwi t
hyou,I
sacr
if
icedalotforyouKenny.Whycan’tyoudothe
samef orme?”
“
Tshenol
o,y
ouknowmysi
tuat
ion.
”
“AndIam inasituati
ontooKennyandIam aski
ng
foryoutohelpme. ”Moret
earsrol
l
eddown
Tshenolo’
scheeks.“Ordoyouwantmet okneel
,
shouldIkneelKenny?”
Kennysadl
ylookedathert
henshookherhead.“
Do
yourpar
ent
sknow? ”
“
No.Idon’
twantt
odi
sappoi
ntt
hem ev
enmor
e.”
“
Whycan’
tyout
ell
Thabo?
”
“
HesaidifIev
ertal
ktohi
m hewi
l
lki
l
lmeandIdon’
t
wanthi
swifetosueme.”
“
P750i
sal
otNol
o.”
“Youaresoself
ishKenei
l
we,af
terev
ery
thi
ngIhav
e
doneforyou,
thisishowyout
hankme?”
“
I’
sjust
-“
“
Youar
esosel
fi
sh!
”
Kennysi
ghed.“
Iwi
l
lhel
pyou.
”
Tshenol
osmil
edt
henhuggedKenny
.“Thanky
ouso
much.Thanky
ou.
”
Kennysi
ghed.“
It
’sok.
”
Nol
osteppedbackwi
pingawayhert
ear
s.“
Soy
ou
t
oldhi
my ouarecomi
ng?”
“No.Iam goi
ngtosurpr
isehim.Hesai
dhewon’t
comet hi
smonthsoit’
sonlyfai
rIal
sovisi
thi
m.He
j
ustsentthemoneyforhair
.”
Nolosmiledstar
ingatKenny
’sl
ongbr
aids.“
Ok.Il
i
ke
yourbr
aids.”
“
Thanks.Ihav
etogobackt
owor
k.”
“Ok,l
etmegi v
ey out
henumberoftheguy.Idon’t
haveair
ti
me.Byt heway
,whoareyouleav
ingy our
grandmotherwit
h?”
“Shewenttoat
tendafuneralyester
day.Shewon’
t
bebackti
llMonday.Herbrot
her’swifei
sgoingt
obe
ther
etaki
ngcareofher.Sheisanur se.
”
“
Ok.
”
Kennytookoutherphonet hensav edthenumber
anddashedbacki nsidet herestaur
antbeforet he
managercoul dseeher .Anhourl at
er,shetookof f
theapronremainingwi thherjeanandv est.She
rushedhomewher eshegotherbagandt ookt he
moneyf orthepil
ls.Shecount edtheremai ni
ng
moneyt henshookherheadandwal kedoutl ocki
ng
behindher.Herphoner angasshewal kedt othebus
stop.Shesmi l
edpi cking.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Heybabe,
howi
swor
k?”
“
Fine.Isawt
hemoney
.Thanky
ou.
”
“
Youshoul
dsendmepi
ctur
esoft
hehai
rst
yle.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Imi
ssy
ou.
”
“
Imi
ssy
out
oo.
”
“
Iam r
eal
l
ysor
ryIcan’
tcomet
hismont
h.”
“
It
’sok,
youar
ebusyatwor
k,Iunder
stand.
”
“
Yah,Iam nowwor
kingdoubl
eshi
ft
sforext
ra
money.
”
Acombi
stoppedi
nfr
ontofher
.
“
Mot
husi
Ihav
etogobackt
owor
k.Wewi
l
ltal
k.”
“
Ok,
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Shehungupandgoti nthecombi.Awhi
l
elatershe
wasgetti
ngseatedinthebusgoingt
oMaun.She
pl
uggedherearphonesandli
stenedt
osomesof t
music.

*
**

Laterthatday
,Mot husil
ookedatThabangwhowas
stari
ngathim shakinghi
sheadinhisunif
orm.
“
Ithoughty
oul
ovedKenny
.”
“
Ilov
eher
.”
“
Thenwhyar
eyouar
einar
elat
ionshi
pwi
th
Sel
etso?
”
“Il
oveKennybutshei simmat ur
esomet imes.She
thi
nksl i
keachil
d.Doy ouknowshehasnev er
all
owedmet otouchhersi
nceIbr okehervir
gini
ty?
Seletsoismature,
sheissoftandhaspr oper
reasoning.
”
“
Soy
ouar
egoi
ngt
ojustdumbKenny
?”
“No.ButIam goi
ngt oforcehertogrowup.Next
mont hwhenIgothere,Iam goingtogether
pregnant
.Thatwil
lforcehertoactmature.
”
Thabangfr
owned.“
Ithoughty
ousai
dshei
sgoi
ngt
o
var
sit
y.”
“SheisbutIknowonceshegetstheresheisgoing
tochange.Therear
ecoll
egesher
ei nMaun,ifsheis
pregnantt
henshewon’tgotoGaborone.”
“
That
’sev
il
.Youcan’
tblockherdreamsal
lbecause
y
ouareafr
aidshewi
l
lleaveyou.”
“
Wenamonay
ouwoul
dn’
tunder
stand.
”
“
Yahno,Idon’
tunder
stand.Seey
out
omor
row
mor
ning.
”
“
Shar
p.”
Mothusiwalkedawaywiththepl
asti
candwentto
hi
shousewher ehecleanedupabitprepar
ingf
or
Sel
etso’
svisit
.

*
**

Seletsowal
kedwi t
hhercoll
eaguefr
om t
he
preschool
,thei
rhandbagsonthei
rshoul
der
s.
“
Iam sot
ir
ed.Ij
ustwantt
osl
eep.
”
Sel
etsosi
ghed.“
Met
oo.AndIam sohungr
y.”
Hercol
leaguel
ookedather
.“Youhav
ebeengai
ning
l
atel
y.
”
Sel
etsol
aughed.“
What
?”
“Youhavebeengai
ning.Andy
oueatmor
ethany
ou
usedto.Youar
epregnant.
”
Sel
etsoshookherhead.“
Iam not
.Iam j
usthappy
.”
“
Youar
epr
egnantSel
etso.Ther
eisnoneedt
oli
e.I
knowapr
egnantwomanwhenIseeone.
”
“Aiino,
thi
sti
mey
ou’
vegoti
tal
lwr
ong.Iam not
pregnant.
”
“
Osur
e?”
“
100%.
”
“Ok.Ihopeforyoursakeyouar
enot.Kanay
oucan’
t
keepgetti
ngpregnantwit
heachguyyoumeet.
”
“
Laone,
Iam notpr
egnant
!”
“Youar ealwaysindeni
althenendupabor t
ingwhen
therelati
onshipdoesn’
twork.Ij
ustwantyout obe
carefulthi
stimearound.Youcan’tkeepgett
ing
pregnantandabor t
ing.
”
“
Iam notpr
egnant
.Mot
husi
andIar
ecar
eful
.”
Laonesmi l
ed.“Ok,
Iam justl
ookingoutf oryou.I
don’twantyoumaki ngt
hesamemi stakeyoumade
withTshepo,youboughthim hi
sproper t
y,got
pregnantandonlyforhi
mt odumby ou.”
Ataxi st
oppedt henSelet
solaughedjumpingin.
“BathongLala!Iam goingtotheranktocoll
ectmy
parcelfr
om Gabor one.SeeyouonMonday .”
“
Shar
p.”
Thet
axi
drov
eof
fasSel
etsot
ext
edherboy
fri
end.
Selet
so:Heybabe,Iam goi
ngt otakemypar
celfr
om
therankthenIwi
ll
comet here.Ihavesomet
hingt
o
tel
lyou.
Mot
husi
immedi
atel
ycal
l
edherback.
“
Heybabe…”
“
Hey,Iam goingtother
ankbutIwi
l
lbecomi
ng
t
her
eaf t
er.Ihavenewsfory
ou.”
“
Ok.
”
“
Didt
hef
ri
dgear
ri
ve?
”
“
Yes.Thanksbabe.
”
“
Iwi
l
lseey
ousoon.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Shehungupthenawhil
elat
ershewassteppi
ngout
oft
hetaxi
.Shewentt
othebuseswhereshegother
par
cel
.Agirl
walkedt
owardsherandsmi
led.
“
Dumel
ang…”
Sel
etsosmi
l
ed.“
Hi.HowcanIhel
pyou.
”
Shechuckl
edsof
tl
y.“
Ithi
nkIam l
ost
.”
Sel
etsol
aughed.“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“Letmeshowyouthedi
rect
ions.
”Shet
ookouther
phoneandshowedhert
hemessage.Sel
etsosmil
ed.
“
Arey
ousur
ethesear
ethedi
rect
ions?
”
“
Yes.
”
“Wow!Ok.YouandIar
egoi
ngt
othesamepl
ace.
Sameyard.
”
“
Real
l
y?”
“
Yes.Myboyf
ri
endandIst
ayint
hisy
ard.Let
’sgo.
Wherear
eyoucomingf
rom?”
“
Shakawe.
”
“Oh…haveyoueaten?Iam get
ti
ngahotdog.Iam
sohungr
y.Icangetyouone.Don’twor
ry,
Iwil
lpay.
”
“
Uh…ok.Thanky
ousomuch.
”
“
Byt
hewayI
’
m Sel
etso.
”
“
Kenny
,shor
tforKenei
l
we.
”
“
Oh,
nice.Come.
”
Theygott
hehotdogsthenwal
kedt
othetaxi
’
s.They
goti
noneaft
erSelet
sospoket
othedr
iver
.
“
Sowhoar
eyouher
etosee?
”
Kennychewedgett
ingreadytoanswerthen
Sel
etso’
sphonerang.Sheli
ckedherl
ipsanswer
ing
hersi
ster
’scal
l
..
“
Ame…”
“Iwanttotal
ktoyou.Ihear
dyouar
edat
ingt
hatt
all
skinnyboy
.Isitt
rue?
”
“
Amepl
ease…”
“Selet
so,Ican’
thandleyoualmostdyi
ngagai
n
becauseofst r
ess.Ihopeyouarenotdoi
ngyour
usualthi
ngs.Kantewhydoy oualwaysdat
ethi
s
type?”
“
Hei
sdi
ff
erent
.”
“
Theyar
eal
way
sdi
ff
erent
!”
“
Thi
sti
mear
ound,
it’
sdi
ff
erentIswear
.”
“
Yourpr
obl
em i
syouf
orgety
our
sel
fev
eryt
imey
ou
geti
nar el
ati
onship.Yougetsoconsumedbyaman,
andnextthi
ngyouar epayi
ngdebtsandyouar
e
abor
ti
ngbabies.”
“
It
’sdi
ff
erentt
hist
imear
ound.Cany
oubehappyf
or
me?”
“
Theprobl
em isyouar
ejustt
ooni
ce.Andwheny
ou
f
all
inl
ove,youfal
li
ntoodeep.
”
Thecal
lcutt
henSel
etsol
aughed.“
Youar
esopr
ett
y.
Wearealmostt
her
e.”
“
Ok.
”
Kennyateherhotdogthenthetaxifi
nal
lystopped.
Sel
etsopai
df orbot
hoft hem t
hentheystar
ted
walki
ngdownt hest
reet.Theyfi
nal
l
ywal kedthrough
agate.
“
Wear
eher
e,whoar
eyouher
eforagai
n?”
“
Mot
husi
.”
Sel
etsopausedt
hensmi
l
ed.“
Arey
ouhi
ssi
ster
?”
“
Ma?
”
“
Comecome.
”
Kennyfoll
owedSel
etsopassi
ngtwohousesthen
fi
nal
lyr
eachedtheroom att
heback.Sheopenedthe
doorwalki
ngin.
“
Babe,
lookwho’
sher
e!”
Kennywal
kedinbehindherandlookedatMothusi
whowaslayingonthebed.Hecoughedjumpingoff
thebedal
mostfall
i
ng.Confused,Kennywat
chedas
Selet
soki
ssedMothusi.
“
Int
roduceusbabe…I
sity
oursi
ster
?”
Mothusi
lookedatKennyt henbackatSelet
sowho
wassmili
ng.“Uhhyes…that’smysist
er.UhhKenny
,
t
hisismygirl
fri
end.Sel
etso.”
Kennyf
rozest
ari
ngathi
m whi
l
eherhear
tpounded.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#8

Sel
etsosmi
l
edput
ti
ngherhandbagandpar
cel
down.
“
Ifoundheratt
her
ank,
shewasl
ost
.”
Kennyswall
owedjustst
ari
ngathi
m,Mot
husi
for
ced
asmile.“
UhIfor
gotshewascoming.
”
“
Ifi
gur
ed.Si
tKenny
.Puty
ourbagdown.
”
Tearsfi
ll
edKenny’
sey eswhil
eherli
pstrembl
ed.She
tookadeepbreathtry
ingnottocrybutawayward
tearr
oll
eddownhercheek.Seletsowalkedov
eras
Kennyrubbedhertear.
“
Puty
ourbagdownl
ove.Iwi
l
lst
artcooki
ng.
”
SheputKenny
’sbagdown.
“
Sitont
hebed.
”
KennylookedatMothusiwhoswall
owedlooki
ng
backather.Shesl
owlysatdown,t
henextbusback
toShakawewasdepar t
ingtomor
rowmorningand
that
’swhenshecouldonlyl
eave.
“
Arey
oucr
ying?Ar
eyouok?
”
Kennywi
pedhercheeks.“
Iam f
ine.
”
Sel
etsosmi
l
ed.“
Ok.Letmecook.
”
Seletsoswi t
chedontheradi
oandst ar
tedplay
ing
Brandy ,r
ighther
esingi
ngalongwhil
ecooking.
Mot husigotbusyonhisphone.Kenny’
sphone
vi
brat edthensheopenedthetextf
rom Mothusi.
Mot
husi
:Icanexpl
ain.
Kennylookedathi
m andsatst
il
lthenhesent
anothermessage.
Mothusi:
Whydi dn’
tyoutel
lmey ouwerecomi
ng?
Youjustdon’
trockupfrom nowhere.
Kennyst
oodup.“Iam goi
ngt
osi
tout
side,
Iam not
feel
i
ngtoowel
l.
”
Sel
etsol
ookedather
.“What
’swr
ong?
”
“
Ithi
nki
t’
ssi
tt
ingt
oomuch.
”
“
Ohy
eah…Iwi
l
lcal
lyouoncef
oodi
sready
.”
Kennywalkedoutwit
hherphone.Shemadesever
al
cal
lbackstoThabangwhoimmedi at
elycal
l
edher
back.
“
Hey
…”
Kennytookadeepbreat
hwal
ki
ngtotheback.“
Why
di
dn’ty
out el
lmether
ewassomeoneel
se?”
“Iam sor
ryKenny
.Idi
dn’
tthi
nki
twasthatser
ious.
ButatthesametimeIj
ustwant
edyoutoseefor
yoursel
f.
”
“Thepainfulparti
sthatIdon’
tknowany
oneel
se
expecthim here.”
“
Iam sor
ry.Iwil
lcomeandtakeyoutotherank
t
omorrowmor ni
ng.Youdeser
vebett
er.That’
sal
lI
want
edyout osee.”
“
Whoar
eyout
alki
ngt
o?”
Kennyquickl
yhungupandt
urnedt
oMot
husi
put
ti
ng
herphoneinherpocket
.
“
Soy
ouhav
erepl
acedme?
”
“
Whatdoy
ouexpectKenny
?Ihav
eneedst
oo.
”
Tearsfi
ll
edherey
es.“
Soy
oudeci
dedt
ojustst
art
cheati
ng?”
“Sheishelpi
ngyousati
sfyneedsyouobviousl
ycan’
t
sati
sfy.Idoever
ythi
ngforyouyetyoucan’tev
endo
asinglethi
ngforme.Ialwayshavetobebegging
youKenny !
”
Thegatefloodsopened.“
Idon’twantthi
s
rel
ati
onshi
pany more.Iam br
eakingupwithy
ou.
Youdon’tdeserv
eme. ”
“Idon’
tdeser
vey ou?Whydidn’
tyousayany t
hing
whenIwasbuy ingyouthi
ngs?Youlookthewayy ou
arelooki
ngbecauseofme!Younev erseem t
o
compl ai
nwhenIgiveyoumoney.”
“
Idi
dn’
tfor
cey
out
ogi
vememoney
!”
“Butyouneverrefusedi
tdidn’ty
ou?Youmustbe
stupidt
ot hi
nkyoucanj ustbr
eakupwi t
hmel ike
thataft
ereveryt
hingIhavedonef oryou.Selet
sois
heretodowhaty oucan’tdo,andf oraslongasy ou
can’tdothat
,thenshewi l
lfor
everbet here.
”
“
It
’sov
er!
”
“
Andwhowouldeverwantyou?Yourgr
andmot
heris
awit
chKenny
.Iam theonlyper
sonwhohasever
l
ookedaty
ouandacceptedyou.
”
“Iam br eakingupwi thy ouandIam goi ngtogot o
universi ty.Iam goingt ogetadegr ee, getagoodj ob,
getamanwhodeser vesmeandl i
v et heli
feyoucan
neverl ive.Youwi l
lonlydream ofi t.Youdon’ t
deserv eme, Iwaswayabov ey out obegi nwi t
h.You
arear et ar dedmanwhocoul dn’ tev enpassany
singlesubj ectinhislif
e,aftertwor et akes,youare
stil
ldumb!Iam nott hesmar testoutt herebutIam
defini
t elysmar t
erthany ou.Yourf at herisri
ghtabout
you, youar eaf ai
lureandf orevery ouwi llbeaf ai
l
ure.
Yout hi nkIcar ethaty oukeepi ngSel etso?Idon’ t
care.Yoursexi snotev ent hatgoodany way.Your
dickissmal ltoo,anyoneev ert oldy out hat?”
“
Sonowy
ouar
eadi
ckexpect
?Youar
eawhor
e.”
Kennylaughed.“Idon’thavetobeadi ckexpectto
knowy ouhaveat inydog’sdick!Andtopofthat,
y ou
can’
tev enuseit
.Ihav eneverhadsexbef or
ebutI
knowIwassupposedt ofeel
somet hi
ng,something
youdidn’tmakemef eel
!Youar eusel
essand-“
Mothusir
aisedhishandandsl
appedKennyacross
t
hef acet
hatherwholecheekbur
nt.Angerf
il
ledher
vei
nsasshel ookedathi
m.
“
Sayt
hatagai
n!Youoweme.
”
Heki ssedher,Kennybi thisli
pst hathequickl
y
steppedback, angril
y,shegrabbedhi shandand
sankhert eethintohisfingerbit
inghi m sohar
dhe
yell
edscr eamingwhi l
eki cki
ngher ,Shebithi
m ev
en
harder,thepainwast oomucht heni nsidet
hehouse,
Seletsoputthev olumedown.Kennyl etgoand
kickedhim betweenhi slegs.
“
Puty
ourhandsonmeagai
nandIwi
l
lski
nyou!
”
Mothusistr
aight
enedupasSel
etsowal
kedov
er
hol
dinghisbreat
hatthepai
n.
“
Ever
ythi
ngok?
”
Mothusit
urnedbackt
oSel
etso.“
Yeah,
mysi
steri
s
f
unny.”
Kennywipedawayhertear
swi
tht
hebackofher
hand.Sel
etsosmi
led.
“
Ok,
foodi
sal
mostr
eady
.Comei
nandeat
.”
Shetur
nedandwalkedbacki
nsi
det
hehouse.Kenny
l
ookedatMothusi
.
Tear
sbur
ntherey
est
henshepi
ckedabr
ick.“
Ify
ou
tryitagain, Iam goingt ot
ellherafterIsmashy our
head.Yout hi nkIam stupi
dr i
ght?”Tear srol
leddown
hercheeks.“ Iam stupidri
ght?Kennyt hestupidgirl
,
thisisthel astt i
meIam st upidbeforey oureyesy ou
hearme?Iwi ll
neverbestupidagainy ouhearme?I
l
ov edy ou.Il ovedyouf oryou.Youdi dn’thavetogi v
e
memoneyf ormet oloveyou.Youdi dn’thavetodo
any t
hingf ormesot hatIl
ovey ou.I
fy out hi
nkyou
willputyourhandsonme, thi
nkagai n.”
“
Iam sor
ry.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“Idon’
tlovey ou!Idon’
t.Iam goi
ngt omeet
someoneIdeser veandhewi l
lhaveadegreeanda
goodjob.Hewi ll
beaf armuchbet t
ermanthanyou
canev erbe.SticktoSelet
sobecausey ouhav
elost
met houghy oudon’tdeservehertoo.”
Shedroppedt
hebri
ckandwalkedinsi
det
hehouse.
Sel
etsosmil
edhandi
ngheraplat
e.
“
Soar
eyougoi
ngt
oschool
?”
Kennyshookherhead.“
No.Noty
et.Iam goi
ngt
o
uni
versi
tyi
nAugust.
”
“
Whatar
eyougoi
ngt
ost
udy
?”
“
Iam st
il
ldebat
ingbutIwantt
odoi
nter
iordesi
gn.
”
“That’
sgood.”Seletsosatbesi dehersmi li
ng.“You
canev endoy ourowni fyoudon’ tgetajob.Iam a
preschoolt
eacher ,
Istudiedear l
ychi l
dhood
educationwhilemypeer sdi dbigthingsandt oday
theyareathomeandnnaIam wor ki
ng.Nott hat
thereisanyt
hingwr ongwi thdoingbi gdegrees,but
somet i
mesy ou’vegottot hi
nkoutoft hebox.”
“
Yeah…someoneoncet
oldmet
hat
.”
“Thatpersonwasright.Tomorr
owIam goingformy
bakingcl
asses,youshouldcomewi t
h,If
eelyouand
Iwil
l bemuchcloserthananyoneIam cl
osewith.
”
KennylookedatMothusi
walki
ngi
nandsmi
l
edat
Sel
etso.“Thatwoul
dbenice.
”
“Iam sor
ryther
eisnoTV.Ilongt ol
dyourbrothert
o
getone,hesaysheissti
l
lsaving.Butmylaptopis
here.Wecanwat chsomemov ies.”
“
BabeIam sur
eKennyi
sti
red.Andshewant
sto
r
est
.”
Sel
etsol
aughedt
henwhi
sper
ed.“
Hemust
ov
erpr
otect
iveofy
ou.Youar
esopr
ett
y,okar
e
Meki
aCox.”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Heisj
ust
…fi
ne.Howl
onghav
eyou
twobeen…uhhdati
ng?
”
“Eversincehecame.Ir eallylovehi
m andwear e
expecti
ng.Ihaven’ttol
dhi my et
.Hopeful
lyt
hisi
sit
.I
am tir
edofgetti
nghur tov erandov eragai
n.Thi
s
ti
mear oundIwillkil
lmy self.
”
Kennyl
ookedatthet
earsi
nSelet
so’
sey
est
hen
smil
ed.“
Itwon’
t.Hel
ovesyou.
”
Sel
etsogi
ggl
ed.“
Yeah.Eat
…”

*
**

Awhi l
el ater,Kennyl ai
dont hefloorwithafleece
overher ,thelightsoff.Shestil
lcouldn’
tbel
ievewhat
washappeni ngwashappeni ng.Shewant edt ocry
outsol oudatt hepainshewasf eeli
ngbutshe
couldn’tletSel et
sohearher .Shesilent
lycr
ied,tear
s
droppingont hepi l
l
owwhi leli
steningtothe
whisper
sandmovement
shappeni
ngonthebed.No
onehadeverpr
epar
edherf
orthepai
nshewas
feel
ing.

*
**

Mothusipul
ledSelet
so’
spant
ytot
hesi
det
henshe
pushedoffhishand.
“
Stopi
t…y
oursi
steri
sher
e.”
“
Shei
ssl
eepi
ng.
”
“
Wear
eint
hesamer
oom.St
op.
”
Hepul
l
edhercl
oserpul
l
ingherpant
ytot
hesi
de
t
henhesl
i
dinfr
om behi
nd.
“
Stop…”
“
Shhh…”
Hestart
edt
hrust
ingf
rom behi
ndwhi
l
eSel
etsot
ri
ed
keepi
ngqui
et.
*
**

Meanwhi l
eont hefl
oor,Kennypressedherhandto
hermout hcr
ying.Nowshewassur etheywere
havi
ngsex.Shecoul dhearthei
rheav ybr
eaths.She
connectedherearphonestoherphoneandpl ugged
them i
nherear spl
ayingasong.

*
**

Selet
somoanedsoftl
yasMothusist
artedthr
ust
ing
evenmoredeeperandfast
erwhi
legrunti
ng.

Thefoll
owingmorning,Thabangsteppedoutofthe
taxi
andcalledKenny.Thephonerangf oracoupl
e
ofsecondsthenKennyf i
nal
lyanswered.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,Iam her
e.Let
’sgo.
”
“
Ok.Iam comi
ng.
”
Shehungupt
henhesi
ghedwai
ti
ng.

*
**

I
nsidethehouse,KennygotupasMot
husi
lookedat
her
, Sel
etsost
il
lsl
eeping.
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“
It
’snonofy
ourbusi
ness.Iam l
eav
ing.
”
“Youarenotgoi
ngany
wher
e.Whom doy
ouknow
here?
”
Kennyputonhershoeswhil
eSelet
sowokeup.She
fr
ownedstar
ingatKennyputt
ingonhershoes.
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“
Afr
iendi
sher
etopi
ckmeup.
”
“
Why
?Ther
eismuchspaceher
e.”
“
Iknow.Iwi
l
lcomeback.
”
“Iam r
eall
ysadthatyouar
eleav
ing.Weshoul
d
exchangenumbers.
”
Kennygav eherhernumbert
henunlockedthedoor
walkingoutwhil
eMi t
husi
fol
lowedbehindher.She
walkedtothegatewhereThabangwaswai t
ingwith
thetaxi.
Mothusif
rownedasThabangopenedthedoorfor
Kenny.“
Soyouarethewhobroughtherher
e?”
“
Shewant
edt
osur
pri
sey
ou.Idi
dn’
tbr
ingher
.”
“
Kennysoy
ouar
efucki
ngmyf
ri
end?
”
Kennysati
nthetaxi
,angr
il
yMot husi
char
gedat
Thabangwhoclosedthedooranddodgedthepunch
fr
om Mothusi
.
“PutyourhandsonmeandseewhatIwi lldotoy
ou.
Idon’
twantt ofi
ghtwit
hy ou.Youruinedthis
rel
ati
onshipall
byyoursel
f.Iwil
lnotletyoudowhat
youwantt odotoher.Sheisinnocent.
”
“
Ithoughtwewer
efr
iends.
”
“
Iwon’
tassociat
emysel
fwi
tht
hel
i
kesofy
ouand
y
ouhavelosther.
”
“
Soy
ouwantmygi
rl
fr
iendl
ait
aka?
”
“
Bye.
”
“Gaoodir
esent
lel
ait
aka,
youknowhowIf
eel
about
Kenny
.”
“Idon’
tknow.It
houghty
oul ovedherbutIseeyou
aresetondestr
oyi
ngherli
fe.Sel
etsoiswalki
ng
over.
”
Mothusitur
nedtoSelet
soasThabanggotint
hetaxi
whi
cht hendrov
eoff.Pai
ncloggedhi
sthr
oatashe
t
ri
edtoswal l
owwatchingthetaxi
dri
veof
f.
Sel
etsot
ouchedhi
shand.“
Arey
ouokbabe?
”
Henoddedt henwalkedbackt
ot hehouseast
he
thoughtofThabangandKennythreat
enedtoj
ustki
l
l
him.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#9

Thabangl
edKennyi
nsi
dehi
sbachel
orpadt
hen
si
ghed.
“
Iam real
lysor
ryaboutwhathappened.Icoul
dhave
t
oldyoubuthewouldhav esimplydeni
edit
.Ij
ust
want
edy outoseeforyoursel
f.
”
Kennynoddedtear
ful
l
y.“Iwantt
ogoback.Ther
eis
amorningbusbacktoShakawe.
”
“
Ok.Youcant
akeabat
hthenIwi
l
ltakey
out
othe
r
ank.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Arey
ouok?
”
“
Iwi
l
lbef
ine.
”
Thabangwalkedoverandheldherhands.“
Youcan’t
cryforaguyli
keMothusi.Youdeser
vesomuch
bett
erthanwhathecanev ergi
veyou.Heactual
l
y
wantedtogetyoupregnantsothaty
oudon’tgoto
uni
ver
sit
y.”
“
Idi
dn’
tsl
eepwi
thhi
m.”
“
Doy
our
eal
l
ylov
ehi
m?”
“Ido,butIwil
lgetoveri
tandmov eonwi t
hmylife.
Hei snotthefi
rsthumanbei ngtodi
sappointme,I
willbefi
ne.Hesleptwithhisgir
lf
ri
endwhi l
eIwasin
thesamer oom.Iguessi tgoestoshowwhathehad
formel ongended.”Shetookadeepbr eathwi
ping
awayat ear.
Hehuggedher.“That
’sdisr
espect
ful
.Iam r
eal
l
y
sor
ry.Youarebeauti
ful
andy oudon’
tdeser
vehow
hei
st r
eati
ngyou.”
Shesnif
fedtaki
ngast epbackthenThabanglooked
athersoint
entl
y,Kennylookeddown.Heclearedhi
s
thr
oat.
“Youcangoandt akeabath.
”Hepoi ntedatthe
bathroom.Shenoddedthenpickedherbagand
disappear
edtothebathr
oom.St i
lli
nhisfil
li
ng
stati
onunif
orm,Thabangwentt ohiskit
chenand
fri
edheraf ewt
hings.Hi
sphoner angfrom his
pocketashedishedforheri
nawhi teplate.He
pi
ckedt
hecal
lcl
eani
ngupt
hesi
desoft
hepl
ate.
“
Yah?
”
“Iam comi
ngther
e.Kennyi
smygirlandwhat
happensbet
weenherandIisnonofyourbusi
ness.
”
“I
t’
snotbutKennyismybusi
nessnow.She
deservesbet
tert
hanyout
ryi
ngtodestr
oyher
dreamsandhopes.St
ickt
oSelet
so,akereeneshei
s
mat ur
e.”
“
Otsi
l
egony
elal
ait
aka.
”
“
Comef
orherandy
ouhav
emet
odeal
wit
h.”
Thabanghungupj ustasKennywal kedfrom the
bathr
oom, nowinadr ess.Helookedatherbraids
thenherbeaut
if
ulface.Itseemedev er
ythingabout
herwasjustper
fect.Heswal l
owedner v
ously.
“Imadebr
eakfast
.Youneedt
oeat
.Thej
our
neyt
o
Shakawei
slong.”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Hehandedhert hepl
ateandpouredtheorangej
uice
i
nhisfr
idge.Kennysatdowneating.Feel
i
nghiseyes
onher
,sheraisedherheadandlookedathim.
“
What
?”
Heshookhi sheadthensighed.“
Ij ustwishy ouknew
howbeaut i
fulyouare,
youdon’tdeser v
et obei n
suchaposi t
ionandIam happyy ouchosey our
sani
tyoveramanwhodoesn’ tknowhowt olovey ou
ri
ght.Youcanhav eanymany ouwantandt hereisa
manoutt herewhowi l
ltr
eatyoulikethequeeny ou
are.
”
“Iam goi
ngtofocusonmyst
udi
es.Iwantt
obe
someonebig.”
Thabangsmi
l
edsitt
ingbesideher.“
Nodoubtyou
wil
lbecomet
hatperson.Ihopethefoodi
sok.
”
Shesmiled.“
It
’sf
ine.Thanky
ousomuch.For
ever
ythi
ng.”
“
It
’sok.Youshoul
dknowIwi
l
lal
way
sbet
her
efor
y
ouwheny ouneedme.”
Helookedatherlipsandwi t
hhishear tpounding,
l
eanedoverandki ssedher.Themai ndooropened
thenMothusiwalkedin.Kennyquicklyjumpedback,
herhear
tpoundingwhi l
ehermi ndtri
edpr ocessing
whathadjusthappened.Shockandangert ookov er
Mot
husi
’
sfaceasThabanggotupt
ofacehi
m.
“
Soy
ouar
enowf
ucki
ngmygi
rl
fr
iendThabang?
”
“
Let
’st
alkout
side.
”
“
Isawy
ouki
ssi
ngmygi
rl
fr
iend!
”
“Kennyi
snolongeryourgir
lf
ri
end,y
oulostheras
soonasyoustar
tedthatrel
ati
onshi
pwithSelet
so.
Youcan’
thaveyourbreadbatter
edatbothsi
des.”
Losingit,Mothusi chargedatThabangandpunched
hi
m.Thabangl osthisbalanceandt heybothcrushed
onhi sglasscof f
eet abl
e.Kennyj umpedbackasi t
broket opieces,herhear tpoundingsomuchi twas
vi
brating.Mot husipunchedThabangwhopushed
hi
m of fhim andgotupst agger
ing.Mothusipunched
Thabangagai nthathef ellonhisplasmaknockingit
off.
“
Mot
husi
stopi
t!
”
Wit
hhisangert akingt
otal contr
olofhi
sthinki
ng,
MothusipunchedThabangev enmor ewhil
eKenny
scr
eamedt ryi
ngt ogetthem toseparat
e.Shewent
andgrabbedMot husi’
st-shirt
,angr
il
yMothusitur
ned
andpushedherof
fbr
eat
hingf
ir
e.
“Soyouar
enowbusywit
hmyfri
ends?Want
wael
a
Kenny,
youcheatonmewit
hmyfri
end?
”
“
Webr
okeup.
”
“
YouandIwi
llnev
erbreakup.Thedaywebr
eakup
i
swhenoneofusisdead.”
Thabanggotupt henpulledMot husiandpunched
him.Theystart
edexchangi ngfists,losingthefi
ght,
Mot husi
wenttot hekit
chenwher ehecameback
withtheknif
eandwi thouthesitation,stabbed
Thabangont hechest.Kennygr abbedherbagand
rushedtothebathroom locki
ngher selfinthenwit
h
shakinghands,call
edthepolice.

*
**

I
nThabang’
sliv
ingr
oom, Mot
husist
abbedhi
mt wi
ce
mor
ethengotupbreat
hingheav
il
ywhil
eThabang
l
ayi
nhisblood.
“
Kenny
!”
Hewalkedtot
hebat hr
oom andt
ri
edopeni
ngt
he
doorbuti
twaslocked.
“Imighthav
ehur
tyoubuttokissmyfri
end?Youare
nothi
ngbutawhoreandIam goingt
omakey oupay.
Iam goingt
oki
ll
you.Comeout !
”Hebangedthe
door.

*
**

I
nsidethebathroom,Kennyputherhandov erher
mouthtryi
ngt onotscream.Hestartedhi
tti
ngthe
doorwithsomet hi
ng,shemov edbackshakingwit
h
fear
.Forallsheknew, hecoul
djuststabhertodeat
h.
“
Iam goi
ngt
okil
lyou.Youarenotgoi
ngt
ohi
de
f
orev
er.Want
waelaKenny.
”
Kenny
’sphonest
art
edr
ingi
ngt
hensheanswer
ed.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“HeyKenny,soIwaswonderi
ngi
fwecouldgotomy
baki
ngclassestoget
heri
fyouar
est
il
lar
ound.”
“Iam atThabang’shouseSeletso.Mot husiand
Thabanghadaf i
ghtandMot husistabbedThabang.
Pleasecome, Iam scar
ed.Ihav ecall
edt hepol
ice.
”
“
Iam comi
ng.
”
Mothusi st
oppedbangingandspokewhi l
ehi svoi
ce
shook.“IknowImessedup.Iam sor r
y,Thabangis
myf r
iendKenny .Youcan’
tcheatonmewi t
hhim.I
wil
ldumbSel etso.Pl
easeopenthisdoor.Let’
sgo
home.”
Kennykeptqui
et.
“Il
ovey ou.Ilovey
ousomuch.Il etmylov
eforsex
gettomyhead.Wi t
hSeletsoitdoesn’
tmean
anythi
ng.Keagor ataKenny.Pleasecomeout.We
wil
lfixthi
ngs.Iwil
lfi
xmy self
.Iam sorr
yfor
everyt
hing,forhur
ti
ngyou.Cany ousaysomething.
”
“
Ical
l
edt
hepol
i
ce.
”

*
**

Out
sidet
hebat
hroom,
Mot
husi
’
stear
sfi
l
ledhi
sey
es.
Itwasn’
tjustl
osi
nghernowbutact ual
lylosi
ngher
toThabang.Thabangwasgenerall
yagoodguy ,he
couldn’
tseenoreasonwhyKennywoul dsaynot o
him.Thabangactual
lyhadadegreejustthathe
couldn’
tfi
ndajobthatneededhi
squal i
fi
cati
ons.He
puthishandsonhisphoneasreali
tykickedin.
“Kennykeagokopa,
pleasecomeout
.Iam sor
ry.I
didyouwrong,
Iwil
lbreakupwit
hher
.”
Shekeptqui
et.Hewalkedbacktothesit
ti
ngroom
whereThabangwasst i
l
lly
ingwhil
einapoolof
bl
ood.Helookedaroundthenwalkedoutj
ustasthe
pol
icecardr
ovein.
Heswal
l
owedhar
dst
ari
ngatt
hepol
i
ceof
fi
cer
s
wal
ki
ngovert
ohi
m.
“
Mor
ena!
”
“
Dumel
ang.
”
“Wehav
erecei
vedacal
l.Apparent
lyther
eisaf
ight
goi
ngonandsomeonegotstabbed.”
Mothusil
ookeddownasat
eardr
opped.“
Yeah…my
f
ri
end..
”
ThepolicewalkedinsideandlookedatThabangwho
wasont hefl
oor .Kennywalkedoutandsighedwi
th
rel
i
ef.ShelookedatThabangl yingonhi
sownpool
ofblood.
“
Mot
husi
stabbedhi
m.Pl
easehel
phi
m!”
Thepoli
ceoffi
cerputhisfi
ngersonhi
sneckthen
l
ookedathiscoll
eague.“Cal
ltheambul
ance.Weare
arr
est
ingthi
sone.”
Theycuf
fedMothusi
whowasst ari
ngather
.He
openedhi
smouthtosaysomethingbutt
henlooked
awayasthepol
i
cedraggedhi
mt othevan.

*
**

Tshenolot r
yingcall
ingKennyagainbutshewasn’t
picki
ng.Shet ookadeepbr eathstar
ingatherphone
tearful
ly
.Inthepr i
vacyofherroom,sheputher
handsonherf acecryi
ng.Shecouldalreadysee
herselfremainingbehindwhil
eotherswentto
universi
ty.Godknewshehadwor kedsohar dtogo
t
otheUniv
ersit
yofBot
swanaandthethoughtofal
l
t
hathar
dwor kgoi
ngdownthedr
ainhurtherso
much.
Shelookedatherphoneagai
nthendi
aledThabo.
Hisphonerangforawhil
e.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hi.I
t’
sTshenol
o.”
“
Didn’
tIt
ell
yout
ost
ayawayf
rom me?
”
“
Youdi
dbutIam pr
egnant
.Iwantt
oabor
t.
”
“
Who’
spr
egnancyi
sit
?”
“It
’syours.Ionl ysleptwi
thyou.IfIgi
vebir
th,
Iam
goingtocl aim chil
dsupportanddestroywhatev
er
remainsar eleftofy ourmarr
iage.Iwi
llt
ell
thepoli
ce
youev enst art
edsl eepi
ngwithmebef or
eIwas18.
Youwi ll
got ojail
.”
“
Howmuchdoy
ouwant
?”
“
P800.
”
“Iwil
lsenditt
henyoust
ayawayf
rom me.Younev
er
call
mef rom t
her
eon.”
“
Yes.
”
Thabohungupt henTshenol
olookedatherphone
anxiousl
y.Minut
eslat
erthemoneyhadbeen
transf
err
ed.Shejumpedupanddownhappi l
ythen
thedooropenedandhermotherwalkedin.
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Not
hing.
”
“
Ok,Iam goi
ngout
.Iam goi
ngt
omeett
hechur
ch
l
adi
es.”
“
Ok.
”
Shewal kedoutthenTshenol
owai t
edforacoupleof
minutesbeforewalki
ngout.Shetookoutherphone
andcalledanothernumbershehadgottenfr
om
facebook.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hi.Isawt
haty
ouar
eabor
ti
onpi
l
ls.
”
“
Yes,
doy
ouwant
?”
“
YesbutIam i
nShakawe.
”
“
Ihav
eanagentt
her
e.Hewi
l
lgi
vey
ou.
”
“
Ok,
Ineedt
hem asi
nnow.
”
“
Ok.Iwi
l
lcal
lhi
mimmedi
atel
y.
”
“
Howdoesi
twor
k?”
“
Youwi
llj
usthavetodri
nkonepi
llt
henputt
heot
her
i
nsi
dey
ourvagina.Howfarar
eyou?”
“
Aboutt
womont
hsmay
be.
”
“Ok.I
ny ourcasey
oumi
ghtbl
eedbutnott
hatmuch.
Thepil
lsareP750.”
“
Ok.Iwantt
hem now.
”
“
Ok.Hewi
l
lcal
lyouj
ustnow.
”
Tshenolohungupandsi
ghedalmostr
eli
eved.She
thought
ful
lycal
l
edKennyandthi
sti
mear oundshe
answered.
“
Nol
o,Iam-
“
“
LeaveitKenny
.Todayyouhav eshownmewhata
f
akefri
endyouare.Thi
sf r
iendshi
pisonesi
dedso
maybeweshouldbreakitup.”
“
Nol
oIam-
“
“Iam goi
ngt
obl
ockanddel
etey
ournumber
.Iam
done.
”
Tshenol
ohungupt
henbl
ockedKenny
’snumber
.

Atthemall
,aguywal
kedovertoherweari
nga
hoodi
eandamaskov erhi
sface.Hehandedhert
he
bl
ackplast
ic.
“
Inser
toneinyourv
agi
nathendr
inkt
heot
her
.You
wil
lst
artbl
eedi
ngsoonaf
ter.
”
Tshenolotooktheplasti
candlookedi
nsidet
hen
tookoutthecashandhandedi ttohi
m.Hequickl
y
walkedawaydisappearingbet
weencars.Shegota
taxibackhomewi t
ht hepil
l
s.
*
**
Backatherhouse,shel
ockedhersel
finherroom
thendrankonepi
ll
andinsert
edtheotherinsi
deher
vagina.

*
**
Keat
aret
sishookherheadt
alki
ngt
oPeggy
.
“
Ican’
tbel
i
eveshei
spr
egnant
.”
“YouseewhatItol
dy ou?Weshoul
dhav
elong
sort
edthatgi
rlout
.”
“
Soy
ousayt
hismani
sgenui
ne?
”
“Kea,
whydoy outhi
nkmyhusbandal
waysdoes
whatItel
lhi
mt odo?Whydoyouthi
nkhenever
cheat
s?Itwasthatman.Hei
smorethangenui
ne.
”
“Iwantthi
sl i
tt
legirl
tolosethepr
egnancy.Iwanther
tobleedforever.Shehastosuff
er.AndIalsowant
Thabotol ookatmeonl y.”
“
Iam comi
ngt
opi
cky
ouup.
”

*
**

Atthehospi
tal
,Kennyst
oodupast
hedoct
orwal
ked
over.
“
Isheok?
”
“
Whoar
eyou?
”
“
Hisf
ri
end.Wewer
etoget
herwhenhegotst
abbed.
I
sheok?”
Thedoctorsi
ghedst
ari
ngather
.“Hei
sfi
ne,
hej
ust
l
ostalotofbl
oodbutheisf
ine.
”
Sel
etsor
ushedov
erhol
dingherhandbagast
he
doct
orspoket
oKenny.
“
Ok,
canIseehi
m?”
“
Yes.Buthei
srest
ing.
”
“
Ok,
thanky
ou.
”
ThedoctorwalkedawaythenSel
etsosighed.“
Kenny,
pl
easetell
mewhat ’sgoi
ngon.Justtel
lmet hetr
uth.
Whatisgoingon?Ideser
v et
oknow.Please…”
.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#10

Kennyl
ookedi
nhereyest
hinki
ngofwhatSel
etso
hadtol
dherl
astni
ght
.Shetookadeepbreat
h.
“
Mot
husi
wasmyboy
fri
end.
”
Sel
etsof
rowned.“
Youar
enotsi
bli
ngs?
”
“
No,
wear
enot
.Butdon’
twor
ry.I
t’
sov
er.
”
“
Whydi
dyouagr
eet
obei
nghi
ssi
stert
hen?
”
“
Iwasshocked.
”
“
Aren’
tyout
ooy
oungf
orhi
m?”
Kennysighed.“ThereasonIdi
dn’
tsayanyt
hingis
becauseIreal
izedIhadnoneedt ohur
tyou.Youare
avict
iminthistoo.Iwasjustt
ryi
ngtohel
py ou.
”
Sel
etsol
ookedatKennyast
ear
sfi
l
ledherey
es.
“Wow…”
“
Iam sor
ry.Iam goi
ngt
oseeThabang.
”
Kennywal
kedt
oThabang’
sroom t
henl
ookedathi
m
sl
eepi
ng.
“
Thabang…”
Thabangsl
owl
ywokeupandl
ookedatKenny
.
“
Hey
…”
“
Thedoct
orsai
dyouar
efi
ne,
justl
otsomebl
ood.
”
Hebli
nkedacoupl
eofti
mes,
abandagear
oundhi
s
chest
.“Wher
eMothusi
?”
“Atthepoli
ce.Mothusiisyourfri
endtheref
orey ou
andIcannev erbe.EvenifIbreakupwithhim, Iwil
l
notstartarel
ati
onshipwithyoujusttohurthim
becauseIam notlikehi
m.Youshoul dhav enev er
kissedmeandhi m att
ackingyouwasj usthis
reacti
on.Heisnotav i
olentperson.
”
“
Heal
mostki
l
ledme.
”
“Becauseyoukissedme.Youcan’ tl
ethim gotoj
ail
becausehereactedinacertai
nway .Hehasa
gir
lf
riendwhoisexpect
ing.Pleasetel
lthepoli
cet
hat
hedidn’tmeantostabyou.”
“Ar
eyouli
steningtoy
our
sel
fri
ghtnowKenny
?Thi
s
guycanki
l
ly ou.”
“
Iam goingbackt oShakawe.Pl easedot herightf
ul
t
hing.Youarenotat r
uef r
iend,i
fy ouwer ehisreal
f
ri
endy ouwoul dhaveneverbeeney ei
ngme.The
l
eastyoucandoi sdot heright
ful t
hing.Iam going
t
ot hepol
icestati
onandIam goi ngtotellt
hem it
wasselfdefense.
”
“
Kenny
-“
“Fr
om thereIam goingtoblockyournumberand
del
eteit.Iappreci
ateal
lyouhavedoneformebut
nowIseey ouweredoingitf
oryourownbenefi
t,
unfor
tunatelywhatyouthoughtwouldhappenwi
ll
neverhappen.Iam notthatki
ndofperson.”
Hesi
ghed.“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Bye.
”
Thabangwatchedherwal
koutwhi
l
ehel
aidont
he
hospi
talbed.

*
**

Sel
etsost
oodupandl
ookedatMot
husi
ashe
wal
kedint
heoffi
ceshehadbeenwaiti
ngforhimin.
Thedet
ect
ivel
eanedbackstar
ingasshehugged
hi
m whi
lehewashandcuff
ed.
“
Iam sowor
ri
edabouty
ou.
”
Hesi
ghed.“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Shet
oldme.
”
“Il
ongwant
edt
obr
eakupwi
thherbutIdi
dn’
tknow
how.”
“
Iam pr
egnant
.”
Mot
husi
smi
l
ed.“
Real
l
y?”
Sel
etsonodded.“ Yes.Ir
eall
ywantt hi
st owork
Mothusibuti
fy oudon’tlov
emeori fyouarestil
li
n
l
ovewithKenny ,Iwouldunderstand.Sheisyoung
andbeauti
ful
.Ifthat’
swhaty ouwant ,pl
easeletme
go.Thi
stimeIwi llt
akemybr okenhear tqui
etl
yand
j
ustmov eon.Iam abi ggir
l.Idon’twantyoutohurt
meunnecessarilywheny oucanj ustl
etmego. ”
Helookedatt
hepai
ninherey
es.“
Ilov
eyou.Iwant
you.
”
“
WhataboutKenny
?”
“
Shei
sint
hepast
.”
“
Ok.Don’
tsayanyt
hing.Wewil
lgety
oual
awy
er.My
f
ri
end’
sboyfr
iendi
sal awy
er.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Thedetecti
venoddedthenthepoliceoff
icerwho
hadbroughthi
mt ookhim away.Selet
sowal kedout
ofthepoli
cestat
iondi
ali
ngKenny .Shehungup
star
ingatKennywalkoverholdi
ngherbag.
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”
“
Iam heretotr
yandhelpy ourboyfr
iend.Idon’twant
Mothusisononeedt ot
hinky ouhavetoprotectyour
r
elat
ionshi
pfr
om me.Idon’ tknowyoubutIt hink
youdeserv
ebetterbuti
t’
sy ourdeci
siontomake. ”
“
Ihopeyoumeanev
erywor dyouar
esay
ing.
Mothusi
andIar
eexpect
ing.
”
“
Congr
atul
ati
ons.
”
Kennywal
kedpastherent
eri
ngt
hepol
i
cest
ati
on.

*
**
I
nexcr uciat
ingpain,Tshenol
ol aidonherbed
grunti
ng.Shewasn’ tsureift
hepai nwassupposed
tobethismuchbuti twassoi ntense.Shegotup
thenwal kedtothekitchenwher eshedrankmor e
painki
ll
ers.Shewal kedbacktoherr oom asthepain
gotwor se.Thepainkill
ersdi
dn’tseem tobehelpi
ng.
Shet ookherphoneandt ri
edthenumberoft he
personshehadgot tenthepill
sf r
om buti
twasn’ t
getti
ngthroughanymor e.Sheclosedhereyescr y
ing.
Herbedr oom dooropenedthenhermot herwalked
i
n.Tshenol otookadeepbr eathwipi
nghert ear
sas
thepainslashedherabdomeni nt
oseveralhalv
es.
“
Whati
sgoi
ngon?
”
Sheshookherhead.Hermot
herl
ookedatt
hebl
ood
goi
ngdownherlegs.
“
Tshenol
o!”
Shebr
okedowncr
ying.
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?Tal
k!”
“
Igott
hepi
l
ls.Idon’
twantababy
.”
“Ngwanakewenaompont
saeng?(
Whatar
eyou
showi
ngme?)”
Tshenol
ogr
unt
edi
npai
n.“
Iam i
npai
n.”
“I
fyourfat
herfi
ndsout
…yoh!”Sheputherhandsi
n
herheaddefeat
edwhil
eTshenol
ocri
ed.
“
Iam scar
edmama…”
“
Ifpeopl
efi
ndout
…whathav
eyoudoneTshenol
o?!
”
“
Iwantt
ogot
oUB.
”
“
Youshouldhav
ethoughtaboutUBbefor
esleepi
ng
wi
thmarr
iedmen!Youshouldhavet
houghtofUB
t
hen.
”
Feel
i
ngweak,
Shesl
owl
ysatonherbedandl
aid
down.“
Hel
pme.”
“Ngng,getup!Getup!Youneedt ochangeandIam
taki
ngyoutothedoctor.Tshenol
oyouwi l
lki
l
lme
befor
eti
me!”
MmgaweTshenol
odr essedherdaught
erthen
wal
kedoutwi
thherandputheri nt
hecarbefor
e
dr
ivi
ngof
ftot
heprivatecli
nic.
*
**

Kennygoti
nsi
det hebusholdi
nghertickett
hensat
downwithasigh.Sheputonherearphonesand
pl
ayedasongclosinghereyes.Shesnappedher
eyesopenasherphonerang.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Wher
eismymoney
?”
Kennysmil
edst
ari
ngattheIDcal
l
er.“
Yousai
d
Chri
stmascomesonceayear.
”
Ar
onal
aughed.“
Ngng,
Ihav
erev
isi
tedt
hei
ssue.
Howar
eyou?”
“Iam onmybackt oshakawe.Ihadthoughtt
o
surpri
semyboy fr
iendt
henIgotsurpri
sedbyhisnew
pregnantgi
rl
fr
iend.”
“
Wedon’
tsur
pri
sepeopl
ethesedays.Yout
ell
them
y
ouar
ecoming.Howdidyounotknowthat
?”
“
Noonet
oldme.
”
“Youdon’tj
ustrockupatpeopl
e’
shouses,
youwi
l
l
dieyoung.ButIam sor
ry.
”
“
It
’sok.May
bei
twasj
ustnev
ermeantt
obe.
”
“
Obv
iousl
y.
”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Mxm…”
“
Howi
smygi
rl
?”
“Sheisfi
ne,
shewentforafuneral
.Shei
shavingan
episodet
here,
Iwishshecanjustcomebacksothat
Icanlookaf
terher.
”
“Whoi
sgoi
ngt
olookaf
terherwheny
oucome
her
e?”
“
Herbr
other
’swi
fesai
dshewi
l
ltakeheri
n.”
“That’
sbett
er.Somymoney?Shoul
dIcal
lfordebt
coll
ector
s?P1000isal
otofmoneykanaKenny.”
“
Waai
,Chr
ist
mascomesonceay
ear
.”
“
Eversi
ncet
hen,youdon’
ttal
ktome.Youloveme
f
ormoneywena.Thisot
hergender
,danger
ous!
”
Kennygi
ggl
ed.“
Nyaat
her
rawenaIl
ovey
ouf
ory
ou.
”
“
Ngng,
youj
ustwantmymoney
.”
“
KanammekanaIwasgoi
ngt
ocal
l
.Iwantmor
e.”
“
Kennyweh?
”
“
Rra?
”
“
Chr
ist
masi
sov
er.
”
Shel
aughed.“
Howar
eyou?
”
“Iam atcourt
.Somet i
mebackIfoundmygi rl
fr
iend
cheat
ingwi t
hmybosssoIcr ushedint
othecart hey
werein.Nothinghappenedt
othem butIam bei
ng
sued.
”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
It
’sal
lgood.
”
“
Soy
oust
il
lhav
eyourj
ob?
”
“No.Iam st
il
ll
ooki
ng.Gomaswenyana.(
It
’sbad.
)I
havetur
nedmycarintoaschool
bus.
”
“Iam real
l
ysorr
y.Mmeenewhanit
hawuzeni
gakena
one.(ButIdon’
thav
etheonet
housand.
)”
“
Whenar
eyoucomi
ng?
”
“
InAugust
.”
Someonespoket
ohim att
hebackgr
ound.“
Ihav
eto
go.Iwi
l
lcal
lyoul
ater
.”
“
What
’sgoi
ngt
ohappent
oyounow?
”
“Iam goingt
ohav et
opaysomecr
azymoney.ButI
will
tell
them Kennyi
sbr
ingi
ngmywhani
thawuzeni
akere?”
Shel
aughed.“
Heel
a,nnakej
elemadi
.(Ispentt
he
money.
)”
“
Youwi
l
ljustv
omi
titout
.Shar
paker
e?”
“
Eer
ra.
”
Hehungupt
henshel
eanedbackonherseatsmi
l
ing.

*
**

Atthefuner
al,
Kef
il
wesati
nthecarwi
thher
husband.
“
Wer
eal
l
yneedmoneyKef
il
we.
”
“Whereshoul
dIgeti tt
hen?Mamawon’tagr
eet
o
anyt
hingIsay.Iknowpapalef
tthef
arminmyname
butshewon’tgiveitt
ome.”
“
Butyoucangetev
ery
thi
ngi
fshedi
esr
ight
?Youar
e
t
heonlychi
l
d.”
“
Shedoesn’
tlookl
i
keshei
saboutt
odi
e.”
Herhusbandt ookasmallsachetfrom hi
spocket
andgav eittoher
.“I
fyouputthisinherdri
nkand
shedrinks,shewil
ldi
e.Shewillhavecardi
acarr
est
anddie.”
Kef
il
welookedathi
minshock.“
Youwantmet
oki
l
l
mymother?”
“Whatcanwedo?I t’
seitherwel oseev eryt
hingor
that.Youchoosewhaty ouwant .Youar enotbei ng
forcedi nt
odoingany thi
ngbutsoy oushoul dknow
thebanki sgoingt or epossessev eryt
hingandy ou
andIar egoingt ot hestreets.Weoweal otofpeople,
theywantt heirmoney .Weowef urnit
ureshops, they
aregoi ngtotakeourpr operty.Wewon’ tev enhav e
any t
hingtosell.Ilostmyj ob,Iam notwor kingand
neitherareyou, akereall y
ouknowi showt ospend
sonowy ouar
egoingtoseewhatpovert
yi s.Real
pov
erty
!Wear egoi
ngtohavet
ot r
ansferthekidsto
gov
ernmentschool
s.”
Shesl
owl
yt ookthesachett
henst
eppedoutoft
he
carwi
thi
t.Herdaughterwal
kedovert
oher.
“
Mama,
Iam hungr
y.”
“
OkMi
a,Iam comi
ng.Wai
twi
thdaddyi
nthecar
.”
Shewalkedtot hekitchenwhereshepour edjui
cein
aglassthenlookedar oundandpour edt hecontent
s
i
nthesacheti nsi
det heglass.Wit
hherhear t
poundi
ngsomuchshewal kedwithi
tt ohermot her
whowasi ntheot herroom withhersisterin-
law.
“
Isshest
il
lhav
inganepi
sode?
”
“
Shej
ustwokeupandshewant
stot
alkt
oKenny
.”
“Ok,Iwi
l
lcal
lKenny
.Youcango,
Iwi
l
llookaf
ter
her.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shewal
kedoutthenKef
il
weputt
hej
uicedownand
l
ookedathermother
.
“
Youwantt
ospeakt
oKenny
?”
“
Kenny
…”
Kefi
lwesi
ghedthent
ookoutherphoneandcall
ed
Kennyput
ti
ngthephoneontheloudspeaker
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Kenny
…”
“
Mmama.
.”
“
Kenny
…”
“
It
’sme.I
t’
sme.
”
“
Kenei
l
we?
”
“
Ma?
”
“
Kenny
…”
Kefil
wesighedgett
ingannoyed.“
Youcanhearshe
haslosti
tKeneil
we, howaboutyousaysomet
hing
thatcanhelp.
”
“Therei
snothi
ngIcansaythatishelpf
ul.Sheis
havinganepi
sode.I
sn’
titpossi
bleforyoutoretur
n
her?”
“
No.Kennyshei
sat
tendi
ngaf
uner
al.
”
“Shei
snotf
eel
i
ngwel
l
.Shewon’
tbemuchuse
anyway.
”
Kef
il
wehungupashermot
her
’si
steri
n-l
awwal
ked
i
nagainhol
dingpi
l
ls.
“
Sheneedst
otakeherpi
l
ls.
”
“
Ihadbr
oughtherj
uice.
”
“
Shecandr
inkt
hepi
l
lswi
tht
hej
uice.
”
Kef
il
wenoddedandwal
kedout
.

*
**

I
nsidetheroom,
thesisteri
n-l
awputthetwopil
lson
herhusband’
ssi
ster
’stonguethent
ookthejui
ce.
“
Ngng…”
“
Youdon’
twantj
uice?
”
“
Ngng…”
“
Ok.Dr
inkt
hem wi
thwat
ert
hen.
”
Shehelpedherdr inkwiththewat erthenthesi
sterin
-l
awwal kedoutwi ththejui
ce.Shel ookedatKefil
we
whowaschat tingwi thsomeaunt sandwal kedover
tothem jumpi
ngi nt heconv er
sati
onwhi l
ehanding
Kefibackthejuice.Unawar e,Kef
i gul
peditdown
quenchingherthirstandcont i
nuedwi tht
he
conversati
on.
.
.
Famil
yIam t
rav
eli
ngandwon'tbeabl
etotouchmy
phonesoIt
houghtIwouldpostt
hemorni
nginser
t
nowinst
eadofl
ateron.Goodmorni
ng
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#11

Tshenol
olai
donthebedwhi
let
hewhi
tedoct
or
spoketoherandhermot
her
.
“
Wehav
etokeepherher
eforobser
vat
ion.
”
“
No.Shecan’
tsl
eepher
e.Wehav
etogohome.
”
“Youhavetounder
standthatweneedtokeepher
underobser
vati
on,
herbleedi
ngisnotnor
mal.Shei
s
bleedi
ngmuchmor eexcessi
vel
ythansheshoul
d
be.”
“
Iwi
l
lgett
hedoct
orwhi
tes,
shecan’
tsl
eepher
e.”
“
Mam-
“
“
MrsDoctor
,mydaught
erissl
eepi
ngathome.If
t
her
eisanyt
hingwr
ongthenIwil
lbr
ingherback.
”
Thedoctorl
ookedatTshenol
o.“
Honey
,youcanake
yourowndecisi
on.
”
“
Iagr
eewi
thmymot
her
.It
’sbestIgohome.
”
Thedoct
ornodded.“
Ok,yourchoi
ce.Iwi
l
lpr
escr
ibe
somepainki
l
ler
sforher
.”
“
Ok.
”
Thedoct orwalkedouttheTshonolo’
smotherhel
ped
herdownt hebed.Thepai nhadgonedown,she
dressedupt henminuteslat
erthei
rcardr
oveoff.
Hermot herplayedSechaba’
strackswhil
eTshenolo
satquiet
lybesideher.
“
Whoel
seknowsy
ouar
epr
egnant
?”
“
ThaboandKenei
l
we.
”
“
Whydi
dyout
ell
thatgi
rl
?”
“
Iwant
edt
obor
rowmoneyf
ort
heabor
ti
onpi
l
ls.
”
“
Andwher
ewoul
dshegeti
t?”
“
Shef
oundaj
ob.
”
“
Withherdumbness?Sheprobablysl
eptherwayin
t
ogetthat.Youshoul
dhavetol
dme, foryoursake
y
oubetterhopeshedoesn’
ttel
lanyone.I
t’
senough
t
hatwearedeali
ngwithyourpornogr
aphy.”
Tshenol
oswal
l
owedkeepi
ngqui
et.
“
Yourfat
her’
sotherkidshaveneverdonesuch.Thei
r
mothermustberej
oicing.Ij
ustdon’
tunder
stand
whatwassohardaboutst ayi
ngawayfrom Kenny!I
warnedyouaboutt
hatgi r
lmorethanonce!
”
Theypassedbythepharmacywherehermothergot
twopacketsofDr.Whi
tepadsthendr
ovethem
home.

*
**

Mothusiwalkedoutoft
hepoli
cest ati
onandsmil
ed
star
ingatSelet
sowhowaswai t
ingf orhi
m.Shewas
beauti
ful
butshewasnotKenny .Shecouldnev
erbe
Kenny.Hetookadeepbreat
hhuggi ngher.
“
Hey
…”
Sel
etsosmi
l
ed.“
ThankGody
ouar
eout
!”
“Yeah.ButIam st
il
lgoi
ngf
ort
ri
al.Ist
abbed
someone.”
Theyhel
dhandswalki
ngtothebusst
op.Sel
etso
keptqui
ett
il
ltheywer
eathomethenshesat
besi
deshi
m ont
hebed.
“
Iwantust
otal
k.”
Hel
ookedather
.“About
?”
“
Aboutwhathappened.Wi
thy
ouandThabang.
”
“Ij
ustl
osti
t.If
oundhi
m ki
ssi
nghert
ryi
ngt
otake
advant
ageofher.
”
“Kennyisagr ownperson,sheknowswhat ’
sri
ght
andwr ong,youshouldn’
tcareaboutwhatshedoes.
Todayy oualmostkil
ledThabangallbecausey
ou
couldn’
tcontrolyour
self
.Personal
l
yIam notafanof
viol
ence,Idon’twanttobescaredofyou.”
“
Itwon’
thappenagai
n.Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Ihopei
tdoesn’
t.Idon’
twantt
hisbabytohavea
v
iol
entf
atherwhoisgoi
ngtoendupinjail
.”
Mothusi
smil
edthenkissedher.“
Iam sor
ry.Iwi
l
l
nev
erhappenagai
n.Iheardyou.”
Heki ssedherhardergett
ingontopofherthentook
offherdressandpant i
es.Hetookoffhi
st-shi
rtthen
kissedheragain.Hesqueezedherbreastgentl
y,
theywer eget
ti
ngf ul
ler
.Herbreastor
igi
nall
ywere
smallert
hanKenny ’
s.Het ookouthisdi
ckand
rubbeditonsli
twhil
eshemoanedsof tl
y.Hef l
i
pped
them gett
ingherontop, Selet
sohel
dhisdickupri
ght
andgentlylower
edher selfonitt
henbegunridi
ng
him whil
eherbreastshook.
Mothusi t
houghtofKenny,hecouldn’tseem tonot
thi
nkaboutthatkisshehadwal kedinon.Somehow
heknewhi sKennywoul dneverdothatandt hat
Thabangwasj usttr
y i
ngtotakeadvantageofher.
Eversincehehadshownhi m Kenny’spictur
e,he
alwayshadtoment ionherbeauty.
Heswal l
owedhardashisdickgotsoft
erthenhe
l
ookedatSel et
sogoingupanddown.Hef li
pped
them gett
ingontopofhert
henkissedhertryi
ngto
gethi
sheadbacki nt
oit.Hi
sdickgotsemi har
das
hethrusti
nandoutofherstari
ngather.
Heclosedherey esbri
efl
yreal
izi
nghisdi
ckjust
wasn’tcooperati
ngandimagineditwasKenny.He
r
ecall
edt hei
rfir
stti
me,thosemoansandjusthow
t
ightandwetshewas.
Sel
etsomoanedashecont
inuedt
hrust
ing.Sweat
bal
lsformedonhi sf orehead,hewascute,notthe
cutestbuthischaracterwaswhatdr ewhertohi m.
Shewr appedherlegsar oundhim movingherwai st
fr
om beneat hmeet i
nghi m hal
fwaywhil
etheir
bodiesclappedagainsteachot her
.
Sheclosedhereyesfeel
inghersel
freachtheend
thenspasmedwhi l
ehegav eherafewmor et
hrust
s
andshothisl
oadi nsi
deher.Hesli
doutt henwiped
hisdi
ckwithherdress.
“
Letmemakeacal
ltomyboss.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hetookhisphoneandwalkedoutzi
ppi
nghispants
shi
rt
less.Exhaust
ed,
Sel
etsocl
osedherey
esfall
ing
asl
eep.

*
**

Outside,
Mot husi
cal
ledKenny.Hi
sheartskipped
surpri
sedthathewasn’tbl
ockedyetasthephone
start
edringi
ng.Sheansweredandremainedsil
ent.
“
Hey
…Iam out
.”
“
Pleasenevercallmeagai
n.Iwantnot
hingt
odo
wi
thy ou.Whatev
erwehadisover.
”
“
Ilov
eyou.Imadeami
stake.
”
“Andthismistakewentforoverthreemonths?I
knowy ouwant edtogetmepr egnantsothatIdon’
t
gotouni ver
sit
y.Idon’
tknowwhaty ouar
egoingto
dobecauset hatisnev
ergoingtohappen.Please
stopcall
ingme. ”
“HowcouldInotcheatKennywheny ouwere
denyi
ngmesex?Doy our eal
izeweonlyhadsex
once,Iwouldunderst
andi fi
twasbeforewehadsex,
whatwast hereasonforsayingno?
”
“
Soi
t’
smyf
aul
tthaty
ouwer
echeat
ing?
”
“
Yes!WheneverIcamether
e,y
ouwoul dn’
tletme
t
ouchyou.Iam humanandIhaveneeds.”
“
Yousleptwi
thherwhenIwast
her
e,wast
hata
mist
aketoo?
”
“
Youcal
l
edmenames!Iwasal
soangr
y.”
“
Youwer
eangr
ybecauseIwasangr
yfory
ou
cheat
ingonme?
”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Soam Ibecausei
t’
sov
er.
”
Shehungupt henheswal
lowedhardleani
ngagai
nst
thewall
.Hi
sphoner angt
henhesighedansweri
ng
hisbr
other
’scall
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Isawy
ourmessage.Whathappened?
”
“Ihadafi
ghtwi
thThabang.Icaughthi
m wi
th
Kenny.
”
“
Doi
ngwhat
?”
“
Kissi
ng.
”
“
What
?”
“
Ilosti
t,west
art
edf
ight
ingt
henIst
abbedhi
m.”
“
Ishedead?
”
“No.ThabangandKennytol
dthepol
i
cesomest
ory
butIam sti
ll
goi
ngfortr
ial
.”
“
Ihopey
oubr
okeupwi
thKenny
,Inev
erl
i
kedt
hat
gi
rl
.”
“
Ilov
eher
.AndnowSel
etsoi
spr
egnant
.”
“FocusonSelet
so.Atl
eastsheismature.Youcan’
t
r
unningaroundaft
erachil
d.Sheisgoingtogoto
Gaboroneandstar
tcheat
ingony ou,
shewi l
lfor
get
you.Justf
ocusonSelet
so.”
“
Youdon’
tunder
stand,
Ireal
l
ylov
eKenny
…”
“IfyoulovedKennyyouwouldn’
tbencheat
ingonher
.
Youwoul dn’tbewi
thSel
etso.Ihavetogo.Wewil
l
talklat
er.
”
“
Shar
p.”
Mot husiwal
kedbackinsi
det
hehouseandsighed
stari
ngatSelet
sosleepi
ngwhil
ethi
nki
ngofhis
future.

*
**

Att
hefuner
al,Kef
il
weslowlysatdownfeeli
ngdizzy
put
ti
ngherhandoverherchestaspai
nstruckher.
Shegentl
ymassagedherchestwheezi
ng.Her
uncl
e’swif
ewhowasseatedbesideherfr
owned
star
ingather
.
“
Kef
i!What
’swr
ong?
”
Kefi
conti
nuedgaspingf orairthencoll
apsedfall
ing
offt
hechairshewassi tt
ingon.Peopl etur
nedand
l
ookedwhiletheuncle’swifekneltbesideher
.Ithad
beenagessincesher eti
redfrom bei
nganur sebut
shecoul
ddet ectcar
diacarrestwhenshesawone.
“
Let
’st
akehert
othehospi
tal
!
”
Herhusbandrushedoverandlookedathiswif
e
l
ayi
ngtherewhileheruncl
e’swif
eper f
ormedCPRon
her
.Hiswholebodyfrozeashest ar
edunableto
move.
Themenr ushedoverthenpickedherupandputher
i
nthecar.Theuncle’
swi f
ejumpedi nandconti
nued
wit
hCPRbr eathi
ngheav i
l
ywhi l
eKefil
ayther
enot
moving.

*
**
Meanwhil
e,nowlucid,
Kefil
we’smotherwat
chedas
t
hecardroveoffwithherdaughteri
nit
.Oneoft
he
r
elat
iveswalkedovert
ocomf orther
.
“Shei
sgoingtobeok.Don’
twor
ryy
our
sel
f.We
shoul
dprayforher
.”
“Iam notworr
ied.I
fGodiscal
li
ngforher
,whoam
arewet ost
opi t
?Letherj
oinmaker,
ifi
t’
shert
ime,
i
t’sherti
me.”
“
No,
youshoul
dn’
ttal
kli
ket
hat
.”
“Talkl
ikewhat?Woul dyouratherGodt akesyou
i
nsteadoftheper sonhewant s?Pleasedon’tstand
betweenGodandhi swil
l.I
fsheismeantt odie,she
will
die.Wewilljustbur
ryher.Nothingextreme
aboutthat
,May beit’
sthedevilcal
li
ngforher ,
we
neverknow.”
MmagweKef
isi
ghedr
elaxi
ngunbot
her
ed.

*
**
Kefi
lwe’shusbandsati
nhiscart
hought f
ull
y,it
wouldhurthimtolosehi
swifebutatthesamet ime,
herpoli
cywouldpayup,themoneywoul dsolveal l
thei
rprobl
ems.Het ookadeepbreat
ht henstarted
thecarandfoll
owedKefitot
hehospit
al hopingshe
wasdead.

*
**

I
nGabor one, Aronawal
kedout si
deasacardr ov
ein
thenaladyst eppedoutinablackshortdr
esswith
heelsexposingheryell
owsmoot hlegs.Shetookoff
hersunglassesandsmi l
edstandingbeforehi
m.
“
Hi…wespokeear
li
eron.Candy
.”
Aronasmi l
ed.“
I’
m Arona,
ther
eisthecar,Igoti
t8
mont hsback.I
t’
ssti
l
l i
ngoodcondit
ion.
”Hepointed
athisblackshi
nyBMW.
“
Whyar
eyousel
l
ingi
tthen?
”
Hel
aughed.“
Candyweh,akereobat
lagorekakol
oi?
(
Youwanttobuyacarri
ght?)St
ickt
othat
.Bowhy
ar
eyousel
l
ingi
tfort
henkeng?
”
Candylaughedt
ucki
ngherl
ongcur
lyhai
rbehi
ndher
ear
.“Sorry
.CanIseei
nsi
de.
”
Aronat ookoutt
hecarkeysfr
om hi
spocketthen
unlockeditandhandedhert
hecarkey
s.“There.
”
Shewalkedov erandgotinsidethecar.Shestart
ed
theengi
neandr av edt
hecarabi tbeforest
epping
outandopeningt hebonnet.Shecheckedacoupl e
ofthi
ngsthencloseditandl ookedathim.
“
It
’sbeaut
if
ul.Butwhyar
eyousel
l
ingi
t?”
Hesmil
edatherthenshebl
ushedst
ari
ngathi
scut
e
smi
le.“
Ok.Iam sor
ry.
”
“Iwantt
obuyacart hati
sn’
texpensi
vetomaint
ain.I
l
ostmyj ob.Ther
eyouhaveit
,Iam sel
li
ngi
tfor
P120K.”
“Myf ather’
scompanyi
shir
ing.Youcanget
somet hing.Imi
ghtbet
heli
ghtattheendofthe
tunnelthatyoukeeppr
ayi
ngfor.Doyouhavea
degree? ”
“
Yeah,
inaccount
ing.
”
“
Ithi
nky
oushoul
dgof
orani
nter
view.
”
“
Yout
hinkt
heywi
l
lhi
reme?
”
“
Yes.Iwi
llsendy
outhedet
ail
s.Maybeattheendof
t
heday,y
ouwon’tev
enneedtosell
y ourcar
.”
Hesmil
edmakingherchuckl
e.“
Ok.Sendt
hedet
ail
s
andIwi
llgof
oranint
ervi
ew.”
“
Ok.Uhhsoyouwil
ltel
lmeifyoudon’tgeti
tthenI
wil
lcomeandbuyt
hecar.Ihavej
ustmov edhere
f
rom NewZeal
andandIneedacar.”
“
Who’
syourf
ather
?”
“
OhMbi
ki
wa.By
e!”
Shegotinthecaranddr
ovewhil
ehestoodthere
fr
ozentohisspot.Hi
sbr
other
’scardr
ovei
nt hen
parkedbehi
ndhis.
“
Didt
hel
adycome?
”
“
Iwasj
ustwi
thMbi
ki
wa’
adaught
eri
nsi
demyy
ard.
”
“
Whi
chMbi
ki
wa?Thatr
ichol
dguy
?”
“
Yeah.Shesai
dIshouldgoforani
ntervi
ewather
f
ather
’scompanybecauset
heyarehir
ing.
”
Maat
lasmi
l
ed.“
Isshebeaut
if
ul?
”
“
Yesgapekel
ekut
wane.(
Yesandshei
sacol
ored.
)”
Hisphonevibr
atedi
nhispocket.Het ooki
toutand
sawKenny’sname.Aninvol
untarysmi l
edformedon
hi
slipswhi
lehishear
tstar
tedracing.Hisbrot
her
star
edcuri
ously.
“KeenengwanawagaMbi
ki
wa?(
Isi
tMbaki
wa’
s
daught
er?
)”
HeopenedKenny’
smessaget
henf
rownedand
i
mmediatel
ycal
ledher
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Yourmom i
sdead?
”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#12

Thr
eeMont
hsLat
er…

Inthebathr
oom,Tshenolochangedherpadthatwas
soakedinbloodandputanotheronethenwalked
outandwentoutsidewhereshethrewthepadinthe
binasaneighborwalkedoutofherhouseand
smiled.
“HeyNolo,whatt
imeareyougoi
ng?Ibety
oucan
alr
eadybreat
heintheai
rofGabor
one.
”
Shef
akedal
augh.“
Iam l
eav
ingt
omor
row.
”
“
Oh…ok,
sowhatar
eyougoi
ngt
ost
udy
?”
“
MBA.
”
“
That’
snice.Goodluck,
youar
egoi
ngt
omakeit
.
WhereisKenny?Shemustbesadt
owatchy
ou
l
eave.
”
“
Idon’
tknow.It
hinkshewentt
ost
aywi
thher
mot
her
.”
“
Uhu!Ehe,
ok.By
e.”
Tshenolonoddedthenwal kedbacki nsidethehouse
passingbythekit
chenwher eshedr ankmor e
painki
ll
ersandwentt oherroom.Shet earf
ull
ysat
downast hepainslashedherabdomenov erand
overagain.Sheputherhandsov erherf acecryi
ng
stari
ngatherwardrobe,shewassupposedt obe
l
eav i
ngwi t
hthepainbutwi t
hthebleedi ngandpain,
shecouldn’t
.
Shereachedforherphoneandlookedatti
met
hen
di
aledKenny.Thephonerangforawhile.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
…oset
seot
samai
l
e?(
Hav
eyoul
eftal
ready
?)”
“
Yes.
”
Tear
srol
leddownhercheeks.“
Iam real
l
ysad.I
al
waysimagi
nedusgoingtogether
.”
Kennysi
ghed.“
Iam sor
ry.Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?
”
“Iam i
npain.Thepai
njustwon’
tst
opandit’
sthr
ee
o’cl
ockbutIhavechangedpadsmul
ti
plet
imes
al
ready
.”
“
Iam sor
ry.Whatdi
dthedoct
orsayagai
n?”
“Idi
dn’tgo.Mamadoesn’thavemoneyf
ort
he
pri
vatedoctor.May
beIshouldn’
thav
eabor
tedt
he
babyKenny .
”
“Iam r
eallysor
rybutIt hi
nkit
’stimeyouwentt othe
hospit
al.Yoursituati
onisser
ious.Youhavebeen
bleedi
ngsince,Idon’tthi
nkit
’snormal.Youcan’tsi
t
athomescar edt hatpeopl
ewillknowwhaty oudid
wheny oucandi e.”
“
Peopl
ewi
l
lst
artgossi
pingmeKenny
.”
“Peopl
ewillgossipwhetheryoudogoodorbad.
Suchthi
ngshappen.Pl easegotothehospi
tal
and
seekmedicalattent
ion.
”
Thecall
cutduetoinsuff
ici
entfunds.Tshenololay
onherbedwait
ingforthepainki
ll
erstokickin,i
t
usual
l
ytookti
met i
l
l t
hepaingotbet t
er.

*
**
Mot husihandedt hecustomerherchanget oget
her
withther eceiptthentookouthi sphoneandv i
ewed
somest at useswal ki
ngaway .HeopenedKenny ’s
statusandst aredatherpi ctur esmil
ingatthe
camer a.Hezoomedi nitstaringatherwithasmi l
e
andr epl
iedt oit.
“
Goodl
uck!
”
Hesenti tandlookedatherlastseen,
itwasanhour
before.Helookedattheothermessageshehad
sentherbutshenev errepl
i
edt oanyofthem,j
ust
l
eftthem onbluet i
ck.
“
Ihopey
ougett
hatdegr
ee.
”
Hesi
ghedvi
ewingafewmorestatusesashisshi
ft
cametoanend.Het
ookhist
hingsandgotat axi
home.Athi
shouse,
hefoundSeletsoeat
ing.
“
Heybabe…”
Hesmi
l
edsi
tt
ingbesi
deher
.“Hey
.”
“
Youwantsomef
ood.
”
“
Nokeshar
p.(
I’
m good.
)”
Sel
etsol
ookedathi
m.“
Arey
ouok?
”
“
Yeah…”
Hechangedt hentookouthi sf orm 5’
sbooksand
pastpapersthenst art
edreadingont hetabl
ethough
hecouldn’tseem tounderstandwhathewasr eadi
ng.
Hestaredatt hesamewor dabsentmi ndedl
yfor
minuteswonder i
ngj ustwhatkindofamanKenny
wasgoi ngtomeet .Heknewi twoul dbesomeone
bett
erthanhim.Nowashesatt herehewishedhe
coul
dt urnbackthehandsoft i
meandactr i
ght.
Theirlovehadbeensoi nnocentandpur eandhehad
rui
nedi t.Hehadnoonet obl ame.Heknewhewas
j
ustgoi ngtobeamer ebadmemor yinherl
ife,t
he
guywhohadbr okenherhear t.Hedroppedthepen
andr ubbedhiseyesthent ookhisphoneandopened
thefolderwit
hherpictures.Heswal l
owedhar dthen
gotupandpour edhimsel fsomewat erwhil
eSel et
so
watchedTVst il
leati
ng.
Hedr anksomesi t
tingdownt hentri
edtoreadbuthe
sti
llf
oundhi msel
fthinkingofhisgir
l.I
twasthepai n
ofknowi nghecouldn’tgobackintimeandactr ight
,
all
hehadt odowasbepat i
ent.Bemor epat
ient.His
thr
oatt i
ghtenedaspai nchokedhim.Tearsfi
ll
edhi s
ey
est
hendr
oppedonhi
sbooks.
Hequi
cklywi
pedthem awayt
hengotupwi
thphone
hi
swal
kingout.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
Heclear
edhi
sthr
oat
.“Yeah.Iam goi
ngt
oget
ai
rt
ime.”
“
Ok.
”
Hewal kedoutthroughthegat
ethencal
l
edher
.Hi
s
heartskippedasthephonerangacoupl
eoft
imes
thenshef i
nall
yanswered.
“
Mothusi
,Idon’
twantt
obl
ocky
ou,
pleasedon’
t
f
orcemyhand.”
Heswal
l
owed.“
Ijustwant
edt
osaygoodl
uck.
”
“
Thanks.
”
“
Youwi
l
lmakei
t.Youar
eahar
dwor
ker
.”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“Iam sor
ry.Iam sor
ryforhurti
ngyou.IwishIcango
backinti
meand…andbet hemany ouneeded.Il
ove
yousomuchKenny .Il
ovedy oufort
woy earswhil
e
your ejectedme.Thedayy ousai dy es,Ididn’tsleep.
Asst upi dasthismaysound, al
l Ikeptthinki
ngwas
ourfut uretogether
,ourki dsandt hingsli
ket hat.I
wantt owal koutfr
om t hisrelat
ionshi pwithSel etso
butIcan’ tbecauseshei spregnantandshewon’ t
stopt alkingaboutsuicide.Idon’ twantt obet he
reasonsheki l
lsherselfthoughIknowdeepdownI
don’tlov eher.Myhear tisbr eakingbecauseIknow
youar egoi ngtomeetsomeoneandhewi l
lbe
everythingIwasnotandi t’
sgoi ngt ohurttowat ch
thatunf oldbeforemyey es.”Hesni ffedcr yi
ng.
“Il
ongf or
gaveyou.YoushouldfocusonSeletso.
Sheisagoodper son,natur
all
ysheisawonder ful
person.Youmighthavelostwhatwehadbuty ou
standachancewi t
hSeletso.Seehowshesuppor ts
you?Howshel ovesyou…y oucan’tt
radethatfor
anythi
ng.Youhavetogi v
eityourall
andloveher
ri
ght.”
“Kebatl
awenahel a.(
Iwanty ouonly.
)Ij
ustwant
you.Idon’
tthi
nkIcanloveany oneli
keIloveyou.Ke
feel
ergorekedepressed.(If
eelli
keIam depressed.
)
Ican’
teat,Ir
egi
steredtorewrit
emyf orm 5butIfeel
Iam goi
ngt
ofai
lbecauseIam t
oost
ressed.
”
“
Idon’
tknowwhaty
ouwantmet
osay
.”
“Idon’texpectyoutosayany t
hing.I
t’
sal
lmyfaul
t.I
am justfacingtheconsequencesofmyacti
ons.I
wishi twasadr eam,onethatIcanwakeupfrom
andt ell
youallaboutitt
omor r
owwhenwemeetat
ourusual spot.
”
Kennyt ookadeepbr eath.“
Youhur tmesomuchI
don’tthi
nkIam evergoingt ogetbackwi t
hy ou.You
needt odealwit
hit.Iam happyy ouarechoosingto
re-
wr i
teyourfor
m 5.Youcan’ tfai
lifyousetyour
mindonpassi ng.Iam reall
ysorrythatyouarenow
carr
y i
ngthepainyouhav ei
ny ourheart
,Ihopeone
dayy oucanheal.”
Henoddedwi
pingawayhi
stear
s.“
Met
oo.
”
“
Ihopey
oupass.
”
“
Yeah…shar
p.”
“
Bye.
”
Hehungupandsl
i
dhisphoneinpocket
.Hetooka
wal
ktocl
earhi
sheadt
henfinal
l
ywalkedbackhome
andresumedhisseat
.Sel
etsof
ini
shedwashi
ngher
pl
ateandworri
edlyl
ookedathi
m.
“
Youseem st
ressed.
”
“
No,
Ijusthav
eaheadache.Not
hingser
ious.
”
“
CanIpoury
ousomej
uice.
”
“
Nokeshar
p.”
“
Ok.
”
Hel
ookedathi
sbookst
henst
art
edst
udy
ing.

*
**

InMaun, Kef
ilwewatchedast hewor kersfrom
Furni
tureshoptookoutherf av ori
tecouchesandt he
fri
dge.Sheswallowedast heydr oveof fthenwalked
backinsidethealmostempt ysi t
ti
ngr oom, wi
thher
husbandoutdr i
nkinghi
ssor rowsaway ,she
wonderedhowt heywer egoingt opayr entmonth
endandwhatshewasgoi ngt of eedt hekidsonce
theycamebackhome.Shesi gheddi ali
ngher
mother’
snumber
.Itr
angf
orawhi
l
ethenheruncl
e’
s
wi
fepicked.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hi,
letmespeakt
omymot
her
.”
“
Shei
ssl
eepi
ng.Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?
”
“
Iam f
ine.Ial
mostdi
edt
hatday
.”
“
Wewer
eal
lsoscar
ed.
”
“
Yeah,
cany
oupl
easewakeherup.I
t’
sser
ious.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shewait
edforawhi
l
ethenf
inal
l
yhear
dher
mother
’svoi
ce.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Mama,
Ineedmyf
airshar
eoft
hef
arm papal
eft
.”
“Whatfai
rshare?Thatf
armi
sinmyname!Youthi
nk
Iwil
ll
etyoutakewhatmyhusbandwor
kedhar
d
for
?”
“
Hesai
ditwoul
dbemi
ne.
”
“
Itwoul
dhav
ebeeny
our
shady
ounotchanged.Now
i
twil
lnevergot
oyou.Kennyi
sgoi
ngt
oinher
iti
t
i
ncaseIdie.
”
“
Kenny
?”
“Yes.Kenny.ShewenttoGaboronet
oday,
ofcause
youdidn’tknowthi
sbecauseyoudon’
tcar
eabout
her.
”
“
Youblameme?Canyoubl
ameme?Youwantmet
o
l
ovet
hatman’
schi
ld?
”
“Kennyi
syourdaughterKef
il
we.Nomat
terhowshe
cameabout,shei
sy ourchi
l
d.”
Tearsfi
ll
edherey es.“Iwil
lneverl
oveher .Howdo
youexpectmet olov ehermama?Youdon’ t
underst
andhowIf eel!Someti
mesIwi shIcould
havesuffocat
edhert odeathwhenshewasbor n.I
wishshecanj ustdiebecauseIwillneverloveher.
”
“
Godhav
emer
cyony
ou.
”
Shehungupbef
oreKef
icoul
dsayany
thi
ngel
se.

*
**
Afterhoursoft raveli
ng,Kennywal kedoutoft hebus
atbusr ank,Gabor one.Shel ookedar oundseei ngal
l
thepeoplewal kingar oundwhi lesomest i
l
lsat
sell
ingthoughi twasal readylatei ntheevening.She
l
ookedatt het i
me, i
twasj ustaf t
ersev en,may bei
t
wasn’tsol at
eher e.Shegotherbagt henlooked
around,herhear tpoundi ngwithexci tementand
wor r
y.Theycalledi tthesincity,theci t
ywhere
peoplelosttheirvaluesandher eshewas.Al l her
dreamswer eaboutt ocomet rue.
“Obatl
aspeci
almama?Wakae?)
Doy
ouwantat
axi
speci
al?Wher
eareyougoi
ng?
”
Sheshookherheaddi
ali
ngAr
ona.
“
Hey
,hav
eyouar
ri
ved?
”
“
Ijustgotof
fthebus.
”
“
Whatcany
ousee?
”
Shel
ookedar
ound.“
IcanseeFNBATM.
”
“
Ok,goandwaitt
here.Iam coming.Justami nute.
Hol
dyourphoneproper
ly,
heretheystealespecial
ly
att
hist
ime.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shehungupt
hendr
aggedherbagt
otheATM
machi
ne.
“
Sor
rymama,
taxi
,wakae?
”
“
Keshar
p.”
“
Osur
esweet
y,Iwi
l
lgi
vey
ouadi
scount
.”
“
NoIam good.
”
Shewai tedbytheATM lookingaround.Shelooked
aroundthencaughtAronawal ki
ngov ertoher,her
heartskippedasshelookedathimi nhissweat
pantsandt -shi
rt
.Hechuckledstari
ngather.She
hadn’tseem inalongti
meandshehadal most
forgott
enjusthowattr
activ
ehewas.
“
Segor
ogi
l
esemat
la’
nyanasame.
”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Stopcal
l
ingmet
hat
.”
Hepul
ledherinf
orahugt henhel
dhertightl
yinhi
s
ar
msrubbingherback.Herhear
tstar
tedracingev
en
moref
astershecoul
dsearhecouldhearit.He
br
eathedonherneckthatshef
eltgoosebumbsall
ov
er.Forminutest
heystoodst
il
lholdi
ngeachother
.
Hefi
nall
ysteppedback.
“
Let
’sgo.Ar
eyouhungr
y?”
“
Yes.
”
Hepi
ckedherbagandl edherwherehewaspar ked
t
henputherbaginhisbootthenlockedthecarand
t
ookherhandleadi
ngherinsideRailPar
kmall.
“Ithoughty
ougotof
fal
ongwayt
hinki
ngy
ouhad
arr
ived.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Iam nott
hatst
upi
d.”
Theli
ghtswereoninsi
det
hemal
l
,Ar
onat
ooka
goodlookathert
hensmil
ed.
“Whatdoyouwantt
oeat
?Pi
zzakanaKFC?Ther
eis
chi
ckenli
ckent
oo.
”
“
Uhhany
thi
ngi
sfi
ne.
”
Hewalkedwithheri
nsi
deKFCwhichwasalmost
emptyconsi
deringt
het
ime.Thecashi
erl
ookedat
hi
m wit
hasmi le.
“
Goodev
eni
ng,
whatar
eyouhav
ingt
oday
?”
Heorder
edhismealthenmomentslat
ertheywalked
backtot
hecar.Hestart
edt
hecarhandinghera
dri
nkanddr
oveoff.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Sohowi
syourmom?
”
Sheopenedherdr inkandt ookasi pshruggi
ng.“I
don’
tknow.Shenev ert
alkstome.ButIhear dt he
banktookherhouseandt heircars.Thehusband
l
osthisjob.
”Shel ookedathi m andcaughthim
star
ingatherthenshel ookedawaywi t
hashysmi le
whil
etakinganothersipofherdr ink.

*
**

AronaledKennyi
nsi
dehishousethem tookhert
o
thebedroom whi
l
ecarr
yingherheavybag.
“
What
’si
nsi
deher
e?I
t’
ssol
i
ght
.”
“
Justmycl
othes.
”
“
Ok,
youcant
akeashoweri
nsi
det
her
e.”
“
Ok.Thanky
ou.
”
“
It
’sal
lgood.
”
Hewalkedoutt
henshebr
eat
hedoutandopenedher
bag.

*
**

Ar
onat ookpl
atesf r
om thekitchenthenputthefood
i
nside.Aknockeruptedont hedoort henhewalked
overandopenedit.Hiselderl
yneighborlookedat
hi
m wi t
hanapologeticsmile.
“
Hi,Iam sosor
ryfort
his,
Iknowit
’slatebutmyTV
l
ostsignal
orsomethi
ng.Iwoul
daskmysonbuthe
l
eft
,couldyoupl
easecomeandf i
xitforme.”
“
Yeah.
”
“
Thanky
ousomuchson.
”
Hewalkedbackinsi
dehi
shouseandwentt
ot he
bedr
oom whereheknockedont
hebathr
oom door.
“Kenny
,Iam goingtof
ixmynei
ghbor
’ssat
ell
i
tedi
sh,
Iwil
lbebackjustnowok?”
“
Ok.
”
Hewal
kedoutandwentt
othenei
ghbor
’shouse.

*
**

Candydroveinsi
deArona’sgat
eandpar
kedbesi
de
hi
scartalki
ngont hephone.
“
Candy ,
youneedtobecaref
ul.Kanay
aanongi
t’
s
l
i
key oureinarel
ati
onleguybutguyi
snotina
r
elat
ionshi
pwithyou.
”
“Pearl
mmannaIhav efal
l
enf orthi
sguy.Even
thoughIkeepremindi
ngmy selfgorewearejust
fri
endsoratleasti
nmyey eswear e,Iam f
all
ingt
oo
hard.
”
“
Justwat
chout
.”
“
Wewi
l
ltal
klat
er.
”
Shel
ookedather
sel
fonhercompactmi
rr
ort
hen
steppedouthol
dingfood.Sheknockedont hedoora
coupleofti
mest henfi
nal
lywal
kedinsidethehouse.
Shesmi l
edstar
ingattheKFCont hetabl
et hen
walkedtotheki
tchenwhereshewar medthef ood
shehadcookedathome.
Sheheardfoot
stepsapproachi
ngthensmil
ed.“
Hey
,
soIbroughtdi
nner.Hopeyouarehungry
.”

*
**

Meanwhi l
eKennywal
kedoutofthebedr
oom wi
tha
towelwrappedar
oundherbodyandwenttot
he
kit
chen.
“Rona,Iseem t
ohavefor
gott
enmyl oti
on,
canIuse
your…-
“Shepausedstari
ngatthewomani nhi
s
kit
chenwhowasal sol
ookingathernow.
“
Whoar
eyou?
”
Kennyswal
l
owed.“
Kenei
l
we.Ar
ona’
sfr
iend.
”
Candyl
ookedattheeKennywi
thasmi
l
e.“
Oh,
Iam
Candy,
hisgi
rl
fr
iend.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#13

Kennysmi l
edstar
ingatCandy .Shewasn’
tsurprised
thatshemi ghtbethegi r
lf
ri
end.Shewasbeaut i
ful,
eveninwhatseemedl ikepyj
amas, shest
il
ll
ooked
beautif
ul.Shesmel tgoodtoo.Candytookoffher
spectacles.
“
Nicemeet
ingy
ou.
”
Kennynodded.“
Iwi
l
lgoanddr
ess.
”
“
Goodi
dea.
”
Kennywalkedbacki
nsidethebedr oom thendressed
upandpackedherbagcar ef
ullybeforeshepushed
i
ttothecorner
.Shefi
nall
ywal kedoutandsatont he
couchasCandywalkedfrom thekitchenholdi
ngt wo
pl
ates.ShesatdownbesideKenny .
“Iam sor
ry.Idi
dn’
tknowy ouwerearound.Iwoul
d
havecookedwhat’senoughforal
lofus.”
“
It
’sok.Iwi
l
leatt
heKFC.
”
“
Ok.
”
ThemaindooropenedthenAronawalkedin.He
fr
ownedstari
ngatCandywhil
ehisheartpounded.
HelookedatKennyt
henbackatCandy .
“
Hey
…Idi
dn’
tknowy
ouwer
ecomi
ng.
”
Shesmil
ed.“It
houghtIwouldsurpr
isey ouand
act
ual
lyf
eedy oureal
foodinst
eadoft heseoil
s.
ShameIdidn’
tknowKennywoul dbear ound.
”
Ar
onawalkedoverthensatont
hesi
nglecouchand
l
ookedatbot
hladies.“
Shecameinj
ustnow.”
Candysmil
edpushinghi
spl
atet
ohi
m.“
Eat
.It
’sone
ofmyfavor
it
edishes.
”
Kennylookedathimlocki
ngey eswit
hhim before
shegrabbedaplatehehaddi shedt
heKFCi nand
star
tedeati
ngsil
entl
y.Unsureofwhattodo, Ar
ona
swit
chedont heTVandgr abbedandopenedacan
ofhisdri
nkthentookasiptowethisdrythroat.
“
Howi
sitgoi
ngatwor
k?”
Ar
onal
ookedatCandy
.“I
t’
sgoi
ngwel
l
.”
“
Yougott
hePA?
”
“
Yes.
”
“Myfat
herwon’
tstoptal
ki
ngabouty
ou.Hesay
syou
aret
hebesthehaseverhad.
”
“
That
’sgod.
”
“Yeah.Iam j
usthappyy
oudon’
thav
etosel
lyourcar
anymor e.
”
“
Yeah,
met
oo.
”
Ar
ona’sphonev
ibr
atedfr
om hi
spockett
henhetook
i
toutandreadt
hewhatsappmessagefr
om Kenny
.
Kenny
:Kel
esut
ele?(
Shoul
dIexcusey
ou?
)
Hel
ookedatherwhi
l
esheat
ether
epl
i
ed.
Arona:Oresutel
aoy
akae?(
Youar
eexcusi
ngus
goingwhere?
)
Kenny:Aketse,kerobalakaet
otagompienohadarli
wagagoat sil
ey aana?Letampayahakaetota?(
I
don’
tknow, wher eam Igoi
ngtosl
eeptoadywhen
yourdarl
i
nghascome?Wher ear
eyougoingtoplace
me?)
Ar
ona:
Dar
liwamekemang?Wena?Ny
aar
etl
a
robal
akobedroomonghel
aagoresepemorat
iwa.
(Whoismydar l
i
ng?You?Wewil
lsl
eepint
he
bedroom myl
ov e.
)
Kenny
:Heelaker
adarl
iwagagowal
ekut
wane.(
I
meanyourcol
oreddar
li
ng.
)
Ar
ona:
Mothoogasedar
liwame.(
Thatper
soni
snot
mydar
li
ng.
)
Kenny :LesamaakaRona!Ar ekeeneCandy,t
he
gir
lfr
iend,kasal aket sogil
eletsogokagorekeneke
saitse,kanaIcan’ tfi
ght ,
bat anshi
megabareke
mansnat cher.(St
opwi t
hthel i
esRona.Shesays
sheiscandy ,
thegi r
lf
r i
end,Iwasleftscar
edbecause
Ididn’tknow, Ican’
tfight,theywil
lbeatmesayingI
am amansnat cher.
)
Arona:Gasegi
rl
fr
iendy amemothoo,war
engtot
a?
(Sheisnotmygir
lfr
iend,whatar
eyousay
ing?
)
Candyl
aughed.“
Eat
,thef
oodi
sgoi
ngt
ogocol
d.”
“
Myst
omachi
sabi
tupset
.”
“
Oh…soKennywher
ear
eyouf
rom?
”
Kennypr
essedherphonet
henl
ookedatCandy
.
“
Shakawe.
”
Ar
onar
eadKenny
’smessage.
Kenny:
ArekeenemmaMot sami
.(Shesay
sshei
s
Mrs.Motsamai
.!
)Theor
igi
nal
!
Candynoddedstar
ingatKennythencont
inued
eati
ng.Theawkwardsil
encefi
l
ledtheent
irehouse
asAronatypedonhisphonewhil
eKennypr essed
herphoneeati
ng.
Arona:Rragwekeenemohi riwame,(
Herfat
heris
myempl oyer)shesortofhelpedmegetthejob.Ga
kejol
eleene.( Iam notdat
ingher.
)
Kenny:
WaakaAr
ona.Otat
swar
isal
ekut
wanel
a
modimosel
osamometso.
Arona: OtlaswabaKenny ,oramangor eomaaka?
Kemot honamogowenakana.Ket lagoshapa
mar agony anaa.Ebil
ekebat l
awhani t
hauzeniwame.
Bakocour tbaemetsiene.(YouwillbesorryKenny,
whoar eyoucall
ingaliar
?Iam olderthanyou.Iwil
l
beaty ourli
ttl
ebutt
.Mat t
eroffact,
Iwantmyone
thousand.Thepeopl eatcourtarewaiti
ngforit
.)
Kennylaughedst
ari
ngatherphone,
Candylookedat
herthenshookherheadt
urni
ngtoArona.
“
Isev
ery
thi
ngok?
”
“
Yeah…”
“
Youar
esoqui
et,
itseemsKennyandIar
ebor
ing
y
ou.
”
Ar
onasmi
l
ed.“
Iam sor
ry.Howwaswor
k?”
“I
twasf i
ne,thebosssai dIam doi
ngwell.Iam just
gl
adIgott hatjob,worki
ngatthebankisthebest
deci
sionIhav eevertaken…”Shecont
inuedt al
ki
ng
whil
eAronar eadthenewmessage.
Kenny:Ehhsorry.Kanayaanongnnakejel
e
whanit
hauzeni.Kedireengneabuthi
?”(
Ispentt
he
onethousand.WhatshouldIdobigbrot
her?)
“
Tomor
rowIam goi
ngf
orawor
kshopi
nPal
apy
e.”
Aronanoddedstari
ngather.“
That’
sgood.I
tmeans
youarethebestatwhatyoudo.”
Shebl
ushed.“
Thanks.
”
Hequi
ckl
yty
pedonhi
sphone.
Arona:
Akgwehela,
gasemathata.(Justvomi
tit
,it
’s
notaprobl
em.
)Iam noty
ourbrother,otl
aswaba
Kenny.
Kenny
:Idon’
tknowwhatt
ocal
lyouany
mor
e.
Candy’
sphoner
angthenshetookitfrom t
hetable
andanswer
ed.“
Hel
lo?.
..ohok,Iam coming,Thank
you.
”
Candyst
oodup.“
Mydogwashi
tbyacar
.”
“
Isi
tdead?
”
“
Idon’
tknow.Ihav
etogo.
”
Ar
onagotupandwal
kedherout
sidet
ohercar
.
“
Iam sor
ryabouty
ourdog.
”
Shetur
nedt
ohim andsi
ghed.“
Yeah.Youf
orgott
o
i
ntr
oducemetoKenny.
”
“
Yeah…nextt
ime.
”
Shel
ookeddownswall
owi
ngt
henlookedbackat
hi
m.“Don’
tyout
hinkshei
sal
i
ttl
eyoungforyou?
”
“
Yout
hinkshei
stooy
oung?
”
“Yeahabi
t.Al
lal
ongIt
houghty
oumeantsomeone
big.
”
“
Nah,
that
’sher
.”
Shelookedinhiseyeswi
shi
ngshehadthe
confi
dencetosaysomethi
ng.Shesmi
ledatl
ast
thengotinhercar.
“
Ishoul
dgo,
bye.
”
“
Yeah.
.”
Shest art
edhercarandr ever
sed.Ar onawal
kedt o
thegat ethenclosedi tbeforewalki
ngbacki nside
thehousewher eKennywaschangi ngthechannel
ontheTV.Hesmi ledst
ar i
ngather,shehadpl ait
ed
thethinnestcor nrowev eranditshowedher
beautifulfaceev enmor e.Shelookedathim and
smiledbef oreturningbackt otheTVmaki nghi m
wonderi fshewasawar eofherlooksorjust
obli
vioust oit.
Hehadswornt otakei
teasywi
thherbutseei
ngher
seat
edri
ghtthere,i
twr
eckedhi
m.Hesatdownnext
toherwher
eCandyhadbeensitti
ngandsmi l
ed.
“
Somadi
ameakae?(
Sowher
eismymoney
?)
Shelookedathi
m smil
i
ng.“Ispenti
t.Al
lofi
t.They
wil
lj
usthavetoarr
estyouatcourt
.”
“
Theyar
enotgoi
ngt
oar
restmebuty
ou.
”
Sheputt
her
emot
edown.“
Iwi
l
ldenyknowi
ngy
ou.
”
Aronacl
appedhi
shandsonce.“
Odanger
ous
Kenei
lwe.
”
Shel
aughed.“
Idon’
twantt
ogot
ojai
l
.”
“
Whatar
ewewat
chi
ng?
”
“
Idon’
tknow.
”
“
Uhu,
kanagawat
lwael
aTV.Dil
otsakoshakawe.
(
Youarenott
oTv
.Shakwet
hings.
)”
Kennysmackedhi
m wi
thcushionpl
ayful
ly.“
Iknow
TV.WehaveTVathomejustthati
tstopped
worki
ng.
”
Heputbothhi
sl egsont
hecouchthenputKenny
bet
weenthem thatshel
ayherupperbodyonhi
s,her
l
owerbodybetweenhislegs.
Hechuckl
ed.“
Sor
ry,
ofcausey
ouknowTV.
”
Shesmi l
edrelaxi
ngthentheybothstar
tedwatching
amov ieasitstar
ted.Aronalookedathisphone
thoughtf
ull
ythenswitchedi
toff.

*
**

Candythrewputherdeaddogi nablackplasti
cthen
sighedwalkingtothebackhousewher eshehaddug
ahol et
hent hrewi
tinsidet
here.Sheclosedthehole
withashov elandwalkedbackinsideherhouse.She
tookherphoneandcal ledArona.
“Thesubscr
iberyouhav
edi
aledi
sunav
ail
abl
e,
pleaset
ryagain-
“
Shedroppedthecallwonderi
ngwhathecoul
d
possi
blybedoingthentext
edhim.
Candy:Hey
,Iwi
l
lcomeandcol l
ectmycasser
ole
tomorr
ow.Mydogisdead.Ibur
iedhi
minmy
backy
ard.
Shesentt
hemessageandsi
ghedf
ight
ingt
heur
ge
togobacktohi
shouse.
*
**

Thefoll
owi ngmor ni
ng,Aronawokeupt otherough
knockont hedoor .Hegotof ft
hecouchandputon
hissweatpantsthenwal kedtothedoorandopened.
Hisbrotherslookedathimt henlookedbehi
ndhim
i
nsidethehouse.
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”
Maatl
asmi l
edinnocent
ly.“
Nyaa,
retsi
legogocheka
hel
alai
taka.(
Nahwej ustcametocheckuponyou.)
”
At
sil
eshookhi
shead.“
Okae?
”
“
Mang?
”
“
Kenny
.”
“
Ist
hatwhaty
oucameher
efor
?”
Maatlascr
atchedhishead.“
Nah,
wej
ustcamet
o
checkupony ou.
.”
“
Shoul
dn’
tyout
wobeawor
k?”
Atsi
lepeakedi
nsi
dethehouseagai
n.“
Wecameher
e
toseeher?Okae?”
“
Shei
ssl
eepi
ng.Tsamay
angt
lebanna!
”
Thebrothersl
ookedateachot herthenwalked
i
nsidethehouse,theyl
ookedathi sduvetonthe
couchthentur
nedt ohi
m beforesitti
ng.Aronashook
hi
sheadt henpickedhi
st-shi
rtandputi ton.
“
Maatl
ashoul
dn’
tyoubewi
thy
ourf
ami
l
y?Cany
ou
l
eav
e?”
Thebedroom dooropenedt henKennywalkedout
.
Theyallkeptquietstaringatherwhil
eshealso
st
aredbackatt hem t akingastepback.Ar
ona
walkedovertoher .
“
Theyar
eleav
ing.
”
Atsi
legotup.“HiKenny,Iam Atsil
e,hi
sy ounger
brot
her.That
’sMaatla,
ourol derbrot
her.It
’sa
pl
easuretofi
nall
ymeety ou.Notthebestwayt o
meetoursisteri
n-l
awbutwewi lldobett
ernext
ti
me.”
Maat
lal
ookedatKennyt
hensmi
l
edgl
anci
ngathi
s
br
othert
henst
ret
chedhi
shandt
oKenny
.
“Don’
tmindthi
sone.Wear esorr
ytowakeyouup
withsomuchnoise,
it’
snotalwaysl
iket
his.
”Kenny
swall
owedthenshookhishand.
At
sil
elookedatArona.“
Osuregor
eketypeyagago?
Omontlethat
akana.(Arey
ousureshei
syourtype?
Shi
stoobeautif
ul.
””
Kennyshy
lysmi
l
ed.
Ar
onapushedhi
sbr
other
sout
side.
“
Tsamay
ang!(
Leav
e!)
”
At
sil
esmi
l
ed.“
Shei
sreal
l
ypr
ett
y.”
Maatl
anodded.“
Sheis,
andyoung.Youcant
rai
n
t
hisoneandmouldheri
ntobei
ngwhatyouwant.
”
Aronashookhi
sheadwalki
ngbacki
nsi
dethehouse
thenl
ookedatKennywhowassit
ti
ngonthecouch.
“
Sor
ryaboutt
hat
.Theyar
ecr
azy
.”
“
It
’sok.Whydi
dtheycal
lmet
hei
rsi
steri
n-l
aw?
”
“TheydothatwheneverIhaveafemal
efri
end.They
arenosey
.Letmet akeaquickshowert
henwego. ”
“
Ok.
”

*
**

Awhilel
atershesati
nthefrontseatwhi
lehedr
ove
hert
oschool sot
osortoutsomemat ter
s.
“
Soar
eyoust
ayi
ngatcampus?
”
“Yes.Idon’
thav
emoneyt
orentahouse.Ihear
dit
’s
expensive.
”
“Noit
’snot.Somepeopleact
uall
ymakestudents
paywayless.Youjusthav
etolook.Mat
teroffactI
wil
lhelpyoulook.
”
“
Howmuchdoy
out
hinki
tcanbe?
”
“
Cheap.Iwi
l
lhel
pyoul
ook.
”
“
Thanky
ouabut
hiAr
ona.
”
Hegav
eheral
ookt
henshel
aughed.“
Sor
ry.
”
“
Otl
aswabaKenny
.”
“
Canwepassbyt
hemal
l
,If
orgotmyl
oti
on.
”
“Iwaswonder
ingwhousedmyl
oti
onmmemot
ho
kewena!
”
“
Shar
ingi
scar
ing.
”
Helookedatherwit
hasmil
ethenpl
ayedasong
dr
ivi
ngtoGameCi t
yMal
l.

*
**

Meanwhi l
eCandywatchedasArona’scardrov
eoff
attheotherl
anewithKennyl
aughingatsomething
whilehespoke.Shesl
oweddownt henparkedbythe
nextbusstop.Sheswall
owedhardputti
ngherhands
onherface.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#14

Duri
ngherlunchbr
eak,Sel
etsosatwit
hLoloasthey
at
emagwi nyaandsoupwhilethepr
eschoolki
ds
pl
ayed.
“
Sohei
srewr
it
inghi
sfor
m 5?
”
“
Yes,
hegotmot
ivat
edbyhi
sfr
iendget
ti
ngaj
ob.
”
“
Sowhat’
sgoingtohappenwhent
hebabycomes?
Wil
lhemanagekaP1800?”
“
That
’snothi
ssal
aryLol
o.”
“
Iam sur
eit
’ssomet
hingcl
osert
othatamount
.”
“
Wow!Ican’
tbel
i
evet
his.
”
“Iam beingser
ious.Kanaal r
eadyyouar
etheone
buyi
ngf oodandstuffsincey oumovedi
nwithhi
m.
Youar edoingevery
thing,enewhatdoeshedohel
a
expecteatandfucky ou?”
“Lol
oifyouhav
enothi
ngposi
ti
vet
osaypleasedon’
t
sayital
l
.Youalway
sfi
ndwaystodegr
ademyman
everydayandmay beourf r
iendshi
pshouldcomet o
anendbecauseIcan’tdiscussany t
hingwit
hy ou
becauseyourmout hcan’tf
indanythi
ngpositi
veto
sayaboutmyr el
ati
onship.It’
salwaysonethi
ngaf t
er
another
,Ihavetr
iedtoignoreitbutIcan’
tanymore.”
Lolosighed.“
Iam sorr
yift
hati
showIam coming
across.Iam j
ustt
ryi
ngt omakeyouseewhatt
hered
fl
agsy oukeepref
usingtosee.
“
“IcanseewhatIam doing.Iam anadult
.Ican’
t
alwaysbedeali
ngwiththi
s.Youareli
keanegat i
ve
blockinmyli
fereadytopullmedowneachchance
youget.Ihavet
ogoandsor toutt
hestudent’
s
report
s.Bye.
”
Selet
sostoodupandwal kedt
oherclasswi
thher
food.Shethought
ful
l
ylookedatherphonet
hen
call
edhim.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
…howi
syourday
?”
“
It
’sgood.Iser
vedawhi
temant
odayandhet
ipped
meP300!”
“
Wow!
”
“Yeah.Hewasni
ce.Iwi
shImeetsuchpeopl
e
everyday
.”
Sel
etsol
aughedl
ist
eningtohi
mtalkhappi
l
y.“
Iwi
sh
weallmetni
cepeopleal
lthet
ime.
”
“
Iwi
l
lbuyt
hoseboot
sIsawt
hatt
ime,
fort
hebaby
.”
Sel
etsosmi
l
ed.“
Ok.
”
“Heownsacoupleofbusi
nesses,
hesai
dhei
sneed
ofadri
verandhewil
lcal
lme.”
“
Wow!
”
“
Eish,
Iwantt
ojumpl
i
keachi
l
d.”
Seletsol
aughed.“
Iam happyfory
oubabe,i
fhecan
ti
py ouP300thenIam surehecanpayagood
amount .
”
“
Mypoi
ntexact
ly.Iam sohappy
.”
“
Met
oo.Youj
ustpi
ckedmymood.
”
“
Howi
syourday
?”
“
Iam onmyl
unchbr
eakandmyf
eetar
eabi
t
swol
l
en.
”
“
Iwi
l
lmassagey
ouwhenIgethome.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Ihav
etogo,
seey
ou.
”
“Il
ove-“Hehungupt hensheputherphonedown
wit
hasmi le.Healwayshungupasifhewast heone
whohadcal l
ed.Withhermoodrisi
ng,shestar
ted
sorti
ngthestudent
’srepor
tsf
orreportcol
l
ecti
onthe
fol
lowingday.

*
**

AtAr ona’
sworkplace,Arona’sPAsor t
edoutafew
thi
ngsonherbossest able,thedooropenedthenMr.
Mbaki wa’
sdaughterwalkedi nsmil
ing,i
twasan
easyguess,shehadbeent oldallabouther
.ThePA
smiledstari
ngather.
“
MsMbaki
wa.
”
Candysmi
l
edconf
used.“
Uhhhi
?Ishei
n?”
“
No,
het
ookadayof
ftoday
.”
“
Ohy
eah…ok,
thanks.
”
“
Iwi
l
ltel
lhi
myoucameby
.”
“
No,
don’
t,
it’
sok.Iwi
l
ljustcal
lhi
m.Thanks.
”
“
Youar
ewel
come.
”
“
What
’sy
ourname?
”
“
Resego.
”
“
Ok,
bye.
”
Sheturnedandwal
kedout.Resegowalkedt
oher
deskasawor kmat
ewalkedov er
.“Fi
nall
ymether
ri
ght?
”
Resegosmi
l
ed.“
Wow!
”
“
Youcansayt
hatagai
n.”
“
MmeeneleMr.Wal
kerbamat
cher
.(SheandMr
.
Wal
kermat
ch.
)”
“
Bacut egorethoughIneverunder
standtheir
r
elati
onshi
pv i
be,may bet
heyarekeepingitunder
wrapsbecauseofy ouknowwho.Readyf orlunch?
”
“
Yeah.
”
Resegogotherhandbagthenwal
kedoutwi
tha
col
leaguewhi
letheychat
ted.

*
**

Tshenolowalkedf r
om thehospitalwit
hhercar d
shoveddeepinherbagwhi l
eholdingherumbr ell
a
overherhead.Thedoct or
’swordswer est i
l
lringing
i
nherhead.Shebl i
nkedawayhert earswalking
homet henherphoner ang.Shelookedather
mother’scal
lthenwai t
edforittostopringi
ngbef or
e
swit
chingitoff.ALandcruiserstoppedinfrontof
herthenthedriverrol
l
eddownhi swindowsmi l
ingat
her.
Tshenoloheldherbagpr
operl
ywalkingpastt
hecar
,
thedri
verstart
eddri
vi
ngslowl
ybesideher.
“
Hi…”
“
Dumel
ang.
”
“
CanIgi
vey
oual
i
ft?
”
“
No.Iam f
inet
hanky
ou.
”
“
Comeon,
it’
shot
,youwi
l
lfai
nt.
”
“
Iam f
ine.
”
“
Youwantt odieunderthesun?AndIjustsawyou
wal
kingoutofthehospitalwi
tht
hewayy ouare
wal
kingIcantell
somethi ngi
swrong.Iam j
ust
t
ryi
ngtohelp.That’
sall
.”
Tshenol
osi
ghedt
hengoti
nthecar
.“Thanky
ou.
”
“
Youar
ewel
come.Byt
hewayI
’
m Tebat
so.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hesmi
l
eddr
ivi
ngof
f.“
What
’sy
ourname?
”
Shefixedhercapmakingsur
eherf
acewashi
dden
beneath.“
Oh..Tshenol
o.”
Awhil
elat
erhestoppedwher
eTshenol
otol
dhi
mt o
st
op.“
Wherey ougoi
ngtowal
kall
thewayfr
om t
he
cl
i
nict
il
lhere?
”
“
Yes.I
t’
sawal
kabl
edi
stance.
”
“
It
’sal
ongway
.Iam gl
adt
ohav
ehel
ped.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Shesteppedoutt
hentookherumbrell
a.Herhear
t
ski
ppedasshelookedatthehugestai
nonthewhite
l
eatherseat
s.
“
OhmyGod…”
Shequickl
ytookof
fherj
erseyandst
art
edwi
pingi
t
offf
ranti
cal
ly
.
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
Tebatsost
eppedoutandwalkedroundt
hecar
wherehenoti
cedalsothest
ainonherbut
t.
“Tshenol
o,i
t’
sok.I
thappens.Iunder
stand.Ihav
ea
sist
erok?”
Sheshookherheadcr
ying.“
Iam sor
ry.
”
Hehuggedherf
rom behi
nd.“
Igoty
ou.I
t’
sok.
”
“
Itj
ustwon’
tst
op.
”
Helookedar
oundthenhel
pedherbacki
nsi
det
he
car
.“I
t’
sok.Don’
tcry.
”
Hercapf
ell
,hewi
pedawayhert
ears.“
Don’
tcry.
Womenstai
nthemsel
vesf
rom t
imetotimeagai
n.I
t
happens.Iunder
stand.
”
Tshenoloshookherhead.“
Itwon’
tst
op.I
twon’
t
st
op.Ijustwanttodi
e.”
Tebatsopickedherbagandumbrell
athenhanded
them toherbefor
eclosi
ngherdoorandjumping
backinthecar.
“
Shoul
dIdr
opy
ouof
faty
ourhouse?
”
“
Mamawi
l
lshout
.”
“
Ok,
whatdoy
oumeani
twon’
tst
op?
”
“Thebl
eedi
ng.Itst
opsf
oracoupl
eofday
sthen
star
tsagai
n.”
“Wowf uck!Ok,whatdoyouneedmetodo?Ican
dropyouof fnear
byoratafri
end’
shousesoyou
canchange.How’ st
hat?
”
“
Myfri
endi
snotar
ound.Shewentt
oGabor
one
y
est
erdayf
orv
arsi
ty.
”
“
ThenIwi
l
ldr
opy
ounear
byy
ourhouse.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hest
art
edt
hecart
henshedi
rect
edhi
m.He
st
oppedt
henshet
iedherj
ackett
oherwai
st.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“Youcangi
vemey
ournumber
.Mysi
steri
sadoct
or.
Shecanhel
p.”
“Oh.
.”Hegaveherthenumbert
henst
eppedoutwi
th
hert
hingsandwalkedhome.

*
**

Tshenol
owalkedi
nthehouseandgotwel
comedby
aslapacr
ossherf
ace.
“
Soy
ouar
ebackati
tagai
n?”
“
Mama?
”
“
Ifi
t’
saspir
itofwhoreness,
Iwi
ll
beatitoutofy
ou!
Otswakae?(Whereareyoucomingf
rom? )
”
“
Iwentt
othehospi
tal
.”
“
Sot
hatcart
haty
ouj
ustgotof
fkey
amang?
”
“
Hegav
eme-
“
“Idon’
tknowwhattodowit
hy ouanymore.Wa
ntenaTshenol
o!Can’ty
ouj
uststayawayfr
om men!
Justonceinyourl
if
e!”
Tshenoloheldhercheekcr yingwhilehermot her
shouted.Awhilelatershewal kedtoherroom and
satont hebed.Withhermi ndmadeup, shewr ot
ea
l
ongl ett
eraddressedatherpar entsthengrabbed
herskippingr
opef rom underneaththebedand
walkedoutoft hehousegoi ngtothebacky ar
d.

*
**

Lateronthatdayj ustaft
erdawn, Kennywat chedas
Aronapaidf orthegroceryassheat eherSimba
chips.Anotherstoreworkerpackedt hegrocer i
esi
n
plasti
csplacingthem inthetr
oll
ey .Thecashi er
smi l
edathim handinghimt hereceipttoget
herwi t
h
hi
scar d.
“
Thanky
ouf
orshoppi
ngwi
thus.
”
“
Yahsur
e.”
Ar
onapushedt
het
rol
l
eyasKennywal
kedbesi
de
hi
m.
“
Youdon’
twantany
thi
ng?
”
Sheshookherhead.“
NoIam good.
”
Theywentt
othecarwher
eheputev
ery
thi
ngi
nthe
boot
.
“
Wai
tforme,
Iam comi
ng.
”
“
Ok.
”
Kennygotint
hecarashedi sappearedbackinsi
de
themall
.Acarpul
ledov erbesi
deArona’sthena
mansteppedoutstari
ngatherHeknockedonher
windowthensheroll
eddownt hewindow.
“
Hi,
youar
ebeaut
if
ul.
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Thanky
ou.
”
“CanIhav
eyournumber
?May
bewecangoout
someti
me.”
Kennyl
ookedatthemani
nthesui
twhi
chagl
i
tter
ing
watchonhi
swrist.
“
Uhh…I
…”
Hereachedov
erandtookherphonefr
om herl
ap
t
henpagedhimsel
f.Hegaveherbacktheboyf
ri
end.
“Ekaeboyf
riendy
agago?(
Wher
eisy
our
boi
ufri
end?
)”
“
Idon’
thav
e.”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Iam Ki
ngok?
”
“
Eer
ra.
”
AronawalkedbackasKingwalkedawayr
oom
taki
ngouthisphonefrom hi
spocket
.Hegotbacki
n
thecarandlookedatKenny.
“
Whatwashedoi
ng?
”
“
Huh?
”
“
Thatguy
…whatwashedoi
ng?
”
“
Hewant
edmynumber
.”
“
For
?”
“
Idon’
tknow.
”
Hequi
etl
yhandedheraForschi
nishoppingbagthen
r
ever
sedanddroveoff
.Kennylookedinsi
dethenshe
tookouttheheel
sshehadseenear
li
eron.She
smiledst
ari
ngathim.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Yah.
”
Kenny’
sphoner
angf
rom herl
apt
henshepi
cked.
“Hel
lo?
”
“
Hey
,it
’sKi
ng,
whowast
hat
?”
“
Myf
ri
end.
”
“
Ok,
hopef
ull
yhedoesn’
tmindmet
aki
ngy
ouout
t
omorr
ow,l
et’
ssayl
unch?”
Ar
onasnat
chedherphone.
“
Otl
anyel
aomarete,i
fyoucal
lheragai
n,Iam goi
ng
t
opunchy
ou.Nxl
a.”
Hehungupt
henbl
ockedanddel
etedt
henumber
.
“Whyar
ey ougiv
inghi
my ournumber
?Doyouknow
hi
m?Whati fheisahumantraf
fi
cker
?What
’sso
i
nter
est
ingabouthim?”
Kennyl
ookedathi
m unsur
eofwhatt
osay
.“Uh…”
“Doy ouwanthim?Firstdayhelaebileosetseo
nnelabathodinumbar a.Osetseobat l
agoj ol
a.
(Fi
rstdayandalreadyy ouar
egivingoutyour
number .Youal
readywantt odate.)
”
Shamef
ull
y,Kennykeptqui
etwhi
l
ehef
umed.
“I
fIcat
chyouwit
hhi
m oranyoneelse,heisgoi
ngto
knowme.Youcamehereforschoolnotformen!
Focusonwhaty
oucamefor.”
Hepausedst
ari
ngatherphonet
henl
ookedather
agai
n.“
Whatwashesaying?”
“
Hewant
stot
akemeout
.”
“Takeyououtwhere?Youarenotgoi
nganywher
e
withhi
m.Oranyoneelse.Theonl
ythi
ngyouare
goingt
ogooutwi t
hisyourbooks.
”
Heputthephoneinhi
spocketdri
ving.Minut
es
passedthenhel
ookedbackather.“Doyouli
kethe
shoes?”
“
Yes,
thanky
ou.
”
“
Ongadi
l
e?”
Sheshookherhead.
“
Ok.Tomor
rowwewi
l
llookf
ory
ourhouse.
”
Shenodded.
“
Osekawangala,omaswenyanagaongadi
l
e.
(
Don’
tbeangr
y,youl
ookabitugl
ywhenangry.
)”
Unablet
okeepaser
iousf
ace,
shel
aughed.“
Iam
notangr
y.”
Hepinchedhercheekmaki
ngherl
aughsl
appi
nghi
s
hand.“
Leavemeal one.
”
“Sor
ryautl
wa?Iam j
ustl
ooki
ngoutf
ory
ou.Obat
la
dri
nk?(Doyouwantadri
nk?)
”
“
Ng…”
Hehandedherhisdri
nkthenplay
edBlaqDi
amond,
i
bhanoyiandsangforherwhi
leshel
aughedathi
s
hor
ri
blevoice.

Awng'
zok'
thengel
aibhanoy
i
(
MyLov
e)
Awng'
zok'
thengel
aibhanoy
i
(
MyLov
e)
Awng'
zok'
thengel
aibhanoy
i
(
MyLov
e)
Awng'
zok'
thengel
aibhanoy
i
(
MyLov
e)

Awnomabengat
hini
ke
Wenaungowami
ke
Nabaphant
sisebev
umi
l
e
Awngi
thi
sekul
otshi
we
I
khandal
'
vel
el'
dume
Um'
ungekhoeduze
I
-smi
l
esami
sazi
wanguwe
We-
sweet
hear
tmyl
oveweh
Awsebezami
l
ebani
ngi
bet
hisohl
ukanakodwal
ent
o
ay
enzeki
Awbat
hiu-
babeungi
dli
sil
ekant
iabazi
ukut
himi
na
ngi
semat
handweni
Ohi
ndi
zamshi
ni(
ohi
ndi
zamshi
nibabe)

*
**

Hedrovei
nhisy
ardandf
rownedpar
kingnextt
o
Candy’
scar
.
“
Idon’
tknowwhatshei
sdoi
ngher
e.”
“
It
’sok.
”
Shet
ookthehousekeyst
hensteppedoutofthecar
andwal
kedtothedoorwhi
leAr
onaf acedher
.
“
Hey
…”
CandylookedasKennygoti
nsidet
hehouset
hen
cl
earedherthr
oatst
ari
ngathim.
“
Iwantt
otal
ktoy
ouaboutsomet
hing.
”
“
Ok…what
?”
Shet
ookadeepbr
eat
h.“
Ilov
eyou.
”
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#15

Ar
onal
ookedatherather
,Candyl
i
ckedherl
i
ps.
“I
twasn’tpl
anned,i
tjusthappened.It
ri
edt
ofi
ghti
t
butIcan’
tanymore.
”
“
Buty
ouknowhowIf
eel
right
?”
“IknowaboutKenny
.Iknowyoul
i
keherbutIwas
hopingmaybeyouwouldgi
veusachance.
”
Hesmi l
edthentookhishandsi
nhis.“Iadmi
reyour
confi
dence,notev
ery
onecandowhaty oudi
d,Iwish
yourgendercanseethatyoudi
dn’
tdie.”
Candyl
aughed.“
Iam goi
ngt
odi
eassoonasIget
home.”
“
Wewi
l
ljustbur
ryy
oul
i
key
oubur
iedy
ourdog.
”
Shesmi l
edst
ari
ngathimi nfrontofhercar
.He
l
ookedsogood,hesmi l
edt hatchar
mingsmi l
eofhi
s
thatal
wayshadherheartpounding.
“
Tobehonestwi
thy
ou,
Iam i
nlov
ewi
thsomeone
else.Ihav efall
enmuchdeepert hanIthoughtandit
get smener v
ous.Iam notgoingtoli
etoy ou
becauseIknowmy sel
f.WhenIl ovesomeone, my
mi ndisfocusedont hatpersonandnot hi
ngelse.I
j
ustpr eferredusbeingfr
iendsbecauseIsawy ou
l
ikemysi ster.
”
Candyl
ookeddowndi
sappoi
nted.
“Idon’twanttost
ri
ngyoualongnei
therdoIwantt
o
disappointy
oubutIdon’
tfeelt
hesame.”
Candysi
ghed.“
It
’sok.
”
“
Ok?Yougood?
”
Shef
orcedasmi
l
e.“
Yeah.Iam abi
ggi
rl
.”
“
Yousur
e?”
Shelaughed.“Yeah.Iam j
usthappyIknowwher
eI
fal
l
.It’
sbetterthannotknowing.
”
Hesmil
edthenhuggedherf
oracoupl
eofseconds
andl
ethergo.
“Ok.Iam gladwet al
kedaboutt
hislenna.Kennyis
beginni
ngtot hi
nkthatmaybeIam inar el
ati
onshi
p
withyou.Idon’twanttor
uinanyt
hingbecauseIlove
hersomuch.Idon’
tthi
nksheknowsIl
oveherbutI
doandIdon’
twanttoruini
tbef
orei
tst
art
s.”
Candynodded.“
Iunder
stand.Doy
out
hinkshef
eel
s
thesame?”
“Idon’
tknowbutIthinkso.Iam j
usttakingi
tsl
ow
butpeoplearebegi
nningtotakeadvantageoft
hat
gapeIdon’twanttobefri
endzoned.
”
“Thenclai
m whatyouneed.”Sheshrugged.“Bef
ore
youlose.Kennywatengomont lesoIam not
surpr
isedsomepeopl ear
ealreadytur
ningthei
r
necks.”
“
Yeah…y
ouar
eri
ght
.Shar
paker
e?”
“
Yeah.
”
Shegotinhercart henwav edathimr eversi
ng.She
droveforawhi l
et henpl ayedther adiotoki l
lthe
si
lencethathadf il
ledhercar .Asongst artedplayi
ng,
shetookadeepbr eaththenf i
nall
yst oppedand
brokedowncr ying.Asst upidasitf el
t,shewas
cryi
ngforamanwhohadnev ersaidasi ngletoher
aboutarelati
onshi p.Event heirf
ri
endshi pwasn’ t
muchofaf r
iendshi p.Shepausedt hent ookher
phoneandwentthroughthei
rconv
ersat
ionsbef
ore
shestar
tedl
aughingcryi
ng.
“
OhMyGod!What
’swr
ongwi
thme?
”
Shechangedt heradiost
ati
ont oanotherwhereVee
Mampeezy ’ssongwaspl ayi
ng.Sherestar
tedthecar
wipingawayhertearsthendrovehomesi ngi
ngwi t
h
Vee.Shethoughtful
lychangedroutesthendroveto
aliquorst
oreandgotabot tl
eofAmar ulaandfinal
l
y
drovehome.
Atherhousesheconnectedherphonetother
adi
o
pl
ayingsomeCharmagi r
l,choosedaywhi
l
edri
nki
ng
hersorr
owsaway.

*
**

InAr
ona’
skit
chen,Aronaf
ini
shedpackingever
ythi
ng
awaywhi
leKennysli
cedafewthingscooki
ng.
“
Arey
oudone?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Youcanchopt
het
omat
oes.
”
Hesighed.“
Ieattakeaway
sbecauseIdon’
tli
ke
doi
ngsuchthings.”
Kennyrol
ledherey
eshandinghi
mt hechoppi
ng
boardwit
hthetomatoesandkni
fe.
“
Doi
tqui
ckl
y.Ineedt
hem.
”
Hestart
edchoppingst
ari
ngathermov
ear
oundt
he
ki
tcheneff
ort
lessl
y.
“Thegi
rlImetatschool
,Namet
so,sheisal
so
l
ookingforaccommodati
onout
sideschool
campus.
”
“
Youar
enotgoi
ngt
oshar
ewi
thher
.”
“
Why
?”
“Ionceshar edwiththi
sguybackwhenIwasst il
lat
UB.Wheni twasendofmont h,y
ouwi l
lseehi m wit
h
newshoesoranewshi rtorsomethi
ngsi l
lyhela
sagot ur
a, t
henafterIbuymyf ood,youwillseehim
withsobst ori
es.Somet i
mesebilehewoul djust
stealmyf oodtoapoi ntwhereIkeptmyf oodko
neighbori
ngket sabalegodu.”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Notev
ery
onedoest
hat
.”
“Hewouldev
enbringhisgi
rl
fr
iendandsl
eepwi
th
herwhi
leIam i
ntheroom.”
“
Nameseemsni
ce.
”
“Everyper
sonseemsni ce.Justst
ayalone, gapei
t
givesyouthefreedom t
odowhaty ouwantwhen
youwantt odoit.Imagi
neyouwant i
ngtor eadand
someonet el
li
ngy outoswitchoft
helightbecause
theywanttosleep?”
Shelookedathi
stomat
oes.“
Coul
dyoumaket
hem
abitsmall
er?
”
Hel
ookedathi
stomat
oest
henbackather
.
“
Theywi
l
lshr
inkoncey
ouputt
hem i
nsi
det
hepot
.”
“
Ngng,maket
hem smal
l
er.Thoset
hingsar
ejust
t
oobi
g.”
Kenny
’phonerang,hel
ookedatherscr
eent
henshe
tooki
tandansweredwit
hasmi l
e.
“
Kenny
?”
“
Mmama…”
“
Whatdi
dtheyatschool
?”
“Everyt
hingi
sfi
ne.OnMondayIam goi
ngfor
orient
ati
on.Howareyou?Ar
etheyt
reat
ingyou
nicely
?”
“
Iam f
ineKenny
.Ial
readymi
ssy
ou.
”
“
Imi
ssy
out
oo.Di
dyoudr
inky
ourmedi
cat
ion?
”
“Yes.Ial
readydrankthem.Iam r
eal
l
yhappyyouare
nowatuni ver
sit
y.Youaregoingt
oachi
evegr
eater
thi
ngsf r
om ther
e.”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Thanky
oummama.
”
“
SocanIspeakt
oyourfr
iendwhom y
ouar
est
ayi
ng
wi
thatt
hemeanti
me.”
“
Uh…shei
ssl
eepi
ng.
”
“
Alr
eady
?Shei
sal
way
sunav
ail
abl
e.”
“
Uhy
es.She…shei
sabusyper
son.
”
“
Kennyweh?
”
“
Ma?
”
“
Irai
sedy
ou.Iknowi
twheny
ouar
ely
ing.Letme
t
alkt
ohi
m.”
“
Ma?
”
“
Youhear
dme.
”
Kennyhesi
tant
lygav
eAr
onat
hephone.
“
Hel
l
o?”
Heputt hekni
fedownandwalkedoutwhil
eshe
anxiousl
ywaitedt
ohearwhathergrandmot
herhad
said.Hewalkedbacki
nminutesl
aterwit
hasmile
thenhandedKennythephoneback.
“
Whatdi
dshesay
?”
“
It
’snonofy
ourbusi
ness.Butshel
i
kesmeal
ready
.”
“
Shedoes?
”
“
Yeah.Whyar
eyousowor
ri
ed?
”
“
BecauseIhadl
i
edt
oher
.”
“
Isor
tedi
tout
.Don’
twor
ryabouti
t.
”
Shesmil
edst
ari
ngathi
m,somehowhim say
ingt
hat
wasenoughf
orhert
ostopwor
ryi
ng.“
Ok.”
Hel
ookedatherl
i
pst
henatherf
acewhi
l
eshe
smiledathi
m.Herphoner
angagai
ninherhands
thensheanswer
ed.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,it
’sKi
ng.I
shet
her
e?”
Kennyswall
owedstari
ngatAr
onawhonot
iceda
fl
ashoffeari
nhereyes.
“
Ramf anaoorekareot
lany
ela,obat
lagontena
y
aanong.Ebi
l
et el
lhi
myouareinarel
ati
onshi
p.”
Kennynodded.“
Iam i
nar
elat
ionshi
p.”
Ki
ngchuckl
ed.“
Ishemaki
ngy
ousayt
hat
?”
“
No.Pl
easedon’
tcal
lme.Goodni
ght
.”
“
Heywai
t…Iwi
l
lcal
lyout
omor
row.Ok?
”
Shehungup.Ar
onawal
kedovertoherthent ookher
phoneandputi
tont
hekit
chencounter
st i
l
tingher
chi
n.
“
CanIbehonestwi
thy
ou?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Iwasgoi
ngt
obepat
ientandt
akei
tsl
owbutIdon’
t
thi
nkIcandoitanymore.Il
ovey ouandIwanta
seri
ousrel
ati
onshi
pwithyou.IthoughtmaybeI
wouldwaitanddothi
ngsdiff
erentl
ybutIcan’
t
anymore.Youhearme?”
Shenoddedspeechl ess.Hel eanedoverandki
ssed
her,hi
smout hsweepingher s.Kenny’shear
t
poundedasheki ssedhersogoodherpant i
es
drenched.Hekissedherev enmor epicki
ngherup
thenplacedherontheki t
chencount ers.
Hepausedt
henl
ookedi
nherey
es.
“Keagor at
aKennyandIwantsomet hingser ious.I
f
youknowy our sel
fandy ouknowy oudon’ twantt he
samet hi
ngasIwant ,t
hat ’
sstil
lok.Wewi llj
ustbe
fri
endsandmov eon.Buti fyouwantt hist henI
expecty ougi vi
ngmeny ournumbert ost op.Iwi l
l
wantf ait
hfulnessfrom you, i
fyouknowy oucan’ t
bri
ngt hattot hetable,
it’
sfine.Wecanst ickto
fri
endshipbecauseIdon’ twanttogot oj ailfor
passionki l
l
ing.Whatdoy ouwant ?”

*
**
AtMot husi’
shouse, SeletsolookedatMot husi who
wasbusyonhi sbookswhi l
eshedeepf ri
edchi cken.
Shesmi l
edt henr eachedf orhisphoneont hebedt o
hotspotherself.Shecuriouslyopenedhi smessages
whileheread, hisbackturnedonher .Finall
yshe
openedhi sgallerywithasmi lethenpausedst aring
atKenny ’
spictureswhi l
ehersmi l
edisappear ed.She
wentthroughhi sent i
rephonei ncludi
nghi scall l
og
thenshookherheadt r
yingtocont rolherself
.Unabl e
tocontainherself,shestoodup.
“
Mot
husi
!”
Heturnedt
ohert
henl
ookedathi
sphonei
nher
hands.
“
Whati
sit
?”
“
Whatar
eyout
alki
ngt
oKennyf
or?
”
“
What
?”
“
Whatareyoutalki
ngtoKennyfor
?Didn’
tyousay
y
oulongstoppedtal
ki
ngt oher
?Youcall
edher
y
est
erdayandspokewi t
hherover10minut
es.What
wer
eyoudi
scussi
ng?
”
“
It
’snothing.Iwasj
ustcongr
atul
ati
ngherongoi
ng
t
ouniversit
y.”
“Why?Yousai
dyouwoul
dnev
ert
alkt
oher
!Ar
eyou
cheat
ingonmewit
hher?
”
“
Ify
out
hinkIam l
yi
ngcal
lhert
hen.
”
“Iam notgoi ngtocal
lhersoyoumakemel ook
stupidinfrontofher,
youaregoingtot
ellmethe
truth.Iam notgoingtobeanotherf
oolandbeused!
Ar eyoucheat i
ngonme? ”
“
No.
”
“
Whyar
eyoul
yi
ngt
ome?
”
“
Youar
ebegi
nni
ngt
osoundcr
azyr
ightnow.
”
“OhhhsoIam cr
azy
?Iam cr
azy
?Youhav
en’
tseen
crazy
.”
Angr
il
yshegrabbedakni
feandpoint
edi
tathi
m.“
If
youdon’
ttel
lmethetr
uthIam ki
l
li
ngmysel
f.
”
Hegotup.“
Babewhatar
eyoudoi
ng?
”
“
AREYOUCHEATI
NGONME?
!”
“
Cany
oust
opi
t?”
“
Iam goi
ngt
oki
l
lmy
sel
fify
oudon’
ttel
lmet
he
t
rut
h.”
Mothusil
ookedathert
henqui
ckl
ysnat
chedt
he
kni
fefr
om her.
“
Stopi
t!
”
Heputtheknifeawaythenwentbackt
ohisbooks.
Selet
sotookthepotwiththeboi
l
ingoi
lonthest
ove
thenspl
ashedhim wi
thit.
.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#16

Mot husiy el
pedjumpingf
all
ingof fthechairashis
tablealsof el
lwit
hhisbooks.Seletsolookedathim
ont hefloorholdi
ngthepot,shaking.Shedr opped
thepotf rozentoherspotwhileMot husigrunted
try
ingtot akeoffhist
-shi
rt
.
Sherushedt
ogetasci
ssorthencuti
tfr
om t
heback
buti
twasnowstuckonhisskin.
“
It
’sst
uck.
”
“
It
’spai
nful
.Goandcal
lRast
asot
hathet
akesmet
o
t
hehospit
al.
”
Sel
etsoswal
l
owed.“
Youcan’
tgot
othehospi
tal
.”
“
Iam i
npai
nSel
etso!
”
“Theywill
knowwhathappenedandtheywi
l
l l
abel
me.Theyar egoingtocal
lmenames.
”Tearsfi
ll
ed
hereyes.“Theyaregoi
ngtoi
nsul
tme.”
“
Iwi
l
lgoal
one.Youcanst
aybehi
nd.
”
“Rast
awi
l
lknow.Let
’sj
ustgety
ouat
axi
.Iwi
l
lcal
la
cab.”
Shetookherphonewhil
eherhandsshookand
di
aledacab’snumberwhil
eMothusigr
untedi
npai
n
st
il
lonthefl
oor.

*
**

Atthehospi
tal
,thenur
seattendedtoMuthusi
’s
woundswhil
eSel et
sostoodbywithherhandsover
herbel
ly
.
“
Howdi
dyougetbur
nyour
sel
fwi
tht
heoi
l
?”
Mothusichuckl
ed.“
Ihadpl
acedt
hepotont
opoft
he
f
ri
dget henitf
ell
onme.”
Thenur sel
ookedatSel
etsot
hensmi
l
edhandi
ngher
prescr
ipti
oncard.
“
Goandgett
hisatt
hedi
spensar
y.”
“
Oh,
ishedone?
”
“
No,
almost
.Goandgett
hepi
l
ls.
”
Sel
etsonoddedt
hentooktheprescr
ipt
ioncar
dand
wal
kedout.Thenur
sesighed.
“ThankGodt
heoildi
dn’
tbur
ny oumuch,i
fitdi
d,we
wouldbesay
ingsomethi
ngtot
all
ydi
ffer
entri
ght
now.”
Henodded.“
Thanky
ou.
”
“MynameisAngel
a.Shebur
nty
oudi
dn’
tshe?Ican
seei
tinherey
es.
”
“
No.
”
“Youdon’
thav
et ol
i
et omebutyouhavet
oknowif
shecanburnyouwit
hoilt
henwhatel
secanshedo.
”
“I
t’
sprobabl
ythehormones.Shei
spr
egnantandI
don’
tblameher.Il
i
edtoher.”
Angelashrugged.“
Peopl
ehavefi
ghtsever
ydaybut
thatdoesn’
tmeanwebur neachot
herwithoi
l.And
pregnantwomencancontrolt
hemselv
es.Shedidi
t
knowingly
.”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Butany
who,
youar
egoi
ngt
obef
ine.
”
Mot
husi
lookedatherandnodded.“
Thanks.
”
“
Justdoi
ngmyj
ob.
”
Minuteslat
erSeletsowal
kedbackinwiththepil
ls.
Angelaexplai
nedhowhewassupposedt odri
nk
them thent
heyfinall
ywal
kedout.Sel
etsolookedat
him.
“
Whatwer
eyout
wot
alki
ngabout
?WhenIl
eft
?”
“
Not
hing.
”
Shenoddedwal kingbesi dehi mtil
l t
heywer eout si
de.
“Shewasl ookingatmei naf unnyway .
”Tear sfil
led
herey es.“
Iam sor ryIburnty ouwi thoil.Idon’tknow
whatgotov erme.Ihav enev erbeenav iol
entper son
before.”Sheputherhandsov erherf acecr yi
ng.“ I
havejustbeenhur tbeforeandIkeepexpect ingy ou
to.Ikeepexpectingy out ocheatorgobackt oy our
exort oimpregnat esomeoneel se.Iam scar edy ou
don’tlovemeenoughandt hatIam l ovingway
harderasusual andImi ghtturny ouof f.Iam att hat
stagewher eIjustwantt hi
st owor ksobadbecause
Iknowwhatpeopl ear egoingt osayi fi
tdoesn’ t
,
whatt heywil
lsayaboutme.Imi ghtjustki l
lmy self
becauseIdon’tt hinkIwi l
lhandlet hisrelati
onship
comi
ngt
oanend.Thi
sist
hel
ast
.”
Mot husi l
ookedathert hensi ghedandhuggedher .“I
l
ov ey ou.Youdon’ thav et osecondguesst hat.IfI
didn’tIwoul dn’
tbewast ingmyt imewi thyou.I
call
edKennyev ent houghIsai dIwoul dnevertalkto
you.Idi dn’
tjustcongr atulateher ,Ialsoapologi
zed
forhowt hi
ngsended.Iapol ogizedf orhurt
ingher
that’
swhyt heconv ersationst ookt ime.Ihavebeen
feeli
nggui l
tyov erwhathappenedandIwant edt o
apologizet oher.Iam sor r
yf orkeepi ngherpict
ures
i
nmyphone.Iwi l
ldeletet hem. ”
Selet
sonoddedcryi
ng.Mot
husir
ubbedherback
thentookherhandandl
edhert
othebusstopwhil
e
shesniff
ed.
“
Mamawasaski
ngwheny
ouar
epay
ingbogadi
for
t
hebaby
.”
“
Idon’
thavemoney
,youknowIusedt
hatmoneyf
or
t
heregi
str
ati
on.
”
“
Ihavesomemoneysavedup.Wecanuset
hat
.I
wantourbabyt
ousey
oursurname.
”
“
Ican’
ttakey
ourmoney
.Can’
tyourf
ami
l
yjustwai
t
t
il
lI-
“
“Iam bor
rowingitt
oy ou.Li
kealoan.Ihavebeen
savi
ngsinceIstart
edwor ki
ngbecauseIwantedto
star
tbuil
dingmyhouse.Iwi l
lgi
veyouthatmoneyso
youcanpaybogadi forthebaby
.Orbetteryet
,marr
y
me.Ourchi l
ddeservestobeborninamar r
iedhome.
Isavedupt oP17k.I
t’senoughforyoutopay
magadi f
orme.”
Shocked, Mothusil
ookedather.“Ican’tmarr
yyou
withyourownmoney .Iwil
lmarryyouwhenIsav ed
enought omar r
yyou,menothav ingmoneyt omarry
youjustmeansIam notf ini
cal
lystabletoget
mar r
iedyet.Eit
herway,Idon’
tthinkIam readyt
oget
mar r
ied.Iam notpayi
ngbogadi formychildusi
ng
yourmoney .Hewi l
lj
ustusemysur namethenIwil
l
payaf t
er.
”
“
WhydoIf
eel
li
key
ouj
ustdon’
twantt
omar
ryme?
”
“
Canwenotdot
his?Iam i
npai
n.”
“
No,l
et’
stal
kabouti
t,don’
tyouwantt
oget
mar
ri
ed?”
“
IdobutIdon’
thav
emoneyt
ori
ghtnow.
”
“AndIam tel
l
ingy ouIhavemoneysavedup.Wecan
getmarri
edwiththatmoneyandy ouwil
lpayitback.
Mysisteri
smar r
ied,shegavebi
rthmarr
ied.Ican’
t
gohomebecauseIam const ant
lybei
ngcompar ed
toher
.Can’tyoujustmarryme?”
“Sel
etsoyouarenoty
oursist
erandIam noty
our
sist
er’
shusband.Wewil
lgetmarri
edatourown
ti
me.”
Tear
sfil
l
edherey
es.“
Whydon’
tyouwantt
oget
marr
ied?”
“
Cany
oust
opt
his?
”
Sil
ent
ly,
Selet
sonoddedwipi
ngawayhert
ear
swhi
l
e
theywai
tedfort
ranspor
t.

*
**

Tshenolo’
sfat
herwal
kedinsi
dethehouseandf
aced
hi
swi f
ewhowaswat chi
ngTV, unbot
her
ed.
“
Wher
eisTshenol
o?”
“
Inherr
oom.
”
Hewalkedt
oTshenol
o’sbedr
oom t
henwal
kedin
andst
aredatt
heroom f
orawhil
ebefor
ewalki
ng
out
.
“Pl
easecomeandpoi
nthert
omebecauseIcan’
t
seem t
ofindher
.May
bemyey eshav
eaprobl
em.”
Hiswif
est
oodupthenwalkedt
oTshenol
o’s
bedr
oom.Shef
rownedthentur
nedt
oherhusband.
“
Shewasher
e.”
“
Whatki
ndofawomanar
eyou?
“
Whatar
eyout
alki
ngaboutr
ragweNol
o?”
“Iam tal
ki
ngaboutwhathasbeengoi
ngi
nmyhouse
behindmyback!Tshenol
osentmeamessage.
”He
tookouthisphoneandgavei
ttoher.
Nolo:MonthsbackIwasi nar elat
ionshi
pwi t
haman,
Idi
dn’tknowhewasmar ried.Hiswifewantedtosue
me, t
hat’
swhenshet ookt hevideothatwasont he
i
nternet
.Iwasgoingtopr esschargesbuttheman
thr
eatenedtokil
lmeifhiswi fewenttojail
.Months
aft
erthatIfoundoutthatIwaspr egnant,
Ibought
abortionpill
stoki l
lthebaby .Thebabydi edand
mamat oldmenott ot ellyou.Ihav en’tstopped
bleedingsince.Thepai nisunbear able.Itpainsme
toknowt hatIdisappoint edy ouandmama, Iknow
youonl ywant edwhatwasbestf ormeandy oudid
nothingwr ong,ifanything, Iwast hewor stdaughter
youhav egot t
en.Ican’ tgoonl iket hisany more
though.Thepai nistoomuch, Ican’ tdoany thi
ng,I
can’tevengot othehospi t
al becausepeopl ewill
see
meandt heywi llt
alkaboutourf ami ly.I
t’
sbestifI
diebecauset heny ouwon’ thav et odeal wi t
hmy
embar rassment .Yours, Tshenol o.”
“
Wher
eismydaught
er?
”
Tshenol
o’smot
herputherhandshaki
ng.“
Shewas
here.
”
“
Thenwher
edi
dshego?
”
“
Idon’
tknow.Idi
dn’
tseeherl
eav
e.”
“Thi
sisal l
becauseofyou.Youmakeherlivelikea
slav
e.Shei sachil
d,shemakesmi st
akessoshecan
l
earn,that’
swhatbeingachil
dis.Youtol
dmeshe
hadfibrousthat
’swhysheisbleedi
ngli
kethis.You
makemesoundl ikeascar ymonstertomydaughter
.
OfIam causeIam di sappoint
edbutIsti
ll
loveher
muchf orsheisallIgot.That’
smypr i
deandno
matterwhat,Icannev erhateher
.Theproblem i
s
you.It
’sal
way sbeeny ou.”
“
Iwasdoi
ngwhatwasbestf
orher
.”
“
Todaywhat
’sbestf
orherist
her
easonwhyshe
want
stocommitsui
cide”
Hewal
kedout
.
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“
Iam goi
ngtolookformydaught
er.Idon’
tknow
whatki
ndofawomany ouarebutthi
sisnotthe
womanImarri
ed.”
MmagweTshenol oworri
edlywal kedbackinsi
de
Tshenolo’sr
oom andlookedar ound.Shetookthe
l
etteronthebedandreadt hroughi t
.Shewalkedout
andwentt othebacky
ardwher eTshenol ousuall
y
l
ikedsit
tingreadi
ngoneofhernov els.
“
Nol
o!”
Shel
ookedar
oundt
hebacky
ardast
hel
i
ght
s
showedevery
thi
ng.Herhear
tski
ppedasshelayher
eyesonherdaught
erwholyi
ngunderthetr
ee
surr
oundedbymulti
pleempt
ycontai
nersofpi
ll
sand
aropebesi
deher.

*
**

Kefil
wepr eparedherhusband’ sfoodthenwal ked
withittothebedr oom wherehewasseat edont he
bedwhi lethekidssleptintheirr
oom.Dr unk,hetook
thefoodt ogetherwiththejuiceandstartedeat i
ng.
Stari
ngathi mt hatmomentsher eal
izedj usthowf ar
muchol derhewasf rom her.Nowshewonder ed
whathadat t
ractedhimt oherinthefirstplace…his
car…y es.itwashi scar
.Shesmi ledshaki ngher
head, hi
sshinywhi tecarhadbeenwhatdr ewherto
himt henherf i
ndingouthecoul dtakecar eofher .
Nowwi ththeal
cohol,
helookedwayol der
.She
sighedandwatchedhim eatal
lofhisf
ood.Whenhe
wasdonehet hrewtheplatesonthefl
oorbreaki
ng
them.
“Atl
easty
oucancook.Besi
dest
haty
ouar
eusel
ess.
Youshoul
dhavedi
ed.”
Kef
il
wesmi l
ed.“
Oh…nowlet
’sseewho’
sgoi
ngt
o
di
e.Ican’
twaitf
ort
hepol
i
cytopayout.
”
Helookedatherasshewal
kedoutt
henbr
ushedof
f
hersent
enceandslept
.

*
**

Laterthatev
ening,KennyandAr onalayonthe
couchcuddlingwhilewat chi
ngar omanticmov i
e.
Kennyy awnedf eel
i
ngsl eepybutshedidn’twantto
getup.Shef oundher sel
fsmili
ngasshet houghtof
thatkisshehadgi venher,shehadbeenki ssed
beforebutnotlikethat.Andthefirmnessinhisvoi
ce
whenKi ngcall
ed…Shepr essedherli
pstogether
blushi
ng.
“
Orobet
si?(
Arey
ousl
eepi
ng?
)”
“
NobutIam sl
eepy
.”
“
Ok,
let
’sgety
out
obed.
”
Hegotupthenpi
ckedherupbr
idal
sty
lewhi
l
eshe
l
aughed.
“
Youneedt
ost
arteat
ingmor
e.Youar
esol
i
ght
.”
“Wouldyoubeli
evemeifIevert
oldIusedtobe
chubbykebalafor
m 1ti
llt
hreebutt
henlostal
lthe
weightf
orm 4and5.”
Helayheront
hebed.“
Wher
edi
dthechubbi
ness
go?
”
“Mygr andmother
’ssicknessst art
ed.Itwasreal
ly
stressful
forme.Iwoul dbeatschool butmymi nd
willbebackathome.Idi dn’teventhinkIwouldpass,
IjustknewIwasgoi ngt ofailevenwhenIwr ote
thoseexams.”
“
Wel
l
,youar
eher
enow.
”
“Yes.I
tsti
l
lfeel
slikeadr eam andsomehowIcan’
t
helpbutworryt
hatImi ghtfai
landall
ofthi
swould
havebeenfornothing.
”
“Youwon’tfai
li
fyouchoosenottof
ail
.Youhaveto
bedeterminedandIswear,f
oury
earsf
rom now,y
ou
aregoingtobegraduat
ing.
”
“
Myonlypray
eri
smygr
andmot
herwoul
dbeal
i
vet
o
wi
tnessi
t.
”
Hesmi ledstari
ngatherforawhi l
ethenkissedher .
Kennyputherhandsonhi sbicepsasheki ssedher
evenhar derpushi
ngherthighasidegetti
ngbet ween
herlegs.Thewayheki ssedshowedherhewasway
experi
encedi nsuch.Heopenedherl egswi der
exposingherpantywhileherdrossrodeupt hen
tookoffhist-shi
rt
.
Arona’
sdickgotwayharderinhispantsashe
l
ookedatherpussyprint
.Thiswasdef i
nit
elynothi
s
planbuthecoul
dn’tst
ophimself.Hecurvedhisback
rubbi
nghisboneronher,hi
slipsnowonherneck
paral
yzi
ngherwhil
eshemoanedsof tl
yinhisear.
Het
ookof
fthedr
esst
hencuppedherbr
east
.
“
Fuck!
”
Heletgot hentookoffherpanti
esstari
ngather
shavedthickpussy.Hetouchedherfeeli
ngher
wetnessthendippedhisheadbet weenherlegsand
sl
idhistonguebetweenherpussyl i
pstasti
ngher.
Hestart
edsucki ngandsuckli
ngherpussywhi l
eshe
moanedmov
ingherwai
stbeneat
hhi
m.
Shesof
tl
ycal
l
edhisnamewatchi
nghi
shead
bet
weenherl
egs.“
Rona…ohGod…”
Hesuckedherev
enhar
derdoi
ngmagi
cwi
thhi
s
t
ongue.
“Ronaaaaa…”Shet hrewherheadbacksqueezi
nghis
headbetweenherl egswhil
eshespasmed.He
stoppedthenpartedherfl
apsandlookedathertiny
wholewonderingjusthowhewasgoi ngtofiti
n,he
wouldhav et
ot earit
.
Hehadseenvari
ouspussieshiswhol
eadultl
i
febut
thi
soneherewasbeauti
fulandwasonlyhi
s.He
tookouthi
sdi
ckthenrubbeditupanddownherwet
sli
t.
Kennyraisedherheadandl ookedathishugedick,
herheartski
ppedaspani ccrepti
n.Hewast oobig,
it
coul
dn’tbenor mal
.Mot husi wasn’
tthatbig,he
wasn’tevenclosethatsize.Aronanoticedthefeari
n
hereyesthenkissedherr ubbinghi
sdi cksli
ppery
pussy.
Shebr
ief
lyf
orgotaboutt
hesi
zemoani
ng.
“
Condom.Idon’
twantachi
l
d.”
Hegotof fherthent ookthecondom whi
leshe
star
edatt hatbigblackdickwavingar
ound.Her
heartpoundedsomuchasshequest i
onedher
choi
ces,wasi ttoolatetobackout?Hegotbackon
topofhert heforcedthecondom onhisvei
neddick.
It
’sgoi
ngt
obeal
i
ttl
epai
nful
ok.Beabi
ggi
rlf
or
me.”
Shenoddedt
henhe#r
emov
ed.
.
.
.
Dir
tyConf
essi
ons
#16
#r
emov
ed

“
Condom.Idon’
twantachi
l
d.”
Hegotof fherthentookt
hecondom whi
leshe
star
edatt hatbi
gblackdi
ckwavingar
ound.Her
heartpoundedsomuchasshequest i
onedher
choi
ces,wasi
ttoolat
etobackout?Hegotbackon
topofhert
heforcedt
hecondom onhi
sveineddi
ck.
“I
t’
sgoi
ngt
obeal
i
ttl
epai
nful
ok.Beabi
ggi
rlf
or
me.”
Shenoddedt henhekissedherpushi nginather
entrancewhi lesheheldherbr eath.Hepushed
harderf orci
ngherpussyt ost r
etchopent henhe
sl
owl ysl i
dinl et
ti
ngherpussyhughi mt i
ght l
y
cl
enchi nghim maki nghimf rownf i
ghtingtheedget o
burryhimsel fdeepinsi
deher .Hel ookedinherey es
whileshesqui rmedwithdiscomf ortbeneathhi m,
herlit
tl
ehear tpoundi
ngthenki ssedherst retchi
ng
hi
swayi n.
Feel
ingasifhewassplit
ti
ngheri ntwohal v
es,she
putherhandonhischestfl
inching.Aronatookboth
handsandpressedthem ont opofherheadwi t
hone
handthenpushedthatdi
ckf urt
herin.Pussywasso
ti
ghtandwarm hefoundhimsel ftot
all
ylosi
ngitas
hepushedevenmor e.
“
Rona…”
Hepausedst
ari
ngatherbeaut
if
ulf
ace.Shewasso
beaut i
fulandhav ingherbeneat hhim withhisdi
ck
i
nsideherhadhi sownhear tracing.Shehadnot race
ofmake- upyetherbeaut ywasst i
l
lsoent r
anci
ng.
Heki ssedherl et
tinggoofherhandst hensqueezed
herbr east.Fuck,allthatper
fecti
onwashi sandhis
onl
y .Niggacoul dev enclimbthemount ai
nand
personallythankGodf orsuchabl essing.
Hegent lyst art
edt hrusti
ngwi thal
mosthalfhisdick
stari
ngather .Kennybr eathedheav i
lyashegently
struckher.Shest art
edmoani ngsoftl
yasthe
di
scomf ortdisappear edwhi l
eherpussygreasedhis
di
ck.Not i
cingherr elaxi
ng,hepushedmor eofthat
bl
ackdi cinsi de.Likeagl ove,herpussywrapped
i
tselfaroundhi m pushinghimt ot
heedge.
“
Shi
t!
”
Kennyfli
nchedmov i
ngback,Aronawentaft
erher
pushingi
talli
nwithoneswiftmove.Kenny
screamedpushinghischest
.Shecouldsweari
twas
i
fherpussywast ear
ingbecauseofstr
etchi
ng
beyondit
slimit
.Tearsfi
ll
edhereyes.
“
Ntsa,
gobot
loko…(
Takei
tout
,it
spai
nful
.)
”
“
Lookatme…”
Shepushedhischestwithbothhands,Ar
ona
grabbedbothandlockedthem ontopofherhead
st
ar i
nginhereyes.
“Thisdickissupposedtogi
veyoupleasur
e,nothi
ng
else.Justpleasur
ebabe…justr
elax,
youaretense.
”
Atearf
elldownf
rom t
hecor
nerofherey
e.“
It
’s
pai
nful
.”
“Iknowandit’
sbecauseyouaretootense.Dick
givesyounot
hingbutpl
easur
eandt hisoneisyours.
You’vegott
olearnhowtohandleit
.It
’sally
ours.”
Hekissedhert
hengentlysli
dital
loutandpushed
backinlet
ti
ngherpussyclenchhi
m.
“
Ahhf
uck!
”
Kennybr eat
hedheavil
ytry
ingtorel
axbutshe
coul
dn’tseem tobeabletohandlethatmonster
.She
wasn’tsureifi
twasmeantt obethispainf
ul,
she
wasn’treall
yavir
gineventhoughshehadonlyhad
sexonceandsev eralmonthsback.Thathadto
countforsexri
ght?
Aronar eachedforapi l
lowt henshov edbeneat hher
buttthenmov edhiswai stseductiv
elypushinginand
out.Hel ookedinherey esf eel
ingsorryforherbut
hersweetpussywoul dn’ tl
ethim giveherabr eak
event houghshebadl yneededi t
.Hemov edhis
waistasi fhewasdanci ngt orumbawhi l
ef i
l
li
ngher
pussywi ththatdickgrunt i
ng.
Slowly,sheadj ustedandstartedmoani ngsoftl
y
whi l
ehecont inuedt ogiveherthegentleslow
strokes.Shelubr i
catedhisdickashei ncreasedhi
s
speed.Sher anherhandsonhi sbi
cepsbegi nni
ngto
enjoyev er
ythr ustgetti
ngmor ewetterast henhe
ki
ssedhersl idingout .Hekneltandputbot hofher
l
egsonhi schest ,hel
dherwai stpushinginagain.
Hebegundr i
l
li
ngintoherwatchinghisdick
stretchi
ngherli
ttl
epussy.Hetappedasweetspot
thatshemoanedl oudergrabbi
ngt hebedding.I
tfel
t
soi nsanel
ygood.Hefuckedherhar dertappi
ngit
mor e,Kennyrol
ledhereyestothebackcur li
ngher
toesasheror gasm wreckedhererupti
ngdeep
i
nsi deher.
“
Awwww…Rona…Ronaaaa…Gomonat
e….Mmama
weh…”
Ronagroanedgoingf
astert
henfrozedeepi
nsi
de
her
,hi
sdickjer
kingfi
l
li
ngupt hecondom.
“
Fuck!
”
Hesli
doutthent
ookof
fthecondom f
rom hi
ssemi
har
ddick.
“Wewi
l
ltestandgety
ouemer
gencypi
l
lst
omor
row
ok?
”
Shenoddedt henhef li
ppedher,Kennyswal l
owed
thenhepressedherchestt obedmaki nghert hrow
herassintheair.Aronastr
okedhi sdickthatwas
hardeni
ngasst aredatherthi
ckpussyt henhesl idi
t
spli
tt
ingherpussylipsandsli
dingt hr
oughherf l
aps
astheyhuggedhi sdick.Heburi
edhi mselfallthe
wayin.
“
Fuckt
hat
’si
t…”
Kennyfrownedraisi
ngherhead,hefeltmoredeeper
thi
sway.Hepr essedherchestdownagai nand
begunpoundingintoherwit
houtanycaret oher
cri
es.I
twasasi fsomethi
nghadgot tenintohi
m and
hejustdi
dn’tcar
eanymorebutf
rom hi
sgr
unt
sshe
couldtel
lhewasenjoy
inghi
mself.
I
tfeltt
otal
lydiff
erentwi t
houtacondom, herpussy
fel
tevenmor esweet er
.Hecur vedhisbackfucki
ng
herdeeperli
steni
ngt ohercr i
est hatseemedtohave
beenturni
nghi m onashepoundedherev enharder
.
Hisball
shitherclitwit
heacht hrust
,Kennypull
ed
thepil
l
owandhuggedi tasifitwouldmakei tall
bett
erwhil
eAr onar avi
shedher .
Thepleasurethatseemedtobeov er
poweringthe
painanddiscomforthadhersqueezi
ngthepill
ow
evenmor emoaning.Ski
nonskin,Aronafuckedher
grunt
ing.
Hesl
idoutandpi ckedherup.Kennywr appedher
l
egsaroundhi
mt henheheldheragainstt hewall
andl
oweredherdownonhi swaiti
ngdickand
hammeredher.Kennyburiedherfaceonhi sneck
moani
ng,thepleasuredoubl
ingasshesl ippedint
o
cl
oud9.
“
Roonaaa…”
“
Takei
tbabe…”
“
Aar
gg!
”
Herbodysti
ff
enedwhilesheconv ul
sedscreaming
asshecamei nt
hemostpl easurabl
ewayev er
.God
thismanknewhisshi
t!Hef uckedherevenharder
diggi
nghi
sdickdeepinsi
dehert hensti
l
ledgivi
ng
heraref
il
l.
Br
eat
hingheav
il
y,heki
ssedherneck.“
Lookatme…”
Kennypul
l
edherfacefr
om hi
sneckandl
ookedat
hi
m sweati
ng.Hesmil
ed.
“
War
engbabe?
”
Sheshy
lysmi
l
ed.
“
Keagor
ataaut
wa?Ar
onawagor
ataKenny
.”
Heki ssedherthenwalkedwithhert othebedand
gentlypull
edouthisdickleav
ingherl eaking.Helay
besideherpul l
i
ngherinhisarmst henclosedhi s
eyesknowi ngonceagainhewasmor ethanj usti
n
l
ov ewi t
hawoman, shehadturnedintot hecenterof
hi
swor l
dev enbef
oreshecameandnowshewas
here,inhisarms.
Hesi
l
ent
lypr
ayedf
orGodt
opr
otecthi
shear
t
becausehewasn’
tsurei
fhewouldhandleanot
her
heart
break,
notwhenhel
ovedherinsanel
ytheway
hedid.
Sl
eepyandexhaust
ed,
sheraisedherheadand
l
ookedathi
shandsomeface.“Rona…”
Hesmi
l
edt
henki
ssedher
.“Ma?
”
Shechuckl
ed.“
Ilov
eyou.
”
Hesmil
edthenkissedtheshesighedclosingher
ey
esfal
li
ngasleep.Ronaswall
owedblinkingaway
hi
stear
ssil
ent
lytakingaleapoffai
th.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#17

…hefuckedherevenhar
derdi
ggi
nghisdickdeep
i
nsi
dehert henst
il
ledgi
vi
ngheraref
il
l.
Br
eat
hingheav
il
y,heki
ssedherneck.“
Lookatme…”
Kennypul
l
edherfacefr
om hi
sneckandl
ookedat
hi
m sweati
ng.Hesmil
ed.
“
War
engbabe?
”
Sheshy
lysmi
l
ed.
“
Keagor
ataaut
wa?Ar
onawagor
ataKenny
.”
Heki ssedherthenwalkedwithhert othebedand
gentlypull
edouthisdickleav
ingherl eaking.Helay
besideherpul l
i
ngherinhisarmst henclosedhi s
eyesknowi ngonceagainhewasmor ethanj usti
n
l
ov ewi t
hawoman, shehadturnedintot hecenterof
hi
swor l
dev enbef
oreshecameandnowshewas
here,inhisarms.
Hesi
l
ent
lypr
ayedf
orGodt
opr
otecthi
shear
t
becausehewasn’
tsurei
fhewouldhandleanot
her
heart
break,
notwhenhel
ovedherinsanel
ytheway
hedid.
Sl
eepyandexhaust
ed,
sheraisedherheadand
l
ookedathi
shandsomeface.“Rona…”
Hesmi
l
edt
henki
ssedher
.“Ma?
”
Shechuckl
ed.“
Ilov
eyou.
”
Hesmil
edthenkissedtheshesighedclosingher
ey
esfal
li
ngasleep.Ronaswall
owedblinkingaway
hi
stear
ssil
ent
lytakingaleapoffai
th.

*
***

Thefollowingmor ning,Kennyhel dthewallasArona

dri
ll
edherf rom behindhol dingwhi l
eshemoaned
exhaustedst andi
ngonhert oes.Hepul l
edherbutt
overfuckingherhar der.Herkneesweakenedasshe
spasmed.Ar onagav eheronel astt
hrustthen
rel
easedi nsi
deher .Hesl idoutt henKennywentt o
thebedandl aydownbr eathingheav i
l
yclosingher
ey
eswhi
l
ecum dr
ipped.
Aronaputonhi spant sthenwal kedoutl eavi
ngher
sleeping.Hepi ckedhisphonef r
om t hecouchand
checkedhi smessages.Hegl ancedatt hebedroom
doort henpickedupKenny ’
sphonewhi chwason
thetableunl ocki
ngitandwentt hroughi t
.Hecopied
King’snumbert ohisphonet henbl ockedand
deletedit.Finall
yheputherphonedownandr eada
messagef rom Atsil
einhi sphone.Hecal l
edhim
backwal kingt othekitchen.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Ijustsawy
ourmessage,
war
eng?
”
“
Ithoughtwewoul
dthr
owMaat
laabachel
orpar
ty.
”
“
Osi
mol
otseaker
eAt
sil
e?(
Youhav
est
art
edAt
sil
e.)
”
Atsi
l
echuckl
ed.“
No,t
hist
imeit’
sdi
ff
erent
.Kanahe
i
sabouttobehavi
ngsexwit
hthesamepersonfor
year
s.”
“
Helov
esMoesi
.Theseki
ndofpar
ti
est
endt
ocause
mor
eharmt
hangood.”
“
Iknowhel
ovesEsi
andnoonei
ssay
inghei
sgoi
ng
t
ocheat
.”
“Ok,don’
tst
artplanni
ngy
et.Iwantt
obet
her
e
planni
ngwit
hy ou.”
“
Cool
.”
“
Didy
ouf
indt
hehouse?
”
“
Yeah,
Isenty
out
hedet
ail
sov
erwhat
sapp.
.”
“
Shar
p.”
Hehunguppressi
nghi
sphonef
orali
tt
lewhi
l
e
bef
orehepr
eparedsomebr
eakf
ast
.

*
**

Atthehospi
tali
nShakawe,Tshenol
o’sf
athersatby
hi
sdaughter
’ssidewhi
lesheslept
.Mmgawe
Tshenol
owalkedinandsighed.
“
Shei
snotawakey
et?
”
“
No.
”
Shenoddedt
henputt
hebagwi
thTshenol
o’s
cl
othesandt
oil
etr
ydown.“
Ibr
oughthersome
cl
othes.
”
“
Ok.
”
“Iknowy out hinkIam abadpersonbutasmuchasI
waswr ong,Iwasj usttr
yingt
oprotectmydaughter.
Shehasbeent hroughenoughtohavemor epeople
talkabouther .Shecan’tevenwalkaroundwit
hout
wear i
ngacap.May beIwentonitthewrongwaybut
Ilovemydaught erj
ustasmuchasy ouloveher.She
i
sal lIgotjustlikeyou.”
“Iam goi
ngtosel
lacoupleofcows, If
oundadoct or
whocanhelpher.Iexpl
ainedtohi
m hersit
uation
andhesaidIshoul
dbr i
ngherforexaminat
ion.Iam
taki
ngherwit
htoGabor oneforacheckup.”
“
Iwi
l
lcomewi
th.
”
Henoddedt
hentur
nedbacktoTshenol
oasshe
madesomesounds.Hequi
ckl
ygotupsmil
ing.
“
Nol
o…”
Tshenol
olookedatherpar
ent
sandsi
ghedr
eal
i
zing
shewasstil
lal
ive.
“
Don’tbescar
ed.Iam notangry.Iam goi
ngtoget
youhel
p.Wear egoi
ngtoseeadoct orinGabor
one
whowill
helpyou.Youaregoingtobef i
ne.
”
MmagweTshenol
ostoodatthebedofthebed
wat
chi
ngasherhusbandcomfor
tedthei
rdaught
er.

(
(Copy
right@2021byFezMat
siki
ti
.+26775447725
Allr
ightsreser ved:Nopar tofthisbookshallbe
repr
oduced, di
stribut
ed,orusedi nanyform orby
anymeans, electroni
c,photocopy i
ng,mechanical
l
y
orotherwise, withoutthepriorwrit
tenpermissi
onof
theauthor.Anyper sonwhodoesunaut hori
zed
worksinr elati
ont othispublicat
ionwil
lbeli
ableto
cri
minal prosecut i
on.)
)

*
**

Mothusiputonhisshoescaref
ull
ynottohurt
hi
mself.Hestoodupabouttogot henSel
etso
openedhereyeswakingup.Sheyawnedsitti
ng
upr
ight
.
“
Youar
eal
readygoi
ng?
”
“
Yeah.Iwi
l
lseey
oul
ater
.”
“
Whydi
dn’
tyouwakemeup?
”
“
Sel
etsoi
twasal
ongni
ght
.”
Shegotupandsmi
l
ed.“
Ok,
Iwi
l
lwal
kyou.
”
“No,
Iam good.Iam l
ateei
therway
.Justst
ayhome
andtakecar
eofy our
sel
f.
”
Shesadlyl
ookedathi
m.“
Iam sor
ryabout
yest
erday.
”
“
It
’sok.Iam sor
ryf
orl
yi
ngt
oo.
”
Shenodded, Mothusi l
eanedov erandki ssedher
thenwal kedout.Seletsogobackont hebedand
scroll
edt hr
oughherphonet il
lshecameacr oss
Kenny ’
snumber .Thought ful
ly
, shetappedi tbutthen
droppedt hecallbeforeitcouldring.Shescr oll
ed
throughherFacebookt hencameacr ossapi ct
ureof
herexget ti
ngmar ri
ed.Shel ookedatt hecomment s
readingthenfinall
yputherphonedownnotwant i
ng
tostressherselfmor e.
Herbabymoved,thesmil
edputti
ngherhandover
herbel
ly
.HerphonerangthenshelookedatLol
o
cal
li
ngwithasi
gh.
“
Hi.
”
“Hey,Iwantedt
oapologize.Youwer
eri
ghtandIam
sorr
y.Ididn’
tev
enreali
zewhatIwasdoing.Iam
sorr
yandIam goingtochange.”
“
Ok.
”
“Arewestil
lgoi
ngf
orshoppi
ngl
i
kewehad
planned?
”
“
No,
Iam t
ir
ed.
”
“LetsoIam reall
ysorry.Ireal
lythoughtIwasj
ust
l
ooki ngoutfortotal
l
yunawar eofhowIwascoming
across.From todayonwar difIhavenothi
ngposi
ti
ve
tosay ,Iwi
ll
notsayi tall
.”
“Iam justtir
edofjusti
fyingmyr el
ati
onshiptoyouor
any oneelse.It
’sstr
essfulknowingIam goingtoa
placewher eev er
yoneisgoingt ori
dicul
emy
relati
onship.Youevenmadet heotherteacherat
school l
ookdownonmyboy fr
iendbecauseofwhat
youareal
way
ssay i
ng.Ir
eal
l
ydon’
tneedsuch
ener
gyinmyli
fe.
”
“I
twon’thappenagain.Ipr
omi se.Fr
om today
onward,i
twon’thappen.Let’
sgof orshopping,
Iwi
l
l
getyouthoseshoesy ouwantkoMr .Pr
ice.
”
“
Iam t
ir
ed.
”
“Andthedr
esst
oo.Iwi
l
lgety
out
heshoesand
dress.
”
Sel
etsosmi
l
ed.“
That
’sal
l
?”
“
Ngng,
Idon’
thav
emoney
.Let
’smeett
her
e.”
“
Ok.I
ntwohour
s.”
“
Shar
p.”

*
**

Kennywokeupt hensighedasherbodyached.I
tfelt
asifshehadbeenlift
ingheavyweight
sthewhole
ni
ght.Shetr
iedt
osi tupri
ghtthenf
rownedather
sor
epussygetti
ngup.Shepi ckedherdressf
rom t
he
fl
oorandsl owlywalkedtothebat hroom, herthighs
hurtsobadt hatshewalkedf unni
ly.Shesatont he
toi
letsitandt r
iedt
opee.Shecl osedherey estightl
y
asthewar m peemadethepai nwor se,tearsfi
lled
herey es.Shepeedslowlythentookabat hgently
washi ngherpussy.Shewalkedbacki nsidether oom
andf oundhim seatedonthebednextt ohi snice
breakfast.
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Hey
…comeandeat
.”
Sheslowlywal
kedoverashenoti
cedhowshewas
walki
ng.Shesatatt
heedgeofthebedwit
honebut
t.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
“
Ican’
tseat
.It
’spai
nful
.It
hinksomet
hingi
swr
ong.
”
“
Obat
lapai
nki
l
ler
?(Youwantapai
nki
l
ler
?)”
“
Ng…”
Hegotupt henshest aredathi sdi
ckinhispant
s
reali
zi
nghehadf uckedherwi t
hthatmonsterdi
ck
theenti
renightt
il
lmor ning.Anysli
ghtmov ements
shemader esult
edini tsli
dinginherpoorpussy
.He
didn’
tevenhavemessyonher .Hegothersome
pai
nki
l
ler
sandhel
pedherdr
ink.
“
Youar
egoi
ngt
obef
ine.Iwi
l
lfeedy
ou.
”
Hepul ledheroverhislapthensheposit
ioned
herselftry
ingnottoinf
lictmorepai
nonher self
.He
fedhert henawhilelat
erhet ookashowerwhi leshe
dressed.Di t
chi
ngthepant i
esfort
heday ,sheputon
herflareddressandpumpsandwal kedtot hesit
ti
ng
room wher eshepickedherphone.Sheopenedher
whatsappmessagest henfrownedatthemessage
from Tshenolo.
Tshenol
o:It
ri
edki
l
li
ngmy
sel
fyest
erday
.
Kennyi
mmedi
atel
ycal
l
edherback.“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
…”
“
Whathappened?
”
“Ahhnnammakenekel apil
ehel
a.(Iwasjustt
ir
ed.
)
Butmay bethatwasabl essi
ngindisgui
sebecause
nowPapai sbringingmet oGaboronetoseea
doctorwhoisgoi ngtohelpme.”
“
That
’sni
ce.
”
“
Yeah,
Iam gl
adIdi
dn’
tdi
ethough.
”Shel
aughed.“
I
sti
l
lwanttogotouniv
ersi
tyandwor
kt i
roy
adi of
fi
ce
keaparamokwanyakwanya.(
andworkanoff
icej
ob
putt
ingonheel
s.)
”
“Iam gl
ady
oudi
dn’
tdi
etoo.Iwoul
dhav
ebeenr
eal
l
y
hurt
.”
“
Howi
sschool
?”
“
Shar
phel
a.”
“
Alr
eadygoty
ourr
oom?
”
“
No.Iam st
ayi
ngwi
thaf
ri
end.
”
“
Whatf
ri
end?
”
“
Youwon’
tknowhi
m.”
Tshenol
opaused.“
War
ehi
m nar
eKenny
?”
“
Hei
saf
ri
end.
”
“
KeeneAr
onawagago?
”
“
Yes.
”
“Omaaka,youtwoar
emor ethanj
ustfr
iends.
Fri
endsdon’
tbl
ushwhentalki
ngtothei
rfri
ends.You
neverbl
ushwhenyoutal
ktome.”
“
Akerewenayouareaf
akef
ri
end.Iwoul
dify
ou
wer
emyr eal
fri
end.
”
“
Mxm,
gat
wengnar
e?Sohowi
she?
”
Kennylower
edhervoi
ce.“
Ican’
tsi
t,ebi
l
enkar
e
ther
eissomethi
ngwrongdownther
e.”
Tshenol
olaughed.“
Whathappened?Tel
lme,
detai
l
s!”
“Heisdi
sabl
edbecausei
tcan’
tbenor
mal
.It
’st
oo
big.
”
“
Howbi
gisi
t?”
“Heel
a,i
t’
sjustbig.Whenheput si
tin,j
ehova!But
i
t’sni
ceaft
erawhi lej
ustthathedoesn’tgett
ir
ed.
Thewholenighthewast urni
ngmear oundnkareI
am somemeatont hebr
aai st
and.
”
Nol
olaughedev
enl
ouder
.“Iwantt
oseehi
m.”
Thebedr
oom dooropenedt
henAr
onawal
kedout
.
“
Nol
owewi
l
ltal
klat
er.
”
“
Okshar
p.”
Shehungupandl
ookedathi
m ashewal
kedov
eri
n
bl
ackj
eansandablackt
-shi
rtt
hatcl
ungt ohi
schest
andbi
cepswhi
lef
ixi
nghiswatchHekissedher.
“
Ret
samae?(
Shoul
dwego?
)”
“
Yes.
”
Het ookherhandpi cki
ngupt hecushi
onont he
coucht henledheroutandopenedt hecardoorf or
her.Heputt hecushiononherseat.Kennysat
putti
ngmostofherwei ghtononebuttwhil
el eaning
againstthatcushi
on.
“
Yougood?
”
Shenodded, heclosedthedoorthenwal kedround
thecartohissidewhi l
eshestared.Hejumpedi n
andstart
edthecart henrever
sedashi sneighbor
waved.Hewav edbackwi t
hasmi lerol
l
ingdownhi s
windowandhadabr i
efchatwit
hherbef orefi
nall
y
dri
vingout.
Hel
ookedatherandl
aughed.
“Whyareyousit
ti
ngliket
hat?Whatwer
eyoudoi
ng
atni
ghtwhil
etherestofusslept
?”
Sher
oll
edherey
esl
ooki
ngawayt
henhel
aughed
ev
enmor
e.
“kooreont
sekaleragol
eleonegape.(Youar
e
sitt
ingononebutt
)Whatwereyoudoingwhil
ewe
slept?”
“Idon’tknowRona, may beIwashav ingsexwit
h
someonewhohasadi sabl
edpenisbecauseit
’sjust
bigandi t
’snotnormal andthatpersonwasjust
ruthl
essanddi dn’
tcarebutr at
herj
ustkeptgoingthe
entir
enightti
llmorning.”
“Heelawarengnare?(Whatar
ey uusayi
ng?)
Dumb
thatpersonojolel
enna(anddateme.)NnaIwon’
t
dot hattoyou,
Iam nott
hatcruel
.”
Shelookedathim andcaughthi
m smil
i
ngather.
Shepressedherli
pstry
ingnottosmil
eback.He
st
oppedt hecarataredtraf
fi
cli
ghtt
henleanedand
overandkissedher.
“
Sor
ryaut
wa?
”
Shenoddedthenhesmil
eddrivingoffwi
thonehand,
hehadshortcl
eannai
l
sandj ustnicehands.Kenny
l
ookedathimthensmil
edlookingoutthroughthe
window.
Aronaconnectedhisphonetotheradioandst
art
ed
play
ingRingo,Sondel
a.Awhilelat
er,hepar
kedat
themall
’sparkingl
otandlookedather.
“
Iwi
l
lgett
hepi
l
ls.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Wantany
thi
ngel
se?
”
“
Ngng,
keshar
p.”
“
Ok.
”
Hewal kedi
nsidethemall
,Kennylookedatthetwo
l
adieshehadwal kedpastastheyturnedt
ohi m
smili
ng.Sheroll
edhereyesthenreachedforher
phone.

*
**

Meanwhil
eLesanglookedatAr
ona’
scarf
rom a
di
stancewit
hherfr
iend.
“
Iwantt
oseewhoher
epl
acedmewi
th.
”
Herfr
iendl
aughed.“
Lesangmmastop.Let’
sget
whatwecameher eforandl
eav
e.Youhurtt
heguy,
heisj
usttr
yingt
omov eon.”
“
Aronai
smyman,
hewi
l
lal
way
sbe.
”
“
Aren’
tyouhappywi
thhi
sboss?
”
“Iam butthatdoesn’
tmeanIdon’tlov
eRona.
HonestlyIloveRonamorejustthatci
rcumst
ances
l
edust owher ewear
etoday.Iwanttoseewhoheis
givi
ngmydi ckto.
”
Theywat chedhim ashewal kedbacktothecart
hen
Lesangwal kedoverinherbodyhuggingbackl
ess
dressandl ongheels.Sheopenedhisdoorand
smiled.
“
Hey
…”
Het ur
nedtoherthenshel
ookedoveratthe
passengerseatandl
ookedatthegi
rlsi
ppingonher
Krusher.
“
Obat
lang?(
Whatdoy
ouwant
?)”
Hisvoi
cewassocold,
Lesangsmil
edasherl
ong
shi
nyweavegotonherface,
shet
uckedi
tbehi
ndher
earexposi
ngherf
lawl
essf
acebeat
.
“
Isthatawaytot
alkt
oal
ongl
ostf
ri
end.Won’
tyou
i
ntr
oduceus.
”
“Babe,thisist
heexwhosl eptwit
hmyboss,theone
Itol
dy ouabout.Lesang,
thisismygi
rl
fr
iend,
theone
Ilove.Pleasest
epback,wewantt ol
eave.
”
“Soyouhaverepl
acedmewi
thachi
l
d?Wonder
s
shal
lneverend.
”
“Wellsheistentimesthewomany oucanneverbe
i
nev erysense.Sheisareal
beauty
.”Heclosedhis
doorandr ever
sedleav
ingherst
andingther
e.Her
fr
iendwalkedov er.
“
Howi
sshe?
”
“Mxm,sheisugly.Ihur
thi
m somucht
hathenow
dat
esuglygir
ls.
”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#18

Lesang’
sfri
endfrowned.“Real
l
y,Isawherf
rom t
he
si
de,shelookedbeauti
ful
.”
Lesangt
urnedt
oherf
ri
end.“Facet
ofaceshei
sugl
y.
Andshelooksl
i
keaschoolki
d.”
“
Real
l
y?”
Theywalkedinsi
det
hemal
l.“
Yes,butIwi
l
lseehi
m
l
ateron.Iam goi
ngt
ogotohishouse.
”
Thef
ri
endl
aughed.“
Aii
wenaLesangmma.
”
“
Iam goi
ngt
oshowhi
mthatnoonecanev
er
r
epl
aceme.”
“
Youwi
l
lbesur
pri
sed.
”
“Youdon’
tknowany
thi
ng.Ar
onal
ovesmesomuch,
heisj
ustwasti
nghi
sti
mewitht
hatgi
rl
.”
“Don’
tbesoconfi
dent
.Thatmanlov
edyousomuch
butyouchoset
ohurthi
mi nst
eadev
enaft
erhegav
e
youhisent
ir
eworl
d.”
“
SeewhynowIdon’ tbeli
evehewouldhav
eal
ready
moveon,i
t’
stooearly.Iam goi
ngt
oseehiml
ateron.
Hewil
lbecryi
ngformeagai n.”

*
**

Kennysi
ppedt
heKr
ushert
henl
ookedathi
m.
“
Howl
ongwer
eyoudat
ingher
?”
Ar
onal
ookedather
.“Twoy
ear
s.”
Kennynoddedsi
l
ent
ly.
“
Youhavenothi
ngt
obewor
ri
edabout
.LesangandI
l
ongended.
”
“
Shei
sbeaut
if
ul.
..
”
Het ouchedherchi
n.“Notmorethanyou.Iam over
thatandIhavemov edon.Iam happywhereIam, I
havenosecondt hought
ssolet’
snottalkaboutthe
past.It
’snotgoi
ngtotakeusanywhere.Agreed?
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Ok.
”
“Weneedtofi
ndyouasuit
ablebi
rt
hcont
rol
met
hod.
Idon’
tli
keusi
ngacondom.”
“
Ok.
”
Aronapar
kedhi
scari
nfr
ontofagat
ethencal
l
eda
number.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Hi
,wespokeear
li
eronabouty
ourser
vant
’s
quar
ter
s.”
“
Ohy
es…”
“
Wear
einf
rontofy
ourgat
e.”
Therewassomesi
l
encethent
heladyspokeagai
n.
“Youaret
heonewi
ththebl
ackcar
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Youcandr
ivei
n.”
Aronahungupt hensteppedoutofthecarand
openedthegat ewhileKennystar
edathissexyback.
Hegotbacki nsidethecarthendrov
ei nandparked
undertheshadeneart heapart
ments.Theyboth
steppedoutoft hecarasaladywalkedfrom t
he
nei
ghbor
’shouseandgoti
nthegat
e.Shesmi
l
ed
wal
kingovert
othem.
“
Hi…mynamei
sMpul
engKhubone.
”
Aronast
ret
chedhishandandbr
ief
lyshookhersas
shesmil
ed.“Ar
ona,t
hisi
smygirl
fr
iend,Kenny
.”
Mpul
engsmi
l
edatKenny.“
HiKenny
.If
igur
eyouar
e
t
heonewhowil
lbest
ayi
nghere.
”
Kennysmiledasshel
ookedatf
ri
endl
ywoman.“
Hi
Mrs.Khubone.
”
Shel aughed.“Ohstopi t
…callmeMpul e.Youboth
cancomeandv iewthehouse.Byt heway ,
my
husbandandIr ecentl
yfini
shedbui l
dingt hese
apar t
ment s,t
herearejusttwohouses, twobedroom
withf i
ttedkit
chenunitsandwar drobes.I t
’sonl
y
P1800, youcanshareifyouwantbutt hel i
miti
stwo
peopl e.Youspli
ttherentthenit
’sP900each. ”She
turnedbackt oKennyandsmi l
ed.“ MyhusbandandI
builtthishousessolemnlyforstudentst hat’
swhy
theyar echeap.“
Kennylookedatthehousewher
eMpulewastaki
ng
them t
o,sheunlockedt
hedoorthent
heywal
kedin
theti
l
edv astroom.Atthecornernearthedoorwas
thesi
nkuni tthatextendedtoform ati
nykit
chen
counter.Attheothercornerwasthesmal l
double
doorfit
tedwar drobethenanotheropendoorwhich
showedt hebat hroom.
“Sothishousewast hef i
rsthousethatwasbui l
t
here,i
t’
soldbutweputsomenewt il
esandwe
paint
editinandout ,weev enputanewcei l
ing.My
husbandandIhadagr eedt hatwewouldrentitout
forP800butt henitdoesn’thavegeyseranda
batht
ub, j
ustshowerandal soyouarenotshari
ng
elect
ri
cit
yunlikethoseatt heapartmentssowe
fi
nall
yagreedt oP750.TheP50f rom P800youwi l
l
keepitforyourownel ect
ricit
y.”
Kennybravelywalkedt
otheti
nybat hr
oom andtook
alook.Shewalkedbackintheroom andopenedt he
wardrobethentur
nedbacktoAr onawhowal ked
overputt
inghishandsonherwai stki
ssi
ngher.
“
Doy
oul
i
kei
t?”
Shesmi
l
edandnodded.“
Yes.
”
“
Youdon’
tmi
ndt
hati
tdoesn’
thav
eagey
ser
?”
“
No,
it’
sfi
ne.Gapei
t’
sbi
g.Thepr
obl
em i
sthatIl
eft
t
hemoneyathome.
”
“
Iwil
lpayt
herentt
heny
ouwi
l
lgi
vei
ttomewhen
wegethome.
”
“
Ok.
”
Aronat
urnedt
oMpul
ewhowasst
andi
ngt
her
e
awkwardl
y.
“
Ok,
seemsshel
i
kesi
t.
”
Mpul
esmi
l
edatKenny
.“That
’sgood.
”
Kennycl
ear
edhert
hroat
.“Whataboutwat
erbi
l
ls?
”
“MyhusbandandIsor tthatout.Youar eresponsibl
e
fort
heyard,Iguessf oryouit’
seasi erbecausethe
backyardi
sy our sandfrontofy ourhouse.Weal so
don’
tall
owpar tieshereoranysor tofnoise.Wear e
notsayi
ngdon’ tplayyourradi
oj ustthatplay
consi
deri
ngot herpeople.Iam notaf anofviol
ence,
wejusthavetobepeacef ulwit
honeanot her.
”
“
Eemma.
”
“
That
’sal
l
.”
Aonat
ookouthi
sphone.“
Whi
chbankdoy
ouuse?
”
“
Stanbi
c.”
Kenny’
sphoner
angthenshewal
kedoutpi
cki
ngt
he
unsav
ednumber.“
Hell
o?”
“
Hey
,it
’sKi
ng.Ar
eyouf
reet
otal
k?”
Kennyl
ookedi
nsi
det
hehousewher
eAr
onawas
tal
ki
ngtoMpul
e.
“Yes.Cany oupleasest
opcall
i
ngme?Ihavea
boyfri
end.Ireal
l
ydon’tappr
eciat
eal
lthi
sandmy
boyfri
enddoesn’tli
keit
.”
“
Ishet
her
e?”
“No.Heisnot.Pl
easestayawayf rom me.Idon’
t
wanttogooutwi t
hy ou,Iam happyi
nmy
rel
ati
onshi
p.Thisshouldbethelastti
mey oucal
lme.
Bye.”
ShehungupasAr
onawal
kedoutput
ti
nghi
sphone
i
nhispocket
.
“
Whower
eyout
alki
ngt
o?”
Shel
ookedathi
mthensi
ghed.“
ItwasKi
ng.It
old
hi
m nott
ocal
lme.
”
“
Hei
scal
l
ingwi
thanot
hernumberagai
n?”
“
Yes.
”
Heki
ssedher
.“Iwi
l
lsor
titout
.”
“
Itol
dhi
m nott
ocal
lagai
n.”
“Iam goi
ngt
omakesurehedoesn’
tev
ent
hink
aboutit
.Hei
sgoi
ngfarnow.
”
Mpulewal
kedoutl
ocki
ngthedoorandthebur
glar
bart
hensmil
edhandi
ngKennythekeys.
“Wellseey
ouwheny oumovei
n.Istaynextdoor
ther
e.Yourboyfr
iendwil
lgi
veyoumynumbersoy ou
cancommuni cat
ewi t
hmeifneededbe.”
“
Ok.
”
“Rentshoul
dbepai
dwi
thi
nthef
ir
st10day
soft
he
newmont h.
”
“
Thanky
ouMpul
e.”
“
Youar
ewel
come.
”
Kennywal
kedbackt
othecarwi
thAr
onat
hengot
si
tt
ingcaref
ull
y.Ar
onast
art
edt
hecart
henr
ever
sed
anddroveoff
.
“
Yougood?
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Yes.
”
“
Shoul
dwegetbr
eakf
astf
ir
storgett
est
ed?
”
“
Let
’sgett
est
edf
ir
st.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hedr
ovet
oacl
i
nic.

*
**

Kefi
lwecri
edinhermot herin-l
aw’sarmsasaf ew
rel
ati
veswatched,t
heirheartsbleedi
ngforher
.She
cri
edevenloudershaking.
“
Takehear
tKef
i.I
twi
l
lbeal
ri
ght
.”
“
Whatam Isupposedt
odonow?
”
“
Weareher
ereadyt
osuppor
tyou.Wear
eyour
f
ami
l
y.”
Hersi
steri
n-l
awwal
kedi
nsi
det
hehouseandl
ooked
atKef
i.
“
Shei
sfaki
ngi
t!Sheki
l
ledmybr
other
!’
Hermotherl
ookedather
.“Mal
ebogo,
it’
senough!
Canyoustopit
?”
“
Sheki
l
ledmybr
other
.Shei
sfaki
ngi
t.
”
“Nooneki
l
ledyourbrot
her
,hedi
edbecausei
twas
God’
sti
me.Stopit
!”
“Sheisamoneyloverthisonemama,sheprobabl
y
kil
ledhi
mforhispoli
cies.Shegavehi
mthesame
poisonhehadgoingkill
hermotherwi
ththenshei
s
theoneacci
dental
lydrankit.
”
Everyonei
nthehousel
ookedatMal
ebogosi
l
ent
ly,
i
ncludingKef
il
we.
“
Whowant
edtoki
ll
mymot
her
?Yourbr
otherwant
ed
t
oki
l
lmymother
?”
Mal
ebogocl
osedhermout
hreal
i
zinghersl
i
pof
t
ongue.
“
Imean-
“
Kef
il
westoodup.“
Yourbr
otherwant
edt
oki
l
lmy
mother
?”
“
Heywenadon’
tactsur
pri
sed.
”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evey
ouwant
edt
ohur
tmyf
ami
l
y.”
Kef
iwalkedoutcr
ying.Malebogo’
smot
herl
ookedat
her
.“Iam t
oooldforthi
s!”
Mal
ebogowal
kedoutgoi
ngaf
terKef
i.
“
Iknowy
ouki
l
ledhi
myousnake.
”
Kefipausedcryi
ngthensmiled.“
So?Youcan’ tprov
e
i
t.Igavehim hi
sownpoi son.Becarefulofwhatyou
mightdrinkher
e,youmightfindyoursel
fdead.”
“Soyoudi
ditforhi
sinsur
ancemoney
?Real
l
y?You
aregoi
ngtohell
.”
Kefifol
dedherar ms.“Youbettertakey ourbrot
her’s
kidsbecauseIam takingmydaught erwithtogether
withthathundredthousandthatisgoi ngtopayout .
Andy ouknowwhat ’
stheniceparttoi t,
yourbrother
mar r
iedmeoutofcommuni t
yofpr opertyakere
becausey outoldhi
m Iwasagol ddigger,Iam
taki
ngt hatmoneyandi t
’smineal one.”
“
Omol
oi!
”
Kefichuckl
ed.“Wear eal
lwi
tches,
justthatwe
practi
cediff
erentki
ndofwit
chcraf
t.Mineissmar
t
witchcr
aft.
”
“
Iheardy
ourf
irstbornisarapeproduct,
nowIsee
whyyouwoul
dgetr apped.Youdeservetoberapped.
Heshoul
dhavekil
ledyouaf t
err
appingyou.”
Someaunt swalkedoutthenKef
ist
art
edcry
ing.
Malebogolookedathershaki
ngherheadwi
th
di
sbeli
ef.

*
**

Mothusi
sippedhi
sbeeratThabang’
shousewho
wasstar
ingathi
mi nshock.
“
Soshebur
nty
ou?
”
“
Yeah.
”
“Ican’tbel
ievethi
s.It
’sal
way
sthesweetonest
hat
dot heunthinkabl
e.”
“
Ithi
nki
t’
sherhor
mones.Let
sowasnev
erl
i
ket
hat
.”
“Nowsheis.Andy
oucan’
ttel
lmey
oubel
i
evei
t’
sthe
hormones.
”
“Nooneunderstandsher ,
shehasbeenhur talot
andIguessital
l play
sapar t.Sheeverydaydefends
ourr
elat
ionshi
pf rom herfri
endsandf amil
y.The
l
eastIcandoislov eherright.Shehasbeennot hi
ng
butagoodwomant omeal lthi
swhile.
”
Thabangshookhi
shead.“
Shei
sabusi
ve.
”
“
Ithappenedonce.Andmendon’tgetabused.She
r
egretsheracti
ons.Ij
ustwi
sht
hatwhitemancanal l
me,Ireal
lyneedagoodjob.
”
“
Mengetabusedt
oo,
theysuf
feratt
hehandsof
woman.
”
“NnaIdon’
tbeli
evethat
.Let
socannev
erabuseme.
Sheactedoutofanger,
somethi
ngwomendo.”
“
Wow!
”
“
It
’snor
mal
.”
Thabangdr
ankhi
sbeershaki
nghi
shead.
*
**

Atthecli
nic,
AronaandKennysatnexttoeachot
her
st
aringatthenursewhowassti
llcounsel
i
ngthem.
“
Ok,
soKenny
,whatwi
l
lyoudoi
fyouhav
eHI
V?”
“
Idon’
t.
”
Thenur
sesmi
l
ed.“
Ok,
whati
fhehas?
”
“
Iwi
l
ljustaccepthi
m.”
“
Andy
ouAr
ona,
whatwi
l
lyoui
fyouhav
eHI
V?”
Arona’sheartpoundedashethoughtofhissex
chain,hewassleepingwi
thLesangwhenshewas
sleepingwit
hDanielwhobeforehadsleptwit
h
variouswomen.
“
Iwil
ll
earnhowtoli
vewi t
hitandifKennyhasHIV,
it
won’
tchangehowIfeelabouther
.Iloveherso
muchIcanli
vewit
hit.
”
“Aker
ey ourememberwhatIsai
d?Onel
ineis
negat
ive,t
woi sposi
ti
ve.Youmayt
akeofft
heli
ds.
”
Kennytookof
fher
sthenl
ookedatt
heonel
i
newi
th
asmile.
“
Kenny
,howmanyl
i
nes?
”
“
One.
”
Thenur
sesmi
l
ed.“
Ok,
Arona?
”
Arona’
shear
tpoundedashelookedathi
s,Kenny
st
oppedsmil
ingt
henleanedoverl
ooki
ng.
“
Arona,
whatdoesi
tsay
?”
Hel
ookedatt
henur
seandswal
l
owed.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#19

“
Howaccur
atear
ethese?
”
Thenur
sesmi
l
ed.“
Theyar
ever
yaccur
ate.
”
Kennyl
eanedbackandsmi
l
ed.“
Hehasonel
i
ne.
”
“Wel
ltheny
oubothar
enegat
ivebutyoushoul
d
comebackagai
naft
erthr
eemonthsandtestagai
n.”

*
**

Minutesl
atert
heywalkedoutwhil
eAronaheldthei
r
cards.Theywalkedpastamanwhosmi ledstar
ing
athowKennywaswal kingt
henlaughedstar
ingat
Arona.
“Otl
agobat
sangwanaMi
ster
!(Youwi
l
lhur
tthe
chi
l
dMister
!)
”
Ar
onal
aughed.“
Otl
afol
a.(
Shewi
l
lheal
.)
”
“
Osekawat
lol
aodi
ray
aloMi
ster
!(Don’
tev
erdo
t
hat
.)
”
Aronalaughedshaki
nghi
sheadt
henopenedt
he
doorforKenny.
“Ibetev
eryonecantel
lwhatIwasdoi
ngl
astni
ght
.
Canwej ustgobackhome?”
Aronasmil
edt
henki
ssedher
.“Ok.Ar
en’
tyou
hungry
?”
“
No,
Iam st
il
lful
l
.”
Shegoti
nthecarthenheclosedherdoorand
j
umpedonthedriv
er’sseat
.Hestart
edthecarthen
drov
eoff
.
“
Whywer
eyousoscar
edi
nsi
det
her
e?”
“BecauseIwassl
eepingwithLesangwhil
eshewas
cheati
ngonme.Inevertestedaft
erthat
.Ithi
nkIjust
star
tedpani
cki
ngasIt houghtofi
tbecausehonestl
y
ther
ecouldhavebeenachance.”
“
Ok…”
Helookedatherasshel
eanedbackonherseat,
her
ey
esclosedthenhesmil
eddri
vi
ng.Ifhehadeverhi
t
ajackpot,t
hiswasit.Thatremindedhim, hewas
goingtohaveamant omant alkwithKing.Hehad
thoughthewouldletitgobutitdidn’
tseem King
wasr eadytost
opwi thhiscal
ls,heneededa
personalwarni
ngandhewasgoi ngt ogiveitt
ohim.
Hedr ov
ei nhisy ar
dt henparkedthecarandlooked
atKennywhowasst ill
sleepi
ng.Hesteppedoutof
thecarthenunl ockedt hedoorbefor
egoingbackfor
herandpickingherup.Kennyopenedherey esashe
carr
iedherinsidet hehouseandputheront he
couch.
“
Ihav
etogoandmeetupwithAtsi
le.Iwi
ll
beback
i
nawhil
e.I
fyouneedany
thi
ngcall
me. ”
Shenodded.“
Ok.
”
“
Whoboughty
ouy
ourphone?
”
“
Oh…myex.
”
Henoddedt
henki
ssedher
.“Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
“
Comeandl
ockup,
ther
ear
ethi
evesher
e.”
“
Ok.
”
Hewal kedoutt henshel ockedthedoorand
switchedont heTV.Si tt
ingdown, Kennyf r
ownedat
thepai nbetweenherl egsandgotup.Shewal kedto
hisbedr oom andt hent ookouthermi rrorf r
om her
bag.Shet ookof fherdressthenlayont hebedand
staredatherpussyf rom themirror,unsur eofwhat
shewasseei ng, sheclosedherlegsandputt he
dressbackonv owingt ogotothehospi tali
fthepai
n
didn’tstopafteraf ewday s.
Shewentbackt othesi
tt
ingroom whereshelaidon
thecouchwatchingTV.Minutesl
atershereached
forherr
ingi
ngphone.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Hey,i
t’
sNamet so,nehmmawher eyouser
ious
aboutfi
ndingar oom toshare?Ireal
l
yneed
accommodat ion.Ididn’
tgetanyt
hingkocampus,I
am sostressedr i
ghtnowebilekanaall
owancegay
a
tsena.
.”
Kennybutherlowerl
ipasgui
ltst
ruckher.“
Yesbut
nowIcan’tbecauseIf
oundsomethingIcanaff
ord
al
one.”
“
Eish…”
“Butinthesamey ar
dthereisanemptytwo
bedroom apart
ment,it
’sP1800andyoucanshar
e,
P900each, youj
usthavetofindsomeonet
oshare
with.“
“Yah…letmesear
chforsomeone.P900i
snott
oo
badfornowIguess.
”
“
Yeah.
”
“
Ok,
thanks.
”
“
Shar
p.”
Kennyputherphonedownthent
hought
ful
l
ytookit
againt
hendelet
edMothusi
’
scontact
sandrel
axed
watchi
ngTV.
Shefr
ownedatt heknockonthedoort
hengotup
andcheckedthr
oughthewindow.Shemovedback
andopenedthedoorforCandywhowassmili
ng.
“
HiKenny
…”
“
Uhhi
…”
“
Icameher
eformycasser
ole.I
t’
sact
ual
l
ynotmi
ne
butmymot
her
’sandshewant
sitback.
”
“
Ok,
Iwi
l
lgeti
tfory
ou.
”
“
Thanks.
”
Kennywalkedtot
heki
tchenandcamebackwi
thher
cl
eancasserol
e.
“
Ther
e.”
“Thankyousomuch, i
fitwasj ustAr
onaIwouldbe
gett
ingi
tdir
tyandempt ythenf r
om t
hereIwould
havetosoakitbef
orewashi ngit.
”
Theybot
hlaughedasKennyhandedi
ttoher
.
“
Youar
ewel
come.
”
Candylookedathert henl aughed.“Iam so
embarrassedrightnow, Iam sorryabouttheother
day.Tobehonest ,RonaandIar ejustfr
iendsbuti
n
myownheadobv iouslyIthoughtwewer egetti
ng
somewher ekantedol olo.Talkaboutbei ngina
rel
ati
onshipalone.ButnowIam gl adIknowsoI
stopapplyi
ngmy selfunnecessar i
ly.”
“
It
’sok.Heexpl
ainedt
ome.
”
“
Soy
ouandhi
m ar
eof
fi
cial
l
ydat
ingr
ightnow?
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Yes.
”
“
Hei
sagoodguy
.”
“
Hei
s.”
“Youknowwhat…toapol
ogiz
eformycri
ngeful
behavi
or,
Iam goi
ngtodoyournai
l
s.Iam goodat
that
.”
Kennysmi
l
edpol
i
tel
y.“
Ok.
”
“
Let
’sexchangenumber
s.”
Kennyhesit
ati
nglygav
eherthenumbert
henshe
walkedbackinsi
dethehousel
ocki
ngbehi
ndher
.

*
**

Tshenol
o’smot
hergaveherf
oodbackathome
whil
eshesatonherbed.
“Iam sorrythaty
oufeltl
i
keyouhadnochoi
cebutt
o
kil
lyourself
.Ihavebeenwor
ri
edabouty
ou,Iknowi
t
mightlookli
keIwasn’
tbutIwor ryaboutyouso
muchbecauseIdon’twanty outodie.Youaret
he
onlychil
dGodgav emeandIj ustwantedtodo
everyt
hinginpowert
oprotectyouf r
om the
communi ty
.“
Tshenolosmiled.“
Ihav
etor
ecor
dthi
s,y
ouar
e
apol
ogizing?
”
Hermot
herl
aughedst
andi
ng.“
Waswaba.
”
“
Youshouldapol
ogi
zeagai
n,nnaIwasn’
tfeel
i
ng
t
hatapol
ogy.
”
Hermothershookherheadwalki
ngoutasTshenol
o
l
aughed.Shepickedherr
ingi
ngphonewit
hasmi l
e.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
…howar
eyouf
eel
i
ngnow?
”
“
Ifeel
bet
ter
.Idr
ankt
hepai
nki
l
ler
s.”
“Ok.Iam sorr
ythatIam cal
l
ingever
yfi
veminutes
butIam justt
ryi
ngtomakesur ey
oudon’tt
rytokil
l
yoursel
f.
”
Nolosmil
ed.“
Iam f
ineTebat
so.GapeIwon’
tdoi
t
agai
n.”
“
Good.Ihav
etogo.Iam dr
ivi
ng.
”
“
Ok,
shar
p.”
“
Iwi
l
lcal
lyoul
ater
.”
“
Ok.
”
Hehungupl
eav
ingwi
thasmi
l
eonherf
ace.

*
**

Ar
onadr
ov einsi
dehisyoungbrother’
shouset
hen
wal
kedi
nsidethehousebumpi ngshoulder
swi
th
hi
m.Helookedathisfr
iendthenlaughed.
“
Whatt
hef
uckar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”
Lebi
tsobumpedfistwi
thAr
onal
aughi
ng.“
Igot
tr
ansfer
redback.
”
“Mmebanebagot
lwael
amasepabagoi
sa
kgakal
a.”
“
Yahbuttheproj
ecti
sdoneandIam backhome.At
l
eastIcannowfocusonPeoandherpregnancy
.She
wascompl
aini
ngev
ery
day
.”
At
sil
ehandedRonabeert
henheopenedi
tanddr
ank.
Atsi
le’
sphonev i
bratedfrom hi
spocketthenhet ook
i
toutandsi ghedreadingthemessage.“Maatlaareo
etl
aleene,(Maatl
asay sheisalsocoming,)we
shouldplanthi
srealquickbeforehear
rives.Heis
bri
ngingmeatanddr inks.
”
“
Ican’
tst
ay,
Ihav
etogobackhome.
”
“
Iam sur
eKennycoul
dusesomebr
eakf
rom y
ou.
”
AronalookedatAtsil
ewhost eppedbackl
aughi
ng.
Confused,Lebi
tsolookedatArona.
“
Who’
sKenny
?”
“Hisnewgi
rlf
ri
end.Letmecall
someone.
.”Atsi
l
e
excusedhi
mselfdi
alinganumbert
henLebi
tso
l
ookedathisbestfr
iend.
“
Youhav
eanewgi
rl
fr
iend?
”
“
Yeah.
”
“
CanIseeher
?”
Ar
onat
ookouthi
sphonet
henhandedi
ttoLebi
tso
whol
ookedatt
hebeaut
if
ulgi
rlonhi
sscr
eensav
er.
“
Ilov
eher
,shei
sper
fect
.”
Lebi
tsogav ebackt hephoneandsi ghed.“Ihopeit’
s
notoneoft hosegamesy ouplaywithLesangt hen
someoneget shur tunnecessari
ly
.Youknowy ou
l
oveLesangandev eryt
imey outwobrokeup,
someonehadt ogethur tbecauseyoukeptgoing
back.I
t’
snott hef i
rstti
meLesangcheat s.Andi t
’s
notthefi
rsttimey oubreakup.Thisgirll
ooks
i
nnocentandy oung,Ihopeshedoesn’tgethur t.
”
Ar onashookhi shead.“Nott hi
st imear ound.With
Kennyi t’
sdifferent.Icanfeel i
t,Ilovehermor ethan
Ihav eeverlov edany one.Asst r
angeandcr azyas
thismaysound, myhear tstart
spoundi ngev eryti
me
Isetmyey esonher .Ican’tbeli
ev eshei smine.She
doesn’thav etot ryhard,shedoesn’ thav etodo
any thi
ng.Ilovet hi
sonemor e.If eell
ikesheisa
freshstartthatGodgav eme.Shei stheone.”
Lebit
solookedathisf
ri
endtal
kaboutKennysmi
l
ing
thenhelaughed.“
Ok…Iam sol
d.Ican’
twaitt
omeet
herfacetoface.
”
At
sil
ewal
kedbacki
nthenRonal
ookedathi
m.
“
Ther
ewon’
tbeanyst
ri
pper
s.”
“Thenwhat’
sthepoi
ntoft
hebachel
or’
spar
tyi
fther
e
arenostr
ipper
s?”
“Nostr
ipper
s,It
hinkweshouldj
ustt
hrowthem both
thepar
tyandinvi
tefr
iendsandf
amil
y.WenaAtsil
eI
don’
ttr
ustyou.”
“
What
?ComeonRona,
thi
sissupposedt
obehi
s-“
“Wearet hr
owingthem boththepart
y.That’
sit,
maybelikeapool part
yofsomethingofthatsort
.
Wewi l
lbookav enueorsomet hi
ng.I
nvit
efriends
andfamily,t
henhav ethepar
ty.
”
Atsil
elookedatLebi tsohoppingforbackup.Lebi tso
shrugged.“Ronai sri
ght.Let’
sjustthrowsomet hing
forbothoft hem becausegoneabachel or’
spar ty
i
sn’tapar t
ywi t
houtthest r
ippersandwecan’ thav e
stri
ppers.Wedon’ twanttor epeatthesamet hi ng
thathappenedonmybachel or’
spar t
y,Ialmostdi dn’
t
getmar ri
ed.IfMoesi wil
lhaveabr i
dal shower, i
twill
besomet hingsoi nnocent,nostri
ppersjustthe
l
adiesgi v
ingeachot hergif
tsandt akingpict
ur es
unl
ikeabachel
or’
spart
ysol et’
sjustpl
ayi
tsaf
e.
Gapennagakebat l
egoikgolega.”
Ronaf
ini
shedhisbeer.“
Thenit’
sall
set.Tal
kto
Moesi
’
sf r
iendsandputthem i
ntheloop.Wewill
makecontri
buti
onsf
rom ther
eafter
.Ihavetogo.
Wewil
ltal
k.”
Ronabumpedshoul
der
swi
thLebi
tso.“
Wewi
l
ltal
k.”
“
Sur
elai
taka.
”
Aronawalkedoutt
hengoti
nhi
scaranddr
oveout
call
i
ngKing’snumber
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Youkeepcall
i
ngmygir
lf
ri
endev
enaft
erIwar
ned
you,It
hinkweshoul
dmeetandt
alkmantoman
kanayang?”
“
Ok,comet omyhousewewi
l
ltal
k.Letmesendy
ou
t
headdress.”
“
Sur
e.”
Ki
nghungupt
hensentt
headdr
ess.
*
**

AtKing’shouse,Ar onapar kedhiscarthenstepped

outasKi ngwalkedoutoft hehousewear i
nghis
unif
orm.Realizi
nghewasasol dier
,Ar
onashookhi s
headnotev ensur prised.Theseguy st
houghtthey
ownedt hecountry .Kingconfidentl
ywalkedover.A
bitt
all
erandbuf fert hanKing,Aronastaredathim
thenKingshrunkhi seyesannoy ed.
“
Makei
tqui
ck.Ihav
edut
iest
oat
tendt
o.”
“
Icameher
etowar
nyou,
otsamael
agont
ena.
”
“I
sshemar r
iedtoyou?Iam goi
ngtotakeherf
rom
you,
allyouhavetodoiswatchandyouwon’tdo
anyt
hingtome.”
AronachuckledthenpunchedKingcat chi
nghim
completel
yhi m.Hestaggeredbackbending.Arona
ki
ckedhi m betweenhi
slegssohar dthatKingfell
grunt
ing.Wi t
hhisshoe,Aronasteppedonhi sneck
hard.
“
Idon’
tgi
veaf
uckaboutwhoy
ouar
eorwhatt
hey
tr
ainyoutodobutot l
any ela.Gochaseaft
er
people’
swomen, notmine.Youarenottheonlyone
whocanki l
l.Ial
soownagunandIwi ll
kil
lyouand
nevergetcaught.Letl
wael abathomasepa.O
marete!
”
Ar
onagoti
nhi
scaranddr
iveof
fcal
l
inghi
sol
der
br
other
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Ijustpunchedy
ourcol
l
eague.
”
“
Mycol
l
eague.
”
“Asoldi
er.Hewouldn’tst
opcal
li
ngandharassi
ng
enemyandheev enhadthegut
st otel
lmehewas
goingtotakeherfrom meandthatIwon’
tdo
anythi
ngtohim.”
“
EishAr
ona!
”
“
Howmucht
roubl
eam Ii
n?”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#20

Lat erthatday,Mothusigoti
nsi
dethehouseand
foundSel et
soseatedont hebedfoldi
nghi
sclothes
nicely.Sheturnedt
ohi m andsmil
edashenoticed
hernewhai r
styl
e.
“
Hey
…howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?Yourf
oodi
sready
.”
“
Iam good.Youl
ookni
ce.
”
Hesatdownthenshesmi
l
ed.“
Thanks.Iboughty
ou
somet
hingt
oday.”
Mot
husi
lookedathercur
iousl
y.“
What
?”
Shegotupthengotthesmallboxandgav
eitt
ohi
m.
“Isawi
tandthoughtofyou.
”
Mot
husismil
edandgotthebox.Heopenedi
tand
t
ookoutthewat
chsmil
ing.
“
Wow!
”
Shesatdown.“
Youdon’thav
eone,
youneeda
watch,
youcan’
tkeepchecki
ngt
imeonyourphone.
”
Heputi
tont
henl
ookedati
thappi
l
y.“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Howwaswor
k?”
Helookedather.“
Iwor
kedhalfday.Iwasinpai
nso
IwenttoThabang’
shouse.Youcancallhi
mto
conf
ir
m. ”
Sheshookherhead.“
Ibel
i
evey
ou.Di
dyoudr
ink
yourpi
l
ls?
”
“
Yes.
.”
Selet
sogotupthenwarmedhisfood.Shetooka
dishandgavei
ttohim.Mothusiwashedhishands
thenshegavehi
m acleandi
shtoweltodryhi
swet
handsbefor
efi
nall
ygivi
nghim hi
sfood.
Shetookthedisht
owel
ashel
ookedathi
sfood
sal
iv
ating.“
Thanks.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
Hest ar
tedeati
ngt henhisphonerangfr
om hi
s
pocket.Sel
etsolookedathim br
iefl
yandcont
inued
fol
dingclot
heswhi leansweredthecal
l.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hi,
it’
sMar
k,wemetataf
il
li
ngst
ati
on.
”
Mothusi
’shear
tski
pped.“
Ohy
es,
Iremember
,how
ar
ey ouSir
?”
“Iam good,
solist
en,somethingcameup.Ineeda
driv
er.Oneofmydr i
verspassedon,hewasshotand
Ineedsomeonet orepl
acehim.Yousaidyoucan
driv
eabi gt
ruckri
ght?”
“Yessi
r.Ihav
eanECdr
iver
’sl
i
cense.Al
soaCl
ass
B.”
“
Good,wel
lyousai
dyouneededajob,
Iam gi
vi
ngi
t
t
oyou.Doyouhaveapasspor
t?”
“
Yessi
r!
”
“
Ok,Iwil
lhav
emyassist
antsendyoudetai
l
sof
wher
eIneedy out
omorr
ow.Youaredri
vi
ngt o
Namibi
asoyouneedtosignafewdocuments.”
“
Yessi
r,Iwi
l
lcome.Thanky
ouv
erymuchsi
r.
”
“
Seey
out
omor
row.What
’sy
ournameagai
n?”
“
Mot
husi
Sir
.”
“
OkMot
usi
,tomor
row.
”
“
Yessi
r!Thanky
ouv
erymuch.Iwon’
tdi
sappoi
nt
y
ou.
”
MarkhungupasSel
etsol
ookedathi
m.“
What
’s
goi
ngon?”
Mothusil
ookedathershaki
ng.“
Babei
twast
hat
man…t hewhit
eman.Igotajobasatr
uckdr
iver
!”
Sel
etsoputherhandsonhermout
h.“
Youdi
d?”
“
Yes.
”
Shehuggedhim caref
ulnottohur
thi
sback.
Mothusihel
dhertight
lyst
il
lshaki
ngwit
hshock.She
st
eppedback.
“
Iam sohappy
.”
“
HesaidIshouldcomet omor
rowmorni
ngtosign
mycontr
act.Ial
readyhaveat
ript
oNamibi
a.”
Atearr
oll
eddownSelet
so’
scheek.“
Iam happyf
or
you.Weshoul
dpray
.Let’
skneel
.”
Theybot
hkneltont
hefl
oorhol
dinghands.Sel
etso
cl
osedherey
esandstar
tedtopr
ay.
“
Dearl
ord,
wewantt
othanky
ouf
ort
hisdayt
haty
ou
hav egi venus, wewantt othanky ouf ornev ery our
endingl ov e,todaywekneel bef or ey out opr aisey our
namet ot hemosthi ghfory ouhav eanswer edour
prayer s.Wewantt ot hanky ouf oropeni ngt hedoor s
thathadbeencl osed.Wewantt ot hanky ouf ort hi
s
breakt hroughandf atherwewantt ot hanky ouf or
every thi
ngwehav e.MayMot husi dowonder sand
i
mpr esst hewhi teman.Ashedr i
v est het rucks,
fathermayy ougui dehi m andpr otecthi m.Icov er
him wi tht hebl oodofJesus.Ispeaknot hi
ngbut
prosper ityi nhislife,nothingbuthappi nessand
success.Idecl arehi m awi nnerbef orey ouf orhei s
meantt obeone.Hel phim bet hemany ouwanthi m
tobe, helphi ml eadt hi
sfami lyi nt her ightful
dir
ect ion.Hel pmebeabet terpar tnert ohi m.Hel p
mebeabet terwoman.Iam notper f
ectbutgui de
mei nt ot her ightf
ul pathLor d.Hel pmeacceptl ov e
whengi v ent ome.Wear ebot hsi nner sbutwear e
sti
lly ourchi ldrenandwewi l
l forev ercomet oy ou
becausewehav enoonebuty ou.Ial sopr ayf orour
unbor nchi ldseekingy ourpr otect ion.Idon’ tknow
myenemi esf atherf orIcan’tseet hem wi thmy
humaney esbuty oucan, pr
ot ectmyf ami l
yf rom
thosewhomaywantt oharm us.Fatherifthi
sunion
i
smeantt obe,letitbeLord.”Shepausedast ears
cascadeddownhercheeks.“ I
fit
’snott henhelpus
dealwitht
hatfactandmov eforwardinl i
febutsti
ll
betheparent
sourchi l
dneeds.Iam tiredoffight
ing
soIleavei
talluntoy ou.I
nthemi ghtynameof
Jesus,amen.
”
Mot
husi
lookedather
.“Amen.
”
Sheopenedherey
est
henwi
pedawayhert
ear
s.“
I
am happyf
oryou.
”
“
Notf
orme,
forus.
”
Theygotupthenshecont i
nuedfol
dingclotheswhil
e
hewatchedhersi
lent
ly.Hehadnev erhadany one
prayf
orhimli
kethat,matteroff
act,hehadnev er
hadanyoneprayf
orhi mingeneral
.Sheraisedher
headandcaughthim star
ing.
“
What
?”
Heshookhi
shead.“
Not
hing.
”
“
Iwi
l
lpackyourbagfort
hetri
p.Di
dtheyhowl
ong
y
ouwil
lbei
nNami bi
afor?”
“
Hesai
dhi
sassi
stantwi
l
ltel
lmet
hedet
ail
s.”
“
Ok.Iwi
l
lputasi
desomecl
othes.
”
Henoddedt
hencont
inuedeat
ing.

*
**

Kennysati
nlukewarm waterinthebathtubsoaki
ng
hervagi
nawhileeati
ngSimbachi psli
steningtot
he
rai
noutsi
de.Sheslowlychewedasherphonebegun
tori
ngthenshereachedforitfr
om thef l
oor.
“
Mmama…”
“
Didy
ouhear
?Yourmot
herhaski
l
ledherhusband.
”
“
Ma?
”
“
Herhusbandi
sdead.
”
“
Whati
sshegoi
ngt
odonow?
”
“Hersi
steri
n-l
awcall
edsay
ingsheki
l
ledhi
mfor
gatwedipol
icy.Shei
sgoi
ngtogetmoney.
”
“
Wow…”
“Thereisaspecialpl
aceforherinhell
.Ist
il
lcan’
t
beli
eveGodgav emesuchachi l
dbutmay beitwasa
blessi
ngindisguisebecauseIgotyou.”
Kennysmil
ed.“
Ireal
l
ymi
ssy
ou.Ar
etheyst
il
l
tr
eati
ngyouwell
?”
“Kenny
,Iam f
ine.Notev
ery
onewi
l
labuseme.Iam
happy.
”
“
Ifany
thi
ngchanges,
tel
lmeok?
”
“
Iwi
l
l.Soy
ouar
est
il
lst
ayi
ngwi
tht
hatboy
?”
Shecl
ear
edhert
hroat
.“If
oundahouseandIam
goi
ngtomoveoutassoonaspossi
ble.
”
“
Ify
ouar
enotcar
eful
youwi
l
lgetpr
egnant
.”
“
Iam nothav
ingsex.
”
“Whosaidy
ouarehavi
ngsex?Isai
dify
ouar
enot
car
eful
youwil
lgetpr
egnant
.”
Kennypr
essedherl
i
pst
oget
herembar
rassed.
“
Hei
sagoodman.
”
“
Icouldtel
lbutbecaref
ul.Don’
tforgetwhyy
ouwent
t
here.Iwanttowatchyougraduate.”
“
Youwi
l
l.
”
“
Theywi
l
lal
lseet
hatmywi
tchcr
aftwor
ked.
”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Theywi
l
lswal
l
owt
hei
rwor
ds.
”
“
MmagweTumosay
sshewant
stospeakwi
thy
ou.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
HiKenny
…howar
eyou?
”
“
Iam f
ine.
”
“
Howar
eyouf
indi
ngGabor
one?
”
“
Fine.
”
“Ij
ustwant edtot ellyout hatyourbestf r
iendissafe
i
nmyhands.Iknowy ouwor r
yconsi der
ingwhat
oncehappenedt het imeshewast akenbyar elat
ive
buttrustme, hereshei ssaf e.Iwasonceanur se
andIknowhowt or elatetosomeonewi thher
conditi
on.Iwi l
lnev erstarveherf orsheismy
husband’ssister,theonl ysisterheisleftwit
h.He
l
ov esherdear l
yandt hatmeansIhav et
ol oveher
too.”
“
Eemma.
”
“
Good,
Ijustwant
edt
osety
ourhear
tatease.
”
“
Eemma,
thanky
ou.
”
“Youar
ewel
come.Ihav
egi
venherf
ood,
shei
snow
eati
ng.
”
“
Ok.Gosi
ame.
”
Shedr
oppedt
hecal
lanswer
ingAr
ona’
scal
l
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Opent
hedoor
.”
Shequi ckl
ygotoutoft hebat htubanddr ainedthe
wat erwrappingatowel aroundherbodyt henwent
toopenf orhim.Aronalookedatherwetbody
walkinginhol di
nghiscarkey s.Heclosedt hedoor
takingoffhiswett-shi
rtthenpul l
edherf orakiss.
Kennyputherhandsonhi schestcatchinghi s
alcoholbreath.
“
Youdr
inkal
cohol
too?
”
Ar
onal ookedathersmil
i
ngandki ssedheragai
n
dr
oppinghertowel.Hi
sslidhi
shandbet weenher
l
egstouchingherpussythenKennysteppedback
pi
cki
nghert owel
.
“
It
’spai
nful
.Wewi
l
ldot
omor
row.
”
“
Imi
ssy
ou.Tomor
rowi
stoof
ar.
”
“
NgngRona.I
t’
spai
nful
.It
hinkmay
bey
oucr
acked
me.
”
“
Letmesee.
”
“
No.
”
Aronapickedherupthrowingheroverhisshoul
der
andt ookhertothebedr
oom wherehel ayherdown
onthebed.Hi sphonestart
edvibr
ati
nginhispocket
.
Het ookitoutasKennygotoffbedandt ookher
pantiesfr
om herbag.Sheputthem onwhi l
ehe
droppedt hecal
landputthephonedown.
“
Thereasonwhyit
’spai
nful
isbecausei
t’
sthef
ir
st
t
imewehav eev
erhadsex.Ifwekeep-
“
Shepi
ckedherpant
sthensl
i
dinonel
eg.“
Ngng.
”
Ar
onawal kedovert
hent
ookt
hepant
sfr
om her
.“I
wi
llbegentle.
”
Shel
ookedathisboner.“
Aronagobotl
oko.Cany
ou
gi
vei
tabreak,wewilldotomorr
ow.”
Hedroppedherpantsandki
ssedherpul
l
ingdown
herpant
ies.Kennypul
l
edthem back.
“
Rona…ret
adirakamoso.Yourdi
cki
stoobi
g,we
wi
ll
dotomorr
ow.Letmeheal.”
“
Nngng,
Iwanty
ounow.
”
Hepickedherupt henl ai
dheront hebedgetti
ng
betweenherlegswhi l
eshehel dherpantywithbot
h
hands.Hekissedhert aki
ngt hedickoutwhil
eKenny
hel
dherpant i
estightl
y.Ar onapul
ledhercl
oser
pushi
ngherlegsf urt
herapar tt
henpushedher
panti
estothesideandpushedt hroughherswoll
en
fl
apssli
dinginherwar mness.Shel etgoofher
panti
esfl
inchingashisdi ckstr
etchedit
’swayin.
“
Uhhh.
.Ronaaaaaa…”
Hekissedhersof tl
y,herpussyhugginghimt i
ghtl
y.I
t
fel
tsogoodhej ustwantedtof uckherhardbut
l
ookingi nhertearf
uleyes,hereall
ydidn’
twantto
hurtherandscar eheroff.Hest ar
tedshowerngher
wit
hki sses,hi
shandscar essi
ngherbodywhi le
makingsl owlovetoher.
.
Kennymov edherwai stmoani ngasAr onaconti
nued
witht
hosedeepst rokes.Wav esofpleasurehither
thensheclosedherey estearful
lyspasming.Arona
grunt
edi nhereargivi
ngheracoupl emor estrokes
thendisposedhisseedsinside.
“
FuckIl
ovey
ou…”
Helayont opofheral
mostsuff
ocat
ingherwi
thhis
weightthengotof
fandlaybesi
deherl
eavi
ngatrai
l
ofhiscum.
Hepull
edheri
nhi
sar
msandki
ssedher
.“Ar
eyou
hungr
y?”
“
Ng…”
“
Whatshoul
dIgety
ou?
”
Kennytur
nedl
yi
ngonherst
omachasherpussy
thr
obbed.
“Babe…whatdoy
ouwantt
oeat
?Shoul
dIget
pizza?
”
Kennycl
osedhereyestaki
ngdeepbreat
hs.Arona
ki
ssedherbackcar
essingher
.“Ongadil
e?(Ar
ey ou
angry
?)I
t’
sok,wewi l
ldotomorr
ow.WhatshouldI
gety
ou?
”
“
Idon’
twantt
ohav
esexany
mor
e.”
Hepausedthensmil
ed.“
That
’si
mpossi
ble,
any
thi
ng
el
sethatIcangety
ou?”
Shekeptqui
etsulki
ngthenhekissedherneckand
gotof
fbed.“Ok,Iwil
lj
ustgety
ouany t
hing.
”

*
**

LesangdroveinAr ona’
sgat eandsmiledst
aringat
hiscarwhil
eitrai
nedheav i
l
y.Sheparkedneart he
doorthengotherumbr el
laandsteppedoutinjusta
redcoat.Shewalkedt othedoorandknocked
smili
ng.Aronaf r
ownedopeni ngthedoorstaringat
her.
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”
“
Won’
tyoul
etmei
n?I
t’
srai
ning.
”
“
No.Leav
e.”
Sher
oll
edherey
essmi
l
ingt
henopenedhercoat
maki
nghi
mlookatherwhi
tel
i
nger
ie.
“Letmein…Iknowyouareangr
ywithme,pr
obabl
y
hateme…Iam heresoyoucanfuckmehowevery
ou
want.Puni
shmewi t
hthatbi
gdi
ck.”
“May beatsomepoi ntIwoul dhaveactuall
ydone
thatbecauseIwasbl i
ndedbywhatIbel ievedtobe
l
ov e.ButIam notthatsameAr ona.Youlook
patheticri
ghtnowi t
’sact ual
l
ydisgusti
ng.Iam
actuallyseei
ngyouf orthewhor eyouareandIcan’t
believeIneversawitbef orebutyouknowwhat ,Iam
glady oukepthurt
ingmebecauseInowseey oufor
whoy ouare.
”
Shelaughed.“
Iknowyoul
ovemeRona,comeon,
openforme.Iam get
ti
ngcol
d.Imi
ssyou.”
“
Idon’
tmissyourcommunitypussy.Idon’
teven
l
oveyouanymore.Themoreyoukepthur t
ingme,
t
hemorethatl
ovev ani
shedandtodayit’
sgone,
f
orev
er.
”
“
Stopl
yi
ngt
oyour
sel
f.
”
“
Thisi
sbyf art
hemosthonestIhav
ebeenwit
h
mysel
f.Iam ov
ery
ou.Goandgi vey
ourcommuni
ty
pussyt
oDani
el.Getoutofmyhouse.
”
“
Youknowwhat
?”
Shetookastepbackt ost
andpr operl
ythenmi ssed
astepandfelli
ntothemud.Aronal ookedather
unmov edastherai
npouredonher .Embarrassed,
shegotupandt ri
edtowalkbutslippedagain
l
andingonherface.Shetookofftheshoest henheld
them i
nherhandsandwal kedtohercarwher eshe
gotinanddroveoffal
lmuddy .

FOURMONTHSLATER
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#21

FourMont
hsLat
er…

Laterthatday ,
atschool,Kennywalkedoutofthe
school premiseswi t
hherearphonespluggedtoher
ears.Namet sor ushedovertoherthentappedher
shoulder.Kennyt ookoffherear
phonesandsmi led.
“Hey
,It
houghty
ouwer
est
il
ldoi
ngy
ourgr
oup
assi
gnment
.”
Nametsosmi l
ed.“Waai,
wemanagedt ofi
nishi
tov
er
WhatsApp,
theot hergi
rlsai
dshewil
l t
ypeand
submit
.Isyourgroupdonewi t
hthei
rs?”
“Yeah,Iwaspai
redlebathobabaserious,(wi
th
seri
ouspeople,
)wedidtheassignmentthedaywe
recei
veditandsubmit
teditt
hroughemai l
thatsame
day.”
“
Idon’tl
ikegr
oupassi
gnment
swheny
ouar
epai
red
wi
thlazypeopl
e.”
“
Iknow,
met
oo.
”
Theywal
kedt
oget
hert
ogetacombi
.
“
Ihav
eanassi
gnmentthatneedst
obet
yped,
can
y
ouborr
owmey ourl
aptop?”
Kennylaughed.“Heel
a,gakenal apt
op.(Idon’
thav
ea
l
aptop.
)Ihav ebeensavingf ori
tthoughbutIdon’
t
haveone.Iusemyboy friend’s.
”
Nametsolaughed.“
Soallal
ongwhenIt
houghty
ou
hadone,y
ouwer ejustl
i
keme? ”
“Iam j
ustl
i
keyoubutIhav
emyboyfri
end’sathome
soyoucancomeandt y
peatmyhouse.”
“
Thankst
sal
a.”
Theystoodatt
hebusstopwai
ti
ngforacombit
hen
Kenny’
sphonerang.Namet
sol
ookedasKenny
answeredheri
Phone8.
“
Heybabe.
.”
“
Howwasi
t?”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Igot71%.
”
“
Whoknewt
hest
upi
donewoul
dbet
heonenai
l
ing
herexams?
”
Shelaughed.“
Ther
rawenaIr
eadhar
dfort
hat
exam.”
“
Youdi
d,Iam pr
oudofy ou.Ket
senamomeeting,I
wi
ll
comeandcollecty
ouassoonasIam done.”
“
Ok,
don’
tfor
gett
heUSB.
”
“
Ial
readyboughti
t.Iwi
l
lbr
ingi
t.
”
“
Ok,
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Shehungupandputt hephonebacki
nherbag.
Nametsolookedatherhai
rst
yle.“
Whendi
dyou
changeyourhai
rst
yle?
”
“
Yest
erday
.”
“Yourboy
fri
endspoi
l
syout
lhe!Ei
sh,
Iwi
shIcanf
ind
suchaman.”
Kennylaughedthenstoppedthecombi .They
j
umpedi nasNamet so’sphoner ang.Sheignoredit
asitr
angt hensear
chedf ori
tinherbagwheni t
st
oppedswi tchi
ngitoff
.Awhi lelaterbothgir
lsgot
outofthecombi .Kennyhandedthedri
veraP10
notetopayherf ai
rwhil
eNamet sosearchedherbag.
Kennyr ecei
vedherchangewhileNamet sosti
l
l
searched,ever
yonenowst ar
ingather
.Kenny
handedt hedri
verherchangethencl
osedt hecombi
door.
NametsolookedatKennyandsighedastheywal
ked
home.“Thankyou,mybagisprett
yold,
themoney
hi
desit
self.Iwi
l
lpayyouback.
”
“
No,
it’
sok.
”
“Ei
sh,t
hanks.Kanatheal l
owancei sreall
ynot
enough.Af
terpayi
ngr entandtakingoutt r
ansport
money,Iam l
eftwit
hbar elynot
hingandf rom thereI
havetobuyfood.LastnightIhadt osleeponwat er.
”
Kennysadl
ylookedather
.“Youknowy oucan
al
wayscomeov eratmyhouse.LennaIdon’thav
e
muchbutIcanshareaplatewit
hyou.”
Namet
solookedathertear
ful
l
ythenst
opped
wal
ki
ngputt
ingherhandsoverherf
acecr
ying.
“
Idon’
tthinkIam goi
ngtosur
viv
emuchlonger.I
t’
s
r
eal
lyhardbuteveryt
imeIthi
nkoft
hesi
tuati
onback
home…”
Kennyhuggedherrubbi
ngherbackwhi
l
eshecri
ed.
Minut
eslaterNametsocal
meddownandchuckl
ed.
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
It
’sok.Let
’sgo.
”
Theywalkedhomet henKennyt ookhertoherr oom.
Shewalkedwi t
hNamet sobehindher.Namet sogot
i
nandf r
ozeatt hedoorstar
ingatKenny ’
sr oom.She
l
ookedatthebedwi thwhitebeddingandl otof
pi
ll
owsoni tthenatthe32inchTVmount edt othe
wall
andhersubwoof ersont hesmallgl
asst able.
Theothercornerwasherstudy i
ngwhitetableanda
whit
echair.
Kennylookedather.“
Ther
eist
helapt
op.
”She
poi
ntedatt hetabl
ewher
ethel
apt
opwas.“Youcan
doyourthing.”
“
Ok.
”
Nametsotookoffhershoesthenst
eppedonthe
whit
efluf
fycar
petwhichstoppedneart
hesideof
Kenny’
skit
chenandsatont hechai
ropeni
ngthe
l
apt
opwhi
l
eKennyundr
essed.
“
Yourhousei
sreal
l
yni
ce…y
ouboughtal
lthese
t
hings?
”
“
Some, someIgott
hem f
rom myboy
fri
end,
he
wasn’
tusingt
hem.”
Nametsolookedaroundalr
eadytel
l
ingwhi
chones
Kennycouldhavepossi
blyboughtf
orher
sel
fand
whatherboyfr
iendgother.
“
Iam goi
ngt
otakeabat
h.”
“
Ok.
”
Namet sot
ookoutherassignmentt henst art
ed
typingwhileKennytookashower .Awhi lelater
Kennywal kedoutthendressedup.Namet sol ooked
atherenv i
ously
,evenherclotheswer enice.She
doubt edKennydidanythi
ngforherself,probablyher
boy fr
ienddidi
tall
.Shealwayssawt hebl ackBMW
parkedi nf
rontofherhousemostni ghts,nev erreal
ly
sawt heguyupcl osebutfr
om adi stanceshecoul d
tell
hewasoneoft hosesupergoodl ookingmen.
Namet
sof
ini
shedupherassi
gnmentt
henl
ookedat
Kennywhowasnowbusyonherphoneseat
edon
herbed.
“
Ok,
Iam done.
”
“
Alr
eady
?”
“
Yes.Iwi
l
lsubmi
titt
omor
row.
”
“
Ok,letmegi
vey ousomethi
ngtoeat.
”Kenny
wal
kedtoherfr
idgeandtookouttheChi
ckenl
icken
l
eft
oversf
rom t
heprevi
ousnight
.
“Youcaneatt
his.
”Shehandedhera2l
i
tterbot
tl
eof
coke
Nametsotookt
hef
oodt
henhuggedKenny
.“Thank
youKenny
.”
“I
t’
sok.Iwasoncei
nyourshoessoIunder
stand
howitfeel
s.”
Acardr ov
einoutside,Namet soputonhershoes
thentookherbagandf oodjustasKenny ’
sdoor
openedandamanwal kedin.Namet so’shear
t
skippedashelookedathert henst eppedoverand
kissedKennywhobl ushedgi ggl
ing.
“
UhName,
Iwi
l
lseey
ouar
ound.
”
“
Yeah,
thanks.By
e.”
Shewal kedoutclosi
ngthedoorbehi
ndherthen
walkedt oherapart
mentandpassedherl
esbian
roommat ewhowasdr i
nki
ngwithherf
ri
endswho
alsolookedli
kemenormay besomewere,she
couldn’
tbesur e.
“
Hi…”
Ther
oommat el
ookedatherandsmi
l
ed.“
Hi,
you
canj
oinus.
”
Namet soshookherheaduncomfor
tabl
e.“
NoIam
f
ine.Ihaveanexam tomorr
ow.”
“
Ok.
”
Shegoti nherr oom thenputev eryt
hingdownand
l
ayonhermat tr
ess,herhandsonherf aceunabl eto
takeoutKenny ’sboy f
ri
endf rom hermi nd.Godt hat
walkandt hewayhehadl ookedather , shecoul d
swearshef elthisdomi nancefrom wher eshewas
standing.Hewaspr obablythetypthatf uckedy ou
ti
llyoucoul dn’twalk.Theki ndshewoul dn’tmi nd
getti
ngpr egnantf or.Shepausedf eelingsl ightl
y
guil
ty,forgoodnesssaket hiswasherpot ential
f
ri
end’
smanbutdamn…shecoul
donl
yimagi
ne
l
i
vingKenny
’sl
i
fei
fhewasher
s.

*
**

Ar
onaki
ssedKennyt
henshest
eppedbackf
eel
i
ng
hi
sdi
ckj
erkinhi
spants.
“
Letmeputonmyshoessowecango.
”
Helookedatherinhershortdr
essthatshowedher
smoothlegs.Herhipswerenowshowingevenmore
andherskintonewasmuchmor ecl
earer
.She
walkedtoherwardrobewhereshetookoutherf
li
p
fl
opsandputt hem on.Shel
ookedbackathim.
“I
sthi
sok?It
’sapoolpart
yri
ght?Youwil
lfi
ndthat
ever
yonedr
essedtokil
lwhil
eIam dr
essedso
si
mple.”
Aronawalkedoverput
ti
nghishandsonherwai
st
thenki
ssedher.“Youl
ookbeauti
ful
.”
Kennysmil
edt
henpi
ckedherphonef
rom t
hebed.
“Let
’sgot
hen.
”
Hewalkedoutwit
hhert henshelockedashe
openedthedoorf
orher.Shewalkedov erandgot
i
nsidethecart
henhejumpedi nanddrov eout
.
“
Igoty
ousomet
hing.
”
Hereachedbehindt
hentookt
heclassBdri
vi
ng
quest
ioncat
aloguebookandhandeditt
oher.
“Youneedtogetal
icense.Idi
dn’
tbuyi
tforyouso
youleav
eitatmyhouse,youevenhidi
tunderthe
bed.
”
Kennyl
aughedget
ti
ngthebook.“
AhhnnarraIam
tool
azy
.Therei
sajustalott
oreadher
e.”
“
Peopl
ereadt
hati
noneweekorev
enl
ess.
”
“
Can’
tIj
ustgoandwr
it
ewhatIknow?
”
“
Andwhatdoy
ouknow?Youdon’
tknowany
thi
ng.
”
“
Arey
ouget
ti
ngmeacar
?”
Ar
onachuckl
ed.“
Onl
yaf
tery
ougety
ourdegr
ee.
”
“
Babet
henwhat
’st
heuse?Iwi
l
ljustr
eadi
tthen.
”
“
Keneil
we,nextweekFri
dayyouar
egoingtowri
te
t
hatexam andyouaregoingt
opass,
from t
her
ey ou
ar
egoi
ngt
odr
ivi
ngschool
.”
Shelookedathi
m assai
ditoutf
ir
mlyt
hensmil
ed.
“Doyouknowhowsexyy ouarewheny
ouareal
l
ser
ious?”
Aronalookedatherthenshyl
ysmi l
edturni
ngback
toroad.“Youshoul
dgetal i
cense.Iam ser
ious.I
t
mightcomei nhandy.”
Shenodded.“
Eer
ra.
”
Helookedatheragai
nthensmi
l
edshaki
nghi
shead
dr
ivi
ngtohisbrot
her’
spart
y.
*
**

Mothusiparkedthelongt
ruckatMark’
sgaragein
Gaboronethensteppedoutandgavethekeysto
anot
herdriver.
“
Sur
elai
taka.
.”
Mot
husi
smi
l
ed.“
Eish,
feel
sgoodt
obebackhome.
”
Br
ightl
aughed.“
Iknowt
hatf
eel
i
ng.Idon’
tli
ket
he
l
ongdist
ancetri
ps.
”
“
Theyusedt
oexci
temebutnowahh…”
Theybot
hlaughed.“
Soy
ouar
etaki
ngt
hebust
o
Maun?”
“Yes,t
heev eni
ngbus.Mygi r
lf
ri
endgav
ebirt
htwo
weeksback, Iwanttoseemyson.Iam soexci
tedto
seethem.Shesentpi ct
uresandei
sh…IwishIcan
j
ustflyther
e.Ifeell
i
kear ealman.
”
“Whydon’
tyou?Fl
yingismuchbett
erthanthebus.
Shamwari
,don’
tli
mityour
selfni
cet
hingsinli
fe
whenyoucannowaf f
ordthem.”
Mothusi
chuckled.“Iwoul
dbutIhavebeensav
ing
ev
erycent.Iwanttomar r
ySel
etso.
”
“Ahhcongr
ats,
Ihavebeeninvi
tedtothispar
tytoday
,
Idon’
tknowwhoi si
tforbutIwanttojustl
oosenup,
youcancomewi t
h.”
“
Mybusi
sleav
ingathal
f9.
”
“I
t’
sjustaf
ter5,
Iwil
ldr
ivey
outostat
ionaround9.
Comeandhav efun,
youhavebeenawayfortoo
l
ong.”
“
Ok…whatki
ndofapar
tyi
sit
?”
“That’
sthet
hingaboutbei
nggat
ecrusher
s,you
don’tneedt
oknow.Let’
sgo.Mycarisher
e.”
Br
ightl
edhi
mtohi
scarwhi
l
eMot
husi
cal
l
edSel
etso.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Heybabe,Ihavear
riv
ed.Iam taki
ngt
heev
eni
ng
bus.Iwi
llbetherei
nthemorning.”
“
Ican’
twai
ttoseey
ou.Imi
ssedy
ou.
”
“Metoo.Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?I
stheoper
ati
onst
il
l
pai
nful
?”
“
Yes.I
t’
spai
nful
butmymom i
shel
ping.
”
“
Ican’
twai
ttoseehi
m.”
“
Met oo.Ihav
etof
eedhi
m,cal
lmeaf
teraf
ew
minut
es.’
“
Ok.
”
Hehungupsmil
i
ngthenputhisphonei
nhi
spocket
.
Br
ightdr
ovet
hem t
othepart
y.

*
**
InShakawe, Tshenolo’
smothertearfull
ywatchedas
Tshenologruntedinpaincry
ing.Herhusband
walkedholdingthebottl
eofwar m water,hermother
tookitthenputitonherstomacht ot r
yandeaset he
pain.Herfather
’sheartbr
okewat chinghisdaughter
cryinpainthenhet ookoutt
hest rongpainkil
l
ers
from hi
spocket .
“
Justgi
veher
.”
Hiswifequickl
ytookt hem t
hengrabbedtheglassof
waterandgav eTshenolo2t odri
nk.Tshenolo
swall
owedt hem thenlaydownwai t
ingforthem t
o
kicki
n.Withinminutessherelaxedasthepainfaded
thenherparentssighedwhilethepi
ll
sknockedher
down.
“
Iam scar
edsheisget
ti
ngaddi
ctedt
othepi
l
ls.Ev
en
t
hedoctor
ssaidso.
”
“
Therei
snot hingwecandorragweTshenol
o,he
f
ail
edtohelpherandsheisalwaysinpai
n.Iam
t
ell
i
ngyou, t
hatwoman’shusbanddidsomethi
ngto
mydaughter.Thedoct
orcoul
dn’tf
indanyt
hing
wr
ongwi
thher
.It
’swi
tchcr
aft
.”
“
Doy ouhavet
oassoci
ateev
ery
thi
ngwi
th
wi
tchcr
aft
?”
“Becausei
tis.Ihear
dther
eisafor
eignpast
or
comingtoMaun, hedoesmir
acl
es.Weshouldgo.
”
“
YouknowIdon’
tbel
i
evei
nthosescammer
s.”
“WellIdoandIam takingmydaught ert
here.That
bleedingwomanwhot ouchedJesusgothealed
becauseshehadfaith,Ihavef ai
tht
hati
fIgot her
e
andt hepast
orpr
aysf orher,shewil
lgethealed.
”
ShesatbesideTshenol ocaressi
nghercheekwhile
shesl ept
.

*
**

Atthepart
y,Mothusiwal
kedatt hepool swherea
bunchofpeoplewereholdi
ngt hei
rdrinkswhilegood
musicplay
ed.Theygottheirbeersthenstoodby
watchi
ng.Mothusil
ookedar oundthenf r
ozestari
ng
atsomeonewhol ookedli
keKennyl aughing.Some
guykissedherputti
nghishandsonherwaistt
hen
sheturned.Mothusitookagoodlookandswall
owed
star
ingather.I
twasher ,hewas100%sure.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#22

Atsi
lewhisper
edsomet hingtohisbr otherasKenny
si
ppedonherj ui
cesitt
ingonRona’ sl ap,herheadon
hi
schest.Sheshookherheadashewal kedaway ,
Rona’sy
oungerbrotherlookedli
ket henaught iest
outofal
lofthem, hesomet i
mesr emi ndedherof
Tshenol
o.Ronakissedherneck.
“
Theyar
eher
e.Letmet
ell
thecr
owd.
”
Hest
oodupandst
oodi
nfr
ontofev
ery
onesmi
l
ing.
“Okguy s,theyar ehere.Wear egoingtoswi t
chof f
allli
ghtssowhenwescr eam, theyhaveheart
attacksanddi e.”Peoplelaughed.“Iam joki
ng,they
willdieebegot wekenna. ”Hesmi ledthatcharming
smi l
eofhi sthatshef oundherselflooki
ngaroundt o
seehowt heladieswer estari
ngathi m whil
ehe
stoodt her
eal li
nhi sgrace.
“
Ohhhoneyt
heyar
elust
ingov
erhi
m.”
Kennyt
urnedandl
ookedatPeowhosmi
l
ed.“
Hi…”
PeohuggedKenny
.“Heyl
ove,
eish,
youl
ook
beaut
if
ul.
”
“
Thanks,
yout
oo.
”
Peol ookedatherbumpandr ol
ledherey
es.“Oh
please…Ilooksobig.Ican’tevendoanythi
ng
anymor e.Ri
ghtnowIj ustwanttosit
,assoonasEsi
comest hrough,Iam goingtoli
edown.Lookat
those…”
Kennyt
urnedandlookedatt
het
wol
adi
esgi
ggl
i
ng
whil
est
aringatAr
ona.
“TheyareMoesi ’ssi
sters.Everyti
meIlookatthem, I
seesnakeshel a.Notev enthepinksnakesdressed
i
nwhi t
ef ur,
nyaa, bl
ackmambahel ayedangerous.
Thekindy oumeeti nthef or
est.Theuntamedone.
Theonet hatattacksunpr ov
oked.Moesi nev
er
wantstoseet hem any wherenearherhouse.Iswear
i
fIseeoneoft hem playingclosetomyman, Iam
goingtogot ojail
.”
“It
rustRona.Hehasnev
ergi
venmeanyr
easont
o
doubthim.”
Peosmi
l
ed.“
Youshoul
dbutdon’
tfor
gett
oleav
e
room fordi
sappointment.Amanwi ll
disappoi ntyou
somuchKennyt hatyouwi l
lbesoembar rassed.
Kanawhent hisgenderembar r
assesyou, theymake
sure.ButRonalovesy oueventhoughwhenmeet
someonedoesn’ tknow,theywil
lthi
nky ouar ehis
nieceorsomething.”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Don’
tsayt
hat
.”
“Youl
ookli
kehisdaughter
.Ebil
ekesugardaddy
.
Youragedi
ff
erenceisnotajoke.
”
“Peopl
earealwaysstari
ngatusi npubli
candIcan
alr
eadytel
lwhattheyarethinki
ng.Ketholakeswaba
becauseworse,heistouchy.Hewill
bekissingme
sothatever
yonecansee, ”
“Butt
histhingcal
ledl
ovei sfunny,i
tdoesn’tcar
e
aboutage.Thatmaniscr azyaboutyou,that’
swhatI
know.Andhei shappy.Justtreathi
mr i
ght,he’s
beenthroughital
lwit
hLesang. ”
Kennysmi l
edthenturnedbacktoAronawhowas
nowtalki
ngt oLebi
tsoandAt si
l
e.Theli
ghtswentof
f
thenever
yonewentsi l
ent.MoesiandMaatlawal
ked
overl
ight
ingtheplacewiththei
rphones,
theli
ght
s
cameont
henev
ery
onescr
eamed.
“
SURPRI
SE!
”
Maatlajumpedinfrontofhisfi
ancét heneveryone
l
aughed.Thecoupleslowlygotwhatwasgoi ngon
aandlaughedal
ongwi theveryoneelse.Maatla
l
ookedathisbrothersshakinghisheadast heDJ
star
tedplayi
ngthemusi c.Theyhuggedt henMoesi
walkedovertowhereKennywasst andingwithPeo.
“
Andt
heny
out
wo?
”
Theyall
laughedhuggi
ngt
henMoesi
smi
l
edst
ari
ng
atKenny.
“
Nnanany
ana.
”
Kennyl aughedasMoesi
pinchedhercheeks.
“Bathong,tswangmogonna.(Peopl
e,leaveme
alone.)
”
PeolookedatMoesi l
aughing.“Lastweekt herewas
afootball
came,Bit
sosayst heguysall wentto
Rona’
shousebecausetheywer egoi ngtowat chthe
gamet here,
gat
weebeRonaasabol el ebati
mmaa
pagamilengwana.(
ApparentlyRonadidn’topenthe
doorri
dingt
hechi
ld.
)Bitsosay
stheycoul
dheart
he
soundscomingf
rom thehousegolebusy
.
Moesij
oinedinlaughi
ng.“
Ihear
d,Maat
latol
dme
gotwebabe,kanaRonaotlabol
ayangwanakago
rat
amorobalo.”
Embarrassed,
Kennysmi
l
edsi
l
ent
lyast
heyl
aughed
ather
.
Moesipausedthensmi l
edstar
ingatKenny.“
Kana
Ronaol ebegaarat
asexgore.Heisthequiet
brot
hermmesomet hi
ngtel
lsmebehindclosed
doors,
gomasweny ana.
”
Peol
aughed.“
Gof
uckenbehi
ndcl
oseddoor
s.”

*
**

From adist
ance,Mothusi
drankhi
sbeerstari
ngat
Kenny,hesti
ll
hadn’
tfoundtheri
ghtf
ulopport
unit
y
toactual
l
ywal kuptoherandsayhi
.Bri
ghtlookedat
him.
“
Soy
oust
il
lwanther
?”
“
Who?
”
“
Thatgi
rl
.”
“
No.
”
Br
ightlaughed.“
Youhav
enor
easont
oli
etome.I
am notyourbabymama.”
Mothusilookedathi
m andshookhi
shead.“
That
guyisthesameguyshewaswi thbef
orewebroke
up.Irememberhim.”
“
Soshewascheat
ing?
”
“
Obvi
ousl
y,i
t’
snowclearwhyshej
ustbrokeupwi
th
meandqui
cklymov
edon.Iwanttotal
ktoher.
”
“
Okbutbecareful
,herboy
fri
endl
ooksl
i
ket
het
ype
t
ofuckyouup.”
Kennyseparatedfrom t
heladiesthenwalkedaway.
MothusihandedBr i
ghthisdr
inkthenfol
lowedafter
hertothetoi
lets.
“
Kenny
…”
Kennyt
urnedt
henl
ookedathi
m.“
Mot
husi
?”
Hesmi
l
ed.Shel
ookedsomuchbet
ternow,
even
morebeautiful
.Hercurl
yweav ethatl
ookedalmost
l
ikeherrealhai
rmadeherl ookli
kethoseladi
eshe
sawonI nst
agram especi
all
ywithheredgeslai
d
perf
ectl
y.
“
Hey
…”
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”
“
Igoti
nvi
tedbyaf
ri
end.
”
“
Oh…”
“
Youl
ookgood.
”
Shenodded.“
Sodoy
ou.
”
“
Yeah…Igotaj
ob,
asat
ruckdr
iver
.”
“
That
’sni
ce.Goodf
ory
ou.
”
“
Thanks.
”
Theylookedateachotherforawhi
let
henMot husi
rubbedhishandstoget
her.“Wast
hatyourboy
friend?
Thetallguy
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Wheny
ourgr
andmot
hergotsi
ck,
washet
hesame
onewhot
ookhert
othehospi
tal
?”
“Wemett hatday
.Inevercheat
edonyou.Ionl
y
star
teddati
nghim whenIcamehere.
”
Henodded.“
Imi
ssy
ou.
”
Kennysighed.“
Pleasedon’
tdothis.Myboy
fri
end
wouldn’
tevenli
key ouandIt
alki
ng.”
“Ist
il
lloveyoubutIhav
eaccept
edt
hef
actIwi
l
l
probablynevergety
ouback.
”
“
Youneedt
oleav
e.”
“
CanIhugy
ou?Fort
hel
astt
ime.
”
“
Mot
husi
,Ihav
eaboy
fri
endand-
“
“
Justanof
fi
cial
goodby
ehug.Pl
ease…”

*
**

Ar
onachatt
edwit
hhi sbrot
hersandf
ri
endthen
l
ookedar
oundhopingtoseeKennybutshewasn’
t
wi
thPeoandMoesi anymore.
“
Iam comi
ng.
”
Hewalkedov
ert
oMoesi
andPeo.“
Hey
,wher
eis
Kenny
?”
“
Shewentt
othet
oil
et.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hi
sphoner
angashewal
kedf
rom t
hel
adi
es.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Hi
,i
t’
sCandy.Ij
usthadabr eakdownandIwas
wonder
ingi
fyoucouldhelpme.Ican’tseem t
obe
abl
etogethol
dofany one.
”
“Hey,l
etmet
alkt
omygi
rl
fr
iendf
ir
stt
hengetback
atyou.
”
“
Ohok.
”
Hehungupmaki
nghi
m wayt
othet
oil
ets.

*
**

I
nthet
oil
et,
Kennyl
ookedatMot
husi
.
“
Ican’
t,kekopagor
eot
samay
e.(
Cany
oupl
ease
l
eave.
)”
Henodded.“
It
’sok,
Iunder
stand.
”
Thet oil
etdooropenedt henAronawal kedin,his
phoneonhi sear .Kenny ’
sphonestartedringingin
herpocket.Ar onalookedatbot hofthem whi leher
heartpounded.Hecl osedt hedoorslidinghisphone
i
nhispocket ,Mot husil
ookedatt heman, hi
s
i
ntestinestwisti
ngpainf ul
ly,
heswallowedf eelingas
i
fhewasget tingparalyzed.Thewayt hismanwas
j
ustlookingathi m scaredtheshitoutofhi m.
“
What
’sgoi
ngonher
e?Who’
sthi
s?”
Mothusi
lookedatKennywhovi
sibl
ylookedscared
tooormaybeitwasjusthi
sownfearmakingthi
nk
shewasfeeli
ngwhathewasfeel
ing.
“
Kenei
l
wewar
ekemangmot
hoo?
”
KennylookedatRona.“
Uhht hi
sisMothusi
,hei
smy
ex.Hefoll
owedmeher einsi
dethetoi
l
et.Idi
dn’
t
evenknowhewasher e.”
Mot
husi
puthi
sshaki
nghandsbehi
ndhi
sback
knowingifitcametoafi
ght
,hewoul
dn’
tbeabl
eto
standagainsttheman.
“
Doy
ouhav
eany
thi
ngt
hatbel
ongst
ohi
m?”
“
No.Hesai
dhewant
edt
otal
k.”
“
Arey
oudonet
alki
ngnow?
”
“
Yes,
hei
sleav
ing.
”
Mot
husiwal
kedt
othedoorbutAr
onast
oodst
il
lnot
mov
ing.“
Wakae?(Wher
eareyougoi
ng?)
”
“
Iam sor
ry,
Iam j
ustl
eav
ing.Wear
edonet
alki
ng.
”
“
Youarenotgoi
nganywhere.
”HelookedatKenny.
“
Didy
oudowhaty ouwantedtodointhetoi
l
et?”
Kennyshookherheadunabl
etor
eadhi
smood
thoughshecoul
dtell
hewasnowher
ecloset
obei
ng
happy.
“
Thendowhaty
oucameher
etodo.
”
Kennyopenedthetoi
letcubi
cleandgotin.Herhear
t
waspoundingsofastshecouldn’
tevenpee.Sheput
herhandonherchesttryi
ngtocalm down,she
hadn’
tdoneanythi
ngwr ongorhadshe?Shef l
ushed
t
het
oil
ett
henwal
kedoutandwashedherhands.
“
Let
’sgo.
”
Heopenedthedoor
.“Youcango,
Iwi
l
lbewi
thy
oui
n
afewseconds.
”
Kennyl
ookedatMothusiwhowasv
isi
blyshaki
ng,
fearwr
it
tenal
lov
erhisface.
“
Go,
Iwantt
ohav
eal
i
ttl
echatwi
thhi
m.”
Kennyl
ookedbackatMothusi
thenbackatRona
andwal
kedout.Shewal
kedovertowhereMoesi
was.
“
Hey
…Ronawasl
ooki
ngf
ory
ou.
”
“Heisatthet
oil
et.Myexfol
l
owedmet ot
hetoi
l
et
thenRonawalkedinwhi
lewetal
ked.Iam so
scared.
”
“
Washedoi
ngany
thi
ngi
nappr
opr
iat
e?”
“
No.Justtal
king.Buti
nsi
det
het
oil
ets.KanaRona
waboul
ela.”
Moesil
aughed.“
Hei
spr
obabl
yjustscar
ri
nghi
m of
f,
t
hat’
sall
.”
“Scarri
nghim offf
orwhat?Iam nothi
scheati
ngex
gir
lfr
iend.Mothusidi
dn’
tdoanythi
ngwrong.”
“
Howwouldy oufeel
ify
ouhadt
ofi
ndhi
mint
he
t
oil
etwi
thLesang?”
“
Iam notgoi
ngt
obehav
eli
kehei
sdoi
ng.
”
“Youdon’ tev
enknowwhathei sdoing.Whatift
hey
arehavingapeacefulconversati
on?Amanwhoi si
n
l
ov ewil
l doever
ystupidthi
ngi nthebook.Justwai
t
foryourmanher e.
”
Kennyt
ookherphonet
hensenthi
m amessage.
Kenny:I
fyoupunchhi mli
keyoudidwit
hKi ng,Iam
l
eavingyou.Iam notgoi
ngtobeinarelat
ionship
wit
hav i
olentman.
Shesentt
hemessageandsi
ghed.“
Wher
eisPeo?
”
“
Theyl
eft
.Shesai
dshei
sti
red.
”
“
Oh…”
Aronahuggedhim herf
rom behi
ndki
ssi
ngherneck
thenhewhisper
edinherearrubbi
nghi
sdickonher
butt
.“Comehere.”
Moesishookherhead.“
Pleasedon’
tgowi
thher
,I
am al
lal
onehere.
”
Ronaki
ssedKennycheek.“
Shei
scomi
ngback.
”
HetookKenny ’
shandandl edhert otheparkinglot
werethecarwaspar ked.Aronapushedheragai nst
thecarandkissedherhardthatKenny ’scl
it
thr
obbedashesqueezedherbr east.Itdi
dn’
tmakei t
easythatshewasov ulat
ingandther ewasan
i
ncreaseinhersexualdesir
es.
Hepausedthenlookedinhereyes.“
Tellmewhat
yousai
dony ourtext
.Iwanttohearitcomi
ngfr
om
yourmout
h.”
Shekeptqui
etthenheki
ssedheragai
n.“
Kennydo
yourememberwhatItol
dyoubeforey
ousaidyest
o
thi
srel
ati
onshi
p?”
“Iam notcheating.Iwouldnevercheatonyou
becauseIlov eyou.IloveyousomuchandIam not
Lesang.Mot husifol
lowedmet othetoil
et,
Idi
dn’
t
askhimt o,Ididnothingwrong.”
“
Inev
ersai
dyouar
eLesang.
”
“Youbehavel
ikeIam hersometimes.Somet i
mesi t
feel
sli
keIam walkingoneggshell
swithyou.You
haveahottempersomet i
mesi t
’sscar
y.”Tearsf
il
led
hereyesandroll
eddownhercheeks.“Iam notyour
ex,Iam meandIdeservemyf ai
rchancethatisnot
shadowedbyy ourpast
.”
Ronawipedawayhertear
st henki
ssedher.“
Iam
sor
ry.Youar
eri
ght.Iwil
lchange.I
t’
sjustt
hatIlove
youtoomuchIdon’twanttoloseyoutoanyone.”
“
Youarenotgoi
ngtolosemeunlessyoucheat,
Iwill
l
eaveyouwit
houtsecondt
houghtebi
l
eIwillnever
t
akeyouback.
”
Hesmiledt
henkissedherunzi
ppi
ngherjeansthen
sl
idhi
shandinsi
deherjeansandtouchedherwet
pussy
.
“
Fucky
ouarewet…kengosaapar
apant
y?(
Whyar
e
y
ounotwear
ingapant
y?)
”
Sheshookherheadasher
ubbedhercl
i
t.
“
Ret
samae?(
Shoul
dwego?
)”
“
Yout
hrewt
hispar
tyf
ory
ourbr
otherandhi
sfi
ancée
t
ocel
ebr
atewi
thhi
m notf
ory
out
oleav
e.”
Ronaunl
ockedthecarthenopenedthebackdoor
andgoti
nsi
dewi t
hher.Hisphonest
artedri
ngingas
heki
ssedher.Kennyl
ookedatthecall
erID.
“
Whyi
sshecal
l
ingy
ou?
”
“Shesai
dshehadabr
eakdownandwant
smet
o
comeand-“
“
Tel
lheryoucan’t
.”Sheshrugged.“
Youcan’
tleav
e
t
hepart
yyouthrewsot hat
-“
“
Youdon’
thav
etoexpl
ain,
Igeti
t.
”
Hepi
ckedCandy
’scal
lput
ti
ngheronl
oudspeaker
.
“
Hey
,ar
eyoucomi
ng?
”
“
No,
Ican’
t.Tr
ysomeoneel
se.
”
“RonaIam beggi
ngyou,pleaseIam stuckandIam
scared.Myphoneisal
mostof f.Iam t
ryi
ngtocal
l
peoplebutnooneispi
cking.Pleasehelpme.”
Hel
ookedatKenny
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#23

Candylookedatherphoneasi tswit
chedof fwhil
e
shesatinhercar
,alldoorsl
ocked.Shesi ghedthen
l
eanedbacknowhungr y
.Brightcarl
ightsmadeher
l
ookawayasacardr oveoverandpar kedbesides
her
s.Shesmi l
edunlockingherdoorthenst epped
out
.Aronawalkedov ertohercar.
“
Hey
…”
“
OhmyGod!Thanky
ou.Thanky
ousomuch.
”
“
Whathappenedt
oit
?”
“
Thet
ir
ebur
st.Iwasspeedi
ng.
”
Aronal
i
ghtedhi
sphone’
stor
cht
henl
ookedati
t.“
Do
youhaveaspar
ewheel?
”
“
Ngng.
”
“
Ok,
let
’sgo.Lockt
hedoor
s.”
CandytookherhandbagandlockedthecarasArona
gotbackinhi
scar.Shewalkedroundthecarand
openedthefrontseatdoor
.Kennyt
urnedtoher
hol
dingherphonet henshesmil
edandclosedt
he
door.Shegotinatthebackseat
.
“
HiKenny
…”
“
Hi.
”
Candyl
ookedatAr
onaagai
n.“
Thanksf
orcomi
ng.
”
“
Sur
e.”
AronajoinedtheroadasCandyleanedbackonher
seatrelaxi
ng.Hereachedf
orhisbeerthenKenny
snatcheditfr
om him andt
hrewthebottl
eout
thr
ought hewindow.
“Iam notgoi
ngtoletyoukil
lme.Istil
lhavealott
o
achi
ev ei
nmyl i
fe,
Iwil
l notbepartoftheli
stof
peopl
ewhodi ebecauseofdr unkdri
vers.
”
Hechuckl
ed.“
Iwasn’
tev
engoi
ngt
odr
ink.
”
“
Iknow,
Iwasj
ustmaki
ngsur
e.”
Afterafewsecondsofdri
vi
ng,
hel
ookedather.
“Babedoy ouknowhowmuchIboughtt
hat?You
j
ustt hr
ewawaymoney .
”
“
What
’sdonei
sdone.
”
Candysi
ghedasthecoupl
echatted.Awhil
elat
erhe
par
kedinfr
ontofhergat
e.Candysmiledst
eppi
ng
out
.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
Shewal kedtohergateasthecardrov
eof f
.Insi
de
herhouse,shesatdownconnect i
ngherphoneto
herchargerthenki
ckedoffhershoesandtookof f
herdress.Sheswitchedonherphonewhileit
chargedthencall
edherfri
endtaki
ngoffthebra.
“
Fri
end…”
“
Kebaki
le.Iam ov
eri
tnow.Nextt
imeIwon’
tev
en
l
i
stent
oy ou.
”
“
Didheev
encome?
”
“
Hedid,wi
thhi
sgi
rl
fr
iendandi
twasi
fIwasn’
t
t
her
e.”
“
Whatwashi
sgi
rl
fr
ienddoi
ngt
her
e?”
“
Shewaswi
thhermanmma.Iam soembar
rassed,
i
magi newhatIdidtomycar .Ishoul
djustaccept
gorewaai i
,hewil
lneverbemineandmov eonwith
mylife.Leenehewasj ustneverminefr
om the
beginning.Ipr
obabl
ylookedpatheti
cinhiseyes.
”
“I
fhedidn’
tfeelany
thi
ngf
ory
ouhewoul
dhav
e
probabl
ynevercome.”
“No,hecamebecausehewasretur
ningt
hefavor
,I
hel
pedhim whenheneededajobandnowhewas
j
ustbeingnice.Ihav
etopr
epar
eforworktomorr
ow.
Gosharp.”
“
Ok.
”
Candyhungupt henswi t
chedonherTVabi t
disappoi
ntedinher sel
f.Shehadbeenmaki nggood
progresst
ill
shel i
stenedtoherfri
end.Herphone
rangasshef l
ippedt hr
oughthechannelsthenshe
stoodupandwal kedtohercharger.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey,
your ef
usedwi
thy
ournumbersoIf
oundway
s
t
ogetit
.”
Candysmi
l
ed.“
Whatdoy
ouwant
?”
“
Dinner
.Let
’ssayt
omor
rowat8.Iwi
l
lpi
cky
ouup.
”
“
Ihav
emyowncar
,Idon’
tneedt
obepi
ckedup.
”
“
Ok,
wecanmeett
her
e.Youwon’
tregr
eti
t.
”
Shesmil
ed.“Ok,butonl
ybecauseIam notaf
anof
ref
usi
ngfreefood.
”
Thecal
l
erl
aughed.“
Okcool
.”
“
Bye.
”
Sheputherphonedownandsati
nfr
ontofherTV
wit
hasmi le.

*
**

Mothusisati
nthebuslat
erthateveni
ngt hinkingof
whathadhappenedattheparty
.Hewonder edif
Kennywasf i
ne,
thatguyl
ookedlikeapossi ble
contr
oll
i
ngwomanbeat er
.Apar tofhim want edto
getofft
hebusbutthetal
khehadwi t
hAr onamade
hi
m stayputonhissi
t.Hetookouthisphoneand
cal
ledSelet
so.
“
Heybabe…Iam i
nthebusnow.
”
“
Ok.IwishIcoul
dwai
tfory
ouatt
her
ank.Ir
eal
l
y
missy
ou.”
“Imissyoutoo.Iam onmyway .Iwil
lcomeandsee
youassoonasIar ri
ve,Ihopeyourmom isnotone
ofthosepeoplewhor ef
useforthebaby’
sfat
herto
seethebaby.”
Selet
solaughedsoft
ly.“No.Shewon’
tref
use.She
evenlet
’spapaplaywiththebaby.
”
“
Ok,
Iwi
l
ltal
ktoy
ouwhenIar
ri
ve.
”
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Hehungupandputhisphonei
nhispocket.Thebus
sl
owlyst
art
edmovingasaladyent
eredthensat
besi
dehi
m.
“
Dumel
ang…”
Mot
husi
lookedather
.“Dumel
ang.
”
Hel
ookedatherf
acer
ecogni
zi
nghert
hensmi
l
ed.
“
Nur
seAngel
a?”
Angl
at ur
nedtohimt
henl
aughed.“
Theguywho’
s
gi
rl
fr
iendburnthi
m?”
Hel
aughed.“
Whyar
eyouscr
eami
ng?
”
“
Uhu,
sor
ry,
Ifor
goti
t’
sasecr
et.
”
“
Howar
eyou?
”
“
Iam f
ine.Your
sel
f?St
il
lbei
ngabused?
”
Helaughedagai
nrel
axi
ngonhi
sseat
.“Shegav
e
bi
rt
h.”
“Atl
eastnomor
eoi
l
s.Whatwer
eyoudoi
ngher
ein
Gabs?”
“
Iam t
ruckdr
iver
,Ihadt
rav
ell
edt
oTanzani
a.”
“
Oh,
Ihear
dal
otofr
umor
saboutt
ruckdr
iver
s.”
Mothusismil
ed.“
Whatev
ery
ouhearddoesn’
tappl
y
t
oev er
ydriv
er.Nott
omeatleast
.Wenawhatwere
youdoingherei
nGabs?”
“
Iwasbuy
ingmy
sel
facar
.”
“
Wher
eisi
tnow?
”
“
TheoneIwant
edwasn’
tther
ebutt
heysai
ditwi
l
l
her
enextweek.
”
“
Youar
egoi
ngt
ocomebackagai
nnextweek?
”
“Yes.Ei
shwenarraIam soexci
ted.Ican’
twai
tto
seemy sel
fdr
ivi
ng.
”
“
IalsowantacarbutIhav
eot
hert
hingsIwantt
odo
f
ir
st.”
‘
Thi
ngsl
i
kewhat
?”
“
Kebat
lagony
ala.(
Iwantt
omar
ry.
)”
“
Youraggr
essi
vegi
rl
fr
iend?
”
“
Shei
snotaggr
essi
ve.Youj
ustdon’
tknowher
.”
“
Doyouevenl
oveherory
ouar
ewi
thherbecauseof
t
hechi
l
d.”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Ilov
eher
.”
“Omaaka.( Youar elyi
ng.)Buti fyoucanhandl e
tyi
ngy our
selftosomeoney oudon’ treal
l
yl ovef or
therestofyourlif
e,doit.Youwi ll
bemar r
yingf orall
thewrongr easonsthennextt hingy ouaredi vor
cing.
Youwoul dhav estri
ngedheral ongwheny oucoul d
havesetherf r
eeandl etanothermanwhor eall
y
l
oveshermar
ryher
.”
Mothusi
lookedatherf
orawhil
ethensi
ghed.“
I
wantwhat’
sbestformychi
l
d.”
“Whataboutyourhappiness?Thatchildissti
l
la
baby,heorshewil
lunder st
andashegr owsthat
daddyandmommyar enott ogether
.Iam notsaying
goandbr eakupwit
hy ourgirl
fr
iendjustthatt
ome
thi
sissueisver
ysensiti
ve.”
“
Whatdi
dtheydot
oyou?
”
Angelalookedathi mthensighed.“Hemar r
ied
someoner ightundermynoseandt heonl ythingI
wasnowwashi sbabymama.Ial wayssay ,i
fy ou
don’tlov
esomeone, j
ustsetthem freeandgot o
thosewhomakey ouhappyinsteadofst r
inging
someoneal ong.Imagine5y earsofdatingonl yfor
himt omarrysomeoneel se.Ifoundoutmont hs
after
.”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
It
’sok,
Iam j
ustsay
ing,i
fyouknowyoudon’
tlov
e
t
hatwomanthewayamanshoul dlov
ehiswoman,
whybot
her
?Whybot herhur
ti
ngherbyst
ayi
ngwith
herwhenyouknowyoucan’
tlov
ehert
hewayshe
deser
vest
obel ov
ed?”
Helookedatherandsmil
ed.“
Leavingherwouldhurt
hermorethanmestayi
ngevenifIdon’
tloveherthe
waysheneedstobeloved.
”
“Atleastwhenyoul
eaveher,
shewil
lcrybut
eventuall
ymoveon,youar
ebeingunf
aironher
.”
“Whatar ey
oul i
steni
ngto?”Hepickedher
earphonesandpluggedonet hennodded.Angel
a
pickedtheotherandtheybothli
stenedwhil
ethebus
mov ed.

*
**

Thefol
l
owingmorni
ng,Kenny
’sal
armrangasArona
ki
ssedherfi
l
li
ngherpussy
.Kennyr
eachedf
ori
tand
st
oppedit
.
“
Youneedt
obat
h.”
“
Whatt
imei
syourl
esson?
”
“
At11.
”
Hegotoffbedthenwal
kedtot
hebat
hroom but
t
nakedwhil
eKennystar
edatdi
ck.
“
Babe,
Ihear
dpeopl
eenl
arget
hei
rdi
cks,
didy
oudo
t
hat
?”
Hegav
eheral
ookmaki
ngherl
augh.“
Otl
aswaba.
”
Hewal kedinsi
dethebathroom andtookashower
whileshemadeherbedandmadehi m br
eakfast
dressedinhernight
dress.Herphonevibr
atedfrom
thebedt hensheputthefooddownandr eachedfor
i
t.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Himybaby
.”
“
Mama?
”
“
Yes.Howi
sschool
?”
Sur
pri
sed,
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
School
isf
ine.
”
“
Andy
ou?Kanat
heci
tycanbedecei
vi
ng.
”
“
Iam good.
”
“
That’
smygi
rl
.Kenei
l
we,
nkadi
meP1000,
Iwi
l
l
r
etur
nit.
”
“
P1000?
”
“Eh,
borrowmeP1000mychi
l
d,Ihav
ean
emergency
.”
“
Ok.Iwi
l
lewal
l
eti
t.
”
“Thankyoumybaby
.Justsendt
hemoneyt
hrough
ewall
etok?”
“
Ok.Iam sor
ryIcoul
dn’
tcomet
othef
uner
al.
”
“
It
’sok,
Iunder
standy
ouwer
ebusyatschool
.”
“
Yes.Howi
sMi
a?”
“Shei
sfi
ne.Justsendt
hemoneyt
hroughewal
l
et
ok?”
“
Yes.
”
ShehungupasAr
onast
art
eddr
essi
ng.
“
Wast
haty
ourmom?
”
“
Yes.Shei
sbor
rowi
ngsomemoney
.”
Ar
onapausedandl
ookedather
.“Howmuch?
”
“
P1000.
”
“
P1000?
”
“
Yes,
Iam sendi
ngi
t.
”
“
That
’sal
otofmoney
.”
“Shehasanemergency
.Sheisfi
nal
lycomi
ngar
ound.
Sheevenaskedaboutmyschool
.”
“Becauseshewant smoney .Ofcauseshewi l
lmake
i
tseem asi fshecares,thatwomandoesn’ tcare
aboutyou.Ifyoustartgivi
nghermoneyt henshewi l
l
neverstopaskingforitbecausey ouwil
lal
way sgiv
e
i
ttoher .Al
lshehast odoi scooksomesobst or
y.”
Tearsf
il
ledKenny’
seyes.“
May besheischangi
ng.
Youdon’tknowhowlongIhaveprayingf
orherto
tal
ktomel ovi
ngl
yli
keshedid,canyouatleast
pret
endtobehappyforme? ”
Heki
ssedher
.“Ij
ustwantyoutobecaref
ulbuti
f
youf
eelshei
sbeinggenui
nethenok.
”
“
Imadebr
eakf
ast
.Dr
ess.
”
Shetookhispl
ateandputi
tonherstudyi
ngtabl
e
whil
edoinganewall
ettohermot
her.Aronaatet
hen
grabbedhi
scarkey
sandphone,sheescor
tedhi
m
outsi
de.Heki
ssedherst
andi
ngbyhiscar.
“
Iwi
l
lcal
lyou.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Pleaser
eadt
hatdr
ivi
ngbook.
”
“
Ok.
”
Nametsowalkedovert
hensmi
l
edpol
i
tel
yatAr
ona
bef
oretur
ningtoKenny.
“
HiKenny
,canwet
alk?
”
Ronaki
ssedKennyonel
astt
imeandgoti
nhi
scar
whil
eNametsosmil
ed.
“Hey,canyoubor
rowmeP1Of ort
ranspor
t,Iwil
l
ret
urnitassoonasIgetmyal
l
owance.IthoughtI
sti
ll
hadsomemoney .”
“
Ok.
”
Shewal
kedbackinsi
det
hehouset
hencameback
wit
hP20.“
Takethis.
”
“Thanks,
IhopeIdon’
tar
ri
vel
atef
ort
he
submissi
on.
”
“
Whatt
imear
eyousupposedt
ohandi
tov
er?
”
“
Int
went
ymi
nut
es.
”
“I
fyouwai
tfort
hecombi
youwon’tar
ri
veont
ime.
LetmeaskRonatodr
opyouof
f.
”
“
Thanky
ou,
thatwi
l
lbehel
pful
.”
Kennywalkedtocar.“
Babe,
canyoudropoffmy
fr
iendatschool
,shehastosubmi
therassi
gnment
quickl
y.
”
“
Shecanj
umpi
n.”
Kennyl
ookedatNamet
so.“
Geti
n.”
Namet sosmil
edt hengotinatthefr
ontashershor
t
skir
troll
edoverexposingherthi
ghs.Ar
onastart
ed
thecarandreversedthendroveoffwhi
leKenny
walkedbackinsi
deherhouse.
.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#24

Aronaparkedatt
heschoolgat
ethenNamet
so
smileddr
oppingsomet
hingint
hecar'
ssi
depocket
s.
“
Thanky
ousomuch.
”
“
It
’ok.
”
Shesteppedoutthenwat chedasthecardrov
eoff
.
Hehadn’tsai
dasi nglewordthewholejour
ney
neit
herhadheevenl ookedherdir
ecti
on.Shewal
ked
i
nsidetheschool
pr emisespull
i
ngdownhershort
dress.

*
**

Tshenol
oleanedbackont
hewal
lsi
tt
ingont
hebed
l
aughingonherphone.
“
Iwasactual
l
ysurprisedtheti
meyoutol
dmethat
Mot
husiwasfight
ing,Idon’
tknowhi
m asaf
ight
er.
”
“
Hei
snot
,hewassoscar
edTshenol
o.”
“Hehadever
yrightt
obe,
Aronadoesl
ookabi
tscar
y.
Sohowdiditend?”
“
Iwassoscar
edbutwear
egoodnow.
”
“
Iam sur
efr
om t
her
ehewi
l
lnev
ert
alkt
oyouagai
n.”
“
Hesai
dhegotaj
obasat
ruckdr
iver
.”
“
Wow…”
“
Yes,
howar
eyou?
”
Tshenol
osi ghed.“
WeareinMaun.Somepast ori
s
comingtonight.Mamabeli
evesThabo’
swife
bewit
chedme.Iam start
ingtobeli
eveher
.Thisis
notnormal.Iam al
waysi
npai n.
”
“Ihopethepastorsendsitbacktot hesender
.Idon’
t
underst
andhowy oupunishanotherwomanal l
becauseyourhusbandcan’ tkeepitinhi
spants.
Personal
lyIwil
lnev erst
aywithacheat i
ngman.If
youcheat,Il
eavey ou.Iwil
lnotatt
ackanother
woman. ”
“
Ilef
tmypantyatherhouse.Ther
edoneIwas
weari
ngt
hatdaythatshecaughtmei
nthe
war
drobe.
”
“
Yout
hinksheusedi
t?”
“Yes.ButIhav
efai
th.Ir
eal
l
ycan’
twai
tformy
breakt
hrough.
”
“
Iwi
l
lbepr
ayi
ngf
ory
ou.
”
“
Tebat
soi
sdri
vingher
e,hesay
shewant
stobe
t
her
ewhenIgetheal
ed.”
“
Ireal
l
yli
ket
hisTebat
sohuman.
”
“Ili
kehimt
oommabutmysi cknesshasbeen
blocki
ngever
ythi
ng.Hopefull
ywhenIgetbackon
myf eet
,wecanstartsomethingtoget
her
.”
“
Hei
snotmar
ri
edaker
e?”
“
No,
thi
sti
mear
oundIdi
dmyr
esear
ch.
”
Kennyl
aughed.“
OkNol
o,ei
sh,
letmepr
epar
efor
school
.”
“
Ok.
”
Shehungupt henTshenol
o’smot
herwal
kedi
nthe
room hol
dingfood.
“
Igoty
ouf
ood.Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?
”
“
Thepai
nisbet
ter
.”
“
Iwi
shi
tcanbeev
eni
ngal
ready
.”
Tshenol
olaughed.“
Met
oo.
”

*
**

Moesil
ookedatMaatl
asmar
tl
ydr
essedi
nhi
s
uni
for
mt hensmi
led.
“Babeweh,
doy
out
hinkRonai
sser
iousabout
Kenny?
”
Maatlashrugged.“Honest
lyIdon’
tknow.Hopeful
ly
heis.Thatgirl
isperf
ectforhi
m.Shemi ghtbeyoung
butsheisrightf
ulf
orhim.Allhehastodoisgiveita
chancewithoutbri
ngingLesangtothepict
ure.
”
“
That
’smypoi
nt,
heal
way
sgoesback.
”
“
Ihopenott
hist
imearound,
ifhedoesthenIwil
l
washmyhandsoffhi
m.Iwil
lnotwastemytime
wi
thsomeonewhokeepsmakingthesamemi st
ake
ov
erandov
eragai
n.”
Maat
laki
ssedMoesi
.“Il
ovey
ou,
Iwi
l
lseey
oul
ater
.”
“
Ok.
”
Hewal
kedoutandgoti
nhi
scardi
ali
ngAr
ona.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,Iwant
edt
osayt
hanky
ou.
”
“
It
’sok,
thoughAt
sil
edi
dthemost
.”
“Iwassurpr
isedt
her
ewer
enost
ri
pper
s.I
t’
susual
l
y
hisst
yle.
”
“Iwasn’
tgoingtol
etthesamemi
staket
hat
happenedlastt
imerepeat
.”
“Ibumpedint
oLesangy
est
erday
.Ireal
l
yhopey
ou
arenevergoi
ngt
ogobacktoher.
”
“
Thatwi
l
lnev
erhappen.Il
oveKenny
.”
“Il
i
kehertoo.Shei
scal
m,downt
oear
thand
beaut
if
ul.
”
“
Youdon’
thav
etowor
ryaboutmegoi
ngback.
”
“
Ok,
Iwasj
ustmaki
ngsur
e.”
“
It
’sal
lgood.
”

*
**

Mothusi l
ookedathi
scarthensmiledstari
ngatthe
i
nter
ior.Hejumpedinwithahugesmi leandstar
ted
t
heengi ne.Unabl
etocontainhi
sexcit
ement ,
he
t
ookouthi sphoneandcalledAngela.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Iboughtmy
sel
facar
.”
“
Youwhat
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Youshoul
dcomeandt
akemef
orat
estdr
ive.
”
“
Shoul
dIcomenow?
”
Angel
agi
ggl
edexci
tedl
y.“
Yes.
”
“
OkIam comi
ng.Sendmedi
rect
ionst
oyourhouse.
”
“
Ok.
”
Mot
husi
hungupasSel
etsocal
l
edt
henhepi
cked.
“
Hey
,ar
eyouony
ourway
?”
“No,Iam athome.Iwi
l
lcomel
ater
,letmet
akea
baththengotothebar
ber.
”
“
Ok.Isenty
oual
i
stoft
hingst
obr
ing.
.”
“
Iwi
l
lbuyt
hem.
”
“
Ok.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Met
oo.
”
Hehungupthenreadt
hedi
rect
ionsf
rom Angel
a
bef
oredr
ivi
ngoff
.

AtAngel
a’
shouse,
Angel
agoti
nsi
det
hewhi
tegol
f
smil
i
ng.
“
Wow!
”
“
Whatdoy
out
hink?
”
“
It
’sbeaut
if
ul.Youar
emaki
ngmej
eal
ous.
”
“
Aker
ewenay
ouar
ebuy
ingy
ourownnextweek.
”
Shelaughed.“
Yaanongwagonyal
akaeng?(
What
arey
ougoi ngtomarrywi
th?
)”
“Youwereri
ght.Iam goi
ngtof
indawaytoendthe
rel
ati
onshi
ppeaceful
lyandcal
mly.Ial
sowantt
o
exper
iencereal
love.
”
Shesmi ledt
henher ever
sedanddroveof
fwhil
eshe
putonherseat bel
t.Hedrov
ehertothemall
where
theysteppedoutofthecarandwalkedi
nthemall
l
aughingholdinghands.

*
**

From adi
stance,
Lol
olookedatMot
husi
thenqui
ckl
y
call
edSel
etso.
“
Lol
o…”
“
IjustsawMot husiwi
thawomanandt heyseem
waytooclose.Theyar
eevenhol
dinghands.
”
“
Mot
husi
?”
“
Yes.It
hinkhei
scheat
ing.
”
“Cany
oustopi
t?Mot
husij
ustar
ri
vedf
rom
Gabor
oneandhei
sathome.”
“
Sel
etsoyourboy
fri
endiswi
thanot
herwomanand
t
heyseem waycl
ose.”
“Youknowwhat ,Iam ti
redofhear
ingt
his.Ihave
hadenoughoft hi
s.Ithi
nkit’
sti
meweof fi
cial
lyst
op
thi
sfakefr
iendship.
”
“Sel
etso,
Ijustsawy ourman, Iam notmakingthi
s
up.Iam t
ryingtohelpyou.KanaIam st ar
ingathi
m
thi
smoment .Theyarel
aughingholdinghands.
”
“Iam hangi
ngup.Let’
skeepourrelati
onship
prof
essionalf
rom her
eaft
er.I
fyouhav enot hi
ngto
saywhichdoesn’ti
nvol
vework,don’tsayitall
.”
Selet
sohungupthenLol
olookedatherphonei
n
shockanddisbel
i
ef.

*
**

Lat
erthatday,Kennygotinsi
deAr
ona’
scart
hen
l
eanedov erandkissedhi
m.
“
Didy
our
eadt
hebook?
”
Kennysmi
lednoddi
ng.“
Iread.Iwi
l
lwr
it
ethet
estas
soonasIf
ini
shwithi
t.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hedroveoffheadedtohi
shouse.Kennyt
ookoffher
shoesandstret
chedherl
egs,
herphonevi
brat
ed
thensheopenedNametso’
swhatsappmessage.
Nametso:Hey ,
Ithi
nkImighthav
edr oppedmygr een
hi
ghli
ghterinyourboyf
ri
end’
scar.Can’tf
indi
t
anywher
e, canyoucheckmaybeinthesidepockets
i
nhiscar?
Kennyputherhandsi
nsidethecardoorpocket
s
thenf
eltsomethi
ngsli
my ,
sheslowlypi
ckeditup
thenl
ookedattheusedcondom withsemeninsi
de.
“
Ronawhat
’st
his?
”
Aronat
urnedtoherandlookedatt
hecondom wi
tha
fr
own.“Wheredi
dy ougetthat
?”
“
Igoti
nher
e.What
’st
his?
”
“
Idon’
tknow.
”
Kenny
’sheartpounded.“
Youcan’tt
ell
mey oudon’
t
knowwhatthisis,
akerei
t’
sinyourcar!
”Sheangr
il
y
l
ookedathi
m.“
What
’st
his?
”
“
It
’snotmi
ne.
”
Kenny’
snosef l
aredasangert
ookov
er.“
Obatlago
nti
rasematlaAr ona?Whatdoyoumeanyoudidn’
t
putitt
here?Ifyoudidn’
tthenwhodi
d?Whoelse
usesthi
scari fnotyou?”
“
Babecomeon,
Idi
dn’
tputi
tther
e.”
“
Theni
tmagi
cal
l
ygother
e?”
Hedroveint
ohisyar
dthenparkedthecarstari
ngat
thecondom.“Noonehasbeeninthiscarexpectme
andyou.Idon’
tuseacondom wit
hy ousoIdon’t
know.”
Tear
sfi
l
ledKenny
’sey
esasherl
i
pst
rembl
ed.
“Iam notcheating,
Iknowhowi tfeelstobecheat ed
onandIwoul dn’
twantt omakeany onef eelt
hat.I
don’tevenhav eareasont ocheatbecauseIl oveyou.
Iam transparentwit
hy ouineverythingIdobecause
Ican’timaginemylifewithoutyou.Besi desmeand
you,noonehasbeeni nt hi
scarexpecty ourfri
end
whowassi t
tingonthatv er
ysamesi t.I
t’
sei t
herIam
atwor korIam withyou,
Idon’ tev
enhavet i
met o
cheatneitherdoIevenwantt ocheat
.Iam content
withy ou.
”Hehandedherhi sphone.“
Got hroughit
.I
woul dn’
thavedelet
edanythingsoevery
thingis
there.”
Tear
srol
leddownKenny’
scheeksasshelookedat
hi
m.Shecouldfeel
herhear
tbreaki
ngaspainsl
iced
heri
ntot
wohalves.
Herv oi
ceshookasshespoke.“ Sothiscondom
broughtit
sel
finhereRona?Isthatwhaty ouare
saying?Youwantmet obeli
evet hat
?Thecondom
broughtit
sel
finsi
dehereandjustplaceditsel
f.
”
“BabeIdon’tknowhowitgotthere.I
t’
snotmi
ne.I
am notcheati
ng.You’
vegottotrustme.”
“
Pleasetakemet omyhouse.Iam notgoingtostay
i
nar el
ationshi
pwhereIam notdeser
ved.It
oldyouI
wouldleaveifyoucheat
,maybeyouthoughtIwas
j
okingbutIam goingtoshowyouhowser i
ousI
was.”
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#25

Ar
onal
ookedatherandsi
ghed.
“
Whenwoul
dIhav
echeat
ed?
”
“
Idon’
tknowbutt
hiscondom di
dn’
tbr
ingi
tsel
f
i
nsi
dethi
scar
.”
“Idon’
tknowhowi
tgott
her
ebutIswear
,Iam not
cheati
ng.
”
“
Arey
ouser
iousl
yexpect
ingmet
obel
i
evet
hat
?
“Whatdoyouwantmet
osaybabe?Iam not
cheat
ing.
”
“Youarejustli
ketherestofthem.Thel
easty
oucan
doisownupt oyouracti
onslikeamanoryouareal
l
taughthowtol i
e?Ishouldhaveknownyouweretoo
goodt obetrue.
”
Ar
onal
ookedathert
henst
eppedoutoft
hecar
.
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?Isai
dtakemehome.
”
Het
hrewt
hecarey
esather
.“Dr
ivey
our
sel
f.
”
Hewal kedinsi
dehishousewhi l
eshest aredathim,
herangerrisi
ng.Itwasthefactthathekeptdeny i
ng
whatwasr ightinfr
ontofherthatpissedheroff.She
steppedoutandf ol
lowedafterhim.Shewal ked
i
nsidethebedr oom wherehewast akingoffhisti
e
andshirt.
“
Soy
ouar
enotgoi
ngt
oexpl
ainy
our
sel
f?”
“
Whatam Iexpl
aini
ngmy
sel
fforwheny
ouwon’
t
l
i
stent
ome? ”
Atearr
oll
eddownhercheek.“
Youcan’
tcheatonme
anddenyi
twhenIhavecaughtyou.
”
Het
ookof
fhi
sbel
tunzi
ppi
nghi
spant
s.
“Youdi
sgustme.Omatakal
aamonnaandnowIsee
whyLesangwouldl
eav
ey ouforabet
terman!Who
cheat
sinthecar
?”
Hesatdownonhi
sbedt
hent
ookof
fhi
sshoes.
“Iam endi
ngthi
sfakerelat
ionshi
p,y
oushouldhave
beengladIevendatedyousinceyoucan’
thandl
e
youragematesandt heonlythi
ngyouknowistopry
af
tery
oungst
ers.Somet
hingi
swr
ongwi
thy
ou.
”
“
Kennyy
ouwi
l
lsoonpi
ssmeof
f,shutup.
”
“Orwhat?IfyouputyourhandsonmeIam r eport
ing
youtothepolice,
hopefull
ythi
stimearoundt
hey
l
ocky ouup!Imadeami st
ake,Ishoul
dhavechosen
King.
”
Hegotup.“
Stopit
.Getoutofmyhouse,
didn’
tyou
sayy
ouareleavi
ng?”
“
Youar
eawhor
e.”
“
Ok,
nowl
eav
e.”
“Soy ousleptwi
thsomeonei
nsi
dey
ourcar
?Youar
e
disgusti
ng.”
“Getoutofmyhouse.Iam donet
alki
ngt
oyou.
Leave.
”
Shelookedathi m cr
ying,i
tdidn’
tevenlookli
kehe
caredanymore.Het ookof fhi
spantsthenputon
sweatpant
sbef orewal ki
ngoutandsitt
inginfrontof
hi
sTV.Shewal kedoutoft hehousethenpickeda
bri
ckandstartedsmashi nghiscarwindows.
Hewal
kedoutandl
ookedather
.“Whatar
eyou
doi
ng?
”
“
Youthi
nky
oucanj
ustcheatonmeandgetaway
wi
thi
t?”
Shesmashedthewi
ndowagain.Hepul
l
edherfrom
hi
scart
hendragedherbacki
nsidet
hehouse.
“Whatdoy
out
hinky
ouar
edoi
ng?Ot
lany
ela
Kenny.
”
“Fuckyou!Youar
eanexcuseofaman.Yourmot
her
shouldhaveabor
tedy
ou.”
“
Sayt
hatagai
n.”
“
Fucky
ou!
”
Aronapull
edherwi thherhairandkissedherr oughly
thatKennytestedbl oodinhermouthasherhear t
raced.Hetookof fherdressandbr athent wistedher
nippl
essohar dthatshey elpedinpainmi xed.From
thewayhewasbr eathi
ngshecouldt ell
itwasn’ t
goingtobetheki ndofsext heyusuallyhad.
Het ookouthi
sharddickt
henturnedherar
oundto
touchthecouchpul
li
ngherpanti
estothesideand
#remov ed.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#25
#r
emov
ed

Het ookouthishar
ddi ckthenturnedherar
oundto
touchthecouchpulli
ngherpant i
est ot
hesideand
pushedthroughherflaps.Kennyfli
nchedtr
yingt
o
getupbutAr onaspankedherbut t.
“
Awww…”
“
Ify
ouraisethatheadonemor
eti
me,
Iam goi
ngt
o
f
uckyourass.”
Kennyt earful
lythoughtofherassthenputbackher
headont hecouchast hatdi
ckpai
nfull
ysli
din
str
etchinghi swayi n.Heputhishandsonherwai st
andpushedi ntil
lhebur i
edtothehi
lt
.Itfel
tasifhi
s
di
ckhadgr ownev enmor eormaybeitwasthe
posit
ion,shehat edt hi
sposit
ionbutsheremained
sti
l
ltakingitlikeabi ggirl
.
Hest
artedthr
usti
ngint
oherwit
hdeepfastst
rokes
gr
unt
ing.Kennycl
osedherey
eswishi
ngshecould
j
ustgetawayf r
om hi
m.Shecouldn’tbeli
evehewas
doingthi
stoherev enthoughhewascheat i
ngonher.
Tearsfil
l
edherey es,
justthet
houghtofhim doi
ng
thesamet hinghedidtohertoanotherwoman
brokeherheart.Pai
ncloggedherthroatasshe
wonderedwhatshewasdoi ngwrong,shealways
dideveryt
hinghewant ed.
Dicktappedal lcor
ner
sdeepi nhert hatshemoaned
asherpussygotwet t
er,
pleasur
ebui l
dingitselfdeep
i
nher.Hesl idoutandlayheront hef l
ooronher
backandsl idintwofi
ngersinherpussyt appingher
upperplates,hismouthonherclit.Sheclosedher
eyesmoani ngashecont i
nuslytappedherg- spot.
“
Mmmmmmm Ronaaa…”
Pleasureweakenedherasshegotcloser
,shecoul
d
feelheror
gasm approached.Shet
hrewherhead
backspasmingasherl egsshook.
“
Awwwww….Mhmmmmm…”
Hesl
i
douthi
sfi
nger
sthengotup.
“
Kneel
.”
Withherl
egsshaking,
sheknel
tthenhesl
idhi
sdi
ck
i
nhermout ht
hatherstomachcontent
sli
ft
edwhi
l
e
shepushedhi
sthighsback.
“
Osekawant
swar
a,puty
ourhandsbehi
ndy
ou.
”
Kennyputherhandsbehi ndherthenhest ar
ted
thrusti
nghisdickinhermout htappinghert hroat.
Kennygaggedunabl et obreathefeeli
nglikeshewas
aboutt ovomit.Heheldherweav est ari
ngather
fuckingherli
tt
lemout h.Tearsfel
lfrom thecor ners
ofherey esasherjawsgott ir
ed,hert eet
hsinkingon
hisdick.Hesli
doutt henslappedhercheekswi t
hit.
Shebl i
nkedcryingbreathi
ngheav i
ly.
“Whatar
ey oudoi
ng?Doi
tagai
nandIam goi
ngt
o
sl
apyou.”
Sheopenedhermout hthenhepusheditalli
nher
mout handfuckedherhar
d.Justst
aringatherl
itt
le
mout hfil
l
edwithhisdi
cktur
nedhim on,he
repeatedl
ythr
ustinasherwarmthgithi
m grunt
ing.
“
Fuck!
”
Hesl
idi
nmor eofthatlengt
handwat chedasshe
wi
denedhereyesstar
ingathim st
ruggli
ngto
breat he.Vomi tmadei t’
swayuphert hroat,
she
pushedhi m backv omi t
ingonthefloor.Shegasped
thenhepul ledherupwi t
hherweav eandwentwi th
hert ot hebathroom.Kennybendedov erthesink
washi nghermout ht henAronasqueezedhi mself
from behi nd.Kennyputherhandsont hemi r
ror
staringathi m ashecompl el
etl
yblockedherpat h.
Standi ngtoowasj ustneverthebestopt i
on,hefelt
ev endeeperl ikethisandherpussyf eltasifitwas
cracki ng.
Hepull
edherhai
rthenwhi
speredi
nherear
.“O
ntwaet
swakengKenny?DoIlookl
ikey
our
agemate?
”
Tear
srandownhercheeks.“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Ismymot
hery
ourf
ri
end?
”
“
Ngng…”
Hespreadherbuttcheekscur
vinghisbackand
l
etti
ngthebeasti
nhimt akecontr
ol,
Kennyclosed
hereyesst
andingonhertoesasherpoorpussy
facedit
.
“
Wat
chy
our
sel
fasIf
ucky
ou.
”
Sheopenedherey esandlookedather sel
fashe
devouredher .Shemoanedsof t
lysqueezingher
breast.Theybodi esslappedagainstoneanotheras
hedr i
l
ledherwi thoutanyinter
rupti
ons.Shelooked
athimt hroughthemi rrorashewenthar derdi
gging
deeperanddeeperwi thouthol
dingback.
Thepl easurethi
sdickwasnowdishi
ngwas
unexplainableandknowi
nganotherwomanhad
receiv
edi t…sherel
axedherbodypushi
ngherbut
t
againsthim.
Aronapul ledhertothebedwher ehel ayherdown
thengotbet weenherl egspushi nghimsel finsideher.
Herst omachl i
ftedashebegunmov i
nghi swai st.
Kennymoanedst ar
ingathim, shel ovedhi m so
mucht hatshewasn’ teventhinkingofleav ing,
may bemont hsbackshewoul dhav eleftwi thout
hesitati
onbutnowi twasasi fshecoul dnlti magine
herli
f ewithouthim.Heputonel egonhi sshoul der
thenwat chedhimsel fdipi
nandoutofher .Her
breastbounced, Aronachokedherwhi l
ef uckingher
hard, Kennygaspedt ryi
ngtobr eatheast hatdi ck
poundedi ntohersomuchshecoul dswearhej ust
wantedt okil
lher
.Sher ol
ledhereyestotheback
withherhandsonhi sasheror gasm t
hrashedher
repeatedl
y.Aronaletgoofherneckf r
eezingi
nside
herandf i
ll
edthatpussy.Heslidoutofherpussyas
herstomachdef l
atedthenhelookedatherwhi l
eher
pussyt hr
obbedpainful
ly.
.
.
.
Aronachokedherwhi l
ef uckingherhar d,Kenny
gaspedt r
yingtobr eatheast hatdickpoundedi nt
o
hersomuchshecoul dswearhej ustwant edtokil
l
her.Sherolledherey est othebackwi t
hherhands
onhi sasheror gasm t hrashedherr epeatedly
.Arona
l
etgoofherneckf reezinginsideherandf i
ll
edthat
pussy .Heslidoutofherpussyasherst omach
deflatedt
henhel ookedatherwhi leherpussy
thr
obbedpai nf
ull
y .
“Idi
dn’tputthatcondom t
here,youdidn’
tputi
tther
e,
youandIar etheonlypeopl
ewhohav ebeeninthat
carthenalsoy ourf
ri
end.I
fIdidn’tputt
hecondom
ther
e,andy
oudidn’
ttheni
tleav
esoneperson.I
don’
twantyout
alki
ngtothatgi
rlany
moreyouhear
me?”
Shel
ookedathi
m andnoddedwi
tht
ear
sinherey
es.
“
Whyar
eyoucr
ying?
”
Sheshookherheadbli
nkingawayhert
ear
sthen
for
cedasmile.“
Iam notcryi
ng.
”
“Nextt
imeompuisay al
oIwill
makesur eyouget
att
endedbyagynaecologi
stkegoruti
lemolao.Iam
yourboyf
ri
endnotoneofyourli
tt
lefr
iends,r
espect
me.”
“
Itwon’
thappenagai
n.Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Ntebe.(
Lookatme.
)”
Shelookedathim andbl
inkedinnocentl
y.“Iam sor
ry
babe,i
twon’thappenagain.Iwil
lneverdisr
espect
youagainorputyourmotherinourargument s.
”A
tearr
andownt henshequicklyrubbeditoff
.
Helookedatherandsighedfeeli
ngabitgui
lt
ybut
thensheneededthatt
oknowt hedi
ff
erence
betweenhi
m andherfriends.
“
Arey
ouhungr
y?”
Shel
ookedathi
mthennodded.“
Yes.
”
“
Whatdoy
ouwantt
oeat
?”
“
Youcangetany
thi
ng.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hegotof
fherasshecoveredhersel
fwit
htheduv
et
t
henheputonhiscl
othesandkissedher
.
“
Iwi
l
lbebackj
ustnow.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
.”
Hewalkedoutoft hehousethenthoughtf
ull
ylooked
backatthedoor.Hewalkedbackandl ockedher
i
nsideanddroveof fwi
ththekeys.
Kennywai t
edtil
lsheheardthecardr i
vi
ngof fthen
sheputherhandscryi
ng.Ev erythi
ngwaspai nful
i
ncludi
ngherneckandt hr
oat.Shegotof fbedand
walkedtothesit
ti
ngroom wher ehervomi twas.She
putonherdressthentr
iedopeni ngthemai ndoor
holdi
nghershoesbutitwasl ocked.Tearsfil
l
edher
eyes,f
oramomentshest oodtherejustcryi
ng
si
lentl
yknowingverywell
therewasnoescape.She
fi
nall
ywalkedbacktothebedr
oom andchangedi
nto
oneofhist-shi
rt
sthenst
art
edcleani
ngwhil
eher
pussythr
obbed.
Shelookedatherphoner
ingi
ngf
rom t
hecoucht
hen
pi
cked.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,di
dyouf
indt
hehi
ghl
i
ght
er?
”
“
No.Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Yousoundl
ow,
arey
ouok?
”
“
Yes.Iam f
ine.By
e.”
“Hey
..y
ouknowIam her eforyouri
ght
?Idon’thav
e
muchtoofferyou,
justf
ri
endshipandsuppor
t.You
aret
hefir
stfri
endIhaveeverhad.
”
Kennyli
stenedt
ohert
alki
ngf
ail
i
ngtoi
magineher
putt
ingt
hecondom i
nthecar
.Shewasj
ustso
sweetandquiet
.
“
Iknow.Wewi
l
ltal
k.”
“
Ok.
”
Kennyhungupt
hensi
ghedcont
inui
ngcl
eani
ng.
Somet
hinghadt
obewr
ongt
ohav
ebot
hmencheat
onher
.

*
**

Nametsolookedatherphonef oramoment ,she

knewKennyhadobv i
ouslyseent hecondom and
maybeshewasal r
eadyfighti
ngwi t
hherboyfri
end.
Shesatdownonhermat tressfeeli
ngguil
tyt
henher
phonerang.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Name…weareatMmaSego’shouse.Mamagot
sickshewast
akent
othehospi
tal
.”
Namet
so’
shear
tski
pped.“
Issheok?
”
“
Idon’
tknow.Iam scar
ed.Raywal
ela.Mamawasn’
t
waki
ngup.”
Tear
sf i
l
ledName’seyesashest
oodup.“
Wher
eis
he?Staywit
hhim ok?
”
“
Pleasecomebackhome.Wehav
en’
tbeeneat
ing
andwear
ehungr
y.”
Nametsoputherhandoverhermout
hconceai
ngher
cr
ies.“
Iam coming.
.Don’
tcry.
”
“
Ok.Pl
easebr
ingf
ood.Rayi
sreal
l
yhungr
y.”
“Iam coming.Al
l
owancer
epor
tedsoIam goi
ngt
o
cashitandcomehome.”
“
Ok.
”
Thecall
cut
,Namet
sogotupandst
art
edpacki
ng
herbag.

*
**

AtKenny’shouse,Aronaparkedi
nfrontofthefi
rst
apartmentthensteppedoutandknockedont he
door.Namet soopenedthedoor,
shesteppedback
surpri
sedtoseeAr ona.
“
Uhhhi
…”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
CanIcomei
n?”
“
Yes.Sur
e.”
Sheopenedthedoorwiderforhi
m.Ar oanwal
kedin
thenshecl
osedthedoorbehindhim whil
eNametso
facedhi
m sni
ff
ingwit
hr eddi
sheyes.
“
Wher
eisy
ourr
oommat
e?”
“
Oh,
shewentout
.”
“
Soy
ouar
eal
lal
onet
oni
ght
?”
“
Yes.
”
Helookedather .“
Iam goi
ngtoaskyousomet
hing,
i
fyoulietomeIam goi ngtosl
apyou.I
fyou
cont
inuoslykeeplyi
ngtome,Iam goi
ngtomake
youregreti
t.Areweclear?
”
Namet
soswal
l
owedst
ari
ngathi
m,f
earcr
eepi
ngi
n.
“
Ok.
”
“
Whydi
dyoul
eav
ethatcondom i
nsi
demycar
?”
Namet
so’
shear
tski
ppedasshel
ookedathi
m.
“
Rra?
”
“
Youhear
dme.
”
“
Idon’
tknowwhaty ouar
etal
ki
ngabout
…Idi
dn’
t
l
eaveacondom i
n-“
Aronaslappedherwi t
hthebackofhishand,
Nametsof ellasherwholecheekbur
ntwhil
eherear
temporarylostheari
ng.
“
Whydi
dyoul
eav
ethatcondom i
nsi
demycar
?”
Shest
art
edcr
ying.“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Whatar
eyousor
ryf
or?
”
“
Iam sor
ryIputt
hecondom i
nthecar
.”
“
Whydi
dyoudoi
t?”
Shelookedathim cryi
ng.“I…Iwant edtoliv
ethel
if
e
Kennyliv
es.Iam str
ugglingtomakeendsmeet ,I
knowy oudoalmostev eryt
hingforher,shetol
dme.I
j
ustwantt obeabletoassistmymot herandmy
si
bli
ngs.Iwasjealous.Iam sorr
y .Iwil
lstayaway
fr
om youandKenny .”
“
What
’swr
ongwi
thy
ourmot
herandsi
bli
ngs?
”
“Mamai sparal
yzed,mysisterandbr
otherhaveto
takecareofher,t
heycan’tl
eaveheral
one.They
don’thavemoney,ifIdon’
tsendmoneyt heyhav
et o
gotopeople’shousesbegging.Iam sor r
yifIcaused
anyfi
ghtsbetweeny ouandKenny .Ihavealr
eady
deci
dedtoleaveschool andgobackhome.I t’
s
usel
essbeingherewhi l
emymot herisinhospital
andmysi bl
ingsarejuststar
ving.Iwillt
ell
Kennythe
wholetr
uth.
”
“
Howol
disy
oursi
ster
?”
“
Shei
s13.Mybr
otheri
s5.
”
“
Cal
lKennyandt
ell
hert
het
rut
h.”
“
Idon’
thav
eai
rt
ime,
Iwi
l
ltel
lherov
erwhat
sapp.
”
“Ngng,
Iwanty
out
ocal
lher
.Iwi
l
ltr
ansf
ert
he
air
ti
me.
Hetransfer
redai
rt
imetoherthenshecal
l
edKenny
put
ti
ngt hephoneonloudspeaker
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
HeyKenny,Iam t
heonewhoputt
heusedcondom
i
nyourbi
yfr
iend’
scar
.”
“
What
?”
“
Iputt
hecondom i
nhi
scarbecauseIwant
edy
ou
twotobreakupthenIcanreplaceyouandenj
oyt
he
nicet
hingshedoesforyou.Iam sorr
y.”
“
Yousnake!
”
“
Iam sor
ry.By
e.”
Shehungupst
ari
ngathi
m.“
Done.
”
“Del
etehernumberandnev
ercal
lherort
alkt
oher
agai
n.”
Namestodelet
edthenumberthenlookedathim.“
I
am avi
rgi
n,Ihavenev
erhadsexbef or
e.Ineedsome
money,Iwi
llgi
veyoumyvir
ginit
yifyoucangiveme
P500.
”
“
What
?”
Namet
sot
ookof
fal
lhercl
othesr
emai
ningnude.
“Youcandowhat every
ouwantt
odot
omei
n
exvhangeofP500.”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#26

Laterthatevening,Kennymassagedherabdomen
thenpausedt akingherphonet hencall
edhim again
buthewasn’ tpicking.Herhear tski
ppedascardr ove
i
nout side,shewentt othekitchenandheatedhi s
food.Secondsl aterAr onawal kedinsi
dethehouse.
Kennywal kedfrom t hekitchenandsmi l
ed.
“
Hey
…”
Heputthef
oodonthetable.“
Sor
ryIgotacal
lfr
om
Lebi
tso,
heneededasparewheel
.”
“
It
’sok.Ihadcooked.
”
“
Ok,
Iwantt
otakeashower
.”
Hewal kedt
ot hebedroom takingoffhi
st-
shi
rt
.
Kennywentaf t
erhim andsatont hebedwhil
ehe
showered.Minuteslaterhewalkedoutwit
hatowel
aroundhiswaist.Kennyswallowedthenst
oodup.
“
BabeIam sorr
yforaccusingyou.Nametsocal
led
meconfessi
ngtoputt
ingitther
e.Iam sor
ryfor
ever
ythi
ngIsai
d.Idi
dn’
tmeani
t,Iwasj
ustangr
y
andhurt
.Ir
egreti
t.
”
Het ookofft
hetowel andputonsomeshort
sanda
T-shir
tthenl
oti
oned.Kennytouchedhi
sback
hugginghimfrom behind.
“
Iam sor
rybaby
.Itwi
l
lnev
erhappenagai
n.”
Heturnedar
oundt
henki
ssedher
.“I
t’
sok,
it’
sint
he
past
.”
Shelookedathi m andsmi
ledt
houghther
ewasj ust
somethingof ft
houghshecoul
dn’
tputherfi
ngeron
i
t.Shebr usheditoff
.
“
Comeandeat
.”
Hef oll
owedafterhert
hensatdownwhi leshewent
totakehisplatefr
om thekit
chen.Sheputitonthe
tr
ayt oget
herwithhiswaterandwalkedbackwi t
hit.
Sheputev er
y t
hinginf
rontofhim assomeone
knockedont hedoor.Hegotupandwentt oopen.
Maat l
aandMoesi wal
kedinthenMoesi walkedover
andhuggedKenny .
“
Hey
…”
“
Hi,
whatasur
pri
se.
”
Maat
lasmi
l
edatKenny
.“HeyKen.
”
“
Hi.
”
Maat
labumpedfistwi
thhi
sbrothert
henthey
wal
kedoutchat
ti
ng.Moesil
ookedattheplat
eof
f
ood.
“Thatl
ooksgood,
butf
ir
st,
whathappenedt
oyour
neck?”
Kennysighedsi
tti
ngandtoldMoesi.Moesishook
herheadlist
eni
ngtothestory
,herhandsonher
waist
.
“Soyouletyourf
ri
endr
idewi
thy
ourmani
nyour
absence?”
“
Ithought
-“
“Whatarey outhoughtingKeneilwe?Sincewhendo
wei ncl
udeourf ri
endsinourr el
ati
onships?Don’
tyou
know?Yudon’ tdiscussy ourrel
ati
onshipwitha
fr
iendnomat terhowcl osey ouare.Youdon’teven
discussitwit
hany one.Relati
onshipisbetweentwo
people,wenay aanongy agagoet l
etse.(
Yoursis
cr
owdednow.
)”
“
Shel
ookedni
ceandi
nnocent
.”
“Don’ttheyall
?Youwi l
ll
earnthehardwayandt rust
mey ouwi llf
orevercrybecauseofaf ri
end.Us
womenwear ejealousoutthere,
it’
snotevena
secret.Wear ejealousandwewantt ofeel
whatt he
otherwomenf eelstoo.Imaginesheseesy ourguy
doingallthosethingsforyou,youthinkheistheone
whodoesn’ twantt ouseani Phone?Whodoesn’ t
wantt odoherhai reveryaft
ertwoweeks? ”
Kennysi
ghed.“
Ireal
l
ythoughtIcoul
dtr
usther
.”
“Stopthoughtingstupidthoughts.Imagineifshe
didn’
tconf esstowhatshedi d,werey ougoingto
l
eav eRona?Ofcausehewoul dn’tall
owitmmehel a
Kenny,youwoul dhav ecausedunnecessar yfights
andallforwhat ?Yourrelat
ionshiphasnot hi
ngt odo
withaf r
iend.Separatethosetwot hings.
”
“
Kebaki
l
e.”
“
Lewenammal esabostupid.Tr
ustme,af r
iendi
s
mor
edangeroust hanasnake.Afri
endorjustany
f
emalewhenitcomest oyourrel
ati
onshi
pis
dangerous.Idon’tevenletmysi
stersvi
sitbecause
notthatIdon’ttr
ustmymanbutt her
eisacer t
ain
l
ineIwillnotl
ett hem cr
oss.Any
thingcanhappen,
heisamanaf terall
.”
“
Ihav
elear
ntmyl
esson.
”
“
Youhav
e,ar
eyouokt
hough?
”
Kennynodded.
“
Yousur
e?”
“
Yes.
”
“Ot l
abolawakemot ho,Ronagaar atenonsense.
Youshoul dknowy ourman.Youshoul dt r
usthim.
Themostqui etmenar edangerous,atleastmineis
noisy,whenangryhewi l
lshout,
wewi lltal
kand
sol
v eit
,yourswil
lpunishy ourpussy,nextthingyou
knowy oucan’twalk.Lookathowy ouar esit
ted.”
“
Ihav
elear
ntmyl
esson.Iwi
l
lnev
erdoi
tagai
n.”
Moesismi l
edstari
ngather .“Good.Keepbot sal
a
(
fri
endship)outofyourrel
at i
onship.Befriendsout
t
here,notintherel
ati
onship.Ifeelsorr
yf oryoubut
youwill
bef i
neaslongy ouknowy ourplace.”
“
Yeah.
”

*
**

Atchurch,Tshenolosatbesidehermot heri
npain
butshewasn’ tgoi
ngtomov et i
l
lthepastorprayed
forher
.Shel ookedatthebigscreensandwat ched
him walkinthecrowdtouchingpeople’
sheads.
Tearsfi
lledhereyesasthepainwor sened.Her
motherlookedather.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
“
It
’spai
nful
.”
“
Justhol
don,
hei
sal
mosther
e.”
“
Ng…”
Tearsdr
oppedtheputherhandoverherst
omach
cr
yingwhil
etheprai
seandworshi
psang.Her
motherl
ookedaroundthenwentt
oanusherwho
wasstandi
ngclosetot
hem.
“
Mydaught
eri
sinpai
n,i
sitpossi
blef
orust
otake
hert
ohi
m,kanat
hepai
nget
sext
remesomet
imes.
”
“Heiscomingt
hisway
,kanathereareot
herpeopl
e
whoarealsosi
ckandi
npain.It
’snotonl
yyour
daught
er.
”
“
Youdon’
tunder
stand.
”
“Iunder
stand.Yourdaught
eri
snotonl
yonei
npai
n.
Justbepatient
.”
Tshenolo’
smot herl
ookedbackatTshenol
owho
wascryingthenshookherheadandwalkedov
erto
wherethepastorwasthenheldhi
shandkneel
ing.
“
Iam sor
ry.Iam sor
ryf
ordoi
ngt
his.
”
Thepast
orl
ookedatherasshecr
ied.
“Iknowt her
ear ealotofpeopleherewhocamef or
you,theyarealsoinpainbutpleasemydaught er…
thepainisgetti
ngwor se,shehasbeenbl eedi
ngfor
mont hsandshei salwaysinpain.Rightnowshei s
therecryi
ngbecausei thasgottenreall
ybad.Idon’t
knowwhatt odoany more,theonlywayi tgetsbett
er
i
swhenwegi v
ehert hesepill
sthatwill
knockherup.
Pleasehelpher…”
Meanhwi l
eTshenol
olookedathermotheronthebig
screenskneel
i
ngbeforethepast
or.Hehelpedher
stand.
“
Standup…wher
eisshe?
”
“
Shei
sther
e.”Shepoi
nted.
“
Let
’sgo.
”
MmagweTshenol
oledt
hepast
ort
owher
eher
daught
erwas.
“Thereshei s.HernameisTshenol
o.Shecoul
dhav
e
wentt ovarsit
ybutthepai
nwast oomuch,we
couldn’tl
ethergo.”
Thepastorlookedather
.Theusherwi
tht
heot
her
mikeputitonTshenolo’
smouth.
“
Howar
eyou?
”
Tshenol
olookedatthepastorcry
ingt
henwent
downonherknees..“Iam i
npain.Hel
pme.”
“
Howl
onghav
eyoubeeni
npai
n?”
“
Over7mont
hsnow.
”
Thepast
orl
ookedather
.“Iwantev
ery
onet
ost
ret
ch
t
hei
rhandstowardst
hisy
oungl
ady
.Wear
eal
lgoi
ng
t
oprayforher
.”
Everyonestret
chedthei
rhandstowardsherthenthe
pastorstar
tedprayi
ng,st
ret
chinghi
shandt owards
her.
“Therei snopai ny oucan’theal Lord,nopaingreater
thany ou,nowoundsy oucan’ thealforyouare
mightyone.Youar ethealphaandomega.Yousay
yesandnoonecansayno.Youopent hegatesthe
devilhascl osed, youbri
ngbr eakthroughi n
sit
uationswher ewehadgi venup, fatheryour
daught erishere…i npai
n.Iam nomi racleworkerbut
youar eandbecauseIbel i
evei nyourwor d,Ibel
ieve
i
ny ourwor dLor d,Idecl
areherheal edbyt hepower
ofJesus!Idecl ar eherfreefrom thisbondage.I
declareherabr andnewper son, f
reef r
om thi
s
tort
ure, i
nthenamei nofJesus, Isaybef ree!
”
Tshenol
ogr
unt
edast
hepai
ngotsomuchwor
se.
“
Ahhhh!
”
“Idecl
areherf
reefr
om what’
styi
ngher.I
nnameof
Jesus,befr
ee!Ever
yoneopenyourmouthand
decl
areherf
ree!Pr
ay!
”
Thecongr
egat
ionprayedwi
thhi
m ast
hepr
aiseand
worshi
psangsoft
ly.

I
’
vebeenchanged,
Heal
ed,
freed,
del
i
ver
ed
If
oundj
oy,
Peace,
graceandf
avor

I
’
vebeenchanged
Heal
ed,
freed,
del
i
ver
ed
If
oundj
oy
Peace,
graceandf
avor

Ri
ghtnowi
sthemoment
.
Todayi
stheday
I
’
vebeenchanged
I
’
vebeenchanged
Ihav
ewai
tedf
ort
hismoment
Tocome
AndIwon’
tleti
tpassmeby
Iwon’
tgoback

Ican’
tgoback
Tot
hewayi
tusedt
obe
Bef
orey
ourpr
esencecameandchangedme

Tshenoloclosedhereyesscreamingasthepray
ers
gotevenlouder.Shegaspedt hencol
l
apsed.The
pastorwalkedoverthentouchedherfor
ehead.
“
Shei
sfr
ee,
int
henameofJesus.
”
Hesi
ghedandt
ookast
epback.
“Somet i
mewear espiri
tualfi
ghts,
wet hi
nkit
sa
sickness,t
hedoctorscan’tf
indanythi
ngbuty ou
don’tknowt hati
t’
sspir
itual
.Peoplear
efight
ingwit
h
us, theyhav est ar tedbat tl
eswecan’ tseewi thour
owney es.Theyhav ecur sedus, t
heyhav eplaced
thingsonournames, y ourlifeal lofasuddenhas
becomest agnant ,youwer edoi ngsowel land
suddenl yyoul osty ourj ob,y ouusedt obef i
nanci al
ly
stabl ebutnowy oucan’ tevenbuybr ead, your
mar r
iagei sshaki ng,somear eev endi vorced,Ispeak
breakt hroughonev eryone’ sl i
ferightnow, Ispeak
breakt hroughi nt henameofJesus!Ibr eakev er
y
chai nthathav ebeenboundi ngy ou,ev eryalterseti n
yourwayt odel aysuccess, Isaybef ree!Openy our
mout handpr ay !Sayf ather, Iwillnotbeasl av eto
pain, Iwillnotbeasl av et of ail
ure,Iwi l
l notasl ave
tot hesi tuati
onIam i n, Iwillnotbeasl avetol osing!
SayIam wi nner !Iam v ictorious!Iam aconquer ,
say
Iwi l
l makei t,Iwi llgett hatj ob!Decl arei tasy ours!
Claimi t!”
MmagweTshenol
oknel
tef
oreherdaught
erwhi
l
e
ev
ery
onepr
ayed.
“
Nol
o…Nol
o…”
Tshenol
osl
owl
yopenedherey
est
henl
ookedather
mother.
“
Youar
eheal
ed.
”
Sheputherhandonherst
omachwi
thaf
rownt
hen
st
art
edcryi
ng.
“
Thepai
nisgone.
”
Hermotherhuggedherasthepeopl
ewhower
e
cl
osebywatchedemot i
onal
ly.

*
**

AtAr ona’
shouse, Maatl
adroveoffwithhisfi
ancée
whileRonast oodbythedoor,hi
shandar ound
Kenny .Theygotbackinsi
dethehouset henKenny
tookhi sfoodtotheki
tchentoreheatitagai
n.Rona
fol
lowedhert othekit
chenandl ookedather.
“
Ther
eissomet
hingIhav
etot
ell
you.
”
Kennyt
urnedandl
ookedathi
m.“
What
?”
“
Come,
weshoul
dsi
t.
”
“
Ok.
”
Heledhert
othesi
tt
ingr
oom t
henki
ssedher
.“Il
ove
you.
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
“
Iwentt
oNamet
so’
shousewhenIl
eft
.”
Kennyl
ookedathi
m,herhear
tpoundi
ng.
“Iwantedhertot el
l y
out hetruthbecauseIam not
cheati
ngsoobv iouslysheputi tthere.Ihav e
every
thingonr ecor dingfrom themomentIgoti nher
houseincasey oumayt hinkmay beIforcedherto
saywhatshedi dn’tdo.Shest artedcryingbecause
ofthesituat
ionatherhouset hensheundr essedand
tol
dmeIcoul dt akeherv irgi
nit
yf orP500.”
Kennyswal
l
owed.“
Whatdi
dyoudo?
”
“
Iwanty
out
oknowt
hatI
-“
“
Whatdi
dyoudo?Di
dyoudoi
t?”
“
Sheki
ssedme.
”
Kennyst
oodupshaki
ng.
“
Thenwhathappenedaf
ter
?”
Hel
ookedather
,gui
l
tyr
efl
ect
ingi
nhi
sey
es.
Tear
sfi
l
ledKenny
’sey
es.“
Didy
ouuseacondom?
”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#27

Aronal
ookedatherasshelookedathi
m wai
ti
ngf
or
ananswer.“
Pleasesi
tdown…”
“
Didy
ouuseacondom?
”
“
Idi
dn’
tsl
eepwi
thher
.”
Shestoppedwi
pingawayhert
ear
s.“
Thenwhat
happened?”
“
Pleasesi
tdown.
”
Shesl
owl
ysatdown.
“
Sheki
ssedmet henIpushedheraway
.Igav
eher
t
hemoneythough.”
Shef
rowned.“
Howmuchdi
dyouguv
eher
?”
“
P600.
”
“Whywoul
dyougi
vehert
hemoney
?Af
terwhatshe
did?
”
“
Shewasi
nasi
tuat
ionandsomet
hingt
oldmeshe
wouldoff
erher
selft
osomeoneelseformoney
.Her
motheri
ssickorsomet
hingandhersibl
i
ngsar
eall
bythemselv
es.
”
“Thatwhorei
snotevenav ir
gin,
andyoucoul
dhav
e
l
efthertooff
erher
self
,itseemsit’
susual
l
yher
styl
e.”
“
Iam sor
ryIgav
ehert
hemoneywi
thoutconsul
ti
ng
wi
thyou.
”
“Youshoul
dhavenev ergi
venherthatmoney,y
ou
arenotGod,Iam goi
ngtotakeitt
omor r
ow.”
Aronal
eanedovert
oki
ssherbutKennymoved.“O
batl
agontsunakamel
omoy agosunaboNamet so?
(Youwanttoki
ssmewitht
hesamel i
pst
hatkissed
Nametso?)
”
“Idi
dn’
tki
ssher
,sheki
ssedmebutIpushedher
away.”
“
Itst
il
laki
ss.
”
“Ar
eyouser
iousr
ightnow?Ibr
ushedmyt
eet
h,
comeon…”
Kennyst
oodupandsatont
hecouchwat
chi
ngTV.
Herphoner
angt
hensher
eachedf
ori
t.
“
Nol
o…”
“
KennyIam heal
ed.
”
“
Huh?
”
“
Thepai
n..t
hepai
nisgone.
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Heheal
edy
ou?
”
“Yes.KennyIam notbl
eedi
ngany
mor
e.Thepai
nis
gone.”
“
Iam sohappyf
ory
ou.
”
Nol
osni
ff
ed.“
Iam f
inal
l
ycomi
ngt
ovar
sit
y.”
“
Yes.
”
“Fr
om todayonwar
dsIam achi
l
dofGod,
Iam doi
ng
ever
ythi
ngbytheLord.
”
“
Hal
l
eluj
ahwenammaMor
uti
.”
Shelaughed.“
Iam goingt
ofindachur
chtoenter
.I
am notgoingtogobacktothewayIusedtobe.I
am goingtoassoci
atemysel
fwit
hpeoplewhoare
commi tt
edtoGod.”
Kennysmiled.“
Ok,Iguessthi
sishappi
ness
speaki
ng.Ican’
twaittoseeyou.Di
dTebatso
come?”
“No.Hecouldn’
t,
hehadtogosomewher
ewi
thwor
k
butit
’sok.Maybeit
’sf
ort
hebest
.”
“
Why
?”
“
Doy
ouknowTebat
sodoesn’
tbel
i
evei
nGod?
”
“Hewill
probabl
ystartbeli
evi
ngnowt hatyouare
heal
ed.Sometimesittakesamiracl
ef orsomeone
tobel
ieve.
”
“
May bebuti
fhedoesn’tIam goi
ngt
odi
stance
myselff
rom hi
m.Ihavechanged.
”
Kennychuckl
edknowingitwasj
ustthehappinessof
get
tingheal
edaftermont
hsofsuff
eringt
alki
ng.“Ok.
Soyouarestil
latchur
ch?
”
“
Yes.I
t’
sanal
lni
ghtser
vice.Wear
eonl
yleav
ing
t
omorrow.
”
Kennysi
ghedhappi
l
y.“
Iam r
eal
l
yhappyf
ory
ou.
”
“Youshoul
dattendt
hispast
or’
sser
vicenextt
imehe
comesback.”
“
Iwi
l
l.
”
“
Ok,Iam goi
ngbackinsi
dechur
ch,Ij
ustwantedt
o
t
ell
you.Iam goi
ngtoprayf
oryourgr
andmother
t
oo.”
“
Thanksl
ove.
”
“
Okshar
p.”
NolohungupthenKennyputherphonedown
focusi
ngontheTV.Aronalookedathert
henwalked
overandpi
ckedherupandl ai
dheronthecouchhe
hadbeensit
ti
ngon,cuddl
ingher.
Hekissedherneck.“
Iam sor
ry.I
t’
snevergoingt
o
happenagain.Al
othashappenedtoday,canwejust
for
getitandmoveon? ”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evey
ougav
ehert
hatmoney
.”
Hel
ookedatherandsmi
l
ed.“
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oobutIam annoy
ed.
”
Heki
ssedherl
i
pst
henneck.“
Sorr
y.Butl
et’
sbef
air
,
mywindowsar
eal
socr
ackedri
ghtnow.”
“
Soy
ouj
ustdr
ovel
i
ket
hat
?”
“Yeah,Iwil
lhavei
tfi
xedtomorrow.Todayhasbeen
hecti
c,let
’sj
ustputi
tbehindus.Iam hungr
y.Let
’s
eat.
”
Hest
oodupt
henKennyj
umpedonhi
sbackgi
ggl
i
ng.

*
**

Mothusisatonhi sbedthi
nkingofthedayhehad
wit
hAngelawi t
hasmi l
e.Therewasjustsomething
aboutherthatexcit
edhim,thatmadehim smi l
e
al
one.Hel ookedathisphonet hi
nki
ngofcall
ingher
butSel
etsost art
edcall
i
ng.Het ookthephoneand
pi
cked.
“
Babe…”
“
Hey
,howwasy
ourmeet
ingwi
thMar
k?”
“
Itwasf
ine.Youknowhowhei
s.”
“
Ok,kanababeLolosaidshesawy
ouatt
hemal
l
wi
thawomanhol dinghands.
”
Hi
shear
tski
ppedabeat
.“What
?”
“
Isti
ll
can’tbel
i
eveshewoul
dmakeupsuchl
i
est
o
j
ustbreakusapar
t.
”
“
Youshoul
dn’
tli
stent
oher
.”
“Ihav
eendedt
hefr
iendshi
p.Iam real
l
ytir
edof
alwayst
ryi
ngt
odef
endmyr elat
ionshi
p.”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“I
t’
sok.Whatti
mear eyoucomi
ngtomor
row?The
di
apersar
erunningout
.Youshoul
dbuymore.
”
“
Uhhy
eah.
”
“
Imi
ssy
ou.
”
“
Imi
ssy
out
oo.
”
“
Youshoul
dseey
ourson.Hel
ookssomuchl
i
ke
y
ou.
”
“
Hei
shi
sfat
her
’sson.
”
Sel
etsol
aughed.“Heis.Babekanapapawasaski
ng
i
fyouaregoi
ngt opaybogadifort
hebaby.
”
“
Yes,
Iam.
”
“
Ok.SoIt
hinkweshoul
dmov
etoabi
ggerhouse.
Wi
tht
hebabyweneedmor
espace.
”
“
Yeah…”
Sel
etsoy
awned.“
Eish,
Iam sot
ir
ed.
”
“
Youshoul
dsl
eep.
”
Shechuckl
ed.“
Idon’
twantt
ohangup.
”
“Youaregoi
ngtoseemet
omor
row.GapeIhav
ea
surpr
isef
oryou.
”
“
Whati
sit
?”
“
Youwi
l
lseei
twhenIcomet
her
e.”
Shel
aughed.“
Ok.
”
Mot
husi
lookedatt
hewat
chonhi
swr
istt
hensi
ghed.
“
Ithi
nky
oushoul
dsl
eepwhi
l
ehei
sst
il
lsl
eepi
ng.
”
Shey
awnedagai
n.“
Youar
eri
ght
.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Met
oo.Goodni
ght
.”
Hehungupt
hencal
l
edAngel
a.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,Iwasf
all
i
ngasl
eep.
”
“
Sor
ry.Todaywasf
un.
”
Angel
asi
ghed.“
Itwas.NowIr
eal
l
ycan’
twai
tformy
car
.”
“
Keabor
egaandIam notev
ensl
eepy
.”
“
Comeov
er,
wewi
l
lwat
chsomet
hingt
oget
her
.”
“
Rightnow?
”
“Yes.Youaretooex
cit
edbecauseoft
hecar
,come
overIwil
lcal
my oudown.
”
Hel
aughedthenhungupgr
abbi
nghi
scarkey
sand
wal
kedout
.

*
***

Selet
so’ssist
erparkedt
hecari
nfr
ontoft
hegat
e
thenlookedatLetso.
“Pl
easedon’
tmakemeregrett
his.Gapedon’
thav
e
sexwhil
eyouar
esti
l
lnursi
ngthosestit
ches.
”
“
Iwon’
t.Ij
ustwantt
oseehi
m.”
“
Icanseeyour
eal
lyl
ovethisguy
,Ij
usthopehe
l
ovesyouasmuchasyoulovehi
m.”
Sel
etsosmi
l
ed.“
Hedoes.Mot
husi
isdi
ff
erent
.”
“
Ok,
iwi
l
lbeher
eby5t
otakey
oubackhome.
”
“
Ok.
”
Selet
sosteppedoutt henslowl
ywalkedtowardst he
housetaki
ngoutherspar ekeyswhil
ehersi st
er
droveoff
.Sheunlockedt hedoorandslowlywalked
i
nbuthersmi ledi
sappear edasshelookedatthe
barebed.Shetookputherphoneandcal ledhim
l
ockingbehindhim andsitti
ngonthebed.
“
Heybabe…”
“
Hey
,al
readysl
eepi
ng?
”
“
Yes.Whati
sit
?”
“
No.It
hinkImi
ssy
out
oomuch.
”
Mot
husichuckl
ed.“
Met
oo,
Iwi
l
lbet
her
etomor
row
mor
ning.
”
“
Yeah,
okby
e.”
“
Bye,
myphonei
sswi
tchi
ngof
f.Wewi
l
ltal
k
t
omor
rowmor
ning.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shehungupt henlookedaroundt heemptyr
oom
wonderi
ngwher ehewas.Herey esfel
lonhi
s
passpor
tthenshegoti tandlookedatthest
amps.
Sheputitunderthepil
lowandgoti nbedanxi
ousl
y
wait
ingforhi
m.

*
**

Thefol
lowingmor ni
ng,
Kennyknockedon
Nametso’sapart
mentdoor.Thedooropenedthen
herl
esbianhousematesmiledst
ari
ngather.
“
Kenny
,hi
…”
“
Hi,
isNamei
n?”
“
Yes.Shei
sinherr
oom.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shewalkedinwhil
ethehousematewal
kedoutt
o
hercaranddrov
eoff.Kennywal
kedtoName’sr
oom
thenopenedwalkingin.Namet
sot
urnedt
oher
gett
ingupfrom herbag.
“
Kenny
…”
“
Giv
emet
hemoneymyboy
fri
endgav
etoy
ou.
”
“
What
?”
“
Givemet
hemoneymyboy
fri
endgav
etoy
ou!He
t
oldmeev
ery
thi
ng.
”
“
Thatmoneyi
smi
ne.I
twashi
s,noty
our
s.”
Kennywal
kedov
ert
hensl
appedher
.“Gi
vemet
hat
money.
”
Namet sohel
dhercheekstar
ingathert
hentr
ied
sl
appingKennybackbutKennydodgedandpunched
hert
wi ceonthef
acewhileholdi
ngthecol
l
erofhert
-
shi
rt
.
“
Giv
ememyboy
fri
end’
smoney
!”
Namet sost
aggeredback.“Iam notgiv
ingittoyou,
youcrazygolddi
ggingbit
ch!Yout hi
nksohi ghl
yof
your
selfbutwhathemightnothav etoldyouisthat
wefucked.”
KennywentforNamet so’
shandbagthentookout
every
thi
ngincludi
ngherphone,I
Dandt hecash.
Kennycountedthemoneyandputi ti
nherpocket
thenthr
ewev eryt
hingonthef
loor
.
“Youar esocheap,youwil
l f
oreverbecheapandy ou
willdi
echeap.Throwingyourselfatamanwhodon’ t
evenwanty ou.Youarepathetic,gobacktoyour
vil
lageandcontinuesl
eepingwi t
hmenf orfood
sinceyourmothercan’tdoitnow.May beyoursi
ster
willj
oinyousoonenough.”
Namet solookedatKennytear
ful
l
y.“Don’
tconfuse
yoursel
fwithmehun, youaret
heonewhoi s
sleepi
ngwi t
hanoldmani nret
urnofaniceli
festy
le,
newhai r
styl
eandanewphone.AndIsl eptwith
him.”
“
Atl
eastIam get
ti
ngsomethi
ngrealoutofit,
seems
y
oursi
sterai
ntwort
hthatmuch.Coul
dn’tkeepthe
f
amil
yeati
ngformorethanf
ourmonths.”
Tearsr
oll
eddownNamet
so’
scheeks.“
Mysi
ster
doesn’
tsl
eepwit
hmen!
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Whoar
eyout
ryi
ngt
oconv
ince?
”
“Iwasn’
tgoingtotell
yout hisbuttheny oushould
hearit
.Hefuckedmewi ththathugedi ckofhis.He
coul
dn’tst
opgruntingandgr oaning.Hewaschoki ng
mewhi l
eatitwhisperri
ngdirtynothingstome. ”
Kennylaughed.“Stopit
,youardembarssingy oursel
f.
I
fmymanhadf uckedyou,youwouldn’tbeupand
tal
ki
ngr ubbishri
ghtnow.Youwon’tevenbewal king
butIknowy out r
iedt
okisshim wit
hyourr ot
ten
mouth.Andmymandoesn’ twhi
sperdirt
ynothings
i
nears,hef uckensaysthem l
oudsoy ouheart hem!”
Nametso’
sli
pstrembl
edasshecr
ied.“
Getoutofmy
house,
prost
it
ute!
”
“
Prost
it
utekemmago.
”
Kennylookedar
oundheral
mostempt
yroom t
hen
walkedout.
Nametsot
ookadeepbreat
hbutt
ear
sfi
l
ledherey
es
t
hatshebr
okedowncry
ing.

*
**
InMaun, Seletsolookedoutthroughthewi ndow
stari
ngatMot husiwithawoman.Sher emov edt
he
keysfrom thedoort hensatont hebedwhi lehe
l
aughedwi tht hewoman.Mot husiunl
ockedt hedoor
thenwalkedi n,hefrozest
ari
ngatherwhi l
eshe
calmlysatont hebed.Angelawal kedinthenpaused
alsostar
ingatSel etso.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#28

Sel
etsolookedatbothofthem cal
mlywhi
le
Mothusi’
sheartpoundedsomuchi twasi
nit’
sown
marathon.Heclear
edhisthroat
.
“
Heybabe…”
Selet
sosmi l
ed.“Hi
,comein,lewenammat sena,
kanteleemetsengmokgor ong?(y
outoocomei n,
whyar eyoustandi
ngbythedoor?)”
“Uhhsheisthecleaningladywhowasgoi ngtoclean
thehouse.It
’sabitdustysoIthoughtIwouldfi
nd
someonet oclean.HernameisLerato.”
“
Thecl
eani
ngl
ady
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Wher
edi
dyougether
?”
“
Shei
stheonewhousual
l
ycl
eansf
orThabang.
”
“
Howdi
dyougether
?”
“
Thabanggav
emehernumber
.”
Selet
sol
ookedathi
m.“
Ok.Letmecal
lThabang
then.
”
“Comeonbabe,
youwanthi
mtot
hinkwear
ehav
ing
probl
ems?
”
“Whatproblemsar ewehav i
ng?Wear enothavi
ng
problems.Ijustwanttoconform wi
thThabang
that’
sall
.Orr at
hershowmet heconver
sati
onyou
hadwi t
hThabangwhenhesenty outhenumber?
”
“
Itwasacal
l
.”
“
Ok,
thenIam conf
ir
mingwi
thhi
m.”
Sel
etsot
ookoutherphonethencal
ledThabang
put
ti
ngthephoneonloudspeaker
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
HiThabang,
it’
sSeletso,
thankyouf orl
ett
ing
Mot
husiuseyourhelperforourhousetoo.
.”
“
Huh?
”
“
Don’
tyouhav
eamai
d?”
Ther
ewassi
l
encef
oramoment
.“UhIhav
e.”
“
Hernamei
sKar
abor
ight
?”
“
Yes.
”
“Thankyousomuch,youar
egreatf
ri
end.Ar
eyou
sureyoudon’
tneedhert
oday?
”
“
Uhno,
shecomesonSunday
sonl
y.
”
“
Ok,
bye.
”
“
Bye.
”
Sel
etsost
oodup.“
Giv
emey
ourphone.
”
Angel
atookast
epback.“
UhhIt
hinkIhav
etogo.
”
Sel
etsol
ookedatthelady.“
Ngng,wher
ear
eyou
goi
ngnurselady
?Youar enotgoi
ngany
wher
e.Gi
ve
methatphoneMothusi.
”
“
Whatf
or?
”
Seletsopickedhi
spasspor tfr
om thebed“ Stop
testingme.Foryoutohav eaj ob,youneedt ohave
thispassport,
Iwil
ldestr
oyi tanditwon’ttakea
mi nutef
orMar ktogetsomeoneel se.Gi
vemet hat
phone.Ifyourgir
lf
ri
endlovesy ou,shewi l
lnotgo
any wher
ebecausey ourpasspor t
’ssurvi
valdepends
onthetr
utht
oday
.Ti
saf
ounu.(
Handov
ert
he
phone.
)”
Hehandedhert hephonet henshewentt hroughit
standi
ngbesidethebucketf ullofwat
erreadyto
throwthepassporti
nit.Sher eadthei
rconversat
ion
thenthrewthephoneinsidet hewater
.
“Soy
ouboughtacarwi
tht
hemoneyy
ouwant
edt
o
paymagadi
with?
”
“
Canwet
alkaboutt
hisl
i
keadul
ts?
”
“Yes,t
alk.Youwantt oleaveyourchi
l
dandIbecause
youfoundsomet hingnew?Youf oundanew
excit
ementiny ourli
fe,
thebabyandIdon’
tmatter
anymore.Isthatit
?Obat lagontogel
aMothusi
?
(Youwantt oleaveme? )”
Hel
ookedathi
spasspor
tinherhands.
“
No.
”
“Hedoesn’
twanty ouanymoremma!Youarel
i
ter
all
y
hol
dinghim host
ageinthi
srel
ati
onshi
p!”
Sel
etsol
ookedatMothusi.“
Am Ihol
dingyou
host
agenehrra?Di
dn’
tIsayify
ouwantt ogoyou
cango?
”
“
Babecomeon,
Ilov
eyou.Imadeami
stake.
”
“
Mot
husi
behonestwi
thher
.Thi
sisy
ourchance.
”
Seletsonoddedt henhandedhi m backhispassport.
“Thereisyourpasspor t
.”Sher aisedherhands.“I
hav enothi
ngt oattackyouwithi fyouthinkIwantto
attackyou.Ifyouwantt oleavemeandy ourchi
ld,
sayi t
.Mysi st
eriswaiti
ngout sideforme.Ishoul d
behomer ightnow.Islepthereandy ouwerenot
there.Iknowy ousleptwithhersor r
adon’tyouthink
youshoul djustendit?Let’
sjustendi t.
”
Mot husi
putthepasspor
tont
hebedstari
ngather
asshehel dherst
omachwhil
eleani
ngbackonthe
fr
idge.
“Iam sor
ryabouty
ourphonebuti
fyoucanaf
for
da
cari
tmeansy oucanaff
ordanewone.”
“
Ilov
eyou.Imadeami
stake.Iwanty
ou.
”
Angelachuckl
ed.“
HeelaMothusi,
shei
sgivingyoua
chancetowalkoutfr
om t
hislovel
essr
elat
ionshi
p.”
“
Ilov
emygi
rl
fr
iend!Inev
ersai
dIwasl
eav
ingher
.
Whatev
erwehadisover,
gapeitwasj
ustsex.Ke
kopaotsamay
e.(
Pleaseleav
e.)
”
“
What
?”
“Leav
e.Il
oveSel
etso,
Isai
dwhaty
ouwant
edt
ohear
sowecanhavesex.”
Angel
alookedathi
m shocked.“
Ist
hisaj
oke?
”
“No.Iam notgoingtol
eavemygi
rl
fr
iend,
Iwas
neverpl
anningto.Leav
e.”
“
Youar
egoi
ngt
oregr
ett
his!
”
Angel
awal kedoutangr
il
yslammingt
hedoorbehi
nd
her
.Selet
sot ear
ful
l
ylookedathi
m.
“
Am Ihol
dingy
ouhost
age?
”
“
No.
”
Atearroll
eddownhercheekt henshewi peditaway.
“Mothusi
,pleasesety our
selffreeifyouar eina
l
ovelessrel
ationshi
p.Thereisnousef oryout obe
wit
hme.Youcanal waysleave.Noonei sf or
cing
youtostay.Justleave.Youwi l
l seeyourchi l
d.Iam
notgoingtodenyy ouseeingy ourchild.Buty ou
shouldknowy oucanal waysleav e.
”
“Il
oveyou.Iam real
lysorr
y.I
t’
sjustthatIam
sexual
lyf
rustr
ated.Ihaven’
thadsexinal ongt
ime.
Youdidn’
twantt ohavesexwhenpr egnant.
”
Shelookedathi
mthenundr
essedsl
owl
yandl
ayon
thebed.
“
Youwantsex,
takei
t…”
Helookedatherasgui
l
tychockedhi
m.“
Iknowy
ou
ar
einpainand-“
“
Takeit.Ifwhat
’swhatmaki
ngyoucheat,t
hent
ake
i
t.Bequick,mysist
eri
swait
ingout
side.
”
Helookedatheroperati
onst
it
chesthenshookhi
s
head.“
Iam notdoi
ngt hi
stoyou.ImessedupandI
am sor
ry.I
t’
snotgoingtohappenagain.
”
Shestar
edathi
m cry
ing.“
Youaregoingtogoback.
Youaregoi
ngtobacktoherbecausesheisgi
vi
ng
yousexandIwon’
tbeabletodoit.Sodoit
…atleast
i
twil
lgivemepeaceofmindtoknowIdidmypar t
.”
“Iam del
eti
nghernumber
.Iam sor
ry.Pl
easedr
ess
up.”
Hepi
ckedherdr
esst
henhel
pedherputi
ton.
“
Iam sorr
yIcheat
edbuti
t’
snotbecauseIdon’
tlov
e
y
ou.Ilov
ey ousomuch.
”
“Buty
ouboughtacarwi
ththemoneyyouwantedto
paymagadiwi
th.I
tmeansyoureal
l
ydon’tcar
e.Di
d
youevenuseacondom?”
“
Yes.Iam goi
ngt oret
urnthecar.Iwi
ll
gobackto
t
heorigi
nalpl
an.Inafewmont hs,Iwouldhav
e
r
aisedenoughforanothercar
.”
Hekissedhercar
essi
nghercheek.“
Iam sor
ry,
pl
easeforgi
veme.”
“Dowhatyouwantt
odo.I
fit
’sl
eav
ingme,
bef
ree.I
am goi
ng.
”
Shestoodupt hensl
owlywal
kedouttohersist
er’
s
car
.Sheputherhandsonherf acecr
yingt
henher
si
stersadl
ylookedatherbef
oredri
vi
ngoff.

*
**

Meanwhi
leMothusi
satonthebed,handsonhi
s
f
ace.Hi
shear
twasst i
l
lpoundi
ng,heswall
owed
thenf
ishedhi
sphonefr
om thebucketf
ull
wi t
hwater
andwalkedoutl
ocki
ngbehi
ndhim.Hegoti nthecar
anddroveoutt
othemotorcent
er.

*
**

Latert
hatday,Tshenol
owal kedovertoTebatso’
s
caratthemall
’sparki
nglotthenjumpedi n.He
l
ookedather,sheactual
lylookeddif
ferent.He
huggedher.
“
Hey
…howar
eyou?
”
Tshenol
osmiled.“
Iam st
il
lnotbl
eedi
ng.I
tjust
st
oppedincl
udingthepai
n.”
Tebat
sol
eanedbackt
hent
ookapl
ast
icf
rom t
he
back.
“
Igoty
ousomet
hing.
”
Shet
ooki
tthensmi
l
edl
ooki
ngi
nsi
de.“
Thanks.
”
“
Youcoul
dn’
tenj
oyi
twhensi
ckbutIam sur
enow
y
ouwil
l.
”
Shebl
ushed.“
Thanks.
”
Tebatsolookedather,thedar
kcirclesunderher
eyeshaddi sappear
ed.Hesmi l
edst ar
ingather
beauti
fulfacewonderi
ngwher ethatbeaut yhad
been.Shej ustl
ookedasifshehadbeenr ebir
thed
thathefoundhi msel
ffeel
ingnervousallofasudden.
“
Ihav
edeci
dedt
ost
artgoi
ngt
ochur
ch.
”
Tebat
sol
ookedather
.“Oh…t
hat
’sgood.
”
“Youshouldal
soatt
endwi thme.Iwantt
ostar
t
workingonmyrelat
ionshipwi
thGodandthatmeans
associat
ingwi
thbel
ievers.
”
Henodded.“
Ok,
Iwi
l
lgowi
thy
ou.
”
Shesmi
led.“ThankGod!Iwantt
oli
vebyGod’
srul
es.
Nomoresinning.
”
Henoddedst
ari
ngathercatchi
ngj
usthowl
i
ghther
voi
cewasandsmil
ed.“Ok.
”
“
Youshoul
dhav
emett
hispast
or…”
Helookedatherli
steni
ngasshest
art
edt
alki
ng
abouttheser
vice.
*
**

Kennywal kedfr
om schoolt
hensighedt
hrowing
herselfonthebedexhaust
ed.Sheopenedtookher
phoneandr epl
iedtoafewmessagesonher
What sAppthenthought
ful
l
ycall
edhergrandmother
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
Kennysmi
l
edl
i
steni
ngt
oherl
uci
dvoi
ce.“
Mmama…”
“
Kenny
,howar
eyou?
”
“Iam f
ine.Ical
l
edy
oui
nthemor
ningbuty
ouwer
e
outofit.
”
“
Eish,
thi
ssi
ckness.
”
“
Buty
ouar
efi
nenow.
”
“
Howar
eyou?
”
“Iam fi
ne.Mmamay ouknowTshenol
owentt
othi
s
churchandshegotheal
ed.”
“
Oh…”
“
Yes,nextt
imewhent
hispast
orcomesbackIam
t
aki
ngy ouwit
h.”
“
Mysi
cknessi
sjustcausedbyol
dage.
”
“
Youar
enott
hatol
d.”
“
Iam.
”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Mamacal
l
edme.
”
“
Whatdi
dshewant
?”
“
Shewasj
ustchecki
nguponme.
”
“
Kefi
lwe?Justcheki
ngupony
ou?Whatdi
dsheask
f
or?
”
“
Not
hing.
”
“
Kenny
,Iknowmydaught
er.Whatdi
dshewant
?”
“
Somemoney
.”
“
Iknewi
t,Ihopey
oudi
dn’
tgi
veher
.”
“
Shesai
dshehadanemer
gency
.”
“Shewill
alwayshaveanemergency.Shewil
lnev
er
nothaveanemer gency
.Youshouldn’
thav
egiven
herthatmoiney
.”
“
Mmamamay
beshechanged.
”
“Shehasn’
tchanged.Shewillf
oreverbelikethis.
Sheknowsy ouwhenshei sinneedbutwhenal li
s
well
,youwil
lneverseeherfaceorhearherv oice.
Nextti
medon’tevenanswerhercal l
s.Iknowshei s
yourmotherbutyourmotheristhedevil
’sdaughter.
”
Someoneknockedonherdoor
,Kennygotupand
openedt
henfronwedst
ari
ngatNametso.
“Mmama,
letmecal
lyouback.Someonei
satt
he
door
.”
“
Ok.
”
Shehungupandl
ookedatNamet
so.“
Whatdoy
ou
want
?”
“
Icamet oapologize.Iam sorr
yItri
edtobr eakup
y
ourr el
ati
onshipwithyourboyfri
end.IguessIwas
j
ustenviousofyouandwhathewasdoi ngf ory
ou.I
f
eelreall
yguil
tyandIam sor r
y.”
“Ican’
tbel
i
eveevenaf
terthatyouwantedtohave
sexwithhi
m.Onogamony anakewena.(Youar
ea
snake.
)Aft
erIt
ri
edtohelpy ou,
Igotyoutry
ingt
o
snat
chmyman.
”
“Iam sor
ryKenny.Wedidn’
tsleept
ogether.Ij
ust
saidi
ttohurtyoubecauseyouwereinsut
ingmy
famil
y.”
“
Iwoul
dhav
eknowni
fyousl
eptwi
thhi
m.”
“Iam sorr
y,Iam l
eav
ingt
oni
ght.Ibr
oughtapeace
offer
ing.I
t’
snotmuchbut…butit
’ssomethi
ng.
”
Shehandedherabot tl
eofdrink.Kennytooki
tthen
watchedherwalkaway .Sheclosedherdoorand
pouredthedri
nkinthesinkbeforegett
ingbackon
herbedcall
inghergrandmother.

*
**

Namet sogotbackinherr
oom andsatdownst ar
ing
atherbagwonderinghowlongti
ll
someonef ound
Kennydead.Shelookedatthet
imethenlaydown
wait
ing.Herphonerang.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Name,
it’
smmagweSego.Whenar
eyoucomi
ng?
Yourmotheri
sst
il
li
nhi
spoi
tal
.”
“
Iam get
ti
ngi
ntheev
eni
ngbus.
”
“
Okby
e.”
“
Bye.
”

3YEARSLATER
.
.
Let'
squickl
yli
keandcommentsowecanhav
eour
nextbonusfamil
y
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#29

Thr
eeYear
sLat
er.
..

Kennysmi l
edashernai lt
echnici
anf
ini
shedupwit
h
hernail
swhileherhairdr
esserlai
ddownheredges
ni
cely.Herhair
dressersmiled.
“Ei
shmmawenaomont
let
hat
aahh!(
Youar
etoo
beaut
if
ul.
)”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Thanks.
”
Hernailt
echl
aughed.“
Ever
yti
meKennywalks,she
makessureshetur
nsheads.I
tmustbeannoyi
ngfor
yourman.Imagi
nehavi
ngagirlwhoev
ery
onesis
j
ustlooki
ngat.
”
Kennylookedatnai
l
slaughi
ng.“
It
’snotev
enl
i
ke
that
.”
“
Comeandseey
ourhai
r.
”
Shest
oodupt
henpul
l
eduphersi
ze34j
eanst
hen
l
ookedathersel
fonthemi r
ror.Thebr
aidsr
eached
herbum shesmil
edstari
ngatherpret
tysel
f.She
tur
nedbacktoherhair
dresserandsmil
ed.
“
Ilov
eit
,thanky
ousomuch.Iam swi
ping.
”
“
Comet
hisway
.”
Shefol
l
owedthehairdr
essert
henswipedthet
otal
amountandputthecar
dbackinherhandbagt
aking
outaP200note.
“
Youguy
scanspl
i
tit
.Thanky
ousomuch.
.”
“
Sur
eMakenzo!
”
Kennywalkedoutputti
ngonhersungl assesthen
walkedtothecar.Sheunlockeditfr
om adistance
thengotinastheowneroft heshinyLandRov er
besidest
heBMW unl ockedhi scar
.Thedriv
erstood
byhiscarstar
ingatKennyt henwalkedoverwitha
smile.
“Heywena!Kengol
emont
ley
ana?(
Whyar
eyout
his
beaut
if
ul?
)”
Kennyturnedtohimlaughi
ng.“
War
engnehr
ra?
(Whatarey ousay
ing?)
”
“
Kengolemontl
eyana?Gomol at
owai
tse?(
Whyar
e
y
outhi
sbeaut
if
ul?I
t'
sil
legal
.)
”
Shest
art
edt
hecarl
aughi
ng.“
Idi
dn’
tknow.
”
“I
t’
sagainstt
helawt
obet
hatpr
ett
y,whatar
eyou
doingt
onight
?”
“
Iam hav
ingdi
nnerwi
thmyman.
”
“
Cancel.Therei
sthisnewIt
ali
anrestaur
antthathas
j
ustopened.”Hehandedherhisbusi
nesscard.“Cal
l
mesot hatIcansendyoumoneyt ogetadress.”
Hegoti
nhi scart
hensmi l
edr
eversi
ng.Kenny
l
ookedatthecardlaughingwhi
leshaki
ngherhead
t
henshethrewitoutsideanddrov
eof f
.

*
**

AtArona’
sbackyar
d, Moesi
tookpict
uresatt
hethe
workthedecoteam haddonethenPeowalkedover
.
“
Thi
sisr
eal
l
yni
ce.
”
“
Iknow,
eish,
wai
tseboKennybal
ucky
.”
Peosmil
ed.“
Iknow,andnowwit
hhergoingsofar
away…Icanal
readyseegor
eRonai
sstressed.
”
“Maatl
awastel
li
ngmey est
erdaythatheisr
eall
y
str
essedout
,healr
eadylostweight.Wit
hherbeing
sofaraway,
hedoesn’tkbowhowhewi l
lsur
viv
e.”
“Theproblem withdati
ngprett
ygi rl
s,t
odayhe
probablycan’tbr
eathewonderingwhatwi llhappen
whilesheishundr edmetersaway .Ioncewentout
withKennyandt hemencoul dn’tstoptry
ingtoget
herandnotj ustanymen, r
ealmenmma, theones
whowearexpensi vesui
tsanwat ches.Sheis
probablygoingtocheat.
”
Moesil
ookedatPeo.“Kennyi
snotli
ket
hat
.She
doesn’
tcheatandshel
ovesArona.
”
“Youneverknow,shewi
llmeetsomeonef
armuch
bett
erthanAronaandshewil
lleav
e.”
“
Arewegossi
ping?
”
Peoshookherhead.“
Ngng,
Iam j
ustt
ryi
ngt
o-“
“Kennyhasbeennot
hingbutf
ait
hful
toRona.No
doubtshelov
eshim,i
fshewantedtocheatshe
wouldhavelongdoneit.Shehasstuckbyhi
ssi
de
thr
oughthickandthi
n,i
t’snotherf
aultt
hatmenl
ust
overherbecauseofherlooks.
”
“
Ral
way
aanong?
”
“
No,
Iam j
ustsay
ing.
”
Theybothkeptquiett
henMoesi walkedtoMaatla
whowast ypi
ngonhi sphone.Shelookedatthe
scr
eenthenheslidhisphoneinhispocketand
ki
ssedher.
“
Hey
…”
“
Wher
eisRona?
”
“
Hewentt
ocol
l
ectKenny
’sgi
ft
.”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Gonkgal
eny
alo.
”
Maatlal
aughed.“Yeah,hesay
simmediatelyaft
er
shegraduates,
hei sgoi
ngtomarr
yher.Ijusthope
theysur
viveherinter
nshi
p.Wi
thhermovingt oMaun,
Iam gett
ingworried.
”
“
Babearen’
tyout
heonewhosaidyoubeli
evein
t
hei
rlov
e?Ido.Anywho,
Ican’
twai
tforourtr
ip.
”
Maat
lakissedher
.“Met
oo.Wer
eal
l
yneedi
t.The
ki
dsexhaustme.”
Maatl
a’
sphonerangf
rom hi
spocket,het
ooki
tand
swi
pedthescr
eenwhil
eMoesilookedathi
m.
“
Whoi
sit
?”
“I
t’
stheguysatwork.Itol
dthem t
odayIam goi
ngt
o
hel
pmybr otherbi
dfarewel
ltohi
sgir
lf
ri
endbutyou
knowhowt heyare.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Yeah…”
Moreoftheguestarr
ivedandset
tl
edont
heni
cel
y
decor
atedbackyar
d.

*
**

Tshenol
ohelpedsetupfort
heallni
ghtSatur
day
serv
iceatchur
chinherl
ongdressandadoeki nher
head.Afri
endwalkedov
erandtogethert
heyworked.
“
Hey
…Iam al
i
ttl
elat
e.”
“
It
’sok,
wear
eal
mostdone.
”
“
Thepast
or’
ssoni
sher
e.”
Tshenololi
ft
edherheadandlookedasKgosi wal
ked
tothestageandsatinf
rontofthekeyboard.He
playedafewkeysandsangsof tly
.Tshenolo’
sphone
rangthenshesteppedbacktakingitout
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,Iam par
kedi
nfr
ontofy
ourchur
ch.
”
“
Ok,
wai
t.Iam comi
ng.
”
Sheputherphonebacki nherjacket’
spocketthen
walkedout.Shelookedaroundsearchingf
orthe
BMW t henwalkedoverandgotin.Kennysmiledat
herignori
ngthedoekinherheadt hatmadeherlook
tenyearsolder
.
“
Hey
…”
ShelookedatKenny
’sonear
m cr
opt
opandsi
ghed.
“Hi
.”
“
Iam l
eav
ingt
oni
ghtwi
tht
heev
eni
ngbus.
”
“
Ohok,
goodl
uck.
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Whathappened?
”
“
Wit
hwhat
?”
“AhhmmaIf eell
iket
her
eisdistancebetweenus,
ever
ytimeItryt
ocomecloserit
’slikey
oukeep
movingback.Di
dIdosomething?”
Tshenoloshrugged.“Youdi dn’
tdoany t
hingwr
ong,
wej ustdon’
thaveal otofthingsincommon.Iam a
churchgoer,youar enot.Igavemyl i
fetoGodand
youhav en’
t,
nott hatt
hereisany t
hingwrongwit
h
thatbutIdon’tbeli
eveinmostt hi
ngsy oudo.
”
“
Mostt
hingsIdo?
”
“Yes,mostoft
het
imeourconv
ersat
ionendupi
n
arguments.
”
“Becauseyoucan’
tacceptmeforwhoIam.Youar
e
j
udgment al
.Youbel
ievi
nginGodandgoingt
o
churchever
ySundaydoesn’tmakey
ouJesus’
cousin.
”
“
Andt
hisi
swhyy
ouandIar
edr
if
ti
ng.
”
“Can’
twejustbefr
iendswi
thoutall
ofthat.Ibel
iev
e
i
nGod, Ij
ustdon’
tgotochurcheverySunday.That
doesn’
tmakemeanonbel iever
.Thisisthesame
reasonwhyy ourrel
ati
onshi
pwithTebat
sof
ail
ed.
Noloy ouhavetotoneitdown.Godsai
dwe
shouldn’
tjudge.
”
Tshenol
osighed.“
Ihavet
ogoandrehearsewit
hthe
worshi
pteam.Goodluckony
ouri
nternship.
”
Shesteppedoutt
henwal
kedbacki
nchur
chand
j
oinedKgosionst
age.

*
**

KennydrovetoArona’
shousefeeli
ngdisappoi
nted,
thatwasnothowshehadi maginedtheconver
sation
goingdown.Herphonerangthenshesmi l
edpicki
ng.
“
Heybabe,
wher
ear
eyou?
”
“Iam onmywayhome.It
houghtIwouldpassby
andtalkt
oTshenol
oli
key
ousuggested.”
“
Whathappened?
”
“
Ifeel
li
keourf
ri
endshi
pissinki
ngandIdon’tknow
whatt
odoaboutit
.Myheartisbreaki
ng,
itf
eelsli
ke
abr
eakupandal
lbecauseIr
efusedt
ogot
ochur
ch.
”
“
Iam sor
ry.Peopl
edr
if
tal
lthet
ime.
”
“Notli
kethi
sRona, andnotov erchurch.NoloandI
havebeenfri
endssi ncepri
mar y.I
tfeel
slikeshehas
l
etthischur
chthinggett oherheadandt hetimeI
wenttoherchurch,doy ouknowt hepastortoldmeI
needtobreakupwi theveryonewhodoesn’ tgoto
church.
”
“
Iknow,
yout
oldmet
hat
,lookj
ustcomehome.
”
“
Iam al
mostt
her
e.”
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Apol i
cecarsi
renwentoffbehi
ndher,shel
ooked
throughherr
earvi
ewmi r
ror
sthensloweddownand
stoppedthecaronthesi
deoftheroad.
“
Babe,
thepol
i
cest
oppedme.
”
“
Probabl
yfort
alki
ngont
hephone.
”
“
Hei
scomi
ng,
shar
p.”
Shehungupandputawayherphoner
oll
i
ngdown
t
hewindowasthepol
iceoff
icerl
eanedov
er.He
l
ookedathert
hencl
earedhi
st hr
oat.
“Tal
ki
ngont hephonewhi
l
edr
ivi
ngi
sil
l
egal
,you
knowthatr
ight?
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Pleasef
orgi
veme.
”
“
Letmeseey
ourl
i
cense.
”
Shet
ookoutherl
i
censeandhandedi
ttohi
m.
“
Kenei
l
we,
whyar
eyoubr
eaki
ngt
hel
aw?
”
Sheputherhandst
ogetherbeggi
ng.“
Ther
rawenaI
am sosorr
y.Pl
easefor
giveme.”
“
Letmeseet
hephone.
”
“
Arey
out
aki
ngi
t?”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Letmeseei
t.Unl
ocki
t.
”
Shehandedhimt hephoneunl
ockedt
henhe
presseditf
orafewsecondsandgaveitback
togetherwi
thherli
cense.
“Nextt
imeIwon’
tlety
ouof
fsoeasi
l
y.St
opt
alki
ng
onthephone.
”
“
Yessi
r!
”
Hewal kedbackt
othecarwhil
eshescrol
ledt
hrough
herphonetryi
ngtoseewhathehaddone.Herphone
rang.
“
Hey
…hel
etmego.Iwi
l
lbet
her
einaf
ewmi
nut
es.
”
“
Hel
ety
ougoj
ustl
i
ket
hat
?”
“
Hel
etmegowi
thawar
ning.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Iam comi
ng.
”
Shehungupanddr ovehome.Mi nuteslatershe
droveintheyardpassi
ngt hecar sparkedatt heside
oftheroadthensteppedoutst aringasev er y
one
stoodholdi
ngcardswr i
ttenFAREWELLt oget her
withball
oons.Shesmi l
edemot ionallycl
osi ngt he
cardoorastheycheeredf orher.Ronawal kedov er
andhuggedher .
“
Hey
…”
“
Youdi
dthi
s?”
“
Ithoughtsi
ncey
ouar
eleav
ingme,
Iwoul
dthr
ow
y
ouami
nif
arewel
lpar
ty.
”
Tear
sfi
l
ledherey
es.“
YouknowIdon’
twantt
oleav
e
you.
”
“
Iknow…”
Hekissedherwhilesomepeopletookvideos.Ar
ona
pausedthentuckedherbrai
dsbehindherear
exposi
ngherbeaut i
ful
face.
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Thanks.
”
“
Igoty
ouapr
esent
.”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
What
?”
Everyonemov edexposi
ngthewhiteJeepWrangl
er.
Kennygaspedst ari
ngathercart
henlookedat
Arona,herheartpoundi
ng.
Ar
onasmi
l
ed.“
It
’sy
our
s.”
“
What
?”
“
Yeah…”
Shescr
eamedst
ari
ngatt
hecar
.
*

Meanwhi
l
eAt
sil
elookedathi
sol
derbr
other
.
“
Wasn’
theget
ti
nghersomet
hingsmal
l
?”
Maat
lashr
ugged.“
Ithoughtsot
oo.
”
“Hegotsomet
hingmor
eexpensi
vet
hanhi
sown
car
.”
Maatl
asighed.“
Heisgoingt
omakesomeofuslook
bad,
tothinkEsi
hasbeencryi
ngf
oraMazdaAxel
a,
i
magineherseeingt
his.
.”

Peodr ankherj
uicewatchi
ngasKennycr i
edopeni
ng
thedoor st
oherbrandnewcart hensighedasthe
j
uicelostit
stast
e.Shelookedatherhusbandwho
wasbumpi ngshoulder
swithAronalaughingthen
l
ookedatMoesi whowast akingav i
deo,ahuge
smi
l
eonherf
ace.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#30

Lesangr ol
ledherey
eswatchingMoesi
’sl
i
fefeed,
shewat chedasKennystart
edherwhit
eJeep
Wrangler.Hereyeswentdowntothecomments.
Comment:Heel
angbat
hong,sotherear
emenl
i
ke
thi
soutt
herekanahei
stheonlyone?
Comment
:Ei
shJeso,
Iwi
shIwast
hatgi
rl
Comment:Ourt
eam keepwi
nni
ng,
yeswenagi
rl
,
Li
dashi
pi!
!
Comment:Allthefemalescomment i
nghere,Ihope
youkeepi
nmi ndthatthisgi
rli
sbeautif
ul,
kana
someofyouleboFi onawashr eksolebal
akaJeep
Wrangl
er,
haikake!Thatgir
lisbeaut
if
ulandshei s
well
deserv
ingofthatcar
Comment :Thatguykeenechai
rper
sonkomen
conf
erencebor r
akanayang?
Comment:
Ial
way
syear
nforsuhl
ovebathong,
kana
ther
ear
emenwHowil
ll
oveyouli
ket
his,
giveyou
ever
ythingy oumayev erwant ,
won’ tcheatandjust
bethatdr eam guy,theproblem iswel ove
generalizi
ngeverymenoutt hereasf emales,every
ti
mey ougeti nar el
ationship,youar eal
ready
i
nsecur e,youdon’tappreciateitwhenhedoes
somet hingforyoubecausey i
ut hinktheonlyreason
hedoesi ti
sbecausehei scheat ing.
Lesangclickedhertongueleavi
ngt heliv
efeedthen
scrol
ledthroughherFacebookt i
mel i
neforawhi l
e.
Shethought f
ull
ywentt oArona’
saccountt hen
scrol
leddown, Kennywashi sprofi
l
epi ctur
e.She
zoomedi nthepicturethenconti
nuedscr ol
li
ngdown
histi
meline.Heal wayspostedherandt hei
rvacati
on
pict
ures.Shecalledherfri
end.
“
Chomi
e…”
“
Ronaboughtt
hatl
i
ttl
egi
rlacar
,wai
tsehenev
er
l
ear
ns.
”
“Heelamma, Ioncebumpedintothem, t
hoset wo
arehappyandi nl
ove.Iusedt
ot hi
nkhel ovedyou
onlybutitseemshehasmov edon.It
’stimey ou
acceptyoulostadiamondchasingstones.Look
todayyouaresti
llwi
thDaniel
butassoonasthe
sparkdieddown,hestoppeddoi
ngthethi
ngshe
usedtodof ory
ou.”
“
Iam goi
ngt
ofi
ghtf
ormyman.
”
“
It
’stoolat
e.Heishappywi
thher
,thr
eeyearsdown
t
helineandhesti
ll
doswhatheusedtodoforherat
t
hebeginni
ng.I
fthati
snotl
ovethenIdon’
tknow
whatis.
”
Lesangr
oll
edherey
esbor
edt
henDani
elwal
kedi
n.
“
Fri
end,
Ihav
etogo.
”
“
Ok.By
e.”
Dani
ell
ookedatherasshehungup.
“
Hey
…”
“
Nehrr
awhenar
eyouget
ti
ngmeanewcar
?You
l
ongpr
omi
sedmeanewcar.”
“
What
’swr
ongwi
thy
ourcar
?”
“
Yousai
dyouwoul
dbuymeanewone.
”
“
Idon’
thavemoneyLesang.I
fyourcari
swor
king
j
ustf
inet
henyoudon’tneedanewone.Howcan
youwantanewcarwheny
ouwon’
tev
engi
vemea
chi
ld?
”
“
Iam notgi
vi
ngy
ouachi
l
dti
l
lyoumar
ryme.
”
“
Iam notdoi
ngt
hiswi
thy
ou.
”
Hewalkedtot
hebedroom andwal
kedsecondsl
ater
hol
dinghi
sphoneandcarkeys.
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“
Goi
ngoutf
orsomepeace.
”
“Imadeahugemi
stakewithy
ou.Ishoul
dhav
e
stay
edwit
hRona,
atleasthel
ovedme.”
Dani
elgrabbedbeerf
rom t
hef
ri
dget
henwal
kedout
.
“Gobacktohimthen.
”
Hejumpedinhiscaranddr ov
eout.Lesangpicked
herphoneagai
nthenwentbackt oMoesi ’
sli
fefeed
re-
watchi
ngasKennyst eppedoutoftheBMW t il
l
peopl
emov edexposi
ngt henewcar.Tearsfi
lledher
eyes,
sheswall
owedt hencall
edMoesi knowingthey
usedtobesocloseatsomepoi nt.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Heygi
rl
!”
“
Who’
sthi
s?”
“
Lesang.
”
“
Uhu,
hi.
”
“
Eishmma,
weshoul
ddoagett
oget
her
,beent
ime.
”
“
UhhnnaIam v
erybusyt
heseday
s.”
“
Real
ly?SomeandRonapar
ti
ngal
someansour
f
ri
endshi
pends?
”
“
No,whatyoudi
d,t
ryi
ngt ousemeasy ourpawnis
whatdest
roy
edourfr
iendhi
p.Idon’
tli
keassoci
ati
ng
wi
thtoxi
cpeopl
eLesang.”
“
Imadeami stake,Ir
eali
zei
tnow.Iam r
egr
ett
ing
mydeci
sionsEsi.Iwantmymanback.”
“
Hei
snol
ongery
ourman,
hei
sKenny
’sman.
”
“
Weusedt
obecl
ose.
”
“Ehh,
weusedtobecl
ose.Youar
eint
hepastnow.I
am busy
,by
e.”
Shehungupbef
oreLesangcoul
dsayany
thi
ng.
Attheparty,Kennysmiledstari
ngathercakeas
Aronastoodbesi deher.Shegottheknifesmil
ing
thencutitasmal lpi
ece.Sheputapi eceinsaucer
thentookaf orkandfedAr onafi
rstwhil
epeople
tookpict
ures.
“Speech!
”Someoneshout edi
nthecrowd.Kenny
smiledemoti
onall
yputti
ngthesaucerdownthena
tearrandown.Shewipeditaway.
“Thankyoubabe…f
oral
lthi
s.Idi
dn’
tthi
nky
ouwoul
d
dothis.
”
Moesi
smi
l
ed.“
Awwww…”
Ar
onal
eanedov
erandki
ssedher
.“Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Iloveyoutoo.Iloveyousomuchmor e.Uhand
t
hanky out
oev eryonewhoisher
e,Iam goi
ngto
missyoual
l butIwill
bebacksoon.
”
Moesiwalkedoversmil
ing.“Maatl
aandIalsogot
yousomethingj
ustthatwedidn’tgetamemot hat
wearegif
tinghugethi
ngslikeJeepWr angl
er
Rubi
cons,ifweknewwewoul dhavegotten
somet
hingl
i
keaG-
Wagon.
”
Everyonel
aughedthenMoesi
huggedKenny
.“Iam
goingtomissyou.
”
“
Met
oo.
”
“
Wegoty ousomet
hingsmal
l
.”Shegav
ehergif
t
v
oucher
.“Youcandosomeshoppi
ngwhil
ether
e.”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Atsi
leal
sowalkedovert
henlaughed.“
Ial
sodidn’
t
knowweweregi f
ti
ngbigthi
ngs,i
fIknew,Iwoul
d
havegott
enyoutheworld.
”
Kennyl
aughedthenAtsi
lehandedheragi
ftbag.
Kennyl
ookedinsi
dethensmiled.
“
Thanks.
”
Acoupl
emor epeopl
egavehersomepresent
sthen
Moesil
ookedattheDJhol
dinghergl
assofwine
andst
art
edsingi
ng.

Yeahy
eahy
eah
Yeahy
eahy
eah
Cheer
stot
hef
reaki
n’weekend
Idr
inkt
othat
,yeahy
eah
Ohl
ett
heJamesonsi
nki
n

Ev
ery
onerai
set
hei
rgl
assessi
ngi
ngwi
thherast
he
DJst
art
edpl
ayi
ngt
hesong.

Idr
inkt
othat
,yeahy
eah
Don’
tlett
hebast
ardsgety
adown
Tur
nitar
oundwi
thanot
herr
ound
Ther
e’spar
tyatt
hebar
Ever
ybodyputyourgl
assesupandIdr
inkt
othat
(y
eahyeahyeah)
Idr
inkt
othat(
yeahy
eahy
eah,
yeahy
eahy
eah)

*
**
Lat
erthatday,peopl
edi
sper
sedt
henMoesi
hugged
Kennyonelastti
me.
“
Behav
epl
ease…”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Iam al
way
sbehav
ing.
”
“
Iknowbutyouknowwi ththedist
ancecomes
t
emptat
ionsandthingsl
ikethat
…Ronal ov
esyouso
muchandIknowy oulov
ehi m.”
“
RonaandIwi
l
lbef
ineEsi
.”
“Ok.Il
oveyou.Iwi
l
lcal
lyou.Hasy
ourf
urni
tur
e
alr
eadywent?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Ok.”Esi
huggedheragai
nthenwal
kedt
othecar
wi
thherhusband.
PeohuggedKennyt
oo.“
Goodl
uck!
”
“
Thanks.
”
Dr
unkPeot
ookast
epback.“
Looksr
eal
l
ydopay
.”
Kennyf
rownedconf
used.“
What
?”
“
Ngng,
goodl
uckmma.
”
Shet ur
nedthenwal kedtothecar.Kennyhuggeda
fewmor epeoplewhi leRonachattedwi t
hhi s
brother
sandf ri
end.SecondslaterAt si
l
ewav edat
her.Shesmiledwav ingbackthent heyallgotinthei
r
carsanddrov eoff
.Ronaf i
nal
lywal kedtowar dsher
thenhepull
edherf orahotkiss.
“
Hey
…”
Kennyputherar
msonhi
sneckst
andi
ngonhert
oes.
“Thankyousomuch.
”
Helookedatthet
ime.“
Iam dr
ivi
ngyouinyourcar
,I
wi
ll
f l
yback.Whatti
medotheyneedyouatwork
t
omor r
ow?”
“
9.”
“
Weshoul
dleav
enow.
”
Heloadedherbagsi ntheRubicontogetherwit
hher
gi
ftswhileKennyputonhersneaker sthenwalked
outlocki
ngbehindher.Shejumpedi nthecarthen
Ronar ev
ersedoutintheRubiconandpr essedthe
gateremoteclosi
ngthegatedr i
vi
ngoff .
*
**

Peof
oldedherar
msasLebi
tsodr
ove.
“
Ilongaskedy outogetmeacar
,your
efusedbut
y
ouar et
hef i
rstoneinli
net
ohel
pRonapickacar
f
orhisgir
lf
ri
end.”
Lebitsolookedathiswi f
e.“Ididn’
trefusetogety ou
acarbutweagr eedwewoul dbuildourhousef i
rst
thengett othat,i
twasadeci sionwet ooktogether.I
am notRonaandRonai snotme, Ronabuyshis
gir
lf
riendacarwor t
hhundredt housands,that
’shis
choice,Imakedi ff
erentchoices.Stopcompar i
ngme
tomyf riend,youarepissi
ngmeof f
.Youcouldn’t
evenenj oythepartybecausey ouwer ebusybeing
j
ealous.”
“
Iwasn’
tbei
ngj
eal
ous.
”
“
Youwerebeingjeal
ous,y
ouaretheonyonewho
wasdri
nki
nglikeafi
sh.I
fyoufeelIcan’
tgi
veyou
t
heli
feyouneedandy ouneedamanwhowi l
lbuy
y
ouacar
,feel
freet
oleav
e.”
Tear
sfi
l
ledPeo’
sey
es.“
Whyar
eyout
alki
ngabout
l
eavi
ngme?”
Lebi
tsosi
ghed.“Isai
dify
ouwanttol
eaveformen
whocanbuyy ouacarwhenyoudemandforit
,feel
fr
ee.
”
Peol
ookedoutt
hrought
hewi
ndowsi
l
ent
ly.

*
**

Laterintheev eni
ng,Mothusisatout
sideonthe
ver
andawai t
ingforhiswife,
itwasaftert
ennowand
shest i
llwasn’tback.Hetookhisphonethencal
led
hersister.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Hi
,i
t’
sMot husi…Letsoisst
il
lnotbackhome,do
youhaveanyideawher eshemightbe?Shel
ongleft
i
nthemor ni
ngsay i
ngshewasat tendi
ngafr
iend’
s
babyshower.”
“Uh…letmecallaf
riend,
maybeshegotdr
unkand
passedout.Kanat
hisbabyshower
sareal
waysful
l
withal
cohol.
”
“
Ok,
thanky
ou.
”
Hersi
sterhungupt
henhesi
ghed.

Selet
so’
ssistersatupr
ightandcall
edLet
sobuther
numberwasn’ tgoi
ngthrough.Shesi
ghedthenher
husbandlookedather.
“
Whati
sit
?”
“
Lestoischeati
ng.Idon’tunder
standwhyshecan’
t
j
ustleav
et hepoorguyifsheknowsshedoesn’t
wanthim anymore.
”
“
Whatmakesy
ousayshei
scheat
ing?
”
“Babe,i
t’
swaypastt
enandshehasbeengonet
he
wholeday,i
t’
sal
mostmidni
ght
,wher
ecanshe
possibl
ybe?”
“
Eish…”
“
See?Idon’
tunder
standwhyshej
ustcan’
tdi
vor
ce
hi
m.”
“
Youwi
l
ltal
ktohert
omor
row.Let
’ssl
eep.
”
“
Letmesendheramessagef
ir
st.
”
Thesist
erqui
ckl
yty
pedamessagethenputt
he
phonedownandcuddl
edwi
thherhusbandsl
eepi
ng.

*
**

Acarstoppedatthegate,Mothusiqui
ckl
ygotup
t
henlookedatLetsosteppi
ngout .Hewal
kedovert
o
t
hegateast helav
ishcardrov
eof fwhi
leLet
so
wal
kedinsidethegate.
“
Whowast
hat
?”
“
Myf
ri
end.
”
Mot
husi
lookedather
.“Whi
chf
ri
end?
”
“
Youwoul
dn’
tknowher
.”
Shewal
kedinsi
dethehousethentookof
fherheel
s
whil
eMothusif
oll
owedaft
erher.
“
Iwaswor
ri
edabouty
ou.
”
“
Itol
dyouIwoul
dcomebackl
ateaker
e.”
Mot
husigotcl
osert
ohertoki
sshercatchi
ngt
he
mal
efragr
anceonher.Heswal
lowed.
“Canyoucal
lthefr
iendyouwerewit
h?Youare
smell
i
ngmalef r
agrance.Whowereyouwi
th”
“Iappli
editatthebabyshower .Itwasoneoft he
presents.BathongMot husiyouaresoinsecure,
it’
s
annoy i
ng.Ican’tbreathe, y
ousuffocat
eme.I t
’s
alwaysaccusat i
onaf t
eraccusat i
on.Maybewe
shouldjustdivorce.Leny al
olelamborahela.(This
mar r
iageisbor i
ngme. )”
Hel
ookedatherassheundr
essed.“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
It
’stoomuchnow.I
t’
sal
way
sani
ssueaf
teran
i
ssue.”
Shet ookever
ythi
ng,
hisdickj
erkedi
nhispant
sas
helookedathernakedness.I
thadbeenweekssi
nce
thelastti
meheldherinhisar
ms.
“
Iam sor
ry.Imi
ssedy
ou.
”
Hel
eanedov
erandki
ssedhersqueezi
ngherbr
east
.
Shepushedhi
m away
.
“
Iam t
ir
ed.Ihadal
ongday
.Wewi
l
ldot
omor
row.
”
“Comeon,
youhav
ebeensay
ingt
hatf
orawhi
l
e
now.”
“NnarraIam t
ir
ed.Ij
ustwantt
otakeashowerand
sleep.
”
Shewal kedtothebat hr
oom l
eav
inghi
m st
andi
ng
there.Herphoner angfr
om t
hebed,hewal
kedover
toitandanswer ed.
“
Hel
l
o?”
Amal
evoi
cespoke.“
Giv
etheownerherphone.
”
Sel
etsowal
kedov
erandsnat
chedherphone.
“
Whyar
eyout
ouchi
ngmyphone?
”
“
Whoi
sthat
?”
Sel
etsolookedthensighed.“
Myf r
iend’
shusband.I
nevert
ouchy ourphonesopleasestayawayfrom
myphonet oo.Thereisnopri
vacyinthi
shouseat
al
l.
”
Hesl
owl
ysatdownashi
skneesgotweakwhi
l
eshe
l
ockedher
sel
fint
hebat
hroom t
alki
ngonherphone.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#31

Thefollowi
ngmorning,Mot husi
satont hebed
watchingSelet
soapplyhermake- uptaki
nghertime
makingsureshelookedev enmor ebeauti
ful.
Minuteslat
ershegotupt henputonherbl ockheel
s.
Shepickedhersunglassesputti
ngthem on.
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ngagai
n?”
“Iam goi
ngtohavesomedrinkswithmysist
er,
akereyoudeci
dedtocal
lherlooki
ngformeasifI
toldyouIwaswit
hher.
”
“
Iwaswor
ri
edabouty
ou.
”
“Youareinsecureit
’sboring, doyouhav etocall
every
onebecausey oucan’ tgetholdofme?Next
ti
mey oumi ghtaswel l
call thepresident
.Nnawa
ntenahela(Youannoyme)becausey oudon’tgive
mespacet obreat
he,It
’slikeInowhav ecurfewasi f
Iam achild.WhenIdon’ tshowupatcer tainti
me
youcallmyent i
refamilymaki ngthem bel
ievestupi
d
thi
ngs.Whycan’
tyoujutwai
tformelikeot
hermen?
Inevercal
l
edyourfamil
ywhenevery
oucamehome
l
ate,whydoyoudoi t
?”
“
Youcal
lcomi
nghomeaf
tert
enj
ustcomi
nghome
l
ate?
”
“Iam notachil
d,Iam noty ourchildandIwillcome
whateverti
meImi ghtdecide.Waboul el
aandi t’
snot
evencute.Everyti
meIt hinkofcomi nghomekea
borega(Igetbored)becauseIknowIam goi ngt oa
housefullwit
haccusat i
onsandwhatnot s.You
behaveli
keani nsecurewoman.Real mendon’ tdo
l
ikeyoudo.Theywai tpat
ientlyathome.It’
sstay i
ng
athomedoi ngnothingthatmakesy oudoallthis.”
“OkSeletso,Iam sor
ryf
orgetti
ngworriedwhenI
couldn’
tgetholdofyou.Iam sorr
yforcall
i
ngyour
sist
ertoo.”
Shepi
ckedherhandbag.“
Iwi
l
lseey
oul
ater
.”
Hewatchedherwalkoutthensighedsi
tt
ing.Fora
momenthejustsatther
ethinki
ngofhisli
fethenhe
f
inal
l
ydraggedhimselftothebathr
oom wherehe
t
ookashoweranddr essedup.Hewokeuphi sson
t
henprepar
edhim.Minut
eslat
erhewal
kedoutof
t
hehouseandbuckl
edhissonuponhiscarseat
t
hendroveout
.

*
**

AtThabang’shouse,
Thabangopenedt
hedoorf
or
Mothusiyawning.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
Heshruggedwalki
nginsidethehouset
henputhi
s
sondown.“Sel
etsoischeati
ng.”
“
What
?”
“
Shei
scheat
ing.
”
Thabangsatdownst
ari
ngathi
m.“
Wit
hwho?
”
“Idon’
tknowbutsomeoner ich,hedroppedheroff
l
astnightinhislavi
shcarthenlatercal
ledher.I
pickedandmot hakawatengor udemogomaswe
(theguyisveryrude.
)Shedoesn’ tcar
e,shetalkst
o
mehowev ershewants.
”
“
Eish…”
“Iam thinki
ngdivorce.Iwant
edt ostar
tasmall
businessbutsincewear emar r
iedincommunit
yof
propertyIam goingtoputapauseont hat
.”
“Yeah…butt henmay bethisisyourchanceto
actuall
ygooutt hereandf indhappiness.Tobe
honesty ounev erreallyl
ov edthatwoman, you
mar r
iedherbecausey ouwer etry
ingtoconv i
nce
yourselfthatyouwer edoingther i
ghtf
ulthi
ng.It
wasn’tlov eandmay bey outhoughtyouwoul dlearn
howt olov eherbuti tneverhappened.Themar r
iage
wasj ustacompr omi se.
”
Mothusi
rubbedhi
sface.“
Imar
ri
edherbecauseI
wantedt
omakeherhappy.”
“Iguessshef i
nal
lyfoundonethatreall
ymakesher
happy.Kanawhenawomancheat s,shedoesn’ tjust
cheatthencomebackt ohermanandgoonasi f
nothi
nghappened, shedoesitwit
hemot i
ons.She
doesn’tcar
eany morethatiswhyshel et
shi m drop
heroffatthehousesheshar eswit
hy ou,that’
swhy
sheletshim cal
l.
”
“Ri
ghtnowsheleft,shesai
dshewentt
ohav esome
dri
nkswit
hhersisterbutIknowi
t’
sali
e,hersi
ster
goestochur
chev erySunday.
”
“It
hinkdivor
ceistheonlyway.Thecourtwil
ldi
vide
everyt
hingbetweenyoutwo.Shewill
probablyget
custodyofthechil
dsinceyouareal
wayst r
avel
li
ng.”
“Iqui
tthej
ob.Ihavebeenapplyi
ngwi
thmydi
ploma
andIwascall
edf orani
nter
view.
”
“Hopeful
l
yy ougeti
t.Youneedsomet
hingst
abl
e,t
he
courtwoulddemandtoseethat.
”
“
Iam j
ustpr
ayi
ngshedoesn’
tgi
vemehar
dti
mewi
th
mychi
ld.
”
Mothusi’
sphonerangfrom hi
spocket
.Hetooki
tout
watchi
nghissonplaywiththeTVremotet
hen
answeredLet
so’ssist
er’
scall
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hi,
isshethere?Iam tr
yingt
ocal
lherbutherphone
i
snotgoi
ngt hrough.
”
“
Appar
ent
lyshei
swi
thy
ou.
”
“
Huh?
”
“Shesai
dyoutwoaregoingoutf
ordr
inks.Shemust
havewentwi
thherboyf
ri
end.”
Hersi
stersi
ghed.“
Iam r
eal
l
ysor
ry.
”
“
It
’sok.Idon’tt
hinkshei
shappywithmeandIt
hink
i
t’
sti
mewej ustwentoursepar
ateway
s.”
“
Idon’
tknowwhathasgot
teni
ntoher
.”
“Whatev
eri
tis,i
twill
all
owbothofustogoour
separ
ateways.Tryhernumberl
ateri
fshedeci
des
tocomebackhome. ”
“
Ok.Ar
eyouok?
”
“
Yes.Iam good.
”
“
Ok,
bye.
”
ShehungupasThabangl
ookedathi
sfr
iendsadl
y.
“
Letmegety
ousomebeer
.”
“AhnoIam good.Idon’tl
i
kedri
nki
ngwhenIam wi
th
him.Wheni
sI t
ucomi ngback?
”
Thabangsmi
l
ed.“
Today
.Imi
ssedher
.”
Mot
husi
laughed.“
Thehousedoesf
eel
abi
tqui
et.
Youshoul
dmar
ryheri
fyour
eal
l
ylov
eher
.”
“
That
’st
hepl
an.
”

*
**

Latert
hatmor ni
ng,Kennyfini
shedwit
hher
breakf
astthenwentwithittothebedr
oom where
sheputitonthedressi
ngt abl
ethenki
ssedRona.He
openedhiseyesthensmiledstari
ngather
.
“
Hey
…”
Heki
ssedher
.“Ar
en’
tyousupposedt
obeatwor
k?”
Shelaughedsit
ti
ngbesidehi
m.”No,i
t’
sSunday.
Yester
daywheny ouaskedwhatti
meIwasgoi ngt
o
work,Idi
dn’
treali
zet
odaywouldbeSunday.”
Hechuckl
ed.“
Iwast
heconf
usedone.
”
“
Youar
est
il
ll
eav
ingt
oday
?”
“
Yeah,
myassi
stantal
readybookedt
het
icket
.”
Hepul
l
edheront
opofhi
m ki
ssi
nghert
henf
li
pped
heral
readypul
li
ngoutherpanti
es.Hetookouthi
s
di
ckpushingherthi
ghswideapartand…
.
Aronabreat
hedheav i
lyashi sthr
ustsquickened
whil
eKennylayonherf ront,herbuttsl
i
ght l
yarched.
Sheclosedhereyestightl
yspasmi ngaroundhis
di
ck.Aronadugdeepert henst i
ll
edinsi
def i
ll
i
ngher
upwithhisseeds.Hekissedherneckt hensl i
dout
andturnedheraroundmaki ngherrestherheadon
hi
schestexhausted.
Kenny’
sphoner angfrom hersi
deofthebedthen
Ronareachedforitandtheybothl
ookedatthe
unsav
ednumber .Heansweredthecall
putt
ingiton
l
oudspeaker.
“
Kenei
l
we…”
Amal
evoi
cespoke,
Kennyf
rowned.“
Who’
sthi
s?”
“Ihavebeenthi
nki
ng,It
hinkIshoul
dchar
gey
ouf
or
usingthephonewhil
edri
ving.
”
Ar
onachuckl
ed.“
Kenghelaoneosamocharge
mabane?(
Whycouldn’
tyouj
ustchar
geher
y
ester
day
?)Younowcal
lpeopl
e’
sphonest
ochar
ge
t
hem?Kenglet
lwael
amasepayana?
”
Ther
ewasapauseatt
heot
herendoft
hecal
l
.
“
Wrongnumber
…”
“
Otl
any
ela.
”
Thecophungupt
henRonal
ookedatKenny
.
“
Whydi
dyougi
vehi
myournumber
?”
“
Idi
dn’
t.
”
“
Thenwher
edi
dhegeti
t?Fr
om t
hesky
?”
“Heaskedf
ormyphoneunl
ocked,
Ithi
nkhepaged
himsel
f.
”
“Whyonear
thwoul
dyougi
vehi
my ourphone?What
busi
nessdi
dhehav
ewithy
ourphone?”
“Heaskedf orit,
Ithoughthewast akingit
.Babe
pleasedon’trui
nt hisday,Iam alr
eadysadt hatwe
arepar t
ing,kekopar esekar alwa(canwepl ease
notfight)Idon’
tgoar oundgi vi
ngmenmynumber .
”
Sheki ssedhim.“Iloveyou.Heaskedf ori
t,Ithought
hewast aki
ngit…Iam sor ry.Nextti
meIwi llnotgive
i
tov
er.Osekawangal
a(Don’
tgetangr
y.)
”
Hesighedt
hengav
eherbackt
hephone.“
Iam
sor
ry.
”
“
It
’sok.Youar
ejusthungr
y,Iwi
l
lfeedy
ou.
”
Shegotupf r
om thebedputtingonherni ghtdress.
Aronalookedatherbodyasshebentov erpicking
hersil
kgown.Shet ookhi
sbr eakfastf
rom t he
dressi
ngt abl
ethensatbesidehi m onthebedand
begunf eedi
nghim.Theychat tedlaughingwhi le
eati
ng,awhi l
elatershewalkedoutwi tht hetray.
Ronareachedf orhisphoneandanswer edan
i
ncomi ngcall.
“
Maat
la…”
“
Youar
ri
vedsaf
ely
?”
“
Yeah,
thecari
sabeast
.”
“Wenamonnay ouar
esetti
ngthebartoohi
ghf
or
someofus,kanaEsihasbeenwanti
ngaMazda,
Mazdahel
awaMazdaandnowKennygotaRubi con.
Imagi
newhat’
sgoingoninherhead.
”
Ronal
aughed.“
Iwant
edt
oact
ual
l
ybuyi
twhenshe
gr
aduat
edbutt
henIhav
eot
herpl
ansf
ort
hat
.”
“
Youboughti
twi
thal
oan?
”
“
Yeah…”
“
Howl
ongwi
l
lyoupayi
tfor
?”
“
Twoy
ear
s.”
“Youthi
nki
t’
sagoodi dea?Especi
all
yaf
terwhat
happenedwi
thLesang?”
“KennyisnotLesang.That’
sonet hi
ngIam sur
eof
,I
don’tgetwhyIcan’tspoi
lher.Sheisnotmyex.
”
“
Iguessy
ouareright,
kenghelaosamoi
mise?
(
Whycan’ty
oujustimpregnat
eher
?)”
Ronalookedatt
hedoor.“Theplani
sal
readyin
motion.Shei
sgoingt
oloseitbutshewil
lcalm
downbecausehelaaf
tergradat
ion,
Iam off
ici
all
y
cl
aimingher.
”
“
That
’smyboy
!”
“
Ial
readyt
oldpapa.Hei
sjustwai
ti
ngf
ormywor
d.”
Kennywal
kedbacki
n.“Babe,comeandhel
pme
movethef
urni
tur
ebeforeyouleav
e.Iwon’
tbeabl
e
t
odoi
tal
one.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hehungupt
henputonhi
spant
sandf
oll
owedher
.

*
**

Aft
erthechurchserv
ice,Tshenoloknockedonthe
past
or’sdoorthenwalkedin.Shesmiledasthe
past
orsmi l
edather.
“
Comei
nchi
l
d…comeandsi
t.
”
Shewalkedov
ert
hensl
owl
ysatdown.“
Good
aft
ernoon.
”
“
After
noonchil
d,Iam sor
ryf
ordel
ayi
ngyou,Iknow
y
oupr obabl
yhavethi
ngstodo,
assi
gnmentsto
f
ini
shup.YouareatUBr i
ght
?”
“
Yes.
”
“Verygood.Iwasspeaki
ngtomysonaf ewdays
back,Kgosi.Het
oldmehef oundhi
sfl
owerandhe
i
sr eadytotakei
tashisbuthewasn’
tsurehowt
o
approachitthoughhedi dsayGodwaspoi nti
nghi m
tothatflower.Thatf l
owerfort
unat elyisy ou.Iwant
youtoknowy ouar ef r
eetodenyt hispr oposal,we
areahouseofGod, andwedon’ tf
or ceGod’ s
chil
drenintorelati
onshipsormar r
iagebutIhav e
beenpr ayi
ngaboutt hi
sissuefortwoni ghtsnow
andIf eelt
hisunioni smeanttobe.Now, Iwanty ou
togohomeandt hinkaboutit,Kgosi doesn’ twantto
wastet i
medat ing,kanahei sgrowi ngol d.I
fy ou
wantandi fyouf eelthesame, thef amil
yi salready
standingby,readyf orthenegotiat
ionst obegi n.”
Tshenol
osmi
l
edsur
pri
sed.
“Sogohomeandt hi
nkabouti
t,wheny
oudecide,
youtal
ktoKgosi
,youbothcometoadeci
sionand
aler
tus.
”
“
Eer
ra.
”
“
Goodmychi
l
d,l
et’
spr
aybef
orey
oul
eav
e.”
Noloclosedherey
esasthepast
orpr
ayedthenshe
fi
nall
ywalkedoutunabl
etost
opsmil
ing.Shecoul
d
al
readyseehersel
fasMrs.Pi
l
ane.
*
**

Atthemall,
Mot husi walkedoutoft hehairsalon
holdi
nghisson,bot hoft hem wi t
hfreshhair
cuts.A
l
adysmi l
edstaringatt hem.Justl ookingathim
madeherhear tskip,itwasj usthowcut ehewasand
withhi
ssoni nhisar ms, theylookedsomuchal i
ke,
seemedthelooksdi dn’tescapehi sson.
“
Whenit’
sli
ket
his,
ther
eisnoneedf
orDNAt
est
s,he
l
ookssomuchli
keyou.
”
Mothusil
ookedatt
hel
adyandl
aughed.“
Hei
shi
s
f
ather’
sson.
”
“
Thi
siscut
e,kant
eJuni
ordoesn’
twantast
ep
mot
her?
”
Hewav edhi
shandashisr
ingshi
ned.“
Waai
,Juni
our
al
readyhasamother
.”
“
Somewomenar
eluckybat
hong.
”
Mothusil
aughedwalki
ngtohi
scar.Heputhisson
onhisseatt
henclosedhi
sdoorcatchi
ngaglimpse
ofSel
etsowithaman.Helookedatthem ki
ssi
ng
whil
ehol
dinghands,
hisheartpoundi
ngsomuchi t
coul
descapethenhewalkedoverbreat
hingheav
il
y.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#32

Seletso’sblushedasherboy f
riendkissedhert hen
shef rownedatt hefl
ashofacamer alight.She
turnedherheadandl ookedatMot husi whowas
takingmor epictur
es,herheartstart
edpoundi ngdo
fast.Heslidhisphoneinhispocketasshef aced
himt ogetherwithherboyfr
iend.
“
Sot
hisi
syoursi
ster
?”
Shelookedathi
m shaki
ng.Herboy
fri
endheldher
handandsqueezedit
,shesnat
cheditf
rom hi
m.
“
Heyuh…”
“Don’tbot
her .Iwil
lseey ouathome.Iam notgoi ng
togetinfi
ght swithy ouory ourboyfri
endwhenmy
sonisinthecar .Ini
ti
all
yIwant edt opunchy ou.”He
point
edatt heboy fr
iend.“ButIwi l
lseeyouincour t
whenIsuey ou.Theydi dn’
ttellyou?Youdon’ tdate
mar r
iedpeopl e.
”Mothusi l
ookedatherbar efinger
andchuckled.“ Ketl
agobonakocour tMister.(Iwi
ll
seey
oui
ncour
t.
)”
Heturnedandwal
kedaway ,
Selet
sowatchedhim
geti
nhiscarasaladywavedathimthenhedrove
away.Herboyf
ri
endlookedather.
“Youshoul
dtel
lhi
my ouwantadi
vorce.I
t’
s
point
lesst
okeephi
dingwhenheknowsthetr
uth.
”
“
Hei
sgoi
ngt
osuey
ouandembar
rassme.
”
“Wewi l
lsol
veitoutofcour t
.Heylookatme…”She
l
ookedathimt henheki ssedheragain.“Youdon’t
havetoworryabouthim.Iknewt heriskofwhatI
wasdoing,heisbit
terthat’
swhyhei ssui ng
becauseifi
tweresomeonewhor eal
l
yt hinks,he
wouldhaveknownt hatthismarri
agehasl ongbeen
over.
”
“
Peopl
ear
egoi
ngt
ojudgeme.
”
“Becausethat
’swhattheyal
waysdo.Peopl
ewi
l
l
alwaystal
k.It
’snot
hingnew.Let
’sgo.
”
Heheldherhandandl
edhert
ohi
scarwher
ethey
goti
nthenhedroveof
f.
*
**

Lebit
sowalkedf
rom hi
ski
tchenhol
dinghi
sbeer
thensatdown.
“KanteboRonabaaf for
dajangdiRubicon?(How
doesRonaaf for
daRubicon?)Yest
erdaymadam
wasangrygot wekeri
lekebatl
akoloi,
(sayingIsaidI
wantacar ,
)youdidn’
tgeti
tbutyouaret hefi
rstone
i
nl i
nehelpi
ngRonachooseacarf orhisgirl
fr
iend.
”
Atsi
lebur
stoutl
aughi
ngchoki
ngonhisbeer
.He
coughedafewti
mesasMaat l
ajoi
nedi
nlaughi
ng.
“Esi
didn’tsayany
thi
ng,
shehasbeenwanti
nga
smallcarandnowIfeelpr
essur
edtogeti
tforher
ASAP.”
Atsi
leshookhisheadlaughi
ng.“Soyouaret
hefi
rst
tohelpchooseanotherwomen’scaryety
oucan’
t
getheracar?Basadi!(
Women! )
”
Lebi
tsoshookhi
shead.“Shesleptangr
ylastnight
.
Honestl
yPeoandIagreedthatwewouldbuildour
housefi
rstt
hengetheracarbutyester
daythings
changed.
”
Maatlashrugged.“Maybeyoushouldgether
somethingsmallforthemeantime.Gapehel
aIget
whereshei scomingfrom,Esialsohasacar
,int
he
groupsheistheonlyonewi t
houtacar.”
“Whatareyougoingtodowi
thEsi
’
scaroncey
ou
buyheranotherone?
”
“
Sel
li
t.
”
“
Letmebuyi
t.
”
“Ok.Iam goi
ngtolookatafewcar
stomorr
ow,Iam
surebytheendoftheweekEsiwoul
dhavethenew
carthenIwil
lhanditov
er.
”
Atsi
l
elookedatthem.“Yout
hinkshewil
ll
ikeEsi
’
s
l
eftover
s?Justgetsomethi
ngnew,kenglele
ngameso?(Whyar eyousosti
ngy?)
”
Lebit
sot ookasi
pofhisbeer.“
Ourfi
naci
alsar
eti
ght
atthemomentbuty ouareri
ght.Wher
eisRona
getti
ngmoneyt obuyRubi
con?Kanakgangke
Rubicon.(Thei
ssueist
heRubicon.
)”
Maat
lachuckl
ed.“
Hemadeaf
ewi
nvest
ment
syear
s
backandnowt heyar
ebringinginr
esult
sandthe
busi
nessi sdoi
ngwell.KanaRonaknowsal otof
peopleandont opofthathei sapr
ivat
eaudit
or,
that
i
sbringi
nghi m moremoney .Hechargescr
azy
moneyf orthat
.”
Atsil
enodded.“Thebusi
nessisdoi
ngr
eal
l
ywel
l
.It
helpsthathehasalotofcont
acts.
”
“Youmeanwhenhesaidweshoul
dst
artabusi
ness
Imadeablunderandr
efused?
”
Maatl
anodded.“Ahugebl under.I
nvest
ingin
MotsamaiRealEstat
ewast hebestdecisi
onIhav e
evermadeandei t
herwayhisbusinessproposalwas
water
proof
.Soy eah,hecanaffordRubi
con.Ijust
hopeKennydoesn’tplaygames.”
Maat
la’
sphonev
ibr
ated,
het
ooki
tandst
art
ed
t
ypi
ng.
“Hewi
llki
l
lherifshetri
esit
.Personal
lyIwillnever
getmygir
lf
ri
endacar ,t
hisgenderist
ricky,
ev en
aft
ery
oudoal l
thatforhershemightst i
l
lcheat.
”
Lebit
sonodded.“
Youareri
ght
,thi
sti
mearoundhei
s
goingtoki
l
lsomeone.Thewayhealway
ssaysif
Kennycheat
shewil
lki
ll
herdoesn’
tsoundl
i
kej
oke.
Hopeful
l
yshecanbehaveher
sel
f.”
At
sil
elookedathisol
derbrot
herbusyonhi
sphone
wi
thafrown.HeturnedtoLebi
tsowhowasalso
st
ari
ngthenclear
edhisthr
oat.
“
Arey
oucheat
ing?
”
Maat
lal
ookedathi
m.“
What
?”
“Si
nceyoucamehere,
youhavebeenony
ourphone
ever
ytwominut
es.Youarecheat
ing.
”
Maat l
aputhisphonedownandr eachedforhisbeer
.
“Thereisthi
sgirl
…whenIwentf ormytri
p,Imether
atthatvil
l
ageIwasatandshe…shei spr
egnant.
Thatwasnott heplan.Iam tr
yingtogethertoabort
butwagana.( sheisref
using.
)”
Lebit
soshookhi
sheadsur
pri
sed.“
Youar
e
cheati
ng?
”
Atsi
l
eshookhishead.“
Ebi
l
eoi
misi
tse.(
Youev
en
gotherpr
egnant
,)
”
“
Itwasami
stake.
”
Lebi
tsoshookhi
shead.“
Ami
stakei
saonceof
f
thi
ng,your
sispuredi
srespect
.Howdoy
oucheaton
Esiaf
terever
ythi
ng?”
Maatlasighed.“
Imadeamistake,oneIgravely
regr
et.Iam aboutt
oloseev
erythi
ng,Idon’tneedbo
secondhandJesus.”
At
sil
elookedathi
sbr
other
.“Letmeseeher
.”
Maat
lar
eachedfori
sphonethenscrol
ledthrough
f
orawhil
ebefor
eshowingthem.Atsi
lesighed.
“
Shei
sbeaut
if
ulbutst
il
l…”
Lebit
solooked,hezoomedi nt
hepict
urest
ari
ngat
herface.“Shei
sbeauti
ful
,remindsmeofKenny
though.”
Maat
laf
rowned.“
Kenny
?”
“
Yeah…Imeanl
ookatt
hei
rsmi
l
es.
”
Atsi
l
eleanedoverandl
ookedt
henshookhi
shead.
“No…Idon’tr
eal
lyseei
t.
”
Lebi
tsozoomedinthepi
ctur
eevenmorestar
ingat
her,
heshruggedt
hengavebackthephonebr
ushing
i
toff.
“
Sowhatarey
ougoingt
odonowt
hatshei
s
r
efusi
ngt
oabort
?”
“
Iwanttogothere.Iam notgoi
ngt
oletthi
sdest
roy
mymarri
age.Ican’tl
oseMoesiandIknowshewill
l
eav
e.”
At
sil
e’
sphoner
ang,
her
eachedf
ori
tpi
cki
ng.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Hibabe,
Iam donedoingmyhai r
,canyouplease
comeandpi ckmeup.Iam withmysi st
er,
sheneeds
tobedroppedathomet henaft
erthatyoutakeme
tothebri
dalshower
.Iam alr
eadysuperlat
e.”
“
Laonedidn’
tIt
ell
youIwi
l
lbewat
chi
ngsoccer
t
oday?”
“At
sil
eIam t
ell
i
ngyougor
eIam l
ateal
ready
.Pl
ease
comeandgetme.”
“
Kekopaotsecabj
aakamongwelemongwehel
a.
(
Pleaset
akeacabj
ustl
ikeev
ery
oneel
se.
)”
“I
fyoudon’
twantj
ustsayso,
Iwi
l
lcal
lsomeonet
o
pi
ckmeup.”
“
Otsi
l
egoswaba.(
Youar
egoi
ngt
obesor
ry.
)”
Shehungupthenhel
ookedathi
sphoneannoy
ed
andtur
nedbacktot
hegame.
“
Gent
s,Iam comi
ng.
”
Maatlal
aughed.“
Weren’
tyounott
heonewhot
alked
aboutnotbei
ngcont
roll
edbyawoman?”
Atsi
lecl
i
ckedhi
stonguewal
ki
ngoutt
hengoti
nhi
s
caranddrov
eoff
.

*
**

Atsil
eparkedhi
scaratthesalon’sparki
nglot
,Laone
walkedoverwit
hanumbr el
laov erhead.At
sil
e
l
ookedathersisterasshegotinattheback,Laone
atthefr
onteat.
“
Heybabe…”
At
sil
elookedatherthenl
eanedov ertoki
ssher.She
movedherhead.“BabeIdon’twanttorui
nmy
makeup.Thati
smysi st
er,Boineel
o.Neel
othi
sismy
man.”
Atsi
lel
ookedatherthr
ought
hemi
rr
orasshe
noddedthenhedrov
eof f
.
“
Whoam Idr
oppi
ngof
ffi
rst
?”
Neelolookedatt heti
me.“Dr
opNeelobythebus
stop,shewi l
lgetabushome.Sheisgoi
ngto
Mochudi .Iam real
l
ylate,
youhav
etotakemet ot
he
party
.It’
sinBlock8.”
“Obatl
aaemamol et
satsi
ngle?(Youwanthert
o
standi
nthi
ssun?
)Andatthisti
mewhereisshe
supposedt
ogetabus?”
“
Thereisnot
hingwecandoaboutit.I
fshecan’
tget
abus,shewi
llgetpr
ivat
etr
anspor
t.
”
“
Iwi
l
ldr
opherof
f.
”
“
No.Dr
opherof
fbyt
hebusst
op.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hestoppedt
hecarbyt
hebusst
opt
henBoi
neel
o
st
eppedout.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
Hedroveoff,
hisf
ootont heaccel
erat
or.Laone
di
rectedhi
m,minutesl
aterheparkedinfrontoft
he
house.
“
Thanky
oubabe.
”
“
Yeah…”
Laonesteppedoutinherdr
essandheelsand
walkedinsi
dethegatewhil
ehedroveoff
,helooked
attheti
me.Thoughtful
ly
,hedrov
ebacktot hebus
stophehaddr oppedBoi
neel
oat.Hestoppedthecar
besideherthenpeopl
eranovert
othecar.
“
Mochudi
?”
“
Pil
ane?
”
“No.”Hesteppedoutoft
hecarast
hepeopl
e
steppedback.
“
Hey
,let
’sgo.
”
Boi
neel
olookedathi
m sur
pri
sed.“
Lal
asai
dyoucan
dr
opmeof f?
”
“
Yes.Let
’sgo.
”
Shewal
kedbehi
ndhi
m andgoti
natt
hebackwhi
l
e
hej
umpedi
nfr
owni
ng.
“
Whyar
eyousi
tt
edt
her
e?Youcansi
ther
einf
ront
.”
“
Rra?
”
Het
urnedandl
ookedather
.“Si
tatt
hef
rontseat
.”
Shel
ookeddown.“
Iam f
ineher
e.”
“Boi
neel
o,j
umpov
er.Ot
sabaeng?(
Whatar
eyou
scar
edof?)
”
“
Sepe.(
Not
hing.
)”
“
Thencomeandsi
tatt
hef
ront
.”
Shesteppedoutthesatonhersi
ster’
sseat.I
tfel
t
weir
dsitt
ingther
eandshecouldalreadyhearLaone
shouti
nginherhead.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Hestart
edthecaranddroveoffjoi
ningt
heroad.He
l
ookedathernoti
cingshehadn’tdoneherhai
ror
evennai
ls.
“
Whatwer
eyoudoi
ngatt
hesal
onwi
thy
oursi
ster
?”
“
Shewasgi
vi
ngmesomemoney
.”
“Kengosadi
ramor
ir
i?(
Whydi
dn’
tyoudoy
our
hair
?)”
“
Idon’
thav
emoney
.”
“
Howol
dar
eyou?
”
“
23.
”
“
Unempl
oyed?
”
“
Yes.
”
Henoddeddr
ivi
ng,
Awhil
elaterhepar
kedwher
eshe
hadpoi
ntedt
hensi
ghedt
akingoutafewmoney
not
esfr
om hi
swall
et.
“
Take,
goanddoy
ourhai
r.
”
Shelookedatatthemoneythenshookherhead.“
I
am sorr
yIcan’
ttakei
t.Youcangiveitt
oLala.
”
“No.Iam gi
vi
ngitt
oyou.I
fIwantedtogiveitt
oLal
a
Iwouldhavegi
venitt
oheral
ready.I
t’
sforyou.
”
“
Ican’
ttakemoneyf
rom mysi
ster
’sboy
fri
end.
”
Atsi
lelockedt
hedoors.“
Foryoutogo,youwi
l
lhav
e
totakethismoney
.It
’safri
endl
ygest
ure.”
Neelol
ookedathi
m.“
Idon’
twantt
obeaccusedof
t
hings.
”
“Youdon’thavet
obeaccusedofanythingi
fshe
doesn’tknowabouti
t.Takeit
,goandspoil
your
self
.
FixyourCV,appl
yforjobs.Dosomet
hingwithi
t.
”
“Whatdoyouwant?I
fyout
hinky
ouar
egoi
ngt
o
cheatonmysi
sterwi
th-
“
Hesmil
ed.“
Iam nott
hinki
ngofanyt
hing,
youar
ethe
onenowmakingmeoft hi
nkofi
t.
”
Shetookthemoneythenheunl
ockedt
hedoor
s.
Boi
neelosteppedout
.
“
Shedi
dn’
ttel
lyout
odr
opmeof
fdi
dshe?
”
Helookedatherwi
thasmilet
hendrov
eof fwi
thout
ananswer.Boi
neel
owatchedashi
scardroveoff,
shelookedatt
hemoneythenshov
editinherbra
andwalkedhome.

*
**
Lat
erthatdayKennywal
kedoutoft
heai
rpor
tgoing
tohercaratt
heparki
ngl
ottal
ki
ngonherphone.
“
Hej
ustl
eft
.Iwantt
ogohomeandcr
y.”
Moesi l
aughed.“That’
showIusedt ofeelli
ket he
fi
rstdayswhenMaat l
ausedt ogof orhi
st r
ips.This
onetimeebilekenekel elakehamosi maneant i
bela
areBabe,soobat lagot samayalenna?(Iwasev en
cryi
ngthenhel ookedatmesay ingbabe, soy ou
wanttogowi thme? )”
Kennylaughedget
ti
ngi
nhercar
.“Whatdi
dyou
say?”
“Yes, Isai
dy es, Iwantt ogowi thy ou.Hewas
l
eav ingthef ollowingday ,
whenhewokeup, he
foundmesi ttingwi thmybagr eadyt ogowi thhim.”
Shel aughed.“ Byt henitwasn’ tsof unnymma, Iwas
soser i
ous,kanal oratol emonat eKenny ,gojolago
monat e,(
datingi snice.)Iwasst illj
ustagirl
fri
end
then, kesetsekel eoriginalEsihela.(Iwasstil
l t
he
originalEsi.
)Het ookanhourt ryingtogetmet ostop
cryingwhi l
eont opofme, andwhent heycamet o
pickhi m up,kehankar enkalotlelalebati
ebeke
l
atlakey .(Ifeltli
kel ockingthedoor st hent hrowing
awayt hekey .
)Andt hat’swhenIgotpr egnant ,I
thoughti fIgotpr egnant ,t
hisni ggawoul dIdon’ t
know, quithisj obandst aywi t
hme, heonl ycame
after6mont hs, mpaet samay akae?Ebi leIhad
i
ntroducedmy selft ohismom, kanamot herin-l
awi s
thebest ,Ihadal readyi ntr
oducedmy selfandIwas
alr
eadyherf av ori
te.Hewassoexci t
ed, Igav ebirth,
hest ay edwi thmebutt hoset ri
psnev erstopped.
Fivey ear slatertotaIwassosur egor ethisone
won’ tmar rymeandIdi dn’twantt or aisethei ssue
becauseIdi dn’twanthi mt omar rymebecauseI
saidso.Ij ustwant edhimt omar rymebecausehe
want edt henhepr oposed.Youseej usthowni ce
l
ov eis?Don’ tcr ytoomuch, internshipwi llsoonbe
over, youcomeback, graduat eandy oust aywi th
yourman. ”
“
Yout
woar
esocut
e.”
“MaatlaandIcomef rom f
ar,
totaper
sonal
lyIdo
every
t hi
nginthebooktomakesur et
hatheishappy
becauseIlovehim somuch,kanakehelet
semogo
ene,(Ihaveputmyall i
nhi
m,)Il
eftnoroom f
or
disappoi
ntment
, Idon’tknowwhatIwi l
ldoifhe
wakesupanddeci destohurtme,KennyIwilldi
e.I
don’tknowbutlatelysomethinghasbeenoff.Iam
tryi
ngnottothi
nkmuchabouti tbutIam soscared,
I
foundmy sel
fprayingformymar ri
agetheotherday
becauseIam notr eadytobehurt.
”
“
Hewon’
t,
Maat
lal
ovesy
ou.
”
“
Youar
eri
ght
,Iam pr
obabl
yst
ressi
ngov
ernot
hing.
”
“
Ng…any
way
sletmedr
ivehome.
”
“
Yeswenat
heRubi
congi
rl
.”
“
Isti
l
lcan’
tbel
i
evei
t,Iam wai
ti
ngt
owakeupand
f
indi
tgone.
”
Moesil
aughed.“
It
’snot.Ebi
l
ewatrendaonsoci
al
medi
a.(Youaretr
endingnsoci
almedia.
)”
“
Iknow,Igotacal
lfr
om acousi
nthatIdon’
tev
en
t
alkt
o.”
“
Bal
oi!(
Wit
ches!
)Keept
hosef
araway
.”
“
Yeah,
mmaEsi
goshar
p.”
“
Okbaby
gir
l,byt
heway
,di
dyousetupy
ourhouse?
”
“
Yes,
Ronahel
pedme.
”
“
Atl
east
,heel
aKenny
,If
orgott
otel
lyou-
“
Kennyl
aughed.“
NgngEsi
mma,
wewi
l
ltal
kwhenI
gethome.
”
Esil
aughed.“Ok.Iwil
lcal
lyoui
ntwent
ymi
nut
es,
I
needtotel
lyouthis.
”
“Ok,Iam passi
ngbyt
heshopsf
ir
stkedi
reshoppi
ng
nyana.”
“
Anhourt
hen.
”
“
Yeah,
bye.
”
“
Bye.
”
Kennyconnect edherphonet otheBluetooth
speakerinthecarandpl ayedsomeofherf avori
te
Mar i
aCar eyhi
tsdr i
vingof f
.Shesangal onestopping
attheredt r
aff
iclightast womenf rom theothercar
l
ookedatherwhi temachi ne.Shesmi l
edshaki ngher
head, t
hecarwast heshit!Shetookoffassoonas
thetraff
icli
ghtturnedgr een.Minut
eslatershe
parkedatamal l
thenst eppedoutholdingherphone
andcar d.
Shewal kedi
nsidethemal lent
eri
ngashopand
start
eddoinghergroceryshopping.Awhi l
elatershe
pushedhercarttothetil
ls.Amancamei nf r
om
behindherhandingthecashierafewofhi sitems
l
etti
ngherbreatheinthatmal efr
agrancewhi le
breathi
ngsoft
lyonherneck.Herbodyt i
ngled.
Hesteppedbackspeaki
ngwi
thhi
sdeepv
oice.“
Iam
pay
ingforal
l.
”
Kennytur
nedandl ookedathim cat
chinghim
smil
ingather,
herheartskippedasshest aredatthe
si
nofaman, hehadanaught ysmil
et hathadher
smil
ingshyl
y.Hispresencescreamedal otofthi
ngs,
alotofsi
nfult
hingsshedidn’twanttotanglewith.
Shetookati
nystepback.“
I…”Hervoi
cef adedt
hen
sheclear
edhert
hroatandspokesoft
ly.“
Icanpay
formyown.”
Helookedatherasshebreat
hedal
it
tl
efastert
han
nor
mal thenputi
shandsonherwai
stmovingher
asi
de.“Iknow.
”
Heswipedfort
hegoodswhil
eanotherworkeri
nthe
shoppackedKenny
’sgr
ocer
yinplast
icsputt
ingi
t
backinhershoppi
ngcar
t.Shet
urnedt
ohi
m and
swall
owedstari
ngathi
m.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Heputhispl
ast
ici
nsi
dehercar
tthenpushedi
t
out
side.
“
Didy
ouwantt
odoany
thi
ngel
seher
e?”
Sheshookherhead.
“
Doy
ouhav
eacar
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Wher
ear
eyoupar
ked?
”
Shepoi
nted.“
Thatsi
de.
”
Shel
edhi
mtohercar
.
“
Shi
t!Wher
ethef
uckdi
dyougett
hisbeast
?”
Kennyunl
ockedhercar
.“I
twasapr
esent
.”
“
Thebari
sthatf
arup?
”
Kennysmil
edlooki
ngathi
mthenopenedherboot
.
“Thanky
ouforpayi
ngformyt
hings.
”
Hepl
acedev
ery
thi
ngofher
sint
heboott
hencl
osed
i
t.Helookedatherr
ighti
ntheey
eswithasmil
e
makinghersmil
eblushi
ngwonderi
ngwhathewas
smil
i
ngabout.
“
Iam Nat
hani
el,
Nat
e,y
ouar
e?”
“
Kenny
…Kenei
l
we.
”
“
Wher
eishe?
”
“
Gabor
one.
”
“Obat
angkwanoenealekwa?(
Whatar
eyoudoi
ng
her
ewhil
eheisther
e?)
”
“
Int
ernshi
p.”
“
Youar
enewher
e?”
“
Uhy
es.
”
Natesmi ledthenwal kedov erstandi
ngabr eath
from Kennywhi leherheartpounded.Shecoul d
breatheinhismi nttint
edbr eat
hcoat edwithahint
ofnicoti
ne.Nowwi t
hhisfragrancemi xedwithall
that,
hesmel tunique.Heleanedov ermuchcl oser
andwhi speredinherear ,
hisbear dtouchingher
neckwhi l
eherni ppleshardened.
“Hemadeahugemi stakelet
ti
ngyoucomehere
whil
eheremainedbehind,
ot i
l
egojewa.(Heis
goi
ngtolose.
)Wankut waKenny?(Youhearme
Kenny?
)”
Kennyheldherbreathbl inki ngacoupleofti
mes,he
steppedbackwi t
hasmi let henconfident
lywal
ked
tohiscarwhileshest oodt here,
kneesweak.She
gotinhercarsecondsl at erstari
ngatherhands
whichwer eshaki
ngt henputoneonherchest
feel
ingasherchestv ibratedduet oherhear
tbeati
ng
sof ast
.Sheswallowedf eel ingherwetpanti
esthen
putherlegstogetherpray ing.
“Fat
herIam happyi
nmyr elat
ionshi
p.Il
ovemy
boyfr
iend.Il
ovehi
m somuch.”Tearsfil
l
edherey
es.
“Hol
yghostf i
ret
otempt
ation.”
.
.
Goodmor
ning,
don'
tfor
gett
oli
keandcomment
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#33

Mot husi l
aidhissont osl eeplaterthatev eningthen
tookhi slaptopandst ar t
edty pi
nghi sbusi nessplan
i
nt hebedr oom.Sel etsosl owlyopenedt hebedroom
doort henwal kedin.Mot husi conti
nuedwi thwhathe
wasdoi ngonhi slapt
opwhi leshest oodt here
expect i
ngaconf r
ontat i
onorj ustsomet hingbuti t
nevercame.Shet ookof fhershoest henwentt ot he
bathroom wher eshet ookashower .Mi nuteslat
er ,
shewal kedoutwi that owel wrapedar oundherbody
thenlotionedandputonherni ghtdress.Shesaton
thebed.
“
Canwet
alk?
”
Hel
ookedather
.“Goahead.
”
“Iam sorr
y.Ij
usthav en’
tbeenhappyf orthelongest
ti
me.Tobehonestusget ti
ngmar r
iedwasami stake,
IlovedyousomuchIwaswi ll
i
ngt ostayevenify ou
didn’tl
ovemelikeIdid,Iwasr eadytodoev ery
thing
sot hatt
herel
ationshipworks.Butitwasnev erthat
casewi t
hyou.Youwer ewi thmebecausey oufel
t
youneededt obewi thme.Youmar ri
edmebecause
youf eltyouneededt omar r
ymeandIal soput
pressur eony ou.Threey earsl
ater
…nothinghas
changed.ThewayIwentonaboutt hisi
swr ong,I
admi t.Butthereisnothinglefti
nthismarri
age,can
wej ustpeacef ul
lypartway s?”
“
Youhadt
ocheatt
oreal
i
zey
ouwer
enothappy
?”
“No.IlongknewIwasn’ thappy.Iam sorr
yfor
cheating.Mot
husiIjustwanttogetoutoft hi
s
marriage.Kebat
ladivorce.(
Iwantadi vor
ce.)You
don’thavetohumil
iatemebef orewepar t.
”
“
Ok,
Iheary
ou.Letev
ery
onel
eav
ewi
tht
hei
rown.
”
“
Whatdoy
oumean?
”
“Imeanj ustthat.Yougowi t
hwhat ev eryoubought
foryourselforwhat ev
eryoudi dforyoursel
f,Ial
so
gowi t
hwhat everIboughtmy sel
f.It
’sfai
rthatway,I
will
forgetev entosuey ourboyfr
iend.”
Shelookedathi
m.“Wehavetodi
vi
deour
belongi
ngs,wear
emarr
iedincommuni
tyof
propert
y.”
“Youneverdi danythi
ng,Iboughtthishouse,I
boughtmypl ot
,mymoney ,allofi
t,mycar…wecan
divi
dethepr opert
yinsidethishousemmehel at he
resti
smi ne.Youwal koutwi thyourcareventhough
youdidn’tbuyjustthatit
’sinyourname.Iwill
not
botheryou.”
“
Youarecr
azy
,af
terthreeyear
sy ouexpectmet
o
wal
koutwi
thnot
hing,Iwastherewhen-“
“
Howmuchdidyoucontr
ibut
etoal
lthat
?Ibought
t
hosewi
thmyhardear
nedmoney.”
“That’
snotgoingtohappen.Youarecrazy.Ideserve
halfofever
ythi
ng!Thr
eey earsofmylif
eandy ou
expectmet owalkoutwit
hj ustacar
.Eventheot her
plotyouboughtandnevertoldme,it
’sgoi
ngt obe
divi
ded.”
“ThenIwil
lseeyouandyourboyf
ri
endincourtbut
thatwil
lbeaft
eryourpi
ctur
eswit
hyourboyfr
iend
areall
overTheVoiceNewspaper
.”
Shelookedathi
m shaki
ngwi
thanger
.“Whatdi
dIdo
toyou?”
“
Yousai
dyouwantadi
vor
ceSel
etso,
Iam r
eadyt
o
giv
eittoyouwit
houtanyhust
leaslongasy
ouwal
k
outwit
hwhat’
sy our
s.Whydoy ouwantust
odi
vi
de
thi
ngsyouneverbought
?”
Shegrabbedherphonethenangri
l
ywal
kedout
.She
pacedaroundhersi
tt
ingroom f
orawhi
let
henher
phonestart
edtori
ng.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
Iam athome.
”
Hersi
stersi
ghed.“
Whyar
eyoudoi
ngt
his?
”
“
Iam nothappy
,that
’swhy
!”
“I
fyouarenothappy
,youl
eav
e.Youdon’
thav
eto
cheat
.”
“Ihav
enotbeenhappyi nal
ongtimeandIam t
ir
ed
ofbeingst
rong.Iam t
ir
edofthi
smarri
age.
”
“Ihearyoubutdoy ouhavetocheat?Youcanjust
walkawaypeacef ul
ly.Youdon’
thavetohurthim.
Youhav edisappoi
ntedmet hi
stimearoundSeletso.
Ihopet henewguywi llmakeyouhappy.Kanathere
i
st hatexci
tementofsneakingaround…onceitfades,
i
tgetsbor i
ng.Somet imesl ovedoesn’
tcome
natur
all
y ,
peopl elear
nhowt oloveyouandIam
tel
li
ngy ou,thatlovel
astlongerthanthatofjust
fal
li
nginlov e.Youaregoi ngtoloseagoodmanand
youaregoi ngtogowi thy ournewflame,hopeful
ly
thatfl
amekeepsbur ning.Ithi
nkIhavesaiditall
,
bye.”
Hersi
sterhungupt
henshesatdowncal
l
ingher
boyf
ri
end.
“Hey
…whathappened?Shoul
dIcomeandpi
cky
ou
up?”
“No,hesayshewi l
lgivemet hedi
vorcepeaceful
lyi
f
ever
yonewal ksoutwi thhi
sown.Mostoft hethings
arei
nhi sname, whatIhavewi l
lonl
ybet hecar.I
fI
don’
tdot hat
, heisgoingtothecourttosuethen
humili
atemeonsoci almedia.”
“
Lethi
m haveit.Youwi
ll
startaf
reshandowny ours
t
oo.Heistr
yingtomakethingsdif
fi
cultforyou,at
t
hismomentIcan’taf
for
danyki ndofdrama, i
twil
l
messupwithmypr omot
ion.Lethim haveit
.”
“
Andwal
koutwi
thj
ustacar
?”
“Whatopti
ondowehav e?Hemightchargeupt o
P200K,Idon’
thavethatkindofmoneytojustthrow
away.Youhavetothinkformetoo.Lethim haveit
al
lornegoti
ateadeal.”
“
Hewon’
tli
stent
oit
.”
“Thenl
ethi
m haveit
.Wewi
l
lst
artaf
resht
oget
her
onacleangr
ound.”
Sel
etsonodded.“
Ok.
”
“Olebegaaledramat i
c.(
Heseemsdramat i
c.)Hei
s
goingtobeoneoft hosenoi
sybabydaddiesIcan
feeli
t.It
hinki
t’
salsobesthestay
swithhischil
d
thatwayhewon’tmakey ourl
iv
esmiserablewhen
wemov etoGabor
one.”
“Youareri
ght
.Iam j
ustsadthataf
tert
hreeyearsI
am walki
ngoutwit
hnothi
ngthoughIwast her
e
whenhewasst r
uggli
ng.Whenhehadnot hi
ngIwas
ther
eforhim.
”
“That’
swhypeoplegetmar ri
edoutofcommuni t
yof
propert
ytoavoidsuch.Thisshouldserveasa
l
essont oyou,
nexttimeaccumul ateyourown
propert
yandassets.Ifany
thingchanges,cal
lme.I
wi
l
lcomeandgety
ou,
gapeIal
readymi
ssy
ou.
”
Sel
etsobl
ushed.“
Imi
ssy
out
oo.
”
“
Ilov
eyouok?
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Herboyfr
iendhungupthenshewal kedbackt othe
bedroom andfoundhi
m busytypi
ngonhi slaptop.
Shetookapill
owandabl ankett
henwentt osleep
onthecouch.

*
**

Thef ol
l
owingmorningKennyheldherbraidsintoa
bunandl ai
ddownheredges.Sheputt hesmal l
toothbr
ushdownthenstaredatherselfi
nherlight
pinkbodyhuggi
nglongsleeveddress.Shelookedat
hercoll
ecti
onofheelst
henputont henude6i nch
heels.
“
OkKenny
,ti
met
ogo.
”
Shemov
edf
rom t
hemi
rr
ort
aki
ngagl
anceather
watchthenpi ckedherhandbagandwal kedtoher
kit
chenholdingherpi ll
s.Shel ookedatt hem
thoughtf
ull
y,Ronahadbeent al
kingaboutwant inga
chil
dforawhi le.Itwouldbeani cesur pr
isetoget
pregnantbutt henshedi dn’twantt obepr egnant
duri
nghergr aduat i
on,eitherway ,sofarsheknew
pregnancydidn’ tl
ookgoodonev eryone.She
couldn’
teveni magi nebeinghugeandugl yonher
graduati
onday .Shedrankapi l
lthenwal kedoutof
thehousehol dinganappl e.
Shelockedherhouseandgoti
nhercaranswer
ing
Rona’svi
deocall
.
Shesmi
l
edst
ari
ngathi
m.“
Babe…”
“
Hey
,ready
?”
Kennynodded.“
Ithi
nkt
houghIam ner
vous.
”
“Osekawat soga,(
Don’
tbescared,
)whenyouget
ther
e,walki
nwi t
hconfi
dence,
don’tbeaweakl
ing
anddon’tl
etthem t
akeadvant
ageofyoubecause
youareyoung.”
“
Siry
essi
r!
”
Hel
aughed.“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
“Thanks,putont
hewhi
tet
iewi
tht
henav
ybl
ue
str
ipes.
”
Hel
ookedathi
msel
fthennodded.“
Ok.
”
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
Ronasmi
l
ed.“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Letmego.Iwi
l
lcal
lyouwhenIset
tl
e.”
“
Ok,
remember
,you’
vegott
his.
”
“
Thanks.
”
Shedroppedthecallwit
hasmil
ethenst
art
edher
caranddroveoffheadedtowor
k.

*
**

Moesi t
houghtf
ull
ylookedatherhusband’
sphonein
thebedroom whil
eheat ehi
sbreakf
astinthe
kit
chen.Herheartski
ppedasitstar
tedri
nging,
she
l
ookedatt heunsavednumberforawhilethen
pi
cked.
“
Hel
l
o?”
Afemal
evoicespokeatt
heot
herendoft
hel
i
ne.
“
Uhhell
o?”
“
Whoi
sthi
s?”
“
Bof
elo.Whoam Ispeaki
ngt
o?”
“
Whodoy
ouwantt
ospeakt
o?Thi
sisMoesi
.”
Maatlawalkedint
henl ookedatherwi
thali
tt
le
pani
c,Esihandedhim hisphonethenputi
tonhis
earconf
used.
“Hel
lo?
..
.Whodoyouwanttospeakt
o?Modiri
?Nah,
wrongnumber
.Okbye.
”Hehungiupthenki
ssedher
chekasshesi
ghedwit
hrel
i
ef.
“
Iwi
l
lseey
oul
ater
,todayi
syourdayof
f?”
“
Yes.
”
Heki
ssedher
.“Iwi
l
lseey
oul
ater
.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Moesi
qui
ckl
yreachedf
orherphoneanddi
aledt
he
number ,hercr ammi ngski l
lswer etopnot ch.She
l
ookedati tf orawhi l
ewonder ingifreall
yitwasa
wrongnumber ?Shesav editthenwentonher
What sAppandsear chedfori t
.Sheopenedt he
number ’sDPandl ookedatt hebeaut i
fulwoman.
Shef rownedzoomi ngi nthepi ctur
ethenshookher
headbr ushingof fthet houghtbutf oundher sel
fback
atitzoomi ngint hepi ctur
eagai n.
Shecal
l
edKenny
.“Hey
…”
“
Kenny
,howol
disy
oursi
ster
?”
“
Mymot
her
’sdaught
er?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Uhhshei
s12i
fnot11.Iam notsur
e.”
“
Oh…Ij
ustcameacr
osswhosl
i
ght
lyl
ooksl
i
key
ou.
”
“UhIdon’
tknow.Sendt hepict
ure.May
beit
’smy
fat
her’
schi
ld.Al
lIknowi sthathewasamarri
edman
orsomethi
ngandhej ustimpregnat
edKef
il
wet hen
l
eft.
”
“
Iam sendi
ngy
out
hepi
ctur
e.”
“
Ok,
wher
edi
dyouseeher
?”
“
Uhthenumbercall
edMaat
la,
Iwantt
ocal
li
tand
f
indoutwhoi
tis.
”
“
Ok,
sendt
hepi
ctur
ethencal
l
.”
“
Ok.
”
Esit
ookascr eenshotoft
hepictur
eandsentitto
Kenny.Sheputherphonedownchoosi ngtot
rust
herhusband.God,whendidshestartwit
hthe
i
nsecuri
ti
es?Thatwasn’thersty
le.

*
**

Ar
onawal
kedi
nsi
dehi
sof
fi
cet
hensatdownashi
s
PAwal
kedi
n.
“
Mor
ningMr
.Mot
samai
…”
“Lelent
le,Iwantyout oor derfl
owersforKenny,she
i
si nMaunandt hisishercompany ’
sdetai
ls.
”He
handedherasmal l pi
eceofpaper .“Makesurethey
aredeliveredduri
ngl unchhourwithherlunch.Iwant
yout ofindacateringcompanywhi chcanprovide
herwi t
hl uncheveryday,notthesamet hi
ngev ery
day
andalsosomet
hingont
heheal
thsi
de,
shei
sona
di
et.
”
“
Yessi
r.
”
“Withthef
lowers,Iwantthem tobesentwitha
note…”Hegrabbedapenandast i
ckynotethen
wrotesomethingdownandhandedi ttoher
.“That
shouldbewrit
tenont henote.Pref
errabl
ygethera
bigbouquetofredroses.
”
Shereadt
henotet
hencoughed.Ar
onal
ookedather
wit
hasmile.“
Youwil
ldi
e.”
Shesmi
l
edembar
rassed.“
Iwi
l
lgett
oit
.”
“
Thanks.
”
“Mr.Gcal
ledandaskedifi
twaspossibl
efory
out
o
seehimthismorni
ng,hesaysheistr
avel
li
ngt
o
SouthAfr
ical
ateronandwon’tbeabl
etocomeat
thatt
ime.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
“
Iwi
l
llethi
m know.
”
Sheturnedandwalkedoutwhi
l
eheopenedhi
s
l
aptop.Lel
entl
esatdownonherdeskt
henanswer
ed
acal
lfr
om t
her
ecept
ion.
“
Apr
il
…”
“
Hey,someonecal
ledCandyi
sher
e.Shesay
sshe
want
stoseetheboss.
”
“
Candywho?
”
“
Mbaki
wa.
”
“
Hol
donl
etmeaskMr
.Mot
samai
.”
“
Ok.
”
Lel
ent
legotupt
henwal
kedi
nRona’
sof
fi
ce.
“
Sir
,aladynamedCandyMbaki
wai
sher
etosee
y
ou.”
Ar
onal
ookedathersur
pri
sed.“
Who?
”
“
CandyMbaki
wa.
”
“
Letheri
n.”
“
Ok.
”
Shewal
kedbackt
oherdeskandt
ookt
hephone.
“
Letheri
n.”
“
Ok.Howist heboss?KanaIhear
dgi
rl
fr
iendl
eftf
or
i
nter
nshi
p.”
“Shedid,Ij
ustgottoldtolookforacater
ing
companyt hatwil
lprovi
deherluncheveryday,
somethingdiff
erenteachday.Somewomenar e
l
ucky.Iam stil
lontheissueyaRubicon.”
Apri
lsi
ghed.“Idon’
tunder
standhowhecangether
Rubi
conwhilehedrivesj
ustaBMW.Andthatcari
s
madexpensive.”
“
Iknowbutthatj
ustgoesontoprovehowmuchhe
l
ovesher
.Someofusev enP5forthecombi
isan
i
ssue.
”
Abeauti
ful
col
oredladywal
kedov
er,
Lel
ent
leputt
he
phonedownsmili
ng.
“
Goodmor
ning,
youcangor
ightt
hrough.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Candywal
kedinthenLel
entl
egott
hephone.“
Whois
thi
s?whydoesshelookl
ikeshewi
llr
epl
aceKenny
?”
Apr
ill
aughed.“
Gonkgadr
ama!HAAAI
YE!
”
*
**

Candywal
kedinAr
ona’
soff
icethensmi
l
ed.He
l
ookedatherwi
thasmi
legett
ingup.
“
Str
anger
…”
Shelaughedwalki
ngov ert
ohi
mt henhuggedhi
m.
Theyheldeachotherforawhi
let
henCandystepped
backlocki
ngeyeswithhim.Hesmiled.
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
Candylaughed.“
Andy oul
ookdashi
ng.Icome
back!”Shel
ookedaroundhisof
fi
ce.“
Thisis
i
mpr essi
ve.
”
“
Arey
oubacknow?Forgood?
”
Shesmil
ednodding.“
Yes,i
nfl
esh.Ihavehad
enought
oJoburg,Imisshome.Imissedyou.
”
Hesmiled.“
Ekaeboy
fri
endy
agago?(
Wher
esi
your
boy
fri
end?)”
Shet
ookoutar
ingf
rom herhandbag.
“
Wow!
”
Shegi
ggl
ed.“
Iknow.
”
“
Wheni
sthebi
gday
?”
“
Ihav
en’
tgi
venhi
m ananswery
et?
”
“
Why
?Ar
eyouhappy
?”
Shel ookedathim andsighed.“Iam.Idon’
tknow,
may beit’
sjustt
hatIam ov erwhelmedbut…”She
sighed.“Idon’
tfeelwhatIthoughtIwouldfeelwhen
thishappened.”
“
Comeandsi
t.
”
Hesatwi
thheront
hecouch.“
Why
?”
Candyputherhandsonherf
acel
aughi
ngt
hen
l
ookedathim.
“Iam inlovewithsomeoneel se.It r
iedev erythi
ngt o
getoverit…didal lt
ricksinthebook, unfoll
owedhi m
onsoci almedia,deletedhisnumber ,Ievenst opped
my sel
ff r
om thinki
ngabouti tbut …”Sheshookher
headsadl y.“
It
’snotnor malandIf eel sosad, IwishI
canjustmov eon. ”Shesi ghedthensmi led.“But
that’
snotwhyIam her etoday.Iam l ookingforaj ob,
Isawt hereisanopeni ng.
”Shet ookoutherr esume
andhandedi
ttohi
m.

*
**

Kennywal
kedt
other
ecept
ionandsmi
l
ed
“
Hi,
mynamei
sKenei
l
weLoal
ang,
thei
nter
n.”
Therecept
ioni
stsmil
ed.“OhhiKeneil
we,uhhyou
needtogot ot
heHRbutshei snotinsoyouwi l
l
havetogotoMr .Bat
sil
e.Thatway,
thir
dfloor
,
seconddoortoyourl
eft.Heist
heboss.”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“It
houghtyouwer eacl
i
ent,
y ouaresopr
ett
yIcoul
d
haveneverthoughty
ouaretheint
ern.
”
Kennylaughed.“Thanky
ou.Seconddoort
omyl
eft
,
thi
rdf
loorright
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Okt
hanky
ou.
”
Kennywal
kedt
otheel
evat
ort
hengoti
nandsi
ghed
asitwhi
skedherup.Secondsl
atershest
eppedout
thenwal
kedtothedoorandknocked.
“
Comei
n!”
Sheopenedthedoort
henwalkedi
n.Shef
rozeatt
he
doorasthebossl
ookedather.
.
.
Likeandcommentaft
eryour
eadsowehav
ethe
foll
owingi
nser
tqui
ckl
y.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#34

Nater ol l
edhi schai randlookedatherwi thasmi l
e
l
eani ngbackonhi schair
,Kennyt ookadeepbr eath
thencl osedt hedoorf aci
nghi m, herhear tal
ready
poundi ngsomuchi tcouldleapf rom herchestand
walk.I twasn’ tjusthowsexyhel ookedbuthowhi s
presencescr eamedaut horit
y,command.I twasasi f
thewor l
dwashi sandhecoul ddoany t
hinghe
want edbecausehewasi ncharge.Andt hathaircut…
shebr eathedout …itmadehi ml ookev enmor e
sexierandt hatbear d.Lordthatbear d!She
swallowedhar dashesmi lednaught il
y,hisdirt
iness
refl
ect inginhi sey es.Herubbedhi shandst ogether
slowlyundr essingherwi thhisey es,hewassur ely
thety pet opushheragai nsthist ableandt ake
what ’
shi sthenl eaveherdr i
ppingwi thhiscum.Fuck,
hewasamachoman!
Hergui
l
tconsci
oussnappedheroutofi
tthenshe
wal
kedoversl
owly
,herheel
sechoingwi
theachstep
shetookwhileherhipsswayedf
rom si
detosidei
n
herkneelengthbodyhuggi
ngdresst
hatexposed
herpearshapedfigure.
Shecl
earedherthroat
.“Goodmor ni
ng,mynameis
Kenei
l
weLaolang,thenewi nt
ern.Iwasdir
ect
edto
thi
soff
icebytherecepti
oni
statthegroundfl
oor
.”
Hechuckl
edbit
inghi
slowerl
i
pthenmot
ionedshe
sat
.“Youcansi
t,MsLaol
angri
ght
?”
“
Yessi
r.
”
Sheslowlysatdownstari
ngathim.Hesmil
ed
makinghersmi l
etoobutofcauseshewasvowi
ng
tokeepitprof
essional
.
“Iam Mr.Bat
sil
e,Iownthi
spl acethoughIam r
arel
y
here,
myassistantrunsi
t,Mr.Ndlovubutheisnoti
n
today,
hewentf oraworkshopi nGaborone.
”
Kennynodded.“
Ok.
”
Hel ookedather,shedidn’thavethatmuchmake- up
onandhecoul dseeal lthatfl
awlesssmoot hbeauty
thatsatinf
rontofhim.Hel ookedinherey esthen
satproperl
ytryi
ngt ogetagr i
pofhi msel
f.“Youcan
t
ell
meabi
tabouty
our
sel
f.
”
Shetol
dhim abi
tabouther
sel
fashewat
chedher
i
ntent
ly.
“
That
’sal
l
.”
“
Ok,
youar
egoi
ngt
obewor
kingwi
th-
“
Thedooropenedthenaladywal
kedi
n.Kenei
l
we
l
ookedatherthenbackathim.
“
Thi
sisMr
.Ndl
ovu’
sassi
stant
,Wapel
ori
ght
?”
“
Yessi
r.
”
“Wapel
o,pleaseshowMsLaolangherworkstati
on
andhersupervi
ser.May
bealsoshowheraround.
Sheisi
snewar oundhere.
”
“
Yessi
r.
”
Kennystoodup.“
Thankyouf
ort
hisoppot
uini
ty,
I
l
ookforwardtoworki
ngandl
ear
ningf
rom t
his
company.”
Natestoodupandstret
chedhishand.Kenny
str
etchedherst
oothenhegaveherfir
m handshake.
“Welookforwar
dtohavingyoutoo.
”
Wapel owal
kedoutasNatelookedinKenny
’seyes
holdi
ngherhand.Heletgoasgoosebumbps
eruptedonherski
nthensheturnedandqui
ckl
y
walkedoutasifshewasrunni
ngawayf r
om
somet hi
ngi
nthatoff
ice.
Wapel
olookedatKenny
.“Hi
,Wapel
o.You?
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Kennyf
orKenei
l
we.
”
Wapelosmi
led.“
Ioncehadafri
endbacki
npr
imar
y,
hernamewasKeneil
we.Anywayscome…”
Theywal
kedsi
debysi
dechat
ti
ng.
“
Sowher
ear
eyouf
rom?
”
“
ShakawebutIam st
udy
ingatGabs.
”
“
Icanseet
hatt
hisgl
owi
snott
heoneIam usedt
o.”
Theybot
hlaughed.“
Aowmma.
.”
“Iam t
ell
ingyou.Yoursupervi
sori
sMsEdwar ds,y
ou
aresoluckysheistaki
ngy ouundeherwing.Shei
s
goodatwhatshedoesmmeost r
ictny
ana.
”
Theywalkedt
oanof f
icethenWapeloknocked
gent
lyonthedoorbefor
ewal ki
ngi
n.
“
MsEdwar ds,ket
isi
tseint
ern.(
Ihav
ebr
oughtt
he
i
nter
n.)Kenei
l
weLaol ang.
”
MsEdwardsr
aisedherheadt
hensmi
l
edst
ari
ngat
Kenny
.“Oh…wow!Whatabeauty!
”
“
Eh,
Kenny
,wewi
l
ltal
k.Goodl
uck.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
MsEdwar
dslookedatherwit
hafr
iendlysmil
e.“
Hi,
soasy
oucansee,yourdeski
sov
ert here.
”
Kennyl
ookedatherdeskandnodded.
“Thi
sisnowourof f
iceandyouandIar
eateam.You
canputyourt
hingsdownt henIwi
l
lbri
efy
ouon
what’
sgoingon.”

*
**

I
nGabr
one,
Ronal
ookedatCandywi
thasmi
l
e.
“Iam real
lysor
ryIcan’
tofferyouanyt
hingherebut
thatguy,heisgoi
ngtohirey oust
rai
ghtaway.We
arecloseandhewi l
lof
fery ousomuch.”
Candysmi
l
ed.“
Iunder
stand.
”
“
Youdo?
”
“Ido.IfIwereyourgi
rl
fr
iendtooIwouldn’
tbereall
y
comf ort
ablewit
hthesetup.Youmustbet he
chair
personkomenconf erence.Youarewhatevery
guyshoul dbe.
”
Ronal
aughed.“
Kennachai
rper
sonwabone.
”
Shsmil
edthenpickedherhandbag.“
IhopeKenny
knowshowluckysheistohaveyou.Menli
keyou
arer
aretof
ind.
”
“
Iam t
heonewho’
slucky
.”
Shesi
ghed.“
Letmegoandgetmyj
ob.
”
“
Ok.Byt
heway…maybeyoushouldsayyes,why
wast
eti
meonsomet
hingthatcanneverbe?
”
Candyl
ookedathi
m.“
Yout
hink?
”
“Yeah…sometimesweblockourownhappiness.
Whydon’tyoulethi
mlov
ey ou?It
’sbeenwhat?
Threeyear
s.”
“
Yeah.
”
“Youshouldsayy es.Youpr obablylovehi
m buty
ou
arehol
dingbackbecauseoft hi
sotherguybutwhat
i
fwhaty ouar ehopingfornev erhappens?Youare
i
nar el
ationshipwithyourselfkana,youareal
onein
thi
srace.”
Shenodded.“
Yeah…”
“
Goodl
uck.
”
“
Thanksbestf
ri
end.Kanay
ouar
emyonl
yfr
iend.
”
Helaughedt
henopenedt
hedoorf
orher
.“Because
youareawkwar
dlewena.
”
Candylaughed.“
Iam t
hemostnicestpersonout
ther
e.Butanyways,
thanksf
ort
het al
k.Ineededto
hearthat
.”
Shebriefl
yhuggedhi
mt henwal
kedoutj
ustasAt
sil
e
walkedin.Hesmil
edstari
ngatCandy
.
“
Hi…”
“
Hel
l
o!”
Shewal
kedawayt
henRonaf
acedhi
sbr
other
.
“
What
’sshedoi
ngher
e?”
“
Shecamet
oseeme.Obat
lang?(
Whatdoy
ou
want
?)”
“Wehaveameeti
ngwit
hthosetwoguys,
theyare
al
readywai
ti
ngf
orus.Warewhatwasshedoing
here?
”
Ronawalkedbacki
nhi
sof
fi
cet
hengr
abbedaf
il
e.
“Shewassayi
nghi.
”
Hest
oppedbyApr
il
’sdesk.“
Wheni
sMr
.Gcomi
ng?
”
“
Inanhour
.”
“
Ok.
”
Hewalkedtotheboar
droom,Asti
l
ebyhi ssi
de.“
So
shecameallt
hewayf r
om wherevershest
aystosay
hial
ldr
essedup?
“
Yeah,
Candyi
saf
ri
end.
”
“
That
’showi
tst
art
s.”
“
Notev
ery
onecheat
s.”
“Maatl
aischeat
ing,
Inev
ert
houghthewoul
dcheat
buther
ewear e.
”
Ronaf
rowned.“
What
?”
“Heischeati
ngandev
engott
hatsomeone
pregnant
.”
“
Wai
t…what
?”
“
Yes.Whoknewhewoul
dev
ercheatonEsi
?”
Theywalkedi
nsi
detheboar
droom wher
ethet
wo
gent
lemenwhere.
“
Gent
lemen,
sor
ryf
orbei
ngl
ate.
”
“
It
’sok.Ler
onawej
ustar
ri
ved.
”
Theyallshookhandst
hensatdownast
hemeet
ing
st
arted.

*
**

Mot
husiwal
kedoutofhi
sint
ervi
ewwi t
hasmi
le
t
hengoti
nhiscaranddr
oveoffdi
ali
nganumber
.
“
Mot
husi
…”
“
Hi,
so?
”
“
Ifsheagr
eest
owal
koutwi
thwhat
’sher
s,Iwi
l
l
dr
awupthedocumentsandal
lwewi
l
lneedf
rom her
i
stosi
gnthedocuments.
”
“Okbutshemayr efuse,Icaughtherwi
thher
boy f
riend.Isentyout hepict
ures.I
ncaseshe
refusest heini
ti
alagreement ,
Iwanttosueher
boy f
riend.Ididmyr esearchonhim andIknowhe
woul dn’twantthi
stogov ir
al,
hehasanimageto
protect.”
“
Ok,
planbsoundst
ight
.”
“
Kebat
laP150K.
”
“
Ok.No,
ret
labua.(
Wewi
l
ltal
k.)
”
“
Sur
elai
taka.
”
Hehungupdr
ivi
nghome.

*
**

Athishouse,hewal
kedi
nandl
ookedatt
henanny
feedi
nghischil
d.
“
Daddy
!”
“
Bigguy
!”
Hepickedhim upt henthr
ewhi mt heair
.Hisson
l
aughedashecaughthi m.Seletsowalkedoutfrom
thebedroom draggingherbag.Mot husihandedthe
chil
dbacktot henannyandl ookedather .
“
Iam l
eav
ing.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shet earf
ullylookedathi m.“ Iam goi ngt owal kaway
withjustmycarandcl ot hesbecauseIdon’ twant
dramabutknowy ourobbedmeofwhatIdeser ved.I
waswi t
hy ouwheny ouhadnot hing,Ifoundy ou
sleepingonamat tr
ess.Igoty out hatbedy ouwer e
sleepingon, Iboughty oumostt hings,ev enclothes.
IdiditallbecauseIl ov edy ou.Youbr oughtKennyt o
ourhouse, Ikeptquietandr atherf or
gav eyou, I
foughtdayandni ghtf ort hi
sr elationship,
somet imesi tgotsomuchi tf eltlikeIwasf i
ghting
alone.Istoodbyy oursi dewheny outranspor t
ed
Mar k’
sdr ugs, pr
ayedf ory oursaf etydayandni ght.I
stoodbyy ounomat terwhatbecauseIl ovedy ou.
Notadayhav eIev erlookeddownony ou,notaday
haveIev erlef
ty ourside.Iadmit,Ishouldhav ejust
l
eftinsteadofcheat ingbutthepuni shmenty ouar e
gi
vingmef orthatist oomuch.Youar eexpectinga
fi
ghtfrom mebuti t’
snotgoi ngtocome.Iwi llget
myownt hings,youhav etaughtmeagr eatlesson
i
ndeed, oneIwi shIknewbef oreIgotmar r
iedt oy ou.
Youwi l
l r
emai nwithoursonandIwi l
lgethim on
holi
days.Iam notgoi ngtofi
ghty ou.”
Shedraggedherbagthenwal
kedovert
oherson
andtookhim.Shehel
dhiminherarmsforawhil
e
ki
ssinghi
sforeheadt
henfi
nal
lygav
ehim backand
walkedout.

*
**

Aroundlunchti
me, Moesilookedatherphonethen
forawhilethentookitandcalledBofel
owi t
ha
pri
v at
enumberwhi l
eherhear tpounded.She
l
istenedasthephoner ang,herthr
oatdryi
ng.
“
Hel
l
o?”
Shetookadeepbr eat
h.“Hi
,mynamei sSet
ho,Iam
cal
li
ngfrom Bokamosohospital
,wewouldl
iket
o
knowifbyanychancey ouknowamannamed
Maatl
aMot samaiandwhoar eyoutohim?”
Bof
elowasqui
etf
orawhi
l
e.“
Uhhno.Idon’
tknow
hi
m.”
Moesisi
ghed.“
Youdon’tknowhi
m?Buty
our
numberi
sinhisphone.
”
“
No,
Idon’
tknowhi
m,Iam sor
ry.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
Moesi hungupt
henputherhandsoverherface
l
aughing.Howcoul
dsheev enthi
nkhewascheat i
ng?
ThiswasherMaatl
a.Nowsheev enfel
tguil
tyfor
suspecti
nghim.

*
**

Lat
erthatdayKennywalkedoutofthecompany
hol
dingahugebouquetofredroseswal ki
ngtoher
car
.Sheunlockedhercarfr
om adistance.She
openedt hepassengerdoorthenputherhandbag
andf l
owersont heseat.Sheclosedt hedoorthen
walkedtot hedri
ver
’sdoor.Shest artedhercar,
Nate
walkedov erandopenedherdoort henputonher
seatbelt
.
“
Wakaeosar
wal
aseat
bel
t?Obat
agoswa?
”
Kennyblushedashebreat
hedonhert hensmil
ed
andwalkedawayleav
inghisfr
agrancesmell
ingin
hercar
.Shesighedcl
osingherey
es.
“
Godpl
ease….
”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#35

Maat
lagoti
nhi
scardi
ali
nganumber
.
“
Whatdoy
ouwantMaat
la?
”
“
Didshecal
l
?”
“Ican’
tbel
iev
eyoul
iedt
ome.Youtol
dmeyouwere
notmarri
edandnowall
ofasuddeny
ouar
emarr
ied
withki
ds.”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Ibrokeupwit
hmyboy f
ri
endfory
ou.Whyuseme
whenyouknowyouarehappi
l
ymar r
ied?Nehr
ra
whatdi
dIdotodeser
vesuch?”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“Iam notabort
ingmychi l
d.Ifyoudon’twantt
obe
partofthi
spregnancy ,
fine,yourchoi
ce.Iam not
goingtokil
lmychild.Thischi l
ddidnothingwrong.
Youknewy ouwer emar riedandy ourefusedt
ousea
condom.Iam notgoi ngt oletyoupunishmychi l
d.”
“
Bof
elo-
“
“Andstopcalli
ngme.Focusony ourwif
eand
chil
dren.I
twillbel
ikeyouandInev ermet,
Iam
goingtoforgetyoueverexi
sted.Blockmynumber
,
delet
eit,whatever
.”
“Iam comi
ngt
here.Idon’
twanttoabandonany
chil
dwhoismine.Fel
oplease…”
“Idon’
tcareaboutwhatyouwanttodobutIam not
goingtoabortmybabyMaat l
a.Youliedtome
knowingly
,Isti
l
lcan’
tbeli
eveIfel
lforyourl
i
es.Iam
hurtbutIam goingt
opickmyselfup.”
“CanIcomet
her
esowecant
alk?Keagokopa.(
I
am beggi
ngy
ou.
)”
“No.Iam mov i
ngfrom thi
spl ace,obatlagolwa
l
enna.( Youwantt ofightwithme.)Iam noti nthe
mood.Iam mov ingaway ,Iam goingsomewher efar
fr
om y ou.Ihavehadi tandIam t i
redofit.Iam not
kil
li
ngmychi ld.Iam notgoingt oev enwrit
ey our
nameonhi sorherbi r
thcerti
ficat
e.Pleaseleaveme
alone.Gobackt oy ourwifeandki ds.Iam changing
mynumber .
”
“
Youcan’
trunawayf
rom me,
Iwi
l
lfi
ndy
ou.
”
“
TryMaat
laMot
samai
,youcanonl
ytr
y.”
Shehungup.Heputhishandsonhisfacefrustr
ated,
heknewhowitfeltt
ogrowupwi t
houtafatherand
growi
nguphehadpr omisedhi
mselfhewoul d
al
waysbethereforhi
skidsnomatterwhatbutthere
hewas…
Hestar
tedthecaranddrovehomewonder i
nghow
hewasjustgoi
ngtotellEsi
,i
fhedidn’
ttel
lhernowi
t
meantonedayshewoul dfi
ndoutandthatwould
pr
obablyendhi
smar r
iage.
Minut esl aterhedrov einhi syardthenpar kedhi scar
besi deEsi ’ssmal
l carandsatst i
llforawhi letryi
ng
tofigur eoutwhatt odo.Hel ookedathi sr ing
recal l
ingt hedaytheyf i
rstmetdownt ot hedayt hey
gotmar r
ied.Hef i
nal l
yst eppedout .Hewal ked
i
nsi det hehouseandwasi mmedi atelymetwi t
ha
deliciousar oma.Esi walkedf r
om theki tchenwi t
ha
smi le.Hesmi l
edst aringather ,t
hatwast hel oveof
hislifeandhewasn’ taboutt oloseher .Nott oan
affair,therewouldn’ tbeacomebackf rom t hat.He
wal
kedov
erandki
ssedher
.
“
Hey
…”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Hi…Imi
ssedy
ou.
”
Hekissedherpicki
ngherupandpl acedheronthe
kit
chencounter
s.Heki ssedherhardert
aki
ngouthis
weaponfrom hi
spant swhilesl
idi
ngherpanti
esto
thesidet
hen#remov ed.
.
Ont hesitti
ngr oom floor,Esimoanedsoftlyasher
husbandbr eathedheav i
lyonherservingherdeep
faststrokest hathadherbodyst if
feningwitheach
thrustashet ookherst r
aighttoheaven.She
moaneder upt i
ng,herorgasm hit
ti
nghersi deways.
Herl egsshookwi t
hherey escl
osedwhi l
eshe
moanedl oudly.
Maat l
agruntedli
keaninj
uredbullinherearthen
shothisloaddeepinsi
deherashi sweaponj erked
rel
easing.Helookedatherthenkissedherandsl i
d
out.Esismiledashegotupst ar
ingather,i
twas
thatl
ookt hatal
waysmanagedt oweakenher .
Hehel
pedherupascum dr
ippeddownherl
egs.He
gav
eherasoftki
ssonherl
ips.
“
Iam goi
ngt
ochange.
”
Shebl
ushed.“
Ok.
”
Het urnedandwal kedtot hebedr oom leav
ingher
withast upidgrinonherf ace.Whydi ditsti
ll
feel l
i
ke
thi
s?Wasi tjustherwhost il
lfel
tv er
ymuchi nl ove
withthesameper sonev enaf t
ersomanyy ears?She
walkedt othekitchenandpi ckedherdr essand
panties.Shewi pedher selfwithherpant yt
henput
onherdr essgoi ngt othebedr oom.Sheputher
pantiesinthewashi ngbasketl i
steni
ngt ohimt akea
showert henwal kedoutt odishforhim.Herphone
rangasshef ini
sheddi shing,shesmi ledstar
ingat
thecaller.
“
Hey
,howwasi
t?”
Kennysighed.“I
twasok.Ili
kemysupervi
sor
,It
hink
wearegoingt obegoodpartner
s.Shei
sso
det
erminedandf ocused.
”
“
That
’sgood.
”
“
Ial
somett
heboss.
”
“
Howi
she?
”
“Esi
,doy ouev
erf
indot
hermenexpectMaat
la
attr
act
ive?”
Esismil
edthenlookedatthepassageandsighed.
“Well
yes,Iam humanafteral
l.Iam notar
obot.
Honestl
yIlovemyhusbandbutIam notblind.
”
“
Everl
i
ke…haddi
rt
ythought
saboutot
hermen?
”
“Yeah…it’
snature.Thereisat i
mewher eeyescan
wonderaroundt henyoufi
ndy oursel
fimagini
ng
dir
tythi
ngsbutt hatdoesn’tmeanIdon’tlovemy
husband.Itsi
mpl ymeansIam al sohumanbutIcan
control
my sel
f.Iam notgoi ngtoactonthose
thoughtsoranything.Whathappened?Youcant el
l
me.”
“Imetamany esterday.Esihei
sasi nofaman, he
paidformygrocer y,Idon’
tknowwhymay behe
didn’
twanttojointhel ongqueueandj ustdeci
dedto
puthisit
emswi thmi ne.Hepaidf ormyt hi
ngs,
I
foundhimveryatt r
activeandnaughty,Ifel
tsoguil
ty
thewholeoflastnight.Ievensleptprayi
ng.Todayat
wor
k,guesswhat
?”
“
What
?”
“Hei
stheboss.Thi
smanisjustatemptat
ionandI
knowIl
oveRona,nodoubtaboutt
hatbuteish…”
Esi
sighed.“
Takeadeepbr
eat
hin.Br
eat
he.
”
Kennyt
ookadeepbr
eat
hin.
“
Ok,
nowy
oucant
ell
me.What
’shappeni
ng?
”
“Heisseducingme…Idon’ tknowifit’
srightt
osay
thatbutheis…andi t’
sinthewayhel ooksatme…I
getwet…l i
keIfeelli
keIam cheat i
ngbutIknowI
wouldnev ercheatonRona.Il ov
ehi m somuch.I
l
ov ehim morethanany t
hing.”
“Ok…lustitis.It’
sjustlust
.Again,
normal.Don’
tbeat
yoursel
ftoomuchf ort
hat,whatmattersi
showy ou
acttowardst hosef eel
i
ngs.Iknowseeinghim most
dayswillbedi ff
icul
tbutIwanty outoremember
yourman.Thi si showIdoi twhenIknowi t’
sget
ti
ng
outofcontrol…It hinkofthegoodmymandof orme
andwhatIl ov eaboutmyman.Somet imesIeven
writ
eallofthem down, ali
st,
theyremindmewhyI
am inlovewi ththismani nt hefirstplace.Ican’ t
j
udgey ouf orbei nghumanbecausel ennaIam not
i
nnocentwheni tcomest obeinghuman.Ihav e
l
ookedatot hermenandt houghtofdi r
t yeroti
c
thi
ngsgoi ngt oanex tentofdr eami ngabouti tbut
that
’sallithasbeen.Wai kgalemel ahel a,(You
repr
imandy ourself,
)youtellyour selfgor eKenny ,
I
am notgoi ngtol etsuchthought scont rolme.You
tel
lyourselfthatIlovemyman, Iam happyand
content.Distancecanbechal lengingsot r
yphone
sex,anythingtogett heedgeof f.Youar ehuman,
youhav eneeds.Nextt i
mey ouar egoi ngt olookat
thi
ssinful manandshakey ourhead.I fhet ri
es
anythi
nghel a,itmayhappen, setf i
rmr ules.Heis
yourbossnotany t
hingelsemor e.”
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
Esil
oved.“Il
ovey out
ooKenny,youcanfightthi
s
temptat
ionoff.Youarehuman,don’
tfeelsoguil
tyt
o
astagewherey outel
lRona.
”Theybothlaughed.
“
Iwoul
dnev
er.
”
“
Good.Justdeal
wit
hyouremot
ions,
wheni
tget
s
toomuch, getup,gotothebat
hr oom,cally
ourman
andt el
lhi
mt hatyouneedtoblowof fsomest eam,
heneedst odosomet hi
ng.Aft
ert hat
,youwill
walk
feel
ingref
reshed!Olesharphela.Don’tf
eelsoguil
ty
forbeinghumanok? ”
“
Ok.
”
“
Good.Sobesi
dest
hat
,howi
stheenv
ironment
?”
“Goodsof
ar.Nocomplai
ns.Ronagotmeacat
eri
ng
companyt
hatwil
ldel
i
verlunchever
yday
.”
“Yousee,y
ouwri
tet
hatasoneoft
hethingsy
oulove
abouthi
m.Nextt
imeobonathesi
nful
boss,t
hinkof
thel
unch.
”
Theyl
aughed.
“Ehh,youthi
nkofthefood,imaginehowmuchi t
takesforhimtodothatforyou,ever
yday,i
t’
s
expensivebuthedoesitbecausehelovesyou.You
writet
hatdown.”
“
Ok.
”
Maat
lawal
kedov
ernowi
nshor
tsshi
rt
less.
“
Okl
ove,
wewi
l
ltal
ktomor
row.
”
“
Youmustbeenj
oyi
ngy
our
sel
fwhi
l
etheki
dsar
e
wi
thy
ourmom.”
“Iam mor
ethanenjoy
ingmy
sel
f.Thepeacei
nthi
s
houseist
odiefor
.”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Ok,l
etmecallRona.Heisprobably
wonder
ingwhattoeatandhasset
tledf
orbread.”
Esil
aughed.“
Heispr
obabl
yeat
ingbr
ead.Okby
e
l
ove.Loveyou.
”
“
Lov
eyout
oo.
”
Esi
hungupt
henhandedMaat
lahi
spl
ate.
“
Yousmel
lfr
esh.
”
Hesmil
ed.“
Unl
i
keot
herpeopl
ewhoar
esmel
l
ing
sex.
”
Esi
laughedwal
ki
ngwi
thhi
mtot
hesi
tt
ingr
oom.
“Tl
herr
awenagakenkgeseki
si!(
Iam notsmel
l
ing
sex.
)”
Theysatdownandst
art
edeat
ingwhi
l
ewat
chi
ng
thei
rshow.
*
**

Ronawal kedinsidehiskitchenandlookedatthe
empt ypotsforawhi l
e, heopenedthefri
dgeand
pouredhimselfjuicethenwentbackt othesit
ting
room toordersomet hingtoeat.Hisphonerangjust
ashesat ,hesmi l
edanswer i
ngthevi
deocall
.
Kennyappear
edont
hescr
eeninar
ednight
dress.
Shesmil
ed.“Hey
…whatar
eyoueat
ing?
”
“
Iam or
der
ingpi
zza.
”
“
Osi
mol
otseaker
e?(
Youhav
est
art
edr
ight
?)”
“
Iwi
l
lst
artcooki
ngt
omor
row.
”
Shesmi
l
ed,
Ronasmi
l
edback.“
Youar
ely
ing.
”
“
Howwasi
t?”
“
Good.Mysuper
visorseemsl
i
ket
hebest
.”
“
Madeanyf
ri
ends?
”
Shel
aughed.“Af
terNametso,
Idon’
tthi
nkIcanev
er
makeanyfri
endsunlessi
t’
sEsi.
”
“
Fri
endsdel
aypr
ogr
esst
oo.
”
“
Yeah…Imi
ssy
ou.
”
“
Imi
ssy
out
oo.
”
“Ir
eadsomewhere,gat
wewecansti
l
lkeepthe
bedroom f
lameal
iv
eev enwi
tht
hedi
stance.
”
Hesmi l
ednaught i
l
y.Shesethercamer at
hensaton
thebedtaki
ngof fherdresssl
owly.Ronaswal
lowed
star
ingatherbreastgoingdowntohersmallwaist
thenherpussy.Hisdickjer
kedinhispant
sasheput
hisj
uicedown.Shel ookedathi
m.
“
Lieony
ourbackandopeny
ourl
egs.
”
Sheslowlyl
aydownthenopenedherlegs,
hel
ooked
atherpussyl
ipsal
lcl
osed.Heswall
owed.
“
Par
tthosel
i
psf
ormebabe…”
Kennysqueezedherbeastwi
tht
heot
herhand
part
ingherpussyl
ips.

*
Meanwhi
l
eKennycl
osedherey
esl
i
steni
ngt
ohi
s
voi
ce.
“
Touchy
our
sel
fli
kehowIwoul
d…”
Shepar t
edherfl
apsmovingclosertothecamera
thenrubbedhercl
iti
ncir
cularmotionsimagi
ningi
t
washi m.Shemoanedsoftlypi
ctur
inghimtherewit
h
her,br
eathi
ngonher,hi
sdickrubbingonherpussy,
hishandsevery
wherewhilehedropswetkisseson
her.
Sheslowlysli
dinherfi
ngerandwhiletheotherhand
rubbedhercli
t.Shecoul
dimaginethatdicksl
idi
ngin
thensinki
nginwhilest
ret
chinghimsel
fin.The
uncomf or
tabl
epleasur
eofhav i
nghim buri
edtothe
hil
t.

Ronalookedathi
sscreenstr
okinghisdickst
ari
ngat
her,al
lhecoul
dimagi
newassl i
dinginthenhavi
ng
thatpussygr
iphi
m asitcl
enchedaroundhim.Then
thatlookofdi scomf ortshealway sgav ehim, that
l
ookt hatalway sturnedhi m on.Hel ookedatheras
shebegunmov ingherhandsal it
tl
ef aster,her
moansi ncr
easing.Fucki twast hosemoanst hat
alway spushedhi mt ot heedgeashedr ill
edint othat
pussyunapol ogetic,feeli
ngitpullhim backev er y
ti
mehesl idoutonl ytopushbacki nagai n.Her
pussyget ti
ngmor eandmor esweetwi t
heacht hrust
whileshescr atchedhi sbagmov i
ngherwai st
beneat hhim,meet ingt hr
ustforthrust.
“Rooonaaaaa….”Kennymoanedloudlyspasmi
ng
throwingherheadbackwhi
leheshothi sl
oadi
nthe
airthendroppedtohi
spantsandfloor.
“Fuck!
”Hest rokedhimselfthenstoppedst ar
ingat
her.Shelookedathim andbl ushedpickinghernight
dressandput ti
ngiton.Ronat ookoffhisshir
tthen
wipedhispant sandthefloor.Hetookt hephoneand
l
ayont hecouchst ari
ngathi m.
“
Hey
…”
Shebl
ushedshy
ly.“
Hey
…”
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
Shegiggl
edt
henlaydownstar
ingatthecamer
a.
“Tel
lmeabouty
ourday.Whatdidyoudotoday
?”
“
Candycameby
.”
“
Todowhat
?”
“Shewaslooki
ngforaj
obbutIt
oldherIcoul
dn’
t
hir
ehersoIref
err
edhersomewhereel
se.”
Shenoddedt
hensmi
l
ed.“
Ok,
whatel
sedi
dyoudo?
”
Ronasmil
edthenbegunt
ell
i
ngheral
labouthi
sday
whil
eshel
ist
enedwithasmil
e.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#36

Tshenolowal kedoutofherr oom int hemor ning,her

handbaghangi ngov ershoulderwithear phones
pl
ungedi nherear s.Kgosiwhowaspar kedather
gatelookedatherasshewal kedov er,
her ubbedhi s
handst ogether,
sheal waysmadehi m nervousandi t
wasonl yher.Herweav ewasst rai
ghtenedper fectl
y
andlookedal mostl i
keherreal hai
r.Itwasj usthow
beautif
ul shewasbuthowshecar ri
edher self.She
wasfor evercalm andsoftspokent hathef ound
hi
msel fwonder i
ngi fshecouldpossi bl
yhandl ehim..
Hebreat hedinonhi shandthensmel thisbr eath
wonder i
ngwher ehismoj osuddenl ywentev eryti
me
hecameacr ossher .
Hecouldn’thav
ehisf
atherdohisrol
e,i
twasal
ready
enoughthathehadapproachedher,
herol
l
eddown
hi
swi ndow.
“
Hey
…”
Tshenol
otur
nedbackt
othebl
ackmodi
fi
ednav
y
bl
ue4x4FordRangerWil
dTrakparkedbythegat
e.
Shesmi
ledsurpr
isedt
aki
ngof fherear
phones
st
ari
ngatKgosiashesmil
edather .
“
Hi…”
“Hey…tsenakegodr
ope.(
Geti
n,l
etmedropyou
off
.)Ihavethi
rt
ymi
nutest
ospar
ebefor
ework.
”
Shenodded,heopenedthedoorforherwhil
einthe
car.Shegoti
nthenputonherseatbel
t.Kgosidr
ove
offassoftmusi
cplayedint
hecar.
Shel
ookedathi
m andsmi
l
ed.“
Howdi
dyouknow
wher
eIstay
?”
Hel
ookedatherandsmi
l
ed.“
Ihav
emyway
s.
War
enghel
a?”
Tshenoloshookherheadst ar
ingathim,nowasshe
l
ookedathi m,hedi dn’
tlookli
kehewentt ochur
ch
especiall
ywit
ht hosetattoossheneverknewhehad
thatcoveredhisarms.Ther ewassomet hi
ngabout
him, shecoul
dn’tputafingeronitbutshehadnever
noticeditout
sidethechur chwall
s.Heturnedt
oher
catchingherstari
ngthensmi l
ed.
“
Whatar
eyoust
udy
ingatUB?
”
“
Tour
ism andHospi
tal
i
tyManagement
.”
Henodded.“
Ihav
eafriendwhostudiedt
hatand
t
odayhenowownsar esortkoKasanekwa,i
t’
s
r
eal
lygoi
ngwellf
orhi
m. ”
“
Thati
smydr
eam.
”
“Yah,t
hisday
swor
kingf
orsomeonei
sal
oadof
bull
shi
t.”
“
Sowhatdoy
oudof
oral
i
ving?
”
“Orabesidespl
ayi
ngkeyboar
dandsingi
ng
hal
lel
ujahatchur
ch?”Hechuckl
ed.“
Iownapr
int
ing
company .
”Hehandedherabusi
nesscar
d.
“
Wepr
intev
ery
thi
ng.
”
Tshenol
onoddedst
ari
ngatt
hebusi
nesscar
d.Hi
s
phonerang.
“
Eit
a…keet
la,
nkemel
e.”
Hehungupparkingi
nsi
detheUBparki
nglot.He
st
aredatherasshel
ookedathi
m curi
ousl
y.
“
Askme.
”
Shesmi
l
edshy
ly.“
Whendi
dyougett
hoset
att
oos?
”
“Year
sback.What
?That
’snothowChr
ist
ians
behave?
”
Sheshookherhead.“
Uh…”
“PastorPi lanei smyst epf ather,Iam Kgosi Disang, I
havemyownf at her.Ididn’tgr owupi nachur ch.I
didn’
tgr owf ollowi ngcer taintypesofr ulesandwhat
notthoughIr espectchur chandGod.Ial sol ovemy
stepf atherbecausehei scool .
”Het il
tedherchi n
stari
ngi nherey es.“Iam notahol ymani fthat ’s
whaty ouwer et hinking.Iam nowher ecl oset o
beinghol y
, I
’
m pr obabl ygoi ngt orotinhel l,
ify ouare
l
ooki ngf orahol yman, goandgr abthebi bl
eand
prayhar dforhi m.May bef astanddot hatloadof
crapbecausei nme, hei snott here,withmey ouar e
getti
ngt hereal deal,Iam notgoi ngt owast emy
ti
mel yingtoy ou, Iam nothol y,andmay beIam
bad…”Heshr ugged.“ Idon’tcar ebecauset heonl y
personwhocanj udgemei st heoneupt her ebutI
am notgoi ngt opr etendt obehol y.Wear eal l
sinnersonewayort heot herandwewi ll
pr obabl y
meeti nhel l.
”
Tshenolobl i
nkedacoupl eofti
messt ar
ingathim.
Hecar essedhercheekt henleanedoverandgave
herasof tkissthatweakenedherimmedi at
ely
.He
ti
l
tedherheadast hekissgotmor edemandingand
aggressive.Hegav eherbabykissseali
ngitofft
hen
smil
ed.
“
Go,
youar
elat
efory
ourf
ir
stl
esson.
”
Sheswal
l
owedt henlookedatthet
ime,shewas3
minut
esl
ateal
ready.Sheclear
edherthroat
.
“
Thanks.
”
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngt
oni
ght
?”
Sheshookherhead.“
Not
hing.
”
“
Iwi
l
lbr
ingdi
nner
,ist
hatokwi
thy
ou?
”
“
Ng.
.”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Shar
p.”
Hiscardroveoffasherhear
tpounded,kneesweak
andtheonlypersonshecouldthi
nkoftel
li
ngwas
Kenny.Shelookedatherphonethenswall
owedher
pri
detaki
ngoutherphoneandcal l
edher.Thephone
rangforawhile.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
…howar
eyou?
”
“
Iam f
ineTshenol
o.”
“
Howi
syouri
nter
nshi
p?”
“
Fine.
”
“Iam sor
ryf
orhowourl
astconv
ersat
ionwent
down.”
“Don’tbe.Thisfr
iendshipnowf eelsfor
cedand
may beit’
sjustti
mewecal l
editqui t
s,y
oudoy our
churchthingandIdomyownt hing.Idon’twantto
makey ouuncomf ort
ableanymor e.Youchangedor
webot hchanged, whateveri
tmaybe, i
t’
sf i
ne.I
acceptthatthisfr
iendshiphasdied.”
“ThemmaKennydon’
tsaythat
.Iam sor
ry.MaybeI
havebeent
oomuchlatel
y.YouandIcomef r
om
far.
”
“
Iam wal
ki
ngi
natwor
k,by
e.”
Kennyhungup,Tshenolol
ookedatherphone
feel
i
ngguil
tyt
henr ushedt
oherclass.
*
**

Sel
etsosatonthebedatherboyfr
iend’
shouse
goi
ngt hr
oughhersavi
ngs.Herphonerangasshe
di
daf ewcalcul
ati
ons.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“WhatdoIhearabouty
ouget
ti
ngadi
vor
ce
Sel
etso?
”
Shesi
ghed.“
Mama,
thatmar
ri
agei
sdead.
”
“
Becausey
ouar
echeat
ing.
”
“I
tlongendedbef
oret
hat
.Itl
ongendedbef
orei
t
evenstar
ted.Mot
husi
neverl
ovedme.”
“
Sowhydi dyoumarryhi
mi fheneverl
ovedyou?
Whydidhemar r
yyou?Hehasbeendoi ngsomuch
f
orourfamil
y,i
fhedidn’
tloveyou,
whywouldhedo
t
hat
?”
Tear
sfi
l
ledhereyes.“
Itwasacompr omise.Ican’
t
st
ayint
hatunhappymarri
age.Ihav
et r
iedbutIcan’t
any
mor
e.”
“Becauseyouhavef oundsomeoneel
sedi
dn’tyou?I
cannotbeli
evethi
s,onlythr
eeyear
sandal
readyyou
arejumpingtoanotherpeni
s.”
“Theonl
ywr ongIdi
dwastocheatbutev
eni
fIdi
dn’
t
Iwassti
llgoingt
oleav
ehi
m.”
“Ihav
ecalledforafamil
ymeet
ing,hi
sfamilyt
oo.
Youjustdon’tscr
eam y
ouwantadi v
orce.Whohave
youseenthatbehavesli
ket
hat
? ”
“
Ist
il
lwantadi
vor
ce.
”
“Youbett
erbeher
elat
ert
oday,
Hisfami
l
yisal
so
coming.Wearegoi
ngtosol
vethi
s.”
Selet
sohungup,herhandsonherfaceas
frust
rat
iont
ookover.Shet
ookadeepbr eat
hthen
tookherphoneagai
napplyi
ngforj
obsinGaborone.

*
**

Ronast
oodbyt
hewi
ndowi
nhi
sof
fi
cet
alki
ngont
he
phone.ThedooropenedthenLesangwal
kedin,
he
fr
ownedst ar
ingathert
henconti
nuedwit
hhisphone
cal
lforafewmi nut
es.
“
Ok,
letmel
ookatt
hoseandgetbackaty
ou.By
e.”
Hehungupandst
aredatLesang.“
Whatar
eyou
doi
ngher
e?”
“
Icamet
otal
ktoy
ou.Icomei
npeace.
”
“
Obat
lang?(
Whatdoy
ouwant
?)”
“Icametoapol
ogi
ze.Iam sor
ryf
orev
ery
thi
ngt
hat
happened.
”
“
Ilongf
orgav
eyou,
Idi
ditf
ormyownpeace.
”
Shesighed.“
Ihav
ebeensoashamedt
ocomeand
apol
ogize.
”
“
Ihav
ecallst
omake,
whatdoy
ouwantLesang?
Wholety
ouin?”
“Therewasnooneatt
hef
rontdesk.Ij
ustcamet
o
apologi
ze.
”
“
It
’sf
ine.If
orgav
eyou.
”
“
Doy
our
eal
l
ylov
eher
?”
“
Yes.
”
Lesangnodded.“
Ok.
.Iam happyf
ory
ou.
”
Shet ur nedt owal koutbutt henpausedt urningback
tof acehi m.“ Youknowi t’sfunnyhownowIam t he
mosthat edonei nt heci rcleofy ourfriends.It’shurt
you, Iadmi tbuty oust artedt hiswheny oucoul dn’t
getov ery ourexandkeptcheat i
ngonmewi t
hherat
thebegi nningofourr elationship.Noonewi llever
l
ookatt hat.Younev err eall
yl ovedmebutj ustt hat
youwer etryingt opr ov etoy oursel
fandev eryone
elset haty ouhadmov edonpasther .Ihavebeen
thinkingoft hislatelyandi t’
sf unnyhowsomehow
Kennyi ssi milartoher .May bey ouarel ookingf or
Kay ,funnyev ent heirnamesar esimilar.Kennyand
Kay .Hopef ullyyour eal l
yl oveKennybecauseIsee
historyr epeat ingitselfwhenKayf i
nisheswi thher
school anddeci dest ocomeback. ”
Lesangwal
kedoutpassi
nghi
sPAwhowaswal
ki
ng
i
n.

*
**
Duringlunchhour,Kennygotherfoodfr
om t
he
recepti
ont hensmil
edwal ki
ngbacktoherof
fi
ceas
therecepti
onistandherco-wor
kerwatchedherr
ock
her7inchheel ssashayi
ngaway.
“
Eishwai
tseee!
”
Therecepti
oni
stlaughed.“
Heela,
karemogheli
sthe
tal
kofthisbui
ldi
ng,kanaokgwetsaRubi
cone
pakil
engkontl
e.(
shedr i
vestheRubi
conparked
outsi
de.
)”
“
Youl
i
e!”
“
Iam t
ell
i
ngy
ou,
it’
sher
s.”
“Shemustbedati
ngdisugardaddy
.Ther
eisnoway
shecanaff
ordthat
.”
“Thereisnootherexplanat
ionandsheispret
ty
bathong,l
epresidentakanaamot say
a.(shecan
eventakethepresident.
)”
Theylaughed.“
Iwon’tbesurpr
ised,
sheiswayt
oo
beauti
fult
henfrom t
hereotsweredibodyt
sabo
Thuli
Phongolo!
”
“Mmekanat hisi
sthety pethatusuallyselfdi
stracts
fasterthananyone.Thef actthatsheisbeautifulwil
l
gettoherheadsomuchshewon’ tappreciate
anythingbecauseshef eelseveryoneneedst opr ay
thegroundshewal kson.Shewi llhav
ef l
oodsof
mencomi ngforherandst uffandmostl ikel
yshe
will
dieal l
alonebecauseshewast edhert i
me
j
umpi ngf r
om onemant oanot her
.”
“Wafheba,i
maginehel aasanemandat ingher….
str
esswil
lprobablykil
lhim.Imaginetr
yingtofigur
e
outwhatsheisdoing…nowondert heRubicon.
Whoeverboughtitfordidittomakesureshe
doesn’
tcheatbuthedoesn’ tknowthatshewi l
l
cheati
nthatcar.
”
Ther
ecept
ionphoner
ang,
ther
ecept
ioni
stpi
cked.
“
Smar
tLi
feI
nsur
ancehel
l
o?”
“Ther
eisacarbl
ocki
ngme,
cany
out
ell
theownert
o
comeandmov ei
t?”
Therecept
ioni
stcl
ear
edhert
hroat
.“YesMr
.Bat
sil
e,
whichcari
sit?
”
“
Rubi
cony
ewhi
te.
”
“
Letmecal
lher
.”
SheputMr
.Bat
sil
e’
scal
lonhol
dthencal
l
edKenny
’s
off
ice.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
HiKenny
,yourcari
sbl
ocki
nganot
herout
side.
”
“
Oh…ok,
Iam comi
ng.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
ShedroppedKenny
’scal
lthenswi
tchedhert
oboss.
“Shei
scomi ng.
”
“
Thanks.
”

*
**

Kennywi pedhermouththenquickl
ywalkedoutof
herof
fice.Shehurri
edtohercarholdi
ngthecarkeys.
Shepausedst ar
ingatNatest
andinginfrontofacar
busyonhi sphone.Herai
sedhisheadandl ookedat
hersl
idinghisphoneinhi
spocket .
“
Ombl
oki
l
e.Iwantt
odr
iveout
.”
Shet
ookadeepbr
eat
h.“
Iam sor
ry.Iwi
l
lmov
e.”
Shegotinhercarthenmov edhercartoanother
spot.Shesteppedoutl
ockinghercarashedr ov
e
overandstoppedhiscarbesideher
,hiswindow
rol
leddown
“
Howar
eyouf
indi
ngMaunsof
ar?
”
“
Ihav
en’
tseenmucht
osayany
thi
ng.
”
Hesmiled.“Tsena,
letmetakey
ououtf
orl
unch.
Cour
tesyfrom theboss.
”
“
Ial
readygotmyl
unch.
”
“
Iknowbutyouhav en’
teatenhavey ou?Tsena.Thi
s
i
sstr
ict
lypr
ofessi
onal.Getin.Yoursuperv
isori
snot
i
nandwon’tbein,getin!
”
“
Ilef
tmyt
hingsi
nsi
det
heof
fi
ce.
”
“Therearesurveil
l
ancecameras,
noonewi l
lst
eal
anything.Aretsamaye.(
Let
’sgo.)Iam t
ell
i
ngy ou
asy ourboss.Tsena.
”
Kenny
’shear
tpoundedasshest
aredathi
m,hewas
tel
li
nghernotasking.Shereluct
ant
lyopenedt
he
doorandgoti n.Hedroveoffassheputonher
seatbel
t,carkeysi
nherhand.
“Ij
ustwanttomakecl
eart hatIam happyinmy
rel
ati
onshi
pandIwil
lneverwantt ogetinvol
vedwi
th
youoranyoneel
seinany
t hingunprofessi
onal
.
Especi
all
yyou.
”
Heglancedathersi
l
entl
ythensmi
l
edshaki
nghi
s
headlooki
ngbackatther
oad.
.
.
3k+li
kesand300+comment
sforabonusf
ami
l
y,
l
ikeandcommentaftery
our
ead
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#37

Ronat r
iedKenny’sphoneagainwit
haf rownwal ki
ng
outofhisoffi
ce.Hesighedgetti
nginhiscarnow
worri
ed.Hest ar
tedhiscaranddrovetohisbrother’
s
house.Awhi l
elaterheparkedbesi
dehisbrother’s
carthensteppedoutasMaat lawal
kedout .
Maat
lal
ookedathi
swor
ri
edf
ace.“
What
’swr
ong?
”
“Kennyi
sn’
tpi
cki
ng.Atfi
rstIwasconv
incedshewas
busybuti
t’
sbeenhour
snow. ”
“Maybeshei
sstil
latwor
kandt
hephonei
sinher
bagorsomet
hing.”
“
Maybe,kegor
ehel
aIam worried.Shedoesn’
tknow
manypeopl
einMaun.Shedoesn’tknowanyone.
”
“Shei
sabiggi
rl
,Iam suresheisf
ine.You’
vegott
o
stopwor
ryi
ngoverherl
ikethi
sasifsheisachi
ld.
Kennyi
sagrownwoman. ”
Ronasi
ghed.“
Whatdi
dyouwant
?”
Maat
laputhi
shandsi
nhi
spocket
.“Imessedup.
”
“
Atsi
l
eal
readyt
oldme.
”
“
Whyam Inotsur
pri
sed?
”
“What’sgoi
ngonwithyou?Youar
eonewhoal
way
s
preachesaboutf
ait
hful
ness.
”
“Imadeami st
ake.Ihavebeentr
yingtogethol
dof
Bofelothewholedayandseemsshet hr
ewawayher
sim car
d.IfeverEsifi
ndsoutabout,mymarri
agewi
ll
beont heli
ne.”
“
Whatar
eyougoi
ngt
odonow?
”
“Iwasgoi
ngtogot herebutIhav
edut
iesher
eand
gener
alwon’
tletmel eav
e.Canyougoforme?I
wanthert
oabor t
.”
“
Doesshewantt
oabor
t?”
“That
’sthethi
ng,no.Iwasgoingt
oconvinceheri
fI
wenttherebutnowy ouwil
lhavet
odoit.Iam
beggi
ng, IknowyouarebusyatworkbutIhaveno
oneelsetoask.”
“
Wher
eisshe?
”
“
Rakops.
”
“
Youwer
eseei
ngherony
ourl
astt
ri
p?”
“
Yeah.
”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evey
ououtofal
lpeopl
ewoul
ddot
his.
”
“
Iam notGodRona,
Imakemi
stakest
oo.
”
“Mistakeshappenbuttheyshoul
dn’
tendupi
n
pregnancyoccurr
ing.
”
“Ar
eyougoi
ngt
ogo?Rakopsiscl
osetoMaun,
you
canev
engoandseeKennyaf
tert
hat
.”
Ronasi
ghed.“
Ican’
tbel
i
eveIam agr
eei
ngt
othi
s..
”
Maat
lasi
ghed.“
Ial
readygott
heabor
ti
onpi
l
ls.
”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evet
his.
”
Het
ookt
hem outf
rom hi
spockett
henhandedt
hem
t
ohi
m.
“
Youknowhowt
heywor
kri
ght
?”
Ar
onal
ookedatt
hecy
tot
eci
nhi
shandst
hensi
ghed.
“
Iwi
l
lgot
oni
ght
,tomor
rowIwoul
dhav
ear
ri
ved.
”
“
Thanky
ousomuch.
”
Esi
wal
kedoutoft
hehouset
hensmi
l
ed.
“
HeyRona…whatar
eyouguy
sdoi
ng?
”
Maatl
aputhi
sarm aroundherki
ssi
nghercheek.
“
Nothi
ng,j
ustdi
scussingafewthi
ngs.
”
“Ok.Anyway
s,areyoucomi
ngi
nRona?Youshoul
d
eatbefor
eyouleav
e.”
“
AhnoIam good.
”
“Ohok,Ihavebeent
ryngt
ogethol
dofKenny
,shei
s
notpi
cking.
”
“
Yeah,
met
oo.
”
Esi
slowl
ynoddedt
hensmi
l
ed.“
Ok,
seey
ouar
ound.
”
Shwal
kedbacki
nsi
det
hehouse.
“
Ok,
shar
paker
e?”
Ronanoddedthengoti
nhiscaranddrov
eofft
ryi
ng
Kenny’
sphoneyetagai
n.Hi
sheartski
ppedasi
tgot
answered.
“
Hel
l
o?”
Hef
rowned.“
Who’
sthi
s?Wher
eisKenny
?”
“Hi
,youarespeaki
ngtoBontl
e,HR,Kennyl
onglef
t
dur
inglunchandnowwear eall
knocki
ngoff,
her
bagissti
llher
eandsoishercar.
”
“
Andnooneknowswher
eshei
s?”
“No.Evenherl
unchishere,
unfini
shed.Shewas
cal
ledtoremovehercarbecauseitwasbl ocki
ng
anotherandt
hat’
swhenshewasl astseen.”
“
Fuck!Can’
tyoucheckt
hecamer
asorsomet
hing?
”
“Wedidbutwher eshewasparkedther
eareno
cameras,weonlyseeherwalki
ngoutofthebuil
ding
hol
dingjusthercarkey
sthenaftert
hatnot
hing,
she
nevercameback.”
Ronast
art
edsweat
ingwor
ri
edl
y.
“
Iam comi
ngt
her
e.”
“
Ok.Iwi
l
lhol
dont
ohert
hings.
”
“
What
’sy
ournameagai
n?”
“
Bont
leKenosi
.”
“
Ok.Thanky
ou.
”
Hehungupdr
ivi
ngt
ohi
shousewher
ehequi
ckl
y
changedandpackedasmal
lbagbef
oredr
ivi
ngof
f.

*
**

Kennywalkedinsi
det
hecompany’spremises
hol
dinghercarkeyst
hent
herecepti
onistl
ookedat
her
.
“Hey,weweresoworri
edwonder
ingwher
eyouwent
ebil
ekoloi
elekont
le.
”
Kennysmil
ed.“
Thecompanycarpickedmeup
gotwekeaworkshop.Icoul
dn’
tev
encomebackf
or
mybag.”
“
Oh…y
ourbagi
swi
thBont
le.
”
Kennyf
rownedconf
used.“
Who’
sBont
le?
”
“
HR.Mr
s.Kenosi
.Yourphonewasr
ingi
ng.
”
“
Eish…i
ssheal
readygone?
”
“
Yes.Butletmecal
lhersoy
oucangoandcol
l
ect
y
outhings.”
Ther
ecept
ioni
stt
ookt
hewor
kphoneandcal
l
edher
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
HeyBont
le,
Kennyi
sher
e.”
“Iam al
readyhome.Justdi
recthert
omyhouse,
akereshehasacar?”
“
Yes.
”
Therecept
ioni
sthungupdi
rect
edKennyt
oBont
le’
s
house.
“
Okt
hanky
ou.IhopeIdon’
tgetl
ost
.”
Kennywal kedoutt henjumpedi nhercaranddr ove
offwonder i
nghowmanyt imesRonahadcal l
edand
whathewaspossi bl
ythinking.Awhi l
elaterKenny
parkedhercari nfrontofahouset hensteppedout
walkinginsi
det hegate.Sheknockedont hemai n
doort hensteppedbackwai ti
ng.Minuteslater,al
ady
steppedoutwear ingspect acles.
“
Hi…”
“
Hi,
thanky
ousomuchf
ort
aki
ngmyt
hings.
”
“
Ijustgotacal
lfr
om Mr
.Bat
sil
e.Hei
ssay
ingy
ou
wentfort
hewor kshop, nextti
mewhent hecompany
carcomestopicky ouup.Yout el
lthedrivert
owai
t
andtakeyourbelongings.”Shesmi led.“
Iknowyou
aresti
l
lnewbutdon’ tbet i
mid.”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Eemma.
”
“Iknowy ouprobablypani ckedbutnexttimejust
rel
ax.Graby ourbelongingst hengo.IknowMs
Edwardswast heonesupposedandy ouwere
holdi
ngfort heinsuranceanal ystof
fi
ce.Nextti
me,
youtakey ourbelongingst henleaveamessageso
thatwemayknowwhat ’
sgoi ngon.”
“
Eemma.
”
Bont
lehandedherherbags.“
Therewego, uhhyour
boyf
ri
endcall
edandsaidsomet hi
ngaboutbeingon
hi
swayhere.Hesoundedwor r
ied.”
“
Oh,
thanks.
”
“
Bye.
”
Kennywal
kedt
ohercarthenjumpedjustasher
phonest
art
edr
ingi
ng.ShepickedEsi
’
scall.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
OhmyGodKenny!Ihav
ebeent
ryi
ngt
ocal
lyou.
Wher
ewer
eyou?”
“
Eishmma,
it’
sal
ongst
orybutIam ok.
”
“
Whatwer
eyoudoi
ng?
”
“
Iwil
ltel
lyou,
letmecal
lRona.Ihearhei
sonhi
s
wayhere.
”
Shehungupandcal
l
edRonast
art
ingt
hecar
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Babe…”
“Hey,
wherewerey
ou?Iwaswor
ri
ed…whywer
eyou
notanswer
ing?
”
“Iwentf
orawor kshopfi
l
li
ngi
nformysupervi
sor
..
.
Thecompanycarf oundmeout
sidet
henIjust
j
umpedi n.Iam sor
ry.
”
Ronasi
ghed.“
It
’sok.
”
“Iheary
ouareonyourwayher
e.Youdon’
thav
eto
come.Iam f
ine.
”
“
Ok.Whatwast
hewor
kshopabout
?”
“
Idon’
tevenknow,Iwasjustconf
usedthr
oughout
mmeItooknotes,Iwi
ll
givethem t
oMsEdwar ds
t
omorr
ow.Ilookedli
ketheonlyst
upidonether
e.”
Hechuckl
ed.“
Weal
lhav
ebeent
her
e.Iam sor
ry.
”
“
It
’sok.Ihaveal
otofmi
ssedcal
l
s.Ev
enKef
il
we
wascall
ing.
”
“
Shepr
obabl
ywant
smoney
.”
“Iknowandthefactt
hatshei
smymot
herIf
indi
t
hardtosayno.
”
“Youshoul
dlear
ntosaynobecauseshewi
l
lnev
er
stopbabe.
”
“Yah…dur
ingtheweekendIam goi
ngt
oseemy
grandmot
her.
”
“
Shewoul
dli
ket
hat
.”
“
Iknow,
it’
sgoi
ngt
obeasur
pri
se.
”
Kennystoppedhercarbesi
det
hepol
i
cecaratt
he
tr
aff
icl
ights.
“
BabeIhavet
ogo,
thepol
i
cei
sri
ghtbesi
deme.I
l
oveyou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Shehungupandputonherseat beltthendr
ov eoff
.
Atherhouse,sheki
ckedoffherheelsassoonas
shewalkedinthenwentt
oherbedr oom undressi
ng
whil
ecall
inghermother
.
“
Kenei
l
we,
whywer
eyounotanswer
ing?
”
“
Iwasbusy
.”
“
Iam aski
ngf
orP500,
Iwi
l
lret
urni
t.
”
“
That’
swhaty
oual
way
ssaybuty
ounev
err
etur
nmy
money.
”
“
Thi
sti
mear
oundIwi
l
lret
urni
t.
”
“
Youwon’
t.Idon’
thav
emoney
.”
“
Youhav
ear
ichboy
fri
end,
geti
tfr
om hi
m.”
“Hei
snotmybank.Idon’
thav
emoney
.Askf
rom
someoneel
se.
”
“
Ican’
tbel
iev
eyouar
etr
eat
ingmel
i
ket
his.Iam
y
ourmother!
”
“
Onethatdoesn’
tcar
eaboutmeti
l
lshewant
s
money.Idon’
thav
emoneyKefi
l
we.”
“
Youar
egoi ngtoregrett
his,
youshoul
dnev
ert
reat
y
ourmotherli
kethis.
”
Kennyshookherheadthenhungupandgotinsi
de
herbat
hroom.Shetookashowerwashingoffal
lthe
sweatbefor
eprepar
inghersel
fsomethi
ngtoeat
thi
nki
ngofwhathadhappenedearli
eron.

*
**

Aronalookedatthet
imedr i
vingcal
cul
ati
ngwhat
ti
mehewoul dpr
obablyarr
iveinMaundecidi
ngt
o
passbyRakopsonhi swayback.Hesteppedonthe
accel
eratorpl
ayi
ngmusi c.

*
**

Kgosiparkedhiscarinfr
ontoft het woandhal f
.
Tshenoloopenedhercurtai
nslight l
yandlookedat
hi
mt alki
ngonhi sphonewhil
esi ttedinhi
scar .She
ti
diedaroundthensighedsi
tti
ng, herheartpounding.
Minut
esl
aterheknockedsoft
lyonherdoor
,she
t
ookadeepbr eat
hthenopened.
Kgosi
smi
l
edf
aci
ngher
.“Hey
…”
Shesmil
edmov i
ngf
rom t
hedoort
henhewal
kedi
n
hol
dingl
unch.
“
Youcanputi
tther
e.”
Kgosiputt
hef ooddownthenl
ookedaroundher
room.Shedidn’thav
emuchbutitwasclean.She
dishedashi
sphoner ang.
“
Asecond.
”
Hewalkedoutpicki
ng.Shelookedathim cur
iousl
y
ashestoodbyhiscartalki
ngonthephone.He
wal
kedbackin,Tshenolostar
edathim wondering
j
ustwhohereall
ywas.Whatshet houghthewas
wasn’
twhohewas.
Hewal
kedov
ert
henputhi
shandsonherwai
st.
“
Don’
tov
ert
hinki
tbabe…”
Heleanedoverandki
ssedher,Tshenol
oputher
handsonhischestki
ssi
nghim back.Hepi
ckedher
upandlayheronthebedgett
ingbetweenherlegs,
theybothbreat
hedheav
il
y.Kgosi
pausedt
hen
smiledbit
inghi
slowerl
i
p.
“
Thi
sissi
nful
.Youwi
l
lgot
ohel
l
.”
Shel
aughedshy
ly.“
Let
’seat
.”
Helookedi
nhereyesthenki
ssedheragai
nbef
ore
si
tt
ingbesi
dehereat
ing.
“
Whatdoy
ouwat
ch?
”
Shel
ookedathi
m andl
aughed.“
Mybooks.
”
“
Eish,
Ijusthadt
ofal
lfort
hener
d.”
Tshenol
osmil
edthenshr
ugged.“
Notmyf
aul
t.CanI
askyousomet
hing?”
“
Shootonl
yify
oucanhandl
etheanswer
.”
“
Arey
oui
nvol
vedi
nbaddoi
ngs?
”
“
Cany
ouhandl
etheanswerf
ort
hat
?”
Shel
ookedathi
mthennodded.“
Iwantt
oknow.
”
“Ok,yesandno,itdependsonwhaty
ouconsi
der
bad.Ical
lithust
li
ng.”Hesmil
ed.“
Happy
?”
Shenoddedwi
thasmi
l
eandcont
inuedeat
ing.A
whil
elat
ershet
ookoutherl
apt
opsotheywat
ch
somethi
ng.whi
l
echatt
ingandl
aughi
ng.

*
**

Earl
ymor ni
ng,j
ustafterthree,
Aronasteppedoutof
hiscarthenopenedthegat eanddroveinparki
ng
besideKenny’
scar.Hest eppedoutandwal kedto
thegateandclosedit
.Hewentf orherdoorholdi
ng
hisbagthenstoodbyt hedoorcalli
ngher.
“
Hel
l
o…”
Hesmiledasshel
azi
l
yspoke.“
Bul
alebat
i.(
Opent
he
door
.)
”
“
Huh?
”
“Bul
alebati
.(Openthedoor.
)”Heknockedhangi
ng
up.Herbedroom li
ghtsswi
tchedonthenthecur
tai
n
movedslight
ly.Secondsl
atersheopenedand
smil
ed.
“
Hey
…It
houghty
ouwentback.
.”
Hesmi
l
edwal
ki
ngi
nandhuggedher
.
“
Hey
…Iwasal
readyonmywayher
eei
therway
.”
Heclosedthedoort
henpi
ckedherupandtookher
backtothebedr
oom.Heundressedandl
aidbesi
de
her.
“
Why
?”
“
Promisenottot
ell
,i
t’
sasecr
ett
hatmaybr
eaka
r
elat
ionshi
p.”
“
Iwon’
t.
”
“Maatl
awascheati
ngandthewomanhewas
cheati
ngwit
hisnowpregnant
.Ihav
etoconv
ince
hertoabor
t.Shei
sinRakops.
”
“
What
?”
“
Esi
shoul
dn’
tknowaboutt
his.
”
“
Ican’
tbel
ievet
his.Shehasbeennot
hingbutagood
wi
fetohi
m. ”
“Peopl
emakemistakesbabe.Thatdoesn’
tmeanhe
doesn’
tlov
eher
.”
“
Woul
dyouf
orgi
vemei
fIcheat
ed?
”
“Iwi
llsimplyj
ustkil
lyoutoget
herwithyour
boyf
riend.Aft
erthatIwil
lki
llmysel
fthenit
’sov
er
l
ikethat.
”
Kennyl
ookedathimthencl
earedhert
hroat
.“You
see?NowimaginehowEsiwil
lfeel
when-“
“
Shewil
lnev
erfi
ndoutbecausey
ouar
enotgoi
ngt
o
t
ell
her
…oranyone.
”
“
Thet
rut
hal
way
shasawayofcomi
ngout
.”
“Thi
sonecannev ercomeout.”Hegotbet weenher
l
egsr ubbi
nghisdi
ckonher.Hesl i
dhisfingers
betweenherpussyli
psthenkissedherfeelingher
wetnessthenhetookouthisdickrubbi
ngi tonher
soft
lybefor
epushinghi
mselfinwithagr unt.

6MONTHSLATER…
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#38

I
nFrancist
own, Sel
etsowalkedoutofthecourtr
oom
wi
thhersisterbesi
deher.Shelookedattheti
me
t
hensighedashersi st
erl
ookedather.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
“
Yeah,
it’
sfi
nal
l
yov
er.Ther
eisnot
hingl
eft
.”
“
Ist
il
lthi
nky
oushoul
dhav
etakenLef
a.”
“
Idon’twantt
of i
ghtwi
thMot husi
.Iknowhewant
ed
t
ofightmeont hi
sbutIhonestl
ydon’thav
eti
mefor
t
hat.Ij
ustwantpeace.
”
“I
magi neanotherwomanr ai
singyourchi
l
d, nna
personall
yIcan’thandl
eit
.Iwouldneverletanother
womanr ai
semybaby .
”
Sel
etsoputonhersungl
asses.“
Ijustwantpeace.
”
Mothusiwalkedoutwit
hhi sl
awyerthenhewalked
overtoher.Shetookadeepbreathashe
approachedthenhersi
stergoti
nthecarwait
ingfor
her
.
“
Hey
…”
“
Hi…howar
eyou?
”
“
Iam f
ine.
”
Henodded.“
Iwant
edt
otal
kaboutLef
a’sv
isi
ts.
”
“Iwi
l
ltakehi
m dur
inghol
i
day
s.May
beweekendsi
fI
am i
nMaun.”
“
That
’sgoodwi
thme.
”
“
Ok,
thent
hat
’ssor
ted.
”
Shewatchedhim walkawaythengoti
nhersist
er’
s
carandtookoffherheel
sputti
ngonherf
latpumps.
Sheputherheelsinherbag.
“
Whatdi
dhesay
?”
“
HewasaskingaboutLef
a’svisi
ts.I
t’
sfunnyhowhe
i
snotev
enconcernedwit
ht hefactt
hatIwalkedout
wi
thnot
hing.
”
“
Justl
eav
ehi
m.”
“
Iam j
ustr
eal
l
yhur
tthataf
terev
ery
thi
ngIdi
dIam
walki
ngoutwit
hnothi
ng.KanawhenIf
oundhi
m,he
hadnothi
ng!Nothi
ng!
”
“
It
’spar
tofl
i
fe.It
hinki
t’
sti
mey
ouowny
ourt
hings.
”
“Iwast herewhenheboughtt heplot
s,Ichosethem.
Iwast herewhent hehousewasbought .Mysal ar
y
boughtgr ocer
iesinthehouse,boughtf
oodwhi lehe
boughtt heassetsbecausethat’
swhatweagr eedon
thentodayIwal koutwithnothi
ng.Iwil
lneverrepeat
thesamemi stakeeveragai
n.”
“
Wher
eisKhumo?
”
“
Hei
sbusyatwor
k.”
“
Ineedt
oseehi
m oneoft
heday
s.”
Sel
etsosmi
l
ed.“
Youwi
l
l.
”
Hersi
sterdr
ovehert
other
ank.
“
Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ngt
osuppor
tme.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
Thesi
ster
shugged.“
Bye…”
Sel
etsost
eppedoutoft
hecart
hengotinthebus
whi
lehersi
sterdr
oveaway
.Shelookedatherbar
e
fi
nger,shesti
l
lhadthemar
kofaringonherfi
nger
butfuck!I
tfel
tsogoodbei
ngf
ree.Shecal
ledher
boyf
riend.
“
Heybabe…”
“
Hey
,Iam i
nthebus.
”
“
It
’sdone.
”
“
Final
l
y!”
Sel
etsosmi
l
ed.“
Iam onmyhome.
”
“
Iwi
l
lpi
cky
ouup.
”
“
Ok,
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”

*
**

Mothusisi
ghedthi
nki
ngofhiswayforwardashe
dr
ove,itwasti
metoputthatbusi
nessplani
n
moti
on.Hestoppedbyafil
li
ngstat
ion.
“
Ful
ltankhoMi
ster
.”
“
Sur
esur
e!”
Hetookouthi
sphoneandrepl
i
edtoaf
ew
messagesbef
orecal
l
ingt
henanny
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hi,
Iam onmywayback.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Bye.
”
Hehungupthengavetheat
tendantthemoneyand
dr
oveoff
,thenextwomanhewasgoi ngtofal
li
n
l
ovewit
hwasgoi ngtor
ecei
venothingbuthi
sbest
.
Hewasn’
tgoingtowastehi
stimeagain.

*
**

AtSmartLi
feInsurance,Kennyaddedmorechi
li
saucet
oheralreadyspicywingsasacoll
eague
l
ookedatheranhourbef oreknocki
ngof
f.
“
Kennymmangng…”
Kennypausedeat
ingt
henl
ookedather
.“What
?”
“
Youar
epr
egnant
.”
“KanammeIcheckedandt
hepr
egnancyt
estonl
y
showedonel
i
ne.”
“It
hinkyoushoul
dcheckatthehospi
tal
.Kanaeven
youreat
inghaschanged.Youwereondietandnow
notanymore.
”
“
Iwi
l
lresumemydi
etwhenIgobackt
oGabs.
”
“Yourboyf
ri
endwil
lbesohappy ,youkeepdenyingit
butther
eisabunintheoven.Youar enowcurvier
thanevert
houghImustsay,pregnancylooksgood
ony ou.
”
“
Iam t
ell
i
ngy
ou.Iam notpr
egnant
.Ichecked.
”
Hercol
league’
sphonerangthenshest
oodup.“
I
shoul
dgo, wewil
ltal
kaker
e?”
“
Yeah.
”
ShewalkedoutofKenny’soffi
ce.Kennystoodup
andt
hrewawayt heremainingfoodasitlosttast
e.
Shewalkedtothebathr
oom wi t
hherhandbagwher e
shel
ookedathersel
font hemi r
ror
.Shest ar
edatthe
foldsonherneckt henjusthowt ightherbl
azerwas
onher .Sheswal l
owedt hentookoutthepr egnancy
testfrom herbagwalkinginsidethetoil
etcubi cl
e.
Shepeedoni tthenherphoner angasshecl osed
thetoiletsi
tandputthepr egnancytestont op
wai t
ing.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,ar
eyoubusy
?”
“
No.Iboughtanot
hert
estki
t.Iam sowor
ri
ed.
”
Esi
chuckled.“Youknowwhat
’sgoi
ngon,
youar
e
j
ustindenial
.”
“
ButIdidnotst
opdr
inki
ngmypi
l
lsandInev
er
missed.
”
“
Itmi
ghthav
ejusthappened.
”
“
Ther
eisnoway
….”
“
Whatdoesi
tsay
?”
“
Not
hingy
et.Let
’swai
t.
”
“Ronaisgoingt
obeov
ert
hemooni
fyouar
e
pregnant
.”
“
IfIam pr
egnanti
tmeanshedi
dsomet
hing.
”
“
Ormay
bei
twasGod.Whatdoesi
tsay
?”
Kennyslowl
ypickedi
tupandl
ookedasherhear
t
sank.Shepr
essedherli
pst
oget
herasatearr
oll
ed
downherchubbycheek.
“
Whatdoesi
tsay
?”
“
Iam pr
egnant
.”
“
Iam goi
ngt
obeanaunt
!Thi
sisGod’
sdoi
ng.
”
“
Ican’
bel
i
evet
his…”
“
Whenar
eyoucomi
ngt
hissi
de?
”
“
Todayi
smyl
astday
.Tomor
row.
”
“
Ican’
twai
ttoseey
ou.Howf
arar
eyou?
”
“
Idon’
tknow.May
beaf
ewmont
hs.
”
“Kennythisi
sexci
ti
ng,youaregoingtobeamom.
Ronaisnotgoingtoleavey
ou, t
hisisacherryontop.
Iknowyouar eworr
iedaboutyourcareerbutyoucan
sti
llwor
kev enasamom.Youhav easupporti
ve
manbesi deyouandheiswill
i
ngt odoany t
hingfor
you.”
“Ican’
tbel
iev
eIam goi
ngt
ofatandt
hickonmy
graduat
ionday.
”
“
Youar
egoi
ngt
obel
ooki
ngbeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Youar
ejustsay
ing.
”
“Iam sohappyy ouar
ecomingback.Si
nful
bosso
neaset seantsenyast
ress.
”
Kennychuckl
ed.“
Iam comi
ngt
omor
row.
”
“
Okbabes.Hubbyandt
heki
dshav
ear
ri
vedf
or
l
unch.
”
“
Ok.
”
Kennyf i
xedhersel
finfrontofthemirrort
henwalked
out.Asmi l
estart
edatthecor nerofherli
psasshe
i
magi nedRona’sreact
ion.Bontlewalkedovert
oher.
“
Hey,
Iwaslooki
ngforyou,
comeher
e,Iwantt
otal
k
t
oyouaboutsomet
hing.
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Whydoy
ousoundsoser
ious
yaana?
”
“
It
’sser
ious.
.Come.
”
Kennyswal
l
owedf
oll
owi
ngaf
terBont
le,
herhear
t
poundi
ngabi
t.Theygoti
ntheel
evat
orgoi
ngt
ofi
rst
fl
oor.
Bont
lef
oldedherar
msal
lser
ious.
“
Whatdi
dIdo?
”
“
Youwi
l
lseebuty
ourl
ett
eri
swai
ti
ngf
ory
ou.
”
“
Let
terf
orwhat
?”
“
Youwi
l
lsee.
”
Theel
evatordoor
sopenedthenhercol
l
eagues
st
art
edsingingasBont
lej
oinedi
n.

AndIknowy
ou’
regoi
ngsomewher
etomakea
Bet
terl
i
fe
Ihopet
haty
ouf
indi
tont
hef
ir
stt
ry
Andev
ent
houghi
tki
l
lsme
Thaty
ouhav
etogo
Iknowi
t’
ll
besadder
I
fyounev
erhi
tther
oad
Sof
arewel
l
Somebodyi
sgonnami
ssy
ou
Far
ewel
l
Somebodyi
sgonnawi
sht
haty
ouwer
eher
e
Thatsomebodyi
sme

Feel
i
ngemot
ional
,Kennysi
l
ent
lycr
iedwi
pingaway
hert
ear
s.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
MsEdr
war
dswalkedoverandhuggedher
.“Wear
e
goi
ngt
omissy
ou,especi
all
yme.”
Shehuggedherthenev
ery
onewal
kedov
ergi
vi
ng
heragrouphug.
“
Iam goi
ngt
omi
ssy
oual
ltoo.
”
Theysteppedbackt
henBont
lehandedheran
envel
ope.
“
Wedi
dn’
tknowwhatt
ogety
ousoweal
lthoughtof
t
his.I
t’
sat r
iptoDubai
,ever
ythi
ngpai
dfor
.Youhave
t
ouset hatvoucherwi
thi
ntwoyear
ssoplease…”
“
Thanky
ousomuch.
”
“Mr.Bat
sil
ethoughti
twouldbeagoodi
deat
odo
somethi
ngniceforyoubecausey
ouhav
ebeen
not
hingbutahardworker.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Bont
lesmi
l
ed.“
Youar
ewel
come.
”
Theycutt hecaket hengav eherapi
ece.Theyal
lat
e
andstarteddispersinggoingbacktothei
rwork
stat
ions.Mr .Bat
silewalkedov er
.
“Soyoudi
dn’
tleav
emeapi
eceoft
hecakeI
bought
?”
Theyl
aughedt
henhewal
kedov
ert
oKennysmi
l
ing.
“
Lastday
?”
Shenodded.“
Yes.
”
“
Whenar
eyoul
eav
ing?
”
“
Tomor
rowmor
ning.
”
“
Andy
ourpr
oper
ty?
”
“Al
readywenttoShakawe.Ican’
ttaket
hatwi
thme
backtoGaborone.
”
“
Ok.Thecompany’
str
ucksar
egoingtoGaborone,
I
t
houghtyoumi
ghtwantfr
eet
ranspor
tat
ionofyour
t
hings.
”
“
Thankyoubuti
twon’tbenecessar
y.Theonl
ythi
ng
l
efti
sthebedwhi
chisleav
ingtomorrowmorni
ng.
”
“Iam fly
ingt
oGabor oneinanhour,howabouty ou
comewi t
h?Yourcarwill
foll
owwi t
hthecompany
trucks.Andbeforey
ougetaheadofy oursel
f,Iknow
youar einarel
ati
onshipandIrespectthat.These
day swhenyout r
ybeingniceyouareaccusedof
things.
”
Kennyl
aughedembar
rassed.“
Ithappenedonce.
”
“Idon’tsleepwithmyi nt
ernsorevenempl oyees.
That’snott hekindofbossIam.May bei fyouwere
notani nternatmycompanybutt hemomenty ou
walkedi nthroughthosedoors,whatev erthought
sI
haddi ed.So…don’ tyouwanttosurprisehi m?Free
l
ift.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Iwoul
dlov
eto.
”
“
Gohome, comebackwithy
ourbagsthenyouleav
e
y
ourcarhere,
theywi
ll
takei
t.Bequi
ckthough.
”
“
Ok.Thanky
ouMr
.Bat
sil
e.”
Kennyrushedbacktoheroffi
cethengrabbedher
bagandwal kedoutcal
li
ngRonabuthisphonerang
unanswered.Shejumpedinhercaranddrovehome
fi
guri
nghewasi nameet i
ng.

*
**

Tshenol
oparkedthecarinsideherparent
’syar
d
whichwasfil
l
edwi t
hrel
atives.Shesteppedoutthen
hermotherwalkedover
.
“
ThankGod!Comeher
e.”
Herauntwal
kedov
ert
oo.“
Mony
adi
!”
Nol
osmi
l
ed.“
Howar
eyouaunt
y?”
“
Iam f
ine.Iam sohappyf
ory
ou.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Becareful
onthisday.Any
thi
ngcanhappen.Don’
t
j
ustdr
inkfr
om anyone.”
“
Eemma.
”
Nolowalkedi
nsi
dethehousewithhermothergoi
ng
toherr
oom.Shelockedthedoorthenl
ookedather
daught
er.
“
Iwaswai
ti
ngf
ory
out
oar
ri
vef
rom Gabor
one.
”
“
Isev
ery
thi
ngok?
”
“Ihear
dthatKgosi
’
sf at
heri
sthepast
oratchur
ch,
areyounotbei
ngforcedtodothi
s?”
Tshenol
osmil
ed.“
No.MamaIl
oveKgosi
somuch.I
l
ovehim somuch.
”
Hermot herlookedather
.“Ij
ustwantyoutoknow
thatsometimest hi
schur
chpeoplearenotwhatt
hey
seem tobe.”
“IknowKgosi
,Iknowev
ery
thi
ng,
IknowwhatIam
getti
ngmysel
fint
o.”
“
Ok.I
fyousayso.I
fyouhappent
ochangey
our
mind,y
oucanal
way st
ellme.Yourf
atherandIwi
l
l
cancel
ify
ousaytheword.”
“
Don’
tcancel
.Iam soexci
ted.
”
“
Ok.St
ayher
e,Iwi
l
lbr
ingy
ouf
ood.
”
Shenodded,
hermot
herwal
kedoutasshecal
l
ed
Kenny
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,di
dyougetmymessage?
”
“
Yes,
Iam sohappyf
ory
ou.
”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evet
hisi
shappeni
ng.
”
“
Iam f
lyi
ngt
oGabs,
Iam pr
egnant
.”
“
What
?”
“
Don’
tjudgemewenaJudgeJudy
!”
Tshenol
olaughed.“
Idon’
tjudgepeopl
eany
mor
e.So
howfarareyou?”
“Iam notsure,acoupleofmonths,Ihaven’
tseenmy
peri
odinal ongwhile.Iam goi
ngtosurpri
seRona.
Hehasbeent al
ki
ngabouthav i
ngababyf orawhil
e
now.
”
“
From her
ehei
sgoi
ngt
omar
ryy
ou.
”
“
Eishwenamma…”
“
May
bewecanev
enhav
edoubl
eweddi
ngs.
”
Kennylaughed.“Don’
tgetmeexci t
ed,maybehe
won’tproposethenIgetheartbr
oken.Iam walki
ng
i
nsidetheairpor
t.Wewillt
alk.Goodluckl
ove.”
“
Thanks.
”
Kennyhungupt
henNol
olai
donherbedhappi
l
y.

*
**

I
nGaborone,Kennywal
kedoutoft
heai
rpor
twhi
l
e
Nat
edraggedherbags.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
Shel
ookedathim put
ti
ngawayherphone.“
Hei
snot
pi
cki
nghisphone.
”
“
May
behei
sbusy
,somet
imesi
thappens.Iwi
l
ldr
op
y
ouof
f.
”
“
Youdon’
thav
eto.
”
“
Iinsi
st,
byt
heway,i
fyouwantaj
ob,don’
thesi
tat
e
t
ocomeback.Thedoori
sal
waysopenforyou.
”
“
Thanky
ouMr
.Bat
sil
e.”
“
Nat
e.Iam noty
ourbossany
mor
e.”
Shelaughedgetti
ngint
hecarwhi l
eheputherbags
i
nt heboot.Hejumpedinthendroveoutofthe
air
portpar
kinglot
.Shedir
ectedhimtoAr ona’
s
house.Awhi l
elat
erheparkedatthegate,Kenny
fr
ownedst ari
ngathi
snewcarbesi dewhatseemed
tobeaBMW X6.
“
Shoul
dpr
esst
hehoot
er?
”
“No.Thankyousomuchf orev
ery
thi
ngandIam
sorr
yforassumingt
hings.
”
Hesmiled.“
Goodl
uckKenei
l
we.Iwi
l
lgety
our
bags.
”
Kennysteppedouttaki
ngoutthegater
emotef
rom
herbagthenpressedit
.Thegatesl
idopen,
Nat
e
draggedherbagstothedoor
.
“
Bye!
”
“
Bye…”
Shewat chedasher eversedthendr oveof f.Kenny
walkedt ot hedoorandopenedi tdraggingherbags
i
nside.Shel ookedatthecandl esl i
talloverthe
sitt
ingroom wi throsesont hef loor,apicnicsetup
ont hefloorwhi leJessieWar epl ay
ed.Shesmi led
tearful
lywonder i
nghowheknewshewascomi ng.
Kennysetherbagsasi destaringatt hebot tl
eof
winet henshet ookoffherheal sandherbl azer.She
slowlyfollowedt herosepet al
st hatwer eleadingto
thebedr oom.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons

#39

Kennypausedt hentookoffthepinsof fherhairand

l
etitlose.Shewentbackt othesit
tingroom then
tookouthercompactf ixi
ngherli
pst i
ck.Shesniffed
herarmpi t
sthentookherper f
umeandspr ayedabi t
onher sel
fbefor
etakingadeepbr eathunableto
containherexci
tementandwentf ort hebedroom
doorwhi l
eJessieWar esangsoft
ly.Shemov edthe
knobt oopenthedoorbutt henfr
ownedr eal
i
zingi t
wasl ocked.
“
Babe!Rona!
”
Sheknockedont
hedoor
.“Rona!
”
Sheknockedont hedoorthenwentbacktothe
sit
ti
ngroom taki
ngherphoneswitchi
ngoffthe
music.Shewalkedbacktothebedroom doorcal
l
ing
him.Shefrownedli
steni
ngashisphoneranginsi
de
thebedroom.Sheknockedonthedoor.
“
Rona!
”
Thecallcut
,shetri
edcal
li
ngagainbutthi
sti
methe
cal
ldidn’
tgetthr
ough.Herhear
tstar
tedpoundi
ng
uncontr
oll
ably
.
“
Rona!Opent
hedoor
!What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Iam openi
ng.Wai
t…”
Shepausedthenwaited.Heopenedthedoor
secondslat
erthenhesmiledwalki
ngoutoft
he
bedroom cl
osi
ngthedoorbehindhim.
“
Heybabe…”
Shel
ookedathi
m conf
used.“
Whatwer
eyoudoi
ng?
”
“
Iwast
aki
ngashower
.”
“
Wit
hthedoorl
ocked?
”
“
Idi
dn’
treal
i
zei
twasl
ocked.
”
Kennysmil
edhuggi
nghi
m.“Ok…Thi
sisbeaut
if
ul.
.
howdidyouknowIwascoming?
”
“
Uhh…-
“
“
Idi
dn’
ttel
lany
onet
houghIt
ri
edcal
l
ingy
oubuty
ou
werenotpickingsoIt
houghtIwouldj
ustsur
pri
se
you.Iam pregnant
.If
oundouttoday.
”
“
What
?”
“
Iam pr
egnant
!”
Shelookedathi
m ashest
art
edbackather
,
speechl
ess.
“
Greatnewsr
ight
?”
“
Wowy
ah…”
Sheexcitedlyhuggedhi
m.“Iknowy
ouhavebeen
wantingthisforawhil
enow.Youar
egoi
ngtobea
greatfat
her.”
“
Wow!
”
Shecuriouslylookedatt herosepet alsl
eadi ngtothe
bedroom.“Shal lIseewhat ’
sinthere?Ican’ tbeli
eve
youdidallthis.Thegi r
lsatworkmusthav et oldyou!
Thanky ou,Iwasn’ texpect
ingthis.Iloveyouso
muchRona. ”Shest oodonhert oest henkissedhim.
“Iam sohappyIam back.Imi ssedy ou.
”
“
Metoo.Giv
emeami nut
e,l
etmef
ixsomet
hing
t
henyoucancomei
n.”
“
What
?”
“
It
’sasur
pri
se.Goandwaitf
ormeint
hesi
tt
ing
r
oom.Letmeperfectt
hesur
pri
se.
”
Shel
aughed.“
Ok.Bequi
ck.Iam socur
ious.
”
Hewalkedbackinthebedroom lockingbehindhi
m.
Kennywentbacktothesit
tingroom call
ingoneof
hercl
oseworkmatesatSmar tLi
feInsurance.
“
Kenny
…”
“
Hey,soyouguy
stol
dRonaIwoul
dbecomi
ng
t
oday
? ”
“
What
?”
“KanaIcoul
dn’
tgetholdofhim,It
houghtIwas
goingt
osurpri
sehi
m butIgotthesurpr
ise.Thank
yousomuch.Youguy sarethebest
.”
“
Whatar
eyout
alki
ngaboutKenny
?”
“
Didn’
tyout
ell
RonaIwascomi
ngt
oday
?”
“
Youal
readyl
eft
?”
“
Yes,
Mr.Bgotmeaf
li
ghtt
ickett
oGabs.
”
“
Idi
dn’
tknowthat.It
houghtyouwer
el eav
ing
t
omorrow.Matt
eroffact
,ever
yonet
hinkyouare
l
eav
ingtomorr
ow.”
“
Ial
readyl
eft
.”
“
Noi
twasn’
tusbabes.
”
Kennyf
rownednowconf
used.
“
Uhok.
”
“
Wel
lIhopey
ouenj
oyy
oursur
pri
se.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Yeah,
thanks.
”
Kennyhungupt hensatdownwonder ingi
fTshenolo
wast heonebutshewasi nShakawe,shedidn’
teven
haveRona’ snumber.Kenny’
seyesfel
lontheheels
onthef luf
fycar
petwherethepi
cnicwassetupt hen
shest oodupandpickedtheshoesjustasRona
walkedov er.
Shelookedathi
m,herhear
tpoundi
ng.“
Who’
sshoes
aret
hese?”
“
Iboughtt
hem f
ory
ou.
”
Kennyl
ookedatt
hem.“
Forme?
”
“
Yeah…don’
tyoul
i
ket
hem?
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Theyar
eni
ce.ButIwearsi
ze5not4.
”
“
Size5l
ookedt
oobi
gfory
ou.
”
Shetr
iedtheheelsforci
ngt
hem onbutt
heywer
e
toosmall
.“Theyaretoosmall
.”
“
Wewi
l
lchanget
hem.
”
“
Thanky
ou.Howdi
dyouknowIwascomi
ng?
”
“Thatdoesn’
tmat
ter
,whatmat
ter
sist
haty
ouar
e
here.
”
Heputhi
shandsonherwai
stt
heki
ssedher
.
“
Iam sohappyt
oseey
ou.
”
Unabl
etoshakeofft
hefeel
i
ngt hatwassuddenl
y
suppr
essi
ngherchest
,shefor
cedasmi l
ethen
l
ookedaroundt
hehouse.
“
Met
oo.
”
Shel
ookedinhi
seyessl
ightl
yshaki
ng.“
Rona…
what
’sgoi
ngon?Somethingisgoi
ngon.
”
“
Whatdoy
oumean?
”
Tear
sfil
l
edhereyes.“Icanfeelit
.Somet hi
ngi
sof
f.
NoonetoldyouIwascomi ng,nooneknewIwas
comingtoday
.NotevenEsi sothereisnowayyou
woul
dhav eknown.Nooneatt heof f
iceknew.
”
“
ButIgotacal
lfr
om oneoft
hem.
”
“
Who?
”
“
Kennywhat’
sgoingon?Ididal
lthi
sfory
ou?Who
woul
dIdoitf
orifnotyou?
”
Shelookedi
nhi
sey
esr
emai
ningcal
m.“
Whocal
l
ed
you?
”
“
Idon’
tknow,
Idi
dn’
task.
”
“
Letmeseet
hei
rnumber
.Cal
lthem back.
”
“Areyouseri
ousrightnow?Don’ tr
uint
his.Ihave
biggerpl
ansforustonight.Ihav
ebeenwai ti
ngf or
thisdayformonthsnow…”Hewentdownonhi s
kneethentookoutther i
ng.Kenny’
sheartskippedas
shelookedatit
.
“Idon’tt
hinkIhav
etheright
fulwords…Ifel
li
nlove
beforeyoubecamemi neandsincethenIhaveloved
youmor ewi t
heachday.Iwanttospendtherestof
myli
fewit
hyoubecauseIcan’
timagi
nemyl
i
fe
wi
thouty
ou.Wil
lyoupleasemarr
yme?”
Kennyputherhandonhermout
h,herhear
tbeat
ing
sofast
.
“
Please…”
Tear
sfi
l
ledherey
est
hendr
oppedt
ohercheeks.“
Oh
myGod!Yes…”
Ronasl
i
dt her
ingonherfi
ngerasshecr
ied.Hegot
upandhuggedhert
ight
ly.
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evet
his…”
“
Iloveyou.Iknewy
ouwerecomi
ng.Ipr
eparedt
his
i
nanhourbecauseIknewyouwoul
dwalkinany
minut
e.”
Shelookedatherr
ingwithasmil
e.“
Iam so
over
whelmed.Ilov
ey ou.Il
ovey
ousomuch.”
Ronakissedher
.“Il
oveyoutoo.Iwoul
dpoury
outhe
winebutletmegetj
uicenowthatJuni
ori
sonhis
way.”
Shechuckl
edt
ear
ful
l
y.“
Ok.
”
Kennypi
ckedherr
ingi
ngphone.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
…ar
eyouhomeal
ready
?”
“
Esi
Ronapr
oposed.
”
“
Fucky
es!
”
Kennylaughed.“
Iam sohappy
.Iam shaki
ngr
ight
now.”
“
Iam happyf
ory
out
ool
ove.OhmyGodIcan’
twai
t
f
ort
his.”
“
Itol
dhi
m.”
“
Doubl
ebl
essi
ngs.Ican’
twai
ttoseey
ou,
Iwi
sh
t
omorr
owcanjustcomenow.”
“
Iam her
e.If
lew.
”
“
OhmyGod…hemusthav
ebeensosur
pri
sed.
”
“
ItseemedheknewIwascomi
ngand…”
Kennylookedatwhatl
ookedl
i
keapantyjustnear
thecouch.Shesl
owlywal
kedoverandpi
ckeditup.
“
Kenny
.”
“
Ther
eisat
hong…”
“
Awhat
?”
“
Athong.
”
Ronawal
kedov erhol
dingaglassofjui
ce,
hef
roz
e
st
ari
ngatherholdi
ngtheblackthong.
“
Who’
sthongi
sthi
s?”
“
Babe…Icanexpl
ain.
”
Kenny
’shear
tpoundedsomuchasshel
ookedat
hi
m.“Who’sthongi
sthi
s?”
“
List
en…”
Herli
psst
art
edtr
embl
i
ng,
shel
ookedathi
m,her
ski
nburni
nghot
.
“
Kenny
!”Esishout
edonthephonethenshedropped
i
tandt
riedgoingt
othebedr
oom butAronaheldher
.
“
Wai
t…”
“
Who’sher
e?Someonei
sher
e….Thi
s…i
t’
snotf
or
me.Who’
shere?
”
“
Letmeexpl
ain…”
Shetr
iedpushi
nghi
m outoft
hewaybuthewasn’
t
budgi
ng.
“
Cany
ouwai
t…”
“
Whoi
sher
e!?Iknowt
her
eissomeoneher
e.”
“
It
’snotwhaty
out
hink.
”
Kennymov edbackshaki
ng,shelookedattheknife
onhispicni
csetupthenpickeditupandlaunchedit
athi
m stabbinghi
schest
.Ar onagruntedt
henKenny
hurr
iedtothebedr
oom.Sheopenedt hedoorthen
fr
oze,kneesweak.

*
**

Esi
’shear
tpoundedasshest
ruggl
edt
ofi
ndher
shoes.
“
Babewhat
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Somethi
ngisgoingonwithRona.Iaskedyouabout
i
tandwhatdidyousay?Kennysaystherei
sathong
i
nthehouse.I
shecheati
ng?Afterever
ythi
ngheis
cheat
ing?
”
“Ev
eni fheis…i
t’
snonofourbusi
ness.Lett
hem sor
t
outtheirmess.
”
Esi
lookedathi
m.“
Kennywon’
tbeabl
etohandl
eit
.”
“
Kennyi
sagr
ownwomanandshecanhandl
eit
.”
“
Whyareyousocal
m?Doy
ouknowwhat
’sgoi
ngon?
I
shecheat
ing?
”
“No.Butcanyouj
ustletthem sol
vet hei
rissueson
thei
rown?IknowyouseeKennyasy oursisterbut
ther
eisnoneedforyoutobet here.Kennyi sgoing
tocall
youandtel
lyouwhat ’
sgoingonandi fshe
needsyou,shewi
llcal
lyou.”
Esil
ookedathi
m sadl
y.“
Hei
scheat
ingonheri
sn’
t
he?
”
“
Idon’
tknowbabe.
”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evet
his.
”
Esipi
ckedherphonet
hentri
edcal
li
ngKennybuther
numberwasjustri
ngi
ngunanswer
ednow.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#40

Kenny’sheartpoundedsofastandhar dagainsther
chestasshel ookedatt
heladyseatedont hebed
naked.Herthroatdri
edupwhileherinsidestwist
ed
painf
ull
y.Painchockedherasshest oodt heref
roze
toherspot
“
Who…who-
whoar
eyou?
”
Thewomanst oodupandf
li
ppedherl
onghair
behi
nd.“
Rona!Comesortt
hisout
.Idon’
thav
e
ener
gyfort
his.”
“
Whoar
eyou?Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”
ShepickedupRona’ st-
shir
tandputitonunbot hered
byKenny ’
spresence.Ronawalkedi
n, t
heknifeof f
hi
sshirt.Hiscompanionlookedatt
hebl oodstainon
hi
st-
shir t
.
“
Whathappened?
”
“
Pleasel
eav
e.”
“Iam notgoi
ngany
wher
e?Di
dshest
aby
ou?Cal
lthe
poli
ce.”
Tear
sfi
l
ledKenny
’sey
es.
“
Kay
,kekopaot
samay
e.Pl
easel
eav
e.)
”
“
Wheream Igoing?Shestabbedy
ou,youneed
medi
calat
tenti
on.Andsheisnotgoi
nganywheret
il
l
t
hepoli
cereacheshere,
shehastogotojai
l.
.”
Kaypickedherphonet
hendi
aledt
hepol
i
cewhi
l
e
KennylookedRona.
“
What
’sgoi
ngonRona?
”
“
Icanexpl
ain,
let
’sgo.
”
“Iam notgoi
ngany
wher
e.Whati
sgoi
ngon?Whoi
s
she?”
“
Iam hi
sgi
rl
fr
iendy
ouf
att
hing.
”
Tearsrol
l
eddownKenny’
scheeksasherhear
t
poundedevenmor
e,herchestwasv
ibr
ati
ng.
“
Kayst
opi
t!
”
“Iam notgoi
ngtost
op,kooreyoualwayshaveto
datethi
ngs.Ihav
ecall
edthepoli
ce.Sheisgoi
ngto
j
ail
.”
Hegl
aredather
.“Shutup!
”
Kayr oll
edherey
esthensatonthebed.Kenny
l
ookedatRonat ryi
ngnottocr
ybutherheartwas
breaking.
“
Rona…what
’sgoi
ngon?Iam pr
egnant
.”
Kayl
aughed.“
Pregnant
.Whatawow!Youar
ewhat
?”
Shestoodup.“
IfIwer
ey ouIwoul
dabor
tthatt
hing
becausesweet
y,Iam back.
”
“
Kayst
op.
”
“
No,Iam notgoi
ngt ostop,notwhenshestabbed
y
ou.Iwaswill
ingtorespectthefactt
hatshe
t
houghtshecouldrepl
acemebutnotany mor e.“
“
IAM HI
SGI
RLFRI
END!
”
“Gi
rlf
ri
end?Honey,youar
enothingtohi
m.Ebil
ekana
Iheardyouboughtheracarwasti
ngmoney.Youare
goingtotakebackt
hatcar.
”
Ronat
ookKenny
’shand.“
Let
’sgo.
”
“
Iam notgoi
ngany
wher
eti
l
lyout
ell
what
’sgoi
ngon.
Who’
sshe?
”
“
Iwi
l
lexpl
ainev
ery
thi
ng.
”
Kaycl
osedthedoorthenlockedit
.“Nooneis
l
eavi
ngti
llt
hepoli
cearri
ves.Sheisgoingt
ojail
.She
i
snotgoingtogetawaywi t
hit.
”
“
Kaybul
alebat
i!(
Opent
hedoor
.)
”
“
Iam notopeni
ngt
hedoor
,shedeser
vest
ogot
o
j
ail
.”
Kennyl
ookedaroundthenwal
kedovert
othedr
awer
shesawthegunthelastt
imeshewasheret
hen
tooki
tout
.
“Noonei
swal ki
ngoutofher
eali
ve!
”Tear
sfi
l
led
downhercheeksasshecri
ed.“
Rona…”
Kayl
ookedathergr
abbi
ngRona’
st-
shi
rt
.
“
Babeputthatdown.Let’
st al
kaboutt
his.I
t’
snot
whaty
outhink.Iam notcheati
ng.
”
“
Whyar
eyoul
yi
ngt
ome?
”
“
Shej
ustcame.Iswearshej
ustcame.
”
“
Youar
ely
ing!Youar
ely
ing!
”
“Hedoesn’
twanty ou,i
fyoupull
thetr
iggeryouare
goingt
ojai
l f
ortherestofyourl
if
eandy ourchi
l
dwi l
l
growupinjail
.”
“
Onemor
ewor
dfr
om y
ouandIam goi
ngt
osl
ap
y
ou!
”
Kaykeptqui
etasRonalookedatherdar
inghert
o
saysomethi
ng.Shef
oldedherarmsstandi
ngbeside
Rona.
“
Kennyl
etmeexpl
ain…”
“I
sthi
swhatIget
?Youcheat
ingonme?Whatdi
dI
dowrong?Di
dIdosomethi
ngwrong?Who’
sshe?
”
“Shejustcamet oday .Ididn’tsleepwi thher.This
entir
esetupwasf ory ou.Ihadgot teny ouaplane
ti
cketbecauseIwant edtopr oposet onight
,Ican
showy outhepl ateti
cket.Shecamei nthentri
ed
seducingme.Shet ookof fhercl othes.Wewer ei
n
thesitt
ingroom theent i
ret i
met henIsawy ou.I
panickedandt ookhert ot hebedr oom.Iwoul dnev er
cheatony ou.Notaf t
ersomuchwehav ebeen
throughtogether.Il
ov eyou.Il ovey ousomuch. ”
Kennycr
ied.“
Youar
ely
ing!Youar
ely
ing.
”
“
Heel
ammahedoesn’
twant
-“
“
Shutup!
”
“
Youcr
azybi
tch!Iam notgoi
ngt
o-“
Kennypulledthet
ri
ggerandshother .Therewas
sil
encetheybothstaredatKay,herhandonher
stomachwher eshewasbl eedi
ng.Sheslowlyfel
lto
theground.Kennybreathedheavi
lyholdi
ngthegun.
“Shi
t!
”Aronaknel
tbeforeherandputhi
shandon
herwoundtostopbleedi
ng.“Fuck!
”
Kennyswall
owedst
ari
ngatKayont
hegr
ound
unconsci
ous.
“
Kay
…shi
t!
”
“
Stepawayf
rom her
…”
“
Babe…”
“
STEPAWAYFROM HER!
”
Ronaslowl
ygotupandlookedather.“
Youhaveto
bel
iev
eme.Ididn’
tsl
eepwithher.Iwoul
dnever,I
l
oveyou.Shej
ustcameinIswear …babeyouknow
me…”
Kennyshookherheadcry
ing.“
Ilov
edyou…Ilov
ed
you…Ididever
ythi
ngyouwantedtodo….Whatwas
missi
ng?Whatwasmi ssi
ngRona?”
“Ididn’
tsl
eepwi thher
.Pl
easebeli
eveme…Ididn’
t
sleepwithher.Ihavenev
erlookedatanyot
her
womanwho’ snotyou.Tr
ustme.Iloveyou,
onl
y
you.”
“Youarely
ing.Youdidn’
tevenwantt
opr opose…you
didi
tbecausey ouweretr
yingt
odist
ractme.How
couldyoudothistome?Youknowhowi tfeel
stobe
cheated…howcouldy oudothi
stome? ”
Hi
sphonerangfr
om thebedthenhet
ookastep
f
orwar
d,Kennyshott
hewall.“
STAYTHERE!
”
Sheslowlyt
ookthephoneandansweredhi
s
brot
her’
scallput
ti
ngi
tonloudspeaker
.
“
Rona?I
sev
ery
thi
ngok?Esi
iswor
ri
edher
e..
”
“
Wear
egood.
”
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Iwi
l
lcal
lyoul
ater
.”
“
Esi
want
stospeakt
oKenny
.”
“
Kenny
?Hel
l
o?Kennyar
eyouok?
”
“
Iam f
ine.Iam f
ineMoesi
.Wewi
l
lcal
lbackl
ater
.”
“
Okbut-”Shehungupandputthephonedown.Rona
l
ookedatKaylyi
ngiunapool
ofblood.
“
Shei
sgoi
ngt
odi
e.”
Kennylookedatherthenbackathi
m shaki
ng.“You
coul
dhav edumpedme.Youcoul dhavebrokenup
wit
hme.Iwoul dhav
eneverref
used.Ther
ewasno
needforallt
his.”
Tear
sf i
l
ledRona’
sey
es.“
Idi
dn’
tdoany
thi
ngI
swear…”
“
Youdi
d…y
oudi
d…wasi
tnecessar
y?”
“
Ilov
eyou.
.Gi
vemet
hegun.
”
“
Youcomecl
oserIam goi
ngt
oki
l
lyou.
”
Therewasaloudknockonthedoor
,Kennyf
rowned
l
ist
eningt
ofootst
epsoutsi
de.
“
Isev
ery
thi
ngoki
nther
e?I
t’
sthepol
i
ce.
”
Kennyl
ookedatRonapoi
nti
ngt
hegunathi
m.
“
Iam goi
ngt
ogot
ojai
lbecauseofy
ou…”
“Gi
vemethegun…wewi
l
lsayi
t’
sme.Youdon’
t
havet
ogotojai
l.
”
Kennyshookherhad“
Youar
ely
ing.
”
“I
nam not.Iwi
l
ltaket
hef
all
.Youwon’
tgot
ojai
l
.
Givemethegunbabe.
”
“
Wear
ebr
eaki
ngt
hedoor
!It
’st
hepol
i
ce!
”
Kennymov
edbackshaki
ngl
ooki
ngar
ound.

*
**

Outsi
deaspeci
alagenthel
dagunst
ari
ngi
nsi
det
he
house.
“
It
’saf
emal
e…shei
swi
tht
hegun.
”
Hi
scol
l
eaguel
ookedathi
m.“
What
?”
“
Yeah…It
hinki
fwet
alkt
ohershewi
l
ldr
opi
t.
”
“Don’tpl
aywit
hascornedwoman.Shewasprobabl
y
beingcheat
edon.Ri
ghtnowsheisnott
hinki
ng
cl
ear
ly,
shecanki
l
lhi
m.”
“
Letmet
ryt
ocal
m herdown.
”

*
**

I
nsi
det
hebedr
oom,
Kennyl
ookedatKay
.
“
Isshedead?
”
Ronal
ookedathert
henshookhi
shead.“
No.Babe
gi
vemethegun.”
Shel
ookedatt
hedoorast
heyhi
titwi
thf
orce.
“
StepawayorIam shoot
ing!St
epaway
!”
Av oi
cef
rom t
hewi
ndowspoket
oher.“
Hi…canyou
hearme.Mynamei
sSean.What
’sy
ourname?”
Kennymov
edf
rom t
hewi
ndow.
“
Look,
Icanhel
pyou.
.,
what
’sy
ourname?
”
“
Kenny
.”
“Kenny,l
i
stent
ome,Idon’
tknowwhat ’
sgoi
ngon
butit
’snotwor
thy
ougoingtojai
lfor
.Youcanst
il
l
walkoutofthi
sandgoonwi t
hy ourl
i
fe.Itdoesn’
t
havetobemessy.Areyouli
steni
ngtome?Iwi l
ltel
l
every
onetodroptheguns,
everyonewalksoutof
hereali
ve.
”
“
Shei
sdead…Iam goi
ngt
ojai
l
.”
“
Ther
eissomeoneel
se?
”
“
Iam goi
ngt
oki
l
lmy
sel
f…”
Mucusrandownherl
ipsassheshookhol
dingthe
gunwit
hshaki
nghands.Ronal
ookedatherseethi
ng
i
npain.
“
Giv
emet
hegunbabe…Iam sor
ry.
”
Sheshookherheadandst
art
edcr
ying.
“Kenny…it
’sSean,
li
stent
ome…Ineedy
outowalk
outofthereal
iv
eok?Youaregoi
ngt
ohavet
odrop
thegun.”
“
Idon’
twantt
ogot
ojai
l
…”
“
Youdon’
thav
eto-
“
Theypushedthedoorsohar
dthatthescr
ewsfl
ew
andthedooropened.Themenholdi
nggunswal
ked
i
n.
“
Gamei
sov
er,
putt
hegundown!
”
KennylookedatRonathenmov
edfor
ward.Asol
dier
onstandbyshothert
henshedr
oppedthegunf
all
i
ng.
Ronaranovert
oherthent
urnedheraround.Kenny
openedhermoutht
osaysomethingthenbloodfil
l
ed
hermouth.
“
Babeno…no…”
Seanwalkedin.“
Fuck!Whydi
dyoushoot!Shewas
surr
ounded!Hergamewasover,
youdidn’thav
eto
shoother
.”

(
(Copy
right@2021byFezMat
siki
ti
.+26775447725
Allr
ightsreser ved:Nopar tofthisbookshallbe
repr
oduced, di
stribut
ed,orusedi nanyform orby
anymeans, electroni
c,photocopy i
ng,mechanical
l
y
orotherwise, withoutthepriorwrit
tenpermissi
onof
theauthor.Anyper sonwhodoesunaut hori
zed
worksinr elati
ont othispublicat
ionwil
lbeli
ableto
cri
minal prosecut i
on.)
)
*
**

Esipar
kedhercarout si
dest
ari
ngatthepol
icecars
andthetwoambul ancespar
kedout
sidethegate.
Herheartpoundedsomuchassher ushedover
.
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
Apol
i
ceof
fi
cerst
oppedher
.“Whoar
eyou?
”
“
Mybr
otheri
n-l
awi
sinsi
det
her
e.What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Justwai
there…Ther
ewer
egunshot
sthatwenton
i
nsi
dethehouse.
”
Esil
ookedattheparamedi
csrushi
nginsi
deasher
kneesgotweak.Shetookoutherr
ingi
ngphone.
“
Babe,
wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
Ther
eisshoot
ingthatwentonatRona’ shouse.I
t
oldy
ousomethingwaswr ong.Iam scared…”
“
Fuckwhat
?”
Thepar
amedi
csst
eppedoutwi
thal
adyona
st
ret
cher
.Esi
lookedatKayandshookherhead.
“
No…Kenny
!”
“
Esi
what
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Kayi
sher
e!”
“
Fuck!
”
Herhear
tpoundedsomuchasotherparamedi
cs
wal
kedoutwithKennyont
hest
retcher
.
“Whathappenedt
oher?Issheok?Kenny
?Kenny
!Is
sheok?Kenny!What
’sgoingon?
”
Amanwal
kedov
erhol
dingagunt
henl
ookedather
.
“
Hi,
Iam Sean,
whoar
eyou?
”
“
Esi
…”
“
Esi
,howdoy
ouknowKenny
?”
“
Wear
efr
iends.Shei
sdat
ingmybr
otheri
n-l
aw.
”
“
Ok.Kennywasshotdown,shehel
dy ourbrot
heri
n-
l
awhostageaf
tershoot
inghi
ssidechick.
”
Esi
putherhandsonherf
acecr
ying.“
Noo…”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Isshedead?
”
“
No.Noshei
snot
.Cal
m down.
”
Thr
eemor eparamedi
cswal
kedoutwi
thRonaal
so
onthest
retcher
.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#41

Esit
urnedr
unni
ngtoherthenjumpedinstar
tingthe
engi
neasherphonerang.Sheswi
pedthescreen
answeri
ngwhi
leherhandsshookuncont
roll
ably.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Babewhat
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
KennyshotKayandhel
dRonahost
age.
”
“
What
?”
“
Shewasshott
oo.
”
“
Fuck!
”
“
Didy
ouknow?
”
“
What
?”
“
Didy
ouknow?
”
“
No.
”
“
Arey
oul
yi
ngt
omer
ightnow?
”
“
Comeonbabe…”
“
No,
Iam j
oki
ngr
ightnow.Di
dyouknow?
”
“
No.
”
“Ihopeyouaretel
li
ngt hetrut
h.Ican’
tbeli
eveRona
woulddothis.Iam sohurt.Ifeel
li
kecryi
ng.My
hearti
sbroken.Shemi ghtgot oj
ail
andallforwhat
?
Amanwhoi snotserious?It’
snotworthi
t.”
“
Babecal
m down.
”
Esi
’sli
pst
rembl
edt
henputherhandsov
erherf
ace
cry
ing.
“Ican’
tbelievethi
s.Iam real
l
yhurt.Kennyhadso
muchwai t
ingforher…Shehadabr i
ghtfutur
e
waiti
ngf orher.Sheworkedsohar dMaat l
afor
everyt
hingt ogodrownthedr ai
n.”
“
Shei
sgoi
ngt
obef
ine.Wher
ear
eyouheaded?
”
“Iam goi
ngt ot
hehospital
.Iam sosad.Iam
scared…ifanyt
hinghappenstoher…”
“
Don’
tcr
y.Don’
tcr
yok,
Kennyi
sgoi
ngt
obef
ine.
”
“
Youdon’
tknowt
hatandwhati
sget
ti
ngmeangr
yis
t
hefactt
haty
oual
way
sknow.Youknewandy
ouar
e
l
yi
ngtome.”
“
Iam notl
yi
ng.Ir
eal
l
ydi
dn’
tknow.
”
Sheangril
yhungupt
hendr
oveof
ffol
l
owi
ngt
he
ambulance.

*
**

Mothusihel
dhissoninhishandswhi l
ewat chi
ngTV.
HelookedatLefawhowaspeacef ull
ysleepingthen
carr
iedhi
mt othebedroom wherehelaidhim down
i
nhiscoat.Hesighedthenwalkedouttothesi t
ti
ng
room.Hef r
ownedattheknockont hedoor.
Thabanglookedathi
m asheopenedt
hedoor
.“O
shar
plait
aka?”
Mothusi
walkedoutwit
hhi
mthent
heyst
oodi
nfr
ont
ofhi
scar.“
Iam good.
”
“
Whatdi
dshesay
?’
“
Not
hing.
”
“
Tobehonesty ouwer en’
tfai
ronherespeci
all
yon
t
heassets.Iknowshecheat edonyoubutsheat
l
eastdeserv
edsomet hingforbei
ngwit
hy ouwhen
y
ouwer eatyourlowest.”
“Ifshedidn’tcheatonmethiswouldhav ebeena
peacefuldivorcebutshedeci
dedot her
wise,al
lthe
hurtfulwordsshesaidtomest i
l
l pl
ayinmyhead.
Sheev enhadt hegutstowalkaroundthemal l
holdinghandsebi l
emothakawatengal erude.(and
theguywasr ude.)
”
“
Iknowbutshedeser
vedsomet
hing.
”
“
Shedoesn’
tdeser
veany
thi
ngshedi
dn’
tbuy
.”
“
Buthowar
eyouhel
a?”
“Iam f
ine.Reli
evedactual
ly.If
eel free.Iam goi
ngto
star
tmybusi nessnow, dosomet hingf ormyson.
ThenextwomanIf al
lfor,Iam goingt oloveher
.”
Thabangsmi
l
ed.“
Ican’
twai
ttoseeher
.”
Theychatt
edf orawhil
et henhefi
nal
lywal
kedback
i
nsidethehouse.Hewat chedTVforawhilet
hen
fr
ownedatt hesil
encewonder i
ngi
fthenannywas
al
readysleeping.Hewalkedtoherroom and
knockedwalkingin.Nanaoquickl
ystoodupinher
shortni
ghtdressthenpickedhergownandputiton.
“
Sir
…”
Mot
husicl
ear
edhert
hroat
.“Whydon’
tyouev
er
wat
chTV?”
“
Sir
?”
“
Kengosalebel
eTV(Whydon’
tyouwat
chTV)or
y
oudon’
tli
kewatchi
ngTV?
”
“
Ido.
”
“
Thenwhydon’
tIev
erseey
ouwat
chi
ngTV?
”
Shelookeddown.“
Idon’
twantyoutothi
nkallIdois
watchTVwheny oupaymetolookaft
eryourson.”
“Youar epar tofthi
sf amil
y,stopbehav inglikea
stranger.Youcanwat chTVi fyouwant ,aslongas
Lefaisnotcr yi
ngorsomet hing,youcanwat chTV.
Youcaneati nthesit
tingr
oom wi thme.Noneedt o
sitinthekitchen.WhenIcomehome, itdoesn’ t
meany oushoul dsleeporsithere,justrelax.Iam
notamonst eroram I ?”
Nanaol
ookeddownshaki
ngherhead.“
Nosi
r.
”
“
Andst
opcal
l
ingmesi
r,Iam Mot
husi
.”
“
Eer
ra.
”
“
Youcancomeandwat
chTV.
”
“
It
’sok,
Iwasaboutt
o-“
“
Comeandwat
chTV.
”
“
Yessi
r…y
es.
”
“
Saymyname.
”
“
Mot
husi
.”
“
Whyareyoulookingdown?Kengosant
ebehel
a?
(
Whycan’
ty oulookatme?)”
Hewalkedov ert
oherandti
lt
edherchinthenlooked
ather
.Shewasdar kski
nnedyetbeaut
iful
.Hershort
wavyhairseemedli
keitwasrel
axedbutthenit
wasn’
t.Hesighed.
“
Comeandwat
chTV.Noneedt
obescar
edok?
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Let
’sgo.
”
Sheputonhershoest
henwalkedwit
hhimt othe
si
tt
ingroom wher
eshesatonthesi
nglecouch.
“
Whatdoy
ouwantt
owat
ch?Amov
ie?
”
“
Any
thi
ngi
sfi
-“
“
Evennews?Fr
ance24?
”
Sheshookherheadchuckl
i
ng.
“
See?Bepr
eci
se.Obat
lamov
ie?
”
“
Eer
ra.
”
“
Ok.Iwi
l
lpl
ayamov
ie.
”
Mot husiplayedamov iet
hent heystart
edwat ching.
Hest oleglancesatherstar
ingatt hedarkbeauty
beforehim wonder i
ngwhyhenev ernoti
cedhert rue
beauty.Itwasi ft
hediamondhadal waysbeent here
andhej ustfail
edtoseeitallalong.Nanaoturned
herheadandcaughthi m st
aringthenquickl
ylooked
awaywat chi
ngTV.
Shesmi l
edslight
lywonderingwhyhewasl ooki
ngat
herli
kethat,
hehadnev erlookedatherl
i
ket hat
,not
everthoughitwasnowcl osetoayearworkingfor
hi
m.Shesi ghed,hiswi
fehadbeensost r
ictshehad
setall
therul
es.Atsomepoi ntshethoughtt
hey
bothagreedashusbandandwi fethatshewoul
dn’t
watchTVoreatint hesi
tt
ingroom andshereal
ly
didn’
thaveaprobl
em withitbutnowshecouldsee
thehusbandwasn’taproblem.Hiswifewas.
Thepeacet hatcamewi thherabsencewas
ref
reshi
ng, shel
ookedathi m ashefocusedont he
TV.Ifsheev erhadamanl ikehi
m shewassur e
goingtotreathi
ml i
keaKi ng.Heneverraisedhis
voi
ceathi sexnomat terwhatshedid,eventhrough
hercheatingshenani
gans, heneverr
aisedhisvoice.
Her emindedherofherfather.
“
Whyar
eyoust
ari
ngatme?
”
Shel
ookedawayembar
rassed.
“
Comeher
e,comeandsi
ther
e.”
Shel
ookedathi
mthengotupandsatbesi
dehi
m.
“
Youcanj
ustr
elax.
”
“
Eer
ra.
”

*
**
Maatl
awalkedinsi
dethehospit
alwhereEsi
was
paci
ngupanddownmumbl ingsomethi
ngonher
own.Shestoppedstar
ingatMaatl
awalki
ngover
.
“
Any
thi
ngf
rom t
hedoct
orsasy
et?
”
Sheshookherhead.“
No,
Not
hing.Iam scar
ed.Iam
soscar
ed.”
“
It
’sgoi
ngt
obeok.
”
Tear
sfi
ll
edEsi’
seyes.“Shewaspregnant
.Shefound
outt
oday.Shewasgoingtotell
himtomorrow.She
wassoexcit
edaboutgraduat
ingandworki
ng.”
Maat
lahuggedher
.“I
t’
sgoi
ngt
obeok.
”
“
Thepol
i
cear
eguar
dingev
ery
wher
e…”
“Ronawil
lgetheragoodlawyer
.Helov
esher
.Idon’
t
beli
evehewascheati
ng.Ithi
nkit
’sa
misunder
standi
ng.
”
“Iam notgoingt
oforgi
vehi
mforthi
s.Notev
er.The
onlymistakeshedi
dwaslovehi
m.”
At
sil
ewal
kedov
er.“
Hey
…what
’sgoi
ngon?
”
Maatl
al etgoofEsi andl
ookedathisyounger
br
other.“Apparent
lyKennyshotKayandpossibl
y
Rona.Idon’tknow.”
“
Why
?”
Esi
wipedawayhert
ear
s.“
Becausehewascheat
ing!
Hewascheat
ingwit
hKay!
”
“
Wedon’
tknowt
hatf
orsur
e.”
“
Ifhewasn’tt
henKennywoul dhavenevershothim.
Weallknowthathisrel
ati
onshi
pwithKaynever
r
eall
yended,j
ustthatshelef
ttofur
therherst
udies.
NowKennygotshott oo.
”
“
Shi
t!
”
At
sil
e’
sphoner
ang.
“Hel
l
o?Iam busy.Iwi
llcal
lyou…Iam busy!
”He
angr
il
yhungupthenlookedathisbr
other.
“
Sowhathast
hedoct
orsai
d?”
Maat
lashookhi
shead.“
Not
hingy
et.
”
Esibrokedowncryi
ng.Maat
lahuggedhi
swi
feagai
n
ki
ssingherfor
ehead.
*
**

I
nRona’
sroom,
hisdoct
orl
ookedathi
m andsi
ghed.
“Youaregoi
ngt
obef
ine.Thekni
fedi
dn’
tgot
hat
deep.
”
“
Ismygi
rl
fr
iendok?Hernamei
sKenel
i
weLaol
ang.
”
“
Idon’
tknow,
Iam notherdoct
or.
”
Ronatri
edt ogetupbutthenursepushedhi
m down.
“Justr
elax,wewill
findoutwhatwecanandcome
backtoy ou.
”
“Pl
easedoitnow…shewasshot.Thel
astt
imeIsaw
hershewasbleedi
ngsomuch.Shewasn’
tbreat
hing.
Therewasbloodal
lover
.”
“
Iwi
l
ltr
yandf
indouthowshei
s.Youcanj
ustr
elax.
”
Thedet
ect
ivewalkedint
henl
ookedathi
m.“
Canwe
tal
ktoy
oumor ena?”
Thedoctorandnur
sewal
kedoutasRonaf
acedt
he
det
ecti
ve.
“Wejustwantt
otakey
ourst
atement
.What
happened?
”
“
Idon’
tremember
.”
“Look,Iknowy ouprobablywanttoprot
ectyour
gir
lf
r i
end,Iunder
standthatbutifshemakesitout
ali
ve,sheisgoingtogot ojai
lforatt
empted
mur der.
”
“
Kayi
snotdead?
”
“Sheisaliveandt hedoctorssayshei sgoi ngtobe
fi
ne.Shei sgoingt otel
lthetruthandeitherway ,all
theev i
dencepoi ntstoyourgirl
fri
endsoj usttellt
he
truthsothatatleastshei schargedwithpassi on
crime.Yout ellt
het r
uthonev eryt
hingthathappened.
Youmi ghtsav ehergoingt ojai
lforalongt ime.”The
detecti
veshr ugged.“Yourchoice.”

*
**

Kenny’
sgrandmot
her’sphonerangasshesatonthe
bedreadi
ngherbi
ble.Shelookedati
tthent
ookit
smili
ng,
mostlyitwasjustKennywhocall
ed.She
bl
inkedacoupleofti
mest ry
ingtor
eadtheunsaved
numberthensheanswer ed.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Dumel
ang,
arewespeaki
ngt
oDor
othLaol
ang?
”
“
Yes,
whoi
sspeaki
ng?
”
“Wearecal
li
ngfr
om Gabor
onePr
ivat
eHospi
tal
,how
doyouKenei
lweLaol
ang?”
Theoldwoman’ shear
tski
pped.“
Kenny?Sheismy
granddaught
er,
isever
ythi
ngok?Issheok?”
“Unfort
unat
elyt
herehasbeenani nci
dentt
hatt
ook
place.Shewasshotearl
ieronaftershooti
nga
womanandhol dingherboyfr
iendhostagewit
ha
gun.”
“
Ij
oweeee!
”
“
Unf
ort
unat
elyshe…”
Kenny
’sgrandmotherdroppedt hephoneputt
ingher
handoverherchestasapainst ruckher
.Hersist
er
i
n-l
awwal kedi
nholdingherpill
st henl
ookedather
asshestruggl
edtobreathe,herhandonherchest.
Shequi
ckl
yputdownever
ythi
nghur
ryi
ngtohersi
de
asshef
ell
tothefl
oorl
osi
ngconsci
ous.
“
Nono….Godno…nott
oday
…nott
oday
..
”
Shegotupandhur r
iedoutcal
l
ingherhusband.Her
husbandrushedbackinthenl
ookedathissi
steron
thefl
oor.
“
Whathappened?
”
“
Hear
tatt
ack,let
’scar
ryher
.Weneedt
otakehert
o
t
hehospi
tal
.”
Thesist
erin-
lawknel
tbeforeheragai
nputt
ingher
fi
ngersonhernecktr
yingtofeelf
orherpul
sewhil
e
herhusbandstar
edather.
“
Shei
sal
i
ver
ight
?”
Sheswal
l
owedt
hennodded.“
Yes,
let
’sgo.
”
Theypi
ckedherupandt
ookhert
othecar
.

*
**
Atthewai
ti
ngarea,
thedoct
orwal
kedov
ert
hent
hey
al
ll
ookedathi
m.
“
Doct
or,
howi
sshe?I
ssheok?
”
Thedoct
orsi
ghedst
ari
ngatt
hem.
“
Unf
ort
unat
elyIhav
ebadnews…”
Esi
swal
l
owedhar
d.“
Whati
sit
?Issheok?
”
Seanwalkedov
erwithhiscol
l
eague,hedr
ew
att
ent
ionashewalked,bot
hhim andhi
sfr
iend.
“
Doct
or,
howi
sshe?
”
Thedoct
orsi
ghednotsur
ewher
etost
art
.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#42

Thedoct
orl
ookedatt
hem.
“Shesufferedseri
ousgunshotwoundsandhas
i
nt er
nalbleedi
ng.Ther
eissli
ghtl
ydamagetoherl
eft
kidney.
”
“
Isshegoi
ngt
obeok?
”
“Sheneedsasurgery,
immediatel
y.Shemightnot
makeitoutali
veorshemight.Atthi
sstageit
’s
goingt
ot akeamiracl
etosav
eher .”
Esiputherhandov
ermout
hshaki
ngherhead
tear
ful
ly.“
OhmyGod…”
“Youneedt
ohav efai
th.Iam adoctorbutIal
so
beli
evei
nprayer
.Keepheriny ourpr
ayersbecause
sheneedsi
t.I
fshemakesi toutofthissur
gery,she
wil
lmakeit
.”
Thenursewhisper
edsomet hi
ngtothedoct
ort
hen
henodded.“
Ok, wejustmanagedtogethol
dofher
mother
.”
Esi
nodded.“
Shest
ayswi
thhergr
andmot
her
.”
“
Ok.
”
“
Whataboutt
hebaby
?”
“I
nthemeanti
me,t
hebabyisfi
nebuti
fKenei
l
we’s
condi
ti
ongetswor
se,
Iam afr
aidt
hebaby’
sli
fewi
ll
beonthel
ine.”
“
CanIseeher
?”
“
Yes,
butoneper
sonatat
ime.
”
“
Iwi
l
lgo.
”
“
Qui
ckl
y,shei
sgoi
ngt
oORi
naf
ewmi
nut
es.
”
“
Ok.
”
Esifol
lowedthenur sethenwalkedinsideKenny ’
s
room.Herhear tsankasshelookedatKenny
connectedtomachi neswhil
etheybeepedst eadi
ly.
Esihel
dKenny ’shandrecall
i
ngoft heirlast
conversat
ion.Shesmi l
edtearf
ull
y.
“Hey…youaregoingtobef i
ne.Iknow.Youar ea
fi
ghter
.It
’snotov
ery et
.Iam sorr
ymyl ove.Lovei
s
notsupposedtohurtli
kethi
s.IwishIcantakethe
pai
nf ory
ou.Youdon’
tdeservethi
s.”Esil
ookedup
astearsrol
l
eddownhercheeks.“IwishIcantalk
andlaughwithy
ou.Godblessedmewi thasister
andIcan’tj
ustl
oseher
.”
Shecov eredherfacecryi
ng.Minutesl
at ert
hedoors
openedt henthenurseswalkedin.Esisteppedback
ast heypushedherout .Seanwal kedi
nt hensighed
staring,himtoocouldn’tbel
iev
ewhatwas
happeni ngwasact uall
yhappened.May beifhe
i
nt ervenedmor esooner…
Esi
cri
edevenlouderkneel
ingonthefl
oor
.Sean
l
ookedathert
henwal kedoverandhel
pedherup.
“Hey…Idon’tknowKennythatmuchbutIam not
sureifwhatsheneedsfrom y
ouisthi
s.Sheneeds
youtostandfir
mf orher
,sheneedsyoutobestrong
forher.
”
“
Iam scar
ed.Iwi
l
ldi
eifshedi
es.
”
Seantil
tedherchinstaringather.“
List
entome.
Nothi
ngi shappeni
ngt oy ou.Ort
oany one.Kenny
wil
lmakei toutal
ive.Shei sgoi
ngtosurvivethi
s.
You’v
egott ohavef ai
th.Hope.Youcan’tcryasif
someonedi
ed.Whatar
eyoucr
yingf
or?
”
Esi
pressedherl
i
pst
oget
hert
ryi
ngt
okeept
hecr
ies
i
n.
“Pi
ckyour
selfup.Kennydoesn’
tneedy
oucr
yingf
or
herl
iket
hisasifsheisdead.
”
Esi noddedwipingawayhert earswiththebackof
herhand.“ Good.Youaregoi ngtostandfirm,be
strongforher.Whenshewal ksoutyouar egoingto
beherst rengt
h,sheisgoi ngtoneedit.Thisisnot
event hehardestpartofitall
.Shesti
llhas
mount ainstocrosssor i
ghtnowi snotthet i
met o
breakdown.Ri ght?
”
“
Yes.
”
Seanl
ookedathert
hensmi
l
ed.“
Great
.”
“
Youar
etheonewhoshother
?”
“
No.Somef
ool
did.
”
Esi
nodded.“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Youar
ewel
come.Youar
egoi
ngt
obef
iner
ight
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Sur
e?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Bye.
”
Hepinchedhercheekthenwalkedout.Esisni
ff
ed
wi
pingherfacewiththehem ofhert
-shir
t.

*
*

Ronalookedathisbr
other
sast
heyt
oldhi
m what
thedoctorhadsai
d.
“Ican’
tbel
iev
ethi
sishappeni
ng.Ij
ustwantt
owake
upf r
om t
hishor
ri
bledr
eam.”
“
Whathappened?
”
“Iwasn’tcheati
ng.Iwouldnevercheat.Kaycame
unexpectedly
,shef oundtheenti
resetupthen
undressed.Shewashopi ngIsleepwithher.Kenny
arr
ivedandIpani ckedbecauseKaywasnaked.
TherewasnowayIwoul dexplai
nwhyKaywas
naked.Ididn’
tevent hi
nkproperl
y,Ij
ustwentwith
hertothebedr
oom.IthoughtIwoul
ddi
str
actKenny
thenKaywouldleav
e…”
Maat
lasighed.“
Ibel
i
evey
ou.Iknowhowmuchy
ou
l
oveKenny.”
Asti
l
eshookhi
shead.“
Iwoul
dhavenevert
hought
Kennywoul
ddothi
s.Wher
edidsheevengett
he
gun?”
“
It
’smi
ne.
”
Maatl
afr
owned.“
Ithoughty
ougotr
idoft
hatl
ong
back.
”
Atsi
l
eshrugged.“
Atleasti
t’
slegal
.Thingsarenot
l
ookinggoodforyouKennyri
ghtnow.Whenshe
l
eavesthi
splacesheisgoi
ngt obefacingser
ious
char
ges.”
“
Ispoket
oal
awy
er.Agoodone.
”
Maatl
anodded.“
That
’sagoodmov
e,heorshe
bet
terber
eall
ygood.
”
Esiopenedthedoorthenwalkedi
n.Shelookedat
Ronasilent
lyt
hentur
nedt oMaatl
a.“ShewenttoOR.
Iam goingtowai
tforher.Youneedtogohome.The
ki
dsneedatl
eastoneofust
her
e.”
“
Icanst
ay.
.”
“NoMaatl
a,pleasegohomet ot
hekids.Iam not
l
eavi
ngKennyal lal
one.Shehasnoone, theperson
shet
houghtlovedherclearl
ywasly
ingsoshehas
noone!Iwi
llstaywithher.
”
Shewal
kedoutbangi
ngt
hedoor
.Ronasi
ghed.
“
Shehat
esme.
”
“
Shei
sjustangr
y.Esi
woul
dnev
erhat
eany
one.
”

*
**

Candyreadthestoryci
rcul
ati
ngonsoci almedia
whil
elyingonherbed.Shesighedstari
ngatt he
pi
cturesofthescenewonderinghowt hemedi a
al
readygotholdofthose.Thebloodont hef
loors
wassomuchshekeptwonder i
ngifanyonemadei t
ourali
ve.Shescrol
leddowntot hecomment s.
Comment
:Heel
ang,
kegi
rly
aRubi
con!
Comment:Soinst
eadofwalki
ngawayshechoseto
shoott
hesidechi
ck?Iwil
lnev
erf
indmysel
ffi
ghti
ng
awomanforaman, never
!
Comment
:Whatawow!
Comment
:Sheshoul
dhaveatt
ackedherboy
fri
end
nott
heot
herwoman,what
’swrongwit
huswomen?
Comment
:It
’st
hatcoupl
eyaRubi
con.I
jo!
Comment
:Kgangkey
eyapi
tagany
abat
hong.
Comment:Feel
sosadf orthatyoungl ady
,
someti
meswel etouremotionscontrolusandwhen
your
eali
zewhaty ouhavedonei twouldbetool
ate.
Real
l
yhopeshewal ksoutofthis.
Comment
:Nocomment
!
Comment:Sohecanst
il
lbuyy
ouacarwor
thal
ot
andst
il
lcheat
?
Candyscroll
edthroughacoupl emor ecomment s
thencall
edRonabuthi sphoner angunanswered.
Shesighedworri
edlythinkingofwhatcouldbe
possibl
yhappening.Shef oundhersel
ffeel
ingsor
ry
forKenny,t
hewhol esit
uat i
ondidn’
tfavorher,
she
coul
dbepossi
blygotojail
.Candysighedt
henher
phonest
art
edri
nging.Shesmiled.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Heybabe,
soIwi
l
lbef
lyi
ngi
ntomor
row.
”
“
Yey
!Aboutt
ime.
”
“
Yeah,
Imi
ssy
ou.
”
“
Imi
ssy
out
oo.
”
Herv
ibr
atedi
ndi
cat
ingani
ncomi
ngcal
l
,.
“
Babe,
cal
lmebackaf
teraf
ewmi
nut
es,
Ihav
ean
i
ncomi
ngcal
l
.”
“
Ok.
”
Candyhungupandanswer
edherf
ri
end’
scal
l
.
“
Tsal
adi
dyousee?Yourguy
…”
“
Yahneh.
.”
“
Youdodgedt
hebul
l
et.
”
“Eish…Ifeel
sorryf
orhi
sgi
rl
fr
iend.Iam sur
eshe
didn’tmeanto.
”
“
Iknow,
ifi
twer
emeIwoul
dhav
edonet
hesame.
”
“
Nowshei
sgoi
ngt
ofacej
ail
time.I
t’
ssad.
”
“Li
fefri
end.Life!That’
swhyIhat emenwhost il
l
haveunfinishedbusinesswithexes.Theyannoyme
becausey oucannev erstar
tanythi
ngwi t
hhim.His
heartwil
lforeverbesomewher eelse.”
“Tel
lmeabouti
tbutIr
eal
l
ythoughtRonal
ovedt
his
gir
l.
”
“Thi
sgenderthatbet
rayedJesusi
str
icky
.Theywi
l
l
humbleyou.Anywho,letmegoandseebae.
”
“
Okl
ove,
bet
ternotcat
chhi
m anex.
”
“Iwi
llki
ll
them bothandmakesuretheyhav
edied.I
am notgoingt
ogot ojai
lforat
temptedmurder
,Iwi
l
l
goforthereal
thing.
”
Candylaughedhangi
ngupt
hencal
l
edherf
iancé
back.

*
**

I
nshakaweatt
hehospi
tal
,thenur
sel
ookedat
Kenny
’sgr
andmot
hert
henatherbr
other
.
“Herbloodpressur
etr
igger
editbutsheisgoi
ngt o
befine.Wearegoingtokeepherhereforawhil
eso
toobserveher.Somet
hinghappenedthatt
ri
ggered
thi
s.”
“
Yes.Somet
hinghappened.
”
“
Wewi l
lkeepherher
emoni
tor
ingherbutshei
s
f
ine.
”
“
Thanky
ousomuch.
”
Thenur
sewal
kedout
.
“
Whatdi
dyousayhappened.
”
MmagweTumosi ghedstar
ingatherhusband.
“KennyshotawomankoGabor one,apparent
lyshe
caughttheboyf
ri
endwithherthenshott heother
womanandst abbedtheboyfr
iend.”
“Ican’
tbel
i
ev ethi
s.Thi
siswhatIal
way
ssay
,that
placei
spoisonous.”
“Weneedtogot here.Thatchi
l
dneedsus.Iam sur e
yourni
eceisunbotheredbyallofit
,pr
obablywishi
ng
herdaught
ercandiesoshecant akehert
hings.I
can’
tGodblessedthatvi
l
ewomanwi thsucha
beaut
if
ulchi
ld.Shedoesn’
tdeser
veher.
”
“Kef
iwantedt ogivethatchil
dupforadopt
ionbut
hermotherrefused.Shenev erwant
edKeneil
wesoI
am notsurpr
isedthattil
ltodayshedoesn’
twant
Kenei
lwe.”

*
**

Thefol
lowi
ngmorni
ngTshenolol
ookedatthe
pi
ctur
essadlyt
hensi
ghedtr
yingKenny
’snumber
agai
n.
“
Hel
l
o?”
Shequickl
ystoodupi
nherGer
manpr
intdr
essas
thephonegotanswer
ed.
“
Hi…i
t’
sTshenol
o..
”
“
Ohhi
Tshenol
o,y
ouar
espeaki
ngt
oMoesi
.”
“
Howi
sKenny
?”
“
Shei
sst
il
lunconsci
ousbutshemadei
toutof
sur
ger
yal
i
ve.
”
“
Ist
hesi
tat
uonbad?
”
“
Notnow.Shei
sgoi
ngt
obef
ine.
”
“
Thebaby
?”
“
Thebabyi
sfi
ne.Godwor
ksi
nmy
ster
iousway
s.”
“
Peopl
ear
esay
ingshei
sgoi
ngt
ogot
ojai
l
.”
“
Peoplearepeople,noonereal
l
yknows.Shewill
be
f
ine.
”Esit
ookadeepbr eat
hashervoi
cefaded.“
She
i
sgoingtobefine.”
“Iam scared.Todaywassupposedtobeahappy
dayformebutIam sad.Idon’tthi
nkIam goi
ngt
o
enjoyit
.”
“Shei
sgoi
ngtobefi
ne.Don’
tstr
esst
oomuch.I
t’
s
Kenny
.Kennyal
way
smakesi t
.”
Tshenol
onoddedbl
i
nki
ngawayhert
ear
snott
orui
n
hermake-up.
“
Yah.
.”
“Ok,Ihavet
ogo.Iwi
l
lcal
lyoui
ncaseofany
change.”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Shehungupandputherphonedownt
aki
ngadeep
breat
h.

*
**

Atthehospi t
al,Kefil
wewalkedoverandspoketothe
recept
ionistwhodi rect
edhertothedoct
or’
soffi
ce.
Shewal kedov erthenknockedbefor
ewalki
ngin.
“
Goodmor
ningdoct
or…Iam Kenei
l
we’
smot
her
.”
“
Oh,
hel
l
o…y
oucansi
t.
”
Shesatdown.
“Keneil
wesufferedint
ernalbl
eedi
ngduetothe
gunshotwoundbutwemanagedt ost
opthatand
alsorepai
rherleftki
dney.Sheisst
abl
eatthe
moment .”
“Ehe…Iunder
stand,butIam notgoi
ngtoletmy
daughterl
i
veinpain.I
fneeded,Iam wi
ll
i
ngt oswi
tch
offthemachi
nes.Iwouldneverputhert
houghso
muchpainofbeingconnect
edt
omachi
nes.Ial
so
needhert
hings,
hercar.
”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#43

Thedoct
orl
ookedatKef
il
wewi
thaf
rown.
“
What
?”
“Iam notgoi
ngt
oputmydaughtert
hroughsomuch
painwhenshecanj
ustbef
ree.
”
“
Sheisnotdyi
ng.Sheisst
able.Shei
sgoingt
obe
f
ine.Wearewait
ingf
orhertowakeup.”
“
Ok, wher
ear
eherbel
ongi
ngs?Icamet
ocol
l
ecther
t
hings.
”
“Wedon’ thav ehert
hingsher
e.Shewasbr oughti
n
byt heambul anceandweonlyrecei
vedher,nothi
ng
else.Youmi ghtwanttotalkt
oherboyfr
iendabout
those.”
Kef
il
west
oodup.“
Wher
eisherboy
fri
end?
”
Thedoctorshookhi
sheadstar
ingatheri
ncomplet
e
shock.Hehadcameacrossdif
fer
entpeopl
einal
l
hi
slif
ebutthiswomantookthetr
ophy.
*
**

Ronaf
ini
sheddressi
ngthenwal
kedoutoft
heroom
att
hehospi
tal
,hefrownedst
ari
ngatKenny
’smother
whowasstari
ngathim.
“
Dumel
ang…”
“
Iam her
etocol
l
ectKenny
’st
hings.
”
“
Whatt
hings?
”
“
Hercar
.Iam goi
ngt
okeept
hem saf
easher
mot
her.
”
“
Hercar
?”
“Yes.Hercar
.Andherwal
l
etsandev
ery
thi
ngof
hers.
”
Ronashookhi
sheadwi
thachuckl
est
ari
ngather
.
“
Ist
hatallyoucar
eabout
?Kennyi
sfight
ingf
orher
l
i
fe,
theleastyoucandoi
spret
endtocareabi
t.
”
“
Icar
eaboutmydaught
er,
Iam nott
her
easonshei
s
her.Youarethereasonshei shere.Givememy
daughter’
sthi
ngs.Iwantev ery
thi
ngt hatbel
ongst
o
her.Iam hermother,Iam herrel
ati
veandIam
getti
ngthem.”
Ronalookedatherangri
l
y.“
Youar
enotget
ti
ng
anyt
hing.Nxl
a,watlwael
amosadi
kewena.
”
Ronawal
kedpastherpi
cki
ngLebi
tso’
scal
l
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Whatam Ihear
ing?
”
“
It
’sal
ongst
ory
.”
“WhatwasKaydoi
ngt
her
e?It
houghtwewer
elong
pastt
hatgi
rl
.”
“
Wear
e,t
hingsj
ustspi
ral
edoutofcont
rol
sof
ast
.”
“
Kennymi
ghtgot
ojai
l
.”
“
Igotheral
awy
er.
”
“Ican’
tbeli
evethi
s.Ican’
tbel
iev
eIam waki
ngupt
o
thi
s.IthoughtIwasgoingtowakeupt
ogoodnews
but…”
“
Look,
let
’st
alkl
ater
.”Hehungup.
RonaapproachedKenny’
sdoorandlookedatthe
pol
iceoff
icer
sguardi
ngherdoor.I
twasasi fshe
wasabigcr i
minal
thatneededt
obeguar dedorshe
wasgoingtoescape.
Hewalkedinafterabi
tofexplai
ningatthedoorthen
si
ghedsadlystari
ngatherconnectedtomachines.
Helookedatherasshebreathedthroughtheoxygen
mask.Tear
sf i
l
ledhereyes.
“Iam sorrybabe…Iam sosor r
y.Thisfeel
slikea
dream andal lIwanttodoiswakeup. ”Het ookher
handi nt
ohist henkissedi
t.Themachi nescont i
nued
tobeepst eadilyasshelaythereunconsci
ous.He
smiledstari
ngather ,shesti
lll
ookedbeautifuleven
ont hehospitalbed.Helookedatherhandnot i
cing
theengagementr i
ng.
Thedooropenedt henEsiwalkedinhol
dingacoupl
e
ofthi
ngs.Shesil
entlyputev
erythi
ngdownplaci
ng
fr
eshflowersonthesideofherbed.
“
Youcoul
dhav
edumpedher
.”
Helookedather
.“Iwoul
dnev
ercheatonher
.Il
ove
her
.”
“Ifyoudi dn’tcheatthenwhyi ssheher e?It’
sfunny
hownot hingisgoi ngtohappent oy oubutforher…”
Esi l
ookedathi m speakingcal mly .“
Herli
feismost
l
ikelyruined.Jai l
timewhi l
epr egnant.Cri
minal
record.Youknowhowl ongshehasbeenpl anning
hergr aduat i
on…shei sgoi ngt omi ssthat
.You
enjoyedy ourgraduati
onday .Nev erspentadayi n
j
ai l
.Buther eshei s,fi
ghtingf orherlif
etoonlygot o
j
ai l
.Ihopei twaswor thit
.Ir eall
yhopei twas.”
Ronaturnedbackt
oKennyt
henki
ssedherf
orehead.
“Il
oveyou…”
Esiwait
edti
llhef
inal
l
ywal
kedoutt
henst
art
ed
cl
eaningKennyup.

*
**

Latert
hatdayTshenol
osatinKgosi
’
scarst
il
l
rocki
ngherGermanpri
ntdress.
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Thanky
ou.
”
Heleanedov erandkissedhersqueezingherthigh.
Hishandwenti nsi
deherdresst henhetouchedher
pant
iespull
ingthem totheside.Tshenolomov ed
backslappi
nghi shand.
“
Behav
e!”
Hesmil
edleani
ngback.“
Whenar
eyoucomingback?
Iwast
hinki
ngwegot oNami
biat
ocel
ebrat
e.”
“
Kennyi
sinhospi
tal
.Mybestf
ri
end.
”
“
Why
?Whathappenedt
oher
?”
“Appar
ent
lyshecaughtherboy
fri
endcheat
ingt
hen
shothi
ssi
dechickandstabbedhim.
”
“
Damn!
”
“
Shewasshotdown.
”
“
Ofcause.
”
“Ican’tgot
oNamibiawhi l
eshei
sly
ingonahospi
tal
bed.Sheneedsme.Ifitweremeinhershoes,
I
knowshewoul dbethere.Shewast
herewhenIwas
sick,shewoul
dli
stentomecr yi
npain.
”
“
Ok…wecangowhenshewakesup,
didt
hesi
de
chi
ckdi
e?”
“
No.
.Idon’
tthi
nkso.
”
“Yeahbutsheisgoi
ngt
ojai
li
fshedoesn’
tgeta
goodlawyer.
”
“Ther
rawenadon’ttal
kli
kethat
.Shecan’tgot
ojai
l
.
Shehastograduateandsheispregnant
.”
“Wel
lli
fehashappened.Iam sor
rybutsheshoul
d
getagetgoodlawyertoescapethi
sone.”
“
Ihopeso.
”
“
Iwi
l
lbooki
ntoal
odget
henpi
cky
ouupl
ater
.”
Tshenol
olookedathi
m,henev
eraskedbutr
ather
al
way st
hrewcommands.Shesighedt
henki
ssed
hi
m.
“
Ok.Ihav
etogo.
”
“
Staybeaut
if
ul.
”
Shebl
ushedthenst
eppedoutoft
hecarandwal
ked
backi
ntheyard.
*
**

Nanaof i
nishedcleaningthehouset henwenttothe
ki
tchenwher eshest art
edcookingbr eakf
astwit
h
herearphonespluggedi nhereyes.Shemov edher
waistl
isteni
ngtoaNi geri
anhitsong.Shemov ed
awayfrom thepot sast hesonggott othehookand
sangalongdancing.

Mot husiwalkedfrom t
hebedr oom thenpaused
stari
ngatNanaodanci ngmov i
ngherwai stwhining.
Het ookouthi sphonet aki
ngav i
deoasshe
continueddancingsinging.Sheturnedtohim and
quicklytookoffherphonesashest oppedthevideo
andsl i
dt hephoneinhispocket.
“
Goodmor
ning.
”
“
Hey
…”
“
Yourbr
eakf
asti
sready
.”
“
Thanks.Hei
sst
il
lsl
eepi
ng.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hesatont heki
tchenstoolt
henshegav ehi
m hi
s
f
oodst ar
ingathismismatchingj
acket
.Shewalked
t
ot hebedroom whereshechoseanothert
hen
i
roneditandwalkedbackwi t
hit.
“
Yourj
acketi
sabi
tdi
rt
y,y
oucanweart
hisone.
”
Mothusi
pausedt
hentookof
ftheonehewas
weari
ngandputt
heoneshehadtakenout
.
“
Thanks.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
Helookedatherf
oramomentt
hensmi
l
ed.“
Isi
t
di
rt
yorjustwasn’
tmat
chi
ng.
”
Nanaoshy l
ysmi ledandwalkedoutofthekitchen
l
eavinghim eat
ing.ShelookedatLefasleepi
ng
fi
guri
ngshewoul dhaveti
met oqui
cklywashhi s
cl
othesbeforehewokeup.Shecol lect
edal l
her
cl
othesthenwal kedtothebathr
oom withthem.
*

Mothusifi
nishedeat
ingt
hengotupandwal kedto
thebat
hroom wherehecouldhearherwashing.He
openedthedoorandsmiled.
“
Hey
,Iam goi
ngt
owor
k.”
“
Ok.
”
“
Ify
ouneedany
thi
ngj
ustsendamessage.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hel
ookedatherf
orawhilet
henwalkedout
.Nanao
smi
l
edaloneandcont
inuedwashi
ngashedroveout
.

*
**

Latert
hatmorni
ng,Kef
il
wefol
dedherar
msas
Aronawalkedi
nsi
dethepol
i
cestat
ion.
“
Mor
ena…”
Ar
onal
ookedather
.“Ar
eyouser
iousr
ightnow?
”
“Iwantmydaughter
’sthi
ngs.Iam hermot
her,you
arenoonetoher.Iwantevery
thi
ngofhersthat
belongst
oher.
”
“
Ihavecall
edhergrandmotherandt
heyar
eont
hei
r
way.Theywil
ltaket
hem f
rom me.”
Kef
ilookedatt hepoli
ceofficer.“
Iam Keneil
we’s
mother,hei snoone.Mymot herwil
ltaket
hem from
mebutint hemeant i
me, Iwantmydaught er’
sthings.
Youaret her easonwhyshei sinhospit
ali
nthefirst
pl
ace.Giv emehert hings.”
Thepol
i
ceof
fi
cerl
ookedatRona.
“Inthemeanti
meshei
st hecl
osefamilymember
her eandshehast
her
ighttogetherdaught
er’
s
things.
”
Aronashookhisheadchuckl
i
ngunabl
etobel
i
evei
t
thenhesighed.
“
Ok.I
t’
sonl
yhercarandcl
othes.
”
“
Herbankcar
dst
oo.Ev
ery
thi
ngt
hatbel
ongst
oherI
wanti
t.
”
“
Ok.
”
Ronawal
kedoutasshef
oll
owedaf
terhi
m.
“
Fol
l
owme.
”
Shewal
kedr
oundhi
scart
ogeti
n.
“
Noti
nmycar
.Fi
ndy
ourownt
ranspor
t.
”
Hegoti nhiscart henstartedt heengi ne.Kef i
stoppedat axithengoti nandf oll
owedRona’ scar .
Ronapar kedhisbesi desthewhi teRubi conand
sighedst eppingout ,Heswal lowedwal kinginsi de
thehouse.Ev eryt
hingwasj ustasi twas.Lastni ght
’s
event splayedinhi sheadl i
keamov ie.Hef ound
himsel fwonder i
ngwhyhehadn’ thandledt he
situati
onmuchbet ter
.Herbagswer est il
lwher eshe
putt hem.Herhandbagwasont hecouch.Hepi cked
i
tupandl ookedinsidethencameoutwi t
ht he
pregnancyst i
ck.Hesear chedi tandt ookouther
bankcar dandt heonehehadgi ventoher .Heput
them inhi spocketanddr aggedherbagsout side.
Kef iwalkedov erandt ookt hem t ogetherwi t
ht hecar
key s.SheopenedKenny ’
sbagandsear chedi tthen
tookoutherschool bankcar dandsomemoney .
“
Wher
ear
eherot
herbankcar
ds?
”
“
Idon’
tknow.
”
“
Andherphone?
”
“
Idon’
tknow,
may
bei
t’
swi
tht
hepol
i
ce.
”
Sheunlockedthecarthenputt
hebagsinsi
debef
ore
gett
inginthecar
.Shest ar
tedt
heengi
neanddrove
outrol
li
ngdownt hewindow.Ronasi
ghedasshe
droveawayinKenny’scar.

*
**

Kefi
lwesmil
eddriv
ing,
shehadnev erdr
ivensucha
bi
gcaranditfel
tgood.Shetookoutherringi
ng
phonethenansweredwhil
edri
vi
ng.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Weareonourwayt her
e,wehear
dyouar
efi
ght
ing
f
orKenny
’st
hings.
”
“MmagweTumo, l
eavemeal
one.Theyar
emy
daught
er’
sthi
ngsandIwi
l
lgett
hem.”
“
Youar
eawi
tch.
”
“
Iam get
ti
ngti
redofbei
ngcal
l
edt
hatname.Don’
t
y
ougetti
red?
”
“
WhenKennywakesup-
“
“I
fshewakesup.Shewil
lprobabl
ydi
eandIam
goingt
otakeever
ythi
ngthati
s-“
Acarhoot erst
art
ledher,sherai
sedherey es
real
izi
ngshewasdr i
vi
ngintothewronglanethen
shesway edthecarbackintoherli
nehit
tingatruck
besideher.Shescreamedpanicki
ng,herfoot
steppingonsomet hi
ng.Thecarsurgedforwad
headingri
ghtint
ot he4x4infr
ontofher.

*
**

Atthehospit
al,
Esil
i
stenedt
osomegospelsongs
si
tt
ingbesideKenny
.Thedooropenedt
henPeo
walkedi
n.
“
Ohmy
…”
“
Hi.
.”
“
Idi
dn’
tknowi
twast
hisser
ious.Ican’
tbel
i
evet
his.
”
“
Iwi
shi
twasadr
eam.
”
“Ican’
tKennyalmostkil
l
edsomeone.Ronadat
ed
someonet ooyoungforhim and-
“
“Ngng, ngng,don’tyoudare!Don’
ty oudare!Turn
aroundandwal koutifyouhav enothingposit
ivet
o
say.Youcomeher ewithyournegativeenergy
,what
doy outhi
nkIam?Yout hinkIam justgoingtolet
yout al
khowevery ouwantaboutKenny ?Ketl
ago
clapa,wantena,getout!”
“
Esi
Iwasj
ust
_”
Esilookedatherangr i
ly.“Getout!What’
syour
problem?Can’tyouseewear ethemiddleofa
sit
uation?Youwantt opi ssmeof fandIwillpunch
youruglyface,t
akey ourf l
atassandgetout !Le
tl
etsemasepa.Si es!Shameony ou!IfLebi
tsocan
tol
erateit,
Iwon’t
.Ket lagoshi megamony ana.Out!!
”
Peoquickl
ytur
nedandwalkedout.Esit
urnedback
toKennywhowasslight
lymovi
ngt henshehurr
ied
overasheroxy
genmaskgotmi st
.
“
Kenny…Kenny
…”Esi
pressedt
heemer
gencybut
ton
mul
ti
plet
imes.
“
Kenny
…”
Kennymov
edherheadmaki
ngsl
i
ghtsounds.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#44

Esistoodout si
det heroom ast
hedoctor
sattended
toKenny .Therewasj ustsomet
hingabouthi
mt hat
madeherpayat tenti
ont ohowshewas.Hesmi l
ed
standinginfrontofher.
“
Hi,
Iam l
ooki
ngf
orKenny
.”
Esiswall
owedstar
ingathi
m.“Shei
sinsi
de.The
doctor
sareatt
endi
ngtoher.”
“Iam Nat
e,shewasdoi
ngheri
nter
nshi
patmy
company.”
Esicl
ear
edherthr
oatnodding,
def
ini
tel
yKenny
wasn’
tly
ing.“
UhMr .Bat
sil
e?”
Natesmil
ed.“
Yeah,
issheok?Ikeephear
ing
di
ff
erentst
ori
es.
”
“
Shei
sgoi
ngt
obef
ine,
Ithi
nkshei
sawake.
”
“
Whathappened?
”
“
Idon’
treal
l
yknow,
Iam wai
ti
ngt
ohearf
rom her
.”
Thedoctorwal
kedoutthenEsil
ookedathi
m
hopef
ull
y.“Howisshe?Issheawake?
”
“
Yes,
butsheneedst
otakei
teasy
.”
“
CanIseeher
?”
“
Yeah.
.”
Esiwalkedi
nthenlookedatKennywhoturnedt
oher
bl
inki
ngslowlyastear
sfil
l
edhereyes.Esi
stoodby
hersi
deshakingherheadtear
ful
ly.
“
Don’
tcr
y…y
ouar
egoi
ngt
obef
ine.
”
Kenny
’stearsdr
oppedtothepil
l
owt hensheputher
handoverhermouthndstar
tedcry
ing.Esi
’sl
ips
tr
embledasherowntearsfi
ll
edhereyes.
“
Kenny
….I
t’
sgoi
ngt
obeal
ri
ght
.Don’
tcr
y.”
“
Iam goi
ngt
ojai
l
…”
“
Noonei
sgoi
ngt
ojail
.Noonei
sgoi
ngtoj
ail
ok?
Wear
egoi
ngt
ogetyouagoodl
awyer
.”
“
I…”
“
Shhhy
ouar
egoi
ngt
obef
ine.
.”
“
My…”
“
Thebabyi
sfi
ne.
”
Esi
huggedher
.“Ev
ery
thi
ngi
sgoi
ngt
obef
ine.
”
Kennygaspedcr
ying.“
Iam goi
ngt
ojai
l
…”
“
Noonei
sgoi
ngt
ojai
l
.”
ThedooropenedthenNatewalkedi
n.Esil
ookedat
hi
mt henwipedawayKenny’
stearsandqui
cklyf
ixed
herhai
r.
“
Hesay
shewasy
ourboss.Hecamet
oseey
ou.
”
Esi
’sphonerangfr
om herj
eanpocket
,shetooki
t
outandwalkedoutpi
cki
ngherhusband’
scall
.
“
Babe,
arey
oual
readyatt
hehospi
tal
?”
“
Yes.Kennyi
sawake.
”
“Fuck!Aboutti
me.
.Ronai
sonhi
swayt
her
eorhe
hasar r
ived.
”
Esi
sighed.“
Whatdi
dyouwant
?”
“
Iwant
edt
oseei
fyouwant
edl
unch.
”
“
Yes,
alsof
orKenny
.Letmegi
vey
oual
i
st.
”
“
Can’
tyoutel
lRonat
ogetKenny
’sf
ood,
Imean,
he
i
sal
readyt
here.
”
“AkereIam t
ell
i
ngy
ou.I
fyoudon’
twantt
odoi
t,say
so.”
“
Iwasj
ustsay
ing.
”
“
LennaIam j
ustsay
ing.
”
“Youareangry,
Igetthatbutit’
sr eal
lynotyourplace
tobeangry.Youaredisappointed,youhav eever
y
ri
ghttobe,sad?Yes,butangr y
?Comeon…Rona
didn’
tcheat
,Kennyjustjumpedi ntoconclusi
ons
withoutwai
ti
ngforanexpl anati
on.”
“
Whowoul
dn’
t?Who-
“
“Idon’
tthi
nkweshoul
dbeargui
ngabout
.What
shouldIgetf
ory
ouandKenny?”

*
**

Insi
detheroom,Natesmi
ledstar
ingatKenny
,she
stil
ll
ookedpret
tyhewoul
dn’tt
akethatawayfr
om
her
.
“
Hey
…”
Shel
ookeddownwi
pingaway
war
dtear
.
“Iam sorry
.Iknowhowmuchy oupr obablyl
oved
him,youalway shadtoment ionhim every
timewe
werealonet oget
her.Idi
sli
kedhim becausey oujust
wouldn’tstopbutnowIthinkIhatehi m.Hehadan
enti
rediamondi nthepalm ofhishands,allhehadto
dowascher i
shit
.Howar ey oufeel
ing?”
Sheshr
ugged.“
Scar
ed.
”
Nat
eheldherhand.“
Gett
ingyouagoodlawy
eristhe
f
ir
stst
ep.Icandothatf
oryou.Imeanasafri
end.
”
Sheshookherhead.“
Youdon’
thav
eto.Iwi
l
lmakea
pl
an.
”
“Aft
eral
lthisyoushouldmov
etoMaun.Yourj
obwi
l
l
sti
l
lbewai t
ingforyou.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Mjol
oisascam, evenwheny
ouar
epr
ett
yli
ket
his
t
heywil
lst
il
ldr
ibbleyou.
”
Kennychuckl
edt
ear
ful
l
y.
“Hei
sstupi
d.”Nat
enoti
cedt
her
ing.“
Whatt
imedi
d
hepr
opose?Befor
e?”
Kennynoddedtr
y i
ngnottocry.Nateshookhi
shead.
“Iam r
eal
lysor
ry.Youdon’tdeser
vethis,
notaf
ter
howloyalyouweretohi
m. ”
ThedooropenedthenRonawalkedin.Hef r
owned
atNatehol
dingKenny’
shand.Natelookedathim
knowingwhohewasi mmediat
ely.Kennyletgoof
Nate’
shand.
“
Whoar
eyou?
”
“
Nat
e…herf
ri
end.
”
“
Whatf
ri
end?
”
“
Oneobv
iousl
yyoudon’
tknow.
”
Ronaputwhathewasholdi
ngdownstaringathi
m,
Kennyl
ookedatbot
hofthem,nonbackingdown
andknowi
ngRonashewasmostcer t
ainitwould
endinafi
ght
.
“Awww..
”Sheputherhandov
erherst
omach.Rona
qui
ckl
ycametoherside.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
“
Iam f
ine.
”
“
Iwil
lcomebackl
aterKenny
,letmegoandgety
ou
agoodlawy
er.
”
HewalkedoutasRonaglar
edathim.Het
urnedt
o
Kennyandl
ookedathersoft
ly.“
Howarey
ou
feel
i
ng?”
Tearsf il
l
edherey
esasshel ookedathim.Thepain
comi ngbacksofresh.Shepr essedherl
ipst
ogether
recal
lingKay’
snakedbody ,howhehadwant edher
toleav e,t
hewhol
eset upandt heli
es.
..
“
Iam sor
rybabe…Iam sosor
ry.
”
Kennyshookherhead.“
Pleasel
eav
e.”
“
Iam goi
ngt
omakei
tal
ri
ght
.”
Shel
ookedi
nhi
sey
es.“
Why
?”
“
Babe…”
“
Why
?Cany
out
ell
me?
”
“
Ilov
eyou.Imessedup,
Ipani
ckedbutIswear
…I
wasnotcheat
ing.
”
Thedooropenedagai
nt henthepol
i
cewal
kedi
n.
Ronawipedawayhertears.
“Don’
tsayanyt
hingt
il
lyourl
awyerar
ri
ves.Ispoket
o
herandsheisonherwayhere.
”
“
Dumel
ang,
wewoul
dli
ket
otal
ktoy
ou…al
one.
”
Ronakissedher.“
Don’tsayany
thi
ng.Iam goi
ngt
o
getyourlawy
er.Iam sureshei
salmosthere.
”
Hewal
kedouttaki
ngouthi
sphonet
hendi
aledt
he
l
awyer
’snumber.
“
Hi,
Iam wal
ki
ngi
nsi
det
hehospi
tal
.”
“Ok,Iam comi
ngt
ocol
l
ecty
ou.Thepol
i
cei
sal
ready
here.
”
“Pr
obabl
yt r
yingt
otakeherst
atement
.Sheshoul
dn’
t
sayanyt
hingasyet,
Iwantustogothr
oughwhat
shewil
lsay.”
Ronarushedtothewai
ti
ngar
eawher
eshewas.He
smil
edwalkingover
.
“
Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ng.
”
Li
nasmi
l
ed.“
It
’sok.Youar
epay
ingaf
teral
l
.Wher
e
i
sshe?
”
“
Comet
hisway
.”
HetookhertoKenny ’
sroom thenshewalkedinas
thepoli
ceoff
icerspoke.Thedetect
ivesi
ghed
star
ingather
.Ifther
ewasanyl awyerhehated,i
t
hadtobeher.
“
Lina…”
“
Mar
ibe.CanIt
alkt
omycl
i
ent
.”
“
Wear
ejustt
aki
ngherst
atement
.”
Linasmi l
ed.“AndIjustwantt otal
ktoher
.Let ’
snot
steponeachot her’
stoes.Gapehowar eyoutaking
herstatementwhenshej ustwokeup?Didt he
doctorgivey ouagoahead?Shei spr
obablysti
ll
confused, y
ouwantt otakedownwhatshesai d
confusedandr unwithi
t?Isthatit
?Whatdot hey
teachaty ourli
ttl
eschool?”
“
Iam j
ustdoi
ngmyj
ob.
”
“
Soam I
,comebackl
ater
.Iam t
alki
ngt
omycl
i
ent
.”
Thedet
ect
ivesi
ghedandwalkedout.Li
nalookedat
Kennyt
henfi
xedherbl
azerputt
ingherbagdown.
“HiKenny .Mynamei sLina,Iam goi
ngtobey our
l
awy er.Iwantyoutotellmeev ery
thi
ngthat
happened, t
akemet hroughwhathappened,
everyt
hing.Iam goi
ngt otryandseeifIcanhelpyou
getawaywi thi
torgetawaywi thminimum
sentence.Workwithmeok? ”
Kennynodded.“
Good.Ar
onagi
veussomespace.
”
HenoddedandwalkedoutthenLinasatdownas
Kennyt
oldherev
erythi
ngthathappened.
“
Ok.I
sthatal
l
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Ok…sot
heguni
sRona’
s?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Howf
arar
eyou?Thepr
egnancy
?”
“
Thedoct
orsai
d6mont
hs.
”
“
6?Wow…y
oudon’
tlookpr
egnant
.”
Kennysmiled.“
Ng…Ial
socan’
tbel
ieveit
.IthoughtI
wasjustgaini
ngandmybell
yisabitswoll
en.But
ther
eismov ement.
”
“
Ok,
wecanuset
hatt
oouradv
ant
age.
”
“
Doy
out
hinkt
her
eisachanceofmegoi
ngt
ojai
l
?”
Linanodded.“ Yes.Youdi dshootsomeone.Youkept
Ronahost age…y outol
dthepol i
cet ostepbackor
elsey ouwi l
lshoot.Chancesarethat ,Iam givingit
toy oust raight,y
oumaygot ojailforattempt ed
mur derandwhatIcandoi str
yget ti
ngy oual ess
har shsent encebecausey ouremot i
onswer e
i
nf luencedbyy ourhormonesandei therway ,the
situationitself
.Passioncrime.Ort hejudgei sgoi ng
tobedi ff
icultandfindyouguilt
ythengi vesyoua
har shsent ence,butthati
swhatIam her efor, t
o
prev entthatf r
om happening.Rightnowt heyar e
goi ngt ol
ocky ouup,wewi l
lbailyououtt heny ou
wai tfortrialathome.”
“
Mygr
aduat
ion….
”
“Hopeful
lyyourbail
heari
ngcomessoonersoyou
canattendyourgraduat
ion.Ineedy
out
otrustmeto
hel
py ou.”
“
Ok.
”
“
Good.
”
*
**

Kefi
lwest
aredattheotherwomanwhowasbur
ning
wit
hanger,herheadonherfor
ehead.
“Shej
ustranint
omycarfrom behi
ndthat
’swhyI
bumpedintothi
stax
idr
iver.“
Shepoint
edatthetaxi
dri
ver
.“Idon’
tknowhowshei sdri
vi
ngwhil
etalki
ng
toonthephone?”
Thepoliceoff
icerlookedatKef
il
we.“Youdrovei
nto
thewronglane,camebacki nt
oy ourl
ane,
hitatr
uck
thendroveint
ot hecarinfr
ontofyou.
”
“
Shehastopayfort
hedamage.Iam st
il
lpay
ingt
he
l
oanf
orthi
scar.
”
“
Mydaught
erwi
l
lpayf
oral
lthedamages.
”
Thetaxi
dri
verlookedather
.“Al
sof ormytaxit
oo
ri
ght
?Kanay aanongwithmytaxidamaged,Ican’
t
makemoneyandIhav ekidstosupport.
”
Kef
il
wenodded.“
Shewi
l
lpayf
orev
ery
thi
ng.
”
Theot herpoli
ceof
ficerl
ookedatt het
heHondaf i
t
taxiandshookhisheadatthedamaget henhe
l
ookedatt he4x4wit hasmalldent.Hewalkedover
totheRubi conwi
thalsoasmal ldentt
hensighed
star
ingscratchontheside.
*
**

Atthehospit
al,
Kaylookedathermothercr
ying
breathi
ngthr
oughthemask.Thedetecti
vel
ookedat
herthenshetookoffoxygent
hemask.
“Shet ri
edtoki
l
l bothofus.Shewalkedi
nthen
stabbedRona,af t
erthatshecameformeatthe
bedr oom t
hentookt hengunandshotme.Her
i
nt enti
onwastoki l
lbothofus.”
Kay’
smotherputt
heoxygenmaskbackonher
daught
er’
sfacest
ari
ngatthepol
i
ceoff
icer
.
“Thatgir
lneedst
opay
.Sheal
mostki
l
ledmy
daughter.
”

3MONTHSLATER…
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#45

Tshenolosubmitt
edherassignment sthenwalked
outoftheschoolpremisesholdinganumbr el
laover
herheadshiel
dinghersel
ffrom themor ni
ngrays.A
cl
assmat ewal
kedov eralsoholdingherumbrell
a.
“
Heygi
rl
…”
Nol
osmiledbuyi
ngadri
nkfr
om ast
reethawker
t
henopenedit
.“Hi,
howareyou?
”
“Good,ei
sh,
it’
shot!If
orgotmyassi
gnment
.Iam
goingbackf
orit.
”
“
Eish.
.Ihopey
ougeti
tont
ime.
.”
“KanaIsawy ourpi
ctur
esoverf
acebook,
congrat
ulat
ions.It
houghty
ouwerejustwear
ingt
hat
ri
ngforfashion.
”
Nol
olaughed.“
Thanks.
”
“
Sowhoi
syourbestl
ady
?”
“
Mybestf
ri
end.
”
Nol
oclosedherumbrel
l
aappr
oachi
ngt
heRanger
t
henopenedthefr
ontdoor
.
“
Bye!
”
Thecl
assmat
elaughed.“
Tlhemmawenakekopa
l
if
t.
”
“
Waaai
ihedoesn’
tli
kepeopl
einhi
scar
.By
elov
e.”
Shegoti
nthecarandleanedoverki
ssi
ngKgosi
.He
drov
eoffashercl
assmatejustst
oodther
e.
“
Whodoesn’
tli
kepeopl
einhi
scar
?”
Tshenol
ochuckl
ed.“
Noone.
”
“
Howwasschool
?”
“
Itwasfi
ne.Isubmi
tt
edt
heassi
gnment
s.If
eel
so
r
eli
eved.
”
Kgosismil
edst
ari
ngather
,Tshenol
olookedathi
m
andchuckl
ed.“
What?
”
“
Nah,
youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
Tshenol
oblushed.“
Thanks.I
t’
sKenny
’sbai
lhear
ing
today
.LetmecallEsiandask.
”
Shedi
aledEsi
reduci
ngt
hev
olumei
nthecar
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
HiEsi
,i
t’
sNol
o.Ar
eyouguy
sal
readyt
her
e?”
“
Wej
ustgott
her
e,ar
eyoucomi
ng?
”
“Yes.Iam onmyway
.Ihadt
osubmi
tan
assignment.
”
“
Ok,
hur
ryt
hought
her
ear
eot
hercasesbef
oreher
s.”
“
Ok.
”
Tshenol
ohungup.“
Babe,
hur
ry.Iam soscar
ed.I
hopeit
’snotgoi
ngt
obedeni
edlikel
astti
me.”
“Theprobl
em ist
hatshest
abbedthewrongperson.
Kay’sf
atherisaf
ormerMini
stersohehasinfl
uence
andgapeenehei sst
il
lastr
ongmemberoft he
rul
ingpart
y.”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
ev et
heyar
etr
eat
ingKennyasi
fsheki
l
led
ahumanbeing.
”
Kgosi
’
sphonerang,
Tshenol
olookedatt
hef
emal
e
namethent
urnedawayashepicked.
“
Yeah?No,
Iwi
l
lcal
lyoul
ater
.Sur
e…”
Hehungup.Tshenol
olookedathi
mt henl ookedat
hernai
l
sfi
ddli
ngwithherfi
nger
ssil
entl
y .Shestart
ed
bi
ti
ngonhernail
s.Kgosil
ookedatherthenchuckled.
“
ItwasmyPAatwor
k.Youcancal
lherback.
”
Embar
rassedshelookedoutt
hrought
hewi
ndow.“
I
di
dn’
tsayanyt
hing.
”
“Youdi
dn’thav
eto.Howi
stheweddi
ngpl
ans
comingup?”
“Good,hi
ri
ngaweddi
ngplanneri
sthebest
,Idon’
t
havetostr
esst
oomuch.”
“
See?Andt
othi
nky
oudi
dn’
twantust
ogether
.”
“Ij
ustdon’
twantust
owast
emoneyt
henst
ruggl
e
aft
erwegetmarri
ed.
”
Kgosist
oppedthecarbytheredtr
aff
ict
henl
eaned
overandki
ssedher.“
Thereisnobudget
.Wheni
t
comestomoney ,
wear egood.”
“
Yourdad,
PastorPi
lane,hecal
l
edmei
nvi
ti
ngusf
or
t
omorrow’
schurchpart
y.”
“
Didy
out
ell
him wear
efl
yi
ngout
?”
“AhhnnaIcouldn’
t.Hewassoexcit
edtal
kingabout
thi
sparty
,youtell
him.Gapeyourmom al
ready
bookedussomebeaut ytr
eat
mentstomorrowtoget
usreadyfort
hatparty
.”
“
Youjusttell
thet
rut
h,wear
egoingtoLondonand
t
herei
snot hi
ngwecandoaboutit
,babeyou’
vegot
t
olear
nt osaynosometi
mes.”
“
Itf
eel
swr
ongsay
ingnot
oyourf
ather
,thepast
or.
”
Kgosi
shookhi
sheadwi
thasmi
l
e.“
Iwi
l
ltel
lthem.
”

*
**

At
sil
elookedattheti
meandsighed.Boi
neel
o
wal
kedov erandgoti
nthecar
.
“
Whatwast
aki
ngsol
ong?
”
Shesi
ghed.“
Lal
aishome.Ij
ustcoul
dn’
tleav
e.”
“Whatdoy oumeany oucoul
dn’
tjustl
eav
e?Youar
e
notakidBoineel
o.Itol
dyouIhavesomewher
etobe
didn’
tI?Isti
l
lhavetodri
vebackt
oGaborone.
”
“Kekopaosekawankomany a,(
Pleasedon’
tshout
atme,)Iam sor
ry.Ther
ewasnothi
ngIcoulddo.
Thereisafunct
ionathome.
”
Atsi
ler
eachedfort
hepl
ast
icsatt
hebackand
handedthem t
oher.
“
Shar
p.”
Shelookedathim not
ici
nghewasannoyedt
hen
l
eanedov erandki
ssedhim.“
Iam sor
ry.
”
Hesighed.“
Ijusthat
ethatIhav
etopr
ayy
oueach
andeverysi
ngleti
me.”
“Whatdoyouwantmet
odo?Can’
tyouseet
he
si
tuat
ionIam i
n?”
“
Iam br
eaki
ngupwi
thy
oursi
ster
.”
Boi
neel
o’shear
tski
pped.“
No!
”
“
What
?”
“
Imean…ei
shAt
sil
e.”
“
Ican’
tstr
ingheral
onganymor
e.Gapetoavoi
dtoo
muchdrama,Iam br
eaki
ngupwit
hher.Iwantt
his
t
obesomet hi
ngseri
ousandi
twon’tbei
fwe
cont
inuesneakingasi
fwear
eki
ds.Il
ovey
ou,
Ican’
t
denyitany
mor e.”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.But
-“
“
Ther
ear
enobut
s.”

*
*

Meanwhi l
efrom adi
stance,Lalawal
kedtothe
tuckshoptal
kingwit
hherf r
iendonthephone.She
pausedstari
ngatAtsil
e’scarthenl
ookedatthe
numberplate.Shesmiled.
“Babes,wewil
ltal
klat
er,
seemsbaedeci
dedt
o
surpr
iseme.”
“
Atsi
l
e?”
“
Yes,
eishmma,
Iam sol
uckyt
ohav
esuchaman.
”
Herfri
endl
aughed.“Youare,
youshouldstopwit
h
yourgamesandjustfocusonyourr
elat
ionshi
p.”
“
Ilongbr
okeupwi t
htheot
herguy
s.I
t’
sonl
yhi
m
t
hesesdays.Letmegotohi
m.”
“
Shar
p.”
Shewal
kedov
er.

I
nthecar,At
sil
enoticedLaonewal
ki
ngov
ert
hrough
t
herear
viewmirror
.
“
Fuck!
’
“
What
?”
“
Lal
a..
”
Boineel
o’sheartski
ppedasshelooked,i
ndeedit
washersi st
erwalki
ngover.At
sil
estart
edthecar
thendroveoffasBoineel
oduckedhidi
nginthecar.

Laonef
rownedconf
usedt
hent
ookoutherphone
cal
li
nghi
m.
“
Babe?
”
“
Hey
…”
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“
Me?
”
“
Yes.Ij
ustsawy
ourcarcl
oset
ohome.
”
“
Iam atcour
twi
thRona,
Ibor
rowedmycart
oa
f
ri
end.”
Laonesi
ghed.“
Oh.
.Igotexci
tedt
hinki
ngi
t’
syou.
”
“
Nah…”
“
Whenam Iseei
ngy
ou?
”
“
Iwi
l
lcal
lyouwhenIl
eav
ecour
t.
”
“
Ok,
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Yeahsur
e.”
Lal
awal kedt
othetuckshopandgotthebaking
powderbefor
ewalkingbackhome.Shebumbedi nt
o
Boineel
obythegat
et hensmil
edstar
ingatthe
thi
ngsshewasholding.
“
Yourboy
fri
endspoi
l
syoubat
hong!
”
Boi
neel
olaughed.“
Het
ri
es.
”
“No,
heist
heshi
t.Youknowwhat
,weshoul
dgoout
onadoubl
edat
esomet i
me.”
Boineel
onoddedt
henwal
kedi
nsi
det
hehousewi
th
hersist
er.

*
**

InMaun, Seletsoparkedhercaratthemallt
hen
steppedoutr ockinghershor
tblondtint
edhair
.She
walkedinsidet hemallt
hentookoutherphoneand
call
edMot husi.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey,Ihav
ear
ri
ved,
Lef
aishomewi
tht
henanny
r
ight
?”
“
Yes.Nanahaspr
epar
edhst
hings.
”
“
Nana?
”
“
Thenanny
.Hernamei
sNana.
”
“
Uhu.Ok,Iam buy
ingacoupl
eoft
hingsatt
hemal
l
t
henIwil
lgoandpickhi
m up.
”
“
Ok.He’
shome.
”
“
Bye.
”
Sheputherphoneawayt henpausedstar
ingata
womaninasummerdr essthatwentdownherhips
holdi
ngwhoseemedl i
keherson.Shewal kedov
er
thensmi
ledapproachi
ngt henanny.
“
Hey
…”
Nanaot
urnedandl
ookedatSel
etso.
“
Ohhi
…”
Seletsor ai
sedhereyebrowssur pr
ised.Shenever
knewt hatNanaowast hispret
tyormay beitwas
seeingherl ooki
ngal
l f
resh.Hermake- upwas
fl
awl essandhernaturalhairwasst yl
ednicel
yasif
shewasgoi ngtoanev entorsomet hi
ng.
“
Wow…y
oul
ookdi
ff
erent
.”
Nanaosmiledunsureofhowtorespondthen
Sel
etsost
retchedherarmstaki
ngherson.
“
Heyboyboy
!”
Lef
agi
ggl
edst
ari
ngathi
smot
her
.
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?Shoul
dn’
tyoubehome?
”
“
Iam pi
cki
ngadr
essf
oranev
ent
.”
“
DoesMot
husi
knowy
ouar
eher
e?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Ok,
let
’sgohomesoy
oucangi
vemehi
scl
othes.
”
“
Ist
il
lhav
en’
tchosent
hedr
ess.
”
“
Whatev
enti
sit
?”
“
Iam escoi
rt
ingMot
husi
toabusi
nesspar
ty.
”
“
Oh…hei
staki
ngy
ou?
”
“
Yes.
”
Nanao’
sphoner
angt
henshesmi
l
ed.
“Heybabe…nobutIj ustbumpedint
ommagweLef a,
Iwil
lpickthedresst
hengohomewi t
hhertogi
ve
herhisclot
hes.Ok…Iloveyoutoo.
”Shehungup
star
ingatSelet
so.
“
Iam goi
ngt
opayf
ort
hedr
ess.
”
“
Wai
t…ar
eyousl
eepi
ngwi
thr
ragweLef
a?”
“
Hei
smyboy
fri
endi
fthat
’sy
ourquest
ion.
”
Selet
sol aughedshaki
ngherhead.“Youwhore.I
knewy ouusedt olookathi
mfunnily.Youmusthave
beensohappywhenwegotdi vorcedormaybey ou
werealreadysleepi
ngwithhi
m? ”
Nanaocal ml ylookedather .“Inev erlookedat
Mot husi i
nanywayt hanmyboss’ shusband.You
weresoi nsecur ethinki
ngIwoul dwanthi m orhe
woul dwantmebecausey ouwer echeat i
ng.Peopl e
whocheatal way sthinkeveryoneel sei scheat i
ng
l
iket hem.Ir espect edy ousomuchasmyempl oyer.
Youcheat edonhi mf orwhatev erreasonsy oumay
havehad, thatisnotmyi ssue.Youl efthim, Ipicked
upwhaty oul eftandhav emadei tmi ne.Iwillnotl et
youdi srespectmecal l
i
ngmenamesasi fIslept
withy ourhusband.Behappywi thy ournewmanand
l
etMot husi be.Let’srespecteachot her ,
Iam not
yourempl oyeeany mor e.Thanky ou.Youcanwai t
herewi thhi m asIgoandpayf ormydr essory ou
canhandLef aov erandwewi llmeetathome, your
choice.”
Sel
etsost
oodst
il
lhol
dingl
efat
henNanaosmi
l
ed.
“
Iguessy
ouwi
l
lwai
t.
”
Shet
urnedandwal
kedi
nsi
det
hemal
l
.
Sel
etsoshookherheadintot
alshockt
hent
ooher
phoneandcall
edMot husi
.
“
Yah?
”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evey
ouar
esl
eepi
ngwi
tht
hemai
d!”
“
Howi
sthaty
ourbusi
ness?
”
“Ipi
tyyou,y
ouhav etosleepwithameremai d?I
can’
tbeli
evethi
s.Youcer t
ainl
yhavesel
festeem
i
ssues.Ican’
tbeli
evethi
s.Whatawow!It hought
youwoulddobetterthanthis.
”
“WhoIseei snotyouri
ssue.,Lett hi
sbet hef ir
stand
l
asttimey outal
kaboutmygi rl
fri
endl ikethat.You
andIar enot
hingbutLefa’
spar ents.Wear ej ustco-
parent
ing.Mybusinessismybusi ness,younev er
hearmeaski ngaboutyourboyfriendwhol ooksold
enought obeyourfat
her.Osekawabat ago
ntwaela.”
*
**

Atcour t
,Ronasatbesi deMaat l
a,hergrandmot her
walkedi nwit
hherbr otherthentheysatinfrontof
them.Linawal kedinwear i
ngherf or
mal sui
tinher
heels.Shewal kedtohersitthensatdownwai t
ing.
Tshenolosighedsitti
ngbesi deKgosi,herphoneoff.
Kayandherf amil
ywalkedi nandsatdownatt he
otherside.Tshenologlaredather.
“
Iwi
shIcanj
ustpunchher
.”
Kgosi
kissedhercheek.“
Iknow.
”
Everyonet urnedasKennywal kedi
nbeingescorted
bythesecur ityguards.Esi
lookedather
,shehad
l
ostwei ghtandherbumphadf i
nal
lypopped
str
etchingherdr ess.Herhairwasheldi
nabun, she
l
ookedatt hem walkingbyhandcuff
edthensmiled
athergr andmot herwhowasl ooki
ngathertear
full
y.
“
Kenny
…”
Tear
sf i
ll
edKenny
’seyesthenshel
ookedaway.Her
complexi
onhaddarkenedandherl
i
pslookedsodry
.
Shelookedli
kesomeonewi t
hkwashi or
koror
suff
eri
ngfrom mal
nutri
ti
onsickness.Shesatdown
besi
deLina.Themagistr
atewalkedinandsatdown
asLinaprepar
edtotakethestand.
.
Li
keandcommenti mmediat
elyaft
ery
our
eadsot
o
haveot
herbonusespost
edfamily
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#46

Kayandherf amil
ysmi l
edasKenny ’sbailgotdenied
yetagain.Shehuggedhermot herhappi ly
.Kennyput
herhandsonherf acecrying.Thej ournali
stthereto
reportastorylookedathersadl y
,hecoul dactuall
y
feelwhatshewasf eeli
nghear ingherbai lgett
ing
decli
nedagai n.May bethi
st i
mear oundhehadt o
highli
ghtjusthowt hedefendant ’
sf atherhad
i
nf l
uence,may bethatwoul dyieldbet t
erresult
s.Lina
sadlylookedatKennycr y
ingandhuggedher .
“
Iwi
l
lkeept
ryi
ng.
”
“
Idon’
twantt
ogv
ebi
rt
hher
e.”
Linasnif
fedthenlookedbehindasKenny ’
s
grandmothercri
edwhi l
eEsi putherhandsonher
face.Thesecuri
tyguardscamef orherthenhel
ped
herup.KennyheldLina’shandcr y
ingasthey
draggedheraway .Shelookedathergrandmother
.
“
Mmama!
Mmama!
”
Hergr
andmot
herst
oodupcr
ying.
“
Mmama!Nt
huse!(
Hel
pme.
)”
Hergrandmotherheldherheadcr yi
ngwithher
granddaught
er.Kay’
smot herhelpedherdaughterup
andtheywalkedoutsmi l
ing.Ronaclosedhiseyes
tr
yingnottocrythentheyfinal
l
ywal kedout
side.
Li
nawal kedovertothem.
“Theyareplayingdi r
tybutIam goingtoappealf
or
anotherbai
l hearing,t
histi
mear oundpoint
ingout
howt hi
smagi strateiswellconnectedt
oKay ’
sfat
her
.
Shewi l
lgetbail.
”
Ronasi
ghed.“
Iwishitwasmei
nst
eadofher
.She
di
dnothi
ngwrong.”
Li
nashr
ugged.“
Wel
ll
if
eisunf
air
.”
Esicl
earedhert
hroat.“Whataboutt
hebaby
?She
can’
tgiv
ebirthi
nsidether
e.”
“Ofcausetheywil
ltakehert
ot hehospital
thenli
ke
shewassay i
ng,hergrandmotherwil
ltakethebaby
andwiththehel
pofherbr ot
her’swi
fe,shewi l
l
manage.”
“
Iwi
sht
hisal
lcanbeov
er.
”
At
sil
esighed.“
Won’
tthefactt
hatherf
atherhas
i
nfl
uencemessupwiththecase?”
Li
nasmi l
ed.“No.WhenIam incourt,
nothingcan
messupwi thmycase.Letthem keepdoingthi
s,
whenit’
sti
mef orthet
ri
al,
someonei sgoingtolose
hi
sorherjob.WhenIexposeandembar rass,Imake
sur
e.”
Rona’
sphonerangt
henhet
ooki
toutandanswer
ed
theunsav
ednumber.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
..i
t’
sme.
”
Hesteppedawayf
rom ev
ery
one.“
Whatt
hef
uckdo
youwant?”
“
Iknowy
ouwanty
ourl
i
ttl
egi
rl
fr
iendr
eleasedf
rom
j
ail
.”
“
KayI
-“
“
Shhr el
ax,
Icanhelpyou.Youwantherout
,fi
ne.My
f
atherhasthati
nfl
uencebutonl
yify
ousleepwith
me.”
“
What
?”
“
Sleepwi
thme.Iwanty
ourbabyt
oo.
”
“Youareinsane.Whatarey
ousmoki
ng?Iwil
lnev
er
sleepwit
hy ouevenify
ouhadtobet
helastwoman
onearth.
”
“Wel
lIguessy
ouwantKennyt
oremai
ninj
ail
,your
choi
ce.
”
Ronat
hought
ful
l
ypr
essedr
ecor
d.
“Howsuream It
hatonceIsl
eepwi
thy
ou,
youwi
l
l
haveKenny
’sbai
lapprov
ed.”
“
Justcomeov
er.Iwi
l
lsendy
out
headdr
ess.
”
Shehungupt
henhecur
sedbeneat
hhi
sbr
eat
h.

*
**

AtMothusi’
shouse,
Selet
sostoodinthesit
ti
ng
room,t
hewholesetuphadchangedandt herewas
newfurni
tur
e.Nanaowalkedoverwit
hthebag
conat
aini
ngLefa’
sclot
hes.
“
Ok,
ther
ewego.
”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
eveMot
husi
issl
eepi
ngwi
thy
ou.
”
Nanaosi ghed.“Seletsoyoushouldbehappyt hati
t’
s
wit
hmebecauseal readyIusedt otakecareofy our
sonandIal readylovedhim.Iam notgoi ngt oabuse
hi
m, Iknowwhatheneedsandwant s,
thi
si san
advantagetoy oubecausei t
’snotsomeoney ou
don’tknow,y ouknowmeandy ouknowy oursonis
safeinmyhands.I fyoucouldleavehim alldaywith
me, whatcanpossi blygowrongnowt hatItakecare
ofhimt hewhol edayandev eningtoo?”
“Idon’
thaveaproblem wit
hy ouandLef
a,Iam j
ust
surpri
sedt
hat’
sallbecauseitmeansyoulong
wantedhim ev
enbef or
eIlefthi
m.”
“That
’swhatyout
hink,
ther
eisnot
hingIcando
aboutthat
.”
Sel
etsoshookherheadandwal
kedout.Sheput
Lef
aont hecarsatt
hengoti
nhercaranddroveof
f
di
ali
nghersist
er.
“
Hey
…”
“
Youwon’
tbel
i
eve!
”
“
What
?”
“
Mot
husi
issl
eepi
ngwi
tht
hemai
d.”
“
Oh…”
“
Whatdoy
oumeanoh?
”
“
Isawt
hem t
oget
hert
heot
hert
ime.
”
“
Andy
oudi
dn’
tthi
nky
oushoul
dtel
lme?
”
“
Idi
dn’
tthi
nki
twasnecessar
y.”
“
Wow!
”
“What’
sy ourissueLetso?Youl ef
thim andsome
otherwomant ookhim.Tobehonest ,thatgi
rltakes
careofyourson, shegiveshim herbest.Youleft
yoursonev enaf t
erItoldyoutotakehim.Yousai d
youdon’twantdr ama, don’
tbri
ngthedr ama.”
“
Ijustcan’
tbel
i
evehewoul
dfuckt
hemai
d.”
“Wel
lbeli
evei
t.Cl
ear
lyheisi
nlov
ewi
thher
.Pl
ease
don’
ttel
lmeyouarejeal
ous.
”
“
Jeal
ousofwhat
?Amai
d?”
“
Yousoundsobi
tt
er.
”
“
Iam notbi
tt
erbutj
ustsur
pri
sed.Ican’
tbel
i
evehe
i
ssl
eepingwit
hamai d.
”
“Sheisbeaut
if
ulandl
oveshi
sson,
whycan’
thel
ove
her?”
“
Yousuppor
tthi
s?”
“Doesn’tmat terifIsupporti
tornot.St
opbeing
bit
ter
, Iam sickandt i
redofwomenwhol eav
etheir
menmov ingonandt henwhenher epl
acesyou,you
nowt urnintoabi tterbabymamacausi ng
unnecessarydr ama.Cany oufocusony our
rel
ati
onshipandl eavehim datewhoeverhewantsto
dateinpeace? ”
“
Iwasnotbei
ngbi
tt
er.
”
“I
fyouar
enotbei
ngbi
tt
ert
henj
ustst
ayawayf
rom
hi
slovel
if
e.”
“
Youar
eri
ght
.”
“Yes.Justl
ethim dat
ewhoeverhewant
stodate.
Don’trui
nthepeacethati
sther
e.Sti
ckt
oLefa’
s
i
ssuesandl eav
ehi sl
ovel
if
ealone.
”
“
Youar
eri
ght
.”
“
Yeah,
soy
ouar
egoi
nghome?
”
“Yeah,
Iam sl
eepingt
her
etoni
ghtt
hent
omor
rowI
am goi
ngback.”
“
Ok.Iwi
l
lcomel
ateron.
”
“
Shar
p.”
Sel
etsohungupanddr
ovet
oherpar
ent
’shouse.

*
**

Kefi
lweletheroldmaninsideherhouse.Hel ooked
atherdaughterwhowasint hesitti
ngroom writ
ing
herhome-work.Shewast hickwi thhipsandbreast,
seemedpuber t
ywasslowl yr eachi
ng.
“
Mia,
got
othebedr
oom.
”
Miasighedthenst
oodupandwal
kedt
othe
bedroom i
nhershort
swhi
let
heol
dmanlookedat
her.
“
Thi
schi
l
dhasr
ipe.
”
Kef
il
wel
ookedathi
m.“
What
?”
Hecl
ear
edhi
sthr
oat
.“Imeanshei
sgr
owi
ngf
ast
.”
“
Ehe…y
ousai
dyouwoul
dgi
vememoneyf
orf
ood.
”
Theol
dmanl ickedhi
sli
psst
ari
ngatKif
il
we’swide
hi
ps.“
Ithoughtwewouldhav
esomef unfi
rst
.”
“Wewil
lhav
esomef unaft
ery
ougiv
em money
,Iam
pay
ingt
hatladywho’
scarwasdamaged.
”
Theol
dmant ookoutafewnot
esofmoneyand
gavet
hem t
oher.Kefi
l
wecountedt
henf
rowned.
“
Onl
yP200?
”
“
That
’sal
lIhav
e.”
“
Thenl
eav
emyhouse.
”
“Ei
shKef i
l
we…”Het ookaP100not eandhandedit
toher.Kefi
lweshov
edt hemoneyinherbreast
smil
ing.Herphonestar
tedringi
ngasshekissedher
oldman.Shepausedandpi cked.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Iwantmydaught
er.
”
Kef
il
we’
shear
tski
pped.“
Who’
sthi
s?”
“
Kennet
h.Iwantmydaught
erKef
i.
”
Tearsfi
l
ledKef
il
we’
sey
esasherhear
tpounded.
“Kennet
h…”
“Look,Iknowyouhateme.Iwouldhatemetoo.ButI
wantmydaught er
.Iam dy
ing.Ican’
tdi
ewit
hout
seeingher.”
“
Youshoul
dhav
elongdi
ed.
”
“Iwantmydaughtert
ogetwhat
’sri
ght
ful
l
yher
s.I
am dyi
ng,
Idon’thavemucht
ime.”
“
Your
apedme!Ican’
tbel
i
evey
ouar
est
il
lal
i
ve.
”
“
Kef
ipl
ease…”
“
Mydaughterwon’
tmeetwit
hyou.Ir
aisedheral
one.
Wit
hmybloodandsweat.
”
“Iam dyi
ng.Sheneedstotakeheri
nheri
tancebef
ore
Idieorel
setheywon’tgi
veheranyt
hing.
”
“
Shei
sstudyingabr
oad.Shecan’
tcome.ButIwi
l
l
t
akei
tforherify
ouareseri
ous.
”
“
Ok.”Kennet
hcoughed.“
Myl
awy
erwi
l
lcont
acty
ou.
What’
shername?”
“
Kenei
l
weLaol
ang.
”
“
Ok,mylawyerwil
lcal
lyou.
”Hecoughedagai
nthen
t
hephonecallcut
.Kef
il
wesmil
edhappil
ythen
t
urnedt
otheol dman.
“
Leav
e.Iam t
ir
ed.Ican’
thav
esext
oday
.”
“
What
?”
“
Leav
e.”
“
Giv
ememymoney
.”
Shet
ookoutt
hephoneandt
hrewi
tathi
m.
“
Out
!”
Theoldmanclickedhi
stongueandwalkedout.Kefi
smiledr
ecal
li
ngjusthowKennethwasrichwhenhe
rapedher
.Shewassur ehewasfarmuchr i
chernow.

*
**
Maatlasi
ghedwaiti
ngf
orEsii
nthecarwhi
leshedi
d
abitofshoppi
ng.Hepi
ckedhi
sphoneansweri
nghi
s
f
ather’
scall
.
“
Howdi
ditgo?
”
Heswal
l
owed.“
Shewasdeni
edbai
lagai
n.”
“
Wher
eisy
ourbr
other
?”
“
Hewentt
ohi
shouse.
”
Hi
sfathersighed.“
Iwonderhowt
hatgi
rl
’sf
ami
l
yis
f
eel
ingrightnow.”
“
Theyar
eshut
ter
ed.Ev
ery
onei
s.”
“
Hasshegi
venbi
rt
h?”
“
Noty
et.Shewi
l
lpr
obabl
ygi
vebi
rt
hinj
ail
.”
“I
fevery
ourbr
otherget
sbackwi
thher
,wehav
eal
ot
ofdamagetof
ix.
”
Maatl
afr
ownedst
ari
ngatBof
elopushi
ngababy
st
rol
l
er.
“
Papa,
Iwi
l
lcal
lyouback.
”
Hehungupt
hengotoutoft
hecar
.
“
Bof
elo!
”
Bofel
oturnedandlookedathi
m,herhear
tpoundi
ng.
Shequickenedherstepst
ohercarbutMaat
lapul
led
herbackwithherhand.
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“
Leav
emeal
one!
”
Helookedinsi
det
hebabyst
rol
lerandstar
edatthe
babypeaceful
l
ysl
eepi
ngwhil
esuckingherfi
st.
“
Ist
hat
….”
“
Cany
oul
eav
emeal
one.
”
“
Fuck!
”
“
Iam notaski
ngf
orany
thi
ngf
ory
ou.
”
Heputhi
shandsi
nhi
sheadf
eel
i
ngweak.
“
Pleaseleav
emeal
one.Shei
smi
ne.Got
oyour
f
amily.
”
Helookedatthebabyagainthenpickedherup.
Bof
elotearf
ull
ylookedathi
m ashehel dhergentl
yin
hi
sarms.Itwast hosesamearmst hatshehadfel
t
sosafeinatsomepoi nt
.Atearrol
l
eddownt henshe
wi
pedi
taway
.Maat
lal
ookedather
.
“
What
’shername?
”
“
Sapphi
re.
”
“
What
?”
“
Sapphi
re.
”
Maatl
afr
owned.“
Sapphi
re?Asi
ncor
undum ort
he
col
or?
”
“
Bot
h.”
Hesmi l
ed.“
Didyouev
erimagi
nehowitwouldbe
fi
veyearsfr
om nowwhenshehastowri
teher
name?”
Bof
elol
aughed.“
It
’sabeaut
if
ulname.
”
“
Iti
s.Shei
sbeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Icanseey
ournose.
”
“
Yourl
i
psr
uinedi
t.
”
Helaughed.“
Osi
mol
otseaker
e?(
Youhav
est
art
ed
r
ight?
)”
Shesmi
l
edget
ti
ngcl
oser
.“Iam t
ell
i
ngy
ou.
”
Maatl
a’
sphonest
art
edri
nging.Hegaveherbackt
he
babyt
henl
ookedathi
swifecall
ing.
“
CanIcal
lyoul
ater
?”
“
Idon’
twantt
obesued.
”
“
Youwon’
tbe…pl
ease.
”
Shesav edhernewnumberi
nhisphoneputherbaby
i
nt hecaranddroveof
fwhil
ehewalkedbacktohis
carpicki
ngthecal
l.
“
Hey
…”
“
Comeandhel
pme.
”
“
Ok.
”

*
**

Thatev
eningAronasteppedoutofthet
axiwi
tha
bagonhisbackcall
i
ngKaywi ththenewnumber
.
“
Hey
…”
“
Opent
hegat
e.”
“
Ok.
”
Shehungupopeni
ngthegatet
henhewalkedi
n
weari
ngal
lbl
ack.Sheopenedt
hedoorf
orhim
smil
i
ng.
“
Hey
…”
“
Hi.
”
Shemov edfr
om thedoorlet
ti
nghimi n.Ronatook
offhiscapst
ari
ngather.Kaylookedathim and
smiled.
“
Iam happyy
oucoul
dcome.
”
Shetr
iedt
ot ouchhim buthest
eppedback.She
l
ookedatthegloveshewasputtingon.
“
Iknowy
ouhat
eme.
”
“
Hat
eisanunder
stat
ement
.”
Kaysmiled.“
Iam sorr
y.”Shet
ookoffherdr
ess
remai
ningnaked.“Ial
sowanttocar
ryyourchi
l
d.”
“
Whoel
seknowsIam her
e?”
“
Noone.
”
“
Youar
ely
ing.Youpr
obabl
ytol
dsomeone.
”
“
Iswear
,It
oldnoone.
”
“
Letmeseey
ourphone.
”
Shet
ooki
tthenunl
ockedi
tandhandedi
ttohi
m.
“
Itol
dnooneRona.
”
Hewentthr
oughi
tforawhi
l
ethenputi
tdownand
l
ookedather
.
“
YouknowIhav
ebeent
hinki
ng…”
“
What
?”
“Wi
thyououtofthewayasawit
ness,
Kennycanget
awaywit
hit
.AllIhav
etodoiski
l
lyou.
”
Kaylookedathi sser
iousfacethenturnedaround
tryi
ngtorunbutRonapul l
edherandputhi shand
aroundhermout handnosewi thaclothf r
om his
pocket.Kaykickedtr
yingtogetawayt henslowly
stoppedfight
inggett
ingdizzyandfainted.Ronaput
theclothbackinhispocketlay
ingherdown.Het ook
offhisbagandt ookouttheropelookingaroundher
house.
*
**

Awhi l
el aterhewalkedoutofherhousethen
j
umpedov erthewallgett
ingtothenei
ghbor’
shosue.
Hequi cklygotoutthroughthegateunnoti
cedand
disappearedi nthedarknesschewingt
henewSI M
card.
.
.

.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#47

Kay’smotherfr
owneddr ivi
nginthr
oughher
daughter’
sopengatethenparkedbesidehercar
confused.Kayneverl
eftthegateopen,notwit
hthe
wayshewasscar edoft hi
eves.Shesteppedoutand
walkedtothedoorthenknocked.
“Kay !Kay!”Sheopenedt hedoorthenwal kedi
n.Her
phonesl ippedfrom herhandsasshel ookedather
daught erhangingfr
om ther oof
.Shet r
iedrunni
ng
ov erbutslippedfal
l
ingonwhatsmel tl
ikepee.She
frownedt hengotupshaki ng.
“
God…”
Sher ai
sedt hechairl
ookingaroundf orsomethi
ngt o
cutther opewi thbutwithpanic,sheseemedt onot
beabl etot hinkproperl
y.Sheli
mpedt otheki
tchen
whereshecamebackwi thakni f
ethensl owl
ygoton
thechai randcutt herope.Kay’sbodyf el
lwit
hat hud
onthef loor.Hermot herquickl
ytookherphoneand
call
edt heambul ancetr
yingtofeelforherdaughter’
s
pul
sebutt
her
ewasnot
hing.

*
**

Thatsamenight
,Kennylayont
hebedwithherhand
onherasherbabymov edki
cki
ng.Herf
ri
endlooked
ather.
“
Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?Hei
sst
il
lki
cki
ngt
oomuch?
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
May
bei
t’
sashe.
”
“
No,i
t’
sahe.”Thef
ri
endl
ookedatKennyandsi
ghed.
“
Youaregoi
ngtobefi
ne.
”
“
Iwasn’
tasmar
tst
udentatschool
.”
Herf
ri
endsmi
l
ed.“
Iwasn’
ttoo.
”
Kennychuckled.“Ial
way shadtowor kextr
ahar d.I
wentt ofor
m 1wi thaD.Theywoul dcallmest upi
d,
theteachersli
kedcall
ingmenames.For m 1same
thi
ng.Icouldn’
tevenreadpr oper
ly.Ihadtopracti
ce
alot.Iwouldgetscaredwhent heteachermadeus
allonebyoner eadbecauseIknewwheni tgottomy
turn…t heywoul dl aughatme. ”Shewi pedawayher
tearssni ffing.“ Ididn’tsl
eepf ormyf orm 3exams, I
readdayandni ght.IgotaC, Iwasov erjoyed.I
coul dn’tbel i
evei t.Itwasunr eal.Mygr andmot her
wassohappyshepr ayedt heent i
renight .That
womani sapr ay erwar ri
or.Thenshegotsi ckfor m 4,
shest artedf orget ti
ng,shewoul dwonderar ound
naked.Icoul dn’tconcent rateatschool .Itwashar d
to.Theycal l
edmygr andmot hernames…t heycal led
menames…It houghtIwasgoi ngt ofai lbutIdi dn’t.I
passed.IpassedandImadei t.Iwentt oschool .I
wor kedhar dt her e.Ronawas…If elli
nl ov ewith
him…i tjusthappened. ”Kennyl ookedatherf riend,
tearsr unni ngdownhercheeks.“ I
tjusthappened
andIf ellhardf orhi m.Hesai dhel ovedme…I
believedhi m.Icl ungont oev er ywor dhesai d.When
Iwentf ormyi nt ernship…t herewast hi sguy …I
resistedt empt ationbecauseIknewwher emyhear t
was…andwhenIcomeback. .Ifoundhi m wi t
hher …
therewast hissetupandmusi cwaspl ay i
ng.Fool ish
me…f oolishmet houghtitwasf orme.Iwas
conv incedbutt hent herewer eheel sandat hong.At
fi
rsthesai dheboughtt heheel sformet hent he
thong…hesai dhecoul dexplai
n…buttherewas
someoneel se…t herewassomeoneel seinthe
house.Itookakni fe…Idon’tknowwhatIwas
thi
nkingandIj uststabbed.Hemovedt henIwentt
o
thebedroom, thereshewas…naked.Sheseemedso
unbothered.Idon’tknowwhatcameov erme…he
couldn’
texplain….Shekepttalki
ng…shesaidsheis
call
ingthepolice…Iwasmad.Iwashur tandItook
thegun…”
Kennybr
okedowncr
ying.Herf
ri
endhuggedher
.
“
Ithashappened…t
her
eisnot
hingy
oucandonow.
.”
“Iwantt
otakebackt hehandsoftime…Iwantt
ogo
backandwalkaway …IalwayssaidIwouldwal
k
away…Ijustdon’tknowwhyIdidn’tt
hatday
.I
shoul
dhav ewalkedaway.”
Shefr
ownedast
hebabyki
ckedmor
e.Herf
ri
end
l
ookedather
.
“Iki
l
ledourkids.Ikil
ledthem becausehel ef
tmef or
anotherwomanandhewasr efusingtopay
maintenance.Isuff
ocatedthem all.Whatdoy ou
thi
nkIam goingt hr
oughr i
ghtnow.Iam f aci
ng
possibl
ylif
einjail
.SometimesIdr eam ofthem
cryi
ngandsomet i
mesIjustwi sh…IwishIhadj ust
l
etitgo.Thepain.Somet i
mesi t’
snott hatt
heot her
womani smor ebeautif
ulthany oubutjustthathe
j
ustlostinter
est.Hedoesn’tloveyouany moreand
that
’sonet hi
ngIfail
edtounder st
and.Youst il
lhave
achance.Youar enotgoingtodi ehere.Youar esti
l
l
young,Youcanst il
lmakethingsright
.”

*
**

Nanaol ookedatherselfonthemi r
rori
nher
beauti
fuleveni
nggown.Shet wi r
ledonthemi r
ror
thensmi l
ed.Mothusiwal kedinthenpausedstari
ng
ather,
heal mostdidn’trecognizeherinthatdr
ess.
Nanaosmi l
ed.
“
Doy
oul
i
kei
t?”
Mot
husi
smi
l
ed.“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Real
l
y?”
Hewal
kedov
erandhel
dherwai
stki
ssi
nghercheek.
“
Yes.Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Thanks.
”
“
Let
’sgo.
”
Nanaopickedherpursewi t
hherbeaut
if
ul nai
lst
hen
walkedoutwithher.Heopenedthedoorforherand
shegotinthecar.Shewatchedhim wal
kr oundthe
carthenhegotin.Shefoundhersel
fsmil
ingalone.
Mothusist
artedthecarthendroveout
.

*
**

Esil
ookedatMaat
laastheywatchedthemov
ie,
it
seemedasifi
twasonlyhisbodypresent
.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
Het
urnedt
oher
.“What
?”
“
Arey
ouok?
”
“
Yeah…”
Esi
sighed.“
Iam al
sowor
ri
edaboutKenny
.”
“
Ican’
timagi
newhatRonai
sgoi
ngt
hrough.
”
“
Iwi
shIcanj
ustki
l
lthatgi
rl
.”
“
Makesbot
hofus.
”
Esi
laughed.“
Ilov
eyou.Pl
easedon’
tev
erhur
tme.
”
Maat
lal
ookedather
.“Il
ovey
out
oo.
”
Shekissedhi
m.“Whenal
lthi
sisover
,Iwantt
ogot
o
Kasane.Iam y
ear
ningav
acati
on.”
“
Babe,
don’
tmakemei
magi
neal
ot.Iam comi
ng.
”
Hegotupandwalkedtothebathr
oom whil
eEsisai
d
t
urni
ngheratt
enti
ontotheTV.Hisphonestar
ted
r
ingi
ng,shel
ookedati
tthentookitpi
cki
ng.
“
Hel
l
o?”
Ther
ewassil
ence.Esi
lookedatt
hecal
l
erI
Dandi
t
wasanunsav
ednumber .
“
Hel
l
o?”
Thecal
lerhungup.Esicur
iousl
ywentthr
oughhi
s
messagesthensmiledputt
ingi
tbackdown.Maat
la
wal
kedbackt hensatbesi
deherki
ssingher
.
“
Yourphoner
ang.
”
“
Whowasi
t?”Her
eachedf
ori
tassheshr
ugged.
“Idon’
tknow…t
heper
sonhungupassoonasI
answered.
”
Heputthephonedownthenputhisarmsaroundhi
s
wif
ecuddli
ngherastheywatchedthemovi
e.
Secondsl
aterhel
ookedatherfeel
i
ngguil
ty.
“
Babe…t
her
eissomet
hingIwantt
otel
lyou.
”
Esi
smi
l
ed.“
What
?”
Heopenedhi
smouthtosaysomethi
ngbutt
hen
si
ghedandki
ssedher
.“Il
oveyou.
”
Esi
blushed.“
Met
oo.
”

*
**

Thefoll
owingday
,AronalookedatKennysitdown,
herhandonherstomach.Shelookedreadytopush
outthebaby.
“
Hi…”
Shel
ookedathi
m andsmi
l
ed.“
Hi…”
Ther
ewassilenceashelookedathernotsureof
whattosay
.Shesmi l
ed.“
Youshouldshave.You
l
ookli
keawi l
dthing.
”
Hel
aughed.“
Wil
dthi
ng?
”
“
Gat
we,
homoer
ect
orkanagat
weng?
”
“
Youar
ecr
azy
.”
Shesmil
ed.“
Youshoul
dreal
l
yshav
e.I
t’
snotcut
e
anymor
e.”
“
Eemma.
”
Shesmil
ed.“
Youshoul
deatt
oo.Youar
elosi
ng
wei
ght.
”
“
Iwi
shwecanswi
tchpl
aces.
”
Kennyl
aughedtear
ful
l
y.“
Met
oo.Iwi
shwecan
swit
chpl
aces.
”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Stopapol
ogi
zi
ng.Ar
eyour
eadyf
ort
hebaby
?”
“
Notwi
thouty
ou.That
’snothowIi
magi
nedi
t.
”
“
Nei
therdi
dIi
magi
nei
tli
ket
hisbutwehav
etof
ace
r
eal
i
ty.
”
“
Thoughtofnames?
”
“
No.Iam notsur
eoft
hegender
.”
“
Iam goi
ngt
obeher
eti
l
lyouwal
koutoft
hispl
ace.
”
Kennyshookherhead.“Youshouldmoveon.You
ar
et oool
dtobewai t
ingaroundforaj
ail
bir
d.”
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Youshouldtaket
hatl
ovesomewhereel
seandgi
ve
i
ttosomeonemoredeserv
ing.Imi
ghtdi
eher
e.
Whatwil
lyoudo?”
“
Iwi
l
ldi
ewi
thy
ou”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Mxm…Iam bei
ngser
ious.
”
“Soam I
.Iam goi
ngt
owai
tfory
ou.Iswear
.Ar
eyou
eati
ng?
”
“
Yes.Buti
t’
sjai
lfood.I
t’
snott
hebestoft
hebest
.”
“
Youhav
elostwei
ghtt
oo.
”
Kennylaughed.“Iam al
l
owedto.Iam i
njai
l
.Youar
e
outther
e.Pleasegoandshave.”
“
Ok.Ihavebeenkeepi
ngy
ourcar
,shoul
dIgi
vei
tto
y
ourgrandmother
?”
“Yes.Kef
il
wemayt r
yandtakei
tawayf
rom y
ou.Or
youcanselli
tandusethemoneyt
ohel
ppayLina.
Sheisexpensi
ve.
”
“
Icanaff
ordLi
naandIam notsel
l
ingwhatIbought
f
oryouasapresent
.”
“Ok.Thengi
vei
ttomygr
andmot
her
.Shewi
l
lkeepi
t
safe.
”
“
Ok.
”
Kennypausedatt
hesli
ghtpai
nshewasf
eel
i
ngt
hen
rubbedherst
omach.
“WhenAr atwaorQui ntonarri
ve,pleasesuppor
tyour
chil
d.Mygr andmot herwil
lneedy ourassist
ant
.Even
i
fy oufindanewgi rlf
ri
end,explai
nt oherthaty
ou
haveachi l
d.Idon’twantmychi l
dt ogrowupli
keme.
Iwanthert ofeelwhatapar ent’
slov ei
ssupposedto
feell
ike.Iwon’tbetheretogivethatbuty ouar
e.Ke
kopaoratengwanawagagoRona.
”Shest
oodup
thensmil
edthroughhert
ear
s.“
Byt
heway,t
hanks
forthet
oil
etr
y.”
Ronasadl
ywatchedherwalkawaythengotupand
l
eft
.Hegotinhiscarandtookadeepbreat
hbefor
e
pi
cki
nghisbrot
her’
scall
“
Atsi
l
e?”
“
Didy
ouhear
?”
“
About
?”
“
Kay
.”
“
Whathappened?
”
“
Appar
ent
lyshecommi
tt
edsui
cidel
astni
ght
.”
“
Oh?
”
“
Yeah…”
“
Why
?”
“
Idon’
tknow,
hermot
herf
oundher
.”
“
Shame.
”
“
Ijustdon’
tunder
standwhyshewoul
dki
l
lher
sel
f.
Yest
erdayshewassohappyt
henshej
ustdeci
ded
toki
l
lhersel
f.
”
“
Icoul
dnev
erunder
standher
.”
“
Arey
oucomi
ngt
otheof
fi
cet
oday
?”
“
Yeah,
Iam onmyway
.Iwentt
oseeKenny
.”
“
Ok.
”
Hehungupanddr
oveaway
.

*
**

Hourslater
,Kennygrunt
edinthelaborr
oom pushi
ng
outherbaby.Sweatrandownherf or
eheadasshe
usedallherst
rengt
ht opush.Themidwif
elookedat
her.
“Kenny,Iwanty
outogi
vemeabi gpushok?Youar
e
ther
e.Thebabyisr
eadyfory
ou.Coughwhil
e
pushingok?”
Kennynoddedt
hent
hemi
dwi
fesl
appedhert
high.
“Push!
”
Sher aisedherheadcoughingwhi l
epushing.Shedid
i
ttwi cethenthebaby’sheadstretchedhervagina
sli
dingoutf ol
lowedbyhisentir
ebody .Themi dwi
fe
tookt hebabyashecr i
edwi t
hadeepv oi
ce.Kenny
brokedowncr yi
ngthenmidwifecleaedthebabyand
handedhi mt oKennywhilehecr i
ed.
“
Hisnamei
sQui
nton…Qui
ntonMot
samai
.”
.
.
Li
keandcommentassoonasy our
eadsowecan
getanot
herbonuswhi
chi
sjustwai
ti
ngfami
l
y
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#48

Kay’smot
hershookherheadst
ari
ngatt
hepol
i
ce
off
icer
.
“Mydaught
erwoul
dnev
erki
l
lher
sel
f.Shewas
happy
.”
“That’
swhaty outhought,youthoughtshewas
happybutpeopl earedealingwi thalotoutthere.
Andal levi
denceshowssheact uall
yki
ll
edher sel
f.
Wewentt hroughherphone, therewasnot hi
ng.
Somet hingmusthav ehappenedwhenshewas
overseas,somet hi
ngshedi dn’ttel
lyouandall t
his
whileshehasbeenbat tl
i
ngwi t
hi t
.”
“
Idon’
tbel
i
evei
t.Someoneki
l
ledher
.”
Thepoli
ceof fi
cersi
ghed.“Shekill
edhersel
f.We
havecheckedf orever
ythi
ng,f
ingerpri
ntsand
ever
ythi
ngel se,noonewasint hathouseexpectf
or
yourdaughter.”
“
What
’sgoi
ngt
ohappent
ohercase?
”
“
Wit
hwhat
?”
“
Shei
sdeadnow…what
’sgoi
ngt
ohappen?
”
“I
twil
lcont
inue.Thet
rial
wil
lgoon.Gohomeand
getsomesleep.Youseem t
oneedit
.”
“Youdon’tknowhowt odoy ourjob,
doy ouknow
whoKay ’sfat
heris?Youar egoingtoregretnot
taki
ngthisseri
ously.Mydaught erwouldnever
commi tsui
cide.Kaydidn’thaveanyproblem.
Obviousl
ysomeonest agedallofthi
s.”
“
Doy
ouhav
eanyev
idencet
owhaty
ouar
esay
ing?
”
“Youar et
heonewhoissupposedt
ogett
he
evidence,
It’
syourj
ob!
”
“Allt
heev idencefoundshowedt hatshekil
led
herself
,youar egoingt ogettheaut opsyreportandi
t
willt
ellyout hesamet hing.I
fr eall
yyourdaughter
waski l
ledt henwhoev erdiditwassogoodbecause
theydidn’tleaveanytraceofev i
dencebehind.
Nothingshowsshewaswi thsomeoneatt hatti
me.
Wespoket oherfr
iendsandt heysaidthesame
thi
ngy ousai dKayt ol
dy ou.”
“Iam goi
ngtohi
resomeonewhocandowhaty
ou
arefai
li
ngtodo.
”
“
What
evermakesy
ouhappy
.”
Kay’
smot herangr
il
ywalkedoutwi
pingawayher
tear
sthengotinhercar
.

*
**

Ar
onawalkedi
nsideKenny’
sgrandmot
her
’sroom
wher
eherbrot
herandsist
erin-
lawwer
esi
tti
ng.
“
Son…”
“
Goodev
eni
ng.
”
“
Howar
eyou?
”
“
Iam f
ine.
”
HelookedaroundthensawKenny
’sgr
andmother
sl
eeping.Hesatdownonthechai
rwai
tingt
ohear
whattheyhadcall
edhimfor
.
“
Wenev
ert
oldy
ouhowmuchweappr
eci
atewhat
youhav
ebeendoi ng,payi
ngforKenny’
slawyer
,
payi
ngforourtr
ips,t
herehavebeenalotofupand
downsandy ouhaveenduredall
thecostal
lby
your
sel
fwithoutcomplai
nt.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
MmagweTumosi lentlysatbesi deherhusbandas
hespoke.“ Wehadagr eedtot akei nKenny ’sbaby
onceshewasbor nbecauseKennyi sasgoodasour
grandchild.Buthergr andmot her’sheal t
hhav ebeen
deteri
orating,herbloodpr essurei salway shigh.
Kenny’scasehasbeenr eallystressingher .Sheis
notsanemostoft het i
me.Nowi twillbeimpossi bl
e
totakeinKenny ’
schildbecauseourhandsar efull
withhergr andmot her.Wewer epl anningtospeakt o
afewr elativeswhocoul dgi veusahel pinghandbut
mywi fethoughtwewoul dtellyouf irsti
ncasey ou
wantedt ot akethebaby .”
Ronalookedatthem.“Idon’
thaveaprobl
em wi
th
rai
singmychil
d.It’
sfi
ne.Iwil
lspeakt
oKennyabout
i
t.”
“
Thanky
ousomuchson.Wef
ear
edt
ell
i
ngher
becauseshei
sjustdeal
i
ngwi
thal
otatt
he
moment .
”
“It
’sok, Iunder
stand.Myfamilyi
salsowellal
ertof
thesituationandwet houghtKenny’
sbai
lwouldbe
approv edsowecanpaybogadi fort
hechil
dbut …”
“
Under
standabl
e.”
“
Um t
hanky
ou.
”
Theynodded,hewal kedoutandgoti
nhi scarwi
tha
si
gh.Honestlyhedidn’tevenknowwhathehadt o
dowithanewbor nbaby .Hehadnevertakencareof
onebefore.Hestar
tedt hecaranddr
oveof fast
he
phonerang.
“
Hel
l
o?”
Hesteppedont hebreaksasthecarinfr
ontofhi
m
unexpectedl
ystoppedthenshookhishead
overt
akingitwhil
eladyspoke.
“
Uhwhatdi
dyousay
?”
“Isai
dKenei l
weLaol anggavebi
rt
h.Wet r
iedcal
li
ng
hergrandmot herbutsheisnotpi
cki
ngsoweopt ed
tocallyou.Shewant ssomeonetocoll
ectthebaby.
”
Heswal
l
owed.“
Thebaby
?”
“
Shegav
ebi
rt
h.”
“
Uh.
.ok.Iam comi
ng,
wher
eisshe?
”

*
**

Atthemall
,Ronaparkedhi
scart
henst
eppedout
tal
kingt
oEsiovert
hephone.
“
Ishoul
djustbuyt
hat
?”
“Yes.Iwasbuy
ingt
oosoIhav
eaf
ewt
hingsatmy
house.”
“
Ok,
thanks.
”
“I
t’
sok,Iwil
lmakehi
sroom r
eady
,hewi
l
luse
Lewapi
’
sr oom.
”
“
Ok.Thanky
ousomuch.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
Hehungupwal
kinginsi
detheshops.Hestopped
st
ari
ngatt
hecontai
nersoffor
mulamilkl
ookingfor
t
heoneEsi
hadt
oldhi
mtobuy
.
“
Hey
…whatar
eyoul
ooki
ngf
or?
”
Ronat
urnedt
hensmi
l
edsur
pri
sedt
oseeCandy
.
“
UhKennygav
ebi
rt
h.Iam goi
ngt
otakemyson.
”
Candysmi
l
ed.“
Congr
atul
ati
onsDaddy
!”
“
Thanks.
”
“
Doy
ouknowwhaty
ouar
elooki
ngf
or?
”
“
Mysi
steri
n-l
awsental
i
st.
”
“
Letmeseei
t.
”
HegaveCandythel
istthenshequickl
ypicked
ev
eryt
hingandputi
nsidetheshoppingcart
.
“
Done!
”
“
Thanks.
”
“
Whoi
sgoi
ngt
ohel
pyouwi
tht
hebaby
?”
“
Mymot
hert
henIwi
l
lhi
resomeoneaf
ter
.”
“
Icanhel
pyou.
”
“
Aren’
tyouget
ti
ngmar
ri
ed?
”
“
No.Webrokeup.I
twasn’
tmeifyoumustknow.I
waswi
l
li
ngtogivei
tachancebutah.
.”
“
Iam sor
ryt
oheart
hat
.”
“I
t’
sok.Icanhel
py ouwit
hthebaby.Idon’tmind.
Youneedahelpinghand,
Iwil
lhel
py ou.That’
swhat
fr
iendsar
efor.
”
“
Whatabouty
ourj
ob?
”
“Don’
tworryaboutt
hat.Andbefor
ey out
hinkIam
tr
yingtor
eplaceKenny
, Ij
ustwanttohel
py ou.
That’
sall
.”

*
**

Tshenol
opackedherbagsf orhertr
ipandcl osedit.
Shepusheditatthecornert
henwentt othesi t
ti
ng
room whereshegrabbedafrui
tfrom t
hef r
idgeand
satdowni nf
rontoftheTVstari
ngatherr i
ng.She
foundhersel
fsmili
ngasshestaredatit.I
tfeltgreat
knowingshewassomeone’ swife.
Shet
urnedherheadt
othedoorasacardr
ovei
n,
secondsl aterKgosi walkedint akingof fhiscap.He
satbesi deherkissingher.Hesqueezedherbr east
unzippingherdr esst henpickedherupandpl aced
herdownont hefluff
ycar pettakingof fherdress.
Kgosi pull
edoutherpant i
esandt ookof fhi
st-shi
rt
thenkissedherhar derparti
ngherl egs.Tshenolo
caressedhischestashet ookouthi sdickdropping
i
tonherpussy .
Hesmackedherent
ranceandrubbedhisdi
ckonher
cl
i
t.Tshenol
omoanedsoft
lyst
aringathimthenhe
ki
ssedher.
“
Hey
…”
Tshenol
osmi
l
ed.“
Hi…”
“
Imi
ssedy
ou…”
Hepulledhercl
osersi
nki
nginherwet
ness.
Tshenolomoanedsoft
lyashefi
ll
edherupt
hen….
.
“
Fuckbabe.
.sl
owdown!
”
Nol
oignor
edhimridi
nghi
m asifther
ewasno
t
omorrow,shemoanedl
oudl
y,herbodyst
art
ed
sti
ffeni
ng.Kgosi squeezedherbut tgroaningasher
pussyclenchedsqueezi nghi m.Sheclosedhereyes
spasmsi ngwhi l
ehemov edhi swaistfr
om the
bottom spurti
nghiscum i nsideher.Shefinal
l
y
stoppedt henlookedathi m gett
ingoffhim.
Kgosil
ookedatherwi
thasmi
l
e.“
What
’swr
ongwi
th
you?”
Shelaughedget
ti
ngupandwal kedtothebat
hroom.
Shetookaquickshowerthenwalkedbacki
nthe
room wit
hatowelwrappedaroundherwetbody.
Distr
actedonhisphone,
Kgosi t
ypedthenTshenol
o
l
otionedandputonanotherdressstar
ingathi
m.
Shewal kedov
erandsnatchedhisphonetosee
whathewasdoi ng.
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngony
ourphone?
”
Kgosilookedatherasshel
ooked,
shegav
eitback
unashamed.
“
Let
’sgoandst
artcooki
ng.Iam hungr
y.”
“Soyouarenotgoi
ngt
obeembar
rassedbyy
our
acti
ons?
”
“
Whywoul
dIbe?Let
’sgoandcook.
”
Helaughedput ti
nghi
sphonedownandfoll
owedher.
Tshenolopickedherri
ngi
ngphoneonthecouch
goi
ngt othekitchent
henanswer
edhertobesist
er
i
n-l
aw’scall
.
“
Lei
na.
.”
“Hey…Iwanttogoouttoni
ght,
Iam t
ell
i
ngMar i
aand
JosephthatIam comi
ngovertoy
ourhouse.I
s
Jesusther
e?”
Tshenolol
aughedathowLeinar
efer
encedher
parent
sandbrother
.“Yes.
”
“Ei
sh…whatam Igoi
ngt
odonow?Ineedt
omov
e
out.
”
“
Aboutt
ime.
”
Shelaughed.“
Yeah,
ok,
Iwi
l
lfi
ndsomeoneel
set
o
l
eave.”
“Whatdoyoucal
lmewheny
ouar
etal
ki
ngt
oot
her
peopl
e?”
Lei
nal
aughed.“
Mysweetsi
steri
n-l
aw,
shar
p.”
“
Bye.
”
Kgosi
kissedherneck.“
Whatdi
dshewant
?”
“
Not
hing.
”
Kgosi
hoopedontheki
tchencount
ersandwat
ched
hermovear
oundcooki
ng.

*
**

Atthehospital
,Aronawal
kedinsideKenny’sroom
andfrozestari
ngatherhol
dingtheirsoninher
hands.Kennyturnedtohi
m andtear f
ull
ysmil
ed.
“
Come…”
Ronaslowl
ywal
kedinsi
dethenhelookedathi
sson
sucki
nghismot
her
’sbreast
.Tear
sfil
ledhi
seyes.
“
Ican’
tbel
i
eveImadeababy
…ist
hatr
eal
?”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Yes.Wantt
ohol
dhi
m?”
“
Idon’
twantt
ohur
thi
m.Hei
sti
ny.
”
“
Justhol
dhi
m gent
ly.
”
Kennyhandedhimthebaby.Ronaheldhi
m asi
fhe
coul
dbreakthenst
aredathisfaceandsmil
ed.
“
Shi
t!Ican’
tbel
i
evet
his.
”
“
Inamedhi
m Qui
nton.Youcanchanget
hename.
”
“
Qui
ntoni
sfi
ne.I
t’
sbeaut
if
ul.
”
Atearf
ell
ashel ookedathi
mthenhewipedi
toff.
“
FuckIcan’tbel
i
eveImadeanentir
ehumanbeing!
”
“
Youdi
d.”
Hegav
eherbackt
hebaby
.“Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?
”
“
Iam f
ine.
”
Hel ookedi
nhereyesthenl
eanedoverandkissed
her.Thesecur
it
yguardinsi
dether
oom clear
edher
thr
oat ,
Kennymovedherheadstar
ingdownather
son.
“
Yourgr
andmot
heri
snotf
eel
i
ngt
oowel
l
.”
Kennyl
ookedathi
m.“
Whathappenedt
oher
?”
“Herbl
oodpr
essur
eishi
gh.Thecasei
sst
ressi
ng
her.
”
“
Ijustwanti
tall
tobeov
er.I
fIam goi
ngt
odi
eher
e
t
hent hat
’si
t.
”
“Iwil
lbetakingQ…y ourgrandmother’
sbr
othersai
d
thati
t’
sal otont hem andt
heyweregoingtotal
kto
somer el
ativestohelpoutbutIdon’
twantmyson
rai
sedbyst rangerswhenIam ali
ve.”
“Buty
ou…”Kennypausedtaki
ngadeepbreat
h
keepi
ngi
ttoget
her.“
Will
youmanagealone?”
“
Iam goi
ngt
otal
ktomymot
hert
ohel
pme.
”
Kennybl
inkedawayhertearsandsmiled.“Ok.That’
s
ok.Hehasnoclot
hes.Youhav etobuyaf ewf orhi
m.
Wegotthisfr
om thedonati
ontrunk.
”
“
Ok.Iwi
l
lbuy
.”
“Toni
ghtyoucanaskEsi t
ohel p.Idon’
twanttogo
backwithhi
m.I t
’snotpl
easantinsidet
here.The
smellandotherthi
ngs…Idon’twantanythi
ng
happeningt
ohim. ”
Henodded.“
Ok.Shewon’
tmi
nd.Ial
readyspoket
o
her
.”
“
Youwi
l
lbef
ine.
”
“
Ihopeso.Kaypassedon.
”
Kennyf
rowned.“
What
?”
“
Sheki
l
ledher
sel
flastni
ght
.”
“
Kil
l
edher
sel
f?”
“
Yes.
”
“
How.
”
“
Shehungher
sel
f.
”
Kennylookedathimf orawhil
ethennoddedsl
owly
l
oweringhervoice.“
Don’tgotojai
l
.Ourson
deser
v esbet
terthanhavingbot
hparent
sinjai
l
.”
“
Iam goi
ngt
obehav
e.”
Shenodded.Awhilel
aterRonasignedaf
ewthings
thenKennyhandedhi
mt hebaby.Shesmil
ed.
“
Youcango.I
t’
sget
ti
ngl
ate.
”
“
Iwi
l
lbr
inghi
mtov
isi
t.
”
“
No.Don’
t.Idon’
twanthi
m seei
ngmeher
e.”
“Heisst
il
lyoungt
oknowany
thi
ngr
ightnow.Iwi
l
l
bri
nghim.”
Shenoddedgr
abbi
ngt
hesheet
str
yingt
okeepi
tin.
“
Bye…”
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
Shenodded.“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Ronat urnedandwal kedout.Kennywai t
edforhimt o
l
eav et hensheputherhandsonherf acecry
ing.The
secur i
tyguar dlookedathersadlyasKenny ’
scries
piercedt hroughherheart.Shecouldn’ti
maginewhat
i
tf eltparti
ngwi thherson.Shewalkedov erand
rubbedKenny ’sback.
“
Itwi
l
lbef
ine.
”
“
It
’spai
nful
…it
’spai
nful
..
”
Thesecur
it
yguar
dsni
ff
edr
ubbi
ngherback.

*
**

Ronagoti
nhiscarandsatont
hedr
iver
’ssi
tas
Candyst
aredathi
sboy.
“
CanI
?”
Hehandedhim over.Candylookedathi
scuteson
andsmil
ed.Hemadet inybabysoundsasCandy
smil
edevenmor efall
inginlov
eimmediatel
y.
“
Hei
ssocut
e…”
“
Yeah…”
Shesmil
edholdinghi
m pr
oper
lyi
nherar
ms.“
Letme
hel
pyou…please…”

TWOMONTHSLATER

Att
hehi
ghcour
t…
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#49

TwoMont
hsLat
er…

Atthehighcour t,peoplefil
ledthecour ttogether
withmedi ahouseswhohadbeenf oll
owi ngthecase
ri
ghtfrom thebegi nningwai t
ingtohearhowi twas
goingtoend.Ronasatbet weenhi sbrothers,all
in
blacksuitswhileEsi satbesideherhusbandi na
formaldress.Rona’ sfathersatont heothersi de
alsoli
stening.Theyl ookedatKennywhowasi na
whitedressseat edbesi deLina,herhairplait
edinto
thethi
nnestcor nrowev er.
Ontheot herside,Kay’sfamil
ysatdownsi l
entl
y
l
ookingahead, herfathermissing.Kennyt urned
backthensi ghedsadlynotseei nghergr andmother.
Li
nanot edaf ewthingsast hepr osecutorsaidhis
cl
osingar gument.Hesatdown, shestoodupi nher
whit
esui t,herhai
rti
edi ntoabun.Shest oodupi n
fr
ontoft hejudgeinherl ongheel sandsighed.
“MsLaol angcomesf rom humbl ebegi nni ngs,she
star t
edf rom t hebot tom andhashadt owor khar d
allherl i
fe.Hermot herlongdumpedherwi thher
grandmot her.Nof ather .Justherandher
grandmot her.Shedi dn’tev ent hinkshewoul dcome
toGabor one.Butshemadei t
,shemadei thereand
wor kedhar d.Shehasnohi storyofv i
olence, after
threey ear sofar el ati
onshi p,threey earsofher
thinkingshehasf oundsomeonewhol ov esherf or
her .Shecamebackt oacheat ingman, shesnapped.
Allherl i
feshehadkepti nthepai n, t
hepai nofbei ng
rej
ect ed,theabusef acedatschool ,thenamecal l
ing
byt hesoci ety .Shesnapped.Weal lcansaywhatwe
wantt osay ,butatherage…shecoul dnothav ehad
thecont rol shecoul dpossi blyhav ef i
vey earsfrom
now. ”Linat urnedandl ookedatKenny .“ Thisist he
girlwhol etemot ionscont rolher ,nott oment i
on
hor mones.Weal l knowwhatt hatdoest oaper son.I
am notaski ngt hiscour ttolethergounpuni shed,
butIam aski ngf ormer cy .Whathappenedwaswhat
Iwoul dr efert oaspassi oncr ime.I twasnot
premedat ed.Shemaybeal otoft hingsbutshei s
notabadper son.I t’
snotasecr ett hatt hiscase…i s
bei
nginf
luencedbythosewithpower
…Iconti
nueto
saymayKayr esti
npeacebuthershooti
ngwasnot
somet
hingthatwasplannedordonewithhat
e,i
t
wasdoneouthur t
,outofpai
n…shock.”
Shecont
inuedf
oral
i
ttl
ewhi
l
elongert
henf
inal
l
ysat
down.
Thejudgelist
enedtobot hparti
est hennoted
somethingdownwhi leKenny ’
shear tpounded.Her
handswer eshaki
ngonherl ap.Linal ookedather
andsmiled.Kennysmi ledback,therewas
somethingaboutLina’ssmilethatcalmedher
beati
nghear t
.
Thejudgefi
nal
lylookedatt
hem f
ixi
nghi
sgl
asses
andstart
edtal
king.
“Wehav ehadf
rom bot
hsides,
bot
hparti
eshav
e
broughtuponf
airar
gumentsandt
hiscour
thas
comet oadeci
sion.
”
Arona’
sheartpoundedsomuchashel i
stened
caref
ull
ytogetherwit
hever
yoneel
sewhilethej
udge
wentonnotr eachi
ngthemainpoi
ntsoonenough.
“
-andt
hiscour
tfi
ndsKenei
l
weLaol
anggui
l
tyof
at
tempt
edmur
der
.”
Ther
ewer egaspsf
rom thecr
owd.Li
naheldKenny
’s
handsqueezi
ngitt
henleanedov
erwhisper
ing.
“
Rel
ax…”
“
Andt her
eforesent
enceshert o8year s
i
mprisonment,wit
hthreesuspended.”Thejudge
wentontalki
ng,Kennywipedawayat eart
hathad
r
oll
eddownhercheekandl ookedatLina.
“
Don’
tworr
y,i
fyoubehave…int
hreeorfoury
ear
s
y
ouwil
lbeout,
youwon’tevenr
eachfi
ve.”
“
Myson…”
“Yoursonwillstil
lbey
oungwheny ouwalkoutof
here…y oust
il
l haveachancet ol
iveyourl
i
feaft
er
thi
s.Itcoul
dhav ebeenwor se.Don’tcr
y…”
Thej
udgefi
nall
ywalkedoutt
henev
ery
onest
oodup.
Li
nahuggedherti
ghtl
y.
“
Butwewi
l
lappeal
.Inay
earort
wo,
wewi
l
lappeal
.
Ronawalkedov
ert
henpul
l
edheri
nhi
sar
mshol
ding
hert
ight
ly.
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
It
’sok.Takecar
eofourson.
”
HeletgoasEsiappr
oachedthenshehuggedher
cr
ying.Kennyt
ookadeepbreath.
“
Don’
tfor
getmygr
andmot
herEsi
.”
“
Iwon’
t.Ipr
omi
seIwon’
t.
Theprisonguar dstookherhandthenwalkedout
withher.Kennyt ur
nedherheadwav i
ng.Awhilelat
er
theyallwal
kedout sidet
henKay ’
smotherwalked
overtowher eRona’sfat
herwascomf ort
inghisson
whilehisbrothersandfr
iendstoodnextt
ohim.
“Iknowoneofyoudidsomethi
ngt
omydaught
er.
Youmusthavethoughtki
l
li
ngherwoul
dhel
pwit
h
yourcasebut
-“
“Yourdaughterdi
edbecauseshekil
ledhersel
f,don’
t
comeher eandt r
ytobl
amemyki ds.Iwil
lslapyou
i
ntoy ourgr
av ei
fyoudon’
twalkawayr i
ghtnow.
Losewoman! ”
MmagweKaylookedatRona’
sfat
herangr
il
ythen
wal
kedaway
.
“
Don’
tmi
ndher
.”
Li
nawal
kedov
er.“
Rona…wewi
l
ltal
k.”
“
Wai
t,whatnow?Shecan’
tbei
npr
isonf
orf
ive
y
ear
s.”
“
Wewi l
lappeal
.Iwi
ll
letyouonaboutt
hat
.Iam
meet
ingacli
ent.Wewil
ltal
k.”
“
Ok.
”
Li
nawalkedtohercarinthoselongheel
sasifshe
waswearingf
lats.Shegotinhercaranddr
oveoff
whil
ePeostaredwithadmirat
ion.
“
Thi
swomanmakesmef
eel
sosmal
l
.”
Esi
sighed.“
Yeah.
.”
“
Iwant
edt
oapol
ogi
zef
orl
astt
ime.Iwasoutof
l
i
ne.
”
Esi
smi
l
ed.“
SowasI
.Iwasj
ustst
ressed.
”
“Kennywil
lbefine.Ihaveneverseenamor
e
str
ongerwomant hanher.I
fitwereme,
Iwoul
dhav
e
l
ongkill
edmy self
.”
Esi
laughed.“
Met
oo.Pr
isoni
shor
ri
ble.
”
“Sowhoisgoingt
ohelpwi
tht
hebabyoncehis
motherl
eaves?Bi
tsot
oldmeRonai
sremaini
ngwi
th
him.
”
“
Yes,
hesay
shewi
l
lgetananny
.”
“
Ok…”

*
**

Tshenol
osmi l
edstari
ngatherbeauti
fulwhit
egown.
Shecouldn’
tbeli
eveshewasgettingmarri
ed.Her
mothersmil
edf i
xi
nghervei
lwhiletheysatatthe
backofawhiteBenz.
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul…”
Nol
olookedathermothertear
ful
l
y.“
Iam sohappy
,I
wi
shKennycanjustwalkin.
”
“Kennyi
sgoingtobef i
ne.Wearenotgoi
ngtothi
nk
aboutKennytoday
,it
’syourweddi
ngdaytoday
.”
“
Doy
oust
il
lhat
eher
?
Hermot
hershookherhead.“
No.If
eel
sor
ryf
orher
.”
Tshenolosighedasthecarfinal
l
ystoppedatthe
church.Shesteppedoutofthecarwithhermother
,
oneoft hebri
desmaidsrushedovertoholdhetr
ail
.
Theyfi
xedherasshestoodbytheredcar
petthat
l
edinsi
dethechurch,
herfat
herstandi
ngbesi
deher
i
nasuit.Theyhel
dhands.
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
Tshenol
osmi
l
ed.“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Ready
?”
“
Yes.
”
Asongst artedplayingt hentheyslowlywalked
towardsthechur chdoor swhichwerebeingopened.
Every
onei nsidethechur chst
oodupandl ookedat
herasshewal kedin,onest epatat i
me.Tshenolo
smil
edst ari
ngatev er yonewhohadcomef ort
he
wedding.Herf atherhandedherov er
,Tshenolo
handedthef lowerst ohercousinthenheldKgosi’
s
handsshaking.Kgosi smi l
edstar
ingather.
“
Wow…”
Tshenol
osmi
l
edt
ear
ful
l
y.“
Hi.
.”
Theseniorpastortookthemicandstart
edwit
hthe
speechwhiletheyheldhandswait
ingtobeuni
tedas
husbandandwi fe.

*
**

Nanaosmi ledt
akingpictur
eswi thMot husiatthe
air
port.Shepostedthem onherf acebookwi t
ha
smile.Meanwhil
eMot husireadthr oughthe
facebookpostthensighedsadlyr eadingKenny ’
s
j
udgment .Hehadbeenhopi ngf orami r
acl
eto
happen.Godknewshedi dn’
tdeser vegoingtopr i
son,
notafterhowhardshehadwor ked.
Hewentt oherpr
ofil
e,t
helastt
imeshehadpost ed
waswhenshewasst i
ll
inMaun.Itwasapictureof
herstandi
nginfr
ontofhercarinabodyhugging
dresswithacapt
ionof‘Happyme’.Hesi
ghed, i
twas
funnyhoweveryt
hingwasjustovernow,
5y earswas
alongtime.
“
Babe…l
et’
sgo.
”
Hesmil
edputt
inghi
sphoneinhispockett
hen
wal
kedtowar
dsthei
rter
minalhol
dingNanao’
shand.
Minut
esl
atershegoti
nthesmal
lpl
anewi
thahuge
smil
e.
“
Ican’
tbel
i
eveIam f
lyi
ng.
”
Mot
husi
kissedher
.“Readyf
orKasane?
”
“
Yes.
”
Minuteslat
ertheplanewastaki
ngoff
.Nanaol
ooked
outthroughthewindowholdi
ngMothusi
’
shand
ti
ghtl
y.

*
***

Seletsowrotethechildr
en’
sreportswhil
et hey
playedinclass.Shelookedatthem wonder i
ngif
reall
yshewasgoi ngt obeapreschoolteacherfor
therestofherlif
e.Shepickedherphonet hen
scroll
edthroughcoursesshecouldpossiblydo.She
visi
tedaninstit
uti
on’swebsit
eandj ot
teddowna
coupleofthingsbeforeconti
nuingwit
hwhatshe
wasdoi
ngwi
thasmi
l
e.
“
Teacher
…Mosai
sbeat
ingme.
”
Shesi
ghed.“
Nobeat
ingeachot
her
!Mosa,
stopi
t.
”
Sel
etso’
sphoner
angt
henshesmi
l
edpi
cki
ng.
“
Heybabe.
.”
“
Hey
,luncht
oday
?”
Let
sosmi
l
ed.“
Yeah.
”
“
Ok,
Iwi
l
lcomel
atert
hen.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Shesmi l
edblushingt henwentonherf acebook.She
cameacr ossNanao’ spi ct
ureswi t
hMot husi
.She
swipedthroughal l
oft hem, nowshewasconv inced
amanwoul ddoi tall
fort hewomanher eall
yloved.
Shecouldt hi
nkofal lthemoneyMot husiusedt o
makewhenhewasst il
lwor ki
ngforMar kbuthehad
nevertakenheronsucht r
ips,nottoevenOkav ango
del
ta,betteryetGabor one.Hehadnev erdone
anyt
hingforhert
il
lsheactual
l
ybegged,
not
hing
wil
l
ingly
.Talkaboutmarr
yingthewr
ongguy
!

*
**

Ronawalkedinhishousewit
hhisfatherandlooked
athi
ssonlyingonthesoftbl
anketonthecarpet.
Hismotherwalkedfr
om theki
tchenholdi
nghismi l
k.
“
Howdi
ditgo?
”
Hepickedhi
sson.“Shewasfoundgui
l
tyandwas
sent
encedtofi
veyearsi
npri
son.”
Hi
smot
herhandedhi
mthemi
l
k.“
Fiv
eisal
ot.
”
“
Linasay
swewi
l
lappeal
.”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
Ronasi
ghedf
eedi
nghi
sson.
“
Iwantt
ogoandseeher
.”
“
Ok.
”
HehandedQbackt
ohi
smot
hert
henwal
kedt
othe
bedr
oom pul
l
inghi
spant
s.Hi
sfat
hersadl
ylookedat
hi
swife.
“
Hehaslostsomuchwei
ght
.Hi
spant
sar
eev
en
f
all
i
ng.
”
“Iam worr
iedaboutl
eavi
ngQ.KanaRonai saman
andhecan’ttakegoodcar
eofhi m al
one.Pleasetal
k
tohim.LetustakeQwithusti
llheisatleastayear
oldthenhewillt
akehi
m.Rightnowhei sjusttoo
young.”
“Thereisnochangi
nghi
smi nd.Hehasalr
eady
decided.Youknowhowstubbornheis.
”
Hismot
hersi
ghedandkeptqui
et.Mi
nut
esl
ater
Ronawal
kedoutt
hendroveoff
.

*
**

Atpr
ison,Nat
esmiledst
ari
ngatKennywhowas
dr
essedinherpr
isonwear.
“
Hey
…”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Hi.Whatdoy
ouwant
?”
“
Myf
li
ghtgotdel
ayed,
that
’swhyIam l
ate.
”
“
Youshoul
dnothav
ecome.
”
“Youneedall
thesuppor
tyoucanget.Fi
vey
ear
sis
nothi
ng.Youwil
lbeoutsoonenough.
”
Tear
sfi
ll
edhereyes.“
Fiv
eyeari
sal
ot.I
t’
sal
ot.My
sonwil
lbef
ive.
”
“Butyouwi
llst
il
lhavey
ourwhol
eli
fewheny
ouwal
k
outofher
e.Youwill
bewhat?27ri
ght
?”
Shenodded.
“
Don’tworry
.ThoughIcan’twaitf
ory
out
ogetoutof
t
hisplacesoIcanmarryyou.”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Youhav
est
art
ed.
”
“Thi
sti
meIam ser
ious.Iam goi
ngtoshowthatboy
howlovei
sgi
ven.Heisgoingtocrybl
ood.
”
“
Mxm.
.”
“Iam tel
l
ingyou.Youaresi
ngle.I
t’
saf
airgame.I
broughtyouacoupleofthi
ngs.”
“
Isaw.Thanks.
”
Nat
elookedatherl
i
psthenli
ckedhisownand
smi
led.“
Funnyhowyousti
ll
lookbeauti
ful
.”
“
DoI
?”
“
Yes.Yougetbet
terev
eryt
ime.
”
Shesmiled.“
Thanky
ou.Thankyouforcomi
ng.I
havebeenrecei
vi
ngyourl
ett
erst
oo.Ireadt
hem.
”
Natesmil
ed.“
Iwil
lbewait
ingfory
ouout
sidewhen
youwalkoutf
rom t
hispl
ace.
”
Kennyst
oodupl
aughi
ng.“
Bye!
”
Shewal
kedaway
.
*
**
Atprison,Ronaparkedhiscart
hensteppedout.He
fr
ownedatNat ewhowaswal ki
ngoverlooki
ngdown
onhisphone.Nat erai
sedhisheadandlookedat
hi
m unl ocki
nghiscarthengoti
nanddr oveof
f.Rona
cl
ickedhi st
onguebeforewalki
ngin.

FI
VEYEARSLATER
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#50

Fi
veYear
sLat
er…

Ronasummedupameet ingint
heboar
droom wi
th
ot
herbusi
nessmen.Theyall
noddedst
ari
ngathi
m.
“
So,
anyquest
ions?
”
“
No,
ever
ythi
ngi
sst
rai
ghtt
othepoi
nt.
”
Theot
herbusi
nessmennoddedi
nagr
eement
.
“
Ok,
Iwi
l
lwai
tfory
ourr
esponses.
”
Hewalkedoutlooki
ngatt
heti
methenwal
kedi
nhi
s
of
fi
ce.Apri
lfol
l
owedbehindhi
m.
“
Everyonesentthei
rconf
ir
mat
ionsf
orMonday
,they
wi
llbecoming.”
“
Ok.
”
Apr
ilr
anthr
oughacoupl
eofthi
ngsthroughhi
m as
hegothi
sthi
ngs.Hel
ookedatherasshecont
inued
t
alki
ng.
“
Ismydat
e’sdr
essr
eady
?”
“
Yes,
it’
siny
ourcar
.”
“
Thanks.
”
Hewalkedoutt
henshesighedwalki
ngoutofhis
of
fi
ceandsatdownkicki
ngoffhershoes.At
sil
e
wal
kedover.
“
Wher
eisRona?
”
“
Hej
ustl
eft
.”
Helookedather
.“Soy
ouar
est
il
lref
usi
ngt
ocome
wi
thme? ”
Apri
lsmil
edtur
ningtoherl
apt
op.“
Idon’
tmi
x
busi
nesswit
hpleasure.
”
“
Justbemydat
e,nott
odat
eme.
”
“Soyourbr
othercanfi
reme?Atsi
leIneedthi
sjob.I
alr
eadygotawrit
tenwarni
ngbecauseofyou.Iam
notgoi
ngtorepeatthesamemistaket
wice.”
“
Iwi
l
ldeal
wit
hRona.Ipr
omi
se.
”
“Ngngrra,
nnakeat
saba,
(Iam scar
ed,
)andIhav
ea
boyf
ri
end.”
“Boyfriendyamasepa.Iwi l
lcomeandpi ckyouup
l
ater.Iknowwher eyoustay.Gohomeandpacky our
bags, Iwil
lbetherei
nanhour .”Helookedatthe
ti
met hent ookouthisbankcar dandgaveittoher.
“Quicklypickanicedressfortomorrow,Ronaisnot
goingt ocomeback.”
Shelookedatthebankcardwit
hasmil
ethenputon
hershoes.Herphonerangasshewal
kedoutoft
he
company ’
spremises.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,wear
est
il
lgoi
ngoutt
oni
ght
?”
“
No,
Iam goi
ngwi
thAt
sil
e.”
“
Wher
e?”
“
Tohi
sbr
other
’s-
“
“
Don’ttel
lmey ouaredat
inghi
m?Apr i
lyouwi
lll
ose
yourj
ob.Didn’
tyousayhisbr
othergav
ey oua
warni
ngtheotherti
me?”
“
Iam notdat
inghi
m,Iam j
ustgoi
ngassomeone
f
rom wor
k.”
“
Yourjobi
swhat’sf
eedi
ngourf ami
ly.Whycan’
tyou
j
ustf
indadif
fer
entmantodat e?Mr.Motsamaii
s
t
hebestbossyouhaveeverhad.Pl
easedon’tr
uin
t
hat.
”
Apr
ilst
oppedat
axi
andgoti
nsi
de.
“
Ok,
bye.
”
Shehungupandsighedwonder
ingwhatki
ndofa
dressshewasgoi
ngtoget,
obvi
ousl
ysomethi
ng
el
egantandmatur
e.

*
**

Athishouse,
Ronawalkedi
nsi
det hehouseand
l
ookedatthenannywhowasalreadyreadyt
ogether
wit
hQ.
“
Daddy
!”
Ronasmiledthenbumpedf
ist
swi
thhi
m.“
Heybuddy
,
youready
? ”
“
Yes!Ar
ewedr
ivi
ngt
her
e?”
“
Yes.
”
Ronalookedatt
henanny
.“Youcanputt
hebagsi
n
thecar.
”
“
Yessi
r.
”
Hewalkedtothebedr
oom wherehetookaquick
showerandchangedi
ntoj
eansandat -
shir
t.Heput
onhiscapgrabbi
ngabott
leofwaterdi
ali
nghis
brot
her.
“
Rona…”
“
Hey
,Iam l
eav
ingGabsr
ightnow.
”
“
Atl
ast
,ar
eyoucomi
ngwi
thAt
sil
e?”
“No,
Iam l
eav i
nghim behi
nd,
hesai
dhest
il
lhadt
o
beghisgi
rl
fr
iendtocomewi t
hhi
m.”
“
Ok.Iwi
l
lseey
ouwheny
ouar
ri
ve.
”
“
Sur
e!”
Hewal kedoutl
ockingbehi
ndhimthenjumpedi
nthe
cardial
ingKenny
’snumber.Thist
ime,t
hephone
didn’
tevengothrough.Hedial
edherf
ri
end’
snumber.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hi,
letmespeakt
oKenny
.”
“
Uhshei
sbat
hing.
”
“Sheisnotbat
hing.Youknowy
ouar
ely
ing.Cany
ou
pleasegi
veherthephone.”
“
Ican’
t.
”
“
Whatt
hef
ucki
sgoi
ngont
her
e?”
“
Cal
lheronherphone.By
e.”
Shehungup,
Ronasi
gheddi
sappoi
ntedt
hencal
l
ed
Li
na.
“
Rona,
itbet
terbei
mpor
tant
.Iam busy
.”
“
WhenisKenny’
srel
easedat
e?Ical
l
edKennylast
weekandshesai
dthi
sweekbutnowit
’sFr
iday.
”
“
What
?Kennywasr
eleasedt
woweeksback.
”
Ronaf
rowned.“
Twoweeks?
”
“
Yes.Ispoketohert
hatday
.Shei
sout
.Howcome
y
oudidn’tknow?
”
“
Idon’
tknow.
”
“
Maybesheisscar
edandwant
stopul
lher
sel
f
t
oget
herbef
oreshecanf
aceyou.
”
“
That
’spr
obabl
yit
,thanks.
”
“
Shar
p.”
Hehungupandl
ookedathi
sson.
“
Q,bor
rowmey
ourphonebuddy
.”
Qhandedhisf
athert
hephonet
henhedi
aled
Kenny
’sgr
andmotherwi
thit
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Dumel
ankuku,
keAr
ona.
”
“
Ohhowar
eyoumyboy
?”
“
Iam f
iney
our
sel
f?”
“
Ifeel
bet
tert
oday
.”
“
HasKennyar
ri
vedhome?
”
“
Arr
ivedf
rom wher
e?”
“
Shewasr
eleasedf
rom pr
ison.
”
“
When?
”
“
Twoweeksback,
shei
snothome?
”
“
No.Ihav
en’
tseenherorspokent
oheri
nawhi
l
e.”
“
Oh…”
“Whenyoufi
ndher
,cal
lme.Shehastoexpl
aint
ome
whyshehasn’
tcomehome.Thi
sgirl
isful
lof
drama.
”
“
Eemma.
”
Ronast art
edthecarthendr ovewonder i
ngwher e
shecoul dbe.May beshewaswi thhermother…he
smiled.Hisgir
lwasout ,
hehadhadpl ansfort heday
shewoul dbereleasedbutseemedt heyhadt owai t
abittil
lheactuall
yfoundhisgirl.Thoughfir
sthehad
toattendthefamilygettogether.Hefoundhimsel f
smili
ng, t
hewayhi sheartwasj ustbeati
ng.Fuck, i
t
couldonlybeKennywhocoul dmakehi mfeel l
ike
that
.

*
**

Lat
ert
hatdayTshenol
owal
kedwi
thherki
dsi
nsi
de
thefastfoodr estaur
anti
nherpencilski
rtanda
whiteshirt.Shelookedatherdaught
erholdingher
l
itt
lebrother’shandastheystoodinthequeueto
ordertheirfood.
“
Hi…”
Tshenolotur
nedandl
ookedatt
hemanbehi
ndher
.
“Dumelang…”
“
Yourki
dsaresocut
et heyar
ethet
ypet
hatI
woul
dn’
tmindstepf
atheri
ng.
”
Tshenolol
aughedt
henr
aisedherhandshowi
nghi
m
hergl
itt
eri
ngri
ng.
“
Theyal
readyhav
ethei
rfat
her
.”
Hel
aughed.“
Somemenar
elucky
.”
Sheturnedbacktoherphoneasthequeuemov ed.
Minuteslat
ershewaswalkingoutholdi
ngt
hefood.
Shegotinthecarwit
hherkidspicki
ngKgosi
’scall
.
“
Heybabe…”
“
Iam home,
wher
ear
eyouguy
s?”
“
Wear
eonourway
,Iwasget
ti
ngf
ood.
”
“
Ok.
”
Tshenoloputherphonedownl
ooki
ngbehi
nd.
“Buckl
ehim upAndrea.
”
Andreabuckledherlit
tl
ebrothersi
ngi
ngforhi
mt he
songsfrom crèche.Tshenol
ostart
edhercarand
drovehome.

*
**

Bofelosatonthebedwat chingMaatl
aashe
dressed,t
earsfi
l
ledherey esthenshebl
i
nked
putti
ngherhandov erherbell
y.
“
Iwantt
omoveon.Ican’
tkeepdoi
ngt
hisany
mor
e.I
wi
ll
notbey
oursi
deforev
er.
”
Maatl
asatbesi
deher
.“Comebabe,
Iexpl
ainedt
o
youmysit
uati
on.”
“Youareself
ishMaat l
a.Youdon’
twantt
omov eon
butyouhaveawi fe.Ican’
tdothi
sanymore.I
t’
snot
fai
r.Youarehurt
ingmeunnecessari
ly
.Whatam I
supposedtodowheny ourwif
efi
ndsout?Andy ou
keepi
mpr
egnat
ingme.If
eel
sost
upi
d.”
Hekissedher
.“Il
ovey
ou,
don’
tIdoev
ery
thi
ngf
or
you?
”
“I
t’
snotenough!Ourki
dsbarel
yseey
ou.Youbar
ely
gi
vethem enoughatt
ent
ion.
”
“
Ok…aft
ert
hegett
oget
her
,wecangot
oCapeTown
l
i
keyouwant
ed.
”
Bofel
olookeddowntear
ful
l
y .“
It
’snotenough.Iwant
youwithme,youtr
eatmykidslikesi
dechicks.
”
“Iwil
ldobett
er,
Ipr
omisebuty
ou’v
egottp
underst
and.Il
oveyoubot
handIdon’
twantt
olose
eit
her.
”Herubbedherbumpki
ssi
ngher.
“
Iloveyou.Youcanplant
het
ri
ptoCapeTown.AndI
wi
llgetyouthecar
.”
Shel
ookedathi
m andsi
ghed.“
Ok.
.”
“
Don’
tcheatmeon,
Ilov
eyou.
”
Atearr
oll
eddownhercheekt
henshenodded.“
I
l
oveyoutoo.
”
Heki
ssedheronel
astt
imebef
orewal
ki
ngout
.
Bofelobur
iedherfaceont
hepil
l
owcr yi
ng.She
couldn’
tunder
standwhyhecoul
dn’
tjustchoose
whohewant ed.

*
**

Esir
elaxedwit
hhermotheri
n-l
awast heydr
ankthei
r
j
uicechatti
ngandl
aughi
ng.Esi
’sphonerangthen
shepicked.
“
Heybabe…”
“
Ist
her
esomet
hingy
oumayneed?
”
“
Kebat
labi
l
tong.
”
“
Ok,
comi
ngr
ightup!
”
“
Thanksbabe.
”
“
It
’sok,
any
thi
ngf
ormybaby
.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Shehungupwi
thasmi
l
ethenr
ubbedherbump
happi
l
y.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#51

Kennysmil
edasshefi
nishedplai
ti
ngher
grandmot
hert
hensheappliedhai
rfoodt
il
lshewas
done.
“
Ther
e…”
Hergr
andmot
hert
ookt
hemi
rr
orandl
ookedat
her
sel
f.
“
Wow!Il
ooksoy
oung.
”
Kennyl
aughedsatdownbesi
deher
.“Youdo.You
l
ookbeauti
ful
.”
Hergr
andmot
herlookedather
.“Howl
ongwil
lyou
r
emainher
ewithoutt
ell
ingany
onewher
eyouare?”
“
Tel
l
ingwho?
”
“Rona.Helovesy
ou.Idon’
tfeel
goodl
yi
ngt
ohi
m,
notafterhowhehasbeentr
eati
ngme.
”
Kennylayonhergr
andmother
’sl
ap.“Atsomepoi
nt
thatmanwasthecenterofmyworl
dmmama.I
l
ovedhi
m morethanany
thi
ng.Hewasmyl
i
feandI
al
wayst
houghtwewouldbeforev
er.
”
“
Peopl
emakemi
stakes.
”
“Peoplemakemi stakes,IknowbutIam notgoi ngto
all
owmy selftofallthatdeepev eragain.Ihave
l
earntmyl esson.Unf ort
unatel
yIlearntthehardway .
Ithrewawayf iv
ey earsofmyl if
eandal lf
orwhat?
Til
ltodayIdon’ tevenknowi fhewast ell
ingthetrut
h
thatnight .Itrytothinkaboutitandev erytimeIdoI
comeupwi thmor equest i
ons.Hepossi blymightnot
havesl eptwi thherbuthewasgoi ngtoorhedi dand
heregr etsi tbutithappened.”
“Peopl
ehaveissuesintheirr
elati
onshi
psKenny
,you
andRonaarenott hefi
rstpeopletohave
rel
ati
onshi
pproblems,suchchal l
engesar
ewhat
buil
dsyourrel
ati
onshi
p.”
“Iam notgoingtogeti
ntoarelat
ionshipwi
th
someonewhohast hepotent
ialt
ohur tmetheway
Ronahur tme,ifi
twasn’
tforhim,Iwouldhavenev
er
wenttopr i
son.”
“
Youhav
easonwi
thhi
m.Atsomepoi
nty
ouwi
l
l
hav
etosi
tandt
alkt
ohi
m.”
“
Iwi
l
l,whenIam r
eady
.”
Someoneknockedont hedoor,Kennygotupt hen
walkedt othedoorandopened.Mot husif
rowned
stari
ngatKennywhi l
eholdi
ngsomepl ast
icsf
ull
withgroceries.Heputevery
thingdownt henpulled
herinhisar mshugginghertight
ly.Kennytear
fully
huggedhi m back.Forminuteshejustheldherinhis
armst henhef inal
l
yletgoandsmi led.
“
It
’sgoi
ngt
orai
ncat
sanddogst
oday
.”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Hey
…”
“
Whendi
dyoucome?
”
“
Twoweeksback,
Iwasr
eleased.
”
Mot husi
lookedatherlonghairt
iedintoaponytai
l
thenherface.Somehowheal way simaginedshe
woul dwalkoutofpri
sonthinbutitseemedshehad
gottenevenmor esexi
erthoughshest i
ll
lookedabit
dark.Shelookedevenmor ebeautif
ul.
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
Kennyr
oll
edherey
es.“
Stopwi
tht
hel
i
es.
”
“
No.Iam bei
ngser
ious.Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Whoi
sthatf
or?
”
“Ij
usthear
dfr
om mamat
haty
ourgr
andmot
heri
s
back.
”
“
Yes,
Icol
l
ect
edherwhenIcameback.
”
“
IthoughtIcoul
dgetheraf
ewt
hings.
”
Kennyl
ookedatal
lthepl
ast
icsandsmi
l
ed.“
Thanks,
wedoneedsomef ood.
”
Sheopenedthedoorwidert
henhewal kedi
nwit
h
thepl
ast
ics.Kenny
’sgr
admot herl
ookedathi
m.
“
Mmama…”
Shesmil
ed.“Mot
hookeMot
husi
?(I
sthi
sper
son
Mothusi
?)”
Mothusi
smi
l
edt
hengr
eet
edher
.“Ehmma.Howar
e
you?”
“
Iam f
inemyson,
you?
”
“
Iam f
ine.Iboughty
ouaf
ewt
hings.
”
“
Thanky
ou,
mayGodbl
essy
ou.Kenny
,cany
ouf
ix
hi
m somet
hingt
oeat
,youcansi
tmyson.
”
Kennyl
ookedathi
m.“
Hei
sful
l
.”
Mot
husi
satdown.“
Eish,
andIwassohungr
y.”
Kennyglaredathim ashesmiledthenher ol
ledher
eyespicki
ngt hepl
asti
cs.Mothusigotupand
foll
owedwi t
ht her
estofthem tot
hekitchen.Heput
them down.
“
Youdon’
tlookl
i
key
ouar
ecomi
ngf
rom j
ail
.”
“
Ioncehear
dyouhadani
cegi
rl
fr
iend.
”
“
Whot
oldy
out
hoset
hings?
”
“
Nol
o.Wher
eisshe?
”
Mot
husi
lookedather
.“Shei
sther
e.”
Kennyputwat
eri
nanel
ect
ri
cket
tl
e.“
Iam happyf
or
you.
”
“
Whataboutyou?St
il
lwit
hthatguywhoi
sthe
r
easonyouwenttoj
ail
?”
Sheshookherhead.“
No.
”
“
Doy
oust
il
ll
ovehi
m?”
Shel
ookedathimthent
ookoutt
he100%jui
cehe
hadboughtandpour
edf
orher
sel
finagl
ass.
“
Idon’
tknow.May
be.
”
Mot
husi
nodded.“
Sowhatnow?
”
Shetookasipofherjuicethen“
Iam goi
ngtolook
forajob.Somewherefarfr
om Gabor
one.Idon’
t
wantdramaany more.Iwanttobuymysel
faplot
andstartbui
ldi
ng.
”
“
Ist
art
edacompany
.”
Kennysmi
l
edst
ari
ngathi
m.“
Wow!
”
“
Yeah…Icanf
indy
ousomet
hing.
”
“Wouldyourgi
rl
fr
iendli
kethat
?IfIwereyour
gir
lf
ri
endIwouldn’
t.Idon’
twanttorui
nyour
rel
ati
onshi
p.”
“
Youwon’
tbe.
”
“
Ok,
butonl
yaf
terIhav
ehi
trockbot
tom.
”
Mot
husishr
ugged.“
Iam goodwi
tht
hat
.Let
’sgof
or
adr
ive.
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Wher
eis-
“
“
Asf
ri
ends!
”
Shel
aughedt
henf
oll
owedhi
m out
.“Mmama,
Iam
comi
ng.”
Theywal
kedoutt
ohiscar.Kennysmi
l
edi
mpr
essed
thent
heygoti
nandhedroveoff.
“
Wher
eisy
ourRubi
con?
”
“
Att
hebackoft
hehouse.
”
“
Andy
ourchi
l
d?”
“
Wit
hhi
sfat
her
.”
Mot husi par
kedt hecaraf terawhileandt heyjust
satinhi scarcat chingup.Mot husilookedatherwi t
h
asmi l
east heexci tementheal waysf el
twhenev er
hesawherf i
ll
edhi sheart.Helookedather
wonder ingwher et heywoul dpossiblybei fhedidn’t
cheatonher .Ifonl yhehadbeenpat i
entwi thher.I
f
onlyhehadgi v enhert helov eshedeser ved.He
l
ookedi nherey eswonder ingifitwast ool ate,
deep
downshehadal way sbeentheone.Hesmi l
edas
shel aughedt hrowi ngherhandbag, herey esclosed.
“
Youar
ely
ing,
Iwasnev
erdi
rt
y.”
Mothusi
chuckl
ed.“
Youwere,
theonlyt
imey
ouwer
e
cl
eaniswhenyouweregoi
ngtoschool
.”
Shel
aughed.“
Youl
ovedmel
i
ket
hat
.”
“Don’
tli
etoyour
sel
f,Iwant
edt
owashy
ouandI
didn’
tknowhowtotell
you.
”
Shechuckl
edt
hensmil
ed.“
Iam cl
eannow.How
manykidsdoy
ouhavenow?”
“
Two.Twoboy
s.”
“
Wow!
”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Yeah…sohav
eyouseeny
ourson?
”
“Notyet
.Iam scar
ed.Whati
fher
eject
sme?He
doesn’
tknowme. ”
“Youarehismot her
,thebondy ousharewithhimis
somethingthatevendistancecan’tbreak.Youwill
alway
shav eabondwi t
hhi m becauseyouar ehi
s
mother.Goandmeethi m,hepr obablyyearnshi
s
mother’
slove.Youknowhowi tfeel
s.Youhav et
o
faceyourdemons. ”
“
Iam j
ustscar
ed.
”
“
Youhav
etof
acey
ourson,
heneedsy
ou.
”
Kennylookedathi
mthensmi
l
ed.“
Iguessy
ouar
e
ri
ght.
”
Theycont
inuedchat
ti
ng.

*
**

Sel
etsocal
l
edNanaoasshesati
nfr
ontofherTV,
a
maskonherface.
“Hey,
Ihavebeencal
l
ingMot
husi
buthi
sphonei
s
notgoingt
hough.
”
“
Eishmma,
met
oo.Iam st
art
ingt
ogetwor
ri
ed.
”
“
Wher
eishe?
”
“
Hewentt
oShakawe.
”
“Oh,Iwant
edtotellhi
mt hatIwon’
tbecomi
ngt
o
pickLef
athisweekend.”
“
Ok.Iwi
l
ltel
lhi
m.”
“
Thanks,
howi
she?
”
“
Heisfi
ne,
Itol
dhi
mtogoandr
ead,
hewasj
ust
maki
ngnoi
se.”
Sel
etsol
aughed.“
Iknow,
howi
sthey
oungone?
”
“
Hei
sfi
ne.Iwantt
ohav
eababygi
rl
.”
Selet
sosmi
l
ed.“
Ababygi
rli
sadr
eam comet
rueI
tel
lyou.
”
“KanaIal waysseeonyourstatuswithyourdaught
er,
Iam soj eal
ous.Iwantachi
ldbutMot husi i
snot
talki
ngany t
hingaboutmarr
iage.Iam gett
ing
stressedbecauseIdon’
twantt okeepgivinghi
m
kidswhenhewon’ tmar
rymet henwhent heman
whowant stomarrymecomes, hef
indsmewi thfi
ve
kids.”
“Igetwhaty oumean, honest
lyifhedoesn’tshow
potent
ialofmar ri
age,youarewastingyourtime.
Threeyearsisenoughofdat ing,f
ivei
stoomuch.
Gapey ourproblem i
sthatyouar ecohabi
ti
ng.The
momenty outreataboy f
ri
endasahusband, f
orget
him marryi
ngy ou.”
“
Youar
eri
ght
.Ishoul
djustmov
eout
.”
“
Andstar
tdoi
ngyourownt hi
ngs.IfIwer
eyouI
woul
dhavel
ongleftbecausefiveyearsi
salotand
maybehewon’
tevenmar ryyou.”
“
Don’
tsayt
hat
.”
“Iam telli
ngy ou.Youwi llstaytenyear swi t
hhim and
hewon’ tmar r
yyou.Nextt hingyoubr eakupandy ou
reali
zey ounev erdidany t
hi ngforyour self
.Put
yourselffirst
,whathav ey ouaccompl ishedever
sinceyoumethi m?I st her eafuturewi thhim?Ask
yourselfthesequest i
onsbecauseIam t el
li
ngyou,
onedaywheni t’
sallover, youwillr
eal i
zey oumadea
hugemi stake.Butanyway s,wewi l
ltalk.”
“
Ok.By
e…”
“
Bye!

*
**

Laterthateveni
ng,Esil
aybesideherhusband
breathi
ngheav i
ly
.Heki ssedherf
oreheadasshelay
ont opofhim naked.Therewasaknockout si
de.He
gotupanddr
essedupt
henopened.
“
Babe,
Ronai
sher
e,Iwi
l
lbeback.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shel
aiddownexhaustedt
henhisphonestar
ted
ri
ngi
ng.Shelookedatt
hedoorbef
orereachi
ngfori
t
andansweri
ng.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hi,
canIspeakt
oMaat
la.
”
“
Hei
snother
e,whoi
sthi
s.”
“UhcanItal
ktohi
m?I
t’
sanemer
gency
.It
’s
ser
ious.
”
“
Hei
snother
e,Icant
aket
hemessagef
ory
ou.
”
“
Tell
him Sapphi
regotbi
tt
enbyasnake.Theyhav
e
t
akenhertothehospi
tal
buti
t’
sser
ious.
”
“
Who’
sSapphi
re?
”
“
Hisdaught
er.
”
Maat
lawal
kedbackinandl
ookedatEsi
whowas
l
ooki
ngathi
m,horr
oronherface.
“
What
’swr
ong?
”
Sheslowl
yhandedhim hi
sphone.Maat
la’
shear
t
ski
ppedasshelookedatBof
elo’
snumber.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Saphhir
ehasbeenbi
tt
enbyasnakeMaat
la.Mama
saidit
’snotl
ooki
nggood.
”
Maat
lal
ookedatEsi
whowasupandj
ustst
ari
ngat
hi
m.
“
Maat
lawho’
sSapphi
re?
”
.
Rememberaf t
ery
ouread,l
ikeandcommentsot
he
nextbonuscomesqui
ckly
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#52

Maatlal
ookedatherandswallowedwonder i
ng
wherehewasgoingtostartexpl
aini
ng.Esisl
owly
satdownputt
ingherhandsonherbumpf eel
ing
weak.
“
Kekopaonehabatsher
ebue.(
Pleasesi
tdownso
wet
alk.
)Si
tdown.
”
Maatl
asl
owl
ysatdownashi
sphonest
art
edr
ingi
ng
agai
n.
“
Mphef
ounu.(
Giv
emet
hephone.
)”
Hesl
owl
yhandedhert
hephone,
Esi
picked.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Pleasel
etmespeakt
oMaat
la.
”
“Maatlawil
lcal
lyou,
resantserediscussal
enyalol
a
rona.Tanki
.(Wearesti
l
ldiscussi
ngourmar r
iage.
Thanky ou.
)”
Shedr
oppedt
hecal
landputt
hephonedown.
“
Maat
la?
”
Hel
ookeddown.“
Ma?
”
“
Pleaseexpl
aint
omewhat
’sgoi
ngon.
”
Hekeptquietblankwhil
ehishear tpoundedso
much.Atthatmomentheact ual
lywisheddeathon
himself
,hewouldratherchoosedeat hoverwhat
wasabouttohappen.Hi sli
psdriedthenhelicked
them asshelookedathim waiti
ng.
“
Arey
ougoi
ngt
otal
ktome?
”
Hekeptquiet
.Esinoddedt
akingadeepbr eat
hthen
shegavehim backhi
sphone.“Ok.Iam t
ir
ed.Iam
sl
eepi
ng.”
“
It
’snotmychi
l
d.”
Shelookedathi m.“ Ifyouarenotgoingtotel
lme
thetrut
h, l
etusj ustendithere.Don’
tmakemel ook
orfeelstupid.Icant hi
nk.Iam notachil
d.”
“Iam tel
l
ingyou.Sapphir
eisnotmybiologi
cal
daughter,j
ustachi
ldIhavebeensupporti
ng.Imet
thi
swomany ear
swhenIwentf oratri
p.Shewas
pregnantandinneed,IgavehermoneyandIhave
beendoi
ngt
hatf
orawhi
l
enow.
”
“
Maatla,
Isaidify
ouarenotgoi
ngt
otel
lmet
he
t
rut
h,don’tbot
heratal
l
.”
“
She’
snotmybi
ologi
cal
chi
l
dbabe.
”
“
DoIlookst
upid?I
fyouarej
ustsupport
ingt
hechi
l
d
t
henwhydidshesaythi
schi
ldisyour
s?”
“Idon’
tknow.May
beshefeel
ssi
nceIam theonl
y
onewhocanhelpher
,iam t
hechi
ld’
sfat
her.
”
Esi
lookedathi
mtear
ful
l
y.“
DoIl
ookst
upi
dMaat
la?
”
“
Babe.
.”
Shestoodup.“
Getout
.Kekopaot
samay
e.(
Please
go.
)”
“
Pleasel
i
stent
ome-
“
“Iam notgoingt
oli
stent
oy oumakemeaf ool
!I
don’
tev enknowwhathurt
st hemostr
ightnow…”
Tearsroll
eddownhercheeks.
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Whenwassheconcei
ved?
”
Hel
ookedather
.“Babepl
ease…”
Esi
snatchedt
hephoneandunl
ockedi
ttocal
l
Bof
elobutMaatl
atooki
tfr
om her
.
“
Icanexpl
ain.
”
“
Giv
emet
hatphone.
”
“
Wai
t.
.”
Esiangri
lysl
appedhi
m.“ Tl
i
safounu!(Bri
ngthe
phone.)Akerewenayouwon’tt
ell
thetruth,maybe
shewillt
ellmewhatIneedtohear.Youthinkyou
canmakemel ookst
upidMaatl
a?Tlisafounu!(Br
ing
thephone.)
”
Maatlapushedherbackgent lyasshetriedtaking
hi
sphonet henhesmashedi tagai
nstthewal lso
har
dt hatthescreencracked.Esir
anov erand
pi
ckedi tupthentri
edunlockingi
tbutthescr een
wouldn’tsense.Shelookedathim br
eathingheav i
l
y
wit
hanger .
“
Whatdi
dyoudot
hatf
or?
”
“
CanIexpl
ain?Let
’ssi
tdownl
i
kegr
ownups.
”
“
Grownups?Whoi
sSapphi
re?
”
“Sheisnotmydaught
er.BabeIwoul
dnev
er
disr
especty
outi
llt
hatstage.
”
“
Whoi
ssheMaat
la?
”
“
Kanayoudon’twanttoli
stent
ome,
youar
e
j
umpingi
ntoconcl
usions.
”
Esist
eppedbackwipi
ngawayhert ears.“Ook,
expl
ain…Iam wai
ti
ng.Expl
ain.Iam waiti
ngMaatl
a.
EXPLAIN!
”
Heswal lowedst ari
ngather.“ImetherwhenIwent
forat r
ipfiveyearsback.Shewaspr egnantandher
boy f
ri
endhaddumpedher .Ijust…wegotcl ose.I
sleptwithherforawhi leIwast her
et henfr
om t her
e
Ijustdecidedtot akeintheresponsi
bi l
i
tyof
fatheri
ngherdaught erbutthatwasi t
.Ihavenev er
sleptwithherfrom then.Iam justfi
nancial
l
y
supportingthebaby .”
Esil
ookedathim si
l
ent
lyt
henputonherni
ghtgown
andfl
ipsfl
ops.Shewal
kedout
.
“
Babe…”
Shewal
kedt
ohermot
heri
n-l
aw’
sbedr
oom doorand
knocked.Maat
lar
ushedaf
terherandt
ri
edpul
l
ing
herhand.
“
Babecomeon.
.don’
tdot
his.
”
“
Leav
emeal
one.Mama!
”
Maatla’
shear
tpoundeduncontr
oll
ably
.Thedoor
openedthenhi
smot herwal
kedout.Shel
ookedat
Esi
.
“
What
’swr
ong?
”
Esil
ookedather,
herli
psshakingasherf
ace
ugl
if
ied.Shest
art
edcryi
ng,hermotheri
n-l
awpul
l
ed
heri
nherarmsstari
ngatherson.
“
Kekopaot
samay
e.(
Pleasego.
)”
“
Mama-
“
“
Leav
e.”
Maatl
aslowlyt
urnedandwal
kedawayl
eavi
nghis
mothercomfor
ti
nghiswif
e.Hewal
kedoutwher
ehe
bumpedintoRona.
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Esi
knows,
bor
rowmey
ourphone.
”
Confused,Ronahandedhi
mthephonet
henMaat
la
di
aledBofelo’
snumber.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,what
’sgoi
ngon?Whatgamear
eyoupl
ayi
ng?
”
“Mydaughteri
sdyi
ngandy outhinkIam pl
ayinga
game?Iam donewithyouMaatla!Ican’
tbeli
eveyou
evenbroughtmeher
ewi t
hy ousoy oucanfuckme
merci
lessl
yfornor
eason.Ihavehadenoughof -“
“
Sapphi
rer
eal
l
ygotbi
tt
enbyasnake?
”
Bofel
o’svoi
ceshookasshespoke.“
Theyhav
etaken
hertothehospi
tal
butmamasay sshewasno
l
ongerresponsi
ve.
”
“
Iam comi
ngwi
th,
wai
t,Iam comi
ng.
”
Ronashookhi
sheadasMaat
lahungup.“
Wher
ear
e
yougoi
ng?”
“
Sapphi
regotbi
tt
enbyasnake.Ihav
etogo.
”
“
WhataboutMoesi
?Di
dn’
tyousayshef
oundout
?”
“
Mydaught
ercandi
e.”
“
Andy
oucanl
osey
ourf
ami
l
y.LetBof
elogo,
youwi
l
l
seeSapphireafter
.Ican’tbeli
eveyouar est i
l
l seeing
thi
sBof el
owomanofy oursev enafterItoldyout hat
therearechancesofherbei ngrel
atedtoKenny .
ImagineifsheisKenny’ssistert
hennowy ouar e
goingtoruinKenny’sr
elati
onshipwi thEsi.Ithought
youlovedEsi.
”
“
Ilov
ethem bot
h.”
“
Whatt
hef
uck?
”
“
Youwoul
dn’
tunder
stand.
”
“
Tryme.
”
“Il
ovethem both.Ican’
tlosemywife…Esi
ismy
every
thi
ng.Ialsocan’tl
oseBofel
o.Ilov
eher.
”
“
Youar
efuckencr
azy
!Youar
enotgoi
ngany
wher
e.”
“
Ok,thengoandtal
ktoheri
ntonotl
eav
ingt
oday
.
I
t’
slate,
shewil
lgotomor
row.”
“
Youev
enbr
oughtherher
e?Yousonofa-
“
“
Ipunchyourf
acei
fyoudi
srespectme.Saywhat
y
ouwantedtosay.
”
Ar
onal
ookedathi
m si
l
ent
lyknowi
nghewasn’
t
j
oki
ng.
“Whowast her
ewhenyoulandedKennyinjail
?Ify
ou
openyourmoutht
oinsul
tmeIwi l
ltakeoffyour
teet
h.Goandconvi
ncehertoleav
et omor
row.Shei s
atalodge.
”
Aronamumbl edbeneat
hhi
sbr
eat
h.“
Ican’
tbel
i
eve
youbroughtherher
e.”
Maat
lagavehimthenameofthel
odget
henRona
wal
kedtohiscaranddr
oveof
fwhil
eMaatl
a
wat
ched.

*
**

Kennysatinthesit
ti
ngr oom holdi
ngherphone,her
heartwasactual
lypounding.ShelookedatRona’s
numberforawhi l
ethenshookherheaddeci di
ngto
callt
hefoll
owingday.Shelookedather
grandmotherwhohadf all
enasleeponthecouch
thenshesmi l
edgett
ingup.
“
Mmama.
.getup,
letmet
akey
out
obed.
”
Shehelpedhergrandmot hertothebedr
oom thenlay
herdownandwal kedoutcl osi
ngthedoorbehindher.
Kennysatdown,shef oundher sel
fwonder
ingwher e
shewouldbeinlifehadshenotwentt ojai
l.Tears
fi
ll
edhereyesthenshet ookherphoneandcal l
ed
Nolo.
“
Hel
l
o?”
Kennyfr
ownedasamal
ev oiceanswered,
itt
ookher
asecondtor
emembert
hatNol owasnowamar ri
ed
womanandshecoul
dn’
tjustbecall
ingatanyti
me.
“
Ohhi
…Iam sor
ry,
isi
tlat
e?Shei
ssl
eepi
ng?
”
“
No,
justt
aki
ngashower
.”
“
Ok,
youcant
ell
herKennycal
l
ed.
”
“
Oh,
thej
ail
bir
d.”
Kennychuckl
ed.“
Yes.
”
“
Youareanor
igi
nal
cri
minal
,youev
enhav
eaphone
i
njai
l
?”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Nyaat
her
rawena,
Iam out
.”
“
Theny
ouj
ustgotl
essi
nter
est
ing.
”
Shechuckl
ed.“
Youmustt
hehusband.
”
“
Isther
eanot
herone?Youcant
ell
me.Iwon’
tsay
whotol
dme.”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
No,
it’
sonl
yyou.
”
“
Look,
Iwi
l
lgi
vey
ouP500i
fyout
ell
me.
”
“
Waai
,makei
tami
l
li
on.
”
“Ahh,
youaretooex
pensi
ve,
gapeIt
rustmywi
fe.O
swabil
eaker
e?”

*
**

AtNolo’
shouse,
shewalkedoutoft
hebathr
oom
thenl
ookedatKgosi
laughi
ngonherphone.
“
Ohhshei
sher
e.”
Hr
ehandedhert
hephone.“
It
’sy
ourj
ail
bir
dfr
iend.
”
Nol
oputt
hephoneonherear
.“Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
…”
“
Kenny
?”
“
Howar
eyou?
”
“
OhmyGodKenny
!Wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
Iam out
!”
“
Oht
hanky
ouJesus!
”
“
Yeah…”
“Iam sohappy.Wher
ear
eyou?Youknowyoucan
comeandst aywit
hmeforal
it
tl
ewhil
e.”
“
Iam i
nShakawe.
”
“
WhataboutQ?Hav
eyouseenhi
m?”
“
Noty
et.It
houghtIwoul
dset
tl
efi
rst
.”
“
Igeti
t.Imi
ssedy
ousomuch.
”
“
Sodi
dI.
”
Nolosl
owlysatonthebedcatchi
ngupwi
thKenny
unabl
etostophersel
ffr
om smili
ng.

*
**
Atthelodge,Bof
elowal
kedtot
hedoorwipi
ngaway
hertear
sthenopenedforMaat
la.Shef
rowned
star
ingatthestr
angeman.
“
Uhh…”
“
Hi,
Iam Ar
ona.Maat
la’
sbr
other
.”
Bofelotookadeepbr eathst
ari
ngathimthenlethi
m
i
n.Hewasdef ini
tel
ythebrot
her,t
hetal
l
nessspoke
fori
t sel
f,t
hebodythoughMaat l
awasabi tmore
buffer,t
heirf
aces…lips…ohyes,hewasindeedthe
brot
her .
“
Hesentmeher
etot
ryt
alki
ngt
oyou.
”
“
Ihavenot
hingt
osay.Ihav
esai
dal
lIcansay
.Ifhe
i
snotcomingwi
tht
henIam goi
ngal
one.
”
“
Andwher
ear
eyouget
ti
ngt
ranspor
tatt
hist
imeof
t
heni
ght
?”
“Iwi
llmakeapl an.Mydaught
erneedsme.I
can’
t…”Shetr
iedwalki
ngoutbutRonacl
osedthe
doorlocki
ngit.
“Youarenotgoi
nganywher
ethi
slat
e,any
thingcan
happentoyou.Li
stent
omeBofelo,
yougoingor
stayi
ngtonightwon’tchangethesit
uati
on.Youhav
e
tohavefai
tht hatSapphir
ewillbefi
ne.Youcan’
t
panicli
kethis.Iknowit’
shardbutthi
nkofyour
safet
y.Youwi lll
eavetomorr
ow. ”
“
Ishoul
dn’
thav
ecomeher
e.”
Sheputherhandsonherfacecr
ying.“
Ifany
thi
ng
happenst
omydaught erI
..
”
“
Not
hingwi
l
lhappent
oher
.Rel
ax.
”
Shebrokedowncry
ing.Ronasadl
ylookedather
thenhuggedher
.
“
Shei
sgoi
ngt
obef
ine.
”
“
Iam scar
ed.
”
“
Justr
elax.I
twi
l
lbef
ine.
”
Minut
eslaterBofel
osteppedbackfeel
i
ngemoti
onal
t
henshel ookedathisl
ips.Shest
oodonhert
oes
t
henkissedhim.
.
Li
keandcommentassoonasyour
eadsowecan
squeezei
nanot
herbonusf
ami
l
y
.
Dir
tyConf
essi
ons
#53

Aronast
eppedback.Embarr
assed,
Bofel
oputher
handoverherl
ips.Shet
ookastepbackr
eal
izi
ng
whatshehadjustdone.
“
Iam sor
ry.
.ohmyGod…Godwhat
’swr
ongwi
th
me?
”
Ronarubbedhi
sli
psst
ari
ngathert
hensi
ghed.
“Maat
laismybrot
her
.”
“
Ofcause,Iunderst
andt hat.Iam sosorry
.Ididn’
t
meanto.Idon’
tknow…”Sheputherhandsonher
f
aceembar r
assed.“Ican’tbeli
eveIjustdi
dthat.
”
“It
’sok,justhopeyouunderst
andthatweare
brothers.Hesentmet oconvi
nceyoutogo
tomor r
owi nsteadoft
oni
ght.It
’sl
ate,
anyt
hingcan
happent oy ou.”
Bofel
onoddedthenRonat
urnedt
owal
koutbut
st
oppedatthedoor.
“
Wher
eisy
ourf
ather
?”
“
Lat
e…”
“
Doy
ouhav
esi
bli
ngs?
”
“
Yes,
myol
derbr
other
.”
“
It
’sonl
yyouandhi
m?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Doy
ouhav
eanysi
bli
ngsoutt
her
e?”
Bof
elol
ookedathi
m conf
used.“
No.
”
“
What
’sy
ourf
ather
’sf
ull
name?
”
“
Kennet
hPhal
adi
.”
Ronawalkedout
.Bof
eloputherhandsonherf
ace
embar
rassed.
“
Godwhatdi
dIdo?
”
Sheworri
edl
ystaredatherphonewonderi
ngifshe
hadtotel
lhi
mf i
rst,shewassuret
hiswouldmake
hi
m choosehiswife.Tear
sfi
ll
edhereyes.
“
Bof
elowhatdi
dyoudo?
”
Shet
ookherphonet
hentri
edcall
i
nghim butt
he
numberwoul
dn’
tgothr
ough.Shecal
l
edthenumber
hehadcal
l
edwi
th.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Hi
…Iam sosorryAr
ona.Idon’
tknowwhyIdi
dthat
.
Idon’
tdothat
.”
“
It
’sok.
”
“
IfMaat
laf
indsouthei
sgoi
ngt
oleav
eme.
”
“Iwon’
ttel
lhimifyoujustbehave.Whaty oudid
showedmesomet hi
ngabouty ou.Idon’twantto
thi
nkmuchi nt
oitbutifyoucan’trespectmybrother
thenwalkaway.”
Hehungup.Bof
elolookedatt
hephonef
orawhi
l
e
t
hensighedwi
thregret
.

*
**

Mot
husigoti
nhiscart
hefol
lowi
ngmorningtal
king
t
ohisbr
othert
henwavedathismot
herrever
sing.
“
Sowhatnow?
”
“
Idon’
tknow.
”
“Nanaoisagoodwoman, youshouldsti
ckwithher.
WithKennyatthemomenty ouwouldneverknow.
Whatifshegoesbacktoherboy f
ri
end?Thereare
chancesthatshecangoback.”
“
Noti
fIwi
nherbackf
ir
st.
”
“
Lai
takawari
ska,
ify
oudon’
tgether
,youar
egoi
ng
t
oloseagoodwomanandal
ltowhat?”
Mothusi
ashestoppedthecari
nfrontofKenny
’s
yar
dandwatchedherassherakedtheyard.
“If
ail
edtochooseherthel
astt
ime,
Iwantt
ochoose
herthi
sti
mear ound.
”
“
IgetyoubutIwasj usttell
i
ngyoutherearechances
t
hatKennywon’tfeelthesamewayorshemayf eel
t
hesamef ornowt henlatergobacktothesame
manwhohur ther
.”
“
Idoubt
.”
“
Ok.No,
wewi
l
ltal
k.”
“
Shar
p.”
Kennyl
ookedathim ashewal
kedov erthenshe
pi
ckeduptheli
tt
erandthrewi
tinthebin.Shesmil
ed
st
ari
ngatherdustyf
eetashewalkedov er.
“
Hi…”
Hesmi
l
ed.“Iam goi
ngtoGaborone.Gi
vemey our
CVsot
hatIcanalsohel
pyoulookforajob.
”
“Ok.
”Shet ur
nedandwalkedinsi
dethehouse.She
camebackmi nut
esl
aterwi
thcleanfeetandhanded
him herCV.
“
Thanks.
”
“
It
’sok.Iwi
l
ltr
yfi
ndi
ngsomet
hingf
ory
ou.
”
“
Thankyou,Iwil
lal
sot
rysendi
ngmyappl
i
cat
ion
t
hroughemail
.”
“
Iwi
l
ltr
ansf
erai
rt
imet
oyou.
”
Kennysmil
ed.“
Thanky
ou.Whoknewy
oucoul
dbea
goodfr
iendtome?”
Mot
husil
aughed.“
Ihav
eal
way
sbeenagoodf
ri
end
t
oyou.
”
“
Letmewal
kyout
oyourcar
.”
Theysl
owl
ywal
kedt
ohi
scar
.
“
Thanky
ou,
somuch.Yest
erdaywasf
un.
”
Mothusismil
ed.“
Itwas,
Idi
dn’
tknowyousti
ll
hadit
i
ny ou.Whenareyougoi
ngtoGabor
onetoseeyour
son?”
Kennysi
ghed.“
Idon’
tknow,
Ithi
nkmay
beIshoul
d-“
“
Youwon’tdoanyt
hingi
fyoukeept hinki
ngofwhat
y
oushoul
ddo.Youshouldjustdoit.Ireal
lyt
hink
y
ouarebeingunf
airony
ourchild.
”
Shel
ookedathi
m.“
Iwi
l
lcal
lAr
onat
oday
.”
“
That
’smor
eli
kei
t.Iwi
l
lcal
lyoul
atert
oconf
ir
m.”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Bye!
”
Hebrief
lyhuggedhert
hengoti
nhiscarasshe
stoodby.Heroll
eddownthewi
ndowandhanded
herachocolat
e.
“
Igoti
tfory
ou.
”
Shesmi
l
edt
aki
ngi
tthenhedr
oveaway
.
*
**”
I
nsideherhouse,
Kennyslowl
yat
ethechocol
ate
thought
ful
l
ythenshewalkedt
ohergrandmot
her’
s
bedroom.
“
Mmama…”
Shesatont
hebedwaki
ngherup.“
Mmama…”
Hergr andmotherslowlywokeupandl ookedather,
confusioninherey es.Kennysi ghedsadlythen
start
edgoingt hroughaf ewt hi
ngswi t
hhert ryi
ngto
refr
eshhermi nd.Awhi l
elater,shewalkedoutofthe
bedroom andwentt oherr oom holdi
ngherphone.
Shesatdownl ookingatAr ona’snumberwhi leher
heartpounded, shetappedi tcall
inghi
mt hen
swallowedast hephoner ang.
“
Hel
l
o?”
Kennyfr
ownedatt
hesmal
lvoi
ce.“
Uhhi
,whoi
s
thi
s?”
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hel
l
o,cany
ouhearme?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
What
’sy
ourname?
”
“
Q…”
Kennytear
ful
lysmil
edthensheputherhandov
er
hermouthtry
ingtokeepiti
n.Shet
ookadeep
breat
h.“Q?
”
“
Yes.Thi
sisdaddy
’sphone,
Ican’
tseehi
m.”
“
Ok…ar
eyouathome?
”
“
No,
wewentt
oGr
anny
’shouse.
”
“
Ok…whoar
eyouwi
th?
”
“
AuntAmber
.”
“
Hel
l
o?”
Kennypausedl
i
steni
ngt
othef
emal
evoi
ce.“
Hi.
Who’sthi
s?”
“Amber .Ronai
snother
eatthemoment.Coul
dyou
call
aftertwoaf
tert
womi nut
essoIcanhandhi
m
hisphone.”
“
Noi
t’
sok,
letmespeakt
oQui
nton.
”
“
Iam sor
rybutIcan’
tdot
hat
,Ihav
etogi
veAr
o-“
“Amberletmespeakt
omyson.Youwil
lgoandl ook
forRonawhil
eIspeaktomyson.Gi
vehim backthe
phone.”
Amberhungup, ofcausehehadt ohaveagir
lf
riend.
Shehadexpectedit,
mat teroffact
, i
tdi
dn’
tsurpri
se
her.Air
ti
mereport
edt henshesmi ledandqui
ckly
thankedMot
husi t
hroughat extmessage.

*
**

Amberwal kedovertoherbossthenwhowasbusy
withot
hermen.Het urnedtoherassheapproached
thenwalkedoverinhisworksui
t.Helookedather.
“
What
’swr
ong?
”
“Yourphone.I
twaswi
thQ.Someonecal
l
ed.She
saidsheisQ’smot
her
.”
Hef
rowned.“
Q’swho?
”
“
Mot
her
.”
“
Didshesayhername?
”
“
No.
”
Ronawipedhishandsont hewor
ksui
tthent
ookhi
s
phone.Helookedatthenumbert
hencall
edi
tas
Amberwalkedaway .
“
Hel
l
o?”
Hi
shear
tski
pped.“
Babe?
”
“
Hi…”
“Hey…wherearey
ou?Ihear
dyougotr
eleased.Why
didn’
tyout
ell
me?”
“
Iam wi
thmygr
andmot
her
.”
“ButIcal
l
edher
…”Hesi
ghed.“
Itdoesn’
tmat
ter
.How
areyou?Imi
ssyou?
”
“
Ijustwant
edt
oaskaboutQ.
”
“
Icanbr
inghi
mther
e.”
“
No.Iwi
l
lcome.
”
“
Ok,
when?Iam dy
ingt
oseey
ou.
”
“
AssoonasIgetaf
ewt
hingsi
nor
der
.”
“
Whatt
hings?Youj
ustgotoutofpr
ison,
youhav
e
not
hing.
”
“
Osi
mol
otseaker
e?(
Youhav
est
art
ed.
)”
Hesmi led.“Sorr
y…Iam just…koorebabeIhave
i
magi nedt hedayy ouwalkoutofpri
sonforf
ive
year
s, t
hisi snothowIsawi t
.Quint
onhasbeen
wait
ingf ory out
oo.Pleasedon’
tdothist
ous.We
wil
ltakei tonedayatat i
me.”
“Ij
ustneedsomet
imet
oemot
ional
l
ygetr
eadyf
or
him.Please…”
“Ok.CanIcomeandseey
out
hen?Qwi
l
lremai
n
behind.
”
“Bat
hongRona,
can’
tyoujustwaitf
ormet
her
e?
Gapeyouhaveagi
rl
fr
iendakere?
”
“
Whatgi
rl
fr
iend?
”
“
Theonewhoanswer
edy
ourphone.
”
“Shei
st henanny
.Iam notsl
eepi
ngwi
thany
one.
CanIpleasecomeandseey ou?”
“
Nyaar
ra,
justst
ayt
her
e.”
“
Iam comi
ng.Iwi
l
ldr
ive.
”
“
Bat
hongRona!
”
“Il
oveyou,Ican’
twai
tanymore.Iam dr
ivi
ngt
o
Shakawe.Iwantustofi
xthi
ngs.”
Kennychuckl
ed.“Heela,Idon’
twantt
of i
xany
thi
ng
wit
hyou.Thereisnothingtofi
x.Il
ongtol
dyouto
moveon.”
“
Iam comi
ngt
her
e,y
ouwi
l
ltel
lthatt
omyf
ace.
”
“
Ronacanyouj
ustst
ayt
her
e,aker
eIsai
dIam goi
ng
t
ocome.”
“Iam comi
ngt
oday
.Doy
ouwantmet
ogety
ou
anyt
hing?”
“
Idon’
twantany
thi
ng.
”
“Ok,
Iwi
l
ljustbuy
.Il
ovey
ou,
Iam comi
ng.Il
ovey
ou
ok?”
“
Ij
o!”
“
Keagor
ataKenny
.”
“
Bye…”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Iknowy
oul
ovemet
oo.
”
“
Stopl
yi
ngt
oyour
sel
f.Thatshi
plongsank.
”
“
Omaaka.Keet
la.
”
“Idon’
tknowwhatyouarecomi
ngf
ormmey
ouar
e
goingtobedi
sappoi
nted.
”
“
Iam goi
ngt
otakeashower
.It
hinkIshoul
dfl
y.
”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Bye…”
“
Iloveyou.Shi
t!Iam soexci
ted.Keet
la.Doyou
t
hinkweshouldhavesecondbaby ?KanababeQis
l
onely.
”
Shelaughedagai
nashewalkedinsi
det
hehouse
smil
ing.“Youar
ecrazy
.Webrokeup,wear
enot
havi
ngasecondbabybecauseyouandIbr
okeup.”
“
Iam y
ourboy
fri
endandkej
olal
ewena.
”
“
Bat
hongt
hisman!Iam notdat
ingy
ou.
”
“Idon’tcar
e,youaremygir
lf
ri
end.Whatyouare
sayingisnonofmybusiness,al
lIknowi
sthatyou
aremygi rl
fr
iend.
”
“
ByeRona!
”
“
Youdi
dn’
tsayIl
ovey
out
oo.
”
“
BecauseIdon’
t.
”
“
Any
who,
Ilov
eyou.
”
Kennyl
aughedthenhungup.Aronafreshenedup
thenwal
kedoutminutesl
aterr
unningintohisf
ather
.
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“
Iam goi
ngt
oShakawe.
”
“
Todowhat
?”
“
ToseemmagweQ.
”
“
Uhu,
shei
sout
?”
“
Yes.Iwantt
oseeher
.”
“
Ok,
arey
ougoi
ngwi
thQ?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Ok,that
’sgood.Hopefull
ythi
stimearoundyou
managetogivehertherespectsheneeds.
”
“
Eer
ra.
”
“Thenmarryher.Youaregett
ingtoool
d.Soon
enoughevenAtsilewil
lbegett
ingmarr
ied.He
broughtareal
l
yni cegi
rl
.”
“
Idi
dn’
tseeher
.”
“
Shei
sout
side.
”
“
Ok,
yout
ell
mamaIl
eft
.”
“
Wher
eisy
ourol
derbr
other
?”
“
Hei
sar
ound.
”
Hequickl
ywalkedoutt
oavoi
dmorequest
ionst
hen
f
rownedstar
ingatApri
l
.At
sil
ewal
kedovertohi
m.
“Icanexplai
n.Iam notsl
eepi
ngwi
thher
,Ij
ust
broughther-
“
“Wewi l
ltalkatwork.Youknowtherul
es,
youdon’
t
fuckempl oyees.Iwi
llseebot
hofyouatwor
k.Iam
going,
Kennyi sout.”
Hewal kedpastApr
ilwhowasj
ustl
ooki
ngathim
thenwentovertowhereQwasplay
ingwi
thother
kids.
“
Q,l
et’
sgo.
”
“
ButIam st
il
lpl
ayi
ng.
”
Ronawal
kedov
erandsmi
led.“
RememberwhenI
sai
dmamawouldcomebackfr
om hert
ri
p?”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Yes,
issheback?
”
“Yes,
nowwehavet
ogoandseeher
.Youwantt
o
seemamari
ght?
”
“
Yes!
”
“
Ok,
let
’sgot
hen.
”
Hel
ookedov
eratAmber
.
“
Takey
ourt
hings,
wear
egoi
ng.
”

*
**

Maatl
awalkedi
nsi
deBofel
o’sr
oom,
Bof
eloqui
ckl
y
gotup,
herhear
tpoundi
ng.
“
Ronat
oldmey
ou-
“
“
Heki
ssedme!
”
Maat
laf
rowned.“
What
?”
“
Hekissedme.Hewant
edme,
what
everhet
oldy
ou
wasali
e.Heki
ssedme.
”
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#54

“
Ronadi
dwhat
?”
“
Heki
ssedme.
”
“
Why
?”
“
Becausehewant
edme.
”
“Ronawoul dnev erkissyouorev enthinkaboutit
becauseheknowsIl ovey ou.Whenitcomest oour
brotherhood, Ronai sloyal,hewouldneverbetr
ayme
l
iket hat.I
fthisisy outryingtolookforatt
enti
on
becauseIcoul dn’tcomey est
erday,
youaregoing
toofarandy ouar egoingt omakemequest i
onal ot
ofthings.”
Bof
elol
ookedathi
mtear
ful
l
y.“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“Whatdi
dweagr eeon?Si
ncewhendoyoucal
lme
atati
mey ouknowIam wit
hmywifeBofel
o?”
“
Iwasscar
ed.
”
“
Nomat
terhowscar
edy
oucanbe,
youcannev
er
cal
lmewhenIam wit
hmywi f
e.Whati
fshechooses
tosueandhumi
l
iat
ebothofus?”
Tear
srol
l
eddownBofel
o’scheeks.“
Ourdaught
er
coul
dhavedi
edMaat
la.
”
“
Isshedead?
”
“
Iwasscar
ed,
can’
tyouunder
stand?
”
“
WhatIdon’
tunder
standi
swhyyoudecidedt
ocal
l
mewhenyouknewIwaswi t
hmywife.
”
Bofel
olookedathi
m andst
eppedbacksi
l
ent
ly
cr
ying.
“Andfory out otellherthatSapphireismychi l
d?
Whatwast hatf or?Youcoul dhavesai danything
otherthant hat.Iam reall
yconv i
ncedy ouaret ryi
ng
tobreakmymar ri
ageandSapphi re’
sincidentjust
workedi ny ourfavor.Youcoul dhavesaidsomet hi
ng
elsetogetMoesi t
ogi v
emet hephonebuty ou
deli
beratelytoldherSapphi r
ewasmydaught er.
”
Shenodded.“
Getout
!”
“
Osekawant haor
egetout
,ket
lagocl
apaBof
elo,
want
lwael
a.”
“
Leav
eMaat
la,
got
oyourst
upi
dwi
feand-
“
Maatl
aslappedheracr
ossthefacet
hatshesaw
st
arsasshef el
lont
hebed.“Whatdi
dyoucallmy
wi
fe?”
“
Leav
e-“
Hepul
ledherupwi
thherhai
randsl
appedheragai
n.
“
Wareng?”
Bofel
olookedathi
m andspatonhisface.Maatl
a
sl
appedheragainevenhar
derthatherearbl
ocked.
“
Didy
ouj
ustspi
tonme?
”
Shelookedathi
m andst
art
edcry
ing.Maat
la
sl
appedheragai
nasshetri
edtohideherf
ace.
“
Ont
lwaet
swakengBof
elo?
”Hesl
appedheragai
n.
Sheputherhandsonherf
ace.“
Youar
ehur
ti
ngme.
”
“Nt
shadi
lot
seo,
ntebe.(
Takeoft
hoset
hings,
look
atme.
)”
“
Youwantt
obeat
-“
“Takeyourhandsof
fyourf
acebef
oreIst
epony
our
neck.
”
Shesl
owl
ytookt
hem of
f.“
Whatdi
dyoucal
lmy
wif
e?”
“
Not
h-“
Hedoubl
esl
appedhert
hatbothherearsbl
ocked.
Bof
elohi
dherf
aceonhischestcr
ying.
“
Watlhodi
a.Obatlamangagoutl
we?(
Youar
e
maki
ngnoise.Youwantt
obehear
dbywhom?)”
“
Ngng…”
Shepr
essedherl
i
pst
ryi
ngt
ost
opcr
ying.
“
Leav
eme,
stepback.Iwantt
otal
ktoy
ou.
”
Hi
svoicesoundedsodi
stantt
houghshecoul
dhear
hi
m.“Youwanttobeatme.”
“
Stepback.Iam notgoi
ngt
obeaty
ou.
”
“
Iam sor
ry.Iam sor
ry.
”
“
StepbackBof
elo.
”
Sheslowlysteppedback,herhandsonherface
shiel
dingherface.Maat
latookoffherhandsoffher
faceandlookedather.
“
Whydi
dyout
ell
Esi
thatSaphhi
rei
smi
ne?
”
“
Tlher
rawenasor
ry,
youar
ehur
ti
ngme.
”
“
Isyouri
ntent
iontorui
nmymar
ri
agebecauseI
won’
tchoosey ou?
”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“Iam nev
ergoi
ngt
oleav
emywi
fef
ory
ou,
doy
ou
hearme?”
Shenodded, herhandsonhercheeks.“
Iunderst
and.
Iwon’tbotheryouanymore.Youwil
lneverseemy
faceagain.
”
“Noonei sgoi ngany where.Noonei sleaving.You
aregoingt omakepeacewi ththef actt hatEsiis
yoursisterinthis.Youar ethey oungoneandy ou
will
respecther .Youar emi ne,Ilovey ouwi thallmy
heart,
Ilov eourkids.Ialsol oveEsi andmyki dswi t
h
her,whaty oudidy ester
daywi l
lneverhappenev er
againandy ouwi l
lneveraskmewhenIam l eaving
herbecauseshei snotgoi ngany wher e.Esi i
sy our
sist
erwif e,l
earntolivewi t
hi t
.Am Icl ear?”
Bof
eloqui
ckl
ynodded.
“Good,i
fIcat
chy oucheati
ng,
youwil
lregretit
.
That’
sapromise.Nowwi peawayt
hoset ears.
”
Bof
elowipedawayhert
ear
sthenl
ookedathi
m
i
nnocent
ly.
“
Dowehav
eanunder
standi
ng?
”
Shequi
ckl
ynodded.“
Yes.
”
Maatl
alookedatherswol
lenfacethenl
eanedov
er
andki
ssedherunzippi
nghispants.
“
Babe,
don’
tyout
hinkMoesi
wil
lnot
icet
hat
-“
“Moesi i
smyprobl
em, notyour
s.YouandIwi l
lnev
er
discussMoesinei
therwil
lyoueversayhername.
Youmi ndthebusi
nessweshar eonly
.”
“
Ok.Iam sor
ry.
”
Hel ai
dheront hebedtakingof fherdr
esst hen
kissedherneckgoingdownt ohersensiti
vebr east
thenherbumpbef oreproceedingt oburr
yhi sface
betweenherlegsmuf fi
ngher .Tearsfi
ll
edBof elo’
s
eyesasshemoanedsof tl
y .Herlegsbegun
stif
feni
ng,shegotclosert
henMaat lagotup
stroki
nghisdickand…
.

*
**

Apri
lsati
nAt si
l
e’scarholdi
ngherphoneasthei
r
yar
dgotfil
ledwithrel
ati
ves.Hewalkedoverhol
ding
aplat
ethengotinhandingherthefood.
“
Eat
..
”
“
Iam nothungr
y.”
“
Cany
oudr
opt
hisnow?
”
“
Atsi
l
eImayl
osemyj
ob.
”
“Youarenotgoi
ngt
oloseyourj
ob.Iam her
eai
n’
tI?
Iwil
ldealwi
thmybrot
her.
”
“
Im scar
ed,
myf
ami
l
ydependsont
hisj
ob.
”
“Youar
enotgoi
ngt
olosey
ourj
ob,
cal
m downand
eat.
”
Apri
ltookt
hef
oodt
hensi
ghed.“
Whenar
ewegoi
ng
back?”
“
Wheni
t’
sov
er.
”
“
Ineedt
obehomebyt
oni
ght
.”
“Ify
out ol
dt hem youarecomingbacktoday,
cal
l
them andt el
lthem t
hereisachangeofplans
becausey ouar enotgoi
nganywhere.
”
“
Atsi
l
eyou-
“
“
Letmegoandgety
ousomej
uice.
”
Hesteppedout ,April
lookedathimtearf
ull
ythen
l
ookedatt hefoodf oramoment ,shehadn’
teaten
thewholedayandherst omachwasal r
eady
complai
ning.Shet ooktheforkandstar
tedeati
ng
thet
astyfood.

*
**

Atdusk,Esi
tri
edMaatla’
snumberagainthensi
ghed
tear
ful
lyasi
trangunanswered.Shecal
l
edRona.
“
Hel
l
o?”
Shesni
ff
ed.“
Hey
…tl
her
rawenaIam t
ryi
ngt
ocal
l
yourbr
otherbutheisnotpi
cki
ng.Cany
oubel
iev
ehe
hasbeengonet hewhol
eday?Wherear
eyou?
”
“
Iam dr
ivi
ngt
oShakawe.
”
“
Youar
edr
ivi
ngt
oShakawe?Fr
om her
e?”
“
Nah,
IwentbackhometodropoffAmbert henf
lew
t
oMaun.Iam wi
thQ.Igotarent
alcarr
ightnow.
”
“
Whatar
eyougoi
ngt
odoi
nShakawe?
”
“
Iam goi
ngt
oseeKenny
.”
“
Kenny
?”
“
Yes,
shewasr
eleased.
”
“
Andshedi
dn’
tthi
nkt
otel
lme?
”
“
Shedi
dn’
ttel
lany
one.
”
Esi
slowl
ynodded.“
Whoi
sSapphi
re?
”
“
Huh?
”
Tear
sroll
eddownhercheeks.“
Ronapl
ease…Iknow
youknow.”
“
Youshoul
daskhi
m.”
“
Hewon’
ttel
lmet
het
rut
h.Pl
easet
ell
met
het
rut
h.”
“
Iam sor
rybutIdon’
tknowany
thi
ng.
”
Shestart
edcr
ying.“
Ronaplease…youknowital
l
.Is
ther
esomeoneelseoutther
e?Ideserv
etoknow.I
can’
tlosemyhusband.
”
“Maat
lal
ovesy
ou.Hei
snotgoi
ngany
wher
e.I
promi
se.
”
“Whycan’
tyoujustt
ell
me?Pleaset
ell
me…i she
seei
ngthi
sBofelowoman?I
sthathi
sgirl
fr
iend?”
“
Youshoul
daskhi
mthosequest
ions.
”
Shedroppedthecall
andsatdowncr ying.I
tfel
tasi
f
Maatlawassli
cingherheartwi
thaknifeoverand
overagai
n.Shetri
edcall
inghim agai
n,thi
sti
mehe
pi
cked.
“
Iam comi
ng.
”
“
Wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
Mycarhadabr
eakdown.
”
“
Youar
ely
ing!
”
“
Wewi
l
ltal
kwhenIgett
her
e.”
Hehungupasshest
art
edt
osaysomet
hing,
Esi
l
ookedatherphoneast
ear
sr ol
l
eddown.Her
motheri
n-l
awwalkedi
nandlookedather
.
“Esi,stopdoingthi
stoyoursel
f.Youar egoingto
l
oset hebabyisyoukeepstressi
ngy our
selfli
kethi
s.
Isaidl eav
eittous,hi
suncleswill
talktohim.Stop
stressingthebaby.Youshouldeat,si
tdown. ”
“
Idon’
twantt
oeat
.Maat
lai
sbr
eaki
ngmyhear
t.
”
Hermotheri
nlawputt
hepl
ateoff
ooddownt
hen
huggedher
.
“Baby,
Ineedyoutof
ocusonthebaby
,ify
oukeep
cryi
ngli
kethi
syouwil
ll
oseher.
”
“
Hekeepsl
yi
ngt
ome.
”
Thebedroom dooropenedt
henhewal
kedi
n.Hi
s
motherglar
ed.
“
Wher
ewer
eyout
hewhol
eday
?”
“
Mycarhadabr
eakdown.
”
“
Breakdownwher
eandwher
ewer
eyougoi
ng?
”
Hesi
ghed.“
CanIt
alkt
omywi
fe?
”
Hi
smot
hershookherheadwal
ki
ngoutt
henMaat
la
l
ookedatEsi
.
“
Whyar
eyoucr
ying?
”
“
Wher
ear
eyoucomi
ngf
rom?
”
“
Didn’
tIj
ustexpl
ainmy
sel
f?”
“
Maat
ladoy
ouhav
eachi
l
doutt
her
e?”
“Areweev ergoingtomoveonfrom thi
s?Itol
dyou,I
don’t
.BabeImessedup, Ishoul
dhav etol
dyou.But
that’
sal
l.Idon’thav
eachildoutther
e.”
“
Youar
ely
ing.
”
“Thi
sconver
sat
ioni
sbori
ng.Maybethisi
swhyis
spentt
hewholedayout
,toav
oidthi
s.”Hest
art
edto
walkout.
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?Iam t
alki
ngt
oyou.
”
“Outsi
de.Youaresuffocat
ingme.”Heputthecar
keysdownandwal kedout.Esipi
ckedt
hekey sthen
walkedoutwithherhandbaggoingtot
heircar.She
star
tedtheenginethenrever
sedanddroveoffint
o
thedarkness.
*
**

Kennylayont hecouchwat chi

ngamov ieonTV.She
l
aughedataf unsceneshaki ngherheadthensighed
ast hemaincharact
erkissedsomeone.The
romanticmov i
ewenton, shefrownedstar
ingather
phonering.Shereachedforitandansweredwitha
sigh.
“Bat
hongRona,
didn’
tyoujustcal
lmi
nut
esback.I
am t
ryi
ngtowatchamov i
e.”
“
Iam dr
ivi
ngov
er,
isy
ourgr
andmot
herawake?
”
“No,sheissleepi
ng.Ican’
tbel
i
evey
ouar
ecomi
ng
evenafterIt
oldyounotto.”
“
Iwi
l
lbet
her
einf
ivemi
nut
es.
”
Kennydr oppedthecallandcontinuedwithhermovie.
Carl i
ghtsshonethroughthewindows, shequi
ckly
gotupandwentt oherroom wher eshelookedat
herselfonthemirrorandfixedhersel
f.Heknocked
ont hedoorthenshet ookadeepbr eathandwalked
over.Sheopenedt henfroze.Natesmiled.
“
Thoughty
oucoul
dhi
def
rom me?
”
Anothercardrovei
nthroughtheopengat ethen
parkedbesidesNat
e’scar.Kenny’shear
tstart
ed
poundingasRonasteppedoutt akingof
fhiscapand
walkedover.
.
Qui
ckl
yli
keandcommentaft
ery
our
eadf
ami
l
yso
wecansl
otmorebonuses
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#55

Kenny’
sheartst
art
edpoundi
ngasRonast
eppedout
taki
ngoffhi
scapandwalkedov
er.Nat
ecal
mly
l
ookedathim.
“
Whati
shedoi
ngher
e?”
“
Hej
ustcame.
”
Ronatur
nedtoNat
e.“
Obat
langha?(
Whatdoy
ou
wanther
e?)
”
“WhatIam doi
ngher
eisnoty
ourbusi
ness,
obabi
wa
kengnaar
e?”
“
Ot l
anyel
atl
hemonna,
obatl
angha?Kenei
l
we,
o
j
olal
eene?(Ar
eyoudati
nghi
m?)”
“
No,
hej
ustcame.
”
“
Howdi
dheev
enknowy
ouwer
eher
e?”
“
Bat
hong,
gaket
seRona.(
Idon’
tknowRona.
)”
Ronat
urnedbackt
oNat
e.“
War
eobat
langha?
(
Whatdoy
ouwanther
e?)
”
“
Ket
lest
eKenny
.(Iam her
eforKenny
.)”
“
Otset
sehamosadi
wame?(
Youar
eher
eformy
woman.
)”
“Kennykemosadiwagagogosi
mol al
eng?(Si
nce
whenisKennyyourwoman.
)YoulostherandIam
goingtot
akeher.
”
“
Otl
any
elamomosadi
ngwamel
ait
aka!
”
“Kennyisnotyourwomanandsheisnev
ergoi
ngt
o
bey our
sagainaslongasIam her
e.”
“
Gomokechall
enge?Obatlagonchal
l
engerne
monna?(
Ist
hatachal
lenge?Youwanttochal
l
enge
me?)
”
“Kar
ekeamot sa.(
Iam tai
ngher
.)Ther
ei sno
chal
lengeher
e,j
usttel
l
ingyouwhat’
sgoingto
happen..
”
Ronaangril
ypunchedhi
m ontheface.Kenny
screamedmov i
ngbackastheyfel
lontheground
withathud.Nat
egotontopofRonaandpunched
him.
Kennyscr
eamed.“
OhmyGod!St
op!St
opi
t!Nat
e
st
op!Rona!St
opit
!”
RonapunchedNate’smouthast heywr
estl
edont he
soi
l.Qsteppedoutofthecarscreami
ngashi s
fat
herconti
nuedfi
ghti
ngstaini
nghiswhit
et-shir
t
wit
hdirt
.Kennyrushedovertohim.
“
Hey
.,
..comewi
thme.
”
“
Daddy
!”
Kennybitherlowerl
i
passhepi ckedhi
m upand
walkedwithhiminsi
dethehouselocki
ngthedoor
whil
et hef
ightwenton.Shel
ookedatQcr yi
ngthen
smiled.
“
Hey
..st
opcr
ying.Real
mendon’
tcr
y.”
“
Iwantdaddy
.”
“
Youwi
l
lgot
ohi
m.Doy
ouwantadr
ink?
”
“
Iwantmydad!
”
Kennylookedathi
m, hel
ookedsomuchl i
kehis
fat
hershecouldbarel
yseeanythi
ngofhersonhim.
Theirmatchi
nghair
cutsmadeitevenworse.
“Justwai
ther
e,hei
sst
il
l…out
side.St
ayher
e,wat
ch
Tv.”
Kenny’
sheartpoundedasshewentbackoutsi
deto
wheretheyweresti
llt
hrowi
ngpunchesateachot
her.
“
Stop!
”
Shet
ri
edget
ti
ngbetweent
hem butgotpushedback
l
andi
ngonherbut
twasspr
aini
ngherankle.
“
Ouch!
”
Theybot
hpausedt
henNat
ewal
kedov
erkneel
i
ng
befor
eher.
“
Hey
…ar
eyouok?
”
Ronapul
l
edhi
m back.“
Tswahaomar
ete.
”
Total
l
yf edup,
Nat
eangr
il
ygotupandpushedAr
ona
thenthr
ewapunch.
“
Or amangor
eomar
ete?Or
arr
agosaan!Wa
t
lhapel
wa!
”
Kennytr
iedgetti
ngherupbutthepainheldherdown.
Shetookadeepbr eat
hstar
ingatherleg.Shel
ooked
overandlookedatRonapunchNatebackev en
har
deri
nthest
omach,
Nat
egr
unt
edbendi
ngt
hen
Ronaki
ckedhi
m.
“
Nxl
a!”Ronawal
kedov
erandpul
l
edherup.
“
War
ekemang?(
Who’
she?
)”
“
Hej
ustcame,
leav
emeal
one!
”
“Ket
lagocl apa!(Iwill
slapyou.
)Todayt her
ei sno
gunhere,justmeandy ou,don’
ttestme.Ididn’t
comeall t
hewayher eforthi
sshit,osekawabat l
a
gontester
, (
don’ttestme,)whereisourson?”
“
Insi
de.
”
“
Q!Let
’sgo.
”
Qwal
kedout
.
“
Geti
nthecarbuddy
.”
“Lockt
hedoor
,thr
owt
hekey
sinsi
de,
youar
e
comingwi
thme.”
“
Iam notgoi
ngany
wher
ewi
thy
ouRona.
”
“Isai
dlock,t
hrowthekeysinsi
deandl
et’
sgo.You
aredelay
ingme.Iam ti
red.
”
Natewalkedover
.“Shei
snotgoi
ngany
wher
ewi
th
youifshedoesn’
twantt
o.”
Kennyswall
owedstar
ingatNat
eal
readyf
eel
i
ngt
he
angeronbothpar
ti
esrisi
ng.
“
It
’sokNat
e,pl
easego.
”
“
Tsamay
a!Oemet
seng?(
Leav
e.Whatar
eyou
wai
ti
ngf
or?
)”
Natel
ookedatKenny.“Don’
tbethr
eat
enedbyhi
m,
youdeserv
ebet
terthansomeonewhocheatsonyou
andattheendl
andsy ouinj
ail
.”
“
Iam f
ine.Pl
easego.
”
“
Arey
ousur
e?”
“
Yes.
”
Natenodded, heturnedandgl aredatRonat hen
walkedtohiscaranddr ov eout.Ronalookedat
Kennywhowasst andingononel egthenwal ked
i
nsidethehouse.Hegott hekey ,l
ockedthedoorand
thr
ewt hekeysinthehouset hroughtheopen
window.Hecl oseditthenpickedherupandputher
i
nt hecar.Shelookedathi m ashegoti nsi
det hecar
t
henher
ever
sedanddr
oveof
f.
“
Daddy
?Wher
eyouf
ight
ingwi
tht
hatguy
?”
“
Iwasbeat
inghi
m.Hei
sthebadguy
.Hewant
edt
o
t
akemommyaway .
”
“
Wher
eismommynow?
”
Ronapoi
ntedatKenny
.
“
Thi
sismommy
.”
Tearsr
oll
eddownKenny’
scheeksasthecargot
fi
l
ledwit
hsil
ence.Ronal
ookedather
.
“
Oshar
p?”
Sheignoredhimlookingoutthr
oughthewi ndow.
Minuteslat
erRonapar kedt
hecaratal odge,he
st
eppedoutwi thhi
ssont henwalkedroundt o
Kenny’sdoorandpickedherup.
“
Pleaset
akemebackhome.
”
“
That
’snothappeni
ng.
”
Hewentwithhert
otheroom hehadcheckedin.He
openedt
hedoorwalki
nginwithQuint
onbehindhim.
HeputKennyonthebed.
“
Daddy
,Iwantt
opee.
”
Ronapoi
ntedatadoor
.“It
hinki
t’
sri
ghtt
her
e.”
Qwalkedov ert
othedoort
hengoti
nthet
oil
etwhi
l
e
RonalookedatKenny.“
Doesi
thurt
?”
“
Whyar
eyoudoi
ngt
his?
”
“
Whyar
eyoubr
ingi
ngmeni
ntoourl
i
ves?
”
“
Ourl
i
ves?Whati
sourl
i
ves?
”
“
Iam notl
osi
ngy
out
othatt
hing.
”
Tearsf i
ll
edherey es.“Youal readyl ostme.Youl ost
met hemi nuteyoubr oughtKayt oy ourhouse.You
thi
nkaf tergoingt ojailforgoodf i
vey ears,thi
ngswi l
l
j
ustgobackt onor mal?Thatwewi l
ljusttakeof f
wher ewel ef
toff?Myl i
fegotr uinedAr ona!Awhol e
fi
vey ears….Gone…”Shel ookedathi m crying.“And
yout ellmeaboutourl ives?Yout ellmeaboutour
l
ives?Mysondon’ tev enknowme!Guesswho’ s
faul
tt hat!Ourli
ves?Yout al
kaboutourl iveswhen
yourlifewenton…y ougotbi g…y ouwat chedourson
growwhi leIwasi njailandy out alkaboutourl ives.I
regretev ermeetingy oubecausey oubr ought
nothi
ngbutpaintome.”Shepunchedhischest
cryi
ng.“Il
iv
edinpainall
becauseofyou!Inev
ergot
toattendmygraduati
onall
becauseofyou!Ihat
e
you!IhateyouArona!
”
Thebathroom dooropenedt
henQwalkedout
.
Kennystoppedandlookedawaywi
pingawayher
tear
s.Ronagotup.
“
Iam goi
ngt
otakeashower
.”
Hewalkedt
ot hebat
hroom t
aki
ngoffdi
rtyt
-shi
rt
.Q
l
ookedatKennyforawhil
ethenshetur
nedtohim
andsmil
ed.
“Whydi
dyougof
ort
het
ri
pleav
ingdaddyandI
al
one?”
Tearsrol
l
edwonhercheeksthensheputherhand
overhermout
hcr
ying.“
Iam sorr
y.”
Hewal
kedov
erandt
ouchedherf
ace.
“
Wemi
ssedy
ou.
”
Kennyhuggedhi
m cryi
ng.“
Imi
ssedy
out
oo.I
missedyoutoobaby
…”
“
Don’
tcr
y.Iam notangr
y.”
Shenoddedcr
ying.“
Iknow.
.”
Qsadl
yhuggedhi
smot
her
.“Wear
egoi
ngt
obea
r
ealf
amil
ynow.”
“
Yes.
”
Theyst
ayedli
ket
hatf
oracoupl
eofmi
nut
est
henQ
l
ookedathersmi
li
ng.
“
Daddysai
dwear
egoi
ngt
ohav
eababy
.”
Kennywi
pedawayhert
ear
s.“
Oneday
..
”
“
Soonr
ight
?”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
May
be.Godwi
l
lbl
essuswi
thachi
l
d.”
“Daddysaidgr
ownupsmakebabi
eswhentheyl
ove
eachotherandki
ssl
iket
hepeopl
eonTVtaki
ngoff
thei
rcl
othes.
”
“Youwat
chpeopl
et aki
ngofft
hei
rcl
othesonTV?
Daddyl
et’
syouwatchthat
?”
“
Itwasonce.
”
“
Oh…”
“
Yougoi
ngt
ocomeandst
aywi
thussowecanbea
r
eal
fami
l
yri
ght
?”
“
Uh…-
“
“That’sgoingt
obesoawesome.Ican’twai
ttotel
l
them atschoolthatmymom i
sback.Zakessai
dI
didn’thavemom, nowhei
sgoingt
oswal l
owhis
wor ds.”
“
Arey
ouhungr
y?”
“No,weate,Il
eftsomeforyou.I
t’
sinthecar
.Letme
askdaddyifIshouldgoandgetyourshar
e.Youare
hungryr
ight
? ”
“
Wai
tti
l
lhef
ini
shesbat
hing.
”
“
Ok.
”Qlookedatherandsmi
l
ed.“
Youar
ebeaut
if
ul
l
i
kethepi
ctur
esathome.”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Thanky
ou,
youar
etoo.
”
“
Gir
lsar
ebeaut
if
ul.Boy
sar
enotbeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Yes…ar
eyounott
ir
ed?
”
“
Idon’
twantt
osl
eep,
whati
fyougoaway
?”
“
Iam notgoi
ngt
ogoaway
.”
“
Iam goi
ngt
oti
eust
oget
hersoy
oudon’
tgoaway
.”
Ronawalkedoutwit
hat owelar
oundhiswai
st,
Kennyl
ookedathischestthent
urnedbackt
oher
son.
“
Irany
ouabat
h.”
Kennyslowlyst
oodupstandi
ngononef
oot
.Rona
walkedoverandpi
ckedherup.
“
Icanwal
k.”
“
Iknow.
”
Hewalkedwithheri
nsidethebat
hroom t
henputher
down.Helookedinhereyes.
“Iam sorry
,forever
ything.Youhaveev
eryr
ightt
obe
angry
, Idon’tbl
amey ou.Pleasegi
vemeachanceto
fi
xourr el
ati
onship.
”
“
Ther
ei snot
hingy
ouar
efi
xi
ngi
fther
eisnot
hingl
eft
t
obefixed.
”
Qopenedt
hedoor
.Ronat
urnedt
ohi
m.
“
Buddy
,goandwat
chTV.
”
“
Gowi
thhi
m.Iwantt
obat
h.”
Ronasi ghedthenwal
kedoutclosi
ngthedoor
behind.Kennytookof
fherdressandpantythengot
i
nt hetubf i
l
ledwit
hwaterandsighedrel
axi
ng.

*
**

Esisi
ghedasshelookedattheGabor
onel
i
ght
s
l
ist
eningt
oAli
ciaKeyswhiledri
vi
nghome.

Hav
eyouev
ert
rysl
eepi
ngwi
thabr
okenhear
t?
Wel
lyoucoul
dtr
ysl
eepi
ngi
nmybed
Lonel
y,ownme,
nobodyev
ershuti
tdownl
i
key
ou

Youworet
hecr
own,
youmademybodyf
eel
heav
en
bound
Whydon'
tyouhol
dme,
needme
It
houghty
out
oldme,
you'
dnev
erl
eav
eme
Looki
ngi
ntheskyIcoul
dseey
ourf
ace
ThenIknewr
ightwher
eIf
iti
n
Takeme,makeme,
youknowt
hatI
'
llal
way
sbei
n
l
ovewit
hyou
Ri
ghtt
il
ltheend

Sotoni
ght
,I'
m gonnaf
indawayt
omakei
twi
thout
you
Toni
ght
,I'
m gonnaf
indawayt
omakei
twi
thouty
ou
I
'
m gonnahol
dont
othet
imest
hatwehad
Toni
ght
,I'
m gonnaf
indawayt
omakei
twi
thout
you

Shef rownedasat earroll

eddown, shecoul dn’
t
understandwhyshewascr yingnowwhent hewhole
dri
vefrom Tshabongshehadbeenf i
ne.Their
conversati
onplayedinherheadbr eakingherheart
fur
ther.Itwasthepri
dei nhiseyes,thepri
deofa
cheati
ngman.ThatwasnotherMaat l
aanymor e.
Shestoppedt
hecarunabl
etohol
ditany
mor
eand
brokedowncry
ing.
.
.
Li
keandcommentassoonasy
our
eadsowecan
squeezei
nanot
herbonus
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#56

Lat
erthatnightQuint
onsighedhappi
l
ylyi
ng
bet
weenhi sparents,hi
shandti
edtohismother
’s
wit
hashoel ace.Kennysmil
edashetoldherabout
hi
steacheratschool.
“MsBooisreal
lyni
ce,di
dyouknowshegi v
esus
sweet
swheneverweanswerinclass?Sheonce
cameoverathonme.”
Ronaqui
cklyl
ookedatKenny.“Shewasdroppi
ngoff
hi
sjer
sey.Hehadforgot
tenitatschool
.Shel
eftas
soonasshegaveitt
ome. ”
“
Butshecookedf
orus.
”
“
Jesus!Cany
ousl
eep?
”
“Iam st
il
ltalki
ngtomama.Aker
eshewasn’
tther
e,
soIam tell
ingherev
ery
thi
ng.
”
Qturnedbackt
oKenny.Kennypul
l
edhim cl
oser
put
ti
ngherarm ar
oundhim.“Ar
en’
tyout
ir
ed?”
Hey
awnedthenshookhi
shead.“
No.Ar
eyout
ir
ed?
Doy
ouwanttosleep?
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
No.
”
“
Ok,
Iam goi
ngt
otel
lMsBooabouty
ou.
”
“
Ok.
”
“Sowhat
’syourf
avori
tef
ood?Youknowaunt
y
AmbercooksdaddyandI-
“
“
Qui
nton,
sleep.It’
slat
e.Iam swit
chingof
fthel
ight
.
Mommyistired.Youareti
redtoo.Let’
ssl
eep.
”
“
ButIam st
il
ltel
l
inghert
hatAunt
yAmber
-“
“
Youwi
l
ltel
lhert
omor
row.Sl
eep.
”
Ronagotupandswi t
chedofft
heli
ghtasKennyand
Qgiggl
edwhisper
ing.Kennyki
ssedhi
sfor
ehead.
“
Sleep.Youar
eti
red.Iam notgoingany
wher
e.When
y
ouwakeup, Iwi
l
l beher
ewi thyou.”
Qy
awned.“
Ican’
twai
tforust
ogohome.
”
“
Goodni
ght
.”
“
Goodni
ghtmama.
”
Hecl osedhiseyessleepi
ng.Afewmi nut
eswentby
thenhest ar
tedbreathi
ngsoft
ly.Ronagotup,
switchedont heli
ghtthenwentovertoKenny
’ssi
de.
“
Ronapl
ease…Ij
ustwantt
osl
eep.
”
“Iwantt
omassagey ourankl
e.Youareinpain.
”He
stoodbyherf
eetatbed.“Movetothecenterofthe
bed.”
Kennymov edhersont henlayint hemi ddleoft he
bedt henhegent lymassagedherankl e.Kenny
fl
inchedatt hepain,Ronacont inuedmassagi ngher
ti
llsherelaxedclosingherey esfeel i
ngsl eepy.Rona
l
ookedathert henatQast heybot hslept.Thiswas
j
ustper fecti
on,allhehadt odowasgethi sgir
lback.
Hecoul dact ual
lyunderstandherangerandwas
will
ingtohumbl ehi mselfti
llhewasf orgiven.May be
theyneededt oatt
endsomecounsel ingsessi ons,
yeah, t
hathadt owor k.Hegotupt henki ssedher
cheek.Het ookof fhist-shi
rtswitchingof fthelight
thenlaybesi deherputtinghisarm ar oundherwi tha
sigh.
*
**

Esi layonherbedt hatni

ght,shecoul dn’tseem to
sleepnomat terhowshet r
ied.Shelistenedt othe
raindropsshowi ngov erherroofthencl osedher
eyesy etagai
ntry i
ngtosleep.Sheopenedherey es
att heknockont hedoorthenshegotup.I nthe
sitti
ngr oom,shepeakedbyt hewi ndowandl ooked
atMaat labythedoor .
“
Babe,
openup!
”
Sheclosedthecurtai
nandwentbackt
oher
bedroom wheresheputonherear
phonesi
nherear
s
cutt
ingoffhi
sv oi
celi
steni
ngt
osomesoothi
ng
music.

Meanwhil
eMaatl
aknockedout
sideasthecol
d
wi
ndsthatcamewit
htherai
nthrashedhi
m.
“
Babe!Esi
!”
Therewassi
l
ence,
helookedatt
herai
nt henputhi
s
bagdownandrantot
heirwi
ndow.Heviolent
ly
knocked.
“
Babe,
openup!
”
Heknockedagai
nbuttherewasnoresponse.He
wentbacktot
heverandagoi
ngundertheshadenow
dr
ippi
ngwetthenknockedonthedooragai
n.
“Babe!Pleaseopent hedoor .
”Hesneezedshaki ng
withcoldness.Minuteslaterhegaveupt hentook
offthewetcl ot
hesandt ookoutt hedryonesfrom
hissmal lbagthatheputon.Wi t
hhi sphoneoff,he
couldn’tevencallanyone.Hungryandcold,hesatby
thev er
anda,hisarmsar oundhimselftokeepwar m
ashesneezedy etagain.

*
**

Thefol
l
owingmorni
ngMothusiwokeupandj
oined
Nanaoint
heki
tchenasshecookedbr
eakf
ast
.
“
Hey
…”
Nanaosmi
l
ed.“
Hi.
”
Helookedatherbodyhuggi
ngr
eddr
esst
hat
showedhercleav
age.
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“
Iam goi
ngoutwi
tht
hegi
rl
s.”
“
Whatgi
rl
s?”
“
Myf
ri
ends.
”
“
HowcomeIdon’
tknowt
hem?
”
“
Youwoul
dn’
t,
Ijustr
ecent
lymett
hem.
”
Mothusiheldherhands.“I
fyouthi
nkIam nol
onger
goodenoughf oryou,pl
easetel
lme.Noneedtofeel
shy,
ifyouhav efoundsomeoneelset
ell
mesoIcan
setyoufree.
”
Nanaol
ookedathi
m wi
thgui
l
t.“
Whatdoy
ou
mean?”
“I
fyouhavefoundsomeonebettert
hanme,t
ell
me.I
am notgoi
ngtof orcey
outobewithmewhen
cl
earl
yyourheartissomewher
eelse.
”
Nanaosi
ghed.“
Whenar
eyougoi
ngt
omar
ryme?I
t
houghtIwoul
dn’
taskbuti
t’
sbeenf
ivey
ear
s.”
“
Youwantt
ogetmar
ri
ed?
”
“
Yes!Iam t
ir
edofwai
ti
ng.
”
Mothusisi
ghed.“
Iam goi
ngt
omar
ryy
ou,
can’
tyou
bepati
entwit
hme? ”
“Ihavebeenpati
entforthel
astfi
veyears.Younever
tal
kaboutourfutur
e.Iam ti
redofwait
ingforyou.
Selet
sogotmar r
iedwithi
n-“
“Whatwor ksforSel etsoandherhusbandmaynot
workforusbecausewear etwodi ff
erentpeopl e.I
l
ovey ou,Idodi scussourf uturewithy oubutof
causenowy ouwon’ tseeitbecausey ouhav e
al
lowedy ourselftobel ievethatther easonwhyI
havenotmar r
iedy oui sbecauseIdon’ tlov ewhen
i
t’
snott hecase.Sel et soismyex, Idon’ tthinkyou
shouldbet aki
ngadv icefrom someonewhowas
j
ealousofal lt
het hingsIdi df oryousay i
ngIam
wasti
ngmoney .Shewi l
lsaywhat everi tissot hat
wecanbr eakup.I fy ouwantt oleave,y oumay
l
eave.”
Nanaol
ookedathi
mthensi
ghedembar
rassed.
“NowIam reall
ystar
tingtowonderwhatcan
possi
blyhappenwhenImar r
yyou,y
ouwi l
lpr
obabl
y
tel
lourpr
oblemstoSel et
soandletheradvi
ceyou.
Havefunwithyourfr
iends.”
Hewalkedoutpr
essinghi
sphone.Mothusisi
ghed
asKenny’
sphonedidn’
tgothrough,
evenherl
ast
seenonWhatsAppwaswor r
isome.Hesenthertext
.
Mot
husi
:Hey
,ar
eyouok?
”
Nanaowal kedf r
om t
heki
tchenanddi
sappear
edin
thei
rbedroom.Moment sl
atershewal
kedoutinher
ordi
naryclothes.

*
**

Bofel
ol ookedather
selfonhercompactmirroragai
n
thensteppedoutofthecarandwalkedinsi
det he
hospi
tal t
owhereherdaughterwasthenheldher
handsmi li
ng.
“
Heybaby
..
”
“
Mama,
wher
eisdaddy
?”
“
Itwasr
aini
ngsohecoul
dn’
tcome.
”
“
Ok,
cal
lhi
m.”
“
Hisphonegotdr
enchedi
nwat
er.
”
Bofel
o’smotherwalkedinholdi
nghery
ounger
daughter
.“ThankGody ouarehere.
”
Bofel
osmi
ledasDi
amondgotdownandj
umpedi
n
herar
ms.“
Mama!”
Bofel
o’motherl
ookedatherdaught
er’
sbumpand
shookherhead.
“
Whenar
eyougoi
ngt
ost
op?
”
Bof
elolookedathert
hensmi l
edpl
acingDiamond
onthebedbesidehersi
ster
.Shewalkedoutwit
hher
mother
.
“
RragweSa-
“
“Hei
smar r
iedf
orGoodnesssake!Whyarey
ou
dest
roy
inganot
herwoman’smarriage?
”
“
RragweSapphi
rewon’
tletmel
eav
e.”
“
Isheal
sof
orci
ngy
out
okeepget
ti
ngpr
egnantl
i
ke
t
his?
”
“
Youdon’
tknowhi
m,whathesay
sgoesand-
“
“
Whyi
syourf
aceswol
l
en?
”
“
All
ergi
creact
ion.
”
“Soar eyoutel
li
ngmey ouar enevergoingtoget
mar r
iedbutjustkeeprunni ngaft
eramar ri
edman
fortherestofyourli
felikeaf ool
?Doy ouknowt hat
hiswifecansuey oual otofmoney ,i
fyouf ai
ltopay
thatmoneyy ouwi l
lgotoj ail
.”
“
KanamamaMaat
la-
“
“Heisf
orci
ngt
hisr
elat
ionshi
p?I
shef
orci
ngy
out
o
stay
?”
“Hesai
dIwill
regr
eti
tifIcheatonhi
m andt
hatwas
aft
erhebeatme.Iam scar
ed.”
“
Hebeaty
ou?
”
Bof
elonoddedcr
ying.
“Hemustbedoingallthi
sbecauseheknowsy our
Fat
herisdeadandthereisnoonet oprot
ectyou.
”
Shetookoutherphone.“Iam cal
li
ngyourbrot
her.I
havehaditwi
ththi
sman.Iam si ckandti
redofit
.”
*
**

Esicleanedherhousesi
lentl
yasMaat l
aknocked
outsi
de.Shecleanedeverycornert
henmade
breakfastf
orhersel
f.Awhil
elatershesatdownand
start
edeating.
“
Babe!Pl
easeopenup!Iam br
eaki
ngt
hewi
ndow.
”
Shechangedt
hechannel
eat
ingunbot
her
ed.

Outside,Maatlagrabbedhi
swett -
shi
rtandwrapped
i
taroundabr i
ckthenshutt
eredthewindow.He
draggedt hecurt
aintotheothersi
deandlookedat
Esiwat chingTv.
“Babe,
comeon..
.Canwetal
k?Iam sor
ryabout
whathappenedy
ester
day
.MycarhadabreakdownI
swear.
”
Shei
ncr
easedt
hev
olumeont
heTVwat
chi
ng.
“
Openf
orme.Iam col
d.”
Esif
ini
shedeati
ngthengotupandwentwi t
hher
pl
atetotheki
tchen.Momentsl
atershedecreased
hervol
umecalli
ngsomeone.
“Hell
o?Dumelang,Ihav
eaproblem atmyhouse.
Thereisacrazymanoutsi
deandhei sbreaki
ngmy
windows,Iam scar
edandpregnant
.Pleasecome
andhelpme.”
Maatlal
ookedatherasshegavethem heraddr
ess.
Sheputherphonedownandincreasedthevol
ume
cont
inui
ngwatchi
ng.

*
**

Aronast oppedthecari
nf r
ontofKenny
’syar
dthen
steppedoutwi t
hhissonwal ki
ngi
n.Kennysi
ghed
andf oll
owedaftert
hem.Thedoorwasopen
meani nghergrandmotherwasawake.Kennywalked
i
nsidet hehouseasRonaf oll
owedhim.
“
Mmama…”
Shewentt
oherbedr
oom andf
oundherr
eadi
ngher
bi
ble.
“
Mmama…”
Hergrandmot
herl
ookedather
,Kennysatdown
besi
deher.
“
It
’sKenny
.”
“Kenny
…”ShelookedatKennyf
orawhi
l
ethen
Kennysmi
led.
“
Kef
il
we’
sdaught
er,
yourgr
anddaught
er.Kenny
.”
Hergr
andmot
herl
aughed.“
Soy
ousneakwhi
l
eIam
sl
eepi
ng?”
Kennypausedt
henl
aughed.“
Iwaswor
ri
ed.
”
“Thi
sthi
ngthaty
oudi
dreal
lyworks.
”Shepoint
edat
themani
lapaper
sonthewall
thatweref
il
ledwit
h
basi
cdetai
l
s.”
“
Itdoes,
didy
oueat
?”
“
Uhno.Ij
ustwant
edt
othankGodf
ort
hisday
.
Wher
ewereyou?”
“
RragweQuintoni
sheret
oseey
ou,
Qui
nton,
myson
wi
thhisf
atherRona.
”
“
Ok,
letmecome.Ar
eyouseei
nghi
m agai
n?”
“
No.
”
Shehelpedhergrandmot herchangethenthey
walkedtothesit
ti
ngr oom whereRonawasseat ed
wit
hQ.Kennypi ckedherphoneandl eftt
hem tal
king
asshelookedatallthemi ssedcal
lsshehad.She
l
ookedatEsi’snumbert henbitherl
owerli
pcalli
ng
herback.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
…”
“
Soyouwalkoutofpr
isonandnev
erbothertel
li
ng
me?It
houghtweweremor et
hanjustgi
rl
fr
iends.
”
“
Wear
e,Iam sor
ry.Ij
ustneededsomemet
ime.
”
“
Met
imey
aengKenei
l
we?
”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Iam r
eal
l
ydi
sappoi
ntedi
nyou.
”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Whenar
eyoucomi
ngt
hissi
de?
”
“
Idon’
thav
eaj
obt
obecomi
ngt
hatsi
de.
”
“Ar
eyougoingtof
ixt
hingswit
hRona?Youknowhe
hasbeenwait
ingf
orf
iveyear
s,hehasbeen
behav
ing.
”
“
Iwantt
ofi
xthi
ngswi
thmyl
i
feandmyson.
”
“Igeti
t.Maatlaischeat
ing,
andhehasachi l
d
outsi
demar ri
age.Canyoubeli
eveit
?After
everyt
hingIhavedonethisist
hethanksIgetandhe
keepslyingaboutit
.”
“Iwasshockedt oowhenRonatoldmebutGod, i
t’
s
beenfiveyearsandhenevertol
dyouaboutthechil
d,
menr eal
ly…”Kennyputherhandoverhermouth,
her
heartpounding.
“
What
?”
“
Huh?
”
“
Whatdi
dyousay
?”
“
Not
hing.Ij
ust
-“
“
Youknew?
”
“
Nono…”
“
Thenwhatdoyoumeanwheny ousayit
’sbeenf
ive
y
earsandhenevert
oldmeaboutthechi
l
d?”
“
Imeant
….Iam sor
ry.Esi
-“
“
Wow!
”
“Nono,l
ist
entome,Icoul
dn’
tjusttel
lyou,
Iwas
scar
edIwouldbr
eakyourmarriageandRonatol
d
nott
o.”
“Youaresupposedtobemyf ri
end,
isthi
show
fri
endstr
eateachother
?Ithoughtyouhadmyback
becauseIal
way shaveyour
s.”
“
Ido…Ido.
.Iam sor
rybut
-“
Esihungup,Kennytri
edcall
ingherbackbutthe
numberdidn’tgothr
ough.Ronastuckhishead
i
nsideherroom andlookedather.
“
Hey
…canwet
alk.
”
Kennyputherphonedownst
ari
ngathi
m.
“
Aboutwhat
?”
“
Qisr
eal
l
yexci
tedaboutusgoi
nghome.
”
“
Youar
etheonewhomadehi
m bel
i
evet
hatl
i
e.”
Hewal
kedinclosi
ngthedoor
.“Iam t
hinki
ngIcan
l
eav
ehim her
e,hedoesn’
twanttopartwit
hyou.”
“
Hecanst
ay.
”
Ronawalkedov
erandputhi
shandsonherwai
stas
shest
aredathi
m.
“Imessedupbabe…IknowIdi d,bigti
me.Iknow
thereisnoamountofapol ogiesIcanmaket hatwill
makeupf ori
tbutIl ovey ou.Iwantt olovey ouright,
givey outhelov eyoudeser v
e, t
histimenogames.
Wear eaf amil
y, Iwantust obehusbandandwi fe
andr aiseoursont ogether.Pleasegivemeonel ast
chancet osett hingsright.IloveyouandIknowy ou
l
ov emet ooevent houghy ouar eangry.Iam wi l
li
ng
todoany thi
ngt orestoreourr elat
ionships.Ihav e
beenwai t
ingfory ouallthistime,pleaseletmef ix
thi
s,letmemendy ourbrokenhear t…”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#57

Kennysi
ghedst
ari
ngathi
m.
“Alothashappened.Idon’ tt hinkthingswi llev erbe
thesame.Il ovedy ousomucht hatIforgotmy sel fin
themi ddleofi tall andIl osti tallbecauseImade
youmywor l
d.Iexpect edt hi ngst obei nacer tai n
wayandIgothur tint hepr ocess.Idon’ tthinkIam i n
therightst atetobei nar elat i
onshi p,notwhenIst ill
feell
iket his.Iwantt of ocusonbei ngabet t
er
personf ormeandmyson.Iam gr atefulthaty ou
haver ai
sedt hatli
t tl
eguyev ent houghhet akesaf ter
youal ot.Qi st hebestt hingy ouhav eev ergiv enme
andIwi llforeverbegr ateful.Idon’ tknow, may bei n
thefuturewewi ll
bet oget herbutf ornow, Idon’ t
wantt obei nanyr elationshi p.ButIl ovey ou.Iwas
l
y i
ngy esterday ,Iwoul dnev erhat ey ou.Idon’ tt hinkI
canev erhat ey oubecauseIl ov eyousomuch. ”
Tearsf i
ll
edherey est henshel ookedupt ryi
ng
bli
nkingawayhert earsasherl ipstrembl ed.She
openedhermout
htocont
inuebutpai
nchokedher
.
Ronapul
l
edhercl
oserasshecr
ied.
Hesighedtearf
ull
y.“Iam sorr
ybabe…Iam sorr
y,i
f
Kayhadn’tbeeninthehouseal otwoul
dhavebeen
avoi
ded.Iam sorry
,Ishouldhavekeptherof
f.I
shoul
dhav edoneal otdi
ffer
ent.
”
“Ishouldhavewal
kedaway
.Ishoul
dhav
ewal
ked
awayt hatni
ght
.”
“Your
eact
edthewayIwouldhav
er eact
edhadI
beeni
nyourposi
ti
on.Youar
eonlyhuman.”
Hel
ookedatherwi
pingawayhert
ear
s.“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“Il
ovey oubutIdon’ tthi
nky ouandIwil
leverget
backt ogether.Thepastfiveyear
staughtme
somet hingandIam notgoi ngtorepeatthesame
mistakeagai n.Youhav ethepowertobreakmeand
Idon’tthinkIam strongenought obehurtagain
that
’swhyIt oldyouthatyoucouldmov eon.”
“Iam notgoi
ngany
wher
e,Iam goi
ngt
owai
tti
l
lyou
areready.
”
“
Idon’
twanty
out
owai
t.
”
“
Iam goingt o.Iam goingtofi
ghtforthi
s
r
elati
onship,forourfamil
y.Ihavecomet oof
art
o
j
ustgiveitup.Ifit
’sspaceyouwantt henIwi
l
lgi
vei
t
t
oy ou.”
Heleanedoverandki
ssedher.Sheshi
ver
edashe
ki
ssedhergoodandhard,shehadmissedthosel
i
ps
onhers,hi
stouch…
Hecar essedherbodyt hroughherdress’
st hi
n
text
ure.Shekissedhi m backasherpantiesgotwet
whileherpussyt hr
obbed.Shebr eat
hedheav il
y,each
touchseemedt obecausi ngf
lamest hr
oughouther
bodyandt hef actt
hathersonandgr andmot her
wereint heroom didn’
tstopherfrom getti
ngso
aroused.
Hisdickgotharderinhi spant sjerki
ng.Rona
squeezedherbr eastthenhi shandwentunderher
dressandsli
dhi shandi nsideherpant i
estouchi
ng
herpussy.Hegr untedsoftlyagai nstherli
psfeel
ing
herwetness.Shewassor eadyandhecoul di
magine
howi twoul
df eelpushingt hroughandt akingaway
hersecondaryvirgi
nit
y .I
thadpr obabl yshrunkback.
Kennymoanedasher ubbedhercl itbeforesl
i
dingin
afingerinsi
de.Het appedasweetspot ,shemoaned
i
nsidehismout hal mostl osingbalance.Ronalayher
ont hebedthent ookof fherdr esstogetherwit
hher
pant i
esandlookedathercl eanpussy .Heopened
l
egst hendippedhi sfacebet weenherl egstasti
ng
her.Kennyclosedherey essqueezi ngherbreasthe
wor kedhistongueonhercl i
twhi l
et appi
ngherupper
pl
at eswithhistwof i
nger s.
“
Ohmy
….Ronaaa….Mhmmmm…”
Hemov edhi smout hsucki
nghercl i
tandkissingher
pussyasi fhewaski ssi
ngherli
pswhi l
ehisfingers
wor kedinsideher.Kennygrabbedherpill
owandput
i
tonherf acemoani ngashertoesbeguncur li
ng.It
feltsogoodshegr i
ndedherwai sthisf
ace,the
pleasureintensi
fi
ed.
Shepr essedthepil
lowt oherfacemoaninglouder
asshespasmed, herlegsshaking.Ronagotup
takingof fhi
st -
shi
rtthengotbet weenherl
egsand
threwt hepill
owont hefl
oor.Hekissedherl
etti
ng
hert asteherjui
cesonhi m.Hepausedandl ookedat
herbr eastthensqueezedt hem.
“
Fuck…”
Hel eanedov erandsuckedt hem t
hewayababy
woul d,Kennymoanedf eelingherpussyl i
ter
ally
l
eaki ng.Hegr azedhi steet honhernipplesasshe
rubbedhi shead.Ronapausedt hentookoutt he
har dmonst erdickandsmackedhert hickpussywi th
i
t .Kennyopenedherl egsev enmorebr eathi
ng
heav il
ywithlust.Her ubbedi tupanddownhersl i
t,
allit’
sveinsstickingout .Kennylookedati tknowing
theamountofpl easuret hatmonstercouldgi veher.
Ithadbeensomanyy earsbutthatdidn’tmeanher
memor ywasshor t.
Kennymov edherwai stast heyhumpedoneach
otherki
ssing.Hisdi ckgotev enhardert henhe
l
ookedatherbr eathingheav i
lyandgent lypushedat
herentr
ance.Thet ipsqueezedi n.Ronagr oanedas
herwarmthcoat edhi m whilehert i
ghtnesscl enched
him.Hishear tpoundedsomuchashel ookedather
knowingifhedi dn’ttakei teasyhewoul dn’tl
ast.He
sl
idinslowlyst r
etchingt hatpussyasshef li
nched
putti
ngherhandsonhi schest .Ronapi nnedher
handsont opofherheadwi thhishandand
#r
emov
ed.
.
Kenny’
shear
tpoundedasQscr
eamedf
orheri
nthe
si
tt
ingroom.
“
Mama!
”
“
Didy
oul
ock?
”
“
What
?No…”
“
Youneedt
ost
ophei
scomi
ng.
”
Ronaservedherthedeepst r
okesgr
unt
ing
i
mmer sedinult
imatepleasure.
“
FuckIcan’
t…i
t’
stoogood.
”
Kennymoanedmov
ingherwai
st.“
Weneedt
ost
op.
Heiscoming.
”
“
Mama!
”
Ronaqui
ckl
ypull
edherup,hi
sdickplungedi
nside
hert
henwentwit
hhertothedoorwher ehepl
aced
hi
erdownagai
nstitandcur
vedhisbackpushi
ngin.
Kennyst
oodonhert
oesast
hatdi
ckwental
lthe
wayi
njustasQpusheddownt
hedoorknobt
ogeti
n.
“
Q…goandsi
tdown.Iam comi
ng.
”
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngi
nther
e?”
“
Goandsi
tdown!Getanappl
efr
om t
hef
ri
dge.
”
RonaputKenny
’st
ogetherast
heyhear
dfoot
steps
walki
ngawayand#removed.
.
Kennyscr eamedi ntothebedcummi ngasRona
poundedi ntoherf r
om theback.Hi sdi
ckjerkedas
heonceagai nfil
ledherpussyup.Hel ookedup
pressinghisli
pst ogetherandgav eheronelast
thrustempt i
ngallhisseedsi nsi
deher.Heslowly
sli
doutst ari
ngathi scum drippi
ngoutherthenhe
pushedi tal
lbackwi thhisdick.
Hefli
ppedhert
henlookedatherpussyashisdick
gotsemihar
d.Helookedatherbeauti
ful
face.
“It
akebackev ery
thingIsaid,
Idi
dn’tmeani
t,Iam
notgoingtogiveyouspace.Wear egoi
ngtofix
thi
ngs.Youarenotgoi ngtokeepmeawayfrom my
pussy.Youaremi neandmi neonl
y.Weareaf ami
ly
.
Wej
ustmadeoursecondchi
l
d.”
Kennyl
ookedathim exhaust
ed.Hegotontopofher
ki
ssedhercaressi
ngherbodywhil
esett
li
ngbetween
herl
egswithhisharddi
ck.
“
NoRona…mygr
andmot
heri
s..
”
“
Iwi
l
lbequi
ck.
”
“
NoRona…nonor mal
peopl
etal
kfort
hisl
ongThi
s
i
sdi
srespect
ful
.”
Heputherlegsonhisshoul
der
sandwat
ched
hi
mselfsl
ideinyetagai
n…

*
**

Awhil
elat
erKennywat
chedRonabi
dfar
ewel
ltohi
s
gr
andmother
.
“
Thanky
ouf
orbr
ingi
ngmygr
eat
-gr
andsonmyboy
.”
“I
t’
sok.Iwi
llcomebackandt
akehi
m wheny
ou
havehadenough.
”
“
Okmyboy
…”
RonalookedatKennyandhi
sson.“
Youguy
scan
walkme.”
KennyheldQ’shandwal ki
nginherwetpantiesthen
Qgr abbedhisfat
her’
shandandwal kedbetweenhis
parentstothecar.Ronaunl
ockedthecarturni
ngt o
them, hel
ookedatQwi thasmile.
“
Q,y
ouar
egoi
ngt
ost
aywi
th-
“
“
Mamaandhergr
andmot
her
.”
“
Good.Iwi
l
lcomeandt
akey
ou.
”
“
Takemeandmamar
ight
?”
Ronal
ookedatKennyandnodded.“
Yes.Youand
mama.”
Hebumpedf
istwi
thhi
ssont
henl
ookedatKenny
.
“
Babymama.
.”
Kennyroll
edherey
esthenRonasmi
l
edandki
ssed
herhol
dingherwai
st.
“
Fuck,Iwantt
obendy our
ightnowandf
ucky
ou
t
henleaveyoudr
ippi
ngevenmor e.
”
“
Go.
”
Hekissedherevenmoresqueezi
ngherbut t
.Kenny
putherhandsonhisbi
cepskissi
nghim back.Q
l
aughedputti
nghishandsonhisface.Kennymov ed
back.
“
Q,y
oucanwai
tformamai
nthehouse.Behav
eok?
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Ilov
eyoumyboy
.”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Heranbacki
nsi
det
hehouse.Ronat
urnedbackt
o
Kenny
.
“
Geti
nthecar
,let
sdi
scussaf
ewt
hings.
”
“
NgngRona.Whycan’
twediscussi
ther
e?Whydo
weneedt
ogeti
nsi
dethecar
? ”
“
Iam notgoi
ngt
odoany
thi
ngt
oyou.Iam f
ull
.”
Shel
ookedatt
het
enti
nhi
spant
sthenhel
aughed.
“Babe,Ican’tcontrolhi
m especi
all
ywhenIknowyou
arestandingrighttherewit
hapussyfull
wi t
hmy
cum.ButIswear ,Iwon’tdoanyt
hingt
oy ou.
”
Heopenedthedoorforher
.Kennysi
ghedt
hengotin.
Hewalkedr
oundthecarandsatonthedri
ver
’sseat
l
ocki
ngthecardoors.
“Comeandsither
e…”Het
appedhi
slapwhi
l
ehe
adjust
edhi
sseat.
“No!Iam nothavi
ngsexwit
hyouagai
n.Anyonecan
seeus.Mygr andmot
hercanwal
koutand-
“
Hepulledheroverandplacedheronhi slapasshe
str
addledhi
m.Hel ookedatt hewetstainonher
panti
esthentoucheditpressingheral
ready
thr
obbingcli
t.
“
Ronacany
oust
opt
his?
”
“
Onef
ort
her
oad…”
“
No.St
op!
”
Het ookouthisdi
ckasshetri
edunlocki
ngt
hedoors
soshecangetout .Hepushedherpanti
est
ot he
sideandpushedbetweenherpussyli
pspar
ting
them thensl
idinwit
hagrunt.
“
Fuck!Ther
ewego!
”
Kennygaspedt
ryi
ngt
osi
tpr
oper
lywhi
l
ethatdi
ck
t
ookinal
lthespace,
herhear
tpounded,
shecoul
d
f
eelhi
sdi
cksitt
ingfi
rml
ydeepinher.
Shelookedathi
m.“Whyarey
oudoi
ngt
hist
ome?
Haven’
tyouhadenough?
”
Hepulledheri
nf orakiss,hishandsonherwai st
andstart
edthr
ust i
ngfrom beneath.Soon,t
heir
bodieswerecl
appingagai nsteachother
.Kenny
mov edherwai
stl i
keherfriendhadtaughtheri
nj ai
l
,
Ronagaspedasshedi dt hewomanont optri
cks
star
ingathimloseit.
.
Ronasqueezedherbut
tpl
eadi
ngwi
thher
.
“
Hol
yfuckbabe…pl
easest
op…wai
tasecond.
.”
Kennywentevenfast ermoaninginpl
easur
e,her
pussyspasmed.Shemov edonhimt i
ll
heshothis
l
oadsqueezingherbodyal mostbreaki
ngherbones.
Shemov edherwaistagaindraini
nghimthenshe
l
ookedathim ashel azil
yst
aredbackatherwith
hal
fopeneyessmiling.
“
Thatwas…wow!
”
Kennygotuplett
inghi
m sli
deoutt henfi
xedthe
bri
dgeofpanti
es.Herpantiesgotevenwetter
,she
openedthedoorandsteppedout.Ronareachedfor
thewipesheusuall
ykeptforQandwi pedhisdick
thenpackedi
tinhispantsstar
ingather.
“
Wher
edi
dyoul
ear
nhowt
odot
hat
?”
“
ByeRona.
”
“Nono..wait
..Iwantedtogi
veyouthi
s..
”Hetook
outhisbankcardfrom hi
swall
etandhandeditt
o
her.
“
What
’st
his.
”
“GetQsomeclothes,hedi
dn’
tbri
ngmuchcl
othes,
getfoodandany
thingyouwant.
”
Kennyl
ookedatt
hecar
dandnodded.“
Ok.
”
“
Wher
eisy
ourcar
?”
“
Att
heback.
”
“
What
’wr
ongwi
thi
t?”
“
Itwasbei
ngusedandnowt
her
eissomet
hing
wrongwi
thit
.”
“
Takei
ttoamechani
c.Geti
tfi
xed.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Shar
paker
e?”
“
Bye.
”
Sheturnedandwal
kedaway
.Ronasmi
l
edst
ari
ngat
herass.
“
Kenny
!”
Shet
urnedt
ohi
m.“
Rra?
”
Hesmiled.“
Keagor
ataaut
lwa?Ronawagor
ata
babe.
”
Shelookedathimt henblushedturni
ngawayand
goti
nt hehouseclosingthedoorbehindher
.He
smil
edandst ar
tedt hecarthendroveawaywit
ha
hugesmi l
e.

TWOWEEKSLATER.
Li
keandcommentassoonasy
our
eadt
hei
nser
tso
wecanhaveourbonuses
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#58

TwoWeeksLat
er…

Maatl
awal
kedi
nsidet
hedoctor
’sof
ficei
nhis
uni
for
mthenl
ookedatEsi
alr
eadyly
ingonthebed.
“
Sor
ryIam l
ate.
”
Thegynaesmi
l
ed.“
Ohnoi
t’
sok,
wehav
ejustgot
ten
st
art
ed.”
Hest oodbyEsi’
ssideandtri
edtouchi
ngherhand
butshesnatcheditaway.Heswallowedandsighed
star
ingatthescreenwherehecouldseehisbaby
mov i
ngwhi l
ethedoctordi
dthescan.
“
Ok,
ther
eshei
s…”
Maat
lasmi
l
edst
ari
ngathi
sli
tt
legi
rl
.
“
Andt
her
eisherhear
tbeat
.”
Esi
emot
ional
l
ysmi
l
ed.“
Wow!
”
Thedoct
ornodded.“Yeah…Iwill
pri
ntoursome
pi
ctur
esbutsheisperfect
lyf
ine.
”
“
Iwasjustwor
ri
edbecauseshedoesn’
tmov
eso
much.
”
Thedoctorwi
pedthegeloffherbel
ly.“
Wel
lbabi
es
aredi
ff
erent
,somebabiesarejustl
azy.
”
Maatl
atouchedherbel
l
ywi
thasmi
l
ethent
hebaby
moved.
“
Shej
ustmov
ed.
”
Thedoctorsmi
l
ed.“
May
beshecansenseher
fat
her
.”
MaatlarubbedEsi
’
sbel
l
ythenki
ssedi
t.“
Hey
pr
incess…”
EsisighedthensatuprightthenMaat l
atookoffhi
s
hand.Shepi ckedupherdr essandputiton.I
t
str
etchedov erherbumpt henwr appedit
sel
faround
herhips.Shewasget ti
ngmor esexi
erbytheday.
Sheputonherf l
ipfl
ops.
“
Sowhaty
ousai
disal
lIneedt
odo?
”
Thedoct
ornoddd.“
Yes,
Icangot
hroughagai
n-“
“I
t’
snotmyfaul
theislat
e.Iam goi
ng.Ihav
e
somewher
etobe,thankyousomuchDoc. ”
“
Ok,
nextt
ime.
”
Sheputonhersunhatandwal
kedout
.Maat
la
qui
ckl
yfol
lowedafterher
.
“
Hey
…”
Shei
gnor
edhi
m wal
ki
ngt
ohercar
.
“
Canwet
alkbabe?
”Hehel
dherhand.
Sheangr
il
ytur
nedt
ohi
m.“
Whyar
eyout
ouchi
ng
me?”
Maat
laqui
ckl
yletgo.“
Canwet
alk?
”
“
Ihav
enot
hingt
osayt
oyou.
”
Sheproceededt
othepar
kingl
ot.Maat
lawal
ked
besi
deher.
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
Sheunl
ockedhercart
hengoti
nsi
de.
“
Iswear
-“
“
Ify
ouar
enotr
eadyt
otel
lthet
rut
htheny
ouandI
hav
enothi
ngtodiscusssopl
easest
epawayf
rom
mycar,
Ihavesomewheretobeandyouar
edel
ayi
ng
me.”
“Iam sorrybutthechi l
di snotmine.Notbiol
ogical
l
y,
sheisnot .Ihadanaf fairwithBofel
oforashort
whileandIj usttookupt heresponsibi
l
ityofbei
ng
herfather.Iknowi t’
shar dtobeli
evebutIam ti
redof
l
y i
ng.Icant akey outothem both.Wewi ll
runDNA
testsandev eryt
hingy ouwantt oknow.Ihavenot
sleptwithBof el
oi nalongwhi l
eIswear.Ihavebeen
supporti
ngSapphi reonl
y .
”
Esil
ookedathi
mforawhi
l
e.Heswal
l
owedst
ari
ng
ather
.
“
Wher
edoesshest
ay?
”
“Shestay
sMahalapye,Iaskedhertotaket
he
morningbusandtheyhavearri
ved.Theyar
eatBus
Rank.
”
“
Soy
oubr
oughty
oursi
dechi
ck?
”
“
IwantedyoutoseeherandthenwetakeSapphir
e
t
othehospit
alsowecandoDNAt est
s.Idon’twant
t
oloseyou.ImessedupbabebutIwouldnever
disr
espectyout othestageofhavingachil
doutsi
de
ourmar r
iage.Let’
sgoandt akethem atBusRank,
from t
herewegot othepri
vatecli
nicandrunDNA
test
s.”
“
Iwi
l
ldr
ivemy
sel
f.
”
“
Mycari
sov
ert
her
e.”
HerushedtohiscarthendrovetoBusRankwhi l
e
shefoll
owedbehindhim.Hestoppedatatraffi
c
l
ightthenEsi
stoppedbehindhim.Acarstopped
besi
dehersasthedriverr
oll
eddownhiswi ndow.
“
Crybaby
!”
Esi
tur
ned,
herj
awdr
oppedasshest
aredatSean.
“
Sean?
”
Hesmiledt
akingof
fhiscaphershowi
nghert
hat
beaut
if
ulsmil
eofhis.
“
War
eng?
”
Sheshy
lysmi
l
ed.“
Wow…”
Thepassengerhewaswithl
eanedov
erst
ari
ngat
Esit
hensmi l
edasEsif
rowned.
“
Heismybr
other
,don’
tmi
ndhi
m.Letmecal
lyou
l
ater
.”
Shel ookedaheadandsawMaat last
aringthough
themi rrorbeforecall
ingouthernumbert oSeanwho
winkedatherdr i
vingoffoffinhiswhiteRange
Rov erVelarwithhi
snamewher ethenumberpl ate
wassupposedt obe.EsilookedatMaat l
acall
inghe
thensi ghedignori
ngt hecallti
ll
theyreachedatBus
Rank.Esi par
kedbesi dehim andwaitedsitt
inginher
car.Maat laopenedt hepassengerdoor .
“
Whowast
hat
?”
“Who?Maatl
aIwanttogosomewher
e,gogetyour
gir
lf
ri
endbef
oreIl
eav
e.Idon’
thav
eti
mef ort
his.
”
Helookedatherthenclosedt
hedoorand
di
sappearedbetweencarsasherphoner
ang.She
fr
ownedpi cki
ngtheunsavednumber.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Arey
oust
il
lmar
ri
ed?
”
Esi
smi
l
edl
i
steni
ngt
ohi
sdeepv
oice.“
Yes.
”
“
Kant
elet
sakaemokgwawagonal
emot
hooone
f
ormor ethan5y ear
s,gat
wer onaredir
ejang
yaanong?(Wheredoy ougett
hebehav i
orofstay
ing
withonepersonformorethanfiv
ey ear
s,whatare
wesupposedr odonow? )
”
Shel
aughed.“
Shee?
”
“
Someofusal
sowantchances.
”
“
Youar
ecr
azy
.”
“
Howhav
eyoubeen?
”
“
Uh.
.fi
ne.
”
“
What
’swr
ong?
”
“
Wit
hwhat
?”
“
Youhesi
tat
edbef
oresay
ingf
ine.
”
“
NoIdi
dn’
t.
”
“
Yesy
oudi
d,wher
eisKenny
?”
“
Shei
sout
.”
“Well
nowy oucanst
opcr
ying.Tel
lmet
het
rut
h,how
haveyoubeen?”
Esi
sighedt
ear
ful
l
y.“
Myhusbandi
scheat
ingorI
thi
nkheisandhehasachi
l
doutt
her
ethoughhei
s
sti
l
ldeny
ingit
.”
“
That
’sf
uckedup!
”
“
AndIam pr
egnantont
opofi
t.
”
“
Howmanyki
dsdoy
ouhav
e?”
“
Thi
sonewi
l
lbemyt
hir
d.”
“
Howdoy
ouknowhei
scheat
ing?
”
Esi
nar
rat
edt
hewhol
est
oryt
ohi
m.
“
Hei
spr
obabl
yly
ing.
”
Esi
wipedawayhert
ear
s.“
Hei
s.”
“Andhei snotgoi
ngt oadmi ttoit
,thatchildis
probabl
yhisandhei spr obabl
ystil
lfuckingt hebaby
mama.I fhewantedt ostop,hewoul dhav et ol
dyou
aboutthatchi
ld,t
hef actthathedidn’tandy ounever
suspectedanythi
nggav ehimt hegoaheadt okeep
fucki
ngher.Hepr obablyhasmor ekidst here,i
t’
sa
famil
y.Theotherwomanknowsabouty ou.”
“
Tlher
rawenadon’
tsayt
hat
.Thatwouldbreakme.I
l
ovemyhusbandsomuch.Ihav
egiventhatman
ev
ery
thi
ngIcanev
ergi
ve.
”
“Menaredesigneddif
fer
entl
y,wecanhandl etwo
oneti
me, i
maginehisegoknowingheli
terall
yhas
twowives…butatthi
sstage,heseemslikeat op
dogwheni tcomestolyi
ngsohewi l
ldoev ery
thi
ng
tomakey oubeli
eve.
”
“
Hesaidhehasbr
oughtthewomanwi
tht
hechi
l
d,
wear
egoingtot
oDNAt ests.
”
“Wher
e?GotoBokamoso,Ihav
eaf
ri
endt
her
e,Iwi
l
l
cal
lhi
m sohedoesi
tfory
ou.”
Esi
lookedatMaat
lawal
ki
ngbackwi
thawomanand
achil
d.
“
Hei
scomi
ng,
Bokamosor
ight
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Ok.By
e.”
Shehungupt hensteppedoutoft hecarasMaatla
approached.Esilookedatthewoman, t
herewas
real
lynothi
ngspeci alabouther
,infact
,shewasbuilt
l
ikeanimpr operfract
ionormay beitwasjustherbi
g
breast
.Shel ookedatt hechi
ldbutther
ewasnot hi
ng
thatpoi
ntedMaatlatoher
.Al
lofherki
dssli
ght
ly
l
ookedlikeherhusbandbutt
hisonenotev
ena
singl
ebit.
“Iwi
ll
ridewi
tht
hem.Let
’sgot
oBokamosopr
ivat
e
hospi
tal.
”
“
What
?”
“
Yes.Geti
n…”
Esigotbackinhercart
henBofel
oandherdaught er
gotinattheback.Maat
laopenedthepassenger
door.
“
Ihadbookedanappoi
ntmentf
orusat
-“
“Wear
egoingt
oBokamoso,t
her
eissomeoneI
knowt
her
e.Hewil
lat
tendt
ous.”
Maat
lasl
owlynoddedthenEsist
art
edthecarand
r
ever
sed.Shej
oinedtheroadanddr
oveoff
.
“
Didy
ounowhewasmar
ri
ed?
”
“
Yes.Iam so-
“
“
Youcan’
tbesor
ry,
notwheny
oucont
inuedsl
eepi
ng
wi
thhi
m.”
“
Ihav
en’
tseenhi
minal
ongt
ime.
”
Esitur
nedtoher,t
hev
oicewasn’tt
heoneshehad
heardovert
hephonebutofcausethephoneal
ways
madepeoplesoundali
ttl
edif
fer
ent.Shetur
nedback
totheroaddri
vi
ng.
“
Whenl
astdi
dyouseehi
m?”
“Lastyear
,hehadonl
ybr
oughtSapphi
re’
sChr
ist
mas
clot
hes.”
“
Iam goi
ngtosueyouforhomewr ecking.Youmust
t
hinksl
eepi
ngwithmarri
edmeni saj oke.Iam goi
ng
t
omakey ouregr
eti
t,waitandwatch.”
Bofel
olookedather,herhear
tpoundi
ngt
henpul
l
ed
herdaught
ercloser
.

*
**

Tshenol
osatonherdeskr ereadi
ngherlet
terof
employment.Shesighedknowingthedeadli
neto
emailt
hem backwast oday.Shetookherphoneand
cal
ledKennyleani
ngbackonherchai r
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
Tshenol
osmi
l
ed.“
Hi,
canIspeakt
omama?
”
“
Oh…mama!
”
“
Hey
…”
“
Wai
tset
hisboyi
ssosmar
t.
”
“
Mma!Hedoesn’tacthi
sage,j
ustmoment
sagoI
wasbei
ngquest
ionedaboutt
hebaby.
”
“
Whatbaby
?”
“KanaRonatel
lsthi
schildthi
ngs,gat
weIam
carry
inghi
sli
tt
lebrotherorsi
steri
nmybell
y,he
l
iter
all
ydoesever
y t
hingformebecauseIam
pregnant
.”
Tshenol
ofr
owned.“
Youar
epr
egnant
?”
“
No!ButImayhav
eki
ndofsor
tofsl
eptwi
thRona.
”
“It
houghtyouwer
efocusi
ngony
our
sel
ftr
yingt
o
getajob.
”
“
Iam buthecaughtmeoffguardgapenopayafi
ve
y
ear
sl eyoneebothoko.I
maginebei
nghornyf
orfi
ve
y
ear
s.”
Tshenol
olaughed.“
Youar
etr
icky
.Di
dyouuse
prot
ecti
onthough?”
“NobutIwentandgottested.Ronaal
sowentand
hesentmehisresul
ts.It
ookt heemer
gencypi
ll
sbut
j
ustthatRonaei
sh..
”
“IgotajobinMaun.Atahot el
neartheri
ver.Abig
hotelandtheyareoff
eringmetimesthr
eemysal ary
ri
ghtnow.Theyal sooff
ermesomebenef i
ts,l
ike
rental
sandstuffli
kethat.
”
“
Wow!Congr
atul
ati
ons!
”
“
Iknow, Ican’
tbeli
eveit
.WhenIwalkedoutoft
he
i
nter
view,IthoughtIhadfl
oppedbut…”
“
Whenar
eyougoi
ng?
”
“Ihaven’
trespondedt
othem andt
odayi
sthel
ast
day.”
“
Ok,
sowhat
’swr
ong?
”
“
Myf
ami
l
yKenny
.”
“
Eish…”
“
See?Ihav
en’
ttol
dKgosi
.”
“
What
?Why
?”
“
BecauseIam scar
edofwhathewi
l
lsay
.Iwantt
o
t
akethejob.
”
“
Whatifheactual
l
ysuppor
tsy
oui
nitt
henmov
es
wi
thy
ouandt hekids?
”
“
Idon’
tknow,
Iam scar
ed.
”
“Youshoul
dtel
lhim.I
fthej
obisgoodthenwhynot
.
Iam sti
l
lher
etr
yingtoappl
yforj
obsbuttherei
s
nothi
ng.Noonewantstohi
reanexconvict
.”
“
Iam sor
ryf
ri
end.
”
“I
t’
sokbutthepointi
sthatyoushoul
dtel
lhi
m,t
ell
hi
m andtakeitf
rom t
here.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Iam i
nMaun,hadwentforani
ntervi
ewandt
hey
t
oldmether
eandther
ethatIdi
dn’tgeti
t.
”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Yah…l
etmedr
ivehome.
”
“
Can’
tRonahi
rey
ou?
”
“Idon’
twanttomixbusi
nessandpleasure.Iwantto
standonmyown.Iwast hi
nki
ngstarti
ngagar den.A
gardenful
lwit
hfl
owersandstuf
f,aplacewher e
peoplecanhaveweddi
ngs,ev
entsandwhatnot .”
“Thatcanwor
kbutnowadayspeopl
ehav
ethei
r
parti
esint
hei
rbackyar
d.”
“Onl
ybr okepeopledot hat.Peoplewi t
hmoney ,
peoplewhowantbi gweddi ngsbookpl aces.Ihave
beenspendi ngsomucht i
meonf acebookand
Inst
agram, ever
yweeksomeonei shav ingaparty,
someonei scelebr
at i
ngsomet hing.Iftheplaceis
beauti
ful,t
heywillcome.”
“
Ok,
buty
ouneedmoney
.”
“
Iwi
l
lappl
yforf
undi
ngatCEDA.
”
“
Wow,
youseem t
oknowwhaty
ouwant
.”
“
Yes,
Icanal
readyseei
t,Kenny
’sGar
dens!
”
“
OkKenny
,letmegetbackt
owor
k.”
“
Bye.
”
*
**

I
nMaun,Kennyst
eppedoutwit
hQatamal
lthen
hel
dhi
shandastheywal
kedinsi
de.
“
Whenar
ewegoi
ngt
oseedaddy
?”
“
Youmi
sshi
m?”
“
Yes.Weshoul
dgohome.
”
Kennyspot
tedMothusi
whowaswal
ki
ngov
erwi
tha
smil
ethensmil
ed.
“
Hey
…”
Hehuggedhert
ight
lyt
henl
etgo.“
Whatar
eyou
doi
nghere?
”
“
Icamef
orani
nter
view.
”
Hesmi
l
edhol
dingherhand.“
Didy
ougeti
t?”
“
No.Appar
entlyt
heywant
edsomeonewi
thatl
east
t
woyearsexperi
ence.
”

*
**
Nanaowal kedfrom KFCholdingherKr usherthen
fr
ownedst ari
ngatMot husi
smi lingwit
hal adyanda
chil
d.Herheartpoundedsomuchast earsfil
l
edher
eyeswhilehehuggedheragai n.Henev erlookedat
herthewayhewasl ooki
ngatt hatwoman.She
angri
lywalkedov ert
othem takingthelidoffher
Krusherandsplasheditonthewoman’ sface.
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngwi
thmyman?
”
.
.
Likeandcommentassoonasy our
eadt
heinsertdo
wecanhav eanot
herbonusbef
oret
heeveni
nginser
t
famil
y
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#59

Kennygaspedsteppingbackast hest
rawber
ry
Krusherdri
ppeddownherf acetoherwhit
eshir
t
goingdownt oherbl
uepant s.Ql
ookedathis
mot hert
henstoodinfr
ontofNanao.
“
Idon’
tli
key
ou.Whydi
dyoudot
hatt
omymom?
”
“
Ket
agocl
apawena!
”
Mothusipull
edherback.“
Whatt
hef
uckdoy
out
hink
youaredoing?”
“
Who’
sshe?
”
“Sheisanol
dfr
iend,
Ican’
tbel
i
evey
oudi
dthi
sto
her.
”
Mot husiwal
kedovertoKennyt ohelpherbutshe
steppedback.“Iam fi
ne.Iappreci
ateally
ouhave
beendoi ngbutIt
hinkourfr
iendshi
pwi l
lcausemore
harmt hangood.Bye.”
“
Whoi
sshet
oyou?
”Nanaoscr
eamedasaf
ew
peopl
ewat
ched.
“
Youar
epi
ssi
ngmeof
f.Got
othecar
!”
“
Soy
ouar
echeat
ingonme?
”
“
Iwil
lslapyoui
nfr
ontoft
hesepeopl
e,got
othecar
wantena!”
Acriwdstart
edt ogat heraspeoplet
ookoutthei
r
phones.Kennyqui ckl
yt ur
nedwithhersonthenthey
walkedbacktot heircar.Kennyr
eachedforher
handbagandt ookoutt hewetwipesthenwipedher
facetaki
ngoffthemakeup.
“
Sor
rymama.
”
Kennylookedathim wit
hasmile.“
It’
sok.
”She
reachedforherbl
azerbehi
ndherthenputi
ton
coveri
ngthehugestain.
“
Let
’sgoandgetf
oodt
hengohome.
”
“
Todaddy
?”
Kennyl
ookedathi
mthenchuckl
ed.“
No.To
mmama. ”
“
Ok.Whenar
ewegoi
nghome?
”
“Soon.
”Theysteppedoutoft
hecart
henwal
ked
backinsi
dethemall.
“
Soonl
i
ket
omor
row?
”
“
Bat
hongQ,
justsoon.Iwi
l
ltel
lyou.
”
“
Don’
tyouki
ssdaddy
?”
Shesi
ghed.“
Idomyboy
.Whatdoy
ouwantt
oeat
?”
Kennyt
ookoutherr
ingi
ngphonef
rom herbagt
hen
answer
edacall
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hi,
ist
hisKenei
l
weLaol
ang?
”
“
Yes.Thi
sisshe.
”
“Wearecal
li
ngfr
om WoodsTransandLogi
sti
cs.
Youhavebeencal
ledf
orani
nterv
iewthedayaft
er
tomor
row.”
“
Uhhi
sitt
heonei
nKasane?
”
“
Yes.Wi
l
lyoubeabl
etocome?
”
“
Yesmam,
Iwi
l
l,t
hanky
ou.
”
“
Youar
ewel
come.
”
Kennysmi l
edhangi
ngupwithahugesmi
l
eonher
face.Herhear
twasevenpoundi
ng.

*
**

Mothusi
lookedatNanaoast
heysati
nthecar
.“I
can’
tbel
iev
ey oudi
dthat
.”
Nanaot
ear
ful
l
ylookedathi
m.“
Idi
dn’
tknow.
”
“
Youcoul
dhav
easked.
”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“Andwhyonear
thwouldIfuckencheatony
ouwhen
Icametopi
ckyouupinthesamemal l?”
Tear
srol
leddownNanao’scheeks,
Mothusishook
hi
sheadthenstar
tedthecaranddr
oveherback
home.Heparkedbythegate.
“
Arey
ounotcomi
ngwi
th?
”
“
No.Ihav
etogobackt
owor
k.”
“
Buty
ousai
d-“
“
Somet
hingcameout
.Pl
easest
epoutoft
hecar
.”
“Iam sorr
ythatIspl
ashedherwiththeKrusher.
Pleaseforgi
veme.Iwasnotthinki
ngstrai
ght.Iam
sorry.
”
“
Nanao-
“
Nanaocl
imbedovert
oandsatonhi
slap.“
Iam sor
ry.
I
twill
nev
erhappenagai
n.”
“Ihavenev ercheat
edony ouandIam notgoingt
o
startnow.Youembar rassedKennyfornogood
reason.Imaginewhatshei sthi
nki
ngrightnow…t
hat
Ihav eaninsecuregir
lf
ri
end.”
“Sor
ry.Iam real
l
ysorr
y.Itwil
lnev
erhappenagai
n.
JustthatIl
ov ey
ouandwhenIsawy ouwi t
hherI
j
ustlostit
.Iam sor
rybaby.”
Hesighedthenkissedher
.“It
’sok.Ihav
eameet i
ngI
havetoatt
end,theyareal
readywaiti
ngforme.St
ep
outofthecar.
.”
“
Ok,
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Shegotof
fhi
mthenst
eppedoutoft
hecarandt
ook
herthi
ngsf
rom theboot
.Mothusidrov
eoffassoon
asNanaowalkedinsi
dethehouse.Hetookouthi
s
phoneandcal
ledKenny.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,Iam sor
ryaboutwhathappened.
”
“I
t’
sok.Ithinkweshouldjustst
ickt
obeing
stranger
s.Idon’
twanttocauseunnecessar
y
argumentsinyourr
elat
ionship.
”
“That
’snotwhatourf
ri
endshi
piscausi
ng.Nanao
andIalr
eadyhavesomeprobl
ems.”
“
Idon’
twantt
oaddmor
eint
othem.
”
“
Comeon…y ouar
enot.I
treall
yfeel
snicehavi
ng
y
ouasafri
endandjustt
alktoyou.Idon’
twantto
l
oset
hat
.”
“
Mot
husi
-“
“
Please…whenar
eyougoi
ngback?
”
“
Rightnow.
”
“
Ok.Youwil
lfi
ndsomet hi
ng,
don’
tlosehope.And
myoff
eri
sstil
lther
e.”
“
Ok,
thanky
ou.
”
“
Wast
haty
ourson?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Arey
oubackwi
thhi
sfat
her
?”
“
Uhno.
”
“
Ok,
Iwi
l
lcal
lyoul
aterwheny
ouar
ri
ve.
”
“
Shar
p.”
Shehungupt
henhedr
ovebackt
owor
k.

*
**

Apri
lwal
kedinRona’
sof
fi
cehol
dinghert
abl
et.She
tookadeepbreat
h.
“
Youcal
l
edme.
”
“
Sitdown.
”
Apri
l
’sheartst
art
edpounded.Hehadn’tsai
d
anyt
hingaboutherr
elat
ionshi
pwithAt
sileasyet
.
Ronaleanedbackonhischairst
ari
ngather.She
t
ookadeepbr
eat
h.
“It
ri
edexplai
ningt oAtsi
-toMr .MotsamaithatI
can’
tgowi t
hhi m butheinsi
sted.Iam r
eall
ysorr
y.I
don’twantt
ol osemyj ob.Myf amil
ydependsonit.I
tol
dhimt ostayaway .Pl
easef or
giveme.”
“
Atsi
l
eismybrot
her,
Iknowhi
m butt
hisi
swor
kand
y
oucan’
tbef
uckingwit
h-“
“
Ibr
okeupwi
thhi
m.Iendedi
t.
”
Hesighed.“Iam goingtol
eti
tsl
idebecausehehas
beggedmet obuti fyoubr
eakupandt hencome
withatt
it
udehere,Iam goi
ngtofir
ey ou.Iwi
ll
just
usethefactthatyouarehavi
ngarelati
onshi
pwi t
h
yoursuperi
or.
”
“
Soy
ouar
e…-
”
“Yes.Hewascrying.I
fyoubreakup,
don’
tbr
ingi
t
here.Idon’
twantdramahere.”
“
Ofcause.Iunder
standand-
“
“
Didy
ousendt
hoseemal
s?”
“
Yesand-
“
Hi
sphonest
art
edr
ingi
ng,hel
ookedatthescr
een
t
hesmil
edpi
cki
ngmotioni
ngsheleav
eshisof
fice.
“
Babe…”
“
Stopcal
l
ingmet
hat
.”
“
Obat
laker
eng?Mor
ati
wa?War
engst
handosame?
”
“
Iam goi
ngf
oraj
obi
nter
viewi
nKasane.
”
Hef
rowned.“
Sof
ar?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Wil
lyougo?
”
“
Yes.Ineedaj
ob.
”
“
Butcan’
tyouf
indany
thi
ngnear
?Kasanei
ssof
ar.
”
“
Iwantt
hisj
obRona.
”
“
AndIgett
hatbut
…whataboutQ?
”
“Iwil
lgetahouset
her
eandhecanv
isi
tdur
ing
holi
days.
”
“
Hei
sexci
tedaboutusbecomi
ngaf
ami
l
y.”
“Whatarey
ousayi
ng?Ar
eyousay
ingIshoul
dsay
nototheoff
er?
”
“
No.Iam j
ustconcer
ned,
that
’sal
l
.”
“
Aboutwho?Your
sel
f?”
“Aboutourson.He’
sjustgoty
ouandnowy
ouar
e
goingsofar.
”
“
Hecanst
aywi
thme.Ther
ear
eschool
sinKasane.
”
Ronasighed.“
CanIhel
py oufi
ndsomethi
ngmay be
herei
nGabs?Youcancomeandj oinmehere.Iwil
l
off
eryoutimes2whatevert
heywil
lgi
veyouormor e.
Whateveryouwant
.”
“
Idon’
twantt
omi
xbusi
nesswi
thpl
easur
e.”
“Thi
sisnotmixi
ngbusi
nessandpl
easure,
itwil
lbea
j
ob,aproperj
ob.Babepl
ease…keagokopa…what
doyouwantmet odo?Isthi
smypunishment?
”
“
Noonei
spuni
shi
ngy
ouRona.
”
“Thenpleasedon’
tgother
e.Pl
easecomeback…I
willgi
veyouwhatevery
ouwant.Iwi
llgi
veitt
oy ou.
Please…Iam beggi
ngyou.Youwil
lhaveyourown
offi
ce,youcanevengetaPAifyouwant.Anyt
hing.
”
“
Rona-
”
“Keagokopababe…whatdoyouwantmetodo
Kenny?Pl
easetel
lmewhatIshoul
ddotoshowyou
howseri
ousIam.”
“
Ial
readyt
oldt
hem Iam comi
ngf
orani
nter
view.
”
“Thentel
lthem y
ouhav
echangedy
ourmi
nd.
Please…”
“
It
’sgoi
ngtobeunpr
ofessi
onalwor
kingf
ory
ou.I
j
ustwantt
ostandonmyown. ”
“
Wewi
l
lkeepi
tpr
ofessi
onal
atwor
k.Pl
easebabe…”

*
**

Latert
hatdayEsi
layont
hecoucht
alki
ngonher
phone.
“Iunderst
andyouareangrybutcomeon, whatdi
d
youwanthert osay
?It’
snoteasyt otel
lafr
iendt
hat
hey,yourhusbandwascheati
ng.Woul dyouhave
tol
dherhadshebeeni nyourplace?”
Shekeptqui
ett
henSeanl
aughed.“
See?
”
“Idon’
tknow,
IguessIam j
usthur
tfort
hef
actt
hat
sheknew.”
“Shetoowoul dn’thav eknownwhatt odoand
i
magi nehertell
ingy out henyoufixthingswithyour
husband,aft
ert hatyourhusbandhat esher.Giv
eher
abreak,sheisfr om jail
,sheneedsy ouasaf ri
end
notforyoutogi veheracol dshoulder.
”
“
Ok,
Iguessy
ouar
eri
ght
.”
“
Iam.Sowhatar
eyougoi
ngt
odoi
fhei
snott
he
f
ather
?”
“
Idon’
tknow.
”
“
Youshoul
dknow.Thi
nkabouti
t.Ther
eisachance
t
hathemayberi
ghtand-
“
“Hey,
ther
eisani
ncomi
ngcal
l
.Letmecal
lyou
back.
”
“Ok,Ihav
ebeenwant
ingtgott
othet
oil
etbutIwas
holdi
ngmy sel
f.
”
Esi
laughedt
henhunguppi
cki
ngt
hei
ncomi
ngcal
l
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hi,
am It
alki
ngt
oMoesi
Mot
samai
?”
“
Yes.HowcanIhel
pyou?
”
“
Thi
sisabouty
ourhusband.Iam Bof
elo’
sbr
other
.”
“
Whatdoy
ouwant
?”
“Tel
lyourhusbandt
ostayawayf
rom mysist
er,Iam
watchi
nghim, hi
ski
ds…someonewil
lgethur
tifhe
keepsharassi
ngher
.”
“
Whatar
eyout
alki
ngabout
?”
“Justtell
himtowatchhi
sbackbecauseIwil
lhur
t
him whereithur
tsthemost
.Hecan’tgi
vemysist
er
threekidsandsti
ll
havet
hegutst
olayhishandson
her.”
Esi
swallowed.“
Thr
eeki
ds?Whydi
dshebr
ingone
onl
ytoday?”
“
Bri
ngt
hem wher
e?”
“HebroughtawomannamedBofel
otodaywit
ha
chil
dsowedoDNAt est
sbecausehesaysi
t’
snot
hischi
ld.
”
“
Yourhusbandi
sabi
gli
ar.Hehast
woki
dswi
thmy
si
sterandshei
spr
egnantwi
tht
het
hir
done.
”
“
What
?”
“
Thr
eeki
ds.Iwi
l
lsendy
out
hei
rpi
ctur
es.
”
Hehungup, minut eslatersheopenedt hepictures.
Tear sfil
l
edherey esasshel ookedatt hepictures,
onebyone.Nowshecoul dseet heresemblance, the
kidslookedjustlikehi m.Tear sroll
eddownher
cheeksasshesatt hereforal ongwhi l
eunablet o
evencr youtloudasherent irebodygotweak.She
fi
nallygather
edt hest rengthtost and,shetooka
stept henfr
ownedassomet hingroll
eddownher
thigh.Shelft
edherdr essandl ookedatt heblood.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#60

Esipanickedst
ari
ngatthebloodthent
urnedbackt
o
thecouchwher east
ainwas.Withherheart
pounding,shequi
ckl
ypickedherphoneand
answered.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,so-
“
“
SeanIam bl
eedi
ng.
”
“
What
?”
“
Iam bleedi
ng.Ishoul
dn’
tbebl
eedi
ng.Somet
hingi
s
wrong.
”
“
Shi
t!Cany
oudr
ivet
othehospi
tal
?Iwi
l
lmeety
ou
t
her
e.”
“
Ok.
”
Esipi
ckedthecarkey
sthenhurr
iedout.Shestar
ted
hercarpr
essingt
hegate’
sremotethendroveout
speedi
ngtothehospi
tal
.Herphonerangasshe
dr
ovethr
ought
her
edr
obot
.Shei
gnor
edi
tti
l
lshe
ar
ri
ved.

*
**

AtAtsi
l
e’shouse,Maatl
aheldhisphonedi al
i
ngEsi
agai
nbutshestil
lwasn’
tpi
cking,notthatsheever
pi
ckednowadaysbuthadn’theclear
edt he
conf
usionout?Atsi
l
esatbesidehim stari
ngathi
m.
“
Didshebuyi
t?”
“
Yes.
”
“Howdi
dsheev
en…”Hesi
ghed.“
Howmanypeopl
e
didy
oupay
?”
“
Iam noti
nthemoodf
ort
his.
”
“Ofcauseyouar enot.Youwillprobabl
ynev erbein
themoodf oritbecauseyouknowy oufuckedup.
Howdoy ouhavet wokidsoutsideyourmarr i
age
andstil
lcont
inuelikenothi
nghappened?Youal ways
preachedaboutloyalt
y,abouthowf uniti
stohav e
onewomanwhom y ouwouldgi veever
ythi
ngt o.I
al
way slookedupt oy ou.Peopl
emakemi st
akes,
Sapphir
ewast hatmistakebutDiamond?Youhave
di
sappointedme, Idon’tthi
nkIwill
everl
ist
entoa
si
nglewor dyousaybecausey ousayandpreach
whatyoudon’ tpract
ice.”
Maat l
alookedathi mt hensighed.“IknowI
disappoi ntedyou,ev enRona.Ofcausehedoesn’ t
sayany t
hingany mor ebutIknowhei sdisappointed.
IwishIknewhowt omakei tallri
ghtwi t
houtlosing
myf amily.Ihavegot tensodeepi ntoitt
hatIam i n
l
ov ewi thbot hwomen.Iwantt oraisemyki dsand
bet heref orallofthem butit’
sr eall
ydiff
icul
twhenI
am busyhi dingaround. ”
“
May
bey
oushoul
dbehonest
.”
“
Ican’
tlosemywi
fe.
”
“
Don’tyouthinkshei
sgoingtoknowonedayand
wal
kawayf orgood?Itwoul
dhavebeenbett
eri
fyou
t
oldheryourself
.”
Maatl
asighedt
henst
aredathi
sphonewai
ti
ngf
or
Esi
topick.
*
**

Atthehospit
al,Seanwaitedbyt hewait
ingareaas
thedoctor
sat t
endedt oEsi.Heleanedback,
his
handsonhisheadashewonder edhowshewas
doing.Hesti
lldi
dn’tunderstandwhyanyonewoul d
hurtthesweetestpersonhehadev ercameacr oss.
Shewasper fecti
on.
Hi
sphonei
nhi
spocket
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
Iam busy
.Wewi
l
ltal
ktomor
row.
”
“
Youar
egoi
ngt
omi
sst
he-
“
“
Iknow,
Iam busy
,let
’st
alkt
omor
row.
”
“
Whoar
eyouwi
th?
”
“I
t’
snonofy
ourbusi
ness.Youar
etoonoseyf
ory
our
gender
.”
“
Youar
etheonewhoi
sneededf
ort
hismi
ssi
on,
if
y
oudon’
tdoi
t-“
“Youwil
ldoi
t.Wewi
l
ltal
ktomor
row.Esi
isi
n
hospi
tal
.”
“
Themar
ri
edwoman?
”
Hesighed.“
Yesandit
’snonofy ourbusi
ness.Di
d
yougetanyt
hingonherhusband?”
“
Hei
sasol
dier
.”
“
Ok.Whatel
se?
”
“Youaremessi
ngwi
thasol
dier
’swi
fe!That
’swhat
else.
”
“
Hei
ssmal
lfl
y.
”
“
Thosepeopl
ear
ecr
azy
.”
“
Hewoul
dn’
tmesswi
thme.Iam wayabov
ehi
m.”
“Hei
ssti
llmarri
edt
oher
,can’
tyouj
ustf
ind
someoneelse?
”
“No.Iwanther.Hopefull
ysoonhewon’tbeher
husband.Iam reall
yhappyherui
nedhi
sr el
ati
onshi
p
all
byhimself.Ididn’
tdoanyt
hingsoi
twillbeeasy
totakeher.
”
Hi
sbr
otherhungupt
henheputbackhi
sphonei
n
hi
spocketf
oral
i
ttl
ewhi
l
eget
ti
ngmor
eanxi
ous.

*
**

Latert
hateveni
ngTshenol
olaybesi
deherhusband
aft
erasteamysessi
on.
“
Babe…”
“
What
?”
Shet
ookadeepbr
eat
h.“
Igotaj
obi
nMaun.
”
“
What
?Theyar
etr
ansf
err
ing?
”
“
No,
it’
sanewj
ob.
”
Kgosi
lookedather
.“Anewj
ob?
”
“Yes.Iwantthejob,theyareof
feringsomething
evenbetterthanwhatIam currentlyworki
ngforbutI
don’twanttoleavemyki dsandy ou.Idon’
twantto
l
eav emyf amilybecauseyoumeant heworl
dt ome.”
Kgosiki
ssedher
.“Iwoul
dneverst
andi
nt hemi
ddl
e
ofyougoingf
orwhatyoulov
e,whatmakesyou
happy.WecanalwaysmovetoMaunandeit
herway,
Ihavealwayswantedtomov
eher
e,ther
eisgreat
marketforbusi
ness.
”
Tshenol
osmil
edst
ari
ngatherhusband.“
Youwi
l
l
movewithme?”
“
Yes,
whynot
.”
Tshenol
otear
full
ylookedathi
m.Kgosi
lookedather
thenki
ssedher.
“Wearegoi
ngtost
icktoget
her
.Iwi
l
lopenanot
her
brunchi
nGabor
one.”
Shehuggedhi
mtight
ly.Kgosi
kissedherf
orehead
thengotont
opofherkissi
ngher.

*
**

Thef ol
l
owingmor ni
ng,17yearol
dMi asatinthe
ki
tchenreadingherbooks.30mi nutesl
atershegot
upinhercleanpr operuni
for
mt henpackedher
booksinherbagashermot herwalkedfr
om the
bedroom.Shel ookedather.
“Iwonderwhenyouaregoi ngtouniv
ersi
ty,
The
moneyt her
ewil
lreal
l
yhel pus.Ican’
tbel
ieve
Keneil
wegav emymot herhercarwhenIhermother
i
sstil
lali
ve.
”
Mial
ookedathermothershaki
ngherheadt
hen
gr
abbedherbag.“
Iam goingtoschool
.”
“
Iam goi
ngtocomeandsel
latyourschoolal
teron
t
oday
.Wedon’thavef
oodtoni
ght.Idon’
tknowwhat
wear
egoingoeat.
”
“Maybeit
’st
imeyougi
veKennywhatbel
ongst
oher
.
Iam sur
eshewil
lhel
pyouaft
er.
”
“Ideser
vethatmoney .Iam t
heonewhogotr aped.
Thatmoneyi smine,Ideser
veitforhowIsuff
ered
try
ingtopushherout .Shewastoobigtheyhadto
cutme.IdeservetheMoney .
”
“Wellyouarenevergoingtouseitbecauseyouare
notKeneil
weLaol ang,Idon’
tgetwhyyoudidn’
tjust
abortherinst
eadofgiv i
ngbir
thtoachil
donlyto
hateher.Youarev i
lenowonderGodwon’ tbl
ess
you.”
“
Iwi
l
lsl
apy
oui
fyout
alkt
omel
i
ket
hat
,doy
ouhear
me?
”
“Iam goi
ngtoschool
,soonIam goingt
ogot o
univ
ersit
yandIam goi
ngtoleav
ey ouhere.
”
“
Iam st
il
l-
“
Amanwal kedoutf rom t
hebedr oom,Miashookher
headwal ki
ngoutandwal kedtoschool.Her
stomachgr umbl edasshewal kedtoschool.She
sighedf ocusinghermi ndonherbooks.Shef ound
her sel
fsmi l
ingknowi ngshewoul dbewrit
ingwith
thef or
m 5’st houghshewasst i
lli
nfor
m 4.Her
teacherswer econfi
dentthatshewouldpassandi t
raisedherconf idence.
Theirneighbor’
scarsl oweddownbesidehert henhe
stoppedt hecarroll
ingdownhiswindowst aringat
her.Hershoeswer ealwaysshi
ningandheruni for
m
wascl ean.Shehadsmoot hbeauti
ful
legs,she
turnedandi nnocentl
ylookedathimrespectfull
y.
“
Dumel
ang…”
“
HiMi
a,geti
nkegodr
opekoskol
ong.
”
Shesmi
l
edsur
pri
sedheev
enknewhernamebut
thenshecouldn’
tbethatsurpri
sed,
notwit
htheway
hermot heral
waysscreamedhername.Shewal ked
roundthecarthengotinandsatdownputti
ngher
bagonherl ap.Hedroveoffrol
li
ngupthewindows.
“
Howi
sschool
?”
“
School
isf
ine.
”
“
Arey
oupassi
ng?
”
Mi
asmi
l
ed.“
Eer
ra.
”
“
That
’sgood.
”
Hekeptqui et.Henev erspoket oomuch, outofall
theneighbor sshehadev erhad, hewast hemost
quietest.Shehadhear drumor sabouthisdi vor
ce
from theprost i
tutehermot herlikedhangingout
wi t
h.Mi asighedl ookingoutt hewi ndowt henhe
turnedt oherst eali
ngagl ancebef or
eturningback
tother oad.Mi nit
esl aterhestoppedt hecarbyt he
gate.
“
Thanky
our
ragweLawr
ence.
”
Helookedatherandlaughed.“
Youcancal
lme
Vi
ctor.Goshar
pMi a.
”
“
Eer
ra.
”
Hedrov
eof
fthenMi
awal
kedi
nsi
det
heschool
gat
es.

*
**

Kennysmi l
eddr ivi
ngintheGabor onestr eets,she
l
ookedatt hebackseatandsmi ledst ari
ngatQ
sl
eepi ng.Hehadbeensl eepingal mostt heent ire
j
our neythoughshecoul dn’tbl
amehi m.Maunt o
Gabor onewasqui teadistance.Shel ookedatt he
ti
medr iv
ingtohi scompanypl ayingCel ineDi on,I
droveal lni
ght.Thesonghadkeptherawakeasshe
drovet ogetherwiththecansofener gydr i
nks.She
sl
oweddowndr iv
ingint
ot hepar kinglott henfinall
y
parkedhercar .Shesteppedoutpul l
ingdownher
bondagedr ess,shetookherhandbagandcat walked
i
nsidet hebui l
ding.

*
**
Lesangpull
eddownhershor tdresst
henwalked
i
nsidethebuidi
nggoingt
ot herecept
ionweari
ngher
fl
atpumps.Shesmiledattherecepti
onist
.
“
Hi,
canIseey
ourboss?
”
Therecepti
onistf
rownedcatchi
ngtheawful
smel
l
thenmov edback.“Ourboss?Doyouhavean
appoi
ntment?”
“
It
’si
mpor
tant
,Ical
l
edhi
m andhei
sexpect
ingme.
”
Ronawal
kedi nhol
dinghi
slapt
opbagandwal
ked
pastt
hem .Lesangranov
erandgoti
ntheel
evat
or
wit
hhim.
Therecepti
oni
stl
ookedatLesangandl
aughedwi
th
hercol
league.
“
Heel
ang!
”
Theyl
aughedev
enhar
der
.
“
Ist
hatapr
ost
it
ute?
”
“
Shel
ooksl
i
keadr
ugaddi
ct,
andt
hatdr
ess?
”
“
Shel
ooksl
i
keshehasHI
V.”
“Bathong,
wait
sebanyana.Ny
aa,
mogi
rlneedst
o
bath.Sheisst
inki
nghel
a.”
“
Isn’
tshet
hegi
rlt
heyweretal
ki
ngabouton
f
acebookt
heot
herday?Theonewagangbang?
”
“
Ithi
nkshei
stheone.
”
Kennyappr
oachedthem hol
dingherson’
shandt
hen
smil
edasQy awned.
“
Ladi
es,
canIseeMr
.A.Mot
samai
.”
“Whoareyou?Doy ouhaveanappoint
ment?Kana
peopl
ecan’tj
ustcomewant i
ngtoseetheboss
whenyoudon’tevenhaveappoi
ntments.
”
Kennysmil
edcal
mlyreadi
nghernameonherbr
east
.
“Ler
ato…Ler
atodoyouknowthisboyher
e?”
Shepoint
edatQ.Ler
atogotupandl
ookedatMr
.
Motsamai’
sSon.
“
Yes.Ar
eyout
henanny
?Youshoul
dhav
esai
dso.
”
“
Iam hi
smot
her
.Wher
eishi
sof
fi
ce?
”
Ler
atoswal
l
owed.“
Thi
rdf
loor
.”
“
Thanky
ou.May
bey
ouneedabr
eakt
olear
nat
hing
ortwoaboutcust omerser
vicebecauseIthi
nkyou
missedthatlessonbackatschool.Thatt
abl
eis
defi
nit
elynotforyoubutIwill
makesur etodi
scuss
i
twithyourboss.”

*
**

I
ntheel
evat
or
“
Hi.
.”
Ronasi
ghedannoy
ed.“
Thef
uck?
”
Tear
sfil
ledherey
es.“Iam sor
ryforj
ustbudgi
ngi
n
l
iket
his.Ij
ustwantedtot
alktoyou.”
Theel
evat
orDooropenedt
hent
heyst
eppedout
.
Ronal
ookedather
.
“
Whatdoy
ouwant
?”
LesanglookedatthePAt
henbackathi
m.“
Canwe
tal
kinyouroffi
ce?
”
“
No.Her
eisf
ine.
”
“Iam nother etoseducey ou.Ij
ustneedy ourhel
p.”
Tearsr andownhercheeks.Ronal ookedather ,i
t
didn’
tev enlookliketheLesangheknew.Thi sone
wasj usttoot hi
nandshewassodar k.Hecouldal
so
catchheawf ulsmel l
comingfrom her.Lesang
l
ookedathi m asher ubbedhernoset henshe
steppedt r
yingtost opcryi
ng.
“
Pleasehel
pme…keagokopa.Ihav
enoonet
otur
n
t
o.”
.
.
Sor
ryf
ami
l
y,Idosedof
f.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#61

Kennyst
eppedoutoft
heelevat
orwit
hhersonthen
Qledhertohi
sdad’
soffi
ce.Kennysmil
edathi
sPA
seat
edonherdesk.
“
Hi.
.”
Apri
lsmil
ed.“
Mrs.Mot
samai
.Iam Apr
il
.Your
husband’
serr
and’
sgi
rl
.”
Kennypausedt
henlaughed.“
Mr s.Mot
samai
ke
mang?(Who’sMrs.Motsamai?)
”
“
Mrs.Motsamai,pleasur
ehavingyouher
e,wow,
y
ourhai
risreal
lylong.Waist
eprisonyat
husa.
(
Pri
sonhelps.
)”
Kennylaughed.“WaswabaApri
l
,warepr
isonedi
ra
eng?(Youwillbesor
ry,
pri
sondoeswhat
? )
”
Apr
ilshr
uggedwi
thasmi
l
e.“
Yourhai
risr
eal
l
ylong.
”
“
Mxm,
wher
eishe?
”
“
Insi
de.Hi
Q…”
Ql
ookedatherandsmi
l
ed.“
Hi…mamal
et’
sgo.
”
Kennyfixedherdr
essasApri
lsmil
edst ar
ingather
bodygoingdownt oherr
edbott
oms, shecouldonly
dream aboutowni
ngapairofChri
sti
anLouboutins.
Kennyopenedthedoort ohisoff
icethenwalkedin
holdi
ngherson’shand.Shepausedst ar
ingatthe
womanseat edopposit
ehimt henwalkedfurtheri
n
putti
ngherhandbagont hedesk.ShelookedatRona
whowasst ari
ngatherwi t
hasmi leofshock.He
stoodupthenhuggedher .
“
Heybabe…”
“
Arey
oubusy
?”
“
No,
Lesangwasj
ustl
eav
ing.
”
Kennytur
nedtotheski
nnywomanwi
thaf
rown,
Lesangsmil
edashamed.
“
Hi…”
Kennyfr
ownedunabl
etorecogni
zeher,
shet
urned
backtoRona.“
Youhavest
artedr
ight
?”
“
Comeon,
Iwas-
“
“Osekawarecomeon, obatagont ena.(
Don’
tsay
comeon, y
ouwanttopissmeof f.)YoufoughtNat
e
thoughhewasjusti
nnocentyetyouar et
hesame
personwhobri
ngsexesinsi
dey ourhouseand
offi
ce.
”
Ronali
ckedhisli
pst henl
ookedatLesang.“
Iam
sor
ry,
Ican’thel
py ou.”
Lesangnoddedt
hent
ookherbagandwal
kedout
tear
ful
ly
.
“
Daddy
,mommydr
oveal
lni
ght
.”
Ronapi
ckedhi
sson.“
Shedi
d?”
“
Yes,
shesai
dwear
ecomi
ngbackhome.
”
Kennypickedherhandbagandwal
kedt
owardsthe
door.Ronaquickl
yputdownQthenpul
l
edherbag
beforeshecouldwalkout
.
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“Obatakelwe( Youwantmet of
ight
)butit
’snot
goingtohappen.Iam notgoingtogobackt oj
ail
becauseofyou, Ibr
oughtQ,hewascr y
ingforyou.
”
“
Babeshej
ustcamer
ightnowand-
“
“
Andt
hat
’sal
way
syourexcuse,
shej
ustcame.
”
“Iam sor
ry.She…“Hesi ghed.“Youarer
ight
,next
ti
meIwon’ tevental
ktoher .Iswear
.Osekawa
ngal
a.(Don’tgetangr
y.)
”
“
Iam notangr
y,l
etgoofme.
”
“
Youar
e…Iam sor
rybabe.
”
“Ronal etgoofmyhand.Iam gladIwal kedi
nont hi
s
sot hatIcantakethejobinKasanewithoutf
eeli
ng
guil
ty.Wal api
saRona( Youareti
ri
ngRona)soIam
goingt ogiveyouspacetodowhat ev
ery ouwant.
”
RonalookedatQwhowasseatedonhi
schai
r
drawi
ngsomet hi
ngonhi
sfi
l
es.Heopenedt
hedoor
thenstuckhi
sheadout
.
“
Apr
il
,comeandgetQ.
”
Apri
lquickl
yst
oodupandwalkedint
heof
fi
cewhi
l
e
RonablockedKennyf
rom l
eav
ing.
“
Q,l
et’
sgo,
Iwantt
oshowy
ousomet
hingcool
.”
Qjumpedof
fthechairhol
dingt
hepen.Apr
ilr
eached
f
orthefi
l
esthathehadwrit
inghi
snameon.
“
Iwi
l
lpr
intt
heseagai
n.”
“
Hol
dmycal
l
s.”
“
Yessi
r.
”
Theybot
hwalkedoutt
henRonal
ockedt
hedoor
st
ari
ngather
.
“
Canwet
alk?
”
“Ihav
enothi
ngtosaytoy
outoday
.Iam notgoi
ngt
o
doanythi
ngtoy
ou.Letmego.”
“Lesangjustcame, shewascr yi
ngdrawingatt
enti
on
soIbr oughtheri nmyof fi
ce.Shehadn’tev
ensaid
anythi
ngwheny ouwal kedi
n.Iam notcheati
ngon
you,Iheldmy selff orthepastfiv
ey ear
seventhough
youwer enotar ound, whywouldIcheatnow?Iam
sorry,
Iwi l
lnevert alktoheragain.”
Heleanedov
ertoki
ssherbutKennymovedher
head,hesmi
ledpul
l
ingherchi
nthenki
ssedher
.
“Iam sor
ryMr.Motsamai
.It
’snev
ergoi
ngt
ohappen
agai
n.Ilovey
ou.”
Shetr
iedt
okeepaseri
ousf
acebuthim smil
ingat
hermadehersmi
l
e.“I
t’
sokbutf
orgetmef i
ghti
ng
wit
hyouwhenIcatchy ouwi t
hanywomani na
compromi
singpositi
on.Iam justgoingtowalkaway
andfi
ndamanwhoact uall
ydeser vesmylove.
Someonewhowi l
llovemet hewayIneedt obe
l
ovedandhewillbefarmuchbet t
erthanyou.”
“Don’ttal
kli
ket
hat,
Isai
dit
’snotgoingtohappen
again.Tlhemmababekeagorat
a.(Ilov
eyoubabe.)
”
Hetookherbaglockingthedoort henthrewitonthe
couchbefor
ekissingheragaingropingherbutt.He
ki
ssedherhardertakingof
fhisjacketthen
unbutt
onedhissleevesandfoldedthem star
ingat
her.
“
Undr
ess.
”
Kennybendedt
otakeof
fherheel
s.
“
Keept
heheel
s…Iwanty
out
obendov
eri
nthem.
.”
Shetookherdressandbraashel ookedathert
hong
wait
ingforhert
ot akei
toffbutshelookedathi
m
taki
ngasweetf r
om herbagandt hr
ewi ti
nher
mouth.
“
Takeof
fthet
hong.
”
Shewal kedovert ohimthenrubbedhi sdi ck
whisperingi
nhi sear.“
Iwanty out ot akei toffthen
bendmeov eranddoal lthenastyt hingst ome.I
wanty outofuckmesohar dti
ll
Ican’ tf eel mypussy,
doitallbecausef r
om hereIam goi ngt otakethat
j
obi nKasane.Iam notgoi ngtowor kf ory ouory our
brot
her ssodoi tall
tome, youarepr obabl y
di
sappoi nt
ed,takeoutyourf r
ustrationonme. ”
Sherubbedhim ev
enmor ethenwentdownonher
kneesstar
ingathi
m.Ronaunzi ppedhispantst
hen
tookouthi
sv ei
nedmonsterofadi ck.Wi
ththebl
ack
hall
sinhermouth,shet
ookhi sdickand…

*
**

Esisl
owlyopenedhereyesatt
hehospit
alfeel
ing
di
sori
ented.Seanl
ookedatherthensmi
ledtaking
herhand.
“
Hey
…”
Esi
touchedherf
latst
omachwi
thaf
rown.“
Wher
eis
mybaby
?”
Seanl
ookedathersadl
y.“
Thedoct
orsai
dyour
bl
oodpressur
ewas-“
Shetr
iedt
ogetupbuthepushedherbag.“
You
shoul
drel
ax.
”
“
WhereismybabySean?Wher eismybaby?
!”She
l
ookedaroundbutshecoul
dn’
tseeany
thi
ng.
“
Thebabydi
dn’
tmakei
t.
”
Esi
shookherhead.“
No.Iwantmybaby
!Wher
eis
mybaby?”
“
Youl
ostt
hebaby
.”
Esishookherheadthengotof
fbedri
ppingof
fthe
dri
pfrom herarm.Seangr
abbedherasshetr
ied
walki
ngoutside.
“Iam sorr
y.Thebabydidn’
tmakei
t.Yourbl
ood
pressurewastoohigh.
”
Esil
ookedathi
m,t
ear
sinherey
es.“
No,
Iwantmy
baby!
”
“
Iam sor
ry.Theyj
ustcal
l
ed-
“
Thedooropenedt
henMaat
lawalkedi
n.Hel
ooked
atSeant
henatEsiwhowascr
ying.
“
Letgoofmywi
fe!
”
Seanl
ethergoasEsi
cri
ed.“
Iwantmybaby
!”
Maatl
asi
ghedsadl
yandt
ri
edt
ouchi
ngherbutshe
movedback.
“
Youki
l
ledmybaby
!”
“
Babe-
“
“Youkil
ledmybaby !Youthi
nkIdon’ tknowthaty
ou
havetwoki dsoutt her
e,t
hethi
rdoneont heway.
Youbroughtt hatfakewomant oli
et ome….how
coul
dy oudot histome?Ididn’teverythi
ngri
ght!
Every
thing!Tellmewher eIwentwr ong!Tel
lme
whereIwentwr ongMaatla!
”
“
Babe-
“
Esimov
edbackcr
ying.“
Idon’tunder
stand.Wher
e
di
dIgowrong?Whatwasmi ssi
ng?”
“
Icanexpl
ain.
”
“
Thr
ee!
”Shehel
dupt
hreef
inger
s.“
Thr
ee!Maat
la
t
hree!Thr
eeMaat
la.
”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Igavethi
smarri
agemyall
.Igav
ey oumyall.Il
oved
you…ri
ghtfr
om t
hebegi
nni
ng,Il
ovedyou.Tellme
whereIwentwr
ong!
”
Heshookhi
sheadstar
ingathercr
ying.“
Tel
lme
wher
eIwentwrong!
”
Painstrangledherasshestaredathim.Thiswas
themanwhom shehadl ov
edf ort
helongestti
me…
herfir
stlove..Godknewshehadl ovedhim somuch,
givenhim herheart
,hersoulandbody.
“
Whatwasmi
ssi
ngMaat
la?Tel
lmewhatwas
missi
ng?
”
“
Not
hing.
”
“
Getout
.”
“
Babe-
“
“
Getout
!Getout
!”Shepushedhi
m.“
GETOUT!
”
Maatl
alookedathersadl
ythenwalkedout
.Sean
l
ookedatherthenpul
ledherinhi
sarmsholdi
ngher
t
ight
lywhi
l
eshecr
ied.
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Heki
l
ledmybaby
..
”
Hehel
dhert i
ll
shefinal
l
ykeptqui
et.Hepickedher
upandplacedheronthebedstar
ingather,t
hepai
n
i
nhereyessov i
sibl
e.
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
Shenoddedast
ear
sdr
oppedt
othepi
l
low.
“
Theyal
readycl
eanedy
ouup.
”
Seanleanedov
erandkissedherf
orehead.“
Iwi
ll
go
andcallt
hedoctorsohecanexpl
aintoyouwhat
happened.”
Seanwal
kedoutt
henMaat
lal
ookedathi
m.
“
Whatdoy
out
hinky
ouar
edoi
ngwi
thmywi
fe?
”
Seanl
ookedathi
m andsmi
l
ed.
“
Ist
hatt
onesupposedt
oscar
emeof
f?”
“
Otl
any
ela.
”
Seanwal
kedcl
osert
ohi
m.“
Iam t
heonet
heycal
l
whent heyneedsomeonet akenout ,bitchIam up
ther
ewi thGodr eadytotoeliminatewhenneededbe.
Iam goodatwhatIdoev ent hepresi dentknowsme.
Goandaskaboutmet heywi l
l t
ellyou.Iwillnotbe
scaredbyadog, andl
etitbet helastt i
mey outalkt
o
melikethat,nexttimeIwil
l cri
ppley ou.”
Seanwalkedpasthi
mleavi
ngMaatl
astar
ingathi
m
unabl
etoshakeoffj
usthowcol
dtheguywas.

*
**

Kennywal kedoutofMot samaiRealEst

ateholdi
ng
herbagwhi leQr aninfrontofher
.Shebravel
y
walkedingnor i
ngthepai nbet
weenherlegsthenshe
gotinthecar .Shelookedbackatthebuil
dingthen
star
tedhercarasherphoner ang.Shefi
sheditout
fr
om herhandbagt henanswered.
“I
fy ougotoKasanewhenIhav
esai
dnoy
ouar
e
goingtoregr
eti
t.”
Kennynaught
il
ysmi
l
edst
ari
ngatt
hebui
l
ding.“
What
areyougoi
ngtodotomet
hatyouhaven’
tal
ready
done?Iam dr
oppi
ngof
fQatEsi
’shouse.
”
Hesighed.“
Ilov
ey ou,
cany
oust
opt
hissowecan
f
ixourrel
ati
onship.
”
“
Ilov
eyourdi
ck.
”
“
Don’
ttestmeKenei
l
we.
”
“
Boyby
e!”
ShehungupasQl
ookedather
.“Wher
ear
eyou
taki
ngme?”
Shet
urnedt
ohi
m andsmi
l
ed.
“Wearegoi
nghome.Iam j
ustmessi
ngwi
thy
our
Dad.
”
Qsmi l
edrel
axi
ngthenKenny’
sphonerangagai
n.
Sheansweredwit
hasmi l
eknowinghewasprobabl
y
l
osingit
.
“
RonaI
-“
“
Hey
…”
“
Esi
?”
“
Ilostmybaby
…”
“
OhmyGod…Iam sosor
ry.
”
“
Maatl
ahast
wokidsoutt
here,
theot
herisont
he
way
.Hehasbeenseei
ngt
hiswomanallal
ong.
.”
“Iknowaboutt
hef
ir
stoneonl
y,t
heot
heronesI
swearIdon’
t.
”
“
Iam r
eal
l
yhear
tbr
oken.Ij
ustwantmybaby
.”
“
Wher
ear
eyou?Iam i
nGabor
one.
”

Atthehospi
tal
,Kennywal
kedwi
thQinsi
deEsi’
s
room.Esibr
okedowncryi
ngasKennywalkedover
,
shehuggedher.
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Hehasbeencheat
ingonme…”
“
Iam sor
ry.I
t’
sgoi
ngt
obeal
ri
ght
.”
Qsadlylookedathisauntt
henEsi
pressedherl
i
ps
t
ogetherwipinghertear
s.“
HeyQ…”
“
Youar
ecr
ying.
”
“
No…Iam j
usthappyt
oseey
ourmom.
”
“Oh…”Hesmiled.“
Iwashappyt
oobutIdi
dn’
tcr
y,
sheisnotgoi
ngany wher
e.”
ThedooropenedthenSeanwal
kedinhol
dingj
uice.
Hiseyesfel
lonKenny,
heswall
owedwhil
ehisheart
ski
pped.Shesmil
edthentur
nedbacktoEsi
whisper
ing.
“
Who’
sthi
sfi
net
hing?
”
Seanclearedhist
hroatandwal
kedover
.Hehanded
Esithejui
cethenl
ookedatKennyagai
ntaki
nginher
beauty.
“
HiKenny
.”
Kennylookedathi
m conf
used.Esi
lookedather
fr
iend.
“
It
’sSean.Theonewhowast
her
ethatni
ght
.”
Kennyl
ookedathim.“OhmyGod…t
heguywhot
old
Iwasn’
tgoi
ngtojail
?”
Seanl
aughed.“Ij
ustwant
edyoutodropt
hegun.
Hadyoudroppedit,
youwoul
dn’
thavegot
tenshot
.”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Wow!
”
“
Yeah,
soy
ouar
efi
nal
l
yout
.”
Shenodded.“
Yes,
it’
sbeenamont
hnow.
”
“
Youdon’
tev
enl
ookl
i
key
ouwer
einpr
ison.
”
Shel
aughed.“
Iwi
l
ltaket
hatasacompl
i
ment
.”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Youshoul
d.”
“
Soy
ouandEsi
-“
“Webumpedi nt
oeachot
heryester
day .Youshoul
d
haveseenthewayshewascryi
ngwheny ouwerein
hospi
tal
.Itwasasi
fsomeonehaddi ed.”
“
Mxm…Iwasscar
ed.
”
KennysqueezedEsi
’
sHand.Sean’
sphonerangfrom
hi
spocket,hetooki
toutandwal
kedout.Kenny
smil
ed.
“
Whataman!I
sheMaat
la’
srepl
acement
?”
“
What
?No!Idon’
tev
enwanthi
m.”
“
Youguy
swoul
dlookcut
e.”
Esi
chuckl
edt
hent
ear
sfi
l
ledherey
es.“
Iam
mour
ningmybaby
.St
opi
t.
”
“
Sor
ry.
”
Seanwalkedbacki
nsi
det
her
oom.“
Ihav
etogo.Esi
wewil
ltalk.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Hetur
nedtoKennyandsmi l
edlocki
ngey eswit
hher
.
Hefi
nall
yforcef
ull
ypul
l
edhiseyesfrom herand
wal
kedout.Esil
ookedatKenny
.
“
Whatwast
hat
?”
“
What
?”
“
Thatt
hingy
ouj
ustdi
dwi
thhi
m.”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Whatt
hing?
”
“
Hewasl
ooki
ngaty
ouwi
thadmi
rat
ion.
”
“
What
?No.It
hinki
twaswi
thsur
pri
se.That
’sal
l
.”
“
Doyouwanthi
m?It
houghty
ouwer
egoi
ngt
ofi
x
y
ourf
amil
y?”
“
Iam goi
ngt
ofi
xmyf
ami
l
y.Idon’
twanthi
m.”
“
Ok.
”
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#62

Latert
hatdayKennywal kedar oundt hebedroom
l
ookingaround,sheopenedt hewar drobeand
l
ookedatallhissui
tes.Herey eswentt ohi sf
ormal
shoesthenthesneakers.Shesi ghedclosingthe
wardobethenwalkedtot hesitti
ngr oom whereQ
waswat chi
ngTV.Shesmi l
edsi tt
ingbesidehim.
“
Doest
eachercomeher
eof
tenQ?
”
“
Shecameonet
imeonl
y.
”
“
Thet
imeshecookedf
ory
ou?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Whataboutot
herwomen?Whooncesl
epther
e?”
“
Oh…aunt
yAmber
.”
“
Expectaunt
yAmber
?”
Ql
ookedather
.“Gr
annyoncesl
epther
e.”
Kennysi
ghed.“
Shei
stheonl
yone?
”
“Daddysai
dIshoul
dn’
ttal
kaboutt
hoset
hings
becauseyouwil
lgoaway.
”
Kennyclosedhereyestaki
nginadeepbr
eatht
hen
l
aughed.“Iam notgoi
ngany wher
e.Di
daunt
yCandy
evercome? ”
“
No.
”
“
It
’sok,
wat
chTV.
”
Kennyr
eachedforherphonel
yi
ngont
heot
her
coucht
hentext
edTshenolo.
Kenny
:Whatdi
dhesay
?
Tshenol
o:Yes!Wear
eal
lgoi
ngt
oget
herasaf
ami
l
y.
Kenny
:See?It
oldy
ou.
Tshenol
o:Ei
shmma,wasj
ustscar
ed.
Kenny:Iam i
nGabs,keet
etsi
babydaddy
.(Iam
vi
sit
ingbabydaddy
.)
Tshenolo:Maaka,
otl
etsemor
obal
o(Li
es,
youar
e
hereforsex.
)
Kenny
: can’
tdenymysel
fni
cethings,
any
waysIhav
e
togoforajobint
erv
iewinKasanetomor
row
Tshenol
o:Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
ethen?
Kennycal
l
edher
.
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
ethen?
”
“
Q.”Shest
oodupandwal
kedbackt
othebedr
oom.
“
Aker
ehecanal
way
svi
sit
.”
“
Ronasay
sIshoul
djoi
nhi
m.”
“
Athi
scompany
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Whatdoy
out
hink?
”
“I
t’
sagoodi
deammegoneIj
ustdon’
twantt
omi
x
busi
nesswi
thpl
easur
e.”
“
Youj
ustkeepi
tpr
ofessi
onal
atwor
k.”
“GapeRonawaboulel
a,someti
mesIjustneeda
breakfr
om hi
m,.Nowimagineseei
nghim atwor
k
thenathome.
”
“Ist
il
ldon’
tunder
stand,
ofcauseIam happyf
ory
ou
butareyoubackwithhi
m?”
“
Ilov
ethatmanNol
o.Icanl
i
eandsayal
lthi
ngsbut
t
het r
uthi
sIlovehim somuch.Ev enaft
ereveryt
hing
t
hathappenedIstil
l l
ovehim.Evenaft
erthefi
ve
year
sIspentinjai
l,Isti
lll
ovehim.Hemakesme
f
eel…”Shesighed.“IthoughtwhenIwalkoutofj
ailI
wouldbeoverhim butIlovehim.”
“
Eish,
Iunder
stand,
att
heendwedon’
tchoose
whom welov
e.”
“Butt
hist
imei
t’
sgoi
ngtobedif
fer
ent.Thi
sti
meI
am goi
ngtowal
kaway.Ihav
epromisedmysel
fto
walkaway.
”
“Iam behindyouont
hat
.Ist
il
lcan’
tbel
i
evet
hatshe
kil
ledhersel
f.
”
Kennyswal
l
owed.“
Met
oo.
”
“
Iam knocki
ngof
f,Iwi
l
lcal
lyoul
ove.
”
“
Ok.
”
Kennyhungupt henopenedamessagef r
om
Mot husi.Shereadi
tthenthoughtf
ull
yrepl
iedbefor
e
blockinghisnumber.Shechangedhermi ndthen
ratherunblockedhi
m andcalled.
“
HeyKenny
..
”
“Hi.Ithinkweshoul dst opt al
ki ng.Ihav edeci dedt o
fi
xt hingswi thrr
agweQandt hesamewayIwon’ t
l
ikei tifhewer etal
kingt oexesandcal li
ngt hem i s
thesamewayIdon’ tthi
nkhewoul dlikemeandy ou
tal
king.Iam t ryi
ngtogi vethisr elat
ionshipachance,
Iam notsur eifhereallycheat edonmet hatni ghtor
not,may behadIl i
stenedashet ri
edt oexpl ainI
woul dnothav edonewhatIdi d.Hei snott her eason
Iwentt ojail
,Iwasther esonIwentt ojail
,hedi dn’
t
for
cemet oshootany one.Ijustwantt owor konmy
rel
at i
onshi p,t
heleastIcandoIt ryandseei fit
wor ksesengkesal alebowhati f(insteadof
remai ningwi t
hwhati fs.)Wheni tdoesn’ twor kI
wantt owal kawayknowi ngthatIr eallytr
ied.”
“
NyaaIgety
ou.Iunderst
and.Ij
usthopeyouar
e
maki
ngther
ight
fuldeci
sion,
foryouandy
ourson.
”
“IfIam nott
henIwillj
usttakemyl ossesandgo.I
reall
yloveRonaandt obehonest …wewer efinetil
l
thatinci
dent.
”Shesighed.“Iam choosingtoletthe
pastgo.Mysoni smor ereasonwhyIwantt otryand
makei twork.Hedeservesapr operfamil
ygape
mot honyanawatengoexci tedgore.
”
Mothusilaughed.“Ki
dsalwaysgetexcitedwhen
thei
rparentsaretogether
.Ialwaysseeitwit
hLefa,
wheneverLetsoandIar etogetherhegetssohappy.
Theothertimeheev enaskedwhenwear egoing
backtobeingar ealfamil
y.
”
Theybot
hlaughed.
“
Gat
wer
eal
fami
l
y?”
“
Heela!ThenIhadtoexplai
nt ohi
mt hatLef
a,
mommyandIar enolongerhusbandandwife,
weno
l
ongerloveeachotherl
ikethat
.”
“
Howol
dishenow?
”
“
8goi
ngt
o9.Theygr
owr
eal
l
yfast
.”
“Yourgi
rl
fr
iend,
shei
spr
ett
y.Youshoul
dst
ickwi
th
her.
”
“Youarer
ight
,nowthatwet
alki
ng,Ial
sofeel
li
ke
shedeser
vesthelov
eshewants.Shecan’
tbe
beggi
ngmet olov
eherri
ght
.It’
snotri
ght.
”
“
Iam gl
ady
ouar
eseei
ngy
ourmi
stakes.
”
“
Yeah.Shehasbeennothi
ngbutthebest.Seei
ng
y
ouconfusedmet woseconds.KanaIusedtoreal
l
y
l
ovey
out
henImessedi
tup.
”
“I
ja,y
ousaidIwasyoursi
stert
henhadsexwi
th
Letsoint
hesameroom Iwas.”
Mothusi
laughed.“
Yousai
dIhadadogdi
ck.Ti
l
l
t
odayIwonderifmydicki
ssmall
.”
Kennyl
aughedtoo.“
No, I
t’
sjustok.Ihaven’
tseen
muchdicksl
ennabutIhavemetdi sabledpeopl
e
wit
hhugethi
ngssoIt hi
nkyouar ej
ustanor mal
guy.
”
“
Ebeokar
edi
sabl
ed.
”
“
Iam t
ell
i
ngy
ou.Thei
mportantt
hingisusi
ngit
.If
y
ouknowhowtousei
tthenit
’sgood.Nostr
ess.
”
“
Ithi
nkIcanusei
twel
l
.”
“
Thenyouhav
enoreasont
owor
ry.Any
way
sIjust
want
edtomakesur
eweareont
hesamepage.
”
“
Igety
ourpoi
ntandl
ennaIagr
ee.
”
“
Thenwear
egood.Sot
hisi
sgoodby
eri
ght
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Shar
p.”
“
Goodl
uck.
”
Keenysmiledthenhungupanddelet
edthenumber
.
Shegotupandwentt otheki
tchenwher
eshe
st
artedcooking.

*
**

Esisatonherbedstaringatt
hecei l
i
ngasal otof
thoughtsf
ill
edhermind.Shefeltsodeadinsideshe
wasev enthi
nkingofkil
li
nghersel
f.Tear
sf i
l
ledher
eyesasshet ri
edtothi
nkofwhatshemayhav ebeen
doingwrong.Therehadtobesomet hingforhimto
havetwokidsoutthere.
Atearr
oll
eddownhercheek.Shel
ookedather
phonet
hentooki
tandcall
edSean.
“
Hey
…”
“Hi
.Iam gett
ingdi
schar
gedsoonandmymotheris
comingt
ot akeme.Iwil
lbegoneforal
i
ttl
ewhi
le.I
needsometimetocoll
ectmysel
f.
”
“
Iunder
stand.Iam r
eal
l
ysor
ry.Godknowsy
ou
deser
vebet
ter
.”
“
Thanky
ouf
oral
lyourhel
p.”
“
No,
it’
sok.
”
“
Isawt hewayyouwerelooki
ngatKenny
.Doyou
wanther?Shei
ssortofsingl
eatt
hemoment.
”
Seanlaughed.“No.Iwasjustsurpri
sedthatsucha
beauti
fulgi
rlcanfindher
selfi
nt heci
rcumstances
shefoundher sel
f.Ial
waysthoughttheyweret he
typet
owal kawayf rom t
oxi
csi t
uati
onsbutnowIam
suremjoloisascam foreveryone.Notonlyforus
theuglyones.”
Esilaughedsof
tl
y.“
Shereal
l
ylovedhim,Iguess
that’
swhysheactedthewayshedid.Sheloves
hard.”
“Li
keyoudi d.Andt her
eisnothi
ngwrongwi ththat
unl
essy ouar el
ovingthewrongperson.Ihavebeen
hurtalot,
youseer ightnowIam si
ngle,it
’sbecause
myhear tj
ustcouldn’ttakei
tanymore.Ialmostkill
ed
myselfandt hat
’swhenIdecidedtojusttakeabr eak
andtakeiteasy.”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“It
’sok.I
t’
sbeenyearsandIhavehealed.It
hinkIam
readytogeti
ntoarelat
ionshi
pbutt
heper sonIam
eyeingseemstheyneedspacetomakeadeci si
on
withoutmetheret
oinfl
uencethem.”
“
Youl
i
kesomeone?
”
“Yes.Sheisbeautiful
.Inandout .Shehascaptured
myhear tbutIdon’tknowi ftwobr okenhear
tscan
betogether.Keatsoga( Igetscared)whenIthi
nk
aboutit
.”
“
Youwi
l
lnev
erknowt
il
lyout
ry.
”
“Iguessyouar eri
ght.ButanotherreasonwhyIwas
stari
ngatKennyt hatway,myhear twasal so
pounding,shelookslikemyexsomehow.Icansee
somesi milar
it
iesinthem,thewayt heysmi l
e…thei
r
eyes…shei smor ebeauti
fult
hanmyexormay beI
am beinghatefulbut…therei
sjustsomet hingt
hat
remindsmeofmyex. ”
“
What
’st
henameofy
ourex?
”
“
Bof
elo.
”
“Bof
elo?Myhusband’
ssidechickisBof
elo.Years
backther
ewasawomanwhocal l
edMaatlathenI
memor i
zedhernumber,
whenIsawherpi ctures,
I
wasshookbecauseshelookedli
keKennyt hough
Kennycouldn’
tseei
t.
”
“
Arey
ouser
ious?
”
“Yes.Iam surei
t’
sthesamewoman.Whydi
dyou
breakupwi t
hher?”
“
Shegotpr
egnantandi
twasn’
tmi
ne.Idi
dDNAaf
ter
t
hechi
ldwasborn.
”
“
Ist
hechi
l
d’snameSapphi
re?
”
“
Inev
erasked.
”
“
Ithi
nki
t’
sthesamewomanSean.
”
“
Whatasmal
lwor
ld.
”
“
Yah…”
Thedooropenedt
henhermot
heri
n-l
awwal
kedi
n.
“
Ihav
etogo,
bye.
”
“
Shar
p.”
Hermot heri
n–lawhuggedher
.“Iam sorr
ymy
baby.
.Whateverdeci
si
onyouar
egoingt otake,
Iful
l
y
supportyou.
”

*
**

Maat
lal
ookeddownashi
sfat
herscol
dedathi
m.
“
Youjustcoul
dn’
tkeepagoodwoman!Youhadt
o
r
uint
hattoo!”
Atsi
lelookedathisbrotherbei
ngscoldedthen
si
ghed.“Hemadeami stakeandheacknowledgesi
t.
Eit
herway ,Idon’
tthi
nkweshoul dthrowstoneswhn
weliveinglasshouses.Youwer ealsoseei
ng
someonebehi ndmama’ sback.”
“
Inev
erhadki
dsoutt
her
e.”
“Butt
hatdoesn’
tmakei
tri
ght.Heiswrongbutwe
needstandwit
hhim.Wearehisf
amily
.”
“Iam notgoi
ngt ost
andbyhisnonsense.Twoki
ds!
Two!Andanot herontheway
? ”
“
RonaandIwi
l
lst
andwi
thhi
mify
ouwon’
t.
”
Maat
lal
ookedathi
syoungerbr
otherashest
oodby
hi
m.
“Weallmakemi stakes,
somemi st
akesaremor
e
worsethanothersbutthat’swhatmakesushuman.
Iam cal
lingRona,hewillcall
bomal omesowecan
goandt alkt
oEsi’
sf amil
y.”
Thei
rfat
herj
ustl
ookedathi
m ashecal
l
edhi
s
brot
hert
henhesi
ghedsit
ti
ng.
“
Iwil
lcal
lyouruncl
esbuti
t’
sgoi
ngt
obehar
dforher
t
oforgi
veyou.”
Maat
lanodded.“
Thanky
ou.
”

*
**

Latert
hatnightNanaowalkedinsi
dear est
aurant
withMothusiinherev
eningdress.Shesmiledatthe
fancyr
estaurantt
hentheysatdownatt hei
rtabl
e.
“
Thi
sisni
ce.
”
“
Yeah.
.”
Thewait
ercamewit
hthebott
leofwi
neandt
hei
r
gl
assesandpour
edineachgl
ass.
“
Enj
oy!
”
Hewal
kedaway
.Nanaosmi
l
ed.“
Babe…wow.
.”
Mot
husi
lookedatherandsmi
l
edcl
ear
inghi
sthr
oat
.
“
Bef
orewedr
ink,
Iwantt
otel
lyousomet
hing.
”
Sheputhergl
assdownt
henhewentonhi
sknee.
“ThereisalotIwantt osaybutitallcomesdownt o
howmuchIl ovey ou.Il oveyousomuch, inthepast
yearsyouhav et aughtmeal ot,youhav etaughtme
thatlov
ecomesnat ural
ly
…y ouhav etaughtmet hat
l
ov eissomet hingbeaut if
ul.Youhav ebeenpat i
ent
withme, somucht hatsomet i
mesIf eelIdon’t
deserveyou.”Het ookoutt heri
ngasev er
y oneint
he
restaur
antwat chedt hebeauti
fulmoment .
“
Andtoday
,Nanao,
Iam aski
ngy
out
obemywi
fe,
wi
ll
youmarrymebabe?
”
Nanaosmi
ledemoti
onal
l
ythenshenodded
st
ret
chi
ngherhand.
“Yes.
.yesIwi
l
lmar
ryy
ou.It
houghty
ouwoul
dnev
er
ask.”
Hesli
dtheri
ngonherfi
ngerthenhegotupand
ki
ssedherwhil
epeopl
eclappedcheer
ing.

*
**

Laterthateveni
ngRonasmi ledparki
nghiscar
besidetheRubiconthenexcitedl
ysteppedout
, He
hadsuspect editwhenhishousekey swentmissi
ng
attheof f
icebutseei
nghercarr i
ghtther
e…fuck,t
he
excit
ementmadehi m wanttojumpupanddown.
Hewalkedinsi
dethehouset henl
ookedatKenny
andQlaughingwatchingTV.Hesmiled,
Kenny
tur
nedtohim androl
ledhereyes.
“
Keng?(
What
?)”
Heshookhi
shead.“
Iam j
ust
…happyy
ouar
eher
e.”
Hewal
kedov
erandsatbesi
deherki
ssi
ngher
.
“
Iwantmyof
fi
ceandt
imest
hreewhatt
heywer
e
goingtoof f
ermei nKasanepl usl unchev er
yday .We
arenotgoingt otodoany thingatt heoffi
cewhi chis
notprofessional,
atwor kIam anempl oyeelike
everyoneelse.Noki ssing,notouchi ng
i
nappr opri
atel
yandy oukeepy ourjeal
ousact s
outsi
det hecompanydoor s.AndIam notgoi ngt o
staywi t
hyou, Iam goingt omov eout ,Iam taki
ngQ
with.
”
“
Deal
!
”
“
Ok.Andnosecondchi
l
d.”
“
Under
stood!Yesmam.
”
“
Goandchange.Iwi
l
ldi
shdi
nner
.”
Hegotupthenbumpedfi
stwi
thhi
ssonwalki
ng
away
.Kennychuckl
ed,
boywasevendanci
nghis
waytothebedr
oom.

FI
VEMONTHSLATER
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#63

Fi
veMont
hsLat
er…

Esisatinherpjy
jamasl at
einthemor
ningwithher
hairf
acingall
directi
onswhil
eeati
ngtsabanafr
om
thepot.Sheateev er
ythi
ngwatchi
ngTV.Hermot her
walkedandlookedather .
“
Didy
oubat
h?”
“
Ma?
”
“
Didy
oubat
h?”
“
Noty
et,
youwantust
ogosomewher
e?”
“
Yes.Iwanty
out
oleav
emyhouse.
”
Moesi
lookedathermot
herwi
thaf
rown.“
Ma?
”
“
Youheardme.TodayIwenttomeetthechurch
l
adi
es,y
ouknowthechur chl
adi
esthi
nkIhir
eda
mai
d.Themaidbeingyou.Youl
ookli
keabeggar.
Youdon’ tevenbat hany mor e,youski pday swithout
bathing.Youhai risf aci
ngal lsortsofdi recti
onsand
yourf ace…Gody ourf ace!Womany ouragegot o
beaut yspasandhav efacials.Youl ookt eny ears
older.Whenl i
feslapsy oui nthef ace,youdon’ tkeep
l
y i
ngdownwai ti
ngf orJesust ocomeandpi cky ou
up.Yougetup!Youdusty ourselfandy oumov e
forwar d.Yourfatherl ef
tme, y
ouwer eol denought o
under standthingst hen.Ihady oursistersandI
struggledalone.”
Moesi
lookedathermot
hert
ear
ful
l
y.
“Iknowwhaty ouaregoi ngt hroughi spainful.Iknow
becauseIhav ebeent hereMoesi .Ihavewal kedin
yourshoesbef ore.Iknowhowi tf eel
sbuty ouar e
taki
ngi ttoofarnow.Youl ookl i
keast r
eetkid.I
didn’
traiseyout obel ikethi
s!Ir aisedast r
ong
woman.Amanshoul dn’tbet her easonwhyy oulook
l
ikethis!Youshoul dbat h,doy ourhai randlookl i
ke
otherwoman.Li ket hatgirlyoulov esomuch…
what’shername? ”
Esi
lookeddown.“
Kenny
.”
“Yes.Youshoul
dbel ookingli
keher
,showi
ngMaat
la
whatadiamondhel ost.Yaanongmmar i
ghtnowi
t
seemshej ustl
ostadirtystone.
”
“
Iam depr
essed.
”
“Depressiony agagoemaswe.Idon’ tl
ikeitatal
l.I
f
youdon’ twantMaat laany more,i
fyoucan’ thandle
yourmar r
iageanymor e,youfil
efordivorce.Youlook
foryourownhouse, youbuyy ourthi
ngswai t
ingfor
thecour ttogiveyouwhaty oudeserve.Yougoback
towor k…t akecareofy oursel
f.Si
ncewheni sMaat l
a
God?Hei snoty ouroxygenpr ovi
der.Goandbat h,
shavet hatforestofyours.Youembar r
assme! ”
Hermotherwal
kedaway.Esirai
sedherar
m and
l
ookedatherbushyar
mpits.Sheputt
hepotdown
wipi
nghermouth.Someoneknockedonthedoor
.
Shewalkedt
othedoorandopened.
Seanlookedatherthensmiled.Embarr
assed,Esi
qui
cklyclosedthedooronhisfacethenrushedto
herbedroom.Shetookoffthepy j
amasgrabbingthe
hai
rremov erandwenttothebathroom.
*
**

Meanwhi l
eout
sideSeansighedwalki
ngbacktohis
carthatwasparkedatthegatewit
hwhathehad
boughtherandsatplayi
ngagameonhi sphone
wait
ingforher
.Hedialedhisbrot
herminut
eslat
er.
“
Yah?
”
“
Didy
out
alkt
oyourf
ri
end?
”
“
Yes,
tomor
row.
”
“
Thanks.
”
“Ihopeit
’sall
wort
hit.Ihopesheact
uall
ywantsto
divor
ceherhusband,
mostmar ri
edwill
forgi
vet
heir
husbands.”
“
Yesbutnotwhenhehast
hreeki
dsout
sidet
heir
mar
ri
age.Onemaybebutt
hreei
sabignumber.
”
“Shecanchooset
ofor
giv
ehi
m,y
ouwi
l
lbe
surpr
ised.
”
“
Ifshedoesit
’sf
inebutIam goi
ngtoenj
oyt
he
f
oll
owingfewdayswithher
,Iam goi
ngtomakei
t
wor
thi
t.
.”
“
Youar
ear
iskt
aker
,goshar
pMi
ster
.”
“
Sur
elai
taka.
”
Seansighedstil
lwai
ti
ngthenwentonfacebookand
scr
olledthr
oughhisti
meli
neforawhil
e.Helooked
attheti
me, i
twaspastanhoural
ready
.Het ookhi
s
phoneanddi al
edher
.
“
Hel
l
o?Iam comi
ng.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hehungupandl ookedatt
hedoorbutminut
es
sl
owlypassedandtherewasnot
hingyet
.

Esidi
dhermakeupkeepi ngitmorenat uralt
hen
appli
edli
psti
ckonherl i
pswi t
hherhairt i
ed.Awhil
e
l
atershestoodupi njeansandat -shir
twi thfl
ip
fl
opsthenwal kedoutsmel l
inggood.Shebumped
i
ntohermot herwhof rownedatthet otalchange.
“
Iam goi
ngt
oseemyf
ri
end.By
e.”
“Don’
tgof
ort
ool
ong,
Maat
lai
scomi
ngwi
tht
he
kids.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shewalkedoutandwentstrai
ghtt
othecarandgot
i
n.Seansmiledstar
ingather.
“
Twohour
s.”
Shesmi
l
edembar
rassed.“
Iam sor
ry.Hey
..
”
Seanhuggedher
.“Hi
.Howar
eyou?
”
Shemovedback.“
Iam f
ine.Ican’
tbel
i
evey
oucame
al
lthewayt
oKanye.”
Hesmil
edstar
ingatherchubbyf
ace,
shehadn’
tlost
muchofthepr
egnancyfat.“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Imi
ssedy
ou.
”
Esi
laughed.
“Iwantt
odosomet
hingspont
aneous.AndIwantt
o
doitwit
hyou.
”
Esi
smi
l
edcur
ios.“
What
?”
“
Ialr
eadysor
tedoutourf
li
ght
sandt
hingsl
iket
hat
.I
wantustogoandseeMountKil
i
manj
aro.
”
“
What
?”
“
Ihavebeenwanti
ngtogother
eforawhi
leandI
f
inal
l
ygotachance.Canyoupl
easecomewithme?
”
Esiscreamedput
ti
ngherhandoverherface.“
Yes!
Tlher
rawenakebatl
agotsamaya.Ireal
l
ywantt o
go.”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Ser
ious?
”
“
Yes.Don’
tgetmeexcv
itedi
fyouar
enotser
ious.
”
“
Iam,
butf
rom t
her
ewewi
l
lbegoi
ngt
oZanzi
bar
.”
“
Iam i
n!”
“
Ok,
wel
eav
etoday
.”
“
Iam goodwi
tht
hat
.”
“Now.Ourfl
ightl
eav
esatt
wop.
m,soweneedt
o
dri
veback.
”
“
Ok.Uhcomei
nandmeetmymot
her
.”
“
Ok.
”
Theybothsteppedoutandwalkedi
nsi
dethey ar
dto
thehouse.Esicl
ear
edherthr
oatasshewalkedwi t
h
himinsi
dethehousetothesi
ttingr
oom whereher
motherwas.
“
Dumel
ang…”
Esi
’
smotherl
okedatt
hem andsmi
l
ed.“
Howar
eyou
myboy
?”
“
Iam goody
our
sel
f?”
“
Iam fi
ne.Youmaysi
t.Esi
,takeoffyourpotfr
om
mytabl
e.Howcanyoueatthenleaveitther
e.”
Embarrassed,Esi
pickedt
hepotandt
ookittot
he
ki
tchenwhileSeansatdown.Shewal
kedbacki
n
andsighed.
“
Mama,t
hisi
sSean.Agoodf
ri
endofmi
ne.Sean,
t
hisi
smymother
.”
Seansmi
l
ed.“
Nicet
omeety
oumam.
”
“
Likewi
se.
”
“
Seani
staki
ngmet
oTanzani
a.Wewi
l
lbebacki
na
f
ewday
s.”
Esi
’
smot
herl
ookedatSeanandnodded.
“That
’sokwi
thme,youarebot
hgr
ownadul
ts.Esi
,
comewi t
hmeforasecond.
”
Shef
oll
owedhermot
hert
oherbedr
oom.
“
Maat
lai
scomi
ng.
”
“
Hewi l
ll
eav
etheki
dswi
thy
ou.Iam notgoi
ng
f
orev
er.”
“Don’ty
outhi
nkyoushoul
dgetadi
vor
cebefor
e
goingoutwit
hot
hermen?Youarel
ooki
ngfor
drama.”
“
Iwi
l
lhandl
eMaat
lawhenIcomeback.
”
“Ihopey ouknowwhaty ouaredoi
ng.Thelastthi
ngI
wantistogot othepol
icestati
onandreportyou
missing.Youcanneverpredi
ctaman, hewill
dothe
unthi
nkable.
”
Esil
i
stenedtohermothergoonandont henshe
fi
nal
lywalkedoutandsmil
edatSean.“
Letmepack
mybag.”
*
**

AroundlunchhourKennywal
kedinsidethe
rest
aurantwherePeowaswaiti
ngf orherdr
inki
ng
herjui
ce.Kennysatdownandsmiled.
“
Hey,sor
ryIam l
ate.Ihadameet
ingt
hatneeded
me.
”
“I
t’
sok.Mustbeni
cewor
kingwi
thy
ourman,
Ican
onlyi
magi
ne.”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Att
heoff
icei
t’
sst
ri
ctl
ybusi
ness.
Nofunnygamesatwor
k.”
“
Arey
ouser
ious?
”
“
YesandIl
i
kei
tli
ket
hat
.Itl
et’
smef
ocus.
”
“
Haai
nnaIwoul
dnev
er.
”
Kennysmil
ed.“Any
ways,
Ili
kedyouri
dea.Al
it
tl
e
nyanasomethi
ngtomakeherfeel
goodagai
nisnot
abadidea.
”
“
Yeah,
Ihav
espokent
osomeofherf
ri
endsandco-
wor
ker
sandweagr
eedt
ocont
ri
but
eP600each.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Whatdoy
out
hink?
”
“P600isgood.It
hinkper
sonall
yIwi
l
lcont
ri
but
e
P2000.Makeitextr
aspecial
.”
“
P2000i
sal
ot.
”
“
Iknowbutf
ormeIcanaf
for
dit
.”
“Iknowbutitwi
l
lmakesomeofusl ookbad.LennaI
willhav
etocont
ribut
ethesameamountbecauseI
don’twantt
omakeEsi feel
li
keIdi
dn’
twantto.
”
“
What
?”
“
Ifeel
li
keIam f
orci
ngmy
sel
fony
out
wo.
”
Kenny’
sphonerangf
rom herbag,
Kennyt
ooki
tand
answeredt
hecall
.
“
Ler
ato…”
“
Hey
,yourPAi
sher
efort
hei
nter
view.
”
“
Eish,
Icompl
etel
yfor
gotaboutt
hat
.Iam comi
ng.
”
“
Ok.
”
Kennyhungupt
hensmi
l
edatPeo.“
Wewi
l
ltal
k
l
ater
.”
Shet
urnedandwal
kedout
.

*
**

Maat
laputt
hechi
ldr
en’
sbagsi
ntheboott
hen
j
umpedcall
i
ngRona.
“
Hey
,Iam goi
ngt
oKany
e.”
“
Ok,
Ihopeshet
alkst
oyou.
”
“
Met oo.Iboughtt
hef
li
ghtt
icket
stoKasane.May
be
i
fwehav esomet i
meal
onewewi l
labl
etowork
t
hingsout.
”
“
Hopef
ull
yso.
”
“
Yeh,
ok,wewi
l
ltal
k.”
Hehungupastheki
dsgotinthecar
.He
i
mmediat
elyt
ookoffdr
ivi
ngtoKanye.
*
**

AtMotsamai
RealEstat
e,Kennywalkedi
nsidet
he
bui
l
dingfr
om herl
unchbreak.Ler
atosmi
led.
“
Shei
sther
e…”
Ler
atopoi
nted.
“
Thanks.
”
Kennywal
kedov
ert
othel
ady
.
“
Hi,
sor
ryf
ort
hedel
ay,
wecangoupt
omyof
fi
ce.
”
Thewomanst
ooduptur
ningtoKennythenpaused.
Kenny
’sj
awdr
oppedasshelookedatNametso.
“
Whatdoy
ouwant
?”
Namet sotookadeepbr eath.“
Iam her
ef oran
i
ntervi
ew.Iknowwepar tedonabadnot ebuti thas
beenages.Ir eall
yneedt hi
sjob.Mymot herpassed
onandmysi blingsdependonme, Mysi
st erhasa
chi
ld,myy oungerbr ot
herhast ur
nedtobei nga
thi
ef…please, keagokopaKenny .Don’
tusewhat
happenedwhenwewer est i
lly
oungagainstme. ”
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#64

Kennyl
ookedatast
ear
sfi
l
ledherey
est
hensi
ghed.
“
Come…”
Nametsofol
l
owedKennytoherof
fice.Theybot hsat
downasNametsohandedKennyherr esume.Kenny
l
ookedthr
oughi
tandsighedcl
osi
ngi timpressed.
“Youar emor ethanqualif
iedforthejob.
”Kenny
sighed.“Iunderstandyoursit
uationbutIcan’
ttrust
you.Iam notgoi ngt ouseyourpastagainstyoubut
Ijustcan’ttr
ustyou.Youar ethesameper sonwho
want edmyman, y ouknewexactlywhatyouwer e
doing, whati
ftodayy ougetenviousagainli
kethe
l
astt ime?”
Namet
sot ookadeepbr
eathtr
yingnott
ocrybuther
t
earsr
atherbet
ray
edher.Herl
ipstr
embled.
“I
…”Shetookadeepbreathwipi
ngherface.“
Iam
sorr
y.Iam sor
ryf
orwhathappenedi
nthepast .
Sometimessit
uat
ionsf
orcesustodothingswe
wouldnev erdoi fallwaswel l.Iwr ongedy ouandI
am sor r
y.KennyIr eall
yneedt hisjob.Icameal lthe
wayf rom Serowef orthisjob.Ibor r
owedmoney
becauseIcoul dn’tmisst heinterview.Ibar el
yget
call
edf orint
erviews,theyjustnev ercallmeaf t
erI
apply.Iprayedhar dforthis.I
fy oucan’ thir
emeas
yourPAIunder stand.Icanbeacl eaner.Icanclean,
i
t’sfi
ne.Icandoany t
hing.Any thingt okeepmy
famil
yal i
ve.Please…”Shewentdownonherknees
beggingher .
“
Please…”
Kennysadl
ylookedathert
hensi
ghed.
“
Iwi
l
lgetbackaty
ou.
”
Namet sopressedherli
pstogetherbutshef inal
ly
putherhandsonherf acecrying.Thesituati
onback
athomemadehercr yevenmor e,
knowingshe
wouldbegoi ngbackwithbadnewsbr okeherhear t
.
Hersibli
ngshadstayedallnightpray
ingf orherto
getthejob.Shecouldalr
eadyseet he
disappoi
ntmentontheirfaceswhenshet oldthem
shehadn’tgottent
hejob.
Kennyswall
owedwithguil
tyasshecried.Pov er
ty
hadreal
lybl
ownher,shelookedwayoldert hanher
age.Kennygott
hewipersthenwalkedov erto
Nametsoandhelpedherup.
“
Pleasest
and…”
“Iam beggi
ngy
ou.Icanwash.
.Icancl
ean… Icando
anyt
hing.”
“
Iam r
eal
l
ysor
ryNamet
sobut
…”
Nametsonodded.“Iunder st
and.Butthanky ou.
Thankyouforthi
svaluablelesson.Iwil
lteachitt
o
mysibl
ingsthatwhatyoudoi nt hepastcanalways
comebacktobi t
eyout hefuture.Thanky ou.
”
Namet sowipedawayhert ear
sthentookadeep
breathwal ki
ngoutwi t
hherbag.Shewal kedoutof
thebui ldi
nglookingdownt hentookofft heoldtwo
i
nchheel sandputonherf l
ipfl
ops.Eachst epshe
tookmadeherf eeldi
zzy,shewalkedont hesi
de
snif
fing.Shebi therlowerli
pandcr i
edf orawhi l
e
standingont hesi deoftheroad.Shehadt r
ied
everythingbutnot hi
ngseemedt obewor kingforher
andshewast i
red.Shewashonest lyti
redoft he
di
sappoi
ntment
.Oft
hepov
ert
y.
Shelookedbackandl ookedatt hetaxidr
ivi
ngov er
thenthr
ewher sel
font heroad.Cartir
esscreeched
ontheroadast hetaxidri
versway edhiscartoav oi
d
thewoman.Hest eppedont hebreaksasshe
headedforthehawkersellingairt
imeandsweet s.
Thecarstopped,heangr i
l
ypar kedthecaront he
sideofther
oadandmar chedt othewoman.
“Watsenwa?Obatl
agoi
rang?(
Arey
oucr
azy
?What
arey
out r
yingt
odo?)
”
Namet
sol
ookedathi
m cr
ying.“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Ify
ouwantt
oki
l
lyour
sel
f,doi
tfarf
rom t
her
oad.
”
Shenodded.“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Nxl
a!”
Shewal kedbackt ohiscarandjumpeddr i
vingoff
.
Namet sowal kedlooki
ngaroundsearchi
ngf or
somet hi
ng.Shepausedatt hebrokenglassesthen
pickedashar ppieceandthrewitinherbag.She
walkedt othenextbusstopandsatdownt aki
ngout
theglass,shelookedatherwrist.Shepressedthe
gl
assonherwr
istr
eadyt
osl
i
cet
hrough.
“
Heywena!
”
Sherai
sedherheadandlookedatt
hetaxidr
iver
,he
snat
chedthegl
assfrom herandt
hrewitaway.
“Jesus!Ididn’
tmeangoandkill
y our
selfasindoit
…”
Hesi ghed.“Canyoudoitt
omorrownott oday?I
don’twantt oli
vewit
hthegui
l
tythatItoldyoutoki
ll
yourselfandyoudid.
”
Nametsolookedathi m confused.Hesighedthen
pull
edheri
nsidehisRunXt axi.Heimmedi at
ely
droveof
f.Namet solookedoutt hr
ought hewindow
l
ostinherthoughts.Helookedather ,
hehadnev er
seensuchasadper sonbefore.
“
What
’sy
ourname?
”
Shesl
owl
ylookedathi
m.“
Namet
so.
”
“
What’
sgoi
ngonwi
thy
ou?Whydoy
ouwantt
oki
l
l
y
our
self
?”
Nametsolookedatherhandsast earsdropped.“I
am t
ir
edofdi sappoi
ntment.Iam tir
edof
di
sappoi
ntingmysi bl
ings.Iam notgoingtowat ch
t
hem di
ewi
thhunger
.Ican’
tdot
hat
.”
Hesi
ghedt
hent
urnedbackt
other
oaddr
ivi
ng.

*
**

Maat l
adr ov
ei nsidehismot heri
n-l
aw’ syardthen
parkedbesideEsi ’
scar.Thekidsquicklysteppedout
thenrant othedoorashespr ayedamout hsprayin
hismout h.Hef ixedhiswatchandst eppedout .He
tookthebagsf rom theboot.Hismot herin-
law
openedt hedoorandhuggedhergr andkidsbefore
l
etti
ngt hem runi nthehouse.Sheopenedt hedoor
widerforMaat la.
“
Comei
nson.
.”
Maat
lawal
kedi
nwi
tht
hebagsandputt
hatdown.
“
Howar
eyouma?
”
“
Iam f
iney
our
sel
f.
”
“
Iam f
ine.
”
Theki
dsr
anf
rom t
hebedr
oomswi
thf
rowns.
“
Wher
eismama?
”
“ShewenttoTanzani
awithherf r
iendbutshesai dI
shoul
dcallherwhenyouarri
ve.”Shet ookouther
phoneandgav ei
ttotheki
dst otalktothei
rmot her
.
Maatl
alookedathismotherin-l
awconf used.Rona
hadn’
tmentionedKennygoi
ngany wherewithEsi.
“
Whatf
ri
end?
”
“
Oh,
themal
eone.Sean.
”
Maat
laswal
l
owed.“
Thet
all
li
ghtski
nnedone?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Theyar
egoi
ngt
oTanzani
atoget
her
?”
“
Yes.Gat
weKi
l
imanj
aro.
”
Hel
ookedattheki
dst
alki
ngt
othei
rmot
hert
hen
wal
kedover
.
“
Letmet
alkt
omama,
Iwi
l
lgi
vei
tback.
”
Het
ookt
hephonet
henwal
kedout
.
“Wher
eareyougoi
ngwi
tht
hatman?Moesi
youar
e
sti
l
lmarr
ied!
”
“
WhenIcomebackwear
eget
ti
ngadi
vor
ce.
”
“
Noonei
sdi
vor
cing.
”
“
Iam di
vor
cingy
ousoy
oucanmar
ryBof
elo.
”
“Tl
hemmababedon’
tsaythat
,keagokopa.(Iam
beggi
ngy
ou.)Comeback.Iwantt
ofi
xthings.”
“
Iam notcomi
ngback.Iam goi
ngf
orav
acat
ion.
”
“Iwi
llt
akey
out
her
e,Ihadboughtt
icket
sto
Kasane.
”
“Iam goi
ngtoTanzani
a,y
ouaretal
ki
ngabout
Kasane?TakeBofel
otoKasane.
”
“Babepl
ease…Iam beggi
ngyou.Don’
tdot
his.Hei
s
goingt
osleepwit
hyou.Hejustwant
ssex.
”
“
SodoI
.Ihav
en’
thaddi
cki
nawhi
l
eandIwanti
t.
”
Hisheartbrokeashelist
enedtoherspeaki
ngli
ke
that.I
tdidn’
tevensoundli
kehiswif
e.“Iam goi
ngt
o
kil
lyouifyousleepwit
hhim.”
“
AndIam recordi
ngthiscall
,Iam goi
ngtotakei
tto
t
hepoli
ce.Want l
waelaMaat l
a.Youthi
nkyoucan
j
ustwhorearoundandhav ekidsontopi
tthencome
backtostupi
dEsi?Youdon’
tscar
eme.Iam goi
ng
torepor
tyou.Youthi
nkIam f
ooli
sh.
”
“
Iam goi
ngt
oki
l
lbot
hofy
ou.
”
“Ki
llbothofuswher e?Thisguyi smuchmor e
dangeroust hanyouandhei sgoingt ogiveittome
good.Ol ebegaat swer edickyetonagogai say a
gago.(Heseemst ohav eabi ggerdickthany our
s.)
Heisgoi ngtodest r
oymypussy ,wewi l
l begonef or
afewday ssoy oucani maginewhathei sgoingto
dotome.Iam goi ngtot eachyouagoodl essonthat
i
fyoudon’ tkill
yourselfyouwi l
lnevercheaton
anyoneev eragain.
”
Heswall
owedal ump.“Babepleasedon’tdot
his.I
l
oveyou,youarebreaki
ngmyhear t
.Pleasedon’tgo
wi
thhim.Iwil
ldowhat every
ouwant.”
“Iam notcomi ngback.Iam goingformyvacati
on
andIcan’ twai
t.Ial
readyhavethesewildt
houghts
whenev erhelooksatmewi ththatsmil
eofhis,Ican
tel
lgorehei snaughtytoo,
Ican’twaitf
ort
his.”
“
Wehav
eaf
ami
l
y.”
“
Youknewwehadaf
ami
l
ywheny
ouwer
e
cheat
ing.
”
“Youprobabl
yki
l
ledmybabysoy
oucanwhor
e
nicel
y.
”
Shelaughed.“Heel
ang!Motshwareng!(Holdhim. )I
wouldneverkil
lmyownbabybutsui tyourself.NowI
am evenmor egladIl
ostthatbaby,
ifIgavebi rt
h
thenri
ghtnowIwoul dn’
tbegoingtoTanzani ato
havemyassf li
ppedaroundwhilebeingservedgood
andnice.
”
Tear
sfil
ledhiseyes.“
Babepl
easedon’
tdothi
s.Kea
gokopa.(Iam beggi
ngyou.
)Youarebr
eaki
ngme. ”
“
OhhoneyIhav en’
tst
art
ed.Iam st
il
lgoi
ngtobreak
yout
il
ltherei
snothi
nglef
t.Youthi
nkyoucantake
meforaf ool
.”
“
Thi
sisnoty
ou.
”
“Thi
sist
henewmey oucr
eat
ed,
youmadey
ourbed
andnowsleeponi
t.
”
“
Whatshoul
dIdo?
”
“Heel
arr
a,Idon’tknow.Leaveal
oneiswhaty
oucan
do.Wambor a.(
Youar ebori
ngme.)
”
Hesni
ff
edcr
ying.
“Ebil
ewal el
a?( Youar eevencr yi
ng?)”Esilaughed.
“Whatawow!Youcan’ thandlet hemedi ci
ney ou
serve?Youmademeaf ool,hadt hr
eekidsbehi nd
myback.Youl i
terall
yhadt wof amili
es.Youpl ayed
mef oraf oolandIwassosur eaboutyou.Il oved
you,Ilovedy ousomuch, Igavey oueveryt
hingy ou
couldhav eev erwi shedfor.Idideveryt
hingawi f
e
couldhav epossi blydonet okeepherhusbandhappy .
Ididitallandwhatdi dIgetinr etur
n?Humi l
iat
ion!
Embar rassment .Youdr aggedmei ntothemud.Now
i
t’syourt urntof eelhowitfeels.Ebil
enkarenkai ma.
(Ishouldgetpr egnant .
)”
“
Babypl
ease…”
“Ihaven’tst
artedyet.Youarestill
yetgoi
ngtocry
wheny ouwat chmebei nghappywi t
hmynewman.
Hei sgoingtogivemet hebestloveint
heworl
d
becausehet oohasbeenhur tbeforesoweboth
understandhowi tfeels.
”
Maat
laputhi
shandonhi
schestf
eel
i
ngashar
ppai
n,
hegr
oanedhi
ssi
nginpai
n.
“Iam goi ngtof ixy ouf orthenextwomany ouf i
nd.
Shei sgoi ngtof indy oual lstraightandi norder.You
thoughty ouwer et heshi taker e,havingt wowomen,
cheatingonmeandhav i
ngki ds.Nami ngy ourwhore
kidsboSapphi r eleboDi amondsasi fy ouowna
mi ne,koor eyousawy our selfatt hetop, untouchable.
Yousawy oursel fasat opdog, Iam goi ngt obri
ng
youbackt oy ourl evel.Iam goi ngt oshowy outhat
youai n’
tshi t
.Youai n’tnot opdogbutj ustar egular
streetdog.Thepr oblem i sthaty out houghtbecause
Itreatedy ouliket heKi ngoft heent i
reuni verseyou
coulddoany thingbutwhaty oudi dn’treali
zei sthat
youwer enowher ecloset obei ngaKi ng, youwer e
onei nmyey esandnowy ouar enotany mor e.Don’t
wor ry
, t
hiswi l
l comei nhandyf ort henextwoman
youmeetormar ry.
”
Maatla’
sel
destchi
ldwal
kedoutasMaatladropped
thephoneandfel
ltot
heground.Hepi
ckedthe
phone.
“
Hel
l
o?Mama,
daddyf
ell
.”
“Don’twor
ry,
call
yourgrandmot
her.Hewil
lwakeup.
Ilov
ey ouok?Iwil
lbebackinafewdays.
”
“
Ok,
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Esi
hungup.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#65

AtSirSeretseKhamaAi r
port,Esi
walkedbesi
des
Seanstaringatherphone.Shewor r
iedl
yst
aredati
t,
Seanturnedt oherandsmiled.
“
Yougood?I
fyouar
enotcomf
ort
abl
e-“
“
No.I
t’
sok.
”
“
Yousur
e?I
t’
snott
ool
atet
otur
nbacky
ouknow?
”
Esi
’
sphoner
ang,
shel
ookedatKenny
’scal
l
.
“
Kenny
..
”
“
Gat
wewakae?
”
“
Youhav
eal
readyhear
d?”
“Maat
lahasbeenrushedtothehospi
tal
,appar
ent
ly
hehadaheartat
tack.What’
sgoingon?”
Esit
ookastepf
rom Sean.“
Iam goi
ngt
oTanzani
a
wit
hSean.
”
“
Seant
hebadboy
…”
Esi
laughed.“
Iam soexci
ted.
”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Maat
lai
sgoi
ngt
odi
e.”
“
Idi
dn’
tdi
ewhenhecheat
edonme.
”
“
Soy
ouandSean…?
”
“
Wear
egoi
ngasf
ri
ends.
”
“
Hei
sgoi
ngt
ofucky
ou.
”
Esi
smi
l
ed.“
No.Hei
snot
.”
“
Heis.Heisgoi
ngtogiv
eittoyou.Nomanwi l
lj
ust
wakeupanddeci
detotakeyouonatripj
ustas
f
ri
ends…youguyswil
lbealonet
here.
”
“
Bye!
”
“
Enj
oymma.Youhav
ebeent
hroughsomuch.
”
“
Yeah…by
e!”
“
Bye.
”
Esismil
edt henswit
chedof
fherphonewal
ki
ngov
er
toSean.“Let’
sgo.”
Seantookherhandthent
heycheckedinbef
ore
headi
ngtothei
rplane.Mi
nut
eslatert
heywere
backl
edandwai
ti
ng.
“
Readyf
ort
his?
”
Esi
lookedathi
m.“
Yes.
”
“Wearegoingthr
oughZimbabwe.Theyhaveadir
ect
fl
ightt
oDarEsSalaam.From t
her
ewewi ll
flyt
o
Kil
imanjar
o.”
“
Ok.
”
Theplanetookoff
,Esismi
ledalreadyseeinghersel
f
i
nMountKi li
manj
aro.Onceintheirai
r,Seanlooked
atherwit
hanunexplai
nablesmilethathadEsi
bl
ushing,t
herei
twasagain,t
hatsmi l
eofhi s.
“
Youar
egoi
ngt
oenj
oyt
his,
Ipr
omi
sey
ou.
”
Shenoddedsmil
ing.“
Icanal
readyf
eel
it.Koor
eI
can’
tevensi
tst
il
l.”
Seanlaughedstaringatherlips,
hisfatherhad
alwaystaughthimt ogof orwhathewant edwithout
hesit
ati
on, t
hathesitat
ionwasasi gnofweakness.
Het i
lt
edherchint henleanedoverandsweptherl i
ps
withhisFrenchkissingher.Hekissedhersogood
thatEsifel
therwhol ebodycomeal iv
e.Hest opped
thenmovedbackwit
hasmi l
ewhi
l
eshest
aredat
him,herl
i
pssli
ght
lyopen.
Shecouldfeel
herdamppant iesandwasn’ tsureifi
t
wasbecauseithadbeentimesi ncethelastti
me
shehadamanont opofher,sweatingandbr eathi
ng
heav
il
yont opofher.Shepressedherlegst oget
her
asdi
rtysinf
ulthought
sfi
ll
edherhead.

*
**

Kennywalkedoutofherof
ficewit
hherbagsand
walkedt
ohercar.Shegotinandsattheref
ora
whil
ebeforefi
nal
lycal
li
nghergrandmother
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Kenny
?”
“
Mmama,
howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?
”
“
Ifeel
bet
ter
.Thegi
rly
ouhi
red,
shei
sreal
l
ygood.
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Shei
s.”
“
Shet
akesgoodcar
eofme.
”
“Shei snice.Thepeoplef r
om CEDAhav en’t
respondedt ome.Wher eIappliedf ormyf undingto
startmybusi ness.Iam losinghopebecausei nor der
tostartthatbusinessIneedal otofmoney .Ifounda
plotjustintheoutskir
tsofGabor one.It’
sabi garea
andv eryexpensivebutbeaut i
ful.IthinkIshouldjut
forgetaboutt hatandtrysomet hingel se.
”
“
Whyshoul
dyougi
veup?
”
“BecauseIdon’
thavemoney.IthinkIshouldjust
savetobuyasmal l
plotandstartbuil
dingmyhouse.
Thatmakesmor esensethanstarti
ngabusi ness
wheny ouknowyoudon’thavethef unds.Ineedalot
ofmoney .
”
“Yourgrandfat
herhadafarm.I t
’sabigfarm but
whenhedi edIcouldn’
tkeepthingsmov ingthere
andeitherway,Kefi
lwesoldthelivest
ock.Rightnow
i
t’sj
ustahugear eawithnothing.Thatplotisyour
s,
youcansel l
apieceorhalfofitthenuset hatmoney
tostar
tthebusiness.”
Tear
sfi
l
ledKenny
’sey
es.
“
Thatpl
oti
syour
ssowhynot
?Idon’
thav
emuch
l
ongerhereinthewor
ld.I
twoul
dmakemehappyt
o
knowIlef
tleavi
ngyouhappy
.Youar
ether
easonI
keepbr
eathing.
”
Kennyputherhandov
erhermout
hcr
ying.
“Thati
swhyIchangedownershi
pofmostt
hings.I
canfeeli
tthatmyt
imeisneari
ng.
”
“
Don’
ttal
kli
ket
hat
.Youcan’
tleav
eme.
”
Hergrandmot
herl
aughed.“
Kenny
,dy
ingi
spar
tof
l
if
e.”
“
No…”
“
Iti
s.Wheni
sthi
sboymar
ryi
ngy
ou?
”
Kennychuckl
edwi
pingawayhert
ear
s.“
Youhav
e
st
arted.
”
“
Youshoul
dgetmar
ri
ed.Youar
enotgr
owi
ngany
y
ounger
.”
“
Iwantt
ogetmar
ri
edaf
terIest
abl
i
shmy
sel
f.
”
“
Can’
tyoudoi
twhi
l
emar
ri
ed?
”
“
Iwantt
ost
andonmyownf
ir
st.
”
“
Youshoul
dgetmar
ri
edandgi
veQui
ntonasi
bli
ng.
”
Shel
aughed.“
Mmama!
”
“
Iam tell
i
ngy ou.Youcan’
tjusthav
eonechi
l
d.Now
l
et’
stalkaboutwhyy oucal
l
edme. ”
Kennysi ghed.“ Therewasagi rlIwasoncef ri
ends
withherwhenIf i
rstcamet oGabor one.It houghtme
andhercoul dbef ri
ends, shehadasadsi tuation
happeni ngathomeandwasal way sbr oke, Iwoul d
giveahel pinghandher eandt heret il
lshet ried
comi ngbet weenRonaandIbecauseshewant ed
whatRonawasgi vi
ngme.Sheputacondom i nhis
carsoIcant hinkhewascheat ing.Af terthat ,
our
fri
endshi pendedt henshel eftthoughshedi d
apologize.Nowy earslatershecomest omyof f
ice
foranint er
v i
ew.Sheexpl ai nedt omet hather
mot herisdeadandsher eal l
yneedsaj obt osuppor t
hersibli
ngs.Theyar estruggl i
ng, sheev enbor r
owed
moneyt ocomef ortheint ervi
ew.Ir efusedt ohire
herbecauseofwhatl asthappened.If eelgui l
tyright
now, sheapol ogizedforhermi stakes.”
“
Leopar
dseatpeopl
e.Theyar
ecar
niv
ores,
theyeat
meatandyouar emeat .Youf indaleopar
di nthe
for
estandithasbeenpr ickedbyabi gthorn,i
tcan’
t
walkandit
’sinpain.Direpain.Youdecidethatyou
wil
lhel
pittheny outakeoutt hethorn.Whatisit
goi
ngtodoaf terthat?
”
“
Eatme.
”
“Eatyoubecausewhat ?Becauseal eopardwi l
l
foreverbeal eopard,
itcannev erchangei t’
sspots.
Onceasnake, alwaysasnake.Ev ery
onedeser ves
secondchancesbutasnakewi l
lalway sturnbackto
bit
ey ouifitchooses,it
’sunpredictable.Every
oneis
mosthumbl ewhent heyareatt heirlowest.Yesshe
needshelpbuti tdoesn’tmeany ouhav etohelpher
personall
y.Someoneoutt her
ewi l
lhelpher.”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Ok,
Iwi
l
lcal
lagai
n.Iam dr
ivi
ng
homenow.
”
“
Ok.
”
Kennyhungupandstar
tedthecaranddrov
etoher
house.Shewal
kedi
nandl ookedatAmberbusy
hel
pingQwithhi
shomewor k.
Sheki
ckedof
fherheel
ssi
tt
ing.
Qgotupandhuggedhi
smot
her
.“Hi
mama…”
“
Heymyboy
,howwasschool
?”
“
Fine.
”
“
HiKenny
.”
“
HiAmber
.Youcango.
”
“
Ok.
”
Ambergotupandputhershoest
hengrabbedher
handbagwal
ki
ngoutasKennycall
edRona.
“
Heybabe…”
“
Cany
ougetussomet
hingt
oeat
?Iam t
ir
ed.
”
“
Ok,
Iam knocki
ngof
f.Whatdoy
ouwant
?”
“
Any
thi
ngeat
abl
eisf
ine.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shehungupt
henpi
ckedani
ncomi
ngcal
l
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Uh.
.hi
Kenny
.”
“
Hi,
whoi
sthi
s?”
“
It
’sMi
a.”
“
Mia?
”
“Yoursi
ster
.Mamagotadmi
tt
edi
nhospi
tal
last
night
.”
Kennyf
rownedsi
tt
ingupr
ight
.“Why
?What
’swr
ong?
”
“Shewascaughtwi
thamar
ri
edmanandgot
beaten.
”
“
Wow!
”
“
Thelandl
ordl
ockedt
hedoorbecausewedi
dn’
tpay
r
ent
.”
“
Who’
sphonei
sthi
s?”
“
Mynei
ghbor
’s.
”
“
Ok,uhhwhatdoy
ouwantmet
odo?Shoul
dIsend
money?
”
“
Yespl
ease.
”
“
Ok.Howmuch?
”
“
Mamahasn’
tbeenr
entf
ort
hreemont
hsnowand
t
her
eisnof
ood.”
“
Howmuch?
”
“
P4000wi
l
lbef
ine.
”
“
Ok.l
etmeewal
l
eti
t,canIdoi
tont
hisnumber
?”
“
Yes.
”
“Ok,Iwil
ldoi
tnow.Howar
eyou?Youar
einwhat
grade?”
“
For
m 4butIam wr
it
ingwi
tht
hef
orm 5’
s.
”
Kennysmil
ed.“
Wow!That
’si
mpr
essi
ve.Andwhat
ar
ey ougoi
ngtost
udy
?”
“
Iam notsur
eyet
.”
“
Ok…letmesendt
hemoney
.Sowher
ewi
l
lyousl
eep
t
oni
ght?”
“
Thenei
ghborsai
dIcoul
dsl
eepathi
shouse.
”
“
Wher
eishi
swi
fe?
”
“
Hedoesn’
thav
eone.
”
“
Yout
hinki
t’
ssaf
e?”
“
Ihav
eknownhi
mforawhi
l
enow.Hei
sni
ce.
”
“
Ok.Ir
eal
l
ywi
shy
ouhadcal
l
edmesooner
.”
Mi
achuckl
ed.“
Met
oo.
”
“
Letmesendt
hemoney
.”
Shehungupt
hendi
dtheewal
l
ett
ransact
ion.

*
**

Atthehospi
tal
,Maatl
alookedatt
hedoct
orashe
expl
ainedwhathadhappened.
“Yourbloodpr
essur
eiswaytoohigh.Whatev
eris
str
essingyoui
sgoingtoki
l
lyouifitr
emainsli
ke
thi
s.”
Maat
lasi
ghed.“
Ok.
”
“
Youneedt
oseesomeone.
”
“
Ok.
”
Thedoctorexpl
ainedacouplemorethingsthen
fi
nall
ywalkedout.Maat
lareachedf
orhi sphoneand
cal
ledherbutherphonewasnowof f.Hewentt oher
WhatsApp,herprofi
l
epict
urehadchangedandher
l
astseenwasov eranhourback.Hetearful
lylooked
atscr
eenstar
ingathersmil
ingatcameraatt
he
ai
rpor
t.Hi
sheartwaslit
eral
l
ybreaking.
Hesentheramessage.
Maat l
a:Babepleasedon’tsl
eepwit
hhim,Iwil
ldo
anythi
ng,Iwanttofixt
hings.ImessedupandIwant
tofixthi
ngs.Iwil
ldowhat ev
eryouwantIpr
omise.
Pleasecomebackhome.Theki dsandIar
ewaiti
ng
foryou.
Themessagedt
ickedonce.Het
ypedanot
her
message.
Maatla:
Ifyoucheatonmewi t
hyouhim,Iam goi
ng
toki
llmyself
.Pleasecomebackhome,Il
oveyou
babe.IwishIknewwhattodo.Pl
easecomeback
home.
Hesenti
tthenst
aredati
tforawhi
l
ebef
oredi
ali
ng
Rona.
“
Yah?
”
“
Shewentwi
thhi
m.”
“Ei
sh,heispr
obabl
ygoingtofuckher.Hewentwi
th
hersofarawaysothathecanfuckher.
”
“
Iwantt
ogoandgether
.”
“Youdon’tevenknowwher
eshewentinTanzani
a.
Justwaitforhert
ocomebackt
henpleadyour
case.
”
“Iam notl
osi
nghertot
hatpi
eceofshi
t,i
fIcan’
t
haveherthennoonewil
lhav
eher.
”
“
Don’
ttal
kli
ket
hat
.”
“Iam notgoi
ngtowatchherwi
thhim.I’
dratherdi
e
thanwatchthat
.Esi
isnotgoi
ngtoleaveme.When
wegotmar ri
ed,wevowedtoonl
ylett
ingdeathdous
part
.”
“Youwi l
lgotojail
.Cany oujustthinkcareful
l
yabout
yourmar r
iage?BonaMi ster
, Youmessedup.Thr ee
kidsisalot.Youshouldbehumbl ingyoursel
f.
Fight
ingtowi nherback,goingall t
hewayoutt o
makeupf ori
t.Youshouldhav ebeent heonet otake
hertoTanzania.Youarenotput tingallyoureff
ort
i
nt owinni
ngherback.Iwantt ogetmar ri
ed,youare
notgoingt omissmyweddi ngwhi l
erott
inginjai
l.”
“Youarer
ight
…koor
enowIam st
ressed.I
fshe
sleepswi
thhi
m…”
“
Esilovesyou.Shehaslov
edy oufory
ears,
thel
ove
i
stherebutjustcover
edwithpai
n.Youneedtof
ix
t
hat,youmadet hatmess.
”
“
Yeah…di
dshesayy
es?
”
“Iam notgoi
ngtopropose,
sheislikel
ygoingtosay
nobecausesheistooproud.It
alkedtoPapa, they
aregoingtogother
etomorrow.Ifeell
ikeifIdon’t
marryherIam goi
ngtoloseherbecauseev ery
one
noti
cesher,i
t’
sannoyi
ngandwor sewi t
houtar ing
onherf i
nger
.Theydon’
tcarewhetheryouar e
walki
ngwi t
hherornot,t
heywil
lsti
lltr
ytheirl
uck.”
“
Goodl
uck.
”
“Kebatlagomoi misa,(
Iwanttoimpr
egnateher,)I
wasthinkingt
akingheraway,someplacefarnyana
andhav ehert
hereforaweekkemoj a( f
uckingher)
l
eft,
rightandcenter
.”
“
Ihopei
twor
ksout
,wewi
l
ltal
k.”
“
Cool
.”
Hi
smotheri
n-l
awwalkedi
nandsighedstar
ingat
hi
m.“
Howar eyouf
eeli
ng?Iwassoscared.
”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Iam f
inenow.
”
“Don’tstr
esssomuch, youhaveki
dsandtheyst
il
l
needy ou.Ifi
t’
smeantt obei
twil
lbe.Youneedt
o
pryforyourmar r
iage.
”
“
Eemma.
”
“
Good.
”
“
Iam goi
ngtowaitt
il
lshecomesbackandmay be
wecanhavecoupl
e’
scounseli
ngorsomet
hingli
ke
t
hat
.Didshesaywhereinspeci
fi
cshewasgoing?”
“
MountKi
l
imanj
aro.Shewi
l
lbebacki
naf
ewday
s.”
“Yes.Iam get
ti
ngdi
schargedsoon,
Iwi
l
lpassbyat
homet oseetheki
dsthengoback.”
“
Okson.
”
Shewal
kedoutt
henhewentonl
i
neandboughthi
s
pl
aneti
cket
.

*
**
Hourslat
er,Maatlapackedev er
ythinginhi
sbag
thentookhisgunandst aredatitforawhilebefor
e
packingi
t.Helookedatt heti
medoi ngacountdown
tohismorningfl
ightt
hef oll
owingday .

*
**

Meanwhi
l
einTanzani
a….
.
.
l
ikeandcommentassoonasy
our
eadsowehav
e
ourbonusi
nser
ts
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#66

Meanwhil
einTanzania,Seanopenedthedoortothe
l
odgelocat
edont heslopeofKili
manjar
o.Esiwal
ked
i
nandsmi l
edlookingaround.Seanputthei
rbags
down.
“
Uhtherei
sfr
eeWiFiher
esoyoucanal
ertev
ery
one
t
hatyouar
esafei
fyouwantt
o.”
Esi
smi
l
ed.“
Ok.
”
Seanlookedaround.“
Ok,hereisthebathr
oom,t
hey
haveashower .Youcanfreshenup,Iwantto
confi
rm somethingwit
hthelodgemanagement.Wi
ll
youbefine?”
“
Yes.
”
Hesmi l
edandwal kedout.Esi
exci
tedlyt
ookouther
phoneandconnect editt
otheWiFithenwenton
whatsapp.ShelookedatKennywhowasonl i
neand
di
daWhat sAppcall.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,wehav
ear
ri
ved!
”
“
Hol
don,
Iam goi
ngt
othebat
hroom.
”
“
Why
?”
Adoorcl
osedt
henKennysighed.“
Appar
ent
ly
Maat
lawantst
ocomethere.”
Esir
oll
edhereyes.“
Lethi
m come.Hedoesn’
tknow
whereexact
lyIam.”
“
Ronasay sheist
alki
ngaboutki
ll
i
ngyou,Iam
worr
ied.Youknowheisasoldi
erandhasaccesst
o
weapons.”
“
Tlhammai
fther
eisany
onehei
ski
l
li
ngi
shi
msel
f.
”
“
Iam wor
ri
ed.
”
“Don’
tworryaboutme,
Maat
lai
sjustsay
ingbecause
heisstr
essed.”
“
Ok…so,
howi
sit
?”
“Ihaven’
tseennothi
ngmuchbecausei t’
satnight.
Wehadt owaitforawhileforourpl
aneinZimt hen
waitedagainf
oranothertoKil
imanj
aro.Butit
’sall
good.Iwill
seeitall
tomorrow.Iam soexci
ted
Kenny
.”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Ket
swapel
o.”
Esi
laughed.“
Iwi
l
ltakepi
ctur
es.
”
“
Don’
tpostt
hem t
il
lyoucomeback.
”
“Yeah,anywaysIj
ustwant
edtotel
lyout
hatIar
ri
ved.
Cany oucallmamaandtel
lhert
oo?Kanasheisnot
onWhat sApp.”
“
Ok.Ihav
etogo.Becar
eful
,condomi
se.
”
Esi
laughed.“
ByeKenny
.”
Shehungupt henopenedMaat l
a’smessagesand
l
eftthem onr eadbeforeswit
chi
ngof ftheWiFi
and
walki
ngt othebat hr
oom whereshetookashower .A
whil
elatershel ayonthebedgoingthroughthe
pi
cturesshehadbeent aki
ngearl
ieron.Seanwalked
backinther oom.
“
Iam goi
ngt
otakeashower
.”
“
Ok.
”
Hewalkedtot
hebathr
oom t
aki
ngoffhist
-shi
rt
r
eveal
i
ngt het
att
oosonhi
ssexyback.He
di
sappear edint hebathroom thenshecont i
nued
withhergame.Mi nuteslaterhewalkedoutshirt
less
withat owelwr appedaroundhi swaistgoi
ngdown.
Esilookedathi schestandsi ghedbreathl
ess.He
probablywentt othegy m everyday.Shecouldonly
i
magi nehowi twoul dfeel t
ohav ehi
m ont opofher.
Herey eswentdownt ot hatv-l
i
neleadingtohisdick,
nowshewasr eall
ycurious.
“
Didy
out
alkt
oyourmom?
”
“
IaskedKennyt
odoit
,mymot heri
snoton
what
sapp.Shei
sol
dschool
.”
“Ok.Aslongassheknowsy
ouaresafe.Idon’
twant
herstr
essedupunabl
etosl
eepwonderingwhere
youare.
”
“
Oh…”
“
Youmustbet
ir
ed.Thosedel
ayswer
enotpar
tof
t
hepl
an.
”
Shesmil
edputti
ngherphonedownashewal
ked
overt
othebed.“I
t’
sok.I
twasallwor
thi
t.
”
Hel
ookedatherf
orawhi
l
ethenpul
l
edhercl
oser
andki ssedher .Esi putherhandov erthetattooon
hisleftbreastkissinghi m back, herbody
i
mmedi at el
yreacting.Heki ssedherhar dergetting
ont opofherexer ti
ngsomeofhi swei ghtonher .Her
nightdr essrodet oherwai stexposi nghert hi
ck
thighs.Het ookof ft heni
ght dressandl ookedather
breathingheav il
y.Hehadn’ tcomecr osssuchi na
l
ongwhi l
e,hesqueezedherbr eaststhenhisey es
wentdownt ohert ummyr oll
s.Hedr oppedki sses
from herneckgoi ngdownt oherbr eastgivingthem
bot hfairatt
entionwhi leshemoanedsof tl
y.Hislips
wentdownt ohert ummyt henherpant i
es.
Esi
li
ft
edherselfabitashetookherlacepant
yof
f,
hepar
tedherthighsexposi
nghercleanpussy
.
“
Fuck!
”
Hepar tedherpussylipsandl ookedatherpi nkas
hisheartpounded.Hel eanedov erandr anhis
tongueonhersl i
t.Esiclosedherey esgentlyashe
workedhi smouthonher ,gentl
yteasi
ngandsucki ng,
taki
nghi sti
mewi thhissweett ort
ure.Shelookedat
hisheadmoani ng.Hehel dbot hherthighsand
thoroughlyat
eher .Esimoanedev enloudergrabbi
ng
thewhi
tesheet
s,herheadthrownback.She
spasmedashewentf ul
lforceonherclosi
ngher
thi
ghsl
ocki
nghisheadbet weenherlegs.
Hef i
nal
lysethi
mselff
reet
henkissedher.Esi
reachedfort
hetowelt
ofeelt
hatdickbuthepaused
holdi
ngherhand.
“
Ithi
nkweshoul
dsl
eep.
”
Esi
frownedasherpussyt
hrobbedformore.“
Why
?
What’
swrong?Doyouhaveasmal l
dick?
”
Hegotof
fherasshel
ookedathi
m conf
used.
“
Isy
ourdi
cksmal
l
?”
Seanlookedatherandl aughed.“
No.Weshould
sl
eep.Youaret i
red.Idi
dn’tbri
ngyouher
etotake
advantageofyou.OfcauseIwantt of
uckyoubut
notnow. ”
Esigr
abbedthetowel t
henlookedatitbr
eathless.I
t
washardandstandingalli
nitsgl
ory.Shereached
fori
tandstr
okeditslowlyashegroanedsoftly.
“
Don’
tst
artwhaty
oucan’
tfi
nish.
”
Shegotmor
ewetasshest
rokedi
twat
chi
ngal
lthe
v
einspoppi
ngout
.
“Idon’
twanttosleepwithyouthenfal l
foryoumore
thanIhavealr
eadyfall
en,af
terthatthenyougoback
toyourhusband.Idon’
twanttot ur
ni ntoapsycho
becauseonceIsleepwithyouIam pr obabl
ygoing
tofall
inl
ove.”
Shelookedathi
m bi
tingherl
owerli
pasthetip
oozed,shecoul
dalr
eadyimaginei
tsqueezi
ngin.
“
Letgoofmydi ckifyouknowy ousti
l
l wanttofi
x
y
ourmar r
iageandy ouar
ejustdoingthi
storeli
eve
y
oursel
fthestress.Keagokopa.Iam al r
eadyweak,
j
usthavemercyonmyhear tandlet’
senjoythisl
ike
f
ri
ends.Myhear tisf r
agi
l
e.”
Shegotof fbedthenkneltdownandopenedher
mout hsuckingt
het i
pofhisdick.Seancl
osedhi
s
eyesatthesensation,hermouthwassowar m.He
grabbedherhairandgent l
ytappedhert
hroat
grunti
ng.
Hisgrunt
stur
nedheronsomuchshef oundhersel
f
rubbi
nghercl
it
.Heslidi
toutgi
vi
nghermomentt o
breat
hethenwentbacki
nandfuckedhermouth.Esi
rel
axedherjawsgaggi
ngwhil
ebreat
hingt
hrough
hernose.Shemassagedhi
sball
s.
Seanpull
edherupwi t
hherhairandputheront
he
bed,onelegonhisshoul
der.Hestr
okedhisdi
ck
star
ingatherpussyand#removed.

*
**
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#66
#r
emov
ed

Seanpulledherupwi t
hherhai randputheront he
bed,onelegonhi sshoul
der.Hest r
okedhisdi ck
stari
ngatherpussyandSeanpul ledherupwi thher
hairandputheront hebed,onel egonhi sshoul der
.
Hest r
okedhi sdickstari
ngatherpussyandr ubbed
i
tbackandf or t
honherpussyl ips, hisheart
pounding,herubbedt hetipatherent rancethen
reachedforthecondom andt orei tbeforeforcingit
onhisdick.Itcoveredhalfhisdi ckt henhefinally
pushedt hroughblockingherpat hway .Heslidhi
s
dickallt
hewayi n,herwarmt hthreateningtodo
undohi mr i
ghtawayasherpussycl utchedhim.He
watchedasherst omachl i
ftedwhi l
eshel ookedat
him,takingitli
keabi ggir
l,herchestr i
singand
fall
i
ng.Hel ookedatf ace,hefinall
yhadherandhe
wasgoi ngt omakei tworthit.
Esimoanedsof tl
yashesl idoutandpushedt hrough
againfi
lli
ngherupalmostknocki ngheroutofbr eath.
Hermoansgothi sdi
ckev enharder,whatwast hat
sayingofsleepi
ngwiththewomany ouloved?
Yeah…t hemomentf eltoutofthi
swor ld.Hegent l
y
tappedthatpussystari
ngatitstret
chgr ippi
nghis
dickwit
heacht hrust
.Shef el
tsogoodhedug
deeperandwat chedhermoansof t
lyasherbr east
bounced.
Hest artedmov i
ngfaster
,mov i
nghiswai
stchanging
angles,gr unti
ngwitheachtapasherpussygotmor e
wet.Hel etgoofherlegandr odehergr
untingi
nher
ear.Esi moanedmeet i
nghim half
waywhile
caressinghi sback.Dickfel
tsogoodshef ound
herselfenj oy
ingitsomuchsheev enmovedmor e
beneat
hhim.Thef
ict
ionofhi
sdi
ckr
ubbi
ngonher
wall
sfel
tsogood.
Theybr eathedheav i
l
y,moansandgr untsfi
ll
ingthe
room ast heirmethalfway,l
ipslockedoneachot her
astheypour edt hei
rsoulsontoeachot her,
their
bodiesclappi ngagai
nstoneanot her.Eachthrust
hadt hem gett i
ngweakwi t
hpleasure.
Esil
ockedherl
egsar
oundhi
swaistasshef
eltal
l
ki
ndsofsort
swhil
ehebreat
hedheavi
l
yontopofher
.
Feeli
ngclosetocummi ng,Seanpull
edherfrom the
bedashisdi ckwavedaround.Heturnedheraround
i
nt hemiddleoftheroom andbendedheralitt
le
holdi
ngherar msthenpushedthrough.
Esi
’seyeswi
denedasthatdi
ckwentevenmore
deeper
,shemovedlet
ti
nganinchout
.“Shi
t!
Seanpul l
edherclosersli
dingi
talli
n.Esi heldher
breathtry
ingtotakeitli
keabigashest arted
thrusti
ngintoher,
hisbackcurved.Hef uckedev en
harder,shetookast epforwardwithaf rownasa
sharppainst r
uck,ni
ggawasr elent
less,fuckingher
i
ntot omorrow,notslowingdownandnotgi v
inga
f
uck.
Hef ollowedherf uckingherharderandhar der ,
grunting.Sheopenedt hesli
dingdoort owal koutbut
hepul ledherbackast hecoldbreezehitherski n
maki nghershi verwhiletheystoodbyt hedoor .They
bot hlookedintothedar knessasshegotf ucked.Esi
relaxedherbodyt henmoanedsof tyasitgotnice.
Seandr i
ll
edintoherundi st
urbed,thepleasurehe
wasget t
ingwassomuchhel ostallhi
scont rol
.His
breathinggotheav i
erandmor eragged, Esiclosed
herey esmoani ngouthi sname, thepleasure
blowingherf rom allsides.
Seanheardfootst
epsthenhepull
edbackclosi
ng
thesli
ddoorfucki
ngherreal
l
yhard.Esi’
sconvul
sed
moani ngl
ouderasSeanburi
edhimselfsodeep
freezi
ngwhil
efil
li
ngupthecondom.
Heki
ssedherneck.
“
Shi
tIl
oveher
…”
Esisi
ghedashesl i
doutthentookoffthecondom.
Heturnedheraroundsuppor
tingherbodythen
ki
ssedher.Helookedatthetearsi
nhereyesthen
theyrol
leddownhercheeks.Hewipedt
hem offand
kissedherpi
cki
ngherupasi fshewasnot
hing.
“
Youar
ebeaut
if
ul…andIwanty
ouagai
n.”
Hel
oweredheronhi
ssemi
har
ddi
ckandwenti
nfor
t
hesecondr
ound.
.
.
.
Namet solookedasRebaonefixedthem somethi
ng
toeat.Hestayedinaoneroom butitalmosthad
every
thing,abed,f
ri
dge,TV,speakers.Heevenhad
acarpet.Hedishedforbot
hoft hem andhandedher
aplate.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
Hesatbesi
deher
.“Sohowol
dar
eyoursi
bli
ngs?
”
“
Myyoungersi
steris21,
shehasat
hreey
earol
d.
Mybr
otheri
s13y earsol
d.”
“
Yoursist
ercantakecar
eofyourbrotherwhi
l
eyou
l
ookforajob.Iam at
axidr
overbutIhaveadegr
ee.
”
Hegotupandt
ooki
tthenhandedi
ttoher
.
“See?ProofthatIwenttoschool forfullfouryears
studyi
ngbuther eIam.Ihav eneverwor kedaf ter
graduati
on.Notev enl
i
kef oramont h, IthinkIhave
evenforgott
enwhatIlearnt.Somet i
mesIl ookatit
andjustsighbecauseIwast edmyt ime.Iusedt o
haveacarwash, y
ouwilldoitall
formoney ,t
hat’
s
howIr ai
sedthemoneyt obuymyf i
rsttaxi.Right
nowi fIt elly out hatImakemor ethanP8000a
mont hwoul dy oubel ieveme?Ihav eschool st
udent s
thatIpi ckanddr opof f,theyar e7r ightnow.The
othert hreegot ot hesameschool ,twomor egoi ng
totheschool af ternextt othatone.Ther emai ning
twoal sogot ooneschool .Ipickanddr op, pickmor e
anddr opt henIhav et wol adiesIdr opof fatwor k
everymor ning.Af tert hatIgot ot her ank, from the
rank,Ipi ckupt hest udent s.Thenatt heendoft he
day, t
het wol adies.Imanagemyt imesot hat
everyoner emai nshappy .Icanaf fordst ay inginabi g
housej ustt hatIam bui l
dingmyhousesoal lt
he
moneygoest her e.Butt hepoi ntisIdi dn’ tst ar
tt here.
Istartedcr yingj ustl ikey ouar ecr ying.Iusedt ol i
ve
withmymom.I magi nemot hoat sogamapakel a,ke
eneowaomanahel a.(Imagi nesomeonewaki ngup
i
nt hemor ningt hent hereshei sshout ing. )Youhear
thi
ngsl i
keel ect ri
cityi sjustf i
nishingandsome
peoplecan’ tev encont r
ubut enot hing.Wheny ouar e
eating, youhearkanasomeonl yknowhowt oeat .”
Hel aughed.“ Wheny out ryt olaughatamemeon
facebookt or eli
ev ey ourselfthest ressy ouhear ,
ebil
ewat segaosaber eki,(Youar eev enl aughi ng
whennotwor
king.
)It
’sl
i
key oushoul
dn’
tlaugh
becausey
ouareunemploy
ed.”
Namet
sol
aughed.
“Thenyoust artpiecej obs,somepeacej obsare
j
ust…thingsy ouwoul dn’tdoonanor mal basi
sbut
becauseyouwantt hatP50t oatl eastbuymeatat
home, y
ouj ustdoi t.Iusedt ocleanhousest i
l
lis
star
tedthecarwash.Ther eisapoi ntwher eIwas
evenabuilder.Idon’ tbuildbutIlearnthowt o.You
evenfeell
ikebur ningy ourdegreebecauseev ery
ti
mey ouseei t,yougetangr y.
”
Theysmi
l
ed.
“Butthat’
slif
e.Forsomeofusi t’shar dthenf or
somepeopl eit’
sli
kel uckfoll
owst hem ar ound.They
alwaysgetwhat evertheywant ,youev enst art
thi
nkingtheyareGod’ sfavori
teandwenay ouwer e
probablybroughtbymi stake.Youwi l
lthinkgor e
may beGodmadey ousot hatyoucanbeSat an’stoy,
theonehesmashesar ound.Butt hat’
sj ustlife
Namet soandy oujusthav etofindawayt ot ackleit
.
Showy ourbrotherthatyoucanst i
llstri
ve. ”
Nametsowipedawayat eart henRebaonesmi l
ed.
“Buti
fwearebeinghonest,Idon’tthinkyouwould
hir
ethi
sKennypersonifyouwer einhershoes.You
tri
edsnat
chingherman.It
’sunder standabl
ethatshe
keepsyoufarawayfr
om her .Atthisstage,
inher
eyesyouareasnake.
”
Namet
sonodded.“
Yes.
”
“Iam goi
ngtogiv
ey ouastar
t,Ineedacleanerhere.
Inevergetti
metowashmycl othesordoany thi
ng.
Youwi l
lcl
eanmyhouseandwashf ormef ora
monthwhi l
eyoutr
yf i
ndi
ngsomet hi
ng.Youcanst ay
withme, y
ouwil
lusethecouch.Howi sthat?
”
Namet
sosmi
l
ed.“
Howmuchar
ewet
alki
ngabout
?”
“
P1500.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Iwi
l
lal
sohel
pyoul
ookf
oraj
ob.
”
“
Thanky
ousomuch.
”
“
Ihavecr
azybabymama,shemightcometoharass
meorsomethi
ng,t
hat
’st
heperksofworki
ngfor
me.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
“
Ok,
theni
tssor
ted.Eat
.”

*
**

Thef
oll
owi
ngmorni
ng,KennypackedQuinton’sbag
asQtol
dhi
sfat
herabouthi
sswimmi ngclasses.
“
Qfi
nishup.Ihav
eamor
ningmeet
ing.
”
Ronasmil
edathert
henst
oodupwit
hhisempty
pl
ateandputi
tint
hesi
nkbef
orepul
l
ingheri
nfora
ki
ss.
“
Ameet
ingwi
thwho?
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Wit
hmyboss.
”
“
Iam goi
ngt
odr
ophi
m of
ftodayatTsabong.
”
“
Ithoughti
twast
omor
row.
”
“
No.Today
,itmeansIwi
l
lseey
our
eal
l
ylat
e.”
“
Ok.DidApri
lgetyouarepl
acement
?Kanababe
mabaneyouwon’tbel
i
evewhocamef ort
he
i
nter
view.
”
“
Who?
”
“Nametso,themomentshesawmeshest artedwi
th
hersobstories,
tear
sandall
.Ifel
tsadforherbutI
won’thi
rethatsnaketoworkforme.Shewoul d
probabl
yspikemycof f
ee.
”
Ronachuckl
ed.“
Thatwasagoodcal
l.Youcan’
t
havesomeoneyoucan’
ttr
ustasy
ourPA.”
“
DidApr
ilf
indy
ousomeone?
”
“
Yes,
shest
art
stoday
.”
“
ThankGod,
okby
e,l
etmedr
opof
fthi
sone.
”
Heki
ssedher.“
Ican’
twai
tforust
ohav
ethehouse
t
ooursel
ves.
”
“Metoo.Mot
hooomodomo.(
Thi
sper
soni
snoi
sy.
)
Q,l
et’
sgo.Il
ovey
ou.
”
Ronasmi
l
edwat
chi
ngt
hem wal
kout
.

*
**
Ronaparkedhi
scarthenwalkedi
nsi
det
hebui
l
ding,
Atsi
l
erushedoverandwalkedwit
hhi
m.
“
Whatam Ihear
ing?Esi
ischeat
ing?
”
“
Ihear
dso,gatweoi l
eTanzani
akamothakao
mongweyana.(appar
ent
lyshewentt
oTansani
a
wi
thsomeguy .
)”
“
Esi
?“
“Yes.Shei
spr
obabl
ygett
ingfuckedal
lsor
tsofway
.
AhhIwouldki
l
lsomeone,notwit
hmywoman. .
”
“
Andhewi
l
lpr
obabl
yleav
eheral
ldamaged.
”
Thevt
wobr
other
sgoti
ntheel
evat
ori
nthei
rsui
ts.
“
Maat
lai
slosi
ngi
t,hei
stal
ki
ngaboutki
l
li
ngher
.”
“
Icanunder
standhowhefeel
s.Imagi
nehowIf
elt
whenBoi
neel
ogotmarri
edbehindmyback.
”
Ronal
aughed.“
Therewasnof utur
ewi
tht
hatgi
rl
.
Shewasn’
teventhatbeaut
if
ul.
”
“Kanasheev enmademewaiteventhoughshewas
notavir
gin.Sheli
edtomeandwhenwehadsexI
wasjustsurpri
sedandshej
ustsai
dahh,Idi
dn’t
knowhowt
otel
lyou.
”
Theelevat
ordoorssl
idopenthentheywalkedout
l
aughing.Theybothl
ookedatthegir
lwhowas
tal
kingtoApri
li
napencilsski
rtandwhit
e-shi
rt
tuckedi
n.Shetuckedherweavebehindasthey
walkedpasther.
“
Dammi
t!Kemangeneo?(
Whoi
sshe?
)”
Tt
heywal
kedi
nhi
sof
fi
ce.“
Ithi
nkmynewPA.
”
Atsi
lewhi
stl
edshaki
nghishead.“
Nowt
hat
’sar
eal
beauty
!Andsheissexyt
oo.Yeer!
”
“St
opf i
l
li
ngmyheadwi
thnonsense.Apr
ili
s
outsi
de.”
Atsi
lelaughed.“
Letmel
eave.Theot
herdayIwas
accusedforstar
ingt
oomuchatawaiter
,letmego.
”
HewalkedoutthenApr i
lwal kedinwit
hthewoman.
Ronalookedatherasshei nnocentlyl
ookedbackat
him,f
earinhereyes.Heleanedbackonhi schairas
theywalkedf
urt
herin,Apri
l smiled.
“UhMr.Motsamai,
thisi
sYaoneMopedi
,thenewPA.
Ihav
einter
viewedherandshei
sagoodfit.Isent
youherresume,shei
sgoingtostar
ttoday
,Itook
herthr
oughwhatsheissupposedtobedoingand
sheisonboard.Shehaslear
ntal
lsheneedstolear
n
aboutyouandsheisready.
”
“I
t’
sanhonort
owor kf
ory
ouMrMot
samai
,I
promi
setodel
iver
.”
Apr
il
’sphoner
angt
henshel
ookedatRona.
“
Theyneedmeatmyof
fi
ce.Hav
eagoodday
.”
Shewalkedoutt
henYaonelookedatRona,
shewas
l
it
eral
l
yshakingbutshewasn’
tgoingt
oshowit.
“Iwil
lgoandprepar
emydesk,MsLaol
angwi
l
lbe
herein20minutesf
orhermeet
ing.
”
“
Howol
dar
eyou?
”
“
23y
ear
sol
d.”
Shetur
nedandwalkedoutt
henputherhandsonher
facesi
tt
ingonherdesk.
“
Fuck!You’
vegott
hisYaone!
”

*
**
InTanzania,
Seangav eEsit
helastst
rokethen
sti
l
ledfil
li
ngupt hecondom whi
leshebreathed
heavi
ly.Hekissedherthensmil
ed.
“
Hey
…”
Shebl
ushed.“
Hey
..
”
“
Readyf
ort
oday
?”
Shenoddedsmili
ng.Seangaveheranot
herki
sst
hen
gotof
fhertaki
ngofthecondom.
“
Maat
lasai
dhei
sgoi
ngt
oki
l
lme.
”
Seanl
ookedather
.“Hecanonl
ytr
y.Come,
let
’st
ake
ashower
.”
Hepickedherupthr
owingheruphi
sshoul
dert
hen
wal
kedtothebathr
oom whi
leshegi
ggl
ed.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#67

EsiwalkedwithSeanashecar r
iedahiki
ngbagon
hi
sback.Shel ookedathim whi
lehechattedwit
ha
whitemanast heyhikedupthemountain.She
stoppedlooki
ngaroundbreathi
ngheavil
y.
“Thi
sisjustext
raordi
nary
.”Awhit
ewomansai
d
smil
ingather.Esi
smiledback.
“
Iti
sisn’
tit
?”
“
Magni
fi
cent
.”
Esiopenedherbot t
leofwaterst
ari
ngatSeanashe
l
aughedwi ththewhit
eman.Amanwhohad
i
ntroducedhimselff
rom Zambiajoi
nedi
nt he
conversat
ion,Seanl
ookedsocuteashelistenedto
theZambianmanspeak.Shet ookherphonet hen
captur
edapi ctur
eashelaughed.
Ifshehaddoubtedit,nowshewastotal
lyconvi
nced
therewassomethingabouthimthatmadehersmi l
e
andf eel
youngagain.Theexci
tementhebrought
tookherbacktohert
eenageyears.Heturnedtoher
assheputbackherphoneinherpocketthenwinked.
Secondslat
erhewalkedoverandkissedher.
“
Hey
…yougood?
”
Shenodded.“
Thi
sisbeaut
if
ul.
”
Hehuggedfr
om behi
ndwrappi
nghi
sar
msar
ound
her
.“I
tis…ar
eyoutir
ed?
”
“No.Mybodyi
sjustget
ti
ngusedt
onotbei
ngl
azy
anymor
e.”
“
Letmepi
ggy
backy
ou.
”
“
No,
youar
egoi
ngt
ogett
ir
ed.
”
Hest
oodi
nfr
ontofherandl
ower
edhi
msel
f.
“
Hopon.
”
Shel
aughedget
ti
ngonhisbackt
henhe
st
rai
ght
enedupwalki
ngwit
hher.
“
Thi
sfeel
sni
ce.
”
Theywalkedbesideotherhiker
sgoingup.Esil
ooked
aroundt
hensi ghedhappil
y,shecouldn’
tremember
whenshel astfel
tli
kethi
s.Sherestedherheadon
hi
sshoul
dersi
ngi
ngsof
t.
“Baby,
Icomparey
out oakissfr
om ar
oseont he
gray…ohhthemoreIgetofyou,t
hest
rangeri
tfeel
s
yeah.
.”
Seanlaughedatherhorri
blevoi
cet
henj
oinedheras
theymadet hei
rowndiscord.
“Andnowt hatyourr
osei
sinbl
oom,
ali
ghthi
tst
he
gloom i
nthegray…”
Esi
laughedashewentonsi
ngi
ng.
“
Ba-
da-
da,
ba-
da-
da-
da-
dam ba-
da-
da…”
“
Youar
ehor
ri
ble.
”
Seanl
aughed.“
Iam bet
tert
hany
ou.Yousoundasi
f
youar
ebeingstr
angl
ed.
”
Shesmil
ed.“
That’
snothowIsoundedl
astni
ght
whenyouhadyourhandsar
oundmyneck.”
Seant
urnedhi
sheadt
hensheki
ssedhi
scheek.
“Icant
akeyoubackr
ightnowandt
esti
fyouwon’
t
soundli
ket
hat.
”
Shebl
ushedt
hensi
ghedhappi
l
yast
heycont
inued
up.

I
nDarEsSal aam, Maatlaheldhisphoneconnected
t
oai r
por
tWi Ficheckingifshehadpostedanythi
ng
yetbutt
herewasnot hi
ng.Helookedaroundwaiting
f
orthenextlightthatwouldtakehimtoKili
manjaro.
Hehadn’tsl
eptlastnightandtil
lnowallhwcould
t
hinkwaswhatshecoul dpossiblybedoi
ng.

*
**

Kennywal kedoutofRona’ soffi

cepassingbyhis
newPA’ sdesk, shelookedatherbr i
efl
yandsmi led
makingherwaybackt oheroffice.Shewasn’tabout
tomadei nsecurebyhisPAt houghherl ooksdi
dn’ t
gopasther .Shesatonherchai rstar
ingatthefi
les
i
nf r
ontofherf orawhi l
ethencalledthenumberMi a
hadcall
edherwi t
hlastnight
.Itrangtwiceandgot
answered.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hi,
youar
espeaki
ngt
oKenny
,Mi
a’
ssi
ster
.”
“
Oh,
hi.
”
“
Hi,
didshemanaget
ocol
l
ectt
hemoney
?”
“
Yes.Idi
ditf
orherl
astni
ght
.”
“
Thanky
ousomuch.Iappr
eci
atey
ourhel
p.”
“
It
’sok,
any
time.
”
“
CanIcal
lyoul
ateronsoIcanspeakt
oher
?”
“
Ok.
”
“
Thanks.
”
Shehungupandsi ghedrel
ievedbuthert houghts
wentt oKefi
lwe.Shehadnev ercall
edtocheckupon
herwhenshewasi npri
son, Kennycouldn’t
understandwhyshehat edhersomuch.May beit
wast hefactthatshewasbor nwhenKef il
wewas
sti
ll
youngbutt hatwasagesagoandi twasn’ ther
faul
tthatshewasbor n.Shedi dn’
tchooset obebor n.
Shethought
ful
l
ycal
l
edherphone,t
hephonerang,
i
nter
esti
nghowshehadn’
tchangedhernumberi
nall
they
ears.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Isentr
entmoneyt
oMi
a.Ihear
dthel
andl
ordl
ocked
t
hedoors.
”
“
ObatangKenei
l
we?( Whatdoyouwant?
)Iam i
nthe
middl
eofsomet
hing.Idi
dn’
taskyout
osendthat
money.”
“
Iwasj
ustt
ell
i
ngy
ou.Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?
”
“Iam f
ine,
sincey
oucamebackfr
om j
ail
younev
er
bother
edtocheckonme,whybot
hernow?”
“
Iwasj
ust
-“
“
Don’
tbothery
oursel
f.Youwantt
ogoaroundt
ell
i
ng
mymotherhowIkeeptakingy
ourmoney?
”
Shesi
ghed.“
Um ok,
Iguessy
ouar
efi
ne.
”
“
YesKenei
l
weIam f
ine.
”
“
Whydoy
ouhat
emesomuch?Whatdi
dIdot
o
y
ou?
”
“Your
uinedmylif
ethat’
swhy !Idon’
thavet
imef
or
youKeneil
we.Wantena,(Youarepissi
ngmeoff
,)no
oneaskedyouforyourmoney .
”
“Iam nott
heonewhot ol
dy outosleepwit
hmar ri
ed
ment hengetdumpedwithababy !Youhavea
grandson…canwejustworkonourr el
ati
onshi
p.Mi a
i
sal lgr
ownandIdon’tev
enknowherbecausey ou
keptheraway.Shei
smysi sterf
orcryi
ngoutloud.”
“Youwantt oknowt het r
ut h?Letmet el
l yout he
truth.Iwasaf ocusedst udentKenei l
we.Iwasv ery
smar tatschool .Iusedt opass, y oubei nga
dunder headdoesn’ tcomef rom me.Mi aissmar t
,
l
ikeme.Ihaddr eams, vi
sions, goals.Iwant edso
muchi nl i
fe.Iwasgoi ngtogoov erseasf orschool .
Thatwast heplan.Iwoul dnev erhav esl eptwi tha
mar ri
edmandoy ouhearme?Ihaddr eams
Kenei l
we. ”Shesni f
fed.“Iwoul dhav enev erlookedat
mar ri
edmanbecauset herewasamanIl oved
already .Yourfatherwasar apist.Iwaspassi ngby
hishousef rom school ,
hecal l
edi nt hehouse, said
hissonhadl ef
tsomebooks, nov el
s, Ili
kedr eadi ng
soIwenti nandhef orcedhi msel fonme.Noone
believedwhenIt oldthem her appedme.ThemanI
l
ov edl eftme.Ev eryonethoughtIsl eptwi tha
mar ri
edmanandhedumpedme.Iwant edtoki l
lyou!
Iwantedy out odie.Butmymot herr efused.Iwoul d
havegiveny ouupf oradopt i
onbutsher efusedand
tookyoui n.Afterthatshet riedt of or cemet olove
you.Itr
iedt okill
y oubuty ouj ustwoul dn’tdie.I
hatedyousomuchandIst il
l do.Your uinedmyl i
fe.I
hateyouandIwi shy oucandi eandj ustdi sappear
from t
hisear t
h.Youar et hewor stthi ngthathasev er
happent ome, theyf or cedmet ot akecar eofy ou.I
hateyouKenei lwe, Ihat ey ousomuchi tev enhurts
becauseev erytimeIseey ourf ace, Iseehi m.You
l
ookl i
kehi m.Youl ookl i
ket hatr apist.You…y oulook
l
ikehim andIhat ey ourf ace, Ihat et haty ouar esti
ll
breat
hing.Ipraydayandni ghtf ory ourdeat h
becausey ouaconst antr emi nderofmypai n.At
l
eastifyouwer edead, Iwoul dmov eonbutt hatwi l
l
neverhappenbecausey oukeepbr eat hi
ng. ”
Kennyputherhandov
erhermout
hcr
ying.
“Goaheadandcr y,Maybey oumi ghtkill
yoursel
f
whil
eatit.Don’
tcallmey ourmot her,Iam notyour
mother.Ihaveneverbeeny ourmot her.Youwill
neverbemydaught er.St
ayawayf r
om mydaught er
,
Idon’twantyouassociat
ingwi t
hherdoy ouhear
Kenei
l
we?Stayawayf
rom mychi
l
d!St
ayawayf
rom
myfamil
y!
”
Kefil
wehungup,Kennyputherphonedownandput
herhandsonherfacecryi
ng.Shegaspedfi
ghti
ngto
breatheaspai
nsmot her
edher.Acol
leaguewalked
i
nandl ookedatherasshegaspedcryi
ng.
“
Kenny
!Ar
eyouok?
”
“
Ican’
tbr
eat
he…”
“
Kenny
!”
Shefelloffherchairgaspi
ngt r
yingt obreatheasshe
conti
nuouslyhitherchest.Hercolleaguer ushedout
thencamebackwi thaglassofwat er.Shefoundher
l
y i
ngont hefloorunconsciousthenpour edwat eron
herface.
“
Kenny
!Kenny
!”
ShepouredmorebutKennyremaineduncoci
ous.
ShegrabbedKenny’
soff
icephoneanddial
edMr .
Motsamai’
soffi
ce.
“
Mr.Mot
samai
’
sof
fi
cehel
l
o,t
hisi
sYaone.
”
“
Yaone,
cany
oui
nfor
m Mr
.Mot
samai
thatKenny
col
l
apsedher
e.”
“
Hei
sinameet
-“
“Yaone!Tell
himthatKennyhascoll
apsed.I
t’
s
i
mpor tant
.Hisgi
rl
fri
endhascoll
apsed.Weareinher
offi
ce.
”
“
Ok.
”

*
**

Yaonegotupfrom herchai
randwalkedin
i
nterr
upt
inghismeetingwit
hashareholder
.He
fr
ownedstar
ingather .
“Iam sorr
yMr.Mot
samai
butKennyhascol
l
apsedi
n
heroffi
ce..
”
Hequi
ckl
ygotup.“
What
?”
“
Yes.
”
Ronal
ookedatt
heshar
ehol
der
.
“
Myf
iancé,
canwer
eschedul
ethi
s?”
“
Ofcause.
”
Her ushedoutgoingtoheroff
icehol
dinghi
scar
keysandf oundherbeingcar
ri
edout.Hetookheri
n
hisarms.
“
Whathappenedt
oher
?”
“
Ifoundhergaspi
ngf
orai
rcr
ying.
”
Her
ushedwi
thheroutt
ohi
scar
.

*
**

InShakawe, Lesegotri
edKenny ’snumberagai nbut
i
tj ustrangunanswer ed.Herhear twaspoundi ngso
much, shewasev enshaking,shet urnedbackt othe
oldwomanasshel ayonherbedl ookingup, eyes
closed.Herbodyhadgonecol d.Lesegoswal lowed
wonder i
ngwhathadhappened, theyhadsl eptso
l
at easshet ol
dherallthestor
iesofherl if
et i
me.It
hadbeenni cetoseeherr emember i
ngalmost
ever y
thingbutnowi tmadesense, May beGodhad
madeherr emembersoshecandi einpeace.Unsur e
ofwhatt odo,shetookherbel
ongi
ngsthenwalked
outaftersendingKennyamessage.Shewasonl ya
hel
per, surel
yshewasn'texpect
edtocarefordead
bodiest oo.Thescenealr
eadyscar
edher.She
walkedf asterl
eavi
ng.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#68

Att
hehospit
al,
RonastoodbyKennywhowasnow
awake,
hissl
eevesf
olded.
“
Shesai
dthatt
oyou.
”
Kennytear
ful
l
ynodded.“Iam arapepr
oduct
.No
wondershehatesme.Idon’
tblameher.
”
“Youdidn’
tdoany
thi
ng,
youdi
dn’
tchooset
obe
born.
”
Tearsfil
l
edhereyes.“Idi
dn’
tbutIam aconst
ant
reminderofwhathappenedtoher.Iwoul
dhateme
too.
”
Ronar ubbedat
eart
hathadhadrol
l
eddownher
cheek.Thedoct
orwalkedi
nthensi
ghedl
ooki
ngat
them both.
“Yousuff
eredapanicattack,
it’
snothi
ngser
iousand
canbecont r
oll
ed.Buty
oushoul dnowbecareful
becausetherei
ssomethingelse.”
“
What
?”
Thedoct
orsmil
ed.“
Congr
atul
ati
ons!Youar
eabout
thr
eeweekspr
egnant.
”
Kennyl
ookedatherconf
used.“
What
?”
“
Yes.Youar
eexpect
ing.
”
Sheputherhandoverhermouthrecal
li
nghershot
!
Shehadmisseditt
hendecidedtoreschedul
ebut
shegotsobusyshe…
“
No…”
Ronalookedatherandcl
ear
edhisthroatunsur
eif
thatwastheri
ghtti
metoshowjusthowhappyhe
was.
“
Youneedtost
artl
ooki
ngafteryour
selfbecause
y
ouarecar
inganot
herl
if
einsideyou.
”
Kenny’sl
ipstr
embledthensheputherhandsov
er
herfacecryi
ng.Ronapull
edheri
nhisarmsand
huggedherasshecr i
edonhischest
.
“
Wearegoingt
obef
ine,
wewi
l
ldeal
wit
hit
t
oget
her
.”
Hekissedherf
oreheadrubbi
ngherbackasshe
cri
ed.Awhil
elat
erhesatont hebedassheusedt
he
toi
let
.Hetookouthisr
ingi
ngphone.
“
Mal
ome.
.(
Uncl
e..
)”
“Rona,soy
ouar
ereadyf
ort
hisnextbi
gst
epmy
boy?”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Yes.
”
“
Yourfat
hersay
sit
’st
hesamegi
rlwhost
abbed
y
ou.”
Ronal aughedandwalkedoutoft
her
oom.“I
fshe
hadn’tfoundmeinthatposi
ti
onshewoul
dnothave
stabbedme. ”
“Ihopey
oureal
l
yloveher,
wedon’
twantt
ogoand
paymagadi
thennextt
hingobuabodi
vor
ce.
”
Ronashookhishead.“ Sheistheone,Icanfeel i
t.I
l
ov ehersomuchsomet i
mesIcat chmy sel
fday
dreamingaboutherevent houghsheisinthesame
buil
dingasme.Idon’tthinkanyonecanev erbe
enoughbecauseIwillcompar ethem.MalomeKenny
i
s…”Hesi ghedsmil
ing.“Youwoul dn’
tunderstand.”
Hisucl el aughed.“ Iwasoncecr azyinl ov ewi tht hi
s
otherwoman.Noty ouraunt .Ev eryti
meIwoul dsee
thisot herwoman, myhear twoul dalway sski p,my
hear twoul dbeatsof astasi fIwasseei ng
somet hingext raor dinary ,gol emaswe.( itwasbad. )
Irememberwhenshesai dy est ome…Iwoul dhav e
per sonallywentt ot hankGodi fIcould.Ev er yt i
meI
waswi thher ,itfeltmagi cal andshewaspr ettyle
ene.Ler at olethuny a.(Thel ovewasbl oomi ng. )Then
Iwentaway ,
Ihadf oundaj ob.Ir ememberhowshe
criedwi shingshecoul dgowi thmebutIpr omi sed
herIwoul dcomebackandmar ryher.WhenIgott he
j
ob, moneyst artedf lowingi n.thensodi dgi rls.I
star t
edsl eepingwi thdi f
f erentwomant henone
nightIcamef rom wor kwi thoneofmygi rlfri
ends, I
foundhersi t
ti
ngont hebedwai ti
ngf orme.You
shoul dhav eseenhowshecr ied,byt henIhad
i
mpr egnat edt wodi fferentwoman.Thenshel eft,
shel eftandnev erl ookedback, Itri
edget tingher
backbutshewasov erit.Shegotmar r
iedt osome
guyandhadki ds,Icr iedl ikeal itt
lebabyf ort he
l
ongestt ime.Ti llt
oday ,Ist il
l t
hinkofher .Idr eam
her .SoIunder standhowy ouf eel.Don’tloseher
becausetrustme, get
ti
ngoverherwi
llbethe
hardestt
hingy oucaneverdo.Somet
imesy oudon’
t
evenmeant ohur therj
ustt
hatyoufi
ndy our
sel
fin
certai
nsi
tuations.
”
“
Ist
hewomanst
il
lmar
ri
ed?
”
“
Yes.Andshei
shappy
.”
“
Idon’
tthi
nkIwoul
dsur
viv
eifIl
ostKenny
.”
“Thenmakesur eyoudon’tloseher.Kanawheny ou
l
ov eher,not
hingel
semat tersexpecther.Youwoul
d
doany t
hingforher
,justdon’tl
etherknowy ouwould
dieforher.Womant endtolerthatgettothei
r
heads.”
Theybot
hlaughed.
“Butgetmar ri
edknowi ngnoonei sperf
ect .Get
mar ri
edknowi ngi nmar ri
ageyouneedmor ejust
l
ov e.Yesy oulov eher,
y ouprobabl
ycan’tthink
properlybecauseofherbutknowwheny ouar enow
mar ri
edt oher,itwil
lbemor ethanjustl
ov e.Itwil
lbe
alotoft hings.
”
“
Iam r
eady
.”
“That’swhatIwantt ohear .Anddon’ tdoy our
brother’
sshenani gans.Letmet elly
ouasecr et,men
whocheatnev ergett obet hatsuccessf ul.Cheating
delayssuccess.I nsteadofbui ldingyourlegacy
togethersidebysi de,youar econst antl
yfighti
ng,
distr
actionsleft,
rightandcent er.Whil
eot her
couplesar edoinggr eaterthingst oget
hery ouare
busyt ryi
ngtokeepbot hwomenhappy .Letmet ell
youmyboy ,amanwhohasagoodwi feinallsenses
byhi ssidewi l
lal
way sgof ar.Awomancant hink,I
don’tbelieveawomani st heneckwhi l
eIam t he
head, sheistheheadbecausehonest l
yshet hinks
betterthanme.Mmabocant hinkoutoft hebox, she
canseef armuchaheadt hanIcan, Iam theneck
andIam notshyt oadmi tit.
”
Theyl
aughed.
“I
nsteadofdiscussi
ngnewpr oj
ects,youarefi
ghting
overwhowascal li
ngsol at
eatni ght.I
nst
eadof
holdinghandssupport
ingeachot herinevery
decision,y
ouaresti
llt
ryi
ngtoexpl aingor
ef emale
bestieormalebesti
eisjustinnocent.Whil
eot her
coupl esar
emakingloveatnight,fucki
nginallsorts
ofposi ti
ons, wenay ouar estil
ltryingt ocal lback
sidechi cki
nt hebat hroom whi l
ey ourwi feis
sleeping.Youwi l
lneverenj oyyourmar r
iagebecause
i
t’salway sfightsandnowy ouar est ucki nt hesame
position.Youragemat esar edoi ngsomuchgr eati
n
l
ifewhi lewenay ouar estil
ldri
vingt hatsamecar
doingt hesamenonsense.I tshoul dn’tbel iket hat.I
f
youl oveKennyt hewayy ousayy oul oveher ,
know
afterhoney moonst agekanal egobi t
saeng, youar e
goingt oneedt oputinthatwor ki ntoy ourmar riage.
Makei twork.Don’ tbelikeMaat la, youcan’ tbe
successf ulwheny ouaret r
y i
ngt oj i
gglebet weent wo
families.Hemi ghtbeget ti
ngal otofmoneyendof
mont hbutnowt hatmoneyi salreadyf inishedbef or
e
i
tcant ouchhi shandsbecauset hebi ll
sar eal ot
now. ”
“
Youar
eri
ghtaboutt
hat
.”
“Iam.Ihavebeenthere.Myboymar r
iageisexcit
ing
becauseyoumakei texci
ting.Youshoul dbeexcited
togohomet ommabo, wheny oul ookather,you
shouldf
eelyourheartdoingthingsbecausey ou
havetheri
ghtf
ulingredi
entsiny ourmar r
iage.Kneel
andpr
ay,l
etGodbeinyourmarr
iage,
makeyour
wif
ehappy.Ahappywi
feisahappyhome.
”
Ronasmi
l
edl
i
steni
ng.
“Wai tti
llyouar ewear ingt hatr i
ngony ourf i
nger ,
thereissomet hingni ceaboutt hatr i
ngony our
fi
nger .Event hewaypeopl elookaty ouchanges.
Youar enowent it
ledt oacer tai
nlev elofr espect .
Youar ealsogoi ngt obepar tofthosewhoadv i
se
othermenwhoar eget t
ingmar ri
ed, thereisal evelof
respectt hatcomeswi thhav i
ngthatr i
ngony our
fi
nger ,gapesexy at engemonat e( thesexi sni ce
too)becausey ouknowy oudeser v eit.Thatpussy
willbey ours,therei snoboIam t iredt onight ,no,
youf uckhert il
lsheunder standst hatt het hing
betweenherl egsi sy oursl egall
y.Af tery ouar edone
withherandshei sbr eat hingheav il
y, youl ookat
yourr i
ngandsl eeppr oudbecausey ouar enot
commi tt
inganysi n.Thef oll
owingmor ningy ouf uck
heragai nbecausey oulookedatt hatr ingony our
fi
ngerandr emember edt hatony et seandy ouhav ea
pussyt hatiswai t
ingf ory ou.Any way s, Ihav ehear d
you.Wehav esentsomepeopl etheret ot alktot hem.
Weshoul
dbeget
ti
ngawor
dbackl
atert
oday
.”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Shar
pmyboy
.”
Ronahungupandwal
kedbacki
nther
oom.Kenny
l
ookedathi
m.
“
Wher
eismyphone?
”
“
Ithi
nki
t’
satt
heof
fi
ce.
”
“
Oh…”
Hewalkedoverandputhishandsonherwai st
l
ooki
nginhereyesthenhekissedher.“
Iloveyouso
much.Iam her
eforyou,wewi l
ldeal
withthi
s
t
ogether
.Iam goi
ngtodropy ouhome.Youshould
r
est.
”
“
Ihav
eameet
ingwi
th-
“
“Someonewillhandlei
t.Youar
egoinghometorest
.
Youarepregnant,youshoul
dn’
tbestandi
ngal
lday
l
ong.Come..”
“
Iam notsi
ckAr ona,
justpr
egnant
.It
’snotev
ena
r
eal
babyy et
,justaclot
.”
“Osekawarengwanawamekeclot
,(Don’
tsaymy
chi
ldisonl
yaclot
,)come,
youar
egoingtorest
.Ar
e
youhungry
?”
Het
ookherhandandwal
kedoutwi
thher
.
“
No.
”
“Youhavetoeat
.Mydaughteri
sprobabl
yhungr
y.I
am notgoi
ngtolety
oustar
veher.
”

*
**

Aroundl unchhour ,Nanaowal kedi nheroffi

ceatt he
boutiquet hensatdown.Shesi ppedherjuicewhile
eati
ngherchi psthentookherphoneandwenton
facebook.Shepausedcomi ngacr ossweddi ng
pict
ur eofaf ormerclassmat ethensmi l
edl i
kingthe
pict
ur es.Herey eswenttoherr ingasitgli
tteredon
herfinger ,
ther ehadn’tbeenawor dthatwentt oher
family,nothing.Justthatr i
ngonherf i
ngerandshe
wasbegi nningt ogetimpatient.
Shel
ookedatt
heweddi
ngpi
ctur
est
henl
efta
commentandcont
inuedscr
oll
i
ng.Herdooropened
thenawor
kerl
ookedather.
“
Nanao,t
her
eisacustomer,
Ihav
etogoandget
t
hator
dersoIcan’
thel
phim.”
Nanaoputdownherdr
inkthenwi
pedherhandswi
th
wiper
sbefor
ewalki
ngout.
“
What
?”
“
Him.
”
Nanaol
ookedatt
hecust
omert
hensmi
l
ed.
“
Hi,
howar
eyou?
”
Hel
ookedatherandsmiled.“
Iam l
ooki
ngf
ort
his,
ker
omil
we.(Ihavebeensent.
)”
Heshowedhert
hepi
ctur
eoft
hebi
ki
nit
henshe
smi
led.
“
Wear
elef
twi
thonyonesi
ze,
medi
um.
”
“
Yes,
exact
lywhatshewant
s.”
“
Ok,
letmegeti
tfory
ou.
”
Nanaowal
kedar
oundt
heshopt
hent
ookt
hepi
ece
andwal
kedbackwi
thi
t.
“
Therei
tis.
.shei
snotgoi
ngt
olooksogoodi
nit
t
rustme.
”
Hel
aughed.“
Shei
snotmygi
rl
fr
iend.
”
“
Waakakwa!(
li
es!
)”
Hehandedhert
hecar
dwhi
l
ehel
aughed.
“
Iam t
ell
i
ngy
ou.Yourhusbandi
sonel
uckyman.
”
Shepackedt
hepi
ecei
nashoppi
ngbag.“
Bye…”
Heturnedtoleavebutchangedhismind.“
Weshoul
d
gooutfordinnersometi
me.”Hehandedherhi
s
busi
nesscard.“Howaboutt oni
ght?
”
Nanaolookedathisnameandsmi
l
ed.“
Tsamay
a
Ronal
d.(LeaveRonal
d.)
”
“
Isy
ourhusbandasol
dier
?”
“
No.
”
“Apol
i
ceoffi
cer
?SSG?DI
S?Secr
etAgent
?Any
thi
ng
oft
hatsor
t?”
“
No.
”
“
Thendi
nnert
oni
ght
,sayar
ound7.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Idon’
tcheat
.”
“Whosai
dyouar
egoi
ngt
ocheat
?Doy
ouhav
ea
car
?”
“
No,Ronal
dkekopaot
samay
e.(
Ronal
dpl
ease
l
eav
e.)
”
“ThenIwil
lbehereat6,Iwill
picky ouup.Tellhi
m
youaredeli
ver
ingorder
s.Youguy sof ferdel
i
very,by
7y ouwil
lbeathome.It
’sjustdinner,nocheati
ng.
Deal?”
Shesmi
l
edst
ari
ngathi
mthenl
aughed.“
Bye!
”
“Seeyouat6.Helookedaroundtheshopt
hen
grabbedabeaut
if
ulblackdressandgavei
ttoher
.”
“I
fitdoesn’
tfi
tthecust
omeri
sal
l
owedt
oget
anothersi
zeri
ght?”
“
Yes.I
t’
sP6500.
”
“
Letmepayf
ori
t.
”
Heswipedhi
scardagai
nthenNanaopackedt
he
dr
ess.Ronal
dputbackhi
swall
eti
nhispocket
.
“
Weari
ttoni
ght
.Seey
ouat6.
”
Hewinkedatherthenwalkedout
.Nanaolookedat
hi
sbusinesscardthent
hedressandfoundhersel
f
bl
ushi
ngal one.

*
**

RonagotKenny’
sphoneandhandbagthenwalked
tohi
soffi
cewherehesatdownunlocki
ngherphone.
Heopenedamessagef r
om Lesegowhohadleft
mult
ipl
emissedcal
lsandreadit
.
“
Shi
tno!
”

*
**

Earyint
heev eni
ng,Maatl
aarri
vedatalodgethen
checkedinatKil
imanj
aro.Hetookouthisphone
i
mmedi at
elyconnecti
ngtothefreeWiFiand
checkedEsi’
swhatsapp.Hismessageshadn’tbeen
repl
iedbutherprof
il
epict
urehadchanged.I
twas
herstandi
ngfeetfr
om agiraf
fethatwasonthe
background.Hesatdownnowwonder ingwhich
l
odgeshecoul dpossi
blybeat.

*
***

Esi
layont
hebedasSeanmassagedherf
eet
.
“
Iam sot
ir
ed.
”
“
Tomorrowwear
egoi
ngt
oseet
hewat
erf
all
sin
Moshi
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Ienj
oyedt
oday
.Especi
all
ythesunset
bus.
”
Hegotont
opofherandki
ssedher
.“Met
oo.
”
“
Thanky
ouf
orbr
ingi
ngmeher
e.”
“
Iam gl
adIbroughty
ou.Andi
tseemswear
egoing
t
obeherefortwomoredaysorsot
henwef
inal
l
ygo
t
oZanzi
bar.
”
“
Idon’
tmi
nd.Ihav
eswi
tchedof
fmyphonet
oav
oid
unnecessarydi
str
act
ions.Iam goi
ngt
ousey
our
sto
takepi
ctures.
”
Seanki
ssedherhar
dertaki
ngthetowelof
fherbody.
Esit
ouchedhi
sdickthenSeanpausedandlookedat
her.
“
Ihopey
oudon’
tmakemer
egr
ett
his.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Stopt
alki
ngandf
uckme.
”
Hesmili
ngkissi
ngheragai
nthent
ookouthi
sdi
ck
andsankinherwar
mt h.

DAYSLATER…
.
.
Li
keandcommentassoonasy
our
ead,
wehav
e
bonuseswai
ti
ngf
orus
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#69

Day
slat
er.
..

Sel
etso’shusbandparkedhi
scarinfr
ontof
Mothusi’
sgatethenSelet
sosteppedoutandwal
ked
i
nsidetheyard.Sheknockedonthedoor,mi
nut
es
l
aterNanaoopened.
“
Hey
..
”
“
Hi,
isher
eady
?”
“Yes,hei
sput
ti
ngonhi
sshoes.Letmegi
vey
ouhi
s
bag.”
Nanaowalkedbackinsi
det
hehouseandcameback
wit
hLefa’
sbag.“Therewego.
”
“
Thanks.Wher
eisMot
husi
?”
“
Att
endi
ngaf
ri
end’
sgr
andmot
her
sfuner
al?
”
“
Thabang?
”
“
No,
Kennyorsomet
hing.
”
Sel
etsof
rowned.“
Kenny
’sgr
andmot
her
?”
“
Yes.Youknowher
?”
“
Yes,that’
shi
sexgirl
fr
iend,
theonehelovedso
muchIalwaysfel
tli
keshewaspartofthe
r
elat
ionshi
pevenwhenshewasnotar ound.
”
“
War
eKennykeexnemmawena?
”
“
Yes!That
’shi
sex,koorel
astt
imeIheardshewas
i
npri
sonforat
temptedmurder
.Itmeanssheisout
.
Wai
t,l
etmeshowy ou.”
LefawalkedoutasSelet
sotookoutherpohoneand
searchedKennyonfacebook.
“
Himama.
.”
“
Heymyboy
,youcangott
hecar
.Takey
ourbag.
”
Lefat
ookhi
sbagthenalkedt
othecar
.Sel
etso
showedNanaot
hepict
ure.
“
That
’sKenei
l
we.
”
“
Heel
a,Ir
emenerthi
sgir
l,shei
stheonewho
Mot
husiwashuggi
ngtheothert
ime.Ican’
tbel
i
eve
hel
i
edt
omeandsai
dshewasaf
ri
end.
”
Sel
etsotookherphonet
henl
aughedst
ari
ngather
bar
ef i
nger.
“
Wher
eisy
ourr
ing?
”
“It
ookitoff
,itwasalreadybori
ngme.Atf ir
stitwas
exci
ti
ngseeingitonmyf i
ngerbutfi
vemont hslat
er
andsti
llnot
hing.Kanay aanongIam chasi
ng
possi
blepotenti
alsbecauseofthatri
ng.”
“
Mot
husi
isnotser
ious.
”
“
Hei
snotandnnaIam mov
ingon.
”
Sel
etsolookedi
nherey
es.“
Ebeoj
olaNanao.Who
i
she? ”
Nanaosmi
l
ed.“
Whatar
eyout
alki
ngabout
?”
“Waj
ola.(Youaredati
ng.
)Youarecheat
ing,
Ican
seei
tinyoureyes.Bogir
l!Any
wholetmego.”
“
Okby
e.”
Nanaowal kedbackinsi
det hehousethenchanged
herclot
hesputti
ngonwhatRonal dhadboughther
thetoget
herwiththeheels.Shetookherphoneand
cal
l
edMot
husi
.
“
Heybabe.
.”
“
Hey
.”
“Iam l
eavingforGabor
onenow,
IhopeIgett
he
order
sright.
”
“
Iwi
shIcandr
ivey
out
her
e.”
“Noi
t’
sok.Iam sur
eKennycoul
duseal
lthesuppor
t
andl
ovefr
om herfr
iends.
”
“Yeahei
sh…wearegoingt
othegr
avey
ardnow.She
hasbeencry
ingsi
nce.
”
“
Shewi
l
lbef
ine.Ok,
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Herphonerangasshehungupthenshegrabbed
herhandbagandwalkedoutl
ocki
ngbehi
ndher.She
walkedtothecarandgoti
n.Hesmil
edather.
“
Hey
…”
“
Hi.
”
“
Ready
?”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Yes.
”
Het ookof fandstoppedataf i
l
lingstat i
onwher ehe
fi
ll
edupt hetankbeforedr iv
ingof fheadedt o
Gabor one.Hekeptst eal
inggl ancesathermaki ng
herblush, Godknewshehadnev erhadamando
everythi
ngRonnywasdoi ngf orher .I
naf ewday she
hadspendmor ethan10konher .Hei ncreasedt he
volumeont heradiothent heylistenedt oChar magi r
l
andHanCwhi lehesteppeddownont heaccelerator
.
*
**

Atthef uner
al,Esisadl
ylookedatKennywhowas
standingwithhergrandmot her ’
ssi
sterin-
lawcr yi
ng.
Hercr i
esbrokeherhear tshef oundherselfcr
ying
stari
ngather .Thecof f
ingotl oweredasshecr ied
evenlouder.Esisighedunabl etoimaginejusthow
deept hepainwas.Shel ookedatKenny ’
smot heron
theothersidewhowascr yi
ngbutnobodyseemedt o
bet r
yingtocalm herdown, everyone’
sfocuswas
Kenny .I
twasi fshedidn’tevenexist.
Peowhowasst
andi
ngbesi
dehersni
ff
edcr
yingt
oo.
“
Thi
sispai
nful
.
”
“
Iti
s,Kennywasr
aisedbyt
hiswoman.
”
Peotear
ful
lyl
ookedatKennyt
hensi
ghed.“
Thepai
n
nev
erreal
lygoesaway.
”
Esi
lookedatPeot
henr
ubbedhershoul
der
.
“
Irememberwhenmymot herpassedon,Iwasleft
wi
thnoone.Icanunder
standhowshei sfeel
ing.At
l
eastshehasastr
ongsuppor tsy
stem.”
Theyl
ookedRonawhowasst
andi
ngwi
thLebi
tso
andhi
sbrother
s.
“
Yah…”

*
**

Attheothersi
deTshenol ost oodwi thherhusband
cry
ing.Kgosiputhisar
msar oundher .Shecriedso
muchunabl etoevensingwi thev eryoneelseaspain
chockedher.Thelossalsof eltpersonal wit
hher,
shehadknownKenny ’
sgr andmot hersi ncethey
star
tedthei
rfri
endshi
p.I
tal
sof
eltl
i
keshehadl
ost
hergrandmother.
Kgosir
ubbedbackthenhisphonevi
bratedf
rom his
pocket
.Het ooki
tandl
ookedatthescreenbefor
e
sl
idi
ngitbackinhi
spocketi
gnori
ngthecall
er.

*
**

Backatthehouse, relat
iveswhohadr emained
behindcookedf oreveryonewhohadwentt othe
graveyar
dwhi l
echat ti
ng.Ot herwomenwhost ayed
aroundKenny ’
sgrandmot heralsohel
pedcooking
whilechatt
ingandsi ppingonsomedr i
nks.
“
Kanat
hiswomanusedt
owonderar
oundnaked.
”
“Gaweoneal owanowondert
hingsal
way
swor
ked
outforherdaught
er.
”
“NnaIst i
ll
believeshewasawi tch.Therei
snosuch
sicknesswher ebysomeonewi l
lwonderaround
naked.Ihear dthatKennyisdat
ingar i
chmanin
Gabor one,hergrandmothermusthavemadet hat
happen.
”
“Mydaughtersay
sshehasseenKennyonfacebook,
shei
slivi
ngthehighl
i
fethoughshej
ustwal
kedout
ofpr
ison.
”
“
Pri
son?
”
“
Yes,
shemur
der
edsomeone.
”
“
Youl
i
e.”
“
Iam t
ell
i
ngy
ou.
”
Theycont
inuedchat
ti
ngwhi
l
ecooki
ng.

*
**

Awhi l
elat
erpeoplebeguncomingbackf
rom t
he
grav
eyard,Tshenol
owalkedovert
oKennyandhel
d
herhand.
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
Kennyl
ookedatherandnoddedcr
ying.
Acoupl
eofmor
epeopl
ewal
kedov
ergi
vi
ngher
encour
agingwordsastheygoti
ntheircar
sgoing
backtothehouse.Mot
husiwentovertoKennyas
shegotinhercar.
“
Hey
…”
Shef
orcedasmi
l
e.“
Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ng.
”
“
It
’sok.Iknowwhatweagreedonbuty
ouneedal
l
t
hesupportyoucanget
.”
Shenoddedwi
pingawayat
ear
.
“
Thanks.
”
Hewatchedasshegoti
nthecarthenwal
kedt
ohi
s
car
.OneofKenny’
scousi
nwalkedover
.
“
Hit
her
rawenakekopal
i
ft.
”
“
Uhy
eahsur
e.”
Theygotinthecart
henhef
oll
owedt
heot
hercar
s
backtothehouse.
“
Mynamei
sMer
cy.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hesi
l
ent
lydr
ovebehi
ndKenny
’scar
.
*
**

Backatt
hehouse,
rel
ati
vessati
nsi
dethehouse
di
scussi
ngacoupl
eofthi
ngsthenKef
ifi
nal
lyst
ood
up.
“Si
nceIam t
heonl
ychi
l
dmymot
herhad,
Iam t
aki
ng
ever
ythi
ng.
”
Heruncl
elookedather.“
Taki
ngev
erythi
ngwher
e?
Shealwaystal
kedaboutl
eavi
ngever
ythi
ngi
n
Kenny’
scare.”
“Kennywil
ltaket
hem from meaf t
erIdi
e,Iam t
he
onlychi
l
dmymot herhad.Iam notevengoingt
o
fi
ghtanyoneaboutit
.Everyt
hingismineandIam
taki
ngit
.”
“Wellunf
ortunatel
yf ory
ou,ev
eryt
hingi sinKenny ’
s
name.Yourmot herknewy ouwoulddot hissoshe
putevery
thinginKenny ’
sname.Every t
hing!”He
l
ookedatt herel
atives.“
Andthat
’sall.Gonet herei
s
nothi
ngmor etodiscussbecauseev erythi
ngi s
cl
ear.
”
Al
ltherel
ati
vesnoddedthenbegunwal
ki
ngout.
Kennygotupwitharel
ati
vethenwal
kedout
side.
“
Hav
eyoueat
ensomet
hing?
”
“
Iam nothungr
y.”
“
Youneedt
oeat
.”
Kefi
lwewal
kedovert
owher
eKennywas.The
rel
ati
vel
ookedather
.
“Kefi
lwecanyoul
etthi
schi
l
dmour
nher
grandmotheri
npeace?
”
“
Iwantt
otal
ktomydaught
er.
”
“
Yourdaughtert
odaybecausey
ouwanther
i
nher
it
ance.”
“
Letmet
alkt
omydaught
er,
want
ena.
”
Kef
ihel
dKenny
’shandst
henhuggedher
.
“Ideservemyinheri
tanceKeneilwe.Every
thingis
whatmyf at
herl
eftforme.It’sr
ight
full
ymi ne.My
mot herhaspassedon, Iam goi
ngthroughal otin
myl if
e,Iam sostr
essed.Cany oupleasereturn
everythi
ngtomebecausei t’
snoty ours.
”
“Mmamal eftev
ery
thi
ngf
orme.Youdon’
trecogni
ze
measy ourdaught
ersoy
oushoul
dn’
tbeasking
any
thi
ngf r
om me.”
Shewalkedaway .Kefil
weangr i
lylookedathert hen
walkedbackinsi
det hehousewher eshefil
leda
gl
asswi t
hjui
ce,shel ookedaroundbef oreputt
ing
handful
ofantif
reezepi l
l
sinsi
de.Shemi xeditt
hen
walkedoutbumpi ngintoheruncle’swife.
“
Ihopeyouarenotgoingtotr
ytof
ightKennyon
whatwasl
eftforherKefi
.”
Kefinodded.“
Iam notgoi
ngtofi
ghtherbut
hopeful
lyshedoestheri
ghtf
ult
hing.
”
Shewal
kedoutt
henhandedt
hej
uicet
osomeone.
“Youcangoandgivei
ttoher
,makesur
eshedr
inks
sothatIcanpayy
ou.”
Thepersonnoddedt
henwal
kedov
ert
oKenny
hol
dingthej
uice.

*
**
Meanwhi
l
eMaat
lawal
kedov
ert
oEsi
.
“
Hi…”
Shelookedathi
m andswall
owed,shehadhear
dhe
hadfoll
owedhertoTanzani
aandcamebackaday
bef
oreher.Shetookadeepbreat
htry
ingtomaster
upthecourage.
“
Hi.
”
“Ihavetogo,dutycall
s.Iwantedt
ogiveyou
somet hi
ngforthekidsbecauseIwil
lbegonef
ora
while.
”
Esil
ookedathi
m,hewasn’tev
enshoutingorrai
sing
hi
svoiceonher
.Hedi
dn’tevenlookangryather
.
“
Ohok.
”
“
It
’si
nthecar
.Comeandt ake,
Iwon’
tbegoi
ngback
t
oGaboronef
rom her
e.”
“
Ok.
”
Shewal
kedtothecarwit
hhimthengoti
n.Maat
la
l
ookedatherf
inger
,herr
ingwasnott
her
e.
“
Soy
ousl
eptwi
thhi
m?”
“
Cany
ougi
vemet
het
hings,
Kennyneedsme.
”
“
Wher
eisy
ourr
ing?
”
“
Itooki
tof
f.Idon’
twanty
ouany
mor
e.”
“
Soy
ouser
iousl
ywentt
owhor
einTanzani
a?”
“I
jo!Youwer ewhori
ngforthepastfiveyear
s.Goto
yourgirl
fri
end.Nnawantena,Idon’twantyou
anymor e.Idon’
twantt
hisfakeloveanymore.Iwant
adivorce.”
“Youareaslut.Leenehemusthav ebeenbored
withyoubecausewabor ainbed.Youar enoteven
thatni
ce.Andy ouarenoteventhatbeauti
fulMoesi
.
Therearealotofwomenbet terthanyou.Youare
fat.
”
Moesi l
aughed.“
Iam beauti
fulandIknowit.Iam
sexynotfatandIknowIam notboringinbed
becausehekeptmoani ngmynamewi t
heacht hr
ust
.
Heknowshi sshitt
oo,hefuckswaybet t
ert
hany ou
canandguesswhat ?Hisdicki
sbiggerandbet t
er
thanyours.He-
”
Maat
laangr
il
ysmackedheracr
ossherf
ace.
“Otsi
l
egony el
a,youthi
nky
oucanj
ustcheatonme
andgetawaywithit
?Youaremywi
feandket si
l
e
gogobankanya.
”
Esit
riedtoopent hedoortoleav
ebutMaatlagave
heranotherhotslapthatbl
ooddroppedfr
om her
nosetoherthigh.Helockedthedoorsanddrove
fr
om thefuneralwhil
eshecriedbesi
deshim.

*
**
Kennygotgreet
edbymorerel
ati
vesasthey
sympathi
zedwithhert
henagi
rlwalkedover
.
“
Hicouzy
,Iam r
eal
l
ysor
ryaboutMme.
”
Kennynodded.“
Thanky
ou.
”
“Ir
ememberherandIsti
l
lcan’
tbel
i
eveshei
sgone.
Taket
his,
somejuice.
”
Kennygr
atef
ull
ytooki
t.“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
It
’sokcouzy
,youneedal
lthel
ovey
oucanget
.”
Thecousi
nwal
kedawayasKennybr
oughtt
hej
uice
toherl
ips
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#70

Thecousinwal
kedawayasKennybr
oughtt
hej
uice
toherl
ipstot
akeasip.
“
Oir
ang?(
Whatar
eyoudoi
ng?
)Wher
edi
dyouget
t
hat
?”
MmagweTumosnat
chedt
hegl
ass.
“Didn’tyourgrandmot hertellyouaboutt aki
ngthi
ngs
from st r
angers?It’
saf uneral,
therearelotofpeople
her e,somey oudon’tev enknowt hem andnot
ev eryoneli
kesy ou.Therear ewitchesandwi zar
ds
her e.IaskedAronat ogoandgety oufood.Idon’
t
wanty outoeatany thi
ngt hathasbeencookedher e
today .”
“
Eemma.
”
“
Howf
arar
eyou?
”
Kennyl
ookeddown.“
Thr
eeweeks.
”
“
Ok.Rr
agweTumohaspost
ponedt
hema-
…uhwe
havepost
ponedacoupl
eofthi
ngsthatwewant
ed
todosothatwecanmournpeacef
ull
y.
””
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evet
hatshei
sgone.
.”
“
Iknow,
met
oo.Butshei
srest
ingpeacef
ull
ynow.
”
“
Kef
il
wehat
esme.Shesai
dIam ar
apepr
oduct
.”
“Youar enotar apepr oduct .Ther easonwhynoone
beli
evedhercl aimsisbecauseshehadbeenf li
rt
ing
withthatmar ri
edman.Hi swi feoncecamet oyour
grandmot herandt ol
dhert ot alktoKefibecauseshe
waspl ayi
ngf artoocloset oherhusband.Shewasa
chil
dthenandshewasbeaut i
ful,noonecouldtell
Kefil
weany thing.Shehadagr eatfut
ureinfrontof
herandshel ov edtheat tentionshegot .Whenshe
saidshegotr apedbyt hatman, i
twashardt o
beli
eveherbecausej ustweeksbef oreshehadbeen
repri
mandedagai nstthatman.Nooneknowswhat
happenedt hatday ,j
usther .”
“
Shebl
amesmef
orr
unni
ngherl
i
fe.
”
“Youdi
dn’
tdoany
thi
ngtoher.I
fther
eisany
onet
o
blamei
tshoul
dbeyourf
ather
.”
“
Ist
il
ldon’
twantanyt
hingt
odowit
hhi
m.Ihat
ehi
m
mor
ethanIhatedhi
m atfi
rst
.”
Ronawal
kedoverhol
dingapl
ast
icoff
ood.“
I
br
oughtf
ood.
”
“
Goandeatatt
hecar
.”
Ronatookherhandandl
edhert
ot hecarwhi
l
e
mmagweTumowal kedt
othegi
rlwhohadgiven
Kennythej
uice.
“
Whoar
eyou?
”
Thegi
rlt
urnedt
oher
.“Ma?
”
“
Whoar
eyou?
”
“
I…I
…”
“Iknowwhaty ouandKefi
lwehavedone.Iam t
aki
ng
thi
sj uicet
othepoli
ceandyoubothar
egoingtoget
arrestedandroti
njai
l.
”
“
Idi
dn’
tdoany t
hing.Kef
il
wesaidIshoul
djustgi
vei
t
t
oKenny.Idon’
tknowwhat ’
sinsi
de.
”
“
Getoutoft
hisy
ardbef
oreImakey
oudr
inki
t!
”
Thegi
rlqui
ckl
ywal
kedawayasmmagweRumo
wal
kedt
oKef
il
we.Sheputt
hej
uicebef
oreher
.
“
Ibr
oughty
ouj
uice.
”
Kef
il
wel
ookedatherandswal
l
owed.“
Iam f
ine.
”
“Ngng,
dri
nkyourj
uice.Kennysay
sshei
sfi
ne.You
canhav
eit
.”
“
Idi
dn’
tgi
vei
ttoher
.”
“Isawyougiv
eittothatgir
ltogi
vet
oKenny
.NowI
am giv
ingi
tback.Takeitanddri
nki
t.
”
“
Iam f
ine.
”
“Youareevil
,soev il
thatGodshal lneverblessyou
ever.OmoloiKefilwe.Themor ey ouwillhatethat
chil
dthemor ethingswillneverworkoutf oryou.
Trustme.Godwi llneverhavemer cyony oubecause
yourhearti
sfullofsomuchhat e.Ican’tbeli
eveyou
wouldtrytokil
lyourownchi l
d, y
ourownf l
eshand
blood…youarebr avelyevi
l.
”
Shet
hrewt
hej
uicewal
ki
ngi
nsi
det
hehouse.

*
**
I
nsidet
hecar
,Kennyfor
cedthefooddownher
t
hroatt
henRonatookouthi
sphoneandcal
ledhi
s
mother
.
“
Someonewant
stot
alkt
oyou.
”
Kennyl
ookedathi
mthenhehandedhert
hephone.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hel
l
o?”
Kennysmi
l
edt
ear
ful
l
y.“
Hibaby
..
”
“
Imi
ssy
ou.
”
At
earr
oll
eddownKenny
’scheek.“
Imi
ssy
out
oo.
”
“
Grannysai
dy ourgrandmot
herwentt
oheav
en.She
i
swiththeangels.
”
Kennynoddedput
ti
ngherhandov
erhermout
h.
“Yes.
”
“Sheiswat
chi
ngov
erus.ButIam goi
ngt
omi
ss
her.
”
“
Met
oo.
”
“
Howi
sthebaby
?”
Shechuckl
edl
ooki
ngatAr
ona.“
Thebabyi
sfi
ne.
”
“
Whenar
ewegoi
nghome?
”
“Daddywill
comet
ogety
ouwhent
heschool
sar
e
opening.
”
“
Ok,
buti
t’
sbor
ingher
e.”
“
Makef
ri
endst
hen.
”
“
Ok,
bye!
”
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Shehungupandgav eRonabackt hephone.“
Ican’
t
bel
iev
eyoutoldhim Iam expect
ingababy.Heis
goi
ngtostar
twithhisnonsense.”
Ronasmi
led.“Letmyboygetexci
ted.Youar
e
car
ryi
ngapreciouscar
gother
e.”
“
Wher
eisEsi
?”
“
Maat
lasay
stheyar
egoi
ngt
otal
k.”
“
Tal
k?Whati
fhehur
tsher
?”
“
No,hecamebackfrom Tanzani
ahumbl
e.Her
eal
l
y
want
stofi
xthi
ngs.
”
“
Sheisnotgoi
ngt
otakehi
m back.Notaf
terhav
ing
t
hreeki
ds.
”
“
Younev
erknow.
”
“
Sheisnotgoi
ngtotakehim back,
sheismovingon.
Nowomancanstayforthatnonsense.I
fyoutr
yitI
wi
ll
leav
ey ouf
astert
hanyoucanwr it
eyourname.
Mogongwekelenyat
sohela.”
Ronasmiledather.“
Kantekengokar
ewaomana
yanong?Iwouldneverdothatt
oyou.
”
“
Gakeomane,
Iam j
ustsay
ing.
”
“
Eatmot
howame.
”
Asti
lewal
kedov
ert
hensmi
l
edatKenny
.“Hey
..Iam
real
l
ysorr
y.”
“
Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ng.
”
“
Wear
efami
l
y.Hasany
oneseenMaat
la?
”
“Hesayshei
str
yingt
oconv
inceEsi
tot
akehi
m
back.
”
“
Ok,t
herei
sadudeIjustspokewit
h,waMaunsoke
j
umpelat
eng.Iwi
l
lgetafli
ghtbacktoMaun.
”
“
Ok.Iwi
l
ltel
lMaat
la.
”
“
Sur
e,by
eMakenzo.
”
Kennyslowl
ysmil
edt
henAr
onawal
kedaway
l
eavinghert
ryi
ngt
oeat.

*
**

Maatl
ast
oppedt
hecarinthemi
ddl
enowher
ethen
dr
aggedEsi
outwi
thherhair
.
“
Want
lwael
aEsi
!”
“
Leav
emeal
one!
”
“Saywhatyouwer
esay
ingt
omet
hatdayont
he
phone.Sayi
t!
”
“
Leav
e-“
Heslappedhert
hatshel
ostbal
ancef
all
i
ng.He
pul
l
edherup.
“
War
eng?Saywhaty
ouwer
esay
ing.
”
“
Youar
ehur
ti
ngme.
”
“Ontl
waetswakeng?Yougoandgi v
emypussyt o
somemanoutt her
et heny ouarerudeabouti
t,Iam
goi
ngtoburryyouali
vet odayandIwi l
lmakesure
i
t’
ssogoodnoonewi llsuspectanythi
ng.O
ntl
waetswakeng?”
Tear
sfi
l
ledherey
esashepul
l
edherwi
thherhai
r.
“
Youar
ehur
ti
ngme.
”
“
Isai
dsaywhaty
ousai
dtomet
hatday
.”
“
Iam so-
“
Hesmackedherwi ththebackofherhandt hatshe
fel
lagaincryi
ng.Shehadnev erseenhi mlikethis,
mat t
eroffact
, hehadnev err
aisedhishandonher
before.Notevenraisehi
sv oi
ceathernomat t
erhow
angryhewasandr i
ghtnowshewasl ooki
ngat
someoneshecoul dn’tevenrecognize.Theangeris
hiseyesmadeheri ntest
inestwistpainful
l
yand
somet hi
ngtoldherhewasgoi ngt okill
her.
“
Getup!
”
“
Maat
la-
“
“
Getup!
”
Shesl
owl
ygotup.“
Whatdi
dyoudoi
nTanzani
a?”
Esi
gotupcry
ing.“
Pleasel
etgo.Youdon’
thaveto
dothi
s.Wehaveki
dsMaatla.Iam t
hei
rmother.
”
“
Howmanyt
imesdi
dyouhav
esexwi
thhi
m?”
“
Maat
la-
“
Herai
sedhi
shandandsl
appedheragai
n.“
Iam
goi
ngtososl
apti
ll
youst
arttal
ki
ng.
”
“
Maat
la-
“
Herai
sedhi
shandt
hensheputherhandsonher
f
ace.
“
Twi
ce.
”
“
War
etwi
ce?
”
“
Twi
ce-
“
Hepull
edherhandfr
om herf
aceandsl
appedher
.
Esi
brokedowncryi
ng.
“
War
etwi
ce?
”
“
Thr
ice!Thr
ice!Youar
ehur
ti
ngme.
”
“
Iam goi
ngt
oki
l
lyoui
fyoudon’
ttel
lmet
het
rut
h.”
“
Itwas8t
imes.
”
Hewal kedt othecart ogetsomethi
ng,Esil
ooked
aroundthent ookof frunni
ngbacktotheroad.
Maat l
aranaf terherthengrabbedherarms.Esifell
thenheputhi sshoeonherneck.Shegaspedashe
steppedonherneckev enharder
.Shetr
iedpushing
offhisherasherey esroll
edbackseei
ngherlif
e
fl
ashbef oreherey es.Hegothisshoeoffandpulled
herupwi thherhai rasshecoughed.
“
Cal
lhi
m andt
ell
himy
ouar
enol
ongerseei
nghi
m.”
Herhandsshookasshet
appedSean’
snumber
.
“
Heybabe…”
“Thisr
elat
ionshi
pisnotgoi
ngtoworkandIam
goingtofi
xthingswi
thmyhusband.Whatev
er
happenedbetweenusisover.
”
“
Babe-
“
“
Nev
ercal
lmeagai
n.By
e!”
Shehungupandl
ookedathi
m cr
ying.
“
Iam sor
ry,
it’
snev
ergoi
ngt ohappenagain.Ifor
giv
e
y
ou.Iwanttofi
xourmar
riage.Il
oveyou.Please
l
et’
sgohome.”
Maat
lal
ookedather
.
“Iam sorry
, pl
easelet’
sgohome.Ilov eyousomuch.
Iwantt ofi
xt hi
ngs.Ij
ustwantedtohur tyou.Iam
sorry.Wecomef rom f
ar…babeyouknowme…i t’
s
Esi.Ilov
ey ou.let
’sgohome.Wewi l
l seesomeone.
Thisisnoty ou.Wecanf i
xthi
ngs.Please…”
Shewalkedov
ert
ohi
m andhuggedhi
mti
ght
ly.“
I
l
oveyou.”

*
**

Laterthatdayi nGabor one,Nanaosatinsi

de
Ronald’shousesmi li
ngaf tertheyate.Hewalked
fr
om thekit chenholdingtwogl assesofwineand
gavehergl ass.Shet ookasi p.
“
Yourhousei
sbeaut
if
ul.
”
“Thanks,Iam act
ual
l
ythi
nki
ngofsel
l
ingi
tbecauseI
don’tst
ayheremostofthet
ime.
”
ShetookanothersipthenRonnykissedherput
ti
ng
herglassdown.Het ookof
fherdressgetti
ng
betweenherlegsthen#removed.
.
Thedoorbur stopenthenawomanwal ked.Ronald
j
umpedof fhi
m cov er
inghisdi
ckwhil
eNanao
cover
edherher selfwithacushi
on.Thewomant ook
herphoneandt ookpi ct
uresasRonal
dlookedather ,
herheartpounding..
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#71

Nanao’
shear
tbeatsof
astasshelookedatt
he
womanasshetookmorepict
ures.
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”
Shel
ookedathi
m put
ti
ngawayherphone.
“Ronny
,ar
eyouaski
ngmewhatIam doi
ngi
nmy
ownhouse?”
Heswallowedt
henqui
ckl
yputonhi
spant
s.“
Ican
expl
ain.
”
Shel
ookedathi
m.“
Expl
ain.
”
Hest
ammeredunsureofwhatt
osay
.Nanaogotup
l
ooki
ngf
orherpant
ies.
“
Koor
eot i
samabel
etemontl
ungyameRonal
d?
(
Youbri
ngwhor
esinmyli
feRonal
d?)
”
“
It
’snot
hing.I
tdoesn’
tmeanany
thi
ng.
”
Nanaogotherdr
essandputi
tonasRonal
dtr
ied
expl
aini
ngt
ohi
swi
febutshewasn’
thear
ingnonof
i
t.
“Kooreyoujusthadto!Youcouldn’tl
iv
emor ethan
twoday sandalreadyyouhaveanewgi rl
fri
end.”She
tookoffherheelandthrewitatNanao.Nanao
screamedast heheelhitherf
orehead,hi
swi f
ecame
forher.Shegrabbedherwigthenitfel
loff
.Nanao
tri
edtogetawaybuthi sbigbodiedwifepunchedher
face.
“
Lebel
etemont
lungy
ame!(
Awhor
einmyhouse!
)”
Nanaotri
edpushingheroffbuttheheavywoman’
s
puncheskeptcomingli
kerainf
all
.Ronal
dpull
edher
awayasNanaohel dherfacecryi
ng.Thewoman
l
ookedathim.
“Ihavetri
edeveryt
hingi
nmypowerandIcan’t
anymor e.Iam goi
ngtohumil
i
atey
ouandy our
gir
lfr
iendthensue.Wantwael
ahel
ayaanong.I
nmy
house?Myhouse? ”
Nanaost
oodnearthekit
chenastheyargued
st
andi
ngbythedoor,sheonl
yknewthismani n
Gabor
one.Tear
sfi
ll
edhereyesasshetrembled
st
andi
ngr
ightt
her
e,herf
aceachi
ng.
“
BabeIam sor
ry.Idon’
tev
enl
oveher
.It
’sonl
ysex
.”
“Osantseobatlangbont
lungy
ame?(Whatareyou
sti
l
ldoingi
nmyhouse? )Mma,getout
,Iwi
l
lmeet
youincour
t,akerewenayousl
eepwit
hmarri
ed
men.”
“
Idi
dn’
tknow-
”
“
Getoutofmyhouse.
”
Nanaot
ear
ful
l
ylookedatRonal
d.“
Ronny
…”
“Leav
emyhouse.Iam mar
ri
edandIl
ovemywi
fe.
Tsamaya.
”
“
Ronnyy
ouknowIdon’
tknowany
onei
nGabor
one.
”
“
Pleasel
eav
emyhouse.
”
Hiswif
elookedather .“
Youbetterbepreparedto
paymemymoneybecauseIam goi ngtosuey ou
babygi
rl,
youaregoi ngtoforev
erregr
etitmmehel a
fort
oni
ght,Iam sendingtheseimagestoajournali
st
andshewilldothejobforme.Youar egoingtobe
sohumili
ated.
”
Tear
sroll
eddownNanao’
scheeks.“
Idi
dn’
tknowI
swear.
”
“Mmaetsho,
leav
emyhouse.Getout
!Andyouwere
notev
enusingacondom.Doyouknowhisst
atus?
”
Thewi f
elookedatRonny .“
Iguesshedi
dn’tt
ell
you,
wear eonmedicati
on.Wear ebothposi
ti
ve.I
fyou
comebackpr egnantIam goingtot
eachyouyet
anotherl
esson.Getout.Iwil
lmeetyoui
ncourtke
batl
ahundredthousandwame. ”
Nanaosl
owlywalkedouthol
dingherbag.She
l
ookedatherphoneasMothusicall
edthenshetook
adeepbreat
handansweredstari
ngatthedarkness.
“
Hel
l
o…”
“
Heybabe,
didy
ouset
tl
e?”
Shelookedar
oundtry
ingt
ohol
dinhert
ear
sbutshe
brokedowncryi
ng.
“
What
’swr
ong?
”
“
I…”
“
What
’swr
ong?
”
“
Iwenttosl
eepatafri
end’
shouse,
Iknowher
t
hroughmyworkmatebutnowshehasjustki
cked
meoutandIdon’
tknowwheretogo.”
“
Shi
t!I
sn’
tther
enot
axi
snear
by?
”
“
Not
hingandi
t’
sdar
k.Iam scar
ed.
”
“
ButbabeIt
houghty
ouwer
egoi
ngt
oal
odge…”
“
Oht
her
eisat
axi
.”Shest
oppedi
tthengoti
n.
“
Letmet
alkt
othedr
iver
.”
Shehandedthedr
ivert
hephonethent
heyspoke
bri
efl
ybefor
ethedr
iverdr
oveoff
.
“
Heisgoi
ngtot
akey
outoalodge.Youwi
l
lsl
eep
t
her
etoni
ght
.Ar
eyouokt
hough?”
“
Iam f
ine.
”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
“Ihav
espokent
omyfat
her
.It
hinkInowhav
e
enoughmoneyt
ogi
veyout
hebestweddi
ng.
”
Nanaocl
osedherey
es.“
Ithoughty
ouhadchanged
y
ourmi
nd.
”
Mothusil
aughed.“Il
oveyou.Iwassav i
ngfort he
magadinegoti
ati
onsandtheweddi ngtoo.Ididn’
t
wanttotakealoan,Idi
dthatwit
hmyex.Idon’ t
wanttorepeatt
hesamemi st
aketwice.Ihavesav ed
alotf
orust ogetmarri
ed.
”
Nanaopr
essedherl
ipst
ryi
ngnott
ost ar
tsobbi
ng
butt
ear
swererol
li
ngdownhercheeks.
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
Mothusismil
ed.“
Ilov
eyout
oo.Ei
sh.If
eel
sol
onel
y
r
ightnow.”
“Metoo.Iwi
shIcant
aket
heev
eni
ngbusandcome
backhome.”
“
Tomor
row.Youneedt
ogett
heor
der
sfi
rst
.”
“Whenwer
eyougoi
ngt
otel
lmet
hatKennyi
syour
ex?
”
Mothusisi
ghed.“
ReasonwhyIdidn’tt
ellyouis
becauseyouwouldn’
tli
keandIdi
dn’twanty ou
thi
nki
ngmay beIam st
il
lhunguponher .Ijust
wantedtogoandpaymyl astr
egardstoher
grandmother.That
’sal
l
.Iev enl
eftassoonasshe
wasburied.Iwouldnevercheatonyou.Iknowwhat
Iwantandit’syou.
”
Thet
axi
dri
verst
oppedi
nfr
ontofal
odge.
“
Howmuchi
sit
?”
“Nahbabe,Ial
readysor
tedi
tout.Goandusethe
cashyouhaveony ouandcheckin.Iwi
l
lcal
li
naf ew
minut
es.”
“
Ok,
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Shesteppedoutwit
hherhandbagt
henwal
ked
i
nsidethelodge’
sgat
e.

*
**

Meanwhi leMothusigothisbeerfr
om thekit
chen
thensatdowninf rontoftheTV.Hisphonev i
brated
asaf acebooknotif
icat
ionreport
ed.Heopenedt he
noti
fi
cationandwentt othepostthatThabanghad
ment i
onedhim.Helookedatthepi
ctur
esofthe
womanwhohadbeencaughtwi thsomeone’s
husband.Hetappedtheimagesandfrowned,hi
s
heartbeat
ingfastandhar
dagainsthi
schest.
Hi
sphonei
mmedi
atel
yst
art
edr
ingi
ng.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Didy
ouseet
hepostIt
aggedy
ouon.
”
“
Ist
hat
…”
“
It
’sher
.Wher
eisshe?
”
“Shesai
dshewentt
oGabor
onet
ogett
he
bouti
que’
sor
der
s.”
“
Eish…andit
’sher
.Hef
acei
scl
ear
.Appar
ent
lyt
he
wi
feissui
ng.”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evet
his.
”
“Metoo,butmaybei
t’
snother
.Checkwi
thher
,how
didt
hefuneral
go?”
“
Fine.
”
Hehungupt
henMot
husical
l
edNanao.
“
Heybabe,j
ustcheckedi
nandIam al
readyi
nmy
r
oom.Thankyou.”
“
Wher
eexact
lyar
eyou?
”
“
What
?”
“
Yourpi
ctur
esar
eal
lov
erFacebook.
”
Shewassilent
.Mothusi
sighedt
earf
ull
yashi
shear
t
broke.Hehadexpect
edhertodenyi
tbutt
her
eshe
was.
“
Fuckbabe!
”
“
Iam sorr
y.Il
ovey
ou.Idon’
tknowwhathappened.
I
twasjustamomentofweakness.
”
Atearr oll
eddownhi scheek,asmuchashet r
iedto
convincehimselfthatmendon’ tcrythemorehi s
heartbroke.Thepainhewasf eel
ingwassomuch
hehungput ti
nghishandsonhi sface.Thepainfelt
sophy sicalhefoundhimselfphysical
lyhur
ting.His
phoner angbutshel ef
titt
or i
ngunanswer ed.

*
**
Latert hateveni
ngjustbef oremidnight,Maatl
a
openedt hedoorforEsi thenshewal kedinsi
det heir
house.Shewal kedtothebedr oom wher eshe
undr essedthentookashower .Awhi lelat
ershe
walkedoutt hent ookoutt hepyj
amasshehadl eft
andputt hem onwhi l
eMaat lawalkedi nsi
dethe
room.Hewasal itt
ledrunk.Helookedatherasshe
staredathi m,shecoul dn’tr
eadhim.Hewal kedov er.
“
Didy
ouenj
oyi
t?”
Shel
ookedathi
m.“
No.No.
”
Hesi
ghedt
hensatdown.“
Doy
oul
ovehi
m?”
Shequi
ckl
yshookherhead.“
Idon’
tev
enknowhi
m.”
“
Buty
ousl
eptwi
thhi
m.Youmustl
ovehi
m.”
“
Idon’
t.Idon’
t.Il
ovey
ou.
”
Herubbedhisfaceandlookedather .Painmakingit
hardforhi
mt oswall
ow.Hel ookedi nhereyes
seei
ngsomet hi
nghenev ersawbef ore,i
twasfear.
Esihadneverbeenscar
edofhi m, notforasfaras
hecouldremember.Hecoul dsti
ll
r ememberhow
t
heymetgoingtotheirf
ir
stki
ss,t
hei
rfi
rstni
ght
t
ogether
…Tearsfil
l
edhiseyesthenhel
ookeddown
wi
pingawaywardtearbutthemorehestoodther
e
t
hemor ehegottofacethepai
n.
Esi
lookedathi
m ashet
ri
edt
omanupst
ari
ngather
.
“
Ilov
eyou.Imessedup.Iwantt
ofi
xital
l
.”
Shenodded.“
Ifor
giv
eyou.Il
ovey
ou.Wewi
l
lfi
xit
al
l.
”
Hehuggedherthensheputherarmsaroundhi
m
whi
speri
ng.“
Iloveyou.Wewill
fixt
hings.
”
“
IfIl
osey
ouIdon’
tthi
nkIwi
l
lsur
viv
e.“
“
Iam notgoi
ngany
wher
e.Let
’ssl
eep.
”
Theyl ai
ddownt ogether,Maatl
aholdingherfr
om
behind.Esitookadeepbr eathtr
yingnottocrybuta
tearfell
tothepill
owf ol
lowedbytheot hert
hen
another.Itwasjusthowhehadbeat enheryetwhen
hehadt hreekidswiththeotherwomanshedi dn’
t
sayany thi
ng.May beifi
thadbeenonebutt hreewas
alot.Shehadbeenshar i
nghim andshedoubt edhe
wouldst opseeingtheotherwomant oo.
Shecl
osedherey
esf
orci
ngher
sel
ftosl
eep.

*
**

Earlymor ning,Esiopenedherey eswhi l

eMaat l
a
sl
ept .Shesl owlygotof fbed, het urnedi nhissl eep
asshesl owlyreachedf orherphonet henshepi cked
hershoesanddr ess.Shet hought full
yl ookedathi s
carkey s,hewoul dpr obablywakeupt hemoment
shewoul dstartthecarorev enopent hegat e.She
pickedt hekey sandt ipt
oedt ot hesi t
tingr oom
wher esheunl ockedt hemai ndoorandst eppedout
witht hekey sandlockedhi mi nsi
de.Shedr essedup
andunl ockedt hecarpr essingt hegat er emot e.

*
**

Maatlasnappedoutofhi ssl
eepatthesoundofhi
s
carunlocki
ng,helookedbesidehi
mt henqui
ckl
ygot
offbedgoingafterher.Hetr
iedopeni
ngthedoorbut
i
twasl ockedt
henhewenttothewindowt
othr
eat
en
herbutshewasalr
eadydr
ivi
ngoff.

*
**

Thefol
lowingmorni
ngNanaogotinthemorni
ngbus
toMaun,shesatdownandtookherphonecal
li
ng
Mothusi.
“
Whatdoy
ouwant
?”
“
Iam onmywayback.Iam sor
ry.
”
“Idon’
tthi
nkIst
il
l wantt
ogetmar r
iedanymore.I
f
youcancheatonmenowwhatwi llst
opy oufr
om
doingi
twhenwegetmar r
ied?It
oldyouifyoufi
nd
someonebetter
,tell
meinsteadofhurt
ingme.”
“
Ithoughty
ouhadchangedy
ourmi
ndbabe…”
“
Wel
lthi
sti
meIr
eal
l
ydi
d.By
e.”
Hedr
oppedt
hecal
lthenacal
lfr
om Sel
etsocamei
n.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Heel
a,hav
eyoubeenonf
acebook?
”
“
No.
”
“
Yourpictur
esareci
rcul
ati
ng.Ican’
tbel
i
eveyou
wouldcheatwi
thamar r
iedman.Sheisgoi
ngtosue
you.
”
“
Mothusi
saidhehadbeensav
ingmoneyt
ogi
veme
abi
gwedding.
”
“Ei
shsorr
ybuthecoul
dhavesai
dsonotj
ustkeep
qui
et.Whatwer
eyousupposedt
othi
nk?”
“
Iwasn’
tsupposedt
ocheat
.”
“Youcheat
edforal
ltheri
ghtf
ulr
easons.OfcauseI
don’
tcondonecheat
ingbut-
“
“Butnothing.Thisf r
iendshipisnotgivi
ngmeany
posit
iveresults,Ithi
nkweshoul djuststi
cktobeing
thebestpar entst oLefaandf or
getaboutusbei ng
fri
ends.Somet i
mesIam notsur eifyouareadv i
sing
outagoodpl aceory ouar esayingthosethingsso
youcanhur tMot husithr
oughme.Ther eisnothi
ng
l
ikecheatingf orther i
ghtreasonsbecauset hatman
hasbeent hebestsof ar.Iam notgoingt osaymuch
becauseifint
helongrunIremainbyMot husi
’
sside,
Iwantust ohaveapeacef
ul r
elat
ionshi
pbecauseof
Lefa.By
e.”
Shehungupthenputherhandsonherface
wonderi
nghowshewasgoi ngtodeal
withthemess.

*
**

LaterthatmorningKennysatbesi
deRonaashe
drovebackhome.Shet ookoutherphonetr
yingt
o
callEsibuthernumberasn’
tgoingthr
ough.
“
Ronadi
dyouspeakt
oMaat
la?
”
“
Nowhy
?”
“
Iam try
ingt
ocal
lEsi
.Hi
snumberi
sn’
tgoi
ng
t
hrough.”
Ronat
ookhi
sphoneandcal
l
edhi
sbr
other
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Wher
eisEsi
?”
“Sheranof f
.Ithoughtwewerefi
xingthingsbutshe
ranoff.IfIf
indoutthatshewenthim Iam goi
ngto
kil
lher.Esiwantlwaela.
”
“
Whatdi
dyoudot
oher
?”
“
Not
hing,
whatar
eyout
alki
ngabout
?”
“Whati
fshereport
syouf orwhat
every
oudi
dtoher
?
Orgoestoyoursuper
viser?”
“Iwi
ll
dealwit
hitwheni
tget
sther
emmeheal
ao
ntl
waelamasepa.
”
Ronal
ookedatKennyt
hensi
ghed.“
It
’sok,
shar
p.”
“
Whatdi
dhedot
oher
?”
“
Hesay
snot
hingbutsher
anaway
.”
“
Whati
fheki
l
ledherand-
“
Amessager
eport
edi
nherphone.Kennyopenedi
t
t
hensi
gheddel
eti
ngi
t.
“
May beshewentt
oherki
ds.Iwi
l
ltr
ycal
l
ingher
l
ater
.”
“
Ok.
”
FOURMONTHSLATER…
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#72

Kennypar kedhercaratQui nt
on’ spre-school parki
ng
andsighedwai t
ing.Shel ookedar oundexpect ingto
seehim wal kingov er.Shelookedatt het imeand
waitedforacoupl emor emi nutesget tingimpat i
ent
thenfinal
lysteppedoutoft hecarandwal ked
towardst heclasses.Shepausedl ooki ngathim as
hewal kedov er,hiswhi t
et-shi
rtnowbr ownand
untucked, hi
shai rfi
lledwit
hsoi l.Hisf acewasso
dir
tyitwasi fhehadbeenget ti
ngbapt izedinsoil.He
draggedhi sbagwal kingoverthensmi ledstar
ingat
hismot her’sangryf ace.
“
Qui
nton,
ist
hishowy
oul
ookedl
i
kei
nthemor
ning?
”
Heputhi
sbackdownt
ryi
ngt
odustt
hedi
rt
yof
fthe
di
rt
yonhisshi
rt
.
“
Iam t
alki
ngt
oyou!
”
“
Iwaspl
ayi
ng.
”
“
Whatsor
tofgamewer
eyoupl
ayi
ngt
haty
ouendup
l
ookingl
ikethi
s?Haveyouseenyourhead?Koore
can’
tyoujustt
rynott
oplaywit
hdirtf
oronce?”
Hel
ookeddown.“
Sor
ry.
”
“
Youcan’
tsaysor
ry,
whatdi
dIsayi
nthemor
ning?
”
Thei
rteachercameoutsmi
l
ing.
“
Hi…”
Kennyl
ookedatherandsi
ghed.“
Hi.
”
“
Eish,
boy
s!Hespi
l
ledy
oghur
tint
hemor
ning.
”
Kennyl
ookedathi
sbackget
ti
ngev
enmor
eangr
ier
.
“Gi
vemethatbag.
”
Hehandeditov
erthensheopenedandl
ookedi
nsi
de.
Theyoghur
thadspolttheent
ir
ebag.
“
Thanks,
Qui
ntonl
et’
sgo.
”
Hesl
owlyfol
lowedbehi
ndhert
hengoti
nthecar
.
Shet
urnedtohim.
“
Whycan’
tyoupl
aynor
mal
games?
”
Hel
ookeddownf
iddl
i
ngwi
thhi
sfi
nger
s.
“
Iam t
alki
ngt
oyou!
”
Tear
sfi
l
ledhi
sey
es.
“Don’teventryit!Iwi
llgi
veyouareasontocry.
Koorey oulooklikeghost,ot
herki
dsdon’tl
ookli
ke
that
.”Kennysi ghedthenstart
edthecaranddrove
home.Hest eppedoutwi t
hherthentheybot
h
walkedinsidethehouse.Amber ’
sjawdroppi
ngon
thefl
oorasshel ookedatQ.
“
Jesus!
”
Kennygaveherthebag.“Iam ti
redoft
alki
ng.May
be
hi
sfathercangetthr
ought ohi
m.Iam taki
nga
pi
ctur
ebecauseIhav ehadit.
”
Kennytookacoupleofpicturesandsentthem t
o
herfat
her.Ronai
mmedi atelycal
ledback.
“
Hey
..
”
“
Didy
ouseewhatIwast
alki
ngabout
?”
Helaughed.“
Babei
t’
ski
ndofnor
mal
,boy
sli
ke
pl
aying.
”
“
Iknowbutcany ouseehowheislooki
ngli
ke?Il
ong
t
oldyoutoaddresst
hiswit
hhim.Helooksl
ikehe
wasbeingr
oll
edont hesoi
l
.”
“
Hei
sjustbei
ngaboy
.”
“Idon’
tdisputethat
,karetal
ktohim.Hejustcan’
tbe
l
ookingli
ket hi
s,ever
yday?Imagi
necleani
nghis
messupev ery
day.Talktohi
m becauseseemsl i
keI
am fai
li
ng.”
“
Maybeifyouspokesof
tl
ywi
thouty
ell
i
ngathi
m he
woul
dli
sten.
”
Kennywalkedtot hebedroom.“
Whatdoyoumean
wit
houtyell
ing?Areyousay i
ngIam al
waysy
ell
ingat
myson?Ist hatyourpoint
?SoIcan’
tscol
dhim
anymore?”
Ronasi
ghed.“
No.Iam j
ust
…babeIj
ust
…Iwi
l
ltal
k
tohi
m.”
“No.Justsayi
t,Iam al
way
syel
l
ingatmyson
akere?
”
“
Jeso!
”
“Ican’
trepr
imandmysonany mor
ebecauseIam
alwaysyell
i
ng.I
t’
sfi
ne.Ihav
eheardyou.
”
“
Thati
snotwhatImeantcomeon…”
“
Iasky
out
otal
ktoQbecausehei
sal
way
scomi
ng
backdi
rtyandyousaymay beifIspoketohi
m soft
ly
hewouldactual
l
yli
sten.Iam notcrazy
.Icanhear
youper
fectl
y.Gosharp.
”
“
Babecomeon…Idi
dn’
t-
“
Kennyhungupt
hensatdownbl
i
nki
ngawayher
tear
s.

*
**

I
nRona’soffi
ce,At
sil
elaughedst
ari
ngatRonaashe
tr
iedt
ocallKennybackbutshewasn’tpi
cki
ng.He
puthi
shandsonhisface.
“
Jesus!
”
“
Youar
eal
way
sint
roubl
e.”
“Becauseeveryt
hingIsayal waysgetstwisted.I
can’tmakejokesany more,sheisalwayscry i
ng.I
can’tdoanythi
ngrighti
nherey es,it
’sonefightaft
er
theother
.It
’sli
keshehat esme.Ihav en’thadanyin
twoweeksnow, mothoot l
holaangadi l
eebi l
ewa
ntena.(
Sheisalway sangryit’
spissi
ngmeof f.
)”
“I
sn’
titt
hehormones?Youwant
edachi
l
dsobad
andnowt her
eiti
s.”
“Ij
ustwantmybabeback.Justt womont hsback
duri
ngthemagadinegoti
ati
onsitwassoni cebut
thi
ngshavechanged.Sheli
teral
l
yhatesme, the
momentIwalkintothedoor,shestart
sshouting.I
can’
twaitt
il
lshegivesbi
rt
h.Any ways,whatwer e
yousayi
ng?”
Atsi
leslippedbacki nt
obusinessmode,t
hey
di
scussedaf ewthingsbeforehefi
nal
lywal
kedout
ofhisoffice.Ronalookedattheti
meandconti
nued
working,thethoughtofgoingbackhomedrai
ning
hi
m al r
eady .

*
**

Maatl
adrov
ethroughthegat
etal
ki
ngont
hephone
t
alki
ngonhisphone.
“
Iwantt
oseemyki
dsBof
elo.
”
“
Itol
dyouIam st
ayi
ngf
ar,
theywi
l
lcomet
her
e.”
“
Whyar
eyoudoi
ngt
his?
”
“Doi
ngwhat?Thisi
sjusthowy ouusedtot r
eatthem.
Youwerenotapresentfat
herinthei
rli
ves,t
his
arr
angementshoul
dn’tbeaprobl
em toy ou.
”
“
Ihaven’
tseenmyki
dsinalmost9monthsnow.Can
youst
opthis?Ompat
lang?(Whatdoy
ouwantfrom
me?)”
“
Iam busy
,youar
edi
stur
bingme.
”
Shehungupt henhesighedsadlyparki
ngthecar.
Thenannyhehadj usthi
redlookedathim ashe
steppedoutofthecar,
allt
hesoldier
sshehadcame
acrossal
way sl
ookedscarybutthisonedidn’
tlook
thatscar
y.Shefoll
owedhimi nsi
dethebeauti
ful
householdi
ngherbag.
Hiskidswhower einthesitti
ngroom t
urnedtohim,
theyoungestoneranov erandhuggedhim whilethe
olderonejustsmil
ed.Hepi ckedhi
m upandt hrew
himintheair.Hi
ssonl aughedashisfathercaught
him,heputhim down.
“Uhsot hesear
emykids,t
hat’
sKago,heisthe
oldest
,heis13andt
hisisyoungerbr
otherLet
habo,
hei s10.Guy sthi
si saunt yNamet so, shewi l
lbe
stayingwi thushel pingmet akecareofy ouguy stil
l
mamacomesback.Theybot hgot othesame
school andtheirschool buspi cksthem upat7soby
thent heyshoul dber eady .Iwantmyki dstolook
clean, Idon’twantt hem tol ookli
kehobos.Iwas
tryi
ngt ot eachthem howt ocl eanafterthemsel ves
butIt hinkIhav ebeenf aili
ng.“Hesmi l
ed.“Butnow
thaty ouar ehereIwantt hem t ol
earnhowt odo
thingsf orthemselv es.Noonecanbeatmyki ds.I
don’tpl aythere.Youwi llnotbeatorspankmyki ds.
”
“
Ok.
”
“Thi
sisthesi
tt
ingr
oom,
come,
letmeshowy
out
he
kit
chen.
”
Hewalkedt
ot heki
tchen,
Nametsosmil
edatthe
ki
dswhosmiledbackatherbef
orecont
inui
ngwith
watchi
ngTV.
“Ok,t
hisi
stheki
tchen.Ever
ythi
ngist
herebuti
f
ther
eissomethi
ngneeded,feelf
reet
otell
mesoI
cangiveyoumoneyforit
.Canyoudri
ve?”
“
Yessi
r.
”
“Cal
lmeMaat l
a.Goodi
fyoucandri
ve,youwil
luse
thesmal
lercari
nthegar
ageforr
unningerr
ands.
Come..
”
Theywenttothebedroomsasheshowedher
aroundt
il
ltheyent
eredthemast
erbedr
oom.
“Thisi smybedr oom, y
oual socl eani nsi
deher e.You
j
ustcl eant hewhol ehouse.Il ikeacl eanhousesoI
willexpectt hehouset obecl eanatal lti
mes, my
clothesshoul dalsobecl eanandi roned.WhenI
comebackf rom wor kIwantt owalki nfresh
smel li
nghouse.Ihopey oucancookgoodf ood,Il
i
ke
eat i
ngandIl i
keeatinggoodf ood.Ther easonwhyI
hiredy oui sbecauseInol ongerwantt of eedthe
boy st akeaways,it
’sgettingol d.Youar esmar t
consi deringthefactthaty ouhav eadegr eesoI
expecty outoalsohel ptheki dswi t
ht heirhome-
wor ks.Youwi l
lbesleepingi nt heotherr oom.Any
quest ions?”
Hespoketofi
rml
y,ev
erywor
dhesaidcameoutl
oud
andcl
earashi
sadam’sappl
emoved.
“
Whataboutout
side?
”
“Youdoitt
oo.Ther
eispav
ementt
hroughoutsoy
ou
sweepit
.”
“
P3k.
”
Maatlasmil
ed,hehadsuchacut esmil
e.Shehad
neverseensuchagoodlookingsol
dier
,hewasso
cuteandappeti
zi
ng.Shelookedathi
smuscledbody
fi
guri
ngitwasbecauseofhisjob.
“
Ok,
P3000i
sfi
ne.
”
“Um canIask?Wher
eist
hei
rmot
her
?Wi
l
lsheal
so
bestayi
nghere?
”
“No,shei
scur
rentl
ynother
ebutwhenshecomes
backwecanre-
visi
tthesal
ary
.”
Namet
sosmi
l
ed.“
Ok.
”
“Youcangoandputyourbagi
nyourroom t
hen
comemakedinner
.Iam sohungr
y.”
“
Ok.
”
Shet
urnedandwal
kedt
oherr
oom.

*
**
Lateraroundeighti
nt heeveni
ng,
Ronawalked
i
nsidet hehousethenlookedatKennywhowas
watchingTv.Hewal kedoverandleanedov
ert
oki
ss
herbutshemov edherhead.
“
Wher
ear
eyoucomi
ngf
rom?
”
“
Huh?
”
“
Youhear
dme,
wher
ear
eyoucomi
ngf
rom?
”
“
Wor
k.”
“
Wor
katt
hist
ime?
”
“
Ihadacoupl
eoft
hingsIhadt
ofi
nishup.
”
“
Whatt
hingsRona?Whatt
hings?
”
“
Iam pr
epar
ingf
ort
hecompany
’sanni
ver
sar
y.”
“
Thenwhatdoesy
ourPAdowhenyoudoherwor
k?
Whodoyouthi
nkyouar
ely
ingt
o?”
Shest
oodupl
ooki
ngathi
m angr
il
yasherbump
st
uckout
.
“
Iwasatwor
kIswear
.”
“Youarel
ying!Whoworksti
l
lthi
sti
me?Youar
enot
goingt
omakemeaf oolt
wice.Wher
ear
eyou
comingfr
om? ”
Hesighed.“
Iam f
rom workIswear.Babecomeon…
youwil
lcheckt
heCCTVf ootagetomorroworwe
cangonowt odoubl
echeck.Iwasatwor ktheent
ir
e
ti
me.”
Tearsfi
l
ledKenny’
seyes,
hehadal
waysbeenagood
l
iarandnothi
ngcouldmakehi
mtel
lthet
rut
h.
“Whyareyoudoi
ngthi
stome?Soyouhadt
owaitti
l
l
Igetpr
egnantf
oryout
ostar
tbehav
ingl
i
kethi
s?”
Ronast
oodup.“
Iam goi
ngt
otakeashower
.”
“
Whyar
eyoudoi
ngt
hist
ome?
”
“Nooneisdoinganyt
hingtoyou,
Iwasawork.Can
youst
opthis?Ilov
ey ou.Youmustbet
ir
ed,
let
’sgo
andbat
ht hensl
eep.”
“Youar
enotsleepi
nginmyhouseti
lly
out el
lme
whereyouarecomingfr
om.Youknockoffat6,what
t
imeisitri
ghtnow?Wherear
eyoucomi ngfrom?
Givemeyourphone.”
Hesighedandhandeditover
.Kennyunl ockedi
t
thentappedonhiswhat
sapp.Ronal ookedather
recal
l
inghowhehadbeencompl ai
ningabouthert
o
hisbrother
sthenqui
ckl
ysnatchedthephone.
“Kant
ewhycan’ tyouj
usttrustme?Iloveyou,Iwas
atwork,Ihadalottodo.Iam notgoi
ngt oli
stent
o
youtryaccusi
ngmeofnonsensebecausey ouare
l
ookingforafight
.Iam goi
ngt osl
eep.”
Hewalkedtothebedr
oom l
eavi
ngherstandi
ngther
e.
Kenny’
sli
pstr
embledthenshecov
eredherface
cr
ying.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#73

Thef oll
owingmor ni
ng, around5a. m Ronarubbed
hisboneronKenny ’
sbut tkissingherneck.He
slowlyopenedhisey esandl ookedatherst il
l
sleeping.Herubbedhisdi ckonhergl adsheno
l
ongersl eptwit
hherpant i
esany mor e.Hepull
edher
closerthenpushedhi sdickbet weenherbut tcheeks
andt ouchedherpussywi thhist i
p.Hecoul dalmost
feeltheheatcomi ngfrom itandal l heneededt odo
wasj ustpushthroughandsi nki nthatsweetpussy .
Hekissedherneckthenpushedevenmor epar
ti
ng
herpussyl
ipssqueezi
ngintheti
prightt
hroughher
entr
ance.
Inhersl
eep,Kennyfel
tsomethi
ngthenslowl
y
openedhereyesasRonabreathedheav
il
yonher
squeezi
nghimselfi
nsi
dewithgrunt
.
“
Fuck!
”
Angr
il
y,shepushedhi
m backt
henl
ookedathi
m.
“Sonowyouwouldr
atherr
apemenowaf
tery
ou
comehomeateight
?”
Helookedatherholdinghisthr
obbi
ngdick.“
Iam
sor
rybabe…tonightIwillcomebackatfi
ve.Iwasat
work,Iswear
.Youar ekil
l
ingmehere.”
“Idon’twanttohav esexwi thy ou.Koorehelay ou
j
ustcan’tactr i
ght,youjusthav etobepushedt odo
somet hi
ng.Youdon’ tev enrespectmeasy ourwife,
youwentandpai dmagadi formeRona, Iam good
asy ourwife.Youshoul drespectmeoratl eastyour
son.Hesl eptwithoutseeingy ouy est
erdaywhi l
eyou
wher eGodknowswher e.Iam sosi ckandt i
redof
youmaki ngmef eelinsecure.
”
Helookedatherandsi
ghedhol
dinghi
sdick.“
Iam
sor
rybabe,Iwil
ldobet
ter
.”Het
ri
edtokissherbut
shemov edback.
“Nnakegor ewantenahel
a.Iam notgoi
ngt
ohav
e
sexwi t
hyoubecauseyouwanttogiveme
diseases.
”
“
Diseasesf
rom wher
e?Iam notcheat
ingony
ou.
”
“
Youar
eagoodl
i
arsowhoknows?
”
Het ookadeepbreat
hstari
ngather,hewantedsex
sobadhewonder edifhefor
cedhimselfwoulditbe
rape?Eit
herway,
shewasasgoodashi swife…that
couldn’
tberaper
ight
?Hi seyeswenttoherbreast
thendownherthi
ghsashi sdickgotev
enhar der
.
“Kooreal i
ttl
erespecti
swhatIam aski ngf or.When
youcomeat8whatdoy ouexpectmet othink?It
ry
tocallyourphoneandy oudon’ tev
enpi ck.Youdon’t
evencall meany moreunlessIcallyou.Theny ou
snatchedy ourphonelastnightandy ouwantmet o
beli
evey ouareinnocent.
”
Hervoicest art
edtoshakeasshewenton.“ Whyare
youdoingt histome?Youjustli
keseeingitwhenI
am hurti
ng.Doy our
eali
zehowwor ri
edIwasabout
youlastnight?Whycan’tyoujustl
eavemei fyou
don’
twantmeany more?KanarraIam notfor
cing
youtobewi thme.”
Hesighedsit
ti
ngagai
nstthebedasshesatbesi
de
hi
m scoldi
nghimforatl
eastthi
rt
yminut
es.
“Iam sleepi
ng.I
t’
spoi
ntl
esstohavet
his
conversati
onwhenyouarenotevenl
i
steni
ngt
ome.
”
Shelai
ddownsni
ff
ing.Helookedatherforawhi
l
e
thenfi
nal
l
ygotupt
ot akeacoldshower.

*
**

Anhourlat
er,
Qsmiledast heyfi
nishedprepar
ing
breakf
astwi
thhi
sfather.Theyputevery
thingont he
tabl
e.Ronagr
abbedav aseandputf l
owersinside.
“
Anddone!
”
Ronasmil
ed.“
Yesmyboy,Iam sur
eshei
sgoi
ngt
o
comeoutanysecondf
rom now.
”
“
Isshest
il
langr
yatme?
”
“It
hinkso.Youshoul dapologi
ze.See…mommyi s
carr
yingyourli
tt
lesisterandsheisst ressedin
general
.It’
sourduty,meandy outomaket hi
ngs
easi
erforher.Youcomi ngbackf rom school al
ldir
ty
i
supset t
inghersoy oushouldapol ogizeforthatand
meani t
.Todaywhenshecomest opicky ouup,she
shouldfi
ndy ouall
clean,from headt otoe.Youwant
mamahappyr i
ght?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Thenkeepcl
ean.Weshoul
dkeepherhappy
.”
“Ok,butsomet
imesshei
sreall
yscarywhen
shouti
ng.Andshei
salwaysangry
.”
Ronal
aughed.“
Neversaythatt
oherf
ace.I
t’
sthe
babymaki
ngherdothat.
”
Theyheardthedooropeni ngthentheywai
tedf
orher
ti
l
lshewalkedin.Ronal ookedatherasshewalked
i
nadr essandherf ourinchblockheel
swhil
eholdi
ng
herhandbag,herhairti
edintoabun.
Shel
ookedatt
hesetupt
henl
ookedatt
heboy
s.
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“Wemadey oubreakfast
.Iam sor
ryforcomi ngback
l
atel
astnightandformakingyouthinkall
t haty
ou
aret
hinki
ng.Iam i
nnocentIswear.Ilov
ey ouandI
appr
eciat
ey ou.
”
Qclear
edhisthr
oat .“
Iam al
sosorrymamaf or
comingbackdir
ty,Iam notgoi
ngtoplayonthesoi
l
anymoreandIwill
comebackcl ean.Iam sor
ryI
madey oumad.”
Shesmiledst
aringatt
hebr
eakf
ast
.“Iam al
sosor
ry
fory
ell
i
ngaty ou.”
Ronapull
edoutthechai
rforhert
henshesatdown
stari
ngatt
hefood.Shel
ookedatRona.“
Youmade
this?
”
“
Yeah…”
Shenoddedt henst ar
tedeati
ng.Awhilelat
ershegot
i
nt hecarwit
hQt henRonawal kedoverandstood
bythedoorwat chingherdri
veof f
.Hewasst i
l
l bei
ng
servedwit
hacol dshoulder.Hegotinhiscarand
drovetowork.

*
**

Atwork, i
nherlongpinkbot t
omsandbody condress,
Yaonewal kedinsi
deMot samai RealEstat
etalki
ng
onherphonet henflashedasmi leattherecepti
oni
st
goingtotheelevat
or.Shegott oherdeskandsat
downt aki
ngouthermi rrorandfixedheralr
eady
fl
awlessmake- up.
“
NyaaIheary
ou,
Iam happyaboutt
hepr
ogr
ess.
”
“Iam happyy ouarehappy,t
otahonestl
yasabui l
der
nothi
ngmakesmehappyt hanahappycust omerso
thatwheny oufinal
lypayme,lewenay oudon’tf
eel
l
ikeyouar ejustpayi
ngmef ornoreason.”
“
Iwi
l
lcomebydur
ingt
heweekendandt
akeal
ook.
”
“
Ok,
seey
ou.
”
“
Bye.
”
Hehungupt hensheputhercompactmi rr
ordown
andsortedherdeskbeforewalkinginsideherboss’s
offi
ceandcleani
ngupr ealqui
ckly.Shepackedt he
fi
lessmartl
ythenopenedhi swindowsbef ore
sprayi
ngairfr
esheneri
nsidetheof f
ice.Ronawal ked
i
nassheputbackt heairf
reshenerthenhel ooked
athersit
ti
ng.
“Morni
ngMr .Mot samai..Mr.Eji
m Ol
awuwaandhi s
part
ner,Mr.IkeobiEkuruhaveconfir
medt hatthey
wil
lbearrivi
ngher ei
nGabst odaybuttheyare
i
mmedi atel
yf ly
ingtoKasane,Ihavespokent oMr .
Eji
m’sassistantbackinNigeriaandhaveseta9
o’
clockmeet ingfortomorrowmor ni
ng.Youflight
ti
ckethavealreadybeenset ,
youleavetoni
ght.Aft
er
yourmeetingtomor row,youaregoingtohaveto
meetwi t
hMr .Batsho,sincefr
om Kasaneyouar e
goingtoMaunIhav esetameet i
ngwi t
hhim and
havemanagedt oalsosqueezeinMr .Ndl
ovu.Kil
l
twobirdswithonest one.”
I
mpr
essed,
Ronasmi
l
ed.“
Wow!
”
“
From t
herey
ouhav et
ogoandr
evi
ewthathot
el.I
t’
s
agoodthi
ngthaty
ouaregoi
ngt
her
e.”
“
Youwi
llgoandrev
iewt
hebui
l
ding.Imi
ghtt
ake
t
imewi
ththoset
wo.”
“
YoumeanIshoul
dcomewi
th?
”
“
Yes,
it’
sforonedayr
ight
?”
“
Yessi
r.Wewi
l
lbecomi
ngbackt
omor
row.
”
“
Thenthat’
ssort
ed.Canyougett
hosechocolat
es
l
i
kethelastti
meforKenny,
accompanythem wi
th
f
lower
s.”
“Uhhowaboutacakerat
her?Sher
eal
l
yli
kedt
he
cakeyougotherl
astt
ime.
”
“
Ok,
that
’sok.
”
“
Iwi
l
lgeti
ntoi
tri
ghtnow.
”
“
Didy
oudel
i
verherdr
essf
orFr
iday
?”
“
Yessi
r,i
twasdel
i
ver
edl
astweek.
”
“
Ihopey
ougothermeasur
ement
sri
ght
.”
“
Idi
d.Mi
kecal
l
ed.
”
“
Iwi
l
ltal
ktohi
m.Wher
eishi
sfi
l
e?”
Yaonebendedl ookingfori
tatthelowershel
f.He
swallowedl ookingawaybuthel ookedatheragai
n
ashisdi ckjerkedinhispant
s.Hepour edhi
mself
waterandt ookasi ptryi
ngtogetr i
dofhisdi
rty
thoughts,fuck!Allhehadtodowasbepat i
entwit
h
hisgirl
,Yaoneputt hef i
l
ebefor
ehi m andnowhe
sawal lhehaddeni edhimselft
oseeal lt
hese
mont hs.
“
Ther
e.”
Hecl
ear
edhi
sthr
oat
.“Thanks.
”
Shewal
kedout
,herheel
sechoi
ngont
hef
loor
.

*
**
Maatl
asati
nhisbedr
oom st
ari
ngatt
hedivor
ce
paper
s,het
ookouthi
sphoneandcal
ledhi
slawyer
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Kant
ecan’
tIr
efuset
hisdi
vor
ce?
”
“No,
y ouhavehadthosepaper
sfortwomonthsnow.
Sheisgoingtogoaheadandtakeyoutocour
t.
”
“
Idon’
twantadi
vor
ce.
”
“
Itseemsshehasmadeuphermi
nd.
”
“
Sot
her
eisnot
hingy
oucando?
”
“Nothing.Thedi
vorceisgoingt
ogothr
ough.Youare
goingt ogetadat
esoy oucanmenti
ony our
sel
fko
court.Weshouldjustbeprepar
edf
orthat.
”
Heswall
owedt
ear
ful
l
y.“
Ican’
tbel
i
evet
hisi
s
happeni
ng.
”
“Youcantr
ytal
kingt
oherandconvinceher
other
wisebutmmehelaIcan’
treal
l
ydoany t
hingt
o
rever
sewhatshesai
d.”
“
Ok,
sur
ethanks.
”
“
Cool
.”
Hehungupandt ri
edhernumberagainbuti
twas
sti
llnotgoi
ngt
hrough.Heknewshewaswi t
hhim,
thathehadnodoubt.Hecal
ledacoll
eague.
“
Tlhemonnawar
eomot
hakaol
eokae?
”
Hiscolleaguechuckl ed.“Youwi llnev erknowwher e
peoplelikehim are,theyst ayi nhiding.Hemi ghtbe
i
nonepl acetodayt hennextt hinghei snotthere.Ke
topdogmot hoole.I fhewant s,hewi lljustt
akey ou
outjustlikethatamdgapehehasconnect i
ons.I
knowy ourwi fe’
sissuei sst ressingy ououtbuti fshe
real
l
yi swi t
hhi mthenf or
geti tunl essshewant sto
l
eavehi m.Hi m personal l
ywi llnev erbudge,hei sa
l
ikeabl ackmamba, readyt oat tackatanysuspect
ofdanger .”
“
Ilov
emywi
fe.
”
“Iknowlai
takabutIam bei ngreal
withy ou.Your
kidsneedyoual i
ve.Thoseguy sar
etrainedtokil
l,
theyareki
ll
ermachi nes.Theygetpaidtokill
.But
anywaysIwillkeeptryi
ngtot r
ackhim down. ”
“
Thanks.
”
HehungupasNamet
sosof
tl
yknockedont
hedoor
t
henwalkedi
n.
“
Iam her
efory
ourdi
rt
ycl
othes.
”
Hepoi nt
edatt hewashingbaskett
henshewal ked
overandt ookit,
hereyesfal
li
ngonthedivorce
papersonhi sbed.Shequickl
ywalkedoutthenwent
tothewashi ngmachineasherphonerang.She
smiledpicking.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Heybabe,
howi
sit
?”
“
Gosharphel
a,themanisqui
etIguess,heonl
yhas
t
wokidsandthehousei
smanageable.”
“
Iam st
il
lnotcomf
ort
abl
ewi
tht
hissetup.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Arey
ourj
eal
ous?
”
Rebaonelaughed.“
Ofcause,
gapekanababeo
montle.
”
“
Iam f
ait
hful
.Noneedt
owor
ry.
”
“
Ok,
Iwi
l
lcal
lyoul
ater
.Letmegetbackt
owor
k.”
“
Ok.
”
*
**

Nanaofi
xedherdresswalki
nginsi
deMot
husi
’s
of
fi
cearoundlunchhour
.Het ur
nedhi
sheadand
l
ookedather.
“
Ibr
oughtl
unch.
”
“
Ial
readyat
emyl
unch.
”
Sheroll
edhereyesthenwalkedf
urt
heri
nsi
det he
offi
ceandunpackedthehomecookedfood.Sheput
i
tbeforehi
m, Mothusil
ookedatt
hemouthwat er
ing
food.
“
Itol
dyouIal
readyat
e.”
“Cany oupl
easeeat?Youarelosingweight
.Your
shir
tlooksuni
ronedgape,
it’
slikeit
’sf
rom acow’s
mout h.”
“
Idon’
tknowwhatyouaredoi
ngi
nmyof
fi
ce.Idon’
t
wanty
ou.Pl
easel
eave.
”
Shewal
kedt
othedoorandl
ockedi
t,her
engagementr
ingonherf i
nger
.Shewal kedbackto
hi
m ashelookedather.Shewalkedroundhistabl
e
andpushedhischai
rbackthenkneltbeforehi
m
undoinghi
sbelt
.
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ng?Youj
ustcan’
t-
“
Sheunzi
ppedhi
spant
sthent
ookouthi
sdi
ck
st
roki
ngit
.
“Iam notlosi
ngy ou,notwhenIhaveonlymadeone
mistake.Ilov
ey ou.Youarenotgoingtoleav
eme
afterf
iveyears.Keagana.(
Iam ref
using.
)”
Sheopenedhermout hthent ookhi
mi nwhi l
ehe
grunted.Shestrokedt hebaseofhisdickboppi ng
herheadupanddownhi sdickwhil
ehegr oaned.
Mot husigrunt
edasshecont i
nuedsuckinghisdick,
hehel dherheadandt hr
ustf r
om beneathtapping
herthroat.Hewentonf ast
erasshegaggedt hen
sher ai
sedherheadandst raddledhi
m, herdress
ri
singtoherwai st.Sheheldhi sdi
ckinplaceand
sl
owl ysatdownl etti
nghim sinkin.
“
Iam sor
rybaby
…itwi
l
lnev
erhappenev
eragai
n.”
*
**

Laterthatday
,Ronawalkedi
nsi
deKenny’
soffi
ceas
shepackedup.Heclosedherdoorandsmil
ed
stari
ngather.
“
Hey
…”
Shel
ookedathi
m.“
Whati
sit
?”
Hewal kedov
erandki
ssedher
.“Ar
eyousti
llmad?I
askedYaonetoshowyoutheCCTVfoot
age.Iwas
herethewholet
ime.
”
Shesmil
ed.“Iam sor
ryforaccusi
ngyoubutIj
ust
don’
tunder
standwhyy ouwouldstayher
eti
lll
ate.
”
“Ij
usthadacoupleofthi
ngsIwantedtofi
nishup.I
am goingtoKasanet
omeetwi t
hthatguyfrom
Niger
ia.”
“
Final
l
ymanagedt
ogetameet
ing?
”
“
Yes.Comewi
thme.Wewi
l
lbecomi
ngback
t
omorrow.
”
“
WhataboutQ?
”
“
Amberi
sther
e.Comeonbabe…”
“
Ireal
l
ywantt
obutIcan’
t.Ihav
eanimpor
tant
meeti
ngt
omorrowwi
ththeteam.”
“
Someonecanal
way
sdot
hat
.”
“Ihavebeenstayi
nghomef orawhil
enow, Ihaveto
catchupwhenIam wel l
.Justgo,
Iwillgowithyou
nextti
megapey ouwon’tevenhavetimeforme
becauseyouwi l
lbebusy.Youwil
lfi
ndmeher e.I
l
ov edthefl
owersandthecakebytheway .
”
Ronaputhi
shandsonherwai
stt
henki
ssedher
.
Kennymovedbackwi
thasmil
e.
“Qiswai
ti
ng,l
etmegoandgethi m befor
ehe
deci
destobapt
izehi
msel
findir
t.Iwillmeetyouat
homesoIcanpackyourbag.Whatt i
meisy our
ti
cket
?”
“
Int
wohour
s.”
“
Ok.
”
Shewalkedoutthenwenttohercarwher
eshesat
downforawhilebefor
etaki
ngoutherphonecal
l
ing
Esi
.
“
Lov
er…”
“
Mma,
isi
tnor
mal
tonott
owantt
ohav
esex?
”
“
Eng?(
What
?)”
“Idon’
twantt ohav esex,wheneverRonaget scl
ose
tomenkar enkakgwa( Ifeel
likevomiti
ng)andIcan
seehei sreall
yt r
ying.”Shesighed.“It
houghtt hi
s
pregnancywoul dbet hebestexper i
encebutIj ust
don’twanthi m cl
oset ome.Igetsoangr ywhenhe
touchesmebutwhenhei sfarnkarenkal ela(If
eel
l
ikecrying.)
.Iwantt osleepnothav esex, i
s
somet hingwrongwi t
hme?Idon’ tfeeli
nterestedin
sexany mor eandRonai sgetti
ngimpatient.Idon’
t
knowwhatt odo.”
Esi
bur
stoutl
aughi
ng.“
Pregnancyi
str
icky
.”
Kennysighedtear
full
y.“
Ifeelli
keIam si
ck.MaybeI
haveprenatal
depressi
on.IjustgetsoangryandI
am yel
l
ingatmyson…If eelsosad.”
“Ther
eisnothingli
kepr
enatalwhatwhat…it
’sj
ust
hormones.Youcancontrol
it.I
t’
spartofpr
egnancy
.
Youwill
bef i
ne.”
“KanaEsithispregnancyisnotevenexci
ti
ngme.It
didn’
tfeel
likethiswit
hQ.Ijustfeel
…Idon’tev
en
connectwiththisbaby.”
“Youarej
ustov
eremot
ional
Kenny
,pr
egnanci
es
dif
fer
,youj
ustt
akei
tonedayatat
ime.
”
“
Iguessy
ouar
eri
ght
.Howi
sSean?
”
Esigiggl
ed.“Iam wait
ingf
orthedi
vorcetobe
fi
nali
zedsoIcanenj oythi
sman,kanaIam not
gett
ingany,gatweIam goingtof
ucky ouonl
yaft
er
youar enolongermarri
ed.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Soi
t’
sreal
l
yov
erwi
thMaat
la?
”
“
Tlhammai
t’
ssoov
er.Li
kei
t’
sov
erov
er.
”
“
Ok,
wel
lwewi
l
ltal
k.Iam goi
ngt
opi
ckQ.
”
“
Okshar
p.”
Kennyputt
hephonedownt
hendr
oveof
f.
.
.
Don'
tfor
gett
oli
keandcommentaf
tery
our
ead
fami
ly
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#74

Tshenol owal kedi nsi

deherhousehol dingsome
fi
lesfrom wor k.Shetookof fhershoesandsmi led
watchingasherki dsdancedt oaNigeri
anhitsong.
Sheputherbagt oget
herwi ththefi
l
esont hecouch
thenjoinedt hem danci ng.Thesongf i
nall
yended
thenTshenol othr ewherselfonthecouchbreathing
heavi
lyl aughing.
“
Wher
eisy
ourdad?
”
Herdaught
ershookherhead.“
Hei
snothomey
et.
”
Tshenolofr
owned.“
Oh?Andr
eawhatdidIsayabout
thedoor?Youshoul
dal
wayslocki
tify
ouguysare
alone.
”
“
Ifor
got
.”
“
Nextt
imej
ustl
ock.
”
Shetookherbagandfil
estothebedroom t
hensat
onthebedcall
ingKgosi
.Hisphonejustr
angwit
hout
answer.Shesi
ghedthenundr
essedsuspecti
nghe
wassor
tingouthi
sbusi
ness.Shel
ookedather
phonet
hencall
edKenny.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Babymama.
.”
Kennychuckl
ed.“
Hey
,howi
sitgoi
ng?
”
“
Ishoul
dbeaski
ngy
out
hat
.Howar
eyou?
”
“
AhhIam f
ine.
”
“
Kanapr
egnancyi
sonehel
lofaj
our
ney
.”
“
Ihat
eRona.
”
“
What
?”
“IhateRona.Ir
eall
ydo.Ican’tbeli
eveIhat
ethevery
samemanIcan’ tl
i
vewithout.Ican’
twaitt
il
lIgi
ve
bir
th.Keasokola.(
Iam suff
ering.
)”
Nololaughed.“
Wi t
hAndreaIcan’
tsayIhatedKgosi
buthejustannoyedme.Butyoujustdealwit
hitand
mov eon.Kanasometimesyoucanj ustcont
rol
the
emotions.
”
Kennyst
art
edcry
ing.“
Ican’
tcont
rol
it.Ihat
ehi
m.I
hat
esex.Ij
ust
…”
“Shhh…it’
spartofi
t.Igety ouaresaying.I
t’
spartof
thepackageandheshoul ddeal withit
.Akerethe
fi
rstti
mehenev ergottodeal wit
hi t
.Thisti
me
aroundit
’sGodpunishinghi m.Pregnancyhormones
arealwaystheworst,y
our sespecial
ly,Imeanthe
l
asttimey oual
mostkilledsomeone. ”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Wil
lany
oneev
erf
orgett
hat
?”
“
Nope!
”
“
Imissmmama.GodImi sst
hatwomansomuch.I
wonderwhatshewoul
dbesayi
ngnow.
”
“
Obviousl
ysomethi
ngwi
se.Youar
egoi
ngt
obef
ine.
Whatgenderi
sit
?”
“
May
begi
rl
s”
“
Huh?
”
Kennychuckl
ed.“I
t’
sagirlt
henwecouldn’
tseethe
otheroneonthescanbecauseheorsheishi
ding
behindtheot
her.
”
“
No!
”
“
Nooneknows.Justmeandt
hedoct
or.
”
“
OhmyGod!
”
Shel
aughed.“
Iknow.
”
“
Talkaboutdoubl
ebl
essi
ngs.May
bet
heyar
egi
rl
s,
i
denti
cal
.”
“
Hopeful
l
ynot
.Idon’
tthi
nkIwoul
dbeabl
etohandl
e
t
hat
.”
“Nowt hatexpl
ainswhyyourhor
monesareext
ra,
it’
s
becausethereisanextr
abeingther
e.”
Kennysighed.“Iwantt
osurpriseRonawhenIgi ve
bi
rth.Hethinkswearejusthavingone.Thegirl
.I
di
dn’ttel
lhi
m abouttheother.Ican’twaitt
oseethe
l
ookonhi sf acewhenIpushoutt heotherone.
”
“
Poorguy
!Iam sohappyf
ory
ou.
”
“
Iam ner
vous.
”
“Youhaveeveryri
ghttobe.Butremember,youcan
alwayscontr
olyoursel
f.Somet
imesyouwantt o
shout,j
ustgotoyourbedroom andcr
y.Iusedtodo
that
.”
“Iwi
l
lrememberthatj
ustt
hatwhenIseeRonankar
e
nkamogatamolal
a.”
“Ngng,don’
tki
llr
ragweQ.”Nolofrownedas
someoneknockedonthedoor.“Kenny,Ihav
etogo.
Gosharpmmagwedi t
wins!
”
“
Bye.
”
Nolowalkedtothedoorandopened.Shef
rowned
st
aringatthepoli
ce.
“
Dumel
ang…”
“
Mrs.Di
sang,
wehav
easear
chwar
rantt
osear
ch
t
hehouse.
”
Nol
ofr
owned.“
What
?”
“Pl
easel
etusdoourj
obsowecanbeoutofy
our
hai
r.
”
Tshenol
omov
edf
rom t
hedoorcal
l
ingKgosi
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
Iam onmywayhome.
”
“
Thepoli
ceisher
e,t
heyar
esear
chi
ngt
hehouse.
What
’sgoingon?
”
“
Shi
t!
”
Nol
o’shear
tski
pped.“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Remai
ncal
m.St
aywi
tht
heki
ds.Iam comi
ng.
”
“
Kgosi
-“
“
Iam comi
ng.
”
Hedr
oppedthecal
l.Nol
owalkedt
otheki
dswhi
l
e
t
hepol
icesear
chedthehouse.

*
**

Mothusisatinfr
ontofhisTVthinki
ngofwhathad
happenedearli
eron,
justthi
nki
ngaboutitaroused
him.Lefasatbesi
dehim astheywatchedthe
foot
ballgame.
“
Ismom ev
ergoi
ngt
ocomeback?
”
Mot
husi
lookedathi
m.“
Who?
”
“
Isshegoingt
ocomeback?Imeanmamao
mongwe.”
Mothusi
sighed.“
Idon’
tknow.Wehav
eaf
ew
pr
oblems.”
“Can’ty
oufixtheproblems.Mygui danceand
counseli
ngteachersaidli
feisnotperfectmeani
ng
peoplearenotperfectandthatprobl
emsar eapart
ofli
fe.Can’
tyoujustdealwiththeproblem?Ireal
l
y
missher.It
’snotthesamewi thouther.”
“
It
’snott
hateasy
.”
“I
tis,youareonewhomakesi thardfornor
eason.
Youdon’ thavetobreakupwit
hsomeoneev er
yti
me
youhav eproblemslikey
oudidwithmama.Wealso
sufferwheny oubreakup,somaybeyoucanthi
nk
forthekidstoo.”
Mothusil
ookedatLef
a.“
Iknowt
haty
ouguy
sal
so
getaf
fect
edbutgrownups-
“
“Youdon’tknowbecauseifyouknewyouwould
neverputusthroughthat
.Iam r
eall
ysadandIf
eel
l
onely.I
thurtsknowingwearenevergoi
ngtobea
normalfamily
.”
Mot
husi
sighed.“
Iam sor
ryy
ouf
eel
thatway
.”
“Youcan’tapol
ogizei
fyoudon’
tmeanit
.Teacher
saidjustdon’
tdoitwhenyouknowi
t’
snotcoming
from yourhear
t.
”
“
Imeanit
.Iam sor
ry.Yourot
hermom andIhada
f
ewprobl
ems.Shedidsomethingt
hatreal
l
yhurt
me.
”
“
Can’
tyouf
orgi
veher
?Don’
tyoul
oveher
?”
“Il
oveherthat
’swhyitreal
lyhurts.Butyouarer
ight
,
sheisnotperf
ect.Iam nottoo.Iwil
lfi
xital
l.
”
Lef
asmi
l
edt
henhuggedhi
sfat
her
.
“
Ilov
eyou!
”
Mothusi
chuckl
edput
ti
nghi
sar
msar
oundhi
m.“
I
l
oveyoutoo.
”
Mot
husi
reachedf
orhi
sphonet
hent
ext
edNanao.

*
**

Miasati
nfrontofherbooksst
udyi
ngfortomorrow’
s
exam.Shewentthroughpasty
earexam paper
s
browsingthr oughwit
hherpenbet weenherl i
ps.She
openedherbookt henwentov eracoupl eofthi ngs
befor
ej ott
ingdowni nherrev i
sionbook.Thel ights
wentof f,
shef rownedatthedar knesst henst oodup
andwal kedout si
decheckingifelectri
citywasgone
buthernei ghborshadelectr
ici
ty.Shesi ghedwal king
backinsidet hehousereali
zi
ngt hattheirelectricit
y
wasfinished, f
oramomentshej uststoodt herewi th
noplan.
Kefi
lwewasoutwi t
hherboyfri
endsandther
ewasn’t
evenacoininthehouse.Sheopenedthecur
tains
thenpackedherbooksinherbagbeforewal
kingout
l
ockingbehindher
.
Sheknockedonhernei
ghbor
’sgate.Thegat
e
openedthenshewal
kedinasVict
orwalkedout
side.
“
Ohhi
…”
“Dumelang,uhourelect
ri
cityisfi
nishedandIhave
anexam tomor r
owmor ning,Iwaswonder i
nifIr
ead
here.Icansitonthever
anda, i
t’
sok.”
Hechuckl
ed.“
Tsena.(
Comei
n.)
”
Shef
oll
owedhi
minsi
det
hehouset
henhepoi
nted
att
hedini
ngtabl
e.“
Youcanst
udyt
her
e.Ther
eis
bet
terl
i
ghti
ng.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Shewal
kedov
ert
othet
abl
eashel
ookedather
.
“
Wheni
syourbi
rt
hday
?”
“
3Januar
y.”
Henoddedt hensatdown.Mi aopenedherbooks
andconti
nuedst udying,Vict
orstol
eglancesather
admiri
ngherbeaut y.Ofcausehewoul dn’tactonhis
feel
i
ngsbuthecoul djustadmirefr
om far.Shekept
herheaddownr eadingf oral
mostanhourt henshe
fi
nall
ypackedhert hingsgetti
ngup.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Letmebuyy
ouel
ect
ri
cit
y.”
“
It
’sok,
mamawi
l
lshout
.”
“
Didy
oueat
?”
“
Eer
ra.
”
“
Ok.Goshar
p.”
Shewal
kedoutwi
thherbooks,
Vict
orr
eachedf
or
hi
sphoneandcal
l
edhisfr
iend.
“
Vic.
.”
“
Ifeel
li
keapedophi
l
etl
hemonna.If
eel
sogui
l
tyon
t
opofit.
”
“
Whathappened?
”
“Therei
st hi
sgirl
,gomogatenggogontl
eblind!Iam
real
lytr
yingbutIam fai
li
ngandtothi
nkthatsheis
onlyakid,Iam di
sgustedatmysel
f.
”
“
Howol
disshe?
”
“
17.
”
“
Eish…”
“IknowbutIcan’tstopthi
nki
ngabouther.Sheis
quietorshy,gakesurebutsheisj
ust…shehasme
goingcrazy.Ever
ysingl
etimeIhav
etor emind
my sel
fthatsheisjustaki
d.”
“
Justwaitti
l
lsheis18ebeogokapa.Rightnowy ou
t
ryanyt
hing,youar
egoingt
ojai
l.Unl
essofcause
y
ouarereall
ycaref
ulbutmybestadvi
ceisjustwait
f
orher.
”
Aknockont
hedoori
nter
rupt
edhi
m.
“
Letmecal
lyouback.
”
“
Sur
elai
taka.
”
Vi
ctorwal
kedov
ert
othedoorandopenedf
orMi
a.
“
Ifor
gotmypen.
”
“
Comei
n.”
Shequi
ckl
ywal
kedt
othedi
ningt
abl
ethent
ookher
pen.
“
Aren’
tyouscar
edi
nthedar
kal
one?
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
NoIam f
ine.
”
Shewal
kedtothedoorbuthebl
ockedherway.“
E
kaeboy
fri
endy
agago?( Wherei
syourboyf
ri
end?)
”
Sheshy
lyl
ookeddown.“
Iam notdat
ing.
”
“
Hav
eyouev
erdat
ed?
”
Shef
eltheatr
isi
ngt
ohercheeks.“
Nyaar
ra.(
No.
)”
“
Ntebe…(
Lookatme.
)”
Shesl
owl
yrai
sedherheadl
ooki
ngathi
m.
“
Ist
her
esomeoney
oul
i
keatschool
?”
“
No.
”
“Ok.
”Hepul l
edhercloserandt i
lt
edherchi nt hen
l
eanedov erandgaveheraki ss.Mia’shear t
poundedsomuchasheFr enchkissedher ,hi
shand
onherback.Unsureofwhatt odo, shest oodst i
l
las
hekissedherevenharderthenher eleasedherl i
ps.
“
Keepi
tthatway
.”
Shenoddedt
henhesmi
l
edpi
nchi
nghercheek.
“
Youcango.
”
Shequicklywalkedoutthenl
ockedher
sel
finsi
det
he
house,herheartpoundi
ngsomuch.Sheputher
handinsideherpanti
esandfel
tthedampness.

*
**

Kennycl
osedRona’
sbagthenputi
tonthebed.He
walkedi
nminut
eslat
ert
henlookedather
.
“
Heybabe.
.”
“
Hey
,yourbagi
sready
.”
Hel eanedoverandkissedher .Kennyheldher
breathashekissedherev enhardercar
essingher
cheek.Ronagentlypushedhert ot hebedbr eathi
ng
heav i
lyashi
sdickgrewt hickandhar dinhispants.
Hel ai
dherdownandpul ledoutherpanties.He
openedherlegsstari
ngatherpussyt henpar tedher
fol
ds.Kennyclosedherl egs.
“
Babe,
youar
egoi
ngt
obel
ate.
”
Helookedatherpar
ti
ngherl
egs.“
Iwi
l
lbequi
ck.I
missyou.
”
“
Ronay
ouhav
etogo.
”
“Ican’
tgol
ikethis…Ineedy
ou.”Hepull
edhercloser
taki
ngouthisdickst
ari
ngatherpussy
,hishear
t
beati
ngsofast.
“
Ronay
ouwi
l
lmi
ssy
ourpl
ane.
”
“
Iwi
l
ltakeanot
heronet
omor
row.
”
Herubbedhi
sdi
ckonhersl
i
tasshet
ri
edt
ocl
ose
herl
egs.
“
Ronast
op!Kekopaot
samay
ehel
a.(
Cany
ou
pl
easej
ustgo.
)Youwon’
tdi
eify
oudon’
thav
esex.
”
Helookedather
.“Iam notgoi
ngwi
thouthav
ing
sex.
”
“Idon’
twanttohavesex.Kelapi
le.(Iam t
ired.
)You
thi
nkbeingpregnanti
seasy.Iam exhausted,ke
kopaot samaye.(
Pleasego.
)”
Ronalookedatherr
esi
sti
ngt
henathi
shar
d
thr
obbingdi
ck.Ther
ewasnowayhewasgoing
wit
houthavingt
hat
“
Getof
fme!
”
“
Whyar
eyoudoi
ngt
his?Whycan’
twehav
esex?
”
Tearsfi
ll
edhereyes.“
Ronacanyouj
ustgo.Wewil
l
havesexwheny oucomeback.Ri
ghtnowIreal
l
y
don’
tfeell
ikei
t.
”
“Ihavebeenunderst
andi
ngf
orawhi
l
enow.You
can’tbeser
ious.
”
“Iam sor
ry.Ther
rawenal
et’
sdoi
twheny
oucome
back.
”
Shet
ri
edtomoveawaybuthepul
ledherpushi
nghi
s
di
ckbet
weenherf
lapsandsi
nki
ngin.
“
Ronast
op!St
opi
t!
”
Hef
il
ledherupasshef
eltashar
ppai
nst
art
.
“
Ahhh!Youar
ehur
ti
ngme.St
op!Ronast
opi
t!
”
“St
opmaki
ngnoise,
Qisinthesit
ti
ngroom.Oseka
wabatl
agoper
fomelaKenny.Youarebegi
nni
ngto
annoyme.
”
“Youar er
apingme.Idon’
twanttohavesexwi t
hyou
can’tyousee?Youarehurt
ingme!Getoffme.I
don’twantyouanywherenearme,Ihat
ey ou.You
disgustme.Getoffme!AMBER!”Shescreamed.
“Getoffme!AMBER!”
Ronal
ookedather
.“Youwhat
?”
“Ihat
ey ou!Getoffme!I
fyoudon’tgetof
fmeIam
goingtoreportyoutot
hepoli
ce.AMBER!Qcall
Amber !
”
Helookedatherforawhi l
ethengotoffher
.He
walkedi
nsidethebathroom whi
leshebrokedown
cr
yingcoveri
ngherself
.
Moment slaterhewalkedoutofthebat
hroom t
hen
changedintohiscasualcl
otheswhil
eshecri
ed.
Amberknockedont
hedoor
.
Ronagr
abbedhi
sbagandopened.
“
UhQcal
l
edme.
”
“
Shei
sinsi
de.
”
Hewalkedpasthert
henwentt
othesi
tt
ingr
oom
andbumpedfist
swithhi
sson.
“
Iseey
out
omor
rowbuddy
.”
Qsmi
l
ed.“
Byedaddy
.”
Ronawal
kedoutpi
cki
nghi
sri
ngi
ngphonet
hengot
i
nhiscar
.
“
Yes?
”
“Goodeveni
ngsi
r,Iam alreadyatt
heair
port
,our
planel
eavesi
n20mi nutes,shoul
dIcancel
?”
“
No,
Iam comi
ng.
”
.
.
Li
keandcommentassoonasy
our
eadsowecan
haveourot
herbonuses
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#75

Ronapar kedattheai
rpor
tthenhur
riedi
nsi
de
carr
yinghisbag.Yaonewhowasst andi
ngi
nsi
det he
ai
rportlooki
ngattheentr
ancesmil
edandwav ed.
Ronawal kedover.
“
Hey
…sor
ryf
ort
hedel
ay.
”
“
It
’sok,
let
’sgo.
”

*
**

Minuteslat
ertheygotintheirpl
aneandsatdown.
Yaonesatdownbesi dehi
ml ett
inghersweet
cologneengulfhim.Herdr esspull
edbackrev
eali
ng
heryell
owthighst hensheputhertabl
etonherlap
ty
pingsomet hing.Ronatookadeepbr eat
hputti
ng
hi
shandi nhispocket.
“
Didy
ouf
indal
odge?
”
Shenoddedtucki
ngherhairbehi
ndhereartappi
ng
hert
ablet
.“Yessi
rthoughIwasalreadygi
vi
ngup.”
Ronasighedleaningbackonhissit
, secondslat
er
theyputontheirseat
belt
sandswi t
chedof fthei
r
gadgets.Yaoneheldherbreat
hast heplanetookoff
,
hereyesclosed.Ronalookedather.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
Shenoddedsil
ent
ly,mi
nuteslat
ershefi
nal
l
ysi
ghed
rel
axi
ng.Ronaworr
iedl
ylookedather
.
“
Arey
ougood?
”
“
Yessi
r.Justscar
edoff
lyi
ng.
”
“
Arey
ouser
ious?
”
Shenodded.“Yes.Ihat
efl
yi
ng.Myfi
rstt
imef
lyi
ng
l
eftahorr
ibl
et ast
einmymouth.”
“
Whathappened?
”
Shesmi l
ed.“Thepl
aneranoutoffuel
andalot
happened,Isawmyl i
fefl
ashi
ngbefor
emyey es.I
wasgoingt oCypr
usforschool
,fr
om ther
eonIjust
hatefl
yi
ng.Ihavefl
ashbacksofthattr
ip.
”
“Youshouldhav
etol
dmer etser
ebase.Akerewena
oruralny
anatwoseconds.Youar
ejustl
ighti
n
complexi
onmmeor ural
.”
Shel
aughed.“
Pleasedon’
tsayt
hat
.”
“Butonaser
iousnot
e,hav
eyouev
erconsi
der
ed
counsel
i
ng?”
“
Yeah.Ihav
ebeent
hinki
ngabouti
tlat
ely
.”
“
Youshoul
dbecausey
ouar
egoi
ngt
obef
lyi
nga
l
ot.
”
“
Iwi
l
ldef
ini
tel
yseesomeone.
”

*
**

Tshenolocl
osedt hedoorasthepol
iceoff
icer
s
walkedoutthenlookedattheki
dswhower eabit
shaken.ShelookedatKgosiashepickedbothhi
s
ki
dsupandsatdownont hecouch.
“
Youshoul
dn’
tbescar
ed.
”
Andr
eal
ookedatherf
atherwor
ri
edl
y.“
Didwedo
somet
hingwr
ong?
”
“No.Thepoli
ceoffi
cersarejustdoingthei
rjob.
Somet i
mestheyreall
yhavenothingtodot han
searchourhousestoseeifwear ehidi
ngany thi
ng
butwear enotsotheywil
lgoaheadandkeep
searchi
ngotherhouses.I
t’
stheirjob.
”
Andreasmil
ed.“
Sowear
enotgoi
ngt
oget
ar
rested?
”
Kgosi
chuckl
ed.“
Noonei
sget
ti
ngar
rest
ed.
”
Thekidsrel
axedasheconti
nuedt alki
ngtothem.
Tshenol
owal kedt
oherbedroom andsatont hebed
unabl
etoshakeoffherf
ear.Kgosi walkedi
na
minutel
ater
.
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Not
hing.
”
“Youcan’
tjustsaynot
hingwhenobviously
somethi
ngisgoingon.Whataretheylooki
ngf
or?
”
Helookedatherthencr
ouchedbef
oreher
.“Theyar
e
j
ustnosybabe.”
“
It
’sdif
fer
ent
.Theyar
elooki
ngf
orsomet
hing.What
i
sgoingonKgosi?
”
“
Idon’
twanty
out
owor
ryov
ernot
hing.
”
Tearsfi
lledhereyes.“
Cany oust
oplyi
ngt
ome.
Pleasetellmethetrut
h.Areyougoi
ngtoj
ail
?You
can’tl
eav etheki
dsandI.”
Kgosismil
edt henki
ssedher.“
Noonei sl
eavi
ng.I
l
ovey ouandtrustme,theyar
ejustbeingnosy.Iam
sorr
ytheyactuall
yhadtocomeher e,i
twon’tever
happenagain.
”
Shelookedathi
mf orawhil
eunabl
etor
eadhim.He
smil
edthenlayheronthebedget
ti
ngontopofher
ki
ssi
ngher .
“
Whydi
dyoupani
cwhenIcal
l
edy
ou?
”
Hekissedherneck.“BecauseIsworetomy sel
fthat
suchwill
neverhappen,seeingi
thappenjustpissed
meof f
.Iwil
lneverhappenagain.Sor
rybabe..”
Hetookoffherdr
essandfli
ppedherpul l
i
ngher
pant
iest
ot hesi
de.Hedroppedhisdickonherass
asshesl
ightl
yrai
sedherass.Kgosibreathedonher
neckpushi
nghi
sdi
cki
nsi
det
hen….

*
**

Bofel
owalkedinsi
dehermother
’shousethat
eveni
ngexhaustedfr
om t
helongdri
ve.Sapphi
re
whowasi nthekit
chenwashi
ngdishesranoverand
huggedhermotherti
ght
ly.
“
Mama!
”
“
Heybaby
…”
“
Arey
ouher
etot
akeushome?
”
“
No.Icamet
oseey
ou.
”
“Wewanttogowithy
ou.Idon’
twantt
ost
aywi
th
grannyany
more.
”
Di
amondhuggedherl
eg.“
Met
oo.Iwantt
ogohome.
Gr
annybeat
sus.”
Bofelo’
smot herwal
kedinandshookherhead.“I
can’tbel
ieveyounevertr
ainedSapphi
ret
odohouse
chores.Kidsheragealr
eadyknowt odoafewthi
ngs.
Kanayanongitl
ooksl
i
keIam abusi
ngherwhenI
am t
eachinghersi
mpl
ethi
ngs.
”
Bof
elosi
ghed.“
Goandwat
chTVguy
s.”
Bofel
osighedstar
ingathermot
herasherki
dssat
onthefl
oorwatchingTV.Shel
ookedathermot
her
andswallowedsadly
.
“
Canwet
alki
nthebedr
oom?
”
Theywalkedt
ohermother
’sbedr
oom t
henBof
elo
satbesi
dehermot
her
.
“
Ihavedeci
dedt
otakemykidsandstaywit
hthem.I
f
oundaplacebi
genought
ostaywit
ht hem.
”
“
Itol
dyou,
Icanst
aywi
tht
hem.
”
“No.Koor
emamaIjustdon’
twantyoutorai
semy
kidst
hewayyour
aisedus.Theyar
esit
ti
ngonthe
fl
oor.
”
“
Thei
rfeetar
edust
y.”
“
It
’scol
dont
hef
loor
.Theycoul
dgoandwasht
hei
r
f
eet.
”
“
Arey
ousay
ingIam nott
aki
ngcar
eofy
ourki
ds
pr
oper
ly?
”
“That’
snotit
.Iam j
ust…”Shesighedtearf
ull
ythen
closedhereyesf
ight
inghertearsbutatearran
downhercheek.
“Whydidn’
tyouev
ert
ell
meaboutt
heot
herchi
l
d
papahas?”
“
What
?”
“
Theotherchi
ldpapahas.Isawher.Ispoketothe
l
awyer,
Iwantedtoaskhim somethi
ngandguess
whatheaskedmef i
rst
…ifIhavecommuni cat
ed
wi
thmysister
.”
“Thatchi
ldisnoty
ourf
ather
’sandnnaIwi
l
lnev
er
accepther!
”
“Howdoy ounotacceptherwhensheismyfather
’s
chil
d?”Shetookoutherphoneandshowedherthe
pict
ure.“
Shelooksl
ikepapa.Howcouldyoukeep
suchasecret?”
“Yourfatheristheonewhokeptthesesecr
ets.I
don’thaveachi l
doutther
e!”Hermothersi
ghed
standing.“Iam nott
heonewhowascheat i
ng.Iwil
l
neveracceptt
hatgi
rlbecausesheisaresul
tof
adult
ery.Ther
esul
tofy ourf
ather
’si
nfi
deli
ty.
”
Bofel
oswal l
owedt
henstoodupandwal kedtothe
room herchi
ldr
enwasusingandstar
tedpacki
ng
thei
rthi
ngs.Hermotherwal
kedinandlookedather
asshepacked.
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ngatt
hist
imeoft
heni
ght
.”
“
Iam l
eav
ingwi
thmyki
ds.
”
“
All
becauseoft
hatst
raychi
l
d?”
“
Thatst
raychi
l
dismysi
ster
.”
Bofel
ofi
nishedpacki
ngt
henwal
kedoutwi
tht
he
bags.
“
Guy
slet
’sgo.
”
Thekidsqui
ckl
yfol
lowedthei
rmotherout
side.
Bofel
oputever
ythi
nginthebootashermother
l
ookedather.
“
Bof
elo,
it’
slat
e.Pl
easesl
eepand-
“
“
Goodby
e.”
Bof
elogoti
nhercart
henr
ever
sedoutoft
hey
ard
anddr
oveof
f.

*
**

Kennywal kedfrom herbedroom inhercomf ortabl

e
clothesandgotsomesnacksf r
om thekitchen
bef or
elayingont hecouch.Sher eachedfort he
remot eandchangedt hechannel.Sheputona
mov i
ethatwasj uststart
ingthengotcomf ortable
eat i
ng.Thoughtfull
yshel ookedatherphone
thinkingtocallRonaf eel
ingguil
ty.Shereachedf ori
t
thencal l
edhim buthisnumberwasunav ailable.
Wi thasighsheputherphonedownandcont i
nued
eat i
ngwat chi
ngt hemov i
eenj oyi
ngthepeaceand
quietness.

*
**

InKasane,Ronawalkedinhi
sroom andl
aydown
closi
nghiseyes.Kenny
’swordspl
ayedoverandov
er
i
nhisheadt henhegotupandwenti nt hebat
hroom.
Forthefi
rstti
meheact uall
ywonderedifmaybeit
hadbeenami staket
ogetbackt ogether
i
mmedi atel
yaf t
ershewal kedoutpri
son.Maybehe
shouldhavegivenherthespacesheneeded.They
hadneverreall
ywentf orcounsel
ing.
Hest oodundert hecoldwat erforawhi l
elostinhi s
thoughtst henf inall
ywal kedout .Hedr essedupand
openedhi slapt opgoi ngt hroughi mpor tantemai l
s.
Afterafewmi nut esofgoi ngthroughhi semails,he
grabbedt hewi nehehadboughtonhi swayt here
andst ar
teddr inki nghopinghewoul dfor get
somehow.Her eachedf orhi sphonemoment slater
andswi t
chedi tonexpect ingt of i
ndanapol ogybut
therewasnot hing.I twasn’ tsurprisi
ng.Hecal led
Maat l
a.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Kennyhat
esme.
”
“
Shewhat
?”
“
Shehatesme.Isuspect
edi
tbutt
odayshef
inal
l
y
j
ustsai
dit
.”
“
Idon’
tthi
nkshemeanti
t,shei
sjustpr
egnant
.”
“No.It
’sfarmuchdeepert
hanthat
.Iknowa
pregnantwomancangetannoyedbutthisi
s
somet hi
ngtot
all
ydi
ffer
ent
.Isawitinherey
es.She
hatesme. ”
“
Kennyl
ovesy
ou.
”
“Shedid,Iguessonceshedi dbutnowIdoubti t
.I
feelIpr
essuredherintoget ti
ngbackwi thmewhen
shedidn’
twantt o.Shei slit
er al
l
ybreakingmyheart
becauseIwoul dgiveany thingforher.Itr
ybyall
meanst odoev eryt
hingf orherbutit’
snev ergood
enough.Sheal waysfindsr easontobeangr yatme.”
“
Arey
oudr
unk?
”
“OfcauseIam.Iam st
ressed,
cany oubeli
eveshe
sai
dshewi l
lrepor
tmeforrapeifIhavesexwith
her?
”
“Esiwasn’
tli
kethatwhenshewaspr
egnant
.Ev
en
Bofelowasn’
tbutIheardwomendi
ff
er.
”
“Iknowbutt
hisi
sbeyondhor
mones.I
t’
ssomet
hing
else.Wear
enotevenhavi
ngsex.
”
“
Forhowl
ong?
”
“Twoweeks.Thenontopofthatshesl
eepsnaked
sometimesandIam notsupposedt
otouchher.The
othert
imeshewipedherli
ps.”
Maatlachuckl
ed.“
Idon’tknowwhattosaybecauseI
am notanexpectatt
heset hi
ngsbutIam sur
eaft
er
shegivesbir
thshewil
lbef i
ne.
”
Someoneknockedsoft
lyonhi
sdoor.Hepickedhis
bot
tl
eandwalkedtothedoorhol
dingthephone.
Yaonesmil
ed.“Iam sorrybutIwantedust
ogo
thr
oughsomethingIjustrecei
vedfr
om Mr.Ej
i
m’s
PA.”
Ronalookedather,shewasnowi nawhi tesi
lky
gownwear ingfl
i
pflops,hehadnev erseenheri
n
fl
atshoesbutshest i
l
llookedsexyasfuck.Hiseyes
downhercur v
ybodyt oheryel
lowlegs.Heopened
thedoorforherl
ett
ingherin.
“
Wewi
l
ltal
k.”
“Shar
p.Justhol
dont
il
lshegi
vesbi
rt
htheni
twi
l
lbe
over.
”
“
Yeahsur
e.”
Yaonel ookedatt hebott
leinhishandsashel ooked
atheronl ywearinghissweatpants.Hereyeswent
downandt odayshecoul dreall
yseeit.Shehad
alway sknownhewasonesexymanbutact uall
y
seeinghi m shirt
lesswasmor ethanprooftoconfi
rm
herdirtyt houghts.Shetookast epback,herhai
r
foll
owi ngt ohershoulderswonder i
ngjusthowhe
woul df uckher.
Hewoul dprobablyf
uckherhardandgood,l
eaveher
dri
ppingwithhiscum.Sheclear
edherthr
oatpul
li
ng
hersel
ftogether
.
“
Ist
histheri
ght
ful
timeorweshoul
dgoov
eri
tint
he
mor
ning?”
Ronal
ookedi
nherey
esasshest
oodbef
orehi
m.
“
Hav
eyouev
ert
ri
edmodel
i
ng?
”
Yaonesmi
l
ed.“
No.
”
Hetookasi
pofhiswineadmiri
ngherbody
.“You
shoul
dtr
yit
.Youaresexyenoughf
orit.
”
Br
avel
y,Yaonewal
kedov
ert
ohi
mthent
ookt
he
bot
tl
eofwi
neandseti
tasi
de.
“Youaredrunk.It
hinkyoushoul
dsleep.Tomorr
ow’s
meet i
ngisi
mpor t
ant,wecan’
taff
ordtohaveyounot
givi
ngthem yourbest
.Iam goi
ngtocomeher eearl
y
mor ni
ngsowecangot hr
oughacoupleofthi
ngs.”
“
Iam notdr
unk.
”
“
Yesy
ouar
e.”
“
Ongangi
sanal
ennaYaone?
”
“
No.Iam t
ell
i
ngy
ou.Pl
easesl
eep.Di
dyoubat
h?”
Ronagrabbedherbywai standpull
edherclosert
o
him.Thei
rbodiesrubbedagainstoneanotheras
theyl
ookedateachot herwithnot
hingbutlust
.
Yaonecouldfeelhi
sdickrightonherst
omachasi t
j
erked.
“
Iwantt
ofucky
ousohar
dti
l
lyoucan’
twal
k.”
Yaonebreat
hedheav
il
yst
ari
ngathi
m,herni
ppl
es
hardeni
ng.
“
Leav
emyr
oom bef
oreIdosomet
hing.
”
Hel
ethergoandl
ayonhi
sbedcl
osi
nghi
sey
es.
Yaonel
ookedathi
sbul
get
hent
ookof
fhergown.
“
Idon’
twantt
ogo.Iwanty
out
ofuckme.
”
.
.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#76

Ronalookedatherasshetookof
fhergown
remaini
ngwithherg-
str
ing,
herbr
eastpoi
nti
ngat
him.Shewalkedovert
hensatonhim.
“
Idon’
twantt
ogo.Fuckme.
”
Ronaswal
lowedstar
ingatherbr
easts,
shemov
ed
herwai
stonhimfeel
inghi
sdickbeneath.
“
Youneedt
ogo.
”
Shesmi l
edthengotof fhi m andtookouthi sdick
thenbitherl
owerl i
pstaringati t
.Hel ookedinher
eyesthenwentt oherki ssableli
ps.Yaonesl owly
massagedhi sdi ckstar
ingatal ltheveinssticking
outashel ai
dt herehelpless.Sheopenedhermout h
andsuckedt het ipli
keal olli
pop.Hegr untedasshe
workedhim wi t
hhermout h,gaggingoni tand
massaginghi sbal l
s.Hel ookedatherasshe
conti
nuedmov ingherheadgi vi
nghi m aheadand
j
ustashebegunpumpi ngi ntoher,hi
sgr untsgetti
ng
abitl
oud,shepul
ledawayandsatonhi m pul
li
ngher
panti
estothesi
deandlethimfeelherwetnessas
shemovedherwai stmoani
ngsoft
ly.
“
Fuck!
”
Yaonebitherlowerl
ipl
ett
inginthet
ipi
n,Ronaput
hi
shandsonherwai st,
unabletothi
nkanymoret
hen
pushedherdownonhi sdi
ck.Shegaspedasher
pussyst
retchedtoit
’sl
imi
t.
Ronagr
untedincomplet
epleasure.Hisphone
st
art
edri
nging,Yaonel
ookedatitthengotoffhi
m.
“
Picki
t.
”
“
Don’
tdot
his…”
Shel
ookedi
nhisbeggi
ngeyest
henpickedhergown
st
ari
ngathi
m wi
thanaught
ysmile.
“
Iam sor
ry.Youar
eri
ght
,Ineedt
ogo.Seey
ou
t
omorrowMr .Mot
samai
.”
Shewalkedoutleav i
nghi m breat
hingheavil
y,hi
s
di
cksti
llhar
dandt hr
obbi ng,hewasev eninpain.He
str
okedhisowndi ckt henpaused, i
tdidn’
tevenfeel
hal
fasnicethanhav ingthatpussycl enchi
nghim.
FuckYaone!Het
hought
ful
l
ytookhi
sphonecal
l
ing
Kenny.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Heybabe…”
“
Hey
…”
“Babedoy outhi
nkwhatyouar
edoi
ngisfai
r?Idon’t
know, can’
tyouj
ustf
orgi
vemeforwhat
everthatI
did?”
“
RonaIam t
ir
ed.
”
“Kanayouar
enotbeingf
aironme.Iam r
eal
l
ytr
ying
butyoudon’
tseei
t.
”
“
Canwet
alkabouti
ttomor
row?Iam f
eel
i
ngsl
eepy
.”
“
Wai
t…whatar
eyouwear
ing?CanIv
ideocal
lyou?
”
“AhhRonannar
rakebat
agor obal
a.(
Iwantt
o
sleep.
)Canwet
alkt
omorrow?
”
“Ir
eal
l
yneedyou.Youdon’
thavet
odoany
thi
ng.You
canevenmut
eme.That’sok.
”
“Ronayoucan’
tpossi
blyt
ell
mey ouar
edyingjust
becausewehaven’
thadsexinj
usttwoweeks.You
ar
etheonewhosaidyouwaitedformef
or5y
ear
s.
Whycan’
tyouj
usthol
dy our
self
?”
“
ImeantInevergoti
nanyrel
ati
onshi
pforthepast
f
ivey
earsbecauseIknewIwaswaiti
ngforyou!
”
“Whatisthatsupposedt omean?Youweresleeping
around?Youjustcan’tkeepi
tinyourpant
s,i
t’
slike
theysai
dy ouaregoingtodieify
oudon’thav
esex. ”
”
Hesi
ghed.“
Ok,
wewi
l
ltal
ktomor
row.
”
“Nnar r
aIdon’ tthinkIcanmanagewi thyourl ovefor
sex.Thispr egnancyi sreallyweighi ngdownonme.
Youdon’ tseem t obeunder standingwher eIam
comi ngfrom, y ouar esel f
ishandy ouonl ycar e
abouty ourownneeds.NowIam ev enwor r
iedthat
onedayy ouar egoi ngt orapeme.Iknowy ouar e
onlylookingf oranex cuset ocheat , goahead.Thi s
ti
mear oundf orgetmef i
ghtingyou.Iam j ustgoing
toleavey ou.Youmustt hi
nkIam af ooltot akey ou
backev enaf terev erythingmmet hi stimeIam j ust
goingtowal kaway .Youar eaddictedt osex, sexi s
goingtobey ourdownf all
.Doy oual way shav etobe
havingsexl ikeat eenagerwhohasj ustl
eanthowt o
hav
esex?
”
“Doyouhavetothreat
enmewi thl
eavingever
y
singl
etime?Can’twejust
…”Heclosedhiseyeswi
th
asigh.“
Ihear
dyou.Goshar pKenei
lwe.Sl
eep.”
Shehungup.Hel ookedathisdickthenwentonline
wherehesearchedforsomepor ntot akeoffhi
s
edgetobutnothi
ngwaswor ki
ng.Hecl osedhiseyes
i
maginingYaone’spussyaroundhisdi ck,
yeah…that
seemedtodoi t
.

*
**

Thef ol
l
owingmorning,Ronaputonhiswatch
stari
ngathimsel
font hemirr
ori
nhissuit
.Hesmiled
fi
xinghiswatchthengrabbedhisphoneandsent
Kennyamessage.
Rona:Heybabe,Ir
eall
yappreciateallt
heefforty
ou
putint
omakingmel ookgood,Ilovethesuityou
packedforme,Iwouldhavenev erchosenitonmy
own.Ialsol
ovethewatch,Iknowy out aketi
me
putt
ingeveryt
hingtogetherf orme.IloveyouandI
am sorr
yy oufeelIam nottryingtounderst
andyou.I
promiseIwill
dobet ter
,justwi shy
ouwoul dmeet
mehal f
waybutIguessi t’sthehormones.Ilov
ey ou
somuch, haveagr eatday.
Hesl idhisphonei
shispocketsprayedabi tof
fragrancethenYaoneknockedandwal kedin.Rona
turnedtoherandlookedatherasshewal kedfur
ther
i
nhol di
nghertabl
eti
nablacksuit.Shefixedher
blazerasherheelsmadehertall
.
“
Mor ningMr .Motsamai,
Mr .Eji
m’sPAsentmethi
s
l
astnight.Weshoul dgothroughitsotopr
epar
eyou
f
orthemeet i
ng.Ihaveorderedyourbr
eakf
astf
orm
arestaurantnearbyandit
’sonitsway.
”
Ronalookedathersur
pri
sed,i
twasasifl
astni
ght
neverhappenedasshewentonfil
l
inghi
m onwhat
hehadt oknow.Momentslat
ershesmil
ed.
“
That
’sal
l
.”
“
Thanks.
”
“
Justdoi
ngmyjob,
todayMsLaol
anggetsher
f
lower
s,si
ncesher
ecei
vedsomeyest
erday
,what
shouldIgethert
oday?Iwasthi
nkingmay bea
voucheratabeautyspa,
youhaven’tgot
tenthatf
or
herinawhile.
”
Henodded.“
Yeah,
thatwi
l
ldo.
”
“
Wouldyoul
ikemetoaccompanythegi
ftv
oucher
wi
thanymessageorsomet
hingsweett
oeat?
”
“
Uhany
thi
ngi
sfi
ne.
”
“
Yessi
r,y
ourbr
eakf
asti
sher
e.”
Sheopenedthedoorast
her est
aur
antst
affwal
ked
wit
hhisbreakf
astt
henwalkedout.
“
Didy
oueat
?”
“
No,
Iwi
l
leatl
ater
.”
“
Sitdownandeat
.”
“
Ionl
yor
der
edwhat
’senoughf
oroneper
son.
”
Hel
ookedi
nherey
es.“
Sit
.”
Yaoneputdownhert abl
ett
hensatdown.Hel
ooked
atherassheatethenhechuckl
edsippi
nghi
scoff
ee.
Yaonelookedathi
m wi t
hasmil
e.
“
Isev
ery
thi
ngok?
”
“
Yeah.
”
Shelookedathi mt hengottheappleget ti
ngupand
gotclosert
ohi ml ooki
nginhisey esthenhet r
aced
hisdickwit
hherf ingerandsmi l
edwat chingit
respondtohert ouch.Fuck,havingthatpowerover
suchamanf eltsogood, matteroffact,
rightt
hat
momentshef eltl
ikeshecoulddoany t
hing.
Sheunzi
ppedhi
spant
sthenhehel
dherhandwi
tha
smil
e.
“
Iwi
l
lfi
rey
ou.
”
“
Youar
etense,
rianakegot
huse.Iam j
ustdoi
ngmy
j
ob.
”
Sheknel tdownbef or ehimi nherbl acksuitl ooking
l
ikeapower f
ulwoman, shet uckedhercur ledhai r
behindhereart hent ookouthi sdickandst ar ted
suckingit,thistimear oundgi vi
ngitallheral l.Itwent
foracoupl eofmi nutest i
llhest ar
tedgr unting
thrusti
ngf rom beneat h.Heshothi sloadatt heback
ofhert hroatgroani ng.Itfeltsogoodl isteningt ohim
ashel ostcont r
ol releasingl oadsofcum i nher
mouth.Sheswallowedi tall
thencleaneduphisdick
bef
orepacki
ngiti nhispantsandcl osi
nghiszipper
.
Shefi
xedhisbeltthenst ooduplookingathim
i
nnocentl
yli
kethei nnocentPAshewas.
“
TheNi
ger
iansar
ewai
ti
ng,
weshoul
dgo.
”
Shet ur
nedandwalkedoutthenheclosedhiseyes
feel
ingmuchbetter
.Hechuckledalone,hehad
neededt hat
.Hegotupandlookedathimselfonthe
mirr
orbef or
ewalki
ngoutfol
lowinghertotherent
al
car.

*
**

Thatsamemor ni
ng,thepoli
cecart oget herwiththe
ambulancesurroundedt heblackAv ensisthatwasin
themiddleoftheroadwi ththebonnett hrashed.A
deadbulllayontheotherside.Thepol iceof f
icer
s
openedthecardoor sthenlookedatt hewomanon
thedri
ver’
sseat,herfaceont hesteeringwheel .The
paramedicswalkedov erandf el
tforherpul se.
“
Pul
sei
sweak,
let
’sgetheront
hest
ret
cher
!”
Theytookoffherseatthenpulledheroutoft hecar.
Atthebackseatt
heywer etwoki ds.Theother
paramedi
cputhishandsont heotherchi
ld’sneck
andshookhisheadsadl y.Hefeltthepul
sef orthe
othert
henlookedathiscolleague.
“
Onedeadandt
heot
heri
sst
il
lal
i
ve.
”
Oneoft hepoli
ceoff
icer
slookedatt
hehor
ri
fi
c
scene,thecarwasbadlydamagedhewaseven
surpr
isedtheywerepeopleal
ive.
“
Eish…”
Hisco-wor
kershookhi
shead.“
Thi
smusthav
e
happenedatni
ght.
”
Theytookthehandbagt
henopenedi
tandt
ookout
theI
denti
tycard.
“
What
’shername?
”
“
Bof
elo.
”

*
Minuteslatert heambul ancetookoffwhi lea
paramedi cwor kedont hemot herwhoseemedt o
havelostherpul se,helookedatherdoi ngchest
compr essions, hewasn’ tabouttowitnessanot her
humandi et houghheknewwhatwasgoi ngto
happenasi teachmi nutewentby .Hef eltsor
ryfor
thekidwhowasst i
l
l al
iveashecont inuedwi t
ht he
chestcompr essions.

*
**

Mot
husidroppedoffhi
ssonathi
sschool
then
i
mmediatel
ydroveawaycal
li
ngNanao.
“
Hey
…”
“Ispoketoapast
orwhoof f
erscounsel
i
ngandhe
willseeust
odayat5.Shoul
dIpickyouupfr
om y
our
house? ”
“
Yes.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Iam happywear
emov
ingahead.
”
“Yeah,Ir
eal
i
zedt
hatIam al
sohur
ti
ngmysonwi
th
allt
hese.
”
Nanaosi
ghed.“
Iam sor
ry.I
t’
sal
lmyf
aul
t.
”
“
Iam gl
ady
ouknow.
”
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Yah,
wewi
l
ltal
klat
er.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hehungupdriv
ingtowor
k.Hewal
kedinsi
det
he
pr
emisesansweri
nghi
sri
ngi
ngphone,
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Mot
husi
,Ineedy
ourhel
p.”
Mot
husi
frownedl
i
steni
ngt
oMar
k’sv
oice.“
Mar
k?”
“Ineedyoutodoadel i
veryforme.Iknowyouar eno
l
ongerwor ki
ngformebuty ouaretheonlypersonI
real
lytr
usttopul
lthi
soff.YougetP150Kcutf rom
thi
sdeal.P150Kforyoutoputinyourpocket.What
doy ousay?Goodofferri
ght?”
“
Whatam Idel
i
ver
ing?
”
“Acoupl
eofthings,y
ouaretaki
ngt hem t
oDurban.
YouaretheonlyguyIknowwill
doanexcel l
entj
ob.
Whatdoy ousay?Agoodbyejob.”
“
Ihav
eki
dsMar
k.”
“Iknow.That
’swhyIdeci
dedtoput50Kont opofit
.
Youwalkawaywi t
hP200KMot husi
.Youwalkout
ri
ch.Whatdoy ousay
?Deli
verthepackage,
getyour
moneyandgobackt oyourl
if
e.Youwi l
lnev
erhear
from meagai
n.”
.
.
.
Goodni
ght
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#77

Tshenol
osatinheroff
icelat
erthatdayst
ari
ngi
nto
nothi
ng.Shest
il
lcoul
dn’tshakeoffthef
eel
ingt
hat
somethingwaswrong.Shetookherphoneand
cal
ledhim.
“
Heybabe…”
“
Arey
oual
readyi
nGabor
one?
”
“
Yeah,
arey
ouok?
”
Feel
i
ngdownshesi ghed.“Idon’
tknow,Ijustfeel
down.If
eelyouarenottell
ingmesomet hing.Iam
worr
iedbecausewhateveriti
sit
’sbi
g.”
“
Youar
ewor
ryi
ngov
ernot
hing.
”
“
Idon’
twantt
olosey
ouandIf
eel
li
keIam goi
ngt
o.”
“Noonei sl
osi
nganyone.Stopst
ressi
ng.Byt
heway
,
Iwasthinki
ngwhenIcomebackweal lgofora
vacat
ion.Maybehi
ttheisl
ands.
”
Tshenol
osl
owl
ysmi
l
ed.“
Thatwoul
dbeni
ce.When
l
astdi
dweev
engof
orav
acat
ion?
”
“It
hinkweneedi
t.Wher
edoy
out
hinkweshoul
d
go?”
Shesmi
l
edexci
tedl
y.“
Idon’
tknow,
may
beBal
i
.”
“
Ok,
notapr
obl
em.
”
“
Ther
rawenababeIneedanewcar
.”
“
Ok,
whi
chone?
”
“
Idon’
tknow…somet
hingl
i
ket
hel
atestAudi
TT.
”
Kgosi
laughed.“
Ok,
Iwi l
lseei
fwecangety
ou
somethi
ngli
kethel
atestAudiTT.
”
“
Thanky
ousomuch.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.Il
ovey
ousomuch.
”
“
Youar
ecomi
ngbackt
oni
ghtr
ight
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Ok.Seeyout
oni
ght
.Ihav
etogo.Iam at
tendi
nga
meet
ing.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shehungupf
eel
i
ngmuchbet
ter
.Shegr
abbeda
coupleofthi
ngsthenwalkedoutgoingtothe
boardroom wheret
hemeet i
ngwasgoi ngtotake
pl
ace.Shewal kedi
nthenfrownedstari
ngata
womanseat edonRona’slapkissi
nghim.The
womanqui ckl
ygotoffandsatont heothersi
de.
“
Shi
t!
”
Tshenol
ostoodst
il
lfr
ozentohi
sspotthenthedoor
openedandMr.Bat
showalkedi
n.Helookedather.
“
Mrs.Di
sang…”
“UhIthi
nkIam i
ntheot
herboar
droom,
nott
hisone.
Sorr
y.”
Hewal
kedt
ohi
ssi
t.“
Closet
hedoorbehi
ndy
ou.
”
Withweekj oi
nts,Tshenolowalkedoutthenseconds
l
aterthebeautifulwomani ntheblacksuitwalked
outputt
ingonhersungl asses.Kennywasbeaut if
ul
butthi
swomanwasanent i
renewst or
y,herlight
complexionmadeherev enmor ebeauti
ful.She
confi
dentlywalkedpastherthenNol owentaf terher
andgrabbedherar m.
“
Excuseme…”
Shetur
nedandlookedatherwi
thasl
i
ghtsmi
l
eof
conf
usion.“
Hi…”
“
Whoar
eyout
oRona?
”
“
What
?”
“
Youhear
dme,
hei
sget
ti
ngmar
ri
ed!
”
Thewomansmi
l
ed.“
Doy
ouknowme?
”
“
Yes,
Iknowy
ouar
eabi
tch.That
’ssomeone’
sman.
”
“Idon’
tthi
nkyouandIshouldbehav
ingt
his
conver
sati
on.Havealovel
yday.
”
Sheturnedandwalkedaway .Mrs.Batshowalked
overalsotur
ningt
olookatt hewomanwhohad
beensitt
ingonRona’slap.SheturnedtoTshenol
o
whot ookadeepbreathinti
midatedbyherboss’s
wife.
“
Hi.
.”
Tshenol
ocl
ear
edhert
hroat
.“Mr
s.B…”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Wher
eishe?
”
“
Hej
ustgoti
nameet
ingIt
hink,
Idon’
tknow.
”
“
Wher
e?”
“There.
”Shepoi
ntedt
henshewal
kedawaywi
tha
smile.
Tshenol
osi
ghedt
henwal
kedaway
.

*
**

Awhilelat
erRonawal kedoutofthemeeti
ngtaki
ng
outhisphonethencalledKennywonder
ingif
Tshenolohadtoldheralready
,hi
spal
mssweat i
ng.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Heybabe…howar
eyouf
eel
i
ngt
oday
?”
“
Iam f
ine.
”
“Iam goi
ngt
omeetwi
thmyl
astcl
i
entt
henIwi
l
lbe
onmywaybackhome.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Doy
ouwantmet
obr
ingy
ouany
thi
ng?
”
“
No,
Iam f
ine.
”
“
Arey
ousur
eyouar
eok?
”
“
Iam f
ine.
”
“
Ok,
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Iwantt
omov
ebackt
oShakawe.
”
“
What
?”
“Iwantt
omov ebackt
oShakawe.WhenIam al
most
givi
ngbi
rtht
henIwil
lgot
oMmagweTumo’ s
house.
”
“Why?I
sthi
sbecauseofwhathappenedy
est
erday
?
Isai
dIwassor
ry.
”
“Idon’tt
hinkIcankeepl
iv
ingwit
hyouwhenyou
don’tunderst
andwhatIam goi
ngthr
ough.
”
“
Howwill
Iunderstandwhaty
ouaregoi
ngt
hrough
wheny
oudon’texplai
nitt
ome!”
“
Iam goi
ng.Youwi
l
lremai
nwi
thQ.
”
“Ican’tbel
iev
ey ouaredoingthi
s.Iam r
eall
ytry
ing
tofigureoutwhatIcandot omakei tal
lbet
terbut
youkeepf i
ndingeveryreasontopullmedownand
pushmeaway .WhatshouldIdo?”
“Youarecontrol
li
ng,i
t’
salwaysy
ourwayornoother
wayRona.Youar eself
ishandIt
hinki
t’
sbesti
fwe
giveeachotherspace.
”
Shedroppedt
hecal
lthenhecalledherbackbutshe
di
dn’
tpick.Hi
shear
twasbr eaki
ng.Hecall
edher
agai
ngetti
ngint
heelevat
or.
“
Iam atwor
k.”
“Iwi
llgobackt
omyhouse.Youdon’thavet
ogoto
Shakawebabe.Pl
ease…y
ouarebreakingmyhear
t.
”
“
Iam st
il
lgoi
ng.
”
“
Whatshoul
dIdo?
”
“
Letmegobat
hongah.
”
Hesteppedoutoft
heelev
atorasKennydroppedthe
cal
lthenwal
kedtohiscar
.Tshenol
orushedafter
hi
m.
“Ican’
tbeli
eveyouar
echeati
ngonKenny
.Af
ter
everyt
hingthi
sishowyourepayher
?”
“Youdon’
tknowwhat
’sgoi
ngandIam notcheat
ing
onKenny.
”
“
Isawy
ouandt
hatwoman.
”
“Iam notcheati
ngonKennybecauseIl oveher.I
wastelli
ngthatwomant ogetoffme.Iwouldnev er
evenkissher.I
fyougoandt el
lKennysucht hi
ngs
youaregoingtostressherunnecessar
il
yandshe
mightendupl osi
ngthebaby.Don’tbethatper
son.”
Hegotinhi
scaranddr
oveawaypi
cki
nghi
sri
ngi
ng
phone.
“
Yah?
”
“
Iam doner
evi
ewi
ngt
hehot
el.Shoul
dIcomeback
t
her
e?”
“
No,
Iam al
sodoneher
e.Let
’sgo.
”
“
Ther
eisapl
aceIwant
edt
osee.
”
“Wear
egoingbackr
ightnow.Wher
ear
eyou?Iwi
l
l
comeandpicky
ouup.”

*
**

Yaonewai
tedatt
hemal
lforRonat
appi
ngherphone
whi
l
ecarryi
ngherhandbag.Shesmiledasherphone
r
angthenshepi
ckedhersister
’scal
l
.
“
Heel
awar
eyouwhatwi
thy
ourboss?
”
Shel
aughed.“
Mma,
Ifeel
soev
ilbutGod!
”
“
Youar
egoi
ngt
ohel
lYay
a.”
“
Yameweh,
koor
eyouhaveneverseenthatman.He
i
sgoi
ngt
otakemest
rai
ghttohellIswear
.”
“
Didn’
tyousayhei
sget
ti
ngmar
ri
ed?
”
“Heisbutsomet hingi
swr onginparadi
se.Hewas
all
stressedy est
erdayandwhenIwentt ohisroom
l
ateron, hewasdr inki
ng.Yame, Ihavenever
beli
evedgor etherecanbeamanwi thahugedick
ekareyadi pornstarsbutthatmany eer
rr!
”
“
Ngngt l
hamawenadon’ tdothat.Youwil
l l
oseyour
j
obwhent hi
ngsturnsouthandy oumustr emember
y
ouarestil
lbui
ldi
ngy ourhousesoy oureall
yneed
t
hatsal
ary.”
“Iam notgoingtohavesexwithhim.Hiswi f
ewill
havemef ir
edwi t
houtsecondthoughtbutjustt
he
thoughtofhavinghi
m deepinsi
demet akingmet o
heav
enei
sh.
.”
“
Contr
olyour
sel
f.Hewi
l
lpr
obabl
yjustf
ucky
ouand
l
eav
ey ou.
”
Yaoner
oll
edhereyesthenlookedatRonawhowas
dri
vi
ngoverwi
ththerental
car.
“
UhIhav
etogo,
wewi
l
ltal
k.”
“
Ok.
”
Yaonewal
kedt
othecarandgoti
n.
“
Wear
egoi
nghome.
”
From hi
sf aceshecoul
dtel
lsomethi
ngwaswr
ong
andthatitwasn’tt
imeforf
unnygames.
“
Yessi
r.
”

*
**

Maatl
asati
nhiscart
alki
ngont
hephonewi
th
Bof
elo’
smother
.
“
Soi
ssheok?
”
“Yes,
theysai
dtheyar
etr
ansf
err
inghert
o
Gaborone.
”
“
Ok,
Iwil
lseewhatt
odowhenshear
ri
ves.Thank
y
oufort
ell
i
ngme.”
Hermothersni
ffed.“
That
’snotal
l
.Shewaswi
th
Sapphi
reandDiamond.”
Maat
la’
shear
tski
pped.“
What
?”
“
Shewaswi
tht
heki
ds.
”
“
Howar
emyki
ds?
”
“
Sapphir
ehasmil
dinj
uri
es,
butt
heysai
dshewi
l
lbe
f
ine.Di
amonddi
edonthespot
.”
“
What
?”
“Iam sorr
ymyson.Thi sisal
lmyfault
.Ishoul
dhave
nev erl
etBofelodri
veatni
ght
.Iam nevergoi
ngto
forgivemyselffort
his.
”
“
Mmel
areng?Idon’
tunder
stand.
”
“
Diamondi
snomor
e.Shepassedon.
”
*
**

Kennyopenedthesmal
l pl
asti
cwi thherspi
cy
bi
lt
ongandst art
edeat
ingfeedinghercravi
ngs.She
l
ookedupatthedoorasPeowal kedin.
“
Hey
!”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Hi.
”
“
Wow,
thatbumpi
sbi
g.”
Kennychuckl
edeat
ing.“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”
“
Icamet
oseey
ou.AndIbr
oughty
ousomet
hing.
”
Peoputt
hespi
cywi
ngsi
nfr
ontofher
.
“
Ther
e…Ihear
dyoul
ovet
hat
.”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Thanky
ou.
”
“Howar ey oufeel
ing?WhenIwaspr egnantIwasa
bull
y.
”Shechuckl edsi tt
ing.“Iusedtoaccusehi m of
cheatingev er
ychanceIgot ,
Ibulli
edhi mintohavi
ng
sexwi thmeev erysingletime.Ili
terall
ybull
ied
everyone,noonewant edtobebymysi de.”
“
Idi
dn’
tmi
nd.
”
“
Justy
ou.IknowEsiusedt
oav
oidme.Shewoul
d
t
ell
mesheisnothomewhensheis.
”
“
Ithi
nky
oudi
dwel
l
.”
“
Idi
d?”
“
Yes.Youwer
eannoy
ingbutIdi
dn’
tmi
nd.
”
“Andnowi t
’smytur
ntobebyy ourside.Iknowwe
arenotexactl
ycl
oseandthat
’smyf aultbecauseI
alwaysfel
tli
keIwasinsomesortofcompet iti
on.
”
“
Youwer
eal
onei
nthatcompet
it
ion.
”
Theybot
hlaughed.
“
Youarer
ight
.Si
nceEsiisnotthere,
itl
eav
esme
wi
tht
hedutytobebyyourside.Howareyoufeel
i
ng?
Howarey
oureall
yfeel
i
ng?Excited?Sad?Ner
vous?”
Kennyl
ookedathert
henatearr
oll
edwonhercheek
assheputherbi
l
tongasi
deandwipedherhands
wit
haservi
ett
e.
“
Uh…Iam scar
ed.
”
“
Why
?”
“I
sitnormal tonotconnectwi ththebaby ?Iget
annoyedwhensheki cks.Iwishshecanj uststop.I
havelosti
nterestinthingsthatusedt omakeme
happy.Idon’tli
kehav i
ngsex, Ihatehav i
ngsex…
matteroffact,Ij
usthat eRona.Ireall
yhat ehim,
str
onghate.Icanmi sshi m butthenIt hi
nkofhow
hecanbeandIgetannoy edinstantly.Hewentf ora
tr
iptoKasaneorMaun…If eel sofreeandhappyi n
hi
sabsence. ”
“
It
’spartofi
t.Ihear
dofwomenli
ket
hat.Therear
e
worsewomenoutt her
e,y
ouar
enottheonlyone.
”
“
IwishIcancont
rol
itmmehel
awhenIhearhi
s
v
oiceyeeeei
i
!”
Peotri
edtoholdi
tbutev
ent
ual
l
ylaughedt
hrowi
ng
herheadback.
“
Ithi
nky
oushoul
dgethel
p.”
“
Gethel
pforwhat
?Forhor
mones?
”
“
Somet
imesi
t’
sdepr
essi
on.
”
“Iam notdepr
essed.Ir
eadaboutt
hatandIam not
suff
eringfort
hat
.”
“
Ist
ill
thi
nkyoushoul
dgethel
p.I
magi
nehowhei
s
f
eel
ingknowi
ngyouhatehi
m.”
“Iknowthat’
swhyIam mov ingbackt oShakawe, I
feelatt
hisstagehewon’tunderst
andmegapehei s
control
l
ing.LennaIwanttoenjoythi
spr egnancyand
Iwon’tevenenjoyi
tifheisalwaystherehovering
overme.”
Kenny
’sphonerangi
nter
rupt
ingher
.Sher
eachedf
or
i
tansweri
ngTshenol
o.
“
Hey
..
”
“Kenny,
hi,
Ihav
esomet
hingt
otel
lyou.I
t’
sabout
Rona.”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#78

Seatedi
nheroffi
ce,
Tshenol
otookadeepbr
eat
has
herhear
tpounded.
“
Whati
sit
?”
“
IsawRonaher
einMaun.
”
“
Yes,
hei
sther
e.Hecamef
orameet
ingt
her
e.”
“
Hewaswi
thawoman.
”
“
Whatdoesshel
ookl
i
ke?
”
“
Lightski
nnedwi
thani
cebody
.”
“Ohy eah,that’
shisPA, uhhYaone.Theywent
together.Shehadt or ev
iewsomet hi
ngwhilehe
sortedouthi smeet i
ngs.“Kennyl
aughed.“You
thoughthei scheating?It’
snothi
ngliket
hat.KePA,
hisnewPA.Gasesepegapebutt hanksfortel
l
ing
meei therway .Iappreci
ateit
.”
“
JustaPA?
”
“Yes.
.sheishi
snewper sonal
assi
stant.Hetrav
els
withhisPA’
ssometimes.Eneshei
sni ce.Il
i
keher,
atfi
rstIwasabitj
ealousmmeshei sharmless.
”
“
Har
mless?
”
“
Yes,
what
’swr
ong?
”
Noloshookherhead.“
Ngng…not
hing.Howar
ethe
babi
es?”
“Theyar
efine,
Iam wi
thsomeone,
letmecal
lyou
backlat
er.
”
“
Ok.
”
Kennyhungupt henTshenololookedatherphone
di
sappointedinhersel
f.I
fshewasi nKenny’
s
posi
ti
onshewoul ddefi
nit
elywantt oknowbutyet
agai
nshedi dn’
twantt obether easonshehada
compli
catedpregnancy.Shesighedf i
guri
ngshe
woulddi
scussi twithKgosilat
eron.

*
**
Lat
erthatdayAtsi
leparkedhi
scari
nfrontofhi
s
gat
ethenwal kedi
nwi t
hApril
.Shel
ookedathim as
hegotdist
ractedwit
hhisphone.
“
What
’swr
ong?
”
“
Mybr
otherhasl
osthi
sdaught
ert
oacaracci
dent
.”
“
Yourol
derbr
other
?”
“
Yes.Hei
satt
hehospi
tal
.Iam goi
ngt
oseehi
m.”
Hewalkedtothebedr
oom thenqui
ckl
ychangedand
ki
ssedhercheek.“
Iwi
llbeback.
”
“
Ok.
”
Her ushedoutt henApriltookoffhershoes.She
openedhiswar dr obetotakeoutat -shi
rtthen
pausedstaringatt hesmal lboxontopofhi st-shi
rt
s.
Shet ookitt
henopenedi t.Herheartpoundedasshe
staredattheri
ng.Shequi cklyt
ookthet -
shirtt
hen
closedthewar drobe,herhandsshaki ng.She
reachedforherphoneandcal l
edhersister.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Atsi
l
ewant
stogetmar
ri
ed.
”
“
What
?”
“Hewant
stogetmarri
ed.Isawt
her
ing.
”Hersi
ster
scr
eamedasshelaughed.
“
Iam shaki
ng.
”
“
Kooookooo.
.kooookooommat
swal
e…”
“Ican’
tbel
iev
ehewantst
ogetmarri
ed.KanaAtsi
le
doesn’
tlookli
ket
het
ypetowantt
ogetmar r
ied.
”
“
TlhammaIam sohappyf
ory
ou.
”
“Iwon’
tsleeporsitst
il
lti
l
lhepopsthequest
ion.I
am soready,Mrs.Apri
lMotsamai
!”
“
Yeswenagi
rl
!”
“I
magi
neketsenakoti
rongkerwel
eri
ng,t
heyar
e
al
wayssay
ingitwi
ll
endintear
sbaseba…”
“
Theyar
egoi
ngt
oswal
l
owt
hei
rwor
ds.
”
“Theyareyetgoingtobreathei
nthroughthestr
oll
.I
can’twai
ttoactuall
ygetcloset
oKenny .Ihav
ebeen
want i
ngtobeherfri
endf orawhil
enow.”
“
Kanawenakana!
”
Apri
lthr
ewhersel
font
hebedgi
ggl
i
ngwhi
l
echat
ti
ng
wit
hhersist
er.

*
**

Mothusi
’
sphonerangashewal
kedi
nthepast
or’
s
of
fi
cewithNanao.
“
Letmet
aket
his.
”
Hewal
kedoutpi
cki
ng.“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Mot
husi
,hav
eyoumadeadeci
sion.
”
“
Yes,Iam sor
ry,
Ican’
tdoi
t.Ihav
eaf
ami
l
ytot
hink
f
or.Bye.
”
Hehungupthensi
ghedwalki
ngi
nsi
det
hepast
or’
s
of
fi
ceandsatbesi
deNanao.
“
Sor
ryaboutt
hat
.”
“
It
’sokson,
let
’sst
artwi
thapr
ayer
..
”

*
**
Atthehospital,
Maat l
alookedatBof el
oconnected
tomachinesast heybeepedst eadil
y .Shehada
bondageonherf oreheadasshebr eathedinthrough
theoxygenmask.Tear sfi
ll
edhisey esashet hought
ofDiamond.Het ookouthi sphoneandl ookedatthe
pict
uresmmagweBof elohadsenthi m.Hel ookedat
hisdaughterthensl i
ppedt othefloorfeeli
ngweak.
Tearsfi
ll
edhi seyesashet ri
edtof i
gur eoutifGod
waspunishinghimt hroughhiskidsbuthi skidswere
i
nnocent.Theyhadn’ tdoneany thing.
Tear
sroll
eddownhi
scheeksaspai
ncrushedhi
s
hear
t.Hecoul
dn’
tevenr
ememberthel
astti
mehe
sawher,washet
hatmuchofabadfat
her?
Heputhi shandsonhi sf
acecryi
ng,cryi
ngforthe
painoflosinghisdaught
er,t
hepainofnotbeing
thereforher.Theywerealotofwhatif
’sinhi
shead
andt heyconti
nuedtobreakhim downevenmor e.

*
**
AtSSKInternat
ionalAirport,
Ronawalkedt
ohi scar
attheparki
nglotandgoti nwit
hYaone.Hestart
ed
thecaranddroveof fswitchi
ngonhisphone.Yaone
putonherseatbeltsit
ti
ngsi l
entl
ybesi
dehim.
“
Wher
edoy
oust
ay?
”
Shelookedathimt hendi
rect
edhimt oherhouse.A
whil
elaterheparkedinfr
ontofhergatethenshe
st
eppedoutwi t
hherbags.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Henoddedr ev er
sing.Shet ookadeepbr eat
ht hen
walkedinsi
det hegateandgoti nherhouse.Things
hadchanged, shecoul dfeelit
.Ofcausehedi dn’t
needt osayitandsheknewshehadt ogetbacki n
herli
ttl
ecorner.Shesi ghedsitt
ingdownonher
couch.Shelookedar oundt henclosedhereyes
thi
nkingofhowhi sdi ckhadst r
etchedit
’swayi nsi
de
fi
ll
i
ngherup.Shehadbeensoov erst
ret
chedy etit
hadfeltsogood.
Yaonetookofherpantsandg-
str
ingthenopened
herl
egslyi
ngonthecouchimaginingthemoment
agai
ntouchi
ngherself
.
*
**

RonadroveinKenny’
syardandparkedbesi
dethe
whiteRubi
con.Hesteppedoutandwalkedinsi
det
he
housecarr
yinghi
ssmal l
bag.Qturnedfr
om theTV
thenranoverj
umpinginhisf
ather
’sarms.Rona
l
aughed.
“
Heybuddy
!”
“
Imi
ssedy
ou.
”
Hesmil
edput
ti
nghi
m down.“
Imi
ssedy
out
oo.
Wher
eismama?”
“
Bedr
oom.
”
“
Ok,
Iam comi
ng.
”
Hewalkedtothebedroom thenwalkedi
nandfound
herpacki
nghercl
othesinhersuit
case.Hecl
osed
thedoorwit
hhisfootandthrewhisownbagonthe
bed.
“
Canwet
alk?
”
Shet
urnedt
ohi
m wi
thasi
gh.“
Hi.
”
Ronapul
l
edhert
othebedandsatdownwi
thher
.
“
What
’sgoi
ngonbabe?
”
Shemov edf
rom hi
m cr
eati
ngspacebet
weent
hem.
“Iam goi
ngt
oShakawe.”
“
Why
?”
“
IneedsomespaceRona.
”
“Doyouwantmetomov
eout
?Icandot
hat
.You
don’
thav
etoleav
e.”
“
Whycan’
tyouacceptmydeci
sionwi
thoutt
ryi
ngt
o
makemedowhaty ouwant
?”
“
Iam t
ryi
ngt
ounder
standwhyy
ouwantt
oleav
e.”
“BecauseIfeel
sosuffocated.Ineedsomeai r
.God
Rona!Doy oualwayshavetomakeev erything
dramatic?NnarraIwanttogot omygr andmot her’
s
houseandIam goingtheretomor r
owmor ning.Iam
dri
ving.
”
“
Youcan’
tdr
ivet
oShakawei
nyourst
ate.
”
“
Whycan’
tI?
”
“
It
’st
oof
ar.
”
“
Sowhat
?”
“
Youcan’
tdr
ivei
ny ourcondit
ion.Iam notgoi
ngt
o
l
ety
oudri
veinyourcondit
ion.
”
“RonaIam pregnantnotsick.Youar esocontrol
l
ing
i
t’sannoyi
ng.Can’tyoujustletmedowhatIwant ?
Youaresosel f
ishandIcan’ tdoitanymore.Iam
mov i
ngbecauseofy ou.Youdon’ tgiv
emespacet o
breat
he,youarealwayst here.Iwanttospendsome
ti
meal oneandIam goingt omor rowmorning
whetheryouli
keitoryoudon’ t.”
“Youarenotdr
ivi
ngt oShakaweandt hat
’sfi
nal
!I
am notaski
ngyou,Iam tell
i
ngyou.Iwil
lgetYaone
tobookyouaplaneticket.
”
Kennyf oldedherarmsangr i
l
yashest ar
ted
undressing.Hewal kedtothebathr
oom thenshe
thoughtfull
ylookedathisphoneandwentt hr
oughi
t.
Sheputi tdownnotf indi
nganythi
ngthenwentback
topackingherbag.
*
**

Laterthatev ening,Nametsosatonthecouch
watchingTVont hehugescreenthoughshecoul dn’
t
reall
yconcent rate.Shewonderedhowherbosswas
doing,losingachi ldcoul
dn’
tbeeasy .Shedidn’
thave
achildofherownbutshest i
llcoul
dn’tbegi
nt o
i
magi nej usthowi tfel
t.
Shesi
ghedr
eachi
ngf
orherr
ingi
ngphone.
“
Heybabe.
.”
“
Heywenal
ebel
etekewena,
war
ebabe?
”
Namet
sof
rowned.“
Who’
sthi
s?”
“I
t’
sReba’sgi
rlf
ri
end.Gi
rlyoubett
erst
ayawayfrom
mymani fyoudon’twanttoknowmepersonal
ly
.I
don’
tpl
aywi t
hwhor esl
ikeyour
self
.Otl
anyel
a.”
“
Youmustbehi
sbabymama.
”
“Babymama?Iam mor ethant hatandwheni t
comest omymanIam notaf raidt osl
eepinajai
l
cell
.Yourclot
hesareinthebin, yes,It
hrewthem
away .Letmecatchyoubusywi t
hmymanandsee
whatIam goi
ngt
odot
oyou.
Let
lwael
abat
ho,
Nxl
a!”
Nametsoheldherphoneconfusedjustast
hedoor
opened.Shequi
ckl
ystoodupasherbosswal kedi
n.
Helookedatherwit
hbloodshoteyes.
“
Iwaswai
ti
ngsoIcoul
dlock.
”
Hewalkedoverandsatdownst
ari
ngattheTV.He
l
ookedbroken,
shewalkedtot
hedoorandlocked.
“
Iam r
eal
l
ysor
ryabouty
ourdaught
er.
”
“
It
’smyf
aul
t.Thi
sisGodpuni
shi
ngme.
”
“Idon’
tknowmuch,IlonggaveuponGodbutI
doubtit
’sGodpuni
shingyou.Amisf
ort
unej
ust
happenedtofal
lonyou.”
Heputhishandsonhisfacebreakingdown,
Nametsowalkedoverandsatbesidehim huggi
ng
hi
m.May bethepainwasnotthesamebutsheknew
whatgri
evefel
tli
ke.

*
**
Kennysl owl
ydraggedherbagoutt hef ol
lowingday
earlyinthemorni
ngwhi l
eRonasl eptleavingaletter
besidehim.Shebitherloweropeningt hedoort hen
pickedhersuit
caseandwal kedoutwi thit
.She
si
ghedget ti
nginQ’sroom.Sheswi tchedont hel i
ght
andl ookedathi
m sleepi
ng,tear
sf i
ll
ingherey es.
Shewal kedoverandshookhi m gently
.
“
Q…”
I
nhi
ssl
eep,
het
urnedawaydeepi
nhi
ssl
eep.
“
Q!”Sheshookhi
m har
der
.
Hesl
owl
yopenedhi
sey
esandl
ookedathi
m.
“
Shh,
wakeup.
”
Her
ubbedhi
sey
esst
ari
ngatherwi
thconf
usi
on.
“Iam goi
ngawayforsometi
me.Iam goi
ngt
ocome
backoncethebabyisbor
nwitht
hebaby.
”
Hesnappedoutofhi
ssl
eep.“
Whyar
e-“
“
Shh…don’
tshout
.Iam goi
ngsot
hatIcangi
vebi
rt
h
t
othebaby
.”
Tear
sfi
l
ledhi
sey
es.“
Butwhataboutdaddyandme?
Idon’
twanty
out
ogo.
”
“
Iknowbuty
ouwantt
hebabyr
ight
?”
Henodded.
“
ThenIhavet
ogo.Iam goi
ngtocomebackand
whenIdoIwon’
tbeyel
l
ingany
mor e.
”
“
Idon’
tmi
ndi
fyouy
ell
.Youcany
ell
atme,
it’
sfi
ne.
”
Kennybl
i
nkedawayhert
ear
s.
“Ihav
etogoandgi
vebi
rt
htot
hebaby
.Iam goi
ngt
o
comeback.
”
Shehuggedhi
m ashef
rownedt
ryi
ngnott
ocr
y.
“
Don’
tcr
y.Iam goi
ngt
ocomebackIpr
omi
se.
”
“
Youar
eleav
ingagai
n.”
“Tear
srol
l
eddownKenny
’scheeks.“
Iam goi
ngt
o
comeback.Il
ovey
ousomuch.”
“
Thendon’
tleav
eus.Myhear
tisr
eal
l
ypai
nful
.”
Kennyki
ssedhi
sforehead.“Iam goi
ngt
ocome
back,
Ipromi
se.Il
ovey ou.
”
“
Idon’
twanty
out
ogo.
”
“
Ok,
let
’st
alkt
omor
row.Sl
eepnow.
”
“
Youwon’
tgo?
”
“
Yes.Iwon’
tgo.Iam goi
ngbackt
osl
eep.Sl
eep.
”
Qwi pedhi stearsandl ai
ddownasshewal kedout
switchingoffhi sl
ightonherwayout .Shepickedher
bagandwal kedoutwi thit.Sheopenedheralready
unlockedcarandputherbagi ntheboot.Shegotin
hercart henopenedhergat eanddroveoutpressing
thegat eremot e.Tearsrol
leddownhercheeksas
shedr oveaway .

FI
VEMONTHSLATER
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#79

RonawaitedforQbytheschoolgatet
ryi
ngKenny’
s
numberforthetent
hti
mebutitstil
lwasn’
tgoi
ng
thr
ough.Hesighedworr
iedl
ythentext
edher.
Rona:Heybabe,ar
eyouok?Whatdi
dthedoct
orsay
yest
erday
?Ar et
heygoi
ngtoi
nduceyou?Doyou
needmet her
e?
Hesentthemessagethensi
ghedtr
yingmmagwe
Tumo’snumberbuti
tconti
nuedtoj
ustri
ngwithout
answer.Heputhi
sphoneawayasQ’steacher
walkedoverwi
thQwho’sshir
twasstai
nedwith
bl
ood.Hef r
ownedst
eppingoutoft
hecar.
“
Whathappenedagai
n?”
“
Hegoti
nvolvedinafightj
ustnow.Wear
ewai
ti
ng
f
ort
heotherparentt
oar r
ive.
”
Ronal
ookedatQ.“
Buddy
,what
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“Hesai
dIhav
eabighead,
Itoldhi
mt ostopitthen
hedrewonmybooksoIpunchedhim becausehe
wasbul
l
yingme.
”
“
Coul
dn’
tyout
ell
teacher
?”
Tearsf
il
ledQ’
sey
esashemumbl
edsomet
hing
beneat
hhisbr
eat
h.
Hert
eachersi
ghed.“Thestudenthasaproblem and
wedidspeakt
ohi sparent
sbuty ouknowhowki ds
ar
e.Qpunchedhim somuchhi snoseisbleedi
ng.Q,
goandwaiti
nclass.
”
Qtur
nedbackandwentt
ocl
assast
het
eacher
f
acedRona.
“Somethi
ngisgoi
ngonwithhim.Ihav
eseenit
.Even
hisgr
adeshavegonedown.Heisthesmart
estki
d
andheistooyoungt
obest r
essed.
”
Ronasighed.“
Hismot
herwentt
ogi
vebi
rt
h.He
missesher.
”
“Isee.Butit
’sgett
ingtohi
m sobadt
hathedoesn’
t
concentrat
einclass.”
“
Iwi
l
lseewhatt
odo.
”
Shesmil
ed.“That’
sgood.Butheisnotinthatmuch
tr
oubl
e.Thatotherboy
’smitherunder
standsthather
sonisabul
l
y.Nki
l
ekabual
eene.(
Ioncespoket
o
her
.)
”
Ronasighedasanot
hercarpar
kedbesideshi
s.A
l
adysteppedoutoft
hecarandlookedatthet
eacher
.
“
Hi…Ij
ustgoty
ourmessage.
”
“Yes,
uhhMr.Mot
samai
,thati
sMr
s.Mat
hebul
a.
Comeonin.
”
Theybot hwal
kedinsidet
hefir
stclassr
oom wherea
teachersatwi
thQandt heotherboywho’sshi
rtwas
alsostai
nedwithbloodbutmorethanQ’s.
“
Ok,
Q,comecl
ose.Yout
ooSam.
”
Theyal
lsatdownthenMr s.Mathebul
alookedather
son’
snoseandsighed.Shelookedattheotherboy
whowasquiet.
“Ok,
Sam,t
ell
uswhathappened.Behonest
.
Rememberwhatwet
alkedabout.
”
Sam l
ookeddown.“Ical
l
edhim bi
gheadt
hendrew
i
nhisbook.Hethenpunchedmeonmynose.”
Theteacherl
ookedatQ.“
Q,t
ell
usy
oursi
deoft
he
st
ory
.Behonest .
”
“Hecall
edmenamesanddr ewonmybook. ”Qtook
outhi
sbookandshowedthedrawing.“
Itol
dhimto
stopbuthedi
dn’
tsoIpunchedhi
m. ”
“
Sam…”
Sam l
ookedatQtear
ful
l
y.“Iam sor
ryIcal
l
edy
oubi
g
headandthatIdr
ewonyourbook.”
Thet
eachert
urnedt
oQ.
“
Iam sor
ryIpunched,
Ishoul
dhav
etol
dteacher
.”
“
Great
.Nowf
ri
ends?
”
Theboy
sst
oodupandhugged.
Theirt
eachersmi
l
ed.“
Great
,nowy
ouguy
scanwai
t
outsi
de.”
Theybot
hwal
kedout
.MsBoof
acedbot
hpar
ent
s.
“Thi
siswhatIal
waysteachthem t
okeeppeace.
Theyareboysandboy
sar eboundtoar
gueand
fi
ght.
”
Mrs.Mathebul
asighedsadl
y.“
Iam real
l
ysorr
y.I
t’
s
j
ustthatt
hedivor
ceisreal
lyt
akingatol
lonhi
m butI
wi
llhaveawordwi t
hhim.”
“
Iam al
sosor
ryhegotpunched.
”
Mr
s.Mat
hebul
asmi
l
edatRona.“
Hedeser
vedi
t.
”
MsBoosmi
l
ed.“
Ok,
youar
efr
eet
ogo.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Theparent
swal
kedout
.Mr
s.Mat
hebul
asmi
l
edat
Rona.
“
Iam r
eal
l
yreal
l
ysor
ryMr
.Mot
samai
.”
“
Noi t
’sok.Theyar
eboys.Tomor
rowi
twi
l
lbe
f
orgotten.Cal
lmeRona.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Dest
iny
.Hopef
ull
yitget
sfor
got
ten.
”
Theybothgotint
hei
rseparat
ecarsanddr
oveof
f.
RonalookedatQthr
oughtherear
viewmir
ror
.
“
Arey
ougood?
”
Helookedathi
mtearful
l
y.“Iwantmama.Yousai d
shewil
lbebackbutsheissti
llnotback.Iwantt
ogo
tomama.Yousaidshewoul dnevergobutsheleft
us.
”
Ronasi
ghed.“
Sheisgoi
ngtocomeback.Ithi
nkshe
gavebi
rt
hthat
’swhyIcan’
tgethol
dofher
any
mor
e.”
Qpausedcr
ying.“
Shegotourbaby
?”
“
Yes.Shemusthav
egot
tenher
.”
“
Weshoul
dgoandseeher
.Weshoul
ddr
ivet
her
e
l
i
kel
astti
me.
”
Ronal
ookedathi
mthought
ful
l
ythensmi
l
ed.“
Ok.
Wewil
lgotomorr
ow.
”
“
Yes!
”
“
Nomor
ecr
ying.
”
Henoddedt
henj
umpedt
othef
rontseat
.

*
**

Namet sostoodint
hekitchenprepar
ingdi
nneras
Sapphirechoppedtheonionswhil
eKagocareful
l
y
cutthegreenpepper.
“
Aunt
y,whataboutme?Whatshoul
dIdonow?
”
Namet
sol
ookedatLet
habowi
thasmi
l
e.“
Uht
ake
outt
hecar
rot
sfr
om t
hef
ri
dge.
”
Let
haboexci t
edlyt
ookoutthecar
rot
s.Themain
dooropenedt henNametsotur
nedandwatchedas
Maatl
awal kedinwithasmil
e.
“
Heyguy
s…”
“
Hidaddy
!”
Hersmileev
engotbiggerwhi
leshewatchedMaat l
a
pi
ckeachchildonebyonegiv
ingeachchildenough
at
tent
ion.Helookedatherwi
thasmil
e.
“
Hey
…”
“
Hi.Uhdi
nneri
sal
mostr
eady
.”
“
Ok.Canwet
alk?
”
Nametsor
educedtheheatonthest
ovet
hen
f
oll
owedhimtothesit
ti
ngroom.
“Uh…Ihavebeental
kingtommagweSapphi r
eand
herheal
thhasbeendeteri
orat
ingsoIfi
guredtotake
herinsoshecanstaywithmef oracoupl
eofweeks,
thatwayshewil
lbeclosert
othehospital
.”
Namet
sonodded.“
Ok.
”
“
Iwi
l
lincr
easey
oursal
ary
.”
Shenodded.“
Towhat
?”
Maat
lasmi
l
ed.“
What
every
ouwant
.”
“
Ok.
:
“
Shei
sal
readyher
e.Letmegether
.”
Hestoodupandwal kedout si
dewher ehecame
backwi thSapphi
re’
smot her.Sapphir
esmi ledwit
ha
gasplookingathermot herthenranov erand
huggedher .Nametsolookedatt hebeautif
ulwoman
andpr essedherl
ipstogetherasshesatbesi des
Maatla.KagoandLet habowal kedoverandsat
besi
deNamet so.
“
Uhguys,
thi
sisSapphi
re’
smot
her
,rememberher
r
ight
?”
Hi
ssonsnoddedt
henBof
elosmi
l
ed.
“
Hiboy
s..
”
“Fel
o,thati
sNamet
so,
thei
rauntwhohel
psus
around.”
Bof
elonodded.“
Ok.
”
“Ri
ght,l
etmeshowSapphi
re’
smot
hert
oherr
oom
guys.
”
Nametsowalkedtotheki
tchenandcont
inued
cooki
ng.Theboysjoi
nedher.
“
Isshegoi
ngt
orepl
acemama?
”
Namest
olookedatKagowhoseemedt
obeabl
eto
r
eadbet
weent hel
inesnow.
“
Idon’
tknow.May
be.
”
Tear
sfi
ll
edKago’
seyes.“Doyout
hinkmamaisever
goi
ngtocomeback?Eversi
nceshelef
tshehasn’
t
comeback.
”
“Everymot herlovesherki
ds.Iknowforsurethat
yourmot herlovesy ouguy
ssomuch.Shei s
defini
telygoi ngtocomeandy ouguyswi l
laskherall
thequest ionsy ouwanttoask.Fornow,youhav eto
respectSapphi r
e’smom.Shei snotabadpersonI
am sur e.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Good.
”
“
Whatabouty
ou?
”
Namet
sosmi
l
ed.“
Iam st
il
lher
ear
en’
tI?Let
’sf
ini
sh
up.
”
Sapphirej
oinedthem t
henst
artedlaughi
ngwiththe
boys.Awhi l
elat
erNametsodishedupandsetup
thetablewit
htheboys.Shewentbackt otheki
tchen
whil
et heboyssatdown.Bof
elowal kedi
nand
l
ookedather .
“
Hi…”
Namet
sol
ookedather
.“Hi
.”
“Idon’
teatwhaty
ouhav eprepar
ed.Doct
or’
sor
der
s.
Couldmakemechi ckensal
ad?”
Namet
sonodded.“
Yes.
”
“
Aren’tthekidstooyoungtobedoingyourj
ob?I
mean, especi
all
yint
hekitchen,any
thi
ngcango
wrongandt heycangetburnt.
”
“
Iam al
way
swat
chi
ngt
hem.
”
“
Iam sur
ebutit
’snotsafegapehel
ait
’snotfai
rfor
t
hem tobedoi
ngwhaty ouareget
ti
ngpaidtodo.”
“
Maat
ladoesn’
thav
eapr
obl
em wi
thi
t.
”
“WellIdoandthingsareabouttochangeher
e.I
thi
nkweshoul dallknowourplacesi
nthehouse.No
cal
li
ngeachot herwithfi
rstnames.I
t’
sabit
i
mpr opri
ate.
””
Maat
lawal
kedi
n.“
Ever
ythi
ngok?
”
Bofelosmiled.“Yes,Iwasj
usttel
l
inghert
hatt
he
doctorsaidIshouldeathealt
hysoIthi
nkIam goi
ng
topreparemy selfsomethi
ng.”
Maatl
alookedatNametso.“Coul
dyouplease
pr
eparesomethi
ngforher?Shegetst
ir
edeasily
.”
“
Yessi
r.
”
Bof
elosmi
l
ed.“
Thanky
ouName.
”
Shewalkedt
henMaat
lal
ookedatNamet
so.“
You
good?
”
“
Yessi
r.
”
Hefrowned.“
Sincewhendoy
ouaddr
essmewi
th
si
r?”
“SinceIshouldknowmypl acei
nthehouse.Please
excuseme, letmeprepar
emmagweSapphi r
eher
dinner.
”
*
**

I
nShakawe, Kennygaspedasthesecondbabysl
i
d
outandstar
tedcryi
ng.Shecri
edsoloudthatt
hemid
wif
elaughed.
“
Shei
sloud.
”
Kennyf
rownedf
eel
i
ngt
heneedt
opushagai
n.
“
Ithi
nkt
her
eisanot
her
.”
“
What
?”
“Ahhhhh!”Shepushedsomuch.Themi dwif
egav e
thesecondgi r
ltothenur seandstoodbetween
Kenny’slegsast hethir
dbaby ’
sheadsli
dfoll
owed
bythebody .Kennypant edstar
ingatherboywaiti
ng
forhi
mt ocr ybuttherewassi l
ence.Shel
ookedat
themidwi f
ewai ti
ngtohearhewasdeador
somethingbutt hemi dwifewhoslappedhi
slit
tl
w
reddi
shbut t
.Hegaspedandgav ealowcrywitha
deepvoice.
“
Wow!Thr
ee!
”
Kennyl
aiddownbr
eat
hingheav
il
y,t
ear
sinherey
es.

*
**

Awhil
elat
er,Kennylayinherwar
dasthenurses
wal
kedinwithherthreebabi
esandputthem besi
de
her
.Oneofthenursessmi l
edhol
dingt
heothergir
l
whowasawake.
“
Feedher
.”
Shesl
owlyhandedherthebaby
,Kennyl
ookedather
wit
hafrownasshecried.
“
Goon…”
Sheswal l
owedt hentookoutherbreastandgaveit
toher.Thenursesmi l
edemot i
onall
y.“Thamma
wenay ouareblessedtogetthree.Eventhoughthey
arefr
aternal
buti t
’ssti
l
lper
fect.IwishIwereyou.”
Kennylookedatheraboutt
otellheri
fshewanted
them somuchshecouldtakethem butrat
her
smil
ed.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?
”
Sheshruggedwi
thaf
orcedsmi
l
east
hebaby
suckedherni
ppl
e.
“
Igety
ou.Iwi
l
lbackl
ater
.Yourki
dsar
ebeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Shewal kedoutt henKennyl ookedatt hebaby ,a
deepr esentf
or minginherhear t.Shelookedatal l
threeoft hem feeli
ngadeephat redt owar dsthem.
Not hingaboutt hem madehersmi leorev enhappy .
Shel ookedatt heot hermom whowassl eeping
facingt heotherdirecti
on.Shet ookoutherni pple
from t hebaby’smout hthenshei mmedi atelystar
ted
crying.Kennyl ookedatt hewool hatshewasput ti
ng
ont hent ookitoffandpr esseditonherl i
ttl
ef ace
suffocat i
ngher .
.
.
Li
keandcommentassoonasyour
eadsowecan
havet
hebonuseswai
ti
ngfous.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#80

Kennylookedatt hewool hatshewasput t

ingon
thentookitoffandpressedi tonherli
tt
leface
suff
ocat i
ngher.Thebabyki ckedherli
tt
lelegs
weakly.Theothermot herturnedwakingupt hen
Kennyt ookof
ft hehatoffherf aceandputitinher
head.
Theothermom smil
edstar
ingatthetwobabi
es
besi
deherthentheot
heronethatshewasholdi
ng.
“
Thr
ee?
”
Kennyl
ookedatherandnodded.“
Uhy
es.
”
“
Thammay
ouar
esobl
essed.Wow!
”
Thebabygaspedt henst
artedcryi
ng.Tearsr
oll
ed
downhercheeksasshegav eherbacktheni
pple
agai
ndisapoi
nted.Theothermom chuckled.
“Igethowyouar
efeel
i
ng.Wow!Whatar
ethei
r
names? ”
“
Idon’
tknowy
et.
”
“
Thi
sisamazi
ng.Wow…Thi
sonei
smysecond.By
t
hewaymynameisMasi
.”
“
Kenny
.”
“
Nicemeet
ingy
ou.
”
Masi’
shusbandwalkedinhol
dingfl
owersforher.
Masismil
edasherhusbandkissedherhandingher
t
heflower
s.Kennyblockedoutthei
rvoi
cesand
l
ookedatherbaby.
MmgaweTumowal kedi
nsmi l
i
ngfr
om mout
htoear
.
Shegaspedl
ooki
ngatal
lthr
eebabi
es.
“
Godi
sfai
thf
ul!
”
Shest
art
edsingingprai
singGod.Kennylookedat
t
hebabysl
eepingthenputherontheside.
“
Godi
swonder
ful
.Thr
ee!
”
MmagweTumo’sphonestar
tedr
ingi
ngagai
nthen
shet
ooki
toutf
rom herbr
aandsmi l
ed.
“
It
’sAr
ona.Tal
ktohi
m.”
Kennysl
owl
ytookt
hephonet
henhungupandputi
t
onherear
.
“
Hel
l
o?Hel
l
o?”Shehandedi
tback.
“
Hemusthav
edr
opped.
”
Thephonest
art
edr
ingi
ngagai
n.MmgaweTumo
answer
edwit
hasmile.
“
Son.
.”
“Goodeveni
ng,uhhcanIpleasespeaktoKenny,I
havebeentr
yingtocal
lherbutherphoneisoff
.”
“
Shegav
ebi
rt
htot
ri
plet
s.”
“
What
?”
“
Yes!Godi
sgr
eatmyboy
,thi
sisar
eal
blessi
ng.
”
“
Thr
ee?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Wow!Ican’
tbel
i
eveImadet
hreebabi
es.
”
“
Her
e,t
alkt
oher
.”
MmgaweTumogav
ehert
hephonet
henKenny
si
ghed.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Heybabe…holyfuck!Ican’
tbel
iev
ethi
s.Imade
t
hreebabi
es…aretheyallgi
rl
s?”
“
No.Twoandoneboy
.”
“
Whatshoul
dwecal
lthem?
”
“
Idon’
tknow.
”
“
UhhowaboutThabi
l
e,Sadi
anduhhAt
ang?
”
“
Fine.
”
“
Ifyoudon’
tli
kei
tit
’sf
ine.Wecangowi
thwhaty
ou
want.
”
“
It
’sf
ine.
”
“
Ok.QandIar
ecomi
ngt
omor
row.
”
“
Youar
egoi
ngt
otaket
hem?
”
“
No.Iknowt
heyneedy
ou.Iam j
ustcomi
ngt
osee
y
ou.
”
Shel
ookedatt
hei
rauntwhowassmi
l
ingatt
hem.
“
Youshoul
dtaket
hem.
”
“
What
?”
“
Ngng…Iam t
ir
ed.By
e.”
“
Ok,
Ilov
eyou.
”
Kennyhugupandgav
ebackt
hephone.
“
Whatar
eyougoi
ngt
ocal
lthem?
”
“
Hesay
sThabi
l
e,Sadi
andAt
ang.
”
“Beaut
if
ulnames.Youmustbet
ir
ed.Vi
sit
inghouri
s
almostover
.”
“
Youar
eleav
ingme?
”
“
Iwi
llcomebackt
omor
row.Theywi
l
lbedi
schar
ging
y
ou.
”
“
Can’
tyoust
ayt
oni
ght
?Ican’
tremai
nal
onewi
th
t
hem.
”
“Youwi llbef
inetonight.Thenursewhowast her
e
wheny ougav ebirt
hi ssoexcited.Shesayssheis
goingtokeepchecki ngupony ou.Don’
twor r
y.I
needt ogoandpr eparet heroom foral
lthr
ee
chil
dren.Yourgr andmot hermustbesohappy
wherev ersheis.
”
Minutesl
atermmagweTumowal kedoutasMasi ’
s
husbandalsowalkedout
.Kennygentl
yturnedaware
ofhersti
tchest
hentri
edtosleepbuthereyeskept
goi
ngtothebabi
esandtheonl
ythi
ngshecoul
d
i
maginewasthem al
ldy
ing.

*
**

Ronapackedhi
sbagi
ncl
udi
ngQ’
sasQj
umpedon
hi
sbedhappil
y.
“
Sowear
egoi
ngt
ohav
ethr
eebabi
es?
”
“
Yes.See?That
’swhymamawasgonef
orsol
ong.
”
“
Ican’
twai
ttoseeal
loft
hem.
”
“
Met
oomyboy
.Tomor
rowwear
egoi
ngt
her
e.”
Ronagrabbedhi
sphoneandqui
ckl
ysentat
exton
thegr
oupchat.
Rona:Justaddedthreemor
etot
hepackage!Kenny
gavebir
thtotri
plet
s.
At
sil
e:Thi
ri
?
Lebi
tso:
Youl
i
e!Thr
ee?Asi
n1,
2and3?
Maat
la:
That
’smyboy
!
At
sil
e:War
ethi
rit
lhemonna?
”
Rona:
Yes!
Lebi
tso:
Hol
yfuck!Whatki
ndofsemendoy
ouhav
e?
Rona:
Iam bl
essed
Maatl
a:Iam happyf
ory
ou,
nowy
oucangety
ourgi
rl
back
Atsi
le:
Final
l
y,kanagonal
etemptati
onkot
ironge
bi
diwagYaone.(Ther
eist
emptat
ionatwor
kcalled
Yaone.)
Rona:Obuamasepa,mothool
egaset
empt
ati
on.I
gotey
esformygir
lonly
Lebi
tso:Youdi
dn’
tsayt
hatwhenshewassucki
ng
yourdi
ck
Rona:
Lebuamasepabol
ait
aka,
ithappenedonce
onl
y
Atsi
le:
Youarel
yi
ng,youpr
obabl
yfuckedherbutof
causeyouwon’
ttel
lus
Maat
la:
Didy
ou?
Rona:
No!
Lebi
tso:
Waaka,youfuckedher
.Mor et
hanf i
ve
monthswit
houtsex?Youarely
ing.Youfuckedher
At
sil
e:Shei
shott
oo
Maatl
a:Nowifwelooki
ntoi
t,shei
shot
,gapeo
l
ebegaalefr
eakynyana
Rona:Youaredi
rt
yminded.Icancontrolmyself
.
YaoneismyPAandthat’
sall.Whateverhappenedi
n
Kasanestay
sther
eandwillneverhappenagain.
At
sil
e:Soy
ouwoul
dn’
tmi
ndi
fLebi
tsot
apst
hatass?
Lebi
tso:
Idon’
tcheat
!
Maat
la:
Sincewhen?
Rona:
Iam sl
eepi
ng.Lonal
esul
enxondo.
Heputhisphonedownt henthought
ful
lycl
earedt
he
chatandtuckedQinbesidehim.Heclosedhi
seyes
wit
hasmi leimagi
ningt
hreekids.Hi
sheartwassti
ll
poundingwit
hexcit
ement .

*
**
Maatlatypedonhi sphonewi
thasmi
l
et henBofel
o
satbesi
dehi m peaki
ng.Hequi
ckl
ymovedhisphone
andlookedather .
“
Shoul
dn’
tyoubesl
eepi
ng?
”
“
Iam notf
eel
i
ngsl
eepy
.Whatar
eyouwat
chi
ng?
”
“
Not
hing.
”
Namet sowalkedfr
om herr oom inherhotpantsand
astringt
opthatexposedt hesidesofherbreasts
goingtothekit
chen.Shewal kedoutfrom t
he
ki
tchensecondslaterholdi
ngabot tl
eofwat erthen
di
sappearedinthepassagegoi ngbacktoherr oom
whileherassshookwi t
heachst ep.
Bof
elol
ookedatMaat
la’
szi
pashi
sdi
ckmov
ed
i
nsi
dehispant
s.
“
Arey
ousl
eepi
ngwi
thher
?”
“
What
?”
“
Arey
ousl
eepi
ngwi
thher
?”
“
Wher
eist
hiscomi
ngf
rom?
”
Bof
eloshookherhead.“
Ijustwantt
oknowseei
ng
sheisfreetowal
kar
ounddr
essedl
i
ket
hati
nyour
presence.
”
“
Sheisabouttosl
eep.Andshepr
obabl
ythoughtI
wassl
eeping.
”
“
TheTVi
son,
ofcauseshecanheart
henoi
se.
”
Hewentbackonhi
sphone.“
Iam notsl
eepi
ngwi
th
her
.”
Atextr
eportedinthenhereaditwit
hasmi l
eand
r
epli
edtoit.Bof
elosighedstar
ingattheTV,f
ora
whil
eshejustkeptquiet
.
“
Maat
la…”
Hel
ookedather
.“What
?”
“
Pleaset
ell
met
het
rut
h.Ar
eyousl
eepi
ngwi
thher
?”
“
What
’sgoi
ngonwi
thy
ou?
”
“
Howcany
ousl
eepwi
tht
hechi
l
dren’
snanny
?”
“
WhoIsl
eepwi
thi
snonofy
ourbusi
ness.
”
Shesnif
fedcry
ing.“
Iwanttofixt
hings.Thedeat
hof
Diamondhastaughtmeagr eatl
esson.Idon’
twant
tobeangryanymore.Iwantustorai
seourchil
dren
t
oget
her
.”
“Rai
sewhi
chchi
l
drenwheny
ouar
eref
usi
ngwi
thmy
son.
”
“Wewi l
ltakehim andst
aywit
hhim.Youneed
someonebyy oursi
deandIwil
lbel
yi
ngifIsai
dI
don’
tlovey ou.Il
oveyousomuchandIwantusto
fi
xthi
ngs. ”
“
Iam st
il
ldeal
i
ngwi
thmydi
vor
ce,
wewi
l
ltal
kaf
ter
t
hat
.”
Bofel
osmiledandki
ssedhi
scheek.“
Fairenough.I
thi
nkIshouldgoandl
iedown.Thepi
ll
sarekicki
ng
i
n.”
Shestoodupandwal kedtotheguestr
oom.Anhour
l
aterMaatlagotupandwentt ohi
sbedroom andlaid
downwi t
htheli
ghtsoffwhil
etext
ingonhisphone.
Minutesl
aterheputhisphonedownast hedoor
openedandclosedfoll
owedbysomeonej oi
ninghim
onthebed.Heputhishandsonherwai stki
ssingher
asshesatonhim.
*
**

Atthehospit
al,t
henursewal
kedinandsmi l
ed
st
aringatthethr
eecutebabi
esallpeacef
ull
y
sl
eeping.HereyeswenttoKennywhowasst il
l
awake.
“
Hey
…howar
ethey
?”
“
Fine.
”
Thenursesatbesi
deherwit
hasmil
e.“
Idon’
thavea
chil
d.Godneverbl
essedmewit
hachil
d.If
eelso
j
ealousever
ytimedif
fer
entwomenwal
koutwith
thei
rbabi
esinhere.
”
Kennyl
ookedather
.“Sor
ry.
”
“
It
’sok.Ihav
elear
ntt
olivewi
thit
.”Shegotupand
l
ookedatthebabi
eswit
hasmile.“Thi
sisbeaut
if
ul.I
t
hinkIshoul
dgoandadoptmyown. ”
“
Youcanadoptt
hem.
”
Thenur
sel
aughed.“
Sur
e.”
“
Iam ser
ious.Idon’
twantt
hem.
”
“
What
?”
“
Idon’
twantt
hem.Youcanadoptt
hem.
”
“
Arey
ouser
ious?
”
“
Yes.Youadoptt
hem.
”
Thenurselookedather
,hopef i
l
li
nghereyesthen
tur
nedbackt oal
lthr
eebabies.Shet
earf
ull
ylooked
atKenny.
“
Arey
ouser
ious?
”
“Idon’
twantthem.Youcanadoptt
hem.Pl
ease
adoptthem andt
akethem.
”
Thenur
sesmi
l
ed.“
Ok.Let
’st
alkt
omor
row.Today
j
ustsl
eep.
”
“
Youwi
l
ladoptt
hem?
”
“
Wewi
l
ltal
k.Iam comi
ngback.
”

*
**

Thef
oll
owi
ngmor
ning,
Masi
wokeupt
oherbaby
cryi
ngt henshepul l
edhercl
osertakingoutbr east
thengav ehert henippl
e.Shestart
edsucki nggoi ng
quiet.Mi nut
eslaterthebabyslowlysleptthenshe
sighedt urni
ngt oKennywhowassl eepingont he
otherbedwi t
honl yonebaby.Shefrowned.
“
Kenny
!”
Kennyopenedhereyesandl
ookedatMasi
whowas
nowsit
ti
ngupright
,
“
Huh?
”
“
Wher
ear
ethebabi
es?
”
Kennyl
ookedbesi
dehert
henf
rownedonl
yseei
ng
Sadi
.
“
Theywer
eher
e.”
Masi
gotof
fbed,
herhear
tpoundi
ng.
“
What?Someonemusthavestol
enthem.”She
r
ushedoutcall
i
ngt
henurseswhi
leKennyjustst
ared
wi
thconf
usion.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#81

Masiwal
kedbackwit
htwonur
sesandpoi
nted
wher
ethebabi
eshadbeen.
“
Theyweret
here,
Kennyiswaki
ngupr
ightnow,
it
meanssomeonestol
ethem.
”
Thenur sewhohadhel pedKennywalkedi
npushi
ng
thekidsinside.Masi
lookedathert
hensighedi
n
rel
iefhuggingKenny.
“
OhmyGod!ThankGod!
”
Kennylookedatt
heki
dssi
l
ent
lycr
yingt
hent
he
nursesmiled.
“Theywentforanex
ami
nat
ion.Mor
ningKenny
,how
areyoufeel
i
ng? ”
Kennyputherhandsonherfacecryi
ng.Masirubbed
herbackunderst
andi
nghowshemusthav ebeen
feel
i
ng.Shecouldn’
timagi
newhatitwouldfeell
ike
towakeupwi t
hherdaughtergone.
“
It
’sal
ri
ghtl
ove…”
Thebabyboystar
tedcry
ing.Masi
smi
l
edget
ti
ng
hi
mt henhandedhi
mt oKenny.
“
Ithi
nkhei
shungr
y.”
Theyalll
ookedathersmi li
ngwaitingf
orhertoput
thenippl
einhismout h.Sheswal lowedthenstart
ed
feedi
nghim.Shel ookedathi m ashesuckedonher
nippl
e,herangerandhat redri
sing.Shecouldjust
throwhim agai
nstthewal landwat chhi
m die.The
nurseswalkedoutleavingtheonewhohadkepther
companyt heprevi
ousni ght.
“
Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ngt
oday
?”
“
Fine.
”
Shesmi l
ed.“
Yesterdayyouweretal
kingaboutgi
vi
ng
them f
oradopti
onbutIunderstandyou…y oumust
bescaredthoughdon’tworr
y.Youaregoingtobe
fi
ne.Youaregetti
ngdischar
ged.Youandt heki
ds
arefi
ne.”
Masisatonherbedchangi
ngherdaught
er’
sdiaper
asKennyconti
nuedtostar
eatAtangi
nnocentface.
Masi
tur
nedt
oher
.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
Kennyr
aisedherheadandnodded.

*
**

Thatsamemor ning,Maatl
awal kedoutofhis
bedroom inasuit.Bofel
olookedathim andsmi l
ed,
niggalookedsohandsomei nthatthr
eepiecesuit
thatshefoundher sel
fbl
ushing.Shehadnev erseen
himinasui tt
il
lthatmoment .
Hel
ookedatherandsmi
l
ed.“
Hey
..
”
“
Mor
ning.Ihav
etogot
ohi
ghcour
tfort
hedi
vor
ce.
”
“
Ok.Goodl
uck.
”
Namet
sowal
kedf
rom t
heki
tchenandl
ookedathi
m.
“
Morni
ng.
”
“
Hi.
”
Namet
sowal
kedpasthi
m goi
ngt
ohi
sbedr
oom and
st
art
edcl
eani
ng.Bof
elosl
owl
yst
oodup.
“
Arey
ouget
ti
ngt
hechi
l
dren’
scust
ody
?”
“Hopef
ull
yso.Esi
hasn’
tseenherki
dsin10mont
hs
nowsoIguessthatwil
lworki
nmyf av
or.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Ihav
etogo.
”
Hewal kedoutl
eavi
nghisf
ragrancesmell
i
nginthe
house.Bofel
owatchedashiscardroveof
fthenshe
walkedtothebedr
oom whereNamet sowasmaking
thebed.
“
Soy
oucl
eanhi
sroom t
oo?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Canwet
alkaboutsomet
hing?
”
Namet
sol
ookedather
.
“Idon’tthinkweari
nghotpant
sisappropri
ate.You
can’tdressliket
hatwhenyouknowy ourbossisa
manunl essofcauseyouwanttosl
eepwi t
hhi m.”
“
Mr.Mot
samai
hasnev
ercompl
ained.
”
“Iam t
ell
i
ngy ou,i
t’
snotrightsohowabouty ouj ust
dressupappropri
atel
y.Onemor ethingIthi
nky ou
canstopcleani
ngthebedr oom.Si
nceMaat laandI
arefi
xi
ngt hi
ngs,Iwil
lcl
eanhisroom.Wenaj ust
sti
cktotherestofthehouseandt hekids.
”
“
Withal
lduerespect
,Iwoul
dli
keMr.Motsamait
o
t
ell
methatbecauseheistheonepay
ingme.”
“Iam her
enow,
youwil
lbet
alki
ngmainl
ywi
thme
nothim.Howmuchdoyougetpai
d?”
“
P3500.
”
“
That
’sal
otofmoney
.”
Nametso’
sphoner
angt
henshet
ooki
toutand
answer
ed.
“
Hel
l
o?”
Amalevoi
cespoke.“
Oset
seongadi
l
e?(
Arey
oust
il
l
angr
y?)
”
“
Whywoul
dIbeangr
y?”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Iam notgoi
ngt
osayany
thi
ng.Dowhaty
ouwant
.”
“
Icoul
dn’
tjustr
efuse.
”
“
Whyar
eyouexpl
aini
ngy
our
sel
ftome?
”
“
It
’sonl
yforaweekort
wo.
”
“Dowhaty
ouwant.Inowknowmyst
andsoIam
act
ual
lygl
adt
hisi
shappening.
”
“
Babecomeon.
.”
“
Iam wor
king,
bye.
”
“
CanIt
akey
ououtt
oni
ght
?”
“
Iam wor
kingt
oni
ght
.By
e.”
Shehungupandputthephoneinherpocketas
Bofel
ostar
edatherwit
habitofrel
i
ef.
“
Wewi
l
ltal
kaboutev
ery
thi
ngel
seast
imegoeson.
”
Nametsowat
chedasshewal
kedoutt
hencont
inued
cl
eani
ngther
oom

*
**

Att
hemagi
str
ate’
sof
fi
ce,
thenewl
ywedcoupl
e
walkedouthol di
nghandssmi li
ngwhi l
ethe
photogr
apht ookmul ti
plepictures.Inhergown,
Nanaoslowl ywalkedtot hecarwi thherhusband
smili
ngasr elati
vessmiledstaringthem.Theyallgot
i
ntheircarsandt ookoffheadedt owherethe
cel
ebrati
onwasgoi ngtot akeplace.

*
**

Sel
etsolookedatacoupleofpictur
esthathadbeen
postedbyMothusi
’scousins.Shetappedon
Nanao’sgownandshookherhead.Shezoomedi n
andlookedathermake-upshakingherhead.Her
col
leaguesatbesi
deher.
“
Whatar
eyoul
ooki
ngat
?”
“
Myexgotmar r
ied.
”Sheshowedherthepi
ctures
l
aughing.“
Iwouldneverwearsuchagownonmy
weddi
ngday .Okareoreki
legownkomachineng.
(
It
’sli
kesheboughtthegownataChineseshop.)
”
Thecol
l
eaguel
aughed.“
Buti
t’
snotbad.
”
“
Ny aabathong.Onyourweddingdayyoushoul
d
l
ooky ourbest.Youshoul
dn’
tlookl
ikeyouar
ebeing
f
orcedintoit
.Lookatthebri
desmaids.
”
Theyswipedandlookedatthepeachdr
esses
l
aughing.“
HereIagreewit
hy ou.
”
“Thi
sweddinglooksboringhel
a.Thethi
ngwith
Nanaoisthatshewasi nsuchahurryt
ogetmar r
ied.
Isti
l
lcan’
tbeli
eveMot husit
ookherbackevenaft
er
shecheatedonhim withamarri
edmant hentr
ended
onfacebookforbeingahomewr ecker
.Iwonder
whythatwifedi
dn’tsue.Sheshoul
dhavesuedher .
”
“
Shei
sthatgi
rlwagot
renda?
”
“
Yes.Thehomewr
ecker
.”
“
Whatawow!
”
“Andtot hi
nkthatapparentl
ythatmar r
iedmanhas
HIV.Ireall
yfeelsorr
yforMot husi
.It
’sjustt
hat
societ
yput spressureonpeopletogetmar ri
ed.He
mustf eelhehasnochoi cebuttomar ryher
.Ireal
ly
wishedhewoul dfi
ndsomeonehegenui nel
yloved
andmar ryher.
”
“
Somepeopl
ejustt
aket
imet
ofi
ndsomeone.
”
“
Igetthatbutt
omar rysomeonewhodoesn’ t
r
espectyouissomethingelse.Nanaodoesn’
t
r
espectthatman.Kanathisli
ttl
engwanablamedme
f
orhercheati
ng.Idon’tl
i
keher .
”
“Butsheisnowyourbabydaddy’
swifesoyou
shouldputasi
dethatandj
ustaccepther
.”
Sel
etsogotherphoneandl
ookedatt
hegownagai
n
l
aughing.
“
Ifdesper
atewasaper
son!
”

*
**”
Atcour
t,Maatl
asteppedoutofhiscarashi
slawyer
par
kedbesidehim.Thelawyerst
eppedoutthent
hey
bumpedfist
s.
“
Ready
?”
“
Yeah.
”
ARangeRoverpar
kedtheothersi
dethenSean
st
eppedoutandopenedthedoorforEsi
whogotout
i
nashor twhitedresst hatexposedherlegs.She
fl
i
ppedherl ongweav ebehi ndasSeant ookherhand.
Shecatwalkedinherheel s,Maat l
aswall
owed, she
l
ookedsomuchbet t
ert hanev er
.Shehadlostsome
weightbutsti
llmaintainedhercur v
esandass.They
metupwi ththei
rlawy erwalkinginsidet
hecour t
.
“
Let
’sgeti
n.”
“
IhopeIgetthechil
dren’
scustody.Iam notgoi
ngt
o
l
ett
hatbastardr
aisemyki ds.Otl
any el
a.”
“
Let’sgo,youhav
eagoodcase.Ifshenev er
r
epor t
edyoufort
het
imeyoubeathert henyouare
f
ine.Itwi
l
lbeherwor
dagainstyours.Let’
sgeti
n.”
Theywalkedinsi
det hecourtandsatontheother
si
de.Esitookoffhersunglassesl
ookingatMaatl
a.
Theylookedateachot herforawhi
lethenthe
magistr
atewalkedin.

*
**

Awhi
l
elat
er,
theyal
lwal
kedout
,Maat
lasmi
l
ing.
“
Fucky
es!
”
Hislawyerl
aughed.“
See?Youwer
ewor
ryi
ngov
er
nothing.
”
“
Iwasscar
ed.
”
Esi
wal
kedov
ert
ohi
m al
one.
“
Ican’tbel
i
evey
oudeni
edput
ti
ngy
ourhandson
me.”
“
Ican’tbel
iev
eyouhav
en’
tseeny
ourki
dsi
n
months.”
“
BecauseIwasscar
edf
ormyl
i
fe!
”
“
It
’sbecausey
ouwer
eenj
oyi
ngnewdi
ck.
”
“Youarepat
het
icbuti
t’
sok.Iwi
l
lsseet
hem dur
ing
holi
day
s.”
“Weneedtobeabl
etocommuni
cat
e.Ineedy
our
number.
”
Hehandedherhi
sphonet
henEsi
punchedi
nher
newnumber.
Sheputonhersungl
assesgi
vi
ngbackt
hephone.
“
Bye.
”
“
Wait
…”Maatl
alookedatSeanwhowasst
andi
ng
f
eetf
rom t
hem wat
ching.
“
What
?”
Heshookhishead.Esi
tur
nedandwal
kedt
othe
RangeRov
erthenSeankissedher
.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
“
Let
’sgo.
”
Heopenedthedoorforher.Shegoti
nthenhe
j
umpedi nanddroveof
f.Esitookof
fhersungl
asses
asatearrol
leddownhercheek.
“Ishoul
dhaverepor
tedhimtot
hepol
i
ce.Ican’
t
beli
eveIdi
dn’
tli
stentoyou.
”
“Iam sor
rybutatl
eastyoucanalwayshav
ethem
duri
ngschoolholi
daysandweekends.
”
“
Iwant
edt
ost
aywi
tht
hem.
”
Herubbedhercheek.“
Iam sor
ry.Iknowwhatcan
t
akeyourmindofitforawhil
e.”
Esi
lookedathi
mthensmi
l
ed.“
Youar
enut
s.”
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”

*
**

Meanwhi leMaat lagotinhiscarfi

ndi
ngithardto
breathe.Hest i
l
l couldn’
tgetri
doftheimageofSean
kissi
ngher .Therehadbeent imewher ehewasi n
Sean’sshoes, t
het imehehadt hegir
l.Hesmiled
recal
lingthefir
stt i
met heymetthenhowt hei
rlove
bloomedf rom thereon.
Hesattherewishinghehaddonet hingsdif
fer
entl
y,
Godknewhel ov edhersomuchandnowoman
wouldevercomecl osetohowEsi hadbeen.Hetook
hi
sphonet hi
nkingtocallherbutt
henshewaswi th
hi
m.Hesi ghedput t
inghisphonedown, hehadto
acceptwhathecoul dn’
tchange.

*
**
Lat erthatday,Ronaparkedarental
carbesi
des
rragweTumo’ soldvan.Hesteppedoutwit
hQand
tookt hethingshehadboughtf r
om theboot
.
Rr agweTumoopenedt hedoorasheknocked.
“
Son.
.”
Ronasmil
edandfol
lowedhiminsi
dewi
thQ.They
satdownput
ti
ngeveryt
hingdownasmmgawe
Tumojoi
nedthem.
“
Rona…Iam sohappyt
oseey
ou.
”
“
Wher
eisshe?
”
“
Insi
de.Youcancome.Hi
Q…”
Qsmi l
edexci
tedlythenwal
kedtothebedroom
wherehismotherwas.Theywalkedi
nandl ookedat
Kennywhowasl y
ingonthebedfaci
ngthewallwhil
e
theki
dslaybehindher.
Rona’shear
tstar
tedpoundingashest aredatal
lof
them.Helookedatthem asQst ar
ed,f
r ozentohi
s
spot.Ronasl
owlypickedthefi
rstgi
rl
.
“
Shi
t!
”
Ql
ookedathi
sfat
herwhoqui
ckl
ycor
rect
edhi
msel
f.
“
Sor
ry…Imeantwow!
”
Heputdownthegi
rlandpickedtheboyasQ
t
ouchedthei
rsmal
lhands.Tearsfi
ll
edRona’
sey
es.
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evet
his…”
Qlookedathi
smot
hersl
eepi
ngt
henshookher
l
ight
ly.
“
Mama.
.”
Kennysl
owl
yopenedherey
esandl
ookedatQ.
“Imissedyou.Yousai
dyouwer
egoi
ngt
ogobuty
ou
sti
ll
left
.”
Hehuggedher
.Kennyputherar
msar
oundhi
m.
“
Sorr
y.”
“
Ifor
giv
eyou.Ar
eal
lthr
eeoft
hem our
s?”
Shenodded.“
Yes.
”
Ronalookedathersmi
l
ingemot
ional
l
y,t
ear
sinhi
s
eyes.
“
Thi
sisamazi
ng.Di
dyouknow?
”
MmagweTumosmi
l
ed.“
Shet
houghtt
heywer
etwo.
Thet
hir
donewasasur
pri
se.
”
Ronaputt
heot
herchi
l
ddownt
henl
ookedatKenny
.
“
Ilov
eyou.Thanky
ouf
ort
his.
”
“
Q,come.
”
MmgaweTumot ookQ’shandandwalkedout
cl
osi
ngthedoorbehind.Ronaknel
tbefor
eKenny
hol
dingherhand.
“
Thanky ousomuchf orthi
s.Ican’
tbel
i
eveIam a
f
athert
ot r
ipl
ets.Il
ovey ousomuchandIswearI
wi
llnev
ertakey ougrantedagain.
”
Hel
eanedov
ert
oki
ssherbutshemov
edherhead.
“
Idon’twantt
odothi
sanymore.Idon’twantt
his
r
elat
ionshi
panymor
e.Iwantustobreakup.”
“
What
?”
“
It
’soverRona.Thisr
elat
ionshi
pisov
er.Iwanty
ou
t
otakeallyourki
dsandleave.”
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#82

Hel ookedatherforawhi
leexpect
inghert
osmil
e
andl aughitof
fbutsher
emainedwi t
haseri
ousl
ook
thathef r
owned.
“
War
eng?(
Whatar
eyousay
ing?
)”
“
Iam br
eaki
ngupwit
hyou.Iwantnothi
ngtodowi
th
y
ou,t
akeyourki
dswi
thyouwheny ouleav
e.”
“Ar
eyoucr
azy
?Wher
eam Isupposedt
otaket
he
babi
es?
”
“
Idon’
tcar
eRona.Ican’
tdot
hisany
mor
e.”
“
Dowhat
?”
“Thisrelat
ionship.Ican’tpr
etendanymore,Iam ti
red
ofit.Idon’
tlov eyouany more.Thelovel
ongended
whenIwentt ojai
lbecauseofwhaty oudid.I
thoughtmay be…”Shet ookadeepbr eat
hst ar
ingat
him astearsr ol
leddownhercheeks.“ It
hought
may betakingy oubackwi ll
makemel oveyouagain
butithasnot .Ididn’
tev enwanttheseki
dsandnow
t
heyarethr
ee…Idon’
twantyou.Iwantyoutoleav
e
mealone,t
akey
ourkidswit
h.Ever
ythi
ngthat
r
emindsmeofyoujustannoysme.”
“Theseki
dsar
ealsoyours.Iunder
standi
fyoudon’t
l
ov eme…Igett
hatbutthesekidsneedyouri
ght.Ke
i
sakaebanannaKenny.(Wher eIt
aketheseki
ds
Kenny?)
”
“YoutookcareofQ, whatwil
lstopyoufrom t
aki
ng
careofthem?Ineedsomet i
met ofi
gureoutwhatI
real
lywantwithouty ouoryourkidsambushingme.I
don’tevenknowwhyy oubr
oughtQwhenhecoul d
haveremainedbehi nd.Youjustwanttousehimto
emot i
onall
yblackmai lmebuttodayit
’snotgoi
ngto
work.Iwantyouf arfrom me.”
Ronachuckl
ed.“
Ist
hisaj
okeorsomet
hing?
”
“Idon’
tloveyouRona.Ihav en’tlovedyouinthe
l
ongestt i
meandIcan’ tpretendany more.Youthi
nk
afterf
iveyear
sofbei ngi njailIwouldbecrazyin
l
ov ewithyou?Idon’tlovey ou.Iwantnot hi
ngtodo
withyousopleasetakey ourki dsandgo.Idon’t
wanttohav eanyt
hingt hatisy ours.Justgetyour
ki
dsandl
eav
e.”
Helookedi
nherey
esandshookhi
shead.“
Thi
sis
notyou.
”
“Thisisme!Thi sismer eali
zi
ngIcan’tkeepl yi
ngto
my selfanymore.Yourpr oblem ist
haty outhinkIam
socr azyinlov
ewi thy ou.Wel l
Iam not.Idon’tlov
e
youRona.Met olerati
ngy oudoesn’tmeanIl ovey ou.
Iam goi ngtosendi nmyr esi
gnati
onletteratyour
company .
”
Shesl owlygotof fbedandl eanedagai nstthewal lat
thepai nbroughtbyt hesti
tches.“ Getyourkidsand
l
eav emeal one.Ihavehadi twithy ou.Ididn’
twant
theseki ds.ThereislotIwantt odowi thmyl ifeandI
am goi ngtoachievemygoal s.Iwi l
lnotletyourkids
stopme.Myagemat eshav edonesomuchi nli
fe
whileIwasi njai
landnowIam t rappedagai nwith
kids.Takey ourkidsandgo. ”
“
Youdon’
tmeant
hat
.”
“Imeani
t.Ishoul
dhav echosenNate.Atleasthe
wouldgi
venmet heloveIdeserv
e.Hehasal ways
beenbet
terthanyou.Imadeahugemi stake
choosi
ngy
out
hatni
ght
.”
Ronasl
owlysatdownst
ari
ngatherasherwor
ds
sl
owlybr
okehim.
“Hehasal waysbeenabet termanr i
ghtfr
om the
begi
nning,Ishouldhav echosenhim whenIwentf or
myinternshi
p,ifIdid,
Iwoul dhaveneverwenttojail
.
Foryouit’
sallaboutsex.Yout hi
nksexcansol v
e
anyt
hingbutitwillneversolveanyt
hing.
”
Thebabyst
art
edcr
ying.Ronagotupandt
ookheri
n
hi
sarmsasshecri
ed.
“
Cany
ouf
eedher
?Shei
scr
ying.
”
Shestoodst i
l
l f
orawhi l
ethensl
owlywalkedtot
he
bedandsatdown.Shet ookthebabyandgaveher
theni
pple.Ronawat chedherasshefedthei
r
daughter
,tearsblur
ri
nghissight
.
“Okfi
ne.Iam t heproblem.Igetit.It
’sok.Ifi
t’
sme
youdon’twantany more,Iwil
l acceptyourdecisi
on.
Butdon’tpunishthekidsbecauseofme, t
heydidn’
t
doanything.Theyareinnocent .Qlovesyousomuch
babe…y ouarehisent i
reworld.”
“IneedtofocusonwhatIwantt
oo.Iam notgoi
ng
tosacri
fi
cemygoalsandvisi
onsforachi
ld.Iwi
l
l
seehim whenIcan.
”
MmagweTumosl owlyopenedthedoorandwal
ked
i
nholdi
ngsoftporri
dgeforKenny.Shel
ookedat
Ronacat
chingthetensi
onintheroom t
henhestood
upandwalkedout.
Confused,mmagweTumol
ookedatKenny
.“I
s
ever
ythingok?
”
“
Yes.Hei
staki
ngt
hechi
l
dren.
”
“What
?Hecan’tt
aket
hem.Iwi
ll
haveawor
dwi
th
hi
m.Theseki
dsshoul
dremai
nwithy
ou.
”
“
Iwanthi
mtot
aket
hem whi
l
eIr
ecov
er.
”
“
Whatdoy
oumean?
”
“
Ronaisgoingt
ogowi t
hhiski
dswhenheleaves
t
hishouse.Hewi
ll
takecar
eofthem whi
l
eIrecover
.”
“
Recov
er?Ar
eyoui
nsane?
”
“Heshoul
dtakehi
ski
ds.NnaIcan’
thandl
ethr
ee
kids.
”
“
Jeso!
”
Kennylookedatherdaughter
.“Whenhel
eav
eshei
s
goingwit
ht hem,Iam goi
ngbacktomy
grandmother’
shouse.
”
“
Arey
oul
i
steni
ngt
oyour
sel
f?”
“Yes.Heshouldtakehi
ski
dsandgowi
tht
hem.I
can’thandl
ethr
eekidsmmagweTumo.
”
“
Youar
esi
ck,
whosay
ssomet
hingl
i
ket
hat
.”
“Ican’
thandlethem.Maybei
fitwasonl yonechil
d
butthree?It
’st
oomuch.IhavethingsIwanttodo
withmyl i
feandtheseki
dsar
ej usttenstepsbackin
myl i
fe.”
MmagweTumoshookherheadi nshock.“What
happenedt
oyou?Thisi
snottheKennyIknow.You
arebegi
nni
ngtosoundl
ikey
ourmot her
.”
KennylookedatmmgaweTumo, t
earsinhereyes.
“MaybebecauseIam herdaught
er.Theapple
wouldn’
tfal
lfarf
rom t
hetreewouldit
?”
MmagweTumoshookherhead.“
Idon’
tbel
i
eve
t
his.
”
“Ronai
sgoingtot
akehiskidswhenhel
eav
es.Iam
goingt
ofocusonmyli
fe.”
“Youaredi
sappoi
nti
ngme.Nomotherwoul
dsound
thewayyousound.Somet
hingi
sdeepl
ywrong
here.
”
“
Nothi
ngiswr
ongi
nmewant
ingt
odobet
terf
or
mysel
f.
”

*
**

Outsi
deRonast
oodagai
nsthi
scaronhi
sphone
wit
hLebit
so.
“
Shesai
dwhat
?”
“Isti
l
l can’
tbel
i
eveit
.Ikeept
hinki
ngshewi
l
lsayi
t’
s
allajokeorsomethi
ng.”
“
Eish.Idon’
tknowany
mor
e.“
“
Shei
sjustgi
vi
ngupt
heki
dsj
ustl
i
ket
hat
.Al
lof
t
hem.
”
“
Peooncesai
dthatshesuspect
edKennywas
depressedtheot
hert
imewhenshewasst
il
l
pregnant.
”
“Idon’tbel
iev
ethatbul
lshi
t,especi
all
ynowIdon’ t
.
Cany ouimagineshecompar edmet othatguywho
oncewant edher?Shesaidshemadeami stakeby
choosingme.Thatdoesn’tsoundlikedepressi
onto
me.Ihav eneverhear
dofdepr essi
onthatsounds
l
ikethat.”
“Buti
t’
snotnor
mal t
hatshegi
vesupt
heki
dsj
ust
aft
ertheyar
eborn.
”
“Shesayssheneverwantedt
hekidsandther
eisa
l
otshewant sinl
ife,
theki
dsareaset
back.Qis
goingtobebroken.”
“Your eall
ycan’ tforcehert ot akecar eofthechildren
i
fshedoesn’ twantt o.May beshei sstil
linshock,I
mean, shejustgav ebi r
thtot hreeki ds.Whowoul d
bereadyf orthat?Justt aket hem, afteracoupleof
daysofdeal i
ngwi t
ht heshock, shewi l
lcomear ound.
Iam tal ki
ngaboutt hekid’sissuebecauseIdoubt
thereisasanewomanwhowoul djustgiveupher
kidsjustlikethat.Andont hei ssueofy our
rel
ati
onshipwit
hher,ther
eisnothi
ngy oucandoi f
shedoesn’tl
oveyouany more.I
tmeansallalongshe
hasjustbeentol
erat
ingyounotthatsheactuall
y
l
ovedy ou.
”
MmagweTumowal
kedout
.
“
Ihav
etogo,
goshar
p.”
“
Ok,
tel
lmehowi
tgoes.
”
“
Yahsur
e.”
Hehungupandl ookedatmmagweTumo.“ Kennyis
tel
l
ingmeal otofnonsensethatIr
efuset
obeliev
e.I
don’tknowwhat’
sgoingonwi t
hheranymore.She
sayssheisgoingbacktoShakawe.”
Ronaswal
l
owed.“Yeah…Idon’
tknowwhatIam
goi
ngtodowi
ththechil
drenal
lal
one.
”
“Iwantyoutoleavethem heresoIcant akecar
eof
them butal
oneIwon’ tbeabletomanagebecause
rragweTumoi snotfeeli
ngthatwel l
.Itwasgoingt
o
beeasywhenIwoul dbeassist
ingKennybutnowt o
takecareofbabies,t
hreeisalot.Ifeelsoguil
ty
becauseIam fail
ingyou.Idon’
tev enknowwhatt o
do.If
eel
mysi
steri
n-l
awi
stur
ningi
nhergr
ave.
”
“No.Youshouldn’
tfeell
i
kethat.Iwil
ltaket
hem.My
motherwil
lbemor ethanwil
li
ngt ohel
p.May be
Kennyisdeal
ingwiththeshockofhav i
ngthr
eekids
but-
“
Fr
om insi
dethehouse, t
hebabystart
edcryi
ngso
l
oudthatmmagweTumohur ri
edbackinsi
dewi t
h
Ronabehindher.Theygotinthebedr
oom wher e
Kennywasstaringatthebabycryi
ngonthefloor.
Ronaquickl
ypickedherup.
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Shef
ell
.”
“
Andwher
ewer
eyou?
”
“
Iwentt
othebat
hroom.
”
“
Leav
ingt
hem ont
hebedal
one?
”
“
SoIcan’tgotothebathr
oom anymor
e.Heel
arra
t
akeyourkidsandleav
e.Osimolagontenai
j
a.”
Ronashushedt hebabyasshecri
edwhi
lemmagwe
Tumol ookedatunbother
edKennywi
thnot
hingbut
shock.RonalookedatmmagweTumof edup.
“I
sitokifyoucomewithme?Wewi l
lfl
ybackto
Gabs.Iwil
lneedassi
stantwi
thcarr
yingthem i
nthe
pl
ane.Iwil
l gety
ouareturnf
li
ght
.”
MmagweTumosl
owl
ynodded.“
Iwi
l
lpackt
hei
r
t
hings.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Kenny
,comeher
e.”
Shewalkedoutwi
thher
.“Thi
sisnoty
ou.Youneed
hel
p.”
“Idon’
tneedanyhel
p.Iam f
ine.Lethi
mtakehi
s
kidsandgo.”
“
Youar
egoi
ngt
oregr
ett
hisKenei
l
we.
”
KennyslowlysatdownasmmagweTumowent
backtopackthechi l
dren’
sbags.Sheunl ockedher
phoneandsear chedacoupleoft hingsonthe
i
nternet
.Shet earful
lyr
eadthrought heresult
sthen
sear
chedf oranumberoni nternet.Shecopiedthe
numberandcal ledit
.
“Hel
l
o, mynameisKenei
l
weLaolang,
Ithi
nkIneed
hel
p.”Shepausedast
earsr
oll
eddownhercheeks.“
I
gavebi
rt
htomykidsyesterdayandIhatethem.Iam
scar
edIam goi
ngtohurtthem.Ievenfeel
suici
dal.
HowdoIgetadmit
ted?”
.
.
Thisi
sourmorni
nginser
t,l
et'
sli
keandcommentas
soonasweread,wehaveabonuswaiti
ng
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#83

RragweTumowal kedwi
thchat
tyQfr
om t
he
backyar
dwheretheyhadbeenwat
eri
ngmmagwe
Tumo’sflower
s.
“Soyouhavel
i
keal otofcows?Mygr anddadalso
havecowsandhorses.Hesaidhewoul dgiveme
onewhenIam ol
denought oride.Youknow, heis
cool
.Hehasgoatstooandchickens.Hegav emea
chi
ckenandagoat.Doy ouhavechickens?”
RragweTumosighedwonder
ingwhyhenev
erj
ust
keptqui
et.“
Yes.
”
“
Wil
lyougi
veme?
”
“
Modi
mont
huse!(
Godhel
pme!
)YesIwi
l
lgi
vey
ou.
”
“
OhhIcan’
twai
ttot
ell
mama.Youar
egoi
ngt
omi
ss
mamatoowhenwegowit
hherhome.
”
TheywalkedinsidethehousethenmmagweTumo
whowasst andingwi t
hthebabylookedather
husbandwithnot hi
ngbutdefeati
nhereyeswhil
e
Ronahel
dtheot
hertwo.Qrantothebedr
oom whi
l
e
rr
agweTumolookedathi
swife.
“
What
’swr
ong?
”
“
Kennysai
dshedoesn’
twantt
heki
ds.Shewant
sto
f
ocusonherl
if
e.”
“
What
?”
“
Gompi
enoKenei
l
weompei
l
ehat
shekamar
ago.
”
“
WhatDoesshemeanshewant
stof
ocusonher
l
i
fe?
”
“Gaket
se,kethabi
wakedi
thong.(
Idon’
tknow,
Iam
embarrassed.
)”
Ronasighedstar
ingather.“
Don’tf
eelembarrassed.
Youarenotresponsi
bleforKenny’
sdeci
sions.She
i
sagrownwomanwhoknowswhatshei sdoing.”

*
**

I
nt hebedroom Qlookedathi
smot
herl
yi
ngont
he
bed,eyesclosed.
“
Mama!
”
Kennysi
ghedopeni
ngherey
esandst
aredathi
m.
“Youar
eback.
”
“
Arewegoi
nghome?
”
“
No.Youar
egoi
ngwi
thdaddy
.Iam st
il
lsi
ck.
”
Qstoppedsmi
l
ing.“
Butwecant
akecar
eofy
ouat
home.”
“No.Ineedt
ost
ayher
ebuty
ouar
egoi
ngwi
tht
he
babies.
”
“
ButIwanty
out
oal
socomewi
th.
”
“
Quinton,
Iwi
llcomewhenIfeel
bet
ter
.Iam i
npain
r
ightnow.Gi
vi
ngbir
tht
othreebabi
esi
spainf
ul.
”
“
Iwantt
ost
aywi
thy
ou.
”
“
Youcan’
t.Youhav
etost
aywi
thdaddy
.”
“
Iam notgoi
ngwi
thouty
ou.
”
“
Youcan’
tst
ayher
e.Youhav
etogot
oschool
.”
Ql
ookedathercr
ying.“
Idon’
twantt
ogot
oschool
.”
“
Youhav
etogot
oschool
.”
Hecri
edevenl
ouder
.“Idon’
twantt
ogot
oschool
.I
wantt
ostaywi
thyou.
”
“Youcan’tst
aywi
thme.Iam notgoi
ngtor
epeatt
he
samethingagai
n.Whyareyoucryi
ng?Got
oyour
fat
her.
”
“
Youdon’
tli
keus.
”
“
YouaremakingmyheadacheQui
nton,
cany
ougo
t
oyourfat
her
? ”
“
Yousai
dyouwoul
dnev
erl
eav
e-“
“
Got
oyourf
ather
.”
Ronaopenedt
hedoorandwal
kedi
n.Ql
ookedat
hi
m cr
ying.
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Iwantt
ost
ayher
ewi
thmama.
”
“
Youhavetogot
oschool
.Let
’sgo.Mamawi
l
lcome
f
oryouguy
swhensheisr
eady.”
“
Idon’
twantt
ogo.Iwantt
ost
ayher
ewi
thher
.”
“
Qui
nton,
let
’sgo.
”
“Idon’
twantt
ogo.Iwantt
ost
aywi
thmama.Iam
stayi
ngher
ewithher
.”
Ronal
ookedatKennywhowasn’
tev
enshowi
ngany
emoti
on.
“Youwil
lcometovisi
ther
.Ri
ghtnowsheneedst
o
stayher
e.It
houghtwespokeaboutt
his.
”
Ronacr ouchedbef
orehisson.“
Iknowy ouaresad.I
knowy ouwantstaywithmamabecausey oumi ss
herbutwedi dtal
kaboutthi
s.Wearenotgoingwith
mamabecausesheneedst ohealfi
rst
.Sheisin
pai
n.”
Qreachedf
orherdr
ess.“
Iwantt
ost
ayher
ewi
th
her
.”
Kennysl
owl
ygotup.
“
Qui
nton,
letgo!
”
“
Iwantt
ost
aywi
thy
ou.
”
Losi
ngherpati
ence,
shepushedhim back.“Youar
e
notgoi
ngtostaywit
hme.Gowi t
hy ourfat
her.I
don’
tli
keyou,
leavemealone.
”
Hegotupandpul
l
edherhand,
Kennysmackedhi
s
head.“
Leav
eme!
”
Ronaangr
il
ylookedatfi
ght
ingnott
oputhi
shands
onheri
nfr
ontofhisson.
“
Dothatagai
nandIam goi
ngt
olocky
oui
nthi
s
r
oom andbeaty
ou.
”
Shelookedathi m andwalkedoutthenlocked
herselfi
nt hebat
hroom.RonapickedQashecr i
ed
andwal kedwithhimtothecarwher ethekidswere
i
nt heirbabyseatswhil
emmagweTumohel dt
he
other.Heputhim atthefr
ontseat.
“
Lookatme…”
“
Iwantmama.
”
“Yoursi bl
ingsarebehi ndyou.Youar egoingt olearn
tobeabi gbr ot
her,bigbrot
hersdon’ tcr
yf or
everything.Wheny oucr ywhataret heysupposedt o
do?Theyneedy out obeabi gbrothernotf oryouto
cry.Iknowy ouwantmamabutr ightnowt her ei
s
nothingIcando.Wewi l
lj
usthavet owaitt i
llsheis
readyf oryouguy s.Ok?Lookatt hem…t heylookup
toy ou.”
Qtur
nedbacktohi
ssibli
ngsandnoddedpressi
ng
hi
sli
pstoget
herwhi
letear
srol
leddownhischeeks.
“
Good.Sither
e,Iam coming.UhhmmagweTumo,
whatdi
dshecallthem?”
“Ihadtonamet hem becauseshewouldn’
tdoit
.You
canalwayschanget hei
rnames.Inamedthem
Sarona,t
hisone.”Shepoint
edattheoneshewas
holdi
ng.“Thenothergir
lisWaronaandtheboy
Larona.
”
Ronasmi l
ed.“Damn!Thatsoundsnice.Arona,
Sarona,WaronaandLarona.Il
ikei
t.Ithi
nkIwill
keepthosenames.”
MmagweTumosmiledthenRonawal
kedback
i
nsi
det
hehouseandknockedonthet
oil
et.
“Iam going.Iam taki
ngmyki dswi th.Hopeful
ly
wheny ouf i
nall
ysnapoutofi t,y
oucant hi
nkofy our
kids.IhopeonedayQal sof orgetswhathappened
today.Ihopeheheal sfr
om y ourreject
ion.Iam r
eall
y
hurtoverwhaty ousaidtodayandIknowi t’
sgoing
totaketimebutIknowonedayIwi l
lmov eonfrom
youandmeetawomanwhom Iwi l
lloveandshewi l
l
l
ovemetoo.Ial
sohopeyoufi
ndamanwhowi l
lbe
abl
etol
ovethewayyouneedtobel
oved.By
e.”
Hewait
edforaresponsebutshekeptqui
et.He
tur
nedandwal
kedoutt hengoti
nhiscaranddrov
e
off
.

*
**

Mothusibreat
hedheavil
yontopofhi
swif
ethen
ki
ssedherbeforeget
tingoff
.Nanaosmi
l
edstar
ing
atherri
ng.Shewasfinall
yawif
e.
“
HiMr
s.Ot
uki
l
e.”
Nanaosmi
l
ed.“
Hey
…”
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.Thanky
ouf
ort
hewonder
ful
day
.”
Mothusi
’
sphonerangt
henhereachedfori
tbeside
hi
m andanswer
edKenny’
scal
lwhileNanaofocused
onherri
ng.
“
Hel
l
o?”
Nanaosi
ghedhappi
l
yput
ti
ngherheadonMot
husi
’
s
chest
.
“
Hi,
Iam sor
ryf
orcal
l
ingsol
ate.
”
Nanaolookedathi
m cur
iousl
yashi
shear
tpounded
onherear.
“
It
’sok.
”
“UhhIbookedmyselfkoSbrana.Iam notf eel
ing
wellsoIhavet
ogot herebutIam i
npai n.Igav e
bir
thyest
erday
,Ican’tt
akethebus.Iwoul dask
someoneelsetotakemebutIam scar edt heyare
goingtoj
udgeme. ”
Mot
husil
ookedatNanaot
henki
ssedherandsi
ghed.
“
Ok,nopr
oblem.
”
“
Iam i
nRakops.
”
“
Ok,
ist
omor
rowok?
”
“
Yes.ButIhav
etol
eav
eear
lymor
ning.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
Hedroppedthecal
landputt
hephonedownwhi
l
e
Nanaolookedathi
m.
“
Whowasi
t?”
“Afr
iendofminewhowant edtocomef ort
he
wedding.Heissay
inghehadabr eakdownin
Rakopsandhasbeent her
eforacoupleofhour
s
now,helosthi
swallet
.”
“
Whi
chf
ri
end?
”
“
From hi
ghschool
.”
“
Youshoul
dhel
phi
m out
.Wecangot
oget
her
.”
“Babeitwi
ll
bedi
srespectf
uli
fwebothl
eav
e.Imight
arr
ivetomorr
owlat
emor ni
ng.I
maginemymother
wakinguptobot
hofusmi ssi
ng.”
“Igeti
t.I
t’
sok,goandgethi
m.Wher
ewashe
comingfrom?”
“
Jwaneng.
”
“Goandgethi
m.Ifhecouldcomeal
lthewayf
rom
Jwanengfory
ourwedding,t
heni
tmeansyour
fr
iendshi
pmeansalot
.”
“
Arey
ousur
e?Idon’
twantt
oleav
eyou.
”
Nanaosmi
l
ed.“
Goandgethi
m.”
“
Ok.
”Heki
ssedhert
hengotof
fbed.
Awhil
elat
erhegoti
nhi
scaranddr
oveof
fcal
l
ing
Kenny
.
“Hey,
Iam onmyway.Iwi
l
lsl
eepatalodget
hen
picky
ouuptomor
rowearl
ymorni
ng.
”
“
Ok.
”

*
**

Lat
erthatnight,Nametsotuckedint
heboysthen
wal
kedoutswi tchingofft
helight
s.Shewal
ked
i
nsi
deherr oom andclosedthedoorbehi
ndthensat
onthebedcal l
i
nghersi st
er.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Nametso…Ithoughty
ouwer
enotgoi
ngt
ocal
l
.Iam
i
nhospi
tal
.”
“
Doi
ngwhatt
her
e?”
“
Thebabyi
sher
e.”
Namest
ofr
owned.“
Whatbaby
?”
“
Iwaspr
egnant
.”
“
Youwer
ewhat
?”
“Iwaspr
egnant
.Iam goi
ngt
ogi
vebi
rt
h.Iam i
n
pain.
”
“
Anot
herbaby
?”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“No,Ican’tdothisanymore.Youkeephavi
ngbabies
wheny ouseet hatthi
ngsarehard.What
’swrong
wit
hy ou.NotonlydoIpr ovi
deforyoubutyourchi
ld,
nowanot herone? ”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“Idon’
tcare,
youcanhave100nki dsifyouwantbut
makeapl anonhowt osupportt
hem.Andst op
makingmybr ot
herbabysi
tyourkids.Makeaplan,
youkeeppoppingoutbabiessoyouar egrown
enoughtomakeplansnow. ”
Namet
soangr
il
yhungup.

*
**

I
nthesi
tti
ngroom,
Maat l
asatwit
hBofel
oasthey
bot
hwatchedamovie.Heswit
chedof
ftheTVand
l
ookedather
.
“Namet sotoldmewhaty outoldher.Idon’tli
keyour
atti
tudetowardsher,Namet soisnotjustahel per
here,shefarmorethant hatandy ouar egoingto
respecther.Youdon’
tpayherbecausey oudidn’t
empl oyherther
efor
ei t
s’noty ourbusinesstotellher
whatshecanandcan’ tdo.Shewi ll
cleanmy
bedroom, washmycl othes,cookformeanddo
everythi
ngthatshehasbeendoi ng.
”
“
I-
“
“Iam notdone.Iwanty outostopgivi
ngSapphir
e
fal
sehope.Honest l
yIdon’tthi
nky ouandIwil
lever
betogether.IusedtoloveyoubutIhavenowmov ed
onfrom thatsoplease,st
opgivingherfal
sehope.
Youarehereasavisi
tor
,youaregoingt oleav
ei n
twoweeks.Youarenotmygirl
fri
end, y
ouar ejusta
babymama.IfIhearanymorecompl aintsaboutyou,
youar
egoingtogobackt oyourmot her’
shouse.”
“
Maat
la-
“
“Lastbutnotleast,
Iwantmyson.Iwantt ostaywith
allmykids,y
ouwi llgethim andSapphir
eduring
holi
days.Myki dsareallgoi
ngt ostayunderoneroof.
Don’tmakemet akey outocourt.
”
“
Ok.Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Good.Goodni
ght
.”
Het ookhisjuiceandwal kedtohi sbedroom.Bof el
o
satstil
lforawhi l
ecryingsi l
entlythenfinall
ystood
upandwal kedtoherr oom.Shel aiddownf orawhi l
e,
nowt hatshet houghtofi t,t
hismanwasdeal i
ngwi t
h
l
osinghi swife,ofcausehewasst ressed.He
probablydidn’tmeanal lthathesai d.Shesmi l
ed
thoughtful
lyandwal kedoutgoi ngtohisr oom then
frownedpassi ngNamet so’sroom.Shecoul dhear
hisvoice,i
twasl owandi naudiblebutitwashi m.
Shewai tedforawhi l
et henf i
nallyheardsof tmoans
f
rom t
heroom.Shetear
full
ywentbacktot
heguest
r
oom whereshesatonthebedcry
ing.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#84

Yaonewal kedi
nsideMotsamai RealEstatefr
om an
i
nterv
iewatanothercompanyi nherpurplesuitand
bl
ackheels.Shegotinthel
if
twhi chtookhertot he
l
astfl
oorthenshesteppedoutgoi ngtoherdesk.
Shesatdownanswer i
ngherringingphone.
“
Mr.Mot
samai
,goodmor
ning.
”
“Isentyouali
stofthi
ngsIneedatmyhousethis
mor ni
ng,pl
easegetthem.Thecompanydr
iverwil
l
driv
ey ou”
“
Yessi
r.
”
Shehungupopeni nghermessagest henl
ookedat
theli
stfi
gur
ingKennyhadgivenbirthbutl
ookingat
theli
stshecouldn’
tseeanyt
hingthatcoul
dpossibl
y
beforKenny.Shestooduptakingherbagsand
walkedtowardstheelev
ator
.Acolleaguegoti
nwi t
h
her.
“
Hey
…”
“
Hi.
”
“Iwast
hinki
ngmay
bewecangooutf
ordi
nner
someti
me.”
Theel
evatoropenedt
henshest
eppedout .“
Iam
sor
rybutIdon’
tdateatwor
kbutthanks.
”

*
**

Namet sost
ooddancedt oanaer obicsvi
deoon
YouTubeplayi
ngont hesmar tTVwhi l
ebreat
hing
heavi
ly.Bof
elowalkedinfrom herroom and
watchedherasshesweat edmov ing.Shesatdown
andwai t
edti
llshewasdone.
“
CanIt
alkt
oyou?
”
Namet
sonodded.
“
Sit
.Wear
egoi
ngt
otal
kwomant
owoman.
”
Shesatdownst
ari
ngatBof
elo.
“
Iknowyouaresl
eepi
ngwit
hMaatl
annaka.Heisa
manaft
eral
landi
t’
sinhi
snatur
etohav
enoticed
youespeci all
ywheny ouhavebeent aki
ngcareof
him andhi skidsthewayy ouhav ebeenbutpl ease
understandme.Thi smanandIhav ekidstogether.
Two, unfortunatel
ywel osttheotherone.Iwantt o
fi
xmyf amily.Iwantmyki dstogr owupi nastable
home.Keagokope, (
Iam beggingyou,)giv
emet he
chancet opul lmyfami l
ytogether
.Ihavelovedt hi
s
manf ory earsnow.Keagokopannaka.Mphe
sebakakebankany elelwapalame. ”
Namet
sol
ookedathersi
l
ent
ly.
“
Howmuchdoy
ouwant
?”
“
What
?”
“Howmuchdoyouwant?Foryoutoleavethi
shouse,
howmuchdoyouwant?Ihaveaplot,Icansel
lit
andgi
veyoual
lthemoneyfr
om theplot.I
twil
lbe
moret
han100k.
”
Namet solookedatherthoughtfull
y,shecoulddoa
l
otwith100k.Shecoul dextendhermot her
’shouse
andact ual
lymakeitl
ookbeaut i
ful.Shecouldeven
star
tasmal l
busi
nesssincefindingaj obwas
provi
ngt obediff
icul
t.Butt
henagai n,shewas
begi
nni
ngtofal
li
nlovewit
ht hi
sman.Shet
ookher
phoneandpr
esseditr
ecr
ding.
“Whatdoy
ousay
?Wewi
l
lhav
easi
gned
agr
eement.
”
“
Youwi
l
lgi
veme100kt
ost
ayawayf
rom hi
m?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Ok.
”
Bof
elosmi
l
ed.“
Iam gl
adwear
emaki
ngpr
ogr
ess.
”
“
Sowhenar
eyousel
l
ingt
hepl
ot?
”
“
Iam put
ti
ngi
tupf
orsal
enow.
”

*
**

Esi
viewedahouset
hensmi
l
edt
urni
ngbackt
othe
l
andlor
d.
“
Ilov
eit
.”
Thelandlor
dsmiled.“
Iam glad.Ev
eryt
hingisi
ngood
condit
ion,t
hehousegotfi
nishedfivemonthsback
thenImov edi
nbutnowIhavebeent
ransf
err
edt
o
Franci
stownsoIam l
eav
ing.
”
“
It
’sbeaut
if
ul.Il
i
kei
t.
”
“
Andt
her
ent
?”
“
Therentisfi
ne.Ij
ustl
ovethatital
sohasapool
and
i
t’
sreal
lybig,
Ihavetwosons.”
“Ohht hat
’sni
ce,nowIam sur et
heywi
llt
rulyloveit
.I
am alsoconsider
ingtoselli
tinsometi
mesoIam
tel
li
ngy oufi
rst.I
thasar eal
lybi
gbackyard,another
housecanbebui ltt
here.
”
“
Isee.Sohowmuchwi
l
lyoubesel
l
ingi
t?”
Thel
andl
ordlaughed.“Iwi
l
lsendy
ouev
ery
thi
ngon
what
sapp.Butit
’snotbad.
”
“
Wai
i
,youGabsf
olksar
ever
yexpensi
ve.
”
Theybothlaughed.“
Everyt
hingi
nthi
sci
tyi
sjust
expensi
ve.ButIam tel
l
ingyou,i
t’
saf
for
dabl
e.So
wheredoy ouwork?”
“Ihaven’
tbeenwor
kingl
atel
y,Iwasdeal
i
ngwit
hmy
divor
cebutIgotaj
oblastweekatabank.”
“That’
snice.Ei
sh,wheny outal
kaboutdivorceyou
makemescar ed.HubbyandIhav ebeenhav i
ng
troubl
eebileketsogi
legoremothoot l
il
egosal aa
febannakei l
eFranci
town.(Iam evenscaredthathe
i
sgoi ngtoremainwhoringwhil
eIam in
Francist
own.”
“NnammaIdon’ tthi
nkIwouldwantt
ogetmar ri
ed
againaf
terthis.Inev
erexpect
edtobehurttheway
thatsol
dierhurtme.Kanawhentheyhur
ty ou,t
hey
makesur e.
”
“
Butnotev
erymanwi
l
lbel
i
key
ouex.
”
“
IknowbutIdon’
twantt
ogetmar
ri
ed.Notnow.
”
Theywalkedoutchat
ti
ng.Esi
’
sphoner
angt
henshe
pi
cked.
“
Hey
…”
“
Heybabe,
hav
eyouseent
hehouse?
”
“
Ng…Il
i
kei
t.I
t’
sbeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Ohok.
”
“
Whenar
eyoucomi
ngback?
”
Seanl
aughed.“
Iwi
l
lbewi
thy
out
oni
ght
.”
“
Ok,
letmesor
toutt
hepay
ment
s.”
“
Ok.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Shehungupthentransf
erredther
entmoney
i
ncludi
ngdeposi
ttothelandlor
d.
“
Ther
e…”
Thel
andlordhandedhert
hehousekey
s.“
Ok,
Iguess
wewil
ltalk.
”
“
Yes.Thanky
ousomuch.
”
Thelandl
ordgoti
nhercarwhi
leEsi
unlockedthe
RangeRoverandj
umpedinreadi
ngatextfrom
Kenny.
Kenny
: Hey
,incaseyoutr
ytogethol
dofme,
Iwi
l
lbe
goneforawhil
e.GotajobNamibi
a.
Shefr
ownedthent
riedcal
li
ngherbackbutt
he
numberwasn’
tgoi
ngthroughany
mor e.
*
**

Yaonesteppedoutoft hecompany’
scarhol di
ng
pl
astics,
sheputsomedownt henknockedont he
door.Secondslat
erAmberopened.Yaonel ookedat
herbumpt hatstr
etchedouthermater
nitydress.
“
Hi.
.”
“
Hi,
Mr.Mot
samai
askedmet
ogett
heset
hings.
”
“
Comei
n.”
Yaonepi
ckedt hepl
asti
csandwal
kedi
nsi
dethe
housewhereanelderl
ywomansatont
hecouch,her
handsonherlap.
“
Dumel
ang.
”
Ronawal
kedf
rom t
hebedr
oom.
“
Hey
,yougott
hem?
”
“
Yessi
r.
”
Ronatooktheplast
icsandhandedt
hem t
oAmber
.
Yaonelookedathimthensmil
ed.
“
Ihav
etogobackt
owor
k.”
“Wai
t…uhcouldyoutellt
hedr
ivert
odri
vemmagwe
Tumototheair
portandAmbertoherhouse.Iwant
tot
alkt
oy ousodon’tgo.
.”
“
Uhy
essi
r.
”
Yaonewal
kedoutf
oll
owedbyAmberandt
heel
der
ly
woman.
“Mike,
Mr.Motsami
sayst
akeAmbert
oherhouse
aft
eryoutakemmagweTumoher
etotheai
rpor
t.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shewalkedi
nsidethehouseasmmagweTumo
st
aredathergett
ingi
nthecar.

*
**

I
nsi
det
hehouse,
Ronacal
l
edhi
smot
heragai
n.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Mama,
didy
ougetmymessagel
astni
ght
?”
“Ei
shnomyson,
Ifel
lyest
erdayandmyl
egi
s
pai
nful
.”
“
What
?”
“
Yes,Ican’
tev
enwal
k.Theyar
egoi
ngt
orunsome
t
est
s.”
“
Whydi
dn’
tpapat
ell
me?
”
“
Ital
lhappenedqui
ckl
y,whatwer
eyousay
ing?
”
“
Kenei
l
wegav
ebi
rt
htot
winsy
est
erday
.”
“
Twi
ns?
!”
“Yes,butIdon’tknowwhat’
sgoingon,shesaysshe
want stofocusonherli
fenott
hebabies.Ineed
assistance.
”
“Iam begi
nningtodi
sli
kethi
sgir
l.Koorewhatki
nd
ofamot hersayssomethi
ngli
kethat?”
“Iam notgoingtoforcehert
olov
emyki
ds,
she
hatesthem clear
ly.
”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evet
hisi
swhaty
oupai
dmagadi
for
.”
“
Nowwhatam Igoi
ngt
odowheny
ouar
enotf
eel
i
ng
wel
l
?”
“
Icant
alkt
oyouraunt
-“
“
Ngng,Idon’
twantthatper
soni
nmyhouse.Iwi
l
l
f
indsomeone.I
t’
sok.”
“
WhataboutKenny
’sr
elat
ives?Wher
ear
ethey
?”
“Hergrandmother’
ssist
erin-
lawwhohadbeen
hel
pingcan’thandleal
lthr
eebabi
esalone.Her
husband’sheal
thisnotlooki
ngwell
soshecan’t
l
eavehi mtoassistme.”
“
It
’sti
mewegeti nvol
vedasafamil
y.Iam begi
nni
ng
t
ohatethi
sgirl
.Kooreshecan’
tbehavel
ikea
mother
,whatki
ndofawomani sshe?”
“Idon’twantt
otalkaboutKennymama,Ij
ustwanta
solut
ion.Letmetalktoafewpeopl
e.”
“Ok,butbecareful
whenhi r
ingsomeonef
oryour
kids,getsomeoneolderandwhohasexperi
ence
withbabies.WhydidIhavetofal
l?
”
“
Don’
tst
ressy
our
sel
f,Iwi
l
lgetbackt
oyou.
”
Hehungupj ustasYaonewalkedi
n.Helookedat
herabouttosaysomethi
ngthenoneoft hebabies
star
tedcry
ing.Hewenttohi
sr oom andgotSarona.
Hewal kedbackwit
hherandtookt
hebot
tlef
rom
thekit
chen.Hesatdownfeedi
nghi
mjustasLar
ona
star
tedcryi
ng.
“
Canyougoandt
akeLar
onabef
orehewakesup
Wawa.
”
Yaoneputdownherbagandwentt
ohi
sbedr
oom
whereshecamebackwit
hhim.
“
Youhav
etr
ipl
ets?
”
“
Yes.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Wow!
”
“
Herbot
tl
eisi
ntheki
tchen.
”
“
Ok.
”
Yaonewenttotheki
tchenandt ookhi
sbottl
ethen
satbesi
deRonafeedi
nghisotherdaughter
.She
l
ookedatherfacesmil
ingatthecutenesst
hen
l
ookedattheonehewashol ding.
“
Theyar
enoti
dent
ical
?”
“
Yah.
”
“
Wow!Wher
eisKe-
…Ms.Laol
ang?
”
“
Idon’
tknow.
”
Yaonelookedathim noti
cingt
hestr
essli
nesonhis
for
ehead.Whateverthathadtobebother
inghi
m had
tobeseri
ous.
“
Isawy
ouremai
l
,youar
equi
tt
ing?
”
Sheswall
owed.“
Iuhh…Isawajobthatact
uall
y
neededmyquali
fi
cat
ionandt
heycall
edmef oran
i
ntervi
ew.
”
“That
’sni
ce,alotofpeopl
edr
eam f
orsuch
opport
uni
ti
es.”
“
Yeah…”
“
Goodl
uck,
sowhenar
eyoul
eav
ing?
”
“
Ify
oui
ncr
easemysal
aryIwon’
tgo.
”
Ronalookedatherandchuckl
edweakl
y.“
Otl
etse
bohema.”
“
Iwentf
ort
hei
nter
view,
Idon’
tthi
nkIgoti
t.
”
“
Youshoul
dn’
tbenegat
ive.May
bey
ougoti
t.
”
Sheshookherhead.“
No,
Iknowwhogothir
ed.I
sit
tool
atetot
akebackmyresi
gnat
ionr
equest
?”
“
Apr
ilal
readygoty
ourr
epl
acement
.”
Yaone’
sfacedr
opped.“
Soqui
ck?
”
Ronalookedbackathi sdaughter.“Nextt
imey ou
don’
tsendy ourresi
gnati
onlett
erbef orey
ougett he
j
ob,youwi l
ll
oseonbot hendsandy ouwillbecome
unemployed.Isentheryouremail andshesentitto
HR,theyarealr
eadydoinginter
v i
ews.”
Yaonelookedatt
hebabywhowassleepi
ngthengot
upandwentt ol
ayhi
m down.Shecamebackthen
tooktheonehewasholdi
ngandwentbackt
ohis
bedroom wit
hher
.
Shefi
nal
lystoodinfr
ontofhi
m.“ButIonl
ysentthat
l
astni
ght,t
hereisnowayshecouldhavefound
someonebynow. ”
“
Shei
slooki
ng.
”
“Iam notgi
vi
ngupmyjobbecauseofami
stake.I
am goodatwhatIdo,
youknowthat.
”
“Ineedsomeonerel
iabl
eYaone,notsomeonewho
canwakeupt omorr
owt hi
nki
ngaboutquit
ti
ng.Iam
taki
ngthreemont
hswor ki
ngfrom home,
whatifyou
wakeuptomorrowanddeci
dey ouwanttoquityour
j
obbysendingmeanemai l
attheti
meIr eal
lyneed
youatt
heoffi
ce?Youmustthi
nkIam runningaplay
cent
er.
”
“Iam sor
ry.WhatIdi
dwasunpr
ofessi
onal
.Itwi
l
l
neverhappenagai
n.”
“
Itwon’
tbecausey
ouar
enol
ongerwor
kingf
orme.
”
“
Youareangr ybutyourangeri
sdirect
edatthe
wrongperson.Iam sor
ryforqui
tt
ingthroughemai
l
.
I
twon’thappenagain.”
“
Nextt
imeIwon’
tbeso-
“
Shesmi
l
edr
eli
eved.“
Yessi
r.I
twon’
thappenagai
n.”
“Ineedahel per.Someonet ohelpmewi tht hekids,
Ambercan’ tdoi tany more.Sheisheavil
ypr egnant.
Mymot herhur ther sel
f.Ineedsomeoner eli
ableto
helpwiththeki ds.Someonewi thexperi
ence.
SomeoneIcant rustwithmyki dsthoughf orthe
foll
owingt hreemont hsIwi l
lbewor ki
ngfrom home
becauset heyal soneedmyat t
ention.
”
Shel
ookedathi
m andnoddedwi
thabr
ightsmi
l
e.
“
Yessi
r.
”
“
Mxm,
getoutofmyhouse.
”
Shel
aughed.“
Hav
eyoueat
eny
et?
”
Her
eachedf
orhi
sphone.
“GetoutofmyhouseYaone.Got
owor
kbef
oreI
actual
l
yfir
eyou.
”
Shel
aughedget
ti
ngherbagandwal
kedout
.

*
**

Lat
erthatday
,Mothusi
parkedt
hecaratSbrana
Psychi
atr
icHospi
tal
parki
ngandlookedather
.
“
Soar
eyousur
e?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Don’
tyout
hinky
ouneedt
otel
lsomeone?
”
“Idon’twanttobejudged.Idon’
twantt
obel
abel
ed.
Iwill
deal wi
thitaf
terIgethelp.
”
“
Ihopei
twon’
tbet
ool
ate.
”
Kennylookedathi
mt henshruggedtearf
ull
y.
.“Ineed
help.Byt
heway ,
congrat
ulat
ions.Iam happyfor
you.”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Thanks.Shoul
dwego?
”
“
Yes.
”
Hegotoutofthecargoi
ngt
oherdoorandhel
ped
heroutt
hent
ookherbagandwal
kedwithheri
nsi
de.

THREEMONTHSLATER
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#85

Thr
eeMont
hsLat
er.
..

Qbithisl
owerli
ppi
cki
ngthecr
yingbabyfr
om t
he
mattr
esswherehewaslyi
ngi
nthesit
ti
ngroom and
st
aggeredbacktot
hecouchal
mostfall
i
nghol
ding
hi
m.
“
Shhhy
ouwantmi
l
k?”
Heplacedhim onthecor nerofthecouchsit
ti
ng
thenwenttothekitchenwher ehestoodonhistoes
andgotthebottl
eofmi lk.Hewentbackwi thi
tto
thesi
tt
ingroom wher eLaronahadfall
enandwas
nowlyi
ngonhi ssideont hecouchcrying.
“
Lar
ry,
don’
tcr
y.Iwi
l
lgi
vey
oumi
l
k.”
Heputthebottl
eofmi l
kbesidehi
m si
tti
ngthen
pull
edhi
sy oungerbr
otheronhisl
apthenstart
ed
feedi
nghi
m.Hef r
ownedatthesmellthatwas
comingfr
om hispants.
“
Youpooed.
”
Larryki
ckedhist
inyl
egsi
ntheairst
ari
ngathis
olderbr
otherashemadeafunnyfacei
ndisgust
.
“
Youar
esmel
l
ingl
i
kepoo.
”
Heputt hebottledownt henlaidLarryonthecouch
andrushedt otri
plet
’sroom wher ehecameback
withanotherdiaperandt heboxofwi pers.Hepull
ed
outhisbrother’
sshorts.Thebabyki ckedhislegsi
n
theairsuckinghisfi
sttryingtoturnonhisside.Q
undidhisdiaperandf r
owned.
“
Thisi
slotofpoo.St
ayst
il
l.Letme…”Hewipedhis
l
i
ttl
edi
ckcov er
edinhi
spoot hent
ookof
fthediaper
.
Hepausedput
ti
nghi
shandoverhi
snose.“
Thi
sis
smel
li
ng.Whatar
eyoueat
ing?
”
Poostai
nedthecouchesasQr eachedforthewi per
s
andstar
tedwipi
ngthebaby.Secondslaterhelooked
athi
shandscoveredint
hebaby ’
spoot henpicked
hi
m upandwentwi t
hhimtot hebathr
oom andl aid
hi
m onthefl
oor.
“
Iam goi
ngt
owashy
ou.Li
est
il
l.
”
Heopenedt hetapsint hebat htubput tinghi shand
onwat ert
ocheckf orthet emper ature.Hef inally
pi
ckedLar r
ywhowasbegi nningt ocr ythencl imbed
wit
hwi thhi
mt hetubandhel dhi sbut tundert he
warm waterwashinghim.Qcl osedt hewat erthen
walkedoutwithhisbrot herbot hdrippingwett hen
wentbackt othesi
tti
ngr oom.Hel aidhi m ont he
cl
eancouchandwentov ert
ot heot hercouchwhi ch
wasstainedthenhepickedt hecl eandi aper .
Lar
ryr
oll
edont hecouchandfel
lonthefl
oor
.Ther
e
wasabitofsi
lencebefor
ehestart
edcry
ingsol
oud
hi
scri
esstart
ledSaronaandWaronawhowere
sl
eepi
ng.
Qrushedbacktohim andpickedhi
m upbr
eat
hing
heavi
l
y.“Shhdon’
tcry.Sor
ry.”
Laronacri
edev enlouder
,Qwalkedwithtot
hebottl
e
thensatont hefl
oorandstar
tedfeedi
nghim whi
l
e
hisli
pbled.Laronacri
edmovinghishead.

*
**
Outsi
de,thenannypausedt al
ki
ngont hephone
l
ist
eningtothecri
esfrom insi
dethenhurri
edinside.
Herjawsdroppedasshel ookedatthemessi nthe
housejustasMr.Motsami ’
scardrovein.All
thekids
werenowcr yi
ngsheev enfoundithar
dt othi
nk.
“
OhLor
d!Whathappened?
”
“
Iwant
edt
ochangehi
sdi
aper
.”
Shewal kedoverandtookLarrywho’
sli
pwas
bleedingwhil
eherheartpoundedsomuch.Mr.
Mot samaiwalkedint
henf r
ozeatthedoorst
ari
ngat
themesst oo.
“
Whatt
hehel
lhappened?
”
Shelookedathim shaking.“
Thet ri
plet
swereall
sl
eeping,myphoner angsoIt houghtIwouldanswer
i
toutsidesothatIdon’tmakenoi seforthem,Iwas
onl
ygonef orl
essthanf iveminutesIswear.”
“Hestar
tedcr
yingandhi
sdi
aperwassmel
l
ingsoI
changedhim.
”
“Ipayyoutolookaft
ermykidsnotf
ory
outowalk
outleavi
ngthem al
oneandhaveQdoyourj
ob.
.”
“Iam sosor
ryMr
.Mot
samai
,i
twi
l
lnev
erhappen
agai
n.”
“
Itshoul
dnothav
ehappenedi
nthef
ir
stpl
ace!
”
Shelookedatt hebabyasheshout
ed.Shehadnever
seenhim shoutthoughsheal
waysfear
edhim and
nowshewasj ustscar
ed.
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
Ronal
ookedatLar
ry’
sbl
eedi
ngmout
h.
“
Dresshi
m soIcant
akehi
mtot
hehospi
tal
.”
“
Yessi
r.
”
Wazhaquicklyrushedwi t
hhimt ot hechildren’
s
room wher
eshecl eanedthebloodt houghi twassti
ll
comingout.Shechangedhi swetcl othes.Shecame
backminuteslaterandfoundhi m holdingthegirl
s
whower enowsl eepinginhisarms.Hepl acedthem
downandt ookhisson.
“
Iam comi
ng.Tr
ytokeept
hem saf
e.”
Sheswal
l
owed.“
Yessi
r.
”
“
DaddycanIcome?
”
RonalookedatQasher
ushedf
rom hi
sroom
changedtoo.
“
Yahsur
e.”
Wazhaputherhandsonherfacetearf
ull
yasthey
wal
ked,shecoul
dalreadyf
eeli
t,shewasgoingtobe
f
ir
ed.Sheslowl
ysatdownont hecleancouch
wonder
ingwhyshehadchosent oanswerthatcal
l
.

*
**

Atthehospit
al,
Ronawatchedasthenurseat
tended
tohisson.Shesmil
edatthem t
aki
ngoffherglov
es.
“Heisgoi
ngtobefi
ne,
hejustbur
sthi
sli
p.”She
handedhi
m backwi
thasmile.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Shesmiled.“
Yourki
dsl
ookli
keyouwait
se,
Ifeel
sorr
yforthei
rmom.Imagi
negiv
ingbi
rt
htophoto
copi
es.”
Ronasmi
l
ed.“
Thi
sist
oshowt
hatt
heyar
emi
ne.
”
ShelookedatQ.“
Heyboyboy
!Yourbot
heri
sgoi
ng
tobefine.
”
Qsmil
ed.“
Theyar
etr
ipl
ets.Twoot
her
sar
eat
home.
”
“
Ohwow!Real
l
y?”
“
Yes.Theyar
egi
rl
s.”
“That’
sawesome!Iwi
shIwasy
ou.Mustf
eel
nice
beinganol
derbrot
her
.”
“
Yeah,
Itr
iedt
ochangehi
sdi
aperbutt
henhef
ell
.”
Thenursel
aughed.“
Cut
e.Nextt
imej
ustcal
lmama
todoit
.”
“Mamadoesn’
tst
aywi
thusbecauseshedoesn’
tli
ke
usany
more.”
“
Q!”
Qlookedathi
sfat
hert
henkeptquiet
.Thenurse
smil
edandtookoutasweetf
rom herpocket
.
“
Take,
youar
eawesome.
”
Qsmi
l
edexci
tedl
ytaki
ngt
hel
oll
i
pop
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Youar
ewelcomesweet
y.”Shel
ookedathi
sfat
her
.
“
Youar
egoodtogo.
”
“Thankyou.
”Helookedathert
agandsmi
l
ed.“
E.
Boikhut
so,what
’st
heEf or
?”
Shesmil
ed.“
Emang.TakeLar
ryhome,
heneedst
o
rest
.By
eQ!ByQ’sdad.
”
Ronagotupandwal kedoutwit
hhissonsasanot
her
pati
entwalkedi
n.Shesmiledwit
hthesameposit
ive
energyshecarr
iedar
ound.
“
Hi,
sitdown.
”

*
**

Esipar
kedthecarasMaatl
a’
sgatethensteppedout
di
ali
nghim.Thephonerangforawhil
ethenhe
answered.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hi,
Iam her
efort
heki
ds.
”
“
Iam onmywaybackf
rom at
ri
p,r
ingt
hei
nter
com.
Nametsoi
sther
e.”
“
Ok.
”
Shehungupt
henpr
essedt
hei
nter
com.
“
Who’
sther
e?”
“
It
’sMoesi.MmagweKagol
eLet
habo,
pleaseopen
t
hegate.
”
Thegat eopenedthenshewal kedintheyardgoing
tothehouset hatshehadstayedinforyearsbutthe
courthadsaidhewoul dkeepitashegotcust odyof
thekids.Sheknockedont hedoorwithasight hen
thedooropenedandNamet sowalkedout .
“
Hi.
”
“
Iam her
eformyki
ds.
”
“Ok,t
heyar
eput
ti
ngont
hei
rshoes.Her
ear
ethei
r
bags.
”
Nametsohandedhert
hebags.“
Ever
ythi
ngi
sin
t
here.
”
“
Ok.Ar
eyout
henannyorhi
sgi
rl
fr
iend?Iam abi
t
conf
used.
”
“
Iam t
henanny
.”
“Ok.Thanky ouforhel
pingwiththeki ds,
Iknowt hey
areal otofworkandy ouprobablygetpaidfori
tbut
thanky ou.Theyarefi
tandhealthyallbecauseof
you.IfitwasMaat l
aaloneIcouldhav efoundthem
l
ookingl i
keskelet
onsorlookingsof atbecauseene
hankeaapay a.
”
Namet
sol
aughed.“
Ifoundt
hem eat
ingt
ake-
away
s.”
“
Iknewi
tsot
hanky
ou.Youar
edoi
ngagoodj
ob.
”
Namet sosmi l
ed,shehadexpect edanangr ybit
ter
womant hefi
rstti
meshesawherbuti tt
urnedout
shewast heopposit
eoft hat.Hereshewas, st
ari
ng
atthemostf ri
endlyhumanev erandshekept
smili
ngathermaki ngthingsl essawkward.Outof
everyweekendshepi ckedt heboys,shenevergave
anyattit
ude.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“Soyoualsot
akecar
eofboSapphi
rekana
gatweng?
”
“
Eemmabutt
heyal
sowentt
othei
rmot
her
.”
“
Ohok.
”
Theboy
sst
eppedoutt
henhuggedt
hei
rmot
her
.
“
Heyguy
s!”
Kagosmil
edexcit
edl
y.“
Ist
hatguyst
il
lther
e?Hehas
real
l
ycoolgames.
”
Esil
aughed.“Gat
wet hatguy,l
onakana,hi
snamei
s
Sean,gotothecar.Takeyourbagtothecar.
”
Theypickedthei
rbagsandhurr
iedt
otheRange
Rover
.Esi smil
edatNametso.
“
Thanky
ouagai
n.”
“
Youar
ewel
come.
”
“Bytheway,ItoldMaatlatwomont hsbackt hatI
alsowanttocont r
ibut
etoy oursalarybuther ef
used
soIam justgoingtodoi twhetherhelikesitorhe
doesn’
t.Iwil
lputanext r
aP2Kont opofy oursalar
y.”
“
Thanky
ousomuch.
”
“
Bye!
”
Shewal
kedbackt
ohercaranddr
oveof
f.

*
**

Laterthateveni
ng, Yaonecar ef
ullydidthefi
nal
touchupst ohermake- upthenr ubbedherl i
ps
togetherandstoodup.Shel ookedather sel
finthe
shortdressthatreachedhermi dt hi
ghsexposingher
yell
owl egsthenshespr ayedabi tofherper
fume.
Shepi ckedherhandbagandwal kedoutinherlong
heelsthenwenttohercabt hatwaswai ti
ngforher
outsi
de.Shegoti nthenittookherst rai
ghtto
Rona’shouse.
Shehadt ri
edtoholditbutthelongerKennywasn’t
there,
themor eshegotconv i
ncedthattheyhad
brokenup.Henev erment i
onedhernameany more,
hehadst oppedallthethi
ngsheusedt odoforher.
Thecarpar kedinfr
ontofRona’sgatethenshe
steppedoutafterpayinghi
m.Sheswal l
owedand
call
edRona.
“
Yaone.Shoul
dn’
tyoubesl
eepi
ng?
”
“Iam atthegat
e,Ineedt
otal
ktoy
ouabout
somet hi
ng.”
“
Whati
sit
?”
“
Pleaseopen.
”
Thegateopenedthenshewalkedingoi
ngt ot
he
door.Sheopenedandwalkedin,
Ronalookedather
wit
haf rown.
“
Whati
sit
?”
Shewalkedfurt
heri
ncl
osingt
hedoorbehi
ndher
andstoodbeforehi
minherdr
essl
ookingand
smell
i
nggorgeous.
“
Whati
sit
?”
“Uh…”Sheunzi ppedhersidezi
pt hentookof
fthe
dressremaininginherredg-st
ri
ngandr edbra.She
gotclosert
ohi m andtouchedhisdickwitha
naughtysmile.Ronamov edback.
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ng?
”
“
Whatpeopl
edon’tknowdon’
thav
etohur
tany
one.I
wanty
outofuckme.Iknowyouwantme.
”
“Whathappenedi nKasanewasabi gmi st
akeand
onethatwi l
l nev erhappenagai n.Ididn’teven
mentionitforar eason.Youar et ooy oungforme
andIam wayol derthany ou.Iactuallydon’twant
youandInev erdi djustthatyoucaughtmei naweak
moment .Ev eni fIhadsl eptwit
hy outhatnight,i
t
wouldhav ejustbeenagr avemi stake,onet hatI
wouldhav elivedt oregretforther estofmyl i
fe.
Leavemyhouse, Iam yourboss, respectthatandif
youcan’t,youknowt hewayout .Getdressedand
getout.Youar eembar rassingy ourself
.”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#86

Yaonecal
l
edhercabwal
ki
ngoutoft
hegat
e,t
ear
s
i
tchi
ngherey
es.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey,pl
easecomebackandgetme.Iam att
hegat
e
wher
eyoulef
tmeat.”
“
Eemma.Youcanwai
tther
e,l
uckyf
ory
ouIam t
he
t
uckshopnear
by.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shestoodbyhisgate,nowtheembarrassment
mixedwiththehurtmadeherbl
inkacoupleofti
mes
tr
yingtokeeptear
saway .Shet
urnedbacktothe
houseandlookedaway .
Herheartskippedasshesawt woboyswal
kingover
fr
om theotherdirect
ionthenshemov
edclosert
o
gatet
henr eadybangi t
.
Hercabguypul
l
edov
er,
wit
hrel
i
ef,
shequi
ckl
ygoti
n.
“
Iam sor
ryf
oral
lthi
s,Iwi
l
lpayy
ou.
”
“
It
’sok.Hadyoustoodt
hereformoreseconds,
t
hosethugscoul
dhaverobbedyou.
”
Shel
ookedatt
het
woguy
sthensi
ghed.
“
Yah…”
Sheleanedbackontheseat,Rona’swor
dsplay
ing
overandoverinherheadthatatearr
andown.The
cabdriv
erlookedatherandhandedherawiper
.
“
Taket
his.I
t’
sokt
ocr
y,i
shecheat
ing?
”
Sheshookherheadt
aki
ngt
hewi
per
.
“
Iam sorr
yforwhat
everi
tist
haty
ouar
egoi
ng
t
hrough.
”
“
Thanks.
”
Thecabdr
iverpar
kedi
nfr
ontofherhouseawhi
l
e
l
ater
.
“
Youcanpaymehal
f.
”
“
Thanky
ouReba.
”
“
Sur
e.”
Shegavehimt hemoneyandwalkedinsideher
housewhil
ehet ookoff
.Yaonewalkedinsi
deher
houseandtookoffhershoeswonderi
nghowshe
wasevergoingtofacehim.

*
**

Thefoll
owingmorni
ng,Ronaf
ixedhi
sti
etal
ki
ngwi
th
hi
sfatheronthephone.
“Wecan’ tj
ustignorethi
s,thi
sgir
lcan’
tjust
disappearthenwemov eonlikei
t’
sok.Legoneaf
ter
magadi waspai dforher.
”
“
Ijustwantt
omov
eonpastKennyi
npeacePapa.
”
“KanaRonat hisi
snotj ustarel
ati
onship,you
broughty ourunclestogether,
wegat heredaround
andwentt oherrelati
ves.Wepaidmagadi forher
.
Ourf amilyandherf amilygotconnected.Youjust
don’tendar elati
onshipony ourownwhi leweknow
anythingabouti t
.Likeyouaresay i
ng,herphoneis
notgoi ngthrough,youheardshegotaj obin
Nami bia,
whataboutherki
ds?Wehav et ocome
togetherasafamil
y,i
fwhatwasf i
rstagreedonis
getti
ngcancel
led,t
henletitbecancelledbecause
ri
ghtnowshei sgoodasy ourwife.
”
Hepickedhi
sbagandcarkey
sthenwal
kedoutof
hi
sroom.
“
It
’sok.Dowhatneedst
obedone.
”
“Wear egoi
ngt oaskf orameet ingfrom the
Laolang’
sthengot hereifweneedt o,discussit
,end
theunionandmov eon.Ican’tbeli
ev ethisiswhat
youwai t
edfiv
ey earsfor.Iam reall
ydisappointedin
thi
sgirl,
tothi
nkIact ual
lyli
kedher .Howar eyou
doingwiththekids?”
Ronasmil
edfi
stbumpi
ngwithQ whowashavi
ng
hi
sbreakf
astwhi
leWazhaf
edSarona.“
Wearefi
ne.
”
“
Iam real
l
ysorryy
ouhadt
odeal
wit
hital
lal
one.I
t
mustbehard.
”
“I
tisbuttheyar
emyr esponsi
bil
it
y.Theyaremy
bl
ood, ev
enifKennyabandonst hem for
ever,
they
wil
lalwaysbemybl ood.”
“Iam pr
oudofyou.Iam happywehav
ehadthi
st al
k,
Atsi
lecal
ledme.Hesayshewantstogetmarr
ied.”
Ronasmil
ed.“
Het ol
dme.Apr i
li
sagoodwoman.Al
l
heneedsi
stotreatherr
ight
.”
“Wel
l,
wearegoingtodealwit
hyourissuef
irst
bef
orewestar
twiththenegot
iat
ionsforAt
sile.
”
“
Ok.By
e.”
“
Bye.
”
Hehungupt henl
ookedatWazha.“
Ihavean
i
mpor t
antmeeti
ngIhavetoat
tend,
Iwil
lbebacki
n
hourortwo.
”
“
Yessi
r.
”
“
Buddy
,let
’sgo.
”
Qfini
shedhi
sdrinkthengr
abbedhi
sbagandwal
ked
outwit
hhisf
ather.
Wazhachangedt
hebaby ’
sdiapert
henlai
dhi
m
downonthebedly
ingbesidehimtaki
ngherphone.
Shecal
l
edherdaughter
.
“
Hel
l
o?Idi
dor
angemoney
.”
“
Isawi
t.Iwi
l
lcol
l
ecti
tlat
er.
”
“Ok.Makesur
eyougetev
ery
thi
ngy
oursi
bli
ngs
need.
”
“
Iheary
ou.Ar
eyoust
il
li
ntr
oubl
eatwor
k?”
“
Idon’
tknowbuthopef
ull
ynot
.Idon’
twanttol
ook
l
i
keIcan’
thandl
ehiski
dswhenIcan.Ir
eal
lyneed
t
hisj
ob.
”
“
Shar
p,Iwi
l
lcal
lyoul
ater
.”
“
Ok.
”
Shehungupandl ookedatLar ona’sli
pf eeli
ngguil
ty.
Shelookedathi sinnocentfacewonder ingwher ehi
s
motherwas.Mr .Mot samai neverspokeofherbutQ
al
way sdid.From howhespokeabouther ,itseemed
shehadj ustabandonedt hem.Shest i
llcouldn’t
understandhowamot herwoul djustabandonher
ki
dsandl eav
ethem wi t
houtfeeli
ngany thing.Hadto
beawi ckedmot herforsure.

*
**
Mothusi
stoppedt
hecaratt
hebout
iquet
henl
eaned
ov
erandkissedNanao.
“
Seey
oul
ater
.”
Shesmi led.“Babeyouknowy est
erdayIwasthi
nki
ng
aboutsomet hing,Icouldbemaki ngsomuchmoney
formy selfi
fIgotmyowncl othesandstar
tedsel
li
ng
them onmyown.If eell
ikeIam j
ustwasti
ngmy
ti
meher ebeingamanagerwhenIcoul dgetmyown
clot
hesandst ar
tselli
ng.”
Mot
husi
smi
l
ed.“
Ili
ket
hesoundoft
hat
.”
“IneedalotmoneythoughbutIf
eel
Iwillbea
successbecauseIam aver
ygoodsalesperson.
”
“Iam notgoingtogiveyoumoneyj ustli
kethat ,
yearsbacky ousaidyouhadabusi nessidea,Igave
youmoneyandy ouendedupj ustspendi ngit.This
ti
mear oundkebatl
agobonabusi nessplan,y ou
presenttheplantomet onightwhenIgethome.
Gapegonnepr of
essionalhela,youar elookingf or
i
nv estorsaker
eandIam y ourpot ent i
ali
nvestorso
conv i
ncemeonwhyIhav et ogivey oumymoney
andwhatIam get ti
ngoutofi t.
”
Nanaof
rowned.“
Whyt
hough?Aker
e-“
“Youdon’
thav
ethemoneytostartabusiness,Ido
soconvi
ncemeonwhyIhavetogi vei
ttoy ou.Iam
notgoi
ngtomakethesamemistaketwiceand
watchmymoneygotowaste.Got owork,loveyou.
”
Sheslowlysteppedoutoft
hecarandwal
kedinsi
de
thebouti
queashedr oveawaydi
ali
nganumberon
hisphoneli
keheal waysdi
donceever
ymonth.
“Hell
o,Iwoul
dli
ket
ospeakt
oKenei
l
weLaol
ang
please…”
“
Eer
ra,
hol
don.
”
Hedr
ovewi
thonehandhol
dinghi
sphonewi
tht
he
ot
her
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Hey
…howar
eyou?
”
“
Iam f
ine.Feel
sst
rangeget
ti
ngacal
lfr
om out
side.
”
Hechuckl
ed.“
So,
howi
sitgoi
ngt
hismont
h?”
“Nobodyevertol
dmefaci
ngy
ourdemonswast
his
hardbutIam doi
ngok.
”
“
Iam j
usthappyy
ouar
eget
ti
ngt
hehel
pyouneed.
”
“
Met
oo.
”
“
Sowhenar
eyoul
eav
ingt
hatpl
ace?
”
“Iguesstheyaregoingtokeepmeher eforali
ttl
e
whilelonger
.”Shesighed.“
Ireal
l
ythoughtthi
swould
takeaweekonl ybutseemst her
eisalotoflayer
sI
neverknewwer ethere.
”
“
Youwi
l
lbesur
pri
sed.
”
“Butthankyouforchecki
nguponme.Ir
eal
l
y
appreciat
eit
.Ihopeyouarenotput
ti
ngy
our
marriageontheli
neforthi
s.”
“
No.I
t’
sal
lgood.
”
“
Okby
e.”
“
Bye.
”
Hehungupandcal
l
edbackThabangwhohadbeen
t
ryi
ngtocal
lhi
m.
“
Yah?
”
“
Whower
eyout
alki
ngt
o?”
“
Kenny
.”
“
Whywoul
dyoubet
alki
ngt
oKenny
,isn’
tsheanex?
”
“
Kennyi
snotj
ustanex.
”
“
Youst
il
ll
oveherdon’
tyou?
”
“
Icar
eabouther
.”
“Waakakwa!(Youar el
ying!)Youloveher
.Youwill
doanythi
ngforher.Ibetifsheevertol
dyouthatshe
wantsyouback,youwilldivorceNanaoandrunto
her
.”
“
Youar
ecr
azy
.”
“Iam notcrazy,y
ouknowIam right
.Youl
ov eKenny
,
Ijusthopeitwon’tmessupwit
hy ourmar
riage
becauseifwear ebei
nghonest,
ifKennyr
eally
want edyou,shewouldhav
elongcameback. ”
“
Whatdoy
ouwant
?”
“Haveyoubeenl
i
steni
ngt
other
adi
o?Mar
kgot
arr
ested.
”
Mot
husi
;
shear
tski
pped.“
What
?”
“
Appar
ent
lyoneofhi
str
ucksgotcaughtwi
thy
oung
gir
lsanddrugsinside.Thedri
vereneappar entl
y
sayshedidn’
tknowwhatwasi nsi
de,hewasj ust
tol
dtodrivethetrucktoSAthenhet oldthecops
whohewor ksfor,apparent
lythisMarkguyhasbeen
doingitf
oryears.Didyouknowany thingabout
thi
s?”
“
No!Wow!Ican’
tbel
i
evet
his.
”
“Atl
eastyouar
enol ongerwor
kingf
orhim.Ist
il
l
can’
tbeli
evet
his.Imagi
nehowmanyy ounggi
rl
s
havegonemissingandgotsol
d?”
Mot
husi
li
ckedhi
sdr
yli
ps.“
Yahneh.
.”

*
**

Ronawal kedinhi
sof f
ice,Yaonetookadeepbreat
h
thenstoodupandwentt ohisdoorandknocked
walki
ngin.Sheswal l
owedst ari
ngathi
mt hencl
osed
thedoorbehindher.Hesatdownasshel ookedat
him.
“
Whati
sit
?”
“
Iam r
eall
ysor
ryf
orcomi
ngt
oyourhouseand
t
ryi
ngto…”
“Ihopeitwasthefirstandl astt
imey oudot hat
thoughIhaveaskedHRt ogiveyouawr it
ten
warningforunprof
essi onali
sm.Iwillnev
erwant
anythi
ngmor ethanj ustyourboss,understandthat
andletitsi
nkin.From t odayonwardsnev ercometo
myhouseunl essItel l
y outo.Nevershowupt omy
houseuninvit
ed.”
“
Yessi
r.
”
“
Good,Iam gl
adwehav et
hisunder
standing,
next
t
imeyoutryit
,don’
tev
enbothercomingtowor kt
he
f
oll
owi
ngday ,ar
eweclear
?Stayinyourlane.
”
Shenodded.“
Yessi
r.
”
Shet urnedandwal
kedout .Shesatonherdeskand
putherhandsonherf aceast he‘
stayiny
ourlane’
repeatedoverandoverinherheadlikeabadsong.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#87

Miaf i
nishedcl
eaningt
hehouseasKefi
l
welayon
thecouchwat chi
ngtheTV.Mial
ookedatt
hesmall
screent hensi
ghed.
“
Theresult
sar
ecomi ngoutt
oday
.CanIhav
emoney
t
orechargemyphone?”
Kef
il
weputherbeerdownandl
ookedatMia.“
Idon’
t
hav
emoney.Akereyoust
olemymoneyyester
day.
”
“Idi
dn’
tst
eal
it,
Itookitandboughtf
oodwi
thi
t
befor
eyoudr
ankalcoholwit
hit.
”
“
Wenagaonamai
tseo!(
Youdon’
thav
emanner
s.)
”
“
Iam goi
ng.
”
Sheputonherfli
pf l
opsasKef il
westoodup.“
Isee
youl
ikegoingtothatman’ shouse,menli
kehi
m are
noti
nter
estedi
nlitt
legirl
slikeyou.Heonl
ywantsto
useyou,hewil
lprobablyrapeyoubecausehefeel
s
youowehim somet hi
ng.”
“Vict
orisnotl
ikethat,hewil
lneverf
orcehi
msel
fon
me.Ifanythi
nghappens, i
twil
lbebecauseIl
eti
t
happenandt r
ustme, Iwil
lnotgoaroundscr
eaming
rapeli
keotherpeopleIknow.”
Shewal kedoutbangi ngt hedoorbehi nd.She
thought full
ytri
edKenny ’snumberbuti tst il
lwasn’t
goingt hrough.Shesi ghedsadl ythenwal kedinside
hernei ghbor ’
sgate.Usingt hespar ekey s,she
unlockedt hedoorandwal kedin.Shecoul dnev er
getov erj usthowbeaut i
ful t
hehousewas.She
smi l
edconnect i
ngherphonet ot hewifi then
checkedacoupl eofpost sonf acebook.She
thought full
ysearchedhersi ster’
spr of
il
et hensighed,
shehadn’ tpostedinmont hsandt helastpostwas
ofherandhersonsmi l
ingatt hecamer a.Shet ooka
deepbr eathandsentheramessage.
Mi a:
Hi,Ihav ebeent r
y i
ngtocal lyournumberbuti t
’s
notgoingt hrough.Isuspecty ouar einconfi
nement
sincelastIhear dyouwer epregnant .Ihavebeen
want i
ngtot ellyouabouty ourrealfatherbutIwas
scareditwasn’ tmypl ace.Iam justgoi ngt
otelly
ou
though,yourr ealfat
hercalledmamat heti
mey ou
weredealingwi ththemur derchar ges.Hisnamei s
KennethPhal adi.Mamasay sher apedherbutIdon’ t
knowf orafact ,shel
iest oomuch, i
t’sdif
ficultt
o
knowwhat ’
strueandwhat ’
snot .Hel eftyouy our
i
nherit
ance, mamawant editbuty ouar etheonlyone
whocangeti t.Youwillhav etocont actthelawy er
thoughbecausemamagav ehi mt hewr ongnumber
andsaidy ouweeov erseast hinkingshewi llget
everyt
hing.Iwi l
lsendpict uresoft hel awyer’
sdet ai
l
s
whenIgethome.
Shesentt hemessaget hensmiledgoingthroughthe
otherpict
ur es,
shecouldn’twai
ttogot oGaborone,
shealreadyhadapi ctur
eofhowt heirsist
erhood
wouldbel ikeanditfel
tgreatj
ustthi
nkingofit.
Shewentt oBot swanaExami nati
onsCouncil
facebookpagebutt herewasnoannouncementy et.
Herey esfell
ont i
me, i
twouldbeacoupl emor e
hoursbeforeLawr encecame, herjobwastobabysit
himt i
l
l Vi
ctorcamebackf rom wor kbutVi
ctorhad
saidhedidn’tmindherhangingar oundhishouseas
l
ongasshedi dn’tbri
ngpeopleov er.
Mi
atookof
fherf
li
pfl
opsandsatont
hecouch
switchingont hehugepl
asmamount edont hewal l
.
Shef l
ippedthroughthechannelsbeforefi
nall
y
rel
axingwat chingamovie.Shelookedathiskitchen
thengotupandwentt opourher sel
fsomej ui
cebut
shepausedst ari
ngatt
hebot t
leofAmar ul
a.She
wonder edifhewasnot i
cingthatsomeonewas
dri
nkingwithhi m.
Shet ookagl assandpour edatinybitanddil
uted
witht heor angejuicethentookasi p,i
thadasweet
tastet hatshel oved.Withasmile,shewentbackto
hissittingroom andputherf eetont hecouch
sippingsl owly.

*
**

Namet somoanedasMaatlahammer edherfrom

behind.Hewentevenhar
derthenf
inall
yfr
ozeand
fi
ll
edherpussywit
hhiscum.Heslidout,Nametso
staggeredt
othebedandlai
ddownexhaust ed.
“
Ihav
etogo,
Iwi
l
lbebacki
nacoupl
eofhour
s.”
“
Ng…”
Hewalkedinsidethebathr
oom andcameout
minut
eslaterdryi
nghimself.Hel
ookedatNametso
sl
eepi
ngt henquickl
ydressedupandwalkedout
answeri
ngBof el
o’scal
l
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Sapphi
rehasawound,
abur
nwoundonhert
high.
”
“
Yes,
shegotbur
ntbyt
he-
“
“Shetoldmeshegotbur ntt
ryi
ngtocook.Whyar
e
youletti
ngyourgi
rl
fri
endmaket heki
dsdowhatthey
shouldn’
tbedoing?”
“Bofelo,i
twasanacci dent.
”Hegotinhiscar
.
“Sapphirewantedtomakesomet hingforNametso,
noonet oldherto.Yout hi
nkNametsowouldletthe
kidsjustcookwithouthersuper
visi
on?”
“Shemakesthekidsdoherjob!Maybeyoushoul
d
hir
eamai dwhowi l
lj
ustdowhatNamet sowas
supposedtobedoingbutcan’
tanymorebecause
sheissucki
ngyourdick.
”
“
Youar
ecr
azy
,Idon’
thav
eti
mef
ort
his.
”
“Iam goingtoputthi
sdownaschi l
dabuse.You
thi
nky ourgir
lf
ri
endcanjustmakemydaught erher
l
ittl
eslave?Sheshouldhaveherownkidsthatshe
willabuseli
kethat
.Iam sureevenEsi
wouldnotbe
happyi fshehear
daboutthis.
”
“
Youar
einsane.
”
Hehungupanddr
oveoutoft
hegat
e.

*
**

Atwor k,Esisatinherof fi
ce,hermi ndpreoccupied.
Shereachedf orherphoneandopenedKenny ’
s
messaget henreaditagain, t
herehasn’tbeenany
communi cati
onsinceandev erydayshegr ewmor e
worri
ed.Mat t
eroffact,shef el
tguilty
.Afterthetal
k
shehadhadwi thPeo,sher eal
izedmay beshe
wasn’tthatmuchofaf riendKennyhadact ual
l
y
needed.
Shescr
oll
edt
hroughhercont
act
sandcal
l
ed
mmagweTumo.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Dumel
ang,
keMoesi
.Kenny
’sf
ri
end.
”
“
Ohhhhowar
eyoumydaught
er?
”
“
Iam f
ine.Hav
eyouhear
dfr
om Kennyy
et?
”
“No.Sheonl
ylef
tal et
tert
hatIj
ustf
oundrecent
ly.I
t
meansshelefti
tforusthedayshel
eftbutInev
er
sawit.
”
“
Whatdi
dshesayi
nthel
ett
er?
”
“Shesaysshehasdecidedtogoawaytogethelp
becausesheisnotwellandthatshewi
llbeback
soon.Shealsosai
dthatsheisfine,
noneedtolook
forher
.”
“
Shei
snotwel
l
?”
“Ir
eall
ydon’tknowwhat’
shappeni
ngwithherbut
hergrandmothermustbetur
ningi
nhergrave.I
fai
ledher.
”
“
Youdidn’
tfai
lanyone.Iam sur
eshei
sfi
ne
wher
evershei
s.”
“
Idon’
tknowany
mor
e.”
“
Iam goi
ngt
olookf
oraPIt
otr
ackherdown.
”
“
Okmydaught
er.
”
“
Gosi
ame.
”
Esi
hungupandcal
l
edSean.“
Heybabe…”
“
Hey,don’
tyouknowanypr
ivat
einv
est
igat
or?Iwant
t
olookforKenny
.”
“
Didn’
tshesayshegotaj
obi
nNami
bia?
”
“Shedi
dbuti tdoesn’
tsoundright
.Shehasn’t
communi catedsi
ncethen.I
t’
sunlikeKenny.Idon’
t
know,Ijusthavethi
sfeel
ingthatsheisnotin
Namibiaandshei ssomewher eel
se.”
“Whereversheis,
sheisal i
ve.May
beshejustneeds
space.Sometimesitgetstoomuchthatyoujust
needspacef r
om every
thingandever
yone.Shewill
cal
lyou,givehert
hespacesheneeds.”
“
Iam j
ustwor
ri
ed.
”
“
Beingwor
ri
edispartofl
if
ebutIdon’
tthi
nkshe
wantst
obefound.Atl
eastnotnow.
”
“
Butt
ojustabandonherki
ds?Igetherbr
eaki
ngup
wi
thRonabutal
sot
hrowi
ngawayherki
dswhi
l
eat
i
t?”
“Ok…let’
snotthr
owstoneswhenweliv
eingl
ass
houses.Shehasherr
easons.Youal
sooncel
eft
yourki
ds.Youhadyourreasons.
”
“Iam nott
ryi
ngtojudge…”Sheclosedherey
es
taki
nginadeepbr eat
h.“Youar
er i
ght,
Iam j
ust
tryi
ngtofi
gureoutwhat’
sgoingonbutwhenshe
comesback,sheisgoingtoexpl
aintome.”
“Andshewil
l,
babeIam i
nt hemiddleofsomet
hing.
Letmecall
youbacklat
er.Ilov
ey ou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Hehungupt
henshecal
l
edRona.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Hey
, boLet
habower easki
ngf
orQy
est
erday
.Has
heclosedatschool
yet?”
“Nah,
today
.Idoubthewill
agr
eetocomether
e
wit
houtboSasa,butLet
haboandKagocanvi
sit
.I
canusemorehands.”
Esi
laughed.“
Ok,
Iwi
l
lbr
ingt
hem t
omor
row.
”
“
That
’sok.
”
“
Howar
eyoumanagi
ngdaddy
?”
Ronal
aughed.“
Iam doi
ngwel
l
.”
“Iam real
lypr
oudofyou.Youareagr
eatdad.Al
lof
theMot samaimen,y
ouguy scanbeawholel
otof
shitbutyouaregr
eatdads.
”
“
Ngng,
yourcompl
i
menti
sfunny
.”
Shelaughed.“
Takei
t.Sohav
eyouspokent
o
Kenny?”
“
No.
”
“
Don’
tyouthi
nki
t’
swor
ri
somet
hatshej
ustwentof
f
l
i
kethat
?”
“
Shesai
dshewant
stoenj
oyherl
i
fe.
”
“Iknowbut
…haveyoul
ookedf
orher
?Imeant
ojust
knowwhereshei
s.”
“No.Shewantsnot
hingt
odowi t
hme, Iam t
ryi
ngto
dealwit
hitandl
ooki
ngforherwil
lbeasetback.”
“Shehasn’
tspokent
omesince,
Iam j
ustwor
ri
ed.By
now,shewouldhavecal
l
edme.”
“Ir
eall
ydon’tknowEsi .AllIam t
ryi
ngtodoisbethe
bestfat
hertomyki dsbecauset heyonlyhav
eme.
Therestwill
sortit
selfout.WhenKennycomesback
forherki
ds,shewi l
lfi
ndt hem t
here.I
fshechooses
notthenitwil
lsti
l
lbef ine.
”
“
Iunder
stand.
”
“
CanIasky
ousomet
hing?
”
“
Yeahofcause…”
“
Doy
our
eal
l
ylov
ethi
sSeanguyofy
our
s?”
Esi
laughedr
oll
i
ngherey
es.“
Yes,
why
?”
“
Wasn’ti
thar
dtomoveonafterMaat
la.Iknowy ou
l
ovedmybrot
heral
ot.Di
dthelovej
ustfadejustli
ke
t
hat?
”
Esisighed.“No.Thelov ewi
l
lfor
everbet her
e.Your
brotherwast heloveofmylif
eforthelongesttime
andsomet i
mesIst i
ll
findmysel
fcryingforhim.
Wheny oureall
ylovesomeoneandf oralongt i
me,
youj ustdon’twakeupandsayohIdon’ tlovethem
anymor e.IdobutIknowIdeservebet t
er.Il
oveSean,
Ididn’tatfi
rstbuti
thappenedover
time.He
under st
andsmewhenIsayl ook,tobehonest ,Isti
ll
l
ov eMaat la,nott hatIwi llgobackbutIcan’ tcont r
ol
myhear t
.Heunder standswhenIwakeupi nt he
mi ddleoft heni ghtcr yingf orallthepainIwent
through.Heunder standsmewhenIt ellhi
m Iam
scaredofopeni ngmyhear tfull
ybecauseIhav e
beenhur tbef ore.Iam st il
l deali
ngwi thitbutIknow
Maat l
awi llforeverhav eapl aceinmyhear tjustthat
ast i
megoeson, Iwi l
lful
lygi vemyhear tt
osomeone
else, Iwill
takeal eapoff aithandgi veitmyal lthenI
willfinall
ysayy es…Ioncel ov edamanbutnowt he
l
ov ehasf aded.Idon’ tknowwhatwentwr ongwi t
h
Kenny ,what everitisIknowdeepdownshel oves
youbutatt hesamet imeIal sounder standtherei s
onlymuchy oucant akeasahumanbei ng.
Somet i
mesy ouhav etoputy ourhappinessf ir
st,put
yoursel ffi
rstbutwheny oumov eon, makesur ey ou
arer eadyf ort hatst epandy ouar enevergoing
back. ”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Thanky
ouf
ort
headv
iceDr
.Phi
l
.”
Esi
laughed.“Youar
ewelcome.Andwheny
oudo
moveon,tlherr
awenaf
indsomeonewhocan
underst
andt
haty
ouhav
eki
dsandl
ovey
ourl
i
ttl
e
crèche.
”
“
Didy
ouj
ustcal
lmyki
dsal
i
ttl
ecr
èche?
”
Shegiggl
ed.“
YouknowwhatImean.Youneedto
fi
ndsomeonewithabighear
tbecausesomeof
thesewomendon’tl
i
kestepki
ds.
”
“
Iwi
l
lkeept
hati
nmi
nd.
”
“
Iwi
ll
talkt
oyouaboutboLet
haboandKago
t
omorr
ow.”
“
Ok.By
e.”
“
Shar
p.”
SheputherphonedownthenwentonGooglewit
h
herlapt
opsear
chingf
orpri
vat
einvest
igat
orsi
n
Botswana.

*
**

Lat
erthatday,Vi
ctorwal
kedinsi
dethehousewit
h
Lawrencethenhepausedstar
ingatMial
yingonthe
couchdeadasl
eep.
Lawr
encel
ookedatMi
a.“
What
’swr
ongwi
thaunt
y?”
“
Goandchange,
shemusthav
efal
l
enasl
eep.
”
LawrencewalkedawaythenVict
orl
ookedatt
he
wineglassonthefl
oorbefor
eshaki
ngMia.
“
Mia!
”
Mi
asnappedherey
esopensi
tt
ingupr
ight
.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
Sheswall
owedst
ari
ngatVi
stor
.“Yes…Ij
ustf
ell
asl
eep.
”
Helookedatt
her
emai
nsofwi
nei
nthegl
assand
l
aughed.
“
AndIhav
ebeenwonder
ingwhot
het
hiefwas.
”
Shel
ookeddownembar
rassed.
“
Howdi
dyoudo?
”
Mi
alookedathi
mthengaspedgr
abbi
ngherphone.
“
Aret
heyout
?”
“
Yes.
”
ShequicklywentonBotswanaExami nati
on
Counsel’
swebsiteandfil
l
edinherdet ai
l
sthen
wait
edpat i
entl
y.Thepageloadedthenshelookedat
herr
esults.Shescreamedjumpingashereyesfell
onallt
heA’ sfr
om toptobottom.
“
Ipassed!
”
Vi
ctorpi
ckedupt
hephoneandlookedather
st
rai
ghtA’sf
oral
lthesubj
ect
s.
“
Thi
sisamazi
ng.Youdeser
vesomet
hingf
ori
t.
”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evet
his.
”
Hehuggedherthenki
ssedher
.“Let
’sgooutf
ora
l
it
tl
ecelebr
ati
on.”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Ok.
”
Shehur r
iedbacktohermot her
’shousewhere
Kefil
wehadpassedout .Miawenti nherr
oom and
putonherr eddress.Shelookedathermot her
’s
heelsthenputonherni cestpairbefor
ewalki
ngout
goingbackt oVi
ctor’
shouse.

6MONTHSLATER
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#88

InShakawe, Esi sl
owl
ydrovetheRangeRov er
l
ookingaroundt henshesmiledseeingthewhite
Rubiconwhichwaspar kednexttoanot hercar
.She
steppedandopenedt hegatebeforedr i
vi
nginand
parki
ngbesidet heRubi
con,ahugesmi l
eonherface.
Shequickl
yst eppedoutthenwenttot hedoorwhere
sheknockedwal ki
ngi
nthehouse.
“Kenny-
“Shepausedtal
ki
ngstar
ingatKenny
’s
companionsitt
ingont
hecouchwithherwhi
l
ethey
bothheldhands.
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
Kennysl
owl
yst
oodupandsmi
l
ed.“
Hey
.”
Esil
ookedatt
hemanandchuckl
edshaki
ngher
head.“
Who’st
his?What
’sgoi
ngonher
e?”
“
Esit
hisisafr
iendofmi
ne,
Pat
o.Pat
o,t
hisi
smy
f
ri
end,Esi
.”
“
Soal
readyy
ouar
ehangi
ngoutwi
thmen?
”
Pat
ost
oodupt
hensmi
l
ed.“
Iwi
l
lcal
lyou.
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Ok.Thanks.
”
“
Sur
e.”
PatowalkedpastEsif
lashi
ngherwithasmil
e.Esi
’
s
heartpoundedasshelookedatKennyangr
il
y.
“
What
’sgoi
ngonher
e?”
“That
’sPat
o,Imethi
m koSbrana,hewast
here
becausehi
sfamil
ywouldn’
taccepthi
mforwhohe-
“
“Idon’
tcar
ewher eyoucoul
dhavemethi
m, whati
s
hedoinghere?Legoneyouwer
eholdi
nghands?”
“Canyourelax?Pat
oandIar
eonlyfr
iends.He
comesfrom aroundher
eandhealwayssaidhe
wouldvi
sitonedaywhenhe-
”
“Iam r eal
lydisappointed.Yousaidy ouwantedsome
ti
mef oryourselfli
key ourther
apistsuggested,Ikept
quietfort helasttwomont hsthi
nkingyouar etrying
tofigur eoutawayf orwardforyourlif
ebuty ety ou
areher e,holdinghandswi thaman.Ronai sraising
yourki dsallalone.Ireall
ythoughtyouwer egoi ngto
tryfi
xingt hi
ngs.”
“Iam.Patoisharml ess,
trustme.Heknowsabout
Rona.Youareov erreact
ing.Ihav enotseenhim
sinceIl
eftSbrana.Hewasj ustbeingsupport
ivenot
thatIwanthim.IknowwhatIwantandIam sur e
aboutit
.Youdon’ thavetowor ry.Kengongadile
yaana?(Whyar eyousoangr y?)
”
“Becauseyousaidyoustil
llov
edRonaandyouwere
depressed.Al
lIwantisforyoutobehappywi
thout
j
inxinganythi
ng.Thatguyisanevi
lspi
ri
tandy
ou
shouldn’
tbeentert
aini
nghim.”
“
Youar
emi
sunder
standi
ngt
his,
Pat
oisact
ual
l
y-”
“Canyoujustt
ell
himtostayaway? ”Esi
sighed.
“Ronaissti
l
lsi
ngle,
heissti
l
lhurt
ingmmeIam
heari
ngaboutsomenursewho..eish.Hetoldme
youcall
ed.”
“Andhewascol dt
ome.I
t’
slikehewast akingtoa
monsterorsomeoneher
eall
yhates.Idon’tbl
ame
him,notaf
terhowIwast
reat
inghim.”
Kenny’
sphoner
angt
henEsi
lookedati
tand
answered.
“
Hi,
Kennyhasamanshel
oves.Shedoesn’
twant
anyr
elat
ionshi
p.”
Patol
aughed.“Wel
lIal
sohaveamanIlove.Iam
gayhunnyi
ncaseyoudidn’
tnoti
ce.Byt
heway ,
that
wigonyourhead…it
’shi
deous.
”
Esipausedt henclosedherey esrecal
li
ngPato.The
wayhehadwal ked,notexactl
ymanl i
ke.God!Even
hisdressing.Whatwast hathehadbeenwear i
ng?
Skinnyjeanswi thapur pl
edenimjacet.Howhadshe
missedt hosesungl assesonhisheadandt he
femininefragrance.Sheclosedhereyes.
“
Iam sosor
ry.Ij
ustt
hought
-“
“
List
ensweet
hear
t,Iam al
lforKer
ona.
”
“
Ker
ona?
”
“
RonaandKenny
.”
“
Pleasecomeback,
Ifeel
sobad.
”
“
Iam r
ighther
ehun,Ihadn’
tlef
tyet
.It
houghty
ou
wer
ehomophobic.
”
“
No!Iam nothomophobi
c.”
“
Good,
Iwasaboutt
otel
lKennyt
hati
fyouwer
ethe
onesheal
way
stal
kedabout
,shewascompl
etel
y
wrong.
”
Thedooropenedt
henPat
owal
kedi
nhangi
ngup.
“
Hil
ove,
Iam Pat
.”
Esi
smiledstar
ingatherl
ongnail
sthenherf
lawl
ess
make-
up.“Iam sosorr
y.I
t’
sjustt
hat-
“
“
Igeti
t.Nowor
ri
es.
”
“
Iam Esi
,forMoesi
.”
“
Ihav
ehear
dabouty
ou.Youwer
eaboutt
oshock
megir
l.
”
“
Ihav
eal
way
swant
edagayf
ri
end.
”
“
Wel
lhunny
,Iam al
lfory
ou.
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
See,
hei
shar
mless.
”
“
Soy
out
wometkoSbr
ana?
”
“
Yes,Iactual
lycameaft
erKennybutwebecame
i
nseparabl
e.Iwasjustt
ell
i
ngherit
’saboutt
imeshe
f
etchedherman. ”
Esi
smi
l
ed.“
That
’swhyIam her
e.Iam r
eal
l
ysor
ry
f
orhowr
udeIwas.Iam notl
i
ket
hat
.”
“I
t’
sok,
wehavecl
ear
edi
tout
.Butsi
s,t
hatwi
g!
Throwi
taway
!”
Esi
laughedt
hent
ooki
tof
f.“
It
’snew.
”
“
It
’snotf
ory
ou.
”
Esil
ookedatKennywhoshrugged.“
Iagr
ee,
those
bangsdon’
tlookgoodonyou.”
Esi
satdown.“
Ok.
”
“
Whatnur
sewer
eyout
alki
ngabout
?”
Esi
sighed.“
Maat l
atol
dmet
hatRonahasacr
ush
onsomenur se.
”
Kenny
’sf
acedr
opped.“
Isshebeaut
if
ul?
”
“Idon’
tknowbuti t
’st
imeyoufixedyourfamily
.You
aregoi
ngt ogowi t
hallt
hereportsfr
om Sbranato
provetohi
mt hatyouwerenotwel l
.Hetrul
ybeliev
es
youdon’tl
ovehim.Didanyresponsecomef rom
CEDAaboutt hefund?”
Kennyshookherhead.“
No.Iam ev
ensel
li
ngasmal
l
pi
eceofthefar
m Mmamal eftf
orme.Thefar
misso
big,nowonderKef
il
wewant edit
.Thatplotint
he
outski
rt
sofGaboroneisst
il
l t
here.Iwanttobuyi
t,
theownerhasdecreasedt
hepr i
ce.”
Pathel
dhiswai
st.“
Girl
dowhaty
oumustt
omake
thepot
stobedone.”
Kennysighed.“
Hav
eyouaskedRonaaboutt
he
nurse?
”
Esi r
olledherey es.“Thenurseisnotaf act or.Rona
l
ov esy ou,y
es, hemi ghtbehur tbuthel ov esy ou.
Yourki dsneedy ou.Youhavehadenought imet o
pullyoursel
ft ogether.Gett
hepl ot,gety ourf amily
.If
youl oseRonaIt elly
ou,youwi l
lli
vet oregr etitfor
therestofy ourlifebecauset r
ustme, youwi llnever
meetamanl ikehi m.Thatmanwai tedforf iveyears
foryou, hewast herewheny ouwal kedoutofpr i
son,
hecoul dhav echeat edwheny ouwer epr egnantbut
hedi dn’t
.Yes, hemi ghtbecrushingonanur sebut
i
t’sonlybecausehei sl
onely.Ronai stheki ndof
many oushoul dnev erl
etgoof .”
Kenny
’sphoner
angt
hensher
eachedf
ori
t.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Hi
,Isawyourpostonf
acebookaboutt
hef
armi
n
Shakawe.
”
“
Yes,
it’
sst
il
lupf
orsal
e.Just30hect
ars.
”
“
Ok,
fort
hatpr
ice?
”
“
Eemma.
”
“
MyhusbandandIwantt
obuy.Wear
einMaunso
wecancometomorr
owtosee.
”
“
Yes.
”
“Ok,thammawenadon’tsel
ltoany
one.Wear
e
goingtobuyi
t.Wehavethemoney.”
“
Ok.
”
“
Thanksl
ove.
”
“
Bye.
”
Shedr
oppedt
hecal
lthenscr
eamedexci
tedl
y.
“
Ifoundabuy
er!
”

*
**
InGabor one, RonaheldWar onasitt
ingi nthequeue
atthehospi tal.Wheni twasfinal
lyhisturn,hestood
upandwal kedi nsi
de.Thenur seturnedwi thasmile
readyt oat tendanot herpat
ientthenpaused.She
chuckl edasRonasmi ledstari
ngather .Herdark
skinsui therper fectl
y,heactuall
ycouldn’timagi
ne
herl ookingl ight
er.Sheworeheraf roli
keacr own,
heruni queki ndofbeautybeingthecent erof
attraction,ev ery
thingabouthermadeherbeaut i
ful.
Evenherv oi ce,hecouldn’
tquiteexplai
ni tbuti
twas
allalluri
ng.
“What’swr ongwi t
hWar ona?Lastweeki twasSasa,
theotherweekLar ry.Gompi enokeWar ona,what’
s
wrongwi thher ?Fl
ue?Ar onadoy oureal
izethat
ther
ear eot herpatient
swhoact uall
yneedhelp?
KanaIj ustdon’tsithereandwai tf
oryoutocome
andli
esay i
ngsomet hingiswr ongwiththebaby,y
ou
areabusingt hesecut ethings-“
“Mydaught
eri
ssick.Shei sreall
ysi
ck.GapeIdon’
t
knowwhatyouaretryi
ngt osay,thi
sisa
gover
nmenthospi
talandIhav ethefreedom to
comeandbetreat
edher e.Attendmydaught er
mma.
”
Hesatdown.Shesatopposi
tehi
mtaki
ngWar
ona’
s
car
dfrom hi
m.
“
What
’swr
ongwi
thhert
oday
?”
“
Youar
escar
ingmydaught
er,
smi
l
e.”
Emanglookedathi
mt henlaughed,hereyes
shr
inki
ngabit.“
Ronapleasego,Itol
dy oual
ready
.”
“At
tendmydaught
er.Sheisnotf
eel
i
ngwel
l
.Idon’
t
knowwhat’
swrongwithher.
”
Shegotupt hentookWaronawhowi l
l
ingl
yopened
herarmswant i
ngtobepicked.Emangsmiled
star
ingatherchubbycheeks.
“
Heybaby…heybaby!
”Emangtickl
edhert
henshe
t
hrewherheadbackl
aughi
ng.
“Daddyi
sly
ing,
for
cingsicknessony
ou?Iknow,
it’
s
sadyouhavehi
mf orafather.
”
“
Dada…”
“Daddy…wow!Youcantal
k?”Emangki
ssedher
chubbycheekswi
thahugesmil
eonherface.
Emangsatdownholdi
ngWaronaandsmiledt
hen
tur
nedt
oRona,tear
sfil
l
ingherbr
owneyes.
“Cany oupl
easest op.Forthel
astthreemont hs,y ou
havebeencomi ngher eeveryweek.Youkeep
bri
ngingtheselit
tl
eangelsandIam f alli
nginlove
withthem.Onedayy ouaregoingtost opandit’s
goingtobreakmyhear t
.Justgobackt oyourbaby
mama.Youcan’ tgivemeast r
aightanswerwheni t
comest oher,Idon’twanttogethurt.Ihav ealotof
i
ssuesi nmylifeandIcan’tputahear tbreakont op
ofit.
”
“
Whosai
dIam goi
ngt
obr
eaky
ourhear
t?Iam done
wi
tht
hei
rmot
her.”
“YouarelyingRona.Youareonlysayingthat
becauseshei snothere.Onceshearriv
es,thingswill
change.Pleasejustl
eavemeal one.GapeIcan’ t
havekids.Ihadwombcancery ear
sbackandhadt o
undergohy st
erect
omysof orgetmegi vi
ngy oukids.
”
Ronasmil
ed.“
Ebil
ekebatl
awenabecauseIal
so
don’
twantmoreki
ds.Iam good.
”
Emangr
oll
edherey
es.“
Cany
ouj
ustgo?Anot
her
pat
ientneedst
obet
reat
ed.
”
Ronalookedathi
swat ch.“Nah,
Ist
il
lhav
eacoupl
e
ofminutes.Wawa,dothatthi
ngyoudosomet
imes,
st
artcryi
ngfornoreason.”
Emangl aughed.“
Mxm,gatwestar
tcr
yingf
orno
reason…leavemyangelal
one.
”
“
Let
’sgooutfordi
nnertoni
ght
.”Ronastoodupand
wal
kedroundhersmall
tabl
ethenlookedather.
“
Let
’ssayatLan’
sfoodbar.Wecanmeett her
e.”
Emangl
ookedathi
mthenshy
lyl
ookeddownatt
he
baby
.
“
KanammeIknowonceyourbabymamacomes,
y
ouaregoi
ngt
orunback.
”
“
Wewi
l
lmeetat7r
ight
?”
“
Yourt
imei
sup.
”
Ronat
ookWar
ona.
“
Ok,
7iti
s.”
Hewalkedoutwit
hhisdaught
er,Emangt
ookadeep
br
eat
ht hencal
l
edthenextpat
ienti
n.
*
**

Tshenol
ot r
iedKgosi’
snumbert hensi ghedputti
ng
thephonedown.Shehadwokenupt ohim alr
eady
goneyetitwasSaturday
.I twasn’tli
kehi mtowor k
onweekendsort ospendthewhol edaywi t
hhis
phoneoff.Shetookadeepbr eathtryi
ngt obrushoff
thebadfeeli
ngbutitwouldn’
tjustleaveher.
Andr
eawal
kedi
n.“
Mama,
ther
eissomeoneatt
he
door
.”
Tshenolost
oodupandwal
kedtothedoort
hen
opened.Shefr
ownedl
ooki
ngatthet
wopoli
ce
off
icer
s.
“
Dumel
ang,
ist
hisKgosi
Disang’
shouse?
”
“
Eer
ra.HowcanIhel
pyou?
”
Thepoli
ceoffi
cersl
ookedatoneanotherbef
ore
tur
ningbacktoher,
Tshenolo’
shear
tstart
ed
pumpingsofastsheputherhandonherchest
wait
ingtohearwhattheyhadtosay
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#89

Thepoliceoffi
cersl
ookedatoneanot herbef
ore
tur
ningbackt oher,
Tshenolo’
shear
tst art
ed
pumpingsof astsheputherhandonherchest
wait
ingtohearwhatt heyhadtosay.Anotherpol
ice
vandroveinandt womor epol
iceof
ficersandtwo
sol
dierssteppedout.
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?Ev
ery
thi
ngok?
”
“
Wher
eisy
ourhusband?
”
“
Hei
snoty
ethome.Hel
efti
nthemor
ning.
”
“
Wewoul
dli
ket
osear
chf
orhi
m.Hei
sunderar
rest
.”
“
What
?Forwhat
?”
“Thel
isti
slongbutmostl
yforhumant
raf
fi
cki
ng.
Thist
imearoundheisgoi
ngdown.”
Tshenolol
ookedatt
hem shaki
ngherhead.“
Youar
e
confused.
”
“
Yourhusbandwast
hemast
erpl
anbehi
ndi
tal
l
.He
i
salsogoi
ngdownf ortwomurdercount
s.Canwe
l
ookforhi
m?Pleaseletusdoourjob.
”
Shemovedfrom t
hedoorlet
ti
ngthem i
n,shest
il
l
coul
dn’
twraphermindoverwhatthepol
iceof
fi
cers
hadbeensayi
ng.
Theywal
kedaroundt
hehousesear
chi
ngf
orhi
m
t
henfi
nal
l
ywalkedout.
“I
fyouar
ehi
dinghi
m,y
ouar
egoi
ngt
ogodownwi
th
hi
m.”
Theywalkedout
,Tshenol
oslowl
ywal
kedback
i
nsidet
hehouse,kneesweak.

*
**

Emangst oodinfrontoft hemirrorfixi

ngherbaby
hair
swi thherhairti
edi ntoabun.Shel ookedat
herselfmor ethensighed, sheneverdidhermake-up,
thefoundat i
onswer ealway salitt
ledarkerorl
ight
er
thanherski ntone.Shel ookedather selfi
nared
backlessbodyhuggi ngdr ess.Shel ookedatherhi
ps
andsmi l
ed,
shehadn’twornthedresssi
ncetheti
me
shehadboughtitanditr
eall
ylookedgoodonher.
Shepickedtheheel
sshenev err
eall
yworethenput
them onasherphonerang.Shetookitf
rom t
hebed
andanswered.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Arey
ouhomeal
ready
?”
“
Yeah.
”
“Tl
hammacanIdr opofVeeandPal esathere?Iam
goi
ngoutwi t
hthei
rfatherandIneedsomeonef or
babysi
tt
ing,
nannydisappoint
edmel astminut
e.”
“
Ican’
t.Iam goi
ngoutonadat
e.”
Hersi
sterpaused.“
Youl
i
e!”
Emangl
aughed.“
It
’st
hatguyIt
oldy
ouabout
.”
“
Theonewi
tht
ri
plet
s?”
“
Yes.
”
“It
houghtyousai
dhewaski
ndashadywheny
ou
askedabouthi
sbabymama.
”
“
Ijustwantt
ogot
ogethi
m of
fmyback.Kanahe
keepscomingbackev er
yweektoannoyme.Today
hesaysheisoverherbuthesaysi tbecausehe
hasn’
tseenheri
nawhi l
e.Kanafeeli
ngsaret r
icky
.
Youmayt hi
nkyouareov ersomeonet henwheny ou
seethatper
son,y
our eal
izeyoul
iedt oyoursel
f.”
“
Eish,
andy
ouar
eri
ghtaboutt
hat
.”
“Idon’
twanttogethurt
.IhavebeenhurtsomuchI
don’twantt
oputmy sel
fthr
oughthatanymore.
”
“I
t’
sbeenyearsEma,
ofcauseIdon’
tli
ket
hisguy
buti
t’
sti
mey oumovedonwithsomeonedif
fer
ent
.”
“
Ahhh…any
way
s,Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Noi
t’
sok,
Iwi
l
ldr
opt
hem of
fathi
ssi
ster
’shouse.
”
“
Ok,
bye.
”
“
Bye.
”
Emahungupthenpickedherhandbagandwalked
out
.Sheunl
ockedhernavyblueC300AMGt hen
j
umpedinanddroveofftot
her est
aur
ant.

*
**
Att herestaurant,Emapar kedhercart henstepped
outandwal kedi nsi
de.Shespokebr i
ef l
ytoawai ter
whowentwi thhert othefrontdeskt henshegot
directedtothepr i
vatetabl
e.Shel ookedathi m as
shewal kedi n,hest oodupdr essedinsi mplechino
pant sandat ur
tleneck.Shelookedathi swatchthen
cl
eanf i
ngersashehel dherhandandhuggedher .
Hesmel tsogoodshewonder edifherper f
umewas
al
r i
ghtbutf eeli
ngt hathardbodyagai nsthers
broughtf i
rewor ksinherstomach.Shef i
nall
y
steppedbackwi thasmi l
e.
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Ilookov
erdr
essed.
”
“No,
thi
sisper
fect
.Tr
ustme.It
houghty
ouwoul
dn’
t
come.”
“It
houghtwhatwouldbebett
ert
hanr
eject
ingyouin
person,
from her
eIam sur
eyouwon’
tbebotheri
ng
me.”
Hepul
l
edoutt
hechai
rforherwi
thasmi
l
e.“
Sit
.”
Sheslowlysatdownthenhesatopposi
tehi
mthen
pour
edt hem t
hewinehehadordered.
“Ihopeyouwon’
tthi
nkIam acont
rol
freak,Ihadj
ust
orderedt
hei
rbestwi
nebefor
eyoucame. ”
“
No,
it’
sok.
”
Hegav
eheragl
asst
hent
ookhi
s.
“
Shoul
dwemakeat
oast
?”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Yes,
toy
oust
ayi
ngawayf
rom me.
”
“
Whydoy
ouhat
eme?
”
Emal
aughed.“
Hat
eyou?Idon’
that
eyou.
”
“
Youl
ovemet
hen?
”
“
Ilov
eev
ery
one.
”
“
Wel
lthencheer
stoy
oul
ovi
ngme.
”
Emasmi
l
ed.“
Youar
egoi
ngt
ohur
tme.Icanf
eel
it.
”
“
Whydoy
ousayso?
”
“
Youhaveunresol
vedissuesfr
om yourpast
.Youar
e
t
hety
pet owanttomov eonbutdon’twantt
odeal
wi
thyourpast
.Nextthi
ngy ouknowIam nowan
obst
aclebet
weentwopeopl
ewholoveeachot
her
andguesswhoisgoi
ngtogethur
t?Me.
”
Ronalookedatherasshespokecal
mlyasusual
thensi
ppedhiswine.
“
Youar
eov
ert
hinki
ngt
his.
”
“No.YouknowIam r i
ght .From whaty out oldme
abouty ourbabymama, Isuspectshehadwhatwe
call
Pr enataldepr ession, depressi ont hatoccur s
whenawomani spr egnant .Shepr obabl yfeltmor e
sadt hanhappy .Shemi ghthav ef eltanxiousand
angry.Al otofpeopl edon’ tknowabouti t,alotof
mommi esoutt her edon’ tknowi t
’sat hing, theyrule
i
tunderhor monesbuti t’
ssomet hingr eal.Al otof
womenact uallyfeel ashamedt oshar ebecauseat
theendoft heday ,
theyar eex pect edt ofeel
overj
oy edandexci tedwhenpr egnant .Imagi nenow
feel
ingt heopposi te.It’
snotherf aul tthatshe
suff
er edfrom depr ession, shedi dn’tchoosei t.You
mighthav enot icedshel ostal otofi nterestint hi
ngs
sheusedt olove, anger, pushingpeopl eaway ,
want i
ngt odisconnectwi thpeopl eshel ov es.Af t
er
shegav ebi rt
h,shet hensuf f
eredf r
om whatwecal l
postnataldepressi
on,depressionthathappensafter
thebabyi sborn.Shefeelsdisconnectedtothebaby,
mayev enhur tthebaby,orhurthersel
f.All
ofwhat
youbriefl
ysaidhappenedexpl ainsthosetwothings
Ijustt
aughty ouaboutsincey ouareuneducated.
Now, howdoy ouexpectmet oactual
lybejumping
i
nt oarelati
onshipwit
hy ouwhenIknowt hat99%
chancesar ethatyouwillgobackt oher?”
“
Igeti
t.I
tmakessensenow.
”
“
See?
”
“Butitonlymakessenset ot hekids, doesn’ texplai
n
mostt hi
ngsshesai d.Idi
dn’twantt hi sdinnert obe
aboutmeandmypr oblemsbuther ei tis,shesai d
theloveshehadf ormel ongended.Shesai dal ot
mor ethi
ngst hatwer edir
ect edtome, notthekids.
Fortheki ds,
y ouaremaki ngpur esensebutasof
ourrelat
ionship,thatwasj ustanothert hi
ng.She
mayhav ebeendepr essedbutt ocompar emet oa
mant hatoncewant edher?Howi st hatpr enatal or
depressionorpostnat aldepr essi
on?Rej ectingthe
kidsyes,hatingthekids,yes, abusi
ngt heki ds,yes.I
agreebutwhataboutt her est?”
Thewaitercamewit
htheirst
art
ers.Emasmi
l
ed
droppi
ngtheheav
ysubject.“
Okwow! ”
Ronasmi l
ed.“It
hinkweshoul
ddropt
hatdepr
essi
ng
conversat
ionandactual
l
yfocusonwhatwecame
herefor.
”
“
Thi
slooksdel
i
cious.
”

*
**

KennylaidonherbedasEsi andPatchat tedloudly

i
nhersi t
ti
ngr oom laughing.Sher eachedf orher
phoneandwentt hroughRona’ sfacebookt i
mel i
ne
again.Shesmi l
edst ar
ingatthepi cturesoft hekids,
shewentt hroughthecomment sonev er
ypict ur
e
thenshef i
nall
ysighedsitti
ngupr i
ghtandcal ledhim,
herheartpounding.Thephoner angf orawhi l
e.

*
**
Atthedi
nner,
Rona’sphonerangonthet
abl
e,he
l
ookedatthecall
erIDt
henignoredi
twhi
leEmang
at
e.Itst
art
edringi
ngagain.
“
Letmegett
his.
”
Emasmi
l
ed.“
It
’sok.
”
Hest
oodupandwal
kedt
other
est
rooms.
“
Whatdoy
ouwant
?”

*
**

Kennyt
ookadeepbr
eat
h.
“
Hi,
canwet
alk?
”
“
Iam busy
.Iwi
l
lcal
lyout
omor
row.
”
“
Ronapl
ease…Iwantt
oseet
heki
ds.
”
“
Whost
oppedy
ou?
”
“Iam comi
ngther
etomorr
ow.Iwantt
oexpl ai
n.I
wasn’twel
l
.Youknowthatwasn’
tme.Iknowi t
’s
hardtobel
iev
ebutIwi
llbr
ingt
hedoctor
’sreport
sto
proveit
.Iwasgoi ngt hr
oughal otandIam sorryy
ou
wereatt herecei
vingend, youandthekids.Youare
angry,youhav eever
yr i
ghtt obe.YouknowIlove
yousomuch, Iwouldnev erhavemeantwhatIsaid
then.Iwill
explai
nev ery
thing.It
’smorethanwhatI
thoughttheproblem was.”
“
Kenei
l
weIam busy
.Youar
edi
stur
bingme.
”
“
Ihear
dabouty
ourl
i
ttl
enur
se.
”
“
Bye.
”
“Don’thanguponme.Iam comingtomor
row,Iam
notlosingyout
oamerenurse.Iam comi
ngthere.
”
“
Idon’
twanty
ouany
mor
e.”
Shel aughed.“ Youarecr azy,whenIwalkedoutof
pri
sonandt ol
dy ouIdidn’twantyouany more,what
didy ousay ?Nnar rakejol alewena,t
seotsaboI
don’twanty ouany morei syourownissue,sese
salang, kejolalewenaebi l
ekeetako,shouldIfi
nd
whor esi nmyhouse, Iwi llnotonl
yshootherbutI
willkil
lherandcr ippl
ey ou.Thisisnotathreatbuta
promi se.”
“
Youshoul
dgobackt
oSbr
ana.
”
“Todowhat ?Iam backtoputmyf amil
ytoget
her.O
batagont enaRona, Youar egoingt omarryme.I
don’tknowwhaty ouwerecancel l
inginmyabsence.
Idon’tcarewhaty ouaresay i
ng, i
t’
snotmybusi ness,
Iam datingy ouandIam y ourwife!Iam theonl
yone
whowi llbeMr s.RonaMot samai ,
letmef i
ndanur se
i
nmyhouse, keti
legogopat agany aleene.You
wantt oseehowmuchcr azyIcanbeIsee.Iam not
goingtof ightformymanwi t
hanot herwoman, i
t’
s
notgoingt ohappen,Iwil
l j
ustkillherl
ikeyouyou
kil
l
edKay .Iam comi ngthere.”
Hepressedherl
ipstry
ingnottolaughathowshe
soundedbutheburstoutl
aughing.
“
Youar
ecr
azy
.”
“
Keagor
ataRonaaut
wa?Kennywagor
ata.
”
“
Stopt
his.
”
“Heel
a,kar
ekeagorat
a,can’
tyouhearme,anywho,
I
l
oveyou.Iwil
lseey
outomorrowok,whatshoul
dI
bri
ngyou?”
Hechuckl
ed.“
Youar
elosi
ngi
t.
”
“Ican’
twaittoseeourkidsandy ou.Iam soexcit
ed.
Iam readytogetmarri
ed,Iheardyourmot herhat
es
me, t
ellhert
hatsheshouldjustr
elaxbecauseIam
heretostay.Shewil
ll
oveme.Herandt herestofthe
family
.”
“
Bye.
”
“
Byebabe.Tomor
rowmyl
ove.
”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#90

Atthedinner
,Ronasatdownt
henEmal
ookedat
hi
m withasmi l
e.
“
Thi
swasdel
i
cious.Thanky
ou.
”
Hegotupt hentookherhandhelpingherup.They
walkedoutoftherest
auranthol
dinghands,Ema
unl
ockedhercarfrom adist
anceasRonal ookedat
herwithasmile.
“
Youl
ookedbeaut
if
ult
oday
.”
“
Youmeanov
erdr
essed?
”
“
No.Youlookr
eal
l
ybeaut
if
ul.Wear
egoi
ngt
odo
t
hisagai
n.”
“Iam notdoi
ngany
thi
ngwi
thy
ou.Gobackt
oyour
babymama. ”
“
Idon’
twanther
.”
Emangsmi l
ed.“Idon’
tbel
iev
eyou.Goanddealwi
th
herf
ir
st,
from thereIwi
llt
rul
ybel
i
eveyou.Deal
wit
h
yourpast,y
ouhav en’tspokent
oheri nmonthssogo
andt i
ght
enallloosescrews,af
terthatmaybe…just
may beImightconsideryoubecauseasfornow, y
ou
arewasti
ngy ourti
me. ”
“
Ok,
fai
renough.Canwegof
orl
uncht
omor
row?
”
“
Igot
ochurchonSunday
s.Deal
wit
hyourbaby
mamaRona.”
“
Whatt
imedoeschur
chend?
”
“
2.”
“Ok,wewi
ll
hav
elunchthen.Youcancomeovert
o
myhouseasafri
endorIwil
lcomeov er
.Il
i
ke
spendi
ngmyweekendsathomewi t
hmykids.
”
“
From chur
chIl
i
ker
elaxi
ngi
nmyhouse.
”
“
Iwi
l
lpayy
out
ocomeov
er.Pl
ease…”
“
Ok.P200.
”
“
Gaoswabe?
”
Emal
aughed.“
Giv
emet
heP200.
”
Ronatookouthi
sbusinesscar
dandgav
eitt
oher
toget
herwi
ththeP200.
“Pl
easecallmeorelseMondayIam goingtocome
andIam goingtocomplai
ntot hemanagementthat
youweregivingmeanatti
tude.Ebi
leIwil
lposty
ou
onfacebook.”
Ematookt hecar
dthenwalkedtohercarl
aughi
ng.
Ronasmiledstar
ingatherasmadeherwaytoher
cart
henshegoti nanddroveof
f.Hewenttohiscar
anddrov
ehomewi thabigsmil
eonhisface.

*
**

Tshenolopacedar oundthehousel aterinthe

eveni
ngr ubbingherhandst ogether.Shel ookedat
herphone, i
twasal mostmi dni
ght .Someone
knockedont hebedr oom doorroughl y.Herheart
ski
ppedasshewal kedov erandopenedt hecurt
ain.
Shequicklyopenedt hewindow, tearsf i
l
li
ngherey es.
“
Kgosi
…thepol
i
ce…what
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Opent
heki
tchendoor
.”
Shenoddedt
henr
ushedt
otheki
tchenwher
eshe
unl
ockedthedoort
henhewal
kedi
n.Shehugged
hi
mt i
ghtl
ycryi
ng.
“
Shhh.
.youwi
l
lwaket
heki
ds.
”
Hepul
l
edhertothebedr
oom t
henwentwi
thher
i
nsi
dethebat
hroom.
“
Hey
…”
Tear
srol
l
eddownhercheeks.“Kgosiwhat’
sgoi
ng
on?Humant
raf
fi
cki
ng?Ican’tbeli
evethi
s.”
“Ilongstoppedjustt
hatthepersonIusedtodoit
withbackt hengotcaughtandhewouldn’tgodown
alone.”
“
Whatdoy
oumeany
oul
ongst
opped?Soy
ouwer
e-“
“
Iam notper
fectorf
ucki
ngholy!Therey
ouhav
eit
!I
t
oldy
ouwhenImety ouandIneverli
edtoy
ou.
”
Tshenol
o’sl
i
pst
rembl
edasshel
ookedathi
m.
“I
fyouwant
edahol
yman,
may
bey
oushoul
dhav
e
pray
edmore!
”
“
Kgosi
…”
“
Iam goi
ngt
ogot
ojai
l
…forav
eryl
ongt
ime.Imi
ght
nevergetout,shi
thashitthefan.IhaveaplanbutI
am notsureifyouaregoingtolikeit
.It
’sei
thert
hat
orIgotojail
.”
Shel
ookedathi
m.“
What
?”

*
**

Emalai
di nherbedstar
ingatthebusi
nesscard.She
smil
edthenreachedforherphoneandcopiedthe
numberinherphone.Withadeepbreath,
shecalled
hi
m.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Soy
ouar
etheownerofMot
sami
Real
Est
ate?
”
“
Ithoughty
ouwer
enotgoi
ngt
ocal
l
.”
Emal
aughed.“
Met
oo.
”
“
Thenwhydi
dyou?
”
Shel
ookedatt
hecei
l
ing.“
Tosayt
hanky
ou.Di
nner
wasni
ce.”
“
Liar
!That
’snotwhyy
oucal
l
ed.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
That
’swhyIcal
l
ed.
”
“
Youar
ecomi
ngt
omor
rowr
ight
.”
“
No.
”
“
Well
,youwil
lbecal
l
edf
orahear
ingonMonday
.
Wai
tandsee.
”
Emal
aughed.“
Youar
ecr
azy
.Iam sl
eepi
ng.
”
“
Tlhammawenapleasecome.Letusbef r
iendsi
n
t
hemeanti
me.Icandofri
endshi
p.Please…”
“
Ok.Seey
out
omor
row.
”
“
Bye.
”
Shehungupandt
ookapi
l
lowandputi
tonherf
ace.

*
**

Thefoll
owingmorning,Kennyshowedherbuyer
sthe
pi
eceoft hefar
mt heyweregoingtoget
.The
husbandlookedathiswife.
“Whataboutthewhol
efar
m?Howmuchwi
l
lyoube
sel
li
ngitfor
?”
“
Iam notsel
li
ngt
hewhol
efar
m,i
t’
smyi
nher
it
ance,
i
t’
scl
oset omyhear
t.
”
Thewi
fenodded.“
Ok.
”
Thehusbandsmil
ed.“
Wewil
ltakei
t.Sowewi
l
ljust
putafencear
oundours.
”
“
Yes.
”
“Ok.ThankGodwef oundt
his,
mywi
femadeus
dri
veherelastni
ght
.”
Kennylaughed.“Shedi
dwel
lbecauseal
otofpeopl
e
havebeencalli
ng.”
Thewi
fesmil
ed.“It
oldhi
m wearenott
heonl
yones
whowanttobuy
,Ili
ter
all
yhadt
oforcehi
mtodri
ve
l
astni
ght
.”
Theywalkedbacktothei
rcar
sdi scussi
ngf ur
ther
detai
lst
il
lthepay
mentdetail
s,awhi l
elaterKenny
gotinhercart
hentookherphoneasherbuy ers
droveoff
.Shecal
ledanumber .
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hi,youarespeaki
ngtoKenei
lweLaol
ang,
wespoke
l
astnight
.Iwanttobuyt
heplot.
”
“
Youdo?
”
“Yes,Iam dr
ivi
ngt
oGaboronefrom Shakawe,
Iwi
l
l
seeittomorr
owmor ni
ng.I
sthatok?”
“
Yes.Goodthi
ngthatyouar
ecomingbecauseIam
t
rav
ell
ingoutofcount
ryi
ntwoday
s.”
“Ok,i
fit
’spossi
ble,
Iwanttheownershi
pri
ghts
changedassoonaspossiblebecauseIwantt
ost
art
devel
opingthepl
ot.”
“
That
’sf
ine.Seey
out
omor
row.
”
Shehungupanddr
ovebackhomedi
ali
nganot
her
number.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Hi,y
ouarespeakingtoKeneil
weLaol
ang,
youwere
recommendedt omebysomeone.Iwanttoopenan
event’
sgarden,
Isawt heworkyouhav
eoncedone
beforeandIam impressed.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“Iam comingtoGabor
one,Iwantustodiscusswhat
Ihaveinmi ndf
ormygardenandIwantittostart
operati
nginafewmonths.Iwil
lsendyouaf ew
pict
urestoshowyouwhatIhaveinmind”
“
Ok.Whenwoul
dyoul
i
ket
omeet
?”
“Tomorr
owatuhh9inthemorni
ng.Iwi
ll
pickyouup
sothatyoucanal
soseet
hespaceIwanttouse.
”
“
Ok,
tomor
rowt
hen.
”
Kennyparkedhercarandsteppedoutwalki
nginsi
de
hergrandmother
’shouse.ShelookedPatandEsias
theywatchedTV.
“Iam goingtoGaboronevi
aGhanzi
.Iam goi
ngnow,
byuh..”Shelookedatherwat
ch.“
Byaround6orso,
Iwouldhav earr
ived.
”
Esi
lookedatKenny
.“Ihav
etogobackt
oo.
”
Patsmi
l
ed.“Ihav
eacoupl
eoft
hingsIhav
etodeal
wit
hher
e.”
“
It
’sok.Iunder
stand.
”
“
Esi
,l
et’
sgo.Iam t
aki
ngmybag.
”
“
Didy
out
ell
Ronay
ouar
ecomi
ng?
”
“
Yes.
”
Shewalkedinsidehergr
andmother’
sroom where
shehadsleptlastni
ghtt
hensmiledstar
ingather
phot
oframeofherandhergr andmother.Shet
ookit
andsmiled.
“Isoldthepi eceoft hefarmforqui t
eahandsome
amount .Iam goi ngt opayforthatplotkoGabor one
andst artdev elopingit.Ihopethemoneywi l
lbe
enoughf orev eryt
hingbutIknowt heeventgarden
willbeasuccess, Ibeli
eveinmypl anandIwi ll
do
everythinginmypowert omakei twork.Iam also
goingt ot r
yandgetRonabackbutIam scar ed…I
j
ustpr ayt hatGodgi vesmet hest r
engthtoputmy
fami l
ybackt oget herbecauseIdon’ twanttolose
him.”Shebl i
nkedandsmi l
edwi pi
ngat ear.
“
Ilov
eyou.Il
ovey
ousomuchandImi
ssy
ou.
”
Shesighedthenputthefr
amebackandgrabbedher
bagthenwalkedouttoEsiwhowasstandi
ng
outsi
dewithPat.Sheputherbagi
nthebootthen
huggedPato.
“
Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ngt
oseeme.
”
“
Any
timebabe,
any
time.
”
Kennyl
ookedatEsi
.“Let
’sgo.
”
Theyal
lgoti
nthei
rcar
sthendr
oveof
f.

*
**

Laterthatday,Ronaputt helunchatthebackyard
l
awn.Hel ookedathispicnicsetupthensmi l
ed
happywi thhimself
.Her ushedbackinsidethehouse
andchangedi ntoshortsandat -shi
tthenlookedat
hi
ski dsallni
celydressed.
Ql
ookedathi
m conf
used.
.
Ronasmi
l
ed.“
Aunt
yEmai
scomi
ngov
er.
”
Ql
ookedathi
ssi
bli
ngs.“
Aret
heysi
ck?
”
“
No.Sheisjustgoi
ngtocometospendsomet
ime
wi
thus.Sheisafri
endofour
sakere.
”
Qsmi
l
ed.“
Ili
keher
,shei
sni
ceandsheal
way
sgi
ves
mesweet
s.”
“
Ili
kehert
oo.
”
Ronat
ookouthi
sri
ngi
ngphonef
rom hi
spocket
.
“
Hey
…”
“
Hi,
Ihav
ear
ri
ved.It
hinkIam att
her
ight
ful
place.
”
Ronawalkedoutthenpr
essedthegate’sr
emote.
Ema’snavybl
uebenzdrovein.Sheparkedbesi
de
hi
scarandsteppedoutinawhitefl
oraldr
essand
fl
i
pflops.
Ronawal
kedov
ert
ohert
henhuggedher
.
“
Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ng.
”
“
Youwoul
dn’tst
opcal
li
ngme,eveninchur
ch.Ihad
t
oswi
tchoffmyphoneall
becauseofyou.
”
Thewhi
tedogranfr
om behi
ndt
hehouse,
Ema
scr
eamedgrabbi
ngRona’
st-
shi
rt
.
“
Hedoesn’
tbi
te.
”
“
Ngngt
lher
rawenagethi
m awayf
rom me.
”
“
Scooby
!”Hewhi
stl
edt
hent
hedogshooki
tst
ail
t
ryi
ngt
ocl
i
mbRona.
“
He’
shar
mless.Hedoesn’
tbi
te.
”
“
Iam scar
edofdogs,
geti
tawayf
rom me.
”
“
Q,comegetScooby
.”
Qwalkedoutwit
hSar onacr
awli
ngbehi
nd.Ema
smi
l
edasQr anoverandhuggedher
.
“
Whatdi
dyoubr
ingme?
”
Emalaughedt
hent
ookoutal
oll
i
popf
rom herbag.
“Ther
e.”
“
Thanky
ou!
”
Hewalkedawaywi
thscoobyt
henEmangpi
cked
Sasa.
“
Hey
…”
Sasasmil
edst
ari
ngather
.Ronagoti
nsi
det
he
house.
“
Comei
n.”
Emangf
oll
owedbehi
ndandsmi
l
edatt
hei
rnanny
.
“
Hi.Howar
eyou?
”
“
Iam f
inemam y
our
sel
f?”
“
Cal
lmeEma,
youwanther
?”
“
Yes.
”
Emahandedt
hebabythenpi
ckedWar
onaandlast
Lar
onawhoseemedtobeheavi
ert
hanthegi
rl
s.
“
Comet
hissi
de…”
Sheputthebabydownandf
oll
owedhi
mtot
he
backy
ard.Emasmiled.
“
Wow!
”
“
Sitdown.
”
Shetookoffherf
li
pflopsandsatdownwi t
hasmi
l
e.
Shepickedthest
rawberr
ythendippedi
tinthe
cr
eam andtookabite.
“
All
thi
sforaf
ri
end?
”
Ronal
aughedsi
tt
ingwi
thher
.“Wi
ne?
”
“
Yespl
ease.Thi
sisbeaut
if
ul.Don’
tgetmeusedt
o
i
t.
”
“
Ther
eismor
ewher
ethatcomesf
rom.
”
Shelookedathim wit
hasmi l
eimpressedathowf ar
hehadwental loutf
orher.Therewasev er
yr eason
whysheshoul dhaveref
usedt ocomebutt hereshe
was,beingenti
cedbyamanwhowasmostpr obabl
y
goi
ngt obreakherheart
,crushitmaybe.
Ronal ookedather.“
Let’senj
oythiswithoutover
thi
nking.Youwer eri
ght,Ihadti
met othinkabout
every
thingyousaidy ester
dayandIam goi ngt
otalk
toher.Closethatchapterinmylif
eandmov eon.
Todayl et
’sj
ustenjoythisasfr
iends.
”
Emasmi
l
ed.“
Ok.Agr
eed.
”

*
**

Justbefor
eduskhoursl
ater
,Kennydr
ovein
Gaborone,herhear
twaspoundi
ng.Herphoner
ang
thenshepicked.
“
Esi
..
”
“
Iam dr
ivi
nghome,
dowhaty
oumust
.”
“
Ok.Wewi
l
ltal
k.”
“
Shar
p.”
Esitookaturnbehi
ndKenny.Shesi gheddri
vi
ngto
Rona’shouse.Herpalmswerenowsweat y
.She
droveinhi
sstreett
hendroveinthroughtheopen
gateparki
ngbehindthenav
ybl uebenz.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#91

Justbefor
eduskhoursl
ater
,Kennydr
ovein
Gaborone,herhear
twaspoundi
ng.Herphoner
ang
thenshepicked.
“
Esi
..
”
“
Iam dr
ivi
nghome,
dowhaty
oumust
.”
“
Ok.Wewi
l
ltal
k.”
“
Shar
p.”
Esitookaturnbehi
ndKenny.Shesi gheddri
vi
ngto
Rona’shouse.Herpalmswerenowsweat y
.She
droveinhi
sstreett
hendroveinthroughtheopen
gateparki
ngbehindthenav
ybl uebenz.
KennylookedattheBenzcuriously
.Coulditbeone
ofhisbrot
her’
s?Sheshruggedt aki
ngadeepbr eath
thentookourhersmallmirr
orandl ookedathersel
f.
Shesighedthenputonherredcapov erherl
onghair
andsteppedoutofthecar.Herkneesgotweakwi t
h
eachstepshetooktowardsthedoor .Shetooka
deepbr eat
hstandingatthedoor,herhear
tbeat
ing
sof astandhardagainstherchest
.Shefound
herselfgoi
ngthroughthesessionsshehadhadat
Sbranat ocal
m herself
.
“ComeonKenny…y oucandot hi
s…yougoingto
Sbranawasagooddecision.Youdi
ditfory
ourkids.
Takeadeepbreat
handf acethemusic.
”
Shecouldhearv oi
cesinthehouse,asmilegrewon
herfaceasshel i
stenedtoQlaugh.Noonecoul d
l
aughl i
kehim.Shechuckledlist
eni
ngharderthen
tookadeepbr eathandknockedonthedoor .She
steppedbackhear i
ngfootst
epsapproachthedoor.
At hi
ckmaturewomanopened.
“
Dumel
ang…”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Dumel
ang,
canIpl
easecomei
n.”
Wazhaimmediatel
yrecognizedthebeauti
ful
woman,
shewasthewomani nthepi ctur
esQhadshownher .
Themothertothetr
ipl
ets.Nowshecoul dseewhere
Sasagothersmil
efrom, matteroff
act,
Sasalooked
l
ikeaminicopyofhermot her.
“
MmagweboSasa?
”
Kennychuckl
ed.“
Eemma.Howdi
dyouknow?
”
“Qalwayst
alksaboutyou.Youknowhehasbeen
prayi
ngyoustar
tli
ki
ngt hem t
hencomeback
becausehereal
l
ymi ssesyou.
”
“
Wel
l
,hi
spr
ayer
shav
ebeenanswer
ed.
”
“
Youcancomein,
Iam sorr
ykegor
eomont
le.(
it
’s
j
ustt
haty
ouarebeaut
if
ul.
)”
Kennyshy
lysmi
l
ed.“
Thanky
ou.Yourname?
”
“
Wazha.Comei
n.”
Shewal kedinthensmi ledstari
ngatthekidsont he
blanketonthefloor.Shest oodther
ewatchingt he
kidsshehadgi venbirt
ht o.Thekidsshehadspent9
hoursinlabourfor.Theywer esobeauti
ful,
she
slowlywalkedov ertothem andkneltdownpi cking
thegirl
.
“
Sar
ona…”
Tearsrol
leddownKenny’scheekasshesatonher
butt.War
onacr awl
edover.Kennyr
eachedforher
tr
yingnottobreaki
ntoaloudsob.Wazhawat ched
fr
om adistanceasLarr
ylookedathismother
, atoy
onhismout
h.Kennyr
eachedov
erandpul
l
edhi
m
cl
oser.
“
Mybabi
es…GodifInev
ersai
dthanky
ouf
orgi
ve
me…t
hankyou…”
Qwalkedfr
om hi
sroom hol
dingadi
apert
hen
dr
oppedit
,hisey
esfal
l
ingonKenny.
“
MAMA!
”
Kennyputthetr
ipl
etsdowngett
ingupasQr
anov
er.
Shepickedhi
m upashecried.
“
Iam sor
rymybaby
…Iam sor
ry…Iam sososor
ry.
”
Sheputhim downkneeli
ngdownbeforehim and
huggedhim asthecapfel
l.“
Iam sor
ry…Idi
dn’t
meanit…Iloveyousosomuch.Youar emywor ldI
wil
lneverhateyou.Il
oveyoumorethananyt
hing.I
wassickandI …Iam sor
ry.
”
Qhel
dhert
ight
lycr
ying.
“
Youl
eftus.
”
“Iwi
ll
neverl
eav
eyou…Iwi
l
lnev
erl
eav
eyouagai
n.I
promi
se.
”
Theyheldeachotherf
orawhi
l
east
het
ri
plet
sjust
watchedconfused.
“
Ilov
eyou…”
Qlookedathismot
hercr
yingt
henl
aughedwi
ping
awayhistear
s.
“
Youl
ookugl
ywhencr
ying.
”
Kennyl
aughedt
ryi
ngtopul
lhersel
ftoget
herbut
seei
ngal
lherki
dslef
therf
eel
ingemot i
onal
.
“
Didy
ouseet
heki
ds?
”
Kennysmil
edt
earful
lynoddi
ng.“
Idi
d.Theyar
e
beaut
if
ular
en’
tthey?
”
“
Yes.Theycancr
awl
andwal
kbutj
ustabi
t.
”
“That’
snice.”Kennysatdownandpulledal
lofthem
closer
.War onaandLaronalookedli
kethei
rfat
her
butSaronat ookaft
erhermostly.
“
Mamai
sback…”
Qpi
ckedt
hedi
aperandgav
eitt
ohi
smot
her
.
“
Wawamessedherdi
aper
.”
“
Ok.
”
Wazhawat chedandsni f
fedfeeli
ngemot i
onal.The
re-uni
onwasj ustbeaut
if
ultowat chbutaboveall,
theenergyinthehousehadj ustchanged.Sheslowly
satdownasKennychangedherdaught er
’sdi
aper
thenkissedhercheeks.
“
All
clean.Howi
sst
andar
d1buddy
?”
“
It
’sni
ce.
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Doy
oumi
ssMsBoo?
”
“
Yesbutnott
hatmuch.Myt
eacheri
sreal
l
yni
ce
t
oo.
”
“That’
sni
ce.Doyousti
ll
comebackwi
thadi
rt
y
unif
ormlooki
ngcrazy
?”
Ql
aughed.“
No.
”
“Whydi
dyoulaugh?Youar
ely
ing.Il
i
key
ourhai
rcut
.
Youcl
eanandgrown.”
“
Arey
ougoi
ngt
ost
ayher
e?”
Sheshookherhead.“
Notnow,Iam goi
ngt
omy
housefi
rst
.Youguyswil
lvi
sitt
her
e.”
“Iwanttostaywit
hyouandthetri
plet
s.Daddywi
l
l
stayther
etoo.Justl
i
kebefor
e.”
“
Wewi
l
lsee.
”
“
Yourhai
risr
eal
l
ylong.
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Thanks.Doesi
tlookgoodonme?
”
“
Youar
ebeaut
if
ul.
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Thanksmyboy
.”
KennychuckledasWar onavomit
edonherhoodi e.
Shetookitoffremai
ningwit
hhert-shir
t.Shewiped
herdaughter
’smouththensighedlooki
ngaround
wit
hasmi le.
“
Who’
scari
sout
side?
”
“
Oh…aunt
yEma.
”
Kennyf
rownedst
ari
ngathi
m.“
Who’
sthat
?”
“
Sheisanur
seatthehospi
tal
daddyt
akest
he
t
ri
plet
swhentheyar
esick.
”
Kenny
’shear
tst
art
edpoundi
ng.
“
Issheher
e?”
“
Yes,
theyar
eout
sidet
alki
ng.
”
“
Out
sidewher
e?”
“
Att
heback.
”
Kennytookadeepbr
eathintr
yingtocal
m downbut
shecouldfeel
her
sel
fshaki
ngwi t
hanger.
“
Ok…doessheal
way
scomeher
e?”
“No.It
’sherf
irstt
ime.Sheisr
eal
l
ynice.Sheal
ways
smilesandshealwaysgivesmeasweet.Youwil
l
alsoli
keher.
”
Kennytookyetanot
herdeepbr
eath,
herangersky
rocket
ingev
enmor e.Shewasact
uall
yshaki
ngwith
anger.
“
Oh…i
sshepr
ett
y?”
Wazhachuckl
edt
henKennyt
urnedt
oherwi
tha
smi
le.
“
Ismyr
epl
acementpr
ett
ynemmaWazha?
”
Wazhashruggedwi
thasmil
e.“
Sheis.Butnotl
i
ke
you,
inherownwaysheispr
ett
y.”
“
Ehe…Wazhawee,
remai
nwi
thmyki
dswhi
l
eIt
alk
t
omymansoIcanunderstandwhat
’sgoi
ngon.Let
meunder
standwhoEmais.
”
“
Eemma.
”
“
Byt
heway,youaret
henannywhohel
pedhi
m si
nce
t
hef
ir
stdayr
ight
?”
“
Eemma.
”
“
Thankyousomuch.Obot
hokwa.(
youar
e
i
mport
ant.
)”
Kenny’
sphoner
angasshest
oodup.Shepi
cked
Esi
’scal
l.
“
Howi
sitgoi
ng?Iam dy
ingwi
thcur
iousoi
ty.
”
“Gtawet
henur
sei
sinmyhouse.Ihav
eseent
he
kids.
”
“
Iny
ourhousewher
e?”
‘
Att
hebackwi
thRona.
”
“Kenny…IknowIsai
df i
ghtf
oryourmanbutpl
ease
don’tgot
ojail
.Youcan’
taff
ordgoi
ngtoj
ail
.”
“
Justr
elax,
noonei
sgoi
ngt
ojai
l
.”
“
Don’
tfi
ghtany
one.Fi
ghtsmar
tl
y,notphy
sical
l
y.”
“
Rel
ax.
”
“Ei
sh,
nowIam worr
ied.Myhouseisal
way
sopen.
Youcansl
eepher
eatmyhouse. ”
“
Iam sl
eepi
ngher
ewi
thmyki
dst
oday
.Iwi
l
lcal
l
y
ou.
”
“
Eish…”
Kennyhungupandputherponedown.Wazhaput
herhandsonherlapandwat chedherwal koutusing
thebackdoori
nherwhitet-shirt
.Shet ookadeep
breat
hopeningthebackdoorandwal kedout .Her
eyesfel
lonRonawhowasl yingont het hrowthat
waslaidonthelawnwithaf emal ecompani onwhile
theyl
aughedatsomething.Thef emal ecompani on
l
ookedatherthenRonaal sot ur
nedandl ookedat
herassheclosedthedoor.
“
Gomonat eebi
lelatshega,l
etshegang?(I
t’
sni
ce
youar
eevenlaughing,whatareyoulaughi
ngat
?)I
wantt
olaughtoo.
”
Ronagotup.“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”
“It
oldyouIwascomi
ng,
whatdoy
oumean‘
what
am Idoi
nghere?
’”
“
Don’
tyouknowhowt
ocal
l
?Iam busy
.”
“It
oldy
ouIwascomi ngRona.Who’
sthi
s?Keene
nnesewagago?(
Issheyournur
se?)
”
“
Iam busywewi
l
ltal
ktomor
row.
”
“MmekanaIam al
readyher
eandIam notgoi
ng
any
where.
”
“IsaidIam busy,
wewi l
ltal
ktomorr
ow.Youj ust
don’tupandleavethenexpectt
ojustcomeback
uninvit
edl
ikeacockroach.Kebusy,wewil
ltalk
tomor r
ow.Leave.
”
Emashookherhead.“
Noi
t’
sfi
neRona.Iwi
l
lleav
e.”
“Youarenotgoi nganywher
eEma.Sheisleavi
ng.
Shecan’tjustcomeandexpecttheworl
dtobowat
herfeetbecausemi ght
yKennyhasfi
nal
lydeci
dedt o
comeback.I t’
snothappeni
ng.Getout
,wewi l
ltal
k
tomorrow.”
“
Heela,l
esaWakhandawamodimoatsamay
e.(
Let
Wakhandago.
)Iam notgoi
ngany
where.
”
Emachuckl
ed.“
Whatdi
dyoucal
lme?
”
Kennyl
ookedather.“
Don’
tyoudar
e,t
akey
our
behi
ndandleav
e.”
“Youknowwhat
…Idon’
thav
eti
mef
ort
his
nonsense.
”
Sheputonhershoes.
“Ehtsamaya,dotheyteachy
outorunaroundwit
h
yourpati
ent
sandf uckthem?Youshoul
dgetfi
red,o
desperat
egore.
”
Emal aughed.“Theonl ydesperatepersonIcansee
hereisyou.Idon’ tevenknowwhyy ouarefighti
ng
withmeasi fIdi dsomet hi
ngtoy oubutIthinkyou
areinti
midated.Yout houghtwheny oubacky ou
wouldfindev ery
thingwai t
ingforyou.Hunny,save
yoursel
ftheener gy,Iam notthetypey ouarguewit
h,
Iam wayabov eyourleague.Knowy ourt
argets.
”
Kennypausedt henl
aughed.“Youarewayabov e
who’sl
eaguewenabl ackmamba?Looki nglikeKing
Kong,wareleague?Leagueyaengt ot
awena, don’t
makemel augh.AndhunnyIam f arfr
om being
desper
ate,t
hisismyf amil
y.Those4kidsinside
t
her
e,t
heyar
emi
ne!
”
“Youmeant
heki
dsyouabandoned.Wai
tsedi
bit
ter
babymamalal
api
sa.(
Bit
terbabymamasare
ti
ri
ng.
)”
“Bit
terwhat ?Iam farfrom bei ngbi tt
er,Ihaveno
reasontobebi tter,
theonl yt hingmaki ngmebi t
teri
s
yourhugel i
ps.Ot amet samot hokana.Oi sakae
melomoy emoki makimay aana?( Youwi ll
swal l
ow
someone.Wher ear eyut akingt hosebigl i
ps?)
Gatwebi t
ter?Lov edoIl ookl ikeabi t
terbabymama
toyou?Icandr awy ourfacewi thmyl efthand
desperatebitch.Talki
ngaboutbei ngintimidatedby
you?Whodoy ouintimidate?Youmeanot her
goril
laswhichlookl i
key ou?I fIdi dn’
tknowbet t
erI
wouldmi stakey ouforchar coal .Gatwei nt
imidated?
”
Ronaangr
il
ylookedatKenny“
Getout
!”
Emasmi ledstar
ingather.“
Iwasgoingtowal kaway
butIhavedecidedtogiveRonaachance,Iam doing
i
tt oputyouinyourplaceonl
y.Iam goi
ngt oshow
youthatnoteveryoneisawalkover
.Yout hinkso
highl
yofy our
selfmmeIam goingtobringy oudown
toyourlevel.Goonandt hrowi nsul
ts,i
tsimply
showsy ouhav eprobl
emswi thyoursel
fbecausenna
hunnyIknowIam beaut iful.Youarenotthet ypeto
breakmewi thwor dsbutthisshowsmet haty ouare
verychil
dish..Youf i
ndpoweri nusinghurtf
ulwords.
Whaty oushoul dknowi sthatwor dscan’tbreak.
Thereisnot hingyoucansayt omet hathasn’tbeen
saidbefore.Iam goingtot eachy oualessonnnaka.
Waitandwat ch.”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#92

Emat
urnedt
oRonaandsmi
l
ed.
“
Iam goi
ng,
ther
esti
supt
oyou.
”
“
Don’
tgoy
et.
”
“Ihavet opr epareforwork.Wewi ll
talk.Behonest
withy ourself.That’
stheleastyoucando.Ihav e
nothingt olosei fy
ouchooseher .”Shekissedhis
cheekt henpi ckedherphoneandwal kedpastRona
getti
ngi nsidet hehouse.ShelookedatQandt he
babies.
“
Guy
s,Iam goi
ng.
”
Qlookedatherwi
thasmi
l
e.“
Didy
ouseemy
mommy ?”
Emasmi
l
ed.“
Yes.
”
“
Shei
sbeaut
if
ul.It
oldy
ou.
”
“
Shei
s.”
“
Shei
snev
ergoi
ngt
ogo.
”
Emalookedathi
m andsmi
l
ed.“
Iam happyf
ory
ou.
Bye…”
“
Bye!
”
Shesmi
l
edatWazha.“
Bye!
”
“
Bye.
”

Ronaangr
il
ylookedatKenny
.
“
Whatt
hef
uckwast
hat
?”
Kennyf
oldedherarmsst
ari
ngathi
m.“It
oldy
ouI
wascoming.Di
dy oudot
hatonpur
pose?”
“
Dowhatonpurpose?Ket
lagocl
apaKennywai
tse?
Ont
lwaet
swakeng?”
“
Youbr
oughtt
hatugl
y-
“
Ronagav
eherahotsl
apshefeltherwhol
echeek
bur
nasblooddr
oppedfr
om hernose.
“
Ont
lwaet
swakeng?Ot
lal
elakana.
”
“
Iam goi
ngt
orepor
tyou.
”
“Howdar eyout al
ktoherli
kethat
?YoumustthingI
am fool,r
eadyt ot
akeyoubackafteryou
disappearedfor9months!Ninemonths?Whothe
fuckdoy outhinkyouare?
”
“
Ifshei
sugl
y-
“
Ronasl
appedheragai
n.“
Ifshei
swhat
?”
Shebitherl
owerl
ipstar
ingathi
m,bot
hhercheeks
bur
ninghot.“
Iam goi
ngtorepor
tyout
othepoli
ce.
”
“Ikeptqui
etwhenyouabusedmykids,
Ikeptqui
et
wheny ouspoketomehowev ery
ouwantedbutyou
aregoingfarnow.
”
“
Yout
hinkbeat
ingmewi
l
lmakeherpr
ett
y?”
“
Shehasabeaut
if
ulhear
t,somet
hingy
ouseem t
o
l
ack.
”
“
Somet
hingIl
ack?
”
“Yesandy oumightnotseeherbeaut
ybecauseyou
arejeal
ousethatsomeonecanactual
lyr
eplacey
ou.”
Kennywi pedhernosewiththebackofherhand.
“Feeljeal
ousforwhat?ForthatKi
ngKong?Wa
nyatsa,Iwil
lneverf
eelj
ealousfort
hatgor
il
lalooki
ng
-
“
Ronagav
eheranot
hersl
ap,
Kennyputherhandson
herf
acecry
ing.
“
Fucky
ou!
”
Hegr
abbedherbyherl
onghersl
appi
ngheragai
n.
“Iam goingtoputyouinyourpl
acetoday.Whodo
youthinkyouaretalki
ngtooref
ucky ou?Ketl
i
lego
gorotamai t
seo.(Iam goi
ngtoteachyoumanners.
)”
“
Q!”
Withthebackofhishand,heangr
il
ysmackedherso
hardshefel
tdizzyasshestagger
edback.Qopened
thedoorandlookedathismother
.
“
Mama…”
“
Shei
scomi
ngbuddy
,geti
nsi
de.
”
Kennyl
ookedhersoncr
ying.“
Q…come…”
“Qui
nton,goinsi
det
hehouse.Mommyanddaddy
arest
il
ltalki
ng.
”
Ql
ookedathi
sfat
herwhowassmi
l
ing.“
Ohok.
”
Herushedbackinsi
det
hehouseasKennyt r
ied
wal
kingaway.Ronapul
ledherbyherhai
r.
“Wher eareyougoi
ng?Youthi
nky
oucancompar
e
met hatfuckert
hencometomyhouseandi
nsul
tmy
gir
lf
riend?”
“
Iwantt
ogo.
”
“Youarenotgoingt
il
lyouunder
standwhoIam
Kenei
lwe.Otli
l
egony el
a,ontwaelamasepawena.
”
Kennyscr eamedf orsomeonet oheart henRona
smackedheragai nthatshel ostbalancef al
ling.He
grabbedoneoft hecushionshehadbeenusi ngwit
h
Emaandpr essedi tonherface.Kennyki ckedher
l
egst ryi
ngt ogetawayscr atchinghim buthe
pressedonherf acehar derforacoupl emor e
seconds.Shef oughthar dertryi
ngtogetaway
suffocat
ingwi t
ht hepill
owonherf acetillsheslowly
stopped.Ronat ookof fthepill
owsat i
sfiedt hen
l
ookedather .
“
Iwi
l
lki
l
lyouwena.Ont
lwaet
swakengKenei
l
we?
”
Hepausedasshej
ustl
aidt
her
ethenhesl
appedher
cheek.
“
Iam notpl
ayi
ngwi
thy
ou,
Iam t
alki
ngt
oyou.
”
Sher
emai
nedl
yi
ngst
il
l.
“
Kenny
!”
Heshookherasshel
aynotmovi
ng,hereyesclosed.
Hefrownedst
ari
ngatherf
orawhi
lethenstar
ted
pani
cking.
“
Fuck!Kenny
!Shi
tshi
t!Babe!
”
Panickingheputhi shandsonherchestdoi
ng
compr essionsthenpauseddoingmouthtomouth,
hishear tbeat
ingsofast.Hisphoner
angthenhe
reachedf orit
,handsshaking.
“
Hel
l
o?”
At
sil
echuckl
ed.“
Hey
,isEmat
henur
sest
il
lther
e?”
“
Ithi
nkIki
l
ledKenny
.”
At
sil
epaused.“
Huh?
”
“Shejustcamebackandwasr udetoEma, y
ouknow
howshei s.Isl
appedheracoupleofti
mesthen
pressedthepi l
l
owt oherf
acetojustscar
ebutshei
s
notmov ingnow. ”
“Youwhat
?Whywoul
dyousuf
focat
eherwi
tha
pil
low?
”
“
Ijustwant
edt
oscar
eher
.”
“
Dochestcompressi
ons.Iam comi
ng.Inev
erknew
y
ouhatedhert
ot hepoi
ntofkil
li
ngher
.”
“Fuckyou!Thel
astt
hingIwi
l
lfeel
fort
hiswomani
s
hate!
”
“
Dochestcompr
essi
ons.Iam comi
ng.
”
Ronadroppedthephoneandcont
inuedpr
essi
ngher
chest
,feart
ri
ckli
ngdownhisspi
ne.

*
**

Atsi
l
eputonhi
sshoesasApr
ill
ookedathi
m
conf
usedi
nhersexywear
.
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
Helookedather.“
Maatlaneedshelpwi
thhi
scar
.I
wi
ll
bebackj ustnow.Iam sorr
y.”
“Real
l
ynowAtsi
l
e?Can’
tyouhel
phi
mtomor
row?
Thisi
sourt
ime.
”
“
Comeonbabe,
Iwi
l
lbebacki
naf
ewmi
nut
es.
”
“
Idr
essedupf
ory
ou.
”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Ij
o!”
Heki
ssedher
.“Iam comi
ng.
”
Shel
ookeddownupset.Her
ushedoutandj
umped
i
nhiscart
hespedoff
.

*
**

Emadr ov
einthroughhergatethensatinhercarfor
acoupleofsecondsthi
nki
ngofwhathadhappened.
Shefoundhersel
fsmili
ngrecall
ingthelong
conver
sati
onshehadbeenhav i
ngwi t
hRonabefore
hi
sbabymamacame.Shel ookedatherphonethen
shookherhead.Shewouldgivehimt i
met odeal
wit
hherbeforeshecouldcall
,mat t
eroffact
,she
wouldwaitforhimt ocall
.Shedidn’
twantasi
tuat
ion
wherehefeltpressuredthenchoseheronl
ytogo
backtohisbabymamabutnowshecoul d
underst
andhishat eforher.
Thewomanwast oxi
c,shef oundhersel
ffeel
ing
sor
ryforthekids.Shecoul dn’
timaginehowitfel
tto
haveanunreli
ablemot herwhocoul djustwakeup
onedaythenleave.Shest eppedoutofhercarand
walkedi
nsideherhouset hent ookherphoneand
cal
ledhersist
er.
“
Ema…”
“
Ithi
nkIam f
all
i
ngf
ort
hisguy
.”
“
Who?
”
“
Rona.
”
“
No!
”
Emal aughedwalki
ngtoherki
tchenthenopenedher
fr
idgeandt ookoutabot
tl
eofwat er
.
“Iknow…t her
eissomethingabouthim.Heisnotl
i
ke
otherguys.Heissmart,
hecanhol ddownan
i
ntell
igentconver
sat
ionwithoutt
alki
ngabouta
rel
ati
onship.Whenhesaidwewoul dhavelunchas
fri
endsIthoughthewasjustsayi
ngsothatIcanjust
comebuthewasl i
kemyf ri
end.Heissmartandthe
wayhelaughs…Emi sang,It
hinkIam f
all
i
ngi nl
ove.”
“
Whatabouthi
sbabymama?
”
“Shecamewhi leIwasenj oyingt heconv er
sation,I
haveheardofbi tterbabymamasbutt hatone…she
takesthetrophy.Shei ssof ullofherselfandthinks
thewor l
drev ol
vesar oundher .Shecamei n
expecti
ngt heguyt or ol
lov erf i
rherherandwor shi
p
her.Whenhest oodhi sgroundt ell
inghertogoback
becausehewasbusyandt hatt heywoul dtalk
tomorrow, shestartedtalkingasi fsheownshi m.
From t
her eshecal l
smeWakhanda. ”Emal aughed
asEmi joi
nedi n.
“
What
?”
“Hela,shel
it
eral
l
ycall
edmeWakhanda, Icouldsee
shewasl ooki
ngforafightandnoonewasgi v
ingit
toher,shegoesaheadandsay sIam desperate,
heweheweam It aughttorunaft
ermypat i
entsand
fuckthem.Shegoesof fcal
li
ngmenames, ebi
leo
mpolaaar
eIam Ki
ngKong.Wai
atsethisgi
rl
.She
sai
dshecandr
awmewi thherl
efthand”
“
Youl
i
e!”
“Tl
hammat hi
st i
mear oundshei sgoingt olearn.I
am goingt ogiveRonaachancei fhewant sme.I
l
ov ehiskids,IthinkIam fall
ingforhim sowhynot ?I
wantt oalsoteacht hebabymamat hatjustbecause
youhav ekidswi thhim doesn’tmeanhehast oend
upwi t
hy ou.Somet i
mesal l
youwi ll
endupbei ngis
theincubatorthatgav ehim kids.
”
Emisanglaughed.“
Haaai
butt
hatsoundsl
i
ke
dr
ama. ”
“ShewantsdramabutIam notgoi ngtogiveittoher
.
Iam wayoldert
hant hatspoi
ltgir
landIam goingto
playsmart
.Sheisgoingt odestr
oyhersel
fthatwhen
Iam done,shewil
ltell
thenextwomant hatbeinga
babymamadoesn’ tmeanshi t.
”
“
Idon’
tknowhey
,butbecar
eful
.”
“
Iwi
l
l.
”
Shewal
kedt
ohersi
tt
ingr
oom andsatdown
openi
ngherwat
er.
“
Herpoweri
shert
ongue.Whatshedoesn’
tknowi
s
t
hatwor
dsmeannothi
ngtome.”
“
Key
ell
owbor
n?”
“Notexactl
y.Sheisj
ustoneofthosepeoplewho
thi
nkjustbecausesheisbeaut
if
ul,shehastoget
anythi
ngshewant s.
”
“Isti
l
l don’tunder
standwhypeopleuseourski
n
colorst oatt
ackus,theydon’
tknowweareproudi
n
ourski ns.
”
“
Theydon’
tknowt
hatourski
ngl
owsl
i
kedi
amonds!
”
Theybot
hl aughed.“Buthel
akemonohel aEmi.Iam
l
ocalmygi r
l.Iam goingtodealwit
hher
.Shethinks
sheisal
lthatbutshei snot
hing.
”
“
YeswenaEma!
”
Emal
aughedandcont
inuedchat
ti
ngwi
thhersi
ster
.

*
**
At
sil
edroveinsi
dehi sbr
other
’syar
dthenquickl
y
st
eppedoutandr ushedi
nsidethehouse.Hesmiled
st
ari
ngatthekids.
“
Heyguy
s!”
“
Hiuncl
e…”
“
Wher
eisy
ourdad?
”
Qpoint
edatt
hebackdoor
,hisey
esont heTV.
Wazhawal
kedovert
ohim andsighed.
“Ihear
dscr
eams.I
tsoundedasi
fmmagweQwas
cryi
ng.
”
“Iam sur
et heyarejusthavi
ngoneoft heir
arguments.RonaandKennyar ealwaysliket
his,
don’tworry
.Letmet al
ktothem,gonwebadi di
metsi
kagorebany obana.(Maybetheyarequietbecause
theyarefucking.)
”
Wazhalaughedwalkingaway.Atsi
lewal kedout
t
hroughthebackdoorandlookedatRonasweat i
ng
whil
etr
yingtorevi
veKenny.Atsil
efelthiskneesgo
weakashel ookedatKennylyi
nglif
eless.
“
Hol
yfuck!
”
“
Comeandhel
pme!Iam scar
ed.
”
“
Dir
amout
htomout
hwhi
l
eIdot
hecompr
essi
ons.
”
Hekneltdownbef
oreKennyandl
ookedather
swol
lenface.
“
Whatt
hef
uckwer
eyoudoi
ngt
oher
?”
“
Hel
pme!
”
At
sil
estart
edthechestcompressi
onswhil
eRona
di
dmout htomouthbutnothi
ngwashappening.
At
sil
elookedatRona,nowshakingtoo.
“
Weshouldtakehertot
hehospi
tal
.Ican’
tbel
i
eve
y
ouhavekil
l
edy ourwomanforatwominut
es
f
lame!
”
.
.
Li
keandcommentassoonasy
our
eadsowehav
e
anot
herbonusqui
ckl
y.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#93

Wazhawhohadbeenst andingbythedoorwat
chi
ng
wentbackinsi
det hehouset hencamebackwitha
bucketf
ullwit
hcol dwater.ShepushedRonaoutof
herwayandspl ashedthecol dwat
eronKenny’
sface.
Kennygaspedandwokeupcoughi ng.
“
Shehadpassedout
.”
At
sil
eknel
tbef
oreherasshecoughed.“
Hey
…”
KennylookedatRonaandstar
tedcry
ing.“
Iam
repor
ti
ngy out
othepoli
ce.Youaregoingt
ojai
l.
”
Ronasighedwit
hrel
iefsi
tti
ngdownonthelawn.Q
walkedoutandl
ookedatalloft
hem wit
hcuri
osit
y.
WazhalookedatRonadisappoi
ntedt
henwalked
overtohi
m.
“
Let
’sgoi
n,y
oucan’
tleav
etheki
dsal
one.
”
“
What
’swr
ongwi
thmama?
”
“
Not
hing.Shei
scomi
ng.
”
At
sil
ehel
pedKennyupandf
ixedherhai
r.
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Iam repor
ti
nghim.Heisgoi
ngtojai
l
.Hetr
iedt
oki
l
l
meforhisKingKongl
ooki
nggir
lf
ri
end.”
Atsi
lel
ookedatherunder
standingt
heser
iousness
ofthei
ssuebutfai
ledandlaughed.
“
KingKong?
”
Kennytur
nedthentookQ’shandwalkingi
nsidethe
house.Wazhalookedatthet
wobr ot
hersagainand
fol
lowedaft
erKenny.Atsi
lel
ookedathisbr
ot her
.
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evey
oudi
dthat
.”
“
Ican’
ttoo.
”
“Iam surefr
om hereonshewon’
tbothery
ou.You
cannowbehappywi thKi
ngKongbutyouaregoi
ng
tojai
lifsherepor
tsyou.
”
Feel
i
ngweak,
Ronar
anhi
stongueonhi
sdr
yli
ps.
“
Itwasn’
tsupposedt
ogett
hatf
ar.
”
“
Soi
t’
sreal
l
yov
erbet
weeny
out
wo?
”
Ronaputhi
shandsov
erhi
sface.
“
Didsheexpl
ainwher
eshewas?
”
Heshookhi
shead.“
No.
”
“Ah…Idon’ tknownow.May bei t
’sgoodt haty outwo
arebr eakingupbutIr eall
yloveKennyf oryou.When
youmett hatgirlshewasi nnocent .Youknowt hat.
Youknowshel ov esy ou,t
hehor moneswer e
probabl ymessi ngwi thher,whatdi dApr i
lcallit…uhh
prenat aldepressi onandpost natal depr ession.Iread
abouti tandi tmadesense.Kennywasn’ tli
ket hat
thenshesuddenl ychanged.Ifshedi dn’tlovey ou
shewoul dhav enev ertakenyouback.Womencan’ t
pretendt ol ovey ouwhent heydon’ t.Youf ailedto
seei t
.Ev eryonef ailedtoseei tandmay beitwas
goodt hatshewentawaybecausei fshedi dn’tshe
woul dhav eprobabl yhurtthebabi es.Shedi dn’tpush
j
usty ouaway , shepushedev eryoneawayandy ou
knowhowEsi andKennyar eclose.Shepushedher
ownf ami lyaway .Shepr obablyfeltalone.
Honest l
y…”At silesighed.“Kennyi sy ourgi rl
.That
crushy ouhav eont hatnurseispoi ntless.Kennyi s
yourwoman, youknowi t,
everyonedoes.What
happenedtoday…Idon’ tknowbutmay bei t
’sti
me
youactual
lyconsideredfamilyther
apy.Fixyour
mess,stopputti
ngt hekidsthroughshitandjustf
ix
yourmess.”
Ronasi
ghedl
i
steni
ng.
“Imagi nethet i
mey ouspendinsul
ti
ngeachother
shoul dbet hetimey oushoul
dbespendingdoing
thingst ogether.Yourl
ovewasbeautif
ulbutnowitis
get t
ingt ai
ntedwi t
hsuchnonsense.Anyways,att
his
momenty ouar egoingt
ojail
.Bett
erbeprepar
edto
apologi zeandmakesur eshefeel
ssorr
yforyou.”

*
**

KennyhuggedQi
nsi
det
hehouse.
“
Iam goi
ngt
osl
eepwi
thaunt
yEsi
.”
“Butyoucansl
eepher
e,onmybed.Pl
easedon’
tgo.
IpromiseIwi
ll
-“
“Q…Iam notgoi
ngawayfr
om y
ouguy s,
Iam j
ust
goi
ngtofindapl
acetosl
eept
onight
.”
“
Ther
eisspaceonmybed.
”
Ronawal
kedi
nsidethehouse.“
Youcansl
eepher
e.I
wil
lgot
oAtsi
l
e’shouse.Q,seeyout
omorr
ow.”
“
Iam goi
ngt
orepor
tyou.
”
Hewal kedoutt
henAt
sil
elookedatKenny
’sswol
l
en
cheeks.
“Iam r
eall
ysorr
y.Byt
heway,Idon’
tsuppor
twhat
happenedtodayandwhat
everdeci
siony
outakeI
support
.”
Kennynodded.
At
sil
esmi
l
ed.“
Wel
comeback.
”
Hewal
kedoutf
oll
owi
nghi
sbr
other
.
Kennylookedatherchil
drentearf
ull
y.Shehad
almostdiedandshewoul dhaveneverseenher
chil
drenagai
n.Herheartbrokeasshet houghtofi
t
all
,hehadalmostkil
ledherforthenurse.Atear
rol
leddown,Qlookedather .
“
Arey
ouokmama?
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Yes.UhWazha,
youcanshowme
howy
ouhandl
etheset
hreemonkey
s.”
“
Yesmam.
”

*
**

Awhi l
el at
er, Kennyputthechil
dreni ntheircoat
bedst hensighedst ari
ngatSaronawhowasst i
ll
awake.Shel ookedatRona’sbedt henr emov ed
everyt
hingont hebedandputt hecl eansheet sand
beddingbef oretakingherdaughterandl yingbeside
her.I
nt hemoodt oplay,shesl
owl yst oodup
cl
appingherhands.Kennysmi l
edt hent ookher
ri
ngingphone.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
…Ihav
ebeencal
l
ing.
”
“
Heslappedmet
hent
ri
edt
osuf
focat
emet
odeat
h
wi
thapil
low.
”
Sar
onaf
ell
onKenny
’sst
omachgi
ggl
i
ng.
“
What
?Whatdi
dyoudo?
”
“
Ical
l
edhi
sgi
rl
fr
iendKi
ngKong.
”
“
Isshet
hatugl
yory
ouar
ejus-
“
“
Idon’
tknowany
mor
ebutIwantt
oli
ve.Idon’
twant
t
odieyoung.
”
“Whatar
eyougoi
ngt
odo?Ar
eyougoi
ngt
orepor
t
hi
m? ”
“Yes.Itookpictur
es.Ican’tgotothepol icestat
ion
ri
ghtnow.Hewentwi t
hAt sil
esoIam athi shouse
withthekids.Ithi
nkIhav elosthi
m Esi .Ronahas
neverraisedhishandonme.Hel iter
allytir
edtokil
l
me.Iam r eall
yhurt,
myhear ti
sbreakingbutIdon’t
thi
nkf i
ghtingisst
il
lwor t
hi twhenhishear tisno
l
ongeri nit.
”
Esisi
ghed.“IknowRonalovesy ou.Butatt
hesame
ti
me,Ialsofeelyouneedtoreporthim.Hecan’tget
awaywiththis.I
nthenearfutur
ey oumightactual
ly
needthatinyourfav
or.Il
earntthehardway.”
“
Ilov
ehi
m somuch.
”
“Iknow.Il
oveyoutwot
oget
herbutmay
bei
t’
sjust
notmeanttobe.”
“Idon’
tthi
nkit’
smeanttobe.Iam goingtopi
ck
my sel
fupandmov eon.Heisnevergoingtohear
mesayawor dabouthi
sgori
ll
agirl
fr
iendbutsheis
notgoingtogetmykids.
”
“
Iwantt
oseeher
,howugl
yisshe?
”
“
Sheisugl
y.Shesay
sshei
sgoi
ngtoteachmea
l
essonandpul
lmedowntomyl
evel
.”
“Whatlev
el?Sheshouldj
ustr
elaxbecausethi
sman
sheissosureofprobabl
ydoesn’
tevenloveher.
”
“
Hedoes.Hewi
l
lki
l
lforher
.Hel
ovesher
.”
“
Iam sor
rymyl
ove.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
“Tomorrowyourf
irstst
opshoul
dbet
hepol
i
ce
stat
ion.Heshoul
dpayf ori
t.
”
“Yeah…wewi
l
ltal
k.Letmesl
eep.Myheadi
s
aching.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shehungupandpull
edSarona’
slegasshecr
awl
ed
tot
heedgeofthebed.Sheputherbesi
deher
.
“
Sleep.
”
Sasar
eachedf
ort
hephoneandputi
tinhermout
h.
“Ngng, it
s’dirt
y.”Kennytooki tthenSasaf r
owned
abouttocr y.Kennygav eitbackt hesighed.She
l
ookedatherki dsthenslowl ygotoffbedandknel t
downont hefloor.Sheclosedherey esast ear s
roll
eddownhercheeks.Shedi dn’tevenknowwher e
tostartbuthergr andmot heralwayssaidwheny ou
reachtheendandt hereisnoone, t
heonl ythinglef
t
wast urni
ngt oGod, thatprayerwasn’teverythingbut
i
tchangedev erythi
ng.Herl i
pstrembledasshe
foughtnottocr y.
Shetookt
hepil
l
owput t
ingi
tonherfacecryi
ng.I
t
hur
tsomuch,herhear
twasjustbr
eaking.
“Lor
dhelpmewal kaway.Hel
pmemoveon.Help
mebecomeabet terper
son.Hel
pmeaccepti
t.My
hearti
spai
nful
.”

*
**
At
sil
epar
kedi
nfr
ontofahouset
henRonal
ookedat
hi
m.
“
Thanks.
”
“
Whost
aysher
e?”
“
Ema.
”
Atsil
esighedt henRonast eppedoutandwalked
i
nsidethegat e.Atsil
esteppedoutofthecargoing
cl
osertot hegat easRonaknockedont hedoor.
Minuteslaterawomanopenedt hedoorandstepped
out.Hecar ef
ullylookedatherthengotinhi
scarand
droveoffcalli
ngMaat l
a.
“
Iam t
ryi
ngt
ohav
esex,
what
’swr
ongwi
thy
ou?
”
“Doyouknowt
henur
seRonahasbeent
alki
ng
about
?”
“
No,
hav
eyou?
”
“
Yes.Isawhert
oday
,justnow.
”
“
Isshepr
ett
y?”
“
Iguess.Idon’
tknow.Hej
ustt
ri
edt
oki
l
lKenny
momentsback.”
“
Kennyi
sback?
”
“Yeah.Ithi
nkt
heyhadafi
ght
,Ronaslappedherthen
suffocat
edherwi
thapi
ll
owtil
lshepassedout.
”
“
What
?”
“
Yeah…”
“Ei
sh…kanaRonadoesn’ tl
ist
en.Itol
dhimt ogive
Kennyachancet oexpl
ainwhenshecomesback.
Kananowhei sgoi
ngtoloseher,i
tprobablydoesn’
t
occurtohimr i
ghtnowthatheisgoingtoloseKenny
andgettowat chherwit
hanothermakingherhappy .
It
’spainf
ul t
owatchtr
ustmeandgapeshewi l
leven
getprett
ierwit
hthenewguy .
”
“Hejustaskedmet
odr
ophi
m of
fatt
hiswoman’
s
house.”
“Someti
mesy ouhavelear
nthel
essonsoyoucanbe
ablet
oadv i
seyoursonsonedaybutRonawi
llnev
er
recov
erfrom l
osi
ngKenny.”
“
Hei
sgoi
ngt
ojai
lforassaul
t.Shei
srepor
ti
nghi
m.”
“Ithi
nkit
’sti
meIinv
olvebomal
ome.KanaKenny
didn’
tchoosetobesick.
”
“
Shewassi
ck?
”
“Yes,
shewasatSbr ana.Esit
oldme.Iam goingt
o
tal
ktobomalomel epapaandhav eameet i
ngwith
Kenny’
sfami
l
y .Idon’twantRonatoenduplikeme.”

*
**

RonasatonthecouchasEmal
ookedathi
m,
speechl
ess.
“
Wow!
”
“Iam goingtojai
l
, Iknowsheisgoi
ngtor eportme.I
real
l
ydon’ tknowwhatgoti nt
ome.It’
sjustthat
somet i
messhe…. ”Hesighed.
Emasatont
hesi
ngl
ecouchst
ari
ngathi
minsi
l
ence.
“Idon’tknowwhattotel
lyou.Youcoul
dhav
eki
l
led
her.Idon’tl
i
kevi
olentmen.”
Ronasmi
l
edst
ari
ngather
.“I
sthatapoi
ntl
ost
?”
“Yout
ri
edtoki
l
lsomeone.Whowant
stobewi t
h
someonewhocangetangr
ytoapoi
ntoft
ryi
ngto
ki
l
lsomeone.
”
“
Comeher
e,l
etmet
ell
you.
”
Shehesi t
antl
ystoodupandsatbesi dehim.He
smi l
edstari
nginhereyesthenleanedov erand
kissedhergood.Ronakissedherev enmor e
squeezingherbreast
.Emaki ssedhim backashe
tookcontrolandgotontopofheront hecouch, her
cli
tthrobbi
ng.
Heuntiedhergownexposi nghernakedness
beneaththenki
ssedhermor e,histhumbonhercli
t.
Shemoanedsof tl
yinpleasuret henhedropped
ki
ssestoherneck.Everythingabouthim wasat ur
n
on,shefoundhersel
fjudgingher sel
f.Whogot
att
ract
edt oamanwhohadj ustconfessedto
al
mostki l
li
ngsomeone.
Ronapi
ckedherupandl ai
dherdownonhercarpet
.
Hetookoffhi
st -
shi
rtt
hendroppedhisdi
ckonher.
Emalookedatitasherubbeditonherwetsl
i
t.
“
Youknowmyst
atus.
”
Shebr
eat
hedheav
il
y.“
Iam negat
ivet
oo.
”
“
Great
.”
Heki
ssedheragai
nand#r
emov
ed.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#94

Thef oll
owi ngmorningKennylookedather sel
fon
themi rr
ort henti
edherhairi
ntoapony tailbef
ore
putti
ngonhercap.Shedi dn’
tbothercov er
ingup
anything,thepoli
cehadt osee.Shegotherbagsand
draggedi toutgetti
nginsi
detheli
vingroom whereQ
waseat inghi sbr
eakfasti
nhisschooluni f
orm.
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Mama!
”
“
Hey
…whodr
opsy
ouof
fatschool
?”
“
Dad.
”
“
Ok,
Iwi
l
ldr
opy
ouof
ftoday
.”
Hel
ookedatherbag.“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“Ihavet
ogoandseemyhouse.It oldy
ouIwon’tbe
stayi
ngwit
hy ourdad.Iam goi
ngt
omyhouse.You
guyswil
lvi
sitmet her
e.”
Amberwal
kedf r
om Q’
sbedr
oom holdi
ngthe
washi
ngbasketwit
hhi
sclot
hes.Shedroppedi
t
st
ari
ngatKennyandhuggedher
.
“
Kenny
!”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Hey
…”
“
Iam sohappyt
oseey
ou.
”
“
Iam happyt
oseey
out
oo.Howi
sthebaby
?”
“
Shei
sfi
ne.
”
“
Congr
atul
ati
ons.
”
“
Yout
oo.
”
Kennysmi
l
edt
henl
ookedatQ.“
Youar
eal
ready
done?”
“
Yes.
”
“
AmberIwi
l
lseey
ou.Wazha,
wewi
l
ltal
k.”
“
Yesma.
”
“Cal
lmeKenny
.Byt
heway
,Wazha,
dir
ectmet
oQ’
s
school
.”
Wazhawal
kedov
erandqui
ckl
ydi
rect
edher
.
Kennywalkedoutwit
hQthentheygoti
nthecar
.
Kennyst
artedthecarasi
tmadeafunnysound,
she
si
ghedt
henr
ever
sedanddr
oveof
f.

*
**

AtQ’
sschool
,Kennyhuggedherboy
.
“
Bye!
”
“
Youwi
l
lpi
ckmeup?
”
“
Iam notsur
ebutmay
be.
.”
“
Iwantt
ocomewi
thy
ourhouse.
”
“
Ok.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Hesteppedoutandr ushedinsidetheschool gat
e.
Kennyreversedanddrovetot hepoli
cestati
on.
Minuteslat
ershewalkedinsidethepolicestati
on
thentookoffhercap.Thepoliceoffi
cerfrowned
l
ookingather .
“
Whatdi
dtheydot
oyou?
”
“
Iam her
etor
epor
tassaul
t.
”
*
**

Emal ookedatRonasl eepingonherbed, ashit

coveri
nghi swaistdown.Shef oundher sel
fsmi l
ing
assher ecall
edwhathehaddonet oher .Shewas
soreandhert highswerepai nf ulbutlordi thadbeen
worthit.Shebitherlowerlipr ecalli
ngj usthowhe
hadcur sedashepushedt hrough, howeacht hrust
hadbeenaccompani edwi t
hagr unt,hisheav y
breat
hingandt hatlastthr
ust .Hi sdickhad
di
scov eredcornersshenev erknewshehadand
goodLor d!Thismanknewwhathedi di nbed.I
twas
asifhet ai
lormadet ojustfuck
Shel ookedathisphoneasi tbeguntori
ngthen
quicklyhungupandswi tcheditoff
.Shepull
edback
thesheetandl ookedathi sdickasherpussygot
wet.Hewasgoi ngtoj ai
l,t
hattheybothknew.She
naught i
lycl
i
mbedov erhimi nherwhiteuni
for
m
rubbinghisdickandl ookedatitashegothard.
Ronasl
owl
ywokeupwhi
l
eshepul
l
edherpant
iest
o
thesi
desit
ti
ngonitandl
ethi
m si
nki
n.Shel
eaned
overandki
ssedhi
m.
“
Hey
…”
Shestart
edmovi
ngherwaistst
ari
ngathi
m.What
bett
erwaycoul
dther
ebethantogivehi
m ast
eamy
goodbye.
.
Awhi l
elat
erEmawi pedher
selfwi
that owel
then
changedherpant
ies.Shepul
leddownherwhi t
e
dressashestar
edather.Shesmiled.
“
Yourphonewasr
ingi
ng.Ihav
etogot
owor
k.”
Ronagotupt
henhel
dherwai
st.
“
Iwantt
odot
hatagai
n.”
Emal
aughed.“
Ngng,
bye.
”
“
Youshouldgiv
emeapr opergoodby
ebecauseI
mightnotcomeback.
”
Sheki
ssedhi
m.“
Ihopey oucomebackandifnot
…
youwi
llf
indmer
ighther
ewaiti
ngfory
ou.”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Theykissedonelastt
imethenshewalkedout
.Rona
tookhisphoneandswitchedi
ton.I
timmediat
ely
rang.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Morena,pleasecometothepol
i
cest
ati
oni
nthe
f
oll
owingthir
tyminut
es.
”
Ronat
ookadeepbr
eat
handsi
ghed.

*
**

RonalookedatKennyashewal kedov er,herf

ace
wasswol l
enwithclearhandprints.Heknewi twoul
d
behardtoconvinceherotherwise.Hecoul dn’
teven
readher,
shedidn’tseem angry
.Justtired.
“
Morena,
werecei
vedacomplai
ntagai
nsty
ou.Thi
s
womansaysy
oubeatherl
astni
ght.
”
Heswal
l
owed.“
Idi
dn’
tmeant
o.”
“
Soyoureal
l
ybeather
?Kant
emmegoneletsaakae
mokgwawagobit
sabanababat
ho?(
Wheredoyou
gett
hisbehav
iorofbeat
ingpeopl
e’
schi
l
dren?
)”
“Itwasami st ake.Onet hatIgravel
yregr
et.Thatis
nothowIwasr aised.Iam disappoint
edinmy self
thatIletmy selfbecomesomeonewhobeat s
women.Iam sor r
yKenny .Idon’tknowwhatgotov er
me, may beangerbuti twi l
lneverhappenagain.Iam
sorryyoulookt hewayy oulookbecauseofme.I t
wi l
lneverhappenagai n.”
Thepoli
ceoff
icernoddedt
henl
ookedatKenny
.
“Whatdoyousay?”
Shelookedatthelovebi
teonhisneckandsi
ghed
tear
full
y.Hehadsleptwi
thher,
shecouldseei
tin
hiseyes.Atearr
oll
eddownhercheekasherheart
sankthenshewipeditaway.
“Iam notgoi
ngt odropthecharges.Youcouldhave
kil
ledmelastnight,y
ouhadt heint
enti
ont o.I
t’
sokif
youwantt obewi t
hy ourgi
rl
fr
iendbuty ouaregoi
ng
todealwiththeconsequencesofbeatingme. ”
“EhMi
ster,
retsi
l
egogochar gaandy ouaregoingto
gobef
orethemagistrat
ewhowi l
ldeci
dehowl ong
youwi
llbeinj
ail
for.Thi
swil
lteachyouthatno
mat
terwhat
,younev
err
aisey
ourhandona
woman.
”
Ronanodded.“
Iunder
stand.
”

*
**

Kennyfinall
ywalkedoutputti
ngonhercapt hengot
i
nt hecar.Shereachedforherphoneandt extedthe
manwhowasgoi ngtoseetheplotwit
hherand
droveoff.Justt
hinki
ngaboutgardengotherexci ted.
Shewasaboutt obeherownbossandt hefeeli
ng
fel
tgreat.Shecouldalr
eadyimaginehowhergar den
wouldbel i
ke.
Herphoner
angasshedr
ove,
shel
ookedati
tthen
shepi
cked.
“
MmagweTumo.
.”
“
Kennymygi
rl
,wehav
erecei
vedacal
lfr
om t
he
Mot
samaif
amil
y.
”
“
About
?”
“
Abouty
ouandRona.
”
“
Whataboutus?
”
“
Theywantustosi
tdownallt
oget
herandf
indaway
f
orwar
dforthebot
hofyou.
”
“Aker
etheycamet
ocancel
what
everagr
eementwe
had?”
“
Theywantt
or ecti
fyt
hat
,gapeyoucan’
tbl
ame
t
hem,t
heydidn’tknowwher
ey ouwer
e.”
“Idon’
tt hi
nkRonaandIwi llevergetbacktogether
.
Hemov edon, t
heyshouldst opf or
cinghimtobe
withmewhenhecl earl
yloveshisnewgi rl
fri
end.
LennaIam notgoi ngt obotherany more.Iwantto
focusonmygar denandget ti
ngittostart
functi
oning.Iwantt odevelopitandmakei tthebest
thi
ngoutt here.Ial
readyhav eal otofi
deasforitand
Iam alreadygetti
ngexcited.InmyheadIcan
alr
eadyseei t…Kenny ’
sGar den.”
MmawgeTumolaughed.“
Iam al
soget
ti
ngexci
ted
f
ory
ou.Sowhatshoul
dRrgaweTumotellt
hem?”
“
Tobehonestt
her
eisnoneedf
ort
hemeet
ing.Rona
hasmov edonandyest
erdaypr
ovedthatt
ome.It
hadtotakehi
m beat
ingmeandt r
yingt
okil
lmesoI
under
standit
.”
“
Hewhat
?”
“Hesl
appedmethent
ri
edtosuff
ocat
emewitha
pil
l
ow.Formyownsaf
etyIwanttost
ayf
arf
rom t
his
man.”
“
Iunder
stand.Iwi
l
ltel
lhi
m.”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Okby
emygi
rl
.”
Kennyhunguppi
cki
nganot
heri
ncomi
ngcal
l
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
HiKenny
,it
’sMi
a.”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Heyl
ove,
howar
eyou?
”
“Iam f
ine.KemoGaboronekoUB.Ican’tf
ind
accommodat i
on,
Isl
eptonthebenchlastnight
.”
“
Whydi
dn’
tyoucal
l
?”
“
Idi
dn’
thav
eai
rt
ime.
”
“
Soy
ouar
est
il
latUB?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Iam comi
ng,Youwil
lstaywi
thme.Justdon’
ttel
l
y
ourmother
,shedespi
tesme.”
Miagi
ggled.“
Iwon’
t.Isenty
ouamessageon
f
acebook.”
“Youdid?I
tmusthav
egot
tenl
osti
nthemi
dstof
othermessages.
”
“Iunderst
and.Iwasjusttell
i
ngy outhaty ourfat
her
call
edmamabef oreyouwentt ojai
l.Hewasdy i
ng
andwant edtogiveyouyourshar eofinherit
ance.
Mamagav ethem yournameandwhensher eal
i
zed
onlyyoucangett hemoney ,shegavet hem awrong
numberandl i
edsay i
ngy ouwereov erseas.The
l
awy ersaidwheny oucomeback, y
oushoul d
contacthim.
”
“
Wow!
”
“
Yes.I
t’
sal
otofmoneyIt
hink.
”
“
Honestl
yIwantnothi
ngt
odowit
hthatmanorhis
money,
Iwil
ltakei
tandgi
vei
ttoKef
il
we,shei
sthe
onewhogotr
aped.
”
“
Ohok.Iwi
l
lwai
tatt
hesmal
lgat
e.”
“
Ok.Iam comi
ng.
”

*
**

Tshenol
olookedatKgosiasthepol
icebangedon
herdoor
.Shewasl i
ter
all
yshaki
ng,t
earsfi
ll
edher
eyes.
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
Kgosiki
ssedher
.“Youhav
enot
hingt
obesor
ryf
or
babe.
”
“
Iwi
shIwasn’
t-
“
“Runningawaywasj ustanideat
hatcouldhave
fai
led.Andcouldhavegottenyouar
restedtoo.The
copsar eev
erywhere.”
Sheputherhandsov
erherf
acecr
ying.“
Idon’
twant
yout
ogo.”
Hehuggedher .“
Iam sorry.Mylawyerwi
ll
cont
act
you.YesIwon’tbeher ebutyouandtheki
dswil
lbe
sort
edf i
nanci
all
y.Iloveyou,Il
oveyousomuch.Tel
l
thekidstoowhent heycomeback.”
Shenoddedast hepol
icebangedt
hedoorharder
.
Hewalkedtothedoorandopenedunlockedi
t,hi
s
handsup.Tshenolocr
iedl
ouderasshewatched
them t
akehim away.

*
**

Emawalkedinsi
dethehospi
tal
,thesmil
eonher
facewi
de.Hercoll
eaguel
ookedather.
“
Tsenawenagi
rl
!”
Emal
aughed.“
Hey
..
”
“
Youar
egl
owi
ng.
”
“
It
’sj
usthappi
ness.Not
hingmor
e.”
“
Ihav
en’
tseeny
oul
i
ket
hisbef
ore.
”
Emacont
inuedwal
ki
ngl
aughi
ng.Al
lshecoul
dthi
nk
aboutwasRona.I twascl earshewasi nlov ewith
him.Shet ookadeepbr eathi nthenl aughedal one.
Goshi twassocr azyhowshewasal readyseeing
herselfashiswi fe.Shet houghtofhi sbabymama
andsi ghedwi threlief
.Shesecr et
lywonder edhow
hewoul dfeel aboutababy ..shebi therlowerl i
p
recal
lingherwombcancerl iethatshesai dtoget
him off,t
hel i
ewhi chclear l
yhadn’ twor ked.She
rubbedherf latstomacht hought f
ullythensmi led
alonebutt henagai n,
hergoal wasn’taboutbei nga
babymamat houghshewaswel l
awar ethatshewas
growingold.St il
l
, shewant edt obemor ethanbaby
mama.Shemadeament alnotetogett he
emer gencypi l
lafterwor kmaki nguphermi nd.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#95

Kennywalkedbacktohercarattheplotwi
thasmil
e.
MiajumpedinatthebackinherjeansasKennygot
i
nwi t
hthelandscapear
chit
ect.
“
So…soy
ousawt
hatr
ight
?”
Thelandscapear
chit
ectnodded.“Yes,
Ialsol
ooked
i
ntotheplansyousentmey est
erdayanditwi
llwor
k.
Thi
sspacei sbi
gandcanabl et
odot hat.
”
“
Ok,butyousawt
hoset
rees,
thegum t
rees?Iwant
t
okeepthem.”
“Yes,Iwasthinkingthesamet oo.SoIwill
goand
drawupapl anf oryouputt
ingev ery
thi
ngyousai
d
youwant edthenwewi l
ldi
scussi tt
oget
herwi
thmy
gardendesigner.”
“
Thanky
ousomuch.Thatwi
l
lbehel
pful
.”
“
Yes.Hav
eagoodday
.”
Hest
eppedoutandgoti
nhi
scarasMi
ajumpedat
t
hef
ront
.
“
Wow!Iam happyt
ohav
eyouasmysi
ster
.”
Kennyl
aughedst
art
ingt
hecar
.
“
What
’st
hatsound?
”
“Idon’tknowhonest
ly.Let
’sgot
omyhouse.Howi
s
Kefi?
”
“
Adr
unkar
d.”
Kennydrov
eawaywithasigh.“IwishIcanhel
pher,
gethert
other
apybutshejustplai
nhatesme.She
doesn’
twantt
oseemyf ace.”
“Youshouldn’tletherhatr
edgettoyou.Igeti
t,
maybeshedoeshav eeveryr
ightt
obeangr ybutit’
s
beeny ear
s.Year sofnothi
ngbutmisery.Ir
eall
ycan’t
dealwithher,youdon’tgoaroundblamingeveryone
foryourmisfortunes.
”
Kennyl
ookedatMi
athensmi
l
ed.“
So,
whatar
eyou
goi
ngtostudy
?”
“
HumanResour
ceManagement
.”
“
Ok,
that
’sni
ce.
”
“
Whatdi
dyoust
udy
?”
“Marketi
ngManagement .Atfir
stIthoughtIwould
goforInteri
ordesignbutchangedmymi ndthough
everyti
mesomeonewhoIdi dn’ttal
ktotri
edtotalk
tomebecauset heywereshockedt hatIpassed
asked,Itoldthem Iam st
udyinginter
iordesi
gn.
Confuset heenemy .
”
Mi
alaughed.“
Ishoul
dtr
ythatt
oo.
”
“Youshould.Letthem keepguessi
ngwhaty
ouar
e
doingwit
hy ourli
fe.”
Kennyr
eachedf
orherr
ingi
ngphone.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,it
’sMaat
la.
”
“
Hi.
”
“
Ihear
dyouar
eback,
Iam r
eal
l
yhappy
.”
“
Iam notdr
oppi
ngt
hechar
ges.
”
Maat l
achuckl
ed.“Whydoy outhi
nkthat
’swhyI
cal
led?Iam notcal
li
ngforthat
,Ronashouldgoto
j
ail
f oramonthortwo,gethimtostartt
hinki
ng
pr
oper
ly.
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Iappr
eci
atet
hesuppor
t.
”
“Youaret
hemotherofhiski
ds,t
helastt
hinghe
shoul
dbedoingi
sraisi
nghandsony oubutmay be
hetakesi
tfr
om me.Iam theworstbi
gbrotherever
.”
“Ronaisagrownman.Hecanmakehi
sown
decisi
ons.
”
“Yeahbutthat’
snotwhyIcal
l
ed.Yout
woshoul
djust
stopwit
hy ourgames.Whymoveonwhenyouknow
youbothloveeachother
?”
“Yourbr
otherdoesn’
tlovemeany mor
e.Hedidn’
t
evengivemeachancet oexplai
nwhereIwas.He
almostkil
l
edmef orhisgir
lf
ri
end.”
“
Hedoesn’
tlov
ethatwoman.I
t’
sal
laphase.
”
“Idoubti t
.Hesleptwithherevenaft
erwhat
happenedy est
erday.TobehonestIlov
eyour
brother,Ilovehi
m somuchbutIhav edecidedto
stopt r
ying.Lethim bewit
hhisgir
lf
ri
end.Event
uall
yI
willacceptitandmov eon.”
“
Don’
tsayt
hat
.Hei
sgoi
ngt
oregr
ett
his.
”
“
Gor
il
lawi
l
lbet
her
etocomf
orthi
m.”
Maat
lachuckl
ed.“
Who?
”
“
Gor
il
la-
“
“
Kenny
!”
Kennysnappedherattenti
onbacktotheroadasshe
drovei
ntoacarinfrontofhers.Shequi
ckl
ystepped
onthebreaks.Shedroppedthephonebumpinginto
thecar
.
“
Fuck!
”
Mi
alookedatt
heAudi
’
sdr
iverst
epout
.
“
Hedoesn’
tlookhappy
.”
“
Stayi
nsi
de.
”
Kennyst
eppedoutast
hedr
iverwal
kedov
er.
“
Wher
ewer
eyoul
ooki
ngat
?”
Kennyl
ookedathi
mthenatt
het
inydent
.“Iam
real
l
ysorr
y.”
“
Howdoyouruni
ntomewhenwear eataredtr
aff
ic
l
i
ght
?Wheredidy
ougety
ourl
icense?Kengolebari
y
aana?
”
“Iam r
eal
l
ysor
ry.Pl
easef
orgi
veme.I
t’
sjustasmal
l
dent.
”
Hel
ookedathert
henchuckl
ed.
“
What
’sy
ourname?
”
“
Kenny.Icanhavet
hisf
ixed.Iwaswr
ongandIt
ake
r
esponsi
bil
it
yfori
t.
”
Thepoli
cecarwhi
chwasdri
vi
ngpastt
hem stopped
thentwopol
iceof
fi
cer
sst
eppedout
.Kennylooked
attheman.
“Iam sor
ry.Canwesolvei
tonourown?Wedon’
t
havetoinvol
vethoset
wo.”
“
Ok,
giv
emey
ournumber
.”
Kennyquickl
ygavehim hernumbert henhepaged
herasthepoli
ceoff
icer
sappr oached.
“
Bagol
o,whathappenedher
e?”
Themant ur
nedtothepoli
ceoffi
cer
s.“
Gasesepe
hel
a,r
eisolv
il
e.(I
t’
snothi
ng,wehavesolv
edit.
)”He
tur
nedtoKenny.“Kennywee,r
etabuaakere?(
We
wi
l
ltal
kri
ght
?)”
“
Yes.
”
“
Shar
p!Badi
rel
apuso,
gosi
ame.
”
Hegoti
nhi
scaranddr
oveof
fast
hepol
i
cel
aughed.
“
Kanteleir
ang?Kanalei
rat
raf
fi
clejol
amotsi
leng.
(
Whatarey oudoi
ng?Youar
ecausingt
raf
fi
cdati
ng
i
ntheroad.)
”
Kennychuckl
edt
henj
umpedbacki
nhercar
.“Sor
ry.
”
Shedr
oveof
fasherphoner
ang.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
KeTat
so,
sohowar
eyougoi
ngt
ofi
xmycar
?”
“Aowwtherr
awenaebeor engyaanong?(
Whatare
yousayi
ng?)Kanathat
’sj
ustasmalldent
.Ican’
t
evenseeitf
rom af
ar.
”
Tatsol
aughed.“
OtaswabaKenny,bankanyakol
oi
yameorelsekeyapol
i
ce.(Youwil
lbesorr
yKenny,
fi
xmycarorelseIam goi
ngtothepol
ice.
)”
“
Nkagoi
tat
ola.(
Iwi
l
ldenyy
ou.
)”
Hel
aughedevenmore.“Heel
amonyanakewenawa
mar
amaar or
ogil
e,warengnaar
e?”
“
Leav
emycheeksoutofi
t.
”
“Justasi
denote,
ifher
aiseshi
shandsonyou,
he
doesn’
tdeser
veyou.Heisadouchebag.
”
“
Hei
sinj
ail
.”
“
Good.Sowar
engkakol
oiy
ame?
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Howmuchi
sitt
ofi
xthatsmal
l
dent
?”
“
P500.Ewal
l
eti
tker
ekel
unchho!
”
“Oratadi
l
obutthanky
oufornotsay
ingany
thi
ngto
thecopsandIam r
eal
l
ysorr
y.Iwasonthephonet
o
behonest.
”
“
It
sok,
wenaewal
l
etaP500.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Shar
paker
e?”
“
Eer
ra.
”
Kennyhungt
henMi
aLookedather
.
“
What
?”
“
Somemenar
ejustmadef
orsi
nshel
a.”
Kennybur
stoutlaughi
ng.“Mi
awee,
whatsi
nsdo
youknow?Areyoudating?
”
Sheshookherheadl
aughi
ng.
“
Lies!Waj
ola.(
youar
edat
ing.
)Whoi
she?
”
“
Mynei
ghbor
.”
“
Isn’
thel
i
ke…ol
d?”
“
Hei
sbutIl
i
kehi
m.”
“Idon’tknowheybuty oushoul dknowmenwhoar e
wayol derthanyouwantdi f
ferentthingsinli
fe.I
wouldsuggestt hatatthi
sage, enj
oyy ourli
fe.Enj
oy
yourself
.Don’tli
mityoursel
ftoar elati
onshi
pt hen
fi
ndoutt hatyouarealmostt hi
rtyandhav en’t
enjoyedy ourl
if
eonebi t.
”

*
**
Tshenolol
aidonthebedcryi
ng,
hermot heri
n-l
aw
walkedinandfr
ownedatthedarknessoftheroom.
Shequickl
yopenedthewindowsandcurtai
ns.
“
Nol
o,t
sogamygi
rl
.Wakeup.
”
Shepull
edt
hebl
anket
sfr
om Nol
o’sheadandl
ooked
ather
.
“Don’
tdothist
oyoursel
f.IlongtoldKgosithati
fhe
doesn’
tchangehi
sway shewi l
leitherendupdead
orinj
ail
.It
houghthi
m hav i
ngchildrenwil
lhelpbuti
t
seemednot.Ther
eisnothingwecandoabouti t
now.”
Shesatbesi deherthenpul
ledheri nherarms.“Iam
sorr
ybutKgosi madehischoicesandhei sgoingto
facet heconsequencesofhisactions.Hecal
ledme
yesterdaysoIcancome.That ’stheonlygoodthing
hedi d.”

*
**

Namet
sot
ookadeepbr
eat
hwal
ki
ngi
nsi
det
he
i
ntervi
ewr oom.Shelookedattheroom ful
lwi
th
otherpeople,
all
for
mal l
ydressed.Shesatdownnext
toalady.
“
Hi.
”
Theladyl
ookedathert
henl
aughed.“
Ist
hatmy
dress?
”
Nametsolookedathersel
fthenatt
hel
adyreal
i
zing
i
ndeed,t
heywer eput
ti
ngont hesamedr
ess.
“
Youcopi
edme.
”
Shel
aughed.“
Hi,
I’
m Yaone.
”
Namet
sosmi
l
ed.“
Namet
so.
”
“
Eish,
Iam soner
vous.
”
“
Met
oo.Ihopei
t’
snotanor
ali
nter
view.Nkal
ela.
”
“Heish,
nnawena.Al
lthepeopl
eher
elookol
d,t
hey
havesomuchexperi
ence,i
t’
ssuchthi
ngst
hat
alwaysdemot
ivat
eme. ”
“
Thatmakesbot
hofus.
”
Theint
ervi
eweecamemi nut
eslat
erandgavethem
al
lquesti
oner
stofi
ll
.YaoneandNametsolookedat
eachotherthensmil
edf
il
li
ngupt
heirquest
ioner
s.A
whil
elatert
heybothwal
kedoutl
aughi
ng.
“
IfIdon’
tgeti
t,atl
eastIhav
emadeaf
ri
end.
”
Yaonel
aughed.“
Met
oo,
sohowl
onghav
eyoubeen
unempl
oyed?”
“Ev ersincev ar
sit
y.Inev
erwor kedasi ngledayofmy
l
ife.It’
sr eal
lytoughouthere.Ioncewentf ort
his
i
nt ervi
ew, mat t
eroffact
,theyweregoi ngt ohi
reme
butt hisgirl
whom Ihadasmal ldisagreementwith
fi
rstsemest erattheuni
versi
tywasgoi ngtobemy
boss, shedi dn’
thiremebecauseoft hat.
”
“
What
?”
“
Yeah.I
t’
sreal
l
ytough.
”
“
Nyaahowcoul
dshenothir
ey ouf
oraper
sonal
mat
ter
?Somepeopl
ethough!”
Theycont
inuedchat
ti
ngwalki
ngt
ot hebusst
op
whereNametsowouldgetacombihomewhil
e
Yaonegotherst
owor k.

*
**
Maatl
awaitedbyt herecept
ionthenminut
eslat
era
nur
sewalkedov er.Heimmediatel
yknewitwasher,
shewaseverythi
ngRonahadsai dthatnowhefound
hi
mselfconfused.Didhereall
yli
kethewoman?He
smil
ed.
“
Hi,
youaskedf
orme?
”
“Yes.Mynamei
sMaat
la,
Rona’
sbr
other
.Youmust
beEma.”
Emasmi
l
ed.“
Hi,
howcanIhel
pyou?
”
“Look, Iam goingt obehonestwi t
hy ou,Ronal oves
Kenny .Hehasl ovedherforyearsnow.Suchl ove
doesn’ tj
ustf ade.Heisgoingt obeinar elationship
withy out r
yingtoconv i
ncehimselfthathei smov ing
onwhenhei sl y
ingtohimself.Hewi l
lhurty ou
becausehei sgoi ngtogobackt oKenny ,onewayor
theother .Youar eabeaut i
fulsmartwoman, Iam
surey ougetwhatIam say ing.Thesetwol oveeach
other.Theyhav ekids,t
heyareaf amily,pl
easedon’ t
beabar ri
erbet weenthem becausey ouar eonl yone
whoi sgoi ngt ogethurt.Ronawillneverlov eany
womanl i
kehel
ovesKenny.Hehasbeeni
na
r
elat
ionshi
pwit
hherforyear
snow.”
“Iunderst
andthatyouarel
ooki
ngoutfory
our
brother
.”Shesmiled.“
Youl
ikeKennyf
orhim don’
t
you?”
“
Yesbecausehel
ovesher
.”
“Maatla,Iam nother et ocomebet weenany one.I
l
ov eyourbr otherandIknowaboutKennyenought o
makemyowndeci sionsbutIheary ou.Iam goi ngto
waitti
llhei sfreedthenIwi l
lhav easer ioust al
kwi th
him.Iam nott hetypetomakedeci sionsl i
ket his,I
willt
alktoRonaandwewi l
lbot hdecidet heway
forward.Ifhei sgoingbackt oKenny ,
fine.Ifhei s
stayi
ngwi thme, t
hent hat’sstil
lfine.ButIam j ust
surpri
sedy ouwoul dwanthi mt obewi thawoman
whodoesn’ tvaluehim.Sheknowst hepowershe
hasov erhim andsheabusesi t
,sheev enabusest he
l
ov eherkidshasf orher.Ist hatthekindofwoman
Ronashoul dspendt her estofhi sli
fewi th?Shei s
i
mmat ureandhasashar ptongue, shei stoxic.He
hasbeent hroughal ot,don’tyout hinkhej ustwanta
breakfrom bei nghurt?Kennyi stakinghi m st r
aight
tothedepressi
onholebecauseshekeepshurt
ing
him butnooneseesthat.Youaregoi
ngtoloseyour
brotheri
fyoukeepforci
nghim onthi
svi
lewoman.”
Shet
urnedandwal
kedaway
.

Day
sLat
er…
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#96

Day
sLat
er.
..

Miasatonthebedhol di
ngLaronawatchi
ngas
Kennydidhermake-upsitti
ngonthebed.Kenny
caref
ull
yranherli
psti
ckonherlipst
hengotupand
putonherheels.Miasmiled.
“
Ican’
twai
tti
l
lIknowhowt
odomymake-
upl
i
ke
t
hat.
”
Kennyl
aughed.“By
e!Bytheway
,whenIcomeback,
Iwantt
oseey ourt
imet
able.
”
“
Ok.Mamacal
l
ed,
areshewant
smoney
.”
“
Don’tgi
veheryourall
owance.Iwi
l
lspeakt
othat
l
awyertodayandlethergett
hemoney.
”
“Whygiveherallt
hemoneywheny oual
sosuf
fer
ed?
Yes,shegotrapedbuty
ousuffer
edabuseand
rej
ecti
onfr
om her.Youdeser
vetobecompensat
ed
f
ort
hat.Imaginei
fit
’s100k,
youget50andsheget
s
t
heother50,maybegetanewcarwitht
hatmoney.
”
“
What
’swr
ongwi
thmycar
?”
“
It
’ssi
ckandol
d.”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Youhav
est
art
edMi
a.”
“
Youneedanewcar
.”
Kennysmiledthenpickedherhandbagandki
ssed
Lar
ona’scheeksbeforewalki
ngout.
“
Wazha,
Iam goi
ng.
”
“
Ok,
Ihav
esentt
hel
i
st.
”
“
Ok.Iwi
l
lgetev
ery
thi
ngonmywaybackhome.
”
Kennywalkedoutputt
ingonhersunglassesthen
gotinhercarandst
artedtheengi
neignoringthe
soundthecarkeptmaking.

*
**

Maat
lal
ookedatNamet
soassheputonherf
ormal
dressandthr
eeinchheels.Shet
ookastepstar
ing
athersel
fonthemirr
orthensmil
edtur
ningto
Maatla.
“
HowdoIl
ook?
”
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
eveIgotaj
ob.
”
Maatl
astoodupandputhi
shandsonherwai
st.“
I
am pr
oudofyoubabe.
”
Shetookadeepbr
eat
hthensi
ghed.“
Ok,l
etmego.
Bytheway,
whatti
meareyougoi
ngtocourt
?”
“
Rightnow.
”
“
IsAt
sil
egoi
ngt
opost
ponet
heweddi
ng?
”
“
Ifhegetsl
ockedupy
es.Hopef
ull
yhedoesn’
tget6
months.
”
“MmennaIdon’ tblamehim, notthatIsupport
vi
olencebutKennyhasapoi sonousmout h.She
can’tcont
rolwhatcomesoutofi tandt hi
stime
aroundtherei
snopr egnancyexcuset ouse.”
“
Kennycoul
dhav
esai
dany
thi
ngt
ohi
m,shei
s
j
ust
if
iabl
e,shecaughthi
m wi
thanot
herwoman.
”
“Af
tershejustl
eft.Whatdi dshethinkwasgoingt
o
happen?Thathewoul dj ustwai
tforheronl
y?
Honestl
yRonadeser vesbet t
erthansomeonewho
hol
dsgrudgesf oryears.Kennythinksshei
stheonly
oneoutthere.
”
“I
sthi
sbecauseshedi
dn’
tgiveyout
hej
obaf
tery
ou
hadtr
iedget
ti
ngherboyf
ri
end?”
Namet
sol
ookedathi
m.“
Wow!Ok.
”
Shesteppedbackthentookherhandbag.
Regr
ettabl
y,Maatl
apull
edherhand.
“
Sorr
y,Ij
ustdon’
tunder
standwhyyouhat
eKenny
whensheneverdi
danyt
hingtoyou.
”
“Idon’thateKenny ,
Iam justsay i
ngKennyhasa
poisonousmout hshecan’tcontrolwhenangry.She
call
edmymot herandsisterprosti
tut
es.Those
wor dsplayedinmyheadf orthelongestti
me,at
somepoi ntIwouldcrybecauseasmuchasIt riedt
o
notl eti
tgettome, itwouldgett ome.”
“
Ok.
”
Namet
sosi
ghed.“
Letmego.
”
“
Ok.
”
Heki
ssedher
.“Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Shewal
kedoutandminut
esl
aterMaat
laal
sogoti
n
hi
scaranddr
oveoff
.

*
**

Tshenol
osmil
edasKgosisatopposi
teher
.He
smil
edtoost
ari
ngathersmil
e.
“
Hey
…”
“
Imi
ssy
ou.Ar
eyouok?Ihear
dinj
ail
they
-“
“
Iam good.
”
“Icont
actedyourl
awyer
.Hesayswehaveagood
case.Theycan’
tpi
nthemurder
stoyou.
”
Helookedinherey
esandsmi
l
ednotwi
l
li
ngt
obr
eak
herhear
t.
“
Itol
dyou,
youhav
enot
hingt
obewor
ri
edabout
.”
Tshenolosmiledexci
tedly
.“Ihavebeenstudyi
ng
casessimil
artoyours,t
hepol i
ceareprobabl
yjust
tr
yingtopinthei
runsolvedcasesony ou.
”
Hesmil
edt
henki
ssedherhands.“
Howar
ethe
ki
ds?
”
“
Theyar
efi
ne.Theymi
ssy
ou.Imi
ssy
ou.
”
“
Imi
ssy
out
oo.I
smymot
herst
il
lther
e?”
“
Shel
efty
est
erday
.”
“Wheny
ougetmoney
,dot
hatt
hingy
ouwant
edt
o
do.
”
Tshenol
osmi led.“
Ok.Bytheway ,
theki dswere
al
readyaskingaboutournexttr
ip,Ithinkweshoul
d
j
ustholdoffti
llyouar
efree.I
twon’ tfeelt
hesame
wit
houtyou.”
“
Nah,t
aket
hem.YouknowAndr eahasbeenwant i
ng
t
ogotoKauai,ev
ersincemydaughterl
earntthat
t
her
eisaplacecall
edKauai
,shejustwant
st ogo
t
her
e.”
“
Wit
houty
ou?
”
“
Babe,
myt
ri
alwi
l
ltaket
ime.
”
“
Idon’
twantt
ogowi
thouty
ou.
”
“Thekidsdon’thavet osufferbecauseofme.Take
them.Youwi l
ljustpretendIam there.Youhavet o
star
tliv
ingyourli
fe,Imi ghtnotcomeout .Iam bei
ng
realr
ightnow.Look, Ihavet ogo.Takethekidsto
Kauai.Il
oveyou.”
Hest
oodupandwal
kedaway
.

*
**

Atthecourt,KennysighedasRonagotsent encedto
thr
eemont hsinprison.Sheswallowedast heyt ook
him away,hermemor ytakingherbacktothet ime
shewast heonebei ngtakenaway .Thecour t
’s
doorsopenedt heneveryonewalkedout.Maat la
walkedovertoher.
“Hey
…i fy
ouneedanyassi
stantwi
tht
heki
ds,
don’
t
hesi
tat
etocal
lme.”
“
Thanks.
”
At
sil
enodded.“
Met
oo.
”
“
Thanky
ousomuch.
”
Maatl
asmil
ed.“
Hopeful
l
ywhenhewal ksout,
he
woul
dhavehadenoughti
met othi
nkabouthi
sli
fe
andst
opacti
ngli
keaconfusedsomebody.
”
Kennyshruggedt
henwal
kedawayasMaat
lapi
cked
hi
sringi
ngphone.
“
Mama?
”
“
Howdi
ditgo?
”
“
Hei
sgoi
ngt
obei
njai
lfort
hreemont
hs.
”
“Iam v
erydi
sappoi
nted.Idi
sappoint
edinyour
brot
her.Nowheisgoingtobelockedupallbecause
ofawomanwhodoesn’ tcareabouthim.
”
“Kennyl
oveshim.Shewassi ckt hat’
swhyshewent
away.Shewasdepr essed,shewasatSbr anat his
wholeti
me.Allshehasev erdonewasl oveRona,
sheisnotabadperson.BecauseofRona’ sact ions,
shewenttojai
l.Howdoy outhinkshef eltwal king
outofpri
sonafterl
osingfiveyear sofherl i
fe?You
hati
ngKennyisnothelpingany thing.Sheist he
mot
herofy
ourgr
andchi
l
drenandwi
l
lal
way
sbe.
”
Hegoti
nhi
scar
.
“Shewasdepr
essedt
hatshedeci
dedt
oabandon
herki
ds?”
“Yes,Shehadt hedepressionthatoccur
st o
pregnantwomant henaftert
hatshehadt he
depressi
ont hatoccurstomot her
swhohav ej
ust
givenbir
th.Canwest opjudgingthiswoman? ”
“
Iwil
l neverl
i
keherandIam happyt
hatt
he
r
elat
ionshipi
sover
.”
Maat
lasi
ghedandhungup.

*
**

Meanwhi l
eKennywr appedupt heconv er
sationwi
th
herlandscapearchit
ectandopenedhercardoorj ust
asEmapar kedhercarbesidehers.Shesteppedout
ofthecarandsi ghedstar
ingatMaat l
awhowas
dri
vingaway .Shegotbackinhercart henstepped
outthoughtful
lyandwalkedovertoKenny .
“Youhavebeengonef ormont hs,
Ronahasbeen
taki
ngcareofthosebabiesaloneallthiswhi l
e, he
nevercomplai
nedandhewasdoi ngagr eatjob.You
comeonedayt henyout akeawayt heirfatherjust
l
ikethat.Don’
tyoufeelanythi
ngf orthosei nnocent
souls?
”
“
What
?”
“Youheardme.Ar eyousobi t
tert
hatnowy ouwould
rat
herhavehimi npri
sonbecausehedoesn’ twant
youanymor e?Iam j
usttryi
ngtounderstand.You
knowhiskidslovehim somuch.Youar east r
anger
tothem.Youar enotbeingfai
ronthekids.Atleast
thi
nkforthem.”
“
Ronaal
mostki
l
ledme!
”
“
Youar
easadhumanbei
ng.If
eel
sor
ryf
ory
ou.
”
“Si
ncewhenareyouarether
apist
?Iam notsad.I
am perf
ect
lyf
ineandwill
notkeepqui
etwhen
abused.Ki
ngKong,getawayfr
om mycar,youare
annoyi
ngme..
”
“
Thereyougo,
Iwaswonder
ingwhenyouar
egoing
t
ostart
.Youar
esoweak,t
hat’
syouronl
yweapon.
Goonandcal
lmeal
lthenamesi
nthewor
ld.You
ar
esochi
ldi
sh.
”
Kennyl ookedather .“Theonl yper sonchi l
dishisy ou.
Yout hinkhel ov esy ou?Thatheact uall
ywant sa
rel
ati
onshi pwi t
hy ou?Youar enot hi ngbuthi ssex
toy.Hewant edt of ucksomet hing, any t
hingandhe
foundy ou.I tcoul dhav ebeenadog.Hedoesn’ tlove
youandnev erwi llbe.Hecoul dhav ef uckeda
prosti
tut ebecausehewast hi
rsty .Butgoahead, stay
withhi m andl et’
sseewher eitwi ll gety ou.Youdon’ t
knowwher eRonaandIcomef rom.Wecomef rom
farWakhanda, sof arthatIf eelst upi dforev en
getti
ngi ntoi twi thy ouy esterday .Youar enotwor t
h
i
t.Hewentt oj ail,hei sgoingt ocomeoutandguess
what, hei sgoi ngt of uckmesohar daf terthat,we
aregoi ngt obehappy .Whatwehav eismor ethan
j
ustmer el ove, it
’st ears,i
t’
spai n, it’
s…”Kenny
pausedandsmi led.“It’
shappi ness.Bi tt
er sweet
somet imesbutt hat ’sus.Not hingcancompar et o
whatweshar e.Youar enot hingcompar edt owhat
weshar e.Youcannev ercomecl oset ot hatbecause
youknowwhat ?Wewer emadef oreachot her.ButI
seey ouwantt ocr y.Iam goingt oleaveyou,Iwill
notev enf i
ghty ouandhewi l
lcomebackonhi sown.
Hav eagoodday .”Kennygoti nhercart hensmi led.
“Andoh, sweet ydoy ourselfafavorandgeta
mor ni
ngaf t
erpi l
l
.Ifhedi dn’tuseacondom andy ou
thi
nky ouar egoi ngt ousebabyi nyourfavor,
youar e
i
nf orasur prise.Butt hanky ouforhelpinghimr eli
ef
hisstress.Poort hingmusthav ebeenv er
ystressed.
Ifyourpussyi sstil
lthrobbi
ng, soakitincoldwat er,
youwi llbefine.”

THREEMONTHSLATER.
..
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#97

Emagoti
nhercarlooki
ngatthet
imet
hendr
oveof
f
tal
ki
ngt
ohersi
steronthephone.
“Ireall
ydon’tknow,Ijustwantt
ohearf r
om him.I
can’tIam fi
ndingmy selfi
nyetanot
hersituati
on
wher ebyIstandachancet ogethur
t.Ishouldn’
t
hav eenter
tainedhi
m becausenowIam i nlovewith
amanwhoIam notev ensurei
fhelovesme.He
fuckedmet hewholenight,i
nmyheadIt houghtit
was…”
“
Iam sorr
yEma, wit
hthebabymamai nthepi
ctur
e
i
t’
sreal
lydif
ficul
tbecauseitmeanshewant sherbut
t
henhisacti
onssayot herwise.TobehonestnnaI
r
eall
ydon’tl
ikethisguy.Idon’tt
rusthi
m.”
Tearsfi
ll
edEma’ sey
esasshestoppedatthered
traf
fi
cli
ght.“Myhearti
sal
readybr
eaki
ng.KooreEmi
am Ithi
sunluckynemma?Whydoesn’tGodev er
favorme?Justonce.MaybeIam meanttodieal
one.
ForGod’ssakeIam 32,myagemateshave-”
“Don’
tdot hat
.Don’tdothattoyour
sel
fok?Youare
notyouragemat esandy ouwil
lmoveatyourown
pace.Thisisnotacompet i
ti
on,whent
hetimeis
ri
ght,ev
erythi
ngwillf
all
inplace”
Thetraff
icl
ightchangedtogreent henshedroveoff
.
“Idon’
tknow.IfRonaisnotserioust henIam j
ust
goingtobackoff.Iam t
ir
edofbei ngused.”
“
Iam sor
rymylove.KnowIwi
l
lal
way
sbet
her
efor
y
ou.Nomatterwhat.
”
“
Thanks.
”
Emahungupdr
ivi
ngt
opr
isonsot
opi
ckhi
m up.

*
**

Emawai tedinhercarscr ol
l
ingthoughherf acebook
l
etti
nghermi ndof falotofthi
ngs.Sheraisedher
headasacarpar kedbesidehersthenshel ookedat
hi
sbr ot
hers.Atthatmomentsheact ual
lywi shedher
windowswer eti
nt ed,
theydidn’
tli
keherandt hey
neverputeffor
tintohidingi
t.
Shest artedhercar,obv i
ousl yhehadchangedhis
mind.Shepausedst ar
ingathi m ashewalkedover
i
nt hewhi t
et-
shirthehadbeenar rest
edinandhis
j
eans, thewat chonhi swr istmadehim evenmore
sexy.Ni ggawasal lbuffed.Hespokebr i
eflyt
ohis
brotherswhot ur
nedandl ookedathercar.Rona
walkedov ert
henopenedt hepassengerdoorand
j
umpedi n.
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Hey
..
”
Emal ookedathi
mf ai
l
ingtokeepaser
iousf
ace
thensmiledbl
ushi
ng.“Hey
…”
“
Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ngt
opi
ckmeup.
”
“
Iwasbegi
nni
ngt
othi
nkt
hatmay
bey
ouchanged
y
ourmind.
”
“
Nah.Let
’sgo.
”
Sher ev
ersedanddr oveoff.Shelookedathi m and
foundhersel
fsmili
ngwhi l
eheswi tchedonhi s
phone.Shestoleglancesathimtheni ncreasedthe
volumeonYar onaFM whileasongpl ayed.She
i
mmedi atel
ysmi l
edatheral lt
imefavorit
esong.
“
Wher
eam It
aki
ngy
ou?
”
“
Myhouse.
”
“
Ok.
”
Helookeddownonhisphonewi thafrownscr
oll
i
ng
downKenny’st
imel
i
ne.Herlatestpi
cturewasher
handontopofamalehandwi thacapt i
onof‘
he
sayshi
shandismorebeauti
fulthanmi ne,
guy
sbe
thej
udges’
.
Hezoomedint
hepi
ctur
elooki
ngatt
hehandt
hen
swal
lowed.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
Herai
sedhisheadwi
thasmi
l
e.“
Yeah…j
ustsome
messages.
”
“
Ohok.
”

*
**

I
nherhouseallal
one,
Nol
ofor
ceddownfooddown
hert
hroat
.Unablet
oswal
l
owanymore,
shereached
f
orherj
uiceandt
ookasi
pasherphoner
ang.
“
Hel
l
o?”
KennysighedasTshenol
oanswer
edi
nal
owv
oice.
“Haveyoueaten?
”
“
Iam t
ryi
ng.
”
“Noloyouneedt oeat.IgetthatKgosi
’tr
iali
s
stressi
ngyouupbutf ri
endy ouhavekidstothi
nkfor
.
Honestlyyoucan’ tgoonl i
kethiswhenyouhav e
kids.Whataret heysupposedt odowhent heysee
theirmotherbreakingdown?Youar et
heirpi
ll
arof
strengt
hnow. ”
“
Youdon’
tunder
stand.
”
“Iunderstand.Iunderstandt rustme, Iwasoncei n
Kgosi’spositi
onsoIunder stand.Att hisstage,y
ou
starv
ingy oursel
fisnotgoi ngt ohelpany onebut
slowlysnatchy ourl
if
eaway .Whatdi dthedoctorsay?
Ifyoucont i
nuedoingt his,yourcondit i
onisgoingto
getwor se.Don’tdothist oyour sel
f.Thisisnotthe
NoloIknow.TheNol oIknowwoul dnev erdowhat
youar edoing.Remembert het imeThabo’ swif
e
bewitchedy ou?Idon’thav epr ooftot hatbutIknow
shedidbutrememberhowyoufoughtt
ogetbet
ter
thosedays.Dot
hatnow.Doitf
oryourki
ds.
”
Nolosni
ffedcr
ying.“
Mamat ookt
hekids.Ihav
eno
onebutthewall
s.Ican’
tev
enwork.”
“Thengotoyourmom.Gotoy
ourki
ds.Bear
ound
someone.Youneedt
oli
ve.
”
“
Iam scar
ed.
”
‘
Youhav eev er
yr i
ghttobe.Iam al soscaredbut
i
magi nehowy ourki dsarefeel
ing.Beingsof araway
from t
heirmothersi mplybecauseshecan’ tstop
cryi
ngandshei sst arvi
ngherself.Thei
rfatherbei
ng
takenawayandpr obablyfaci
nglifeimpri
sonment .
Thinkforyourkidstoo.”
“
Ng…”
“Makesomethi
ngtoeatandgot oShakawe.Be
aroundf
amil
y,bear
oundy ourki
ds.Takeitdayby
day.”
“
Ok.
”
“By
ebabe.Iwi
l
lcal
lyoul
atert
ochecki
fyouhav
e
eat
en.
”
“
Ok.
”
KennyhungupthenTshenol
opi
ckedt
hespookand
for
cedthefooddownherthr
oat
.

*
**

Miawal kedoutofUBgatesthengoti
nacar.Her
boyfr
iendleanedoverandki
ssedherbef
oredri
vi
ng
off
.
“
Hey
…Igoty
out
hef
ood.
”
Hereachedf
oritandhandedi
tov
er.Mi
asmi
l
ed.
“
Thanksbabe.”
Mia’sphonerang,herboyf
riendlookedatheruncl e
call
ing.Heal
way scall
edeverysingledayandnot
thatitbot
her
edhi m,heactuall
yunder stoodsince
shehadexplainedthathehadpl ayedt hefat
her
fi
gureinherl
ifetheti
meherf atherdied.Her educed
thev ol
umeassheanswer ed.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Heybabe,
sti
l
latschool
?”
“
No,
Iam onmywayhome.
”
“
Iam t
hinki
ngofcomi
ngt
her
etoseey
ou.
”
“
Real
l
y?”
“
Yes,
Imi
ssy
ou.
”
“
Imi
ssy
out
oo.
”
“
Thenit
’sset
,Iam comi
ng.Di
dyour
ecei
vet
he
money
?”
“
Yes,
thanky
ou.
”
“
Iwi
l
lseey
out
omor
rowt
hen?
”
“
Yes.Iam r
eal
l
yexci
ted.
”
“
Okbabe,
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Shehungupt
henlookedatherboy f
ri
end.“Babe,
my
uncl
eiscomi
ng!Iam soexci
ted.Ihaven’
tseenhim
i
nawhi l
e.
“
Youl
ookcut
ewhenhappy
.”
Shel
aughed.“
Thanksmot
howame.Babywee,
when
areyousendingthemoney?Kanamyscr
eenneeds
tobefixed.Idon’
twantt
okeepaski
ngmysist
erfor
ever
ything.
”
“
Howmuchdoy
ouwant
?”
“
P800wi
l
lbeenough.
,
”
Hegav
eherhi
sphone.“
Ewal
l
eti
ttoy
our
sel
f.
”
Miareachedf orthephonethenewall
etedhersel
f
P1000wi thasmi le.Shel
eanedoverandkissedher
boyf
riend.‘Thanksbabe.Il
oveyou.”
Theboyf
ri
endsmil
edstari
ngatherpr
ett
yfacet
hen
tur
nedbackt
otheroadfeel
ingl
ucky.

*
**

Emaf
inal
l
ypar
kedi
nfr
ontofhi
sgat
ewi
thasmi
l
e.
“
Iam her
e.”
Ronacal
l
edWazhaashelookedathi
scarst
il
l
par
kedwher
ehehadlef
tit
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Wazha,
opent
hegat
e.”
“
Sir
?”
“
Iam att
hegat
e,openup.
”
“
Oh,
Iam notathome.
”
“
Wher
ear
eyou?Who’
swi
thmyki
ds?
”
“Wehadt omov ewit
hKenny
.Wear
est
ayi
ngwi
th
heratherhouse.”
“
Uhok,
sowher
ear
emyhousekey
s.”
“
Theyar
eher
ewi
thKenny
.”
“
Ok,
Iam comi
ngt
her
e.”
Hehungupandl
ookedatEma.“Wazhasaysshei
s
st
ayi
ngwit
hKennytoget
herwi
ththeki
ds.
”
“
Ioncebumpedi
ntot
hem atSpa,
Qdi
dn’
tev
engr
eet
me.
”
“
Let
’sgot
oKenny
’shouse.
”
“
Ok.Ihopeshedoesn’
tat
tacky
ou.
”
“
Shewoul
dn’
ttr
y.”
Emaj oi
nedtheroadanddr oveaway.Hedirectedher
toKenny’shouse.Emaf i
nal l
yparkedi
nf r
ontofthe
housewher eawhiteRubiconwaspar ked.He
steppedoutandwal kedinsidethegatepassingher
car.Heknockedont hedoort henopenedand
walkedin.Wazhawal kedfrom thebedrooms.
“
Sir
…”
“
Hey
,wher
eisshe?
”
“
Inherbedr
oom.Shesai
dIshoul
dgi
vey
ou.
”
Ronat ookthekeysthenmadehi swaytoher
bedroom.Heopenedt hedoorandwalkedin.Kenny
turnedinherthongonly,shequi
ckl
ycoveredher
breastashisdickjer
ked.
“Whatar
eyoudoi
ngi
nmyr
oom?Iam dr
essi
ng.Get
out
!”
“
Whyar
eyouscr
eami
ng?
”
Shequickl
ypickedherdressthenputiton.The
peachbodycondresshuggedherbodyst oppingat
hermidthi
ghs.Thedr esssqueezedherbreast
exposi
nghercleavage.
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“
Cany
ougo?
”
“
Iaskedy
ouaquest
ion.
”
“Ronawee,youcamef oryourkeys.Nowgo.Kanteo
kaennesewagago, (
Whereisy ournurse?)l
eavemy
houseandgot oyourbeauti
fulheartgir
lf
ri
end.Wa
mbora,Ki
ngKongogoemet si
.(Youar ebor
ingme,
KingKongiswait
igforyou.)
”
“
Thatmout
hofy
our
s…”
“
Thatmout hofmineeng?Leavemyhouse.Todayi
f
y
out r
yitIwil
lmakesureyouroti
njai
l
.Please
l
eave.
”
“
Obonawena!
”
Kennypickedherheelsandputthem on.Shelooked
atherfacefi
xingherhairwhi
lehestared.Shel
ooked
atherbodythensmi l
ed.Thoseexer
cisesshewas
doi
ngdef i
nit
elyworked.
Ronawatchedherasshepi ckedherf r
agranceand
j
ustspray
edabit.Shepickedherpur selooking
i
nside,
herphonerangthenshepi cked.
“
Hey
,Iam comi
ng.
”
Shehungupandl
ookedatRonast
andi
ngbyher
door
.
“
Kekopagotsamaye.(
CanIpl
easego?
)Ify
ouwant
t
ost
ayhere,
choicei
syour
s.”
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“Iam goi
ngoutwi thaf r
iend.Cany oupl easemov e
Arona.Thisisnolongerf unny.Justmont hsback
youtri
edkill
ingmef orthatnur seandt odayy ouare
hereagain.Iam si
ckoft hisgame.Iam t i
redofit,
it’
s
bori
ngandexhaust ing.Don’tyougett i
redt oo?Iam
wornout.Iam ti
redoft hisbackandf or t
h.Youwer e
ri
ghttomov eonandIam doi ngt hesamet oo.Can
wenotf i
ghtaboutit?Got oyourgir
lf
riend, youwil
l
neverhearacompl aintfr
om meagai n.Ihav e
acceptedthatwehav ereachedt heend.Letme
mov eon.”
Ronawal kedtothewi
ndowwher
ehel
ookedata
fancysportscar
.
“
Who’
sthat
?”
“
Myboy
fri
end.By
e.”
Ronapull
edherbacki
nthebedr
oom angr
il
ythen
l
ockedthedoorandputt
hekeysinhi
spocket.
“
Warekemang?Andbecar
eful
howy
ouanswerme,
otl
alel
akanaKenei
l
we.
”
Kennylookedathim knowi
nghewaspr obably
l
ookingforeveryreasont
oslapherbuthertongue
burntasshelookedathim.
“Wheny ouwerefuckingt hatKingKongodiradilove
bit
eslikeaspi nel
esst eenagerIdidn’
tsayanyt
hing,
youtri
edt oki
llmef orthatthi
ng.Letmebe!This
rel
ati
onshi phasruni t
’scauseebi l
eesetseembor a.
Unlockt hisdoor,
myboy fri
endiswaiti
ng.Youhave
norightt obeangr y
.Wear ebothnothappywit
h
eachot her,st
opf orci
ngt hi
s.”
“Youar enotgoi ngwi t
hhim.Tellhi
my ouhav e
changedy ourmi nd.Iam notevendati
ngEma.I twas
j
ustsex, howdoy ouexpectmet ostaysolong
withoutsex?AndIhadev eryri
ghtt
obeangr ythat
night.Youwal kedoutonmeandy ourkidsandjust
showup, noremor seinst
eadyouopent hatmouthof
yours.Theonl
ythi
ngIam gui
lt
yofi
ssuf
focat
ingy
ou
withthepil
l
ow.Youarenotgoi
ngwi
thhi
m.”
Kennyansweredherr
ingi
ngphone.“
Ronahas
l
ockedmei nsi
dethebedr
oom.Hewon’tletmego.
”
“
Iam comi
ng.
”
Shedr
oppedt
hecal
l
.“Hei
scomi
ng.
”
“
Todowhat ?Toli
stentousfuck?Causethat
’s
what’
sgoi
ngtohappen,otsamayaopakisakuku
yame,otl
anyel
awai t
seKenny?”
“
Ify
our
apeme-
“
“
Iam goi
ngt
ofucky
ou.
”
Ther
ewasal
oudknockont
hedoorsecondsl
ater
.
“
Kenny
!”
Cal
mly
,Ronawal
kedt
oherensui
tet
henf
lushedt
he
key
.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#98

Kennylookedathi
m ashewal
kedf
rom t
he
bat
hroom calml
y.
“
Stopt
his,
opent
hisdoor
.”
Ronat
ookof
fhi
sshoesandhi
shi
st-
shi
rt
..
“
Kenny
!”Tat
socal
l
edf
rom out
side.
“
Hehasl
ockedt
hedoorhewon’
topen.
”
“
Ihavef
lushedthekey
,youarenotgoi
ngany
wher
e.
Noonei
sl eav
ingther
oom.”
Kennyl ookedathimtearf
ull
y.“
Whyar eyoudoi
ng
thi
s?Cany ouj
ustleavemealone?Pleasegotoyour
gir
lfr
iend!Youtri
edkil
li
ngmef orher
.Whyar eyou
doingthistome? ”
“
Youarenotgoi
ngwi t
hhi
m,noonei
sleav
ingt
his
r
oom t
il
lwefixt
hings.
”
Tearsrol
l
eddownKenny’scheeks.“
Yousleptwi
th
herevenaft
erIcameback.Ihaveneversl
eptwi
th
anyoneaft
erImetyou.Igaveyoumyal landInever
hel
dback.Youfail
edtorespectme.Iam tir
edofthi
s.
Iwanttobehappy,ev
enifit’
snotwithyouit’
sfi
ne.I
wanttobehappy.Youbrokeme, youhavenor i
ght
tobedoingthi
stome.Idon’tdeserv
ethis.
”
Hel
ookedatherandsi
ghed.“
Ijustwantust
otal
k.”
“Butyoucamewit
hWakanda!Youbroughthertomy
house.Koor
eyouareful
lofshi
tRona!Youbri
ngthat
womant omyhouse!Myhouse?”
“
Iwi
l
ltel
lhert
ogo.
”
“
Opent
hisdoor
,kebat
agot
samay
a.(
Iwantt
ogo.
)”
Tat
sobangedt
hedoor
.
“
Ifmyki
dsareher
eandthisf
ool
keepsmaki
ngnoi
se
l
i
kethi
s,ot
sil
egonyel
a.”
“
Opent
hedoor
!”
Ronapickedherupandt
hrewheronthebedthen
puthi
shandonhermouthlooki
nginhereyes.
“
Yourai
seyourvoi
ceoryouinsul
tmeIam goingto
f
uckyourmouthsohardyouwon’tbeablet
ospeak
f
orweeksandIam notj
okingwit
hy ou.
”Hetookof
f
hishandfr
om hermouthandlookedather,mor
e
l
ikedari
ngher
.Shelookedathim si
lent
ly.
“Good.Wear egoingtotal
kl i
kegrownadults.You
arenolongeraki danymore.Thi
sisnotjusta
rel
ati
onshi
pt hatinvol
vesmeandy ouonl
y,therear
e
fourhumansi nvolv
ed.”
“
Didy
ouuseacondom?
”
Hel
ookedather
.“No.Butshei
sinf
ert
il
e.”
Shelookedathi
mforamomentt ryi
ngt obestr
ong
buttear
sfil
l
edhereyes,itwasasifshehadbeen
wreckedbyatsumani.Herli
pstr
embl ed,sheputher
handsoverherf
acecrying.

*
**

Outsi
de,Emasatinthecarcuriousl
ylooki
ngatt he
house.Shetookherphoneandcal l
edhim butthe
phonerangunanswered.Shesighedthenconti
nued
si
tti
ngbutthemoreshesatt here,t
hemor eshegot
curi
ousastowhatwasgoi nginsidethehouse.She
steppedoutofthecart
henslowl
ywalkedinsi
dethe
yardalr
eadydreadi
nganexchangeofwordswith
Kenny.
Sheslowl
ywal
kedinsi
dethehousethenlookedata
manwhowaswal ki
ngwithaknifef
rom theki
tchen
whil
eWazhawatchedsi
lent
ly.Emalookedather.
“
What
’sgoi
ngonWazha?Wher
eisRona?
”
“
Hei
sint
hebedr
oom wi
thKenny
.”
Ema’
shear
tski
pped.“
Doi
ngwhat
?”
“
Idon’
tknow.
”
Emawalkedtothedoorwher
ethemanwast
ryi
ngt
o
unscr
ewthedoorhandl
e.
“Rona!”Sheknockedonthedoorbutt
her
ewas
sil
ence.Themanl ookedather
.
“
Whoar
eyou?
”
“
Rona’
sgi
rl
fr
iend.
”
“
Thammat
ell
yourboy
fri
endt
oletKennygo.
”
Emaknockedont
hedoor
.“Rona,
pleasel
et’
sgo.Let
herbe.Shei
swai
ti
ngf
oryoutoatt
ackhersoshe
cansendy
oubackt
ojai
l
.Pl
easel
eav
eheral
one.
”
Sheli
stenedcaref
ull
ythoughther
ewasnot
hingshe
coul
dhear .Shehi
tthedoor.
“Rona!Pl
easel
et’
sgo!Pl
ease.Iam beggi
ngy
ou,
let
Kennygo.”
Shesi
ghedtearf
ull
yatt
hesil
enceasshewonder
ed
whatwasgoingonbehi
ndthecloseddoor
.
“Youknowwhat?Iam cal
l
ingt
hepol
i
ce.
”Tast
otook
outhi
sphone,
Emanodded.
“Iam cal
li
nghisbrot
her
s.Theycangett
hrough
him.”Shewalkedbackt
owher eWazhawas.
“
Wazha, cal
lhi
sbr
other
s.It
hinksomet
hingi
s
wrong.
”

*
**

Atsi
l
egotApril
’smarshmall
owst ogetherwithafew
moresnacksthatshewouldprobablylove.Hepaid
fori
tal
lthenwalkedoutoftheshopcal l
i
ngher.
“
Hey
,di
dyougett
hem?
”
“
Yesbabe.Iam onmywayback.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Ist
her
eany
thi
ngy
oumayneed?Any
thi
ngatal
l
.”
Apr
ill
aughed.“
Iam f
ine,
Ijustwanty
ou.Come
home.”
“
Iam comi
ng.Howi
sthebaby
?”
“
Thebabyi
sfi
ne.Heorshemi
ssesy
ou.
”
“
Juni
ormi
ssesme,
Iam onmyway
.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Hehur
ri
edtohiscar
,Boi
neel
onot
icedhi
mfr
om af
ar
t
henwalkedov
er.
“
Atsi
l
e?Wow!
”
Henoddedacknowl
edgi
ngher
.“Hey
..
”
Neelosmil
ed.“
Wow!Ican’
tbel
i
evet
his.Iam so
happytoseeyou.
”
“
Yeah,
yout
oo.
”
Hegoti
nhi
scaranddr
oveof
fanswer
ingWazha’
s
cal
l
.
“
Hel
l
o?
“
Sir
,Mr.Mot
samicametotheKenny’shouse,
Ithink
t
herei
sanot
herf
ightgoi
ngon.Kenny’smalef
riend
i
shereandi
sMr.Motsamai
’snurse.
”
“
Fuck!Iam comi
ng.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
At
sil
edr
oppedt
hecal
landqui
ckl
ycal
l
edLebi
tso.
“
Eit
a…”
“Lai
taka,youar etheonewhost ay scloserto
Kenny’shouse.Ronagotr el
easedt oday,nowheis
atKenny’shousehar assingher.Coul dyougothere?
Ihavetodr opof fMmaAt si
l
e’scravingsthenIwil
l
come.Iwi l
l br
ingMaat l
a.”
“
Ok.
”
At
sil
equi
ckl
ydr
ovehomet
odr
opofApr
il
’sgoodi
es.

*
**
AtMaunInt
ernat
ionalAir
port,
Nanaowalkedout
whi
letheai
rpor
tstaffpushedherbel
ongingsbehi
nd
her
.Sheputonhersunglassesandcall
edanumber .
“Hil
ove,Ihav
earri
vedfr
om Thai
l
and,
ber
eady
,we
areshi
ppingtheor
ders.
”
“
Yesmam.
”
“
Shar
p.”
Shecal
l
edanot
hernumber
.“Hel
l
o?”
“Hey,i
t’
sNana,myl ov
eIam backf r
om Thai
land,I
havethefr
agrancesandkef i
rstcome,f
ir
stserved,
I
gotthebest
,forbothfemalesandmales.Pr
ice
rangesbet
weenP300t oP5000.”
“
Thammawenakeabat
la.(
Iwant
.)
”
“Iwi
llbeatmyshopt omorrowmorning,It
houghtI
wouldtellyouf
ir
stsothatwenayoucomet omy
houserightnowandtakeyourt
hings.”
“
Ok,
Iam onmyway
.Thanky
ou.
”
Mot
husi
huggedherassheappr
oachedt
hecar
.
“
Heybabe…”
Shesmi
l
edasher
ubbedherbump.“
Hey
.Imi
ssed
you.
”
Mothusit
ookherbelongi
ngsandpackedthem i
nthe
bootwhil
eshegotinthecarmakingmorephone
cal
lstohercust
omers.Mothusi
final
l
ygotinthecar
.
“
Youl
ookgood.
”
Nanaolaughedashedr oveoff
.“BabeIhaveonl
y
beengoneforfourdays.Igotyouacoupleoft
hings,
youwil
lgetthem at10%discount.
”
“
WhydoIhav
etopay
,Iam y
ourhusband!
”
Shel aughed.“
Thi
sisbusinessbabe.Idon’
tmi x
businessandpleasur
e.Notafterhowy oumademe
presentasifIwaspresenti
ngtofatwhitepeoplei
n
suit
s.”
Mot husi
chuckleddri
v i
ngthem home.Awhilelat
er
theybothsteppedout,Nanaowal kedt
owardsthe
housewhi l
eMot husioff
loadedthebootcal
l
ingLefa.
Lefahuggedherbyt hedoor .
“
Heymyboy
…”
“
Iam f
ine.
”
Shesmi l
edthenwal kedi
nsidethehouseand
huggedhersonbef oregoi
ngt othebedr
oom taki
ng
offhershoes.Shepostedthepictur
esofhergoods
onfacebookputti
nguppr i
ces.Selet
soimmediatel
y
call
ed.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,thammaIwantt
hoseper
fumes.
”
“
Ok,
whi
chones?
”
Sel
etsosai
dheror
derwhi
l
eNanaowr
otei
tdown.
“Ok,makepaymentandtomorr
owy out
hingswi
l
lbe
deli
ver
edthr
oughspri
ntcour
ier
s.”
“
Thanks.If
eel sojeal
ouswaitse,
youar
emakingso
muchmoney .Isawy ourf
acebookpageandal
ready
youhavemoret han30Kfoll
owers.”
Nanaolaughed.“
Shar
plov
e,j
ustar
ri
ved.Iam
exhaust
ed.”
“
Ok.
”
ShehungupasMot
husi
joi
nedher
.Hel
ookedather
swol
l
enf
eet
.
“
Iwi
l
lruny
ouabat
hthenaf
termassagey
ou.
”
“
Ok.
”

*
**

Lebi
tsopar
kedhiscarbehindasportscarthen
hurr
iedi
nsi
dethegateandwal kedi
nsidethehouse.
HelookedatEmabeforeturni
ngtotheman.
“
Wher
ear
ethey
?”
Emapoi nt
ed.“
Inthebedroom.Tat
socall
edthe
pol
ice.Canyoutal
kt ohi
m bef
oretheyar
ri
ve?Kenny
i
sjustlooki
ngforeveryr
easontosendhi
m backto
j
ail
.”
Bi
tsowal
kedt
othedoort
henknocked.“
Rona!
”
Hel
ist
enedv er
ycl
osel
ythenmovedback.“
Iam sur
e
t
heyaref
ine.Whywouldyoucal
lthepol
i
ce?”
“Hei
sholdi
ngheri
nsi
det
her
ewi
thouther
per
missi
on.
”
Bi
tsol
ookedatTast
o.“
Andwhot
hef
uckar
eyou?
”
“
Kenny
’sbouy
fri
end.
”
“Kenny’
swhat?Kenny’
smagadiwaspai d,shei
s
anotherman’
sproper
ty.Koor
ewat l
waelawena, o
tsamayaobit
sabasadibabathogel
frenteyagago.O
tl
waelamasepawenasaan!”
Emsshookherhead.“
Theybr
okeup.Pl
easedon’t
taket
hisl
i
ght
ly.Thepol
icewi
l
lsoonbehere.Tal
kto
Rona.
”
“
Whatwoul
dIsaytoRonabecausehei
swi
thhi
s
wi
fei
nsi
dether
e?”
At
sil
eandMaat
lar
ushedi
n.“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
Cal
mly,Lebi
tsotur
nedtothem.“KanaRonai sbusy
wit
hhiswifeandtheset
woar edist
urbingt
hem.
Ebi
lemothakaoareKennyishisgir
lfr
iend.
”
Maat
laf
rowned.“
Gir
lf
ri
end?Kennyi
sMr
s.Mot
samai
.
Shei
smarri
ed.
”
Emashookherheadwit
hasi
gh.Ther
ewasknock
fr
om i
nsi
detheroom.
“
Wazha!Comeher
e.”
Wazhaqui
ckl
yst
oodupasKennyspokewi
thal
ow
voi
ce.
“
Kenny
?”
“It
hinkther
earesparekey
sintheki
tchen.Ontop.I
am notsureifaspar
ekeyfort
hisr
oom isther
e,go
andcheck.”
“
Ok.
”
Theyal
lwatchedasWazhawentt ot heki
tchenand
camebackwi t
hsomekey s.Shetr
iedacouplethen
unl
ockedthedoor.Kennyopeneditnowinaf l
ared
l
ongdress.
“
Thanks.
”
Shesl
owl
ywal
kedoutt
henl
ookedatTat
so.Let
’s
go.
”
“
Arey
ouok?
”
Shenodded.“
Ng.Let
’sgo.
”
Shewal kedpasthi
sbrot
hersandf
ri
endwhilet
hey
observedjusthowslowshewaswalki
ng.Rona
fi
nall
ywal kedout
.
“
Lebat
langl
ona?(
Whatdoy
ouwant
?)”
Maatl
alookedatt
hesmi
l
eonhi
sfacet
hent
heyal
l
l
aughed.
“
Osekawat
samekay
aanat
lhemonna.Kant
ekeng?
”
“
Mxm,
Emal
etsgo.
”
Theywalkedout,
shecoul
dn’tsmellanyt
hingf
rom
hi
mj ustt
hathewassmelli
ngf r
esh.Theygoti
nthe
cart
henEmal ookedathi
m.
“
Whathappenedi
nsi
det
her
e?”
“
Wemanagedt
otal
kaboutt
heki
dswi
thout
f
ight
ing.
”
“
Butt
her
ewasj
ustsi
l
ence.
”
“
Youcoul
dn’
thear
?Butwewer
etal
ki
ngsol
oud.
”
“
Icoul
dn’
thearany
thi
ng.
”
Heshr
uggedtaki
ngouthi
sphonewhil
eEmadr
ove.
Awhil
elat
ershepar
kedinfr
ontofhi
sgat
e.
“
Canwepl
easet
alk?
”
“
Iam sot
ir
ed.Canwet
alkt
omor
row,
Iwi
l
lcal
lyou.
”
Hekissedhercheekthensteppedoutpr
essingthe
gateremote.Hewalkedinandclosedhi
sgate.She
rev
ersedthendroveofft
ryi
ngt ohol
dhertears.

*
**

Meanwhi
l
eTat
sowal
kedi
nsi
dehi
shousewi
th
Kenny
.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
“
Ng…If
ell
yest
erday
.It
’spai
nful
towal
k.”
“
Oh,
sor
ry.
”
Shesatdownont hecoucht henhewentt ohis
ki
tchent opourthem dr
inksanddi shupthelunch.
Hewal kedbackt ot
hesitti
ngr oom andf
oundher
sl
eepingonhi scouch.
.
.
Goodmor
ning,
lastni
ght
'si
nser
t,apol
ogi
es,
Idoz
ed
of
f.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#99

Lateron,
Tat
sofi
nali
zedadeal i
nasky
pemeet
ing
thensmil
edatMr.Johnsons.
“
Youwi
l
lnotr
egr
ett
his.
”
Mr.Johnsonssmiled.“
Iknow.Ihear
dfr
om a
busi
nesspartnert
hatyouarethemostrel
i
abl
e
man.”
Kennywhowassl eepi
ngont
hecouchsl
owl
ywoke
upandlookedathim.
“
Ok,
wewi
l
ltal
k.”
“
Ok,
Ial
readyspoket
omyassi
stant
.Shewi
l
lcal
l
y
ou.
”
“
Ok.
”
Heclosedhisl
apt
opt
hensmi
l
edst
ari
ngatKennyas
shesatupr
ight
.
“
Hi…”
Shesmil
edback.“
Hey
…howl
onghav
eIbeen
sl
eepi
ng?”
Tastol
ookedathi
swatch.“
3hour
s.Theki
ds
keepi
ngyouawake?”
“
Yes,
Iam sor
ry.Iknowt
hiswassupposedt
obeour
-
“
“
It
’sok.Ar
eyouhungr
y?”
“
Yes.
”
Hewentt
ohiski
tchenandcamebackmi
nut
esl
ater
wi
thherf
ood.
“
CanIuset
het
oil
etf
ir
st?
”
“
Yeah.Thatway
.”Hepoi
nted.
Shest oodupandwal kedtot hebathroom whereshe
peedwi thaf rown.Shefini
shedupandcl osedthen
toil
etseatandsatont op.Shepulledherpantiesto
thesidestaringatherpussy .Withasi gh,
shef i
nal
l
y
walkedoutt henwentbackt othesitt
ingroom and
start
edeating.
“Younev
err
eal
l
ytol
dmewhathappenedwi
thy
our
ex.”
Kennyl ookedathim.“ UhIhadPr enatal depr ession
andt hi
ngswer enotokbet weenus.It houghti t
woul dbebet t
erwhenIgav ebirt
hbuti twaswor se.I
gav ehi
mt heki dsandIwasn’ tthebestper soni nthe
wor d.Matteroffact,Iwasthewor st.Isai dmean
things,Iwas…Iwasnotok.Iwentt oSbr anaand
nev ert
oldhim.9mont hslaterIshowupathi sdoor
andhei swit
hhi snewgirl
friend.Il
osti tthenhe
slappedmeandt r
iedtoki
llme. ”
Tat
sonodded.“
Isee,
soy
ouwer
ethet
oxi
cone?
”
Kennylaughed.“
Yes.ButIwasn’
tdoi
ngi
ton
purpose.
”
Tat
sosmiled.“
Notal
otofwomenwoul
dadmi
ttobe
i
nthewrong.”
“
Iwaswr ong.Iexpectedtof
indhim wai
tingf
orme
f
orget
ti
ngitdoesn’treal
lyworkl
ikethat
.”
“
Doy ousti
ll
lov
ehim?Doy
oust
il
lwantt
owor
k
t
hingsthr
ough?”
KennylookedatTatso.“
Ilov
ehim.I ft
ell
y ouIdon’
tI
wouldbelying.Toyou,t
omy sel
f.IhavelovedRona
fort
helongesttime.Hehasbeent heonlymaninmy
hear
tforuhh…almost…”Shecountedwit
hher
fi
nger
sthenfrowned.“Wow…mor ethan10year
s.”
“
10YEARS?
”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Imethi
m whenIwas19…”
“
Wow!
”
Shetearf
ull
ylaughed.“
Iknow.Wow….10y
ear
sand
4kidslat
er…”
“
Andy
ouwantt
owal
kawayf
rom t
hat
?”
Sheshr
ugged,
atearr
unni
ngdownhercheek.
“
Whyhasn’
themar
ri
edy
ou?
”
Kennylookedathim.“Idon’
tknow.Ourhappinessis
al
way sshortl
iv
ed.Wear eneverjusthappywi
thout
somethinghappeni
ng.It’
sal
way sonet hi
ngaf
terthe
other
.”Tearsf
il
ledhereyes.
Tatsosatbesi deherandpulledherinhi
sarms.
“Beingtogetherformorethan10y earsdoesn’t
meany ouwi l
lendupwiththatverysameper son.
Somet imesal li
t’
smeanttodoi steachyou
somet hing.Sometimesit
’sjustnotmeanttobe. ”
“
Idon’
tthi
nkIcanev
erl
oveany
onel
i
kehi
m.”
“
Becauseyouhavenevert
ri
ed.Howwilly
ouknowi
f
y
ouhav enev
ertr
ied?Haveyouevert
ri
ed?”
Shel ookedathim andshookherhead.“ Exactly.Iam
notgoi ngtosayany t
hingaboutRonaory our
rel
at i
onshipbecausehonest lyIdon’
tknowwhaty ou
twohav ebeenthroughbutwhatIcant ell youisthat
wheni t
’snowtoxic,i
t’
snol ongerhealt
hy .Ifi
tnow
i
nv olvesyoubeingbeat en,
y oubeingsuffocated,it’
s
nol ongerhealt
h.Idon’tknowhi m butmay behe
feelsthatbecauseit’
sbeen10y earsheisent it
ledto
hav i
ngy ou.”
Kennysi
ghed.
“Iam justsayi
ng,it
’smyanal
ysisbutIdon’
tknow.I
n
thelasttenyears,youhav
eonlybeenwithhi
m?
Kissedhim only?”
Shenodded.“
Yes.
”
“
Howmanyexesdoy
ouhav
e?”
“
1.”
Tat
sol
aughed.“
Fuck!NowIcanunder
standhi
s
behav
ior
.IguesslennaIwoul
dbehaveliket
hati
fI
hadbeenwit
ht hesamewomanf orover10year
s.”
Kennyshy
lysmi
l
ed.“
Mxm.
”
“No..Iam beingrealr
ightnow.10yearsofthesame
personf eel
slikemarri
age.Therei
snor i
ngbutit’
s
mar r
iage.Youonlyknowhi m.Iwantust obefri
ends.
Iam notgoi ngtogetint
oar el
ati
onshipandstanda
chanceofbei ngheartbrokenwhenIknowy oulove
himl i
ket hi
s.Iwantt
oknowy oubett
erand
understand.”
Kennysmiledthenl
aughed.“
Iwoul
dli
ket
obe
fr
iendsbutRonais-
”
“Iwi
l
ldeal
wit
hhi
m.Whatdi
dhesayi
nsi
det
he
bedr
oom?”
“
Hesai
dhei
sgoi
ngt
opunchy
ou.
”
“
Iwi
ll
waitforhi
m.Het
hinkshei
stheonl
ymani
n
t
heworl
d.”
“
Ronaor
atadr
ama.
”
“
Wel
lthi
stimearoundhehasmethi
smat
ch.Ar
e
y
ougett
ingbackwit
hhim?”
“
Iwantt
ofocusonmygar
den.
”
Tast
osmi
l
ed.“
That
’snotananswer
.”
Shesi
ppedherdrinkthenhel
aughed.“
Howi
sit
goi
ng?Thegarden.”
Kennysmiledexcit
edly.“It
’slookinggood, wear e
almostdone,youshouldseei t
.It’
slookingbeautif
ul,
Iwantedtohav esomethingl i
keasmal lpondbutit’
s
costl
y.Iwasthinki
ngofsel li
ngt enmor ehectaresof
thefar
m butIam justgoingt ousepar tofmy
i
nherit
ancefrom myf ather.Ial
readygotpeopl eand
theyarest
arti
ngnextweek. ”
“
Apondwi
l
lat
tractpeopl
e.”
“
Itwi
ll
.Iwanti
tabi
tbi
gformokor
o(canoe)r
ides
whi
chIwil
lchar
gef
or.
”
“
Greati
dea.
”
“Iwasthinkingt
obui
ldsomet
hingli
keanoutdoor
rest
aurant…wherepeopl
ecanholdthei
rmeeti
ngs.I
gotmor eflower
ssopeopl
ecanalsocomeandsee
thefl
ower s.”
“
Ilov
eyourbusi
nessspi
ri
t.
”
Shel
aughed.“
Thanks.
”
Theycont
inuedchat
ti
ngaboutbusi
ness.

*
**

Namet
sowat
chedasMaat
lapackedt
heal
cohol
in
t
hecar
.
“
Whatt
imear
eyoucomi
ngback?
”
“Lat
eron.Ronaneedst
obetal
kedto.Heneedst
o
star
tbehavi
ngli
keagrownman.”
“
Whati
fhehasr
eal
l
ymov
edon?
”
“
Ronal
ovesKenny
.”
“
Youdon’
tknowt
hat
.Youjustwanthi
mtogoback
t
oherbuti
sshewor
thi
t?”
“Yousoundbi t
terever
yti
mewet al
kabouther ,you
neverhaveany t
hingposi
ti
vetosay .Ii
gnoredthe
factthaty
ouoncewant edmybr otheratsomepoi nt
butthisbi
tter
nessisannoyi
ng.Youal waystrybyall
meanst osaysomet hi
ngnegati
veaboutKenny ,
it’
s
get
ti
ngbori
ng.Onewoul
dswearKennydi
d
somethi
ngsobigt
oyou.
”
Namet
sol
ookeddownembar
rassed.
“
Whydoy
ouhat
esomuch?Doy
oust
il
lwantRona?
”
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Iam goi
ng.
.”
Hegotinthecaranddroveoff
.Nametsowal
ked
backi
nsideandsighedsi
tti
ngdown.

*
**

Emasatonhercouchwat chi
ngTVbuthermindwas
preoccupied.Hersi
sterknockedt
henwalkedi
nwit
h
hertoddlers.Emasmi l
edgetti
ngup.
“
Ohmy
!Vee!
”
Herni
eceandnephewhuggedhert
ight
lyasshe
l
aughed.“
Imissedyouguy
s.”
“
Imi
ssedy
out
ooaunt
y.”
“
Iam sohappyt
oseey
ou.
”
Shet
urnedt
ohersist
erwhohuggedher.“
Hey
…I
cameassoonasIgotyourmessage.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Emilookedatherki
ds.“Guy
s,si
there,
don’tdowhat
youarenotsupposedtodo.Ema,come.”
Emafol
l
owedhersi
sterout
sidet
hent
heygoti
nthe
car
.
“
Whathappened?
”
“
Idon’tknow.Wewenttocol
l
ecthiskey
st henhe
l
ockedhimselfi
nherbedr
oom wi
thherforabout30
minut
esorso.”
“
Whatwer
etheydoi
ng?
”
“
Idon’
tknow,
hesay
stheywer
etal
ki
ng.
”
“
Lockedi
nthebedr
oom?
”
“Ther
ei snosi
gnt
hatt
heyhadsexandKennyhasa
boyfr
iend.
”
“Therei
snofut
urewi
tht
hisguy
.Cany
ouj
ustl
eav
e
him al
one?
”
Emalookedathert
ryingtoholditi
nbutshebr
oke
downcryi
ng.“
IwishIdidn’tlov
ehim.Il
ovehi
m so
muchmyhear ti
sbreaking.Idon’
tknowhowIgot
mysel
fthi
sdeepintoit.
”
Emi
sadl
ylookedatherol
dersi
stert
henhuggedher
.
“
Shhh…y ouwil
lfi
ndamanwhowi l
llovey
ouand
v
alueyou.Youwon’thav
etocr
ythen.”
“
Thatwi
l
lneverhappenf
orme.Theywi
l
lal
way
suse
meandl
eaveme.”
“
Don’
tbesonegat
ive.
”
“
Iwantababy
.”
“
What
?”
“
Iwantababy.AtleastIcanhav
eababy
.Mar
ri
age
i
snotforev
eryonebutIwantababy
.”
“
Aren’
tyout
heonet
hatal
way
ssai
dyouj
ustdon’
t
wantt
obeababymama?”
“Iam notgoi
ngtogetmar r
ied.Iam goi
ngt
oaccept
that
.Iwantababy .Iam fer
til
e,onceIsl
eepwi
th
Ronat henIwi
ll
transferandr ai
semybabyonmy
own.”
*
**

Esiparkedhercarandsteppedoutofhercarat
Rona’shouse.Sheknockedonhisdoor,Rona
openedshirt
lessthensmil
ed.
“
Hey
…”
“
CanIcomei
n?”
“
Yeah.
”
Shewal
kedi
nhol
dingherhandbagt
hent
urnedt
o
hi
m.
“
Iam di
sappoi
nted.Inevercoul
dhavethoughty
ou
woul
ddothesamet hingMaat l
adi
d.”
Ronashrugged.“
Iam human.Imessupt
oo.Il
ove
Kenny
,youknowt hat
.”
“
Tosuf
focat
eherwi
thapi
l
low?
”
“
Ireal
l
ydon’
tknowwhatgoti
ntome.
”
“
Youar
enodi
ff
erentf
rom y
ourbr
other
.Iguesst
hey
areri
ghtwhent heysaybir
dsofthefurt
herf
lock
toget
her.Ican’
tbeli
eveIevenvouchedfory
ou.My
fri
enddeservesbett
erthananabusiveman.”
Ronawal kedcl osert oEsi breathingonherl ips“ And
youar etheonet ojudgeme?Youar enotper fect
Moesi .Youactal lrighteousf orgetti
ngy ourownsi ns.
Iwasgoi ngt hroughal ot,mygi rl
fri
endwasi njail
, I
wasst r
uggl ingwithmynewbor nsonandIwasn’ tin
myr ightful stat
eofmi nd.Ihadal otgoingon.Butf or
you,y oudi dn’thaveanypr oblem, youwer eper fectly
fi
nebei ngundermescr eamingmynamescr atching
mybackory ouhav ef orgotten?Youar enof ri
endof
Kennyi fy oucanf uckhermani nherabsenceand
mov eonl i
kenot hinghappened.Andy ouar enosai nt
eit
heri fyoucanf ucky ourthenhusband’ sbr other
thenwentbackhomeandpl ayedt heinnocent
perfectwi fe.”Acardr oveinout side,Ronamov ed
backwi t
hasmi l
e.“Notsoi nnocenthuhMoesi ?”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#100

Moesi swal
lowedmov ingbackthenRonapickedhi
s
t-
shir
tfrom thecouchandputiton.Thedoor
opened,Maat l
awalkedinwit
hthealcoholt
hen
pausedstari
ngatEsi.Ronasmiled.
“Kent
sekeomnywa,
(Iwasbei
ngshout
edat
,)
appar
entl
yIam l
i
keyounow.
”
Maatl
alaughedwal
ki
ngtot
hekit
chen.“
Nonofus
cangetthr
oughhi
m.Tal
ktohi
m Esisohedoesn’
t
becomeme. ”
Heputthebeeri
nthef
ri
dgeasRonar eachedf
orhi
s
phonechecki
ngsomet
hing.Esi
clear
edherthr
oat
.
“
Iam goi
ng.
”
Maat
lawal
kedf
rom t
heki
tchenandl
ookedather
wi
thasmil
e.
“
Letmewal
kyouout
.”
Theybot
hwal
kedout
.
“
Iwi
l
ldr
opof
ftheki
dst
omor
rowmor
ning.
”
“
Ok,
that
’sf
ine.
”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
Esi
laughed.“
Thanks.
”
“Ihopeyouspokesomesenseintohim.Kana
sometimeshebehavesl
i
keachi l
d.Gonweot l
a
retsawena.(
Maybehemightl
istentoyou.
)”
“
Ireal
l
ycan’
tbel
i
eveheal
mostki
l
ledher
.”
“
Metoo,theproblem i
sthatt
heyarenotmarr
ied,
t
heyshouldgetmarri
edandstartpl
anni
ngtogether
l
i
kearealcouple.Al
lofthi
snonsensewil
ldi
sappear
t
hen.
”
“
Yah,
letmego.Wewi
l
ltal
k.”
“
Shar
p.”
Heopenedthedoorforher
,Esismiledget
ti
nginthe
carthendr
oveoffwhil
eMaatl
awal kedbackinsi
de
thehousewher
eRonawashol dinghisphonetohis
eartaki
ngasi
pofhisbeer.
“
Whoar
eyoucal
l
ing?
”
Helookedathi
sphonewi
thasi
gh.“
Kennyi
snot
pi
cking.
”
“Don’
tyouthi
nkit’
stimey
ougotmarri
ed?Maybei
f
youwereherhusbandshewoul
dn’
tfeelt
heneedt
o
notansweryourcal
ls.
”
Ronasatdown.“Kennyostubbor
n.I
fIsuggestwe
getmarr
iedri
ghtnowot l
i
legogana.(shei
sgoingto
ref
use.
)”
“Youst i
l
lcan’tbesay i
ngthat.Mathataagagoke
Ema.( Yourpr oblem i
sEma. )Cany oustopwiththat
gir
l?Kanat hemor eyouinvolveanotherpart
y,t
he
mor eyoupushKennyawayandnextt hingyouknow
shei swithanot herman.Cany oustopthi
sgames
andmar ryy ourgi r
l?Dotherightthi
ng,makeherMr s.
Mot samai ormay beyoudon’tloveheranymore?”
“Il
oveher.Il
ovehermorethanany
thi
ng.Sheisal
lI
couldthi
nkofwhenIwasi nj
ail
andmaybeIwasn’t
thebestpart
nersheneededwhensheneededme.”
“Youwerenot
.Butnowyoucanbe.Thereisyour
chancetomakethi
ngsri
ght
.Don’tyouwantthat
kindofl
ovewher
ey oudoever
ythi
ngwithyourwif
e?
Thatki ndofl ovewher ey ouwakeev erymor ni
ngwith
herbesi dey ou.Kanamar riageisnice, evenifyou
sheget sangr y,sheisnotgoi ngtosayIam goi ng,
shei sst il
lgoi ngt osleepbesi dey ouandy oucan
makei tupt oher .Howmanymor ey ear sdoy ou
needt odot her i
ght f
ul thing?Theyar egoi ngtotake
herf r
om y ou, attheendoft heday ,shei snot
mar ri
edt oy ou.Ify out hink4ki dswi l
l holdherdown,
youar ei nf orasur pri
se.Shewi l
lstillmov eonwith
orwi thoutt hoseki ds.Imagi newhatt hatdudei s
tell
ingherr ightnow?St opt hi
s.TellEmat hatwena
youl ovey ourwomanandsetherf ree.Leeneshe
doesn’ tdeser v etobet reat edthewayy ouare
treati
ngher .Youl i
terallyf uckedKennywhi l
eshe
wasout sidewai ti
ngandbeggi ngy out ocomeout .
It’
snotf ai
r.Youmi ghtt hinky ouar eget ti
ngaway
wi t
hitt odaybutt omor rowi twil
lbeSar onaor
War onameet ingamanl ikeherf atherandmay be
theny ouwi llunder standwhatImeant .”
“
Iwasalr
eadygoingt
obr
eaki
tof
fjustt
hatIdon’
t
wantt
ohurther
.”
“
Youar
eal
readyhur
ti
ngher
,whatdoy
oumeany
ou
don’
twantt
ohur
ther
?”
Anot
hercardr
ovei
n.
“Atsi
l
eandBi
tsoar
eher
e.Wear
edoi
ngami
ni
braai
.”
“
Ok.
”
Maatl
awal
kedout,Ronat
ookhi
sphoneandl
ooked
atEsi
’
smessaeshowingont
hescr
een.
Esi
:Kennyi
smyfri
end,mor
eli
kemysist
erand
wordscan’
tev
enbegi
ntoexpl
ainhowIf
eelabout
what…
At
sil
ewal
kedi
n.“
Rona.Hel
p!”
Ronaputdownhi sphoneandwal
kedovertoAtsi
le
whowascar ry
ingmorebeerandhel
pedhim car
ryto
theki
tchen.
“Bit
sobroughtt
hemeat
,aker
eyouhav
eabr
aai
stand?
”
“
Yeah,
att
heback.
”
Theybot
hwal
kedout
side.
*
**

Tat
sopar
kedhi
scaratKenny
’sgat
e.
“
Ok,
Iwi
l
lcal
lyoul
ater
.”
“
Ok.
”
Hel
eanedoverandki
ssedher
.“NowIam t
het
hir
d
manyouhav
eev erki
ssed.
”
Kennyl
aughedt
hengotof
fhi
scarandwal
kedi
nsi
de
thegat
e.
Shel
ookedatherki
dsassoonasshewal
kedi
n,Q
wasal
readybackfr
om school
.
“
Mama!
”
“
Hey
…”
Shehuggedhimthenpickedkissedthet
ri
plet
s.
Wazhawalkedfr
om thekitchenholdi
ngt
heirf
ood.
“
HiKenny
.”
“
Hey
..
”
Kenny
’sphoner
ang.Shel
ookedatt
hescr
eent
hen
smi
l
ed.
“
Esi
..
”
“
Hey
,wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
Home.
”
“
Ok,
Ihear
dRonai
sout
.”
Kennywal
kedt
oherbedr
oom.
“
Yes.Hewasher
eear
li
eron.
”
“
Whatdi
dhesay
?”
“YouknowhowRonais.Hebr
oughthi
sgi
rl
fr
iend
andstar
tedhar
assi
ngme.”
“Whatar eyougoingtodonow?Honest l
yift
hereis
anythingIhate,i
thastobeabuse.Befor
emyf at
her
fi
nallywalkedoutonus,heusedtoabusemy
mot herandsincethen,
Iwil
lneverst
aywithaman
whof indsitoktorai
sehishandonme.Themai n
reasonIleftMaatlawasbecausehebeatme.”
“
Lennahel
aIdon’
twantt
obewi
thanabusi
veman.
”
“Thenyoushoul
dmov eon.Nextti
mehewi l
lnotonl
y
slaporsuf
focat
eyou.Hewil
lkil
lyou.Youhaveki
ds
t
othinkf
or.Iam sodi
sappoi
ntedi
nRona,
Iwon’
t
l
i
e.”
“
Hopef
ull
ywecoopar
entwi
thoutt
roubl
e.”
“
Ihopesot
oo,
howar
ethebabi
es?
”
“
Theyar
efi
ne.Youshoul
dvi
sitsomet
ime.
”
“
Def
ini
tel
y.May
bet
omor
row.
”
“
Ok.By
e.”
Kennyhungupandcal
l
edTshenol
o.
“
Iam i
nthebusgoingtoMaun.Fr
om t
her
eIwi
l
ltake
t
hebustoShakawe.”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Ok.
”
“
Thanky
ouf
ort
alki
ngt
ome.
”
“
It
’sokl
ove.Ij
ustwanty
out
ogetbet
ter
.”
“Ihavebeensoabsor
bedwi
thmypr
obl
ems,
isRona
outyet?”
“
Yes.
”
“CanIt
ell
yousomethi
ng?Youcanchooset
olist
en
ornott
o,i
t’sok,
att
heendoftheday
,youwil
lhave
todowhati srightfulfory ou.Notev ery onei slucky
tofindl ov e,somepeopl ear est uckwi thmenwho
don’tr espectt hem andhei snotev enaf raidt owal k
away .Somepeopl earest uckwi thmenwhoj ust
don’tcar e.Hei snoti nv estedi nt her elationshi p,
koorei t’sjustsex.Somepeopl ear est uckwi t
hmen
whohav et hewor stsexgame.Youl ov ehi m but
wow! ”Theybot hl aughed.“ Somepeopl ehav et he
bestl ov ebutonedayi talldisappear s.Somepeopl e
havei t,thel ove, t
her espectbutt her elat i
onshi p
keepsget t
ingt estedl eft,r
ightandcent er.No
rel
ationshi pi sper fect,noonei sper fect .Nei t
herar e
youper fectorRona.Themor ey oukeepcount i
ng
eachot her ’
smi stakesandt ryi
ngt ogetbackateach
other, spitti
ngeachot her,themor etimei sl ost.One
dayy ouar egoi ngt owakeupandr ealizet haty ou
wast edy ourt i
me.Thaty oushoul dhav edoneal ot
ofthingsdi fferently.Lov eisnotawal kf il
ledwi th
Rosesandchocol ates.Youwor kt omakei twor k.I
f
youkeepcount ingeachot her ’
smi stakes, youar e
goingt olosei tall.Maker i
ght fuldeci sionswhi ch
makey ouhappy .Thi sbehav i
orofdoi ngwhatpeopl e
expecty out odowi l
lbey ourdownf all.Nowl i
st en
caref
ull
y,i
nthatgr oupt hatIam inwi t
hy ouandEsi,
theti
meRonawentt oj ai
l,youheardwhatEsi sai
d
ri
ght?Heradv i
seisspoton.Buty ouarenotherand
neit
herisRonaMaat la.Becar ef
ul i
nwhichadv i
ce
youtakein.Howi sy ouwal kingawayf r
om theman
youloveoverissueswhi chcanbedi scussedand
fi
xedgoingtohelpy ou?Rememberwhatmmama
wouldsay,don’trun,facei theadonandi fyoufail
,
knowy oufai
ledaf t
ery out ri
ed.”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Yousoundj
ustl
i
keher
.”
Nol
olaughed.“
Iam sur
eyouhav
ehear
dmeaker
e?”
“
Eemma,
keut
ule.(
Yes,
Ihav
ehear
d.)
”
“
Thanky
ou.By
e.”
“
Tel
lmewheny
ougett
oMaun.
”
“Ok.RememberwhatIsai d, andlewenaKenny,
pleasekeepGodi nyourrel
at i
onshi
p,f
rom t
imeto
ti
meagai n,prayforyourr
elati
onshi
p,prayf
orRona,
prayforyourkids,pr
ayforyourfamil
ybutmostofall
,
prayforyourself
.”
“
Eemma.
”
Nol
ochuckl
ed.“
Iam t
ir
ed.By
e.”
”
“
Bye.
”
Kennyhungupt henthoughtful
lyl
ookedatherphone
recal
li
ngwhathadRonasai dhour
sbefore.She
chuckl
edthenwal kedinsi
dethebathr
oom andt ook
ashower,goi
ngwi thhersorepussywouldn’thel
p
herbutshecoul
dn’ twait
.Shewalkedoutmi nut
es
l
aterandchangedbef orewalki
ngoutwit
hhercar
keys.
“
Guy
s,Iam comi
ng.Iam goi
ngt
oseedaddy
.”
Ql
ookedather
.“Daddyi
sback?
”
Shesmil
ed.“Yes.Iam comi
ng.Youwi
l
lseeher
tomor
row.”
Shewal
kedoutandgoti
nhercarcal
l
inghi
m.

*
**

Ronalaughedwit
hLebi
tsoandAtsi
l
ewhilethey
br
aaid.I
nsidet
hehouse,Maat
lawalkedf
rom the
bathroom t
henpausedstar
ingatRona’
sphone
ri
nging.Hewalkedoverandansweredbef
orei
t
couldstop.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Uh…Maat
la?
”
“Yeah,
hey
,hei
sout
side,
Letmegi
vehi
mthe
phone.
”
“
Ohno,
itsok,
youcant
ell
him Iam comi
ng.
”
Maat
lasmi
l
ed.“
Ok,
hewi
l
lber
eady
.”
“
Bye.
”
Shehungupt
henhef r
ownedstar
ingatEsi
’s
messageont
hescreen.Heunl
ockedthephonet
hen
openedt
hemessage.
Esi
:Kennyismyf r
iend, morelikemysi sterand
wordscan’tevenbegi ntoexpl ainhowIf eelabout
whathappened.AndIr egreti
t, i
thappenedoncebut
i
fther
eisany thi
ngIr egret
, i
t’
st hat.I
fyouwantt o
makeyourselffeelbet t
erbylisti
ngourmi st
akes,i
t’
s
okbutdon’tli
stmist akeswemadet ogether.WhatI
knowisthat,t
hatni ghtwewer ebot hdrunk.
Maat
lar
e-r
eadt
hemessaget
henwal
kedout
side
wher
eRonawas.
“
Ronaweh,
whati
sEsi
tal
ki
ngabout
?
Ronatookhisphoneandl
ookedatthemessage,
his
hear
tskippi
ngabeat.Heswal
lowedandl
ookedat
Maatl
a.
“KebualewenaAr ona,whatisEsit
alki
ngabout?
Andbet t
ertal
kfast,
tryl
yingtome,Iwil
lburyy
ou
my sel
f.Whathappenedthatsheisr
egrett
ingt
he
nightt
hatyouwer ebothdrunk?
”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#101

Ronalookedathisbr
otherandlaughedwhi
l
eAt si
l
e
andLebit
sosmiledconfusedatwhatwasgoingon.
Maatl
af r
ownedalsogetti
ngconfused.
“Arey ouseri
ousr i
ghtnow?Doy ouremembert he
ti
meKennyr efusedtoseemewhenshewasi njai
l
?
Your emembert hatQhadbeensi ckattheti
meand
i
twasbad.Esi cameov erwi thyousot ohelpmebut
youhadt ogobackbecauset hekidscouldn’
tsleep
alone.Well,
wegotabi tdrunkandIr eal
lywant edt
o
talktoKenny,wecal l
edthepr isonandliedtothem
say i
ngQhadpassedonsot heywoul dl
etmespeak
toKenny .It
oldy oumont hsaf t
erwhathad
happened.”
At
sil
echuckl
edr
ecal
l
ing.“
Iremembert
hat
.”
Lebit
soshookhi
shead.“
Ist
il
lcan’
tbel
i
eveEsi
was
partoft
hat.
”
Ronasmi
l
ed.“
WhenEsi
wasshout
ingatmebef
ore
youcame, It
oldherthatshewasn’
tsoperfect
becausesheoncev olunt
eeredi
nhurt
ingKenny ,
Kennywasr eal
lyhurt
.IguessEsit
ookitpersonal
andishurtbymesay ingit
.”
Maatl
alaughedhandi
ngthephoneback.“
Don’tt
ell
Kennythat
,kanashewil
lbeangr
yatyoufurt
her
more.
”
Ronagavebackthephonet
oMaatl
aandattendedt
o
hi
smeat.“Del
eteitf
orme.Otl
ankgol
egaEsi.
”
Maat l
anoddeddel et
ingi
t.“
Yes,yonemessageya
tenget r
ickynyana.Onewon’tunder
standt
il
lyou
explai
ny oursel
f.
”
At
sil
elaughed.“
Ioncehadtoexpl
ainwhyIr
ecei
ved
acer
tainmessage,Ial
mostgotdumped.
”
“Bytheway,Kennysay
sshei
scomi
ng.It
hinkwe
shouldbounce.
”
Lebi
tsol
ookedatt
hemeatont
hebr
aai
stand.
“
Whataboutt
his?
”
“
Wewil
ltakei
nmycar
.Goodt
hingIdeci
dedt
obr
ing
t
het
wincab.”
Ronatookapl atefrom theki
tchenanddi
shedthe
meatthatwasr eadyi nt
heplatethent
heyput
ever
ythinginMaatla’scar.At
sil
ewentbackfort
he
beer
sl eavi
ngonlyonesi xpack.
“
Sur
eRona!
”
“
Shar
p.”
MaatlahandedRonahisphonethenjumpedinhi
s
caranddr oveof
f.Ronawal
kedinsi
dethehouseand
puttheplatewit
hthemeatint
hekitchenbef
ore
cal
li
ngEsi .
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Whyonear
thwoul
dyousendt
hatmessaget
ome?
”
“
Iwas-
“
“Neverinyourlifeeverdothat.Iam notgoi
ngto
l
osemybr otherormywomant osuchnonsensethat
happeneddonkeyy earsago.Iwasjustsayi
ngstop
makingy ourselfj
udgeJudywheny ouarenotso
perf
ect.Obat lagont ena,
Maat l
asawt hat
message. ”
“
OhmyGod!Whatdi
dyousay
?”
“Ihadtol
i
ebutnev
eri
nyourl
i
fet
extmeaboutt
hat
night
.”
“
Iam sor
ry,
Iwasj
usthur
t-
“
“
Idon’
tcar
e.Nev
erdoi
tagai
n.”
Hehunganddel et
edthecal
lfr
om hiscal
llog.He
l
ookedaroundthehousethenpushedeveryt
hingi
n
pl
aceandswitchedontheTv.Kennydrovein
outsi
de.Hewalkedovert
othedoorandopenedbut
fr
ownedstari
ngatEma.
“
Hey
…”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Hi.Icoul
dn’
tsl
eepwi
thoutt
alki
ngt
o
you.
”
“
Uh…”
“
CanIcomei
n?”
“
CanIcomet
oyout
omor
rowmor
ningsowecan
t
alk?
”
“
Rona,
Ican’
tsl
eep,
whati
sgoi
ngon?Someonei
n
t
her
e?”
“
Nobut
-“
Kenny’
sRubicondr
ovein,shest
oppedbehi
ndEma’
s
cart
hensteppedoutt
yingherhai
r.
“Iwantt
oparkmycari
nthegar
age,
kekopago
sutel
waho.
”
Emachuckl
ed.“
Issheser
ious?
”
“
Cany oudr
iveoutsoshecandr
ivei
n.Idon’
twantt
o
f
ightwit
hhertoday.
”
“Ar
eyouser
ious?Youaregoi
ngt
oletherj
ust
commandyouliket
hat
?”
“
Please…y
ouknowhowshei
swheni
mpat
ient
.”
“Idon’
tcarehowsheis.Youdon’ thavetodo
everyt
hingshewantsjustbecausesheisy ourbaby
mama.Sheneedst olearnthat.Shecan’tbe
commandi ngyouli
kethisespecial
lyaf
tersending
youtojail
.Youarenotherboyfri
endany more.”
“
Iknowbut
-“
Kennypr
essedt
hehoot
er.
“Iwanttotal
kcalmlywi t
hherwit
houty
ell
i
ngand
gett
ingangry.Letherparkwher
eshewantst
opark
Shejustwantsattenti
on.”
Emasi ghedthenwalkedtohercar
,sheparkedatthe
si
deoft hehousethenRonaopenedt hegaragef
or
Kennywhodr ovein.Shesloweddownr ol
l
ingdown
herwindows.
“Idon’twantt
oseeherorhercarinmyyardever
again.Iam gi
vi
ngyoutenminutestosor
toutyour
affai
rsthencomei
nside.Rautwana?(Doyouhear
me? )”
“
Eemma.
”
Shedrov
einthegaragewhi
l
ehecl
osedi
tthen
si
ghedstar
ingatEmawhowaswalki
ngover
.
“It
hinki
nyoursit
uati
onit’
sbestyousitdownwith
bothofusandexplai
ntoherthatyouhavemov ed
on.Sheisboundtoatt
ackmewi thwordsbutit
’sok.
Aslongassheunderstandswhereshestandsnow
andwhoIam inyourli
fe.”
Ronatookadeepbreat
hstar
ingather
.“It
hinkal
l
thr
eeofusinthesameroom won’
twork.Shewil
l
burndownmyhouse.”
Emalaughedatthej
oke.“Wewill
putoutthefi
re.I
j
ustwanthertounder
standherposi
ti
on.Iwil
lwait
out
sidei
fyout
woneedspace.I
t’
sok.
”
Shewassounderst
andi
nghecoul
dn’tt
hinkofa
bet
terappr
oachhehadtouset
obreakupwithher
.
“Iam real
l
ysorryforallthi
s.IknowIpr omi
sednott
o
hurtyouandIam doi ngjustthat.Ifeelsogui
l
ty
becausehonestlyIreall
yli
kedy oubutnowi tseems
may benot.Youdeser v
emuchbet ter.”
Emalookedathim andsmi l
ed.“Notever
y
rel
ati
onshipi
sperf
ect.Iunderst
andthatthi
ngshave
notbeensail
i
ngperfectl
ybutthat’
showi ti
s.I
twil
l
getbett
er.Noneedtofeelguil
ty.Wewill
beok.”
Rona’
sphonevibr
atedi
nhi
spocket
.Het
ooki
tout
andreadhermessage.
Babe:
5MI
NUTES.
Hesi
ghedput
ti
ngt
hephonebacki
nhi
spocket
.
“Look,Iam goi
ngt obehonestwithy ou.Idon’
twant
tohurtyoufurt
her.Youwereright.Ishouldhave
waitedtooffi
cial
l
yendthingswithKennybef ore
i
nv ol
vingsomeoneelseinthemi x.Ireal
lyli
keyou
butIlovemmagweQ. ”
Emal
ookedathi
mtear
ful
l
y,herhear
tpoundi
ng.
“
Huh?
”
“Il
ovemmagweQandIt
ri
edt
ohat
eherbutIcan’
t.I
don’tknowhowt
o.”
Atearrol
l
eddownEma’scheek.“
Thenwhydidyou
i
nsistonwant
ingmewhenyouknewy our
sel
f?”
“
Iam sorry.Ididn’
tmeant ohurtyou.Ir
eal
l
ythought
wewoul dwor ksomethingoutbecauseyoucaught
myat
t enti
ont hefi
rstdayImety ou.
”
“
Soi
twasonl
ysex?
”
“
No.I
twas…”Hesi
ghed.“
Iam sor
ryEmang.
”
“Youarenot .Youonl ywantedtousemeev enaft
erI
explai
nedtoy ouhowmuchIhav ebeenhur tbefore.
Orisshebl ackmail
ingy ou?Youdon’thav etobe
withhertor ai
seyourkidswi t
hher.Kidswi l
l f
orever
understandwhyt heirparent
sarenott ogether.
.”
“Idon’twantmykidst ounder
standthatwhent hey
haveachancet obeaf ami
lyandtobehonestIj ust
l
ov eKenny.Ilovehersomuch.It’snotev
enabout
thekids,Iwouldsti
l
lloveherwithoutt
hekids.Idon’t
wanttohur
tyouorstr
ingyoualongany morewhenI
knowIwon’tbeabl
etoloveyout hewayy ouneedto
belov
ed.Myhearti
selsewhere,Iam sorr
ybutIcan’
t
hel
phowIfeel.
”
Tear
srol
l
edhercheeks.“
Rona…y
ouar
ehur
ti
ngme.
”
“Idon’twantt okeephurti
ngyout hat’
swhyIam
setti
ngy ouf r
ee.Youwi l
lfi
ndsomeonewho
deservesy oubecauset r
ustme, y
ousobeaut i
ful
.
Youar ev erybeauti
ful
,i
twasy ourbeautyand
beautifulheartt
hatattr
actedmet oy oui
nt hefir
st
place.Youwi llf
indsomeonewhom wi l
ll
ov eyouand
trustme, youwillt
hankmei nthef ut
ureforthi
s.”
“YouonlywantedtousemeRona.Youonl
ywanted
sex,behonestwit
hme.Youdon’
tneedtotel
lme
stupi
dstori
es.Youknowyour
sel
fandyouwanted
someonetof uck.
”
“That’
snottrue.Kennycomingbackshowedmet hat
Isti
lll
oveher.Youy our
sel
fsai
dthis,
shewassick.I
can’thol
dthatagainsther
.Iwanttofi
xthi
ngswit
h
her.
”
Emaputherhandsov
erherf
acecr
yingasherhear
t
br
oke.
“
Whydi
dyoupur
suemewheny
ouknewy
ou…”
Shecri
edevenmor egoi
ngdownonherknees.Rona
sadl
ylookedatherandpul
l
edherup.
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Why
?”
Hecoul dfeelherpai
nthr
oughhercri
esanditmade
hi
mf eelgui
lt
yknowinghewastheonebreakingher
heartaft
erhowshehadbeggedf orhi
m nottohurt
her.
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“Why?Youcameaf terme,
everysi
ngleweek, y
ou
cameafterme…It oldyouwhatIhavebeent hrough
andyouwouldn’tstopRona.Nowy ouarebreaking
myheart.Wasitnecessary?Youcouldhaveleftme
al
one.”
“
Iam sor
ry.Iam r
eal
l
ysor
ry.
”
“
Youar
enotgoi
ngt
obehappywhenIam hur
ti
ng.
”
Shemov
edbacknoddi
ngt
henwal
kedt
ohercar
.
Ronawatchedherasshedr oveof
fthenwalked
i
nsidethehouse.Hel ookedatKennywhowas
eati
ngthemeatwat chingTV.Asmi l
ebright
enedhi
s
faceashedecidedtol ethi
mselff
eelthehappi
ness
ofhavi
nghisgirlsi
tthere.
Shel
ookedathi
m,herey
ebr
owsr
aised.
“
What
?”
“
Shei
sgone.
”
“
Didy
oubr
eakupwi
thher
?”
“
Yes.
”
“Comeandsi
ther
e.”Shepat
tedt
hespacebesi
de
him.
Hewal kedoverandlookedather.Theylookedat
eachsmi l
ingthenheleanedoverandkissedher
soft
ly.
“
Hey
…”
Kennycar
essedhi
scheek.“
Youneedt
oshav
e.”
“Eemma.Il
oveyou.Kekopagogony
ala.(
CanI
pleasemar
ryy
ou?)”
Kennysmi
l
edt
ear
ful
l
y.“
Whatki
ndofapr
oposal
is
that
?”
“
Sit
,Iam comi
ng.
”
Herushedtohi
sbedroom t
hencamebackseconds
l
aterwit
htheri
ng.Heknel
tbef
oreherwhi
leshesat
onthecouch.
“Iboughtthi
sf ory ou.Iboughtitafewday sbefore
youwentf orinternship.Iwasgoingtopr oposebut
thendecidedt ojustgivey outhecarfi
rstthen
proposeafterinternship.Lif
ehappenedbutIkepti t
withmebecauseIknewonedayIwoul dmar ryyou.
Babepleasemar ryme.Iam notper fectbutIwantto
l
ov eyouforther estofy ourli
fe,t
il
ldeathdouspar t
.”
Kennylaughedasat
earr
oll
eddownhercheeks.She
noddedcrying.
“
Yes…”
Heslidtheri
ngonherf i
ngerthenki
ssedher .Kenny
thoughtofhersorepussyashekissedherhar der
breathi
ngheavil
y.Hepickedherupandtookhert o
thebedroom wherehelayheronthebedt akingoff
herclot
hes.Shehelpedhim pul
louthi
st-shirtthen
shecaressedhischestashekissedheragai
n.He
openedherlegsandbur i
edhi
sheadbet weenher
thi
ghsmuf fi
ngher.Kennymoanedsoftl
yast he
soft
nessofhistongueonher.

*
**

Meanwhi l
eEmast oppedcryingatt hesideoft he
roadwonder i
ngwhysheal way slettheuseherand
discar dher
.Wasshet hatmuchofawal kover?She
turnedanddr ovebackt oRona’shouse.Shepar ked
atthesi deoftheroadandst eppedoutwi thher
j
er r
y canful
lwithpet r
ol.Shethought ful
lylookedat
Rona’ scarthenchangedhermi ndandwal kedtothe
door .Hecouldn’tgetawaywi t
husi ngher .She
l
istenedcar ef
ull
yt henslowlyopenedt hedoorand
wal kedin.Shelookedar oundandpausedl ist
eni
ng
tothemoans.
Wit
hdeter
mi nat
ion,shepouredt
hepetr
olall
over
t
hecouchesandt hecurt
ainsandal
soinhiskit
chen
makingatr
ailfr
om thesit
ti
ngroom t
othekit
chen.
Shel ookedatgast ankwithasmi l
ethenopenedi t
.
Shewentt ot hebackdoorandr emov edt hekey s
from thedoort henwal kedtothemai ndoorwher e
allthekey swer e.Shesmiledandwal kedoutl ocking
them i nside.Shet hrewthekeysunder neat hhiscar
befor etakingoutt hemat chesf r
om herpocketand
wal kedt ot heopenwi ndow.Wi thouthesit ati
onshe
l
ight edt hestickmat chesandt hrewitont hecur t
ain
wi t
hpet r ol
.Fireimmedi at
elycaughton.Shequi ckl
y
wal kedt ohercaranddr oveoff.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#102

Kennypausedsni
ff
ingt
hesmokewhi
l
eRonamade
gent
lesl
owl ov
etoher.
“
Rona…doy
ousmel
lthat
?”
Ronasni
ff
edt
heai
ral
sosmel
l
ingi
t.Kennyl
ookedat
hi
m.
“
Wher
eyoucooki
ng?
”
“
No.
”
“
Somet
hingi
sbur
ning.Pl
easegoandcheck.
”
Ronalookedatt
hedoort henfr
ownedlookingatthe
smokecomi ngf
rom underneat
hthedoor.Hequickl
y
gotof
fKennyandputonhi spants.Hewalkedout
andfr
ownedatthefireassmokef i
ll
edthehouse.
“
Fuck!
”
Hetr
iedgoi
ngtot
hesi
tti
ngroom butt
her
ewasf
ir
e
ev
erywher
e,ev
eni
nhiski
tchen.
Kennyf
oll
owednakedt
henf
rozest
ari
ngatt
hef
ir
e.
“
Rona!
”
“
Rel
ax.
..t
her
eisabackdoor
.Putony
ourcl
othes.
”
Kennyr
ushedbackt
otheroom anddressedup
whil
eRonawenttot
hebackdoorbutitwaslocked.
Hewassurehehadseenthekeysonthedoor.He
bumpedint
oKennyonhiswayback.
“
Thedoori
slocked.Wher
eisy
ourphone?
”
Shecoughedatt
hesmoke.“
Int
hesi
tt
ingr
oom.
”
“
Fuck!
”
“
Rona….
”
“
Rel
axbabe…l
etmet
hink.
”

*
**

Outsi
de,neighbor
’swatchedasthehousebur
nt
downwai t
ingforthef
ir
ebr i
gade,al
lst
andi
ngfeet
fr
om ital
l.
“
Gat
wegonal
ebat
homot
eng?
”
“
Eh.
”
“
Eish,
Iwonderwhatcoul
dhav
ehappened.
”
“Maybesomeonei
nsi
destar
tedi
t.Kanapassi
on
ki
ll
i
ngiscommonthisday
s.”
“
Don’
tsayt
hat
.”
“
Youmightbesur
pri
sedt
hatoneoft
hem st
art
edt
he
f
ir
e.”
“
Eish.
”
Ever
yonewatchedfrom adi
stantwhi
l
eot
her
stook
l
if
ev i
deosonfacebook.

*
**

MiafedWaronaheryoghurtwat
chi
ngamoviewit
h
WazhaandQ.Wawasmi l
edathercl
osi
ngherey
es
t
henMi achuckl
ed.
“
Wawa…”
Thebabylaughedthenslowlyclosedhereyesfal
li
ng
asl
eep.Miastoodupandwal kedtoWazha’sroom
wheretheysl
eptthensheputherdown.War ona
cl
osedhereyesfall
ingasleep.Miawalkedoutand
wentbacktothesitt
ingroom.
“
DidKennysayshewoul
dcomeback?
”
Wazhanodded.“
YesbutIam notsur
e.”
“
Ok.
”
Sher eachedforherphoneandr epliedtoher
boyfriendsonWhat sAppbef oregoingonf acebook
andupdat edherprofil
epicture.Shet appeda
facebookv i
deoherf acebookf r
iendwasst reaming
l
iveandl ookedatthehousebur ning.
Sheshookherhead.“WaitseBatswanabat hong,
l
ookatt hi
shouseburningandnoonei shel
ping.
Ebi
letheyaretal
ki
ngabouthowt heycanheart he
scr
eamsf rom i
nsi
deinsteadofdoi ngsomething.
Kanasomeonewi ll
justdiewhi
let heytakevi
deos.”
SheshowedWazhawho’sheartski
ppedasshe
l
ookedatRona’
scarandhouse.
“ThisisRona-
“Shepausedl
ookingathissonthen
stoodupandwal kedt
otheki
tchen.Miafol
lowed
after
.
“
It
’sRona’
shouse.
”
“
What
?”
“
Yoursi
sterwentt
her
e.That
’sRona’
scar
.”
Mi
a’
shear
tst
art
edr
aci
ng.
“
Thi
sRona’
shouse.
”
“
No…”
“
Iswear
.That
’sRona’
shouse.
”
“
Mysi
ster
…”

*
**

Aprilr
elaxedinAtsil
e’
sar msenjoyi
ngt
heneck
ki
ssesshekeptr eceivingwhil
emassagedherbr east
gentl
y.Shecouldf eelhisdi
ckonherbackgrowing
harderwhilehercli
tthrobbed.Themor
eheki ssed
hernecksqueezi
ngherbreast,t
hemoreshegotso
wetandready.Shewasalreadyimagi
ningthatdi
ck
sl
idi
nginherpussy.Shesmiledgladi
nsteadof
conti
nui
ngwiththebraai
,hecamebackhomet oher.
Herphonev i
bratedthenshereachedforit
,hereyes
ontheTV.Sheopenedherwhat sappmessages, a
l
otofmessageswer efl
oodinginthegroupthathad
beencreatedatwork.Sheopenedt hemessages
andreadthroughtil
lshecameacr ossav i
deo.She
pl
ayeditthenreadthemessagesbeneat hit,
her
hear
tpounding.
“
Babe…i
sthi
sRona’
shouse?
”
At
sil
elookedatt
hev
ideo.
“
Fuck!
”
“
Isi
t?”
Hej
umpedof
fthecouchreachi
ngf
orhi
sownphone.
“
Whatt
imedi
dthishappen?”
“
Idon’
tknow,
itseemst
obest
il
lhappeni
ng.
.”
Het
ri
edRona’
snumberbuti
tjustr
ang.
“
Fuck!Iam goi
ngt
oseewhat
’sgoi
ng.
”
“
Iam comi
ngwi
th.
”

*
**

Smokewentupi nt
otheskywhi lepeopleconti
nued
watchingast hefir
edestroyedthehouse.Thef ir
e
enginedrovein.Peoplesighedwi t
hr el
i
efasthef i
re
fi
ghterssteppedoutandst artedtry
ingtocontrolthe
fi
re.Awhi l
elaterAtsi
lesteppedoutofhi scarand
watchedinhor rorashisbrother’
shousewentdown.
“
Aret
her
epeopl
einsi
de?
”
Thenei
ghbor
’snodded.“
Yes.Isawawhi
tecardr
ive
i
n.”
“
ARubi
con?
”
“
Yes.
”
Apr
ilwal
kedov
erandst
oodbesi
deAt
sil
e.
“
Aret
heyi
nsi
de?
”
“
Yes.Fuck!Howdi
dthi
shappen?Ij
ust
…”
“
Theyar
egoi
ngt
obef
inebaby
.”
At
sil
e’
sphoner
angt
hehet
ooki
tout
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Didy
ousee?
”
“Yes,
Iam al
readyathi
shouse.I
t’
sbur
ningdown.
Theyarei
nsi
de.”
“
Shi
t!Iam onmywaywi
thBi
tso.
”
“
It
’snotl
ooki
nggood.Ther
oofi
sonf
ir
eandf
all
i
ng
i
nsidet
hehouse.
”
“
Iam comi
ng.Atl
eastt
heki
dsar
enott
her
e.”
Thef i
refi
ght
ersstart
edcontroll
ingthefir
ewith
pressurewaterastheroofstar
tedfall
ingwhil
e
peoplegasped.Atsi
lewalkedovertothef i
ref
ight
ers.
“
Therearepeopl
einsi
de,mybrotherandhi
swifear
e
i
nsi
de.Theyhavefourki
ds,
can’tanyonegeti
nsi
de?”
Oneofthef i
refighterslookedathi
m.“Rightnowthe
fi
reisaggressiv
e, evenifoneofusgetsinsi
dewith
thi
sentrance,chancesar ethatt
heywon’tcomeout.
Fir
stweshoul datl eastcontr
olt
hefir
ethengetin.
Othersar eatthebackt ryi
ngt obreakdownt hedoor
sowecanuset hebackent rance.Wear edoing
everyt
hi ngwecant rustme, juststepbackandl et’
s
tr
ysav ingy ourbr
otherandhi swi f
e,theyneedal l
our
attent
ionatt hemoment .Youar escared,I
understandbutIneedy outocal m downandl et’
sdo
ourbest .Theambul anceisont heway ,itwil
lbeon
standbyr eadytotakey ourbrotherandhi swif
e.”
At
sil
enoddedandst
eppedback.

*
**

Moesiwalkedinsi
deherhousewatchi
ngthevi
deo,
herkneesgett
ingweak.Seanl
ookedather.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
“
Rona’
shousei
sonf
ir
e.”
“
Rona?
”
“
Maat
la’
sbr
other
.”
“
Shi
t!
”
“
Iam soscar
ed.
”
Sheslowl
ysatdownrecal
li
ngt
hel
astconv
ersat
ion
shehadjusthadwi
thRona.
“
Iam sur
ehei
sfi
ne.
”
Shetookherphoneandcall
edKennybutherphone
wasn’tgoi
ngthr
ough.Shecall
edt
hehousephone.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hi,
Wazha,
letmespeakt
oKenny
.”
“
Shei
satRona’
shouse.
”
“
OhmyGod!
”
“
Hav
eyouhear
dany
thi
ngy
et?
”
“
No,
Ijustsawt
hev
ideo.Letmecal
lyouback.
”
“
Ok.
”
Esi
gotup.“
Iam goi
ngt
her
e.Kennyi
sther
e.Shei
s
i
nsi
dewithhi
m.”
“
Iwi
l
ldr
ive.
”

*
**
Thef
ir
efi
ghterbr
okethedoorandwal
kedi
n
i
mmediat
elymeetingt
hesmoke.
Oneofthem wal kedwithawetbl anketandwentto
thebedrooms.Heopenedt hef i
rstdoorand
i
mmedi atelyspot t
edthemancol lapsedonthefloor
witharoom fil
ledwi t
hsmoke, awett oweloverhis
nose.Heshookhi mthensi ghedst ari
ngathisbig
bodyfi
gur i
nghewoul dn’
tbeabl et opickhi
m.He
l
ookedar oundt heroom thenr ushedoutandcame
backwithacol leagueasthef i
r eenhanced.
Atsil
eputhishandsinhisheadwat
chingt
he
fi
refi
ghter
splacedRonadown.Theparamedics
quickl
ystart
edattendi
ngtohim.At
sil
ewalkedover
tothem.
“
Wher
eishi
swi
fe?Theywer
etoget
her
.”
“
Ther
eissomeoneel
sei
nsi
de?
”
“
Yes.Hi
swi
fe.Shei
sinsi
de.
”
Thefi
refi
ght
ersl
ookedatoneanot
herast
her
oof
fel
li
nsi
dethehouse.
“
Idi
dn’
tseeany
oneexpecthi
m.”
“
Shei
sinsi
de!
”
Maatl
arushedov
ert
henlookedatRonaast
heyput
anoxygenmaskonhi
m andputhim ont
hest
ret
cher
.
“
Wher
eisKenny
?”
“
Sti
l
linsi
de.
”
“
What
?”
Thef
ir
efi
ght
erl
ookedatt
hem.“
Iwi
l
llookf
orher
.”
Somet hi
nginthehousebust
edthatever
yone
steppedback.Anot
herfi
refi
ght
erlookedathi
s
coll
eague.
“
Goingbackinsidewi
l
lbesui
cidenowMotheo.The
f
ir
eisadvancingtoof
ast
.Youwill
diei
nther
e.”
Maatlaangri
lylookedatt hem.“
Ifyoucan’tdoyour
j
ob,takeoffthatunifor
m andletusdoi t
.Someone
i
sinsidether
e,shei sgoingtodiebecausey ouf
ail
ed
t
odoy ourj
obs!”
Mot
heor
ushedbackt
othebackdoor
.
*
**

Emawat chedthev ideoeat i

ngheri cecr eam witha
smi l
e.Itseemedonl yRonawasout .Shesi ghedthen
tur
nedherat t
enti
onbackt ot heTVwat chingher
show.Bynowshewaspr obablydeadf r
om t he
smokei nhalati
on.Ronawoul dunder st
andhowi tfel
t
beinghear tbr
oken.Shedi dn’
tev engui l
ty,notinthe
sli
ghtestmanner ,notaf t
erhowhehadt reatedher,
hedeser vedeverythinghappeni ngt ohim.May be
aft
ert hi
shewoul dnev erplayany oneagai n.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#103

Esisteppedoutofthecarandrushedpastthecrowd
thatwaswatching.Shelookedatthehousestandi
ng
befor
eMaat l
a.
“
Aret
heyout
?”
“
Kennyi
sinsi
de.
”
Esi
tear
ful
l
yshookherhead.“
No…”
“Theyhavet
akenRonatothehospi
tal
,thi
sot
her
ambulancei
sforKenny
.”
Seanwal
kedov
erandhuggedEsi
whowasbr
eaki
ng
down.
“
Don’
tpani
c.”
Maat
lal
ookedatSeant hencl
i
ckedhistongue
movi
ngfrom t
hem andstoodwithAtsi
l
eandBitso.
Maat
la’
sphonerangthenhepicked.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,ar
etheyout
.Iam wat
chi
ngt
hef
acebookl
i
ve.
”
“Kennyisi
nside.I
fy ouhavesomet
hingnast
ytosay
,
keepittoyoursel
f.Iam noti
nthemoodforyour
nonsense.
”
“Iam checki
ngupont hem.IknowIhav ebeen
soundingbit
terl
atel
y,Idi
dn’
tevenreal
izeit
.Ke
i
kgalemetsibabe.Ihopeshewalksoutofthisal
i
ve.I
will
keepherinmypr ayer
s.”
“
Shar
p.”
Hehungupandsi
ghedwhi
l
eAt
sil
elookedathi
m.
“
Ronadi
dtel
lyouaboutt
hisgi
rl
.”
Maatlal
ookedathim, Atsi
l
ekeptqui etl
ookingback
atthehouse,t
heirheart
sskippedast hefir
efi
ght
er
walkedoverwithKennyinhisarms.Thepar amedics
tookherandplacedheront hestr
etcher.Theyal
l
walkedoverbuttheparamedicsplacedherinthe
ambulancethentheambul ancedroveoff.
Theyallr
ushedtothei
rcar
sandf ol
lowedaf
tert
he
ambulanceheadedtothehospi
tal
.
*
**

Mi
aputonhershoesasWazhal
ookedather
.
“
Myf
ri
endi
sher
e,Iwi
l
lgot
othehospi
tal
.”
“
Ok.Cal
lmewheny
ougett
her
e.”
“
Ok.
”
Mi
arushedoutpi
cki
ngVi
ctor
’scal
l
.
“
Hey
…”
“
Hey,Kennyisi
nhospi
tal
,Iam onmywayt
her
e.I
wi
ll
callyou.
”
“
Ok,
keepmeupdat
ed.
”
Shehungupasherboy
fri
enddr
oveof
f.
“
Shei
sgoi
ngt
obef
ine.
”
Shenoddedworr
iedly.Herboyf
ri
endspedt
othe
hospi
tal
.Awhi
lelaterheparkedhi
scar.
“
Youcanwai
ther
e.Rr
agweQ’
sbr
other
sar
ether
e.”
“
Ok.
”
Shekissedhim andsteppedoutthenrushedi
nside.
Shewal kedovertoAsti
lewhowasst andi
ngwi t
hhis
gi
rl
fr
iend, Bi
tso,
MaatlathenEsiandherboyfr
iend.
“
Any
thi
ngy
et?
”
Esil
ookedandshookherhead.Herey esfel
lon
Mia’
shotpantsthatshowedhert hi
ghsandlegs.Her
eyeswenttothatt
ankt opthatshowedsomef l
esh
ofherbreastt
hensighed.
“
Aren’
tyoucol
dthough?
”
“
No.Iam f
ine.
”
Shelookedatthemenast heytr
iedkeepi
ngt hei
r
eyesoffhert
hougheveryonecouldnoti
ce.Esitook
Mia’
shandandt ookheraside.
“Hey…Kenny,
isgoi
ngt
obefi
ne.Iknowyoumust
havelef
thomeinahur
ry,
whodi
dy oucomewi
th?A
taxi
?”
“
No.Af
ri
enddr
oppedmeof
f.
”
Shenodded.“
Ok.Yourshor
tsar
etooshor
t,ev
ery
one
i
sstar
ingatyou.
”
Mi
alookeddownonhershor
ts,
“
What
?”
“Therearemenher eandy ouaretooy oungtobe
dressingli
kethi
s.Menwi llhavedi
rt
yt hought
swhen
theylookatyou.Iwil
lremai nher
e,youcangohome
andputonsomet hi
ngmor eappropriate.Iwi
l
l
updatey ouontheprogress.”
Mialookedatherandsighed.“Youar ewayolder
thanmeandIr especty
ouropi nionbutIam not
goingtogoleavi
ngmysi steralone.I
ftheyaregoi
ng
tolookatme,lett
hem look.Ihav enoprobl
em wit
h
howIam dressed.”
Miawal
kedbackandsatdownont
hebenchwai
ti
ng
t
ohearfr
om t
hedoctor
.

*
**

Thedoct
orf
ini
shedat
tendi
ngt
oRonat
hensmi
l
ed.
“
Youaregoi
ngt
obef
ine.Thewett
owel
wor
kedi
n
y
ourf
avor.
”
Ronat
ookof
fthemask.“
Wher
eismywi
fe?Shewas
wi
thme?
”
“Sheisherebei
ngattendedto.Don’
twor
ry.Shei
sin
safehands.Asfory
ou, keeptheoxy
genmaskon,
youaregoingtobefi
ne. ”
Hewalkedout,
Ronaputbackt hemasktr
yingt
o
thi
nkofanypossi
bleexplanat
ionbuthecameback
tooneexpl
anati
onandheknewt hatwasit
.His
brot
her
swalkedinminuteslater.
Atsi
lesi
ghedwit
hrel
i
efst
ari
ngathi
m.“
Youscar
ed
theshi
tofus.
”
Ronat
ookof
ftheoxy
genmask.“
Howi
sKenny
?”
“
Thedoct
orsar
ewi
thher
.”
“
ItwasEma.
”
Maat
laf
rowned.“
What
?”
“I
twasher.Ican’tt
hinkofany
onebuther.ShesaidI
am notgoi
ngt obehappywhilesheisi
npainor
somethi
nglikethat
.Sheisgoingtopayfort
his.
”
At
sil
eshookhi
shead.“
Lett
hepol
i
cedeal
wit
hher
.”
“
All
evi
dencehav
ebeenbur
ntdown.Ot
sil
egony
ela.
Shei
sgoi
ngt
oregr
ett
his.
”
“
Youwi
l
lgot
ojai
landt
hist
imef
oral
ongt
ime.
”
“
Wat
lwael
a.Ot
sil
egol
ela.
”
“Nyaaenewat l
wael
a,Iwasgoi
ngtodef
endherbut
i
fshereall
ystart
edt
hefir
ethenIhav
enothi
ngto
sayinherfav
or.“
Atsi
lel
ookedatMaatla.“
Areyouseri
ousl
y
encour
agingt
hisnonsenseri
ghtnow?Hewil
lgot
o
j
ail!
”
“Nooneisencouragi
ngany
thing.Youwoulddothe
sameifyouwereinRona’
splace.Watlwael
a.Kenny
mightbedeadforall
weknowbecauseofher .
”

*
**

Esi
stoodupasadoct
orwal
kedov
er.
“
Issheok?
”
“Sheinhal
edalotofsmoke.Si
mplyshedidn’thav
e
enoughoxygenandhadmor ecar
bondioxideinher
bloodstream.Wehav eputherundertheventi
l
ator,
i
tsgoi ngtoblowairintoherl
ungsandcar r
ycarbon
dioxideoutofherlungs.Wearestillr
unni
ngmor e
testsandwewi llkeepherundercloseobserv
ation
andmoni torherconditi
on.
”
Mi
ast
oodup.“
Butwi
l
lshebef
ine?
”
“Hopef
ull
yyes.Shei
nhal
edqui
teanamountof
smoke.”
“
Canweseeher
?”
“
Onlyfami
l
yatt
hismoment
.Andoneper
sonata
t
ime.”
“
Iam hersi
ster
!”
“
Ok,
fol
l
owme.
”
Miawalkedbehi
ndthedoct
orasEsi
sighed.Sean
ki
ssedherfor
ehead.
“
Shewi
l
lbef
ine.
”
“
Yeah…”

*
**
Latert
hatev
eni
ng,
Mot
husi
spoket
oMot
heoont
he
phone.
“
Issheok?
”
“
Iam notsur
e.Shei
satt
hehospi
tal
.”
“
Wasshebur
nt?
”
“Nah.Justinhal
edal otofsmoke.Shewas
unconscious.Shehadbeent hereforawhi
l
e.She
mightnotmakei t.Iam notsure.
”
“
Don’
tsayt
hat
.Shehasbeent
hroughenough.
”
“
Ijustt
houghtIshoul
dtel
lyou.
”
“
Thanks.
”
“
Howi
sNana?
”
“Shei
sfi
ne.Sheisbackf
rom Thai
l
and.Iwantt
o
cometoGaborone.
”
“
Why
?BecauseofKenny
?”
“
Iam r
eal
l
ywor
ri
edabouther
.”
“
Kennyhasherhusbandt
owor
ryabouther
.”
“
Youdon’
tunder
stand.
”
“Pl
easedon’
ttel
lmeyousti
ll
lov
ehert
hismuch
evenaft
ersomanyyear
s!”
“
It
’snotl
i
ket
hat
.Icar
eabouther
.Il
ovemywi
febut
-
“
“Thensti
cktoy ourwi
fe.Kenny’
snewf
ami
l
yiswi
th
her.Herhusband’sbr
other
s.”
“
Kennyi
snotmar
ri
ed.
”
“
Buty
ouar
e.”
Mot
husi
sighed.“
Wewi
l
ltal
k.”
“
Sur
e.Don’
tcomet
oGabor
one.Kennywi
l
lbef
ine.
”
“
Thanks.
”
Hehungupandwal kedoutoft
hebathroom.
Worr
iedly,
heputdownhisphoneandjoinedNanao
i
nbedt houghunabl
etosl
eep.

*
**
Namet
sost
oodupasMaat
lawal
kedi
nthehouse.
“
Hey
,howar
ethey
?”
“Ronaisfi
ne,t
hedoctorssaytheywil
lkeephim on
theoxygenmaskti
llt
omor row.Kennyhasbeen
placedundert
hevent
ilat
ionmachine.Theysai
dshe
i
nhaledalotofsmoke.”
“
Theywi
l
lbef
ine.
”
“
Yah.
”
“
Canwet
alk?
”
“
Namet
so,
Iam t
ir
ed,
Iwantt
osl
eep.
”
“
Idon’
twantust
osl
eepl
i
ket
his.Youar
eangr
y.”
“
Iam notangr
y,j
ustdoubt
ful
.”
Hewal
kedt
othebedr
oom.Namet
sowentaf
terhi
m.
Shetouchedhisdick.“DaddyIam sorry.Ihave
repr
imandedmy self
.Iheardy ou.Youwer eri
ght.I
t
won’thappenagain.Youarest r
essed.Letmet ake
youmi ndofi
tsoy oucansl eepproperl
y.”
Shetooki
toutandgav
ehim ahandj
ob.Maat
la
grunt
edenj
oyi
nghergri
p.
*
**

Thefoll
owingmor ni
ng,Emaf i
nishedprepari
ngfor
workthentookhercarkeyshummi ngandopened
herdoor.Ronapushedherinthatshef el
lonherbutt
whil
ehewal kedinsi
deherhouset henlockedthe
door.Shelookedathim,herheartpounding.
Hepull
edherupwit
hherhai
randl
ookedather
cei
l
ingthenl
ookedather
.
“Iam goingtohangy outoy ourr oof.Unl
ikey ou,I
makesur ethatmyv i
cti
msar er eall
ydead.It’
sgoi ng
tolookli
kesuicide,noonewi l
l suspectany t
hi ng
becauseaf t
erall
,youhav eyourowni ssues.Your
sist
erwillt
hinkit’
stheheartbr eakandy oudeci ded
toendy ourownl i
fe.Youwillturnintoasoci al medi
a
hashtagandy ourli
fewillbeov er…justli
kethat .”
Tear
sfi
l
ledherey
esashel
ookedi
nhercol
dey
es.
“Now,
youcangoaheadandtellmewhathappened
orIwi
llj
ustki
l
lyou.Li
etome,Iam ki
l
li
ngyou.Star
t
f
rom t
het
imey
oucameback.
”
Shelookedathim,
herhear
tpoundi
ngashet
ookout
aropefrom hi
ssmall
bag.
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“Isai
dstar
tfr
om t
het
imey
oucamebackf
rom my
house.”
Rona’
sphonerangfr
om hi
spocket
.Het
ooki
tout
andpi
ckedAtsi
le’
scal
l.
“
Yah?
”
“
Rona,i
t’
sKenny.Comeback,
somet
hinghappened.
Wher
eareyou?”
Emat r
iedtor
un,Ronadr oppedhisphoneand
tr
ippedherwit
hhisleg.Emaf el
lwit
hascream t
hen
Ronalookedather
.
“
Yout
hinky
ouar
esmar
t?”
“Iam sorr
y.Iwil
lnev
erdoi
tagai
n.Iwi
l
lmov
efar
away.Pleaseletmego.
”
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#104

Tearsr oll
eddownhercheeks.“ Iam sor ry.Iam sor r
y,
Iwasr eal l
yhur t.Youbr okemyhear t.Iaskedy ou
countlesst imest oleav emeal one, Ikeptt el
li
ngy ou
toleavemeal onebuty ounev erlistened.Ifitwasf or
sex,youshoul dhav ejustsai dt hat.Youdi dn’tneed
tohurtme.TousemebecauseKennywasnott here
totakecar eofy ou.Howdoy out hi
nkIf eel?How
shouldIf eel Arona?Pl easet ellmehowIshoul dfeel
aft
erbei ngused, beingl i
edt o,beingsomeone’ s
dustbinf orhissemenonl ytobet oldIwasj ust…just
somet hingl yingar oundt hatcouldbeused.Iasked
youtochoosebecauseIhav ebeenhur tbef ore…not
once,nott wi ce…count esst imes…y oucamet omy
house!Idi dn’tf orcey out ocomet omyhouse!You
cameony ourownandr ememberwhaty ousai d…
yousai dy ouandKennygoti naf i
ghtandnowal lyou
wantisaf reshst art
.Iwai t
edt hreemont hs…i gnored
all
thehat eIwasr eceiving…Ii gnoredt hewor ds
dir
ectedatmebecauseIl i
ket othinkIhav ethick
skin…t hatIcanwi thstandi t
…butdoy ouknowhow
i
tf eelstobecal l
edagor il
la?Youdon’ tbutIkept
quiet.IkeptquietbecauseIbel ievedyouhadmade
yourchoi ce.Doy ouknowst upidIf eelAr
ona?I
alway stoldmy selfIwoul djustwal kawaybutIl ove
you.Howdoesi tmakey ouf eelknowingy ouhav e
thatpowert oj
ustbr eakmel ikethat?Goaheadand
kil
l me…y oumightaswel lbecauseIwi ll
pr obabl
ydo
i
tonmyown.Don’ twor ry,Iwillevenwrit
et he
suicidallett
er.
”
Ronalookedatherandputhi
shandsi
nhi
shead.
“Youcouldhav
ekill
edsomeoneEma.”
Shebr
okedowncry
ing.“
Iwasn’
tthi
nki
ng.Ij
ust
want
edtohur
tyouback.
”
“
Ok…y ouhavebur
ntdownmyhouseandev er
ythi
ng
i
nsi
de.Kennyisi
nhospi
tal
fight
ingf
orherl
i
fe.Are
weequalnow?”
“
Iam sorr
y.That
’snotwhoIam.Iwi
shy
ouknew
whoIreal
lyam.Thatisnotme.
”
Feel
ingguil
ty,
hehel
pedherupandhuggedher
.“I
am sorr
y.”
Shecri
edi
nhisar
msforawhil
ethenf
inal
l
yst
epped
backandwi
pedawayhert
ear
s.
“Iam sor
ry.Iam r
eall
ysor
ry.Iwi
shIgobacki
nti
me
andIswearIwoul dhavel
i
stenedtoyou.
”
Shesni
ff
edt
henhesmi
l
ed.
“Thatwasnumberonmemmeot l
i
legoswaba
becausei
nsur
anceisj
ustgoi
ngt
opayme.”
Shelookedathi
m andl
aughedtear
full
y.“
Iam hur
t
youdidn’
tcomeoutwit
hatleastabl
ister
.”
Hechuckled.“Thefirestar
tedinthesi
tt
ingr
oom
comingtothebedr ooms, mybedroom i
sthefur
thest
ofthem al
l,
itsti
llwasn’tonfir
ejustt
hesmoke.Idid
thewettowelthing,neverknewitcoul
dwork.
”
“
Itdoes,br
eathi
nginthr
oughawett
owel
prot
ect
s
y
ourlungs.Iam r
eall
ysorr
y.”
“I
t’
sok, y
ouar enotsor
ry,y
ouknowit .Youareevil
.
Kotengyouarewonderingwhywear en’tdead.You
aregoingtohell
.Thedayyouenterthroughthehell
gates,
lesatanatotaotl
aemel el
aar
el amonna
akerengwanawame!( eventhedevi
lwi l
lst
andup
andsayy
ouseemychi
l
d!)
”
Emal
aughed.“
Iam notgoi
ngt
ohel
l
.”
“
Youar
e.Ebi
l
ether
eisaspeci
alpl
acef
ory
out
her
e.”
“
Whoel
sehav
eyouki
l
led?Yousai
d-“
“
Ngng,
Iam goi
ng.Wenaobat
lagonkol
ega.
”
Hepickedhi
sropeandthrewi
tinhi
sbagwhi
l
eshe
wat
chedhim ashebreat
hedfast
.
“Youshouldn’
ttr
iggeryourcondi tion,st
ayawayf
rom
smokei nthemeantimetillyour ecoverbuti
naday
ortwoy ouwil
lbefineunlesstheymi ssedsomet
hing.
Ifyoukeepbreat
hingli
ket hat,gobackt ot
he
hospit
alsotheycanattendt oy ou.”
“
Thanks.
”
“
War
eKennyl
eenedoesn’
thav
easi
ngl
ebl
i
ster
?”
Ronachuckled.“
Shehasacoupl
ebutit
’snotthat
ser
ious.Thedoctorsai
dshewi
ll
recov
erwell.
”
“
That
’sal
l
?”
“
Mol
oio!(
Thi
swi
tch!
)”
Emalaughed.“Iam aski
ngfrom t
hegoodnessofmy
hear
t.Whatdidthedoctorsay?Iwantt
ohelp?”
“
Aft
ery
out
ri
edt
oki
l
lus?
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Iam nott
hatev
il
.”
“Hesaidshehasacuterespi
rat
oryfai
l
urebutt
he
oxygenther
apytheyputheri
nwi l
lhel
pandsome
medicati
ons.
”
Shenodded.“
Shewi
l
lbef
ine.
”
“
Yeah.Nomor
eat
tacksr
ight
?”
Shenodded.“
Nomor
e.”
“
Bye.
”
Hepickedhi
sphoneandwal
kedout
.Emaputher
handsonherandsi
ghed.

Backatt
hehospi
tal
,Ronal
ookedatAt
sil
e.
“
Whathappenedt
oKenny
?”
“Not
hing.Wherewerey
ou?Ihopeyoudi
dn’
tdo
anyt
hing,t
rustme,
youwon’
tgetawaywit
hit
becausey
oudi
dthef
ir
stt
ime.
”
“
Arey
ouser
iousr
ightnow?
”
“Iam mor
ethanser
ious.I
magi
negoi
ngt
ojai
lfor
her.
”
“
Idi
dn’
tdoany
thi
ngt
oher
.”
At
sil
esi
ghedwi
thr
eli
ef.“
Ok…”
At
sil
e’
sphoner
angt
henhepi
cked.
“
Babe…”
“
Hey
,di
dyougett
heeggs?
”
“
Yeah,
Iam comi
ng.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Iam goi
ng.
”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evey
ouhadmepani
cki
ngl
i
ket
hat
.”
“
Sor
ry.
”
At
sil
ewal
kedawayanswer
inganot
hercal
l
.
“
Yeah?
”
“
Hey
,it
’sBoi
neel
o.Canwemeetandt
alk?
”
“
Idon’
tent
ert
ainexes.
”
Shelaughed.“
Whosai
dyouareent
ert
aini
ngme?I
sai
dcanwemeetandt al
k.”
“
No.
”
“
Otshabaenegir
lf
ri
endy
agago?(
Youar
escar
edof
y
ourgir
lf
ri
end?
)”
“
Aren’
tyoumar
ri
ed?
”
“Ij
ustwantustomeetandtalk.Thingsendedona
badnote,Iwantust
ojustt
alk.AlsoIwanttogiv
e
yousomet hi
ng.
”
“Idon’twantany
thi
ngandcoul
dyoupleasestop
call
ingme?Iam notint
hemoodforthisshi
t.
”
Hehungupanddr
ovehome.

*
**

Qwalkedoutofhi
smother
’sbedr
oom wi
thaf
rown
andl
ookedatWazha.
“
Aunt
y,wher
eismama?
”
Wazhal
ookedathi
m.“
Shei
sst
il
lnotbackmybut
shei
scoming.
”
“
Shei
swi
thdaddy
?”
“
Yes.Shei
swi
thdaddy
.”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Ok!
”
Acardr
oveinoutsi
de,
Wazhaopenedt
hedoorand
l
ookedatEsist
eppi
ngout
.
“
Hey
…”
“
Hi.Howi
sshe?
”
“Shei
sstabl
e.Shewil
lbefi
ne.Howar
etheki
ds?I
cametocheckonthekids.
”
“
Theyar
efi
ne.Idi
dn’
ttel
lQ.
”
“
Ok.
”
Esi
wal
kedinsi
dethehouseandlookedatQwho
waspl
aci
ngLaronaonthecouch.
“
HeyQ…”
“
Aunt
y..
”
Esi
lookedar
ound.“
Wher
eisMi
a?”
“
Shewentoutwi
thherf
ri
end.
”
“Ij
ustwantedtocheckont
heki
ds,
incasey
ouneed
anythi
ng,
tell
me.”
“
Ok.
”
Esiwal
kedoutthenpausedst
aringatMaat
la’
sot
her
car
.Ronasteppedoutandwalkedover
.
“
Hi…”
“
Ithoughty
ouhaddi
ed.
”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Youwantmedead?
”
“
Mxm.
.”
Ronal
ookedatt
hehouset
henbackatEsi
.
“
Let
’st
alki
nthecar
.”
Theygoti
nhercart
henhel
ookedather
.
“Iam sor
ryIwasr udeyester
day.Youwereri
ght
.I
messedup, Ishouldhaveneverl
aidmyhandson
Kenny.Shedoesdeser vebett
erandIam goi
ngto
i
mpr ovemyself.I
twill
neverhappenagai
n.”
Esi
noddedwi
thasmi
l
e.“
Iam gl
adIwasr
ight
.”
“
Youareal
waysr
ight
.Andi
twasal
owbl
owt
o
ment
iont
hat.
”
“
Itwas.Ihadev
enf
orgot
ten.
”
“
Omaaka.(
Youar
ely
ing.
)”
“No.Ireall
ydidbecausewepr omisedwewoul d
neverspeakaboutit.Iwasjustsurpri
sedwhenyou
sai
dity etyouwerethefi
rstonetor egreti
t.
”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
Shesmiledst
ari
ngathimt
henl
eanedov
erandput
herhandonhischest
.
“
ButnowthatIremember
,Ican’
tseem t
ost
op
t
hinki
ngabouti
t.”
Hel
aughedpushi
ngherhandsof
f.“
Wat
senwa.
”
Sherubbedhisdickwit
hasmi l
ethenunzippedhis
pant
sandt ookitout
.Shit
!Sheswall
owedst ar
ingat
i
tashercli
tthrobbedbutRonapushedoffherhand
l
aughingandputbackhisdicki
nhispants.
“
Stopi
t!Il
ovemywomanv
erymuchandnot
hingi
s
goi
ngt
omakemecheat
.Notev
eny
ou.
”
Sher
oll
edherey
es.“
Iwasj
ustt
est
ingy
ou.
”
Hel
ookedatherwi
thasl
i
ghtf
rown.“
Wer
eyou?
”
Esil
aughed.“
Iam atahappyplace.AndKennyi
smy
bestf
ri
end,Iwoul
dneverbetr
ayherl i
ket
hatagai
n.”
Hesmil
ed.“
Ipassedt
het
estdi
dn’
tI?Iam gl
adwe
cl
ear
edthi
ngsup.”
“
Met
oo.By
e!Seani
swai
ti
ngf
orme.
”
“
Cool
.”
Hesteppedoutandwal
kedinsi
det
hehouse.Esi
cl
osedhereyesandl
aughed.
“
Godwhatam Idoi
ng?
!Thi
sisnotme.
”

*
**

Ronal
aughedcar
ryi
ngbot
hQandLar
ona.
“
Imi
ssedy
out
oo.
”
Heputt
hem downwi
thasmi
l
e.
“
Wher
eismama?
”
“
Ther
ewasal
i
ttl
eacci
denty
est
erday
.”
“
What
?”
“
Ourhousebur
ntdown.
”
“
No!
”
“Yeah,mamaandIwer estuckinsi
de.Shei satthe
hospit
albecauseshebr eat
hedinal otofsmokebut
sheisgoingtobef i
ne.Thegoodt hingisthatnow
wear egoingtobestayi
ngher etogetherbecause
daddydoesn’thaveahouseany mor e.”
Qsmi
l
ed.“
That
’sawesome!
”
“
Yeah,andmommyanddaddyar
egoi
ngt
oget
marr
ied.
”
“
Yey
!!
”
Wazhasmil
edandwal
kedoutEsiwasrev
ersed.She
wavedf
orhert
ostopt
henwenttoEsi’
swindow.
“
HeyWazha.Ev
ery
thi
ngok?
”
“
Isawwhatyoudi
d,Iwaswatchingbythewi
ndow.
I
kgal
emel
e,(
repr
imandyour
self
,)don’
tthi
nkyouar
e
goingtobeawi t
chandIwi l
ljustwat chy oudest roy
afami l
ywhichGodPutt ogether .Ineverexpect ed
thi
sf r
om you,Iam v erydi
sappoi ntedandhur tthat
outofallpeople,youwoul ddot his.Thisj ustshows
thatyoucannev ertrustanyone.Kennyl ooksaty ou
l
ikeabi gsi
ster.Iam goingt otalkwi t
hRona, heis
l
ikeasont ome.Ket l
i
legomokgal emela( Iam
goingtorepri
mandhi m)butl etmeseey ou
anywherenearhi m everagain,Iwi l
ltel
lKennywasa
venomoussnakey ou, f
ullofpretense.Yousmi le
whiledeepdowny ouhav eev i
lintenti
ons.ket sogi l
e
l
et sogo!Si
es!”
Wazhatur
nedbackandwal
kedinsi
dethehouse
bumpi
ngintoRonawhowasstandi
ngbythedoor.
Shel
ookedathim.
“Ify
ouhav eeverdi
sappoi
ntedmebefor
e,t
odayy
ou
real
lydid.Iwon’tsaymuch,keswabi
l
egore,
i
kgalemel e.St
opbeingyourownenemyof
progress.
”

FEW WEEKSLATER…
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#105

AFewWeeksLat
er.
..

AtmmagweTumo’ shouse,Kennysmil
edholdi
ng
herbabyasMiadi
dhermake-upearlyi
nthemorning.
MmagweTumowal kedinandsmi l
edstar
ingat
Kenny.Shet
ookSaronaf
rom herandsmil
edmor e.
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ulmygi
rl
.”
Kennylookedatthemi r
rorwi
thasmi
l
e.Mi
amov
ed
backadmiringhersi
ster’
sbeaut
y.
“
WhentheMotsamai
’sarr
ive,
theyar
egoi
ngt
oknow
l
ooset
hei
rbr
eathsyetagai
n.”
MmagweTumosmi l
ed.“Theyar e,mostofthem
di
dn’treal
l
yknowherbecauset helastt
imet hi
s
happenedKennywasn’
tthere.Thisti
mear oundshe
i
sher e.
”
Mi
asi
ghed.“
Mmewhyar
etheybei
ngchar
gedagai
n
whent
heyoncepai
dhermagadi
?”
“Akeretheycameher etocanceltheunion.Kenny
wasasgoodassi ngleaft
erthatandtheyneedt o
paymagadi forher.Gaperebabakisetsagot oka
maitseo.Theywerev er
yrudeespecial
lyRona’s
mot herthet
imetheycamet ocancel.”
Kenny
’sphonerang,
shet
ooki
tandpi
ckedRona’
s
cal
lwit
hasmi l
e.
“
MmaMot
samai
…”
Ever
yonei
nther
oom l
ookedather
.Sheshy
lyl
ooked
downtal
ki
ngsof
tl
y.“
Hi…”
“
Ican’
twai
ttoseey
ou.
”
“
Met
oo.
”
“
Didy
out
akey
ourmedi
cat
ion?
”
“
Yes.
”
“Il
oveyou,t
hisi
syetanotherhappi
estdayofmyl i
fe.
Keipot
sagorekatsat
silalenyal
oketlebekelekae
tot
a.Nkarenkakwal
athebestt i
meofmyl if
eko
pri
maryelecomposi
ti
on.”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Ial
readyf
eel
li
key
ourwi
fe.
”
“
Wifey
aeng?Hest
il
lhasn’
tpai
dmagadi
.Le
t
shamekel
amobat
honglonaij
a!”
Kennyl
aughedasmmagweTumi
wal
kedout
.
“
Babewehgat
weIam noty
ourwi
fey
et.
”
“Youshoul
dtel
lherhowwefuck,
gonweot
la
dumelagorewenaomosadi
wame. ”
Shel
aughed.“
Osi
mol
otse.
”
“Ican’
twai
ttofuckyouweari
ngmyri
ng,
babewhy
can’twej
usthaveadoubleweddi
ngl
eAtsi
l
e?I
heardApri
lwassuggest
ingi
t.
”
“Ngng, nnaIwantt oenj
oymydaywi thoutanyone
i
nt er
feri
ng.Iwanttobet heonlyonebeinggiven
attenti
onthatday.Apri
lshouldjustenj
oyherday
aloneandIwi l
lenjoyminealone.”
“
Ok.Wewi
l
ljusthav
eourweddi
ngaf
terhi
s.”
KennylookedasKefi
lewalkedin.“
Babe,
letme
handl
esomet hi
ng.Il
oveyou.”
“
Ilov
eyoumor
e.”
Kef
ilookedather
.“Soyouar
eget
ti
ngmarri
edagai
n?
Iwonderhowmanyt i
mesyouar
eyetgoi
ngtoget
marr
ied.”
Kennysi
ghedasshelookedatherdrunkmother
hol
dingabot
tl
eofblacklabel
inherhands.
Miast
oodupandpushedherout
.“Mamakekopao
t
samaye,
wankgahela.Goandbath.
”
Miawal
kedbacki
nsecondsl
aterandcl
osedt
he
door
.
“
Iwantt
oshowy
ousomet
hing.
”
Miashowedherafacebookpost
.Kennyt
ookt
he
phoneandreadt
hrough.

‘
Manyy ounggi rl
shav ebeenbul l
iedfort heirskin
growingupj ustbecauset heywerenotabi tlighter
butjustdar k.Iwasoneoft hem .Igr ewuphat ing
my selfbecauseIbel ievedIwasugl y.Tot aIwoul d
scrubmy selfsomuchker egonwemyski nwi ll
changeandIwi l
lbecomel i
ghtskinned.Iwasbul lied
forjustbeingdar k,darkerthantheot herblackchi ld
besideme.Iwasshamedbecauseofmyski n,fr
om
primar yt oJuni orschool ,insecondar yschool t
hat’s
whenIbumpedi nt oaphot oint hemagazi ne.Isaw
LupitaNy ongo .Dar kandpr oudinherski n.Ihad
herpi cturesal lov ermyr oom bat hong, mymot her
call
edmyr oom Lupi t
a’s butIhadnot r
oubl e
becauseev er yt i
meIl ookedather ,Ifeltsoconf ident.
Tertiaryschool t
heyst i
llbul l
iedmebutt henI
pretendednott ohear ,heldmyheadr aiseduphi gh
anddi dmyt hi ng.Il eantt hatbei ngdar kski nnedi s
notabadt hi ng, myski nisbeaut i
ful,
itsay sAf ri
can
queen.Myski ni snotacur se, i
t’
sapr i
vil
ege.Myski n
i
sgol d.Myski ni slifeandIam pr oudoft hewayI
am.Il earntt ol ovemyski n, can’tfindsui table
foundat ionf ory ou?Hunnyr ockt hatnat ural ski
nl i
ke
aqueeny ouar e.Nowr el
at i
onshi pwi se,ithadnev er
beeneasy .Bat hongkanannaIbel ievedgor ethe
reasonmyr elat i
onshi psdi dn’ twor kouti sbecauseI
wasdar k .Ev eryrelat i
onshi pal way sendedone
wayort heot her .Myl astr elationshipkanaker e
sit
uat ionshi p t aughtmesomet hing.Thi sman
pursuedmef ormont hs,hewoul dcomewher eI
wor kev eryweekakopamar atomogonna.Het old
meabouthi sexandIwasr eluctantbecausewai t
se
l
ewenagor edi kgangt sadi babymamadi ntsey ang.
Buthenev erst opped.If ellforhi m.Kanapel oe
maswebat hong.If ellforhim, thenhi sbabymama
cameback.I fIt elly ouhowv ilethatwomani syou
won’ tbeliev eme, theyal way ssaydi babymamaar e
dramat i
cbutt hatonet akest het r
ophy .Mogi r
lhad
abandonedherf ami lyformont hsthenal lofa
suddenshecomesback.Shecal l
edmenames, she
calledmeKi ngKong, Gor i
ll
a.Shewentonwi thher
namecal ling, It oldguy ,look, ifyouwantme, sayso
butal sof eel freet ogobackt oy ourbabymama.
Ny aaguysai dhechosemeonl yfort hreemont hs
l
atert osayenehel ov eshi sbabymama.Iwasangr y
andhur t,
If eltusedbutt henday saf terthewhol e
i
nci dentIl ookedatmy selfont hemi r
rorandr ealized
thatar rgIhav ebeenl ett
ingt hi smenuseme.I t’
snot
aboutmyski n, Icoul dhav ebeenl ightski nnedand
thesamet hingwoul dhav ehappened.It ookcr appy
behav iorbecauseIf eltitwasami racletheywer e
evendat i
ngmei nthef ir
stpl ace, mi stookt hei
rlust
forlov e.ButnowIhav el earnt, andt histimear oundI
am woke.Iam wokei
nmydar
kski
nandIam pr
oud.
#Pr
oudBeingDark’

Kennyscr
oll
eddownt
othecomment
s.
Comment :Ineverr
eadl ongpostbuttodayIdi
d.My
daughterisdarkskinned, shehasbeenhavi
ng
tr
oubleaccept i
ngherselfbecauseoftheconst
ant
comment ssher eceives,Iam goingt
oreadthi
sto
herandshowhert hereisnot hi
ngwrongwit
hbeing
darkskinned.
Comment :Il
oveal
lyourpostsandy
ourpi
ctur
es,
thatbabymamaisjustbi
tter
.
Comment
:#Pr
oudBei
ngDar
k…l
ovet
hemot
ion.Il
ove
you
Comment :Ilovethef actthatyouaddressedthefact
thatyounowknowt hati t
’snottheski
nt hatal
ways
l
eadst ofai
ledrelati
onships.Ar eal
i
tyweneedt o
face.I
famanr eall
ylovesy ouhewouldn’tcareifyou
aredarkorlight.
Comment
:Di
babymamakabobi
tt
er!
Comment
:YesQueen!

Kennychuckl
edgi
vi
ngbackt
hephone.“
Wow!
”
“
Youcal
l
edherKi
ngKong?
”
Thesi
ster
slaughed.
“Ididn’
tmeani t
,Ij
ustwantedhertol
eavemyman
alone.Letherbedarkandproudfarf
rom myf
ami
ly
andIwon’ thaveanyprobl
em wit
hher.
”
“
Sheposteditl
astni
ght
,herpostsofarhas14k
l
ikesand3K+comments.Thesharesaremuch
more.”
“Thereisnothingwrongwi t
hbei ngdar k,nnaIget
herpointmmehel asheshouldst ayawayf r
om
people’
smen.Kanat hi
swomanev ensai dshewi l
l
dateRonaj usttoteachmeal essonsoy es, I
unprovokedhat eherebil
eIwillnev erl
ikeher.Tryi
ng
tousemyki dstogetthei
rfather.Ifitwasn’tthat
Ronahadl eftthestoveonIwoul dhav ebel i
evedshe
i
st heonewhobur ntdownt hehouse.Shei s
capable.
”
Kenny
’sphoner
angt
henshepi
ckedEsi
’
scal
l
.
“
Hey
…”
“
Hey
,Ihav
ejustt
oucheddownbacki
nGabs.
”
“
Howwast
hev
acat
ion?
”
“
Ilov
edi
t.Howi
sitgoi
ngt
her
e?”
“
Wel
l
.Reemet
siboRona.
”
“
Yousoundsohappy
.Iam happyf
ory
ou.
”
“
Thanky
oubabe.
”
“
Okby
e.”
“
Shar
p.”
Mi
alookedatKenny
.“Ir
eal
l
ydon’
tli
keEsi
.”
“
Why
?”
“
Arr
g…shehast
hisv
ibeIdon’
tli
ke.
”
“Esi
istheni
cestper
sonofal
lti
me.Justgett
oknow
herandyouwil
lsee.
”
“
Ify
ousayso.
”
*
**

Namet sowentthroughKenny’
sf acebookpict
uresof
KennyinherGermanpr i
ntdress.Shesighed
wonder i
ngifev
erMaat l
awouldev ermarryher.He
neversaidanyt
hingaboutmarriageandshewas
afr
aidtoask.Yaonecall
edher.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,Iam att
hegat
e.Ibr
oughty
ourcake.
”
Namet sosmil
edthenwalkedoutofthehouse
pr
essingthegate’
sremote.Shewentoutsi
dethen
walkedtothewhit
egolf
.Yaoneroll
eddownher
windowandgav ehert
hecake.
“
Happybi
rt
hdayf
ri
end.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Meetmyf
iancé,
Rebaone.
”
Namet
sobendedandl
ookedatRebawhosmi
l
edat
her
.
“
Hi.
”
Nametsoswal
l
owedt
henl
ookedatYaonewhowas
smi
li
ng.
“
Hepr
oposedy
est
erday
!”
Namet
sof
orcedasmi
l
e.
“
Iam happyf
ory
ou.
”
“
Thanksl
ove.Any
way
s,seey
ou!
”
“
Yah.
”
Namet
sowal
kedi
nsi
det
hehouseandcal
l
edhi
m.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Myf
ri
end?Real
l
y?”
“
Canwet
alkl
ateron?Iam st
il
lwi
thmywoman.
”
“
Yousonofabi
tch!Youar
esopat
het
ic,
togoaf
ter
myfr
iend?
”
“
Bye.
”
Hedroppedthecal
lasshebreathedheav
ilyasanger
tr
avel
ledthr
oughherbl
oodveins.Shecal
ledhim
agai
n.
“
Look-
“
“
Wher
edoy
oust
ay?Iwantust
otal
k.”
“
Iam busyatt
hemoment
.”
Hehungup.Sheangr
il
ylookedatherphonet
hen
l
ookedatt
hecake.Shetookitandt
hrewiti
nthebi
n.

*
**

Emasmi ledchecki
ngacoupleofcomment sonher
facebookpostwhil
edelet
ingi
rr
elevantcomments.
Shef i
nal
lyputawayherphoneandsteppedoutof
hercaratthemall.
“
Hey
…”
Shet
urnedandl
ookedataf
ami
l
iarf
ace.
“
Hi…”
“
Rememberme?
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
YesbutIam notsur
ewher
eImety
ou.
”
“Iam Tat
so,
wemetatKenny ’
shouse.Nakoyagore
banyobanereemekont
le.(
Thetimetheyfucked
whi
l
ewewai
tedout
side.
)”
Emal
aughedr
ecal
l
ing.“
Hi!
”
“
Ihear
dtheyar
eget
ti
ngmar
ri
ed.
”
Shesmiled.“
Yeah,
gladIam nol
ongerpar
toft
he
mix.Al
mostwentcrazy.
”
Theybot
hwal
kedi
nsi
det
hemal
l
.
“
NnaIwasneverinv
est
edi
nKenny.Wewer
eonl
y
f
ri
endssoIr
eall
ywasn’
taf
fect
ed.
”
Emalaughed.“IwishIwasyou.Iwasina
rel
ati
onshi
paloneandnextthingIhear
dIl
ove
mmagweQandt her
eisnot
hingIcandoaboutt
hat
.”
Tast
ojoi
nedherl
aughi
ng.“Batl
aohurda!Mj
oloke
scam.(
Theywil
lhur
tyou.Dat
ingisascam.)
”
“
Hey,kehaselosamometsoseemaha.
”She
t
ouchedherneck.“
Keut
lwadlev
u!”
Theyl
aughedev
enhar
der
.
“Osakgonegohema?(
Youwer
eunabl
eto
breat
he?
)”
“
Heel
a,kehemakast
rol
l
.(Iwasbr
eat
hingt
hrough
t
hest
rol
l
.)”
“Mjol
ot hedat
ing!Bat
laohur
derbaf
anaba,
dangerous.Otlaswa.
”
“Kerati
l
egoswamot
howamodi
mo.(
Ial
most
died.
)”
“Ng,aker ewenay ouwer etheimpli
cati
onsintheir
relat
ionship.Tomorrowont hei
rweddingdaybarei t
wasabumpyr idebutwemadei t,t
heymeany ou
sincewenakewenabumpyr i
deyabone.Kewena
wehav ethroughaloty abone.Whent heysayitwas
tough,thedev i
lwast esti
ngus, y
ouaret hedev
ilthey
aretalkingabout.”
Tear
srandownEma’
scheeksasshel
aughed.
“
Otest
imonyyabone,bareGodthankyouforbei
ng
wi
thusdur
ingourchal
lenges,
chal
lengeskewena.”
Theyl
aughedsohar
dthatpeopl
elookedatt
hem.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#106

Latert
hatni
ght
,Mi
aspokeonherphonewi
thVi
ctor
standi
ngatt
hegat
e.
“
Soev
ery
thi
ngwentwel
l
?”
“Yes.I
twasbeauti
ful
.Itwassobeaut
if
ulwhen
everyt
hingwasdoneIfel
tli
keIwantt
ogetmarri
ed
too.
”
Vi
ctorl
aughed.“
Let
’swai
tfort
woormor
eyear
s.”
Miasi
ghed.“ Ngng,nnaIstil
lwantt
oenjoymyl
if
e
bef
oreIgetmar r
ied.Idon’
twanttospendmyyouth
keleamarriedwomani nsteadofenj
oyi
ngmy
i
ndependencyhela.”
“Howismarr
iagesupposedt
ost
opy
ouf
rom
enj
oyi
ngyourli
fe?
”
“Bei
ngmar riedl
imit
syou.Kanawenayouwon’t
understandbecauseyouhaveenj
oyedyourl
i
feto
thefull
est.
”
“
Sowhendoy
out
hinky
ouwoul
dwantt
oget
mar
ri
ed?
”
“
Inmylat
etwenti
es.FornowhelannaIdon’
tsee
mysel
fmarr
iedorhavi
ngkids.
”
“
SoIam supposedt
owai
tfor10y
ear
sti
l
lyouwant
t
ogetmarri
ed?”
“Vi
ctorIam say i
ngnnaIam notr eadyfort
hatstep.
Youcan’ttellmey ouwantmet ogetmar ri
edeven
bef
oreIfinishatuniversi
tyorbeforeIcanest
abli
sh
myselfcareerwise.Iwanttobuil
dmyhouseandget
myselfacarbef oreIgetmarri
ed.ThereisalotI
wanttodobef or
egetti
ngmar ri
ed.”
“
Am Isupposedt
owai
tteny
ear
sfory
ou?
”
“Yes,i
fyouwanttol
eavey
oucanl
eav
e.NnaIam
notreadyformar
ri
age.
”
“
Youknowwhat
,Ihav
etogo.
”
Hehungup.Herphonei
mmedi at
elyr
angt
henshe
smi
ledpi
cki
ngherboyfr
iend’
scal
l.
“
Heybabe…”
“
Hey
,howdi
ditgo?
”
“
Itwasamazi
ng.
”
“
Iwasthi
nki
ngwegot oNamibi
a,Ihaveabusi
ness
meet
ingt
heresoy oucancomewith.Wecangot o
t
hebeachfr
om there.
”
“
Real
l
y?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Iam i
n!”
“
Ok,
wewi
l
ltal
kaboutwheny
ougetback.
”
“
Okl
ove.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“Il
oveyout
oo,Iam goi
ngoutwi
tht
heboy
s,Iwi
l
l
cal
lyoubef
oreIsl
eep.”
“
Don’
tcheatonme.
”
“
Nev
er!
”
Hehungup.Sheopenedhermessagesthenl
ooked
atacoupl
eoffl
ingsandrepl
i
edtothem.Herphone
rangagai
nandi
twas‘ Br
okeguy
’.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Heybabe,
myl
oveIsawy
ourst
atus,
youl
ooked
beaut
if
ult
oday
.”
Sher
oll
edherey
es.“
Thabang,
Iam st
il
lwai
ti
ng.
”
“
Eish,
babe,
youknowbei
ngunempl
oyedI
-“
“
Mysi
steri
scal
l
ingme,
bye!
”
Shehungupandwal
kedt
othehouse.

*
**

At
sil
ehandedApr
ilherj
uice.
“
Babe,
todayBoi
neel
ocal
l
edme,
anex.
”
Apr
ill
ookedathi
m.“
Neabat
lang?(
Whatdi
dshe
want
?)”
“
Shewant
stomeetandt
alk.It
oldherno.
”
Apri
lsmil
ed.“
Youdi
dwel
lmyboy
,youshoul
dbl
ock
hert
oo.”
“
Ial
readybl
ockedher
.”
Apri
ll
aughed.“
Ilov
ey ou.Youdi
dwel
l
,ebi
l
eyou
deser
vearewardnyana.”
Helookedatherwi
thasmi
l
e.“
Shoul
dIt
akeoutmy
di
ck?”
Shel
aughedev
enhar
der
.“Bat
hongAt
sil
e!”
“
Shoul
dI?
”
“
Lett
hemov
ieend.
”
“
Ok.
”
“Babe,doyout
hinkIshoul
dtal
ktoKennyabout
havingadoubl
ewedding?”
“Idon’tknow,butdoyout
hinkaf
tereveryt
hingshe
hasbeent hroughshewoul
dwanttoshar etheday
shefinall
ymar r
iest
hemanshehasl ovedforyear
s?”
Apri
ll
ookedathi
m.“
Yout
hinki
t’
snotagoodi
dea
babe?”
“”
Iam j
ustsayi
ng,doyout
hinkshewoul
dwantt
o
shar
eherspeci
alday?
”
Apr
lsi
ghed.“
Iguessnot
.”
Heki
ssedher
.“Shoul
dIt
akeoutmydi
cknow?
”
Apr
ill
ookedathi
mlaughi
ng.“
Ok.
”
Hequickl
ystoodupt aki
ngitout
.Apri
lknel
tbef
ore
hi
m andtookitinherhand.Helookeddownand
watchedherstar
tsuckinghi
sdick.

*
**

Mothusi
lookedatKenny’spi
ctur
es.Helookedather
i
ntheGermanprintdressandheels.Hesmil
edand
r
eactedonthepict
ures.Sel
etsocall
ed.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Hey,Iam t
ryi
ngt
ocal
lNanaobutshei
snot
picki
ng.”
“
Letmehandov
ert
hephone.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hewenttot
hesi
tt
ingr
oom andgav
ehi
swi
fet
he
phone.
“
Sel
etso.
”
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,ar
ethosesui
tsal
readyf
ini
shed?
”
“
Theyhav
ebeenl
ongf
ini
shed.
”
“
Eish.
.”
Nanaol
aughed.“
Ior
der
edmor
e.Theywi
l
lbear
ri
vi
ng
i
ntwoweeks.”
“
Thammaputmef
ir
stony
ourl
i
st.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Thanks,
byt heway ,t
hishol
idayIwon’
tbeableto
t
aketheboys,nnalehubbywi l
lbetr
avel
li
ng.Iwas
t
hinki
ngtheyvisi
tthei
rgrannykoShakawe.”
“
Nopr
obl
em wi
thme.
”
“
Great,
Iwil
lsendthethi
ngsIhadboughtt
hem
t
hroughspr
intcour
ier
s.”
“
Ok.
”
“
Shar
p.”
Sel
etsohungupt henthefacebookpagewherehe
hadbeenappearedont hescreen.Nanaol
ookedat
Kenny’
spict
ureswi t
haf r
own.
“
Whyar
eyoust
alki
ngher
?”
“
Huh?
”
“
Whyar
eyoust
alki
ngher
?”
“Iam notstal
kingher
.Iwasscr
oll
i
ngdownand
cameacr ossthosepi
ctur
es.
”
“
Doy
oust
il
ll
oveKenny
?”
“Thi
sisgett
ingol
d.Obatlagor
eomana,(
Youwant
ustoargue,
)Iam noti
nthemoodf
orthat
.SoIcan’
t
viewherpi
ctur
esbecauseshei
smyex?”
“
Inev
ersai
dthat
.”
“
Thenwhatareyousaying?Lewenay oucansee
t
hesephot
osareinmyt imeli
ne.Kennyi
saf acebook
f
ri
endandthat
’sal
l.Ineverevental
ktoher.
”
Shecl
ickedKenny’
spr
ofi
l
ethencheckedt
hei
r
messagesbutther
ewasnot
hing.
“
Sor
ry.
”
Het
urnedt
otheTVsi
l
ent
ly.
“
BabeIam sor
ry.
”
“
It
’sf
ine.
”
Shescrol
leddownKenny ’
sprof
il
estar
ingather
beauti
ful
pict
uresthenputdownthephoneandput
herheadonMot husi
’schest
.

*
**

Namet soparkedthecaratReba’
shousethen
steppedoutandknockedonthedoor.Heopened
andlookedather.
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evey
ou.
”
“Idi
dn’
tevenknowYaonewasy ourf
ri
end.Yaone
wasmyclientandIknewherevenbeforeIknewyou.
Youareacti
ngchil
dishr
ightnow.”
“
Youneedt
obr
eakupwi
thher
.Youcan’
tdat
emy
f
ri
end.
”
“YouandIdi dn’
tdat
eforalongtime.Idon’
teven
consideryouanexbutIam goingtotel
lYaonethe
enti
retrut
hwhenshear r
ives.Sheisonherway
here.
”
“
Youar
enotgoi
ngt
orui
nmyf
ri
endshi
p!”
“Youcomingt
omyhouseanddemandi
ngIbreakup
witht
hewomanwhom Iwantt
omarryprov
estome
other
wise.
”
“Ican’
tbel
i
eveyoufindnot
hingwr
ongwi
tht
his.
Yaoneismybestfr
iend.
”
“AndYaonei smyf iancé.Yourproblem i
syouexpect
thi
ngst ojusthappenf oryou.Youaresoself
centeredyoudon’tev enseeitwheny ouarewrong.I
can’tbeli
eveallal
ongInev ersawit.SobecauseI
datedy ouforwhat?Af ewweeksy oualr
eadyfeel
enti
tledtotell
mewhoIcanorcannotdat e?”
Hi
scardrov
eint
henYaonest
eppedoutwi
thaf
rown
onherf
ace.
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
eNamet
so?
”
Namet
sosmi
l
ed,
herhear
tpoundi
ng.“
Iknowhi
m.”
“
From?
”
“
HewasthatguyIt
oldy
ouaboutwi
tht
hecr
azybaby
mama.
”
“
Ok…sowhatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”
“
Shewast
ell
i
ngmet
obr
eakupwi
thy
ou.
”
“
Look-
“
“
Babe,
geti
nsi
de.Iwi
l
ltal
kwi
thher
.”
Rebaonet
urnedandwal
kedbackinsi
det
hehouse
whil
eYaonetur
nedtoNametso.
“
Iam j
ustl
ooki
ngputf
ory
ou.Hi
sbabymama-
“
“Haket shosiwekebabymamanna.( Ababymama
doesn’tscareme. )Hisbabymamai snotani ssuet o
me,mosadi mogol oolegaantshuse.( t
hatold
womandoesn’ tscareme.)Shei sli
keat oothless
dog,allbarknoact i
onmmeshewi l
l knowmeaf t
er
theweddi ng.SheisgoingtoknowwhoIr eall
yam.I
can’
tbel i
evey oucameher etotellmymant obr eak
upwi t
hme.Iam gl adthi
shappenedsoonert han
l
ater.I
nsteadofcomi ngtomey oufounditfitto
approachmyman.Iam notgoi ngtoent er
tainy ou
becauseal r
eadyy ouaremyman’ sex.”
“
Idon’
twanthi
m.”
“Idon’
tknowwhatyouwant.Al
readyy
ouare
showingmewhoy oureal
l
yareandmay beKenny
wasn’tsowrongtocutyouoff
.Onalebonoga
nyanaandIam notgoingtowaitf
ory
outoshowme
yourtruecol
ors.
”
“
Soy
ouar
egoi
ngt
oletamancomebet
weenus?
”
“Themanwhoi
sgoi
ngt
obemyhusbandsoon,
yes.
Bye.
”
Shewal
kedi
nherhousel
eav
ingNamet
sost
andi
ng
by.

*
**

Emasmil
edreadi
nghert
ransf
erl
ett
er.Shej
umped
scr
eami
ng.
“
Yes!Thanky
ouLor
d!”
Sher ereadthelet
teragainthensmi l
edsendi
ngher
response.Herstomachcont entsl
if
ted,shequickl
y
gotupandr ushedt othebathroom andvomit
ed.She
washedhermout hthenpeed, t
heti
nybloodstain
caughtherattenti
on.Shesighednowunder st
anding
whatshehadbeenf eeli
ngthenwalkedt oher
bedr
oom andchangedherpant
iesput
ti
ngonapad.
Herphoner
ang.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,It
houghtIwoul
dcal
lbef
oreIsl
eep.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Hi,
myt
ransf
erhasbeenappr
oved!
”
Tat
sol
aughed.“
Goi
ngasf
arasy
oucanf
rom t
hem?
”
“
Yesandnev
ercomi
ngbackt
oGabor
one.
”
“
Goodl
uckont
hat
.”
“
Thanks.
”
“
Goodni
ght
.”
“
Bye.
”
Shehungupandsmi
l
ed.

*
**

Kennylai
dont hebedwithherki
dstr
yingt
oget
them t
osleep.Herphonerangst
art
li
ngthem.She
r
eachedf
ori
tandanswer
ed.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
…howmuchdi
dtheychar
gehi
m?”
“IwishIknewNolo.Hopef
ull
ynotal
otsi
nceokilea
ntshamagadi.(
heoncepaidbri
depr
icebef
ore.
)”
“
Yeah…y
oumustbehappy
.”
“
Iam.
”
“Ihopethatwhor
ingPAyaRonaisgone,ifshe
couldn’
tfi
ndanyt
hingwr
ongwi t
hkissi
ngandsitt
ing
onhi m wi
thyoui
nthepr
esence,whatcanstopher
now? ”
Kennypausedreal
i
zingNol
owasn’
tawar
eofwhat
shehadjustsai
d.
“
Yaone?
”
“
Eneway
ell
o-…GoodLor
d!”
“
Nyaa,
justf
ini
shwhaty
ouwer
esay
ing.
”
“
Ithappenedagesback.
”
“
Wasi
tthet
imey
ouaskedmeabouthi
sPA?
”
“Hesai
dnot
hinghappened.LennaImusthavenot
seenpr
oper
ly,
Ithi
nkhewaspushi ngherof
f.
”
“
Tshenol
o,war
eng?
”
“
Iam sayi
ng,youar
egett
ingmarr
ied,
lett
hepastbe
i
nthepast.Iwal
kedonhi
m pushi
ngheroff.
”
“
Youknowy
ouar
ely
ingt
ome.By
e.”
Shehungupt
hengotupandcal
l
edRona.
“
MmaMot
samai
.”
“BabeIknowwhaty oudidwit
hYaoneandIknowi t
happenedlongback, Ij
ustcal
ledherandshet old
me.Iam givingyouachancet otell
met hetrut
hso
thatwedon’tgetmar ri
edcarr
yingli
eswithus.The
mar r
iagecounselorsai
dweshoul dbetransparent
witheachother.Ialr
eadyknowt hetr
uth,asmyman,
Iwanty outotel
lme. ”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#107

Atthehotel
,Rona’
shear
tpoundedashel
i
stenedt
o
herspeakcalml
ythenswal
lowed.
“
Iam notgoi
ngtobr
eakupwi
thy
ou.Ij
ustwanty
ou
t
obehonestwit
hme.”
“
Idi
dn’
tsl
eepwi
thher
.”
“
Ronawee,kekopannet
e.(
RonacanIpl
easehav
e
t
hetr
uth.
)Please.
”
“
Iswearbabe.Idi
dn’
tsl
eepwi
thher
.”
“
Ok,
whatdi
dyoudot
hen?Nomor
eli
espl
ease.
”
“Shesuckedmydi ckbutthatwasal
l.Iwassexuall
y
frustrat
ed.Youwer eal
way sangr
yanddeny ingme
sex.Iam notmaki ngexcusesformyactionsbutI
nev ersleptwit
hherIswearonmyl i
fe.Ineverdi
d
any thi
ngwi t
hherfrom t
hen.Iswear
.”
Kennysighed.“
Ok.I
t’
sok.I
t’
sint
hepast
.Iwi
l
lleti
t
sl
idebecauseIknowhowIwas..
”
Hesi
ghedwi
thr
eli
ef.“
Ilov
eyou.
”
“Il
oveyout
oo,
wheni
shercont
ractcomi
ngt
oan
end?”
“
Inacoupl
eofmont
hs.
”
“Iam notcomfor
tabl
ewi t
hherbei
ngyourPA
anymore.Idon’
tknowwhaty ouar
egoingtodo
aboutherbutIam notcomfort
abl
ewi
thhersti
l
l
worki
ngf ory
ou.”
“
Ok.Iwi
l
ldeal
wit
hit
.”
“Youcansitdownol esegohemahema.(
andst
op
breat
hingheavi
ly
.)”
Hesatont
hebed.
“
Ist
her
eany
thi
ngel
sey
out
hinkIshoul
dknow?
”
“
No.
”
“Ar
eyousur
e?I
fther
eis,
thi
sist
hebestt
imet
o
comeout
.”
“
That
’sal
l
.”
“
Ok.Byt
heway
,It
iedmyt
ubes.
”
“Ok,Ial
sodon’
twantmor
ebabi
es.Thet
ri
plet
sar
e
expensi
ve.
”
“
Theyar
e.Iam sl
eepy
.Goodni
ght
.”
“
Keagor
ata.(
Ilov
eyou.
)”
Kennychuckl
edandy
awnedsl
eepy
.“Ng…”
“
Babe?
”
“
Ilov
eyout
ooRona.
”
Shehungup,hesmiledf
oramomentt
henst
opped
smil
i
ngcall
ingYaone.
“
Mr.Mot
samai
?”
“
Whatdi
dyout
ell
Kenny
?”
“
Sir
?”
“
Shesai
dshej
ustspoket
oyou.
”
“
Spoketome?Ihaven’
tspokent
oMr
s.Mot
samai
in
t
helongestt
ime.
”
Roacl
osedhisey
esandsighed.“
Ok.Iwantt
osee
youf
ir
stint
hemor ni
ngonMonday .
”
“
Yessi
r.Ev
ery
thi
ngal
ri
ght
?”
“Wewil
ltal
konMonday.Fi
rstt
hingint
hemor
ning.
Bytheway,wheni
sKenny’
scararri
vi
ng?”
“
Itshoul
dbear
ri
vi
ngt
omor
row.
”
“
Ok.Seey
out
omor
row.
”
“
Yessi
r.
”
Acall
camet
hroughthenhedr
oppedt
hecal
land
pi
ckedhi
smother
’s.
“
Rona?
”
“
Mama…”
“
Ihopet
hisgi
rlwon’
tleav
eyouagai
n.”
“
Shewon’
t.
”
“Gi
rl
slikeherwi
l
lalwaysdof
unnyt hi
ngs,Ir
eall
y
don’
tli
keherbutIam goi
ngt
ot r
yandl i
keherfor
yoummeenehel agakemorate.(butIdon’
tli
ke
her.
)”
“
Kennyi
sal
ovel
yper
son.
”
“KanaIdon’
tevenknowhert
hatwell
becausesheis
alwaysnotar
ound.Andwhenshecomesback,she
sendsyoutojai
l.
”
“
Shesentmetojai
lforar
eason.Shedidn’
tjust
wakeupanddeci
detosendmet ojai
l
.”
“Howarethekids?Youshoul
dbri
ngthem somet
ime
Rona.Iam l
onely,
Icoul
dusethei
rcompany.”
“Ok.Iwi
l
lgi
vey
ouKenny
’snumber
.Youcant
alkt
o
her.
”
“
Can’
tyouj
ust
-“
“Mama,youcant alkt
oheranddi scusswhenyou
wantthekids.Kennyi
smywi fe.Youcan’tavoi
dher.
Sheisyourdaughteri
n-l
aw,yourdaughternow.Let
mesendhernumbernow. ”
Hehungupandsenthert
henumber
.

Thr
eeMont
hsLat
er…

DuringtheSaturdaymor ni
ng,shower sofrainf
ell
softl
yslowlywettingt heground.Kennystoodbyt he
windowi nherwhi tegownt hathuggedherhi ps
goingdownwi thav entthatstar
tedjustbelowher
midt hi
gh.Theov erskirtt
rail
edbehindher.Thedoor
openedandmmagweTumowal kedi
n.Shesmi
l
ed
walki
ngovert
hengr
abbedKenny’
sbouquet
.
“
Weneedt
ogetgoi
ng.
”
“
It
’sr
aini
ng.
”
“
Justmor
ningshower
s.I
t’
sabeaut
if
ulday
.”
Kennyturnedt
ommagweTumoandl
ookedather
tear
ful
l
y .
“
Whati
fitr
ainsmor
e?”
“
Kenny
,it
’snotgoi
ngt
orai
n.”
“
HasKef
il
wear
ri
ved?
”
“
Noty
et.
”
Shenoddedt
henatearrol
leddownhercheek.
MmagweTumowi peditaway.
“
Todayyouareof
fici
all
ygoi
ngt
obeMr
s.Mot
samai
.
Not
hingwi
llst
opthat.
”
“
Eemma.
”
“
Good,
nowst
opcr
ying.
”
Shehandedhert
hef
lower
sthenEsi
wal
kedi
ninher
gownandsmi
l
ed.
“
Ready
?”
MmagweTumosmi
l
edatEsi
.“Yes.Weneedt
oget
t
othegar
den.
”
Shewal
kedoutt
henEsi
lookedatKenny
.
“
Wow!Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Thanks.
”
Esif
ixedt
hegownthenhel
dKenny
’shands.“
Arey
ou
sur
ey ouwantt
odothi
s?”
Shesmil
ed.“
Yes,ei
therway,
Ronasayshewi
l
l
for
cef
ull
ymarrymeIlikei
tordon’
t.
”
Theybot
hlaughed.
“
Wait
seRonabathong.Kemokgal
emetsi
.(I
r
epr
imandedhi
m.)Hewi l
lnev
erputhi
shandson
y
ou.
”
“Thanky
ou.Iam sohappyImety
ou.Youhav
e
becomeapartofmeIcan’tl
iv
ewithout
.”
Esil
ookedatherandhuggedherbl
i
nki
ngawayher
tear
s.“
Ilov
eyou.”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.Youl
ookbeaut
if
ult
oo.
”
“
Let
’sgomma.Yourmani
swai
ti
ng.
”
“
Iam comi
ng.Gi
vemeasecond.
”
ShewalkedoutthenKennyt
ookherhandbagand
tookoutthepi
ctur
eframeofhergr
andmother
.

*
**

AtRona’
shouse,Ronafi
nishedf
ixi
nghi
msel
f.
Lebi
tsowal
kedinandlaughed.
“
Final
l
yjoi
ningt
hecl
ub!
”
Ronalaughed.“
Tsek!Ihavebeeni
nthecl
ub,
just
thati
twasn’tof
fi
cial
yet.
”
Lebi
tsofi
xedhi
sri
ngandsmil
ed.“
Youdon’
thav
e
thi
s.Someofushavebeenmar
ri
edfory
ear
snow.”
“
Fucki
ngwit
houtar
ingknowi
ngy
ouar
esi
nni
ngi
s
t
hebest.
”
“
Heav
eni
sapl
acey
ouwi
l
lnev
ersee.
”Lebi
tsof
ixed
hi
sti
e.“
Readyt
ocl
aimy
ourgi
rl
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Nosecondt
hought
s?”
“
Non!
”
“
That
’swhatIwantt
ohear
.Nomor
egames.
”
Ronasmi
l
ed.“
Let
’sgo.
”
“Ist
il
lcan’tbeli
evet
hatKennyst
art
edsucha
beauti
fulplace.
”
“Shedi
debi
let
heseday
sshesaysIshoul
dcal
lher
busi
nesswoman.Omolal
any
ana.”
“IwishPeowasl i
kethat.Mywifedoesn’
tmindnot
working.Ebileshecall
sbeingahousewifea
profession.Ofcauseitdoesn’
tbothermebutjust
seeingawomanwhoi sincontrol
aapereheel
sand
formal weargosexyny ana.Theconfi
dencet
hose
womenhav eisatur
non. ”
“Ei
shwabua.I thi
tsdif
fer
entwhenIlookatMma
Mot samaiinherf
ormalwearinbusi
nessmode, i
t’
sa
bigturnonespecial
l
ytofuckheratworkknowing
verywellgorewhenyouaredone,bot
hofy ouare
gett
ingbacktowor k.Kanawhenwif
eyisinbusiness
mode, shet
endst ogetevenmoresexykaboalpha
nyanaanditfeel
sgr eatwhenyouf
uckhertojust
tameherdown. ”
“
Exact
lybutPeowon’
theari
t.
”
“
Peopl
edi
ff
er.
”
“Iknowbutahh.
.itget
sbor
ingsomet
imes.Kanay
a
offi
cekeyonesentl
e.”
Ronal
aughed.“
Enekey
one!
”
Theywalkedt
othecarswhi
chwerewai
ti
ngf
ort
hem
totaket
hem t
otheevent
’sgar
den.

*
**

AtKenny ’
sGar den,carsdroveint hroughthepav ed
dri
veway ,onthesideitwast hebeaut if
ulgreenlawn.
Carsdr ov
et othedesignatedpar kingandpar ked
there.Gueststeppedoutoft heircarselegantly
dressedthenf ol
lowedt hesignst owheretheywoul d
seat.Inabeaut i
fulsetup,theyallsatdownont he
chair
splacedont helawn.Thepondadi stantfrom
them caughtthei
rattent
iont
hatsomeguestt ook
pict
urestherewhilesomegoti mmer sedint he
beautyoftheflowersthatbr
ightenedupt hepl ace.
RonaandLebit
sowalkedtotheai
sletoget
herwit
h
hi
sbrother
sdressedsmart
lyint
uxedos.Kenny
’s
cousi
nswatchedlust
ful
l
ywhisperi
ng.
“ThammaIwoul
dn’
tmi
ndhav
ingRonaf
uckmet
il
lI
can’twal
k.”
Theotherlaughed.Mor eguestsar r
ivedasRona
chatt
edwi t
hhi sbrothers.Kenny’srelati
vesfil
ledup
thespacest henfi
nallymmagweTumoandr ragwe
Tumowal kedov erandsatdownsmi l
ing.Asong
slowl
ystartedplayingast heyalll
ookedbehi nd,
TshenoloandEsi wal kedovertot heaisletogether
withMai t
henst oodtheot hersideoft hepastor.
TheguestsstoodupasKennyslowlywal
kedov
er
al
oneholdingherbouquetoff
lower
s.

Ther
egoesmyhear
tbeat
ing
‘
Causey
ouar
ether
eason
I
’
mlosi
ngmysl
eep
Pl
easecomebackno

Ther
egoesmymi
ndr
aci
ng
Andy
ouar
ether
eason
ThatI
’
m st
il
lbr
eat
hing
I
’
m hopel
essnow

I
’
dcl
i
mbev
erymount
ain
Andswi
m ev
eryocean
Justt
obewi
thy
ou
Andf
ixwhatI
’
vebr
oken
Oh,
‘causeIneedy
out
osee
Thaty
ouar
ether
eason

Ronaswal
l
owedasshewal
kedov
er.Hi
sthought
s
wentbackt othef i
rstdayhemether …theni ghtat
thatclubshehadbeendr ugged.Hehadn’ treali
zed
herbeaut yti
llhegott othelodgeandact uallytooka
l
ookather .Hehadbeengoi ngthroughahar dtime
butthathadn’tst oppedhisheartfrom skippingabit.
Hest i
llcouldremembert hedayatt heri
v er
,just
stari
ngatherl augh.Hest i
l
lcouldremembert he
sadnesshesawi nherey esaft
ershespoket oher
mot her.Fuck!Babehadbeensoy oungt hen.So
younghehadev enf el
tguil
tyadmiringherbeaut y.
Hismindt ookhi
m backtoherfir
stdayi
nGabor one,
thosetestsathi
shousewhileCandywast her
e…di d
sheremembert hose?Hesighed.Heremember ed
those,
howi thadbeenexci
tingwait
ingasshety ped,
thoseglanceshestol
etocatchthatsmil
ewhenshe
readhismessages.
Hechuckledalonerecall
ing…thent heirfi
rstnight
together
.Hehadf al
lenindeepthatday .Hecoul d
sti
llr
ememberev erystr
oke…ev erygr untandmoan.
Howcoul dheforget…?Ithadbeent heni ghthegav e
herhisenti
reheartonasi l
verpl
atter.Theni ghthe
hadchosent ol
ovet hi
swomanandl oveherhar der
t
hanev
er.Godknewhewoul
ddi
eforheri
fhehadt
o.
Heswal l
owedassheadv anced.Didsheev en
remembert hem choosi
ngt hathouseforher ?And
thei
rfi
rstfightoverthecondom.Hesmi led,yeah…it
hadtobet hatdaywher ehel earntt
hathert ongue
l
ikedgetti
ngl oose.Yearslater
,seeingherwal kover
tohim st
il
l hadhisheartpoundingal l
excit
edj ust
l
ikethatnighthehadpi ckedherupatbusr ank.
Tearsf
il
ledhiseyes,hecoul
dhavenev
erthought
theywouldhavesurviv
edhergoi
ngtoj
ail
buthere
theywere,goi
ngstrong.
Bit
sopattedhi
sbackashel ookedupbli
nking.She
handedthefl
owerstoTshenoloandheldhishands.
Hesmi l
edtear
ful
l
ystari
ngather .Shel
ookedso
beauti
ful
….Wasthishi
sgirl
?
Kennylookedathimt earfull
y,herheartpoundingso
muchagai nstherchest.Hest eppedbackt urni
ngt o
hi
sbr other
s,tear
sinhisey es,tearsofnothingbut
happiness.Hisuncl
est oodupandwal kedov erthen
whisperedtothem thattheyallcrackedupl aughing
whil
eKennysmi l
edcuriouslylookingatthem
snif
fi
ng.Thepastoralsolaughedshaki
nghishead
ashisunclewalkedbackt ohisseat
.Ronatookout
thehandkerchi
effr
om hispicketandwipedhisey
es
beforet
urningbacktoKenny .
Thepast
orsmi
l
ed.Theshower
sofr
ainhadl
ong
st
opped.
“
Ladiesandgentl
emen,
letmest
artbyi
nvol
vi
ngGod
i
ntoday’
sevent.
”
Everyoneclosedthei
reyesasRonasqueezed
Kenny ’
shandslist
eningtothepastorpraying.They
al
lsaidAmensecondsl atert
henhedi dthe
i
ntroducti
onandr eadaf ewscri
ptsfrom thebible.
Hef i
nall
ylookedatthecouple.
“
Arona,
Iheary
ouhav
esomet
hingsweett
otel
lyour
t
obewife.
”
Hesmiled,everyonekeptqui
etwhil
ethecamer as
r
oll
edtakingv i
deos.Hesmi l
edunbutt
oninghis
j
ackett
henl ookedatherandstart
edsinging.

Ey
ami
ndendwaey
ami
Ohhndi
yay
ithandal
ent
ombi

Sondel
ast
handwasondel
a
Na’
uthandol
wami
lugqi
nel
onke
That
hu’
uthandol
wami
Umi
mb’
uqal
any
e

Ey
ami
ndendwaey
ami
Ohhndi
yay
ithandal
ent
ombi
Amehl
oay
oay
andi
bul
ala
Ohhndi
yay
ithandal
ent
ombi
sondel
a

Kennybl
ushedasshesangthenhepaused.
“Rememberthi
ssong?Thatmorni
ngaft
erwefu-
…
ohhsorr
y.Censor
edinf
ormati
on.
”
Ev
ery
onel
aughedasKennyl
ookeddownshy
ly.
Hesmil
ed.“
Youlookbeauti
ful
,Ican’
tbri
ngt
owor
ds
j
usthowbeaut
if
ulyouare.Yourbeaut
ymakesme
wanttogivey outheworl
d,mathatabaganagoswa
goreresalereletworeratanasentl
esentl
e..
(t
he
probl
em isthattheyar
erefusi
ngtodiesothatonl
y
ustworemai nandloveeachotherproper
ly.
)”
Kennybl
ushedasshesmi
l
edather
.
“Papaweh?Toni
ghtIwon’
tbesinni
ng.Sat
aneonea
setseai
poka.(
Satanwasal
readyboast
ing
himsel
f.
)”
Rona’
sfat
herl
aughed.“
That
’smyboy
!”
“It
houghtIknewwhatIwoul dsaybut …Il ov eyou,I
havelov edyouf ory earsnowbabebutcanIt el
lyou
somet hing?Itstil
lfeelsnewev er yti
meIl ookaty ou.
Ihavet olookatourki dstoremi ndmy selft hatit
’s
beeny ears.Ithinky ouwer etai
lormadef orme
becauseobonannaKenny …kegor atakapel oyame
yotl
hebabe.Iam say ingthi
sev eni nfrontofGod, I
l
ovey oubabe.Inev erl i
kescreami ngthatbut
somet i
mesIcan’ thelpit.Ivowt obef aithf uland
l
ookaty ouonl y
, keny obawenahel a.(fucki ngyou
only
.)”
Kennysmackedhi
m asev
ery
onel
aughed.
“Nyaa,osekawat soga,(
Don’tbescar ed,)todayGod
i
sgi vi
ngmet heri
ghttodoi tpeacef ull
y.Ivowt obe
themany ouneed,toloveandsuppor tyou, tobe
yournumber1cheer l
eader.Ivowt ol ovey outil
lthe
veryendt i
lldeat
hdouspar t
.Iv owt olovey ouev en
i
nsi cknessandheal t
h,i
nhappi nessandsor r
ow.
TodayIam t hehappiestmanal i
vebecauseIhav e
am mar ryi
ngmyoneandonl y
.Mybestf r
iend.Iam
mar ry
ingthemot herofmychi ldren.Ilovey ou.”
Het
ookt
her
ingandsl
i
ditonherf
inger
.
Kennyl
ookedathi
m.
“Il
ovedy ouonthephonebefor
eIcametoGabor
one.
Idi
dn’tsayitbutIdi
d.Nki
lenkakwal
amobukeng
kere(Ioncewroteinabooksayi
ng)Ar
onal
oves
Kenny.
Hel
aughed.“
Youdi
d?”
“
Idid.Irememberwai ti
ngfory
oukobusr ankand
youshowingupi nthosesweatpantsandat -
shi
rt
,
youlookedhot.Isti
ll
recal
lwhatyourfir
stwords
were.Yousaid“Segorogil
esematla’
nyanasame.”
(
“Myf oolhasarri
ved.”
)Rememberourhug?My
hear twasbeat i
ngsof astthenanddeepdownIj ust
knew.Iknewi thadtobey ou, Itjusthadt obey ou.I
can’ ti
magineany oneelsest andingbef or emet his
momentexpecty ou.Ican’
ti magi neanot herman
l
ov ingmeexpecty ou.Ilov
ey ouRona.Il oveyouso
somuchbabe…Il ovedy ouy esterdayIwi l
ll
ov eyou
tomor row,thedayaf t
erandmanymor eday sto
comebecausey ouarethel oveofmyl ife.O
soul mateyameebi lehaokakewar esoul met ol
la.I
alsov owfaithful
ness,Ivowt ol ovey ouandy ouonl y
,
throughhappi nessandsor row, sicknessandheal thy
ti
lldeathdouspar t.
”
Thepast
orsmil
edaseveryonel
ookedatKennysl
i
de
ther
ingonKenny’
sfi
nger
.
“
Andwit
hthepowerinv
estedi
nme,Ipr
onouncey
ou
t
wohusbandandwif
e,youmayki
ssthebr
ide.
”
Ronadidal i
tt
ledancetheleanedoverandkissed
hi
swife.Heputhandsonherwai standki
ssedher
evenharderhisf
atherstoodup,’
“Rona,kgant
ele,
esenggonana.(
Rona,
lat
er,
now
now.)”
Embarr
assedKennymov
edbackt
henRonagav
eher
ababykiss.

7YEARSLATER…

.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#108

Sev
enYear
sLat
er…

AtKenny ’
sEv ent
’sandTr av
elManagement ,Mi
a
walkedinsidethebuil
dinginherti
ghtpantsanda
l
ongsl eevedtoptuckedin.Herseveninchheel
sinch
heelsechoedasshewal kedconf
ident
lyholdi
ngher
coffee.
Shegr
eet
edot
herempl
oyees.
“St
opsippi
ngt
hatcof
fee,
bossladyi
sal
readyher
e
andhasbeenwai
ti
ngforyou.
”
“
Shi
t!
”
“
Shei
sal
readyi
nthemeet
ing.
”
Sheputt hecof
feedownandrushedtoheroff
ice
wheresheputhert hi
ngsdownandheadedtothe
boardr
oom wher eever
yonewas.Kennyt
urnedtoher
wit
haf rown,shetookadeepbreat
h.
“
Iapologi
zeforbei
nglate,
Gabor
onetr
aff
ici
stoo
much.Let’
sgettoi
t,goodmorni
ng.
”
Shest
oodinf
rontofev
ery
one.“
Mynamei
sMi
a
Tot
eng,t
heCOO.”
Kennyleanedbackasshestart
edherpresentati
on
i
nfrontoftheboard.Awhil
elat
ershewr appeditup.
Kennysmi l
ed.“
Thanky ouMsToteng,
canIpl ease
seeyouinmyof fi
ce..
”
Kennywal
kedouttoget
herwi
thot
herwor
ker
swhi
l
e
Miafol
l
owedher.
“
Ihadabr
eakdown.
”
Kennysatdownonherchai
randf
acedher
.
“
Idon’
tli
kel
atecomer
s.”
Mi
asmi
l
ed.“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
HRi
sveryst
ri
ctonthat
,nextt
imet
heyar
egi
vi
ng
y
ouawri
tt
enwarni
ng.”
“
Ilovey
ourhair
.Readyfortoni
ght
?Theof
fi
cial
l
aunchofKenny’
sTravelandTour
s.”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Yes,
Ihav
etogohomeear
li
erke
i
pakany
e.(
andf
ixmy
sel
f.
)”
“
Iam sohappyf
ory
ou.TheMaunt
eam i
sdoi
ngwel
l
t
oo.
”
“
Theyar
eand-
“
Kenny
’sphoner
ang.
“
Mot hersiscal
li
ng,
closet
hedooronyourwayout
.
Nexttimey oucomelat
e,y
ouareget
ti
ngawr i
tt
en
warning.
”
“
Yes!
”
Shetur
nedandwal
kedoutasKennyanswer
edt
he
cal
l.
“
Mama…”
“
Theki
dshav
ear
ri
ved.
”
Kennysmil
ed.“
Ok,
Iwi
l
ldr
ivet
ocol
l
ectt
hem on
Sunday.
”
“
Okmygi
rl
.Howi
swor
k?”
“
Worki
sfine.I
fther
eisany
thi
ngy
ouneed,
justsend
meali
st.
”
“
Okmygi
rl
.By
e.”
“
Bye.
”
Kennyhungupt
hencal
l
edRona.
“
Babe…”
“
Whattimeisyourf
li
ght?Pl
easedon’
tcomel
ate,
I
wi
ll
pickyouupfrom t
heair
port
..
”
“
Iam st
il
li
nKasane,
Iwi
l
ltel
lyouwhenIl
eav
e
Maun.
”
“Ok.Iwil
lbegoi
ngtodomyhai
randnai
l
sina
coupleofhour
s.”
“
DidIt
ell
youIam pr
oudofy
ou?
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Thanks.Imi
ssy
ou.
”
“
Imi
ssy
out
oo.
”
“Youar eal
way stravell
i
ng.Imi ssus.Eventhekids
rarel
yseey ou.Iknowt hebusi nesshasgrown…”She
sighed.“Imissmymanbabe.Whenl astdidwehav e
j
ustgoodsext hatisnothur r
ied?Whenl astdidyou
j
ustf uckmet i
llIcan’tfeel
mypussyany more?We
don’tevengoondat esanymor e.Cometothinkofit
,
wehav
en’
thadsexi
nal
mostt
woweeksnow.
”
“
Iwi
l
lmakei
tupt
oyou.Ipr
omi
se.
”
“
Youal
way
ssayt
hat
.”
“Thi
sti
meImeani t.Matteroff
act
,weshoul
dgoout
onalit
tl
evacat
ion.Justus.”
Kennysmiled.“Ok.Il
oveyou.Don’tcomelate,
we
needtogot ogether
.Gapehelaeveryonewil
lbe
ther
e,youcan’tbelate.
”
“
Ok.
”
“Babewee,kanaIsawsomethi
ngsi
nQ’sphonet
he
othert
ime.Haveyouhadthet
alkwi
thhi
m?”
“
Yeah.
.”
“
Ok.
”
“
Whatdi
dyousee?
”
“
Somev
ideony
ana.
”
Ronal
aughed.“
Whatwashappeni
ngi
nthev
ideo?
”
“I
twaspor
n…afiv
esecondspor
n.KanayanongIget
scar
ed,
kanat
heseday
sokoduny anaQui
nton,hi
s
voiceisget
ti
ngdeepgapehei
stal
l
.Idon’
twanta
grandchi
ldyet
.”
“
Don’
twor
ry.I
t’
sal
lgood.
”
“
Ihopeso.Ok,
letmedoacoupl
eoft
hingst
hengo
t
othespa.”
“
Ok.
”
Shehungup.

*
**

Miawalkedbackinheroffi
cethensatdowntaki
ng
outherphone.Sheopenedhermessagesthen
repl
i
edaf ew.Herphonerangthenshesmil
ed.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Unbl
ockmewena!
”
Shesoft
lyl
aughed.“
Rraweh,
pleasegot
oyour
wif
e.”
“
Kant
ewar
eng?
”
“Gotoyourwi
feandl
eav
emeal
one.Idon’
twantt
o
besued.”
“
Don’
tdot
hat
.”
“
Stayawayf
rom me.Youar
emar
ri
ed.
”
“
Iam goi
ngt
ocat
chy
out
oni
ght
.”
Shelaughed.“
Iam goi
ngt
ot el
lmysist
ergoreyou
arebother
ingme.Wearepract
ical
l
yafamily
.”
“Iam notyourf
amil
y.Iwi
l
lseey
out
oni
ght
.Wi
feywi
l
l
probabl
yleaveear
ly”
“Stopt
his.Youaresupposedt
obemybr
other
,you
aremybr ot
her.
”
“
Otl
aswabaMi
a.”
Shesmil
ed.“Stopbother i
ngme.Ihav eaboy f
ri
end
andheismydat etonight.Ican’
twaittospendsome
al
oneti
mewi thhimt onight.Ri
dethatdickl
ikeIam
pai
dforit
.”
“
Iwi
l
lfucksomeoneup.
”
“How?Don’
tfor
gety
ouar
emar
ri
edMr
.Mot
samai
.
Bye!
”
Shehungupsmili
ng.Anot
hercal
lcamethrough,
she
l
ookedatherscr
eenandpickedherboy
fri
end’
scall
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey,Iam sendi
ngy ousomemoneysoy oucanget
adr
essforthelaunchtoni
ght
.IsP7000enough?
”
“
Yes.
”Shesmi
l
ed.“
Thanky
oubabe.
”
“
Iwi
l
lpi
cky
ouupatwhatt
ime?
”
“
6.”
“
Ok,
seey
out
hen.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Sheputdownherphoneandstart
edwor
king.An
hourl
atersheanswer
edherphone.
“
Stopcal
l
ingmeMr
.Mar
ri
edman.
”
“Iam attheunder
groundpar
king,
Iwantt
ogi
vey
ou
somet hi
ng.”
“Theonl
ythi
ngIwil
laccepti
smoneyandy oucan
alway
sdoabankt r
ansfer
.Othert
hanthat
,Idon’
t
wantit
.Andshoul
dn’ty
oubei nKasaneor
somethi
ng?”
“
Come.Iwi
l
ldot
hemoneyt
ransf
er.
”
Miast
oodupandwal kedout
.Shegoti
ntheli
ft
goi
ngtot
heundergr
oundpar ki
ngwher
eshenoticed
hi
scarwi
thti
ntedwindows.Shewal
kedoverandgot
i
nasthemoneyreportedt
oherphone.
“
Wil
lthatbeenough?
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Yes.
”
Hisphoner angt henhetookitoutandl ookedathi s
wife’
scal l
.Mi acli
mbedoverasheadj ustedhi sseat
thenshepul ledherpanti
estot hesidetaki ngouthis
dick.Sheheldi tandsankonitwhi l
ehegasped
putti
nghi shandsonherwai st.Shestartedr idi
ng
him, quenchinghermusclesaroundhi sdi ckwhi l
e
givi
ngi ttohim good.Awhilel
at erhegrunt ed
squeezi ngherwaistthenfr
ozedeepi nherf i
lli
ngher
upwi thhisthickcum.
Shel
eanedoverandki
ssedhimthensher
eachedf
or
hi
swall
etandtookhi
sblackcar
d.
“
What
’st
hepi
n?”
“
4567.
”
“
Thankyoudaddy!Whatt
imearey
oucomi ngback
f
rom Maunbytheway?Wifeyi
swait
ingf
oryou.”
Heki
ssedher
.“Don’
tov
erspend.
”
Shelethim sli
deoutt henwentbackonthe
passengerseatwher eshetookoffherg-
str
ingand
wipedherselfwiththem.Shethrewitonhi
sf ace
steppi
ngouthol dinghiscar
d.
“
Iam goi
ngt
ospendal
lofi
tMr
.Mot
samai
.By
e!”

*
**

Lat
ert
hatdayEsif
ini
shedhermake-
upasSean
wal
kedin.Hel
ookedathert
hrought
hemir
ror.
“
Canwet
alk?
”
Sheappl
i
edherl
i
pst
ickt
hengotupandl
ookedat
hi
m.
“
Whati
sit
?”
“
Ilov
eyou.Ir
eal
lyl
oveyou.Buti
t’
stoomuchnow.
I
magineatmyageandIonlyhav
eonechi
ld.
”
“
Youmeanenengwanawagagowabobolet
e?(
You
meant
hechi
ldwhoisar
esul
tofwhor
ing?
)”
“Don’tcal
lmydaughterthat.Ify
ouhadgi venmea
chil
dandmar ri
edmel i
keIwant ed,thatwouldhave
neverhappenedandIdon’tr egr
ether.Iam get
ti
ng
tooold.Iwantanot
herchildandIwantt oget
married.
”
“
Whenwef
ir
stmetIt
oldy
out
hatIdi
dn’
t-
“
“WhenIf
irstmetyou,y
ouwer eheartbr
okenandsad,
howmanyy earssi
ncethat
?Youar ebeingunf
airon
me.Ihav
enev erbeenmarri
edbefore.
”
“
Whydoy ouwantt
ogetmarri
ed?Wear
efi
ne,
aren’
t
wehappy
?Marri
agerui
nst
hings.
”
“
Iwantachi
l
dtooEsi
.”
“
Iti
edmyt
ubes.
”
“
Wow!
”
“
Ilongdi
d.”
“
Whataboutme?Whatam Isupposedt
odonow?
”
“
Youhav
eyourdaught
er.
”
“WhoIcan’
tev
enseepr
oper
lybecausey
ouhat
e
her
.”
“Ij
or r
a!Youwantt oargue.Iam noti
nthemoodf
or
that.IhavetoattendKenny’spart
yandIwon’
t
attenditupsetbecauseofy ou.
”
Seanwal
kedtothebat
hroom andcameoutseconds
l
atert
henchanged.
“
Aren’
tyoucomi
ngwi
thme?Yoursui
tisont
hebed.
”
“
Goal
one.Ihav
esomewher
etobe.
”
“
Areyoucheat
ing?I
fyouar
eIam goi
ngt
oleav
e
y
ou.”
Hei
gnoredherandwal
kedoutasshet
ear
ful
l
y
wat
ched.

*
**

Seangoti
nhi
scarcal
l
ingsomeone.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Hey,
Iam comi
ngov
er.I
sther
eany
thi
ngy
ouguy
s
need?”
“
No,
wear
egood.Wi
l
lyoubest
ayi
ng?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Iwi
l
ldi
shf
ory
out
hen.
”
“
Ok.
”
“Seanwhycan’
twerai
seourdaughtert
oget
her
?I
don’tev
enknowwhyyouarewiththatwoman.
”
Hesmi
l
ed.“Ispoket
omyuncles.Soonyourpar
ents
wi
ll
berecei
vi
ngaword.ButIwantasecondchi
ld.
”
Shel
aughed.“
Hur
ryupl
et’
smakehi
m.”
Seansmi
l
edt
henr
ever
sedanddr
oveof
f.

*
**

Attheair
port
,Kennywait
edforRona.Herphone
rangthenshetooki
toutandlookedatRonacal
li
ng.
“
Babe,
Iam al
readyatt
heai
rpor
t.
”
“Iam st
il
li
nKasanest
ucki
nameet i
ng.At
sil
eist
he
onewhomanagedt ocomeback.
”
“
Soy
ouar
enotgoi
ngt
omakei
t?”
“
Iam sorr
ybabebuty
ouknowhowmucht
hisi
s
i
mportant
.”
Kennysi
ghedast
ear
sfi
l
ledherey
es.
“
Iam r
eal
l
yhur
tanddi
sappoi
ntedbuti
t’
sok.Do
whaty
oumust
.”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Kennywal kedoutoft
heai rpor
tmorethanjust
di
sappointedbutheartbroken.Sheputherhandsin
herpockettotakeouthercarkey st
henfrownednot
fi
ndi
ngt hen.Pani
cked,shequicklyt
urnedonlyto
bumpint oNate.
“
Hey
,looki
ngf
ort
his?
”
Hehel
duphercarkey
s.Shel
aughedbot
hwi
thr
eli
ef
andsurpr
iset
oseehim.God,andwashelooking
good!Hehadalway
slookedgood…Kennystepped
back.
“
Hi…”
“Kenny
…al waysapleasur
emeet
ingy
ou.
”Hel
ooked
atherri
ng.“Marr
ied?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Tot
hatcr
azyguy
?”
Shel
aughed.“
Don’
tcal
lmyhusbandt
hat
.Andy
ou?
Marr
ied?
”
“
Mxm.
”
“
Whatdi
dyoudo?
”
Nat
esmil
ed.“Iam actual
lyafai
thf
ulmanwhenIam
i
narel
ati
onship.Iam si
ngle,
mywi f
epassedon.
”
“
Oh…Iam sosor
ry.
”
Hesmiled,abi
tofsadnessref
lect
ingi
nhiseyes.
“I
t’
sok.Threeyear
sback.Iam goodnow.Look,we
shoul
dcatchupsometime.”
“
Myhusba-
“
Hegotclosertoherputti
nghishandsonherwai
st
andsmiled.“Don’
tinvol
vethatcr
azyguyi
nour
conv
ersations.Whereishe?”
“
Kasaneonabusi
nesst
ri
p.”
“
Ok,
let
’shav
edi
nnert
hen.
”
“
Iwi
l
lbel
aunchi
nganot
herpar
tofmycompany
.”
“
Youownacompany
?”
“Yes.KennyEventsandTravel
,thet
rav
elsi
dei
snew,
Iam offi
cial
l
ylaunchi
ngit
.”
“
Wow,
smar
t!
”
“
Thanks.
”
“Iwi
ll
comeasaguest .
”Heleanedmuchcloser
.
Kennytur
nedherhead.Nat
eletgol
aughi
ng.
“
Toni
ghti
tis,
byeKenny
.”
“
Don’
tcome…”
Helaughedhandi
nghert
hecarkey
sandwal
ked
away..
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#109

Kennyputonherev eninggownt henherneckl

ace.
Stari
ngatherselfonthemirr
or,shefel
ttearsf
il
lher
eyes.Shepressedherlipsf
oramomentbutst i
ll
tear
sr ol
l
eddownhercheeksr ui
ninghermake-up.
Shereachedforherphoneandcal ledRona.
“
Babe?
”
“Whyareyoudoi
ngthisner
ra?AllIaskisali
ttl
e
suppor
tli
keIal
wayssupportyou.Itf
eel
slikeIam
al
oneinthi
smarri
age.Whoarey ouwiththere?
”
“
Kenny
-“
Mor etearsroll
eddownhercheeks.“
Younevergo
mor ethantwoday swit
houtaski
ngforsexbutthese
daysebiledibekediawel
a.Whatam Iwrongbabe?
Pleasetellme, l
etmefi
xtheprobl
em.Ilov
ey ou
Rona,gaot alogany
eeng?”
“
Iam notcheat
ing.
”
“
Thenwher
ear
eyouwhenIneedy
out
obebymy
si
de?
”
“
BabeIexplai
nedmy sel
f.Thesewhit
efolksneed
moreconvi
ncing.Iam doingthi
sforus.Look,Ihav
e
t
ogo.Iwil
lcallyou.”
“
RonaIam st
il
ltal
ki
ng-
“
Hedroppedthecall
.Kennytookadeepbreat
hbut
shefoundhersel
fattheedge.Shet
ookherphone
andcall
edNolo.
“
Lov
e…”
“
Ronai
scheat
ing.
”
“
What
?”
“
Hei
scheat
ing.
”
“
Whatmakesy
ousayt
hat
?”
“Ronaisnotthetypet oj ustgoforov ertwoweeks
asabatesex.( wi
thoutwant i
ngsex. )
Thismanl oves
sexsomuch, bebreathesi nsex.Hedoesn’ tgettir
ed.
Heisaddicted.Henev ergetsenoughbutt heseday s
hecangoaweekort wowi thoutsex.Thesexi s
alwayshurri
edwhenwedohav eit.I
fheisnot
gett
ingitathome, thenhei sget t
ingitoutther
e.”
“Ok,t
akeadeepbreat
hfri
end.Ar
eyousurehei
s
cheat
ing?KanaRonal
ovesyou.Youknowhedoes.
”
“Tshenol
oRonaisnotget
ti
ngsexf
rom me.Iam not
givi
ngthatmansex.Whoisgi
vi
nghimthen?
”
“
Cany
out
rusty
ourman?
”
“
Iam t
ell
i
ngy
out
hathei
scheat
ingTshenol
o.”
“Mathataagagokegoreosetseoipol
elet
segor e
Ronawagocheat aebil
egaobategoretsa.(
Your
probl
em isthaty
ouhavealr
eadyconvi
ncedy oursel
f
thatRonaischeati
ngandyoudon’
twantt ol
isten.
)”
Kennyl
ookeddown,
tear
sinherey
es.
“
Iam scar
ed.
”
“Whyareyouscar ed?Kant eRonaony et
semang
Keneil
we?(Whodi dRonamar ryKenei
lwe?)Youare
hi
swi f
e,l
esagot sogat soga.(st
opgetti
ngscared.
)
Wenaeketle.(
Justr el
ax.)Youcan’tbecryi
ng
becauseyouthinkheischeat i
ng.”
“
Iwantt
ogot
oKasane.
”
“Ngng,obat
angkoKasane?(Whatdoyouwanti
n
Kasane?
)Canyouj
ustr
elax?Rel
ax,Ronai
syourman
andthatr
ingonyourfi
ngersay
sal ot
.Imagi
neyou
gettoKasaneandyoufi
ndhim al
one.Whatwil
lyou
dothen?”
“
Youdon’
tunder
standTshenol
o.Iknowmymanand
-
“
“Andy oushouldt
rusthim.Whatifi
t’
sworkstress?
Wer en’
tyoutheonewhowassay i
ngworkisal ot
thesedays?Don’tbequicktomakeconcl
usions.If
youwantt oconfr
ont,confr
onthi
m onceyouhav e
evidencethathei
scheat i
ng.
”
“Heisgoi
ngtomissmypart
ytoni
ght.Hesayshei
s
stucki
nKasaneand…Iam r
eal
lyhear
tbr
oken.
”
“Iknowbutdon’
tletthi
smakey oustar
tthi
nkingthat
may behei
scheating.Ronal
ovesyou.Helovesy ou
only.Hi
shear
tbelongstoyouandy ouknowit.”
“Il
ovehimtoo.Ijusthav
eaf eeli
ngthathei
s
cheat
ingbutifheisnotthenit
’sall
inmyhead.Iam
suret
hefeeli
ngwi l
lgoaway .
”
“See?Any
way s,
Iam al
readyonmywaytoKenny
EventManagement
,shouldIcomeandpi
ckyouup?
”
“
No.Iwi
l
lbr
ingmy
sel
f.Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ng.
”
“
Iwi
l
lal
way
sbet
her
e.”
“
Bye.
”
Shehung,t
heconv
ersati
onhadn’thel
pedonebi
t.
Shetookadeepbr
eathandpickedamake-upbr
ush
thenst
art
edfi
xi
ngherface.
Herphoner
ang,
shet
ooki
tthensmi
l
edatt
hev
ideo
cal
l.
“
Hey
…”
“
Myl
ady
,war
eng?
”
Kennysmil
edstar
ingathi
m ont
hescr
een.“
Ihope
youarebehav
ingQ.”
“
Ahhmama,
Iam al
way
sbehav
ing.
”
“
Whatdoy
ouwant
?”
Helaughed, Kennyfoundhersel
fsmil
ing,
helaughed
l
ikehisfather.“
Nothing.Ij
ustcal
ledt
ocheckupon
you,y
oul ookbeautiful
.”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Thanks.
”
“IwishIwer
ether
etocel
ebr
atewi
thyoubutIwi
l
l
celebr
atewi
thyouwhenwecomeback.
”
“
Thanks.
”
“
Byt
heway
,cany
our
echar
gemyphone?
”
“
Iknewi
t!
”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Please…”
“
Whatdoy
ouwantt
odo?
”
“
TheWi
Fit
hissi
desucks.
”
“
Ok,
Iwi
l
ldoi
tnow.
”
“
Thanks.Il
ovey
ousomuchmmagweQ.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
“
Arey
ouok?
”
“
Justner
vous.
”
“
Don’
tbe.You’
vegott
hismom.
”
“
Ok.By
e.”
“
Bye.
”
Shehungupandboughthi
m ai
rt
imet
hroughher
bankthencont
inuedf
ixi
ngherface.Shef
inal
l
y
stoodupandwalkedoutofherroom.

*
**

Atthelaunch,
Esiwalkedi
nandsmil
edrecei
vi
nga
glassofchampagne.Shel
ookedatt
hesetup,God
thesepeoplewer
egoodatwhattheydi
d.
“
Hey
…”
Sher
aisedherheadandl
ookedatMaat
la.“
Hey
,you
l
ookgood.”
“
Thanks.Yout
oo.
”
Theywal
kedt
oget
hersmi
l
ing.
“
Thi
sisbeaut
if
ul.
”
Esi
nodded.“
Tell
meaboutit
.Li
tt
lesi
sisdoi
ng
wonder
s.WhereisRona?
”
“
Hesai
dhecoul
dn’
tcome.
”
Esi
frowned.“
What
?”
“
Hei
sst
il
li
nameet
ing.
”
“Ican’
tbel
i
evehei
sgoi
ngt
omi
sst
hisdayoutofal
l
days.”
“
LennaIdon’
tknowhowhi
smi
ndwor
ksatt
imes.
”
“
Kennymustbedi
sappoi
nted.
”
“Yah,any
ways,Ispoket
oKago,hesay
shewi
l
lbe
comingbackforhishol
i
day
s.”
Esi
smi
l
ed.“
Real
l
y?”
“Yes,
hesay syouwer
ecr
yingont
hephone
complai
ning.”
“Ihav
en’tseenhiminayearnow.Imi
sshi
m.Iam
sureevenLethabodoes.
”
“
Hedoes.
”
“
Howi
sSapphi
re?
”
“Iam deal
i
ngwi
thmoodswi
ngs,
gomaswe.(
It
’s
bad.)
”
Shelaughed.“That
’showt
eenager
sar
e,atl
easty
ou
haveNamet so.”
Maatl
alookedatherthensmi l
ed.“Ev erbeenwith
someonebutitj
ustdoesn’tfeell
ikelov e?That’
show
i
tfeel
s.Myheartisel
sewhere.Shewant stoget
marri
ed,shegav
emeanul ti
mat um, eit
herImar r
y
herorsheisgoi
ngtoleave.Iwantt obutmyhear ti
s
marri
edtosomeoneel se.
”
Esilookedathim.Maatlal
ookedinhereyesthenher
l
ips.Heslowlyleanedovertoki
ssher,
theirl
i
ps
touched.Esi
’sphonerangthenshemov edbackwith
asmi l
e.
“
Sorr
y,Ihav
etotaket
his.
”Sheansweredt
hecal
l
whi
l
eMaat l
astar
edatherwit
hsmile.

Apr
ilsmi
l
edasshewal
kedi
nwi
thAt
sil
e.
“
Wow!
”
Theyr
eceiv
edtheirdr
inks,Apr
ill
ookedatt
he
champagneasAtsil
elookedaround.
“
Babe,
getmej
uice.
”
Hel
ookedather
.“Ok.
”
Hewal
kedawayasPeoappr
oachedheri
nadr
ess.
“
Hey
…”
Apr
ilsmi
l
ed.“
Hi,
howar
eyou?
”
“
Idi
dn’
tseet
hatt
hel
astt
ime.Congr
atul
ati
ons!
”
“
Iam f
ourmont
hs.
”
Kennywal
kedinwi
thMi
athent
heyal
lcl
apped
handsf
orher
.
“
Am It
heonl
yonewhodoesn’
tli
ket
hisgi
rl
?”
Aprill
ookedatPeoandlaughed.“IthoughtIwast
he
onlyone.Kanasheisalwaysfl
ir
ti
ng, evenwit
hbo
Atsil
ethoughthat
’sherbrot
heri
n-law.”
“
Kennyshoul
dbecar
eful
.Shei
sthet
ypet
osl
eep
wi
thyourman.”
“
Tel
lmeabouti
t.
”
Kennywalkedov
ert
othem.“
Heyguy
s,t
hanky
ouf
or
coming.
”
“
Nopr
obl
em.Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Thanks.Yout
oo,
congr
atul
ati
onsApr
il
.”
“
Thanks.
”
At
sil
ewal
kedov
erwi
thApr
il
’sj
uice.
“
Ther
eyougobabe.
”
“
Thanks.
”
“
HeyKenny
…”
Kennyt ookhishandandpull
edhim aside.“Hey…
youshoul dn’
thavel
eftRonatodealwiththosemen
alone,kanamay bei
fyoutwower etogetherthen
may bey outwowouldhavefi
nishedearli
er.
”
At
sil
esmi
l
ed.“
Yah,
lennaIr
egr
etl
eav
inghi
m al
one.
”
“IhopeRona’
sPAhadbookedyout
woi
ntoagood
hotelwhi
choff
ersgoodf
ood.
”
“
Itwasal
odge.
”
“
Whi
chone?Idi
dn’
tli
ket
heoneweoncewentt
o.”
Kennysmi
l
edashet
oldhert
henameoft
hel
odge.
“
Ok…any
way
sletmegi
vemyspeech.
”
Shewalkedtothef
rontastheMCi nt
roducedher
.
Shetookadeepbreathst
aringatt
hecrowd
expect
ingtoseehi
m.
“Firstl
y ,Iwouldliketot
hankal lt
hosewhohav e
takent hei
rtimet ocomeher eandof fi
cial
lyopenour
travel andtour scompanywhi chwillbeinthissame
buildingwi thKenny ’
sEventManagement .Wenow
call i
tKennyEbentandTr avelManagement .
”She
cont i
nuedwi thherspeechandspokef oracoupl eof
mi nutest henf i
nall
ygotoffstage.Esiwalkedov er
andhuggedher .
“
Youdi
dit
!”
“
Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ng.Wher
eisSean?
”
“
Wehadal
i
ttl
ear
gument
.”
Kennynodded.“
Ok,
wewi
l
ltal
kabouti
t.Letmesay
hit
oNolo.”
“
Ok.
”
Kennywal
kedov
ert
oNol
o.“
Hey
…”
Nol
osmi
l
ed.“
Bossl
ady
!”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ngal
ltheway
fr
om Maun.”
“
It
’sok.Ar
eyouok?
”
“
Yes.Iam goi
ngt
oKasane.
”
“
Ke-
“
“
Iam going.MyPAalr
eadybookedmyfl
i
ghtt i
cket
.
I
nabout3hr s30mi
nutes,
Iwouldhav
earr
ived.Iam
f
lyi
ngthere.
”
“
Ihopey
oudon’
tregr
ett
his.
”
“
Bye.Don’
ttel
lany
one.
”
“
Ok.
”
Kennysecr
etl
ylef
tthengoti
nhercarandchanged
i
ntoajeanandat-shi
rt
.Shestar
tedt
hecarand
drov
etotheair
port.

*
**

InKasanehourslater
,Kennysteppedoutofthecab
thenbendedandt i
ghtenedhershoel
aces.She
walkedinsi
dethelodgeholdi
ngherhandbagand
smiledatthef
rontdesk.
“
Hi,
howar
eyou?
”
“
Hi.
”
“Uhh…”Shetookoutasmal lboxfrom herhandbag
smili
ng.“Myhusbandhasbeenst uckherefortwo
days,busi
nesstri
p.It
’souranni
versar
ytonightand
thi
smandoesn’ tknowIam coming.It’
sasur pr
ise.
”
Thel
adysmi
l
ed.“
Awww…t
hisi
scut
e.”
“Ij
ustwanttosurpri
sehim.Hisnamei sAr
ona
Motsamai.Iknowy ouar
enotal l
owedtodothis
but…”ShetookoutherIDthatshowedherful
l
names.“CanIpleasehavehisroom numbersoIcan
giv
ehimt hesurpr
ise.
”
“
Eish…wear
e-“
Kennytookoutacoupl
eofhundr
edsandgav
ethem
toher
.“KeP2K.”
Therecept
ioni
stcount
edthemoneythenchecked
onthecomputeranddir
ectedhert
otheroom.
“
Thanksl
ove.
”
Shewalkedt
ot heroom, herhear
tpoundi
ngsomuch.
Shestoodbythedoort r
yingtogetany
thi
ngwithher
earpr
essedagainstthedoorbutshecouldn’
thear
any
thi
ng.Shesof
tl
yknocked.
Ronaopenedthedoor
,atowelwrappedar
oundhi
s
l
owerbody.Kennyl
ookedatthepanici
nhisey
es.
“
Hey
…sur
pri
se!
”
“
Uh…”
Shechuckl
ed.“
Letmei
n.”
”
“
Babe?
!Ar
en’
tyousupposedt
obe…”
“
CanIpl
easegeti
n?Iam t
ir
ed.
”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#110

Ronast oodbythedoorst ar
ingather .Kennypushed
him offandwalkin.Shelookedatt heempt yroom.
Ronal ookedatherasshewal kedar ound,she
openedt hewardrobesthenkneltdownandchecked
underneaththebed.Shewentt othebat hroom and
l
ookedatt hetubf i
l
ledwithwater.Herey esfellon
theglassofwineandt hebottl
eitself.Shepicked
them bothupandwal kedoutwi t
ht hem.
“
Soy
out
akel
ongbat
hsal
lal
one?
”
“
Iam ti
red.IhadalongdaysoIthoughtIwouldt
reat
mysel
ftoal ongbat
h.Ist
heresomethingwrongwith
t
hat?”
“Thefemal
eperf
umeIam smell
i
ngi
nthi
sroom i
s
ever
ythi
ngwrongwi
thi
tArona!
”
“
Idon’
tsmel
li
t.Youar
esmel
l
ingt
hings.
”
“
Iam notsmel
l
ingt
hingsAr
ona,
Iam notcr
azy
!”
Sheputt
hebot
tl
edownandwal
kedt
othegl
ass
sli
dingdoorthatledt
other
iverv
iew.Shel
ookedat
thefloorandlookedatt
hewetfl
oor.
“
Andt
his?
”
“
Iwentout
sideandcameback.
”
Kennylookedathi
mtear
ful
l
y.“
Iam notst
upi
d
Arona.
”
“
Whatar
eyout
alki
ngabout
?”
“
Iknowt
her
ewasawomanher
e.”
“
Therewasnoone.Justme.Youarebei
ngcrazy
r
ightnow.I
sthi
sbecauseIcoul
dn’
tmakeitf
oryour
l
aunch?”
“Youar
echeat
ing!Iam notst
upi
d.Ther
ewas
someonei
nhere.”
“Yousoundcrazyri
ghtnowbabe.Idon’tknowwhy
youjustcan’
ttr
ustme.Youdon’thavetoaccuseme
everyti
me.Ihavenevergi
venyouar easontothinkI
am cheati
ngbecauseIam notcheati
ng.Ilov
ey ou,
whatdoIhav etodotoshowy outhatIlov
ey ou
only
? ”
Herl
i
pst
rembl
ed.“
Noonesai
dyoudon’
tlov
eme
onl
y,Isai
dther
ewasanot
herwomanher
e.”
“
Ther
ewasnooneher
eexpectme.Ther
eisnoone.
”
Shelookedathimt r
yingtoholdi
tinbutpain
weakenedherasshel ookedathim.Shehad
promisedhersel
fshewoul dn’
tcr
ybutstari
ngathim
l
ietoherbrokeher.Sheputherhandsov erherf
ace
cr
y i
ng.Hehuggedher .
“
Babe,
Iam notcheat
ingony
ou.Ipr
omi
se.
”
“
Youar
ely
ing!
”
“
Cany
out
rustme?Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Youar
ehur
ti
ngmeRona.Whyar
eyoudoi
ngt
hist
o
me?
”
“Kanait
’sal
linyourhead.It’
sonlymeher e.Iwi sh
theywerecamerassoy oucansee.Ebi leIjustgot
backanhourback.Thosear emycl ot
hes.
”He
point
edatthechair
.“Iputthem there.Youcansmel l
them.”Hetookhisphone.“Takemyphone.Iwasn’ t
expecti
ngyousoev eryt
hingisthere.Youcancheck.
Ihavenothi
ngtohidetoy ou.Ihavebeenf aithf
ul,I
vowedt obefai
thf
ul.Ihaveringon…”Her aisedhis
handshowi ngher.“
Iwouldnev ercheatony ouwith
thi
sringonmyf i
nger.Ir
espectyousomuch.You
givemeev eryt
hingImayev erneed,youar eperf
ect
andIhav enoreasont ocheatbecausey ougiveme
every
thing.Andmay betheperfumei sthis.
”
Hewalkedov ertohi
sthingsandt ookoutaboxof
perf
ume.“Iboughtthi
stoday .Ihavethereceiptwi
th
me.May beyoucant r
ustmeal i
ttl
ebitbabe.You
don’
thavetol ookf
oranyf aul
tseveryti
me. ”
Shel
ookedathi
m ashewi
pedawayhert
ear
s.
“Il
oveyou.Thatwi
ll
nev
erchange,
bel
i
eveme.You
aretheonl
yone.”
Shel
ookedathim unablet
oshaket hefeel
ingthat
hewaslyi
ng.Thi
swasexact l
yhowshef el
tthenight
shef
oundhim wit
hKay .Hergrandmotherhad
al
waystol
dherinsti
nctwasherst r
ongestpill
arshe
hadt
oleanonmostoft hetime.
“
Ilov
eyou.Iam notcheat
ing.
”
Kennyl
ookedar
oundt
her
oom agai
nthensi
ghed.
“
Ok.
”
Hesmil
ed.“
Howwasy
ourl
aunch?Iam sor
ryI
coul
dn’
tmakei
t.
”
“I
twasfine.”Shetookof fhershoest hensocks.She
l
ookedupt akingoffhert-shi
rtandbr athenher
j
eansincludingthethong.Sher eachedforhistowel
anddr
oppedi t
.
“Imissyou.I
t’
sbeenawhi l
e.Iam sur
eyouar
eal
so
sexual
lyfr
ustr
ated.I
t’
sbeenawhile.”
“
Iam t
ir
edbabe.
”
“
Iam nott
ir
ed.Youdon’
thav
etodoany
thi
ng.Iwi
l
l
r
idey
ou.”
Shepushedhi mt othebedt hengotont opofhim
givi
nghi m ahandj ob.Sheleanedov erandstart
ed
suckinghisdickasi tgothard.Shepausedand
l
ookedati tallerect,i
tneverreall
yfail
edhim.She
helditandslowl ysatonitlett
inghim sinkal
lthe
waydeepi nher .Shef r
ownedt hentookadeep
breathandstar t
edr i
dinghim.Ronagr untedstar
ing
atherridehisdickwhi leherbreastbounced.She
mov edherwai sttakinghim alli
nmoani ng.
“
Fuck.
.sl
owdown…”
Shekeptmov i
ngi gnoringhispl
eas.Heheldher
waistandst ar
tedt hrusti
ngfrom beneat
hasi tgot
toogood, herpussyal waystestedsweet.Their
bodiesslappedagai nsteachotherthenashewas
aboutt ocum, shegotof fandfini
shedhim offwit
ha
handj ob.Hegr oanedr el
easi
nghiscum.Shel ooked
atitthenlookedi nhiseyes.
“I
t’
salway salotwhenwet akef
ourdayswit
hout
fucki
ng.Didyouserviceyour
sel
fbefor
eIcame?You
didri
ght.Thatwil
lexplai
nwhyyourcum i
ssoli
tt
le.
”
“
Yeah…”
Kennysmil
edthenwi
pedhi
m of
fwi
thhi
stowel
.“I
t’
s
ok.It
rusty
ou.
”
Shegotupandwentt ot
hebathroom thencameout
minut
eslat
erholdingahairbandandg- st
ri
ng.She
gavet
heg-str
ingincludi
ngthehairbandtohim wi
th
asmil
e.
“Ithi
nkthewomanwhowasstayi
nginher
eforgot
them.Youneedtogi
vet
hem backtothel
odge
staff
.”
Henoddedt
aki
ngt
hem.“
Yeah.
”
Shegoti
nbed.“
Comel
et’
ssl
eep.
”
Heputdownt heg-st
ri
ngandt
hehai
rbandl
ooki
ng
athersuspi
ciousl
y.“
Uhok.
”
Hegoti
nbedwi
thher
.Kennyl
ookedather
.
“Il
ovey ou.Iknowy oubettert hananyone.Youar e
l
ikemyson, samewayIknowQi sthesamewayI
knowy oubabe.Youcan’ tlietomeev enifyout r
y.I
knowy ouar egoodatl y
ing,trustme, Iknowy oucan
coverupy ourmi stakeswi thagoodl i
e.ButIknow
you.Iam goi ngtodr opthisissue.Youknowwhat
youdidandIf orgi
vey oubecauseIl oveyou.Iam
for
givi
ngy ouj ustbecauseIl ov eyou.Iknowy oulove
met oo,itprobablymeansnot hingbecausei fitdi
d,
youwoul dhav eleftmeal readyandnot hi
ngis
holdi
ngy oubackf rom leav i
ngme. ”
“
Babe-
“
Shekissedhi
m.“Shh…Iam try
ingtoshowyouthat
for
givenessi
simportanti
nmarri
age.Wedon’tl
eave
becauseofcheat
ing.Onedaytoowhenit
’syourtur
n
tofor
giveme,Ihopey oudoj
ustthat
.”
“
Whatar
e-“
“
Goodni
ghtbabe.Il
ovey
ou.
”
Sherest
edherheadonhi
schestandcl
osedher
eyesrel
axi
ng.

*
**

Miaslowlyopenedherey estoherphoneri
ngingt
he
fol
l
owi ngmorning.Shereachedfori
tasher
boyfr
iendpul
ledhercloserkissi
ngherneck.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Opent
hedoor
,Iam out
side.
”
Shesl
owl ygotuphangi
ngupandkissedhim.“
Uh,
mybrotherin-
lawi
soutsi
de.Letmetalkt
ohim.St
ay
her
e.”
“
Ok.
”
Shequi ckl
ywenttothebathr
oom andtookaquick
showert henf
inal
l
ywal kedouti
nhershortni
ght
dress.Sheopenedthedoorandwalkedoutfoldi
ng
herarms.
“
Iam sl
eepi
ng.I
t’
s4!
”
“
Who’
scari
sthi
s?”
“
Myboy
fri
end’
s!Whoel
se?
”
“
Yourboy
fri
enddoesn’
tdr
ivet
hiscar
.”
“Hei
sveryf
inanci
all
yst
abl
ehecanaf
for
dmor
ethan
onecar
.”
“
Didy
ousl
eepwi
thhi
m?”
“
Didy
ousl
eepwi
thy
ourwi
fe?
”
“
Whatel
sedoy
ouwant
?Am Inotdoi
ngev
ery
thi
ng
f
ory
ou?”
“
Iwantt
ogetmar
ri
ed.
”
“
Isai
dgi
vemet
ime.
”
“Got oy ourwif
e,mymani sinsi
de.I fyoucauseany
tr
oubl eIwillj
ustt
ellyourbrothert hatyouare
botheringme.Iwantaser i
ousr elati
onship.Iwantto
haveki ds.Iwanttobef uckedev erymor ni
ngwi t
ha
mor ni
nger ecti
onandl ethim gr
unti nmyear
knowi ngthatthedickisonlymi ne.Allthi
sisexciti
ng
butint helongrunitwon’tbebecauseIknowy ou
wi
l
lgobackt
oyourwi
fe.
”
“
Shei
spr
egnant
!Idon’
twantt
oleav
eherwhi
l
e-“
“Behonestwit
hyoursel
f.Youdon’twanttoever
l
eaveherbecauseyouloveher.That’
sok.Justst
ay
awayfrom-“
Hepickedherupandplacedheronthedashboar
d
theburi
edhisfacebet
weenherlegseati
ngher
pussy.Miacur
ledhert
oesashemuf fedhersogood.
“
AwwwAt
sil
e…ahh…mhmmm…”
Shemoanedabi tl
ouderspasmi
ng.Her
aisedhi
s
headthentookouthisdi
ckandr
ubbedi
tonher
pussythen#removed.
.
At
sil
esl
i
doutt
henki
ssedher
.
“Pl
easebreakupwithhim.Idon’
twantt
oshar
eyou.
Iwil
lgety
out hecaryouwant.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
When?
”
“
Today
.Itwi
l
lbedel
i
ver
edi
naf
ewday
s.”
“
Ok.Buti
fyoudon’
tgett
hecart
henIam goi
ngt
o
cuty
ouof
f.
”
“
Ok,
Ilov
eyou.
”
Shesmiledthenkissedhi
m andwalkedbacki
nside
thehouse.Atsi
l
egoti nhi
scaranddrovehome
passi
ngbyengi newherehegotApr
il’
schocol
ates.

*
**

Esisati
nthesit
ti
ngroom lookingattheti
me, hehad
beengonethewholenight.Sheswallowedthent ook
herphoneandtri
edhisnumberagai n.I
tranglikeit
hadbeendoingti
lli
tstopped.Shesighedthencal l
ed
Kenny.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Seani
scheat
ing.
”
“It
oldy
oudidn’
tI?Seani
soneoft hegoodguysbutI
guessyoudon’
twanttoseei
t.SeanisnotMaatl
a.”
“
Inev
ersai
dhewas.
”
“
Thenwhyar
eyoupuni
shi
nghi
m?”
“
Isi
twr
ongt
onotwantt
ogetmar
ri
ed?
”
“Seanhasneverbeenmarri
edbef
ore.I
t’
sunfai
ron
him.Youaregoingtoendupsi
ngleIam t
ell
i
ngy ou.
”
“
Iam scar
edofbei
ngcheat
edon.
”
“I
fheisacheaterhewill
alwayscheatEsi
.Yougive
hi
m ever
ythi
ngy oucanpossibl
ygiveandhewillst
il
l
cheat
.ButIdon’tt
hinkSeanisthatman.Youkeep
pushi
nghim away.”
Esi
sighed.“
Ilov
ehi
m.”
“
Look,
wewi
l
ltal
kwhenIgett
her
e.”
“
Wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
Kasane.Iam f
lyi
ngt
oMaunr
ightnow.
”
“
Wentt
oseehubby
?”
“
Yes.Hei
scheat
ing.
”
“
Rona?
”
“
YesandIhav
epr
oof
.”
“
Whatar
eyougoi
ngt
odonow?Wi
l
lyoul
eav
ehi
m?”
“
Forwhat
?Becausehedeci
dedt
odi
phi
sdi
cki
n
anot
herpussy?No.Iwoul dneverl
eavemymanfor
j
ustcheati
ngafteral
lwehav ebeenthroughmme
hel
aIwill
takeinthelessonshegives.
”
“
Twowr
ongsdon’
tmakear
ight
.”
“
Twowr
ongshasnev
ermadeanyr
ighthasi
t?”
“Hewill
kil
lyou.Bet
terl
eav
ewheny
ouknowy
ou
can’
tforgi
vehim.”
“If
orgivehi
m.Iam sureifhehassensehei sgoing
tostop.For
giv
enessisimpor t
anti
nmarriage.Iam
showinghimthatwecanf orgi
veeachotherfor
cheati
ngandmov eonwi thourmarri
agelikenothi
ng
happened.Iwil
lnev
erleaveRona.”
“
Idon’
tli
key
ourt
one.
”
“
That
’sok.
”
“
Menar
edi
ff
erentf
rom us.
”
“Idon’
tcare.Mmehel awhenIam donewithhi
m,I
am surewewi ll
nev erhavesuchissuesev
eragai
n.
Byelove,Iam gett
ingintheplane.”
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#111

Esi
stoodupasSeanwal
kedi
nsi
det
hehouse.
“
Wher
ear
eyoucomi
ngf
rom?
”
“
Iwasataf
ri
end’
shouse.
”
“
Whi
chf
ri
end?
”
“
Hewal
kedt
othebedr
oom.“
Youdon’
tknowhi
m.”
“
Arey
oucheat
ingi
nme?
”
“Idon’
thav
et i
mef
ort
hisMoesi
.Ihav
etogo
somewhere.”
Hel
ookedathi
m asheundressedthenhegotinsi
de
t
hebathr
oom.Shepati
entl
ywaitedforhi
mti
llhe
wal
kedoutdr
yinghi
mself
.
“Seancanwet al
k?Youwereright
.Iwasbei
ngunf
air
ony oubabe.Il
etmyhurtcont
rolme.Youar
enotmy
ex,youareyouandIwil
lmarryyou.”
Unmov
ed,
hedr
iedhi
msel
f.“
Whatmadey
ouchange
y
ourmi
nd?
”
“
Ilov
eyou.Idon’
twantt
olosey
ou.
”
Heloti
onedt
hendr
essedupi
nblackj
eans,bl
ack
bootsandabl
ackt
-shi
rt
.Hepi
ckedablackcap.
“
Isee.
”
“
Saysomet
hing.
”
Seanlookedather
.“Wewil
ltal
kwhenIgetback
l
ateron.Ireal
l
yhavetogo.
”
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
Hesi
ghed.“
Ilov
eyout
oo.By
e.”
“
Won’
tyouki
ssme?
”
Hel eanedoverandkissedher .Esiputherhandson
hischestkissi
nghim backt henhest eppedbackand
walkedout.Shesatont hebed,tearssti
ngingher
eyes.Itwasjusthowdi stanthehadbeen.I tdidn’
t
feelli
keherSeanatall.Sher ubbedherey esthen
dressedupf orworkandf inal
lywalkedout .
Herphoner
angasshegoti
nthecar
.“Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,di
dyouar
ri
vesaf
elyl
astni
ght
.Youwer
eabi
t
dr
unk.
”
“
YesIdi
dMaat
la.Thanks.
”
“
It
’sok.Iwaswor
ri
ed.
”
“
Iam good.
”
“Ok.Itwasgoodseei
ngy ouyesterdayandact
ual
l
y
havingsuchalongchatwit
hy ou.”
Moesi
smi
l
ed.“
Itdi
d.Ienj
oyedi
ttoo.
”
“Iwant
edt
odiscussLethabo’
sbir
thdaytoobutI
guesswewil
ldoitwhenwebot hgetti
me.”
“
Goodi
dea.
”
“
Okshar
p.”
“
Bye.
”
Hehungup,shest
art
edhercart
henr
ever
sedand
dr
oveoffheadedt
owork.

*
**

Att
hel
odge,
Ronat
ri
edKenny
’snumberdr
essi
ng
buti
twasn’
tgoi
ngt
hrough.Hesi
ghedt
hencal
l
ed
herof
fi
ce.
“Kenny’
sEventandTr
avel
Management
,howcanwe
helpyou?”
“
Hi,
youarespeaki
ngt
oMr
.Mot
samai
,connectme
t
omywife.”
“
Mrs.Motsamai
isnoty
eti
n.Youcanl
eav
ea
message.
”
“
Noi
t’
sok.
”
Hehungupandcal
l
edhi
sPA.
“
Sir
?”
“
Iwantyout
ogetf
lower
sformywif
e.Youknow
t
hoseoneswit
hmoneyi
nsi
derol
l
edoneachrose.
”
“
Yessi
r.
”
“
Theyshoul
dbi
gfl
ower
sabl
etohol
dal
otof
money
.”
“
Yessi
r.
”
“Al
sogetherapieceofavel
vetcake.Havei
t
del
iver
edatheroffi
cewi
thanote.Iwil
lsendyou
whatt
henot
eshoul
dsay
.”
“
Ok,
any
thi
ngel
se?
”
“Uhh…lett
hatbeaccompani
edbyagi
ftv
ouchert
oa
beaut
yspa.”
“
Yessi
r.
”
“
Agodspa.
”
“
Yessi
r.
”
“Ahhf
uck!
..
.uhhthat
’sal
l
.Iwi
l
lcal
lyoui
fIwantt
o
addmorethi
ngs.
”
“
Yessi
r.
”
Hehunguppi ckedhi
sthi
ngsthenwal
kedouty
et
agai
ntr
yinghernumberbutthenumberwasst
il
l
unav
ail
able.

*
**

Hour
slat
er,Kennywal
kedi
nsi
deKenny
’sEv entand
Tr
avelManagementi
nadari
ngbl
ackdress.She
smi
l
edatherwor
ker
sandgoti
nsi
det
hel
i
ft.
Shewalkedi
nherof
fi
cesteppi
ngoutoft
hel
i
ftand
satdownasherPAwalkedi
n.
“
Goodaf
ter
noonKenny
.”
“Hi
,thankyouforwhaty
oudi
dlastni
ght
.Onl
yyou
canpulli
toff
.”
Gont
lesmi
l
ed.“
Iwasj
ustdoi
ngmyj
ob.
”
“
Iwi
l
lgety
oul
unch.
”
“
Iwon’
tsaynot
ofr
eef
ood.Amanwasl
ooki
ngf
or
y
outhough.
”
“
Whatki
nd?
”
“
Hesai
dhi
snamei
sNat
eandhesai
dhewi
l
lcal
l
y
ou.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Ihav
eMr
s.Bogat
suont
hephonef
ory
ou.
”
“
Connecther
.”
Shewal
kedoutthensecondsl
aterKennywas
tal
ki
ngonthephone.
“
Mrs.Bogat
su…”
“Hi,Iwantedt
ospeakt oyoudi
rect
ly.Ihaveahuge
functi
onthati
scomi ngupandIneedy ourcompany
tobet heonetoorgani
zeit,
Ineedahugespaceand
Isawy ourgar
den.That’
sexactl
ywhatIneed.”
Kennysmi led.“Kenny’sEventandTravel
Managementwi l
lbehappyt oassi
styou.Our
companyi sf i
l
ledwi t
hnot hi
ngbutthebestpeopl
e
whowi l
l workv er
yhar dtogiveyouthebestyoucan
everget.Iam goi ngtoconnectyoutooneofour
tr
ustedwor kersandIpr omiseyou,shewill
bethere
tocaterforallyourneeds.”
“
Great
!”
Kennyhungupt
hencal
l
edi
nGont
le.“
Giv
ehert
o
Li
sa.”
“
Ok.
”
“
Andt
ell
Lisat
oputupt
hebestt
eam.
”
“
Ok.
”
Kennysi
ghedstari
ngatherl
aptop.Hereyesfel
lon
herweddi
ngpictur
eonthetabl
e,sheleanedbackon
hertablerecall
i
ngthatdayli
kei twastomor r
ow.She
hadr eall
ythoughtthei
rmarri
agewoul dmeanast op
tofunnygames.Shechuckl edast earsf
ill
edher
eyes.Thepai ninherhear
tcouldn’tcompareto
anythingandshewonder ediftheirmarr
iagewould
survi
v e.Oneofthedayshewoul dbri
ngherdiseases.
Sheshookherheadt hinki
ngaboutdivorcebutt
hat
wouldmeanhal fhercompanywoul dgot ohi
m.
Niggahadn’tcont
ri
butedonet hebeforhert
obe
whereshewas.Hedi dn’tdeserveadimeandneither
di
dshewantany t
hingfrom hi
scompanyt houghshe
wasalreadyashareholder.
Kenny
’sphoner
angt
henshepi
ckedt
heunsav
ed
number.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Soy oucamef
ory
ourl
aunchonl
ytol
eav
eseconds
l
ater
?”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Ihadt
ogosomewher
e.”
“
Notv
erypr
ofessi
onal
Mrs.Mot
samai
.”
Shel
aughed.“
Itwasj
ustal
aunch.
”
“Noonel
eav
est
hei
rownshowwhi
l
eit
’sst
il
lgoi
ng
on.
”
“
Well.Not
est
aken.Wher
edi
dyougetmynumber
Nat
e? ”
“
Hadt
obr
ibet
her
ight
ful
peopl
etogeti
t.
”
“
Wow!
”
“
Iwanttotakeyououtf
ordi
nnert
oni
ght
.Let
’ssay
whenyouknockoff
.”
“
Myhusband-
“
“Isaidwedidn’tdi
scussy
ourhusbandher
e.Am I
clearKenny
? ”
Shef oundher sel
fsmil
i
ng,t
histi
mearoundshel
et
herselffeelevery
thi
nghisv
oicealway
smadeher
feelwithoutfeeli
nggui
lt
y.
“
Ok.
”
“Iwil
lsendyout
henameoftherest
aur
antandt
he
dir
ecti
ons.I
t’
sapri
vat
epl
ace.”
“
Ok.
”
“
Tomor
rowwhatar
eyoudoi
ng?
”
“
Uhnot
hing.
”
“
Ok,
wewi
l
lgosomewher
etoget
hert
hen.
”
Shel
aughed.“
Obat
agompol
aisamot
howena.
”
“
Hedoesn’
tneedt
oknow.Wewi
l
lmakeapl
an.See
y
outoni
ght
.”
“
Ok.
”
Gontl
ewal
kedi
nholdi
ngahugebouquetoff
lower
s
wit
hmoneynot
es.Kennyf
rowned.
“
Who’
sthatf
or?
”
“Your
s.Andt hi
s.”Shegavehi
mt hesmallt
ri
angul
ar
boxwitharibbonthenasmallgi
ftbag.Kenny
openedthegiftbagandtookouttheP3000voucher
toabeautyspa.Shechuckledt
henlookedatthe
fl
owerswithallthemoney.
“
Wow!
”
Shet
ookt
henot
eint
hef
lower
sandr
eadi
t.

‘
Iam sor
ryImi
ssedy ourl
aunchyest
erday,
whenI
sai
dIwouldmakeituptoyou,Imeantit
,Ihav
e
plannedaget awayt ri
pt oDubait
omorrow, j
ustus.I
l
ov eyousomuch, Iknowsomet i
mesitmightnot
l
ookl ikei
t,butIlovey ou.Imessupthat’
saf actbutI
l
ov eyouandIwoul dgi veany
thi
ngforyou.Iam sorry
Ihaven’tt
hegr eatesthusbandinthepastfewweeks.
That’sgoi
ngt ochangewi thi
mmediateeffect.Your
s,
Rona.’

Kennysmiledreadi
ngthenot
ethenlookedatthe
fl
owers.Gontl
elaughedst
ari
ngatherbossblush.
“
Wheny
ouneedsomeonet
ocountt
hemoney
,tel
l
me.
”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Not
hanks.
”
“
Alsothi
scamef
ory
ou.Iam notsur
eifi
t’
spar
tof
t
hatornot.
”
“
Ok.
”
KennytooktheredboxandwatchedherPawal kout
.
Shelookedatthemoneythenathisnoteagaint
hen
smil
edcount i
ngthemoney.Whenshewasf inal
l
y
downshel aughed.Wast
hiswhatguil
tdidpeopl
e?
Sheopenedthetri
angl
eboxandl
ookedathercake
asherphonerang.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“MmaMot samai…whenIwokeupy
ouwerealr
eady
gone.It
houghtwewouldgohomet
oget
her.
”
“
Wareonki
saDubai
ner
rababy
?(Youar
etaki
ngme
t
oDubai
baby?
)”
“
Yes.Ourfl
ightt
oSAleavest
omorrowmor
ningt
hen
wewil
lconnecttoEmi
rat
esfl
ight
.”
“
Ser
iousbaby
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
DoIgett
otakeany
thi
ngt
hatIwantt
her
e?”
“
Yes.
”
Shescr
eamedt
wir
li
ngwi
thherchai
r.
“Iam soexcit
edeventhoughyouarecheati
ng.
Anyways,thanky
ouf ort
hetenthousand.Andt
he
vouchert
oo.Andthecake.”
“
Any
thi
ngf
ory
ou.
”
Shebl
ushedl
i
steni
ngt
othecheat
ingbast
ardshe
l
ovedsomuch.
“
Ok.Thanks.
”
“
Ilov
eyouok?
”
“
Ilov
eyout
ooMr
.Mot
samai
.Iwi
l
lnev
erst
opl
ovi
ng
y
ou.”
“
Bye.
”
“
Bye.
.”
Kennyopenedther
edgif
tboxandt
ookoutbl
ack
l
inger
ie.Shet
ookoutt
henote.
‘
Weareall
goingt
ohel
lsowhynotj
ustsi
nandhav
e
f
unwhil
eatit
?’
Shelaughedknowi
ngwhoitwasf
rom t
henl
ookedat
thel
i
nger i
ewit
hasil
lysmi
l
e.

*
**

Lat
ert
hatev
eni
ng,
Ronaf
ini
shedpr
epar
ingt
he
romanti
cdi
nnerforhim andhi
swi
fewhi
l
esi
ngi
ng
alongwi
thbusySignal
.

Gur
lyou’
real
lIneed
AndI
’
m al
way
smi
ssi
ngy
ou
Mi
ssy
oumi
ssy
ou
Mi
ssy
oumi
ssy
oubaby
Mi
ssy
oumi
ssy
ou
Mi
ssy
oumi
ssy
ou

Ineedy
ourt
ender
ness
Ican’
tresi
sty
ou
Mi
ssy
oumi
ssy
ou
Mi
ssy
oumi
ssy
oubaby
Memi
ssy
oumi
ssy
oumi
ssy
ou

Hesangal
ongdanci
ng.Hi
sphoner
ang,
hesmi
l
ed
asshecal
l
ed.
“
MmaMot
samai
…”
“
BabeIfor
gottotel
lyou.Ihavealat
emeet i
ng
t
oni
ghtoutsi
deworkpremises.Iam meeti
ngwi t
han
i
mport
antcli
entsoIwil
larri
vehomelate.Iam sure
y
ouwil
lbef i
neri
ght
?”
“
UhIhadmadesomepl
ansf
orus.
”
“Ei
sh,
sor
rymylove.Ireal
lycan’
tcancel
.Iwi
l
lcome
homeimmedi
atel
yaf t
er.Il
oveyou.”
Shehungupbef
orehecoul
drespond.Heswal
l
owed
st
ari
ngathi
sphone.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#112

Kennywal kedinsidetherestaur
anttheni
mmediatel
y
spottedNatewhowast al
kingtosomeone.He
smiledwalkingov er
,everystephetookfel
tli
kea
predatorabouttoattackit’
sprey.Shecoul
dfeel
his
presence.Hest oodinfrontofher.
“
Hey
…comet
hissi
de.
”
Shefol
lowedhimi nanicedressshehadboughtand
wentupt other
oofwher eanicedi
nnersetupwas.
Shesmiled.Hetookherhandandl edhert
othetabl
e.
Theybothsatdownsmi li
ngatoneanother.
“
Hey
,youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Thanks.
”
Shelookedaroundt
henherphonestar
tedringi
ng.
Shetookitoutfr
om herhandbagt
henlookedatthe
cal
lerI
D.
“
Sor
ry.Letmepi
ckt
his…”
Sheanswer
edherr
ingi
ngphone.“
Babe?
”
“
Hey
,whatt
imedoy
out
hinky
ouwi
l
lbedone?
”
“
Inanhourort
wo.
”
“
Oh…”
“
Iwi
l
lbewi
thy
ousoon.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
“Iam goi
ngt
oswi t
choffmyphone,
it’
sbeenr
ingi
ng
nonstopandtheyarebegi
nni
ngtol
ookatme.”
“
Uhok.
”
“
Bye.
”
“
Babe?
”
“
Yah?
”
“
Tlhammakeagor
ata.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
ooRona.Ar
eyouok?
”
“
Yeahj
ust
…I…i
t’
snot
hing.
”
“
Ok,
bye.
”
Shehungupswi
tchedi
tof
fasawai
terwal
kedov
er.
Theyor
der
edt
henhewal
kedaway
.
“
Isawy
ourgar
den,
impr
essi
ve.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Thanks.I
t’
sal
way
sbeenmydr
eam.
”
“Youreall
ydidwell
foryour
sel
f.Iam goingtogo
aroundtel
li
ngpeoplethaty
oudidyourinternshi
pat
mycompanyt oear
nmy sel
fmorepoints.”
Kennyl
aughed.“
It
’sok.
”
“Bytheway
,yourcombinat
ionofhav
inganevent
companywithatr
avelandtour
sissmart
.Your
l
aunchwasactual
lyeducat
ing,
pit
yyouwerenot
ther
e.”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Wil
lyouev
erl
ett
hatgo?
”
Thewait
erbroughtbackthei
rorders.Kennytooka
si
pofherwineast heybeguneati
ngchat t
ingand
l
aughi
ng.

*
**

Ronasatont
hecouchst
ari
ngatt
het
ime,
thi
rt
y
minut
eshadalreadypassedandhewasf i
ndingit
hardt
ositsti
ll
andwai tf
orher.Helookedathis
phoneunabl
et oshakeoffacert
ainfeel
ing.His
phonerang,
hequicklyanswer
ed.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Rona,
bor
rowmey
ourt
ool
boxt
omor
row.
”
Hesi
ghedl
i
steni
ngt
oLebi
tsot
alk.“
Yeahsur
e…”
“What
’sup?Okar
ey ouar
edisappoi
ntedt
hati
t’
s
onl
yme.Waiti
ngforaphonecall
?”
Ronasi
ghed.“
Everf
eltl
i
key
ouar
ebei
ngcheat
ed
on?”
“
IsKennycheat
ing?
”
“Idon’
tknow.Kennynev
erworksaft
erwor
khour
s.
Shedoesn’tdomeeti
ngsaf
terwork.
”
“
Andshesai
dshehasameet
ing?
”
“
Yes.Thi
scomesaft
erIwasaccusedofcheat
ing
t
heprevi
ousni
ght
.”
“
Werey ou?Kantemmegonewhydi dyoumissher
l
aunch?Itseemedasi
fherhusbanddoesn’
tsuppor
t
her.Kennyhasal
way
sbeent
her
eforev
erysi
ngl
e
thi
ngy oudo.
”
“Ishould, Iadmi t.Imessedi tupt herebutthisdeal
hasbeenst r
essi ngmesomuchIj ustwantedt o
fi
nalizeitandmov eon.Iwasgoi ngt ocomeIswear ,
Ihadev encheckedoutker eaf t
ert hemeet ingIwill
gohomebuti tendedl at
e, Ievent oldAt si
l
et ocome
backbecauseIt houghtwhatwasl eftwouldbe
signing.Ihadt ogobackt ot helodget obegt hem
formyr oom backbuti thadal readybeent akenby
someonemmehel at heladywat engwassay i
ngshe
woul dn’
tsl eepatt helodge.Shewasgoi ngt oherin-
l
aw’ shousesowemadeadeal Iwoul duset heroom
fortheni ghtandpay .Funnyst or ythathappened, I
wasgoi ngt oshar eitwit
hKennyaf t
erIhad
freshenedupt hent hereisaknockont hedoor ,I
openandt hereshei s.Shewal ksi n.Shest arts
l
ooki ngar oundt her oom, Iam bei ngaccusedof
cheat i
ng.Iam ev enaskedquest ionsl i
kesincewhen
doy out akel ongbat hsalonedr inkingwi ne.”
Bi
tsol
aughed.“
Ihav
ebeenaskedt
hatbef
oregot
we
ngngBit
so,whywouldy
outakeal
ongbathal
one.
”
“Well Iwi shinmycasei twasf unny .Kennywas
buil
dingacaseandt ell
inggor et hi
sr oom isactuall
y
notmi newoul dhaveconv incedhert hatIwas
cheat i
ngbuthonest lythatr oom wasn’ tmi ne.I
teven
smel tthewoman’ sper fume.Nowev eryli
ttl
ething
shewasseei ngmadei tlookIam cheat i
ng.Itr
ied
explainingmy sel
fbecausei fIwasr eall
ycheating
andIdi dn’tknowshewascomi ng,shehadt ofi
nd
somet hing.Buttherewasnot hi
ng.Sher i
desmeand
count smysemen.I fIev erregrettedmast ur
bation
before, Iregrett
edity esterday.”
Lebi
tsol
aughedhar
der
.“What
?”
“
Str
esswi
l
lmessy
ouup.
”
“
Howdoy
ouf
ucky
ourhandwheny
ouhav
eawi
fe?
”
“Ihav
ebeensost ressed,t
hesexIgi veherisnot
goodenoughebi l
ethelastti
mewef uckedshegave
meacer tai
nlook,Icoul
dseet hedisappoi
ntmentin
hereyesthoughshesaidnot hi
nh.NowIcoul dseeit
i
nherey esgotweIcaughty ou,youarecheati
ng.
Nextthi
ng,shecomesoutwi ththatwoman’shair
bandandg- st
ri
ng.Ithi
nkthatladyforgotmmehel aI
can’
tblameher
.It
’sherr
oom afteral
l.Idi
dn’
tev
en
haveanydef
ense.Iwasjustweak.”
“
Theoddswer
eagai
nsty
ou.
”
“Itgetsbett
er,Igettol
dIknowwhaty oudid,Iknow
i
twheny ouarelyingandIforgiveyou.Aft
erthatshe
say ssomethingli
ke‘whenit’
sy ourturnt
of or
give
me, youshouldjustdoso.’Thent odayIwakeupt o
hergone.Igotheracoupl ethingsandIam
regrett
ingri
ghtnowbecauseIam sur eit
’sli
keIam
tryi
ngt obuyherforgiv
enessmmehel aIam just
tryi
ngt oapol
ogizefornotbeingt her
eonaspeci al
day .
”
“Waaiiyouhav ejustbecomeacer t
if
iedcheat.Ebi
l
e
youain’tshit
.Youar egoingt
otastey ourown
medicine.Waitandwat chwena.Itwillendindi
vor
ce
andtears.Youdon’ thavegoodhist
ory .Andwomen
cheatwi t
hemot ionsunli
keus.Otli
legol el
a.(
You
aregoingt ocry.
)”
“
Iwi
l
lki
l
lher
,notwhenIhav
ebeenf
ait
hful
.”
“Tal
ktoher
.Expl
ainittoher
.Cal
lthatot
herwoman.
Youcaneventel
lhertobri
ngherhusband.Expl
ain
y
oursel
fmmehel
abel
i
evi
ngy
ouwi
l
lbedi
ff
icul
t.I
f
eel
sorryf
ory
ou.
”
“
Yah…i
tfeel
sli
keshei
scheat
ing.
”
“Lewenanextt
imerekaVi
agr
a.Youhav
et oal
way
s
givei
ttoher
.Kanawomencountt
hesethi
ngs.
”
“Letmej ustwaitmmehel aifsheischeati
ngIam
goingtokillbothofusandIam notev enjoki
ng.O
tl
abeant lwaelayaanong.Ihavegiventhi
smar r
iage
myal l
.It
’sonlynowt hatIwasslaki
ngbutIexplained
toherther estIam f
acingatwork.”
“
Don’
ttal
kli
ket
hat
.”
“
Iam t
ell
i
ngy
ou.Notaf
terev
ery
thi
ng.
”
“
Justwai
tforherandhearwhatshehast
osay
.”
Ronapaused.“
Look,l
etmecall
thecart
racki
ng
companyandtrackhercar
.”
“Ok,
Ronaremember ,youhav ekids.Qi
sateenager
,
heneedsyouaround.Thet r
iplet
sneedyou.They
can’
taff
ordhav
ingaf atheri
nj ai
landadead
mother
.”
“
Goshar
pMi
ster
.”
Ronahungupandcal
l
edt
hecompany
.

*
**

Tshenolofi
nall
yparkedhercarinfrontofherhouse
aft
erhoursofdriv
ing.Shesighedandst eppedoutof
hercarwithherbags.Herneighborwhowasout si
de
hi
shouset al
kingonthephoneshi r
tlessi nonl
y
sweatpantsl
ookedatherwi thasmi l
et henwav ed.
Shesmi l
edbackandbl ushedwalki
ngi nsideher
house.
Sheopenedhercurtainsli
ghtl
yandwat chedhim as
hetalkedser
iousl
yont hephonewhileholdingacan
ofhisbeerontheotherhand.Helaughedt hrowing
herheadback,shebitherlowerl
ikeli
psmi li
ngthen
shefinal
lymovedbackf r
om thewindowgi ggli
ng.
Shewentt
oherbedr
oom andcal
l
edhermot
her
.
“
Nol
o…”
“
Youcanputt
hem i
nthebust
omor
row.Iam back.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shefrownedataknockonthedoorthenshewalked
overhangi
ngup.Sheopenedthedoorandsmil
ed.
“
Hi…”
Hernei
ghborsmil
ed.“
Hey,Iam sor
ryf
ort
hisbut
thammakefelet
swekesukir
i.(
Ihaver
unoutof
sugar
.)
”
Tshenol
olookedatt
hecuphewashol
dingt
hen
l
aughed.
“
Real
l
y?”
“
Eish,
it’
stough.
”
“
Isi
t?”
“
Yeah.CanIcomei
n?”
Sheopenedt
hedoorwidert
henhewal
kedi
n.She
tookt
hecuptot
hekit
chenandcamebackwit
hthe
sugar
.
“
Take.
”
“
Thanks.Mynamei
sPuso.
”
Shehandedhi
mthesugar
.“Tshenol
o.”
“
Youar
epr
ett
y.”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Thanks.
”
“
Thanksf
ort
hesugar
.”
“
Youar
ewel
come.
”
Hewal
kedthenpausedandwal
kedbacki
n.“
Arey
ou
mar
ri
ed?”
“
No.Di
vor
ced.
”
Hesmi led.“Metoo.Weshouldhaveadiv
orcee
supportgroup.Howabouttomorrowatuhh10int
he
morning?Iwi l
lcomeoryoucancomeov erbut
whoev erishosti
nghast
opr epar
efood.
”
Tshenol
osmi
l
ed.“
Iwi
l
lcomeov
er.
”
“
Ok,bytheway,Ihavetwoki
ds.Theot
heronei
sat
v
arsi
tyandtheotheronei
s15.”
Tshenol
osmil
ed.“
Myoldesti
s13goi
ngt
o14.The
youngonei
s9goingf
or10.”
“
Wher
eist
hei
rfat
her
?”
“
InJai
l
,thei
rmot
her
?”
“
Mar
ri
edagai
nandst
aysi
nMexi
co.
”
“
Ok.
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Seey
ouatt
hesuppor
tgr
oupt
omor
row.
”
Shel
aughed.“
Ok.
”
Hewalkedout
,Tshenol
oclosedherey
esput
ti
ngher
handsonherf
aceblushi
ng.

*
**

Kennywalkedoutofther
est
aurantwi
thNat
e
l
aughing.Hewalkedhert
ohercar.
“
Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ng.
”
“
It
’sok.Ienj
oyedt
his.
”
Natelookedathert
henleanedoverandki
ssedher
.
Kennyclosedherey
eskissinghi
m backasNate
pushedagainstt
hecarkissi
ngherevenmore.

*
**
MeanwhileRonapar
kedhiscaratther
estaurantand
steppedoutl
ooki
ngforhercari
nthebigparkinglot
fi
l
ledwithcar
s.
.
.
Iknowit
'sshor
tbuthal
fal
oafi
sbet
tert
han
nothi
ng.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#113

Meanwhi l
eRonapar kedhi scaratther
estaurantand
steppedoutlooki
ngf orhercarinthebigparkinglot
fi
ll
edwi t
hcars.Acarst oppedbesidehimt henthe
driv
errol
leddownt hewi ndowasRonat urnedhis
head.Shesmi l
ed.
“
Heybabe,
youmeet
ingsomeoneher
e?”
HelookedatKennyasshesmiled.“
No.Iwant
edt
o
getusdeser
t.Ipr
epar
eddinnerforus.
”
Shegi
ggledsoft
ly.“
Ok.Letmeheadhomeandt
ake
ashowerwhil
eyou-“
“
No,
let
’sj
ustgohomet
oget
her
.”Hegoti
nhercar
.
“
Wher
eisy
ourcar
?”
“Iwi
l
lasksomeonet
ocomeandcol
l
ecti
t.Let
’sgo
home.”
“
Ok.
”
Shedr
oveof
ftur
ningupt
hemusi
cwhi
l
ehel
ooked
athersil
ent
ly.Shef
inal
l
ypar
kedthecarthen
steppedoutwithhi
m.Ronal
ookedatherdress.
“
Youwor
ethatt
owor
ktoday
?”
Kennyl
aughed.“IaskedMiatomeetmeatwor k
wit
hmywor kclothesandthisgi
rlbr
oughtt
his.
Someti
mesIdon’ tunder
standher.
”
Theywalkedi
nsi
det
hehouse,
Kennyki
ckedof
fher
shoes.
“
Iam sogl
adthekidsar
enotar
ound.Wait
sebabe
r
ightnowwewouldbewalki
ngi
ntoascene.
Shepausedst
ari
ngatt
hesetupandsmi
l
ed.“
Wow,
thi
sisni
ce.
”
Ronacareful
lylookedather ,
hehadbeensmel l
i
ng
themalecologneev ersincehehadgot t
enintoher
carandnowst andingrightbeforeherhecoul
d
heavi
lysmellit
.Therewasnowayshecoul dhave
gott
enitfr
om amer ehug.Shel ookedathi
m and
smil
ed.
“
Youar
equi
te,
arey
ouok?
”
Henodded.“
Yeah.
”
“
Thanksf
ort
his.
”
Ronapull
edhercl oserandkissedher.Kennyputher
handsonhisbicepsr ecei
vingthehotkiss.Ronaput
hi
shandinherdr essandi nsi
deherpant i
esand
i
mmedi at
elyt
ouchedherwetpussy .Hepausedand
l
ookedinhereyest henhest eppedbackand
swall
owed.
“
Iwi
l
lheatupt
hef
ood.
”
Kennynoddedandwal
kedupstai
rst
otheirbedr
oom.
Herphonerang,
shet
ookitoutandopenedthe
message.
Unsav
ednumber
:St
il
lupf
ort
omor
row?
Shesmi ledthendelet
edthemessageand
undressed.Shepausedandhel dherdr
esstoher
nose,fuckhiscolognewassost r
ong.Herphone
rang,shetookandanswer ed.
“
Nol
o…”
“
Hotnei
ghborspoket
ome.
”
“
Whatdi
dhesay
?”
“
Hei
sal
sodi
vor
cedandhi
sexi
smar
ri
ed.Wear
e
hol
dingadi
vor
cesuppor
tgr
oupt
omor
rowathi
s
house.
”
“
Aboutt
ime!
”
“
Iknow.ThankGodt
heki
dswoul
dnothav
ear
ri
ved
y
et.
”
“
Iam happyf
ory
ou.
”
“
Thanks.I
sRonaback?
”
“
Yes.Iam f
rom mydat
ewithNate.
”Shewal
ked
i
nsidet
hebathr
oom.“Wai
tseIdeni
edmysel
fni
ce
t
hings.
”
“
Dat
e?Youwentoutonadat
ewi
thNat
e?”
Kennypausedknowi ngjudgeJudywasaboutt o
takethest
and.May benottheexactfriendshe
neededtotel
lthis.Matt
eroffact
, noonehadto
knowaboutthis.Shepinchedherself
.Herbigass
mouth!
“
Itwasn’
tadat
e,j
ustdi
nner
.”
“
Nat
e…thatbossofy
our
s?Imethi
myest
erdayat
t
hel
aunch.
”
“
Oh…”
“Iam notgoingtotel
lyouwhattodoany more.I
beli
eveyouar eagrownwomanwhoknowswhat
sheisdoing.Ifyouaregoingt
ocheatony our
husbandtorev engehi
m cheat
ing,goahead.You
havemadey ourdecisionandnothi
ngcanstopyou.
”
“
Iam notcheat
ingonmyhusband.
”
“Youare.Iam surer i
ghtnowi tmustbeexci t
ing.
Sneakingalway si
sexciting.Hopeful
lywhenRona
fi
ndsout ,hedoesn’tkil
lyoubutsimplyleaves.
That’sonethingmenknowhowt odo.Noman
forgi
vescheat i
ng.Hemaysayhef or
giv
esy oubuthe
i
sgoi ngtothinkaboutitf oral
ongt i
met i
ll
hej ust
decidestoleave.Menar enotlikeussobepr epared
forthattoo.ButIam surey ouare.Youknowi t’
s
goingtohappen. ”
“
Iam notcheat
ing.
”
“AndIhopeNatewil
lbewor t
hit.Wor t
hsett
li
ngwi th
becauseyouar
enotgetti
nganyy oungerKenny .I
don’twanty
outoendupal l
singleandalone,kana
bythatti
menoonewi l
levenseet hatyoucheated
becauseRonacheat
ed.Youknowhowiti
swhenit’
s
donebywomen.Youar enotget
ti
nganyy
ounger
,
youareinyourl
atet
hir
ti
es.
”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Isai
dIam notcheat
ing.
”
“Justsoy ouknow,i
fy oucan’
tfor
givehim,youcan
alwaysleave.Anyways,l
etmegett obed.”
“
Ok.
”
Shehungupthentookashowerandwent
downst
air
sinhershortl
aceni
ghtdr
ess.Shesmi
l
ed
si
tt
ingdown.
“
Thanky
ouf
orgoi
ngal
loutt
odot
hisf
orme.
”
Hel
ookedatherandnodded.“
It
’sok.
”
Kennynoticedt
hesadnesswi t
hthesuspici
oni nhi
s
eyesthenstoodup.Sat
isfyi
nghisneedshadt obe
pri
ori
ty,t
hatwayhewoul dneversuspecti
t,Natehad
saidt
hat.Shesatonhislap.
“
Arey
ouokbabe?
”
“
Icoul
dsmel
lmal
ecol
ogneony
ou.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Iknow.I
t’
syour
s.”
Hef
rowned.“
Huh?
”
“It
’sy ours.TheoneIboughtthatt
imeandit
’ssti
l
lin
thereunopened.Bl ameital
lonMia.Todaywasjust
adi saster.That’
showIwassmel l
ingt
heentir
eday.
Youwantmet obri
ngi
tforyou?”
Shest
raddl
edhi
mthenmov
edonhi
sdi
ckki
ssi
ng
hi
m.
“
Iwantyout ofuckmeRona…Imi ssyou.Iam happy
y
ouar eher
ewi thme.AndIam sor ryf
oraccusing
y
ouofcheat i
ng.It
’sbecauseyouarealway s
t
ravel
i
ng.”Shesmi l
edfeeli
nghisdickjer
kt hen
l
ookedinhiseyes,thesadnessdi
sappearing.
“
Shoul
dIgetont
het
abl
e?”
Hestoodupwi
thherinhi
sarms.“
No.Iwantto
makelovet
oyou.Don’
tyouwantt
oeatfi
rst
?”
Sheshookherhead,
herl
egswr
appedar
oundhi
s
waist
.“Makel
ovetome.”

*
**
Apr
ilwalkedf
rom t
hebat
hroom t
hensatont
hebed
l
oti
oning.
“
Babe?
”
At
sil
elookedather
.“Yeah?
”
“
Ithi
nkweshoul dgetamaid.Iam notfeel
i
ngt
oo
well
.Thi
spregnancyisshowi
ngmef l
amesandwi
th
t
hekidsandwor k,
Iam notmanaging.”
“
It
’sok.Wecangett
hemai
d.”
Shetur
nedandlookedathi
m.Hehadal
way
s
ref
usedfort
hem t
ohireamaid.
“
Real
l
y?”
“
Yes.Ihavenot
icedy
ouar
eal
way
ssi
cksoIgety
ou.
Wewillgett
hemaid.
”
Shesmil
ed.“
Ok, Iwil
lst
artl
ooki
ng.Any
way
s,mycar
i
sgivi
ngmepr oblems.Howfarget
ti
ngmeanew
one?
”
“Ri
ghtnowit’
snotlooki
nggoodbabe.Thecary ou
wantisexpensi
veandourfi
nancesaretight
.How
aboutwetakeyourcartoamechanicthenhav eit
l
ookedat?Somepeopl edr
ivet
hesamecarf ora
l
ongt
ime.
”
“At
sil
eIhav
ebeendri
v i
ngt
hesamecarfor7year
s
now.Thi
scarhasal
lthepr
obl
emsoftheworl
d.I
don’
twanti
tanymor
e.”
“
Justhol
dont
oitf
or-
“
“Youholdontoi
tbecausef
rom t
omor
rowIwi
llbe
usingyour
s.Maybet
hatwil
lgi
veyout
hemoti
vati
on
ofgett
ingmeanewcar .
”
“
Babe-
“
Sheswi
tchedof
fthel
i
ghtt
hengoti
nbed.
“
Goodni
ght
.”
Hekissedherneck.“
MmaAt
sil
e,y
ouknowIr
eal
l
y
needmycarand-“
“St
arti
ngf
rom tomor
row, mycarisyourcarand
yoursi
smine.Youwil
ltakethatol
dthingfor
serv
ici
nganddriv
eit
.”
“
Babe-
“
“
Atsi
l
eIam t
ir
ed.Letmesl
eep.
”
Hesi
ghedt
hencuddl
edher
.“Ok.Iwi
l
lgety
out
he
cary
ouwant
.”
“
Thanky
ou!
”
Hesmil
edandkissedherl
i
psi
nthedar
k.“
Thi
sone
mustbeagi
rl
.”
Shel
aughed.“
Why
?”
“Ij
ustfeel
it.Ommaset
senwat
heseday
s.Iam ev
en
scared.
”
“
Mxm…”
Hekissedheragai
nthentur
nedheraroundand
l
if
tedherbutt
.Heslidi
nfrom behi
ndandservedher
wit
hgentlest
rokeswhil
eshemoanedsof t
ly.

*
**

Thefoll
owingmorning,Mothusi
spokeont hephone
si
ppinghiscoff
ee.Lefawalkedfrom hisroom
hol
dinghisschoolbag,hi
spantslower eddown
whil
ehisschoolti
ereachedhisthighs.Mothusi
watchedhissonashebouncedhol di
nghisschool
bag,
theschoolhati
nhi
shead.Hel
ookedl
i
keat
hug.
Heendedthecall
.
“Monna,oaper
eyangy
anong?(
Howar
eyou
dressed?
)”
“
Rra?
”
“
Whydoy
oul
ookl
i
keat
hug?
”
Lef
alaughed.“
Awpapa!
”
“
Ngng,y
oudon’
tlookl
i
keast
udent
.Don’
tyouknow
y
ourwai
st?
”
“
Ido.
”
“
So?Fi
xyourpant
s.Andt
hatt
ie?Sincewhendoties
r
eacht
her
e?Lookatmyti
e.Youlookunproper
!”
Nanaowalkedinherpy
jamasandl
aughed.“
Thi
sis
howhedresses.”
“Ngng,Iam notgoingtohav emysondr esslikethat
.
Ibetyoudon’thaveagirl
fri
end.Nogirl
wouldwant
suchaboywhodr essesl
ikeathug.Nextthingy ou
aresnatchi
ngpursesbecausealreadyyoudr essli
ke
athug.”
Lef
alaughedf
ixi
nghi
suni
for
m.
“
See,
youl
ookpr
opernow.Takeof
fthathat
.”
Lef
atooki
toffandputi
tinhi
sbag.“
Good.That
’s
morel
ikei
t.
”
Nanaogav
ehi
m hi
smoneyt
henhesmi
l
ed.“
Iam
goi
ng.
”
“Iam goingt
ogiveyouasurpri
sevisitatyourschool
.
Letmecat chyourpant
sreachi
ngy ourknees,Iwil
l
embar r
assyou.Whatti
medoest heseSaturday
classesend?”
“
Att
wo,
Iwi
l
lbef
ini
shi
ngupmyar
tpr
oject
.”
“Ok,Iam goi
ngtogi
veyourar
tteacheracal
land
checkony ourpr
ogr
ess.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hewal
kedout
.Mot
husi
shookhi
shead.
“Ican’
tbel
iev
ethi
s.I
t’
sthatsmal
lbear
dthatmakes
him dosuch.
”

*
**
Mi
agoti
nhercarpi
cki
ngAt
sil
e’
scal
l
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,Iwon’
tbeabl
etogety
out
hecarbecause-
“
Sher
oll
edherey
es.“
It
’sok.
”
“
Huh?
”
“
It
’sok.
”
“Iwon’tbeabl
etogeti
tnowbutIam goi
ngt
ogeti
tI
promise.”
“
It
’sok,
doIgett
okeept
hecar
dal
i
ttl
elonger
t
hough?”
Hel
aughed.“
Okbutdon’
tov
erspend.
”
“
Yesdaddy
!”
Anot
hercamet
hrough.
“
Look,
Kennyi
scal
l
ing,
let
’st
alkl
ater
.”
“
Ok.
”
Shehungupandpi
ckedanot
hercal
l
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,howaboutdi
nnert
oni
ght
?”
Shesmi
l
edr
ever
sing.“
Okwher
e?”
“
Ourusual
.Mywi
fei
soutofcount
ry.
”
“
Ireal
l
yhopeso.Wennar
ray
ourwi
fel
ooksscar
y.”
Thecall
erl
aughed.“Shei
snotar
ound.Hercancer
gotmoreaggressi
vesosheisi
nSouthAri
ca.Bythe
way,y
ourcarisontheway.”
Shesmil
ed.“
Thanky
oubabe.Iam sor
ryabouty
our
wif
e.”
“Nahit’
sok.Imean, shehashaditforawhil
enow.I
don’tt
hinkshewill
sur v
ivesoIam gett
ingmysel
f
readyforafuner
al.
”
“
Ok,
wel
lal
lthebest
.”
“
Ok,
lat
er.
”
“
Lat
erbabe.
”
Shehungupanddr
ovet
oherboy
fri
end’
shouse.
*
**

Attheair
port,
Kennywal kedi nsidewithRona
rocki
nghershor tyel
l
owdr essandheel s.Her
smoot ht
highswer eall
out ,Ronalookedar oundt
o
seewhowasst ari
ngathi swife.Kenny’sphone
vibr
atedi
nherhandbag, shetooki tandreadthe
messagethenlaughed.
“
Babe,
Tshenol
osay
sIshoul
dbr
inghersomet
hing
t
oo.
”
“
Wewi
l
lgethersomet
hing.
”
Shet
urnedtohimt
henki
ssedhi
m.“
DidIt
ell
youI
l
oveyoutoday
?”
Heshookhi
sheadt
henshel
aughed.
“
Ilov
eyou.Letmer
usht
othet
oil
et.Iam pr
essed.
”
Shehandedhi m herphonethenrushedof fwit
hher
handbag.Ronawat chedasshedi sappearedinthe
crowdt henwentthroughherphonebutt herewas
nothing.Apict
ureofhim andherwer ebothher
screensaverandwallpaper
.Hekepthi mselfbusy
goingt
hroughherpictur
es.Mi
nut
espassed,he
fr
ownedast enminuteswentbyt
henhefoll
owed
hertot
het oi
let
.

*
**

Insi
dethetoil
etcubi
cl
e,Kenny’sclosedhereyes
withherlegonNate’
sshoulderwhi l
eheateher
pussy.Shesqueezedherbreastashewor kedhis
tongueonher,shehadtogiveittohim,niggacoul
d
eatpussy.Kennyheardf
ootstepsthenpressedher
l
ipstogetherwhil
eNateconti
nued.
“
Kenny
!Babe!
”
Kenny
’shear
tski
ppedt
henNat
ewentev
enhar
der
.
“
Ah…”

Out
sideRonapausedhear
ingKenny
’sv
oicet
hen
si
ghed.
“
Babear
eyouok?
”
Hewalkedtothet
oil
etdoort
henpusheddownt
he
doorknobdowntoopenthedoor
.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#114

Kennyheldherbr
eathasRonatri
edopeningthe
l
ockeddoorthenshepressedherl
ipst
ogether
spasming.Natel
ickedherti
l
lshewasclean.Rona
knocked.
“
Babe!
”
Kennyt
ookadeepbr
eath.“
Iam comi
ngout
,asec,
mystomachi
supset
.”
“
Ok.
”
Nategotupsmi li
ng,shemovedherheadasshe
tri
edtokisshert henshewipedherpussywi tha
ti
ssue.Shespr ayedabitofherperf
ume, Nate
pushedagainstt hedoorki
ssingher.Feel
ingnaught
y
andrebell
ious,sheputherhandinhi spantsand
touchedhisweapon.Shesmi l
edthenwal kedout
l
eav i
nghimi nside.
“
Hey
…”
Ronal
ookedather
.“Hey
,ar
eyouok?
”
“
Yes.It
hinkIwi
l
lbef
ine.
”
Shewashedherhandsandwal
kedoutwi
thhi
m.
“
Ourf
li
ghtnumberhasbeencal
l
ed.
”
“
Let
’shur
ry.
”

*
**

Esisatonthebedwat
chi
ngasSeanpackedhi
s
cl
othesforhi
stri
p.
“
Sowhenar
eyoucomi
ngback?
”
“
Int
hreeweeks.I
twi
l
lbehect
ict
her
e.”
Shenodded,
hisphoner
ang,
her
eachedf
ori
tand
pi
cked.
“
Hel
l
o?Ok…”Hel
aughed.“
Ok,
Iwon’
tfor
get
.By
e.”
Hehungupwhi
l
eEsi
suspi
ciousl
ylookedathi
m.
Hepi
ckedhi
sbags.“
Ok,
Iwi
l
lseey
ou.
”
“
Won’
tyouki
ssme?
”
Hewal kedov erandgav eherasof tki
ssthensmil
ed
andwal kedout .Esiwentbehindhim andwatched
getinhiscart hendriveof
f.Sheslowlywalkedback
i
nsideherhousef eeli
ngunloved.I
twasl i
keshe
di
dn’texistany more.Sheslowlysatonthebed
bl
inkingawayhert ear
s.
Shewasany t
hingbutst upid,hewasn’tevenmaking
aneffor
ttoconvincehert hatther
ewasnoone.Last
ni
ghthehadst ayedupl at
echat ti
nginthekit
chen
whil
elaughi
ng.Itwaslikeshedi dn’tev
enmat ter
anymore.
Shet
ookherphoneandcal
l
edMaat
la.
“
Esi
..
”
Esi
tookadeepbr
eat
h.“
Hey,uhhcanLet
habov
isi
t
meandkeepmecompany.
”
“
Arey
ouok?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Youdon’
tsoundok.
”
At
earr
oll
eddownhercheek.“
Iam f
ine.
”
“
Whatdi
dhedo?
”
“
Ithi
nkhei
scheat
ingbuti
t’
sal
li
nmyhead.
”
“
Nah,whenyourinst
inctt
ell
syouhei scheat
ing,
t
rustme,hei
s.Iam notsayi
ngt hi
sbecauseIdon’t
l
i
kehim.Iam t
ell
ingyouwhat ’
sreal.
”
“Iam sost
ressed.Idon’
twantt
othi
nkt
oomuch,
can-
“
“
Wear
ecomi
ng.
”
Hehungup.Esiwait
edtr
yingnott
ocrybecauseshe
hadpromisedher
sel
fshewouldn’
tcr
yforaman
agai
nafterMaatl
a.
Tearsr
oll
eddownhercheeks.Sher
eachedf
orher
phoneandcal
ledhi
m.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Arey
oubackwi
thy
ourbabymama?
”
“
Wher
ear
eyouget
ti
ngt
hat
?”
“
Youhavechanged.It
’sl
ikeIam suff
ocati
ngy
ouin
y
ourhouse.Yest
erdayyoudidn’
tevenletmet
ouch
y
ou.
”
“
Moesi
yourhandswer
ecol
d.”
Esi
closedherey
est ear
ful
ly.“
Isaidwecanget
marri
ed.Youhaven’
tsaidanythi
ngyet
.”
“
Iam st
il
ltr
yingt
odigestt
hef
actt
haty
ouact
ual
l
y
wantt
ogetmar r
ied.
”
“
Pleasebehonestwithme…doy ouwanttobreakup
wi
thme?If eelunl
ovedandunwant ed.I
fyouwantto
l
eavethi
srelat
ionshi
ppleasesayso.”
“
Ihav
etogo.By
e.”
“Sean…”Esi
putherhandonherfacecr
ying.“
Please
stop…youarebr
eakingmyheart
.”
“
Wewi
l
ltal
klat
er.
”
“I
fyouwantmet
oleav
epl
easesayso.Youar
e
hurt
ingme.
”
“I
fyouwantt
oleav
eyoucanl
eav
e.Iam dr
ivi
ng.
Bye.
”
Hehungup.Moesi putherhandsoverherface
cry
ing.Awhil
elater,
Maatl
adr ov
einthroughthe
gate,Moesi
wipedherfacethenfor
cedasmi l
eand
openedthedoor.Shehuggedherson.
“
Boyboy
!”
Lethabosteppedbackandl
ookedathi
smot
her
’s
tearf
uleyes.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Youl
ookl
i
key
ouhav
ebeencr
ying.
”
Shel
aughed.“
It
’sanal
l
ergy
.”
“
Iknowanal
l
ergywhenIseeone,
that
’snotone.
”
Maatl
awal
kedov
er.“
Goi
nsi
deThabo,
letmehandl
e
t
his.
”
Thabosighedthenwalkedin.Maat
lal
ookedatEsi
.
Shelookeddownt r
yingtobli
nkawayhert
ears
whichwerefi
ll
i
ngherey es.
“
Comeher
e…”
Hepul
ledherf
orahug.Esi
pressedherl
i
pst
oget
her
t
ryi
ngnottocr
y.
“
It
’sok.
”
“
Hei
scheat
ing.
”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Iam sur
ehewentt
ohi
sbabymama.
”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
Shecri
edonhischestt
henminutesl
atershef
inal
l
y
keptqui
et.Maat
lar
ubbedherback.
“Goandt akeabat
h.Wewi
l
lgooutt
otakey
ourmi
nd
offt
hings.Go.
”
Shenoddedt henwalkedtothebedroom whil
e
Maatlawentbackt ohiscarandsatonthebonnet.A
whil
elaterLethabowalkedoutwit
hhismot her
,
MaatlasmiledatEsii
naf lar
edshortdr
essandf l
at
sandals.
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
Shel
aughed.“
Let
’sgo.Iam hungr
y.”
Theyal
lgoti
nhi
scart
henhedr
oveof
f.

*
**

Att
hemall
,theyst
eppedout,
Let
habowal
ki
ng
bet
weent
hem.Esi smi
led.
“
Ican’
twai
ttohav
eal
lmyki
dsar
oundme.
”
Let
habolaughed.“Kagoshoul
dcomeandf
eel
how
youst
il
ltr
eatuslikekidsmama.”
Esihel
dhi
shand.“
Youar
emyki
ds.Igav
ebi
rt
hto
you.
”
“
Isn’
tthatuncl
eSean?
”
Esit
urnedandlookedatSeanwi
thhisbabymama
anddaughter
.Sheswall
owedwatchi
nghim ki
ssher
.
Let
habotri
edtowal kov
erbutMaatl
apull
edhi
m.
“
No.
”
“
Hei
scheat
ingonmama!
”
Maatlal
ookedatEsiwhowastr
yingtohidehert
ear
s
butshewasfai
li
ng.Shewal
kedov ert
othem.
“
Sean…”
Seanturnedandlookedather
,hi
sbabymamat
oo.
Sheroll
edhereyes.
“Baby,
letmegoandcheckouror
der
.Wewi
l
lmeet
atthecar.
”
Esi
lookedatherasshewal
kedawayt
henshe
t
urnedherat
tent
iont
oSean.
“
All
youhadtosaywasIhav
edeci
dedt
ogobackt
o
mygir
lf
ri
end.
”
“Whatwereyouexpecti
ng?Youdon’twantt
oget
marri
ednorhavekids!Shewantstoandweare
goi
ngtobeaf amil
y.Eitherway
,Iwantt
orai
semy
daught
eri
napr opersetup.”
Let
haboangr
il
ywal
kedov
er.
“Youareweak.Youcoul
dhavewal kedawaybutyou
chosetocheatonherwit
hdumpl i
nglooki
ngwoman
youfuckedatapart
y,t
hatshoul
dt el
lyoualotabout
i
t’sok.
,eit
herway,
youneverdeservedmymot her
.”
“
Lit
tl
e-“
“
Iwi
l
lpunchy
oui
fyoui
nsul
tmyson.
”
Seanl
ookedatEsi
.“Soy
ouar
ewi
tht
hem?
”
“
Shei
swi
thherf
ami
l
ybi
tch!
”
Esi
lookedatLet
habo.“
Let
habo!
”
“What
?Hei
sone.Onewi t
houtabackbonetoo.Let
’s
gomama.Wewil
lcol
lectyourcl
othesandgo
home.
”
Let
habotookhismother
’shandandl
edhi
smot
her
away.Esi
lookedathi
m.
“That
’snothowyoutal
ktoelders.Myissueswi
th
Seanarenotyour
s.Thatwasdisrespect
ful
.”
“
What
’sdi
srespect
ful
ishi
m cheat
ingony
ou.
”
Esi
sighedt henlookedatMaat
lawhoshr
ugged.“
He
i
sdisrespectful
.”
“
Ineedt
olookf
orahouse.
”
“
Wewill
hel
p…-
“Maat
lapausedl
ooki
ngatawoman
wal
ki
ngwit
haboy
.
“
Iam comi
ng.
”
Her ushedaft
erherthenpulledherhand.Shet
urned,
theboyt ur
nedtoo.Maatlalookedathimthenl
etgo
ofherhand.Esiwalkedov erthenl
ookedatEma
thenhereyeswentt ohersont oo.
“
Whatdoy
ouwant
?”
Maat
lasmi
l
ed.“
Not
hing,
justsay
inghi
.”
“
Thoughti
twasy
ourbr
other
’sson?Thi
sismyson
wi
thmyhusband.Hei
sfi
ve.
”
Esi
smi
l
ed.“
Sor
ryt
obot
hery
ou.Goodseei
ngy
ou.
”
Emat
urnedandwal
kedawaywi
thherson.
Esi
sighed.“
Shei
spr
ett
y.”

*
**

Acoupleofhour
slat
er,Nat
ewalkedoutoft
he
ai
rpor
twithhi
sbag.Hisphoner
angthenhepicked
hi
sfri
end’
scall
.
“
Yah?
”
“
Wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
Keet
la.(
Iam comi
ng.
)”
“Youshoul
dhaveflowninyest
erday
.Kanawear
e
alr
eadyatTher
o’shouse.
”
“
Iam comi
ngr
ightnow.Gotabi
tbusyi
nGabor
one.
”
Thebechuckl
ed.“
Busywit
hthemarri
edwoman?
Lai
takabatagobol
aa!(
Theywil
lki
l
lyou.
)”
“
Eket
epel
ewena.
”
“Iam tel
li
ngy
ou.Herhusbandisgoingtoki
lly
ou.
Yout hi
nkhewil
lj
ustsmil
eandl eti
tgo?Ihopeyou
arereadytof
acetheconsequencesofwhatyouar
e
doing.”
“
Hewon’
tdoany
thi
ngi
fhedoesn’
tknowany
thi
ng.
”
“
Youar
epl
ayi
ngadanger
ousgame.
”
Nat
esmi
led.“
Youarepani
cki
ngwheni
tshoul
dbe
mewho’
spanicki
ng.
”
Thebel
aughed.“
Youar
etoochi
l
ledf
ort
his.
”
“BecauseIam car
eful
.Meandmygi
rlar
ecar
eful
.
Don’tstr
ess.
”
“Nothi
ngst ayshiddenfor
ever
.Hewil
lgetagunand
kil
lyou.Legale,
youar epr
eparedt
odiel
eavi
ngyour
kidsbehind.”
“Justr
elax.Iam ontopofmygame.Thatwoul
d
neverf
indoutjustli
kealotofmendon’
tknowthat
thei
rwivesarebeingchowed.”
“
Itr
iedt
otal
ktoy
ouandIf
ail
ed.
”
“Iam goingtot
akeherf
rom hi
m underhisnoseand
hewon’ tbeabl
etodoanyt
hingaboutit
.”
“
Youact
ual
l
ythi
nkshewi
l
lleav
eherhusbandf
or
y
ou.
”
“
Womencheatwi t
hemoti
onsThebe.I
t’
sonlya
mat
teroft
ime.Sheisgoi
ngt
obemi nesoon.”

THREEWEEKSLATER
.
.
Fort
hosewhodidn'tsee,ourgrouphasbeen
di
sabl
ed,j
oinoursecondgr oupcall
edThePri
me2.
Goundergr
oups,youwi l
lfi
nditthere.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#115

Thr
eeWeeksLat
er.
..

Kennysatinfrontoft hemirr
orbeauti
fyi
nghersel
f
whileRonawat chedsi t
ti
ngonthebed.Shetookher
ti
memaki ngsur eshel ooksmorebeauti
ful
.She
fi
xedherbabyhai rsonherweav ethengotupand
putonthelongheel s.Herphonerangthenshe
reachedfori
t.
“
Nol
o..
”
“
Hey
,Iam goi
ngt
oseeKgosi
today
.”
“
Ok…”
“
Iam scar
edt
otel
lhi
m aboutPuso.
”
“
Iam sur
ehewon’ tmind,heknowsheisfacing
y
ear
si npr
ison.Hecan’tstopyouf
rom movingon.
”
“Youknowheal
wayslookf
orwar
dtomyv
isi
ts.I
don’
twantt
obreakhi
sheart
.”
“Heknewt hi
swouldhappenoneday .Hewas
prepar
edfortheconsequencesofhisacti
ons.You
fail
tobehavethewayyoushould,anothermanwill
takeoveranddowhaty oushoul
dhav ebeendoing.
”
“
Iam soner
vous.
”
“
Don’
tbe.Iam sur
ehei
spr
epar
edf
ori
t.
”
“
Ihopeso.St
il
lcheat
ing?
”
Kennylaughd.“
Ij
omma, bye.
”Shehungupt hen
stoodupandsmi l
edatRonawhowasj uststar
ingat
her.
“
HowdoIl
ook?
”
Ronasmiledst
ari
ngatt
hedr
ess.“
Youl
ook
beaut
if
ul.
”
“
Thanks.
”
Shepi
ckedherhandbag.
“
Let
’sgo.
”
Hegotupi
nhissui
tthenwalkedoutwi
thher
.She
l
ookedasWazhafi
nishedpr
epari
ngtheki
ds.
“
Mor
ning.
.”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Mor
ningma…Qi
sal
readygone?
”
“Yes.Hesayshehasagr
oupassi
gnmentt
ofi
nish
upsohel ef
t.
”
“
Ok.
”
Saronalookedatherf
athercr
yingi
nheruni
for
m.
Ronapickedherup.
“
What
’swr
ongbaby
?”
Sheputherhandsonherf
acecryi
ng.Wazhashook
herhead.“
Shewantsmetodoherhairl
ikeLamedid.
Idon’
tknowhowLamedi dherhai
r.
”
KennywipedWar
ona’
sli
pswhi
l
eRonat
ri
edt
oget
Saronat
okeepqui
et.
“
Youst
il
ll
ookbeaut
if
ulSasa.
”
“
Iwantl
i
keLame…”
Kennyl
ookedatthehai
rst
ylesandsi
ghed.“
What
doesLame’
shairlookl
i
kethen?”
“Liket
his…”Shedidtofi
stsi
nherhead.Kenny
sighedthentookherfr
om Rona.
“
Wawa,
youal
sowantt
hat
?”
Sheshookherheadgetti
ngoffherchai
rtaki
ngher
bag.Kennyqui
ckl
ytookSaronabacktoherroom.
Shedestroy
edthebunshehadi nthemiddl
eofher
headanddidtwobunswi t
hcolorf
ulhai
rbandsthen
fi
xedherbabyhai
rs.Sheappl
iedVaseli
neonherlips.
“
Liket
his?
”
Sasanoddedbr
eat
hingheav
il
y.
“
Let
’sgo.
”
Theywalkedbackdownst
air
s,Ronal
ookedathi
s
daught
erandlaughed.
“
Wow!
”
“Theschool
busi
sher
e.Let
’sgo.Lar
ona,
please
swit
choffmyTV!
”
Laronasl
owlygotupt
henswi
tchedof
ftheTV
grabbi
nghisbag.
“
Mamat
eachersai
dther
eisameet
ingatschool
.
”
War
onasighed.“
Lar
ona,
teacheral
readycal
l
ed
mama.Sheknows.”
“
Iwasj
ust
-“
“
Sheknows.
”
“Ok,t
eacherdi
dcallme, y
ouareri
ghtWawabut
thankyouLarr
yfort
ell
ingme.Sasa,pl
easet
akeyour
bag.Whyareyoustandingther
e?”
Saronareachedforherbagthentheyallwal
kedout,
theygotintheschoolbuswhileKennygotinhercar
anddroveof f
,Ronabehindher.Herphonerang,she
smiledbit
ingherlowerl
ipthenpicked.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Arey
ouwi
thhi
m?”
“
No.
”
“
Comet
oMaunt
oday
.Youwi
l
lgobackonSunday
.”
Kennyl
ookedonther
earv
iewmi
rr
orandst
aredat
Ronabehi
ndher.
“
Ican’
t.
”
“
Youcan’
t?Why
?”
“
Iam notl
eavi
ngmyhusbandandmyki
dsf
ort
he
whol
eweekend.”
“
Comeon,
itwi
l
lbewor
thi
t.
”
Shelaugheddr i
vi
ngthenst
oppedhercaratthered
tr
affi
clight
.Ronastoppedbesi
deherandlookedat
her.Kennylookedathi
m wit
hasmi l
ethenblewa
ki
ssov erathimlaughi
ngatNate.
“
No.Andeit
herway…”Shelookedoutt
hewi ndow
t
urni
ngherhead.“
Hewil
lsuspectsomethi
ng.”
“
Youhav
eabr
ancht
hissi
de.
”
“
Iam notcomi
ngt
her
eNat
e.”
Thetr
aff
icli
ghtchangedthenshet
urnedgoing
anot
herdi
recti
onwhileRonawentstr
aight
.
“
Ok,youdon’
tact
ual
lyhavet
ocomet henbutcan
j
usttel
lhi
myouarecomingt
hissi
de.Iwil
lcome
t
here.”
“
Ishoul
dtel
lhi
m Iam comi
ngt
oMaun?
”
“Yes.Tel
lhi
mthatandst
ayther
einahotel
.Iam
coming.Wewil
lsl
eepatahotelt
oni
ght
,tomorr
ow
thenyougohome.”
“
Whati
fhesay
shewant
stocomewi
th?
”
“Youdon’ttel
lhi
my ouaregoing.Youtel
lhi
mt hat
babe,Iam alr
eadyattheai
rportandIam fl
yi
ngto
Maun.Thereisanemer gencyattheMaunbr anch
thatneedsmyattent
ion.It
’sFr
iday,yournannyis
goingtoherhousemeaninghewi ll
bel ef
talonewit
h
thekids.
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Ok.
”
Natel
aughed.“
Letmegetaf
li
ghtt
icket
.Iwi
l
lgetus
aroom atC-
SKYhotel
.”
“
Ok.By
e.”
“
Whatar
eyouwear
ing?
”
Kennygi
ggl
ed.“
Adr
ess.
”
“
Beneat
hit
?”
“
Athong.
”
“
Howfarar
eyouf
rom wor
k?Iwanty
out
oshow
me.
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
No.I
magi
nei
t.By
eeee.
”
Shehungupwithasi
ll
ysmil
e.Minut
eslatershe
par
kedhercaratwor
kandsteppedout
.Shecat
walkedi
nsi
deandsmil
edpassingt
herecepti
on.
“
Mor
ning!
”
“
Bossl
ady
!”
Kennywalkedtotheelev
atorasherwor
ker
sshook
thei
rheadsstar
ingather.
“
Youcansaywhaty
ouwantt
osaybutt
hatwoman
i
sanent
ir
eful
lmeal.
”
Thereceptioni
stlookedathercol
league.“Sheisand
thefactthatshedoesn’tneedtotr
yhar d.Ifeel
sor
ry
forMr.Mot samai.I
magi nehav
ingsuchababeas
yourwife,Iwouldconstantl
ybestressed.”
“Beaut
yrunsi
nKenny
’sf
ami
l
y,kanaev
enMi
ais
pret
ty.
”
“Idon’tli
keher,Ioncesawherf l
i
r t
ingwithamar r
ied
man.Shei sthekindthatt hi
nksbecauseshei s
beautiful
,shegetst osleepwi t
hev eryone.Sheprett
y
butnott hatpret
ty,shewoul dn’tlookasbeautiful
as
shedoeswi t
houtmake- up.Ihaveseenbet ter
,boss
l
adyi swaybeaut ifult
hanher .”
“NyaammaBi anca,yousoundjeal
ousri
ghtnow.It
’s
notMia’
sfaultt
hatyourboyfr
iendwantsher.Mi
ao
montlehel
a,(Miaispret
ty,
)ofcausenotl
ikeKenny
butsheisbeaut
iful
.”
“
Myboy
fri
enddoesn’
twanther
.”
Hercol
l
eaguel
ookedather
.“Hedoes.
”
“
Didhet
ell
yout
hat
?”
Thecoll
eaguel
aughed.“Ever
yonecansee.Youar
e
l
uckythatMiadoesn’
tdatebrokemen.
”
“
Mymani
snotbr
oke.
”
“Mia’
snewcarcanbuyt
hreeofy
ourboy
fri
end’
scar
.
Letmegotowor k.
”
Shewalkedawayl
eav
ingBi
ancacl
i
cki
ngher
tongue.
”

*
**

Miawal
kedi
nsideKenny’
sof
fi
cewithahugesmil
e
t
henshowedhertheri
ngonherf
inger
.Kennysmi
led.
“
OhmyGod!
”
“
Hepr
oposed.
”
Kennyst
oodupandl
ookedatt
her
ing.“
Wow!
”
“
Iam get
ti
ngmar
ri
ed.
”
Kennylaughed.“
Yesyouare.OhmyGod!Thi
sis
beaut
if
ul.Butareyour
eadyforthi
sst
ep?
”
Mi
asl
owl
ysmi
l
ed.“
Yes.
”
“
Ihopeso.Iam sohappyf
ory
ou.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“Yourmotherisaboutr
esur
facef
rom what
everhol
e
sheishi
dingin.”
“
Tel
lmeabouti
t.Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Thanks.Iam happyf
oryou.Ican’
twai
tfort
he
weddi
ng.Iam happyyouaremarry
ingagoodguy
t
oo.”
“
Met
oo.
”
Miawal
kedoutandwentt
oherof
fi
ceasherphone
r
ang.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Iam comi
ngdur
ingl
unch.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Atsi
l
est
ayaty
ourof
fi
ce.
”
“
Iam comi
ng.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shehungupandconti
nuedwit
hherwor
kcont
inual
l
y
st
eal
inggl
ancesatherr
ing.

*
**

Aprilf
rownedatt hebur
ningsensationwhil
eshe
peed.Shef i
nishedpeei
ngstaringattheyel
lowi sh
dischargeonherpantywithanawf ulsmell
.Shet ook
offherpantythenwashedherhandsandwal kedto
herbedr oom.Shehadbeenf eeli
ngtheburning
sensati
onf orafewdaysnow.Shet ookherphone
andcalledAtsil
e.
“
Babe?
”
“
Iam notf
eel
i
ngwel
l
.Iwantt
ogot
othehospi
tal
.
”
“
Let
’sgol
ater
,ri
ghtnowIam busy
.”
“
Ireal
l
yneedt
ogot
othehospi
tal
Atsi
l
e.”
“
BabeIam aboutt
ogeti
nameet
ing,
let
’sdoi
t
l
ater
.”
“
Ok,
luncht
hen.
”
“
Iwi
l
lsee.
”
Hehungup.Apr
ilsi
ghedt
hecal
l
edPeo.
“
Heygi
rl
..
”
“
Ihavebeenhav
ingabur
ningsensat
ionwhenIpee
l
atel
y.
”
“
Abur
ningsensat
ion?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Ngng,
whydoest
hatsoundl
i
keanSTI
?”
Apri
llaughed.“I
t’
snotanSTI,
Atsi
lei
snotcheat
ing
andIam nott oo.I
tmustbesomethi
ngel
se.I
suspectmynewpant yi
es.Canyoucomeandtake
met othehospital
?”
“
Ok.
”
“
Thanks.
”
Shehungupt
henf
reshenedup.
*
**

At
sil
elookedatRona.
“Soyouthi
nkshei
scheat
ingbecauseshehasbeen
nothi
ngbutagoodwi
fe?”
Ronashookhi
shead.“
It
’sj
ustt
hat.
.ther
eisjust
somethi
ngaboutt
hewaysheisbehavi
ng.I
t’
snot
l
ikeKenny.
”
“
Idon’
tknowwhaty
oumean.
”
“IknowKennyandt hewayshehasbeenbehav ingi
s
too…perfect
.That
’snotKenny .Nomat t
erhowmuch
happyshecanbe…shei sjusttoo…shei s…”He
sighedunabl
etoexplai
n.“Iknowmywi f
eandthe
wayshehasbeenbehav ing…it’snother
.”
At
sil
e’
sphoner
angt
henhet
ooki
tout
.
“
Heybabe.
.”
“
Iam goi
ngt
othehospi
tal
wit
hPeo.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Bye.
”
Hehungupandl
ookedatRonaconf
used.“
Iam
conf
used.
”
Ronashookhi
shead.“
Iam bei
ngcr
azy
.It
’spr
obabl
y
not
hing.
”

*
**

Atthehospi
tal
,Apr
ill
ookedatt
hedoct
orwi
tha
fr
own.
“
What
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Arey
ouj
oki
ng?Idon’
thav
eanSTD.
”
“Youdoandyoust
andachancet
opassi
tont
oyour
unbor
nbaby.
”
Tear
sfi
l
ledApr
il
’sey
es.“
ButIam notcheat
ing.
”
“Youmaynotbe,
butyourpar
tnermaybe.It
hinkwe
shoul
dal
sotestyouf
orHIV.”
Apr
ill
ookedatt
hedoct
orandbur
sti
ntot
ear
s.
.
.
Don'tfor
gettoli
keandcommentonouri nser
ts
family
.Ourinser
tshavemor ethan4k+li
kes,I'
m sure
wecanal sopart
ici
pateinthecommentsect i
on
Forthosewhodi dn'
tsee,ourol
dgroupisback,it
's
call
edThePr i
me, y
ouwi l
lfi
nditundergr
oupsher e
andithas11kplusmember s.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#116

Peosati
nhercarhol
dinghermilkshakewhi
l
e
tal
ki
ngonthephonewithherhusband.
“Iam tel
l
ingy
oubabe,
all
thesy
mpt
omsshet
oldme
provesanSTD.”
“
Eish,
andshei
spr
egnant
.”
“
Koor
enoMot
samai
mani
sjustf
ait
hful
.”
“NyaaAtsi
l
eodi r
il
emat l
akal
ahel
a.(
WhatAt
sil
ehas
doneispurenonsense.
)”
“Kananowt hebabycangett
heSTD.Iwonderwho
he’scheat
ingwit
h.”
Apri
lwalkedoutoft
hehospi
tal
holdinghermedi
cal
car
d,fr
om herlongf
acePeocouldtell
itwasonl
y
badnews.
“
Babe,
shei
scomi
ng.Shel
ookssad.
”
“
Eish,
ok,
wewi
l
ltal
klat
er.
”
ShehungupasApr
ilgoti
nthecar
.
“
Whatdi
dthedoct
orsay
?”
“
Takemet
oMot
samai
Real
Est
ate.
”
“
Ok.
”
Peost artedthecaranddr ovet
oMot samaiReal
Estatesilentl
ywhi l
eApri
ljustl
ookedoutthroughthe
windowqui etl
y.Awhilel
aterPeoparkedthecarthen
April
st eppedout .Shewalkedi
nsidethecompany
andwentst rai
ghttoAtsi
le’sof
fi
ce.Shelookedathis
PA.
“
Wher
eisy
ourboss?
”
“
Hei
sinameet
ingatt
heboar
droom wi
th-
“
Apri
ltur
nedandwal kedtotheboardr
oom.She
openedthedoorwalkingin,
every
oneturnedand
l
ookedather.Atsi
l
ef rownedstar
ingather.
“
Atsi
l
e…”
At
sil
eapol
ogi
zedwal
ki
ngoutt
hent
ookApr
ilt
ohi
s
of
fi
ce.
“
Itbet
terbei
mpor
tant
.Youj
ustcan’
t-
“
Shehandedhim hermedi
calcar
d.Hel
ookedati
t
thenpausedr
eadingagai
n.
“
Fuck!
”
“Ihav
enevercheatedonyoubefore.Iexpl
ainedt
o
thedoct
orthatIhaven’
tbeencheati
ngandIam sure
myhusbandhasn’tbeencheati
ngbecausehei st
he
onlymanIam sleepi
ngwith.
”
Atsi
leli
ckedhislips.At earrol
leddownApri
l
’s
cheeks.“Thedoct orsai
dt hebaby…ourbaby,y
our
babycancomeoutwi thit.Youknowhowkidswho
arebornwi t
hgonor rhealookliker
ight
?Maybeour
chil
dwillbedisabledorbl i
nd.”
Atsi
l
eslowlysatdown.Apr
ilsmi
l
edsadl
ywi
ping
awayhertear
s.
“
That
’sal
lIcamet
otel
lyou.
”
Shet
ookhermedi
cal
down.“
Bye.
”
Shewal
kedoutandwentbacktoPeo.Shegoti
nsi
de,
Peost
art
edthecaranddroveoff
.Shehel
dhersel
f
ti
l
lPeost
oppedthecaratthegat
e.
“
Icanst
aywi
thy
ou,
keepy
oucompany
.”
“
No,
Iam f
ine.Thanky
out
hough.Forev
ery
thi
ng.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
Shest eppedoutthenwal kedinhery ard.Shegoti n
herhouset henslowlywalkedt othecouch, hereyes
fel
lonhercar dagainandshesl owlyreadthrough.
Painchokedher .Sheputherhandsonherf ace
cryi
ng.Shecr iedsomucht il
ltherewer enot ears
comi ngoutthenshej ustsatt
her e.Sheslowl y
reachedf orherphoneandcal l
edherf ather.
“
Apr
il
…”
Apr
il
’sl
ipstr
embledatherfat
her
’svoi
ce.“Myhear
t
i
spainf
ulpapa.Myhearti
spainf
ul.Myhearti
s
hur
ti
ng.
”
“
What
’swr
ong?
”
“
Atsi
l
egav
emeSTD.At
sil
eischeat
ingonme.
”
Theol
dmanswal
l
owedl
i
steni
ngt
ohi
sdaught
ercr
y.
“
Myhear
tispai
nful
papa.
”
“
Comehomengwanake.Comehome.
”
“
Myhear
t…”
“
Comehome.Come.
”
“
Papa…”
“Comehome.Iwi
l
lbewai
ti
ng.Wi
thopenar
ms.
Comehome.”

*
**

Atsi
leswal l
owedsitt
inginhisof f
ice.Hi
shear twas
poundingsomuchashesatt here.Minutespassed
asher ecall
edherresul
ts.Hel ookedathisphone
thenswallowed.Hehadnev erfel
tthatweak.Itwas
asifsomet hingwasdraininghisenergy.Hecoul dn’
t
evenbegint othi
nkanythingashesatont hatchair
.
Ronawalkedinandl
ookedathi
m.“
What
happened?”
At
sil
elookedatRonat
henshookhi
shead.
“
Tel
lme,
youl
ookl
i
key
ouhav
eseenaghost
.”
“
It
’snot
hing.
”
“
Atsi
l
ewhathappened?
”
Helookedathisbr
othernotsur
eofwheretoeven
star
t.Heopenedhi
smout htotel
lhi
m butnot
hing
cameout.
“
Whati
sit
?”
“
I…I
….Apr
ilhasanSTD.
”
“
Shei
scheat
ing?
”
Heshookhi
sheadt
henRonasi
ghed.“
Youar
e?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Yougav
ehert
heSTD?
”
“
Ithought
-“
“Si
ncewhendoyoucheatandontopoft
hatbr
ing
STDtoyourwi
fe?Apr
ili
spregnant
!”
“
I…Iwasn’
tthi
nki
ng.
”
“
Doyouknowthatt
heSTDcanbepassedov erto
y
ourunbor
nchi
ld?Howrut
hlessandcar
elesscan
y
oube?”
“Iwasn’
tthi
nki
ng.Idi
dn’
tthi
nkt
hatshewoul
dhav
e
anySTD.”
“
Who?
”
At
sil
elookedathi
m.“
Somegi
rl
.”
“Ican’
tbeli
eveyoudi
dthi
stoheraf
terev
ery
thi
ng.I
am disappoi
ntedi
nyou.Whatdi
dshesay?”
“
Shewascal
m and…”
“
Whatareyoudoi
nghere?Shoul
dn’
tyoubewi
thher
r
ightnowt
ryi
ngtodeal
withthei
ssue?”
“
Iam scar
ed.
”
“
Wow!
”
“
Shei
sgoi
ngt
oleav
e.”
“Yougaveheradisease.Youdon’
trespectorl
ove
herenoughtopr
otectheroryourchil
d.”
Atsi
eputhi
shandsonhi
sheadasRonashookhi
s
head.
“
Wow!Ican’
tbel
i
evet
his.
”
“
Imessedup.Idon’
twantt
olosemywi
fe.
”
“
Iam disappoi
ntedinyou.Cheati
ngonherisone
t
hingbutyougivingherdi
seases?Whoisthis
womany ouwer
efuckingwi
thnocondom atthe
expenseofy
ourmarr
iage?Whati
fsheispregnant
?”
“
ImessedupRona.
”
“
Youdi
d.Bi
gti
me.
”
“
Fuck!
”
“
WhatSTDi
sit
?”
“
Gonor
rhea.
”
“
Wow!Whati
fthebabycomesoutbl
i
nd?
”
“
Iam scar
ed.
”
“
Odir
il
emasepaAt
sil
e.Doy
oul
ovet
heot
her
woman?”
Helookedathi
sbr
otherandswal
l
owedt
henshook
hi
shead.“No.”
“
IwonderhowApr
ili
sfeel
i
ng.WhataboutHI
V?”
“
Negat
ive.
”
“Atl
east
.Iam sur
eshegotsomeant i
-bi
oti
cs.And
don’
tfor
getwhatherfat
hersai
dify
oucheatonher .
Youarenevergoi
ngtogetanerr
ect
ion.Mdalaotl
il
e
gogobankany
a.”
Atsi
l
eswall
owedthenRonachuckl
ed.“Wedon’
t
know.Howaboutyoudoonetwotesti
ng?
”
At
sil
e’
sphoner
ang.Het
ooki
tandpi
cked.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Heybabe,
arey
oust
il
lcomi
ng?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Youcan’
t.Myboy
fri
end-
“
“
Iam comi
ngandIam comi
ngt
her
enow.
”
“At
sil
eIam noty
ourwif
e,youjustcan’
tbe
commandingmearoundli
kethat.
”
“
Ishoul
dfi
ndy
oual
readywai
ti
ng.
”
Hehungupt
hent
ookhi
scarkey
s.Ronal
ookedat
hi
m.
“I
fyoudosomethingst
upi
d,youaret
heonewho
al
wayssaythi
s,youwil
lgotojai
l
.”
At
sil
eignor
edhi
m andwal
kedout
.
*
**

Atsi
l
ewait
edasMi awalkedovermovi
ngherhips
fr
om si
detosidet
ucki
ngherhairbehi
ndherear.She
goti
nthecarandsmil
edathim.
“
Youshoul
dn’
tor
der
ingmear
oundl
i
ket
hat
.”
At
sil
elockedallt
hedoor.“
Ifyouliet
omeabout
whatIam abouttoasky
ou, Iam goi
ngt
oshowyou
whoIreal
lyam.”
Mi
alookedathi
m.“
What
?”
“Mywif
ewentt
othehospi
tal
andcamebackwi
than
STD.
”
Mi
afr
owned.“
What
?”
“
Apr
ildoesn’
tcheat
.Besi
desher
,Iam sl
eepi
ngwi
th
y
ou.
”
“
Arey
ouaccusi
ngmeofsomet
hing?
”
“
Iam t
heonl
ywhocouldhav
egiv
eni
ttoher
.Igav
eit
t
oher,
wheredi
dIgeti
tMia?”
“
Heel
arr
a,Iam notgoi
ngt
osi
ther
eandbeaccused
ofhav
ingSTD’s.HowcomeIam fine?Youdon’
t
knowwhatshei sdoi
ngthewhol
edaywhileyouar
e
atwork.Idon’
thaveanySTD.
”
“
Mia,
mywi
fedoesn’
tcheat
.”
“ThenexplaintomehowIcouldhav egiv
enitt
oyou
whileIdon’thaveit
?Youandyourwifearet
heone
i
nfected.Iam feel
ingfi
neAt
sil
e.Iam notsi
ckbut
yourwifeis.”Tear
sfil
l
edhereyes.“
Howcany ou
accusemeofhav i
ngSTD’s?
”
Atsi
lel
ookedatherasshecr
iedt
henhegrabbedher
phonefr
om herhand.Hel
ookedati
trequi
ri
nga
password.
“
What
’st
hepasswor
d?”
“
Giv
ememyphone.
”
“
Nnel
epasswor
dMi
a.(
Giv
emet
hepasswor
dMi
a.)
”
“
Iam notgi
vi
ngy
oumy
-“
Hegaveherahotbacksl
ap.“
Iam notgoi
ngt
oask
youagai
n.”
Shocked,
Miahel
dhercheekasi
tbur
nthot
.
“Kar
ennelepasswor
d.(
Isai
dgi
vemet
he
passwor
d.)”
“
Atsi
l
edi
d-“
Hegaveheranot
herone,shebi
thert
ongue
mist
akenl
yasherearrang.
“
Giv
emet
hepasswor
d!”
“
Iwoul
drat
herdi
e.”
“
Ohy
ou’
drat
herdi
e?”
Mialookedathim cry
ingt henshet r
iedopeningthe
doorbutitwaslocked.Heunl ockedhisdoort hen
steppedandopenedt heboot .Mialeanedtohi sseat
andunlockedalldoor
st henst eppedouttorunbut
Atsil
egrabbedherhand.
“
Wenay
ouwoul
drat
herdi
eaker
e?”
“
HELP!
”
Heputhishandonhermout hdragginghertothe
bootandthrewherinsi
de.Hecloseditt
henlooked
aroundbeforeget
ti
nginhiscaranddriv
ingoff
.
*
**

Insidetheboot ,Miabangedthebootfeel
i
ng
claustrophobic,herheartwaspoundi
ngsomuchas
shel ookedatt hedarknessunabl
etoreal
lymoved.
Shecr iedlouderbanginginsi
deasthecarmoved.

*
**

Onl unchhour
,Esiwalkedf
rom hawkeracrossthe
roadholdi
ngherfatcakesandsoup.Seanpar ked
hiscarasshewalkedf r
om acr
osstheroad.He
steppedoutandlookedatherinherj
umpsui t
.
“
Hey
…canwet
alk?
”
Esi
lookedathi
m.“
Hi.Howi
syourf
ami
l
y?”
“
Iam sor
ryabout
-“
“
Don’tbe.Iam sur
ey ouwereplanningtodoitfora
whi
lenow.Iam happyy ouhavefinall
yfoundthe
womanwhocangi veyouki
dsbecausehonest lyI
wantedt ogiveyoukids.Idid,Igotoffmybi r
th
controlpl
anwhenIr eali
zedwhet herwehadsext en
ti
mesadaywi t
hnopr otect
ion, Iwasn’
tgoingtoget
pregnant.Idi
dn’twanttohur tyourfeeli
ngsbytel
ling
youthaty ouwereshootingbl ankssoIt ol
dyouItied
myt ubes.Myt ubeswerenev ert i
ed.Ihavetwokids,
Igavebi r
thtothem.ButIam gl adyoucouldfi
nd
someonewhocoul dhelpy ou.”
Shewalkedpasthimleavi
nghim st
andi
ngther
ein
shock.Maatl
asteppedoutofhi
scarthenr
ushed
overtoherhol
dingNandos.
“
Kantecan’
tyouj
ustst
ayputandbesur
pri
sedwi
th
l
unch?”
Esi
laughed.“
Youshoul
dhav
etol
dme.
”
“
Mxm,
arey
eko!(
Let
’sgo.
)”
Theywalkedi
nsi
det
hecompanychat
ti
ngasSean
j
ustst
ared.

*
**
Laterthatday,Kennylookedatherlingeri
ethentook
acertainpieceshelovedandthrewi tinsi
dethe
overni
ghtbagt ogetherwit
hthesilkygown.Shet ook
aformal dressandsomeofhermake- upandwalked
out.Qwhowasi nthekitchenwalkedoutandl ooked
ather.
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“
Iam goi
ngt oMaun.Iam comi
ngbackt
omor
row.
I
t’
sabusinesstr
ip.
”
“
Whatbusi
nessdoy
oudi
scussonweekends?
”
“I
t’
sanemergency
.Iwasmeantt
ogodur
ingt
heday
butIcoul
dn’
t.
”
“Butt
odayi
sourmovi
enight.It
houghty
ouand
daddymadeapromi
sethatno-“
“
Q,wewi
l
ldoi
ttomor
row.What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
Heshookhishead.“
Ijusthav
eabadf
eel
i
ng.
Yest
erdayIhadabaddr eam.
”
Shehuggedhim.“Iwil
lbebacktomor
row.Iam
taki
ngtheear
li
estfl
ightback.
”
Qsmi
l
ed.“
Ok,
youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Thanks.By
e.”
Shekissedthetr
ipl
etst
henwalkedoutgett
ingi
nher
carheadedtotheair
port
.Herphonerangshesmil
ed
andpicked.
“
Hey
…”
“
Hav
eyoul
efty
ourhouse?
”
“
Yes,
Iam headedt
otheai
rpor
t.
”
“
Ok.Iam al
readyt
her
e.Youcancal
lhi
mtel
l
inghi
m.”
Kennyhungupandcal
l
edRona.
“
Heybabe,
whatshoul
dIbr
ingt
odayf
ort
hemov
ie?
”
“
Shit
!Iam fl
yi
ngout
.Ther
eisanemergencyko
Maun.Ihavetogot
her
e.Iwi
ll
bebacktomorrow
morni
ng.”
“
What
?”
“I
treall
yneedsmyat
tent
ion.I
t’
sal
astmi
nut
ethi
ng.
Iam real
lysor
ry.
”
“
Youar
egoi
ngonaFr
iday
?Tomor
rowi
t’
sSat
urday
.”
“
Theyar
eatt
heof
fi
cewai
ti
ngf
orme.Somet
hing
happenedwi
tht
hecl
i
ent
s,Ihav
etogot
her
e.”
“
Buty
ouhi
redpeopl
efort
hatj
ob.
”
“Ronawer ecentlyopenedthetravel
side,youknow
howi ti
s.Ineedt ogothereandmakesur etheydo
thi
ngsproperly.Ican’
thavemycompany ’sname
beingtar
nished.Ireal
lyexpectedyoutounder st
and.
I
t’sokifyouarenotcomf ortablewit
hit.Iwon’tgo.
”
“That’
snotwhatIam sayi
ngKennyIam j
ust
…it
’sa
bitoddbuti
t’
sok.Iguessitwi
llonl
ybemeandthe
kids.Whatt
imeisyourfl
i
ght?”
“I
nf i
ft
eenminut
es.Iam sor
ry.I
tisoddbutt
herei
s
nothi
ngIcando.IwishIwereli
keyou.Youareapr
o
atthi
s.”
Helaughed.“
Youar
edoi
nggr
eat
,Justr
elax.Youar
e
pani
cking.
”
“
Eishy
ah,
Iwi
l
lcal
lyouassoonasIl
and.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Iwi
l
lbebackt
omor
rowmor
ning.
”
“
Ok.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Ilov
eyoumor
e.”
.
.
Li
keandcommentassoonasyoureadf
ami
l
y,we
haveot
herbonuseswai
ti
ngf
orus.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#117

Seanwalkedinsi
dehisbabymama’shousethen
l
ookedattheirdaught
er.Shewal
kedf
rom the
ki
tchenholdi
ngawoodenspoonsmi l
i
ng.
“
Heybabe.
.”
“
Who’
schi
l
dist
hat
?”
Thebabymamastoppedsmi
l
ingt
henf
rowned.
‘
Whatdoyoumean?”
“
Who’
schi
l
dist
hat
?”
“
Ist
hismeantt
obeaj
oke?
”
“
No.
”
“
Arey
ouquest
ioni
ngy
ourdaught
er’
spat
erni
ty?
”
“Esisay
sshelonggotoffherbirt
hcontrolyear
s
backandIneverusedprotect
ionwithheryetshe
nevergotpr
egnant.Hert
ubesnev ergotti
ed.”
“
Arey
ougoi
ngt
oli
stent
othatwoman?Ser
iousl
y?”
“
Shehasnor
easont
oli
etome.
”
Thebabymamal ookedathi mthensighed.“Ther
eis
yourdaughter
.Pleasetakehertothehospitaltorun
DNAt est
s.Ihavenothi
ngt ohi
de.I
fsheisnoty ours
youwillf
indout.Takeher .Andpl
easewheny oufi
nd
outthetr
uth,t
akey oubagandl eavemyhouse.Al l
wewi l
leverbeiscopar ents.
”
Shetur
nedandwalkedbackt
otheki
tchen.Sean
l
ookedathi
sdaughtert
henhefol
l
owedhi sbaby
mamat ot
hekit
chen.
“WhatdoyoumeanSean?Isai dt akey ourdaughter
andgodoDNAt estsbecausey our atherli
stentoa
womanwhoi sangryobviousl
ysi ncey oulefther
.
TakeyourdaughterforDNAt ests,from therecome
andtakeyourbagsandl eavemyhouse.Iwi ll
notbe
tr
eatedl
ikethis.
”
Seanlookedatherandsi
ghed.“
Iam sor
ryi
t’
sjust
that
-“
“Seanmaybey oushouldgobacktoEsi.Youloveher
,
shewill
probablymarr
yy ounow,Iam notgoingto
begoingbackandf or
thwithyou.Ij
ustthoughtwe
wouldrai
seourdaught
ertoget
herl
i
kear eal
family
butIam begi
nni
ngtothi
nkthatmaybeIam for
cing
youint
othis.
”
“
Comeon,
it’
snotl
i
ket
hat
.”
“It
hinktobesafej
usttakeherandhaveDNAtest
s
done.Iwouldn’
twanty
oudoubt i
ngherpat
erni
tyi
n
thefut
ure.
”
Seanst
oodbehi
ndherki
ssi
ngherneck.“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“Please,
tomorrowgowi t
hher .Iknowwemetata
partybutithadbeenayearsincet hel
astt
imeIhad
hadsex.Iam sur eshei
syoursbutgoandv erif
yit
.I
reall
yhavenothingtohi
de.Tomor rowmorning,
wakeupandgo. ”
Seant
urnedherar
oundandpi ckedherupt
hen
pl
acedherontheki
tchencounters.
“
Iam sor
ryCar
ol.
”
“
No,
pleasegowi
thhert
omor
row.
”
Heleanedoverandki
ssedherpul
li
nghercloserthen
par
tedherthi
cklegsandpushedherpant
iestothe
si
debeforesi
nkingi
n.
*
**

Atsi
leslowl ywalkedinsidehishousethenlookedat
Apri
lwhowassi ttingont hecouch.Shedidn’
teven
tur
ntol ookathim.Hewai t
edthinki
ngmay beshe
wouldst artyel
l
ingbutt herewasnot hi
ng.Nowhe
wasn’tsurehowt odeal wit
hit.Anangrywoman
wasbet terthanasi l
entone.
Hesatbesi
deher
.“Iam sor
ry.
”
Shenodded.“
It
’sok.
”
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Tomor r
owIam goi
ngtomyfat
her’
shouse.It
hinki
t
wil
lbemuchbett
ergoi
nghometoavoidst
ressgape
l
ewenay ouwi
ll
beabletodowhatyouwanttodo
f
reely
.”
“
Babe,
youdon’
thav
etogo.Wecan.
.-
“
“
Ihavest
art
edmytreat
ment
.Hopef
ull
ythebaby
won’
tbeaff
ect
ed.
”
“Iam sorr
y,canwetalkabouti
t?I
twasami
stake.
Shegav emeabl owjob.
”
Aprill
ookedathi m.“ Iam notinthemoodf orli
es
todayAt si
lethat’
swhyIam notev enbot heri
ngy ou.I
knowy ouar enotgoi ngt obehonestwi t
hme.I fIask
youwhyy ouwon’ tevenanswerme.Al lIwantist o
givebir
tht ohealthychildren.Mychil
drenar ecoming
withme.Iwi llnotleavet hem behi
nd.GapeInev er
wanttocat chy oukissingmyki ds,whoknowswhat
othersicknessy ouhav e.”
At
sil
eswall
owedasshespokesocalmlyasi
fshe
wasnotangr
y.“
Igott
est
ed.Idon’
thaveanyt
hing
el
se.
”
“Iam goi
ngtosleep.Thechi
ldr
enarepl
ayi
ngint
hei
r
rooms,youwil
ltuckthem i
n.Pl
easedon’
tki
ssmy
babi
es.”
“
Iwi
l
lmov
eout
.Youcanst
ayher
e.”
“
Soy
oucanmov
einwi
thy
ourgi
rl
fr
iend?
”
“
No.
”
“
What
ever
,Iam goi
ng.
”
“
Yourf
atherwi
l
l-“
“
Heal
readyknows.
”
At
sil
eswal
l
owedhar
d.“
What
?”
“
Itol
dhi
m.”
“
Soy ouwil
lrunandt
ell
him ev
ery
thi
ngwego
t
hrough.
”
“Youbroughtmedi
seases!Hei
stheonl
ypar
entI
have!
”
“
Itwasonl
yabl
owj
ob.
”
“
Youar
ever
ydumbi
fyoubel
i
evey
ourownl
i
es.
”
“Look,
itwasami st
ake.ImessedandIam sorr
y.But
areyouseri
ousl
ygoingtotakemykidswi
thy ouso
faraway?Theygotoschool!
”
“Myfatherstay
si nMochudi
.Iwi
l
lgett
hem aschool
bus.40km isnothing.
”
“
Youar
enott
aki
ngmyki
ds.
”
“Iam taki
ngthem wi
th.Youwantt
ogi
vet
hem y
our
diseases?”
“
Canwej
ust
-“
“
Goodni
ght
.Yourv
oicei
sannoy
ingme.
”
Shewalkedthebedroom t
henlockedt
hedoor .At
sil
e
angr
il
ywalkedoutthenopenedtheboot.Helooked
atMiawhohadpassedoutt henshookher.
“
Readyt
otal
k?”
Shebl
i
nkedst
ari
ngathi
m andt
ri
edget
ti
ngout
.
“
Okwill
crushyourfi
nger
switht
hisboot
.Don’
tev
en
t
ryi
t.What’
sthepassword?
”
Shebr
okedowncr
yingst
ari
ngathi
m.“
Pleasel
etme
go.
”
“
Ok,
youwantt
osl
eepi
nther
e.”
“
Atsi
l
epl
ease-
“
Hest
art
edt
ocl
oset
heboot
.
“
It
’sKenny
!Kennyi
sthepasswor
d.”
Hepausedst
ari
ngather
.“WhyKenny
?”
“
Becauseshei
stheonl
ywhowhol
ehear
tedl
ylov
es
me.
”
Hepushedherbacki nsi
dethebootandclosedit
thenwalkedinsi
dehishousetaki
ngoutherphone.
Heunlockeditandwenttohermessagest hen
slowl
ysatreadingt
hrough.

*
**

Meanwhil
eAt si
le’
s15yearoldnei
ghbor
’ssonwho
hadbeenoutsideandsawthewomani ntheboot
sl
owlywalkedinsi
dethegateandopenedtheboot
.
Awomanl ookedathimthenpausedcryi
ng.
“
Hi,
Isawy
ou-
“
Shh…”
Shequi
ckl
yjumpedof
fthent
ookhi
shandandr
an
outoft
hegatewi
thhi
m.
“
Thanky
ousomuch.
”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
It
’sok.
”
“
Don’
ttel
lany
one.Doy
ouhav
eaphone?
”
Het
ookouthi
sphoneandgav
eitt
oher
.Shequi
ckl
y
t
ooki
tandcal
l
edherboy
fri
end.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Babe…Iam sor ry,
Ihadt ogooutoftheoff
iceand
helpKenny ’
sbrotherin-
lawwithsomethi
ngathome.
Ilef
tmyphoneandev eryt
hingel
seattheoffi
ce.He
hasn’tcomebacky etsoIam for
cedtoleav
ehi s
kidswiththeneighbor.Comeandpi ckmeup.”
“
Ok.Iwaswor
ri
ed.Younev
erl
eav
eyourphone.
”
“
UhIwi
l
lseei
ttomor
row.
”
“
Ok,
wher
ear
eyou?
”

*
**

Atsil
ewalkedouti nshockt henopenedt heboot.He
fr
ownednotf indingherthenl ookedaroundbutthere
wasnoonei nsight.Heunlockedherphoneagai n
andopenedawhat sappgr oupwhi chheaddedal l
herboyfr
iends.Hescr eenshor tedall
hermessages
withherboyfri
endsandsentt hem tothegroup.
Het
hought
ful
l
ysentamessage.
‘
Mia’
:Andmaybey
oushoul
dal
sogoandt
estf
or
STD’
SandHIV.
Hel
eftthegr
oupanddel
etedi
tthenwal
kedback
i
nsi
dethehouse.

*
**

Maatl
awatchedasNamet sopackedherbagswhi
l
e
acarwai
tedforherout
side.
“Iam goi
ng.Ican’
tbel
i
ev eIwastedmyti
mewi thy
ou
allt
heseyearswhenIcouldhavedonealotwit
hmy
l
ife.Youmadememot heryourki
dswhenally
ou
want edt
odowasuseme. ”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
Shecl i
ckedhertonguet hendr
aggedherbags
walkingout.Maatl
al ookedatthecart
henaman
steppedoutandhel pedherputherbagsintheboot
beforetheydrov
eof f.
Maatl
awalkedbackinsi
det
hehouseandcal
l
edEsi
gr
abbinghi
scarkeys.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,Iam comi
ngov
ersowecanwat
chamov
ie.
”
“
Ohok.AndIwasbor
ed.
”
“
Iam br
ingi
ngmyl
apt
op.
”
“
Ok.Iwi
l
lgett
hepopcor
nready
.”
Hepi
ckedhi
slapt
opasLet
habowal
kedf
rom hi
s
r
oom.
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“
Iam goi
ngt
owat chsomemov
ieswi
thy
ourmom.I
wi
ll
seeyoul
ateron.”
“
Arey
ouguy
sget
ti
ngbackt
oget
her
?”
“
Mindy
ourownbusi
ness.
”
Let
habosmi
l
ed.“
Ican’
twai
ttot
ell
Kagot
his.
”
Maat
lashookhi
sheadandwal
kedout

*
**
AtC-SKYhot el,Kennysteppedoutofthecaband
walkedinsi
det hehotelwithasmallbag.Meanwhi l
e
Rona’soldfri
endwhowaswal ki
ngoutoft he
rest
aurantturnedbackwi thafrown.Hedidn’tknow
Rona’swifeupt hatcl
osebuthedef ini
tel
yknewi t
washer .Hetookouthi sphoneandcal l
edRona.
“
Sur
eJomo!
”
“Iam sogladyouarethissi
de,Ihav
esomet hi
ngto
discusswithyou.Ij
ustsawyourwifegett
ingi
nsi
de
thehotel
,i
fy ouarealr
eadyi
nsidepleasecomeout.I
willwai
t.
”
“
Huh?
”
“Iam C-
SKY.Ij
ustsawyourwi
fewal
ki
ngi
n,ar
eyou
alr
eadyinsi
deorwhat
?”
“
Yousawmywi
fewher
e?”
“
AtC-
SKYhot
el.
”
“
Arey
ousur
eit
’sher
?”
“
Yeah.
.ar
eyouher
e?”
“
Wai
tther
eIam comi
ng.
”
“
Ok.
”

*
**

Ronagotupandt
ookhi
sphonecal
l
edher
.
“
Babe?
”
“
Hey
,hav
eyouar
ri
vedi
nMaun?
”
“
Yes.Iam onmywayt
othecompanynow.
”
“
Ok.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Hehungupandl
ookedatQ.
“
Iam goi
ng.Comeandl
ock.Don’
topenf
orany
one.
”
“
Ok,
wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“
Iam goi
ngt
oUncl
eAt
sil
e’
shouse.Iwi
l
lbeback.
”
“
Ok.
”
Ronawal
kedoutandgoti
nhi
scart
hendr
ovet
othe
hot
el.
.
.
Remembert
oli
keandcommentaf
tery
our
ead
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#118

Ronapar
kedhi
scaratthehot
elpar
kingl
otthen
st
eppedout
.Hetookouthi
sphoneandcall
edJomo.
“
Rona?
”
“
Ihav
ear
ri
ved.Wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
Neart
heent
rance.
”
Ronalookedatt
heent
ranceandsawhi
mthenhe
hungupandwalkedover
.
“
J-man!
”
“
Eit
ant
wana!
”
Theybumpedshoul
der
sthenJomof
rowned.
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Iam notsur
e.Shesay
sshei
sinMaun.
”
“
May
beIdi
dn’
tseeherpr
oper
ly.
”
“
Noyoudi
d.Ical
l
edherMaunbr
anch,
shei
snot
t
her
e.”
“
Don’
tdosomet
hingst
upi
d.”
“
Don’
twor
ry.Howhav
eyoubeen?
”
“Ihavebeengood.Iwant
edt
otal
ktoyouabout
borrowi
ngsomecashbutdealwi
thyouri
ssuesf
ir
st
thenwewi l
ltal
k.”
“Canweexchangecar
s?Fort
onight
.Iwi
l
lbr
ingi
t
overt
omorrowthenwetal
kabouthowmuchyou
need.
”
Jomolaughed.“
Idr
iveat
inyHondaFi
tandi
t’
sol
d
too.
”
“
It
’sok.Idon’
twantany
thi
ngthatwi
l
lmakehersee
methendecidet
orunaway.”
“MonnaRonadon’ tdowhaty oudidlastti
me.Li f
e
hastaughtmesomet hing.Somet i
mest hebestthing
todoiswalkaway .Walki
ngawayf r
om thesituati
on
i
sthebestthingthatcanev erhappentoy ou.Icould
havegonetojaili
fIdidn’
tlearnhowt owalkaway .
Youhavekids.”
“
Don’
twor
ry.
”
“
Gapeshewasal
one,
may
beshe-
“
Ronatookoutthecarkey
sfr
om hi
spocketand
handedthem t
oJomo.
“
Take,
mycari
sther
e.”
“Ronat
heywon’
tevengiveyouherroom number.
Youknowtheyr
espectcust
omer’spri
vacyalot
.”
“
Iwi
l
lwai
tforherher
e.Don’
twor
ryaboutme.
”
“
EishRona…”
“
Thatwomaninsi
det
hereismywif
e.Themot
herof
mychi
ldr
en.Iwi
ll
befi
ne.Don’
twor
ry.
”
“
Osur
e?”
“
Yes.
”
Hetookt
hecarkey
sandpoint
edathi
sol
dHondaFi
t
handi
ngRonat
hecarkey
s..
“
Ther
eiti
s.”
“
Ok.
”
Hewalkedt
othecarandsati
n,hi
sheartwas
poundi
ngsomuch.Hetookherphoneandcal
ledher
.
“
Heybabe…”
“
Hey
,justchecki
ngi
n.Ar
eyoual
readyi
nMaun?
”
“
Yes,
Iam get
ti
ngi
ntot
her
ent
alcar
.”
“
Flewsaf
elyt
hough?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
KennyIl
ovey
ou.
”
Shegi
ggl
ed.“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
“No,y
oudon’
tunderst
and.Ir
eal
lyl
oveyou.Il
ovey
ou
somuchbabe.Ican’
tbegi
ntoimagi
nemyl i
fe
wit
houty
ou.Youaremywhol ewor
d.”
“
Ilov
eyout
ooRona.Ar
eyouok?What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“Not
hing.Iwasj
ustt
hinki
ngabouthowf
arwehav
e
beencome.”
“
It
’sbeenal
ongj
our
ney
.”
“
Idon’twanttol
osey
ou.Iwantt
odieoldwi
thyouby
myside.Iwanty
ouandItol
eavehi
stor
y.Doyou
wantthat
?”
“
Yes.Ofcause.
”
Henoddedswal
l
owi
ng.“
Ok.
”
“
Arey
ousur
eyouar
eokbabe?
”
“Iam f
ine.Ij
usthav
eafeeli
ngt hat
…thatsomet
hing
badisabouttohappenandallIwanti
sforGodto
givemet hest
rengt
htohandleit.
”
“
Whyareyoutal
ki
nglikethi
s?Not
hingbadi
sgoi
ng
t
ohappen.Wearefi
ne.”
“
Ok.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.Letmest
artt
hismeet
ing.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hehungupandlookedathisphonet
ear
ful
ly
.He
coul
donl
ywonderaboutwhatshewasdoingand
wit
hwhom f
orthewholenight.

*
**

Esi
broughtthepopcor
ntothesi
tt
ingroom t
hengot
i
ntheblanketwi
thMaatlaast
heysatcomfort
abl
y.
“
Youcanpl
ayi
t.
”
Hepr essedplayt
hent hemovi
estart
ed.Hi
sphone
st
artedr i
ngi
ng.Het ookadeepbreathr
eachi
ngfori
t
onthet abl
e.Hefrownedlooki
ngatJomocall
ing.
“
Sur
eJ-
man!
”
“
Ithi
nkImadeami
stake.
”
“
Whatmi
stake?
”
“IsawRona’swi f
eget t
inginatC-SKYhotel
.Shewas
alonewit
hasmal lbag,anoverni
ghtbag.
Immediatel
yIthoughtshewaswi thRonaandIhave
beenwant i
ngtoseeRonaf orawhilenowsoIcall
ed
him andtol
dhim.Seemshi swifesaidshei
sin
Maunandi tlookslikesheischeati
ng.Heaskedus
toexchangecarsandIl efthi
mt here.
”
Maatlal
ookedatEsi
thengotupandwal
kedt
othe
ki
tchen.
“
What
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
AndRonahasbeensuspect
ingitf
orawhi
l
enow.
Hesai
dshewasbehavi
ngwei r
d.Fuck!
”
“
Iam scar
edhemaydosomet
hingst
upi
d.Youknow
howRonai
s.”
“
Fuck!
”
“Pl
easetal
ktohi
m.Hehaskidstothi
nkfor
.
Sometimesyouhav
etot
hinkforot
herpeopl
ewho
dependonyou.
”
“
Yeahuhhl
etmet
alkt
ohi
m.Thanksf
ort
ell
i
ngme.
”
“
Sur
e.”
Hehungupandcall
edRonagoingtoEsi’
sbedr
oom.
Hel
ookedaroundhernewhouseandsighedsi
tt
ing
ont
hebed.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Arey
ouok?
”
“
Yeah.
”
“
Jomocal
l
edme.Rona,
thi
nky
ourki
ds.
”
“Iam t
hinki
ngaboutmyki ds.That’
sal lIam t
hinki
ng
aboutri
ghtnow.Iam alsothinki
ngofmywi fewhom
Ilovewit
hmyall.Sheiswi t
hamani nsidethere.I
fI
tell
herIknowshedidn’
tgot oMaun, shewillmake
upsomet hi
ngsamewayshehasbeenmaki ngup
t
hings.
”
“
Cany
ougohome?
”
“
Shei
sbr
eaki
ngmyhear
t.
”
“
Iknowbutgohome.
”
“Iam notgoingti
ll
Iseewhosheisintherewit
h.I
wanttoseehi m.Kennyi
smarri
ed.Hepr obabl
y
knowsi tandall
heisdoi
ngisdi
srespect.
”
“
Ifyoudoany thi
ngyouaregoingtogotoj
ail
adhe
wil
lremainbehind,
takey
ourwi f
eandfami
lyand
maket hem hi
s.Thi
nkcaref
ull
y.”
“
Iam notgoi
nganywhere!Noonest
oppedy
ouwhen
y
oufoll
owedEsitoTanzania!
”
Maatl
asighed.“
Don’
tgot
ojai
l
.Youhav
eki
dst
o
t
hinkof.
”
Ronadroppedt
hecal
l
.Maatlaputhishandsonhi
s
facet
hengotupandwentbacktothesit
ti
ngroom.
“
Ever
ythi
ngok?
”
Maatl
alookedatEsi
.Shewasfri
endswi
thKenny
andwhatifshet
oldhert
hatRonaknew?Heshook
hi
sheadandsmi
l
ed.
“
Yeah.Let
’swat
cht
hemov
ie.
”
Theycuddl
edont
hecouchwat
chi
ngt
hemov
ie.

*
**

Mial
ookedatherboyfr
iendwhowasjustsi
lent
ly
st
ari
ngather
.Shefixedthetowel
aroundherbody
st
ari
ngathi
m.
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Yout
ell
me.
”
Mi
afr
owned.“
What
?”
“
Hav
eyoubeencheat
ingonme?
”
“
What
?”
“
Hav
eyoubeencheat
ingonme?
”
“
Hav
eyoul
osti
t?Whywoul
dIbecheat
ingony
ou?
”
“
Expl
aint
hist
hen.
”
Hethr
ewherhisphone.Miapi
ckeditupandl ooked
att
heWhatsappmessages.Herheartpoundedso
muchasshereadthr
ough.Sheswall
owedand
l
ookedathi
m.
“It
alkedt
othem andy
ouhav
ebeenseei
ngt
hem
behindmyback!
”
Mi
ashookherhead.“
Icanexpl
ain.I
t’
snotl
i
ket
hat
.”
Heangr
il
ylookedather
.“STOPLYI
NG!
”
Tear
sfi
l
ledherey
es.“
Icanexpl
ainIswear
.Babe-
“
“Idoever
ythi
ngforyou.Yousaidyouwantedto
fi
nishvar
sit
y,Iwai
ted,Iwai
tedwheny ousai
dyou
wanttoestabl
ishyourcar
eer.IputwhatIwant
edon
holdfory
ouMi a!
”
Mi
ashookherheadcr
ying.“
Icanexpl
ain.
”
“
All
theseyearsyouhav
ebeenl
yi
ngt
ome.Igav
e
y
oumyal l
Mi a!
”
“
Ilov
eyou.Il
ovey
ou.I
tmeantnot
hing.
”
“Yousleptwit
hallofthem.It
houghty
ousai
dyou
boughtyoursel
fthecar…”
“
I…babe…”
“
Whatdoy
out
akemef
or?Ani
diot
?”
“
No.No.Il
ovey
ou-
“
“STOPFUCKI
NGLYI
NG!Youl
ovewhatIdof
ory
ou!
Youlov
emymoney.
”
Mi
ashookherheadcr
ying.
“
No…i
t’
snot
…Il
ovey
ouf
ory
ou.
”
Hewal
kedov
erandbegunst
rangl
i
ngher
.
“
Isai
dst
opl
yi
ngt
ome!
”
“
Babe…”
Hestrangl
edherhar derasangert
ookov er.Shetr
ied
topushhim off.Heletgoandmov edback, hands
onhishead.Mi agotupandr anof
fdroppingthe
towel
.Her eachedforthekni
feonthebedandwent
aft
erher.Miaranoutt hr
oughthegat
enakedwhi l
e
hewentafterher.

*
**
AtC-SKYhotel
,Kennywal kedoutofthebathr
oom i
n
hersi
lkygownatt hepresi
denti
alsuit
e.Seanwal
ked
overtoherandhandedhert heglassofwinewhi
l
e
Tank’
s‘whenwe’ play
ed.Shesmi led.
“Thanks.Ican’
tbel
i
eveIhav
enev
erbeenher
e.I
t’
s
beauti
ful.
”
“
Iti
s.Comeandsee.
.”
Hetookherheadandsl i
dopent heglasssl
i
ding
doorthatledtot
hebalcony.Theylookedat
Gaboronef r
om t
hetwenti
ethfloor
.Theycouldsee
ever
ything.
Kennysippedherwinestar
ingathi
m ashe
expl
ained.“
Thishot
el wasonceonl
y10floor
sbuti
t
waslookedintoandtheownerdeci
dedtomakeit
evenl
onger .
”
“I
t’
sbeaut
if
ul.Iwant
edtobui
l
dal
odgei
nShakawe.
Atmygrandmother’
spl
ot.
”
“
Thef
armisbigsoitcanworkbutIwoul
dsuggest
y
ougeti
ntof
arming.Ther
eisalotofmoneyi
n
Agri
cul
turejustthatpeoplearel
azy.Seewhite
peopl
e?Theyhav eaneyef ormoneythat
’stheydon’
t
minddoingitall
f ormoney.Hewillst
ayatthefarm
andweart hosekhakhipantssecuri
ngthebag.Get
i
ntofar
mi ng,beasuppl i
erandyouwi l
lgofar.
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Ok.Iwi
l
llooki
ntoi
t.
”
“
Youshoul
d.Iwasr
aisedbyf
arm money
.Myf
ather
i
safar
mer.”
Hegotcl
oserandkissedher.Natesl
owlyopened
hersi
l
kygownandl ookedatherli
nger
iethentook
thewi
neglassesandplacedthem ont
helitt
letabl
e.
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Youar
ebeaut
if
ul.
”
Kennyl
ookedathi
m andsmi
l
ed.“
Thanks.
”
Hetookof fhergownandleti
tpool
toherfeett
hen
hetookoffherbraandthong.Hepi
ckedherupas
shelaughedthenheplacedheront
hecouchthat
wasont hebalcony.
“
Stayt
her
e..Iam comi
ng.
”
Hewal
kedbackint
heroom whi
l
eshel
ayther
e,a
col
dbr
eezecar
essi
ngherski
n.Nat
ewalkedout
wit
haclothandhandcuf
fs.Kennyl
ookedathi
m
cur
iousl
y.Heki
ssedher.
“Youcanalway
stel
lmet
ost
opi
fyouwantmet
o
stopok?”
Shenoddedt henhecov eredhereyeswi ththecl
oth
beforehandcuff
ingeachhandt oherleg.Kennyl
aid
onthecouchnakedandbl indf
olded,eachhand
handcuffedtoherleg,herheartpoundingwith
excit
ementandwor r
y.
Nat
eki
ssedher
.
“
Rel
ax.
”
“
Ok…”
Heopenedherl
egs.Kennygaspedatt
hesudden
bur
nofcandl
ewax.
“
Ouch!
”
Hesl
owl
ydr
oppedt
hewaxonherni
ppl
e.
“
Ahh….
”
Hecont
inuedwhil
eshetr
iedt
omov eherli
mbs
deal
i
ngwiththeburni
ngwaxonherni
pplesand
surpri
singlyitwasar ousi
ng.Her ubbedof ft
hedri
ed
waxandpoppedani cebl
ocki nhismout hthen
suckedherni pples.Shemoanedsof tl
ybreathi
ng
heavil
yashedi ditforherotherbreasttoo.He
mov edt heicebl ockonherchestgoi ngt oher
stomacht il
l hereachedherpussy…Kennywai ted
forwhathewasgoi ngtodo.
Nat ethrewanot hericebl ockinhismout hlookingat
hert henr eachedfort hewi neandpouredabi ton
herpussybef orehest ar
tedsuckingitoff
,theice
blocki nhismout h.Kennymoanedt r
y i
ngtomov e
butshecoul dn’t
.Thecol dnessandhi smout honher
hadhert oescurli
ng.What everhewasdoi ngtoher
feltstrangeandsogoodatt hesamet ime.He
pour edmor ewineonherpussyandsuckedi tof f
.
Unabl etomov eshel aidthererecei
vi
ngt hepleasure
whi l
emoani ng.
Hermoansgotl ouderwhil
eherphoner anginsi
de
thesuit
ebutwiththemusi c,
noonecoul dhearit.
Nateraisedhi
sheadt henunzippedhi
spantsst ar
ing
atherpussynowgl adtheyhadactual
lytest
ed
becausehewasn’tabouttouseacondom wi t
hher
Withhereyescover
ed,Kennywait
edfort
hatDt hen
shefel
thimrubbingi
tonhersli
t.Nat
elookedather
thi
ckpussywhilehi
sdickgotev
enharderthenhe
#removed.

*
**

Int
hecar,
Ronacont i
nuedtry
ingKennyphonebut
shest
il
lwasn’
tpicki
ng.Hisheartwaspoundi
ngso
muchwhil
etearsdropped.Heknewshewaswi t
h
man.Hewassur eofthat
.
.
.
Let
'shav
ethoset
woot
herbonusest
omor
row
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#119

Miaranintoat horn,
shey elpedjumpingthenquickl
y
yankeditoffandcontinuedr unni
ng.Acarcame
fr
om theotherdirect
ionbrightenedit
’sli
ghtsonher.
Thedriv
erst eppedont hebreaksstoppingthecar,
Miapausedt henamanst eppedout ,
sher ani
ntothe
bushes.
“
Wai
t!Letmehel
pyou.Iwantt
ohel
pyou.St
op!
”
Miastoppedandt urnedtohim ashest oodfeet
fr
om her.Hequicklytookoffhi
st -
shir
tandthrewit
ather.Hetookoffhispushinsandt hrewthem at
her.
“
Dress.
”
Miaslowlypi
ckedthet-
shir
tandputi
ton.Shetook
theshoesandputthem asherl
ipst
rembledwhil
e
herwholebodyshook.
“Mynamei sOraNdiwe,t
akemyphoneandcal
lthe
pol
ice.Di
dy ougetr
aped?”
Sheshookherhead.“
He…hewant
edt
o…hewant
ed
tost
abme.”
“Ok,wecangot
ot hepol
iceory
oucanevencal
l
them.Takemyphone.Youcancal
lsomeonet
o
come.”
Hesl owlywal kedoverandputt hephonedown
somedi stancef r
om herbeforemov i
ngback.Mi a
reachedf orthephoneandi mmedi atel
ydialedher
sist
er.Thephoner angunanswer ed.Shecalledher
againbuti tconti
nuedt ori
ngunanswer ed.Tears
droppedont hescreenassher eali
zedsher eall
yhad
nooneel set ocallexpectfr
om hersister
.
“
Mysi
steri
snotpi
cki
ng.
”
“CanIpleasedropyouoffathomeoratt hepol
ice
stati
on?Ifyoucandri
ve,
y ouwil
ldr
ive.Iam not
goingtodoany t
hingt
oyou.”
Mial
ookedaroundt
hensl
owl
ywal
kedov
er.Hegav
e
hert
hecarkeys.
“
Youcandr
ive.
”
Shel
ookedathi
m,hel
ookedt
otal
l
yhar
mlessandhe
hadaf
ri
endl
ysmi
l
e.Butdi
dn’
ttheyal
ldo?
“
Dri
ve.
”
Miapi
ckedarockthengoti
nt hecar
.Or
alaughed
andj
umpedinatthepassengerseat
.
“
Bat
hongmot
hoot
li
legol
alaampol
ail
e.”
Miaputthebr i
ckonherlapt henst
artedt
hecarand
drove.Or
ai ncr
easedthevolumeoft hemusic.Mia
drovestr
aighttoKenny’
shouseknowi ngpossibly
herboyfr
iendwoul dwai
tforheratherhouset o
fi
nishheroff.Awhilel
atersheparkedthecarin
fr
ontofthegat e.
“
Youst
ayher
e?”
“
Mysi
ster
..
”
“
Ok.
”
Shesteppedoutandrangtheint
ercom.Shewaited
wait
ingforr
esponsebutther
ewasnot hi
ng.Sherang
i
tagainforacoupl
eofmi nut
esthenlookedi
nside.
Ther
ewer enocarsoutsi
de.Shewentbacktothe
car
.
“
Ithi
nkt
heyar
enotar
ound.
”
“Ok,look,youcansl
eepatmyhouse.Iam sur eby
nowy ouknowIam notgoi
ngtodoany t
hing.Getin.
”
Hest eppedoutandlef
tthepassengerdooropenf or
her.Reluct
antl
yMiagotinthecar.Orareversedand
drovet ohi
shouse.Heparkedthecarinsidethe
garage.
“
Let
’sgo.
”
“
Doy
ouhav
eawi
fe?
”
“
IfIhadawif
e,whywouldIbr
ingyoutot
hehouse
whereshei
s?Idon’
thav
e.Let
’sgo.”
Theyslowlywalkedi
nsidethehouse.Mial
ooked
aroundexpecti
ngtoseeawoman, herr
ockinher
hand.Orawalkedtohiskit
chenandcamebackwi th
anokapi.
“
Taket
his.At
tackmei
fIt
ryany
thi
ng.
”
Mi
asl
owl
ygott
hekni
feandputt
her
ockdown.
“
Comeandsi
t.Let
’sl
ookatt
hosewounds.
”
Shewal kedtot
hecouchandslowlysatdown.Or
a
walkedt ot
hebedroomsasMialookedaround
unsett
led.Hewalkedbackwi
thafirstai
dkit
.
Het ookast oolandsatthent ookherl egandl ooked
atthebl oodunderherfeetfrom agl assslici
ng
throughherf l
esh.Heputonhi sglovesandst ar t
ed
treati
ngherwoundwhi l
eshef linchedandf rowned
atthepai n.Hebandagedt hewoundandt ookt he
otherleg.Mi nut
eslaterhestoodupandwal ked
awaywi thhi
sfir
staidkit
.Hecamebackandwentt o
hiskitchenwherehecamebackwi thfood.
“
Eatsoy
oucanhav
epai
nki
l
ler
s.”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
Shest ar
tedeat
ingasheswit
chedonhisTV.She
fi
nishedeati
ngthendr
ankthepai
nki
ll
ers.
“
Come,
youwi
l
lsl
eepi
nmybedr
oom.
”
Shesl
owl yst
oodupandli
mped,nowall
calm,she
fel
tal
lthepai
n.Heopenedthebedr
oom door
.
“
Youcansleepther
e.I
fyouwantt
otakeashower
,
i
nsi
dether
e.”Hepoint
ed.
“
Yougood?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Goodni
ght
.”
Hewalkedout ,t
earsfi
ll
edherey esasshethought
ofev
erythingshehadbeent hroughjustt
oday.She
wasluckyt obeali
ve.Shelookedatthedoorthen
l
impedov erandlockeditwithasigh.

*
**

Thef ol
lowi
ngmor ning,
Atsil
efi
nishedprepar
ing
breakfastt
hensetitupnicel
yast heki
dswatched
TV.Thebedr oom dooropenedthenAprilwal
kedout
.
Atsil
esmi l
ed.
“
Heybabe…Imadebr
eakf
ast
.”
Apr
ill
ookedatt
hefoodsi
l
entl
yandpour
edhersel
f
or
angejui
cebef
oregoi
ngbacktot
hebedroom.

*
**

I
nthebedr
oom,
Apr
ilt
ookasi
poft
hej
uiceand
conti
nuedpacki
ngherbags.Herphoner
angf
rom
thebedthenshepi
cked.
“
Aunt
y..
”
“
Hi mygi
rl.Yest
erdayIreceivedacall
from your
f
ather
.Hewasv eryangryandmadaty ourhusband.
Hesaidyoucall
edhim cryi
ngbecausey ourhusband
i
scheati
ngandgav eyoudi seases.
”
“
Eemma.
”
“Iknowy ouarecl
osetoyourfatherbutyouknow
sometimesy oucancal
lme.Iam mar ri
ed,Ihave
beenaroundmar ri
edpeopl
eforal ongti
me.Iknow
suchissues,maybeImightshinesomelighttoyou.
”
“
Eemma,
Iwasgoi
ngt
ocal
l
.”
“
It
’sal
ri
ghtmygi
rl
.Howar
eyoudoi
ng?
”
“
Iam ok.
”
“Iknowy ouarehurti
ng.It
’sonethi
ngt
ohavehim
cheatony ouandit’
sanotherforhi
mtobr
ingyou
diseasesfrom out
side.
”
“
Iam sohur
tandhear
tbr
oken.
”
“Iknow.Eachmar
ri
agehasi
t’
sowni
ssues,
somei
t’
s
evenworse,hewi
l
lbri
ngachi
ld.
”
“
Idon’
tknowi
fIcanst
ayi
nthi
smar
ri
age.
”
“
That
’sunder
standabl
e.Soy
ouwantadi
vor
ce?
”
“Il
ovehim butIcan’
tdothis.Atsi
l
edoesn’
trespect
me.Howcoul dhebringdiseasestomeandmy
chi
ld?”
“Youar eangr yrightnow.What every ouar esay i
ngis
i
nf l
uencedbyanger .Idon’ tl
ikepeopl ewhomake
decisionsangr ybecauset heywi llalway sregretand
startcryi
ngagai n.I fgoi ngbackt oy ourf ather’
s
housei st hebestopt iony ouseef ory ourself
,doit
butsomet imesr unningawayi snott heopt i
on.You
aregoi ngt okeephur tingy ourselfbecausey ouwi l
l
bewonder i
ngwhathei sdoingandwi thwhom.At
thispointy ourhealthcomesf i
rst.Focusony our
pregnancy ,
leavethoseot herthings,focusont he
baby .Whydoy ouhav et ogoandl eav eyourhouse
whenhei st heonewhomessedup?I sn’
tthathouse
alsoy ours?”
“
Iti
s.”
“Theywhydoy ouhav et oleav et hecomf ortofy our
homewheny oudi dn’tdoany thingwr ong?I fIwer e
youIwoul dst ay .Stayandt akehi sbankcar ds,akere
odirabobel etekamadi ao.(Hei swhor ingwi th
moneyi sn’tit?)Takeev ery t
hingf rom him, att hi
s
stagehei spr epar edtodoany thing.Taket hebank
cards,takethecarkey s,at samay ehelakacombi
j
akamabel eteamangwe.( Lethi m useacombi li
ke
otherwhor es.)Youst opi roningf orhim, l
ethim wear
withthatwr inkledshi rtandpant st owor k.Don’ t
cookf orhim, lethim cookf orhi mself.Lewenaev ery
ti
mey oul eav et hehouse, l
ookhot .Doesn’ tmat terif
youarepr egnant ,
lookhott hathewi llstartthinking
youarecheat ing.Kanacheat i
ngpeopl ear eal way s
i
nsecur ebecauset heythinkev eryonei sdoi nglike
theyaredoi ng. ”
Apr
ill
aughed.
“Yes!Nowhewon’ tevenhav emoneytobuyhimself
dinnerandletmetellyou,nowomanwi l
lwanta
mar r
iedmanwi thnomoney .Takeawayallt
hose
niceshir
tsyouboughthi mforwork,
thoseshoesyou
bought,packthem andputthem away.Atni
ght
whenyouaresleepi
ng,swi
tchof
ftheTVandt ake
t
hatcodethatconnect
stheTVtothedecoder.Take
i
twit
hy outobedthenswit
choffyourl
i
ghts.
”
Apr
ill
aughedev
enhar
der
.“Aunt
ymma!
”
“Lethim str
uggle.Don’
tev enfeelsorryf
orhi m.
Whenhi ssalaryreport
s,obv i
ousl
yit’sgoingtot he
bank,wenagoandgety oursel
fexpensivet hi
ngsand
spendit.Orbetteryet
,cashi tandtransferitt
oy our
secretaccount.Whenheasksf ormoney ,t
ellhi
m he
shouldaskf r
om hisgirl
fri
end.That’swhatIwoul d
doifIwer eyou.ButIam notsodowhaty ouf eeli
s
ri
ght.Youwi l
ltellmewhaty ouhav edecided.”
“
Emma.
”
Shehungup.Apr
ill
ookedatherbagsthenputt
hem
backint
hewardr
obe.Atsi
l
ewal kedi
nandlookedat
her.
“
Babe-
“
“Kekopadi
keyt
sakol
oi.(
Pleasegi
vemet
hecar
keys.
)”
“
Ok.
.”
Hequi
ckl
ywal
kedoutandcamebackwi
tht
hem.
“
Ther
e.”
“
Tanki
.Letmeseey
ourwal
l
et.
”
Hetookitoutfrom hispocketandgavei
ttoher
.
Apri
lopeneditandtookoutal lt
hecar
dsleav
inghis
I
denti
tyCardandaf ewmoneynot est
hengaveit
back.
“Goshar
p.Youcanl
eavemybedroom.Youare
suf
focat
ingme.Onkgabobel
etehel
aebil
enkare
nkakgwa.”
At
sil
elookedatherconf
usedt
hensl
owl
ywal
kedout
.

*
**

AtC- SKYHot el,

KennymoanedasNat ef uckedher
i
nsi detheshower .Heheldtheshowerheadonher
pussyasi tsplashedwateronherwhi l
ehebanged
herf r
om behi nd.Shecurledhertoeslostincloud
nineandspasmed.Nat egav eherthelastpowerful
thrustfreezinginsideherwhilehi
sdickspur touthi
s
cum fi
ll
i
ngherupy etagai
n.Hecl
osedthewaterand
putbacktheshowerheadandsli
dout.Hetur
nedher
aroundandkissedher.
“
Yougood.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Yes…”
Theycl
eanedupandwal
kedoutnaked.Kenny
l
ookedatthet
imeonNate’
sphone.
“
Myf
li
ghthasl
anded.Ishoul
dgetgoi
ng.
”
Hesmil
edpull
i
nghercl
oserki
ssi
ngher
.“Iwi
shy
ou
di
dn’
thavet
ogo.”
“
Ireall
yhav
eto.Ronawil
lbewai
ting.Af
terthose
missedcal
l
s,Ir
eall
yneedtogohomeand- “
Nat
eleanedoverandki
ssedhersl
i
dinghi
sfi
nger
s
bet
weenherpussy.
“
Iknow…”
Hepushedhi
shandof
f.“
Letmedr
ess.
”
Theybothdr
essedup.Shel
ookedather
sel
font
he
mirr
orandst
aredatthebr
uises.
“
Oh.
my.
God.
”
“
What
?”
“
Howam Igoi
ngt
oexpl
aint
hebr
uisesand…shi
t!
”
“Don’ty
ouhav efoundat
ion?Coveritupwit
h
foundati
on.Iwil
lgetyouacream thatyouwil
luse.
Theywilldi
sappearinadayortwo.”
“
Ok.
”
Kennytookherfoundat
ionandcover
edthebruises.
Shelookedatherneckandcover
edthehickeys.
“
Lookwhaty
oudi
dtomyneck.
”
Nat
elaughed.“
Sor
ry.
”
Shecov
eredi
tupt
hensi
ghed.
“
Ok,
let
’sgo.
”
Theytookthei
rthi
ngsandwalkedoutlaughi
ng.They
walkedoutofthehotel
andwalkedovertoNate’
s
carashekissedher.
“
Stop!
”
Heki
ssedheragai
nwhi
l
eshel
aughed.
*
**

Meanwhile,Rona’
sheartpoundedsomuchashi s
enti
rebodyshiver
edwhilehestaredathiswif
e
ki
ssingaman.Theygoti nthei
rcarlaughi
ng.Rona
steppedoutandrushedover.

*
**

Kenny
’shear
tski
ppedasshel
ookedatRona.
“
OhmyGod!Rona!
”
“
Fuck!
”
Natel
ockedal
ldoor
sasRonaappr
oachedt
hedoor
bangi
ngthewi
ndow.
“
Open!Kenny
!!
Kennyl
ookedathi
m shaki
ng.
“
Kenny
,let
’sgohome!
”
“
OhmyGod!
”
Ronabangedthewindow.“
Kenny!Babel
et’
sgo
home.Please…If
orgi
veyou…let
’sgohome.”
Nat
est
art
edt
hecar
.
Ronal
ookedatt
hem astear
sfi
l
ledhi
sey
esand
rol
l
eddownhischeeks.
“Babeplease…let
’sgohome.Iwon’ tdoanyt
hingt
o
you.Iswearonourkids.Pleaselet’
sgohome.I
forgiv
eyou,Yousaiditwouldcomeat i
meIwould
hav etof
orgi
veyou.Iforgi
vey ou.Let
’sgohome.”
Kennyputherhandonhermouthcryi
ng.Nat
e
l
ookedather.“Don’
tli
stent
ohim.Heisgoi
ngtohur
t
you,t
rustme.Heisgoingtohur
tyou.
”
“
Ihav
etogo.
.”
“Kennyli
stentome.Heisgoingtohurtyou.Hei
s
goingtokil
lyou.I
tmeanshef oundoutsomehow
andheknows.Lethim cool
downf i
rst
.Youknow
howhei s.
”
Nat
est
art
edr
ever
sing.Ronaj
umpedont
hebonnet
.
“
Babel
et’
sgohome.
”
Nat
est
eppedont
hebr
eakst
henRonaf
ell
off
.Rona
gotupandlookedatNatedri
vi
ngoff
.Heranbackt
o
theHondaFitandtookof
ffol
lowi
ngthem.Hi
s
phonerang,
hepickedwit
honehand.
“
Rona,
wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
Theyar
edr
ivi
ngof
f.Ihav
etogether
.”
Maat
lasi
ghed.“
Fuck!Rona,l
ist
entome.Iknowyou
ar
ehurt
.Youareangrybutt
hinkfort
hef
uture.
”
Heov er
tookcars,hi
shear
tpoundingsomuch.He
knewshehadsl eptwit
hhi
m, f
rom thoseki
ssesby
hiscarhejustknewshehadsleptwit
hhim andi
t
brokehim.
“
Rona,
cal
m down.
”
“Heiswi
thher!Hesl
eptwi
thmywi
fe!TheoneIpai
d
bri
depri
cefor
!Sheismywife!
”
“Youneedtocal
m down.Wewi
l
ldeal
wit
hhi
m.Ri
ght
nowstopfoll
owi
ngthem.”
“Shei
swit
hhi
m.Ij
ustwantus…Iwantust
ogo
home.”
“
Rona!
”
Ronadr oppedt hecallandst eppedont he
acceler
atorthreecar sbehindasNat edr ovethrough
theoranget r
afficli
ghtthenitturnedr ed.Ronaov er
tookthecar sinfrontofhimt or unt hrought her ed
traf
fi
clight.Abigt r
uckt r
anspor ti
ngcar scamef rom
hisri
ght,Ronat urnedhisheadast het ruckdriv
er
punchedt hehoot ersteppi
ngont hebr eaksbuti t
wasal r
eadyt oolate.Hecr ushedi ntot hetinyHonda
fi
t.

*
**

Kennygaspedstari
ngt
hroughtherear
viewmi r
roras
theHondafitr
oll
edgoi
ngoffroadandfelli
ntoa
dit
ch.
“
NO!
”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#120

Nat
ecur
sedasheal
sowat
chedt
heHondaFi
t
l
andi
ngt
hedit
ch.
“
Fuck…”
“
No…no…St
opt
hecar
!”
“
Letmet
aket
henextt
urnanddr
iveback.
”
“
STOPTHECAR!
”
“
Cal
m down-
“
“Don’
ttel
lmetocal
m down,myhusbandi
sdyi
ng
andyoutell
metocalm down?STOPTHECAR!
”
Hest oppedt hecaront hesi deoft
heroad.Kenny
openedt hedoorandr anbackascar shootedather.
Shet ookof fherheelsrunningtohiscaraspeople
stoppedt heir
swat chi
ng.Sheappr oachedthedit
ch
andlookedatt heHondaFi tlyi
ngheaddowni nthe
di
tch.Tear sfil
ledhereyes.Peoplewer eal
ready
gatheri
ngast heystoodthereunabletodoany t
hing.
Nateappr
oached.Hel
ookedatt
heHondaFi
tbadl
y
cr
ushed.“
Shit
!”
Kennyjumpedinsi
dethedit
chandl
ookedatt
hecar
,
shelookedathi
m unconsci
ousi
nsi
de.
“
Babe…babe!
”
Shet
ri
edopeni
ngt
hedoorbuti
twasst
uck.
“
Nthuseng!(
Hel
pme.
)”
Twomoremanj
umpedi
nsi
deandt
ri
edopeni
ngi
t
buti
twasj
ammed.
“
Itwon’
topen.
”
Kennyl
ookedatRonacr
ying.“
Please.
.pl
easehel
p
hi
m.
Apoli
cecarwhi
chwaspassingbyimmediately
st
oppedthent
wopoli
ceoff
icerswalkedov
er .
“
Mov
eback!
”
Kenny ’
stear
sroll
eddownhercheeks,itf
eltasifshe
wasi namov i
e,sheconti
nuedtry
ingtoopent he
door.Nateapproachedasthepoli
ceoffi
certri
edto
pul
lherback.Hej umpedinthedit
chandpulledher.
“
Lett
hem hel
phi
m…”
“
Hei
sdy
ing!
”
“
Hey
…hesgoi
ngt
obef
ine.
”
“
Rona!Babe!
”
Natepickedherupandcar r
iedheroutoft hedit
ch
asshescr eamedcr yi
ng.Thepoliceof f
icerstri
ed
openingthedoor sbuttheywerejammed, t
heymade
phonecallswhilepetr
ol l
eakedfrom thecar .The
tr
uckdriverapproachedandputhi shandsi nhis
headstaringattheHondaFi t,
itwasbey ond
damagedt hati
twouldbeasur priseifanything
surv
ived.
“
Godno!
”

*
**

Maatl
atri
edRona’snumberagainbuti
twasn’
tgoi
ng
t
hroughanymore.Esil
ookedathim.
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Kennyi
scheat
ing.
”
“
Who?
”
“
Kenny
.”
“
Kennywoul
dnev
ercheat
.”
“Shei
s.Shet ol
dRonashewasgoi ngtoMaun
yest
erdaythenJomospot tedheratahotel
herein
Gaborone.Ronawaitedforheratthehot
elandsaw
herwithaman, sheevendroveoffwit
htheman.”
“
Idon’
tbel
i
evey
ou.
”
“
Askher
.Shei
scheat
ingonRona.
”
“
God…”
“Ihopehedoesn’
tdoany
thi
ngcr
azy
.Hi
snumberi
s
notgoingt
hrough.
”
“
Letmet
ryKenny
’s.
”
Esit
ookherphoneandcal
ledKenny,herphoner
ang
unanswer
ed,shehungupandsighed.
“
Ican’
tbel
i
eveKennywoul
dcheat
.”
“
Peopl
echange.
”
“
It
’sunl
i
keher
.”
Maat l
asighed.“Ij
usthopeRonaknowsi fhedoes
anythi
ngst upi
dhei sgoi
ngtogotojai
l.Kennywil
l
probablyfuckhim evenmorei
nRona’sabsence.”
Maat
la’
sphoner
ang,
hishear
tski
ppedashepi
cked.
“
Hell
o?”
“
Maat
la,
hav
eyouhear
dany
thi
ngf
rom Rona?
”
Hesi
ghed.“Ei
shJ-man,
Ispoket
ohim moment
sago
andi
tseemedKennywasoutwit
hthemanandhe
waschasi
ngaftert
hem.
”
“
Soshei
sreal
l
ycheat
ing?
”
“
Shei
s.”
“
Eish,
gomaswe.(
It
’sbad.
)”
“
Yah…onceIt
alkt
ohi
m,Iwi
l
llety
ouknow.
”
“
Sur
e.”

*
**
AtOra’
shouse,
Mi awalkedoutofhi
sbedroom,Or
a
smil
edwalki
ngfrom hi
skitchenhol
dinghi
scupof
cof
fee.
“
Hey
,cof
fee?
”
Sheshookherhead.“
No.Iam f
ine.Ij
ustwantt
ogo
home.”
“
Ok.Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?
”
“
Muchbet
tert
hanky
ou.
”
“
Iwi
l
ldr
opy
ouof
f.
”
“
Ok.
”
Heputhi
scof
feedownandt
ookt
hecarkey
s.
“
Let
’sgo.
”
Theywenttohisgaragewherehiscarwaspared
andgotin.Or
astart
edt hecaranddroveof
fasshe
dir
ectedhi
mt oherhouse.Awhi l
elat
erhepar
ked
thecar.
“
Ist
hisi
t?”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Yes.
”
“
Ok.What
’sy
ourname?
”
Mi
asmi
l
ed.“
Mia.
”
“
OkMi
a,keepsaf
e.”
“
Thanky
ousomuchf
oral
lyoudi
dyest
erday
.”
“
It
’sok.By
e.”
Shest eppedoutwithasmi l
eandwal kedinsidethe
gate.Shewentt oherbackyardwhereshet ookt he
sparekey sthenunl
ockedthedoorandwal kedin.
Shelockedt hedoorandsighedgoingt oherroom.
Shet ookabat ht
henchangedi nt
oaj eanshor t
sand
atopt hentookherotherhandbagandwal kedout
goingt oworktogethercar.Acarstoppedbesi de
herasshel i
mpedhol di
nganumbr el
l
a.
“
Hey,wakaekadi
nao?(
wher
ear
eyougoi
ngby
f
eet
?)”
Mialookedatt
hedri
verwhowassmil
i
ngather
,a
gol
dweddi ngr
ingonhi
sfi
nger
.Shesmil
ed.
“
Iam goi
ngwher
eyourwi
fei
snott
her
e.”
Helaughed.“
Tsenakegodr
ope.(
Geti
nletmedr
op
youoff.
)”
“
Idon’
twantt
obebeat
en.Ican’
tfi
ght
.”
“
Tsena.(
Geti
n.)
”
Shesmiledt
henwal
kedr
oundhi
scarandgoti
nthe
expensi
vecar
.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Wakae?
”
“
Kenny
’sEv
entandTr
avel
Management
.”
“
Ok,
what
’sy
ourname?
”
“
Mia.
”
Thedri
versmil
edst
ari
ngatherbeauti
ful
smile.“
You
shoul
dn’
twalki
ngMia,
especi
all
ywithaninj
ury.
”
Mialaughed.“
Whatshoul
dIdowhenIdon’
thav
ea
car
?”
Hi
seyesfel
lonhert
highst
henhesmiled.
“
Somethi
ngcanalwaysbeworkedout
.Iam Ti
m.”
Shesmil
ed.“
Nicemeet
ingy
ou.Thanksf
orgi
vi
ngme
ali
ft
.”
“
Nahi
t’
sokbabygi
rl
.”
Mialookedathi
spregnantst
omachthatt
ouched
thesteer
ingwheel
.Hereyeswentt
ohisbaldhead.
Helookedwayolderthanher
.Ti
m par
kedatKenny’
s
Event’
sandTravel
thenMiasmil
ed.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Letmet
akey
ournumber
.”
“
Idon’
thaveaphone.Igotr
obbedy
est
erdayt
hat
’s
whyIam hur
t.
”
“
Youknowwhat,l
et’
sdoonethi
ng.
”Hetookouthi
s
wal
l
etandcount
edacoupleofnot
es.
“
Getaphone.
”
Mi
acount
edt
heP200not
esandsmi
l
ed.
“
It
’sP6500.
”
“Goandgetaphone.
”Hehandedherhi
sbusi
ness
car
d.“Theny
oucallme.Ri
ghtMia?
”
Miasmil
ed.“
Iam sor
ryIcan’
ttakei
t.Ihav
ea
boyf
ri
end.
”
“
So?Cal
lmel
ater
.By
e..
”
“
ByeTi
m.”
Hedroveaway,
sheshovedthemoneyinher
handbagandwalkedt
owardstheent
rance.

*
**

Qfi
nishedpr
epar
ingbr
eakfastf
orhi
ssibl
ingst
hen
hedi
shedandputever
ythi
ngonthetabl
e.
“
Guy
s!Comeandeat
.”
Theywalkedfr
om thesi
tt
ingr
oom andsatdownon
thedi
ningtabl
e.Lar
ryl
ookedathi
solderbr
other
.
“
Wher
eismamaanddaddy
?”
“Daddyl
eftear
lyi
nthemor
ning.Hehadt
ogo
somewhere,mamaisal
mosthome.”
“
Ok.
”
Thekidsst art
edeat
ingwhil
ehewentt othesit
ti
ng
room andst art
edcl
eani
ng.Hesweptthenmopped
beforetakingouthi
sri
ngingphone.Helookedathi
s
unclecall
ing.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Q,ar
eyourpar
ent
shome?
”
“
No.Dadleftl
astnightt
henhadabreakdownonhi
s
waybackhome,Ithinkhewi
llhomesoonwith
mama.”
“
Ok.Buty
ouguy
sar
eok?Youandt
heki
ds?
”
“
Yeswear
efi
ne.
”
“
Let
haboi
scomi
ngov
er.
”
“
Yes!
”
Maat
lal
aughed.“
Wewi
l
ltal
k.”
“
Byeuncl
e.”
“
Sur
emyboy
.”
Thekidsfi
nishedeati
ngt henwentbackinf rontof
theTVwat chi
ngcartoons.Hetooktheirplatesand
washedthem inthekit
chen.Whenev erythingwas
cleanandinorder,
hewentt ohisbedroom wher ehe
l
ayonhi sbeddiali
nghiscrush.
Sheanswer
edsof
tl
y.“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,Iwant
edt
oaskaboutt
heMat
hshomewor
k.”
“
Ok.
”
“Idon’
tunder
standhowwear
esupposedt
obe
doingi
t.”
Shechuckl
ed.“
Buty
ouar
ethesmar
testi
ncl
assQ.
”
“
Iknowbutt
hist
imear
oundIam l
ost
.”
“Ihopeyougetl
ostl
iket
hati
nthet
estsot
hatIcan
dobettert
hanyou.
”
Ql
aughed.“
Keepdr
eami
ng.
”
Shestart
edexplai
ningashesmi ledli
steningtoher
voi
ce.Shehadsmoot hsof tvoice,hejustlovedt
he
wayshet al
ked.Hehadl i
kedsincet hefirstdayt
hey
metthoughhest i
l
lcouldn’
tbr i
nghi mselftosay
anyt
hingaboutarelat
ionship.Shef i
nished
expl
aini
ng.
“
Eish,
Ist
il
ldon’
tgeti
t.
”
“Youcancomeover
.Iam al
oneathome,It
hinkI
canexpl
ainmor
ewhenwedoi ttoget
her
.”
“
Whatabouty
ourpar
ent
s?”
“
Theywentt
oaweddi
ng.
”
Qsmi
l
edj
umpi
ngont
hebed.“
Ok,
Iam comi
ng.
”
“
Youknowwher
eIst
ay?
”
Hecaughthi
msel
faboutt
osayy
es.“
No.Youcan
di
rectme.
”
Shest
arteddi
recti
nghi
mt henhef
inal
l
yendedt
he
cal
lj
ustasLethaboWalkedin.
“
Qmyman!
”
“
Heysssup?Iam goi
ngtodomyhomeworkatmy
f
ri
end’
shouse.Iwil
lbebacki
nacoupl
eofmi
nut
es.
”
“
Uhhdoesy
ourf
olksknowaboutt
hat
?”
“
No.Buty
oudo.
”
Hegrabbedhisbooksandputonhissneaker
sthen
spr
ayedhisperf
ume.Lethabol
aughed.
“I
fyouhav
esex,someonei
sgoingt
ogetpregnant
.
Youwil
lpr
obabl
ygotojai
l,
thel
awdoesn’
tfavor
men.”
“
Iam nothav
ingsex.
”
“
Good.Youhav
eanhour
.”
“
Shar
p.”
Her
ushedout
.

*
**

Kennywat chedastheyremovedthecardoorand
tookRonaout ,t
heparamedicsonstandby.Theygot
him out
,Kennylookedatthebloodonhist-shi
rt
bit
ingherlowerli
pcryi
ng.Theparamedics
i
mmedi atelygothi
m.Theyputhimint heambulance
thenitt
ookof f
.Natetookherhand.
“
Let
’sgoaf
tert
hem.
”
Theygotinhiscarwhichwasnowpar kednear
by
anddroveofffol
lowi
ngtheambulance.Herphone
rang,
shelookedaroundthent
ookitfrom behi
ndher
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Kenny
,what
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Ronawasinvol
vedi
nacaracci
dent
.Wear
eheaded
t
othehospi
tal
.”
“
Jesusno…”

*
**

Atthehospit
al,
theywaitedasthedoct
orsatt
ended
tohim.Kennycouldn’
tstopseei
ngtheacci
dent
play
inginherhead,sheputherhandsonhercry
ing.
Natelookedather.
“
Hei
sgoi
ngt
obeok.
”
Shel
ookedathi
m cr
ying.“
Idi
dthatt
ohi
m..
”
“
Hedrovethr
oughtheredt
raf
fi
cli
ght
.Anacci
dent
wasboundtohappen.
”
“Becausehewaschasi
ngafterus.Ishoul
dhavenot
haveli
stenedt
oyouandjustwentwi t
hhim.”
“Hewasgoi
ngt oki
lly
ou.Yout hi
nkhewasj ust
goi
ngtofor
giveyouli
ket hat?Natesi
ghed.“Iknow
youar
epanicki
ng.Butjustrelax.
”Heleanedover
andki
ssedher.
Maat
lal
ookedatt
hem ki
ssi
ng,
hisangershotup
t
henhewal
kedov
erandpul
l
edNat
epunchi
nghi
m.
.
.
Don'
tfor
gett
oli
keandcomment
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#121

Kennyqui
ckl
ygotupasMaat
lapunchedNat
e.
“
Otl
wael
amasepawenasaan!
”
Esipul
l
edKennyf r
om thefi
ghtasNat
etri
ed
punchi
ngMaat l
abackbuthedodgedandpunched
hi
m again.Esi
walkedoverandpul
l
edMaatla.
“
Stop,hedidn’
tbr
inghi
msel
fher
esoit
’snothi
sfaul
t.
Heisnottheonemarri
edt
oRona.”
Nat
est
eppedbackwi
pingt
hebl
oodof
fhi
snose.
“
Otl
i
legony
elawena.
”
Nat
ecl
i
ckedhi
stonguet
henl
ookedatKenny
.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
“
Go.
”
“
Kenny
-“
“
Pleasego.
”
“
Cal
lme.
”
Hetur
nedandwalkedawayasMaat l
aglar
edathi
m.
Esi
walkedov
erandlookedathersadl
y.
“
Whathappened?
”
Kennyl
ookedatEsi
tear
ful
l
y.“
He…-
”
“
Isthi
swhatyoumeantwheny
ousai
dyouwoul
d
t
eachhim al
esson?
”
Kenny
’st
ear
srol
l
eddownhercheeks.
Esisighed.“Youev enbri
ngy ourboyfri
endher e.
Ronai sf i
ghti
ngforhisli
feandy oubringy our
boyfriend.Youmaywantt ofixhim,hurthim but
don’ty outhi
nkit’
stoomuchnow?Doy ou…”Esi t
ook
adeepbr eat
h.“Doy ouhav etobri
nghi m here?You
couldhav egoneonwi t
hy ourli
fe.
.Imean…whaty ou
want edhappened.Whatmor edoy ouwant ?
”
“
I.
..
-”
“
Ihopei
twaswor
thi
t.Ir
eal
l
yhopei
twasKenny
.”
“
Ilov
emyhusband.Imadeami
stake.
”
“Anaffai
rhasneverbeenami stake.I
fithappened
thaty
oumetNat etodayandsl eptwit
hhimt he
samedayandi mmediatel
yregr et
ted,
itcouldhave
may bebeenami stake.Youtookyourti
me,caref
ull
y
plannedouteachmov eyoumade.Youmadeupt he
l
ieofgoi ngtoMaunwheny ouwerearound,wentto
ahot elandsleptwithyourboss.Thesamebossy ou
oncecompar edhi mt o.Youarenotsorr
ybecause
yousl eptwi
thhim, youaresorryyougotcaughtand
thatRonagothur t.That’
sall.
”
Atsi
lewalkedov
er,
pani
cinhi
sey
es.“
What
happened?”
Maat
lasi
ghed.“
Hegothi
tbyat
ruck.
”
“
Wher
ewashecomi
ngf
rom?
”
Maat
lashr
ugged.“
Idon’
tknow.
”
Atsil
elookedatKennywhowassi l
entl
ycryi
ngthen
hesighed.Esil
ookedatherthenshookherheadand
stoodwithMaatla.Not
ici
ngnoonewascomf or
ti
ng
her,hewalkedoverandhuggedher.
“
It
’sgoi
ngt
obeok.Ronai
saf
ight
er.
”
Kennypressedherl
i
pstry
ingtoholdhercr
yinbut
shebrokedowncryi
ng.Atsi
l
erubbedherback.
“
It
’sgoi
ngt
obef
ine.
”
EsiandMaat
lasatdownhol
dingeachot
her
unmovedbyhercri
es.

*
**

Tshenol
osmi l
edasPusofi
xedhersat
ell
i
tedish.
Pusosteppeddownthel
adderwit
hasmi l
e.
“
Done.
.”
“
Thanks.
”
Hepul
ledhercl
oserandkissedher
.“Youar
e
wel
come.Didyoutel
lyourex?”
Tshenol
onoddedwi
thasmi
l
e.“
Hei
shappyf
orme.
”
“
Wel
lthent
hat
’sgoodr
ight
?”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Yes.
”
“Howaboutt
his,
thekidsalr
eadyknowwear
efri
end,
howaboutwegot oOkavangotomorr
ow?Al
lofus.
”
Tshenol
osmi
l
ed.“
Ok.
”
Andr
eawal
kedoutt
henTshenol
omov
edback.
“
Hey
…”
Andr
easmi
l
ed.“
Thanky
ouf
orf
ixi
ngoutTV!
”
Pusosmi
l
ed.“
Youar
ewel
comef
ri
end.
”
“
Bye!
”
Shewalkedbackinsidethehouse.Pusogave
Tshenol
oonelastkissandj umpedovertohi
syar
d
whil
eTshenol
owal kedinsidethehouse.
Herphoner
angasshest
art
edpr
epar
ingbr
eakf
ast
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Ronai
sinhospi
tal
…”
“
What
?Whathappened?
”
“
Iwentwi
thNateatt
hehot
eland…Ronaf
oundout
.
Hewaschasi
ngusandhe-
“
“
Oh…hef
oundout
?”
“
Iam scar
ed.
”
“Whyareyouscar
ed?Youshouldn’
tgetscared.
Kennyyoudeci
dedtocheatandrev
engey our
husband,
what’
syourpr
oblem now?”
“
Idi
dn’
tmeanf
or-
“
“Youdid.Youmeantf orittohappen.Idon’ tev en
underst
andwhyy ouar ecr y
ing.Youshoul dnotwor ry
aboutRona, hemi ghtaswel ldieandIam sur eit
won’tbotheryout hatmuch.Mov eonwi t
hy ourNate.
Youlongwant edhim.Ify oucall
edt r
yingtogetany
sympathyf r
om mef orgetit
.Youmadey ourchoice,
didn’
tli
stentoany one.Youmadey ourdecisionnow
goandcel ebratewithy ourboyfri
end.Youcannow
fuckhimi npeace.Noneedt osneakar ound.”
“
I…By
e.”
Shehungup.Tshenol
oshookherheadt
henst
art
ed
prepar
ingherki
dsl
unch.

*
**

Miainser
tedanewsim car
di nhernewphone.She
swit
chedonthephonethenregi
ster
edthesi
m card.
Wit
hasi ghshedi
aledKenny’
snumber.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,it
’sme.Wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
Iam att
hehospi
tal
.”
“
What
’swr
ong?Whathappened?
”
“
It
’sRona.
”
“
Whathappened?
”
“
Hewasinv
olvedinacaracci
dent
.Wear
est
il
l
wai
ti
ngf
orthedoctor
.”
“
Iam comi
ng.
”
“
Thanks.Iwoul
dappr
eci
atei
t.
”
“
Whi
chhospi
tal
?”
“
GHP.
”
“
Iam comi
ng.
”
Shestartedhernewcaranddr ov eoffheadedtothe
hospit
al.Mi nuteslatershesteppedouti nhershort
s
andlit
tl
el acet opthatshowedabi tofherstomach
thenwalkedi nsi
dethehospital.Shelookedather
sist
erstandi ngallal
onewhi l
eheot her
’sconsol
ed
oneanot her.Shewal kedoverandhuggedher .
“
Hey
…what
’sgoi
ngon?
”
Kennyl
ookedathert
ear
ful
l
yandbr
ief
lyt
oldhert
he
st
ory.
“
Ist
hatwhyt
heyar
est
andi
ngf
arf
rom y
ou?
”
“
It
’smyf
aul
t.
”
“
Youdidn’
tfor
cehi
mtocr
osst
her
edt
raf
fi
cli
ghtdi
d
y
ou?”
“
Mia…”
“No!Whyar
eyoubei
ngisol
atedasi
fyourt
oldhi
mto
crosst
hetr
aff
icl
i
ghtWhenitsaysr
ed,y
oustop.
”
Thedoct
orwal
kedov
er.Theyal
ltur
nedt
ohi
m.
“
UhIwoul
dli
ket
ospeakt
ohi
sfami
l
y.”
Maat
laclear
edhist
hroat
,hi
sar
m ar
oundEsi
.“We
ar
ehisfamil
y.”
Mi
apul
l
edhersi
stercl
oser
.“Thi
sishi
swi
fe.
”
Maatl
aclickedhist
ongue.Mi
achuckl
edt
ryi
ngt
o
cont
rolhersel
f.
“
Ok.
.uht
hegoodnewsi
sthathesuf
fer
edf
rom
Acutespinal cordi njury,atraumat i
ci njuryt hat
brui
ses,par ti
all
yorcompl etel
ytear shespi nal cord,
i
nhi scase, part
iall
y .Inhiscase, theinjur yisl ower,
i
t’
sint helumbarv er tebr
ae.Hei sgoi ngt ohav el
oss
offuncti
oni nthel egsandl owerbody ,par apl egi
a.
Heisv eryluckyt ohav esufferedani ncompl ete
i
njurymeani ngt her eisstil
lsomedegr eeoff eeli
ng
ormov ementbel owt helevelofthei njuryt houghhe
i
smai nlytosuf ferf rom lossofv oluntar ymuscl e
mov ementi nthel egs. ”
Kennysni
ff
ed.“
Cani
tbet
reat
ed?
”
“HisSCIismi l
dsoy es,wear egoingtoputhim
undertreatmenttohel pdecreaset heswelli
nginthe
spinalcordandotherpr ocedur eswewillexplai
n
thoroughlyindet
ail.Physicaltherapyi
sgoingt obea
veryimpor t
antpartofhisheal i
ng, hewi
llhaveto
wor kwithaspecialistt
ohel pretainmuscle
mov ement .
”
Esi
sighed.“
Howi
sthatgoodnews?
”
Thedoctorsi
ghed.“
Becausethebadnewsi
st hathe
st
ayedforminuteswit
houtoxygent
othebr
ain,we
managedt oresuscit
atehi m buthehadsuf fered
headi nj
uri
est hatl
edt obr ai
nhemor rhage.We
stoppedthebl eedi
ngbutatt hemomenti t
’sdiff
icul
t
totel
l howser i
ousorsev erehi sbrai
ninjuri
esare.
Youshoul dpreparey ourself.It’
snotlookinggoodon
hisside,t
hechancesofhi sbr aindyi
ngar ehigh.In
thi
scase, hemi ghtormi ghtnotev erwakeup.I fhe
does, hewill
bev eryluckyt ohav emadei t
.”
Maatl
alookedatKenny
.“Theny
ouhav
ethener
vet
o
br
ingyourboyf
ri
endhere.
”
Miaturned.“
Don’tyoudarepointfi
ngersatmysi st
er!
Wheny ourbrot
herwasmi ssi
ngmysi st
er’slaunch
weeksbackcheat i
ngnoonesai danything.Noone
for
cedhimt ocrossredrobot
s!Redr obotsmean
youfuckenstop.Nooneheldthegunt ohishead,
maybehadhest ayedhomeandact uall
ywai tedfor
hertocomeback, nothi
ngofthissortwoul dhave
happened.”
Esil
aughed.“Whyam Inotsur
pri
sedt
haty
ouwoul
d
saysomethingl
iket
hat?”
“
Don’
tbe,
youar
eful
lofpr
etenseMoesi
.Yout
hinkI
don’
tknowwhatasnakey
ouar
e.”
Kennypul
l
edMi
a’
shand.“
Mia!
”
“No!Everyoneherewantt ohavesomet hi
ngt osay
huh?Bl amemysi sterforyourbrother’
saccident.Oh
she’
ssuchawhor ebl ahblah.Iwil
lexposey out oday.
Every
oneher ehastheirowndi r
tyconfession.Maat l
a
don’
ty ouev endare,youhadanent i
remineout side
yourmar ri
age,youaret helastper
sont ojudge.”
SheturnedandlookedatApr il
thensmiledturni
ngt o
herhusband.“
Iwillkeepquietbecausey ourwif
ei s
pregnantandIwil
lnotber esponsi
bleforherlosing
thatbabytostr
essbutdon’ tt
ryme.Youar egoing
topayforwhatyoudi d,
trustme, y
ouhav emessed
withthewrongone.”
“
Youar
e-“
“Don’tMoesi!Don’t
.Youthi
nkyouar
eallthathuh?
Innocentandshitnowthatyouar
egett
ingbackwi th
yourwhor i
ngman?Wazhat oldme.Shetoldmet he
enti
retrut
h.Shet ol
dmewhaty oudi
d.ShouldItell
them oryouwi l
l
?”
Esi
lookedatMi
a,herhear
tpoundi
ngwhi
l
eev
ery
one
st
ared.
“
Ok…si
ncey
ouwon’
ttal
k.Iwi
l
ldot
het
alki
ng.
”
“
Mia!
”
“NoKenny .Thisi sint
erest
ing.Iam sur eyoutoowi l
l
wanttoheart his,youneedt oknowt hatyouhav e
beencaringanent i
resnakeiny ourhandbagt his
enti
reti
me.Doy ouknowasaw- scaledv i
per?It
’sa
veryver
ydanger oussnake, t
hewor ld’sdeadli
est
snake.Youhav ebeenhav i
ngi ti
ny ourbagt hi
s
enti
reti
me.Ev er yoneli
stenandl etmet elly
ouabout
thi
ssnakeher e…”
.
.
Don'
tfor
gett
oli
keandcomment
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#122

Mi
alookedatev
ery
oneast
heyst
aredather
.
“Di
dyouknowt hatMsI nnocenther
eoncewanted
Ronaorsti
ll
want shi
m?Wazhasai dthet
imeRona
cameoutforjai
l,
MsI nnocentherewastouchi
ng
Rona’
sdick.
”
“
That
’snott
rue.
”
“
Wazhahasnor easontoli
eEsi.Shegainsnot hi
ng
f
rom itbutIwill
callherandjustyouknow..conf i
rm
t
hest ory
.May beIam lyi
ng.Younev erknowt hese
t
hings.”Miatookouthernewphoneanddi al
ed
Wazha’snumberbyheadandputi tonloudspeaker.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Ma,
howar
eyou?
”
“
Iam goodmybaby
,howar
eyou?
”
“Iam f
ine.Iwantedt
oasksomethi
ngt
hat’
sbeen
bother
ingmef orawhil
enow…rememberthet
ime
y
ousawEsi
touchi
ngRona’
speni
s?”
“
Mia,Isaidyoushouldl
etthatgo.Itwil
ldestr
oyal
ot
morethanyouknow.Brotherhood,yoursi
ster’
s
marr
iage.Somethingsarebetterburi
ed.
”
“Ar
ethey?Kanay
anongEsi
’
sloy
alt
yisnot
guar
anteed.
”
“Ir
epr
imandedher.I
thappenedyearsback.Leene
RonaIspoketohi
m andheexplainedhimself
.Esi
andKennyarecl
ose,shemadeami st
ake.
”
“Iam sur
e.Justt
hattouchi
ngy
ourfr
iend’
s
husband’
sdicksti
ll
havemequesti
oningher
.”
“Letitgo.It’
si nthepast.Let’
smov eon.Ronasaid
hewasact uallyshockedshewoul ddot hat
consideri
ngshei shisbrother’
sexbuthepr omi
sed
tohav ewar nedher .KanaMi awhent hiscomesout ,
doy outhinkMaat l
awi l
lunderstandthatitwas
actuall
yhisexwhoi sinthewr ong?Hewon’ twaitt
o
l
istenandact ual
lyunderstandwhathappened.Do
yout hi
nkKennywoul dwaittolist
enthatit’
sactual
ly
notherhusband’ sfault
,youalreadyknow
communi cat i
oni nthatmar r
iageisnotthatgood.No
needtodestr
oyfamil
ies.Somethi
ngsar
ebetterl
eft
al
one.Letthepastr
emai ni
nthepastmygi
rl
.”
“
Youar
eri
ght
.Iwasj
ustaski
ng.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
“
Uhl
etmeattendt
osomet
hing.Iwi
l
lcomeandsee
y
oul
ateron.
”
“
Okmygi
rl
.”
Miadr
oppedthecal
l.“Andladi
esandgent
lemen,
t
herewehaveit
.Int
eresti
ngisn’
tit
?”
Kennyl
ookedatEsi
.“I
sthatt
rue?
”
“Wazhadidn’
tseeproper
ly.Kanashewasi nsi
dethe
house,wewereoutsi
deint hecar.Iwastal
ki
ngto
Ronaholdi
nghishand.Shet houghtshesawme
touchhim.It
ri
edto-“
“AHHH!Stoply
ing.Snake.Youwant
edRona,you
probabl
ysti
l
ldo.Whatki ndoff
ri
endshi
pist
hat?”
Thedoct
orclosedhismout
hthenshookhi
shead
al
soshocked.“Uhhoneofy
oucangoandseehim.”
“
Iwi
l
lseehi
m andwi
l
ldeci
deot
her
wiseonwhoel
se
wil
lseehim.Ronaismyhusband,Iwi
l
lmake
deci
sionsonhisbehal
f.Thanky
oudoctor
.”
“
Youar
ewel
come.
”
Kennyl
ookedatEsi
.“Wel
l
,ifyouwi
l
lexcuseme,
I
wil
lgoandseemyhusband.”
Shetur
nedandwal
kedawayf
ight
inghert
ear
s.Esi
l
ookedatMia.
“
Soy
ouandWazhahav
epl
annedt
o-“
“Warawaray ouaremaki
ngnoiseyousnake.Iam
donetal
king.Let’
sseei
fhesti
llwantsyouaft
ert
his
butmaybe…y ouareagoodli
ar,youcanli
eyourway
outoftr
ouble.”
Miasatdown.Maatl
alookedatEsi
thenwalkedout
whil
eshefol
lowedbehindhi
m.Apri
llookedather
.
“
Pleasesaywhaty
ouwant
edt
osay
.”
Mi
arai
sedherhead.“
Apr
il
,gohome.Yourhusband
wi
l
ltel
lyout
here.
”
Apri
ll
ookedatAt
sil
e.“
Atsi
l
ewhati
sshet
alki
ng
about?
”
“
Idon’
tev
enknow.
”
“
Miakeagokopa,
tel
lme.
”
Miasi
ghed.“
Apri
l,gohomeandr est
.Iam notgoi
ng
t
ocarr
ytheguil
tyofthatbabydy
ing.
”
Mial
ookeddownatherphonet
henApr
ilwal
ked
away
.Atsi
lel
ookedatMia.
“
Yout
hinky
ouar
esmar
t-
“
“Idon’
tthi
nkIam smar t
.IknowIam smar t
.Yousee,
yourui
nedmyr elat
ionshi
p,exposedme.Itwasf un
andall
.It’
sok.Let’
sseeifyourmarri
agewillsur
v i
ve.
Iwasn’tmarr
iedtoanyonesoIhav enot
hingt ol
ose.”
“Mymar riagewil
lsurv
ivebecausemywi f
eandI
actuall
yloveeachotherunl
ikeyou.Al
lthosemen
arejustusingyou.Youarenothi
ngbutapr ost
it
ute.
”
Miasmi l
ed.“
Usingme?Noonei susingme.Ifthey
werejustusi
ngme, theywoul
dn’tbespending
thousandsofpulasonmet r
yingtokeepmehappy .
Got oyourwif
ethatyousodearlylov
eandcomf or
t
her.
”Shestoodupandpul l
eduphershor t
s.“Bye!”
“
Youar
egoi
ng-
“
“Ngng,hol
don.Letmerecor
dyout
hreat
enmesoI
canrepor
tyouni
cely
.”
“Youthinkthi
sisfunnyandall
,youar
enotgoi
ngt
o
bebeaut i
fulf
orev
er.Youaregoingt
odieof
diseases.
”
“
Whyar
ey ouconcer
nedbywhatIdo?Pl
easegot
o
y
ourwi
fe.
”
Heclickedhistongueandwalkedaway.Mia
i
nstall
edf acebookthenl
oggedinkeepi
nghersel
f
di
stracted.

*
**

Maat
lal
ookedatEsi
asshegoti
nthecar
.
“
Did…-
”
“Wazhafai
ledtoseeproper
ly.Iwouldnevertouch
Rona’sdi
ck.Shedidn’
tseeproper
ly.Shewasi nside
thehouseandwewer etal
kinginthecar.Iwasj ust
tel
li
nghimthatheshouldtr
eatKennywi threspect.
”
“
Youar
ely
ing.
”
“
Maat
la,
whyonear
thwoul
dIt
ouchRona’
sdi
ck?
”
“Becausey
ouhaveal
waysli
kedRona.Ij
ustt
hought
i
twasbecauseyouguysar
ealmostthesameage
and…wow!”
“
Maatl
a,doIl
ookli
ket
het
ypet
obei
nappr
opr
iat
e
wi
thy
ourbrot
her?
”
Hel ookedatherangr
il
y.“
Youtel
lmebecauseI
knowWazhaandshei snott
hetypet
ogoar ound
spreadingl
ies.
”
“
It
’snot
-“
“Otl
ogaont
enakamaakaMoesi
!(Youar
eaboutt
o
pi
ssmeoffwit
hyourl
i
esMoesi
!)
”
Tear
sfil
ledEsi
’
sey
es.“
Theydi
dn’
tseepr
oper
lyI
swear.
”
“Youarelyi
ng!IknowRonamusthav ekeptqui
et
becauseheknowswhatt hi
swoul dhavedone,
if
ther
eisanyonemor eloy
ali
nt hi
sworld,i
t’
smy
brot
her.Youont heot
herhand…”
“
Maat
lal
i
stent
ome.Wazhadi
dn’
tsee-
“
“Wazhadoesn’tl
ie.Ift
hereisawomanwhoi s
brut
all
yhonestintheentir
ewor l
d,i
t’
sthatwoman.
Shewouldneverut t
erli
esthathavepotent
ial
to
causemoredamaget hanever.
”
“
Maat
la-
“
“
Lesagonkakel
aMoesi
!(St
opl
yi
ngt
omeMoesi
.)
”
TearsrandownEsi’
scheeks.“
Isweart
heydi
dn’
tsee
proper
ly.Iwoul
dnever
-“
“
Getoutofmycar
.”
“
Maat
la-
“
“
Getoutbef
oreIdosomet
hingst
upi
d.”
“Maat
lapleaselist
entome.Babeplease…it
’snot
whatyouthink.Kekopaonnelesebakaketlhal
ose.
(Gi
vemeachancet oexpl
ain.
)Iwasn’tt
ouching
Rona’
sdickIswear .
”
“
Thenwhywoul
dRonat
ell
Wazhat
hathewar
ned
y
ou.”
“
Idon’
tknowwhat
-“
Maat
lal
eanedov
erandopenedt
hedoor
.“Getout
!
AndhereIt
houghtwewer
ebegi
nni
ngt
owor
k
somethi
ngout
.”
“Youarenotl i
steni
ngtome.Peasel i
stentome.I
didn’
ttouchy ouryoungerbr
other’
sdick.Iwould
neverdot hat
.Youknowmebet ter.Ididn’
ttouch
Rona’sdick,whydon’tyouwaittoaskhi m.”
“Iwil
ltal
ktoyout hen,aft
erIaskhi m.WhatIknowi s
thatWazhadoesn’ tl
ie.Shenev erli
es.I
fshedidn’
t
seeproperl
ythenshewoul dhav esaidso.I
fshe
saysshesawy out ouchRona’ sdickthenshedid.I
am mor esadthanIam angr y.May beyoualways
wantedRonaal ong.”
“Don’tsaythat
.Iloveyou.I
fIdidn’
tloveyouIwould
havel ongmarriedSeanbutIdi
dn’t
.Don’tdothis.
Pleasecalm down.Wewi ll
askRona.Iknowf r
om
outsidethecaritcoul
dhavelookedlikeIwas
touchinghisdickbutIdi
dn’t
.IswearIdidn’
t.Iwas
holdi
nghi shand.”
Maatl
asil
entl
ylookedather.Esi
steppedoutofhi
s
cart
earf
ull
ythentookherhandbag.
“
It
’soki
fyoudon’
twantt
obel
i
eveme.
”
Hewatchedherasshewal
kedawayt
henhebur
ied
hi
sheadonhisface.

KennylookedatRonaconnectedtomachi
nesas
theybeepedsteadi
l
y.Tear
sf i
l
ledherey
es.Shehel
d
hishandandclosedhereyescryi
ng.
“
Iam sor
rybabe…”
Shelookedathi
m.“Iam sor
ryIj
ustwant
edy
out
o
feel
whaty oumademef eel
…Iam sor
ry.
”
Itwaspr
ett
yobvi
ouseveryonewasgoingtohat
eher
andhewasprobabl
ygoingtodi
vorceher.
“
Ilov
ey ou.I
twasneveraboutl
oveIswear
.Youar
e
t
heonlymanIlove.
”
Shecaressedhisf aceandkissedhi
sforehead.She
wasscared,scaredhewoul dnevercomehomeback
toherandtheirkids.Sheknewshewouldn’tli
vewith
hersel
fcouldanythinghappentohim.Sheclosed
hereyesandtriedt opray
.
“Godpl
easesavemyhusband.Pl
easehavemercy
onhim andspar
ehi
sli
fe.Hehaski
dsthatneedhi
m.
Hehasal ottoli
vef or.Thereisnor easontoli
stento
mebecauseIam si nnerbutforhiskidspleasesave
him…”Herl i
pstrembl ed,shefeltevenashamedt o
beprayi
ng, notafterallshehaddone.Shedoubt ed
evenGodwoul dlistentoherpr ayer
s.Sheopened
hereyest r
yingnott ocrybutseei nghiml y
ingthere
knowingifitwasn’ tforherhewoul dn’tbether
e
brokeher.Shewasn’ tevensurehowshewasgoi ng
tofacetheki dsandt ellt
hem thattheirfat
herwas
fi
ghti
ngf orhisli
fe.
Awhi
l
elat
ershewal
kedoutwi
pinghercheeks.
Mi
ast
oodupcar
ryi
ngasmal
lpl
ast
ic.“
What
’st
hat
?”
“
Someant
ibi
oti
cs.
”
“
Forwhat
?”
“
Itdoesn’
tmat
ter
.Howi
she?
”
“Hei
sconnect
edt
omachi
nes.Iwantt
oseehi
s
doct
or.
”
“
Hewi
l
lbef
ine.
”
Sheswal
l
owedandnodded.
*
**

AtSadi
’shouse,
Sadi andQfini
sheddoingt
hehome-
workandevenstudiedfort
hetestt
heywouldwri
te
onMonday.Sadiclosedthebookswit
hasmi l
e.
“It
hinkwehav estudi
edenough.Wantanot
herglass
ofdrink?Kanapapahaswine,wantt
otastei
t?”
Qsmi
l
ed.“
Yeah.
”
“
Letmepourf
orus.Ihav
enev
erdr
anki
tbef
ore.
”
“
Met
oo.
”
Shetookthei
rgl
assesandwalkedtothekitchen
whereshecamebackwi t
hthewineinglasses.She
smil
edsit
tingwi
thhim onherbed.“
Cheers!”
Ql
aughed.“
Cheer
s.”
Theyt
ooksi psofthebitt
ert
ast
ingt
hr oatbur
ning
winet
henf rowned.Theybur
sti
ntolaughtert
aking
moresips.Looseningup,Ql
ookedather .
“
Youar
ebeaut
if
ul.
”
Shel
ookedathi
m andsmi
l
ed.“
Thanks.
”
“
Ireal
l
yli
key
ou.
”
Shegi
ggl
ed.“
Ili
key
out
oo.
”
“
CanIki
ssy
ou?
”
Sadi
lookedathi
m.“
Idon’
tknowhowt
oki
ss.
”
“
Idon’
tknowt
oo.
”
Sheputherglassdownandlookedathim ashegot
cl
osert
ohergul pi
ngdowntheremainingofhi
swine
andmadeaf unnyfacet
hatshelaughed.
“
Dri
nky
our
stoo.
”
Sadipickedherglassanddr ankt
oo.Theylaughed
thenhel eanedoverandki ssedherli
kethevideoshe
alwayswat ched.Aft
eraf ewsecondsofbot hof
them confusedandbi t
ingeachot her
,Qgotthehang
ofit
.Hepausedt hensmiled.
“
Fol
l
owwhatIam doi
ng.Let
’st
ryagai
n.”
Heleanedov erandki ssedheragain,Sadifol
l
owed
sui
t.Taki
ngi tslow,heki ssedherevenmor e,
itf
elt
goodhedi dn’twanttost op.Sadiputherhandson
hi
sneckwhi letheirhormonesr aged.Hegotont op
ofherlay
ingheront hebedashi sdickgothardin
hi
spant
s.Hest
oppedandl
ookedi
nherey
es.
“
Hav
eyouev
erhadsex?
”
Sadi
shookherhead.“
Idon’
twantababy
.”
“
Idon’
ttoobutIwantt
otr
yhav
ingsex.
”
Sadil
ookedathi
m.“
Shoul
dIbr
ingy
oumydad’
s
condoms?”
“
Yes.
”
Sadir
ushedoutt
hencamebackwi
thonecondom.Q
tooki
tthenr
eadthebackofi
t.
“
Weshoul
dbef
ine.
”
Sadi
lookedathi
m.“
Shoul
dIt
akeof
fmycl
othes?
”
“
Nowai
t.
”
Heputthecondom downandtookoffherclot
hes
forher
.Outofal
lthepor
nhehadwat ched,hehad
sli
ghti
deaofwhathehadtodot otur
nheron.He
openedherl
egsandlookedathersmoothpussy.
“
Youshav
e?”
“
Mymot
herboughtmehai
rremov
er.
”
“
Ok…”
Heopenedherlegsandpar tedherpussyl ips.He
l
eanedoverandgentlysuckedher .Sadiraisedher
headandwatchedhiml i
ckingherpussy .Sheputher
headdown,i
tfeltgoodashekeptdoi ngit.She
sl
owlymovedherwai stashecont inueddoi ngit
.No
onehadevertouchedherpussyj usthim and
whatev
erhekeptdoingf el
treal
lynice.
“
Itf
eel
sni
ce…”
Heconti
nued…hert
oescur
ledasi
tgotwayt
oo
good.
“
It
’sr
eal
l
yni
ce…”
Sheclosedhereyesfeel
i
ngsomethinghappeni
ngt
o
her
,thenicenesshadpeaked.Qr
aisedhi
shead.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
Shenoddedsl owlyopeni
nghereyesandstar
eathi s
handsomef ace.Hetookthecondom t
hentookout
hi
sdi ck.Sadilookedatit
,itwasbi
gsheevenf eltshy
star
ingatit.Heopenedt hecondom wi
thhisteeth
andputi tonlikehealwayssaw.Thecondom fithim
pr
oper
ly,
heopenedherl
egsst
ari
ngatherpussyand
#r
emoved.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#122
#r
emov
ed

Heopenedherlegsandpar tedherpussyl ips.He

l
eanedoverandgentlysuckedher .Sadiraisedher
headandwatchedhiml i
ckingherpussy .Sheputher
headdown,i
tfeltgoodashekeptdoi ngit.She
sl
owlymovedherwai stashecont inueddoi ngit
.No
onehadevertouchedherpussyj usthim and
whatev
erhekeptdoingf el
treal
lynice.
“
Itf
eel
sni
ce…”
Heconti
nued…hert
oescur
ledasi
tgotwayt
oo
good.
“
It
’sr
eal
l
yni
ce…”
Sheclosedhereyesfeel
i
ngsomethinghappeni
ngt
o
her
,thenicenesshadpeaked.Qr
aisedhi
shead.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
Shenoddedsl owlyopeni
ngherey esandst ar
eathi s
handsomef ace.Hetookthecondom t hentookout
hisdick.Sadilookedatit
,itwasbigsheev enf eltshy
star
ingatit.Heopenedt hecondom wi thhisteeth
andputi tonlikehealwayssaw.Thecondom f ithim
properly
,heopenedherl egsstar
ingatherpussyand
kneltbeforeherthenheleanedov erandkissedher
again.
Hepausedthentookhi sdi
ckandpressedathertiny
hol
e,matt
eroffactthatwasbarelyahole.Sadi
l
ookedathimfeeli
ngt heuncomfort
abl
epr essur
e.
“
Byt
heway
,Ihear
dit
’spai
nful
.”
Sadinoddedtaki
ngadeepbr eat
hli
keshealwaysdi
d
beforeherf
atherwouldwhipher
.Qpushedharder
tr
yingtofor
cehisdickinasSadil
ookedathi
m wit
h
afrown.Hetookoffthecondom.
“
Letmet
rywi
thout
,Iwi
l
lputi
tbackon.
”
“
Ok.
”
Heopenedherl egswiderandpushedhiserect
cir
cumciseddickonherent r
ance.Tear
sfi
ll
edSad’
s
eyesashert i
nyholestr
etchedsomuchwhi l
ehe
forcef
ull
ytr
iedpushinginbit
inghisl
owerl
ip.
“
Q!I
t’
spai
nful
.”
“
Justasec…i
t’
sbecausewehav
en’
tdonei
tbef
ore.
”
Thepai nbroughtbyherpussyst r
etchingwasso
muchherl ipstrembledasshel ookedathi m.Tears
fel
l,usingsomuchmor eforce, hepushedt heti
pin.
Sadiscreamedi npainthenbrokedowncr yi
ngwhil
e
Qgaspedf eel
ingherpussycl enchhi m.Shewas
warm andsof tt oo.I
tfel
treal
lygoodhef ound
himselfbreathingheavil
ythenhest aredather.
“
Shh…heyl
ookatme.
.don’
tcr
y.”
“
It
’spai
nful
.”
“
Iam sor
ry.Iwi
l
ljustdoonceandst
op.St
opcr
ying.
”
“
Justonce.
”
“
Yes.Once.
”
Sadil
ookedathim pr
essingherli
pstogethert
ryi
ng
nottocrybutthepai
nwast oomuchshecoul dn’
t
hel
pit.Hepushedabitmor eofthatdi
ckstari
ngas
herpussystr
etchedwrappi
ngitsel
faroundhim.I
t
wasfascinat
ingtowatch.
“
Wow!
”
Shestar
tedcr
yingal
itt
lelouder
.“Qi
t’
spai
nful
.We
shoul
dstop.I
t’
stoopainf
ul.”
“
Shhh…Ok.wewi
l
lst
op.Shhh…peopl
ewi
l
lheary
ou.
”
Heslowl ysli
doutandthr
ustagain.I
tfel
tsogoodhe
couldjustdieathowgooditfel
t.Herpussycl
enched
hisdickgivi
nghim somuchpleasurehehadnever
experiencedbefor
e.
“
Q…”
“
Justonesecond.Pl
easedon’
tcr
y.”
“
It
’spai
nful
.Wewi
l
ldoagai
nnextt
ime.
”
“
Onesecond.Pl
ease…Onel
astt
ime.
”
Herockedint
oherslowlyusi
ngonlyquart
erhisdi
ck
andgaspedasthepleasur
eintensi
fi
ed.I
tfel
ttoo
goodtostop,wayt
oogood.
“
Justbreat
h…slowlyok.Don’tpani
c.Rel
ax.Ihear
d
t
hepainstopsonceyourelax.”
“
It
’st
oopai
nful
.”
“
Ok…onl
astt
ime.
”
Hedippedbacki nagainshaki
ng.Hethrusty etagai
n
whil
eshecri
ed.Hercr iestol
dhimtostopbuti twas
j
usttoogoodf orhi
m.Hehel dherlegsopen
thr
usti
ngingentlybel
ievingi
fhediditslowlymay be
shewouldn’
tfeelsomuchpai nandact ual
lyfeel
whatshewasf eeli
ng.
“
Q,l
et’
stakeabr
eak.I
t’
stoopai
nful
.Let
’sst
op.
”
“
Ok…onel
astt
ime.
”
“
Youhavebeensayi
ngt
hat
.It
’st
oopai
nful
.Idon’
t
l
i
keyouanymore.
”
Her ecal
l
edt hear t
icl
ehehadr eadthengentl
y
rubbedherclitgentlypushi
ngthatdicki
nandout .
Hechangedangl estryi
ngtogetmor ecomfort
able
thenSadifrownedashi sdi
cktapedsomethingnice.
Shewasn’ tsurewhati twasbutitf
eltni
cethough
thepainwasst il
lthere.Wit
hhisthumbstimulat
ing
hercl
it
,shefel
tthi
snicenesst
hathadherpause
cry
ingandjustst
areathim.
“
Isi
tni
cey
et?
’
“
Ng…”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Real
l
y?”
“
Ng…buti
t’
sst
il
lpai
nful
.”
Sadibreat
hedheav il
yashecont i
nuedthatnicespot
overandov eragainthatshegotmorewet
l
ubricat
inghisdick.Shemoanedsof t
ly,
thepl easur
e
gett
ingtoogoodwi t
heacht hr
ust
.Qmov edev en
fast
erwhileherpussyl ubri
cat
edhim makinghi m
sli
pinandoutmor eeasily
.
Sadi closedherey esasthepleasur
etookov erher
enti
rebody .Ql etgoofherclitbadheldherhips
feel
ingt henicenessintensi
fyi
ng.Hethrusthisenti
re
dickinsideherandgav eheracouplemor estrokes
thenst oppedashi sdickpumpedhi scum insi
deher
grunting.
“
Jesus!
”
Her
emai
nedbur
ieddeepi
nherf
orasecondt
hen
sl
owlysli
ppedout.Sadiwi
nced,Qlookedather
pussyathi
sdickcoveredi
nbloodandsomewhi te
stuf
f.Shetear
ful
l
ylookedathim.
“
Sor
ry.Weshoul
dbat
h.”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#123

((
htt
ps://
www. facebook.com/gr
oups/31670316891
2088/-t
heremov edhasbeenpost edatthegroup
underannouncement s,
clickt
heli
nk))
….Hethr
usthisentir
edicki
nsideherandgavehera
coupl
emorestrokesthenst
oppedashi sdi
ck
pumpedhiscum insi
dehergrunti
ng.
“
Jesus!
”
Heremainedburi
eddeepinherforasecondthen
sl
owlysli
ppedout.Sadiwi
nced,Qlookedather
pussyathi
sdickcoveredi
nbloodandsomewhi te
stuf
f.Shetear
ful
l
ylookedathim.
“
Sor
ry.Weshoul
dbat
h.”
Shenodded.Hehel
pedherupthenfr
ownedst
ari
ng
att
heli
ttl
ebloodst
ainonherbedcover
.
“
Weshoul
dwasht
hat
.”
“
Ok.
”
Sheslowlywal
kedtothebat
hroom whereQfil
l
ed
thebatht
ubwit
hwaterli
kehealwaysdidwit
hhis
sibl
i
ngsthenhegotinsi
dewit
hher.
“
Arey
oui
npai
n?”
“
Ng…”
“
Sor
ry.Doy
ouhav
epai
nki
l
ler
s?”
“
Iwi
l
ldr
inkmymot
her
’s.
”
“
Ok.Yousai
dyoudon’
tli
kemeany
mor
e.”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Youwer
ehur
ti
ngme.
”
“
Sor
ry.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Soy
oust
il
ll
ikeme?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Arewenowboy
fri
endandgi
rl
fr
iend?
”
Sheshyl
ysmil
edl
ooki
ngdown.“
Ithoughty
oul
i
ked
Rat
anang.”
Qshookhi
shead.“No,shei
sjustni
ceandwear
ein
Sci
encegr
ouptogether
.”
“
Butshei
sal
way
swi
thy
ou.
”
“
Icanst
opbei
ngf
ri
endswi
thher
.”
“Yes.Gapeyoushoul
dstopshar
ingyourfoodwit
h
her.Aker
eshealsobri
ngsfoodf
rom herhouse.
”
“
Iwi
l
lshar
ewi
thy
oui
nst
ead.
”
Sadi
smi
l
ed.“
Ok.
”
Qspl ashedherwi thwater.Thenshelaughed
splashinghim back.Awhi lel
atert
heyfini
shed
cl
eani ngthebat hr
oom thenQputonhi sclothes
whileSadi putonadr ess.Thegateopenedthena
cardr ovein,Sadipeakedandsawherpar ents
steppingoutoft hecar.
“
Mypar
ent
sar
eher
e!”
Q’
shear
tski
pped.“
Ist
her
eabackdoor
?”
“
Yes.
”
Qquicklytookhisbooksthenhepickedt
hecondom
andit’
swr apperonthefl
oorassheledhi
mtot he
backdoor.Sheopenedthedoorforhim.
“
Iwi
l
lopent
hegat
eagai
nwhent
heygeti
nsi
det
he
house.
“
Ok.
”
Sheclosedthedoorandr ushedt oherroom wher e
shetookoffthestainedduvetandpausedst ar
ingat
thepi
eceoft hecondom wr apper.Shekickedit
underthebedthent ookherduv ettot
hel aundr
y
room asherparentswalkedin.
Sadibrav
elywal
kednor
mall
yignor
ingt
hepai
n
betweenherl
egsandsmil
edatherpar
ent
s.
“
Heybaby
..
”
“
Himama.
”
Herdadhandedheracakeonaser
viet
te.“
Pri
ncess,
l
ookIbroughty
ouacake.”
Hermot
herl
aughed.“
Youmeany
oust
olet
hecake?
”
“
Any
thi
ngf
ormydaught
er.
”
Sadi
smi
l
ed.“
Thanky
oudaddy
.”
Hermothert
ouchedherwethai
r.“
Sadi
wee,
you
shoul
dn’
tgetyourhai
rwet
.”
“
Sor
ry.
”
“Wewi l
lgotothesal
ontomor
rowsoy oucanpl
ait
.
Didn’
tauntywashyourduv
etl
astweek?”
“
Itgotst
ained.
”
Hermot
hernodded.“
Ok.
”
Herparent
swenttotheirbedr
oom t henshet ookt
he
gateremoteandopenedthegate.Shel ooked
thr
oughthewindowasQr anoutthenshecl osedt
he
gateandsatdowneatinghercake.

*
**

Kennyparkedhercarinf
rontofherhousethen
steppedoutandwalkedin.Thetr
ipl
etst
urnedtoher
thengotupscreaminghuggingher.
“
Heyguy
s!”
“
Mama,
wher
eisdaddy
?”
“
Uhh…wher
eisQ?
”
Lethabowal
kedfrom t
heki
tchenhol
dingat
rayof
j
uicefort
hekids.
“
Aunt
y…”
“
Heymyboy
.Wher
eisQ?
”
“
Hewentt
orev
isewi
thaf
ri
end.
”
Kennyf
rowned.“
Whatf
ri
end?
”
“Iam notsur
ebuthesai
dthef
ri
endi
shav
ingt
roubl
e
sohei shel
pinghi
m.”
Kennyt
ookhi
sphonet
ocal
lhi
mjustashewal
kedi
n.
Hesmil
ed.
“
Mama!
”
“
Hey
,whatf
ri
endwer
eyouhel
ping?
”
“
Tsaone.
”
“
Qwhatdi dIsayaboutgoi
ngt
opeopl
e’
shouses
wi
thoutpermissi
on.
”
“
Youguy
swer
etaki
ngl
ongt
ocomeback.
”
“St
il
l…Youcouldhavecal
l
edme.Whatifsomethi
ng
hadhappenedwhil
eatTsaone’
shouse?Nextt
ime
don’
tjustgo.
”
“
Ok,
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
“
Wher
eisdaddy
?”
Shesi
ghed.“
Ok…come.
.al
lofy
ou,
let
’ssi
tdown.
ComeThabo.”
Theyal
lsatdown.Kennysi
ghed.
“
Daddywasinvol
vedinacaraccidenti
nthemor ning.
Heisatt
hehospit
al.Thedoct
orisconfi
dentthathe
i
sgoingt
obefine.Wear ej
ustwaiti
ngforhi
mt o
wakeup.
”
Qlookedatherast
ear
sfi
l
ledhi
sey
es.“
Iwantt
osee
hi
m.”
“
Ok.Wewi
l
lgo.
”
Sasal
ookedather
.“I
shegoi
ngt
odi
e?”
“No.Sar
onanooneisdyi
ng.Heisjustunconsci
ous
buthewil
lbef
ine.Hei
sgoingtobef i
ne.Ipromise
youthat
.Nooneshoul
dwor r
y.Daddyisgoingtobe
fi
ne.”
Lethabosmil
ed.“Guy
s,noonesaidheisdead,hei
s
j
ustsleepi
ngbutheisgoi
ngtowakeupandcome
backhome.Q, comeonbuddy!Lookattheki
ds,
wheny
oucr
ytheywi
l
lcr
yok?
”
Henoddedt
ear
ful
l
y.Kennyst
oodup.“
Wewi
l
lgo
l
ater
.”
Shewal
kedt
oherbedr
oom asherphoner
ang.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
…ar
eyoust
il
latt
hehospi
tal
?”
“
Nat
ewhat
everwehadhast
oend.
”
“
Iknowy ouar
efeel
i
nggui
lt
yandIunder
standbutI
l
oveyou.Canwemeetandtal
k?”
“
Youwhat
?Youcan’
tlov
eme!
”
“
Idi
dn’
tchooset
o.”
“Look,
Ilovemyhusband.Ihavealwaysl
ovedhi
m
andwillal
way slovehi
m.Whateverwehadwasall
funwhil
eitlasted.Iwasnev
ergoingt
oleav
emy
husbandforyou.”
“Youthi
nkhei sst
il
lgoingtol
oveyouevenaft
eral
l
thi
s?Hewon’ twantanythi
ngtodowit
hy ouwhenhe
getsuptrustme.Heisnotjustgoi
ngt
of or
giv
eyou
admov eonl i
kenothi
nghappened.
”
“Di
dyousetmeupsot
hatmyhusbandcanf
ind
out
?”
“
What
?”
“
Ronawouldnothav
eknownunl
esssomeonehad
t
oldhi
m.”
“
Whywoul
dIt
ell
him?
”
“
Sot
haty
oucandest
roymymar
ri
age!
”
“Ididn’tdoany t
hingandIam nottheonewho
destroy edy ourmar ri
age,
youdid.Look,
Iknowyou
aret r
yingt ofindsomeonet obl
amebabeandt hat’
s
fi
nebutt rustme, thatmanisnotgoingtowanty
ou
afterthis.
”
“RonaandIar emarri
ed,wehav eourissuesand
trustme,div
orcei
sthelastthingwewi ll
everdo, I
l
ov ehim somuch,youwerenot hi
ngbutdest ruct
ion
tomeandnowIdon’ tneedthatdestr
uction.Iam
goingtofocusonmymar r
iage,st
opcal l
ingme. ”
“
Youarenaï
vei
fyouthi
nkther
eisst
il
lsomet
hing
l
efti
nyourmar
ri
ageKenny
.”
“
Iam notnaï
ve,
IknowmymanandIknowmy
sel
f,
t
hiswil
lbesomet hi
ngwewil
lj
ustworkthr
oughlike
amarri
edcoupleweare.Youwereasi
dething,I
woul
dneverleavemyhusbandforasi
dething.
”
“
Wow!
”
“St
opcall
ingme.Idon’tl
oveyou.Ineverdid,
andI
neverwi
l
l.Itwasj
ustlustandIam overitnow.”
Shehungupandbl
ockedhi
m.

*
**

Out
sidet
hehouse,
Let
habol
ookedatQwi
thshock.
“Youdi
dwhat ?Youhadsex?Ican’
tbeli
eveyouare
havi
ngsex.Iam notev
enhavingsex.JesusChr
ist
!”
Qf
rowned.“
Youhav
enev
erhadsex?
”
“No!BecauseIam notr
eadytobearrest
edf or
defi
lement.Youar
ejust14forcr
yingoutloud!How
doyouev enknowhowt o…Jesushelpyourkids.
”
“
Wear
ebot
hunder
age.
”
“Shemi ghtscr
eam rape.I
fherpar
ent
sfi
ndout
,they
willsayyourapedherandthelawmyboy,t
hel
aw
hatesmen. ”
“
Wel
i
keeachot
her
.Shewoul
dnev
erdot
hat
.”
“Nobutherpar
ent
swil
lmakeherdoi
t.Hol
yfuck!
Didyouacondom?”
“
Shesai
ditwaspai
nful
soIt
ooki
tof
f.
”
“
Yii
miweee!
”Het
ouchedhi
shead.
“
Iam scar
edshemi
ghtgetpr
egnant
.”
“
Might?Shei
sgoi
ngt
ogetpregnant
.Youar
egoi
ng
t
ojai
l.Youar
egoi
ngt
opri
son!Youaregoi
ngtoj
ail
.”
“
Ther
ear
epi
l
lsshecant
ake.
”
“Who’sgoingtogetthem?You?Youar efucki
ng14,
theyarenotgoingtoselltoyou.God!Couldn’
tyou
contr
olyourself
?Andj usthowbigisyourdickfor
youtobehav ingsex.Letmeseei t
.”
Qt ookitout,Let
habosighed.“Takethatbackinyour
pants.Besidespregnancy,t
hereisHIV.Somepeopl e
arebornwi thHIV.Doyouknowt hat
?Doy ouknow
herstatus?Thisiswhyy oushouldn’
tbehav i
ngsex
att
hisage.Iam cal
l
ingsomeonewhocanhelp.Gi
ve
methisgi
rl’
snumber.Iwil
lgi
vehert
hepi
ll
s.”
QgavehimthenumberthenLet
habowal
kedi
nsi
de
andspokebr
ief
lywi
thKennybefor
ewal
ki
ngout.
“Iwi
ll
getthepill
sandgiveher.Hopeful
lyshei
snot
HIVposit
ive.Don’
ttal
ksexorrelat
ionshi
pswit
hher
overt
hephone.Somechi l
dren’sphonesare
monit
ored.”
“
Ok.
”
“
Sharp.Anddon’
twor
ryabouty
ourdad…hewi
l
lbe
f
ine.
”

*
**

Latert
hatday,Kennywal kedoutwit
ht hekidstogo
tothehospit
alasherin-law’
scardrovein.Shet ook
adeepbreathastheyst eppedoutandf r
om theway
hermotherin-
lawwasl ookingather,
shej ustknew
theyhadprobabl
ytoldher .
“
Inev
erl
i
kedy
oubef
orebecauseofy
ourbehav
ior
buttodayyouhav eoutdoneyourself.Tot r
yandki l
l
myson?Whatki ndofawomanar ey ou?It hought
youhadchangedbutIguessy ouar ey ourmot her
’s
daughter
.Kegor eIwonderwhatRonasawi nthis
rapeproduct,
that’
swhyshebehav esl i
kethis.
LegaleIshoul
dn’tbesurpri
sedbecauseIhear dy our
mothersleepswi t
heveryt
hingwhichhasapeni s.
”
Herfat
heri
nlawappr
oached.“
MmagweMaat
la,
I
don’
tthi
nk-
“
“No!Thisrapethi
ngcheat edonmysonandt odayhe
i
sinthehospi t
albecauseofher .Hewaschasing
aft
erherandherboy fr
iend.Youhav enoshame, you
don’
tdeser v
emyson.Youshoul dhavebeent heone
togetinthatacci
dent,youdon’tevendeserv
et ol
ive.
Nowi tmakessense, youlefty
ourkidsthatt
imeand
youwer eprobabl
ysleepingwiththatman.Olebelet
e
l
amosadi !(Youareawh* r
eofawoman. )
”
Qlookedathismotherconf
used.Kennyl
ookedat
t
hem.“ Geti
nsidet
hehouse.”
“Whyshouldt
heygetinsidethehouse?Lett
hem
heart
hatthei
rmothersleepsaroundwit
hdif
fer
ent
manwhi lemarri
edtotheirfat
her.Shemakesup
businesstri
pstogoandcheat .Sheopensherlegs
formenoutt her
eandkissest hem i
npubli
c.She
neverlovedyouoryourfather
.”
“
QIsai
dgeti
nsi
det
hehousenow!
”
Hermot heri
n-l
awangri
lysl
appedhert
henstar
ted
hi
tti
ngherwithherbag.“Mysonisi
nhospi
tal
becauseofyou!”
Thekidswatchedastheirgr
andmotherat
tacked
thei
rmother
.RrgaweRonagr abbedhiswi
feasshe
pull
edKenny’
shairhi
tti
ngherheadwithashoe.
“
Lebel
ete!(
Whor
e!)Iwanty
ouf
arf
rom myson!
”
“
MmagweMaat
la!St
opi
t!Lookatt
heki
ds.
”
Kennybitherl
owerlipf
ixi
nghersel
f.“
Q,geti
nsi
de
thehouse.Iam notgoi
ngtorepeatmysel
f.
”
.
.
Don'
tfor
gett
oli
keandcomment
I
Dir
tyConf
essi
ons
#124

Qslowlywal
kedinsi
det hehousewit
hhissi
bli
ngs.
Kenny’
sfat
herin-
lawlookedathiswi
feandshook
hi
sheaddisappoi
nted.
“
Iam v
erydi
sappoint
edi
nyou.Iknewy
oul
i
kingher
wasj
ustpr
etense.
”
“
RragweMaat
la,
thi
swoman-
“
“Thiswomandi dwhat ?Thiswomani sy ourson’s
wifeandl ongashest il
lhasn’ tsai
dany t
hing,
everyonei sgoingtor especther .Youli
kei toryou
don’t.Idon’tknowwhathappened, y
oudon’ tknow
whathappened.Hercheat ingornoti snoty our
business.That ’
sRona’ sbusi nessandhei snother e
tohandl ehisbusinesssoy ouwi lll
eavethiswoman
alone.Yoursoni snotev ent hatperf
ect.Youdon’t
attackheri nfr
ontoft hekidssot hatherkidscan
hateher .Iam verydisappoi ntedthatyouwoul ddo
that.”
“
She-
“
“Marj
ori
eit’
senough.Isaidnoonei sgoi ngtoat t
ack
herandthatisf
inal
.Daught er
,Iapologizeforwhat
j
usthappened,Iwouldli
ket otal
ktot hekidsand
apol
ogize.Marj
ori
e,gobackt othecar .Staythereti
l
l
Icomeback.Ifyoudon’twantt oli
stent omet hen
fi
ne,t
akeoffthatri
ngoffy ourfi
ngerandgol ookfor
ahusbandy ouwil
lli
stento.Iam donet alki
ngt o
you.
”
Kennysteppedbackfi
ghti
nghertear
sastheyi
tched
hereyes.Hermotheri
n-l
awcli
ckedhert
ongueand
walkedbacktothecar
.
“
Iam r
eal
l
ysor
rydaught
er.
”
At
earr
oll
eddownKenny
’scheekt
henshequi
ckl
y
wi
pedi
toff
.“I
t’
sok.
”
“No,i
t’snotok.Ti
ll
Ronasay ssomet hi
ng,noonehas
anyri
ghtt osayanyt
hing.Iwi
llnothaveit
,Iam
surpr
isedy ourmot
herin-l
awistheonedoi ngthi
s
aft
erwhatshewentt hroughwithmymot her.Letme
i
nchild.”
Kennyopenedt
hedoort
henhewal
kedi
nandl
ooked
att
heki
ds.Ql
ookedathi
smot
her
.
“
Wer
eyoucheat
ing?
”
Hisgrandf
athersatdown.“
Now, whathappened
outsi
deshouldnothavehappened.
”
“
Wasshecheat
ingondad?
”
“No.Yourgr andmot herdon’ tknowwhatshei s
tal
kingaboutbecausey ourfatherhasnotsai d
any t
hing.Ify ourfatherhasnotsai dany thi
ngit
meansshewasn’ t.Peopl ewhodon’ tl i
keyour
mot heraregoi ngt ot aket hi
soppor tunit
ytohat eher
buty ouasherson, y ouar egoingt ohav etostand
withher .Att hi
smoment .Youar etheonl yshehas.I
don’tknowwhatwashappeni ngi ny ourparent’
s
mar ri
age, nobodyknowsexpecty ourmot herand
yourf at
her .Don’tlistent owhatany onewi ll
say,
standbyy ourmot her ,
thatiswher ey ourbl
essings
l
iemyboy .Wi t
hthatwomanwhobr oughty ouinto
thiswor l
d.I fyout urny ourbackonherwhenshehas
noone, whatwi llhappen? ”
“
Ilov
emama.
.Ij
ust
…”
“
Nono,
letgr
ownupi
ssuesbegr
ownupi
ssues.
Whaty ousawoutsi
dewasv erywrongandshould
nothavehappenedbuti
twil
l nev
erhappenagain.I
am sorryt
hatyouhadtowit
nesst hat
.Your
grandmotherwil
lal
soapol
ogize.
”
Thekidsnodded.Thet
ri
plet
slookedatKennywho
smil
ed.“Iam f
ine.
”
“See?Sheisf
ine.Ri
ght
!Wel
l
,Iwi
ll
seeyouall
proper
lyt
omor r
ow.MmagweQ,wewil
ltal
k.”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Youar
ewel
comemydaught
er.
”
Hewalkedoutandgotinhiscar
.Hesi
lent
lystart
ed
t
hecaranddrovetoMaatla’
shousewhereAtsil
e
was.Theywal
kedinsi
dethehouse.
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evey
ouar
edef
endi
ngt
hatl
oosegi
rl
.”
RragweMaatl
alookedathi
swi
fet
henev
ery
onei
n
thehouse.
“
WhosawmmagweQcheat
ing?
”
“
Ronat
oldmeshewascheat
ing.
”
Rr
gaweMaat
lal
ookedathi
sol
derson.“
Ok.Rona
tol
dyou.Fi
ne.Di
dMmagweQcauseRona’
s
acci
dent
?”
Maat
last
oodup.“
Hewaschasi
ngher
.”
“So?Di
dshecausehisacci
dent
?AsfarasIknow,
I
hearhewant
edtocrossaredtr
aff
icl
i
ght.
”
“Kennybroughtherboyf
ri
endt
othehospi
tal
and
kissedhi
mt here.Isawi
t.
”
“
Arey
ouKenny
’shusband?
”
“
Ronai
smybr
otherandshe-
“
“
Iaskedi
fyouwer
eKenny
’shusband.
”
“
Nobut
-“
“Thenshutup.St ayoutofyourbr other’
smar ri
age
i
ssues.Ifhewant edy ouhandli
nghi sissueshe
wouldhav esaidsobuthedi dn’tsayany thing.You
fail
edyourownmar ri
age,youar ethelastper sont o
standbef orebehav i
nglikeJesus’scousin.Noone
herewillsayany thi
ngt oKeneil
wenorwi l
l any one
turnherkidsagai nsther.AsfarasIknow, shei smy
daughterin-lawandt i
llRonadivorcesher ,ev eryone
willr
especther .Youar enotgoingt omeddl einhis
i
ssuest i
l
l hegivesy outherightto.Iam donet al
ki
ng
aboutt hi
s.”Hel ookedathi swife.“ Iam donet alki
ng
aboutt hi
s, nooneandImeannoonewi l
l talkabout
i
tany mor e.WenaAt si
leIgotacal lfrom Apr il
’s
fatherandIhear dy ougav eherdi seasesy ety ouare
thesameper sonwhowi l
lstandandpoi ntf i
nger s.I
am v erydisappointedinyou.Fort hi sone,”He
pointedatMaat la.“Iam notsur prised.Hei sal ost
causebutasf ory ou…”Heshookhi shead.“ Iam
greatlydisappointed.”

*
**

Kennydr
ovet
othehospi
tal
sil
ent
ly,
Qlookedather
.
“
Iam sor
rygr
annyat
tackedy
ou.
”
Kennyl
ookedathi
m.“
It
’sok.Notev
ery
onewi
l
lli
ke
me.”
“
IknowandIam sor
ry.
”
Kennysmil
edtear
ful
ly.“
Ilov
eyou,Ilov
ey our
si
bli
ngsandyourfat
her.
”Shelookedaheadastear
s
fi
ll
edherey es.“Somet i
mesIam nott hebestperson
outthere,
somet imesImakebaddeci sions,
somet i
mesImakemi stakesbutitdoesn’tmeanI
l
ovey ouory oursibl
i
ngsory ourf
atheranyless.My
famil
yismyl ifebutIam notper f
ectok? ”
Ql
ookedathi
smot
her
.“Iknow.Il
ovey
oust
il
l.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oomama.
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Ilov
eyout
ooLar
ry.
”
“
Met
oomama!
”
“
Ilov
eyout
ooWawa.
”
“
Met
hree!
”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Ilov
eyout
ooSasa.
”
Kennypar kedatthehospi
talandst
eppedoutwith
theirki
ds.Awhi l
elat
ersheledthem i
nsi
dethei
r
father’
sroom wherehewasconnectedtomachines.
Kennyswal lowed.
“Uh.
..Iheardsomet
imespeopl
eincomacanhearus
solet’
stalktohi
m.”
Qsl owl
ywalkedoverandhel
dhishand.Tearsfi
ll
ed
hiseyesashelookedathi
sfatherthenonetear
rol
leddown.Hequickl
ywipeditoffbefor
eanyone
couldsee.
Althekidsgatheredaroundhim asKennystood
againstthedoorwatchingtr
yingtoholdher
self
.Her
phoner angthenshetookitoutandstaredat
Tshenolo’scall
.Shewalkedoutleavi
ngthekids
al
one.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Iam stil
langr ybecauseIt oldyouKenei lwe!Ij ust
wantt opunchy ourfacebecauseIt oldyoubutof
causet hi
si sy ouandy oudon’ tl
isten.Younev er
l
istent oany one.Itoldyout owalkawayi fyoudi dn’
t
wantt owor kt hi
ngst hr
oughandy out hought
teachinghim al essonwast hebestdeci sionto
makebutl ookaty ourselftoday.Youar ecr y
ing.Why
arey oucrying?Why ?Wher eyougoi ngtost opi fhe
didn’tgeti
nanacci dent?Idoubt .Youwer ejust
goingt ocont i
nuecheat i
ng.That ’
swhatanger sme
themost .Youcan’ thandl etheresultsofy our
actionsandwantpeopl et opityyouandsayoh
Kenny…y oudon’tdeser v
ethi
s.Youdidn’tev
enhave
concr
et eevi
dencet hathewascheat i
ng.Youwere
j
ustconv i
ncedhewas.Yourpr obl
em isyouwantto
bethemani nther elat
ionshi
pandcompet ewithhi
m,
well
,therei
tgoes.Seemsy ouwont hi
sround!”
“Iknow…Iknow…Iwaswr ong.Iam notgoingto
denythat
.Imessedup, Ir
eall
ydid.IjustwishIknew
howt omakeallt
hisok.Iam justscaredthathemay
dieall
becauseofme.”
Tshenol
osi
ghed.“
Don’
tthi
nkl
i
ket
hat
.”
“
Iwi
l
lnev
erf
orgi
vemy
sel
fifhedoesn’
tmakei
t.
”
“
Hewi
l
lmakei
t.
”
“
Iwouldhav
erobbedmyki
dst
hel
ovef
rom t
hei
r
f
ather
.”
“
Not
hingi
sgoi
ngt
ohappent
oRona.Beposi
ti
ve.
”
“
Hisf
amilyhat
eme.Iknowhedoest
oo.Hei
sgoi
ng
t
odiv
orceme.”
“
Welll
etthem hat
e.It
’sfine.Lethi
m di
vor
ceyou,i
t’
s
f
ine…youwil
lpickyourselfup,l
ear
nalessonand
moveon.”
“Il
ovehi
m.Ireal
l
ydo.Noonebel
i
evesmewhenI
sayIl
ovethi
smanbutIdo.
”
“
Iknow.Butyoumessedup.Bi
gti
me.Bepr epar
ed
f
ortheworst
.Hopef
ull
ytheki
dsunder
stand.”
“
Qisgoi
ngt
ohat
eme.
”
“
Hewil
lcomearound.Peopl
eMakemist
akes.You
madey
ours,
youwilll
earnfr
om i
tandmoveon.”
“
Yeah…”
“
Wher
eisEsi
?”
“
Uhar
ound.
”
“
Ok,
keepmeupdat
ed.
”
“
Ok.
”
“Ilov
ey oujustthaty ouareannoy i
ngsomet i
mesbut
IloveyouandIwi ll
standwi thyouont his.Kegore
helayoudon’ tl
istenKenny .Ifyoul
istenedmor e
may bethingswi l
lbedi f
ferentbuti
t’sfi
ne.Noneed
tocryov erabrokengl ass.By e.
”
“
Bye.
”
Kennywal
kedbacki
nsi
deandwat
chedasherki
ds
spoket
othei
rfat
her
.

*
**

MiaopenedherdoorholdingherSi
mbachi
psand
l
ookedatherboyfr
iendstandi
ngtheot
hersi
deof
t
heburglarbar
.
“
Hi.
.”
Shesi
ghed.“
Hi.
”
“
Iam sor
ryf
orwhathappenedbutIdon’
tthi
nkIst
il
l
wantt
ogetmarr
ied.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Justok?Di
dyouev
enl
oveme?
”
“
YesbutIal
sodon’
tthi
nkIcanmar
ryamanwho
want
edtostabme.
”
“
Iwasn’tevengoi
ngt
odoany
thi
ngt
oyoubecauseI
l
oveyou.”
“
Youst
rangl
edme.
”
“
Didy
oul
oveme?
”
“
Idi
d,Ido.
”
“
Whatwasn’
tIgi
vi
ngy
ou?
”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“Al
ltheseyear
sIt
houghtwewer
ebui
l
ding
something.
”
“Iam sorr
y.Il
oveyou,
Iwouldli
eforust
ofixt
hings
butifyouhavemadeupy ourmindi
t’
sok.
”Shetook
offt
her i
ngandtri
edgivi
ngitt
ohim.
“
Youcankeepi
t.Iam goingtofi
ndsomeonewho
wil
ll
ovemeasmuchasIl ov
ethem andIwantt
hat
r
ingtobey
ourr
emi nderofwhatwecouldhavehad.
”
Shewatchedhi
m wal
kawayt
hensi
ghed.“
Itest
ed
forSTD,y
oushoul
dtoo.
”
“
Wow!
”
Hegotinhiscaranddr
oveof
f.Mial
ookedatt
he
sambachipsastheyl
ostt
ast
ethengotbacki
nsi
de
thehouse.
*
**

MmagweSadiwalkedinSadi
’sroom l
ooki
ngforher
shoeandf
rownedstar
ingatherdaught
ersl
eepi
ng.
“
Sadi
…”
“
Ma?
”
“
Arey
ouok?
”
“
Ehh…”
“
Isi
ttheper
iodpai
ns?
”
“
Yes.
”
“Ok,l
etmegety
oupai
nki
l
ler
s.Hav
eyouseenmy
shoe?”
“
Uhhcheckundert
hebed.
”
Hermotherknel
tthenl
ookedunderthebed.She
pausedst
ari
ngatthecondom wrappercornert
hen
shetooki
tandhelditi
nherhandwithafrown.
“
Sadi
…what
’st
his?
”
Sadi
rai
sedherheadandl
ookedathermot
her
hol
dingthepi
eceoft
hecondom wr
apper
,herhear
t
poundi
ng.
“
Ma?
”
“
Whati
sthi
s?”
Sadiopenedhermout
htosaysomet
hingbut
nothi
ngcameout.
“Youknowwhat?Youhav ebeenwalki
ngfunni
lyever
sinceIcameback.Sadi
,youknowyoucantalkto
memybaby …isthereanyonewhodidsomethingto
you?”
Sheshookherhead.
“Thenwhyhav
eyoubeenwalki
ngl
i
ket
her
eis
somethi
ngbet
weenyourl
egs?”
“
Ihur
tmy
sel
f.
”
“
Ok.Takeofy
ourpant
ies.Letmesee.
”
.
.
Fami
l
yli
keandcommentonouri
nser
ts
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#125

Sadi
lookedathermot
her
.
“
Ifellear
li
eronbecauseIwasplay
ingwit
hwater
i
nsidethehouse,It
ookthecondom andputwat
er
i
nside.”
Hermotherfr
owned.“
Sadiwee,
didn’
tyouoncel
ose
of
fyourteet
hbecauseofdoi
ngthat?
”
“
Sor
ry.
”
“Ngng,y
oushoul
dstopacti
ngli
keachil
d.May
be
nextt
imeweshoul
dnotleavey
oualone.
”
“
Iwasj
ustbor
ed.
”
“
Toanextentwherey
oupl
aywi
thcondoms?Idon’
t
l
i
kethatbehav
ior
.”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
Hermot herreachedforhershoethenwal
kedout
angri
ly
.Sadi cl
osedherey esput
ti
ngherhandonher
chestwhileherheartpoundedsomuch.Minut
es
l
aterhermot
herwal
kedi
nwi
thpai
nki
l
ler
s.
“
Take.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“Iam r
eall
ydisappoi
ntedinyou.It
houghtyouwere
nowsensibleenoughtobehav epr
operl
yyetyoust
il
l
playwit
hcondomsaty ourage.
”
Shegotthegl
assofwat ert
hendrankthepainki
l
ler
s
whil
ehermotherwentonshouting.Shefi
nal
ly
walkedout
,Sadigotundercov
erswi t
hherphone
andtext
edQonwhat sapp.
Sasi
:Mamaf
oundt
hepi
eceoft
hecondom wr
apper
.
Q: Shi
t!Whatdi
dyousay
?”
Sadi
:Imadeupsomest
ory .
Q:
Iam l
i
ter
all
yshaki
ng.Di
dyoudr
inkt
hepi
l
l?”
Sadi
:Yes.
Q:Dammit!Nextt
imewest i
ckwi
tht
hecondom.
I
maginegoingtoj
ail
,Iam onl
y14 Ihopey ouar
e
del
eti
ngthi
smessages
Sadi
:Iam.Ir
eal
l
yli
kedt
hesex I
twasni
ce.
Q:
Itwas.Iwantt
odoi
tagai
n.
Sadi
:Mamaisangry,
Idon’
tthi
nkshewi
l
lev
erl
eav
e
mealonei
nthehouse.
Q:
Youcanal
way
ssneakt
hissi
de.
Sadi
: Yourmom l
ooksscar
y.
Q:Sheisactual
lycool butwewi
l
lmakeapl
an.
Don’
tforgettodel
etet
hischat
Sadi
:Ok.Ij
ustdr
anksomepai
nki
l
ler
s.Hopef
ull
ythe
pai
nwill
begonetomorr
ow.
Q:
Ok,
Iwi
l
lcal
lyoui
nthemor
ning.
Sadi
:Shar
p.
Q:
Del
etet
hischat
.
Sadi
del
etedi
tal
l
.
Sadi
: Done!
Sheclosedherey
esputt
ingherphonedownt
hen
foundhersel
fsmi
li
ngyetagai
n.
*
**

Latert
hateveni
ng,EsiknockedonMaat
la’
sdoor
.He
openedthedoorandlookedather.
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”
“Ididn’ttouchyourbr other’sdi ck.It houghtIwoul d
l
eti tgobutIam r eallyhur tthaty ouofal lpeople
woul dthinkIwoul dmi sbehav ewi thy ourbrother
whenIseehi m asabr other .Iam nother etot r
yand
pleadmycasewi thy oubecauser eal lywhetheryou
believemeornot ,itdoesn’ treallymat ter
.Iam just
disappointedbecausebesi desbei ngt hemot herof
yourchi l
dren,besidesbei ngy ourex, Iam yourfri
end.
YouandIwer efr
iendsbef or eany thingelseand
todaywear efri
ends.Youhav eknownmef oryears
Maat la.Iam real
lyhear tbr oken, ifev eryouhav e
brokenmyhear t…t odayt ookt het rophey.”She
forcedasmi l
ewi pingawayhert ear s.
“
That
’sal
lIwant
edt
osay
.By
e.”
Shetur
nedt
ohercarandgotin.Maatl
astoodther
e
foramomentt
henwalkedbackinsi
dehishouseand
t
ookhi
sphone.Hedi
aledWazha.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
HiWazha,
it’
sMaat
la.
”
“
Ohhel
l
o,i
sev
ery
thi
ngok?
”
“Uh…notexactl
y.Ij
ustwant
edt
oaskwhatreal
ly
happenedthedayyousawEsit
ouchi
ngRona’
s
dick.
”
“Whot oldy outhat
?Wasi tMi a?”Shechuckled.“
Son,
ti
llt
odayIr eall
ydon’ tknowwhatr eal
l
yhappened.I
wasl ookingfrom insidethehousest andingbythe
windowsoIcan’ tsayf orsure.WhatIt hi
nkIsaw
mightnothav ebeenr eal,y
ouknowIal sohavea
probl
em wi thmyey esightthat’
swhyIkeptqui et
aboutthei ssuebecauseIr eal
lydidn’
tseeproperl
y.
”
“
Oh…”
“Yes.Don’
tli
stent
oMi a,
youknowhowshei
s.How
areyouandthekids?
”
“
Wear
egood.
”
“
That
’sgood.Letmegetmysl
eep.
”
“
Okby
e.”
“
Bye.
”
Hehungupstaredathi
sTVthought
ful
l
y.Het
ookhi
s
phoneandwalkedt
oThabo’
sroom.
“
Thabo!
”
“
Papa.
.”
“
Iam goi
ngt
oseey
ourmot
her
.Comeandl
ock.
”
“
Ok.
”
Maatlawalkedouttohiscarthendrov
eof f
.Hegota
cream doughnutf
rom afi
ll
ingstat
ionthendrov
eto
herhouse.Heknockedonherdoor .Moesiopened
minuteslat
erinanightdr
ess.
“
Whatdoy
ouwant
?”
“
Ok,
Iov
err
eact
ed.Iam sor
ry.
”
Moesismi
ledst
ari
ngatthecr
eam doughnutthen
t
ookit
.“I
t’
sok.I
t’
snotl
ikeyouowemeany t
hing.
”
Maatl
alookedi
nhereyesthenpull
edhercl
oserand
ki
ssedher.Heki
ssedherhard,
ithadbeenyear
s
si
ncehelastki
ssedher
.Hepushedherinsi
dethe
houseandpickedherup,thei
rbreat
hsragged.
Moesiputdoughnutdownandt ouchedhisbiceps
ki
ssinghi
m backashet ookhertohisbedroom
whereheplacedherdown.
Maatlat
ookoffhernightdr
essandlookedather
bar
ebody .Hepushedheronthebedtakingof
fhis
cl
othesandgotontopofhergetti
ngbetweenher
l
egs….

*
**

Atsil
elaidont hecouchst ar
ingintothedarkness.He
si
ghed, hewasbei ngser v
edsilenttr
eatment .He
didn’
tev enknowwhatt odo.Shewasn’ teven
cookingf orhi
m.Hi sstomachgr owled.Heshi ver
ed
withnobl anketthentookhisphonet opasst ime.He
pausedst ari
ngatMi a’
snewpr ofi
l
epi ct
urethenhe
call
edher .
“
Rrawee,
stopcal
l
ingme.
”
“
Whyar
eyout
hisev
il
?”
“
Meev
il
?Mxm.
”
“
Wher
edi
dyougett
heSTI
?”
“
Myboy
fri
end.
”
“
Omaaka.(
Youar
ely
ing.
)Youhav
esev
eral
men.
”
“
Whosai
dIam sl
eepi
ngwi
tht
hem?
”
“
Stopl
yi
ng.
”
“Iam onl
ysleepi
ngwit
hy ouandmyboy f
ri
end.
Betweeny outwowastheonewi t
hthedi
seasebut
youdon’tseemepoint
ingfinger
s.Nowit
’sover
betweenyouandIandhim andIsoIam freetodo
whatIwant .
”
“
Youbr
okeupwi
thhi
m?”
“Hebr
okeupwi thme.Iam real
l
yhur
tbuti
t’sl
ife.
Rrawee,pl
easeleav
emeal oneandgotoyourwife
whom youlovesomuch.Akerennayouwerejust
usi
ngme.By e.
”
“
Wai
t…”
“
Atsi
l
ewhati
sit
?”
“
Ist
il
lhav
eyourphone.
”
“
Youcankeepi
tanddowhat
every
ouwantt
odo.
”
“
Ilongswi
tchedi
tof
f.Comeandpi
cki
tup.
”
“
Igotanewone.
”
“Tl
hammawenat l
aot
sef
ounu.(
Pler
asecomeand
getyourphone.
)”
“
Soy
oucanki
l
lme?
”
“
Iwon’
tdoany t
hingt
oyou.Pl
easebr
ingmesome
f
oodnyana.Andasmallbl
anket
.”
Miastar
tedl
aughi
ng.“
Don’
ttel
lmeshei
sthat
angr
y!”
“
Aker
eyoudeci
dedt
ogi
vemedi
seases.
”
“
Ij
o!”
“
Sor
ry,
please…”
“
WhatdoIget
?”
“
Any
thi
ng.
”
“
Ok.Iam comi
ng.
”
“
Thanks.
”
Hehungupandsi
ghed.Awhi
l
elat
ershet
ext
edhi
m.
Hewalkedoutandwentacr
ossther
oadwhereshe
wasparked.Hej
umpedinandgavehert
hephone.
Shesmiled.
“
Thanks.Take.
.”
Shehandedhim apl
ateofwarmfoodt
henhe
i
mmedi at
elyst
art
edeati
ng.Whenhewasdoneshe
handedhi
m abottl
eofwater
.
“
Thanks.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
Hedrankthewater.Atthebackseat
,Mi
ahanded
hi
m ablanket
.“There.
”
“
Thanky
ou.KekopaP500.(
CanIhav
eP500.
)”
Sheputherhandsonherf
acel
aughi
ng.“
Shet
ook
yourmoney?”
“
Mycar
ds.
”
“Awwshame.Damn, bei
ngawi
fei
sthi
snice?You
canjusttakehi
scar
dsandl
eav
ehimlooki
ngli
kea
beggar?”
“
Youcanewal
l
eti
t.
”
Mi
asi
ghedt
henputonherseat
bel
t.
“
Bye…”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
eve-
“
“
Ngng,watchhowy
out
alkt
ome.Aker
eyouwant
t
heP500.
”
“
Mxm.
”
Shesmi l
ed.“Gobefor
eshewakesupandf i
ndst
hat
youhavedecidedtosneak.Thi
sti
mearoundyouwi
ll
sleepoutsi
de.”
Hest
eppedoutt
henshedr
oveawaypi
cki
ngacal
l
.

*
**

Thefoll
owi
ngmor ningKennyopenedthegate
walki
ngout
sideinhertrai
ningcost
umet hen
fr
ownedasNat esteppedoutofhiscar
.Helookedat
herasshewalkedov er
.
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”
“
Soy
oubl
ockedme?
”
Kennytookadeepbreat
h.“Natecanyoust
opthi
s?
Youjustcan’
tbecominghere.Thi
sismymari
tal
home.”
“
Ijustwantust
otal
k.”
“
Idon’twantt
otalk.Iam t
ryi
ngtobecivi
l.What
ever
wehadhascomet oanend.Itwasall
goodwhil
eit
l
astedbutnowit
’sov er
.Iwantnot
hingtodowit
h
you.Il
ovemyhusband.”
“
Doy
ou?
”
“Ido!Ilovehim andIwantt of i
xt hi
ngswi t
hhi m.
Mar r
iedpeoplegot hr
oughal ot,myhusbandandI
too.It’
snotevenaboutusget ti
ngcaught ,eveni fhe
didn’
tcatchus, Iwassti
llgoingt oendi tbecauseat
theendoft heday ,
thatmani st heloveofmyl i
fe.
Yes,hemi ghtdivor
ceme. .fi
nebutt hatwon’tmeanI
am goingt ocomet oyou.Wi thy ouitwasonl ylust,
it
wasj ustsex.That’
sall
.”
Hesmil
ed.“
Whoar
eyout
ryi
ngt
oconv
ince,
youor
me?”
“Iam nottr
yingtoconvi
nceany one.Noonewill
ev er
comet othelevelofmyhusband.Noty ouoranyone
elseoutther
e.Youcannev ercompar etohi
m.”
“
Ok,
sot
hisi
swhatwear
edoi
ngnow?
”
“Wearenotdoi ngany thi
ng,j
uststati
ngthefacts.
Stopblowingyourownhor n,
Ronai snotthetypeof
many ouwoul dev ercompetewithbecausehei si
n
hi
sownl evel.Stopcomi ngtohishouse,Iam not
goingtoletyoudisrespectmyhusbandt othatlevel
.
Leavemyhouse. ”
Natel
ookedathert
hengoti nhi
scaranddroveoff
.
Kennywal
kedbackinsideherhouse,
all
theener
gy
shehadwokenupwi t
hdr ai
ned.

WEEKSLATER…
.
.
Don'
tfor
gett
oli
keandcommentf
ami
l
y y
our
commentsar
emotiv
ati
on.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#126

Weeksl
ater
..
.

Kennyparkedhertwodoorbl ackFor
dMust angat
Motsamai RealEst
atethentookouthercompact
mirr
orandf i
xedhersel
f.Shepickedherr
ingi
ng
phonerubbingherli
pstogether.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Kenny
!”
“
Tshenol
ocal
m down.
”
“
Hei
sgoi
ngt
oki
l
lyou.
”
“
Heela,
hei
sgoingt
odivor
ceme,
atl
eastl
etme
wal
koutwi
thsomethi
ng.
”
“
Aft
erbuy
ingyour
sel
facarwort
hloadsofhi
s
money
?Ot i
l
egogony edi
samosi
mane.”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Atl
eastl
etmecr
yinmynewbabya
nkubi
lemont l
ungar
ekelebel
ete.(
aft
erheki
cksme
outofthehousesay
ingIam awhore.
)”
Tshenol
olaughed.“
Iadmi
rey
ourgut
s.”
“Iam soscared.Ihavebeenthi
nki
ng,heisprobabl
y
goingtoslapmeebi l
ekanaRonahacl apa,
wago
bolaya.)
WhenRonasl aps,heki
ll
s.)
”
“
Iam scar
edf
ory
ouf
ri
end.
”
“Ei
sh…whatishekil
lsme?Mmeatl eastIwoul
d
havedr
ivenaniceexpensi
vecar
.”
Tshenol
olaughedhar
der
.“I
t’
snott
hesame.
”
“Iam get
ti
nginameet i
ngatMot samai Real
Etsate.I
am goingtobeget
tingthelooksfrom hi
sbrother
.
KanaIam thevi
ll
ainthesedays.”
“
Mxm,
mang?Di
dn’
tMaat
lacheatonhi
swi
fe?
”
“Waii
,kanaIam occasional
l
ybeingcalledarape
product
.Iam beingcall
edawhor e,
slutever
ythi
ng.I
f
wordscouldkil
lIwouldbedead.EbileIfeel
li
ke
wakandaatthisstage.Ihav
ethi
ckski n.”
“
Kant
ewenaor
il
eng?
”
Theybothlaughed.“Ronaokileampont sadi
lo.
(Ronaonceshowedmet hi
ngs.
)Mmagot weIam
i
ntimidat
ed.Wai t
sewakandabat hong,
Iam sti
ll
waiti
ngtobet aughtalesson.
”
“
Ngng,
youar
egoi
ngt
ohel
l
.”
“Ronaalmostki l
ledmef orthatwoman.Ir eall
y
thoughtwhenhewal ksoutofj ailIwouldbeol d
news, Iwasr eadyt oacceptdef eatkebona
mosimaneal atl
helakeymot oi
letinggotwe( Isee
thi
sboyt hrowi ngthekeyi nt het oil
etsayi
ng)You
rai
sey ourvoiceory oui nsultmeIam goi ngtof uck
yourmout hsohar dy ouwon’ tbeabl etospeak
weeksandIam notj okingwi thy ou.”Kennylaughed.
“Everbeent hreatenedbutgett urnedonatt hesame
ti
me?Fr om t herekeut wadi ckot sena(From thereI
fel
tthedicksl idin)…heeei i
.”
Tshenol
olaughed.“
Yout
woar
ecr
azy
.”
“Doyouknowhowdi f
ficulti
tist
okeepquietwhil
e
bei
ngfuckedhardandgood?Andwhenhewasdone
hewaslikel
ookatme…i fyougi
vehi
m mypussy ,I
am goi
ngtokil
lbothofyou.”Shebl
ushed.“Bat
hong
Il
oveRona.
.”
“
Hei
sdi
vor
cingy
ou.
”
“Iam goi
ngtor ef
use.Whoam Isupposedt
odateif
nothim?NnaIl ovemymanandImessedup.Iam
readytotakeanypunishmentmmehelaIam not
goinganywhere.Iwouldrat
herdi
e.”
“Ehh,hewi
llj
ustki
lly
ouaker
eotswagopaki
sakuku
yagagwe.(
isn’
tity
ouhavebeengi
vi
ngpeopl
ehi
s
pussy.)
”
“Iwanthi
mt odowhat
everhewantswithmmebutI
am notgoi
nganywher
e.Iam r
eadyforany
thi
ngebi
l
e
Iam goi
ngtodenysl
eepi
ngwithNate.
”
“
Kennywee,
youwantt
obebeat
enaker
e?”
“Heela,
Iam goingtodenyi
t.Hedidn’tseeme, Iam
nevergoingtotel
lhi
m Ihadsexwi t
hNat e.Kanake
hammagweTumoar eKenny,sometimesdeny i
ngis
thebestthingt
hatcaneverhappentoy ou.Iam
goingtodenyit
.Aslongashedi dn’
tsee, Iam going
todenyit.”
“
Obat
agoswaaker
e?(
Youwantt
odi
eri
ght
?)”
“Iwoul dr atherdiet hanadmi tt ocheat i
ng.Iam not
l
osi ngmyhusbandt oaoneni ghtst and.Keagana.
Hewi lljustki l
lme, therei snot hi ngt hatIcando.
EbileIam goi ngt ocrysomucht illhebel ievesme.
Ronahasal way sdeni edcheat ing, ev enify oucatch
himi nacompr omi singposi ti
onl ewenahel aogona
gobonagor e(andy ouy our selfcanseet hat)hewas
cheat ing, hewi lldenyi t
.Ibetev eni fy oucat chhim
withhi sdi ckdippedi napussy , hewi lldenyit.That
mancanl ie.Iknowf orsur ethatwaswi thawoman
att hel odgekoKasane, Idon’ thav econcr ete
evidencebutIknowmyman.Whoev erthiswoman
was, hehadbeensl eepingwi t hherf oraf ewweeks
butt het hi ngwi t
hRonai st hathewi l
l denyandhi de
i
tt haty ouar eleftquest i
oni ngy our self.Thereisno
onewhoknowsmymanbet t
ert hanmeTshenol o
andwhenIsayhewascheat ing, believemehewas.
Idon’ tknowwhatwaswr ongbuthewas.That
doesn’ tj ustifymecheat ingonhi m butwear ebot h
wr ongmmehel aIam nev ergoi ngt oadmi tt
o
sleepingwi thNat e.
.”
Tshenol
ochuckl
ed.“
Igi
veup.
”
“Heel
aletmegeti
nbefor
ethosebr
other
ski
ll
me.
Kanatheyar
ewait
ingf
orRonatowakeupandki
ck
meoutorkil
lme.”
Tshenol
olaughed.“
Bye!
”
Shesteppedoutinherbl
acksuitandwalkedinsi
de
thebui
lding.Shesmi
ledpassi
ngtherecepti
onthen
gotintheelevat
orpi
cki
ngWazha’acall
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Kenny,
yourmot heri
n-l
awisher
e.Shesai
dshe
want
shergrandkidst
hings.
”
“
Godhel
pme!Whatdoest
hiswomanwantf
rom
me!
”
“Shesay
sshewant shergr
andki
dst
ost
aywi
thher
atMaatl
a’shouse.
”
“
Don’tgi
vehermychil
dren’
sthi
ngs.Iam t
ryi
ngt
o
t
oler
ateherbutshei
sclosetoannoyi
ngme.”
“
Whatshoul
dIt
ell
her
?”
“
Tel
lhert
otal
ktome.
”
“
Ok.
”
WazhahungupasKennywal kedinsi
dethe
boar
droom wher
eothersharehol
derswher
e.She
smil
edstar
ingatAt
sil
esitt
ingwhereRonaalway
s
satt
henshesatdown.
“
Right
,ev
ery
onei
sher
e,wecanst
art
.”
KennylookedatMaatl
awhowasst
ari
ngatherthen
si
ghed.Themeetingwentonf
orawhi
let
hentil
l
Atsi
l
efinall
ycl
oseditof
f.
“
Thanky
oual
lforcomi
ng.
”
Theshar
ehol
der
sstoodupandwal kedoutchat
ting
amongstt
hemsel
ves.KennygotupasMaat l
aglared
ather
.
“Thesepeoplev
aluethei
rti
meKenei
l
we.Theydi
dn’
t
comeher etowaitf
oryou.”
Kennysi
ghed.“
Ofcause.Iapol
ogi
zef
orbei
ngl
ate.
”
At
sil
esi
ghed.“
It
’sok.
”
Kennygrabbedherhandbagandwal
kedt
othedoor
.
“Kenny
,canwet al
kinmyof f
ice?
”
Shel
ookedatAt
sil
e.“
Ofcause.
”
Theywal
kedt
ohisoff
iceandsatdown.At
sil
e
si
ghed.“
Howareyouholdi
ngup?”
Shefrownedsur
prisedconsi
der
inghehadn’
tbeen
speakingt
oherforweeksnow.
“Noneedt
oforcey
our
sel
ftot
alkt
omeAt
sil
e.I
knowyouhat
eme.”
“
No.Idon’thateyou.Ij
ust…Iam hur tonbehal
fof
mybrotherbecauseIknowj usthowmuchhel oves
youandatthesamet imeIknowsomet imes
mist
akeshappen.Iam notint heplacetoj
udgeyou
whenIhavemyownf airshareoffuckups.”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Iam f
ine.Thanky
ou.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shestoodupstar
ingathi
swr
inkl
edshi
rt
.Hesmi
l
ed.
“Justl
eavei
t.
”
Kennyl
aughedandwal
kedout.Shepausedst
ari
ng
atMaat
la’
scarwit
hEsiseat
edinsi
de.

*
**
Esisati
nMaat la’scartypingsomethingonher
phonechatti
ngwi thaf r
iend.Sheraisedherheadto
seeifMaatlawascomi ngy ett
hensighedst ar
ingas
Kennywalkingov erputti
ngonhersungl asses.She
knockedont hewi ndow.Esi r
oll
editdownt hen
Kennysmiledst ari
ngather .
“
Hi…”
Esi
sighed.“
Kenei
l
we.
”
“Kegoreyoutouchmyhusband’
sdi
ckandnev
ersay
anyt
hingaboutit
.”
“Ihavenev
ertouchedRona’
sdickbutgoaheadand
accuseme,akerethat
’swhaty
ouaregoodat.”
“Ithoughtwewer emor ethanjustf
riends.Ithought
wewer esisters.I
t’
sfunnyhowy earsoff r
iendshi
p
canj ustcomet oanendbutIam gladi thas
happenedt hatIknowy ourtr
uecolors.NnaEsi you
cannev erfool me.Iam notMaat l
a.Iam hur tand
disappointedt hatoutofal
lpeople,y
ouwoul ddo
this.
”
“Keneil
weIdon’ thavetimef ort hi
s.Themai nreason
Iam notspeakingt oyoui sbecausey ourbehavior
sti
nks.Idon’tknowwhoy out hi
nky ouaremmey ou
havechanged.Idon’ tevenr ecognizet hi
sfake
persony ouare.Youar enott heKennyIonceknew.I
tri
edtost andbyy outhroughal lyourbaddecisions
butIhav ehadenough.Iwi l
lnotkeeppeopl ewho
don’tgrowupar oundmeandkeept ryingtomot her
you.May beithast odowi thy ourmotherbutIcan’ t
anymor e.”
“
Mymot
her
?Wow!
”
“Youarei
mmat ur
e.Youarethetruedefini
ti
onof
beautywi
thnobrainsandyouwillnev
erbuilda
homewi t
hthatki
ndofbehavior
.Ifeelsorr
yforyour
kidsand-
“
“
Don’
tfeel
sor
ryf
ormyki
ds.
”
“WellIdobecauseassoonasRonawakeup, they
aregoingtoknowwhatyouar e.Kanaheisgoingto
divor
ceyou.Ronawouldneverstayfort
hat
nonsense.Iam sti
l
lsur
pri
sedy ouaresti
l
l hangi
ng
aroundclosewhenyoushouldbewi t
hyour
boy
fri
end.
”
“Youaresoconfi
dentthatmyhusbandwi l
ll
eaveme
butsweethear
tyouarewr ong.Youdon’
tknow
anyt
hingaboutmymar ri
age.Whatmakesy outhi
nk
myhusbandwi l
ll
eaveme? ”
“Becauseheknowshiswor
thandhewillnotst
ayfor
acheatingwomanwhoembar r
asseshi
m and
humili
ateshi
minpubli
c.Al
lyouhavei
saf aceanda
bodybutnobrains.
”
“
Saysthewomanwhoi
sbacktoget
herwit
haman
whohadanent
ir
efami
l
youtsi
demarri
age.
”
“
Heel
alet
-“
“Don’
traisey ourv oicehun,savethatenergyandgo
l
osethatwei ghtatt hegym.It’
snotcut eanymor e.
Youleftagoodmant oonlycomebackt othet rash
youhadt hrowni nt hebinandy outalkaboutbei ng
smart.Eketepel eMoesi .Youar eatruedefini
tionof
dumbbutgoaheadandsayIonl yhav ethefaceand
thebody,thisfaceandbodyownsbusi nessyety ou
aresti
llworkingf orsomeoneandy oudon’ teven
haveany t
hingt oy ournameexpecty ourcarand
whaty oucameoutwi thiny ourdi vorcesett
lement.
AndIam v erydisappointedt haty ouwoul dtouch
Rona’sdick.Whatmakesy out hinky ouarehistype?
Noof f
ensebutt heonl yti
mehewoul deverlookat
youli
kewoul dbewhenhe’ sdr unkbecausesoberI
doubthewoul dgiveyouasecondl ook.Reasonwhy
Maatlahadt ocheatony ouwi thaf arbetterlooki
ng
bei
ng.”Kennyl ookedatherneckf olds.“Outhere
l
ookinglikeaf atsnake,hissy ourwayt othegy m my
l
ove,wal apisakwa.By e!
”
Kennytur
nedandwal kedt
ohercarthenMoesitook
adeepbreat
handlookedatherphonethenlooked
atthedat
eandclosedhereyeswonderi
ngwhyher
per
iodhadn’
tcomey etorwasitmenopause?

*
**

Miablewhergum seat
edinheroff
icegoingthrough
somer epor
tst
henherphonevi
brated.Shereached
fori
twithonehandwhil
ereadi
ngthroughreport
thenl
ookedatthemessage.
Or
a:Heyf
ri
end,
lunch?
Mi
asmi
l
edt
henqui
ckl
yty
ped.
Mi
a: Ihav
egonor
rhea,
leav
emeal
one.
Or
a:Ar
eyounotdonewi
tht
het
reat
ment
?
Shel
aughed.
Mi
a: Tswamogonna!
Ora:Please …lunch,
gapeIdon’
tev
enunderstand
whyy ouarer
efusi
ngwhenIsawyounakedbeing
chasedbyaboy f
ri
end
Mi
a: Or
awee,
Iam wor
king.
Ora:
Iwon’
tst
opbot
her
ingy
out
il
lyouagr
eet
o
havi
ngl
unchwit
hme.
Mi
a: Icheatal
oti
nrel
ati
onshi
ps.
Ora:Becausey
ouar
enotget
ti
nggoodsex,
it’
s
underst
andabl
e
Mi
a: Mxm.
.
Or
a:Ok,
dinner
,atmyhouse.Iwi
l
lcook.Icancook.
Mi
a:Orat
il
ewee,youar
eagoodguy
,youdon’
tneed
mechangi
ngyou
Or
a:Sayar
ound7,Iwi
llgohomeear
lysoIcook.
Whatar
eyoual
ler
gict
o?
Mi
a:Goodguy
s .
Or
a: Gr
eat
,comet
hroughat7
Shesmil
edandputherphonedown.Acol
l
eague
walkedi
n.
“
HeyMi
a,Iam sel
l
ingt
heset
lhamma.
.”
“
Letmesee.
”
Mi
alookedatt
heheel
sthensmi
l
edt
aki
ngt
wopai
rs.
“
Iam t
aki
ngt
hese.Kennywoul
dlov
ethi
sones.
”
“
Ngng, don’
tbuyf
orbossl
ady
,Iwanthert
obuya
l
otofpair
s.”
Mi
alaughed.“
Heel
aletmebuyf
ormysi
ster
.”
Shetookoutmoneyfrom herhandbagthenpai
dand
gottheshoes.Shet
ookapi ct
ureoftheshoesand
sentthem t
oKenny.
Mi
a:Goty
out
hese.
Kenny
:Iam onmywayt
othehospi
tal
.Il
ovet
hem.
Mia:
Dit
salat
saJesodi
kae?(
Wher
eisJesus’
s
f
ri
ends?”
Kenny:At
sil
eapol
ogi
zedforbei
ngrudetomebut
Jesus’
sbrot
herwasasusual
,hatef
ul.
Mi
a:Mxm.
Kenny
:Seey
oul
ater
.Br
ingmyshoes.
Miaputdownherphoneandcont
inuedr
eadi
ng
t
hroughther
eport
s.
*
**

Atthehospit
al,
Kennywalkedinsi
deRona’
sroom
thenfr
ozestari
ngattheemptybed.Shequi
ckly
walkedout,
herheartpoundi
ngsomuch.She
bumpedintoanurse.
“
Hi,
wher
eisthemant
hatwasi
nthi
sroom?Ar
ona
Mot
samai
?”
“
Oh,
Mrs.Mot
samai
right
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Hehasbeenmov
ed.Hewokeupanhourago.
”
Kennyscr
eamed.“
Hedi
d?”
“
Yes.
”Shesmi
l
ed.“
Come.
”
Kennyfoll
owedaf t
erherthenopenedadoor.Kenny
walkedinthenlookedatRona.Hewasnot
connect
edt omachi nesandwasbreathi
ngonhis
own.Tearsfil
ledhiseyesasshewalkedoverand
l
ookedathi m.
“
Babe…”
Ronasl
owl
yopenedhi
sey
esandst
aredather
bl
ankl
y.
“
Babe…ohmyGod!
”
Shehuggedhi
m cr
ying.“
Iam sosor
ry.Iam so
sor
ry.
”
Ronajustst
aredathert
henKennypaused.“
It
’sme
babe.
.”
Hesi
l
ent
lyl
ookedather
.Kennyl
ookedatt
henur
se.
“
Whyi
she…whyi
shenotsay
ingany
thi
ng?Whyi
s
hel
ooki
ngatmel
i
ket
hat
?”
“
Uhh…”Thenursewalkedov
er.“Heshoul
dbef
ine.
l
etmecall
thedoctor
.”Shewalkedout
.
Kennytookhi
shand.“
Babe…babei
t’
sme.I
t’
s
Kenny.
”
“Otl
il
egony elaKenei
lwe,ontlwael
amasepawa
nkutl
wa.Iam goingtokil
lyouandbur nyourbody.O
ntl
waelaebil
egaonamai tseo,youmakemechase
aft
eryou.Ket l
i
legogobi l
etsabobeleteandyou
won’tl
ivetotel
lthestor
y.Youmustt hinkIam your
agemat e.
”
Kennyst
eppedbackstar
ingathim ashespokeso
col
dlyst
ari
ngather
,herheartpoundi
ng.
“
RonaIam sor
ry,
Idi
dn’
tsl
eepwi
thhi
m.
“Osekawabat
lagont
enakamaaka,
Iam goi
ngt
o
ki
ll
you.”
Tear
sfi
ll
edKenny
’sey
esasacol
dchi
l
lrandownher
spi
ne.
“
Don’tev
encryyet
.Youdon’
thavear
easont
ocr
y
y
et,
youar ey
etgoi
ngtohaveit
.”
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#127

Thedoctorwal
kedin,
Kennysteppedbackmor
eas
thedoct
oratt
endedtoRona.
“Ok,Iam goi
ngt
oasky
ouaf
ewper
sonal
questi
ons.”
“DocIam f
ine.Iknowev
ery
thi
ngandIr
emember
ever
ythi
ng.
”
Kenny
’sphoner
angt henRonalookedather.She
tooki
toutfr
om herhandbagt
henpi ckedwalki
ngout
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Kenny
,yourmeet
ingst
art
sint
enmi
nut
es.
”
“Ohshit
!UhIam st
il
latt
hehospi
tal
.Keepthem
busy
,letMi
astar
tthemeeti
ng.Iam comi
ng.”
“
Ok.
”
“
Shei
sinr
ight
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Ok,
Iam comi
ng.
”
Shehungupandwal kedbacki
nsi
det
her
oom.The
doct
orlookedatKenny.
“
LikeIexpl
ainedt
oyou,
hewon’
tbeabl
etowal
kfor
awhil
e.”
Kennynoddedasthedoctorwentonexplai
ninga
coupl
ethi
ngsthenfinal
lywal
kedout.Kennylooked
atRonawhowasgl ari
ngather.
“ThatwasmyPA.Uh…Iam happyy ouareawake.I
havebeenworri
edaboutyou.Theki
dsaregoi
ngt o
besohappytoseey ouawake.Iwi
ll
bri
ngthem l
ater.
Doy ouwantanyt
hing?
”
“
No.
”
“Ok…uhIwasgoingt
ocomelat
eronandcleanyou
upbutIcandoi
tnow.Letmegoandcol
lectyour
thi
ngsathome.
.”
Shewalkedoutfeel
i
nghiseyesonher
.Shet
ookout
herphonerushi
ngtohercar
.
“
Look,Iwon’
tmakei
tatt
hemeet
ing.Just
r
eschedul
eit
.”
“
Ok.
”
“Uhh…t oget
herwi t
hanymeeti
ngsIhadtoday.I
don’tthi
nkIwillcomeinatwor
ktoday.Bytheway,
cany oulookforahouseforme,afourbeds.Ani
ce
house.”
“
Afl
at?
”
“Yes.Ornot
,any
thi
ngi
sfi
neasl
ongasi
t’
sgood
house.”
“
Ok.
”
Shehungupunl
ocki
nghercart
henshej
umpedi
n
andspedhome.

*
**

Tshenol
owaitedforKgosi
thensmi
l
edashewal
ked
overandsatopposi
teherwit
hasmil
e.
“
Hey
…”
Shepausedsmili
ngl
ooki
ngathisbr
uisedhands.
“Whathappenedtoy
ourhand?
”
“
Not
hing.
”
“
Itdoesn’
tlookl
i
kenot
hing.
”
“Ihadtodefendmysel
f.Thi
sisjai
lbabe…y
ou
alwayshavetodef
endy our
sel
f.
”
Shel
ookedathim.God,whydidhelooksogood?
Shef
oundhersel
fsmil
ingstar
ingathim.
“
Howi
syourboy
fri
end?Tol
dtheki
dsy
et?
”
Sheshookherhead.“
Theyt
hinkwear
ejustf
ri
ends.
”
“Andreacant
hinkbabe.Noneedt
ohi
dei
tfr
om
him.”
“
Iam j
ust
…Idon’
twantt
hem t
othi
nkany
onei
s
r
epl
aci
ngyou.
”
“
Noonecanev
err
epl
aceme.Doy
oul
ovehi
m?”
Tearsf
il
ledherey
es.“
Yes,
butIf
eel
li
keIam
betr
ayi
ngy ou.
”
“
Youarenotbet
ray
ingme.Youdeser
vebet
tert
han
wai
ti
ngforaguywhoisi
njai
l.
”
“
Whati
fyouev
ergetout
?”
“
Idon’
tknow.
”
“
Youar
egoi
ngt
omov
eon?
”
Heshruggedthensmil
ed.“Iam sur
ebyt
heny
ou
woul
dbeagr andmother.Iwil
lj
ustl
ookf
ormyown
ol
dladyandstaywit
hher .
”
Tshenol
olaughed.“
Iwil
lnotl
ety
ouhav
epeace.I
wil
lbeanexf r
om hel
l.
”
Kgosi
touchedherhandst
henki
ssedher
.
“
Kgosi
!”
Hesmil
edmov
ingbackbi
ti
nghi
slowerl
i
p.“
Imi
ss
you.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Imi
ssy
out
oo.
”
“
Iwantt
ofucky
ousobad.I
t’
sbeenawhi
l
e.”
“
Youar enotsneakingout.Youarenotgoi
ngt
ohav
e
alongersent
encingjustf
orsex.”
“
Goodsex.
”
“
No!Thi
nkofy
ourki
ds.
”
Hesi
ghed.“
Ok.Youl
ookgood.Thi
ckt
oo.
”
Sheblushedstari
ngathim asheundr essedherwit
h
hereyes.Shecouldseewhathewast hinki
ngandit
tur
nedheronsomuchshecoul djustl
ieonthetabl
e
andlethim pushint
hatdickthenfuckhersohard
ti
ll
shecomesal l
overhi
m.Shesi ghed.
“
Stop…”
Hel
ookedatherwi
thanaught
ysmi
l
e.“
Stopwhat
?”
“
Doi
ngt
hat
.”
“
Fuck.Iwanty
ousobad.Iwantt
ofucky
ou.
”
“
Youneedt
obehav
e.”
“
Iam goi
ngt
omakeaplan.Keepthatboyaway,I
wantt
ofi
ndmypussyt
ightandsweet.Am Icl
ear
?”
Shelookedinhi
sey
esknowi
nghewasn’
tjoki
ngt
hen
nodded.“Ok.
”
“
Good.Go.Iwantt
owat
chy
ouwal
kaway
.”
Shelookedathi
mt henst
oodupandcatwal
kedout
l
ett
inghimlookatherbut
t.
Shegotinhercaranddr
oveoffheadedtot
hemall
.
Sheparkedhercarandwal
kedinsi
dethemall
toget
herl
unch.
“
Hey
…”
Shesmi
l
edst
ari
ngatMot
husi
.“Hi
!”
“
Otenggor
iana?
”
Tshenol
osmi l
ed.“
Yeah.TheotherdayIsawy our
famil
yonfacebookandlaughedrecal
li
ngthosedays
whenweusedt othi
nkitwouldbey ouandKenny.”
“
Til
lImessedi
tup.
”
“
It
’spar
tofl
i
fe,
buty
ouhav
eav
erybeaut
if
ulwi
fe.
”
“
Thanks.Howi
sKenny
?”
“
Shei
sfi
ne.
”
“
Ok,
niceseei
ngy
ouNol
o.”
“
Yout
oo.
”
Shewal
kedaway
.

*
**
Apri
ll
ookedatt
hedoorasAt si
l
ewal kedinhol
ding
sampandbeanswit
haSt oneyfizzydri
nk.Her
mouthwater
edasshelookedatt hefood.
“
Hey
…Ibr
oughty
oul
unch.
”
Heputitbef
oreherwhi l
eshei gnoredhim.He
l
ookedatherfeetthenwal kedtothebedr oom and
camebackwi t
hthemassageoi lhehadpur chased
weeksback.Hesatbesidehert hent ookherfeet
andstar
tedmassagi ngher.Sherelaxedstari
ngat
hi
m massageherf eetsi
lently
.Whenhewasdone,
hegotupandr et
urnedthemassageoi l.
“
Iam goi
ngt
owor
know.
”
Shekeptqui
etstari
ngathiswrinkl
edshirtand
tr
ouser
,shestaredathi
m badlywantingtogivehi
m
i
ronedcl
othesbutshelookedaway .Secondslat
er
sheheardRona’
sothercardri
vingoff.Shetookher
phoneandcall
edheraunt.
“
Apr
il
..
”
“
Iam begi
nni
ngt
ofeel
sor
ryf
orhi
m.”
“
Youar
eal
l
owedt
obutdon’
tlosef
ocus.Hehasn’
t
ev
enst
art
edt
osuf
fer
.”
“Helooksl
ikealostboy.Iwonderhowheisholdi
ng
hismeeti
ngslooki
nglikethat
.Iwonderwhati
tsays
aboutme.”
“
Wenadon’tt
hinkoft
hosethi
ngs.Justfocuson
y
our
sel
f.Lett
hatboysuff
erali
tt
lemor e.
”
“
Ket
swer
ekenopa.(
Iam hor
ny.
)”
Herauntl
aughed.“
Jeso!
”
“AndIbadl
ywantit.Whenev
erIstar
eatit,
Iwanti
t
andit
’sbeenweeks.NnaIcan’
tanymore.Can’
the
givemesexwhil
eIam angry?”
Herauntl
aughedhar
der
.“Themomenthegi v
esi
tto
you,
youaregoingt
ofor
getall
youranger
.”
“
Iwon’
tgi
vehi
m backt
het
hings.
”
“
Allheneedsisagoodangl
etohavey
ousi
ngi
nghi
s
t
une.Can’ty
ouservi
ceyour
sel
f?”
“YhoauntyItri
edbutngng…Iwanthim.Iwanthi m
sobad,Idon’tevenknowwhattodoany more.Nna
kebatl
adick.Iwakeupt oitonmybutteomel et
si
goreandallIwantisforhi
mt osl
i
deitinandjust
scr
atcht
hei
tch.Iwanthi
mtoki
ssmewhi
l
efucki
ng
me.”
“
Haai
i
,thenIr
estmycase.
”
“
Aker
emmeIwon’
tgi
vebackt
het
hings.
”
“
Okmygi
rl
.”
“
Apr
ilhungupandcal
l
edherman.
“
Babe.
.”
“
Comeback.Iwantsex.
”
“
Ok.Twomi
nut
es.
”
Shegotupandundr essedthenwaitedforhi
m naked.
Minutesl
aterAtsil
ewal kedinandlookedather.
Wi t
houtwait
ingforhert ochangehermind,he
hurri
edoverandkissedhert hentur
nedheraround
taki
ngouthisdick.
“
Condom.
”
“
Idon’
thav
econdoms.
”
“
Goandbuy.Whydidn’
tyoubuyonyourwayback?
Obat
lagonnel
aHIV?(Youwanttogi
vemeHI V?)”
“
Idon’
thav
eH.
.-l
etmegot
othet
uckshop.
”
Hehurri
edout.Awhil
elaterhewalkedbackin
openi
ngthecondom t
henhet ookitoutandputi ton
befor
eturni
ngherar
oundandpushedi n.April
moanedast hedi
ckstr
etchedit
’swayinside.Atsil
e
hel
dherwaistandst
artedpoundingint
oher .

*
**

Backatthehospi
tal
,Kennywalkedwit
hRona’s
thi
ngsinsi
dehisr
oom thenpausedstar
ingata
womanl aughi
ngwit
hhim.Shet ur
nedasKenny
recogni
zedCandy.
“
HeyKenny
!Ohmywor
d!Beent
ime…”
Kennyf
orcedasmi
l
est
ari
ngather
.“Yeah…”
“Therewassomeonei nt hi
sroom whom Icamet
o
seeandIam justheari
ngnowt hatshewas
dischar
ged,buti
t’
sreal
lyseeingyoutwo.”She
turnedtoRona.“
Ihopey ougetbett
ersoon.”
“
Yaht
hanks.
”
“
Okby
e.By
eKenny
!”
“
Bye.
”
Candywal
kedoutt
henKennyl
ookedatRona.
“
Whatwasshedoi
ngher
e?”
“Osekawampotsamasepa.(
Don’taskmeshi
t.
)
Leave,
Idon’
tev
enwanttoseeyourface.
”
“
Iwantt
ocl
eany
ouup.
”
“
Iam sur
eanur
sewi
l
ldot
hat
.”
“
Nonurseisgoi
ngt
otouchy
ouexpectme.Iam y
our
wi
fe,
Iwil
ldoit.
”
“
Getout
!”
“
Iam notgoi
ngany
wher
e.”
“
Kenei
l
we,
Iam notgoi
ngt
orepeatmy
sel
f.Getout
!”
“
Iam notgoi
nganywhere.Whydi
dn’
tyout
ell
me
t
hatEsit
ouchedyourdi
ck?”
“
Wel
lIsl
eptwi
thhert
oowhi
l
eyouwer
einj
ail
!”
“
Youwhat
?”
“
Cany
oul
eav
e?”
“
Yousl
eptwi
thhert
oo?
”
“
Kenei
l
wepl
easego.
”
“
No…r
epeatwhaty
ouj
ustsai
d.Yousl
eptwi
thher
?”
“
No.Ij
ustwanty
out
oleav
e.”
“Youarely
ing.Yousl
eptwi
thher
.Youwoul
dnev
er
sayitunl
essyoudid.
”
“
Arey
oucr
azy
?”
Tear
sfi
l
ledherey
es.“
Iam notcr
azy
.Yousai
dyou
sl
eptwi
thher
.”
“
Obv
iousl
ynotmeani
ngi
t.
”
“
Youar
ely
ing!Youar
ely
ing!
”
“
Say
stheper
sonwhowassl
eepi
ngar
ound.
”
“
Yousl
eptwi
thEsi
whi
l
eIwasi
njai
l
.”
“
Kenny
…”
Shepickedthebucketandst
art
edhi
tt
inghi
m wi
thi
t.
“Yousleptwit
hEsi?”
“
Stop!
”
Shehi
thi
m har
derast
hebucketcr
acked.
“
Myf
ri
end!Myf
ri
end!
”
Ronapressedtheemer
gencybut
ton.Kennypul
l
ed
hi
slegsfrom t
hebed.
“
Kennyst
opi
t!
”
Thenursewal
kedi
nthenr
ushedt
oKennypul
l
ingher
back.
“
Stopi
t!Someonecal
lsecur
it
y!”
RonaheldontothebedasKennytri
edtopull
him
offt
hebed.Thesecuri
tywal
kedinthenpul
l
edher
back.Shel
ookedatRonabreat
hingfi
re.
“Myfri
endwhi
leIwasi
njail
?Howl
ongdi
dthi
s
happen?Thewhol
efi
veyears?
”
Ronalookedatherassheboi
l
edwi
thanger
.“Ihav
e
never
…Iwasj ust
-“
Shet
ookof
fhershoeandhi
thi
sheadwi
thi
t.“
Liar
!”
Thesecuri
typul
l
edheroutthenwentbackforher
thi
ngsandescort
edherout.Shegoti
nhercarthen
droveof
fheadedtoEsi
’shouse.
*
**

Meanwhil
eRona’shear
tpoundedsomuchasal ot
oft
hingsr
anthroughhi
shead.Thenur
selookedat
hi
m.
“
Youneedt
ocal
m down,
yourbl
oodpr
essur
e-“
“
Bor
rowmey
ourphone.Pl
ease,
it’
sanemer
gency
.”
Thenursegavei
ttohi
mthenhecal
l
edhi
swi
febut
herphonerangf
rom t
hef
loor
.
“
OhGodIam f
ucked.
”
.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#128

Atsi
lelookedatApr i
lasshebr eathedheavil
yclosi
ng
hereyesexhausted.Hepul ledof fthecondom then
star
edatherasshecr adledherbump.Hecov ered
herwithaduv etthendressedupandwal kedout.He
wenttot heli
vi
ngr oom andpi ckedhisphone
walki
ngout .Hejumpedi nhi sbrother’
scarashi s
phoner ang.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Mr.Mot
samai
,MsMasi
l
oisher
e.”
“
Ok,
Iwi
l
lbet
her
einuhh15mi
nut
est
ops.
”
“
Yessi
r.
”
Hestar
tedt
hecarandr
ever
sedoutt
hendr
ovet
o
wor
k.Anunknownnumbercal
l
ed.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
…”
Hi
shear
tski
pped.“
Rona?
”
“
Yah…uhImessedup.
”
“
What
’sup?
”
“Iwil
ltel
lyoubutgot
oEsi
’
shouse…ahshi
t,my
chest…”
“
Arey
ouok?
”
“No.I…gotoEsi
’shouse, matt
eroffact,
callEsi
and
tel
lherKennyi
scomi ng.IfMaatl
aisthere,
she
shouldmakesuretheyleave.Oetl
a.(Sheis
coming.)
”
“
What ’
sgoi
ngon?Idon’
tunder
stand.Whatar
eyou
t
alki
ngabout?
”
“
Kennyisgoingt
oEsi’
shouse,
cal
lEsi
andt
ell
her
t
hatKennyiscoming.
”
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Cany
ouj
ustdowhatIam t
ell
i
ngy
ou?
”
“Ok…howareyoufeel
ing?Youshouldtakei
teasy.
YouknowIwasthinki
ngaboutwhathappenedwith
youandKennyandtobehonest,mist
akeshappen.I
don’
tthi
nkKennywould-“
“
DowhatIam t el
li
ngyouandstayoutofmy
marr
iage.That
’snoneofanyone’sbusi
nessonl
ymy
wi
feandI ,
dowhatIam tel
li
ngy ou.
.”
“
Ok.
”
Ronahungup.At
sil
etr
iedEsi
’
snumber
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,Ronai
sawake.
”
“
OhmyGod!
”
“
Yeah…hej
ustcal
l
edme.
”
“
ThankGod.
”
“
Hesai
dKennyi
scomi
ngt
her
e.”
“
What
?Why
?”
“Idon’
tknowbuthesai
difMaatlai
sther
eyou
shouldmakesur
ey oul
eavebecauseshei
scomi
ng.
”
“
Uhok.
”
“
Sur
e.”
Hehungupdr
ivi
ngt
owor
k.
*
**

Moesi putdownt hephoneconfused.Acardr

ovein
outsi
deandsecondsl at
erKennyopenedthedoor
walki
ngi n.Moesilookedatherangryf
acewit
ha
fr
ownconf used.
“
Whatdoy
ouwant
?”
“
Wher
eisMaat
la?
”
“
Nother
easy
oucanseewhatdoy
ouwant
?”
“
Moesi
,yousai
dyoudi
dn’
ttouchRona’sdi
ckand
t
hatWazhai
smakingi
tup.Shedi
dn’tseeproper
ly.
”
“
Kenei
l
we,
whati
sgoi
ngon?
”
“No.Answerme.Yousai
dyoudi
dn’
ttouchRonas
dicki
sn’
tit
?”
“Whatdoy
ouwantf
rom me?Idi
dn’
ttouchRona’
s
dick.
”
“
Iguessy
oual
sodi
dn’
tsl
eepwi
thhi
m whenIwasi
n
j
ail
.”
Moesi
’
shear
tst
art
edpoundi
ngasshel
ookedat
Kennyadv
anci
ngt
oher
.“What
?”
“
Younev
ersl
eptwi
thhi
m whi
l
eIwasi
njai
l
?”
“
Kenny
,doy
ouheary
our
sel
f?”
“
Icanper
fect
lyhearmy
sel
f.
”
Sheswal
l
owedshaki
ng.“
Yousoundcr
azy
.”
“
Isoundcr
azy
?Isoundcr
azy
?”
Shetookadeepbr
eatht
ryi
ngtocal
m her
sel
f.“
Look,
Idon’
tknowwhatyouwantfr
om meand-
“
“
Didy
ouordi
dyounotsl
eepwi
thmyhusband?
”
“
Whatar
eyousmoki
ng?
”
Angr
il
yKennywalkedoverandslappedheracr
oss
thef
aceasherangert
ookov er
.“Whatam Ismoki
ng?
Youwantt
oknowwhatIam smoki ng?
”
Esi
pushedKenny
.“Getoutofmyhouse!
”
“
Didyousl
eepordi
dyounotsl
eepwi
thmyhusband
Moesi
?!
”
“
Get
-“
Kennyangr
il
ypunchedher
.Moesi
stagger
edbackas
Kennycamef orher
.Shegrabbedhert
opand
punchedheragainevenhar
der.
“
Didy
ousl
eepwi
thmyhusband?
!”
Moesil
ookedatangr
yKennybl
eedi
ngf
rom her
mouth.
“
Letmego.Iam goi
ngt
orepor
tyou.
”
Kennypunchedheragai
n.Moesiscreamedpushing
Kennybackwithal
lherst
rengt
hthenslappedher
.
“
Youwhor
e!Myman!
”
Kennysl appedMoesi .Wi t
hherheartpounding,
Moesi pickedt hedecoderandsmashedKenny ’
s
headwi thit.Kennybi therlowerli
ppunchingMoesi
whostagger edfal
lingt henshesatonherand
punchedhersev eraltimes.Moesi cr
iedi
npai n
punchi
ngKenny ’
sboobt henbitKenny’
sthumb.
Kennyr eachedf orthedecoderwi ththeotherhand
andhitMoesi ’
sheadt hatsheletgoofherthumb
cry
inginpai n.
“
Kenny
!”
“
Myman?
!”
“
Kenny
’sst
op!Iam pr
egnant
.”
Shehi
tMoesi
’sheadacoupl
eofti
meswit
hdecoder
bef
oret
hrowi
ngitof
fandpunchi
ngEsi
’
sfaceangr
il
y.
“
Myman!
”
“
Kennypl
easest
op.Pl
ease…y
ouar
eki
l
li
ngme.
”
Shegr abbedputherhandsonhert hr
oatstangli
ng
her.Esitr
iedpushi
ngof fKennybutKennyusedal l
herstrengthandstaredatEsiasshetri
edtofight.
Kennygotof fherf
eel i
ngweakaspainsipped
thr
oughherbones, tearsrunni
ngdownhercheeks.
“
Myman!
”
Moesibrokedowncryingi
npai
nasshest
oodup.“
I
am sor
ry.Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Youwer
esupposedt
obemyf
ri
end!
”
“Iam sor
ry.Itwasamistake.Wewer edrunkand…
anditwasonl yoner
ound.Itwasn’teventhatgood.
Webot hfeltgui
lt
y…Kenny….List
ent ome…i twasa
mistake.
”
Kennyl
ookedathershaki
ngwhi
l
ecr
ying.“
Yousai
d
youwer
emysi st
er!
”
“
Iam sor
ry.Iam sor
ry.Iam sor
ry.
”
“Thenyouwentaheadandtouchedhi
sdi
ck?What
aboutt
hat?Wereyoudrunkthen?Wer
eyoudrunk?
”
“NoIwasj
ustseei
ngi
f…Iwasj
ust
..i
twasami
stake
and-
“
Kennysl
appedher
.“Bi
tch!
”
Moesit
ri
edtosl
apherbagbutKennyhel
dherhand
andsl
appedher
.
“
Stopfi
ghti
ngme.Iam notfighti
ngyou.
”Moesi
l
ookedathercr
ying.“
Iam sorry
.Imadeamistake-
“
“
Yousl
eptwi
thmyhusband!Yousl
eptwi
thhi
m
whi
l
eIwasinj
ail
!”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Howcoul
dyou?
”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“Howcoul
dyou?I
sthatwhyy
ousuddenl
yhat
eme?
Becausey
ouwantRona?”
“
No.No…Idon’
twantRona.Kennyi
twasami
stake.
”
“
Youwer
esupposedt
ohav
emyback.
”
Moesi
pressedherl
i
pscr
ying.“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“Youweresupposedtobemysi st
er.Yousai
dyou
weremysister…youweresupposedtohavemy
backnottostabmeintheback…”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
Kennytur
nedcr y
ing.Shecr
iedsol
oudasherhear
t
br
okeseveral
times
Moesi l
ookedatherthenreachedforherphoneand
dial
edthepoli
ce.KennyturnedbackasMoesi held
thephonetoherearthensher eachedforglassjar
onthetableandsmashedi tonherhead.Moesi
droppedthephonefaint
ing.Kennypickedthephone
andhungupst ar
ingatMoesi .ShelookedatMoesi .
“
Youwer esupposedt
obeaf
ri
endy
oubackst
abbi
ng
t
hing….
”
Shestar
edatherf
orawhil
esil
ent
lycr
yingthen
walkedoutoft
hehousel
ocki
ngheri
nside.
Shegoti
nhercaranddr
oveof
f.
*
**

Atthehospit
al,
Kennywalkedinwit
hthesecur
it
y
guardexhaust
edandlookedatRona.
“
Kenny
…-“
Shelaughedt
henstart
edcryi
ng.Thesecur
ityguar
d
l
ookedatherconfusedasshecri
edlaughi
ng.She
st
oppedandlookedatherhusband.
“Gasegor eredi
vorcehel
aner r
a?(
Shouldn’
twejust
div
or ce?
)Itshoul
dn’tbel
ikethi
s…Iknowitshoul
dn’
t
belikethi
s…”Shechuckled,t
earsr
oll
ingdownher
cheeks.
“
Youar
ebl
eedi
ng.
”
Shesi
ghed.“
IbeatMoesi.IneverknewIcoul
dbeat
someonewit
habiggerbodyt hanmine,
damnitfel
t
good.
”
Ronachuckl
ed.“
Youneedmedi
cal
att
ent
ion.
”
“
Iwhoopedherass.
”
“
Youneedadoct
or.
”
“Ineedy out odivorcemeRona. ”Shel aughedcr ying
thenwal kedov erandcuppedhi sf ace.“ Ineedy out o
divorcemebabe.It oldmy selfwheny ouwer elying
ont hisbedf i
ghtingf ory ourlifethatIwoul dfightf or
ourmar r
iage.IsaidIam notgoi ngt owal kaway
becauseIl ovet hismansomuch.Iev enwentand
boughtanexpensi v
ecar …r athery oubemadabout
mespendi ngy ourmoney .
”Shechuckl ed.“Itold
my selfevenifhebeat smeorwhat ever,Iwasnot
goingt ogoany wher ebecauseIam Mr s.Rona
Mot samai ….Imety ouy earsbackandy ouar ethe
onlymanIknowhowt olov e.Idon’ tknowhowt o
l
ov eany oneelse.I t
’shasbeeny ouandi t’
salway s
you.”Shet ouchedhi sbear d.“Butt hepai nistoo
muchbabe.Wehav ehur teachot hersomuchi t’s
toomuch.Lov eshoul dn’tbel ikethis.
Ronalookedatherasshecr
ied,
tear
sfi
l
li
nghi
sown
eyes.
“
Pleasedivorceme.Myheartispainful
.Ican’
tleav
e
youbecauseIloveyousosomuch.Iam notev en
t
hinki
ngofl eavi
ngbecauseIcan’
tleavetheperson
whoIlovewhol ehear
tedl
ybutIam inpain.Ican’
t
i
magi nemyt omorrowwi thouty ou.Buti tshouldn’t
beliket hisbabe.I tshouldn’tbel i
ket his.Youknowi t
.
Pleasedi v orcemebecauseIwon’ tdoi t,maybeIam
j
ustnott heonef ory ou.Idon’tknow…Ev erysingle
dayt hepai ngetst oomuchandIt hinkIam losi ngit
.
Ican’tt hi
nkbey ondy ou.Ihurtyou, Iknow….Iam
sorry.Al lIwast hinkingwashur t i
ngy oubackandI …
Iam sor r
y .Iam sor r
y.”Sheshookherheadcr y ing.
“Thisi snotme.Idon’ tevenknowwho’ sme
anymor e.Pl easedi v
orceme. .
.itshoul dn’tbelike
thi
s.”
Thesecur
it
yguywalkedout.Ronaki
ssedherwet
l
ipst
hensmi l
ed,
atearrol
l
ingdownhischeek.
“
Rememberourf
ir
stni
ghtt
oget
her
?”
Shesmiledcr
ying.“Ir
ememberev er
ythi
ng.I
remembereveryt
hing.Everytouchyoumade….Every
partofmybodyy ourl
ipstouched…Ir emember
….”
Ronahuggedher.“If
ellevenmor einlov
ewi thyou,I
tookaleapoffai
th…Igaveitalland…howIf eel
hasn’
tchangedbabe.Ithasn’t
.Itwil
lneverchange.I
knowthiski
ndofloveistoxic.I
t’scr
azy.It
’spainf
ul.
I
t’
s…f un.Iknow…i ftoxicwasat hing,i
twoul dbeus
butthat ’
sus.Therecanonl ybeoney ou.Ther eis
onl
yoneKenei lweMot samaiandmyhear tsay sit
’s
her.Itreal
lycannev erbeany oneelse.Justy ouMma
Mot samai .Il
oveyouandnoonei sleavi
ngt his
mar ri
age.WhenIsai dIdo, Isaidtheonlythingt hat
wil
l makeusoar tway swill
bedeat h.Noonei s
dead.”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Noty
et.
”
Ronasmil
ed.“
Yeahsot
il
lthen,
wewi
l
lwor
kthi
ngs
thr
ough.
”
Ronakissedhert
hensmi
l
edst
ari
ngatherbeaut
if
ul
face.
“
Isshedead?
”
Sheshr
ugged.“
Shef
aint
edIt
hink.Idon’
tknow.
”
“
Ok.Li
edownwi
thme.
”
Kennygotonthebedandl
aybesi
dehi
m,herhead
onhischest
.
“
Ibeatherr
eal
l
yhar
d,Imi
ghtgot
ojai
l
.”
Ronachuckl
ed.“
Jai
li
syoursecondhome.
”
Kennyr
aisedherheadl
aughi
ng.“
Stop!
”
Helaughed.“
Sorr
y.Wewil
ldeal
wit
hit
.Noonei
s
goi
ngtojail
.Il
oveyou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
.
.
Dol
eav
eal
i
keandacomment
,goodni
ght
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#129

Esislowlywokeupt henheldherheadasi tached.

Shelookedar oundt hehousethengotup.She
l
ookedar oundf orherphonebutt herewasnot hing
thenshewal kedtot hedoor.Shefrownedr eali
zingit
wasl ockedthenwentt oherbedroom.Shest aredat
herselfonthemi r
ror,herfacewasswol l
en.Sheev en
hadabl ueeye.Tear srandownhercheekt henshe
walkedt oherbathroom whereshet ookthe
pregnancystickandl ookedatit
.
Shelookedatt hetwolinest henputherhandsover
herfacecrying.Aft
ermi nutesofcryi
ng,shetooka
showerthenchangedandpackedasmal lbagwit
h
herbelongings.Shetookt hesparekeysthen
unl
ockedt hedoorandwal kedout.

*
**
Latert
hatday,Mi
awalkedparkedbesi
desOra’
scar
thensteppedout
.Sheknockedonthedoor
,Ora
openedwi t
hasmileweari
nganapron.
“
Hey
…”
Shesmi
l
edback.“
Hi.
”
“
Comei
n.”
Heopenedthewiderthenshewal
kedi
nbr
eat
hingi
n
t
hedeli
ciousar
omai ntheair
.
“
Smel
l
sni
ce.
”
“
Comet
hissi
de.
”
Hetookherhandandl
edhert
ohi
ssi
tt
ingr
oom.“
Sit
down.”
Shesatdownt
henhebr
oughtagl
assofj
uicef
orher
.
“
Iam f
ini
shi
ngup.Youcanwat
chTV.
”
Hewalkedtot
heki
tchenandcamebackwi
tha
gl
assofjui
ce.
“
Thanks.
”
Or
asmi
l
edandwentt
otheki
tchenwher
ehe
fi
nishedupcooki
ng.Mi
aki ckedoffherheel
sthen
stoodupandfoll
owedhim.Shelookedathim ashe
di
shedl i
ket
heydidatr
estaurant
s.
“
Wher
edi
dyoul
ear
ntocook?
”
“
Mymot
hert
aughtme.Shel
ovescooki
ngsomuch.
”
“
Youdon’
tmeetal
otofmenwhocancook.
”
“
Iam oneoft
hef
ew.
”
Sheputherjui
ceont
heki
tchencount
erst
henhoped
ontopstar
ing.
“OkIam l
yi
ng.Ior
der
edt
hef
ood.Iam j
usthi
tt
ingi
t
up.
”
Mi
alaughed.“
Whatawow!
”
Heshr
ugged.“
Any
thi
ngt
oear
nmor
epoi
nts.
”
“
Wher
eisy
ourgi
rl
fr
iend?
”
Or
alookedather
.“Webr
okeup.
”
“
Why
?”
“
Shehadat emper,
whenangryshewouldsay
what
everandIcoul
dn’
tdealwit
hitany
more.Ther
e
ar
emenwhocanhandl
eit
.Idon’
tandwon’
thandl
e
di
srespect
.”
“
Whendi
dyoubr
eakupwi
thher
?”
“
Thr
eemont
hsback.
”
Miasippedherj
uice.“
Ok.Howmanychi
l
drendoy
ou
have?
”
Hel
aughed.“
Two.
”
“
Age?
”
“
Onei
ssi
xandt
heot
heri
sfour
.”
“
Samebabymama?
”
“
No.Two.
”
Mi
asi
ghed.“
Wennar
ra!
”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Theyar
epeacef
ul.
”
“Whydoy ouhavet
wobabymamas,andtheywi
l
l
probabl
ybethreei
fyouchooset
omoveon.”
“
Wit
hyouy
es.
”
Sherol
l
edhereyes.“
NnaIdon’tl
i
kedikgangtsabo
babymama.(Idon’
tli
kebabymamaissues.)
”
“
OnceIbreakupwit
hyouMi
a,Idon’
tcomeback.
Whataboutyou?
”
“
Itol
dyou.
”
“Youonl
ytol
dmey
ouhadGonor
rhea.Howdi
dyou
geti
t?”
“
Howel
secoul
dIhav
egot
teni
t?”
“
Yourboy
fri
end?
”
“
Isai
dIcheataloti
nrel
ati
onshi
ps.I
fy out
houghtI
wasj
ustsayi
ngit,
Iwasn’
t.Myboyfr
iendbrokeup
wi
thme.It
’sbeenweeks.
”
“
Didy
oul
ovehi
m?”
Mi
anodded.“
Yes.
”
“
Doyout
hinki
fgi
vent
hechance,
youwoul
dgoback
t
ohi
m.”
“Heisnotgoi ngtoforgi
vemesoIam notgoi ngto
all
owmy selft
ohavehopesonsomet hingthatwil
l
neverhappen.It’
sli
keaf t
erbreaki
ngacupt henIsay
i
fIdidn’tbreak,wouldIdri
nkoni t
…itbroke.That’
sit.
Thinki
ngaboutdr i
nkinginiti
fitdi
dn’tbreakwheni t
actual
lybrokeisstupid.
”
Orasmiled.“
Ok.
”Heputhi
shandsonherwai
stand
putherdown.
“
Let
’sgoandeat
.”
Theywalkedwi
ththei
rpl
atest
othesi
tt
ingr
oom
thensatdowneat
ing.
“
Eachchi
l
dst
ayswi
thhi
sorhermot
her
?”
“Yes.If
igur
editwasbett
ert
hatway
.Igett
hem on
weekendsandholiday
s.Soi
nyourf
amil
y,y
ouonly
haveonesister
?”
“Yes.Sortof
.Kennyi
smymot
her
’sdaught
erbutwe
don’tshareafat
her
.”
“
Real
l
y?”
“Yes.Mymotherhastwoki
dsonl
y.Myf
atherhad
kidsbutt
heydon’
tli
keme.”
“
Wow.
”
“Ir
eall
ydon’tcar
eaboutt
hose.Aft
ermyf
ather
passed,Iguessi
twasovert
hen.”
“
Whendi
dhedi
e?”
“
WhenIwasst
il
lyoung.
”
“
Soy
ougr
ewupwi
thy
ourmom onl
y?”
“
Yes.
”
Or
anodded.“
NowIunder
stand.
”
“
Under
standwhat
?”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Not
hing.Eat
.”
Shestar
tedeat
ingasheswi
tchedbackt
oli
ght
topi
cs.

*
**

Maatlapar
kedhi scari
nfr
ontofEsi’
shousethen
fr
ownedsteppingoutnotseei
nghercar.Heknocked
onherdoortakingouthi
sri
ngingphonefrom hi
s
pocket.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Maat
la…”
“
Hey
,wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
UhhIhadt
ogoandseemymot
her
.”
“
What
?”
“
Iam notf
eel
i
ngt
oowel
l
,Imi
ssher
.”
“
Didy
out
aket
het
est
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
And?
”
“
Iam pr
egnant
.”
Hecl
osedhi
sey
es.“
Doy
ouwantt
okeept
hebaby
?”
“
Whatdoy
oumean?
”
“
Doy
ouwantt
okeepi
t?”
“
Yes.Iam notgoi
ngt
oki
l
lmychi
l
d.”
Hesmiled.“
Ican’
tbel
i
eveIam goi
ngt
obeadad
agai
n.”
Esi
laughed.“
Youar
eal
readyadad.
”
“
Iam goi
ngt
obeadadt
oababy
.”
“
Ihopei
t’
sagi
rl
.”
Helaughed.“Metoo.Ial
readyhav
ethreeboy
s.
Whenarey oucomingback?ShouldIcomeandsee
you?”
“No.Iwi
l
lbeher
eforaweeksot
henIwi
l
lcome
back.
”
“
Ohok.Wher
eisy
ourphone?
”
“Uhi
t’
swit
hKenny.Iacci
dental
l
ylef
titi
nhercar
.
Youcangoandcol
lectfr
om her.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Bye.
”
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Shehungupt henMaat
lagoti
nhi
scaranddr
ovet
o
thehospi
tal
.

*
**

Atthehospi
tal
,Ronasmil
edashispar
entswalkedi
n.
Hismotherhur
ri
edoverandhuggedhercr
ying.
“
Modi
mokeal
ebogo.(
Thanky
ouGod.
)”
Ronasmi
l
ed.“
Iam f
ine.
”
Hi
smot herl
ookedathi
m cry
ing.“Icoul
dn’
tst
op
f
asti
ng.Iwasworri
edaboutyou.”
“
Iam f
inenow.
”
Hi
smot herl
ookedatt
hestr
ipbandageonhi
s
f
orehead.“
Whathappenedt
here?
”
“
Justal
i
ttl
eacci
dent
.”
“
Thedoct
orsai
dyouwoul
dn’
tbeabl
etowal
k.”
“
Yeahbuti
t’
stempor
ary
.”
Hi
sfat
hersmi
l
ed.“
Son…”
Ronasmi
l
ed.“
Papa.
.”
“
Wewer
eal
lwor
ri
ed.
.”
“
Iam f
inenow.
”
At
sil
ewalkedinandsmil
edhuggi
ngRona.“
Damn
wethoughty
ouwer egoi
ngt
odie.
”
Ronalaughed.Waai
i
iIam st
il
lar
ound.Wher
eis
Apri
l
?”
“
Shei
sathome.
”
Kennyopenedt
hedoorandwal
kedi
n.Shepaused
star
ingatev
ery
onet
henmmagweRonashookher
head.
“
Obat
lang?(
Whatdoy
ouwant
?)”
“
Iam her
etoseemyhusband.
”
MmagweRonat urnedbackt oherson.“ItoldyouI
didn’
tli
ket hi
swoman, nowy ouseewhatImeant ?
Shealmostki l
ledyou.Shedoesn’ tevenrespectyou.
Maatlasaidsheev enbr oughtherboyfri
endher eand
waskissinghim whiley oufoughtforyourli
fe.She
doesn’tdeservetobey ourwifeebileIneverwantto
seeherf aceeveragain.Kotengthisbehaviorrunsin
herfamily.”
“
Keneil
weismywi f
e.Whateverwegot hroughinour
mar
riagehasnothingtodowi t
hanyoneel seexpect
meandher.Idon’tknowwhaty ouheard,Idon’tcar
e,
mywifeandIwil
l sol
veourissuespri
vately.
”
“What?Youneedt odivorcethi
swoman!Oneday
sheisgoingtokill
you.Shedoesn’tr
espectnorvalue
thi
smar r
iage.Sheisnowi f
ebecausenowi f
e
behavesli
kethis.Onedayy ouwil
lgotojai
lbecause
ofthewifeyoupicked.Sheisnotgoodforyou.”
“MamaKeneilweismywi f
eandevery
onewil
l
respectt
hat
.Iwil
lhandl
emymar r
iageaf
fai
rs
priv
atel
y.
”
MmagweRonashookherhead.“
Shebewi
tched
you.
”
“
Mama-
“
“Shebewit
chedy
ou!Shef
edyousomethi
ng.She
bewit
chedyoummeIam goi
ngtohav
eher
exposed.
”
“MamaKenei l
wei smywifeandyouwil
l r
espectthat!
Iwillnothaveanyonedisr
espectmywife.Ifanyone
can’thandleherthenl
eavebecausesheisnev er
goingany where.
”
Sheslowlyshookherhead.“Mysonwouldnever
speaktomel i
kethis.
”Sheturnedt
oKenny.“
Youdid
somethingtohim,Iknowit
.Omol oi
.(Youar
ea
wit
ch.)Iwil
lexposeyou.
”
Shewalkedouthol
dingherhandbag.Kennyl
ooked
atRona.
“
Iam goi
ngt
ocol
l
ectt
heki
dshome.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Papa.
.”
“
Daught
er,
don’
tmi
ndy
ourmot
her
.”
“
Eer
ra.
”
Kennywal
kedout
.Ronal
ookedathi
sfat
her
.
“Iam notgoi
ngtosayany
thi
ng.Thi
sisyourf
ami
l
y
andyouwi l
ll
eaditt
hewayyouseefi
t.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Letmegoandt
alkt
oyourmot
her
.”
Hewal
kedout
,At
sil
esmi
l
ed.“
Iwaswor
ri
ed.
”
Ronachuckl
ed.“
Iam goodnow.
”
At
sil
e’
sphoner
ang,
het
ooki
toutandanswer
ed.
“
Babe.
.”
“
Wher
ear
emycr
eam doughnut
s?”
“
Iam onmyway
.”
Shehungup,
Atsi
l
elookedatRona.“
Ihav
etogo.
”
“
Howi
sitgoi
ng?
”
“
Eish…”
Ronal
aughed.“
Shar
pMi
ster
.”
“
Sur
e.”
Her
ushedout
.Ronaf
rownedasNat
ewal
kedi
n.
“
Obat
lang?
”
Natecl
osedt
hedoorwi
thasmi
l
ethenst
aredat
Rona.
“
Ithi
nkweshoul
dtal
k.”
“
Otl
any
elat
lhemonna!
”
“Eket
epeleMi
ster
,youcan’
twalk.Wear egoi
ngto
haveapeacef
ulconver
sat
ion.Iam nother
etofi
ght
withyou.
”
“
WhenIgetmyhandsony
ouIam goi
ngt
oki
l
lyou!
”
“IjustsawKennyleav
ingandremember
edour
night…didyouknowsheisint
oBDSM? ”
Ronabr
eat
hedheav
il
yst
ari
ngathi
m.
“
Tobehonest
,Ihaveneverhadsuchagoodpussy
mywhol
eli
fe,
Ialwaysknewshewouldbegoodbut
fuck…Ididn’
texpecthertobethatgood.I
t’
sone
thi
ngtohav esexwithherandthenit
’sanotherto
fuckherwhilesheisti
edup,havi
ngthatpussywi t
h
nodistur
banceandt henj
ustwatchhertakedick”
“
Iam goi
ngt
oenj
oyki
l
li
ngy
ou.
”
“
LikeIenj
oyedf
ucki
ngy
ourwi
fe?
”
.
.
Don'
tfor
gett
oli
keandcomment
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#130

Ronalookedathimthensighedknowi
ngthisguy
wasprobablysayi
ngallt
hattogetonhisnerv
es.
Matt
eroff act
,hesoundedbit
teri
tact
uall
ymade
hi
ml aughashecalmeddown.
“Yousoundst upidr i
ghtnow, y ousoundsost upidI
am begi nningtowonderj usthowdumby ouar e.It’
s
l
ikey ouar edescribingt hingsy ousawf r
om amov i
e
mmehel aIam notsur prised.That ’
showdesper ate
peopl esound.Ot silegony elal ai
takaandt hat’
sa
promi se.YeahIcan’ twalknowbutassoonasIdo, I
am goi ngt ohuntyoudown, findy ouandki lly
ou.
May benkasi molakabanabagago, (MaybeIwi ll
startwithy ourki
ds, )torturet hem andki llthem while
youwat chandaf t
ert hatgot senawena. (it
’syour
turn.)Iam notbluffingandIdon’ tmakeempt y
promi ses.Youandy ourki dsar egoingtogomi ssi
ng
andi twillbeaper fectmur dernoonewi llsuspect
me.Ot lwaelathata.”
Natel
ookedathim ashespoke,therewasthi
s
col
dnessthataccompaniedhi
sv oi
cethatmadehi
m
fr
own.Helookedsorelaxedyethiswordscar
ri
edso
muchcoldness.
“Osekawal ebala,(Don’tforget,
)mybr ot
herisa
soldi
er,
hei sgoodatt heset hi
ngs.Tohimi t
’s
nothi
ng,theyar etrainedtoki l
l.Otl
il
egolelatr
ust
me.Goandst artrunni ngbecausewhenIcomeaf ter
you,Iam goingt ocomewi t
hev ery
thi
ngIhave.In
yournextli
fey ouwon’ tev
endar eandlookat
anyone’
sl i
fe.”
Natestar
edathi
m.“Al
lthi
sbecauseKennydoesn’
t
wantyouanymore?
”
“Youshoul
dcheckony ourkids.Any
thi
ngcan
happentothem.Wit
hthecasesofchi l
drengoing
missi
nggoingupli
kethis,y
oushouldbecar ef
ul.
”
“
Myki
dshav
enot
hingt
odowi
tht
his.
”
“Theyhaveeveryt
hingt
odowi t
hthi
sandnnaIam
notheart
lesstothepoi
ntofhavi
ngthem gr
owup
withoutt
heirf
athersobet
tert
heydi
ewi t
hyou.
”
Nat
etur
nedandwal
kedout
.
“
Remembertor
unreal
l
yfastt
houghyoucanr
unbut
y
oucan’
thi
de.Otl
i
legonyel
aomar et
e.”
Nat
ewentt
ohi
scardi
ali
ngt
henannywi
thhi
ski
ds.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Isev
ery
thi
ngok?
”
“
Yessi
r.
”
“
Don’
topenf
orany
one.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Iwi
l
lbef
lyi
ngi
ntoni
ght
.”
“
Yessi
r.
”
Hegoti
nhi
scarandcal
l
edhi
sfr
iend.
“
Nat
e..
”
“
Themonnat
hatcr
azyguyj
ustt
hreat
enedt
hel
i
feof
myki
ds.
”
“
Thehusbandoft
hewi
fey
ouwer
efucki
ng?
”
“
Yeah.
”
“
Heisgoingtokil
lyoummehelannaItol
dyou.That
womanisjustt
oobeauti
ful
andheisboundtofl
ip.
AndIdidmyr esear chont hi
sguy ,heisrichgapehe
hangsoutwi t
hot herr i
chbusinessmen.Thatt y
peof
guyisnotthetypey oumesswi th.Ekarehei s
fri
endsl
eboMi guel Mokwenaandmot hakaolewa
amusementpar kThosedudesar ethet y
pet okil
lfor
thei
rwives.Youdon’ tmesswiththeirfamili
es.
”
“
Kennyl
ovesme.
”
“Kennydoesn’
tloveyou.Shejustwantedt
ohav eto
sexandy ouwerethebestcandidat
e.Shetossed
youassoonasshewasdonewi thyouandsheis
backwithherhusband.”
“
Theyar
egoi
ngt
ogetdi
vor
ced.Hewon’
tfor
giv
e
t
hat
.”
“Eveni
fhedivor
cesherwhi chIdoubtbecauseshe
caneasi
lydenysleepi
ngwithyousinceyouhav eno
evi
dencetowhaty ouaresayi
ng,heisgoingtokil
l
you.Andohhhisbrotheri
sasoldier
.Awel lknown
one.Youmessedwi ththewrongpeople.
”
“
Whyar
eyoumaki
nghi
m soundal
lthat
?”
“
Becausehei
sal
lthatNat
e.Thatguyi
sgoi
ngt
oki
l
l
y
ou.”
“
Canyoutakemyki
dsatmyhouse?Iam f
lyi
ngt
her
e
t
oni
ght.
”
“
Ok.What
’sy
ourpl
an?
”
“Iam notscar
edofhi
m,ebi
l
eIam goi
ngt
owai
tfor
him.”
“
Goodl
uck.
”
“
Sur
e.”
Hehungupandst art
edthecarthendrov eoff
.He
thoughtful
lyl
ookedathisphone,hehadpr omised
himselfthathewouldn’
tcal
landwouldj ustwaitf
or
hercallbutnotanymore.Hegrabbeditandcalled
herdri
v i
ng.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Weneedt
otal
k.”
“
Soyouar
enowcall
ingmewit
hdi
ff
erentnumber
s?
Nat
hanst
ayawayf
rom me!
”
“
Iwantust
otal
k.Thatguyi
sgoi
ngt
oki
l
lyou.
”
“
MyhusbandandIar
eresol
vi
ngouri
ssues.
”
“
Kenei
l
we,
hedoesn’
tlookl
i
ket
het
ypet
ofor
giv
e.
Thinkaboutthi
s,whof orgi
vesyouaftertheyjust
wokeupf r
om acoma?Hewant syout orelax,hewi
ll
sellever
yonetheimageofy outwobei ngcrazyin
l
ov ethenkil
lsyou.Noonewi l
lsuspecthim because
everyoneisgoi
ngt obeli
evethatRonal ov
edy ouso
much.Hei sacol dheart
edmur der
er.
”
“
Ineversai
dhef orgaveme,
Isai
dwear
ewor
king
t
hroughourissues.”
“Youmeantotel
lmehedi
dn’
tfl
i
p?Kenny
,youwer
e
cheat
ingont
hisman.
”
“
Youar
ethewor
stmi
stakeIhav
eev
ermade.
”
“
Iknowy ouaretryi
ngtosav eyourmarr i
ageor
what
everthati
sl ef
tofthatshitt
ymarriagebuty ou
woul
dnothav echeatedifyouwer ehappy .Babehe
i
sgoingtokil
lyou.Heisreallysmarttoapoi nt
wher
eheconv incesyouev er
ythingi
sfinesot hat
youl
etyourguarddown. ”
“
Yousoundobsessed.
”
“
Iam t
ryi
ngt ohelpyouseewhatheispl
ayingat.No
manwil
l j
ustforgi
vecheat
ingl
iket
hatorsaywewi l
l
wor
kthroughit.Youli
edaboutgoi
ngtoMaun,then
spentthewhol eni ghtatahot elwit
hme.He
probablywaitedf orusatt hehotelti
ll
weleft.After
thatyouwoul dn’tgowi thhim whenhebeggedy ou
togowi thhimt henheget sinanaccident
.Yout hink
i
t’snormal f
orhi mt owakeupandsayokKenny ,we
wi l
lworkthi
ngst hr ough.Babethinkaboutthis.I
t’sa
trap.Thi
sguyi swayt oosmar t.
”
“Nat
hancany
oujustacceptt
hati
t’
sov
erandmov
e
onwithy
ourl
i
fe?
”
“Iam t
ryi
ngtohel
pyouherebabe.Youar
etry
ingt
o
getri
dofmeandf i
xyourmarri
agebutnonor
mal
guyisgoingt
ofor
givet
hat.Thi
nkabouti
t.
”
“Bye.Don’tevercal
lme.Osi
mol
agont
ena.(
Youar
e
start
ingtopissmeof f
.)
”
Shehungup.

*
**

Kennylockedthedoor
sasthekidsgotinsi
dethecar
thenshewalkedoverandgoti
n.ShelookedatQ
whowast
ext
ingonhi
sphone.
“
Whoar
eyout
alki
ngt
o?”
“
Noone.
”
Kennyf
rowned.“
Letmesee.
”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
It
’sacl
assgr
oup.
”
“
Thenl
etmesee.
”
“
Ngng…”
“
Qui
nton,
letmesee.
”
“
Mamai
t’
snot
hing.
”
“
Letmesee.
”
“
That
’si
nvadi
ngmypr
ivacy
.”
“Whatdoy
ouknowaboutpr
ivacyQui
nton?Letme
see.
”
“Hehasagirl
fr
iendmama,
Ihear
dhi
m sayIl
ovey
ou
onthephone.
”
Qtur
nedandgl
aredatWarona.“Idi
dn’
tsayt
hat
.
Wher
edidyougett
hat?Chatt
erbox.
”
War
onaf
oldedherar
ms.“
Ihear
dyou.
”
“
Qui
nton,
letmeseey
ourphone.
”
“
MamaIa-
“
“
Giv
emey
ourphone.
”
Qhandeditov
er.Kennyl
ookedathi
smessages
t
hencli
ckedonSadi’
schat.Sher
eadthr
oughthen
l
ookedathim.
“
Who’
sSadi
?”
“
Myf
ri
end.
”
“
Whatf
ri
enddoy
out
alkaboutki
ssi
ngwi
th?
”
“
Mama…”
“
Quinton,
whatf
ri
endi
sthi
s?Youf
atherhast
osee
t
his.
”
Shestar
tedt
hecaranddroveoff
.Hisphonest
art
ed
ri
ngi
ng,shel
ookedathi
mt henanswered.
“
Q,Ij
ustspoket
omama.Shesai
dyes.
”
“
Hi,
it’
sQ’
smot
her
.”
“
Oh…dumel
ang.
”
“
Howar
eyoumygi
rl
?”
“
Iam f
ine.
”
“
Otsalay
aQuintonkanakewenangwet
siy
ame?
(
AreyouQui
nton’sf
ri
endoryouar
emydaught
eri
n-
l
aw?)
”
Sheshy
lyl
aughed.“
Iam onl
yhi
sfr
iend.
”
“I
tshoul
dremainli
kethat.Dil
otsamar at
oketsa
bagol
o.Youaresti
ll
youngt ogetpregnantandbe
ki
ckedoutofschooloryouarereadytobea
mother?
”
“
No.
”
“Thenbehav
e.Whatdoy
ouwantt
obewheny
ou
growup?”
“
Adoct
or.
”
“
Ok,
thenfocusonschoolmybaby
.Boy
swi
l
ldel
ay
y
oufr
om beingadoctor
.”
“
Eemma.
”
“
Good.By
e.”
“
Bye.
”
ShehungupasQl
ookedather
.
“Ican’tbel
iev
eyouj
ustdi
dthat
.Shei
snotev
enmy
girl
fr
iend.”
“
Soy
ouar
esay
ingIam af
ool
?”
“
MamaIdi
dn’
tsayt
hat
,Iam j
ustsay
ing-
“
“
Youwi
l
lexpl
aint
oyourf
ather
.”
Hesi
ghedandl
ookedoutt
hrought
hewi
ndow.

*
**

Miafi
nishedcl
eani
ngt
heki
tchenwi
thOr
athen
smil
ed.
“Ihaveneverbeeni
nvi
tedfordinnerwhereIhav
eto
helphim cl
eanup.Youjustl
ostapoint.
”
Orachuckl
ed.“Thatshouldbeapoi
nt,
thatIcan
washdishes.Iam sur
ey ouneedamanwhocan
hel
pyouwi ththehousechores.
”
“
Youar
esmoot
h.”
“
Wel
lthanky
ou.Youar
ebeaut
if
ul.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Thanks.
”
“
Iwantt
oki
ssy
ou.Youhav
eki
ssabl
eli
ps.
”
Het r
appedheragai nstthekitchencount ersthen
l
eanedov erandkissedher .Mi aputherhandonhi s
chestwhil
eheki ssedher .Hernippleshar denedas
hekissedhergood, hishandsgoi ngdownand
gropedherass.Shecoul df eelhi
shar ddi ckonher
stomach,curi
ouslysheputherhandi nsi dehis
sweatpantsthentouchedi t.Whatwast hatabout
shortski
nnymanagai n?Sher ubbedf eelingitgr
ow
evenharderinherhandwhi lehebreathedheav i
l
y.
Shetookitoutwhi l
et heykissedthenst rokedhim
withtheri
ghtful
gripandpr essurethathepaused
grunti
ng.
“
Fuck!
”
Miawatchedl
ookedathi
sci
rcumcisedweapon
st
roki
nghim,shel
ookedi
nhiseyesgoingf
aster
.
“
Shoul
dIst
op?
”
“
Ahhhf
uck!
”
Hebi
therl
owerl
i
pandwat
chedhi
mlosei
t
cummi
ngallov
erherdress.Shel
etgothengr
abbed
hi
sdi
shtowelt
henwipeditthenwipedher
sel
f.
“
Thanky
ouf
ort
hef
ood.Ienj
oyedi
t.
”
Oraputbackhi
sdickinhispantswet
ti
nghi
sdr
y
t
hroatwit
hsali
va.“
Pleasestay.
”
“
Youwantt
ohav
esex?
’
Heshookhi shead.“ No.Iwantust ohav eagood
ti
me.Nosexi nvolv ed.Thanky ouf orthewow…t hat
wasmi ndbl owi ngbuty oudi dnn’thav etodoi t
.I
wanty ou, Iwantt oknowy ou,Iwantt oknowy our
l
ikesanddi sli
kes, Iwantt oknowwhaty oul
ov ethe
mosti nt heent irewor ld,Iwantt oknowwhatt urns
youof fandwhatt urnsyouon, Iwantt oknowy our
fears,
Iwantt oknowy ourdr eams…Iwantt oknow
yourgoal s…Iwantt oknowwhatmakesy ouhappy .I
wantt oknowt hatonet hingy our eall
ywanttodo
beforey oudi e.Iwantt oknowwhaty ouwanti na
man, whaty ouar elookingf orinar el
ati
onship.I
wanty out oknowmet oo.Nosexi nvolv
ed.Justus
knowingeachot her .
”Heki ssedher .“
Justthat.I
don’twantsex. ”
Shetearf
ull
ylookedathi
m.“Whydoy oufeell
i
kemy
karma?Iam goingtorel
axandreal
l
yfall
inlovet
hen
nextt
hingyouknowIam crying.
”
Hel
aughed.“
Youar enev
ergoi
ngt
ocr
y.Come…what
doy
oulikewatchi
ng?”
“
Ilov
emoneyandInev
erwantt
ost
ruggl
e.”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Wear
eint
hesameboat
.”
“Good, Il
ikebeingspoi l
edandIdon’ tl i
keastingyold
fashionedboy fri
end.IwantEngl ishl ove.Iwantt o
travelthewor l
dsobad.Il ovemy self,mysi st
er,my
nephewsandni eces.Igett urnedonwhenIf eel
l
ov edandwant edandIgett urnedof fwhenIf eel
unwant ed,unappr eci
atedandbadsext urnsmeof f.
Goodsext urnsmeon.Iwantaf ai t
hf ulmanwho
l
ov esmef orme, whowi l
l showmeandt eachme
whatl oveis,notani gnorantman, Iwantamanwho
wi l
lacceptmef orme.Inar el
ationshi pIam looking
tobehappy .Tobei nlove.Ial sowantt of eel
goosebumps, Iwantt ofeel butt
er fl
iesi nmy
stomachandIwantanadv enturerssomebody .Il
ike
actionmov i
es,butIam mor eont hehor rorsi
de.”
Orasmiled.“
Ok…wel
lhav
eyouwat
chedThe
Forest
?”
“
No.
”
“
Scar
yst
uff
.Come.Let
’swat
ch.
”
Shesatdownwi
thhi
mthenhepul
l
edheri
nhi
sar
ms.
“
Btheway
,It
hinkIcanl
ayi
tdownpr
ett
ygood.
”
Shechuckl
ed.“
Good.I
magi
net
hatbeaut
if
uldi
ck
goi
ngtowaste.
”

*
**

Atthehospi
tal
,Kennywalkedinwiththeki
dswho
screamedseei
ngthei
rfatherawake.Theyrushed
overandhuggedhim.Kennysmiledastheyhugged
him.
“
Imi
ssedy
ouguy
s.”
Shesmi l
edclosingthedoorast
heyall
caughtup
chatt
ing.Ronalookedatherawhil
elat
erasshe
stoodbythedoort hensi
ghed.“
Guys…foodissol
d
her
e,canyougetmeamuf fi
n.Iam crav
ingone.
Babe,gi
vethem somemoney.Qwil
l gowitht
hem.”
Kennyt
ookoutmoneyf
rom herhandbagandgav
eQ.
“
Hur
ry.
”
“
Ok.
”
Theyal
lwal
kedout
.Ronal
ookedather
.
“
Comeher
e..
”
Kennywal
kedov
erandst
oodbef
orehi
m.
“
Comecl
oser
.”
Shegotcl
osert
hensmi
l
ed.“
Whati
sit
?”
“
Yourboy
fri
endwasher
e?”
Thesmilef
rom herf
acedi
sappear
ed,
shehad
not
icedsomethi
ngwasoff
.
“
Whatdi
dhewant
?”
“Hehadint
eresti
ngst
ufft
otel
lme.Appar
ent
lyy
ou
arei
ntoBDSM. ”
Shelookedathi
m andt
ookadeepbr
eat
htr
yingt
o
cal
m down.“He…-“
“
Didy
oul
ethi
mti
eyouupwhenhef
uckedy
ou?
”
.
.
Li
keandcommentassoonasy
our
ead
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#131

Kennyl
ookedathi
m.
“
No.Hei
str
yingt
ogett
oyou.“
“Gakerat
emakaKenei
l
we.(
Idon’
tli
kel
i
es
Kenei
lwe.
)”
“Rona,hei stry
ingtogett oy ou.Heistryingtomake
surethatwef i
ght.Hedesper ate,Il
ongbl ockedhim
buthekeepscal l
i
ngwi thdif
ferentnumber s.He
thoughty ouwoulddi vorceme, mat t
eroff act
,heis
conv i
ncedy ouaregoingt oleav emesohei sjust
try
ingbyal lmeanst or eal
lymakesur ey ouleaveme.
Hei sgoingt otr
yev er
y thi
ngint heworldtoget
betweenus.Iam sor r
yIbr oughthimi nourl i
ves.
”
Ronalookedatherandsi
ghed.“
Ifi
gur
edhewas
l
yingbut…”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
Someoneknockedont
hedoort
henasecur
it
yguar
d
wal
kedin.
“
Dumel
ang.
”
Ronasmi
l
ed.“
Sur
elai
taka.
.”
“UhIam goi
nghomeandIthoughtIwoul
dgiv
eyou
thi
s.”HehandedKennyapi
eceofpaperwi
tha
number.
“Idon’tknowify oubel i
ev einGodornotbutIgot o
churchandi t
’sagoodchur ch.Ibel
ievewi t
hGod
everythi
ngispossi ble.IjustsawallyourkidsandI
real
lywasgoi ngt omi ndmyownbusi nessbutthere
i
snowayGodwoul dbringy outwosot hatyoucan
part.Thatnumberi smypast or
’snumber .Heisa
counselor.Hecanhel py ou.Hisnamei sPastor
Pil
ane.Goodni ght.
”
Kennyl
ookedatt
henumberashewal
kedoutt
hen
tur
nedt
oRona.
“
Iam goi
ngt
ocal
lhi
m.”
“
Ok.
”
“Qisinarelat
ionshi
p.Ithi
nkit
’sseri
oustoo.You
shouldhaveat al
kwithhim.It
ookhisphoneandhe
i
stalkingaboutheli
keskissi
ngthisgir
l.
”
“
Letmesee.
”
Kennygav ehi
mt hephonethenRonathor
oughl
y
wentthroughi
t.Hesighedstar
ingathi
ssear
ch
hi
stor
y .
“
Iwi
l
ltal
ktohi
m.”
“Cany oudoitt
oday ?Iam worr
ied.Iknowi
t’
sthe
agewher eheisdiscover
ingthi
ngsbutIdon’
twant
him goingt
ojail
.”
Thekidswal
kedi
n,Kennysmi
l
edasSar
onahanded
herf
athert
hemuff
in.
“Uhh,guys,
come,l
et’
sgot
akesomet
hingf
rom t
he
car.Q,youcanr
emain.
”
Kennytookthechi
ldr
en’
shandst
henl
edt
hem
outsi
detohercar.

*
**

I
nsi
det
hehospi
tal
room,
Ronal
ookedathi
sson.
“
Jesus!Wer
eyoual
way
sthi
stal
l
?”
Ql
aughed.“
Yes.
”
“
Youlooksobig.FuckIcan’
tbeli
eveIhaveason
t
hisbi
g!Ihopeoldgir
lsdon’
ttakeadvant
ageofyou.
”
Hecr
ackedupl
aughi
nghar
der
.“No.
”
“
Yourmom i
smad.
”
“
Iknow.
”
“
Youknowshewant
swhat’
sbestfory
ou.Shewant
s
y
outobesomeonebi
goutt
here.
”
“
Yah…”
“
Yourgi
rl
fr
iendi
spr
ett
y.”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Shei
smyf
ri
end.
”
“
Youcan’
tfool
me.Shel
ookssmar
ttoo.I
sshe?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Good.Ar
eyoust
il
lav
irgi
n.”
“
Yes.
”
Ronal
aughed.“Damny ouar
egood.Hav
eyoubeen
pr
acti
cingf
orthisconv
ersat
ion?
”
Qsmi
l
ed.“
Bei
nghonestdoesn’
tneedpr
epar
ati
on
f
or.
”
“Thenwhyar ey ousear chingaboutsexwheny ou
areav irgin.LookQ, Iam notgoi ngt owast emyt ime
goingbackandf orthwi thy ou.Youar ej ust14.I
knowy ouwat cht hingsandy ouar eexposedt o
thingsbutt hisisy ourf uture.Youchoosewhaty ou
want .Doy ouwantt oendupgoi ngt oj ail
forr apeor
doy ouwantt oendupbei ngar olemodel toy our
sibli
ngs?Doy ouwantt or uinSadi’sf uturebygi v i
ng
herababyat14ory ouwantwhat ’sbestf orher .You
makeachoi ce.Sadi i
sy ourgi r
l,obv i
ousl yify ouar e
hav i
ngsex, y ouknowhowi tisandy ouar egoi ngt o
keepwant i
ngmor e.That ’
st hethingwi thsexwhen
youar et hisy oung, youar egoi ngt oal way swanti t,
i
t’saddi ctive.Sadi isnotgoi ngt oalway sagr eet ol ie
downf ory ou, nowy ouar egoi ngtost artprey ing
after10y earol ds, 11y earol ds, 12y earol ds, 13y ear
oldsorev en9y earol dsory ounger .Youwi ll
conv i
ncet hem t oopenupf ory oujustl ikey ou
conv i
ncedSadi .Iam sur eshedi dn’tjustsayokQ,
l
et ’
sgetnakedandhav esex, yousuggest edi t,you
diditandy ouconv incedhert hroughoutbecause
yourbraincant hinkmor enow.Youwi llt
urnintoa
rapi
st.That’showser iousiti
s.Chancesar ealsothat
youar egoingtogetherpr egnantandbot hofy ou
will
bedoomedf orli
fe.Howwi l
l y
ousuppor tyour
babywheny ouar ejustababyy oursel
f?Youar enot
evenwor ki
ng.Sadi goesonherper i
ods,shecanbea
mom.I maginestuckwi thyourbabywhi l
eother
chil
drencont i
nuewi thschool.
”
Qlookeddown.“Iam notshout
ingatyou.Iam j
ust
tel
l
ingyoual
laboutli
fe.Don’
tmaket hewrong
deci
sionsmyboy.”
“
Yes.
”
“
Lookatme.
”
Qr ai
sedhisheadandl ookedathi
sfather
.“Make
gooddecisions.Not
hingwr ongi
ndati
ngherbut
therei
sever y
thi
ngwrongwi thhavi
ngsexwithher
.If
youcanstayawayt i
llyouare16thatwouldbe
good.”
“
Ireal
l
yli
keher
.”
“
Iknow.Butj
ustt
woy
ear
s.Atl
eastbemat
uref
ir
st.
”
Tear
sfi
l
ledQ’
sey
es.
Ronasmiled.“
Iam nottryingtotakeawayyour
happi
ness.Iam j
ustlookingoutf ory
oumyboy .You
cankeepherasy ourfri
endwhi chyouoccasi
onall
y
ki
ssbutfri
ends.Nothingmor e.Youcanhugherher e
andther
et oo.
”
Ql
aughed.“
Ok.
”
“
Justmaki
ngsurey
oukeept hev
ult
uresawaybut
y
oualsokeepi
ngadist
ance.
”
“
Ok.
”
“Wewil
lbemonit
ori
ngyourphonef
rom t
odaygoi
ng
onwar
ds.Anddon’
tthi
nkyoucandel
eteandwe
won’
tknow.Wewill
know.”
“
Ok.
”
“
Good.
”
“
Arey
ouandmamagoi
ngt
odi
vor
ce?
”
“
Whywoul
dwedi
vor
ce?
”
“
Becausemamawascheat
ingony
ou.
”
“
Whot
oldy
out
hat
?”
“
Ihear
dit
.”
“
Whywoul
dmamacheatwhenshegotme?
”
“
Soshedi
dn’
t?”
“No.Andnoonei sdivorci
ngany one.Justli
keany
otherhumanbeings,mamaandIhav eissues
sometimes.Wecanf i
ght,
arguebutt hat’
sonly
becausewear ehuman.Wear enotgoi ngtobe
happyeveryday,yourmotherconstantlyhastoget
angrybecauseIleftmycupunwashedandIal soget
angrywhenshedoessomet hingIdon’tli
ke.Don’
t
l
istentopeopl
e.Theyhav eissues.”
Qsmi
l
ed.“
ThankGod!Iwasscar
ed!
”
“Yougotnot
hingt
obescar
edabout
…expecty
our
angrymom.”
Hesmi l
edt henKennywalkedbackinwiththeki
ds.
Theysurroundedhim agai
n,Ronalookedatheras
shestoodcl osetothedoor.
“
Whyar
eyoust
andi
ngsof
ar.Comeher
e.”
Shesmi
l
edt
henwal
kedov
erandhel
dhi
shand.
“
Thedoct
orsai
dhei
sgoi
ngt
odi
schar
gemesoon.
Hesaidweshouldhi
reanur
sewhowi l
lhel
pmeat
homeandmoni t
ormycondi
ti
on.Hesaidhehas
someonei
nmi nd.Wewil
lmeethert
omorrowinthe
morni
ng.
”
“Ok.Youdoneedsomeonewhoi
sfami
l
iarwi
thy
our
condit
iont
ohelpassi
st.
”
“
Yeah.
”
Kennylookedathimt henleanedov ertoki
sshim,
Ronaslight
lymov edthatt
heki sslandedatthe
cornerofhi
sl i
ps.Kennysmi l
edtearful
lymov i
ngher
headthenblinkedasthekidscar r
iedonchatti
ng.

*
**

Esit
ouchedherswol l
enf aceatt
heguesthousethen
putthef
rozenveggiesonherey e.Herheadwas
achi
ngsomuchi tfeltl
ikeherheadwouldspli
tin
hal
f.ShewonderedifbynowMaat l
aknewandwas
hunti
ngherdownforsl eepingwi
thhisbrot
her
.
Tear
sfi
l
ledherey
esasshet
houghtofi
t,hewoul
d
probabl
ydumpherf orgoodandleaveherwi
ththe
babyalone.Thepai
ninKenny’seyestol
dheri
t
wouldbewor sei
fMaat l
ahadtofindout
.Hewould
probabl
ycomeaf t
erthem bot
h.

*
**

Thesecondmov i
eended, OralookedatMi awho
wasal readysleepingonhi schestt hensighed.He
foundhi mselfsmi li
ngalonewhi l
est ari
ngather.He
hadnev ermetsuchar ealpersonwhonev erhid
anything.Shewast hemostst r
aightforwardperson
hehadev ermet .Ifany
onecoul dhav easkedhi m
mont hsbackaboutsuchagi rlhewoul dhav e
probablysaidno.
Heslowlypickedherupandwal
kedwit
hhertothe
bedroom.Sheopenedhereyesandl
ookedathi
m as
helaidheronthebed.
“
Hey
…youcansl
eepher
e.Iwi
l
luset
hecouch.
”
“
Iam sur
ewecanshar
ethebed.
”
Hechuckl
ed.“
Obat
lagont
shwar
a.(
Youwantt
o
t
ouchme.)”
Shelaughedsoft
lythenunzippedherdr essandt
ook
i
tofftogetherwi
thherbra.Shet ookoffherpant
ies
andremainednakedwhilehej uststar
ed.
“
Nev
erseenanakedper
son?
”
Helaughedthent
ookoffhi
st -
shi
rtandsweatpant
s
andjoi
nedhernaked.Hepul
ledhercloserand
ki
ssedher.
“
Wenaobatlagonnel
agonor
rhea.(
Youwantt
ogi
ve
megonor
rhea.
)”
Mial
aughed.“Iam cl
eangapeIdon’
twanthav esex
t
il
lwetest
.Ilovesl
eepingnaked.Cl
othessuf
focate
me.”
“
Godt
hanky
ouf
orsuchabl
essi
ng.
”
“
Youhav
en’
tany
thi
ng.Don’
tthankhi
myet
.”
“
Iwi
l
ltakeal
i
ttl
ecr
azyf
orapr
ett
yface.
”
Theybot
hlaughedki
ssi
ngandt
ouchi
ngoneanot
her
.
*
**

AtMi a’shouse,herexboyfr
iendknockedonthe
doorf oracouplemor eti
mesbeforegetti
nginhi
s
car.Hesi ghedthencall
edherbutshewasn’tpi
cki
ng.
Hisfriendlookedather.
“
Ireal
l
ythoughty
ouwer
elet
ti
ngt
hatgi
rlgoTshepo.
”
“Ireal
lyt
houghtshewould…“Heputhi
shandsonhi
s
face.“Il
oveMia,Iwi
shsheknewhowmuchIl ov
e
her.”
“
Shedoesn’
tdeser
vey
ou.
”
“Sheist
heonl
yoneIwant
.Ial
readyt
oldmyuncl
es
abouther
.”
“Shecheat
edonyou!Thi
sgi
rlpul
l
syoubackTshepo.
Youarealway
sgivi
nghermoney,
sheonl
ylov
es
whatyoudoforher
.”
“Youdon’tunder
standher.Shewentthroughal
ot
growingup.Iam goingt
of i
xmyrelat
ionshipwi
th
her.
”
Hi
sfr
iendshookhi
sheadgi
vi
ngup.
*
**

Thef ol
l
owingmorningKennywalkedi
nsi
deRona’
s
room atthehospi
talt
hensmiledst
ari
ngathi
s
doctorwhowaschat t
ingwit
hhim.
“
Mrs.Mot
samai
…”
“
Doct
or.
.”
Thedooropenedandawomanwal kedi
n.Kenny
l
ookedattheyoungl
adywalki
ngin.Kennylookedat
herdr
essandheelst
henherstr
aightweave.She
wasyoungandbeauti
ful
.Thedoctorsmil
ed.
“Right ,thisisAsalepel eMicheals,sheisthenur seI
wast alkingabout ,shei sanurseaswel l
asa
phy siother api
st.Shecameher elooki
ngf orajob,
unfor tunat el
yshedi dn’tgetthejobbutIsawher
resume, sheisfami l
iarwithyourcaseandIt hink
afterIdi schargey ou, Iwouldfeel muchbet t
er
l
eav ingy ouinherhands.Asal epele,t
hisisMr .and
Mr s.Mot samai.”
Asasmi l
ed.“Mor ning,pleasuremeet ingbothofy ou.
Mynamei sAsalepeleMi cheals,Ididmynur si
ngand
physiot
herapyi
nUKandwaswor ki
ngt hereforthree
yearsti
llamonthbackwhenIdeci dedt ocomeback
home.Iwasl at
ef ortheint er
viewt hat’swhyIdidn’t
getthejobbuttrustme, Iam goodatwhatIdo. ”She
handedKennyherr esume.“ Dr.Mat habeletoldme
aboutyourcasey est er
dayandIam mor ethan
happytobeaty ourassi st ance,Ipromi setogety ou
backinshapeinnot ime. ”
Kennylookedatherasshespokewit
hanaccent
thent
urnedtoRonawhowassmi l
i
ng.
“Well
,i
fthedoct
orr
ecommendsy
out
heny
ouar
e
hi
red.
”
“
Youwi
l
lnotr
egr
eti
tMr
.Mot
samai
.”
“Asa,comel
etmebr
iefy
ouonhi
scasesoy
oucan
studyit
.”
Shewal
kedoutwi
tht
hedoct
or.Kennyl
ookedathi
m.
“Idon’
tli
keher
.It
hinkweshoul
dhi
readi
ff
erent
person.
”
“
Why
?”
“
Ijustdon’
tfeel
comf
ort
abl
ewi
thher
.”
“That
’snotar
easontodisli
keher.Shei
sgoingt
o
helpmeandit’
sanadvantagethatshei
salsoan
physi
other
api
st.
”
“
Ithoughtwewoul
dhi
reamal
ephy
siot
her
api
st.
”
“Let
’sseeherandhowshedoesf i
rst
.Wewillgi
ve
hertwoweeksandi fsheisnotgood,wewil
lgeta
malephysiot
herapi
st.Dr
.Mothibel
aisver
ypositi
ve
abouther.Gi
veherachance.”
Kennylookedathim sadl
yknowi
ngshepr
obabl
yhad
tori
ghttodisput
e.“Ok..
”
“
Didy
out
alkt
othepast
or?
”
“
Yes.Wewi
l
lst
arti
naweek’
sti
me.
”
“
Ok.Good.
”
AWEEKLATER
.
Goodni
ght
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#132

AWeekLat
er.
..

Kennyl
ookedatt
hel
andscapear
chi
tectseat
edi
n
herof
fi
ce.
“Iwanttomaket hegardenev enmorebigger
,I
boughttheplotnexttoit.Iwantt
hatpondbigger
andIwantnewt hings.Iwantnewt hi
ngsthatatt
ract
mor epeopl
e.Theyalreadyknowwhatwear e
offer
ing,
Iwantsomet hingtowowt hem.”
“
Ok,
Iwentthr
oughy ouri
deasandt
heyar
epossi
ble.
Wej
ustneedproperpl
anning.
”
“Iknowthat’
swhyIcametoyou.Iwantsomet
hing
extraor
dinar
y.Somet
hingbr
eathtaki
ng.
”
“
Ok,
Iwi
l
lputt
oget
hery
ouri
deast
henpr
esent
.”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Hest
oodupandwal
kedoutbumpi
ngi
ntoMi
a.
“
Hey
..
”
“
Hi…”
“
Iwantt
orunsomet
hingwi
thy
ou.
”
“
Let
’sdoittomorrow.Iam goinghomet ot
akeRona.
Wearegoingforourfi
rstcounsel
ingsessi
on.
”
“
Ok,
tomor
rowmor
ningt
hen.
”
“
Thanks.
”
Kennystoodupandwalkedoutwi
thherbag.She
gotinthecardi
ali
nghi
m buthedi
dn’
tpick.She
star
tedthecaranddr
oveoff.

*
**

Tshenol
oopenedthedooratherhouseandsmi
l
ed
st
aringatPuso.
“
Hey
…Ihav
ebeencal
l
ing.
”
“
Iwassobusy
.”
Pusonoddedwi
thasmi
l
e.“
Youdon’
thav
etol
i
e.
What
’sup?
”
Tshenol
olookedathi
m.“
Not
hingIj
ust
…”
“
What
?”
“
Scar
ed.
”
“
Comeher
e,ar
eyouki
dsi
n?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Ok,
just10mi
nut
es.
”
Hetookherbacktohishousethent
heybothsat
down.Pusotookherhandsint
ohisthensmil
ed.
“
Whatar
eyouscar
edof
?”
“
Ofmov
ingon.
”
“
Why
?”
“
Iam scar
edIwon’
tlov
eyout
hewayy
ouneedt
obe
l
oved.
”
“
Howwi
l
lyouknowi
fyouhav
enev
ert
ri
ed?
”
“
Idon’
twantt
ohur
tyou.
”
“
Youwil
lneverknowti
lly
out aket
heri
sk.Andnot
t
hatIam t
ryi
ngtodraganyone,Ir
eadabouty
our
ex’scase,heisinfory ears,
20y earsisalongt i
me.
Willyousurvi
vethat?Hei spr obablytheonlyman
youhav eeverlovedandt rustme, Iknowy oumi ght
feell
ikeyouarebet rayi
nghi m butatsomepoi nty ou
havet omoveon.Fi nei fi
t’
snotwi thmebuty ouwi l
l
havet opi
ckupt hepi ecesandkeepmov ing.”
Shepr
essedherl
i
pst
oget
herst
ari
ngathi
mtear
ful
l
y.
Hesmil
ed.“
ButIam gl
adwehadthi
stal
k.NowI
won’
tbot
heryoumakingy
ouuncomfor
tabl
e.And
youar
eabadliar
.By
e.”
Shenoddedthenstoodupandwal
kedout
.Shegot
backinherhousewit
hasigh,
somehowshefel
tso
sad.

*
**

Esil
ookedatherfaceinsi
deherhouseandsighed.
Shelookedfarmuchbetternow.Shesatinfr
ontof
themirr
oranddidhermake- up.Whenshewasdone,
sheputonhernewdr essthenwalkedoutofthe
houseandgoti
nhercar
.Shedr
oveof
fcal
l
ing
Maatl
a.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,Iam onmyway
.”
“
Her
e?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Bye.
”
Shehungupandsmi led.Mi
nutesl
atersheparked
hercart
hensteppedoutandwalkedinsi
dethe
housewhereshefoundMaatlawatchi
ngaf ootbal
l
gamewithhissons.Kagotur
nedtohismotherand
smil
ed.
“
Hol
yChr
ist
!”
Shesmil
edi
nhershor
tdr
ess.“
Ithoughty
out
wo
wentt
oKasane.
”
Kagosmi
l
ed.“
Tomor
row.Wow!Mom…damn!
”
Esismil
ed.“
Stopthat
.Youcamejusty
ester
dayand
al
readyyouarebehavi
ngl
ikeawhit
echil
d.”
Let
habolaughed.“
Hei
sfor
get
ti
ngt
hatt
hisi
s
Afr
ica.
”
“I
t’
snotawhi tethi
ngtocomplimentyourmother
whenshei slooki
ngbeauti
ful
li
kethisyouuncult
ured
swine.Youlookbeaut
iful
mama. ”
Esi
blushed.“
Thanks.
”
Maat
lal
ookedather
.“Theycango.
”
Let
habof
rowned.“
Gowher
e?”
“Toy
ouruncl
e’
shouse.Iam sur
eAt
sil
eneeds
company
.”
Theboy
slaughedthengr
abbedthei
rfat
her
’scar
key
sandwalkedout.Maat
lal
ookedather.
“Youdi
dn’
ttel
lmet
heki
dswer
egone.Whati
fI
camenaked?”
Maat
laputhi
shandsonherwai
standki
ssedher
.
“
Youmi
sunder
stoodt
hedat
es.Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Thanks.Am If
at?
”
Helookedatherandsmil
ed.“Youar
ethi
ckandI
l
oveit.Whosaidyouar
efat?”
“Kenny
,sheact
ual
l
ysai
dIshoul
dhi
ssmywayt
othe
gym.”
“
Thatwomanthi
nkstheworldrev
olvesar
oundher,
t
othi
nkatsomepointIact
uall
yli
kedherforRona.
”
“
IsRonat
aki
ngherback?
”
“
Hesay st
heyaregoingforcounseli
ng.I
t’sa
mist
ake,t
hatwomanwi ll
nev err
especthim.Next
t
imeshewi l
lbever
ycarefulhewon’tcatchher.That
marr
iageshoul
djustend,therei
snothi
ngl ef
tthere.
”
“
May beheisr
eal
l
ygoi
ngt
ofor
giv
eherbecausehe
l
ovesher.
”
“Shespenttheenti
renightwiththatmanhav i
ngsex
withhim,evenhadthegut stohav eRonachaseaf t
er
them,whatwouldhavehappenedhadshenotget
caught?Shewouldhavej ustcontinued,sheisonl
y
sorrybecauseshegotcaught ,
ifshedi dn’
tget
caught,shewouldhavejustcontinued.”
“
Yah…”
“Don’
tli
stent
ohert
ryt
opul
lyoudown.Youar
e
beaut
if
ul.”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Thanks.
”
Heki
ssedherunzi
ppi
ngt
hedr
ess.

*
**

Kennypar
kedhercart
hensteppedoutandwal
ked
i
nsi
dethehouse.Shel
ookedattheki
ds.
“
Higuy
s!”
“
Himama…”
Shehuggedt
hem t
henf
rowned.“
Wher
eisQ?
”
“
Doi
nghi
shomewor
kinhi
sroom.
”
“
Ok.Daddy
?”
“
Doi
ngexer
ciseswi
thAunt
yAsa.
”
“
Ok.
”
Kennywal
kedtoQ’sroom t
henwal
kedi
nandf
ound
hi
m wit
hhisbooks.
“
Hey
..
”
“
Isweary
ouopent
hedoorl
i
keasol
dier
.”
“Thi
sismyhouseandIwi
ll
openmydoor
sthewayI
choose,
howwasschool
?”
“
Itwasok.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shewenttotheroom t
heywer enowusi
ng
downst
air
sthenlookedatAsamassagingRona’
s
l
egsinherunif
orm.Asasmiled.
“
Mrs.Mot
samai
.”
“
Hi.CanIhav
eamomentwi
thmyhusband.
”
“
Ok.
”
ShewalkedoutasRonal
ookedather
.Shel
ookedat
hi
soil
ylegs.
“
Shei
snowamassaget
her
api
stt
oo?
”
“
Yeah,
shei
sact
ual
l
ygood.
”
“
Ok,wel
lyoushoul
ddr
ess.Wear
egoi
ngf
or
t
her
apy.
”
“
Fucki
t’
stoday
?”
“
Yes.
”
Shet ookthet owel
ont hefloorandwi pedhislegs.
Shet ookhissweatpant sthenhel pedhim dress
beforehelpinghimt othewheel chai
r.Shepushed
hi
mt othecar .Awhilelatershedr ov
eof fthen
l
ookedathi m ashepr essedhisphone.Tear sfi
l
led
herey esbutsheblinkedt hem awaygoi ngt othe
churchoffices.

*
**

Atchurch,
KennypushedRonai
nsi
dethepast
or’
s
of
ficewhoimmediatel
ysmil
edast
heywalkedi
n.
“
Ohl
ovel
y!
”
Kennysmi
l
edshaki
nghandswi
thhi
m.
“
Hel
l
o…”
“
Daught
er…”
Heshookhandswi
thRona.“
Son…”
Kennysatdown.
“
Howar
eyout
oday
?”
Ronasmi
l
ed.“
Iam good.
”
Thepast
orl
ookedatKenny
.“Iam f
ine.
”
“Wonder f
ul.Iam Past
orPil
ane.”Hesmi l
ed.“Ihave
beenapast orsincemyearlyt
hirti
esandIstarted
doingthiscouplether
apythi
ngt enyearsback.I
havefourkids.Ihavebeenmar ri
edtomyl ovelywif
e
for30y ear
s.Son, y
oucanintr
oducey oursel
f.
Ronasi ghed.“
Iam AronaMotsamai.Ir
unaReal
Estatecompany .Ihav
efourki
dstoo.Ihav
ebeen
mar r
iedtomywi f
eherefor7year
sbutIhaveknown
herforlonger.
”
“MynameisKenei
lweMotsamai.Ir
unKenny’
sEvent
andTrav
elmanagement
.Ihavefourki
dsandhav
e
beenmarri
edt
omyhusbandf or7year
s.”
PastorPilanesmiled.“Ni
cemeet i
ngy out wo.I
bel
ievey outwocomi ngheremeanst hereis
somet hi
ngwr ong.NowIwanty outobewel l
awar e
ofsomet hing,
ifyouwantt ofi
xwhat everproblems
youhav ethenyouhav et
obehonestwi t
hone
anotherasmuchasy ouarehonestwi t
hy oursel
f.I
f
youcomehereandkeeplyi
ngtheny ouar
emaking
thi
ngswor
seforyour
selfbecausewearenever
goingt
oachi
eveanyt
hing.Iwouldl
iketopray
.Hol
d
hands.
”
Theyhel
dhandst
henhest
art
edpr
ayi
ng.
“Father
,IhaveAronaandKenei l
wei nthisof f
ice
today.Iwoul
dl i
ketoputy ouinthesesessi onswe
aregoingtohave,leadusandbewi thus.Ifit’
s
meantt obe,l
etitbeLord.Givey ourchi
ldrent he
heartstofor
giveandtrulyfor
give.Givethem the
wisdom toli
stenandt oconquer.Givemet he
strengt
htoguidethem.Int henameofJesusIpr ay
,
Amen. ”
“
Amen…”
“Good.Kenei
lwebriefedmeonwhatt heproblem
was.Shesaidit
’sdishonest
y,cheat
ingandothers.I
thi
nkthi
sagoodt imet otel
lmewhatt heproblem i
s.
Kenny,youcanstar
t .
”
“
Ronawasdist
antal
lofasudden.Hei
ssomeone
whobreat
hesi
nsexbutal
lofasudden,
hewas
wi
thdr
awn.Hesai
ditwasworkbutnomatt
erhow
stressful wor kcanbe, i
tnev erget st oapoi ntwher eI
hav etof orcehi mt osleepwi thme.Hewasnow
goingt woort hr
eeweekswi thoutt ouchingme.Thi s
i
st hesamemanwhousual l
ycan’ tgot woday s
withoutwant i
ngsex .Itriedev erythi ngbuti twasn’t
wor king.Ont hedayofmybusi nessl aunch, he
missedi t
, saidhewashel dupi nKasanei na
meet i
ng.Iwentt herethatsameni ghtandt her ewas
noonebutt herehadbeenawomani nside.He
deniedi t,hecanl i
e.Hei sgoodatt hatbutIknow
him now.Icoul dsmel lper f
ume, Isawag- stri
ngand
ahai rband.Thef l
oorwaswetasi fsomebodyhad
ranoutwet .Hesai dhewasal onet henaf terthat,a
dayl aterhef i
nall
yexpl ainedsay i
nghehadchecked
outt hencameback, f
oundhi sr oom occupi ed.The
l
adywhohadoccupi edt heroom gav eittohi m
becauseshewasn’ tgoi ngt ouse.Thatwashi s
explanat i
on.Idi dn’tdisput etoitbuti tdidn’tmake
sense.I tdi dn’tmakesenset oget herwi thot her
storiesheusual lytel
ls.It hendeci dedi fhewas
goingt okeepcheat i
ngt henImi ghtaswel ltoosoI
cheat edwi thhim withthi sotherman.I twast hefi
rst
ti
met ocheatonRona, Ihav enev ercheat edonhi m
bef
ore.That
’swhatl
edt
ohi
sacci
dent
.”
Thepast
orl
ookedatRona.“
Ist
hatt
rue?
”
“
Yes.
”
“Wereyoucheat
ing?Remember ,
youcomi ngher
e
meansy ouarer
eadyt ofi
xyourmar ri
age,i
tmeans
youloveyourwi
feandy ouar ewill
ingtoworkthi
ngs
thr
ough.Nomarriageisperfect.Eventheonesyou
seeonTV, t
heyarenotperfect.Evenmi neasa
pastor
…it’
snotperfect
.Behonest .
”
Ronal
ookedatKenny
.“Yes.
”
Tearsfi
l
ledKenny
’seyes,
itwashi
sadmissi
ont
hat
j
ustbrokeher
.Shebli
nkedacoupl
eofti
mesbut
tear
sroll
eddownhercheeks.
“Ok.Wasthatt
heonl
yti
mey
oucheat
edsi
ncey
ou
gotmarr
ied.
”
“
Yes.
”
Kennylookedathi
m.“
Didy
ousl
eepwi
thKayt
hat
day?”
“No.Youjustcaughtmeinacompromisi
ngposi
ti
on.
Sheundressedbecauseshet
houghtIwouldwant
herandIdidn’
t.Youdroveint
hatmomentandI
pani
cked.Itr
iedtoexplai
nbutyouwer
etooangr
y.”
“
Whowasi
t?AtKasane…whowasi
t?”
“Justar
andom woman.That’
snotwhyImissedthe
l
aunch.Ir
eall
ygotcaughtupIswear
.Iwasgoingto
come.”
Herl
i
pst
rembl
ed.“
WhataboutEsi
?”
“Wewer edrunk.Iwasst r
essedaboutQ, hewasn’ t
feeli
ngwellandyouwoul dn’
tleteseey ou.The
companywasn’ tdoingsowel l.Iam notgoingto
excusemybehav iorbutIregrettedi
tandpr omi sed
my selft
hati
twouldnev erhappenagai nandi tnever
did.”
“But
…y ou…”Sheputherhandonhercheekst
ryi
ng
nottocry.
“
Iam sor
ry.Thatwasthebi
ggestmi
stakeIhav
eev
er
madeinmyent i
rel
if
e.”
“
Itcoul
dhavebeenanyone…nother.Shewasmore
t
hanjustafr
iend…shewasmor ethanthat
.Shewas
l
i
kemysi st
er.Il
ovedheryouknewthat.
”
Ronal ookedatherasshefinal
lybrokedowncr y
ing
putti
ngherhandsonherf ace.Hesi ghedsadl
y
watchinghercrybecauseofthepai nhehadcaused
her.Thepastorhandedaboxoft issues.She
reachedf ort
hem minut
eslaterandwi pedher
hersel
f .
“Iwantt ot ellyout wosomet hi
ng.Todaybot hofy ou
haveanopt ion.Tost ayandmakei twor k.Itwon’ t
happeni noneday ,itwillt
aket i
me, i
twi lltakeef fort
,
i
twilltakef orgivenesst omakei twor k.Ory oucan
chooset owal kaway ,somet i
mest hepai nist oo
much, thedamagei st oomuchandt herei snot hing
l
eftbutj usthur t
…y oucanwal kawayf r
om i t.You
canchooset ostartov erwi t
hsomeoneel seandgo
onwi t
hy ourl if
e,ify ouar egoingtohel lfort hat,ok,
youwi l
l probabl ymeetmostpeopl ether e.It’supt o
you,tost ayandmakei tworkort oleav eandj ust
mov eon.What ’
sy ourchoi ce?”
.
.
Don'
tfor
gett
oli
keandcomment
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#133

Ont heirwayhome, Kennydroveinsi

lencewhi le
Ronasatbesi deher.Herheartwassoheav yshej ust
want edtopulloverandleti
toutbutshehel dt he
steeringwheelmor eti
ghtl
yholdi
ngitin.Sher oll
ed
downt hewi
ndowbl inki
ngawayhertear sthen
l
istenedt ot
hesongont heradi
o.Shechuckl edas
LewisCapaldi f
il
ledthecar.

I
’
m wai
ti
ngup,
sav
ingal
lmypr
eci
oust
ime
Losi
ngl
i
ght
,I’
m mi
ssi
ngmysameol
dus
Bef
orewel
ear
nedourt
rut
htool
ate
Resi
gnedt
ofat
e,f
adi
ngaway

Sot
ell
me,
cany
out
urnar
ound?
Ineedsomeonet
otearmedown
Oh,
tel
lme,
cany
out
urnar
ound?
Butei
therway

Hol
dmewhi
l
eyouwai
t
Iwi
shthatIwasgoodenough(
hol
dmewhi
l
eyou
wai
t)
I
fonl
yIcoul
dyouwakeup(
hol
dmewhi
l
eyouwai
t)
Myl
ove,
myl
ove,
myl
ove,
myl
ove
Won’
tyoust
ayawhi
l
e?(
hol
dmewhi
l
eyouwai
t)

Tel
lmemor
e,t
ell
mesomet
hingIdon’
tknow
Di
dwecomecl
oset
ohav
ingi
tal
l
?
I
fyou’
regonnawast
emyt
ime
Let
’swast
eitr
ight

Atearr
olleddowncheekthenshewipeditwi
tht
he
backofherhandswit
chingofther
adio.Shet
ooka
deepbreath.
“
Babe,
stopt
hecar
.”
Shetur
nedtoRona.“
Weneedt
ogethome.Theki
ds
areal
one.
”
“
Qiswi
tht
hem.
”
“
Ineedt
opr
epar
eformy
-“
“
Pleasepul
lov
er.
”
Sheswallowedthenparkedthecaronthesi
deoft
he
road.Shelookedathi
m astearsbl
uredherv
isi
on.
Shebitherlowerl
ip.
“
Ist
her
esomet
hingwr
ongwi
thme?Doy
oul
ove
me?
”
“
Ilov
eyousomuch.
”
Kennyshookherheadastear
sr ol
l
eddownher
cheeks.“That
’snothowy
outreatpeopl
eyoul
ove.I
am hurti
ng.”
“
Iknowt
hat
’swhyIwantt
owor
koni
t.
”
“It
houghtget
ti
ngmarri
edwoul
dsetthi
ngsri
ght…
whatdidther
andom womanhavet
hatIwasn’
t
giv
ingyou?Maybei
fyoutol
dmeIwould…Iwouldtr
y
byallmeanst
omakesur
etogiveyouev
ery
thingy
ou
need.Maybewear
ewast
ingourti
meRona.”
“
Idon’
twanttoloseyou.Il
oveyou,
Iknowi
t’shar
d
t
obeli
evebutIdobabe.Idon’
twanttowal
kaway.”
Kennyputherhandsonherfacecr
ying.Ronapul
l
ed
heronhisl
apandheldherinhisar
ms.
“Iam sor
ryforal
lthehur
t,Iwi
shIcanmakeitgo
away,IwishIknewhowt omakeitgoaway
.”
Shelookedoutsi
det
henturnedtohim.“
Ican’
tdo
thi
sanymore.Thepai
noflovingyouist
oomuchfor
me.”
Kennycr
iedthenf
inall
ykeptqui
etbr
eat
hingheav
il
y
fi
ghti
ngwit
hherhiccups.
“Idon’
tli
keAsalepele.Ifeelthi
sisgoingt
obey et
anotherci
rcl
ewher ey ousleepwithherorsomethi
ng.
Iam notgoingtohandl ethat.I
’
dratherdi
ealone
thandealwithaserialcheater.
”
Ronaki
ssedherf
oreheadmassagi
ngherscal
p.“
Ok.
Wewill
getsomeoneelse.
”
Theysati
nsi
l
encel
i
steni
ngt
oeachbr
eat
hewhi
l
e
thecoldbreezef
il
ledthecar.Kennycl
osedherey
es
exhaustedandsl
owl yfel
lasl
eep.
“
Babe?Or
obet
si?(
Arey
ousl
eepi
ng?
)”
Therewassi
l
ence.Her
eachedf
orhi
sphoneand
text
edQ.
Rona:
Hey,mamaandIwi l
lbear
ri
vi
ngabitl
ate.
Don’
topenforany
one.Makesur
etheki
dsgot o
sl
eeponti
me.
Q:
Ok.
Hesi ghedthenlookedathi swal l
paper.I
twashis
fami l
yandtheywer eallsmili
ngatt hepict
ure.The
talkhisuncl
ehadgi venhi my earsbackbeforehe
claimedKennyashi swi ferangi nhi
shead.Hehad
saidatsomepoi ntshewoul dstopcryi
ngf orhi
m,
shewoul dstopcar i
ngandshewoul djustwalkaway
withoutasecondt hought.Tear sfi
ll
edhiseyesashe
thoughtofallt
het earsshehadshedi nhisname
andwonder edjusthowmuchmor eshecouldhandle.
Herubbedhiseyesashef ort
hefi
rstt
imeev er
pray
edforhismarri
age.Hecouldf
eelhimselfl
osi
ng
her,
itwasthatdoubthesawinhereyestheseday
s.
Theconst
antsni
ff
inghewouldhearlat
eatni
ghtand
j
ustknowi
nghewast hecauseofital
lhur
thi
m more.
Shehadn’
tbeensl
eepingt
hispastweek.
Hewentthroughtheirpi
cturesandsmi l
edatthe
happysmil
es.Thelastti
met heyhadbeenreal
ly
happywasont hei
rlastvacationtr
ipt
oMaldives.
Helaidbackholdi
nghisphonethi
nki
ngofwhathe
coul
dpossibl
ydof orhert
ojustappr
eciateher,i
t
hadbeenawhi l
esincehelastdi
danythingnicefor
her,
letal
onejustshowherhowmuchhel ovedher.

*
**

Miaf i
nishedprepar
ingherdinnert
hentookherplat
e
tothesi t
ti
ngroom wheresheputherfeetonthe
tabl
eandwat chedTVrelaxi
ng.Herphonerang,
she
smiledpickingOra’
scall
.
“
Hey
…”
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ng?
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Iam wat
chi
ngTV.
”
“ShouldIcomeov ersowewat
cht
oget
her
?Kea
borega.(Iam bor
ed.)
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Cool
,shoul
dIbr
ingy
ouany
thi
ng?
”
“
NoIam f
ine.
”
“
Keet
la.
”
Hehungup,sheputherphonedownwi thasmil
e
thenfr
ownedatt
heknockonherdoor .Sheputher
plat
edownthenwalkedoverandopened.
“
Hey
..
”
“
Tshepo…”
“
Canwet
alk?
”
“Uhyes.
”Shewal
kedoutsi
declosi
ngt
hedoor
behi
ndher.Hel
ookedatherdoor.
“
Ist
her
eany
onei
nsi
de?
”
“
No.Iam al
one.
”
Henodded.“
Iwantust
ofi
xthi
ngs.
”
“
Buty
ousai
d…-
“
“
Iknow.Iwashur
tbutIl
ovey
ou.Iwantust
owor
k
t
hingsout
.”
“
Tshepo…”
“Il
ovey ousomuchandIhav elovedy oufory ears.I
am notwi l
l
ingtojustgivethatupt ojustcheat i
ng.I
understandwhyy oudiditandIl ookedintoit.Iam
sofocusedonbusi ness,Ishowery ouwi thmoney
i
nsteadofphy si
calattenti
on.Iam sor ry
,Ijustwish
youhadt oldmeear l
iergorekeipakany e(soIcanf i
x
myself)butit
’sok.NowIknowwhatt odo.”
Miasighed.“Younev ergav emeat t
ent ionatall
.Ifel
t
l
onelymostoft het i
mebecausey ouwoul dcomet o
myhouset henst aybusyony ourl aptop.Wenev er
evendidcutethingst ogether.Itstartedwheny ou
gotyourbigbreakandt ookov ery ourf ather’
s
companywhi chwasgr eatbutast imewentony ou
j
ustdisconnected.Somewher eal ongt helineIj
ust
fel
loutoflovewi t
hy oubecausenowy ouf el
tmor e
l
ikeasugardaddyt hanmyboy fr
iend.Youwoul d
assumeIam cal l
ingf ormoneysol ennaIendedup
j
ustcall
ingformoney .Idon’tthinky ouandIwi ll
workbecauseIdon’ tlovey ouany mor e.Thel ov
egot
l
ost
.”
Hecl
osedhi
sey
es.“
Wecant
ryt
o-“
“Wecoul dt
rytof
ixthi
ngsift
hel
ovewasst i
llt
here
butifIsayIl
oveyouri
ghtnowIwouldbejustly
ing
toyouandmy sel
fandnnaIdon’
tli
kepret
ending.”
“
Comeonbabe…”
Shesighed.“Iam sorrymmehel athepastweeks
haveshownmet hati
ndeedourlovelongended.I
real
l
yhopey ouf i
ndt hatgi
rly
ousaidy ouwouldfi
nd,
hopeful
lythi
st i
mey ouactuall
yputherfir
st.
Goodnight.
”
Shewal
kedbackinsi
deherhouseandcl
osedt
he
door
.Mi
nutesl
aterhedrov
eoff.

*
**

Tshenol
ostoodbyhersitt
ingroom wi
ndowstari
ng
atthecart
hathadbeenpar kedi
nPuso’syar
dfor
al
mostt wohoursnow.Shehadseentheladystep
outandwalkin.Shet
hinki
ngofwhathewas
possi
blydoi
ngwi
thher
.Sheclosedhereyes
wonderi
ngwhyshewasfeel
ingjeal
ous,
shehad
beentheonewhodeci
dedtoghosthim.
Sheclosedhereyesasherl
i
ttl
ehear
tbr
oke.Andr
ea
walkedinandfr
owned.
“
Mamawhyar
eyoust
andi
ngt
her
e?”
Tshenol
olaughed.“Huh?UhhIthoughtIhear
d
someoneoutside.Whatareyoudoingawake?”
“
Iwantwat
er.
”
“
Ok.
”
Andreawalkedtothekit
chenanddr ankwat erthen
wentbacktobed.Tshenolotookherempt ymugand
walkedtohishouse.Shecouldhearlaughterallthe
wayf r
om t
hedoor .Sheknocked,
secondsl aterthe
dooropenedandawomanl ookedather .
“
Hi…”
“
Hi,
uhhcanIseePuso.
?”
“
Uhok.P,
someonei
sher
etoseey
ou.
”
Pusowal
kedf
rom t
hebedr
oomssmi
l
ingt
hen
pausedst
ari
ngatTshenol
o.
“
Hey
?”
Tshenol
olookedatt
hewomanasshest
aredather
.
“Canwetalk?
”
“
Yah,
Bont
le,
thi
sismynei
ghbor
,Tshenol
o.”
Bont
lesmi
l
ed.“
Nicemeet
ingy
ou.
”
Tshenol
onoddedthenshegotbacki
nsi
det
hehouse.
Pusostar
edathermug.
“
What
’sup?
”
“
Ist
haty
ourgi
rl
fr
iend?
”
“No.Sheusedtobemydaught
er’
steacher
,Il
i
ked
herthensoIbumpedi
ntohert
oday.
”
“
Andal
readyy
ouar
ehav
ingdi
nnerwi
thher
?”
“Sheisni
ce.Gapeomontl
e.(
Andshei
sbeaut
if
ul.
)
Didyouwantsomethi
ng?
”
“
Soy
ouwanther
?”
Henoddedwi
thasmil
e.“Yeah.Sheissingl
eand
r
eadytobei
narel
ati
onship.Idon’
thavetoquest
ion
any
thi
ngwi
thher
.”
Tshenol
onodded.“
Ok.
”
“
Whatdi
dyouwant
?”
Sheshookherheadthent
urnedt
ogot
oherhouse
butshetur
nedback.
“
You…”Sheshookherhead.“
Goodni
ght
.”
“
Goodni
ght
.”
Shewentbackt
oherhouse.

*
**

Thef oll
owingmorni
ng,Kennyputonhersunglasses
steppingoutofhercarhi
dingherswol
leneyes.She
wentst rai
ghtt
oheroffi
ceandtookoffher
sunglassesasherphonerang.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Ithi
nkIl
ostPuso.
”
“
What
?How?
”
“
I…Kgosi
-“
“
Ishebei
ngr
eleased?
”
“
No.
”
“
So?
”
“
I…Hesai
dhemi
ssesmeandwant
stof
uckme.
”
“
From wher
e?Pr
isonbar
s?”
“
Hewoul
dmakeapl
an.
”
“Ar
ey ouser
ious?Soyouaregoingtol
oseagood
guyli
kePusof orwhat
?20mi nut
essexbecauseI
am surehehast omakei
tfastandgoback.
”
“
Ireal
l
yli
kePusoandnowhehasagi
rl
fr
iend.
”
“Ican’
tbel
ieveyou.IthoughtIam t
heonewhomade
theworstdecisi
ons.Pusoisagoodguy, why
sacri
fi
ceachanceofhappi nessfor20minut
es
sexualpl
easure?Doesn’tPusohaveadick?I
sit
small?
”
“
Hedoeshav
eagoodsi
zedi
ck.
”
“
What’
sthepr
oblem t
hen?Cany
oust optr
ampling
y
ourownhappi
nessKgosii
sinj
ail
,youcan’tst
op
yourl
i
feforamani njai
l.Youaregoingtolosea
goodguyfornonsense.Stopbewit
chingyoursel
f!
”
“
Ok…Iguessy
ouar
eri
ghtbuthehasagi
rl
fr
iend?
”
“
Clai
myourman.
”
Tshenol
olaughed.“
Ok.Iam goi
ngt
ohi
sof
fi
ce
duri
nglunch.
”
“
That
’smygi
rl
.”
“
Howi
sitgoi
ng?
”
Kennysi ghed.“He…”Sheputherf i
ngersonherli
ps.
“I
t’
shar d.ThereisalotIdidn’
tknowt hati
scoming
toli
ght.ButIam notgoingt odiscussmymar r
iage
atwork.Idon’ twantt
ocr y
.”
“
Whatar
eyout
hinki
ng?Ar
eyouwor
kingi
tout
?”
“Idon’
tknowifi
t’
swor
thi
tany
mor
e.Lov
eal
onei
s
notenough.
”
HerPAwal
kedi
n.
“
HeyKenny
,del
i
ver
ycamei
nfory
ouj
ustnow.
”
Shegav
eherabox.Kennyl
ookedati
tcur
iousl
ythen
st
oodup.
“
Nol
o,l
etmecal
lyouback.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shel
ookedatherassi
stance.“
Whati
sit
?”
“
Idon’
tknowbuti
t’
sreal
l
yli
ght
.”
Kennyopenedt
heboxt
henl
ookedatt
hest
icky
notesi
nsi
de.
“
Itcamewi
tht
his.
”
Kennygott
hepaperandopenedi
tasherPAwal
ked
out.

‘
Heybabe, y
esterdayafterthefir
stsessi on,Ireal
i
zed
somethingasy ousleptinmyar ms.Youhadbeen
thr
oughal otallbecauseofme.Youhav eshedso
mucht earsbecauseofme.Icoul dn’teven
rememberwhenl astIjustdidsomet hingni cefor
you.Ididn’
tsleeplastnight,Iwroteallthat.It
’s300
notesintotalabouteverysinglethingIlov eabout
you.Idon’tknowi fyouwillfi
nishreadingt hem or
not.Aft
erlongt hi
nkingIjustreali
zedmay bey ou
deservebetterthanme.Youhav ebeennot hingbuta
goodwi f
eandIf ailedt oappr eciatet hat.Iwantt o
stayandf i
xt hingsbutatt hesamet imeIwanty ou
tobef reetodeci dewhaty ouwant .I
fi t
’swal king
away ,Iam readyt oacceptt hatbecauseIdon’ t
deser vey ou.Idon’ twanty ouhur ti
ngany mor e
becauseofme.Ihav edamagedy ousomucht hat
youar ealway si npai n.Idon’ tt
hinkIwi lleverlove
any oneexpecty oubutwhati slov eify ouar enot
happy ?Don’ tpi ckmeupt odaywewi llmeetat
Past orPi l
ane’ sof f
ice.Showupi fy our eall
yf eelwe
canf i
xourmar riage, Ibeli
ev ewecanbuti fyoudon’ t,
don’ tcome, Iwi llgivey out hediv orce, I
twillbe
peacef ulIswear .Iwi llwaittheref ort hetwohour s
wear esupposedt obet here.Ilov ey ouMma
Mot samai butIdon’ twantt okeepy ouknowi ngy ou
arenothappy .That ’swhypeopl eki l
lthemsel ves,I’
d
ratherl ovey ouf rom adi stancet hanl oseyout o
deat h.’

Kennyputthelet
terdownandtookoutthef
ir
st
st
ickynot
ewi t
hhisawf ul
handwri
ti
ng.
‘
Il
ovey
oursmi
l
e,i
tal
way
sbr
ight
ensupy
ourf
ace.
’
Shesmi
l
edt
ear
ful
l
ypi
cki
nganot
herone.
‘
Ilov
ehowy oucar
eformeandourkidswit
hno
complai
ntpul
l
ingt
hesupermom v
ibes.’
‘
Il
ovehowyoual
waysmaket
imef
ormeandour
ki
dsnomat
terwhat
.’
‘
Il
ovehowy
oushy
lysmi
l
ebef
orey
ousaysomet
hing
di
rt
y.’
‘
Il
ovet
haty
oul
ovemeuncondi
ti
onal
l
y.’
Shereadmoresit
ti
ngdownashepour
edhi
shear
t
outonthest
ickynot
es.

*
**

Laterthatdayatt
hepast
or’
soffi
ce,Ronalookedat
ti
met hensighedasPast
orPil
anelookedathim.
“
What’
sgoi
ngt
ohappeni
fshedoesn’
tshowup
t
oday
?”
“Iam goingtogi
veherwhatshewant
s.She
deservesthatmuchfr
om me.”
“
Butwhy
?Whycheatwheny
ouar
ehappywi
thher
?”
Hechuckl ed.“
Wouldyoubeliev
emei fItoldyou
Keneil
wei stheonl
ywomanIhav eeversleptwit
h
eversinceIgotmarri
ed?”Hesmi l
edtearful
lyputt
ing
hishandsi nhi
shead.“Ihav
enor easontolieto
you.”
Thepast
ornodded.“
Yes.Iwoul
dbel
i
evey
ou.
”
“Wellt
henIhav enev ersleptwithany oneexpecther
eversi
ncewegotmar ri
ed.ButIcanbeaman
enoughtoadmi tt
hatmay behadn’tsheshowedupI
wouldhav echeated.Admi tti
ngtocheat ingseems
muchmor eeasierthant el
li
nghert hatIwasgoingto
cheatbecauseshewoul dn’tbeli
evet hatone.I
t
wouldstraightuplooklikeal i
e.”
Helookedatt
het
ime,i
twasonlytenminut
est
il
lthe
sessi
oncametoanend.Hi
slookedatt
hepast
or
tear
ful
ly
.
“Pleasepr
ayformymar ri
age.Iam t
oomuchofa
sinner,
IdoubtGodwouldlistent
omebuthecan
l
istentoyou.Pl
easeprayformet obeabet
ter
husband.Prayformykids,formysont
onottur
nour
l
ikeme.Pl
easepr
ayformyfamil
y.Godknows
what
’si
nmyheart.Heknowsthetr
uth.Pl
easepr
ay
f
orme.”
PastorPil
anenoddedthenstoodupandwalked
roundhistabl
ethenheldRona’
sandstar
tedprayi
ng.
.
.
Li
keandcommentassoonasy oureadsowedon'
t
del
aythenextbonusf
rom comi
ng
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#134

Thepast
orf
ini
shedpr
ayi
ngt
hensi
ghed.
“
Godi
sincont
rol
son.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Tenminuteselapsed.Hesatst
il
lasmoreminutes
wentbythenitwast hi
rt
yminut
esthenhesmiled.
“
Thankyousomuchf oryourhel
pandfort
hef
act
t
hatyouevendoi
tforfree.I
tmustt
akemuchof
y
ourti
me.”
Thepast
orsmi
l
ed.“
Itdoesbutnott
hatmuch.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“YoushouldcomeonSunday
.Wehav egr
eat
servi
ceshere.May
beyouwon’tf
eel
somuchlikea
sinner
.”
“
Ok.Thanky
ou.
”
“
Youar
ewel
come.
”
Hewheel
edhimselfouttowhereLebi
tsowas
wai
ti
ngint
hecar.Lebit
sosteppedoutandhel
ped
hi
minsi
dethecar.
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“I
t’
sok.Il
osther
,it
’st
imeIacceptt
hat
.Dr
opmeof
f
athome.”
“
Ok.
”
Lebi
tsost
art
edt
hecaranddr
ovehi
mtohi
shouse.

*
**

PastorPil
anetookhisphonet hatheusedtor ecor
d
mostsessionshehadsot olistentothem whenhe
wasaloneandt r
yt ofi
ndsolutionstoprobl
ems
usuall
ypresent
edt ohi
m.Hel ookedatt hebookwi t
h
Kenny’snumberthenpressedi twit
honef i
ngeron
hi
sphoneandsav edit
.Hesenthert herecodingon
whatsapp.
PatsorPi
l
ane:
Thatwastoday
’ssessi
on.Pl
easet
ake
yourti
meandli
stent
oit
.
Hesenti
tthengotupandwal
kedt
ohi
scar
.

*
**

Ronagotinsi
dethehousethenQl
ookedbehi
ndhi
m
asLebi
tso’scardr
oveoff
.
“
Wher
eismama?
”
“
Shei
snoty
ether
e?”
“
No.
”
“
Ithi
nkshei
sst
uckatwor
k.Shei
scomi
ng.
”
“
Uhht
henur
sei
sher
e.”
Ronal
ookedatAsawhost
oodup.“
Mr.Mot
samai
,
canwetal
k?”
Ronasi
ghedt
henwentt
othebedr
oom whi
l
eshe
fol
l
owedhim.
“
Idon’
tunder
stand.Di
dIdosomet
hingwr
ong?
”
“
No.Mywi
feandIdeci
dedt
ogetsomeoneel
se.
”
“
Why
?”
“
Forper
sonal
reasons.Iam sor
ry.
”
Asal
ookedathim sadly
.“Ir
eall
yneedthi
sjob.
Pl
easeift
hereisanyt
hingImighthav
edone, t
ell
me.
I
twil
lnothappenagain.
”
“Youwerefantast
icbutwecan’
thaveyouany
mor
e.
Pleaseunder
stand.Iam r
eal
l
ysorry
.”
Shenodded.“
Ok.
”
“
Butt
hanky
ou.
”
“
Youar
ewel
come.
”
Shewal kedout.Ronalookedatthepict
urefr
ameof
hi
m andhi swifethentookiti
nhishands.Atearfel
l
onit,hebithi
slowerlipthenputitdownandwent
overtothebed.Wi thhi
supperbody ’
sstr
ength,
he
pull
edhi msel
font hebedthencalli
ngQ.Hison
walkedin.
“
Iam notfeel
ingtoowel
l.Iam goi
ngt
osl
eep.Ihav
e
aheadache.Keeptheki
dsaway .
”
“
Whatabouty
ourf
ood?
”
“
Iam nothungr
y.Justputi
taway
.Iwi
l
lseei
t
t
omorrow.”
“
Ok.
”

*
**

Tshenoloputonherlingeri
eandstaredathersel
fon
themirror
.Ithadbeent i
mesinceshedressedup
l
ikethisandletal
onef oraman.Shesprayedabitof
herperfumethenpickedhernightgownandputi ton.
Sheputonherheel sthenwalkedoutofher
bedroom tyi
nghernightgown.Thekidslookedat
her.
“
Guy
s,Iam comi
ng.Youwi
l
lremai
nwi
thaunt
y.”
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“
Iam goi
ngt
oseeaf
ri
end.
”
Shewalkedoutclosi
ngthedoorthenwalkedto
Puso’
shouse.Sheknockedont hedoor.Puso
openedshi
rt
lessthenlookedather.Shehandedhi
m
anemptymug. ”
“
Iwantmysugar
.”
Pusolookedatthemugwit
hasmil
e.“
Ok,
comei
n.
Youlooknice.Wher
earey
ougoi
ng?”
“
Onadat
ewi
thapot
ent
ial
guy
.”
Pusoopenedt hedoorwiderthenshewalkedin.She
l
ookedar oundtry
ingtoseeifther
ewasany one,she
walkedtohisbedroom checki
ngthensi
ghedwi tha
smilenotfi
ndinganyone.Pusofoll
owedherholding
hermugf ullwi
thsugar.
“
Ther
e.”
Shel
ookedathi
mt hetokhermugandputitdown.
Shebi
therl
owerli
pslowlyt
aki
ngoffhergown.
“Iam sorr
y,Iwaschi
ldi
shandIshoul dhavebehav
ed
bett
er.Iam humantooPuso, Idon’
talway
smake
thebestdecisi
onsbutIreal
l
ywanty ou.Pl
easetel
l
Bontl
ey ouchangedyourmind.”
Pusopull
edhercl
oserandki
ssedhert
ouchi
ngher.
Hepickedherupandputont
hebedgetti
ngontop
ofher.
“
Tel
lBont
ley
oudon’
twantherany
mor
efi
rst
.”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Shei
smysi
ster
.”
“
What
?”
“Yeah.Shei
smyy
oungersi
sterandshel
i
kesy
ou
alr
eady.”
Shel
aughed.“
Youar
enotf
air
.”
“
Inev
ersai
dIwas.I
tseemedherpl
anwor
ked.
”
Tshenolopulledhimf orakiss.Pusokissedherthen
tookoffherbr aandt hong.Hetookouthisdick
breathi
ngheav il
yandr anitupanddownherwetsl i
t.
Fuckshewassowetandeachmov ehemade
arousedher.Heki ssedherneckt henmov eddown
toherchestthenherbr east
.Hesqueezedhersaggy
breastski
ssingherl i
psagain.
“
Condom Puso…”
Her eachedforacondom t
henputi tonhishar
ddick.
Tshenololookedathi
m ashel ookedatherandal
l
shewant edwastoforhimtofillherupwitht
hat
dick.Heopenedherlegswiderand#r emoved.

Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#134
#r
emov
ed

Tshenolopulledhimf orakiss.Pusokissedherthen
tookoffherbr aandt hong.Hetookouthisdick
breathi
ngheav il
yandr anitupanddownherwetsl i
t.
Fuckshewassowetandeachmov ehemade
arousedher.Heki ssedherneckt henmov eddown
toherchestthenherbr east
.Hesqueezedhersaggy
breastski
ssingherl i
psagain.
“
Condom Puso…”
Her eachedforacondom thenputi tonhi shar
ddick.
Tshenololookedathim ashel ookedatherandal l
shewant edwast oforhimtof i
llherupwi tht
hat
dick.Heopenedherl egswiderandbl ockedher
pathwaysinkingdeepinherwi thagrunt.Tshenol
o
moanedsof tlyasherpussyaccommodat edhim.He
hookedherl egwithhisar
msopeni ngherupev en
mor eburyi
nghi sdi
ckdeepinsideher .Herpussy
cl
enchedar oundhim squeezinghim.
Hestar
tedmov i
ngont opofher
,thrust
ingi
nwi
th
deephardst
rokes.Tshenol
omov edbeneat
hhi
m
movingherwai
stmeet i
nghi
m alongway.I
thad
beenawhilewi
thoutsexandshewashungryfori
t
andwitheacht
hrustshewantedmore.
Pusol ookedatherasshemoanedbeneat hhim
caressinghisbicepswhi l
emov i
ngherwaistfr
om
beneath.Hehadi maginedthi
smomentsi ncethe
fi
rstti
mehesawherandf i
nall
yhavi
ngherbeneath
hi
m madehi m happy.Hegr unt
edthrust
ingint
oher.
Theirmov ement ssynched.
Shegotmor ewetterashekepthisrhy
thm thenhe
sli
doutandgotdownt hebedf l
i
ppingher.Tshenol
o
kneltandpushedherchestdownthrowingherassin
theair.
Hehel
dherwai
standpushedi
n.Tshenol
ofr
owned.
“
Shi
t…”
Shet
ri
edtorai
seherheadbuthepushedherhead
downsi
nki
ngfurt
heri
nstret
chi
nghiswayin.
“
Keepy
ourheaddown.
”
Tshenol
ocoul
dfeelevenwaymor eandshit,
hefel
t
bi
ggerthi
sway.Pusopoundedintoherbury
inghi
s
di
ckinsi
deherpussyoverandover.Herbut
tshook
wit
heachslam deepi nherpussyashef uckedher.
Tshenol
oclosedherey esmoani ngwit
hpl easur
e
whil
ehecontinuedbatteri
ngherpussy.Sheputher
handbeneathherlegsandr ubbedhercli
t.She
movedagainsthim,thepleasuredoubl
ing.
Pusowenthar derandf astergr
oaningasherpussy
clenchedhi
m ov erandov eragai
n.Hel ookedather
buttasTshenolo’smoansgotl ouder.Shescreamed
i
nt othebedspasmi ng.Pusogav eheracouplemore
thrustst
henfi
lledthecondom wi thhi
scum.
“
Ahhhhf
*ck!Shi
t!
”
.
.
.

Miarel
axedi
nOra’
sarmsast
heywat
chedaNet
Fli
x
ser
iesonherbi
gscr
een.
“Babe,what’
ssoni
ceaboutt
hisser
ies,
farIam st
il
l
confused.
”
“
Wat
ch!
”
“Ihavebeenwat
chi
ngandIf
ail
i
ngt
ounder
stand
anythi
ng.”
Miasatupri
ghtt
henst
art
edexpl
aini
ngt
ohi
m whi
l
e
heli
stened.
“
Ify
oul
i
sten-
“
Oraleanedoverandki
ssedherasshespoke.She
l
aughed.“Youarenotl
ist
eni
ngbabe,howwi l
lyou
underst
andwhat’sgoi
ngon?”
“
Iam l
i
steni
ng.
”
“Ok,soIwassay
ing,
thatguy
’sf
atheri
stheki
ngand
he-“
Orakki
ssedheragai
n.Shepout
edsul
ki
ng.“
Kana
babeyou-
“
“
Goon.Hei
sthef
atherandt
hen?
”
“
Thenhedoesn’
tknowi
tsohe-
“
Heki
ssedhery
etagai
n.Shebl
ushed.“
Let
’sl
eav
eit
.”
“
No,
Ireal
l
ywantt
oknow.
”
“
Youar
enotl
i
steni
ng.
”
Orasmil
edthenki
ssedherpr
oper
ly.HeFrench
ki
ssedhert
henpull
edbackasMia’
scli
tthrobbed.
“
Whenar
ewehav
ingsex?
”
Helaughedatj
usthowbl
untshewas.“
Wheny
ou
ar
er eady
.”
Shet
ookhi
shandandputi
tinsi
dehershor
ts.
“
Iam r
eady
.”
Hefel
therwetnessandrubbedhercl
i
t.“
No…when
youar
eemotionall
yreadytogi
veyour
sel
ftome.
”
“
Nnar
raker
atasexi
j
a!(
Ilov
esex.
)”
Oral
aughedtakingouthi shand.“Iknow,sodoI.
WhenIstar
tservingy ou,youwon’thaverest
.Idon’
t
wanthur
ryanything.Iwantust otakeitsl
ow.
I
maginesomedaywhenIgetsi ckandcan’tgiv
eyou
di
ck?Iam t
rai
ningy ouf orthat
.”
Mi
asi
ghed.“
Ok.
”
Heki
ssedher
.“Cont
inueexpl
aini
ng.
”
Ora’
sphoner
ang.Her
eachedf
orhi
sphone.“
It
’smy
babymama.”
“
Picki
t.
”
Heanswered.“
Yeah?
..
.ok…ok,
Iam comi
ng.St
ay
wi
thher.
”
Hedroppedt
hecal
l
.“I
t’
smyson.Hi
smom f
ell
when
shewaschangi
ngt
heli
ghti
nherr
oom,
sheishur
t.
Let
’sgo.
”
Miaputonherf
li
pfl
opsthentheywal
kedoutand
wenttohi
sbabymama’shouse.

*
**

Atthehouse,Miasatinthecarwhil
ehewentt oget
her.Acoupl
eofmi nuteslat
erhewalkedoutandput
herattheback.Mi
at urnedtothewomangruntingi
n
pai
n.
“
Hi…”
Thesongoti
natt
hebackwhil
eOraj
umpedi
nand
drov
eoffast
hebabymamaignor
edher
.
*
**

Att
hehospi
tal
,Mi
asmi
l
edathi
sson.
“
Youar
eonebi
gboy
!”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Thanks.
”
“
Ili
key
ourhai
rcut
.Itmakesy
oul
ookhandsome.
”
“
Ili
key
ourhai
rtoo.
”
Mi
alaughedt
henl
ookedatOr
a.“
Hei
scut
e.”
Orasmi
ledsi
tt
ingbesi
deheratt
hewai
ti
ngar
ea.
“Li
kehi
sfat
her.
”
Thedoct
orwal
kedov
er.Mi
asatst
il
lwhi
l
eOr
aspoke
tohi
m.
“
Come,
wecangoandseeher
.”
“
Evenme?
”
“
Yes,
per
fectchancet
oint
roducey
ou.
”
“
Whati
fwebr
eakup?
”
Or
alaughed.“
Don’
tbenegat
ive.Come.
”
Htookherhandandtheywentt
ohi
sbabymama’
s
r
oom.Hewal kedwi
ththei
rson.
“
Hey
…”
Thebabymamal
ookedathi
m.“
Hi.Thanksf
or
coming.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
“
Who’
sthat
?”
“
Mia,
comebabe.
”
Miawalkedover
.Thebabymamal ookedather
short
srevi
ewi
ngherthighsthenhersmal l
topt
hat
showedherbell
ybutt
on.Shewasn’tevenweari
nga
braandshecouldseeherpoint
ednipples.
“
Babe,t
hisi
sNatasha,shei
sZakes’
smot
her
,Nat
ti
e,
meetmygir
lf
ri
end,Mia.”
Natasharol
ledhereyes.“
Soy
oubr
oughty
ourt
wo
minutesgir
lf
ri
endover?”
Orasmi l
edatZakesthenturnedtohismother.“
I
don’
tlikeyouratt
it
ude,youarenotgoingto
di
srespectmygi r
lf
ri
end,Iam notgoi
ngt oal
lowit
.
Don’tevenputthi
satti
tudeinfr
ontofmyson. ”
Natashalaughed.“Ican’
tbeli
eveyou.Whydoy ou
al
way shavetobr i
nganewwomani ntothemixfrom
ti
met otimeagain?Todayy ouevenbr oughta
prost
it
utelookingwoman.Whodr essesupl i
kethi
s
i
npubl i
cspace?Nowt hatyougotti
redofmey ou
j
umpedt oy etanothernewpussyebi l
ethisone
l
ooksinfestedwithallsort
sofvir
uses.”
Mialaughed.“Rel
axlove,eketepele.Bl
oodpressur
e
ki
ll
s.Don’tbejeal
ousNat asha.Youshoulduse
budgetinsur
anceforyourhear tandbudgetyour
emotionsbecausethisti
mear oundhei snev
er
goi
ngt ocomeback.Hei sgonef orgood.
”

*
**

Latethatnight
,Ronaslowl
yopenedhi sey
esand
touchedthespacebesideshim buti
twascold.He
sighedsit
ti
ngthenreachedforhisphoneandcall
ed
her.
“
Thenumbery
ouhav
ecal
l
edi
snotav
ai-
“
Hedroppedt
hecal
landputhi
shandsonhi
sface
wonderi
ngwher
eshewas.
.
.
Li
keandcommentassoonasyoureadsowecan
squeezei
nanot
herbonusf
ami
l
y ,
don'tdel
ayus
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#135

Exhaustedandhungr y,
Kennysmiledstar
ingatthe
fuelst
ation.Shehel
dherheelsandhandbagi nher
handsandwal kedt
owardsafuelstat
ionattendant
whowassi tt
ingout
sidebusyr
eadinganov el.
“
Hi…”
Herai
sedhi
sheadandl
ookedather
.Hesmi
l
ed
st
andi
ngup.
“
Hi…”
“
CanIbor
rowy
ourphone?
”
“
Oh,
itdi
edl
ongback.Ar
eyouok?
”
“Mytyr
eburstbackther
e,It
riedt
ochangeit
,God
knowsmyhusbandl ongtol
dmet ol
earnhowtodo
thi
s,If
ail
ed.Ihadt
owal kal
lthewayf
rom wheret
he
tyr
eburst
.”
“
Hwl
onghav
eyoubeenwal
ki
ng?
”
“
Idon’
tknow…whatt
imei
sit
?It
hinkt
hreehour
s.I
s
t
her
enost
orei
nsi
de?
”
“
No.I
t’
sst
il
lnewsoi
t’
sonl
ythef
il
li
ngst
ati
on.
”
“
Wher
ear
etheot
herat
tendant
s?”
“Onehadanemergencyandhadt ogohome.Iam
alonewi
thuhh…thecashieri
nsi
demmel eeneher
phonegotst
olenl
astnight.
”
“Jesus!Ineedt
ogett oGaborone.Myhusbandand
kidsmustbewor r
ied.Iwonderwhattheyar
e
thinki
ng.”
“
Doy
ouhav
eyourchar
ger
?”
“NoIlef
titattheoff
ice.Ihadameet
ingkoJwaneng
andIwasj ustgoi
ngtogoandcomebutt hi
s
happened.”
“
Iam sor
rymysi
ster
.”
Kennycl
osedherey
est
ear
ful
l
y.“
Lor
dhav
emer
cy…”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
Shet
ookoutherphone.“
Don’
tyouhav
eachar
ger
?”
“
Ihav
eachargerathome.Wecangoandchar
ge
y
ourphonet
hencallyourhusband.
”
“
Ok…i
sitf
ar?
”
“Yes,butIcangowi thyourphone.Letitchar
geand
may becallyourhusbandforyousincey ouareti
red.
Youcanwai there.Iam notathief
.Mynamei s
LeagoSesupo.Iwor kheresoev enifIsteali
t,y
ou
canalway scomebackf ormeorwegot oget
her.”
Kennysi
ghed.“
Wear ehavi
ngsomeissues,
it’
sbestI
cal
lhi
mselfmysel
f.Let
’sgotoget
her
.”
“
Ok.
”
“
Mynamei
sKenei
l
weMot
samai
.”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Ok,
letmeal
rtt
hecashi
er.
”
Hespokebr
ief
lyt
othecashi
ert
hent
heywal
ked
away.
“
Wehav
etohur
ry.Ican’
tleav
eheral
lal
one.
”
“
Ok.
”
“Youmightwantt
oputony ourshoes.Ther
ear
e
snakesandthi
ngsthatbi
tehere.
”
Kennyputonhershoesandwal
kedwi
thhi
m.
*
**

Leagoknockedont
hedoorathi
shouse.Moment
s
l
ateranoldwomanopened.
“Nkuku,Imetthi
swomanatwork,shehada
breakdownkil
ometer
sawayandsheneedst o
chargeherphonesoshecancal
lherhusband.
”
“
It
’sok,
comei
n.”
Theywal
kedi
nsi
de.Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
It
’sok.Whathappened?
”
“Iwasspeedi
ngrushi
ngbackhome.Thet
yrej
ust
burstandt
hecarwentoffr
oad.
”
“
Ohhatl
easty
ouar
eok.
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Lebo!Br
inghersomef
ood.
”
Kennyshookherhead.“
No,
it’
sok.
”
“Ngng,
youmustbehungr
y,y
ouneedt
oeat
.Iam
notawit
ch.
”
Kennylookedatherandshookherhead.“
Ofcause
youarenotawitch.Idi
dn’
tmean…y oudon’thav
eto
giv
emef ood.Iam fi
ne.
”
“
That
’snonsense.Lebo!Wakeup!
”
Leagocamebackwit
hhischar
gerthenconnect
edi
t
tothepl
ug.“
Youcanchar
geither
e.”
“
Oht
hanky
ou.
”
Shegotupthenconnectedherphonet ohischarger
.
Thephonestar
tedcharging.Kennyswitchediton
thenl
ookedathismessagesal lofthem hi
m aski
ng
whereshewas.Shelookedatt helastone.

Husbae:Cany outellmewhereyou?Iam wor

ri
ed
aboutyou.Igetthatyouaredonewit
hmebutat
eastt
ellmewher ey ouar
e.

Shetappedt
hecal
li
conandcal
l
edhi
m.Hequi
ckl
y
pi
cked.
“Babewher
ear
eyou?Look,i
fyoudon’
twantto
comebackhome,
that
’sok.Iwi
ll
notpressur
eyou
i
ntoanyt
hingy
oudon’
twant
.Butpl
easet
ell
mey
ou
ar
esafe.
”
“IwenttoJwaneng,Iwasgoingt
ogoandcome
backbutthecartyr
eburst
.Ihadtowal
kfr
om t
her
e
toafil
li
ngstat
ionforhour
s.”
“
Wher
ear
eyounow?
”
“
Ifoundt
hiski
datthefi
ll
i
ngstat
ionandhet
ookme
t
ohishousesoIcanchargemyphone.
”
“
Ok,
sendmey ourl
ocat
ionsoIcancomeandpick
y
ouup.Iwi
l
ltal
ktosomeonetodriv
emethere.
”
“
Ok.Ar
etheki
dssl
eepi
ng?
”
“
Yes.Letmemakeapl
an,
sendmey
ourl
ocat
ion.
”
Shehungupandsenthi
m herl
ocat
iont
henshe
smil
ed.
“
Hei
scomi
ng.Thanky
ou.
”
Agir
lcamewithfoodfrom t
heki
tchen.Kennysat
downleav
ingherphoneandthecharger
.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
Ok,
Iam goi
ngbackt
owor
k.”
Hewalkedoutt
henKennygotthefood.Lebowal
ked
awayandcamebackwithadish.Kennywashedher
hands.
“
Thanksl
ove…”
Leboshylysmi
ledandwal
kedaway
.Kennysmi
l
ed
star
ingatthef
ood.
“
Mygr
andmot
herusedt
olov
ecooki
ngt
his.
”
Leago’
sgr
andmot
herl
aughed.“
It
’sni
ce.Wher
eis
she?”
“
Shepassedonyearsago.”Kennytast
edt
hen
l
aughedt
earf
ull
y.“
Ittast
esli
kehers.”
Thegr andmothersmi
l
ed.“
Well
,thepeopl
ewho
taughtusnevermademist
akes.
”
“
Yah…t
hanky
ouf
ory
ourhospi
tal
i
ty.
”
“
It
’sokmygi
rl
.Iam gl
adLeagohel
pedy
ou.
”
“
Hei
sagoodboy
.”
“
Hei
s.Wher
edoy
oust
ay?
”
“
InGabor
one.
”
“Youl
ookreal
lymodern.Ir ememberbackinour
dayswhenweal sousedt obemodern.Iwas
beaut
if
ull
ikeyou.Don’tseethesewri
nklesandt
hink
Iwasugly
.Justoldage.”
“
Youst
il
ll
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Waaiii
,IknowhowIlookmygir
l.Il
ookatmy
selfon
t
hemi r
rorever
yday
.ThankGodmyhusbanddied,
at
l
easthediedknowi
ngIwasbeautif
ul.
”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Whendi
dhedi
e?”
“
18y
ear
sback.
”
“
Wow,
suchal
ongt
ime.Andy
ounev
ermov
edon?
”
“No.Wheny oulovesomeoner eallyhard,i
t’
shardt
o
mov eon.It
’shardtoputhim behi ndyou.Itwashard
formesot heonlythingIcoulddowasacceptt hat
hewasgone.Ev erydayImi sshim, evennowIdo.If
i
twasn’tformygr andkidsIwoul dhav elongedt
odie
withhi
m becausehewasmyl i
f e.
”
Kennysmi
ledst
ari
ngatt
heoldblackandwhi
te
photoont
hewallt
aki
ngoffherheel
s.“
Ist
hathi
m?”
“
Yes,
hewasachar
mer
.Ial
way
sthoughtwewoul
d
growoldtoget herbutGodhadotherpl
ansforus.
Youalway sthinkwhenthetimecomesy ouwould
pickupthepi ecesandgoonwi t
hlif
ebutwhen
real
it
yhitsyou, youwon’tev
enwanttobreat
heor
worsekeepliv i
ng.”
“MygrandfatherpassedonwhenIwasst i
l
lyoung,
I
don’tr
eal
lyrememberhi m unt
ilIseehi
spi
ctur
es.My
grandmothernevermov edontoo.”
“That
’swhatl
ovewi
l
ldot
oyou.Wher
eisy
our
husband?
”
“
InGabor
one.West
ayt
oget
her
.”
“
Youhav
eki
ds?
”
“
Yes.4,
myf
ir
stbor
nisaboy
.ThenIhadt
ri
plet
s.”
“
Jesus!
”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Thedoct
orsaidt
heywer
etwins,
I
guesst
heotheronewashi
dingbehi
ndt
hem.”
“
Youar
ebl
essed.
”
“
Thanky
ou.Theyar
eabl
essi
ng.
”
Lebocamef
rom herr
oom wi
tht
hepi
l
ls.
“
Nkuku,
it’
sti
mef
ory
ourpi
l
ls.
”
Shegav ehert
hepil
lsthenfetchedwater.Kenny
l
ookedatt hel
it
tl
egirl
recal
li
ngt heti
meshehadt o
caterf
orhergrandmotherbecauseofhersickness.
Timeflewsofastshefoundher sel
fremember i
ng
theoldti
mes.Lebosmi l
ed.
“
It
’st
imef
orhert
osl
eep.
”
“
Ok.Iwi
l
lwai
ther
eformyhusband.
”
Thegrandmotherl
ookedather.“Goodni
ghtmygir
l.
YoucansleepwithLebo.Leago’
sroom smel
ls.
”
“
Eemma.Thanky
ou.
”
Shewal
kedaway.Kennyleanedbackonthecouch
st
ari
ngherf
eet.Minutespassedasshesatt
here.
Shemovedtotheothercouchthenl
aiddown
cl
osi
nghereyes.

*
**

Mi
atuckedi
nZakest
hensmi
l
ed.
“
Goodni
ght
.Mamai
sgoi
ngt
obef
ine.
”
“
Ok.
”
Miawal kedoutofhi sr
oom thenwenttoOra’
s
bedroom.Shegoti nbedwhi l
eheshower edt
hen
reachedforherphoneandpl ayedagamewhi l
e
waiti
ng.MinuteslaterOrawalkedoutwit
hatowel
wrappedar oundhislowerbody.
“
Ishesl
eepi
ng?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Iam sor
ryaboutNat
asha.
”
“I
t’
sok.NnaIam notmov ed.Shesoundsbit
termme
hel
aj ustsoyouknow,ifyoustar
ttwotimi
ngme
wit
hher ,Iwi
lll
eaveyou.Ifyougi
vemet hesli
ghtest
i
mpr essiont
hatther
emi ghtbemor et
hanjustco-
parenti
nggoingonIam goingto-“
Orakissedheri
nter
rupt
ingher
.Mi
atouchedhi
swet
chestastheyki
ssed.
“
Stop.Iam notgoi
ngbackt
oher.Rel
axanddon’
tbe
l
i
keNat asha.Bl
oodpr
essur
eki
ll
s.”
Shel
aughed.“
Iam j
ustsay
ing.
”
“
Iknow.
”
Hetookofft
het
owelandgoti
nbed.Mi
aundr
essed
andgoti
nhisar
ms.
“
Yoursoni
sreal
l
ycut
e.”
“
Thanks.
”
Heki
ssedherf
oreheadandhel
dhert
ight
ly.
“
Ihopey
ourot
herbabymamai
snotl
i
ket
hat
.”
“
No.Sheisact
ual
l
yniceanddoesn’
tcar
eabout
t
hingst
hathav
enothi
ngtodowithher
.”
“
Ok.
”
Shefel
lasl
eepasheheldheri
nhisar
msandhe
wonderedi
fitwasnor
maltofal
li
nlovet
hisf
ast
.

*
**

Atsi
lepar
kedt
hecari
nfr
ontofahouset
hent
urned
toLeago.
“
Isi
ther
e?”
“
Yes.
”
Atsi
lesteppedoutwithLeagoandgoti
nsi
det
he
house.TheybothlookedatKennywhowassl
eepi
ng
onthecouch.Atsi
leshookhergentl
y.
“
Kenny
…”
Kennyopenedherey
est
hegotup.“
Youar
eher
e.”
“Yeah,
Ronacoul
dn’
tcome.Heaskedmet
opi
cky
ou
up.”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Kennyl
ookedatLeago.
“
Thankyousomuch.Iwil
lcomebacksomet
imeand
t
hankal
lofyoupr
operl
y.
”
“
Eemma.
”
Shegotherphonet
hent
ookoutsomemoneyf
rom
herhandbag.
“
Ther
e.”
Leagosmi
l
ed.“
Thanky
ou.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
Theywal lwalkedoutandwentt othecar.At
sil
e
reversedthendroveoff.TheydroppedLeagoatthe
fuelstati
on.Atsi
lej
oinedtheroaddrivi
ngto
Gabor one.
“
Ronal
ovesy
ou.
”
Kennyl
ookedatAt
sil
e.“
Huh?
”
“Ronalov
esyou.Hedidn’
taskmetospeakwi
thy
ou
butthi
siswhatIknow,Ronal
ovesy
ou.Helov
esyou
somuch.”
Kenyl
ookedbackatt
heroad.“
Atsi
l
ewee,nki
se
l
apeng.(
takemehome.)Iam t
ir
ed,
Iwantt
obath
andsl
eep.”
Helaughedthent
urnedupt
hemusi
ctaki
nghert
o
herhouse.

*
**

Heparkedatt
hegate.Kennyt
ookoutther
emote
f
rom herbagandopenedthegat
ethenhedrov
ein.
“
Bye.Andt
hanks.
”
“
Youcant
hankmybr
other
.”
Sherol
ledhereyesandwalkedtowardst
hedoor .
Sheunlockedandwalkedi
nlockingbehi
ndher.She
wenttothebedroom andl
ookedatRonasleeping.
Shedroppedherthi
ngsandtookashowerbef ore
j
oini
nghimi nbed.
“
Rona.
.”Sheshookhi
m gent
ly.
“
Rona!
”
Shelookedatt
hesleepi
ngpil
lsbesi
dethebed
toget
herwit
hthepainki
l
ler
sthenjoi
nedhiminbed
fi
guri
ngtheywoul
djusttotal
ktomorrow.

*
**

Thefol l
owingdayi
nthemorning,Kennypackedt
he
chil
dren’sl
unchboxesthenputthem i
nthebagas
theyfini
shedupeati
ng.
“
Goandsayby
etodaddy
.Hur
ry,
theschool
busi
s
al
mosther
e.”
Thetri
plet
srushedtot
hebedroom asKennycl
osed
thei
rschoolbags.War
onacameback.
“
Daddyi
snotwaki
ngup.
”
“
What
?”
“
Hei
snotwaki
ngup.
”
Kennyfr
ownedandwentt ot
hebedroom wher
eshe
l
ookedatRona.Shest ar
edathimforamoment ,
he
hadn’
tmov edorchangedposit
ionsi
ncel
astni
ght.
Shewalkedover.
“
Rona!
”
Sheshookhi
m.
“
Rona!
”
Thekidswatchedasshet
ri
edt
owakehi
m up
pani
cking.

Don'tfor
gett
olikeandcomment l
et'
shav
eour
eveningi
nser
ttomorrowmorni
ng.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#136

“
Rona!Uh…Guy
s,goandt
akey
ourbags.
”
Theki
dssl
owl
ywal
kedout
.Tear
sfi
l
ledherey
es.
“
Rona!
”Shesl
appedhi
scheek.
Ronamov
edopeni
nghi
sey
es.
“
OhGod…”
Ronal
ookedatherdr
owsy
.
“
ThankGod…Iwassoscar
ed.
”
Theki
dswal
kedbacki
nthensmi
l
ed.
“
Daddy
!”
Theyhuggedhi
m.
“
Guy
s,t
heschool
busi
sher
e.Let
’sgo.
”
Shewal
kedoutwit
hthem asRonacl
osedhiseyes
feel
i
ngdrowsy
.Kennycamebackminut
eslater
.She
l
ookedathim.
“
Rona…”
Ti
red,
heopenedhi
sey
esandl
ookedather
.“Hey
…”
“
Youwoul
dn’
twakeup.Ar
eyouok?
”
“Yeah…Idrankmypai
nki
ll
ers.Mylegswer
epai
nful
.
Thepainki
l
lerswer
enothel
ping.
”
“
Isawy
ourf
ood…y
oudi
dn’
teat
.”
“
Ihadaheadache.
”
“Youshoul
dn’
tdr
inkpi
l
lsonanempt
yst
omach.You
almostgav
emeaheartatt
ack.
”
“
Sor
ry.
”
Shel
ookedathi
m unsur
eofwhatt
osay
.Hecl
osed
hi
seyessl
eepy.
“
Iwi
l
lmakey
ousomet
hingt
oeat
.”
Shegotupandwal kedtotheki
tchenandstar
ted
prepar
inghi
sbreakfast
.Herphonerangfr
om the
ki
tchencount
ers.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Kenny
…”
“
MmagweTumo,
howar
eyou?
”
“
Iam f
ine,
howar
eyou?
”
“
Iam ok.
”
“
Whatdidyoudecide?RragweTumowasaski
ngif
youwantustogetinvol
ved.Wecanhav
eafamil
y
meeti
ngwit
hhisfamilyandus.
”
“No,
thatwon’tbeneeded.Idon’
twantpeopl
einmy
busi
ness.RonaandIwillsol
veouri
ssuesonour
own.”
MmagweTumo.“
Cani
tpl
easenotendwi
tha
di
vor
ce?
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Aowbat
hongmama…”
MmagweTumol aughed.“ Iam j
ust…koor eIfeel
li
ke
yourchil
dandmypar entsar edivorci
ng.Iam holding
mybr eat
h.Kanalentsenyast r
esslona.( Youar e
str
essingme.)Maybey oucansepar ateforawhile
eventhoughIwouldn’tencourageit.Iwantt oadvise
youbutIdon’tt
hinkIam goi ngtogi v
ey outhebest
advi
ce.Idon’
tevenknowwhatt otellyou.”
“
Howi
srr
agweTumo?
”
“
Kenei
l
we!
”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Stopwor
ryi
ng.I
t’
snotgoodf
ory
our
heal
th.
”
“
Any
way
s,Igotacal
lfr
om y
ourmot
her
.”
“
Oh?
”
“
Yes.Appar
ent
lyIt
urnedMi
aagai
nsther
.”
“
What
?”
“Yes.ShesaysMi adoesn’ttalktoheranymor eand
asusual i
t’
smyf ault
.Atleastshedi dn’
tsounddr unk.
Iheardsheisstayingwit
ht hisman, afarmer.You
knowy ourmother,alway
sl ookingforgreener
pastureseveni
nherol dage.Ihopesheset t
lesthere
rekalapa.
”
Kennylaughed.“Idon’
tknowwhatshei st
alking
about.MiaandIsendhermoneyev erymont h,she
neveracknowledgesit.Wedon’tevenknowwher e
sheis.Wheny oucallshedoesn’tpi
ck.”
“
Wai
i
,that
’sKef
ifory
ou.
”
“
Buti
t’
sok.
”
“Ok,byeKenny
.Makethedecisi
onst
hatwil
lmake
youhappy.YesIwil
lbehurti
fyoudi
vor
cebutatthe
endofthedayyourhappi
nesscomesfi
rst
.IfRona
cheati
ng-
“
“
Icheat
edt
oo.
”
“
Youknowwhat
,by
e.”
KennylaughedasMmagweTumohungup.She
fi
nishedprepar
ingthebreakfastthenwal kedtothe
bedroom andfoundhim sleeping.Shecur i
ousl
y
l
ookedathi sphonethenputt hef ooddownandgot
i
t.Sheenteredtheoldpasswor dt hensmi l
edasit
unl
ocked.Shesi l
entl
ywentt othebat hroom where
shesatont hetoi
letseatgoingthr oughhis
messages.Shewentt ohiswhat sappt henopened
al
lthemessages, shelookedatt heonewi thPastor
Pil
ane.
PastorPilane:OurSundayservi
cesst ar
tat9and
endat1230.Youshoul d,
y ouwi
llenjoyit
.God
acceptsev ery
oneinhishouse.Hei salovingGod,
nomat terhowbi gyoursinscanbe,hewi l
l al
way
s
openhisar msf oryou.
Hehadr
epl
i
edl
ateatni
ght
.
Rona:
Ok.Iwi
l
lcome.Thanky
ou.
Kennyopenedhisfacebookt henopenedal
lhi
s
unreadmessages.Lord,theywerealotandmostl
yit
wast hel
adi
es.Sherolledhereyesreadi
ngone.
Facebookuser
:Hey
, t
herrawenaIhavebeen
fol
lowi
ngyouandIreall
yli
keyou.Canwegoout
sometime?
“Mxm.”Sheblockedtheuserthenscrol
l
eddowntil
l
shecameacr ossLesego’
smessages.Alloft
hem
sentatdi
ff
erentyearsandti
mesandnonr epl
iedor
evenopened.Sheopenedthenscroll
edthr
ough.
Lesego:Hey,Ihavebeentr
yingt
ogethol
dofyou.I
am sickandIreal
lyneedhel
p.CanIcometoy
our
off
icesandseey ou.
Lesego: RonaIwasr apedweeksback.Iam not
feel
ingwel l.WhenIt el
lpeoplet
heythi
nkIwantedit.
Iam scar ed.Pleasehelpme.Icamet oyouroff
ices
andt heywoul dn’tl
etmei n.
Lesego:
Hey
,Iam sor
ryi
fIcausedanyf
ight
s
betweeny ouandy ourgir
lfr
iendtoday.Ijustneeded
hel
p.Iam slowlydy i
ng.Iam smel l
ingthingsandI
am scared.Ihavedecidedtoendmyl ife.Ican’
tdo
thi
sanymor e.Iam sorryforever
y t
hingIev erdi
d.I
am sorr
yf orhurt
ingyou.Youwer et heonlymanwho
hadeverlovedmel i
keyoudi dandIwi l
l f
orever
cheri
shthat.Bytheway ,Kennyisreallybeautif
ul,
sheisforkeeps.
Lesego:Hey,Ihungmysel
fbuttheyfoundme.Iam
beingtr
eated.Thedoct
ori
snice.Heisnotjudgi
ng
meandhei swhit
esoIguessit
’sexpected.
Lesego:
Hey,Iam muchbet
ter
.Iknowi
t’
sbeen
monthseversi
ncethel
astt
ext.Howar
eyoudoing?
Lesego:Congratul
ati
ons,j
ustsawyourweddi
ng
pi
ctures.Yoursonishandsome.Andyourwif
e!Wow!
Youhitthejackpot
!
Lesego:Hey,Igotaj
ob!AndthedoctorandIhavea
real
lygoodthinggoi
ngon.Heisreal
l
yniceandt hi
s
ti
mear oundIam notgoi
ngtomakeanymi stakes.
Lesego:
Hey,
Ijustgavebi
rthtomyf i
rstbor
n,I
namedherNi
cole.Sheisbeauti
ful
.Iam get
ti
ng
mar
ri
edi
n6mont
hs.
Lesego: Hey,gosh,
it’
sbeenay earsincet
helast
message.Ther rawenay ourkidsarebeauti
ful
.
Especiall
ytheothergir
lwhol ookslikehermom.O
bolai
l
el ait
aka.Bytheway ,hubbygotaj obinNew
York,wewi ll
bemov ingthere.Iam soexcit
ed.
Thatwasthelastmessage.Kennywentt oLesego’
s
profi
l
ethenlookedatherpi
ctur
eswi t
hherf amil
y.
Shehadtwoki dsandawhitehusband.Shesmi l
ed
thenhear
treactedonthepi
cture.Shewentbackt o
themessagesandstoodupaboutt owalkout.She
pausedseei
ngamessagef rom Bofelo.
Bofelo:HiArona.IfoundoutthatyourwifeandIare
actuall
ysist
ers.Iam scaredtoapproachher
becauseofwhathappenedbet weenEsi andI.I
f
thereisachance, canyoupleasehelpmer euni
te
withher.Iwouldr eal
l
ylovetgettoknowherwi thout
causingconfli
cts.Thanks.
Kennyl
ookedatt hemessage,i
thadbeensent
al
mostay earback.Shewalkedoutt
henputhi
s
phoneasi
deandshookhi m.
“
Rona.Wakeup.Youneedt
oeat
.”
Sheshookhi
m abi
thar
derwaki
nghi
m up.
“
Youneedt
oeat
.Imadebr
eakf
ast
.”
Shehel
pedsi
tupr
ightt
henl
ookedathi
sbushyf
ace,
“
Iam goi
ngt
ocal
li
nabar
bert
odayt
ofi
xyou.
”
Hesl
owl
ysmi
l
ed.“
Youdon’
thav
eto.
”
“
Iam goi
ngt
o.”
“
Whatt
imear
eyougoi
ngt
owor
k?”
“
Iam notgoi
ngt
oday
.”
“
Why
?”
“Whowil
lstaywit
hyouifIgo?Aker
ewenayou
deci
dedt
odi dn’
twanty
ourlegsanymor
e.Youwant
tobeacri
pple.
”
Hel
ookedatherwi
thasmi
l
e.“
Want
lwael
aKenny
.”
Shelaughed.“I
magineleav
ingyoualonethennex
t
thi
ngy ougetacallandIam t
oldyoufel
landtook
offyourteet
h.I
jo!Eat.
”
Shest
art
edf
eedi
nghi
m.
“
Myhandscanwor
k.”
“Heelarr
a,enjoythis,
akereourmarri
ageworking
wasbeingdet er
mi nedbymeshowi ngupornot .I
didn’
tcome, i
tmeanskedi v
orcehel
aakere.Iam
goingtotal
ktomyl awyerandhavethepr
oceedi ngs
start
edon.Everyonewal kswaywithwhat
-“
“Soyouser
iousl
ywanttoleav
emewhi leIam si
ck?
Justhowevil
areyou?Kealwala.(
Iam si
ck.
)”
Kennysmil
ed.“
So?Youwi
llj
ustcal
lyournur
se
aker
enowshecanworkbecauseIwil
lbegone.She
wil
lmassageyou.
”
“
Tlhammadon’
tbeliket
his.Kanakeagor
ataKenny
.
(
Ilovey
ouKenny
.)”
Shelaughed.“
Ngng,wenarraomaaka.(
Youar
ea
l
iar
.)Youliesomuchit
’sexhaust
ing.
”
“
Pleasedon’tl
eaveme.Kebakil
e.Nnammakeago
r
ata.(Ihav
elearntmyl
esson.Il
oveyou.
)”
“
Oratamang?Nna?(Whodoyoul
ove?Me?)Iam
l
eav
ingyou.Oti
legosal
aol
enosi
.(Youar
egoingt
o
r
emainal
one.)
”
“
Nnakeagana.(
Iam r
efusi
ng.
)”
Shelaughedev enmor e.“Iam l
eavi
ngyougapennaI
am sti
llbeaut
if
ul.Icanalway sgetmarri
edagai
nbut
you….Youhavewhi tehairinyourhead.
”
“
War
engnar
e?(
Whatar
eyi
usay
ing?
)”
“Youaregrowingold.SoonenoughQwi l
lbegoingto
univer
sit
y.Thenhei sgoingt
ohav eafamilywenao
ntseocheater,(whi
lestyouarest
il
lcheati
ng,)
anywho,nnaIwoul dhavelongmov edonakere
wenay oucan’thandleit
.Maybeyouwi l
lbedatinga
youngwoman.Kanat heyloveol
dmenl ikeyou.
Sugardaddy.”
Ronat
ookt
heplateandputi
tawayt
henpul
l
edher
i
nhisar
mskissi
ngherneck.
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Ng,
wenat
hecheat
er.
“Kantewhyam Ibeingcruci
fi
edalone?Youal
so
cheated.Butanyways,
akerennaIknowwhat
forgi
venessis,Ihav
eforgi
venyou.I
fyouwanttogo
tohell
,that
’syourownissue.
”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Iwi
l
lgot
ohel
lbutIam l
eav
ing
you.
”
“
Iam goi
ngt
olocky
oui
nsi
deher
e.”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Warengwenacr
ippl
edman?I
ja,
st
ayinyourwheel
chai
r.
”

*
**

Atschool
,QlookedatSadiasshesteppedoutof
hermother
’scar.Shel
ookedsmartandcleanas
al
ways.Shewalkedoverashermotherdroveaway,
asmileonherface.
“
Hey
…”
“
Hi.Igoty
ouachocol
ate.
”
“
Letmehav
eit
.”
Hegotitfr
om hisbagandgavei
ttoher.Sadismil
ed
thenputi
tinherbag.Afor
m 3walkedpastthem
star
ingatherpr
ett
yface.
“
HiSadi
.”
“
Hi…”
Qgotherhandandhelditcl
aimingwhat’
shis.Sadi
bl
ushedastheybothwalkedtothei
rcl
ass.They
bothsatonthei
rseat
s.Sadi
’sdeskmatewalked
overandsatbesi
deher.
“
Hey
..
”
“
Hi.
”
“Heel
a,Ihear
dthatwenal
eQl
ajol
a(y
ouandQar
e
dati
ng.
)”
Sadifr
owned.“ Stopwitht
heliesBaone.Ija,you
di
dn’thearany t
hing,
youarelooki
ngf orl
ies.QandI
arej
ustfriends.Letmehearli
escirculat
ing,ketl
il
e
gogopat aganyal et
afol
eyeo!Iwil
lbeatt hegossi
p
outofyou.Iam noty ourf
ri
end.”
BaonelookedatherasSadi
glar
edatherdar
ingher
tosaysomethi
ng.
“
Ij
osor
rymma!
”
“
Mxm.
”
*
**
Miawal kedoutofherhouseholdingherflaskof
coffee,l
aptopbagandhandbagi nashor twhite
dressandheel s.Shegoti
nhercart henputdown
herthingsdownt henstar
tedt
hecarandr eversed.
Sher eachedforherphoneandcalledhersister.
Kennypi
ckedl
aughi
ng.“
Hey
…ther
rast
op!
”
Mi
asmi
l
edashersi
stergi
ggl
ed.“
Badt
imi
ng?
”
“
Hey
…whati
sit
?”
“
Arey
oucomi
ngt
owor
k?”
“
No.Ihav
etocar
efort
hiscr
ippl
edman.
”
Miaheardi
sdeepvoi
cesayi
ngsomet hi
ngi
nthe
backgr
oundthent
heybot
hlaughed.
“
Sor
ry,
whatdi
dyouwant
?”
“
Wewi
l
ltal
ktomor
rowatwor
k.”
“
Ok.
”
Miahungupjoini
ngthemorningt
raf
fic.Thedriv
er
besi
deherr
olleddownhiswindowstaringather.
“
Hey
…”
Mi
atur
nedherheadandl
ookedathi
m.
“
Iam i
nar
elat
ionshi
pandIam l
oyal
!”
Hel
aughed.“
Ok!Wel
l
,wheny
oudeci
de-
“
“
BoyBy
e!”
Sherol
ledupherwi
ndowandsmi
l
eddr
ivi
ngal
ong
wit
hothercar
s.

*
**

Atsi
lefi
nisheddressi
nglookingatt
hetime.He
walkedoutofthebedroom inhispoor
lyir
onedsui
t.
April
walkedfrom theki
tchen.
“
Taket
hatsui
tonthecouchoapol
edi
otseo.(
and
t
ookof
fthoset
hings.
)”
Atsi
lelookedathissuitonthecoucht henqui
ckl
y
tookitandchangedrightthere.Apr
ill
ookedathi
m
ashel ookedsexyandhandsomei nthesui
t,t
hat
hair
cutmadei tevenwor se.
“Ng,nextcomebackwit
hHI V.Aker
ewenaosela
sel
ahel a,
Ican’
twai
ttogiv
ebi r
thandl
ookhotagai
n
mxm. ”
Heshamef ul
l
yfixedhi
sti
e.Apri
lcli
ckedhertongue
walkingt
othebedroom t
alki
ngalone.At
sil
ehurri
ed
outlooki
nghandsomeandt i
dy.

*
**

Esit
hought
ful
l
ysatinherof
fi
cet
henr
eachedf
orher
phoneandcal
ledKenny
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,canwe-
“
“Li
stenher e,
don’
tevercallme.Iwantnothi
ngt odo
withyou.Onoga( youareasbnake)andIwi l
lnot
associat
ewi tht
hat.Idon’
tknowhowy ouwil
lexplai
n
toMaat l
awhyy oucan’tcomet ohisbrot
her’
shouse
butifIcatchyouanywherenearmyhouseIam
goingtotakeoffal
l yourt
eeth.I
fIcatchyou
anywherenearmyhusband, Iwi
llsi
mplykil
lyou.”
Kennyhungup.Esiputdownt
hephoneandputher
handsoverherf
ace.

6MONTHSLATER
.
.
Goodmor
ning
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#137

Si
xMont
hsLat
er.
..

Atthehairsal
on,
Kennypressedherl
i
pst
oget
her
st
aringatherhai
rdr
esser
.
“
Doy
oul
i
kei
t?”
Thehair
dressernodded.“Yes…youl
ookwow!Ican’
t
bel
iev
eIwasscar edthroughout
.”
Shelookedatever
yoneinthesalonwhowaslooking
atherandsomewher eevenholdingt
hei
rphones
taki
ngvideoswhil
eherl
onghairlayonthefl
oor.
“
Youwantt
otakeal
ook?
”
KennylookedatSasaandWawa.“
Guy
s,whatdoy
ou
thi
nk?”
Waronasmil
ed.“
Youlookbeaut
if
ul.Il
i
kedy
ourhai
r
butyoul
ookreal
l
ybeauti
ful
.”
“
Sasa?
”
Sasagi
ggl
ed.“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Ok.Iam l
ooki
ng.
”
Kennyturnedherchairthenlookedatthemirr
or.She
gaspedstar i
ngathershortcurl
s.Shelookedatthe
wavesatt hesidethensmiled.I
tlookedli
keaweav e
butitwasj ustherhai
r.
“
Wow!
”
“
Doy
oul
i
kei
t?”
“
Ihadmyhai
rfory
ear
sandnev
ercut
.Il
ovet
his.
”
Thehai rdressersmiledt hent ookacoupl eof
picturesforhersocial medi apages.Kennypai dt
hen
walkedoutwi thhergirls.Theygoti nthecar ,t
he
girl
satt hebackwi tht heirnewl ongbraids.Kenny
tookherphonet hent ookaf acebookli
vev ideo
smi l
ingathernewhai rstyle,thegir
lsstoodupand
smi l
edatt hecamer aast hev ideorol
l
ed.
“
Mama,
arewel
i
ve?
”
Kennylaughed.“Yeshun…bat
hong,
Ican’tshi
ne
proper
lywiththeseki
ds.Howismyshorthair
?”
Sar
onapout
ed.“
Howi
smi
net
oo?
…it
’sni
ce.
”
War
onabat
tedherey
elashes.“
Minei
sni
cet
oo.
.”
Kennyl
aughedr
eadi
ngthecomment
s,shecame
acr
ossMia’
scomment.
“Bat
hongMi ammathesekidsdon’tgi
vemeabr eak.
KooreIcan’
tbecut
einpeace.Iam goingt
ogive
someone’ssonahear
tatt
ack.Niggawon’tseet
his
onecoming.”
Shesmi
l
edr
eadi
ngmor
ecompl
i
ment
s.
“Thanky ou.Bat
hongIhaven’
tseenmysel
fli
kethis
i
ny ears.Kooreeversi
nceIcametoGabsforvarsi
ty,
Inevercutmyhai r.
”
Kennyreadmorecomments.“Okguys,Ij
ustwant
ed
toshowy oumynewhai
r.Gir
ls,saybye.
”
“
Bye!
”
Kennylaughedt henstoppedthevi
deo.Shetooka
coupleofselfi
eswi t
hhergirl
sanduploadedanew
prof
il
epi ct
ureknowingRonawoul dn’
tseeityet
.She
star
tedthecarr ol
li
ngdownt hewindowsthendrove
offt
urningupherr adio.Thegi
rl
ssangattheback,
shej
oinedi
nsi
ngi
ng.
Shedroppedtheki
dsoffathomet henwal
kedi
nsi
de
thebedr
oom whereshechangedintoashor
tdr
ess
andheels.Shewal
kedoutandlookedatQwhowas
play
ingav i
deogamewithLarr
y.
“
Q,Iam goi
ngt
ocol
l
ectdaddy
.”
“
Ok.
”
“Pl
easeal
sogivethegi
rl
sachancet
owat
chTv
.You
can’
tpl
ayvideogamesthewhol
eday.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
IfIhearanycompl
aint
sIam t
aki
ngt
hatgame.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shesighedthenwalkedoutandgoti
nthecar
.She
drov
eof fpi
ckingherri
ngi
ngphone.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
,PusoandIar
einGabor
one.Wej
ustar
ri
ved.
”
“
Oh,youshouldcomel
ater
.Wear
ehav
ingabr
aai
wi
thhisbr
others.
”
“Hol
don,l
etmeaskhim…babe, Kennysayst
heyar
e
havi
ngabraai
atherhousel
ateron.Shoul
dwego?”
Kennydr
ovewi t
honehandwhi
l
ehol
dingt
hephone
wit
htheotherhand.
“
OkKenny
,wewi
l
lther
e.Whoel
sewi
l
lbet
her
e?”
“MiaandOra,
Atsi
leandApril
,Bof
eloandher
husbandar
ealsocoming.Peotoo.
”
“
Ok,
lat
ert
hen.
”
“
Shar
p.”
Shehungupdr ivi
ng.Shepar kedt hecarawhi lelater
thenst eppedoutoft hecarandcat walkedi nsidet he
buil
ding.Shesmi ledst andingbyt hedoorst aringas
Ronal aughedwi thhisphy siotherapistwhi l
et heydi d
thei
rlegexer cises.Godt hi
smanwashandsome,
shelov edhowhel aughed, hehadsuchacont agious
l
aught hatshef oundher selfgigglingwonder ing
whathewast alkingabout .Hist -
shi r
tli
ftedexposi ng
thatv-l
ine.Shef oundher selfstar
ingathi sdickpr int
andsheputherl egst ogether.Theywer ehav ingsex
onlyonceamont h,pastorPi l
ani’
sl esson.Hehad
saidhewant edt oseei ftheywoul dsurvivewi thout
sexandhonest
ly,
shecoul
dbehonestwi
thher
sel
f
andsayno.
Itwasonet hi
ngt onothav esexandot hert onot
havesexwhi l
elyingwi ththedi
ckev er
yni ght
.That
oneni ghti namont htheyhadsexwasn’ tenough.
Shemi ssedhi m somuchbuthewasv erymuch
dedicatedt otheexer cise.Goshhubbyl ookedso
yummy .Shecl osedherey esbri
efl
ythenwal kedin.
Hisphy siot
herapistturnedandlookedatheral most
chokingonhi ssal i
va.Hecoughedacoupl eoftimes.
Ronat ur nedandf rozest ari
ngathi
swi fe.
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Hey
…”
“
Wow!
”
“
Doy
oul
i
kei
t?”
“
Ist
hatawi
g?”
Sheshookherhead.“
Icuti
t.
”
“
Youwer
eser
ious?
”
“
Ng…”
Ronasmi
l
edst
ari
ngather
.“Fuckwow!
”
“
Isi
tni
ce?
”
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul,
you…wow.
..
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Thanks.
”
“
Wowbabe…”
Hest aredatherf ace.Theonl ytimehecoul d
rememberev erseeingherwi t
hshor thairwast he
fi
rsttimehehadmetherandhehadal most
forgottenjusthowbeaut i
fulshelookedwi t
hshor t
hair.Hepul ledhercloserandgav eheraj ui
cyki ss.
Shef elthisdi ckj
erkingonherst omach.Sher ubbed
hisbicepsasheki ssedherev enmor e.Kennyput
herhandi nsidehispantsandt ouchedhi sdick.Fuck
i
t,shemi ssedt hi
smonst erandshecoul dn’tpretend
any mor e.Damn, i
twashar dwor kbeinghol y.She
helditinherhandsget ti
ngwet terast hekiss
i
ntensified.
Ronast
opped.“
Takey
ourhandof
f.
”
Shel
ookedathi
m,l
ustf
il
li
ngherey
es.“
Imi
ssy
ou.
Don’
tyoumissmet
oo?”
“
Youhear
dwhatt
hepast
orsai
d.”
“Whathedoesn’
tknowdoesn’
thav
etohur
tanyone.I
don’
tcareanymore,
cal
lmeawhoreorwhatnot
.I
missyou.”
Thephysi
other
apistcl
ear
edhi
sthr
oat
.Ronast
epped
backastear
sfil
ledKenny
’sey
es.
“
Iwi
l
lwai
tint
hecar
.”
Shetur
nedandwal
kedaway.Shesteppedoutoft
he
bui
ldi
ng.Amanwal
kedpastherthenhetur
ned.
“
Hi…”
“
Hel
l
o.”
Shegotinhercarandsatdown.Herphoner
ang,
she
reachedf
oritandpicked.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Weneedt
otal
k.”
“
Nat
han?
”
“
Toni
ght
.”
Herbreat
hingpi
ckedasshegotangr
y.“
Didn’
tIev
er
t
elly
ounott oev
ercal
lme?”
“Watchhowyoutal
ktome.Iwi
l
lendt
hatmar
ri
age
ofyourswi
thonepi
ctur
e.”
Kenny
’shear
tski
pped.“
What
?”
“Let
’smeetatC- SKYhot
elat7p.m,ifyoudon’t
showup, Iam sendi
ngyourhusbandsomething
i
nterest
ing.
”
“
Youar
ely
ing!
”
“
Am I
?”
“Youaresi
ck.St
ayawayfr
om me!Whatdoyouwant
from me?YouknewIwasmarr
iedwhenwehadsex,
Ineversai
dIwouldl
eav
emyhusbandforyou!
”
“Whosai danythi
ngabouty ouleavingyourhusband?
Look, comeat7, Ibookedthesamesui tewehad
thatnight.Youchoosenott oshowup, whateveryou
thoughtyouwer efixingwil
lbelostandthi
st i
mehe
i
sj ustgoingtodivorceyou.”
“
Youhav
enot
hing.Youar
etr
yingt
o-“
“Ok,l
etmesendittoy outhen.Yourprobl
em i
syou
thi
nkIwantyou.Idon’twantyouKeneilwenei
ther
doIwanttodestroyyourmar r
iage.Iwantust
ot al
k,
that
’sall.It
’si
mport
antsoifyoudon’
tshowupthen
well
,y ourhusbandi
sgoingtoseethepi
ctur
esIam
sendingy ou.”
Hehungup.Minuteslat
erherphonev i
brat
ed.She
openedawhatsappmessagef rom t
henumberhe
hadcall
edwit
hthensheopenedt hepictur
eswhil
e
herhear
tpounded.Shelookedathersel
fti
edupwi t
h
hi
sdickdeepinher.Shefel
therwholebodyfreez
e
assheopenedallt
hepictures.
“
OhmyGod…”
Ronawalkedfrom t
hebui l
ding.Kennyqui
ckl
y
del
etedal
l t
hepict
uresthenputawayherphone.
Ronagotinsi
deandl ookedather.
“
Hey
…”
“
Iwi
l
ltakeushome.
”
Ronasmi led.“ImissyoutoobutIjustwantour
marriagetowor kandIt r
ustpastorPi
lane.It
’sal
so
hardtocont r
ol mysel
f,Iam l
it
erall
ydyingtofuckyou
butifthi
sexercisebenefit
sus,whyshoul dn’
twedo
i
t?”
Kennynodded.“
Youar
eri
ght
.”
Hel ookedatherfacet
henheleanedoverandki
ssed
her.Kennyforcedasmileonherfacet
hendrove
them home.

*
**

Lat
ert
hatdayEsiateherf
rui
tswatchi
ngTV.Maat
la
wal
kedfr
om thebedroom dr
essedupfrot
hebr
aai
.
“
Let
’sgo.
”
“Maat
layouknowIcan’
tgother
e.NotwhenKenny
andIarenoti
ngoodbooks.
”
“
Youar
enotgoi
ngt
her
eforKenny
.”
“
It
’sgoi
ngtobeawkwar
dandgapennaIam t
ryi
ng
t
oavoiddr
ama.”
“
YouandKennyatsomepoi
ntwi
l
lhav
etomeet
.”
“
Ijustwantt
okeepmydi
stance.
”
“
Pleasest
opt
his.Youdon’
tev
enhav
etot
alkt
oher
.
Shei
snottheonl
ywomant
hatwi
l
lbet
her
e.Peowi
l
l
al
sobether
e.”
“
Maat
lapl
ease-
“
“Stopbeingchil
dish.Kanayanongthisi
sal
so
strai
ningmyr el
ati
onshipwithRona.Thi
ngsar
eeven
awkwar dbetweenusbutt hatfeel
i
ngwasnever
there.
”
“
Maat
la-
“
“
Let
’sgo.Iam notl
i
steni
ngany
mor
e.”
Shel
ookedathi
sser
iousf
ace.“
Kenny
-“
“
Let
’sgo!
”
Sheslowlystoodupthenwenttothebedroom
whereshechangedandf ol
lowedhimtothecarwit
h
herhandbag.Shesil
entl
ysatint
hecarwhi l
ehe
droveoff
.Shecoudn’tseem t
ocomeupwi t
ha
bett
erexciseandheseemedt obegett
ingannoyed
ever
ysingleti
me.
Maatl
aparkedhi
scarawhi l
elaterthenst
eppedout
.
Theguyswereal
readyoutsi
debr aai
ng.Maatl
a
fr
ownedlooki
ngBofel
o’shusband.
“
Bof
eloi
sher
e.”
“
See?Thi
siswhy
-“
“Bof
eloi
sKenny’ssi
sterandthereisnothi
ngwecan
doaboutthat
.Canyoustopcompl aini
ngabout
ever
ythi
ngbabe?Peoisalsohere.”
Theysteppedoutandwalkedov er
.Maatlabumped
shoul
derswi t
hhisbrot
hersthenLebit
soandMi a’
s
boyfr
iend.HelookedatBofel
o’shusbandandthey
bumpedf ist
s.”
Aronasmiled.“
Maat
la,
thi
sisPuso,
Tshenol
o’s
boyfr
iend.
”
“
Sur
ebaf
ethu!Thi
sismybeaut
if
ulwoman,
Esi
.”
Esi
smi
l
edatt
heguy
s.
“
Higuy
s.”
Theyexchangedpleasantri
esthenEsiwalkedinsi
de
thehousewheretheladieswerechatt
ing.She
l
ookedatallofthem feel
ingli
keanoutcast.Peopl
e
tur
nedtoher.
“
Hey
…”
Esif
orcedasmileast heyall
tur
nedtoher.Kenny
fr
ownedasPeowal kedoverandhuggedpregnant
Esi
.April
alsowalkedov er
.
“
Heygi
rl
!”
“
Heyguy
s.”
Kennysighedthenturnedbacktowhatshewas
doi
ng.Awhi lel
atertheladi
eswalkedoutwi
ththei
r
campchai r
sasnicemusi cplay
ed.Maatl
athr
ew
awayhisempt ycan.
“
Ist
her
emor
ebeeri
nsi
det
hehouse?
”
Ronanodded.“
Yes.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hewal
kedi
nsi
det
hehouse.

*
**

Meanwhi
lei
nthekit
chen,Kennygotherj
uicef
rom
t
hefri
dgeasEsiwal
kedinsi
deandlookedather.
“
Canwet
alk?
”
“Moesi
,Isai
dnev
ercomet omyhouseandyety
ou
areher
eandnowy ouwanttot
alkt
ome? ”
“Kenny,wecan’tgoonl
ikethismoreespeci
all
y
consider
ingourmenarebrother
s.Imessedup.Iam
sorr
y.Canwepl easeworkt
hingsthrough?Wecan’
t
keepdoingthi
s.”
“Yousl eptwithmyman!Howdoy ouexpectmet o
forgiv
ey ou?Youwer emeantt obemyf r
iendbutyou
wer ebusyopeni ngyourlegsaround.Iam nev er
goingt oforgi
vey ouforwhaty oudid.Howcoul dyou
sleepwi thhim?Youwer emeantt or espectour
fri
endshipnott obetr
aymel i
kethat.Maat l
adoesn’t
knowhei sgetti
ngbackt ogetherwithawhor ewho
canopenherl egsfor-
”
Kennypausedst
ari
ngMaat
lawhohadwal
kedi
n.
“
Whi
canopenherl
egsf
orwho?
”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#138

Kennyl
ookedMaat
laandsmi
l
ed.
“
Whocanopenherlegsanot
hermanwhi
l
emarr
ied.
Whenshesl
eptwi
thSeanshewasamarri
ed
woman.
”
Maat
lasi
ghed.“
Kenny
,cany
oust
opt
his?
“
Kennyl
ookedatEsi
.“Thent
ell
yourwi
fet
ost
ay
awayfr
om me.”
“Youcan’
that
eherjustbecauseshecal
l
edyouout
onyourcheat
ing.Whatki
ndoffri
endwouldshebei
f
sheli
edtoyou?”
Kennysmil
ed.“
Youdon’
tknowherIswear
,hopef
ull
y
onedayyoudo.
”
“
Whatar
eyout
alki
ngabout
?”
Kenny’
sphoner
ang.Sher
eachedfori
tandpi
cked
walki
ngoutl
eav
ingMaatl
awithEsi
.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
Esisi
ghedrubbi
ngherbump.“ Maat l
a,KennyandI
arenoti
ngoodbooksatt hemoment .Comingher
e
i
sjustabadidea.Idon’
twantt ostr
essmy sel
fand
l
osemybaby .Ifeel
li
keanout castri
ghtnowandI
j
ustwanttogohome.I fyouwantt oremainbehi
nd,
fi
nebutIwanttogohome.Pl ease…”
Maat
lal
ookedather
.“I
t’
sok.Wecangohome.
”
“No.Youcanst ay.Idon’
twantt ocauseadr if
t
betweenyouandy ourbr
other.Youguy sareclose
andmyi ssueswithKennyhav enot hi
ngtodowi t
h
youandAr ona.Youshouldn’tsufferf
orthat.Arona
shoul
dn’tsufferf
orthat.
”Sheki ssedhim.“Atsi
lewil
l
dropyouof f
.Iam going.
”
“
Icancomewi
th.
”
“
No.St
ay.Enj
oyy
our
sel
f.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shetookthecarkeysthenwalkedoutandwentt
o
thecar.Maatl
agrabbedthecanofbeerandwent
outsi
dejoi
ninghi
sbr ot
hers.
*
**

Kennycl
osedherbedr
oom door
.
“
Nat
epl
easest
opt
his.
”
Hesi ghed.“Ijustwanty outot al
ktoy ourhusband
Kenny .Myki dsarenotsaf e,therei
sacart hatkeeps
foll
owingt hem everyday.Het hreat
enedt ohur tt
hem
andhei sdoingjustthat.Iam getti
ngpar anoid.Iam
nevergoi ngtosendt hosepict ur
estoany one.Mat ter
offact,Ineverment ionedthem becauseIwasnev er
goingt ouset hem againstyou.Ilovey ouandt he
reasonwhyIhav ebackedof fisbecauseIknowy ou
l
ov ehim andIam notgoi ngtobet her easonwhy
youar eunhappy .”
“
Ronawoul
dnev
erhur
tyourki
ds.
”
“Het hr
eatenedmesay i
nghewould.Hesai dhewi l
l
kil
lthem infr
ontofme.Acari salwaysf ol
lowing
them.It r
iedtoignorei
tbutIcan’
tanymor e.Iwentto
thepolicebuttheysaidIdon’
thaveevidence.Please
tal
kt oyourhusband.Don’tcometothehot el
but
j
ustt al
ktohim please.Idon’
twanttofightwithhim,
Iwoul
dbutnowmypr
ior
it
yismyki
ds.
”
“Ok.Pl easedel etethosepi ct
ures.Ican’tbel i
eveyou
tookt hem.Thosepi ctureswi l
lruinmymar r
iage.Kea
gokopaNat han.( Iam beggi ngy ouNat han.)Whydi d
youev entakepi ctures?Yousai dy oudidn’t…Ican’t
believeIlety oudot hattome.Ican' tbelieveI
trustedy ouenought obelieveitwheny ousai dthere
wasnoev i
denceoft hatnight.Koor eal
l alongy ou
wer ewai ti
ngf ortheper fecttimet obr i
ngt hisup.I
nev erknewIcoul dhat eaper sonthewayIhat eyou
ri
ghtnow. ”
“Iwasnevergoingtobringthem upthat’
swhyI
nevermentionedi
t.Iam sorryIeventookthe
pict
ures.I
twasstupid.Iwil
ldelet
ethem.”
“Ifeell
ikeyouarejustaft
ermyhappi ness.Ifyou
reall
ylovemet henyouwi l
lstopdoingthis.Youare
steali
ngawaymyhappi ness.Il
ovemyhusbandand
youwon’ tstopthi
s.Nextyouwi l
lbehav i
ngav i
deo
wheny ousai dyoudidn’
ttakeav i
deo.”
“
Ther
eisnov
ideo.Iswear
.”
“
Youar
ehur
ti
ngme.Can’
tyouj
ustacceptt
hatIam
mar
ri
ed?
”
“Ihave.Butmyki ds’
ssafetyalsocomesf i
rsttome
Kenny .Theydidn’
tdoanything.Theyshoul
dn'tbe
l
ivinginfearbecauseofsomet hingIdi
d.Wi l
lyou
tal
kt ohim?Pleasetalkt
ohi m.”
“
Ok.
”
“
Okby
e.”
“
Shar
p.”
Hehungupt henshedeletedthecallt
houghtf
ull
y
wonderi
ngifreal
l
yRonawoul ddoanythi
ngtohis
ki
ds.Shewalkedoutsi
de, Ronalookedatherand
wi
nked.Kennyshy l
ysmiledsitt
ingdownwiththe
l
adies.
Mialeanedov
erandwhi
sper
edt
oKenny
.“Thewi
tch
l
eft
.”
Kennyl
ookedar
oundt
hensi
ghed.“
ThankGod.
”
Miatookasipofherjuice.“
Someti
mesIjustwantto
punchherface.Ican’
tbeli
eveshedeni
edtouchi
ng
Rona…ij
a.”
Kennypi
ckedhergl
assofwi
nest
ari
ngatRonawho
washoldi
nghi
sphone.Herphonev
ibr
atedf
rom her
hands.
Husbae:
Shoul
dIki
ckt
hem outsowecanf
uck?
Kenyl
aughed.
Kenny
:Your
efused.I
t’
sfi
ne.
Husbae:Iam aholymanthesedays.Wenaobat
la
gonkisegosel
e.(Youwanttoleadmeastr
ay.
)
Kenny
:Mar
ri
edpeopl
ehav
esex.
Husbae:Nnakebat
lagosej
usi
wa.(
Iwantt
obe
seduced.
)
Kenny
:Wasn’
tmydr
essenough?
Husbae:
Nope.May
bei
fyout
ooki
tal
lof
f.
Kennyst oodupandwal kedinsidethehouse.She
tookof fhercl
othesthengrabbedhershortcleani
ng
uniform andubuttonedthefi
rstbut
tonsshowi ngher
cleavage.Shetiedadoeki nherheadthentooka
pictur
eandsenti ttohim.
Kenny
:Howaboutt
his?
Husbae:
Fuck!Wher
edi
dmywi
fego?
Kennygi
ggl
edf
eel
i
ngnaught
y.
Kenny
:Madam i
snother
esi
r.
Husbae:
Hol
don.
Kennyundi danotherbut
tonthensatonthebed.
Ronawal kedinsecondslaterandl
ookedather.Her
shortdressrevi
ewedhert hi
ghsandwi t
hherl
egs
sl
ightl
yopen, hecouldseeherpussy.Shest
oodup
star
ingathim ashewal kedoverwit
hasmi l
e.
“
Waremosadi
wameokae?(
Wher
edi
dyousaymy
wi
fewas?
)”
Shelookedathi
mi nnocent
lyandobedi
ent
ly.“
Shei
s
nothereMr.Motsamai.”
Ronastaredathershortdress,
hisdickcoul
dj ust
bursthi
spants.Hesobadwant edtogothrough
wit
hMr .Pil
ane’
sexerci
sebutst ar
ingatherlooking
athimli
kethatwasn’thelpi
ng.Alldi
rtyt
houghts
swam inhishead.
“
Kenny
-“
“Shhh.
.yourwif
eisnother
e.Maybei
fyou…tur
nme
aroundandfuckmehardandfast
,byt
hetimeshe
comesback,youwoul
dhavelongbeendone.No
onehastoknow.Itwi
l
lbeourdir
tyl
it
tl
esecret
.”She
sl
owlywentdownonherkneesandtookouthisdi
ck
fr
om hi
spants.
“
Youareonenaughtymai
d…i
fmywi
fef
indsout
,she
i
sgoi
ngtofi
reyou.”
“
Morereasonnott
ogetcaught
.Mr
s.Mot
samai
woul
dneverknow.
”
Shesmi
l
edt
hen#r
emov
ed.

Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#138
#r
emov
ed

Shesmi l
edthenshestrokedhim wit
hherhand.She
l
eanedov erandsuckedhisdick,
Ronalookedather
andfucktherewasalway ssomethi
ngabout
watchingMmaMot samai withhi
sdickdownher
thr
oat.Shegaggedonhi sdickwhil
emassaginghis
bal
ls.Ronagrunt
edweakl yasshewentonmov ing
f
ast
er,
hel
plessl
yhej
ustwat
chedher
.
Shegotupthenpushedhi
m onthebedandgoton
topofhi
m unbut
toni
ngherdresssohecoul
dstar
e
atherbr
easti
nthelacebr
a.
Sheheldhisdickupr i
ghtthensatoni tgaspingashe
str
etchedhiswayi n.Herwet nesscoatedhi m whi
le
herpussywr appeditsel
faroundhim.Shet ookall
of
i
tinandt ookasecondl etti
ngherselfadjust.Rona
puthishandsonherwai tbutKennyslappedt hem
off
.
“
Don’
ttouch.Justwat
ch…”
Sheroll
edupherdr esssohecoul dwat chthe
connection.Shestartedmov i
ng,goingupanddown
whil
emov ingherwaistincir
cularmot i
ons.Rona
l
ookedatherwaxedpussy ,i
tlookedsosmoot h.She
sl
owlyt ookallofhisdicki
nmoani ngsoftl
y.
Watchinghert akecontrol
li
ket hatalwaystur
ned
hi
m on.
Kennyputherhandsonhischestandbegun
bounci
ngonhim enjoy
ingthedi
ckshehadmi ssed
somuch.Hopefull
yshewouldstopgett
ingst
arved
now.Hegr untedbeneat
hherasshebounced,
her
breastshaki
ngwitheachbounce.
“
Fuckbabe!
”
Kennytookof fherbr eastf rom herbraandt ookhis
handsandmadehi m squeezeherasshecont i
nued
mov i
ngherwai stsucki nghi min.Ronal ookedatt he
connecti
onbet weent hem ashi sdickdisappearedin
andoutofherpussycov eredwithherwet ness.It
gotwayt oogoodheputhi shandsonherwai st
unabletoholdhimsel fany morethenhet hrustfrom
underneathknowi ngt heyhadt obequi ckandgo
backtot hei
rguest sout side.Hedrill
edherf r
om
beneath.Kennybi therlowerl ipnottomakemuch
noisebutitwast oogoodshemoanedt hrowingher
headback.
Heincr easedhi sspeedtappi
ngherevenmor e,he
wasnowf uckingherwaydeepertaki
ngbothoft hem
str
aightt oheav enHefuckedherhardert
il
lKenny
body’sst i
ffenedassheconv ul
sedcummi ngaround
hi
sdi ck.
“
OhRonaaaaa…awwwmhmmmm.
.”
“
Shhh…”
Hecontinuedwitht
het hust
sridi
ngherwaveof
pl
easureandf r
ozedeepi nheremptyi
nghisl
oad
deepinher.Kennycol
lapsedont opofhi
m br
eat
hing
heavi
l
y.
Ronakissedherf or
eheadsqueezingherass.He
tookamomentt henmov edherandgotup.He
changedhi spant
saf t
erwipi
nghisdickandlooked
atherallexhaust
edont hebedlookingt
horoughly
fucked.
“
Ourguest
sar
ewai
ti
ng.
”
“Nat
hancall
edme.Hewast hreat
eni
ngme.Idon’
t
wanttokeepany
thi
ngfrom you.Hesai
dhewantsto
seemeatC-SKYhotel
.”
“
Iwi
l
lhandl
eit
.”
Hespray
edabi
tofhi
sper
fumet
henr
eachedf
ort
he
door
.
“
Rona…”
Het
urnedt
oher
.“Yeah?
”
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
“
Heeel
amma,
Ilov
emywi
fe.
”
Kennylaughedashelaughedwal
kingout
.Herphone
vi
brat
ed,shereachedfori
tandopenedhi
smessage.
Husbae:
Ilov
eyout
ooMmaMot
samai
.
Kennyputthephonedownclosinghereyeswai
ti
ng
toregai
nherenergyandj
oineveryone.
.
.
.

Esiwalkedinsi
deherhouset henshelaiddowni n
herbedroom emotionall
ydrai
ned.Thesecr etwas
beginni
ngt odr
ivehermad.Sheknewt her eason
whynoonehadsai danythi
ngwast opr eservethe
brother
’srel
ati
onshipbutnowshewasj ustlivi
ngin
fearofKennytell
i
nghi m.
Shecouldn’
tevenful
l
yrelaxbecauseshewas
constant
lyt
hinki
ngofit
.Herphonerangfr
om besi
de
her.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey
.”
“
Sean?
”
“
Howar
eyou?
”
“
Fine.You?
”
“
Iwentf
oracheckupday
sback.Iam i
nfer
ti
le.You
wer
esoright
..
”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Ijustf
oundout
.If
eel
…If
eel
soweak.
”
“
Iam sor
ry.Iknowhowbadl
yyouwantachi
l
d.”
“
Shei
spr
egnant
.Shesay
sit
’soursecondchi
l
d.”
“
Iam r
eal
l
ysor
ry.
”
“
Idon’
tknowhowt
ofeel
.”
“
Iknowi
tmusthur
t.
”
“
Atleastyounev
erl
i
edt
ome.It
hinkImadea
mist
ake.”
“
Ithappens.Buty
oucanal
way
sadopt
.”
“
Ihaveal
way swant
edtohav
eki
dsofmyown.Is
t
hatwhythatti
meyousai
dwecanal
waysadopt
?’
Esi
sighedsadi
l
y.“
Yes.Iam sor
ry.
”
“
It
’sok.IguessIwasr
eal
l
yst
upi
d.”
“
No.Youwer
enotst
upi
d.”
“
Iwas.Ij
ustwant
edt
otel
lthaty
ouwer
eri
ght
.”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Isawy
ourpi
ctur
esonf
acebook.Congr
atul
ati
ons.
”
Esishookherhead.“
Remembermetell
ingy
ouabout
whathappenedwithMaat
la’
sbrot
herandme?”
“
Yes.Yousl
eptwi
thhi
m agai
n?”
“No.Hi swifeknows.Il
iveinfearev er
ysingleday.I
can’tevensleepbecauseIkeept hinki
ngshei sgoing
totellhim.Sheisalwaysthreat
eningme.Igeti tbut
nnaIcan’ tanymore.Ij
autwanttot ellhi
mt hetrut
h.”
“
Andcausef
ight
sbet
weenbr
other
s?”
“
Iam notfreeSean.I
t’
sthatt
hing…thatsecrett
hat
i
salwayslurki
ngbehi
nd.Maybei fKennydiedI
woul
drelaxbecauseIknowRonawoul dnevert
ell
him butknowingKenny,
onedayshewil
ltel
lhi
m.My
kidsaregoingtohateme.Thewhol
efamilyi
sgoi
ng
tohurtme.”
“
Soy
ouwantherdead?
”
“Yes!Asevi
lasthi
smaysound,
Iwishshecanjust
die.Shewil
ldi
ewitht
hesecr
ett
henandIwon’thave
towor r
yaboutany
thi
ng.
”
“
Arey
ouwi
l
li
ngt
othi
nkt
hatf
arf
orasecr
et?
”
“Sean,thissecrethaspot ent
ial
tor ui
nmyl ife.You
don’tunderstand.Iwilll
osemyki ds,myr espect,I
willl
oseMaat l
a.Hewi l
lhatehisbrother,
hecanev en
got otheextentofkill
inghisbrother.Maatlav al
ues
l
oy al
tyfrom hisbrothersandKennyj ustdoesn’ t
understandtheamountofdamaget hi
scancause. ”
“
NnaIdo.Igetwher eyouar
ecomingf r
om.Soy
ou
wantKennydead.Icanmakethathappen.
”
Esi
laughed.“
Mxm…Wenakana.
”
“No.Iam ser
ious.Icanmakei thappen.I
t’
snotabi
g
deal
.Shewi l
ldiewiththesecretandyouwon’
thave
toworryaboutanythingel
se.”
“
Stopf
ool
i
ngar
ound.Thi
sisnotamov
ie.
”
“
It
’snotbutIam tr
ainedf
orthi
s.Iwi
ll
takeheroutof
t
hegamef oryou.Butyouhavetodosomethi
ngfor
me.”
Shest
oppedsmi
l
ing.“
Seanst
opi
t.
”
“Iam ser
ious.YouwantKennydead,sayt
hewor
d.
ButIwouldwantsomet hi
nginr
eturn.
”
“
Sean…”
“Kennyi
sprobabl
ygoingt
otell
him oneday.You
sleptwi
thherman.Onewayortheother
,shewil
l
makesureMaatlafi
ndsoutj
usttohurty
ou.”
“
I…”
“Doyouwantt hat?Ofcauseify
oudon’tmi ndt
hen
i
t’sokbutifyouwantmet otakeherout,
y oucan
saythewor d.Butyouhavetodosomethingforme
i
nr et
urn.
”
Shepausedt
hought
ful
l
y.“
Whati
sit
?”
“
Doyouwantherdead?Iwi
l
lonl
ytel
lyout
hen.Do
y
ouwantKennydead?”
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#139

Esi
laughed.“St
opit.Idon’
twantt
oki
l
lheror
any
thing.Iam j
ustsaying.
”
“
Herdeat
hwoul
dmaket
hingsmucheasi
erf
ory
ou.
”
“No, i
twouldki l
lme.Myconsci ouswon’ thandl eit.
AsmuchasKennyandIar enott al
king,Isti
l
l love
her.Ilovehersomuch, shei s…shei smyonl yfriend
andi thadtakemet hi
st i
met oactuall
yreali
zet hat
shei stheonlyoneIhav eev erkeptinmycor ner .I
wishIcoul dtakebackt hehandsoft imeandundo
myact i
onsbutIcan’ t
.Itri
edt oapologizebutshe
doesn’twantt ohearit.Itpainsmet oknowt herei s
thi
shugebl ockbetweenusandIcan’ tseem toget
throughit.IdoubtIwillevergot hroughit.The
betrayalwasj ustt
oodeepbutInev ermeantt o
causeherpai n.Iam actuallygladshei swor king
thi
ngst hroughwi t
hRona.Ihav ealway swant ed
them together.Sheknowst hat.Iwast hei
rbiggest
fanandIst ill
am but…nowt hissecretit…Ijustwi sh
Icantel
lMaatl
aandifheisleav
ingmeIwil
laccept
i
tbutIdon’
twanttobet her
easonheandRona
fi
ght…Iam t
ir
edofli
vinginf
ear.”
“Sheisnevergoingtof or
givey ouforthat.Youslept
withthemanshel oveswhilemar r
ied.Howdoy ou
expecthertotrustyouorev enbegint oforgi
v et
hat?
May beifherandherhusbandwer enott ogether
anymoreshewoul dconsiderforgi
vingyou.”
Tearsfil
l
edEsi’
seyes.“Imi
ssourfri
endshi
p.Ihave
neverfel
tmorealonethannow.Ican’
tbeli
eveeven
aft
erthatI…Godwhatwaswr ongwithme? ”
Seansi ghed.“Youarehuman.Youmessup,
somet i
mesourmessupsar emuchbiggerand
greaterbutthat’
swhatmakesy ouhuman.Youwer e
drunkthatnight.Youbothweredrunk,Iknowwhat
alcoholandst r
esscandot osomeone.Ihavebeen
there.Don’tbeatyour
selft
oomuchf orit.
”
“
Iam scar
ed.Iam r
eal
l
yscar
ed.Maat
lawi
l
lki
l
lme.
”
“Moesi,
ok,Il
ied.Kennywouldnevert
ell
Maat l
a
becauseshelovesherhusband.Shewouldnever
ri
skhavingherhusbandkil
ledorhavi
nghisenti
re
familytur nhisbackonhi m.I fshecoul dkeepqui et
forthislongi tsimpl ymeansshei snev ergoi ngto
tel
lhim.Fami l
ysecr etsarear ealthi ngoutt here.Do
youknowt hatsomebr ot
her sarerai si
ngt heir
brother’schi l
drenthinkingt heyaret heirs?Some
evendi edr aisi
ngt heirbrother’schildrent hi
nking
theywer et heirs.Somesecr etscannev erseet he
l
ighttopr eservethepeacei nt hefami ly.Kenny
woul dnev err i
skthat .Whati sgetti
ngy oul i
kethisis
yourgui l
tconsci ous.Youar enotabadper son.You
havenev erbeenone.Youar etheni cestper sonI
haveev ermetandy ouarenotper fect.Youmessup.
Somet imesashumansweev enmaket hesame
mistaket wi cebutt hatdoesn’ tmakeusev i
l.I
t’
swhat
makesushuman. ”
Moesi
putherhandov
erhermout
hcr
ying.
“Theynevertol
dmef ri
endshipbreakupswasmor
e
painf
ulthatarel
ati
onshi
pbr eakup.
”
Seanlaughed.“Theywill
nevertel
lyoubutIknow
j
usthowpai nfult
hatis.I
thappenstousguyst oo.
Losingyourbestfri
endismuchmor epainf
ul t
han
l
osingagirl
fri
end.Iknowy ouandKennyhav ebeen
f
ri
endsf
oryears.Ir
emembert
henightwemetand
y
oucri
edforher…Iknowyoul
ovehersomuch.
”
“Ido.IwishIknewwhattodo.Iwantmyf
riendback.
IwishIknewwhatt odobutthedamagei
st oomuch.
Ican’tev
engetclosetoher
.”
“Somet hingst aketime.Li st
entomebei ngDr .Phi
ll
.
Hechuckl ed.“Somet hingstaketi
me.Gi veitti
me.
Onedayy ouwi llhavet hemomentt oreall
y
apol ogizeandmakeherseet hatyounevermeantt o
hurtheri nt hefirstplace.Onedayy ouwilltel
lheral
l
youhav eal wayswant edtotell
her.Onedayy ouand
herwi llhugi tout,andmay beyourfri
endshipwon’t
gobackt ohowi twer ebef or
ebuty ouwil
l have
clearedt heai r
.Onedayy ouwil
lhaveanor mal
conv ersationwi thherandact uall
ylaugh,youwill
l
ookatherandsmi lebecausenomat t
erwhat ,
sistersar eforlif
e.”
Moesi
rubbedhert
ear
s.“
Ihopeso.
”
“I
twil
ltaket
imebecauseit’
sjustnotaboutyou
sl
eepi
ngwi t
hherman.Yout wower einseparabl
e,
shetr
ustedyouwholehear
tedl
y.Shecoul dhaveput
herli
feiny ourhandsatsomepoi ntbecauset hat
’s
howmuchshet rust
edy ou.Youbetray
edheri nthe
worstpossi bl
emanner ,Iam sur
easmuchasy ou
aretryi
ngt oapologi
ze,sheishurti
ngev er
ytimeshe
seesy oubecausey ouwer emorethanjustar egul
ar
fri
end.Youwer ewaymor ethanthattoher.The
bondwi l
l neverbebrokenbutiti
sdamaged.I twill
takeforittobef i
xed.”
“
Youar
eri
ght
.”
“
Iam sor
ryf
orsuggest
ingweki
l
lher
.Itwasst
upi
d.”
Shechuckl
ed.“
Ican’
tbel
i
eveyouevensuggest
edi
t
butal
soIcan’
tbel
iev
eIevensai
dit
.”
Theybothl
aughed.“
Yeah,
youwon’
thandl
eher
deat
h.”
Moesismi
l
ed.“
Iwon’
t.Butwhatdi
dyouwanti
n
r
etur
n?”
“
Nah…not
hing.
”
“
Tel
lme.
”
“
Nothi
ngi
mpor
tant
.It
’sact
ual
l
yst
upi
dasIt
hinki
f
i
t.
”
“Ok.Sowhatarey
ougoi
ngt
odoabouty
our
sit
uati
onshi
p.”
“
Adopt
ingi
sact
ual
l
ynotabadi
dea.
”
“
It
’snot
.”
“
Iwi
l
llooki
ntoi
t.
”
“
Andy ourbabymama?Thatchi
l
dknowsy
ouasher
f
ather
.”
“Iam donewi
tht
hatwomanbutIam notgoi
ngto
abandonmydaught
er.Iwi
l
lbeherf
athersti
l
l.
”
“
Ok.Ihopey
ouf
indadeser
vingwomanoneday
.”
“Ihad,
Isawthi
sbeauti
fulgi
rll
ait
akabutsheis
someoneelse’
sproper
tyandthentomakemat ter
s
worseIact
uall
yfoundoutsheisKenny’
ssist
er.
”
“
Mia?
”
“
Theonewhoi
sbeaut
if
ulanddr
ivesawhi
teR7.
”
“Yes.That’
sMia.Shei
sbeauti
ful
,out
spoken,
str
aightfor
wardanddoesn’
tmindcall
i
ngany oneout
ontheirshi
t.Shei
sinarel
ati
onshi
pasf arasI
know.”
“I
fshewasn’tKenny’
ssisterIwasgoi
ngtosnatch
her.Imethermonthsbackt henbumpedi
ntoher
againsometimeback.Eish…”
Moesil
aughed.“St
ayawayf
rom Mi
awena.Shei
sin
aser
iousrel
ati
onship.
”
“
Buti
fIdat
eher
,woul
ditbeapr
obl
em?
”
“
Heeel
a!That
’smyf
ri
end’
ssi
ster
.”
Seanlaughed.“
Aker
eyouandKennyar
enol
onger
fr
iends?”
“
Wear e,wewi l
lalwaysbe.Nnamot hool
eketsal
a
y
ame.( Thatpersonismyf r
iend.
)Iam i
nthi
s
f
ri
endshipalone,Idon’
tcarebuteit
herway,
Bofel
ois
t
hei
rsister.KennyandBofeloshareafat
her
.”
“
Fuck!IknewIsawt
her
esembl
ance.
”
“
Yeahsoi
tmakest
hem si
ster
s.”
“
Butst
il
l….Nnankamot
saa.(
Icanst
il
lsnat
chher
.)
”
“Lesangwanar ra(Leavet
hechi
ld)andyouar
eway
toooldf orher
.Shemustbe26or27, somewher
e
there.Youareolderthanme.Ngng,fi
ndsomeone
elseanddoi tquick.
”
“
TlhammawenaIr
eal
l
yli
keher
.”
“St
ayawayfrom Miaand-”Moesipausedhear
ingt
he
dooropenandclose.“
Ihavetogo,sharp.
”
Shequickl
yhungupanddeletedt
hecal
lasMaat
la
walkedinhol
dingapl
atef
ullofmeat
.
“
Ibr
oughtsomef
ood.
”
Heputt heplatedownandsatbesi desher.“Ispoke
toRonaandhepr omisedhewi llhaveat al
kwi t
h
Kenny.Ihav enoticedhowt hisfi
ghty ouarehav i
ng
withheristakingsomuchf rom y ou.Youare
constantl
ybeggi nghertotalk.Ididn’tknowitwas
thatdeep,Ithoughtshewasangr ybecausey ou
didn’
tstandwi thhertheti
meshecheat edbutIam
getti
ngaf eeli
ngt hati
tismor ethant hat.
”
Tear
sfi
l
ledMoesi
’
sey
es.
“Iwishyoucant ellmewhat ’sgoi
ngonbuti t’
sokif
youf eel
it’
syourissuewi t
hKenny .Ronawi l
ltal
kto
hertheny outwowi llt
alkitout
.”Hesmi l
ed.“Iwant
ustogetmar ried.Idon’twanttobeaboy fri
end.Iam
toool df
orthatshit.YouandKennywi llbeineach
other’sf
acesmor eof t
ensonowi magineifyouare
fi
ghti
ng.RonaandIarebrother
sbabe.Wewillnever
separ
atenomat t
erwhat,heismybestfri
endas
muchashei smybr ot
herandit’
sreal
l
ypainf
ulthatI
can’
tenjoymybrother
’scompanybecauseofthe
fi
ghtbetweenourwomen.”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
It
’sok.Ronawi
l
ltal
ktoher
.”
Shenoddedbl
i
nki
ngawayhert
ear
s.Maat
laki
ssed
her
.
“
Eat
.”
Hegavehert
heplat
eoffoodandwal
kedoutt
oget
heradr
inki
nthekit
chen.

*
**

LateronAtsi
lepar
kedt
hecaratt
hemal
l
.Apr
ilt
ook
offherseat
belt
.
“
Iam comi
ng.
”
“
Don’
tyouwantmet
ocomewi
th?
”
“
Noi
t’
sok.
”
Shest eppedoutandwalkedinsidethemallwhil
e
Atsil
est ar
edathert
hickbehindpackedinthejeans.
Sheputonhershades.At sil
esteppedoutasaman
wav edatherwithasmilethenhewal kedoverand
heldherhand.
“
Uhu.
.”
“
Iwi
l
lcomewi
thy
ou.
”
“
Ij
o!Iam get
ti
ngi
nthephar
macyt
ogett
hemedi
cine
f
orthebaby.
”
Shewalkedinsi
deashel ookedatt
hejewel
lerystor
e.
Hewalkedinandl ookedatacoupleofthi
ngst i
l
lhe
cameacrossabr acelet
.Theshopassist
antlooked
athi
m withasmile.
“
Looki
ngf
orany
thi
ngi
npar
ti
cul
ar?
”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Yes,
somet
hingf
ormywi
fe.
”
Theshopassist
antpointedatawatch.“Thatcanbe
somethi
ngshewi l
ll
ike.Amanj ustcamein,he
wantedtogetsomethingforhi
sgirl
fri
end,helooked
att
hatforalongwhilethenwalkedout.Myguessi s
thathewentgetthemoneysohecangrabi
t.I
t’
s
beauti
ful
isn’
tit
?Imagi
neitonherhand.
”
“
It
’sbeaut
if
ul.
”
“Nowimagi
net
hatmant
aki
ngi
tbef
ore…uhher
ehe
comes.
”
“
Iwanti
t!
”
Theshopassi
atntl
aughed.“
It
’sy
our
s.”
Atsi
l
egreet
edthemanast
heshopassi
stncet
ook
outthewat
ch.
“Ereki
lwenemysi
ster
?(Hasi
tbeenboughtmy
sist
er?
)”
“
Yes.Thi
smant
ooki
t.
”
Themanl
ookedatAt
sil
ewi
thasmi
l
e.“
Aoobr
a
yaka!
”
At
sil
elaughed.“
Har
dymf
ethu!
”
“
Ahhhbr
ayaka!
”
“
Got
lasi
ama.
”
At
sil
epai
dthenwal
kedoutj
ustasApr
ilwal
kedout
oft
hephar
macy
.Theywal
kedt
othecarandgoti
n.
“
Igoty
out
his.
”
Apri
ltookt
hesmal
lboxandopenedi
t.Shesmi
l
ed
st
ari
ngatthewat
ch,hermout
hwideopen.
“
Atsi
l
e!Howmuchwast
his?
”
“
Tryi
ton.
”
Apr
ilputi
tonherwr
ist
.
“
Wow!
”
“
Youl
i
kei
t?”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
It
’sbeaut
if
ul.Il
ovei
t.Thanky
ou.
”
Heleanedov
erandki
ssedherasshebl
ushed
happi
ly.

*
**

Nate’
ssatont
hebedt
alki
ngwi
thhi
sfr
iendont
he
phone.
“
Eishl
ait
aka,
whatar
eyougoi
ngt
odonow?
”
“Idon’tknow, Ihopeshetalkst ohim andifshe
doesn’t,Iam goingtogoandt alktohim.Totaif
thereisany oneheshouldbeat t
ackingitshoul
dbe
menotmyki ds.Ifhecont
inuest henlennaIwil
l
retal
iate.Iknowhehast ri
plets,imagineifonewere
togomi ssing.
”
“
Nat
edon’
tli
ket
hat
.”
“LennaIcanatt
ackandter
rori
zehiski
ds.Myki
ds
didn’
tdoanythi
ngtohi
m.Itjustshowshowweakhe
i
st oevenai
mf ormykids.
”
“
Whati
fit
’snothi
m?”
“
Whoel
secani
tbei
fnothi
m?”
“Ithinkeversincey outoldt henannyt obeont he
l
ookout ,l
eeneshei spar anoid.KanajustlastweekI
sawherwi t
htheki dsatthemal l
,Iwentafterhert
o
greether ,poorthingli
terall
yranwi ththekidsand
whenIcaughtupwi t
hhershesai dshet houghti
t
wassomeonet r
yingtohar mt hem.KanaNkemi is
human, poorthingisfreakingoutbecausey ou
i
nst all
edfeari nher.Thereispr obablynoone
fol
lowi ngher ,
howmanybl ackcar sdowehav emo
Botswanaandi fRonawantedt odosomet hing,don’t
youthinkhewoul dhavedonei tbynow?Youar e
playi
ngwithfi
re,leavet
hatguyandhi sfamilyalone.
LegoneIcan’tbeliev
eyoutookpi cturesofthatnight,
koorehowt wist
edar eyouthatyout akepicturesof
herwhilehavi
ngsexwi thherorar eyouplanningt o
usethem againstheroneday ?
”
“Iwouldnev
erdothat
.ThereasonIneverev
en
broughtt
hatupi
sbecauseIneveri
ntendedtouse
them.”
“Youareplayi
ngwi
thfir
e.Thatguyhasbeenqui
et,
youareprovoki
ngaresti
ngsnakeandwhenit
att
acksitwil
l-
“
“
Rastawee,
ther
eisaknockatt
hedoor
.Wewi
l
l
t
alk.
”
“
Deletethosepictur
esMister
.Thosepict
uresar
e
yoursi
gnaturesigni
ngyourowndeath.Youdon’
t
messwithpeopl e’
swiv
esand-“
“I
t’
sonlyone.Ther
estar
ejustf
rom t
hatoneand
edi
ted.
”
“
What
everi
tmaybe.Del
ete.
”
“
Sur
e.Letmeat
tendt
othedoor
.”
Hehungupandopenedt
hedoor
.Ronapunchedhi
m
andwal
kedi
n.
“
Soyoust
il
lhav
ethegut
stocal
landhar
assmy
wi
fe?
”
Het
ookouthi
sgun.
“
Didn’
tIt
ell
yout
orunf
araway
?”
.
.
Dol
eav
eal
i
keandacomment
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#140

Ronawalkedf
urt
heri
nandcl
osedt
hedoorhol
ding
thegun.
“
Otl
i
legony
ela.
”
Nat
elookedathi
mthenthegunwit
hafrown,
wasn’
t
hesupposedt
obecri
ppl
ed?Therewasali
mpinhi
s
wal
kbutheseemedperf
ectl
yfi
ne.
Natetookadeepbr
eat
hfi
ght
ingt
okeepbr
ave.“
You
ar
enotgoingtodoany
thi
ngt
ome.Youwil
lgoto
j
ail
.”
“Jai
l?Forwhati
fnoonehasevidence?Youdon’
t
knowmeorwhatIam capableofmmehel aIam
abouttoshowyou.Wher
edoy ougetthenervet
o
call
mywi fe?
”
“
Ijustwantedhert
otalktoyou.Mister,i
fyouwant
t
oki l
lme,goahead.Atthi
spointIreall
ydon’tcar
e
whatyoudobutstayawayf r
om myki ds.Lesago
t
errori
zabanabaka.Mykidsdidnothingtoyou.I
l
ongstayedawayfr
om yourwi
febutIdon’tknow
whatyouaret
ryi
ngtodowheny oukeepfoll
owing
af
termykids.
”
Ronafrownedconfused.“
Obuakaeng?(
Whatar
e
youtal
kingabout
?”
“Icall
edKennyt otell
hertotell y
outoleavemyki ds
outofourfi
ght s.Iknowy ouhav ebeenhav i
ngt hem
foll
owed.I
fany thi
nghappenst omychi l
drenIam
goingtoknowi t’
sy ouandIam goi ngtoretal
iate.I
knowIwaswr ongt ogoaf t
ery ourwif
eandIhav e
keptmydistancebecauseIr espectherenought o
l
istenwhenshesay sstayawayf r
om me.Leav emy
kidsoutofourf i
ghts.
”
“Wat senwa?( Ar
ey oucrazy?)WareIhavepeople
fol
lowi ngaft
eryourkids?Otlanyel
atlhemonna.
War engnaar e?Whywoul dIhaveyourkidsfoll
owed
around?I fIwantedtodosomet hi
ngtot hem Iwoul
d
havel ongdoneit.”
“
Sowhoel
secanbe-
“
“
Idon’tknowandIdon’
tgiveafuck.Idon’
tcar
e
whathappenstoy
ourchil
dren.Yourchi
ldr
enarenot
myissue.HadIwantedt
odoany t
hingt
othem I
wouldhavelongdonei
t,t
heywouldbehi
stor
yby
now.”
Nat
elookedathim.“Yousai
dyouweregoi
ngto
t
ort
urethem assoonasyoustar
tedwal
ki
ng.”
Ronachuckledst
ari
ngathi
mt henhecockedthe
gun.“Well
nowIam walki
ng.Weshouldgetthepar
ty
star
ted.
”
Nat
e’shear
tski
ppedasRonapoi
ntedt
hegunathi
m.
“Ihav
ebeenquiet
,Ireal
l
ythoughtIwoul
dleti
tgo
butyouar
egoingfarnow.”
“
Look,
Iam j
ustawor
ri
edpar
ent
.”
“
Ohnowy ouar
egoingtobewor
ri
edi
nhel
l
.Oseka
war
a,i
thasasil
encer
.”
“Iam sorryforcal
li
ngKenny .Iwouldhavenever
call
edheri fi
twasn’tser
ious.Ihavenotcall
edherin
mont hs.Iam sorr
yfordisr
espectingyourmarri
age.
Ifyousayy ouarenottheonet hen-“
“
Apol
a.(
Undr
ess.
)”
“
Eng?(
What
?)”
“Kareapol a.(Isaidundress.
)Iam notstammering.
Youhav eballstocallmywi feandharassher
threateningher ,
youshoul dhavethegutstogetyour
clothesof fbecausey ouaregoingtohandlewhat’s
aboutt ohappen. ”
“
Whatar
e-“
“Iam goi
ngt
oshootyouify
oudon’
tdowhatIam
sayi
ng.Apol
a.(
Undr
ess.)
”
“
Iam notgoi
ngt
obey
ourwhor
e.I
’
drat
herdi
e.”
Ronashotthepi
l
lowonthebedmi ssi
nghi
m byan
i
nch.Nate’
shear
tpoundedsohardashelookedat
wheret
hegunhadpassedthrough.
“Nextti
meIam notgoi
ngtomiss.Apol
aandodi r
e
kabonako.(Undr
essanddoitf
ast.
)Mywi f
eishome
waiti
ngforme.Ihat
ekeepi
ngherwaiti
ng.Takeof
f
every
thi
ng.”

*
**

Kennypacedar
oundherbedr
oom st
ari
ngather
phone.Tell
i
nghimtookofftheloadofwei ghtonher
shoulder
sbutnowshewaswor ri
ed.Whati fhedi
d
somet hi
ngthenwentt
ojail
?Shewoul dn’thandl
e
that
.HerdooropenedthenSaronawal kedin.
“MamaWawadoesn’twantt
opl
aywi
thme.She
saysshewant
stowatchTV.
”
“
Tel
lherIsai
dsheshoul
dpl
aywi
thy
ou.
”
“
Shei
sgoi
ngt
oref
use.
”
“
Whydon’
tyouwantt
owat
chTv
?Wher
eisLar
ry?
”
“
Heisal
sowat
chi
ngTV.Theydon’
twantt
opl
aywi
th
me.
”
“
Come.
.”
Kennytookherhandandledhert
oQ’ sr
oom.She
openedthedoorandfoundhi
m doinghi
m ar
twork.
“
Q,Ibr
oughty
oucompany
.”
Qt
urnedt
ohi
syoungersi
sterandsmi
l
ed.“
Hey
..
”
“
Theydon’
twantt
opl
aywi
thher
.”
“Shecanplaygamesonmyphone.”Qgoti
pthen
pickedherupandpl
acedheront
hebedhandi
nghis
si
sterhi
sphone.
“
Playgames.
”
Sar
onasmiledexci
tedl
ythenKennyl
ookedathi
s
work.Hewasactual
lygoodwit
hthepenci
l.
“
Wow!Thatl
ooksgood.
”
Qsmi
l
ed.“
Yes,
myar
tteachersai
dso.
”
“
Ili
kei
t.Keepi
tup.
”
“Thanks.Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.Yourhai
rst
ylel
ooks
sick!
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Wel
lthanky
ou,
whatdoessi
ck
mean?”
“
Itl
ookspr
ett
y.”
“
Ok.Thanks.
”
Kennywalkedoutofthebedr
oom andwentout
side
wit
hherphonedi al
i
nghim.Thephonerang
unanswer
edt henshehungupworri
edl
y.

*
**
Miawai t
edinthecarasOr awal kedinsidehi s
secondbabymama’ shouset ocoll
ecthi sdaught er
.
Shegotherphoneandkeptbusyonherf acebook
ti
meline.Minut
eswentby ,thi
rtyminutesl atershe
l
ookedatt hehouseandhewasst i
llnoty etout.She
hadmett hisbabymamat hri
cenowandasf aras
sheknew, shehadnoat t
itudejustthatshewast oo
fr
iendlywit
hOr a.Shecal
ledhimt henf r
owned
star
ingathisphonei nt
hecar .
Shecal
l
edhersi
ster
.“Hel
l
o?”
“Orahasbeeni nhi
sbabymama’shousef
orover
thi
rtyminutesnowthoughwej
ustcametocol
l
ect
hisdaughter.
”
“
Didy
oucal
lhi
m?”
“Thephoneisi
nthecar
.Whatpossi
blycoul
dtheybe
discussi
ng?
”
“
May
bet
hechi
l
d’st
hings.
”
“
Isi
twr
ongt
onotf
eel
comf
ort
abl
ewi
thi
t?”
“
NobutOr
aseemsl
i
keagoodguy
.”
“
Iam goi
ngt
oknock.
”
“
Don’
tcausedr
ama.
”
“
Iwon’
t.
”
Shehungup, mor eminuteswentby,shestepped
outofthecarandwalkedov ertot
hedoorthen
knocked.Shecouldactuall
yheart
heTV.She
knockedagainthentr
iedopeningthedoorbutitwas
l
ocked.
“
Ora!
”
Sheknockedforacoupleofminutest
henwalked
backtothecar.Secondsl
aterOr
awalkedoutthen
goti
nthecar.
“
Sor
ry,
Sam i
snotf
eel
i
ngwel
l
.”
Mi
alookedatt
het i
me.“
Youhav
ebeeni
nsi
def
or
mor
ethan45mi nut
es.
”
“Iwaswai
ti
ngf
orhert
osl
eep.Shedi
dn’
twantmet
o
go.”
“
Whywast
hedoorl
ockedt
hen?
”
“
Thedoorwasl
ocked?
”
“Thedoorwaslockedanditwouldn’
thav
ehur tyou
tocomeoutandt el
lmethatohMi a,mydaughteri
s
sick,
Iam t
ryi
ngtogethertosleep.
”
“
Comeonbabe…”
“
It
’sok.Takemehome.
”
“
Ongadi
l
e?(
Arey
ouangr
y?)
”
Miasmi
led.“Angr
yatyouforwhat?Forspendi
ng
t
imewit
hy ourdaught
er?Iam notangr
y.Pl
easetake
mehome.”
“
Iam sor
ry,
Ishoul
dhav
etol
dyou.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
“Byt
heway ,Fi
fiwasthi
nki
ngwetakeSam t
o
Okavangodelt
aforherbi
rt
hday
.”
“
Ok.
”
Or
alookedatherdr
ivi
ng.
“
Babey
ougood?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Youdon’
tsoundok.RememberwhatIsai
dabout
communi
cat
ion?
”
“
Iam f
ine.
”
Hedr
ovet
oherhouse.“
Whatdoy
out
hink?
”
“
Takeyourdaught
erwher
eyouseef
it
.Iam sur
eshe
wi
ll
li
keit
.”
Hepar
kedt
hecari
nhery
ard.
“
Bye.
”
Oralockedt
hedoors.“
Iam sor
rythatIdi
sappear
ed
i
nsidethehousef
orminut
eswi t
houtaler
ti
ngyou.”
“Stopapologi zingforspendingti
mewi thyour
daughter.Youdi dwhaty ousawf i
tatt hemoment
andnnaIwon’ tsayanythingbecauseIam notgoi ng
tobelabelednames.Spendt i
mewi thy ourdaughter,
l
ocky ourselfinsidethehousewi thy ourbabymama
who’srel
at i
onshi pIstil
ldon’tunderstand.Goon
tri
pswithherandy ourchil
d.Iwill
nev erunderstand
thethi
ngsy oudobecauseIdon’ thav eachi l
d.Ijust
thoughtmay beIdeser vedabitofrespectbutI
doubtsoi t
’sok.Pl easeunl ockyourdoor s.Iam tir
ed
Iwanttosl eep. ”
“
Miaweeh?
”
“Iam notgoi ngt ostandbet weeny ouandwhaty ou
wantt odo.Ihav ebeenwonder ingwhyi sitthatyou
arealway sjumpi ngbet weent heset wowomen,
Natashahasnopr oblem wi t
hFi fibecausei nher
eyesFifiishersi st
erwi fe.It’sokwi thheri fyouar e
withhersamewayi t
’sokf orFi fwheny ouar ewi t
h
her.Ebil
et othem i t
’snor mal t
oj ustshar ey oulike
thatbuty ouhav emadet hebi ggestmi stakei nyour
l
ifetothinkIwoul dentertaini t.Iam notgoi ngt obe
playedforaf ool myni gga, ifthisi sthegamey ou
wantt oplayt heny ouhav emett hemast erofi t
.I
real
lythoughtIwoul dgiv emy sel fafairshotatl ove
buthelathedi sr
espectar oundher eisr eal
.Unl ock
thedoors. ”
“
Babewhatar
eyousay
ing?
”
“Iam say
ingunlockt
hedoor
,Iwantt
ogeti
nmy
houseandsleep.”
Sheleanedov
erandunlockedthensteppedout
.She
goti
nherhouselocki
ngbehindherthencall
ed
Kenny.
“
Whathappened?Di
dyi
utal
ktohi
m?”
“Orajustl
ockedhimsel finsidethehousewi thhis
babymamaf ormorethan45mi nutesKenny .He
comesoutwi thalousyst oryyamydaught eri snot
feel
ingwell.Iknowbefor eIcamei ntothepi ctur
ehe
wasf ucki
ngbot hwomen, ifhethi
nksIam j ustgoing
tostayandbeghi m, hethoughtwr ong.Hecango
andshov ehisdickwher et hesunshines.Iam t i
red
ofthis.
”
“
Whati
fhi
sdaught
erwasr
eal
l
ysi
ck?
”
“
Andhefai
ledt
otel
lme?Iam notgoingtoignor
e
r
edfl
agsandbeunder
standi
ng.Iam done.
”
“
Mia…”
Tear
sfi
ll
edMia’seyes.“
Hedoesn’
trespectmeso
whyshoul
dIstay?”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
It’
sok.Ei
therwayIj
ustknewhewast
oogoodt
obe
t
rue.Iwi
ll
bef i
ne.
”
“
Sor
ry.Ir
eal
l
yli
kedhi
m.”
“
Met
oo.
”
*
**

Peosatwi
thherhusbandi
nthei
rbedr
oom wat
chi
ng
amovieonthel
aptop.
“Babe,am It
heonl
ywhonot
icedt
hatKennyandEsi
arefi
ghti
ng?”
Lebi
tsoshookhi
shead.“
Idi
d.”
“
Isawthem i
nthekit
chenandIam t
ell
ingyouBabe,
t
heyar
ef i
ght
ingoverEsi
touchi
ngRona’sdi
ck.
”
“
Shedi
dn’
ttouchhi
sdi
ck.
”
“Shemusthave.KennyandEsi
wer
emor
ethanj
ust
close.I
t’
saboutt
hat.
”
“
RonasaysEsi di
dn’
ttouchhi
sdi ck.Gapeeven
Wazhasaidi
t,shedidn’
tseeproperly
.Ift
hat’
swhat
t
hefighti
saboutthenKennyisjustbeingpet
ty.
”
“Butbabedon’
tyouthi
nkit
’sali
tt
leweir
djusthow
Bofel
ocamewi t
hherhusbandandweal lactedasi
f
shewasn’tMaatl
a’
sside?Tot
ahelaIfeelforEsi
.
I
magineyourfr
iend’
ssisterbeingther easonyour
marri
agehadendedinthef i
rstplace?NnaIwoul dn’
t
handl
eit
.Thentherei
sMi awhocan’ thideherhatr
ed
towar
dsEsi.Ir
eall
ydon’tli
kethatgirl.
”
“
Why
?”
“
Ahht
her
eisj
ustsomet
hingaboutherIdon’
tli
ke.
”
“
Miai
sni
ce.
”
“Sheli
kesfl
ir
ti
ngalot.Shedoesn’
tknowboundar
ies.
Thereisati
meIsawhert ouchAtsi
le’
schest
l
aughing.I
twasinappropr
iat
e.”
“
Somepeopl
ear
ejustl
i
ket
hat
.”
“
No.Thatonei
sawhor
e.”
“
Comeon…”
“
Iam ser
ious.
”
Theycoupl
econt
inuedgossi
pingwhi
l
ewat
chi
ngt
he
movie.

*
**
Ronawal kedinsi
dehisbedroom lateronand
openedhi ssafewhereheputhisguni nsi
deand
cl
osedit.Het ookoffhi
st-
shirtasKennywal ked
fr
om thebat hr
oom withatowel wrappedaroundher
wetbody .Helookedatherwetf acethenwalked
over
.
“
Hey
..
”
“RonaIhopey oudidn’
tdoanyt
hingthatwi
lll
endyou
i
nj ail
.It
oldyoubecauseIwanttokeepthe
transpar
encyinourmarri
agenotforyoutoactual
l
y
got ojai
l
.”
Het i
lt
edherj
awandki
ssedher
.“Noonei
sgoi
ngt
o
j
ail
.”
“
Ok.
”
“
Hewon’
tev
erbot
hery
ou.
”
“
Ok.
”
Ronawalkedtot
hebathroom wher
ehet ooka
shower,
hewashedhisdickmorethanheusall
ydi
d
befor
ewalki
ngoutandjoini
nghiswif
einbed.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#141

Thef ol
lowingmor ni
ngMiafi
nishedhernatural
facebeatandt ookamomentst ar
ingatherfaceon
themi r
ror.Tearsfi
ll
edherey
esbutshebl i
nkedthem
away .
“
Wedon’
tcr
yforusel
esst
hings.
”
Shegotupandputonherheel sthengr abbedher
thi
ngsandwal kedtothekitchenwher eshet ookher
peppermintteaandwal kedout.Shel ookedatOr a
parkedbesideshercar.Hehadnev erleftbutjust
keptknockingonherdoort hewhol eni ghtli
kea
crazyman.Sheclickedhert ongueunl ockinghercar
wakinghim up.Heopenedhi seyesandwat chedher
asshegoti nhercar.Hequicklysteppedout .
“
Babe…pl
easel
et’
stal
k.”
“
Ihav
etogot
owor
k.”
Hepul
l
edheroutoft
hecar
.
“
List
en…Iwoul
dnev
ersl
eepwi
thFi
fiwhi
l
eyouar
e
outsi
dewaitingforme.Iwouldneverdi
srespectyou
tothatl
evel.Ihonest
lywasgetti
ngSam tosleep,
shewasn’tfeeli
ngwell.Iwasinherr
oom withher,I
thi
nkFif
ilockedthedoort ospi
teyouorsomet hi
ng.
”
“
Whatdi
dIsay
?”
“Iam al
sosorryfornott
ell
i
ngyout hatsheissick.I
shoul
dhav ecomeoutandt ol
dy ou.Iam real
lysorr
y.
Ireal
i
zemymi st
akebutIwasn’tcheatingIswear.
AndIactuall
ywanty out
ocomewi t
hf orthetr
ip.
”He
huggedherresti
nghisheadonherbr east.
“
Iam sorry.I
twill
neverhappenagainIpromise.I
t
wasdisrespect
fulandIhaveleantmylesson.
I
ntswarelebabe.(For
giv
emebabe. )”
“
Ora,
Ihav
etogot
owor
k.”
“Ir
eallyl
ov eyouMi a.Ilacknot hi
ng,Ihavenor eason
tojumpi ntobedwi thFifiwhenIhadsexwi thyou
j
ustmi nutesbefore.Kanababet hinkaboutit…we
hadsexwhenwegott omyhousef r
om yoursister’
s
house.Whywoul dIhav esexwi t
hFifiwhenIjustgot
served?Iknowy oudon’tlikethefactthatIhavet wo
babymamas, lennaIdon’ tli
keitbecausenowl ook
whatIhaveyouthi
nki
ng.Iam notcheat
ingIswear
.
Babewecanaskt hechi
ld…shehasnor easont
oli
e.
WhatshouldIdotomakey ousee?”
Hewentdownonhi
sknees.“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“Getup.Gaker atedigameny anatseo.(Idon’tl
ike
suchgames. )Ify ouf
eelyouwantt ogobackt oy our
regularpussies, goaheadbutr el
easeme.Iam not
goingt obehur tunnecessari
l
ybecausei fyoutryitI
willhurtyousomuchwhenIam donewi thyou,you
willcommi tsuicideandIwillcrytheloudestaty our
funeral.
”
“
Ok.Iam sor
ry.
”
Hegotupthenkissedher
.Mi
akepti
tbr
ieft
hengot
backi
nhercar.
“
Ihav
etogot
owor
k.”
“
Ok.Iwi
l
lbr
ingy
oul
unchl
ateron.
”
“
No,
Ial
readyhav
emyl
unchpr
eor
der
ed.
”
“
Ok.
.Il
ovey
ou.
”
Shestar
tedhercart
hendr
oveof
frol
l
ingupher
windows.
*
**

Maatl
aparkedt
hecaratEsi
’
swor
kpl
acet
henshe
ki
ssedhi
m.
“
Ok.Lat
er.
”
“
Bye…”
Shesteppedoutandwal kedinsi
depushingher
bumpi nside.Maat
ladr
ov eawayreachi
ngforhi
s
phonet henhecall
edhi
sf at
her.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Papa,
didy
ougetmymessage?
”
“
Yes.Youwantt
omar
ryheragai
n?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Soy
oucangetdi
vor
ced?
”
“
Aowpapa?
”
“
WhatcanIsay?Til
lyoul
ear
nhowtorespectthe
womaninyourl
if
eyouwil
lal
waysgetdi
vorced.You
shoul dn’tbecheat i
ngint hef i
rstplace,it
’sallabout
respect .Youneedt or especty ourwomanenough
nottogetherhur tbyy ouract i
ons.Idon’tencour age
cheat ingmmey oukeept hatnonsenseawayf rom
yourwi fe.Yourwi f
eshoul dbeagl ass,youpr otectit
withev eryt
hingy ouhav e.SeeRona, hei snotper fect
butwhatInot icedi sthat, hewi l
lprotecthiswi f
eno
mat terwhat .Hewi l
lstandf orhiswife,hewi l
lstand
withhi swi feandhewi l
lchoosehi swifenomat ter
what .Theent iref amil
ycanhat eherm hisown
mot hercanhat eherbuthewi l
lstandwi thKeneilwe.
Hewi llprotectherf r
om nonsense.That ’
showi t
shoul dbebutasf oryou, yougot otheext endof
evenhav i
ngchi ldrenout sidey ourmar ri
age.”
“
Ilear
ntmyl
esson.
”
“Ihopeso.Sowhendoy
ouwantt
ogetev
ery
thi
ng
start
edon?”
“
Assoonaspossi
ble.Idon’
tli
kebei
ngaboy
fri
end.
”
“
Nooneaty
ourageisaboyf
ri
end.I
t’
sonlyyou.Let
met
alkt
oyouruncl
es.Howmuchdoy ouhave?”
Maat
lal
aughed.“
Ihav
eP60k.
”
“Good,
aft
erwhaty
oudi
dyoushoul
dbewi
l
li
ngt
o
pay.
”
“
Iam wi
l
li
ngt
opay
.”
“
Good.
”
Hi
sfat
herdr
oppedt
hecal
l
.Maat
lacal
l
edhi
sbr
other
.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Ispoket
opapa.
”
Ronalaughed.“
Andwhatdidhesay
?Idon’
tli
ke
cal
li
nghim anymor
ebecauseIal
waysgetl
ectur
ed.
”
“
Hesai
dal
ot.Buthemadesense.
”
“
Heal
way
sdoes.
”
“Anyways,
didy
out
alkt
oKemnyaboutt
het
ri
ptoVi
c
Fall
s?”
“
Noty
et.
”
“Youshouldtalktoher,agrouptri
pisalwaysthe
bestespecial
l
ynowt hatwewillbealotthoughIam
notsureaboutBof el
oandherhusband.Enet he
husbandiscool butIdon’twanttomakeEsi
uncomfortabl
e.”
“Esiwi
ll
justhavetodealwit
hitbecauseBof
elo’
s
husbandhasalreadyconf
ir
medt ocomingandhe
alr
eadydeposit
edt hemoney.
”
“
Eishok.
”
“
Yeah,
wewi
l
ltal
k.”
“
Sur
e.”

*
**

Tshenolol
ookedatPusoatt
heguesthouseashe
dressedup.
“
Babe,t
hoseguy
saresocool
.Whydi
dn’
tyou
i
ntr
oducemesooner
?”
Tshenol
olaughed.“
Theyar
e.”
“
Ican’
twai
tfort
hatt
ri
p.”
“
Whenar
ewegoi
ngagai
n?”
“
Int
woweekst
ime.
”
“
Howmuchar
ewecont
ri
but
ing?
”
“
Theguy
sar
epay
ingf
ort
het
ri
p.”
“
Howmucheach?
”
“
Don’
twor
ryaboutt
hat
.HowdoIl
ook?
”
Nol
osmi
l
ed.“
Youar
egoi
ngt
onai
lthepr
esent
ati
on.
Heki
ssedher
.“Thanks.
”
Hetookouthiswal
l
etandgav eherhi
scard.“You
wi
lldosomeshopping.Pl
easedon’tf
orgetAndrea’
s
gi
ft
.Shewill
kill
me.”
Tshenol
olaughed.“
Ok.
”
Hewalkedoutasshethr
ewher
sel
font
hebed
r
eachi
ngforherphone.

*
**

April
tookapi ct
ureofherwatchonherwr i
sti
nher
off
ice.Shesmi l
edpostingi
tonherinstagram wi
tha
capti
onof‘ whenhubbysurpri
sesyouwi ththi
s
beauti
fult
hing.Ilov
emymany a’
ll
,chronicl
esof
bei
ngMr s.Mot samai.
’Sherai
sedherheadatt he
sof
tknockonherdoor
.TheCOOwal
kedi
nand
smil
ed.
“
Hey
…goodt
ohav
eyoubackher
e.”
“
Thanky
ou.I
t’
sgoodt
obeback.
”
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
Shelookedathim,hehadal
wayshadaminicr
ush
onherthatshealwaysbr
ushedof
fbutnowshewas
get
ti
ngannoy ed.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Helaughed.“Ishouldtakeyououtforl
unchsome
t
ime,youwer emi ssedaroundher
e.Iwil
ltel
lyoual
l
t
hegossipy oumi ssed.
”
“
Waai,
nnaIam notagossipper
sonsoi
tcanmiss
meandei
therway,Idon’
thavel
unchwi
thanyman
whoi
snotmyhusband. ”
“
Whathedoesn’
tknowwon’
tki
l
lhi
m.”
Shefrownedathowcasuallyhejustsaidit
.“Il
ove
andrespectmyhusband.Ifit
’syourhabitt
osleep
wit
hmar ri
edwomen, keepthathabbitfarf
rom me.I
am notoneofthosewomen, pleaseleavemyoffi
ce
bef
oreIgetdi
srespectf
ulbutIwil
lal
ertMr.Mar
abi
,I
am sur
eHRwi l
lcontactyou.Thankyou.
”
“
Apr
il
-“
“
Youcancl
oset
hedoorony
ourwayoutsi
r.
”
“
Yougotal
lthi
smi
sunder
stood-
“
“Don’
tworr
y.Iam sur
etheywill
giveusbot
ha
chancet
oexplai
n,hopef
ull
ythecameraherei
s
worki
ngandhavecaptur
edev er
ythi
ng.
”

*
**

Kennywalkedi
nsi
deherof
fi
ceinafor
mal dr
ess
thensatdownpi
cki
ngherr
ingi
ngphone.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
MmaMot
samai
,ther
eissomet
hingIf
orgott
otel
l
y
ou.
”
“
What
?”
“
Sot
heguy
sandIpl
annedat
ri
ptoVi
cFal
l
s.Ar
oad
t
ri
p.”
“
Youar
egoi
ngt
oVi
cFal
l
s?”
“
Yes,
allofus.I
ncl
udingyouandt
heladi
es.Iknow
y
ouaregoingtohatethi
sbutMaat
laisal
socoming
t
oget
herwithEsi
.”
“
Ombor
elangt
ota?(
Whyar
eyoubor
ingme)
”
“
Iam sor
rybabebutther
eisnot
hingwecando.I
t
hinkMaatl
aalsowantstopr
oposether
e.”
“
Aii
ok.
”
“
Wear
egoi
ngi
ntwoweeks.
”
“
Ok.
”
“Kegochekekal
unch?(
Shoul
dIcheckony
ou
duri
ngl
unch?)
”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“
Yes.
”
“
Whatshoul
dIbr
ingy
ou?
”
“
Youcanbr
ingmydi
ck?
”
Hel
aughed.“
Youar
eabusi
ngme.
”
“
Bri
ngi
t.Ar
ewegoi
ngt
oget
heratt
hesessi
onorwe
wi
l
lmeett
her
e?”
“
Wewi
l
lgot
oget
her
.”
“
Ok.
”
“
Letmeat
tendt
osomet
hing.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”
Shehungupwi
thasmi
l
e.

*
**

Nate’
sfr
iendcal
l
edNat
e’snumberwor
ri
edl
y.He
pi
cked.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Yousoundl
ow…y
ougood?
”
“
Yes,
what
’sup?
”
“
Icheckedont
heki
dst
hismor
ning.Theyar
egood.
”
“
Thanks.CanIasky
ousomet
hing?
”
“
Yeah.
”
“Domeneverget
…isnormaltorepor
tifamanhas….
ahhf
orgeti
t.Iwi
l
lseeyoul
ater.
”
“
Arey
ougood?Whathappened?
”
“
Not
hing.I
t’
sgood.
”
“
Youdon’
tsoundok.Di
dRonahar
assy
ou?
”
“
No.
”
“
Arey
ousur
eyouar
eok?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Okshap.
”
Thef
ri
endhungupev
enmor
ewor
ri
ed.

TWOWEEKSLATER…
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#142

AcarstoppedinfrontofRona’shousethenWazha’
s
companionleanedoverandkissedher.
“
Iwi
l
lcal
lyoul
ater
.May
bey
oucansneakmei
n.”
Wazhal
aughedshy
ly.“
Bye.
”
Shesteppedout,t
hegateopenedashedr ov
eof f
.
Wazhawal kedi
nsidethey
ardclosi
ngthegatethen
goti
nsidethehouse.Theki
dshappil
ylookedather.
“
Igoty
ousweet
s.”
Shehandedeachoneasweett
henpi
nchedQ’
sear
s
pl
ayf
ull
y.
“
Myboy
…wher
eismama?
”
“
Sheal
readyl
eft
.”
Ronawal
kedf
rom t
hebedr
oom f
ixi
nghi
scap.
“
Hima.
.”
“
Son.
.”
“Iknowyouarer
est
ingbutwer
eal
l
yneedy
our
assist
ance.
”
“
Kennyexpl
ainedev
ery
thi
ng.Don’
twor
ry.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Ronapi
nchedthesl
eev
esofhi
swhi
tet
-shi
rtt
hen
l
ookedattheki
ds.
“
Guy s,
wearegoi
ng.RememberwhatmamaandI
t
alkedabout
.Q!
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Great
.Il
ovey
oual
l
.”
Hedraggedthebagsoutsi
deandputt
hem i
nthe
l
uggagetrai
l
erbeforej
umpingi
nthequant
um.He
cal
l
edhiswifedri
vingof
f.
“
Hey
…”
“
Areyoudone?Iam goi
ngt
ocol
l
ectev
ery
oneand
l
ast
lypassbyther
e.”
“
Yes.Wear
edone.
”
“
Bye.
”
Hedr oppedthecal ldr
ivi
ngt oMaat l
a’shousewhere
Lebit
sowast ogetherwithAtsil
e.Hepar kedthe
quantum atthegat eandpr essedthehoot er.
Minuteslatertheyallwalkedout.Theyputt hebags
i
nt hetrai
lerwhiletheladiesgotin.Esismiled
getti
ngin.
“
HiRona.
”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Hey
,youl
ookgood.
”
“
Mxm…”
Apr
ilgoti
nwear
ingherj
eans.“
Rona.
.”
“
HeyMay
.”
Apr
ill
aughed.“
Mxm.
”
Peojumpedinwit
hLebit
sothenAtsil
eandMaat l
a
fi
nal
lygoti
nwithtwocool
erboxes,eachsi
tt
ing
besi
dehiswif
e.
Ronaleanedoverandopenedonecool
erboxt
hen
l
aughed.“Lonabanna!
”
Atsil
elaughed.“
It
’sal
ongway
.Idon’
twantt
odi
eof
thi
rst.
”
Lebi
tsoleanedoverandt
ookoutaf
izzydr
ink.
“Wenathisisfory
ou.”
Ronastart
edthequant
um dr
ivi
ngoffanddroveof f
headedtowhereBofel
oandhusbandwerewaiting.
Esisi
ghedastheygoti
nandoccupiedthebackseat.
Theyexchangedpl
easant
riessi
tt
ing.Ronatookoff
andwenttoAirpor
tJunct
ionMallandparkedatthe
parki
nglotdi
ali
ngKenny.
“
Hey
…”
“
Let
’sgo.Iam att
hepar
kingl
ot.
”
“
Wear
ewal
ki
ngout
,wher
eexact
lyar
eyoupar
ked?
”
Ronat
urnedhi
sheadandl
ookedather
.
“
Lookr
ight
.”
Kennyturnedthendr oppedthecallwalkingov erwit
h
Miawhowasdr aggi ngherbag.Mi a’
sl ongbr ai
ds
wavedasshewal kedi nhermi nidr
esst hatthewi nd
bl
ewexposi ngmor eofhert hi
ghs.Esiwat chedas
Kennyrockedherj eanshor tsandat opt uckedin
wit
habl azerontop.Shel ookedatherhugebel l
y
andsighed,thel
adi eswer eeitheri
ntightjeansor
shortcutesummerdr esseswhilesheworeal ong
maternit
ydr ess.Kennybendedt yi
nghershoelaces
whil
eMi afixedhersungl assesastheyapproached
thequantum.Mi aopenedt hedoorwit
hasmi le.
Kennyjumpedi natthef r
ontseathol
dingtwodr i
nks,
sheleanedov erandki ssedRonahandedhim adr i
nk.
At
sil
est
eppedoutandputMi
a’sbagi
nthet
rai
l
er
whi
leMi
asett
ledonthesi
ngl
eseatwi
thasmil
e.
“
Higuy
s…”
Apr
ill
ookedover
.“Whereisy
ourboy
fri
endorwear
e
pi
cki
nghim somewhere?”
“
Hei
snotcomi
ng.
”
“
Why
?Thi
sisacoupl
e’
str
ip.
”
“Hehadtotakehi
sdaught
eronat
ri
p.I
t’
sher
bir
thday
.”
Peonodded.“
Ohhbutkanat
hisi
sacoupl
ethi
ng.
”
At
sil
egoti
n.“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
Apr
ill
ookedatherhusband.“
Miasaysherboyfr
iend
won’
tbecoming.Ithoughtt
hiswasacouple’
stri
p.”
Miasmi
led.“Hewasgoingtocome,
unfortunat
ely
nowhecan’tsowejusthav
etogowithouthim.”
Peosighed.“
Theissueher
eist
hatthi
sisacoupl
e’
s
tr
ip.Youcan’
tcomealone.I
twi
llmakethi
ngs
awkwardhela.
”
MialookedatPeowi
thasmi
l
e.“
Sowhatar
eyou
suggesti
ng?
”
Apr
ilsi
ghed.“Peoisr
ight
.Youcan’
tcomeal
one.I
t’
s
acoupl
e’sret
reat.
”
“Mysisterfoundnot hi
ngwrongwi t
hit
.Maybey ou
shouldtal
kt oher,nnaIam notinthemoodforpetty
nonsenseija.Youar etal
ki
ngsoloudekareyou
plannedthi
st r
ip.Therewerenor ul
esmadewhen
thistr
ipwaspl anned.Ojumpetsiengt
otaEpureli
?
(Whyar eyouwor kedout?)”
“Ngng,ngwananyana(Lit
tl
ekid)wat
chhowy outal
k
tome.AllIam sayi
ngisthi
sisacouple’
sthi
ng.
Don’
teventrythatat
ti
tudeonme.Nnal oveotl
alel
a
i
ja.
”
Kennyt
urnedback.“
Guyscomeon…hewasgoingto
comebuthisdaught
er’
str
ipi
sal
sohappeni
ng.He
mightjoi
nus,wearenotsure.It
’snotf
airf
orust
o
takeherofft
hetri
pjustbecausehermanhada
changeofplans.
”
Peol
ookedatKenny
.“KanaKennyt
hisi
s-“
Lebi
tsol
ookedathi
swif
e.Shekeptqui
etasApr
il
fol
dedherar
mslooki
ngatMia.
“Iagr
eewit
hKenny.Therei
snoneedf orust
otake
herofft
hetr
ipj
ustbecauseherboy
fri
endgothel
d
upwithsomeoneel
se.”
Maatl
anoddedagr
eei
ngwit
hEsi
.“Iguessnowt
hat
’s
outoft
heway.Wecango.
”
Bof
elol
ookedatKenny
.“Wher
eisNol
o?”
“
Wear
emeet
ingt
hem i
nKasane.
”
“
Ohh.
.”
Ronastartedt
hequant
um thenjoinedt
heA1road.
Kennyturnedupthemusi
cincreasingt
hevol
ume
andstart
edsingi
ng.

Rei
tsat
saul
atsat
saul
a
Eer
eit
sat
saul
atsat
saul
a
Tsel
aebodul
e
Tsel
aebodul
e
Regopot
segae
Gae!

*
**

Wazhapr
epar
edf
oodf
ort
hekidsi
ntheki
tchen.Q
wal
kedwit
hhi
sar
twor
kfr
om hisr
oom.
“CanIpleasegoandseeLet habosohecanhelpme
withmypr oj
ect
.Iam st
uck.”Heshowedherhishal
f
doneartwork.Wazhalookedatitimpr
essed.
“
Wow,
youdi
dthat
?”
“
Yes.Ineedhel
pthough.
”
“
Youar
egoi
ngt
oyouruncl
e’
shouse?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Ok.
”
Qsmi
l
ed.“
Thanks,
lov
eyou!
”
WazhalaughedasQwalkedout
.Hewal
kedoutf
o
t
hegateandwenttogetacombi.

*
**

AtSedi’
shouse,
Sedi
openedthedoorforhi
m andlet
himin.Shet
ookhimtoherr
oom whereshelocked
thedoor.
“
Wher
ear
eyourpar
ent
sagai
n?”
“Myauntpassedonyester
day.Theywentt
her
e.Iwi
l
l
bewiththemaidmmel eenesheisinherr
oom
watchi
ngIndi
andramasonherphone.”
Qsmiledwit
hrel
i
efmakingherl
augh.Shet
ookhis
ar
twor kt
hensmil
edst
aringatj
usthowgoodhe
was.
“
Cany
oudr
awme?
”
“Yeah,Ithi
nksobutIcandr
awl
ooki
ngf
rom a
pict
ure.”
Shel
aughedt
henpl
ayedt
her
adi
oinherr
oom.
“
Arey
ouhungr
y?”
“
No.
”
Hegotcl osert
ohert henki ssedherputt
inghi
s
handsonherwai st.Sedi putherarmsaroundhis
neckkissinghim back.Hel aidheronthebedthen
tookoffherdressandpant ies.Hegotontopofher
openingherlegsthent ookoutt hecondom f
rom hi
s
pocketasSedi l
ookedathi m wi thapoundi
ngheart
.

*
**

Namet soscrolledthroughherphoneseatedi nher

car.Shepausedcomi ngacrossMaat l
a’
supl oads.I
t
seemedhewasbackwi thMoesiandshewas
pregnantt oo.Shel ookedatthepict
ureswonder ing
i
ft hismanev erlovedherthoughshedoubt ed.He
nev ersaidany t
hingaboutcommi tmentthroughout
theirrelati
onship.Shehadwant edachildthroughout
ther el
at i
onshipandheal wayssaidhedidn’twantto
havemor
eki
dsbutt
her
ehewas,
impr
egnat
inghi
s
ex.
Shetookadeepbr eathbli
nki
ngawayhert earsthen
unfr
iendedhimtogetherwit
hany oneassoci
ated
wit
hhi m.Shetookyetanotherdeepbreaththen
conti
nuedscroll
i
ngthroughherfacebooktimeli
ne.
Mostofheragemat esweremar ri
edwithchil
dren
andy etshedi
dn’tevenhaveone.
May begett
ingmar r
iedwasn’
tgoi
ngt ohappenfor
herbutatleastshecoul
dgetpregnant.Shewent
thr
oughhercont act
sthenpausedstari
ngat
Rebaone’snumberandcalledi
tcuri
ously.She
chuckledasitrang.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“Hey…keNametso.Iwasgoingthroughmycont
act
s
andcameacrossyours.
”Shelaughed.“Howi
smy
fr
iend?
”
Rebaonel
aughed.“
Don’
tgetmest
art
edon.
”
“Kanaaf
tert
hatYay
anev
erspoket
ome.Shecutme
off.
”
“
NnaIam consi
der
ingdi
vor
ce.
”
Namet
sof
rowned.“
Why
?”
“I
t’
snotwor
king.It
ri
edbutahhhwhat
’sl
efti
s
di
vorce.
”
“OhIam sor
ry.Ij
ustwantedt
oseeify
ouwer
est
il
l
usi
ngthesamenumber .Goshar
p.”
“Canwegooutf
orl
unch?Ar
eyoust
il
ldat
ingy
our
boss?
”
“
War
engnaar
e?Butwebr
okeupsomet
imeback.
”
“
Let
’smeetf
ordi
nner
.”
“
Obatagompolai
samosadi
wagago.(
Youwant
y
ourwif
etoat
tackme.
)”
“
Wear
edi
vor
cing.
”
“
Omaaka, (
Youarelyi
ng,)that’
swhatall
mar r
ied
mensayt ochowsingleladies.Lemaakakanalona.
(
Youar eli
ars.
)Nnaifyousl eepwit
hmeIam hav i
ng
yourchi
ldkegobakisetsabobel et
e.”
Rebaonel
aughed.“
Dinneri
tis.
”
*
**

LaterthatdayinKasane,Ronastoppedatt
hefil
li
ng
stati
onwher eTshenoloandPusowher ewai
ti
ngfor
them.Mi asteppedoutandwalkedinsi
dethefi
ll
i
ng
stati
onstorewhileevery
onesteppedoutand
stret
ched.KennyhuggedNol o.
“
Hey
…”
Nol
ogiggl
ed.“ThewayIam soexci
tedaboutt
his…I
f
eell
ikeateenager
.”
Theybot
hlaughed.Esismil
edatt
hem t
henwal
ked
i
nsidet
hefi
ll
ingstat
ionstor
e.
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Wit
h?”
“
Ngng,
ther
eist
ensi
onbet
weeny
out
wo.
”
“
Ah…it’
snothi
ng.Justdeci
dedt
okeepourdi
stance
f
orpeace’
ssake.
”
“Butyouguysar
eti
ght
.Youaremuchmorecl
osert
o
Esithanyouar
etome.Atsomepoi
ntIwasabit
j
eal
ousmmehelaIacceptedthatEsi
wasjustt
he
t
ypeyouwoul
dcl
ickwith.Whathappened?
”
“
Sepe.(
Not
hing.
)”
“
Ok.
.”
Pusofi
stbumpedwit
htheguy
sast
heyal
ll
aughed.
Apri
lwal
kedovert
oKenny.
“
HeyNol
o..
”
“
Heygi
rl
,wow!Youl
ookgood.
”
“
Thanks.
”
Theychatt
edforacoupl
eofminutest
henf
inall
ygot
backinthecar
.Esigoti
nandsatdownhol
dingher
Lays.
Apr
ilf
rowned.“
Wher
eisAt
sil
e?”
Lebi
tsol
ookedather
.“Hewentt
othebat
hroom.
”
PeolookedatMi
a’
sempt
yseat
.“Uhu,
Miai
sal
so
nothere.
”
Apr
ilst
eppedout
.“Iwi
l
lgoandcal
lAt
sil
e.”
Apr
ilwal
kedt
othet
oil
ets.Sheknockedont
he
ent
rance.
“
Atsi
l
e!”
Mi awalkedoutf
rom t
hel adi
estoi
let
sthenl
ooked
atApri
lwalki
ngpasther.Shepausedandtur
ned
back.
“
Canwet
alk?
”
“
About
?”
“Ist
hereany
thingIdidthatmadey
ouhateme?I
thoughti
twasjustyoudisli
ki
ngmebutnowIcan
seeit’
smorethanthat.
”
“Idon’tli
key oubecauseyopudon’ tknowno
boundar ies.Howcany ouf i
nditokt ofli
rtwithyour
brotherin-lawordressthewayy oudosomet i
mes?
Youdon’ tf i
ndanythi
ngwr ongwi thwearinghot
pantsi nfrontofyourbrot
herinlaws.Idon’ tli
kehow
yout hinkmyhusbandi syourfriendandt hatyoucan
j
ustl aughwi thhi
m asifyouarebestbuddi es.”
“
What
?”
“AndIhaven’
tfor
got
tenwhathappenedatt
he
hospi
talt
hatti
mewhichmakesmet hinkt
hat
somet hi
ngmusthav ehappenedbet weeny ouand
Atsi
le.Hemi ghtdenyitbutIam notstupid.You
thi
nky ouareallt
hatandev ery
oneelsei sugly,l
et
mef indoutthatyouoncedidany t
hingwi t
hmy
husbandIam goi ngtopourhotoilony ourface.You
areawhor eIfeelsor
ryforthatguy.Imaginebuildi
ng
ahomewi t
hsomeonel i
keyou.Nxla!”
Apr
il
’sphoner
angf
rom herhandasMi
awal
ked
away.
.
“
Babe?Wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
Iam backi
nthecar
.Let
’sgo.
”
“
Ok.
”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#143

Apri
lwal
kedtothequant
um andl
ookedatKenny
thr
oughherwi
ndow.
“
Kenny
,kekopar
ebue.(
pleasel
et’
stal
k.)
”
Kennylookedatherthenst
eppedoutoft
he
quant
um.Apr i
ltookKeny’
shandandtookherasi
de.
“
Iam scar
ed.What
’swr
ong?Di
dIdosomet
hing?
”
Apr
ill
aughed.“
Ijustwantust
otal
k.”
“
Youwer
enotev
ensmi
l
ing.
”
“
Mxm,
Iam smi
l
ingnow.
”
Kenysmi
l
ed.“
Ok.Whati
sit
?”
“Kennyyouaremorethanmysist
erin-
law.Youar
e
mysi st
erandIfeel
asmyoldersi
sterIshoul
dbe
abletotel
lyouwhensomethi
ngiswrong.”
“
Yes.Youcant
ell
me.
”
“
Iam notgoi
ngt
oli
e,Iam notcomf
ort
abl
ewi
thMi
a
comi ngwi th.Tobehonesthel aIam not
comf ortablewi thher ,ev
er …If eel sheist oof ri
endly
withmyhusband, shef l
i
r t
swi t hmyhusbandandas
awoman, somet hi
ngt el
lsmet hatsomet hingonce
wentdownbet weenbot hoft hem butofcauseI
don’thav eev idence.WhatMi asai dtohi mt hattime
atthehospi t
al stil
lgetstomeandwhi chl eavesme
wor r
iedbecauseMi aisAt si
le’ssister-
law.Iknowi t
whenmymani shi di
ngt hingsf rom meandMi ai s
somet hinghehi desf rom me.Gonanat heywer e
bothgoneatt hesamet ime, imagi newhatIwas
thi
nking.Idon’ tevent hi
nki t’
sokf orMi at ocome
withy etherboy fri
endcan’ tbeher e.Ofcauset here
werenor uleswhenourmenpl annedt hist r
ipbutI
feeltheypl annedi tasacoupl e’sretr
eat .NnaKenny
Iwantt oenj oymy selfkoVi cFal lsnott ohav eany
sortofdr ama.Weal lhav ebeent hroughal ot,wear e
try
ingt otakei tdaybydayt henal it
tl
er elaxation
comesal ongway …wewantt or elax,may beIshoul d
speakf ormy self.Iwantt orelaxmmehel aMi aeneI
don’ttrusther .”
Kennysl
i
ght
lysmi
l
ed.“
Doy
oust
il
lhav
emor
eto
say
?”
Apr
ill
aughed.“
No.Ihav
ebar
edev
ery
thi
ng.
”
“Ok.Iheary ou.Honest lyIknowi t’
sacoupl e’
sthing,
Orawasmeantt ocomewi thus, heev enpai dthe
faref orcomi ngandMi awasr eallyexci tedabout
this.Ij ustf eltIcouldn’tletherdownbutIst i
l
l
under standwher eyouar ecomi ngf rom.Asmuchas
Iam sadt hatshehast ogo, Ibel i
ev ey ouhav ea
point .Ispoket oMi atwomont hsbackabouti ssue
yagonaf ri
endl ywi t
hpeopl e’
smenandwecl earedit
outnowondery oudon’ tseei thappeni ngmor eof t
en.
Idon’ tt hinkMi awoul dsl eepwi t
hAt silet houghIam
notGodandIcan’ tsayf orsur ebutshewoul dn’t
.I
alsowi shy ouhadt oldmewi thy ourconcer nslong
back, Iknowy ouandPeodon’ tlikeherandIonce
hear dy ougossi pi
ngher .Mi aget sdef ensi vewhen
shef eel sat tacked, allherlifeshe’ shadt odef end
her self.Youcoul dhav ehadt hisconv ersationwith
herandl etherseegor ewenay ouar enot
comf or tablebuty ouratherdeci dedt ot agt eam le
Peoandhat eher ,sheknowsy ouhat ehernowonder
shehasanat tit
udet owar dsy out oo.Lennat he
reasonwhyIdon’
thangoutwithy ouandPeot hat
muchkegorey ouar
ealwaystalkingaboutother
peoplewhi
chmakesmebel i
ev ethatyoualsogossip
aboutmewhenIam notthere.Letmeaddr ess
kgangyaMiathenwecango. ”
“
Inevergossi
pyou.Il
ovey
ou,
kanawenay
oudon’
t
r
eal
izeit
.”
Kennylaughed.“
Ifi
t’
sli
ket
hatt
henwehavenoi
ssue.
Lennakeagor at
a.(Ial
sol
ovey
ou.
)Let
’sgo.
”
Theywal
kedbackt
othequant
um.
“
Mia,
comel
ove…”
Miasteppedoutandl
ookedatKennywi
thaknowi
ng
smil
e.
“
It
’sok.
”
“
Iam sor
ry-
“
“
Whydoy ouapol
ogi
zewheny
oudi
dnot
hing
wrong?
”
“
Koor
eIf
eel
real
l
ysad.Ir
eal
l
ylookedf
orwar
dtot
his
wi
thy
ou.
”
Mi
asmiled.“Lookf
orwar
dtoitwi
thyourhusband.
Weshouldhaveourowntri
ponet
ime.”
“
Def
ini
tel
y.Icangety
ouat
icketbackhome.
”
“No,
Iwi l
lsorti
tout
.May
beIcansur
pri
seOr
ako
Okavango.”
“Thatwi
ll
beani
cesur
pri
sebutIsuggesty
out
ell
himtoyouar
ecomi
ng.”
“
Ngng,Iwantt
ocatchhim sl
eepi
ngwithFi
fisot
hat
whenIt
rampl
ehishear
t,Imakesure.
”
“
Youar
egoi
ngt
ohel
l
.”
Mialaughed.“
Iwil
lmeetabunchofyouthere.
”She
tookherbagfrom t
hel
uggagetr
ail
erthenhugged
hersist
er.
“
Don’
tfeel
sad.Iknowmypr
esenceannoyt
hem,
t
hat
’showmuchpowerIhav
eandIproudtohav
eit
.”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Bye!
”
“
Bye.
”
Kennygotbacki
nthequant
um asev
ery
onel
ooked
ather
.
“Mi
ahasdecidedtogoandsur
pri
seherboy
fri
endi
n
Okavangosoit
’sgoi
ngt
obejustus.
”
Peosmi
l
ed.“
Ok.
”
Kennyputonherseat
bel
tasRonadr
oveaway
.

*
**

Miawat chedasthequant um di sappearedt hentook

outherphoneandsear chedf orcabsi nKasane.She
gotanumberandcal ledi tlookingaround.She
droppedthecallaf
tertalkingbr i
efl
ywi ththecabguy
thensenthim herl
ocationwhi l
elookingf orafli
ght
fl
yingtoMaun.Herphoner ang,shesmi led.
“
Heybabe.
.”
“
Hey
,howf
arar
eyou?
”
“
Wear
eheadedf
orKazungul
abor
der
.”
“
Ok,
Imi
ssy
ou.
”
“
Imi
ssy
out
oo.Howi
sitgoi
ngkoOkav
ango?
”
“Good.Sam i
sreal
lyexci
ted.I
twoul
dhav
ebeen
awesomeifJunioral
socamewi t
h.”
“
Yah…wher
eisy
ourbabymama?
”
“
Theot
herr
oom.Shewi
l
lshar
ingwi
thSam.
”
“
Soy
ouar
esl
eepi
ngal
one?
”
“
Yes.
”
“
Wher
ear
eyoust
ayi
ng?
”
“Ser
iusSt
arhpot
el.Ei
shbabet
hishot
eli
sev
ery
thi
ng.
Thesepeopl
earemakingmoney.
”
“Ihear
d.Nol
owor
kst
her
e.Whati
syourr
oom
number?”
“
Why
?”
“Ngng,Ijustwanttoknowsot hatincaseIcan’
tget
hol
dofy ouony ourphone,Icanalwaysbe
connect
edt oyourroom.”
“
Ok,
Room 24.
”
“
Any
way
s,Ihav
etogo.Wewi
l
ltal
k.”
“
Shar
p.”
Shehungupasthecabpull
edover
.Thecabguyput
herbagsi
nthebootwhi
leshegoti
nfi
ll
i
ngher
detai
l
sforherf
li
ghtt
oMaun.

*
**

Twohour
slater,
Ronapar
kedt
hecarataSaf
ari
l
odgei
nVictori
aFal
ls.
“
Wear
eher
e!”
Theyallst
eppedoutsmi li
nglookingatt
hebeautif
ul
l
odge,theenv i
ronmentfel
tdiff
erentt
oo.Kenny
snappedaf ewpictur
esast hemengott hei
rbags.
Tshenolostoodbesideher.
“
Ihopeyoudon’tkickPusoandIoutgot weit
’sa
marr
iedcoupl
e’
st hing.Legal
e,atl
eastIwi
ll
bewi t
h
Maatl
aandEsi.
”
Kennyl
aughed.“
No…”
Ronaputhi
shandar
pundKenny
’swai
st.
“
Let
’sgeti
n.Iam t
ir
ed.
”
“
Met
oo.
”
Theyal
lwalkedinsi
deandcheckedinwhil
eanother
fami
lycheckedout.Theyt
urnedtowal
koutthen
Emastoppdstari
ngatKennyandeveryoneel
se.She
smil
ed.
“
Babymama…”
Kennyl
aughed.“
Don’
tst
artwi
thmewakanda.
”
“
Kanay
ouar
ejeal
ousofmybeaut
y.”
Theybot
hlaughed.“
Iam i
nti
midat
ed.
”
“
Ehhebi
l
ennaIhav
ethi
ckski
n.”
Theylaughedev
enharder.“Wenathegi
rl
.KanaIam
sti
l
lwaiti
ngtobetaughtalesson.Wheni
sit
coming?”
“
Otl
aswabaKenny
.”
“
Wakandathegi
rl
.”Kennyl
ookedbesi
deherand
l
aughed.
“
Tat
so,
soy
out
wodeci
dedt
ocr
ytoget
her
?”
Tat
sochuckl
ed.“Iwasn’
tcr
ying,
shewas.Ij
ust
comfor
tedher
.”
“
Youdeser
veeachot
her
.Yourki
dsar
ebeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Howcantheynotwhent
heyhav
eabeaut
if
ul
mot
herl
i
keme.”
Kennysmil
edatEma.“Iwil
lneverst
opcal
l
ingyou
wakanda,
notaft
erhowy oupostedmeonfacebook
thatt
ime.
”
“
Sies!
”
Theywalkedawaylaughi
ngt henRonal
edKennyt
o
thei
rroom.Shewalkedinthenpausedst
ari
ngatt
he
candlesandt
herosesonthebed.
“
Babe,
Ithi
nkwegott
hewr
ongr
oom.
”
“
No.i
t’
sther
ightr
oom.
”
Theywalkedi
nsi
deasKennyl
ookedatt
her
omant
ic
setup.
“
Youdi
dthi
s?”
“
Ical
l
edt
hem andaskedt
hem t
odoi
t.
”
“
It
’sbeaut
if
ul.
”
Ronaputasi
dethei
rbagsandtookoffhi
st-
shir
t.He
pul
ledKennycl
oserandki
ssedherhardt
hather
pussythrobbed.Heunbut tonedhershortst
henhe
puthishandi nsi
deherpant i
esandtouchedher
pussyt.Hebr eathedheav i
l
ygentlyr
ubbinghercli
t
ashisdickgr ewev enharderi
nhispants.Heslowly
sl
ippedhisf i
ngerinherwethol eandtappedher
upperplates.Kennypausedki ssi
ngasshemoaned
whil
ehet appedherg- spot.
“
Ronaaa.
.”
Hepausedt henundr essedher.Helookedather
bodywi t
hstretchmar ksonherbuttandst omach.
Shestil
lhadthescaronherchestt hatwascaused
bythegunshot .Ofcauseherbodyhadchangedov er
ti
mebutshel ookedmor ebeauti
ful
.Thiswast he
womanwhohadcar riedhiski
dsandwi feydamn
gavehim beautif
ulkids.Shesmiledconfusedyet
aroused.
“
What
?”
“
Youar
ebeaut
if
ul.
”
Sheblushed.Hekissedherneckdroppi
ngkisses
downherchest,herbreast
,herst
omacht hem heput
herl
egonhershoul derandbegunsucki
ngherl i
kea
cal
ffeedi
ngfr
om i
t’
smot
her.Kennyst
oodwi
thl
eg
moaningsof
tl
yashemuf
fedher.
“
Mhmmm Ronaaa…”
Shel
ostbal
ancet
henhegotupcat
chi
ngher
.
“
Let
’sbat
h..
”
“
Huh?
”
“
Let
’sbat
h.”
Shelookedathi
sbulgeandbackinhisey
es
wonderi
ngwhyhewoul djustt
ort
ureherl
iket
hatt
o
onl
yleaveherwant
ing.
“
Ok…”
Hel edhertothebathr
oom.Kennylookedatthe
fl
oorcov er
edwi t
hrosesi
ncludi
ngthewateri
nthe
bathtub.Therewasabott
leofwineiniceandtwo
gl
assesont hesi
de.Shet
urnedtohim.
“
Babe!
”
Heki
ssedher
.“Tsena.(
Geti
n.)
”
Shegotinthenhetookof
fhi
spantsandj
oinedher
i
nside.Ronapour
edthem wi
neandgaveheraglass.
Kennyt
ookasi
p.
“Thankyouf
oral
lthi
s.Babe,r
emembert
hetimey
ou
saidAtsi
l
echeat
edonApr i
l
?Whodidhecheat
with?”
“Idon’tknow,
hesai
dsomegi rl
.Idon’tev
enwantto
knowbecauseIdon’twanti naposit
ionwhereIhav
e
toanswerquesti
onsliketheseones.Cheerst
ome
mindingmyownbusi ness.”
Kennyl
aughed.“Mxm,gatwengnaar e?Ij
ustwantto
knowbecausewhenApr i
lwastalki
ngt ome,she
madeitseem asifMi
awoul deversleepwit
hAtsil
e
andnnaIdon’tev
enwantt oaskMi abecauseit
’s
off
ensi
vehelatoevenasksuchat hing.
”
“Idon’tt
hinki
t’
sMi abutweshouldst
ayawayfrom i
t.
Mi aisyoursi
ster,att
hesamet i
meApr i
li
syour
sisteri
n-l
aw.Youdon’ twantt
obebetweenthattr
ust
me.Justmi ndy ourown.”
Kennytookbotht
hei
rglassesandputthem down
thengotontopofhi
m kissi
nghim.Ronaheldher
waistt
henpull
edherdownonhi ser
ectdick.
*
**

I
nMaun, Miawalkedinsi
dethehot
eldraggi
ngher
bag.Shewalkedovertother
ecept
ioni
st.“
Hi,Iwoul
d
l
iketoknowwher eroom 24i
s.”
“
HiandwelcometoSer
iusStarHot
el.Room 24in
t
hesecondfl
oor
,westwing,
downthecor r
idor
.You
wi
ll
seeit.
”
“
Thanky
ousomuch.
”
“
Enj
oyy
ourst
ay!
”
Shewal kedtotheelevat
orandpr essedsecondfloor
.
Itwhiskedherupthenshest eppedoutsecondslater.
Shelookedatnumber sonthedoor sthenfi
nal
ly
stoppedinfrontof24.Shetookadeepbr eat
hand
knockedcall
inghim.
Oraanswer
edopeni
ngt
hedoort
henhepaused
st
ari
ngather,
asmil
ecover
edhi
sface.
“
Shi
t!Youcoul
dn’
tgowi
thoutme?
”
Mi
alaughed.“
Itwasgoi
ngt
obebor
ing.
”
“Wewill
goalonesomeday .”Hetookherbagand
l
edherinsi
dehisr oom.Thehappinessonhi sface
coul
dn’
tbemi ssed.Hef r
ownedatt heknockont he
doorasMiatookof fhershoesthenhewal kedover
andopened.Fif
ilookedathim.
“Hey
,wewerebor
edal
one.Thoughtwecoul
dhang
outt
hissi
de.
”
Mi
arol
l
edherey
est
hensatont
hebed.
“
Thatwon’
tbepossi
ble.
”
Fi
fil
ookedi
nsi
deandl
ookedatMi
a.
“
Oh,
hiMay
a!”
“
Hi.
”
Fi
fismi
l
ed.“
Ok,
it’
sok.Shar
p.”
Shewal
kedaway
,Or
acl
osedt
hedoorandl
ookedat
her
.
“
Iam happyy
ouar
eher
e.”
“
Whatwer
eyougoi
ngt
osayi
fIwer
enother
e?”
Orawalkedoverandki
ssedher.“
Iwoul
dhavetaken
Sam i
nandt ol
dherIcan’
thangoutwit
hher
.”
“
Sam cancome.
”
“
No.
”Heki
ssedher
.“Wewi
l
lseehert
omor
row.
”

*
**

Nametsolai
donherbedl aterthatni
ghtreadi
nga
novel
shehadpurchasedear l
ieron.Herphonerang
di
stur
binghert
henshefinishedt hesent
enceshe
wasreadi
ngbefor
epicki
ng.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Soy
ouhav
eref
usedt
ohav
edi
nnerwi
thme?
”
Nametsolaughed.“
Rebawee,pleasef
ocusony
our
marr
iage.Idon’
twanttobesued.”
“Shei
snothomer i
ghtnow.Iam al
one.Shoul
dI
cometoyourhouse?”
“
Youar
emar
ri
ed.
”
“
Wher
edoy
oust
ay?
”
“
Iam t
ell
i
ngy
ouReba,
ify
ousl
eepwi
thmeIam
goi
ngt
ohav
eyourchi
l
d.”
“
Iam comi
ng.Wher
edoy
oust
ay?
”

*
**

Wazhacl eanedupt hesit

ti
ngroom put
ti
ng
every
thingwher eitst
ayed.Shewenttotheki
tchen
wheresheswi t
chedofftheli
ghtst
henherphone
rangfrom thecouchinthesitt
ingr
oom.Shewal ked
overandpi cked.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Heybabe,
Iam out
side.
”
“
Ok,
wai
t.
”
Shewalkedoutofthehouseandwenttothegat
e
whereshesteppedoutandgoti
nheryounger
boyf
ri
end’scar.
“
Aret
heki
dssl
eepi
ngal
ready
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Thensneakmei
n.”
“Ngng, Ican’
tlety
oucomei
n.Thi
sismywor
k
place.
”
“
Iwilll
eav
etomorrowmorni
ngbef
oretheyeven
wakeup.Imissy
ou,Iwantt
ospendthenightwi
th
you.
”
“
It
’swr
ongt
olety
oui
n.”
“Iknowbutwhatiswr
ongwi
thbei
ngal
i
ttl
enaught
y?
Youshouldsetl
oose.
”
Shesighed.“
Ok.Buty
ouhav
etol
eav
ewaybef
ore
theywakeup.”
Hesmi
l
ed.“
Ok.
”
Shegoti
nsi
dewit
hhi
mthenl
ockedt
hedoor
sand
l
edhimtoherr
oom.
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#144

Namet
soopenedf
orRebat
henhewal
kedi
nsmi
l
ing.
“
Hey
…”
“
Str
anger
.War
eokaeYaone?(
Wher
eisYaone?
)”
“
Shesay
sbusi
nesst
ri
p.”
Nametsoclosedherdoort
henchuckled.“
Whatdo
youwant?Kanamar r
iedmenlal
apisa.(Marr
iedar
e
t
iri
ng.
)”
Theysatdown.“ Iam di
vor
cingher
.Thatonei
sa
fact.Ineverknewpeopl
ecouldact
uall
ystayi
na
l
ov elessmarri
ageall
forki
ds.”
Namet solookedathim.“TheydobutIsuspectyou
arely
ing.Youwoul dneverl
eaveyourbeaut
iful
yel
lowbornwi fe.
”
“
Sheisnolongeri
nter
est
edinme.Shesaysour
mar
ri
agehasbecomebor i
ng.It
ri
edtobri
ngback
t
hesparkbutIam j
ustal
oneint
hismarr
iage.
”
Namet sol
ookedathim ashespokesadl
y.“Iam
sorr
y.Iknowhowitfeel
st obeal
oneinthe
rel
ati
onship.
”
“I
t’
sreal
lypai
nful
,Iam j
ustsur
pri
sedt
hingsj
ust
changedsofast.
”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“
Whatabouty
ou?Howhasi
tbeengoi
ng?
”
“Ibrokeupwi thMaat l
abecauseIsawnof ut
urein
ourr elationship.Itwasj ustsexandmor esex.As
soonasIl ef
thim, hegotbackwi thhi sexandsheis
evenpr egnantt houghIbeggedhi mf orachil
d
throughoutourr el
ationship.Iam goingtoaccept
thatr elationshipsarenotf oreveryone.Iendedup
stayingwi thMaat laforsol ongevent houghIcould
seet hati twasn’ tgoingtowor kbecauseIf eared
beingal one.Iconst antl
ygetaskedbyf ri
endswhenI
am get ti
ngmar ri
edori fIhaveachi l
dbutIgot
neither.”
“
Soy
ouwantachi
l
d?”
“
Badly
.Ireal
lywantachil
d.Iam r
eadytoevenrai
se
t
hatchil
dall
alone.Atl
easti
fIhavetwo.Marr
iage
andl
ovei
snotf
orev
ery
one.That
’saf
act
.”
“
Yout
hinkso?
”
“Iam wayol dtothinkIam goingtofal
linloveand
behappy .Ihavef ail
edRebaandassadand
depressingasi ti
s,Iam goi
ngt oaccepttheharsh
real
it
y .Mysisterhasf i
veki
ds,herbabydaddygot
hisbigbreakthroughacoupl eyear
sbackand
marriedher.Myy oungerbr
otherhasachi l
dtoo.Can
youimagi newhi l
ennaIhav enon.”
“
Igety
ou.
”
“ThankGodwewer enevercl
oset
oanyofour
rel
ati
ves.Imagi
neatt
endi
ngfamil
ygather
ingsand
beingaskedift
her
eisanythi
ngwrongwit
hme. ”
“Sowheny oucall
edmewher eyoulooki
ngfora
potenti
alsperm donor
?Wai t
seketsabadesper
ati
on.
(Iam scaredofdesperat
ion.
)”
Nametsol
aughedsmacki
nghi
sar
m pl
ayf
ull
y.“
Leav
e
mealone.
”
“
Youar
ebeaut
if
ul.Doy
ouknowt
hat
?”
Shel
ookedathi
m.“
Wel
lmybeaut
yhasn’
tgot
tenme
any
wher
e.”
“Becauseyouwer ebusywi t
hamanwhosawno
fut
urewi t
hy ouf ormorethan7y ear
s.Hadyoul ef
t
him al
onet r
ustme, y
ouwoul dhavebeenmar r
iedby
nowwi th4ki ds.Justacceptit
.Ojel
eerror
.”
“
Youar
eri
ght
.”
Rebaonel
ookedatherl
i
pst
henl
eanedov
erand
gaveherasof
tki
ss.
“Iam goi
ngtodi
vorceandcomeforyou.Til
ltodayI
regr
etwhathappened.Hadwhathappenednot
happened,y
ouandIwoul dhav
egonef ar
.”
Namet
sosmi
l
ed.“
Yeah…may
be…may
benot
.”

*
**

InVi
cFal
l
s,Apr
ill
aidbesi
deAt
sil
ethenshel
ooked
athi
m.
“
CanIasky
ousomet
hing?
”
“
Yeah…”
“Hav
ey oueverf
indyoursel
finacompr
omi
sing
posi
ti
onwithMia?”
At
sil
elookedather
.“Wher
eist
hatcomi
ngf
rom?
”
“
Justanswerme.
”
“Apr
ilwhyonear
thwoul
dIfindmy sel
fina
compromisi
ngposi
ti
onwit
hMi a?
”
“
Iam j
ustaski
ng.
”
“
Miai
sli
kemyl
i
ttl
esi
ster
.Whatdoy
oumean?
”
“
Thatt
imeatt
hehospi
tal
-“
“Shesawmewi ththewomanIwascheatingwit
h.I
threat
enedhernottot
ell
that
’swhyshesaidwhat
shesaid.Howmanyt i
mesdoIhavetotel
l y
outhat
?”
“
KanaAt
sil
e-“
“Apri
l
,pleasedon’tr
uint
histr
ipforus.Formet
he
l
east,i
fwenay ouwanttobeangr yandmoody,go
aheadbutnnaIwantpeace.Leav emeoutofyour
i
ssues.Iam ti
red.Goodnight
.”
Hecl
osedhi
sey
es.Apr
ill
ookedathi
m.
“
Kant
ereal
wa?(
Arewef
ight
ing?
)”
Hei gnor edherandr emainedwi t
hhisey esclosed.
Aprillaiddownst ari
ngatt heceil
ing,minuteswent
byt henshel ookedatherhusbandpeacef ull
y
sleeping.Shecoul dn’tunderst
andwhyshecoul dn’
t
j
ustl etitgobecausenowshewascausi ng
unnecessar yfight
s.Shel aidherheadonhi schest
thencl osedherey est ootr
yingtosleep.

*
**

Inotherr oom, Esil

aidonthebedawake, she
couldn’tsleepnomat t
erhowmuchshet r
ied.
Insomni ahadherati t’
sbest.Sher ubbedherbellyas
thebabymov ed,ev
erydayshegr ewoutoff earof
havingachi ldatherageandst artedgrowingmor e
excited.
Shetookherphonewhi
chwasconnectedt
othefr
ee
wif
iandsearchedf
orsomebabynames.Anhour
l
ater
,Maatl
aopenedhisey
esandlookedather
.
“
Hey
…”
Shel
ookedathim.“Iam goi
ngt hr
oughsomebaby
namesbabe.Ihav
eaf ewIalreadyli
ke.
”
“
Aren’
tyout
ir
ed?
”
“
Iam notsl
eepy
.”
Maat
lasatupr
ightandl
ookedather
.“What
’s
wr
ong?”
“
Not
hing.Ij
ustcan’
tsl
eep.Youcansl
eep.
”
Hey
awned.“
Whatnamesdi
dyoucomeupwi
th?
”
Shesmil
edshowi
nghi
mt henamesshehadput
asi
de.“
Whatdoyout
hink?”
“
Theyarebeaut
if
ul.Ar
eyouokbabe?Inot
icedhow
t
heladi
esaretr
eati
ngyou.I
fyouwant
,wecan
l
eave.
”
Esi l
ookedathim andl aughed.“Whatway ?Iam
goodwi thPeo, Iam goodwi thBofel
o.Ineverhada
problem wi
thher ,shedidn’tdoanythi
ngtome.
TshenoloandIar egoodandsoi sApri
landI .I
fthi
s
i
saboutKenny …”Shesmi l
ed.“Leavei
t.Thingswi l
l
wor kthemselvesoutbutIam nother etofol l
ow
afterKenny.Iam heret ohaveagoodt ime, sadIam
pregnantandwon’treal
l
yenjoyitbutbesi
desthat
,I
am good.Iam exci
tedaboutseeingthefal
ls,
maybe
that’
swhyIcan’tsl
eep.”
Maatl
alaughed.“
Justl
ikey
oucoul
dn’
tsl
eept
he
ni
ghtbefor
eourweddingday?
”
Esi
laughed.“
Iwassoexci
ted,
youshoul
dhav
eseen
me.”
Hesmi
ledt
henkissedher.“
Thengetr
eadyt
oenj
oy
r
ound2ofourwedding.
”
Esil
ookedathim gi
ggl
i
ng.“
Asl
ongasIam get
ti
ng
att
enti
onIam goodwit
hit
..
”
Aslightpai
nhadherr ubbi
ngherbel
l
ythenshe
brusheditofftel
l
ingMaatl
amorenamesshewas
comi ngacrossonherphone.

*
**

Onthesamenight
,Fi
fil
aidonthebedwithher
daught
ert
alki
ngtoNatashaonthephone.
“
KanannaIdon’tunder
standwhyhehadt
obr
ing
t
hiswomanhere.”
“Idon’tli
keher,
Ifeel
li
keshei sthet
ypet oabuseour
kids.Itol
dOrammehedoesn’ twanttoli
stenbutI
am tell
ingyou.Shedoesn’
tevenhaveachi l
d,she
doesn’tknowhowt otakecareofachild.Mmat al
k
tohim.Idoubthewoul dli
stentome.”
Fi
fisi
ghed.“
Keboregil
emogomaswe.( Iam so
bor
ed.)Hehasneverbroughtanyofhi
sgir
lf
ri
ends
onhischi
ldr
en’
str
ip.”
“Nyaamma, tal
kt ohim.Kanathisi
sSam’schance
tofeelhowapr operfami
lyissupposedtofeelli
ke.
Tellhimtotellhertogo.AndIdon’tthi
nkthat
rel
ationshi
pwi l
l l
asthel
a.I
t’
sgoingtoendi ntearsI
am tell
ingyou.”
“
Letmecal
lhi
m.”
“
Updat
eme.
”
“
Ok,
shar
p.”
“
Bye.
”
Fi
fihungupt
hencal
l
edOr
a.Hi
sphoner
angf
ora
whi
l
ethenhepi
cked.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Canwet
alk?
”
“
Whati
sit
?”
“Idon’tfeelcomf or
tablewithMiabeinghere.This
wassupposedt obef orourdaught
er.KanaSam
getstoexper iencehowar ealf
amil
yissupposedt o
belikeoncei nawhi le,nowwi t
hMiashewon’ tfeel
howi tfeels.
”
“
Arey
oul
i
steni
ngt
oyour
sel
fri
ghtnow?
”
“Yes.Kantemmegonewhyar eyoudoi ngthi
s?Or a
youhav eachanceofhav ingabi ghappyf amily.
Natti
eandIar ewil
lingtocomet ogetherandshar e
you.Youar eourman, youcanhav eusbot handwe
canraiseourki dstogether.Iheardit’spossi
blefor
youtomar rybot hofus.Nat t
ieandIar ebestfr
iends,
wear enotev enjealousofoneanot her.Whycan’t
youjusttaket hi
sblessingt hati
sbei ngoffer
edt o
youonasi lverplatt
er?”
Mi
alaughed.“
Heeel
ang!Li
stent
othi
sone!
”
Fi
fipausedasMi
acr
ackedl
aughi
ngsohar
d.
“Gatwewewil
lshar
e?Ican’
tbeli
evet
his.Wareshar
e
naremosadi
kewena?Babe,didyouhearthat
?”
Fi
fihungup.Herphoner
angagai
n,sheanswer
ed.
“Ican’
tbel
i
eveyouputmeonloudspeaker
.What
exactl
ydoseei
nthatwoman?Herface?Herbody
?
She-“
“Ifthisishowy outreatedhispastgi rlf
riends,well
todayy oumetawhol ediff
erentbr eedaut wa
mmagwennana?Ehe, youhav emetat otall
y
differentbreed.Wedon’ tdot hather e.Icanseey ou
arenotgoi ngtorespectmypr esencebuti t’
sok.You
aregoi ngt orespectme, Iam notgoi ngt oforceyou,
i
twi l
ljusthappenonewayort heot herbecausenna
Iam notwhaty ouar eusedt o.Iwi l
lnotbe
threatenedbyababymamawhodoesn’ twor kbut
surv i
vesonherdaught er’
smai nt enance.Ket l
il
ego
gobankany a(Iam goingt ofixy ou)andwhenIf ix
,I
makesur e.Thatcaraty ourhouse, thatcari sfor
Sam notf oryoutodr ivearoundandSam i sstil
l
youngt ohav eacarsoi tshouldn’ tbet her einthe
f
ir
stplacebutwewill
addressit
.Goandt el
lyour
f
ri
end,thi
ngsareabouttochangeandtheyareabout
t
ochangef ort
hebett
er.Gatweshare?Heeedu!”She
l
aughedhangingup.

*
**

Inthemi ddleoft henight ,

Wazha’ sboy fr
iendslowl y
wokeupandl ookedatWazhasl eeping.Hedr essed
upt hent iptoedhol di
nghi sshoes.Hel ookedar ound
thebi gbeaut i
fulhouse, healway ssawsuchhouses
from out sideandbei ngi nsidefeltl
ikeadr eam.I t
l
ookedl ikeahousewhi chwoul dbef eaturedonTV.
Hel ookedatt hest ai
rcasesgoi ngupst air
s.Hisey es
fellont hehugeTVmount edont hewal l
.Het ookthe
stairsgoi ngupst ai r
s,theTvwoul dbeamuch
strugglet ost eal.Hesl owlyopenedadoorupst ai
rs
thensmi led.Itwasdef init
elythemast erbedr oom.
Hewal kedt ot hecl osetandwal kedin.Ther ewerea
l
otofcl othesandbags.Thehi ghheel swer eal ot
too.Hewal kedov ertothewat chesdi splayed,surel
y
ri
chpeopl ehadni cel i
vest heywoul dnevernoti
ceit.
Het ookt woandputt hem inhi spocket.Helooked
atthem andt ookt hreemor eandwal kedout.His
eyesf el
l ontheni cewhi tehandbag.Hewentback
foritthent ookittoget herwi t
hapai rofheels.He
hurri
edoutandwentdownst ai
rs.Helookedatt he
doorbutt herewasnokey st ounlock.Hisheart
startedpoundi ngasher ecall
edWazhat el
li
nghim
thatitwasoneoft hosedoor sthatneededaPI Nt o
unlock.Hehur ri
edbackupst ai
rsandputev eryt
hing
backt henr ej
oinedWazhai nbed.I nhersleep,
Wazhat urnedsnor inggi vi
nghi m hisback.

*
**

Thefoll
owingdayi ntheafternooni
nVictori
aFal l
s,
thecrewwal kedtogetheronthepathwayast he
baboonslurkedaroundmaki ngsounds.Apr i
ltook
vari
ouspict
ur eswalki
ngaheadwi ththelocalwho
wasguidingt hem l
i
steningasheexplainedwi t
hthe
deepZimbabweanaccentt hatmadeev ery
thinghe
sai
dsoi
nter
est
ingandwor
thl
i
steni
ngt
o.
Theycoul dactuall
yheart het hunderoft hef alls
accompani edwi t
ht hesoundsoft hewat erfrom a
dist
ance.Thet rai
lsst art
edget ti
ngsl i
pper yast hey
approachedthef all
swhi lethewat erspray edon
them drenchi
ngt hem.Kennybendedt yingher
shoelacesasEsi trail
edbehi ndt hem alltaking
photos.Shewentcl osertotheedget ryingt ogeta
goodshot ,waterspr ayedonhershet ookast ep
backunabl etoseet hensl i
ppedont hewetpat h
droppingthephone.Kennyt ur nedatt hescr eam and
l
ookedbehi ndbutshecoul dn’tseeany t
hi ng.
Herhear
tski
pped.“
Esi
?”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#145

Kennylookedaheadandfrowned.Shecoul
dn’
tsee
anyoneatsight
.Shewalkedback.
“
Esi
!”
“
Kenny
,hel
pme.
”
KennylookedatEsithenwalkedovergoingt
othe
edge.Shefrownedattheheavywaterfl
ushesthen
pul
ledMoesi up.Shedraggedherf
rom thewater
andlookedather.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
“
It
’spai
nful
..
”Sher
ubbedherbel
l
ysoaked.
“
Weshoul
dgoback.
”
“
Wher
eisev
ery
one?
”
“
Gone.Let
’sgoback.
”
“
Ngng…no.Let
’sgo.
”
“
Moesi
,whati
fsomet
hingi
swr
ong?
”
“
Not
hingi
swr
ong.I
t’
sfi
ne.Let
’sgo.
”
Shehelpedherup,
Kennyl
ookedatherbl
eedi
ng
knee.
“
Esi
Ithi
nkweshoul
dgoback.
”
“
Iam notgoi
ngt
orui
nthi
sfory
ou.Let
’sgo.
”
“Welly
ouaregoi
ngtorui
nitf
orev
ery
onei
fany
thi
ng
happenst
othatbaby
.”
“
Ok.Iwi
l
lgobackal
one.Youcanj
oint
hem.
”
Kennyr
oll
edherey
esthenputherar
m aroundher
andhel
pedherwal
kastheywentback.

*
**

Atthepr
ivat
ehospi
tal,
Kennyst
oodbesidesEsi
’
s
bedasthenurseat
tendedt
oherknee.
“
Youar
egoi
ngt
obef
ine.
”
“
Ok.
”
Kennyl
ookedatt
henur
se.“
Shef
ell
,canwedoan
ul
tr
asoundt
omakesur
ethebabyi
sfi
ne.
”
“Wecanbutatt
hemomentourgy
naei
snot
avai
l
abl
e.”
“
Sot
her
eisnoonewhocan-
“
Esi
hel
dKenny
’shand.“
Kenny
…”
Thenur
sesmi
l
ed.“
Butwehav
eourseni
ordoct
or,
he
candoi
t.”
Esi
smi
l
ed.“
Ok,
thanky
ou.
”
Thenursewalkedout
.Esil
etgoofEsi
andrubbed
herbump.Theysil
ent
lywai
tedint
hepri
vat
ewar d.
Esil
ookedatKenny.
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Kennyt
ookof
fhercap.“
It
’sok.
”
“
Theymustbel
ooki
ngf
orusgoi
ngcr
azy
.”
Kennychuckl
ed.“
Ican’
tbel
iev
eRonadi
dn’
tev
en
noti
cethatIwasbehi
nd.Mxm.”
Esi
smi
l
ed.“
Whataboutme?Nooneev
ennot
iced.
”
“
Whatwer
eyoudoi
ngbehi
ndev
ery
oneel
se?
”
“
Myf
eet
…”
Kennylookedatherswol
l
enf
eett
hensi
ghedast
hey
cont
inuedtowait.

*
**

InMaun, Miasmi l
edastheygotof ft
hepl ane.Ora
heldherwaistholdingSam’shandwhi leFif
istood
alone.Theywalkedt ot
herentalcarchatti
ngwi t
hFifi
walkingbehi
ndt hem.Theyallgotinthecar ,
Fifi
with
Sam attheback.Mi aputonherseat belt
.
“
Thatwasf
un.
”
Or
aleanedov
erandki
ssedher
.
“
Yeah,
weshoul
dgetsomef
ood.
”
“
Yes.Iam hungr
y.”
Oradr
ovetoafastf
oodr
est
aur
antt
hent
heyal
l
st
eppedout.
“
Mia,
canwet
alk?
”
Mi
atur
nedt
oFi
fiasOr
alookedt
oo.
“
Fif
i,cany
ou-
“
“
Nobabei
t’
sok.Goonwi
thSam.
”
Or
alookedather
.“Ar
eyousur
e?”
“
Yes.
”
Orawal
kedinsidet
her
est
aur
antwi
thSam t
henMi
a
l
ookedatFi
fi.
“
HowcanIhel
pyou?
”
“Iam goingtotalktoyouwomant owoman,Ihav
e
nothi
ngagai nstyou.Matt
eroffact
,Ihav
eno
probl
em wi t
hy oummeIam aski ngyouto
understandwhereIam standi
ngf r
om.Sam
deservesa-“
“Pl
easedon’ tembarrassy ourself.YouandOr anot
beingtogetherwon’tmeanSam won’ thaveapr oper
family
.Idon’tknowwhof il
ledy ourheadwi t
hthat
nonsensebutSam canst i
llgett heloveevenifher
parentsarenottogether.Oral ovesSam justli
keI
beli
evey ouloveher
, t
hat’senough.Sam wi l
l
understandthatmamaanddaddycan’ tbetogether.
Iknowy oupr obablyfantasizedabouty ouraisi
ng
Sam wi thOr ali
keacoupl e,Iknowy ouwi l
ldo
anythingt ohav ehim, eveni fi
tmeansshar inghim
withhisot herbabymamabuty ouneedt oaccept
thatthelov eisov er.I
fOr alov edyouorev en
Natasha, hewoul dhav elongcomet oy oubutr at
her
hehadanewgi rl
fri
endev er
ysi ngl
et i
meandwheni t
wasov erhewoul dcomebackt oyoutwobecause
yourlegswer ealway sopenf orhim.Don’tbet hat
woman, youar egoi ngtot urnintoabi t
terbaby
mamaandpr obablyhav ey oudaught erhateme
whenIdi dn’
tdonot hi
ngwr ongt oyou.Acceptt hi
ngs
youcan’ tchangeandmov eonwi t
hy ourli
fe.You
don’thav etobegf orlove.”
“Youdon’
tunder
standbecausey
oudon’
thav
ea
chil
d.”
“Idon’
thavetohav eachi l
dtounder standt hata
mandoesn’ tl
ovey ou.Oradoesn’tlovey ouorhi s
otherbabymamaandt hat’
sthetruth.Iam t r
yingto
becivi
lwithyou,Idon’twantdramabuti fyouar e
goingtogivemeanat t
itudeIwil
lreturnt hesame
energytoyou.Thingsar eaboutt
ochange, alotof
thingsareabouttochangeandt heyaregoingto
startchangi
ngnow.Ber eadyforitandifIwereyouI
woul dstar
tlooki
ngforajob.
”
Miaturnedandwal kedinsi
det herestaur
ant.Fif
i
stoodther
eandwat chedthem playhappyfami l
ies
withherdaughter
.Tear sfi
ll
edherey esanddr opped
tohercheeks.Shehadnev erseenhiml i
ket
hatand
i
thurttoevenwat ch.Sheturnedandwal kedbackt o
thecar.

*
**

KennywalkedwithEsi
insi
det
helodge,
theypaused
st
aringatever
yonewhil
eRonaspokeonthephone.
Tshenol
ogotup.
“
Wher
ewer
eyouguy
s?”
Ev
ery
onet
urnedt
othem.Ronahungupandwal
ked
ov
er.
“
Wher
edi
dyoudi
sappeart
o?”
“
Esi
fel
lsoIt
ookhert
othehospi
tal
.”
Maat
lawal
kedov
ert
henhuggedEsi
.“Ar
eyouok?
”
“
Yes.Iam f
ine.
”
“
Whathappened?
”
“Isl
i
ppedonthewetpat
h.Kennyhelpedme.We
coul
dn’tseey
ouguyssowedecidedtogotothe
hospit
al.
”
“
Ok.Iwaswor
ri
ed.
”
Peolookedov
er.“
Ever
yonewas.Wet
houghty
ougot
eat
enbyawi l
danimal
.”
Ronal
ookedatKenny
.“Canwet
alkbabe?
”
Het
ookherhandandl
edhert
othei
rroom.
“
Wecoul
dn’
tseey
ouguy
sany
mor
e.”
“Youknewwecoul dn’thavebeenfar,
Iwaswor ri
ed
sickaboutyou.Any t
hingcouldhavehappenedto
youorEsi.Youcoul dhav eshout
edournames
Keneilwe,wecouldhav eheardyou.Youjustdon’
t
disappearli
kethat
.”
“
YaanongkeKenei
l
we?(
SonowIam Kenei
l
we?
)”
Hel
ookedatherandsi
ghed.“
Babe,
all
Iam say
ingi
s
thatyoucouldal
ert
edus.Iwaswor
ried.Iwas
scared.Youcoul
dhavescreamedf
ormynameandI
wouldhav ehear
dyou.
”
Shelookedathisfaceandsmil
ed.“Iam sor
ry.You
arer
ight.Ishoul
dhavealer
tedyou.
”
“
Arey
ouokt
hough?
”
“
Iam f
ine.Esi
isf
ine.Shei
shav
ingagi
rl
.”
“
That
’sni
ce.Thanky
ouf
orhel
pingher
.”
“
Iam notal
lev
il
.”
Heunzi
ppedhi
spant
s.Kennyf
rowned.
“
Uhh-
“
“Ihavebeenst r
essedthepasthourand30mi nutes.
Icouldn’tthinkcl
earl
ybecauseIwast hinki
ngmay be
somet hinghappenedt omywi fe.Ideservethis.I
mor ethandeser vethi
sascompensat ionformy
worry.Mat teroffact
,Ienti
tledtoi t.Imarri
edy ou.
Youar emywi feandIam angr yf orthefactthatyou
j
ustdi sappearedonmel i
ket hat.Ineedt ofl
ush
downt hatangerandIwi l
lfucki tintoyou.”
Kennyl
ookedathi
m sur
pri
singl
yar
oused.Het
ook
offhert-shir
tandherbr athenpulledherdownher
shortti
ght sandpantieswhilesheki ckedof fher
shoes.HeFr enchkissedhersqueezi ngherbr easts.
Kennyputherhandi nsidehispantsandt ouchedhi s
harddickget ti
ngmor earoused.Hepi ckedherup
andputheront hebedt aki
ngof fhist -shi
rt
.Het ook
outhisdi ckandsmackedhercl otbef oreblocki
ng
herentrance.Ronaki ssedherandbur iedhimself
deepinherpussy .Hepausedki ssinghert hen
pressedherl egstoherchestlookingi nherey es
and…

*
**

I
ntheotherroom,Esismil
edshowi
ngMaat
lat
he
pi
ctur
esfrom theul
tr
asound.
“
It
’sagi
rl
!”
“
Damny
es!
”
Esil
aughedhappi
l
y.“
Iknow.Ican’
twai
tfort
his
babe.
”
Maatl
alookedatthepict
ureswi
thasmil
e.Fi
nal
l
y
Sapphi
rewasalsogoingtohaveasi
ster
.
“
Thanky
ouf
ort
his.
”
Esi
smi
l
ed.“
No,
yout
hanky
ou.
”
“
Tomor
rowIam goi
ngt
ochai
nyout
omyhand.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Ok.
”
Maat
laputt
hepi
ctur
esdown.“
Comeher
eandsi
t.
”
Shesatdown.Maat
lagotupandgotsomet
hing
fr
om hi
sbag.
“Il
ov eyou.Iam sor
ryIhurtyoubefore.Idon’thave
anexcusef orit
.Thepastyearsmademer eali
ze
thereisonlyonewomanf ormeandt hatwomani s
you.Ipromisey out
histi
mear ounditwillbe
diff
erentbabe,Isweari
twill
bedi f
ferent.
”Hesl owly
wentdownonhi skneeandtookoutt hering.
“
It
’stheol
dri
ng,
Ihadi
tre-
pol
i
shedandr
e-desi
gned.
Wil
lyoumarr
ymebabe?”
Tear
sfi
ll
edEsi
’
sey
esasshel
ookedathi
m downon
hi
sknee.
“
Ilov
eyout
oo…y
es…”
Maatl
asmi
l
edwi
thr
eli
efandsl
i
ppedt
her
ingonher
f
inger
.
“
Wear
egoi
ngt
ohav
eabi
gweddi
ng.
”
Esishookherhead.“
Ngng,
somet
hingsmal
land
cozy.
”
“
Iwantever
yonetoseet
hatIam mar
ri
edbabe.I
wantsomet
hingbi
g.”
“
Ngng,
that
’snotgoi
ngt
ohappen.
”
“
Aowbabymma?
”
“Yes.Somethi
ngnicewit
hfr
iendsandfamil
y.Now
allIwanti
stogiv
ebirt
handmay behissmywayto
thegym.Kanagatwekenoga.(Appar
entl
yIam a
snake.)
Theyl
aughed.
“Am It
heonlyonewhowasl ooki
ngatEma’
ski
ds
expect
ingoneofthem t
olookli
keRona?
”
“Il
ookedf
orhert
heti
meafterwebumpedint
oher
atthemal
ltoj
ustmakesur
e.All
herchi
l
drenaref
or
t
hatguy
.”
“
Tal
kaboutr
eli
ef.
”

*
**

Qwat chedastheki dsswum whilehet extedonhi s

phonelyingonthelaungersippi
nghi sjuice.He
rai
sedhisheadandl ookedasLarrygotoutoft he
poolthenheranov erfrom ashortdi
stancet hrowi
ng
himselfbacki
nt hewat er.Qwentbackt ohi sphone.
Hefrownedasi trangt henhepi
ckedt hef oreigncal
l.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
HeyQ,
it’
smama.Howar
eyouguy
s?”
Qsmi
l
ed.“
Wear
efi
ne.
”
“
Ok.Ihopeyouar
enotpl
ayi
ngv
ideogamest
he
whol
eday.”
“
No.
”
“Ok,Ij
ustwant
edtocheckuponyou.Makesurethe
kidsal
waysbehav
eanddon’tl
eav
et hem al
onefor
t
ool
ong.
”
“
Ok.
”
“
Letmespeakt
othem.
”
Qlookedatther
ti
plest
s.“
Guys!Mamawant
sto
speaktoyouonthephone.
”
Theyal lgotoutoft
hepool,Waronawal kedoverl
ast
untuckingherpantyfr
om herbuttlastt
henQhanded
them thephone.Theyspoketot heirmotherf
ora
coupleofmi nutest
henQgothi sphoneback.
“
Ok,
bye.
”
“Mama,
whenar
eyoupay
ingmef
orwashi
ngy
our
car
?”
Hi
smot
herl
aughed.“
What
?”
“
Iwashedyourcart
heot
herdayandnnaIdon’
twor
k
f
orf
ree.”
“Butwhoaskedyout
owashmycar?Inev
erasked.I
thoughty
ouweredoi
ngi
tbecauset
hat
’swhatgood
sonsdo.”
“
No.Youcarwast
oodi
rt
y.Iwantmymoney
.”
“
Ok,
howmuchi
sit
?”
“
P150.
”
Kennyl
aughed.“
What
?”
“
Yes.I
twast
oodi
rt
y.”
“OkQuint
on.YouwantP150?Fine.Whi l
eIgiveyou
yourmoney,pl
easepaymemywat erthatyouused,
mysoapt haty
ouused,mywashingr agsthatyou
used,
mybucket …every
thi
ngyouusedwasmi ne.
Eventhespaceyouusedwashingthatcarismineso
whenIarri
vepleasehavemymoney .
”
Qhear
dhisfat
herspeaki
ngi
nthebackgr
ound.
“
What’
sgoingon?”
“KanababeQi
schar
gingmeP150f
orwashi
ngmy
car.
”
“
Duel
angwana.(
Payt
hechi
l
d.)
”
“
P150?
”
“
Yourcarwasdi
rt
y.Isawi
ttoo.
”
“
Hissi
bli
ngsspi
l
ledt
hingsonmyseat
s!”
“
Payhi
m hi
smoney
.”
“
Youpayhi
m.”
“Ngng,who’
scarwashed,
mineory
our
sbabe?Pay
him hi
smoney.
”
Kennylaughed.“
Youar
esupposedt
ohav
emy
back.
”
“Payt
hechi
l
d.OngameKenny
.(Youar
est
ingy
Kenny
.)”
“
Iam notst
ingy
.”
“
Youar
e.”
“
Mxm.OkQ,
Iwi
l
lpayy
out
hemoney
.”
Qhi
ttheai
rexci
tedl
y.“
Thanky
ou.
”
“Youcant
aket
hemoneyf
rom t
hemoneybox.Onl
y
P150.
”
“
Youar
ethebestmom.
”
Shedr
oppedthecal
lthenbrowsedthoughhi
sphone
l
ooki
ngforwhathecouldbuyforSadi
’sbi
rt
hday
.

FI
VEYEARSLATER
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#146

Fi
veYear
sLat
er.
..

Qfoldedhi
scl
othesshov
ingthem inhi
sbag, he
l
ookedattheti
meonhisphonet hencont
inued
packi
ng.Hi
sroommatewalkedin.
“
Q!”
“
Lai
taka,
keat
samay
a.(
Iam goi
ng.
)”
“
War
ewakaekant
e?(
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
)”
“
KeaMaun,(
Iam goi
ngtoMaun,
)myaunti
sget
ti
ng
mar
ri
edtomorr
ow.Ihav
etobether
e.”
“
Andy
ourf
olksal
readyl
eft
?”
“
Yeah.
“
NnaIwi
l
lgohomet
omor
row.TodayIam t
ir
ed.
”
Qlaughedcl
osi
nghi
sbagt
henhehungi
tov
erhi
s
shoul
der.
“
Sur
esur
e!”
Hewal
kedoutdi
ali
ngSadi
.
“
Heybabe…”
“
Q…”
“
Wher
ear
eyou?Iam l
eav
ingr
ightnow.
”
“Iam al
soleavi
ng.Ei
shbabe,Idon’tl
i
kethishi
ki
ng
thi
ng.KooreIhaveneverdoneitandIhavehear
d
badstori
es.”
“Kanammei t’
sthefast
est
.Gapethosest
ori
esar
e
j
ustfake.Peopl
ehikeever
yday
.Let’
smeetby
Taung.”
“
Ok.
”
Hedroppedt
hecal
landwentt
othebusst
oppi
cki
ng
acal
l
.
“
Beaut
if
ul…”
“
War
eot
lal
engner
ra?(
Whenar
eyoucomi
ng?
)”
“
Iam onmywayt
othehi
ki
ngspot
.”
“
Q,whydon’
tyouj
ustt
aket
hebus.Idon’
tli
ket
his
hi
ki
nggame.What
’swr
ongwi
tht
hebus?
”
“
Comeonbeaut
if
ul,
Iam good.Don’
tst
resst
oo
much.
”
“
Nowi
magi
neIam goi
ngt
obest
ressedf
orhour
s.”
“
Don’
tst
ress.Iwi
l
lbet
her
einnot
ime.
”
“
Ngwetsi
yameekae?(
Wher
eismydaught
eri
n-
l
aw?)
”
“Wearemeet i
ngatTaung.Wewil
lprobabl
yarr
ive
superl
ate.Iam sogl
adthi
sisnothappeni
ngat
Shakawe.”
“
Met
oo.Iam sogl
adt
hatev
enOr
aisf
rom Maun.
”
“
Soshei
shav
ingt
heweddi
ngatt
hegar
den?
”
“
Yes.Yesandit
’ssobeaut
if
ul.Thati
deaofy
our
sdi
d
wonder
stotheplace.
”
“
Ok.Wewi
l
ltal
kwhenwegett
ranspor
t.
”
“
Becar
eful
ok?Bev
erycar
eful
.”
“
Ok.
”
Hehungupget
ti
ngi
nthecombi
thenheset
tl
ed
besideahighschool studentwhowasr eadi
nga
novelwearingspect
acl es.Sheatehernicknaks
sil
entl
ywhilehescrolledonhi sphone.Shestopped
thecombi atthenextbusst op,Qsteppedoutthen
shegotoff.Herfri
endwhowassi tt
ingatthe
backseatcall
edherasshef ixedherski
rt.
“Kaone,osekawal
ebal
atl
hemmawena.(
Kaone,
don’tf
orget
.)
”
“
Ok.
”
Herv oi
cewassosof titforcedhi mt ol ookather
face.Shepaidt hedr
ivert henQj umpedbacki nthe
combi st
aringather.Heshookhi sheadt henwent
backonhi sphone.Awhi lelaterhest eppedoutof
thecombi thenwalkedt owar dst heTaungbusst op
whereaf ewpeopl ewer est anding.Mi nuteslat
erhe
sawSadi walkingoverdr aggingherbag.Hesmi led
stari
ngatherthenhehuggedher .
“
Hey
..
”
“
Hey
…youl
ookgood.Il
i
key
ourhai
rcut
.”
“
Thanks.Il
i
key
ourhai
rtoo.
”
A4x4Legend50stoppedthenQrushedover
.The
dr
iverr
oll
eddownhiswindowandfixedhi
scap
“
Maun!
”
“
Yes.Babe!Ar
eye!(
Let
sgo.
)”
Twomenwalkedoveral
socarry
ingthei
rbagsas
Sadi
appr
oached.Thedr
iverl
ookedatthemen.
“
Maunbont
ate!
”
“KeaRakops(
Iam goi
ngt
oRakops)butIwi
l
lpayt
he
amountforMaun.
”
“
NnakeaMaun.
”
“
Ok.
”
Thedr
iversteppedoutthenputtheirbagsatthebag.
Onemanj umpedi natthefr
ontpassengerseatwhil
e
QandSadi gotinatthebackwiththeotherman.
Thedr
ov ergotbackinhiscarandlookedattheback
“Aowmaj i
ta!Lookathowt hisgi
rli
s.”Helookedat
theothermanatt heback.“Kanawenabray ouhav e
abigbody,thegirli
ssquashedintothecorner.How
aboutyouletyourgirl
takethefr
ontseatsot hatshe
cansitcomfortabl
y?”Hesaidlooki
ngatQ.“ Kana
shel
ooksuncomf
ort
abl
ether
e.”
Ql
ookedatSadiwhowasi
nthemi
ddl
e.“
Yougood
wi
tht
hatbabe?”
“
Yeah.
”
Themanatthefr
ontseatexchangedseat
swi
thSadi
thent
heyal
lset
tl
ed.
“
Ok,
offwego!Byt
heway
,Iam Lef
a.”
“
Sadi
…”
“
Qui
nton.
”
“
NnakennaOmpi
l
e.”
“
Mynamei
sAl
ber
t.
”
Lefasmi
led.“
Ok,Sadi
,Quint
on,Ompi
l
eandAl
ber
t.
Nicemeeti
ngyouall
.Let
’sgo.”
Het ookoffjoi
ningtheroad.Saditur
nedtoQ
worriedl
y,i
tdidn’tmakehercomf ort
abl
ebei ngin
thatcarwithtwost r
angemen.Thedr iv
erlookedok
butthetwomenseat edwithQgav ehersomev i
bes
shecouldn’tunderst
and.Shesighedwor r
iedly
l
ooki ngaheadthentextedQ.
Sadi
:BabeIhav
eabadf
eel
i
ng.
Q:
What
’swr
ong?
Sadi
:Thoset
woguy
stheyseem cr
eepyhel
a.
Q:Youarejustnotcomf
ort
abl
ewi
thhi
ki
ng,
they
seem ok.Justr
elax.
Sadiputdownherphone.Ompi lest art
eda
conversat
iontalki
ngabouttheleague.Theyall
j
oinedinchattingwhil
eSadiremai nedsil
ent
.
Tensionslowlymeltedastheguy salll
aughed
toget
hertalki
ngmor efoot
ball
.

*
**

Orawal
kedi
nsi
det
hehot
elbari
nMaunwher
ethe
guyswer
e.
“
Mar
ri
edt
obe!
”
Theylaughedthenhesatdownwi
tht
hem.“
DamnI
can’
twaitfort
omor r
ow.”
Ronanodded.“
Tomor
rowi
syourday
!Tomor
rowi
s
y
ourt
imet
oshi
ne.
”
At
sil
elaughed.“
Shi
nebr
ight
ert
hanev
ery
oneel
se.
”
PusoandLebi
tsol
aughedtoot
henrai
sedthei
r
dr
inks,
thei
rweddi
ngbendsonthei
rfi
nger
s.
“
Cheer
stomar
ri
edl
i
fe!
”
Oragothi
sdr
inkandsi
ppedasAt
sil
elookedatt
he
door
.
“
Hol
yshi
t!
”
Theguy sturnedtot
hethreel
adi
est
hathadjust
walkedin.Lebit
sowhist
ledmesmer
izedbyt
heir
beauty.
“
Shi
t!
”
Rona’sey esf
ellononewhowasqui etwhil
ethetwo
chattedloudl
ylaughing.Hecouldt
elltheywerefrom
workbyl ooki
ngatt heblackandwhitetheywere
wearing.Theyturnedtothem, t
hequietonetur
ning
thelast.Shequickl
ylookedawayasRonasi ppedhis
dri
nk.
“
Iwoul
dtapt
hat
.”
RonalookedatAt
sil
einshock.“
Youhavestar
ted.
Ebeobatlagonor
rheaaker
e?(Youwantgonorr
hea
ri
ght
?)”
Theguy
slaughedwhi
l
eLebi
tsoey
edt
hel
oudest
.
“
Iwoul
dsmasht
hel
oudone.
”
Pusonodded.“
Met
oo.
”
Rona’
sphonevi
brat
edfr
om thet
able.Her
eached
andsmil
edatamessagethenhegotup.
“Gents,Iam afr
aidIhav et
oleavey ou.Mma
Mot samaiiswaiti
ngf orme.Ora,goodluck!Marri
ed
l
ifeisawesome.Youcanadmi r
ef r
om afarbutdon’t
touch.Nothingwrongi nadmir
ingbeautywheny ou
seei t
,theprobl
em startswhenyougett oocuri
ous.
Seey outomor r
ow.”
Hewalkedoutwi thhiscanandgotinhiscar.He
noti
cedthequietgir
lwalkingouthol
dingherbag
whil
etal
kingont hephone, herhi
psswayi
ngf r
om
si
detoside.Hest ar
tedhiscaranddroveoffpassi
ng
herwhil
edial
ingMaat la.
*
**

AtKefil
we’
shouse,
Kefi
l
wewal kedi
nsi
det hehouse
holdi
ngtwogl
assesofj
uiceandwenti
nsidethe
room wher
eKennywaslaughi
ngwit
hMi a.
“
Mygi
rl
s!Ibr
oughty
ousomet
hingt
odr
ink.
”
Kefi
lehandedthem theglasses,
Kennylookedatt
he
dri
nksuspici
ously
.Af t
erwhatmmagweTumoonce
tol
dheraboutKefil
wet ry
ingtopoisonMmamat hen
acci
dental
lydri
nki
ngherpoi son,shecoul
dn’
ttr
ust
anyt
hingthatcamefrom her.
Kefilwenoti
cedthensmi l
edt ear
full
y.“I
t’
sfineifyou
don’twanttodr i
nkKenny.Idon’tblamey ou.ButI
hav echanged,Igotochur chnow.Imetamanwho
l
ov esGodandIhav echanged.It
’shardt obel
ieveit
butIhav etr
ulychanged.Ittookti
me, Ihadsomuch
angerinmyhear t.Il
etthatangercont r
olme.You
aremydaught erandIam pr oudoft hewomany ou
grewupt obeev enthoughIwasn’ taround.Iam
happyy ouhadmymot herbecausei fi
twasn’tfor
herIdon’tknowwhatwoul dhavehappenedt oy ou.
Til
lnowIam st
il
lheal
ing,
hopef
ull
yonedayyou
for
giveme.
”Shesmi l
ed.“
Sasal
ooksalotl
ikey
ou.
”
Kennysmi
l
edt
ryi
ngt
ohol
dbackhert
ear
s.“
She
does.
”
“
Youhav
ebeaut
if
ulki
ds.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”
Atearr
oll
eddownKefil
we’scheekt
henshewal
ked
out
.MiarubbedKenny
’sback.
“
Arey
ouok?
”
“
Iam f
ine.
”
Kenny
’sphonev
ibr
atedt
henshegotup.
“
Ronai
sher
e.”
“
Ok,
seey
out
omor
row.
”
“
Ok.
”
Theyhuggedt
henshewalkedoutinherGerman
pri
ntdr
essandheel
s.OneofMia’srel
ati
vesst
opped
her.
“
HiKenny
.”
“
Hi.
.”
“Ihear
dyouownabusiness.Ihav
ebeenl ookingf
or
ajobfor10year
snowandIev enlosthope.Ihave
anMBA.Ialsohaveadipl
omai nfi
nance…”
Kennyli
stenedasMi
a’
scousi
ncont
inuedt
osel
l
her
self
.

*
**

Outside,moreofMia’
srel
ativesfrom herfather
’s
famil
yf i
l
ledtheyar
dchatti
ng.Mi a’sstepsist
er
walkedint hr
ought
hegatestill
dr essedinherwork
clot
hest henherol
dersi
sterhurri
edov er.
“
Wher
eisy
ourcar
?”
“Idon’
thavepet rol
Peggy.Ican’
tbelieveyoucame
heretoday.Youwer enevercl
oset oMia, y
ounev er
evenspoket oherallt
hispastyears.Youhat edher
becauseofwhataunt ytoldusaboutKef il
webut
todayhereyouar ewit
hallyourkidstry
ingt ofeed
offthi
sweddi ng.Youmakeusl ookpat heti
c.
I
magi
newhatpeopl
ear
esay
ingaboutus.
”
Peggyrol
l
edhereyes.“Mi
aismysister,weshare
thesamebloodRor
isang,
Iam notgoingtostar
ve
whenmysi st
eri
sgetti
ngmarr
ied.
”
Oneoft
heircousi
nswalkedover.“
Bat
hongl
ookat
t
hedzaddyinthatcar
!Gatwestayawayf
rom ol
d
menbutlookatoldmen!”
Theyallt
urnedtothecarthatwaspar kedatthegat
e,
thedri
verwasoutonhi sphone.Hewashandsome,
sohandsomet heycouldn’
tgettheireyesof
fhim.
Rori
sangimmedi at
elynoti
cedhim, herai
sedhis
headandturnedtothem.Shequi cklyl
ookedaway.
“
Stopst
ari
ngl
ona!
”
“Hei
stheshi
tbat
hongbaj
ehov
a!Iwoul
dn’
tmi
nd
him.
”
“Heismar
ried.Peggyt
ake.
.”Rori
sangtookout
somemoneyandhandedi ttoher
.“Thereyougo.I
am goi
ng.
”
Shetur
nedandwalkedoutmakingsur
enoonesaw
herf
ace,shedi
dn’
twanttobelabel
edasachancer
j
ustl
ikesheknewt
heywer
eal
readyl
abel
i
ngher
ol
dersi
ster
.
Aladywalkedinf
rontofherwear i
ngredbot toms
whil
erocki
ngherbodyhuggi ngGer manpr i
ntdr ess.
Shewalkedli
keamodel ,
soef f
ortl
essinthoseheel s.
HerBrazi
li
anweaver eachedherbackshini ng.
Rori
sangwatchedassheappr oachedthemanher
cousi
nhadbeendr ooli
ngov erthentheykissedas
shepassedthem.

*
**

Kennysmi
l
edasRonal
ookedatherasmi
l
e.
“
Nkar
enkagony
alagape.
”
Kennybl
ushedgi
ggl
i
ng.“
Mar
rymeagai
nthen,
no
oneisst
oppingy
ou.
.”
Sheputherhandsonherchestki
ssi
nghim asthe
ki
dswalkedover.Lar
onaandSaronagoti
nt hecar
.
Kennyl
ookedaroundthenl
ookedatWawa.
“
Wher
eisSasa?
”
“
Shewentt
othet
uckshopwi
thsomegi
rl
.”
“
What
?”
“
Itol
dhernott
ogobutshewentwi
thher
.”
“
When?
”
“
Tenmi
nut
esback.
”
Kennyt
ookoutherphoneandcal
l
edSasa.

*
**

Meanwhil
eSaronawal kedwi
ththeneighbor’
s16
yearol
ddaughterbacktoKefi
lwe’
shousechat t
ing
whil
eeati
ngFrenchfri
es.Herphonerangfrom her
pocket
.
“
Hel
l
o”
“
Sarona,
wear
egoi
ng.Ineedy
ouher
eint
wo
minut
es.
”
“
Ok.
”
Sheputherphonei
nherj
eanpocket
.“Ihav
etogo
home.Mamasay
swear
egoi
ng.
”
Acarwi
thti
ntedwi
ndowsst
oppednextt
othem t
hen
t
hedri
verr
oll
eddownhiswi
ndoweyei
ngthegi
rl
s.
“
Boshushu,
lakae?(
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
)”
The16yearol
dlookedatt
hedr
ivershy
ly.“
Wear
e
goi
nghome.”
“
Ok,
letmedr
opy
ouof
f.
”
The16y
earol
dgoti
nthecart
henl
ookedatSasa.
“
Sasa,
let’
sgo.Aker
eyourmom i
swai
ti
ngf
ory
ou,
wewil
lreacht
heref
ast
er.
”
Thedroversmil
ed.“YeahSasa,
wewil
lreacht
her
e
fast
er.Iam j
ustgoi
ngt odr
opyouof
f.
”
.
.
.
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#147

“
No.Iam f
ine.Iwi
l
lwal
k.By
e…”
Shewalkedawaymov i
ngfast.Minut
eslat
ershe
appr
oachedthecarandgotin.Kennytur
nedtoher
.
“
Wher
ewer
eyou?
”
“
Iwentt
obuysomef
ri
es.
”
“Sasa,
wespokeaboutt his.Youjustdon’
tgo
anywherewit
hstranger
s.Whati fsomethi
ng
happenedtoyou?Whydi dn’tyoutel
lmey ouwer
e
goingout?
”
“
Iam sor
ry.
”
“Pl
easecanitnothappenagai
n.Wedon’
tknow
anyoneher
e.”
“
Ok.
”
Ronast art
edthecarandrev
ersedthendrov
eof f
headedt othehot
eltheywerestay
ingin.Mi
nutes
l
atertheysteppedoutandwalkedinthehot
el.The
kidsgotintheroom besi
dest
hei
rpar
ent
s.Kenny
tookoffherheels.
“
Arey
ougoi
ngbackt
otheguy
s?”
Hewal
kedov
erandki
ssedher
.“No…”
Kennysmi
l
ed.“Ok…Iam goi
ngt
oshower
.Wecan
watchamovi
eafter
.”
“
Iwi
l
llookf
orone.
”
Sheundressedthenwal kedinsi
dethebathroom and
tookaquickshower.Shewal kedoutminutesl at
er
withatowelwrappedar oundherbodythenlooked
atRonawhowasnowl yingonthebedshirt
less
holdi
ngtheTVr emote.Herphoner angfr
om t hebed
thenshereachedforitandpicked.
“
Mmagwengwet
siy
ame…(
Mydaught
eri
n-l
aw’
s
mot
her
.)
”
Sadimot
herlaughed.“
Hey,Ijustwant
edtot
ell
you
tohavet
hatsmaller
’nyanatalkl
eSadi.
”
“
Okbabes.
”
“
Thanksmothowame.Nnahonest
lyIam notr
eady
t
obeagrandmother
.”
Kennylaughed.“Heel
a,me!Iam scar
ed.Kanawhen
Qfini
sheshewi l
l bej
oini
nghi
sf at
herkoRealEstat
e,
Ihear
dhi mtalki
ngaboutgett
ingmarri
edafter
.”
“EvenSadimenti
onedit
.Asl
ongasshedoesn’
tget
pregnantnowIam good.
”
“
Yeah,
Iwi
l
ltal
ktoher
.”
“
Okt
hanks.
”
Sadi’
smot herdroppedthecall
,Kennyloti
onedt hen
putonashor tnightdr
essbeforejoi
ningRonainbed.
Ronapulledherinhisarmsasherni ghtdressroll
ed
over.Hetouchedherbar eski
nkissi
ngher .He
pausedandl ookedinhereyes.Kennysmiledmaki ng
hi
m smi l
etoo.
“
Whati
sit
?”
Heshookhishead.“Justt
hinki
nghowl uckyIam t
o
haveyou.GodknowsIcouldlostyouyearsback
wheny ouwenttojai
landhereyouare…Ididn’
teven
thi
nkyouwouldtakemeback.Iwasj usttaki
ng
chanceshonest
ly.
”
Kennyt
ouchedhi
scheekashespoket
oher
.
“
Ireal
l
ythoughtIhadl
osty
ou.
”
Shesmi
l
ed.Ronaki
ssedhersof
tl
y.
“
Doy
ouknowhowmuchIl
ovey
ou?
”
Shenoddedbi
ti
ngherl
owerl
i
p.
“
Ilov
eyoumor
ethant
hoseki
ds.
”
Kennyl
aughed.“
What
?”
“Yeah.Il
ovemykidsbutIwoul
dchooseyoui
nany
day.Gapethosepeopl
eareol
denough.
”
Theybot
hlaughed.
“Il
oveyousomuchMmaMot samai.Iam cr
azyin
l
ovewi t
hyou.I
fIcouldgobackinti
me, Iwouldst
il
l
chooseyoubabe.Youwer emadeforme.Idon’t
thi
nkitwoul
dhavebeent hesamehadImet
someoneelsenotyou.”
Kennylookedathi
m ashespoketosof
tl
ytoher,
his
voicedoi
ngsomethingt
oher.“
Itwoul
dn’
thavebeen
thesame.”
Hesmiled,shewassti
ll
beaut
if
ul.Morematurebut
beaut
if
ul.Shewasjustl
ikewi
ne.Shegotbett
eras
theyear swentbyandhecoul dn’thelpbutf eellucky
tohav eher .Ronakissedherslowlyset tl
ingbet ween
herlegs.Ther ewast hi
snicenesst hatalway scame
withfeelingherr i
ngonhisbareski n.Thiswashi s
gir
landt her ewasnochangi ngthat .Kennyranhi s
handsonhi sbackasheki ssedherhar der,t
heki ss
getti
ngmor ei nt
ense.Hetookofft henightdr ess
andki ssedherneckgoi ngdownt oherbr east.He
shookt hem t hennibbl
edoneachasshemoaned
rubbinghi shead.
Herai
sedhi sheadandkissedhertaki
ngouthi
sdick.
Heranitupanddownhersl itasshemoanedsoft
ly
t
henheki ssedherpushi
ngin.
Shest
oppedki
ssinghi
m cl
osi
ngherey
esashesank
deepi
n.“
Ronaaa….”
“
Fucky
oust
il
lfeel
amazi
ng…”
Hest
art
edr
ocki
ngherbodymaki
ngsl
owsweetl
ove
t
oherasamovi
epl
ayedonTv..

*
**
Earli
erintheeveni
ng, Mi
asatintheroom lyi
ngon
thebedpr essi
ngherphone.Shecur i
ouslysear
ched
forTshepoonf acebookthenscrol
leddownhi s
ti
mel i
ne.Shesmi l
edstari
ngathispict
ureswith
somewomanandachi l
d.Shefoundherself
recal
li
ngt heti
mest heyhadhadtogetherthenshe
shookherheadwi thasmi l
eleavi
nghistimeli
ne.Her
phoner ang.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Hey,Ij
ustsentyouSam’shai
rst
yleonwhatsapp.
Wej
ustarri
ved.Iwil
ldr
opherofftomor
row
mor
ning.
”
“
Ok.Thanky
ouf
orbr
ingi
ngher
.”
“
Theweddi
ngi
sal
lshehasbeent
alki
ngabout
.”
Mi
alaughed.“
Wear
eal
lexci
ted.
”
“
Iam r
eal
l
yhappyfory
ou.Iwasbegi
nni
ngt
oget
wor
ri
edkebonal
esanyal
ane.
”
“
Wedi
dn’
twantt
orusht
hings.
”
“
Igety
ou.Any
way
sgoodl
uck,
Iwon’
tbeabl
eto
at
tend.Iam wi
thmyman.
”
“
It
’sok.
”
“
Ok,
shar
p.”
“
Byel
ove.
”
Shehungupt
henMi
acal
l
edOr
a.
“
Heybabe.
.”
“
Hey
,st
il
lwi
tht
heguy
s?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Ok,
hav
eyouspokent
oNat
asha?
”
“
Yes,
shesai
dtheywer
eont
hei
rway
.”
“Honestl
yIdon’
twantNatashatobether
eatthe
wedding.Maybeifi
twasFifi
butIdon’
twantthat
toxi
cwomanany wherenearmywedding.Orata
dramaandIdon’twanttomopthefloorwi
thher
tomorrowofall
days.”
“It
oldhershewon’
tbeat
tendi
ng.Shewi
l
ljustdr
op
offJuni
orthenl
eav
e.”
“
Ihopet
hat
’sal
lshedoes.Thatwomandoesn’
tget
t
ir
edkana.
”
“
Don’
twor
ry.Whatar
eyoudoi
ng?
”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Iam l
yi
ngi
nbed.
”
“
Whatar
eyouput
ti
ngon?
”
“
Myshor
tsandt
op.
”
“
Imi
ssy
ou.CanIcomet
her
e?”
“
Todowhat
?”
“
Tof
ucky
ouandl
eav
eyoudr
ippi
ngwi
thmycum.
”
Miagi
ggled.“
Youar
enotsupposedt
oseemet
il
l
t
omorrow.”
“
ThammababeIr
eal
l
ymi
ssy
ou.Justoner
ound
t
henIl
eav
e.”
“
Ok,
come.
”
“
Giv
eme15mi
nut
es.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hehungup.Miagotupandtookofft
hedressshe
wasput
ti
ngonandchangedi nt
osomehotpants
wi
thnopanti
es.Shetookaseethr
ought
opt hat
showedof fherbr
eastandshowedthesmall
pregnancybumpt hatshewashi
ding.Sheputona
sl
eepinggownont opasKefi
l
wewal kedi
nholdi
ng
Mia’ssleepi
ngdaughter.
“
Shei
ssl
eepi
ng.It
houghty
oumi
ghtwanther
.”
“Iam goi
ngt
othet
uckshopsoy
oucankeephert
il
lI
comeback.”
“
Arey
ouexpect
ingagai
n?”
“
Ma?
”
“
Arey
oupr
egnant
?”
“
No.
”
“Youare.”Kefil
wewal kedout .Mi
alookedathersel
f
onthemi rrorwonder i
nghowKef i
lweknewt henshe
shookherhead.Mi nuteslat
ershewalkedoutinher
pushinst henwalkedt othegatewalki
ngpasther
thi
rstycousins.Oraflashedthecarli
ghtsonce.Mia
walkedov erandgoti n.
Or
asmi
l
ed.“
Hey
…”
Miat
ookof
fherpant
sthenst
raddl
edhi
m ki
ssi
ng
hi
m.
“
Hi…”
Oraadjust
edhi sseatandwiththecarparkedunder
thebigMorulatree,noonecouldseeanything.She
tookouthi
sdi ckfrom hi
spantsthenhelditupri
ght
sit
ti
ngonit.Shesatpr oper
lyandstar
tedridinghi
m.

*
**

Pusowal kedi
nsi
dehishouseacoupleofhour slat
er
thenwentt ot
hebedroom wherehi
swifewasasl eep.
Heundressedthentookashower.Hebr ushedhis
teet
hgettingr
idofthesmellofal
coholshehated
thenjoi
nedherinbedholdi
ngherfrom behind.
Tshenol
owokeupathi
scol
dhands.“
Yourhands
arecol
d.”
Her
ubbedthem al
lov
erherbodymaki
ngherl
augh.
“
Somatur
eofy ou.
”
Pusol
aughedki
ssi
ngherneck.“
Hey
…”
Tshenol
otur
nedandl
ookedathi
m.“
Whatwer
eyou
doi
ng?”
“Not
hingmuch.Justdr
inki
ngandt
alki
ng.Youknow
howtheguysare.
”
“
Youdi
dn’
tdoany
thi
ngy
oushoul
dn’
tdo?
”
Pusosmi l
ed.“RonaleftassoonasOraarri
ved,he
hadtopi ckupKenny .Henev ercameback.Fr
om
ther
eAt sil
ealsoleftbecauseApril
hadarri
vedfrom
theair
por t
.”
“WhydidApr
ilcomewhensheknowssheandMi
a
don’
treal
l
ycli
ck.”
“Shecamef orhermanobv iousl
y.If
eell
iketheydid
somet hi
ngtothei
rwives,babehaveyour eal
ized
thatEsi,
KennyandApr i
lcan’tst
ayawayf rom thei
r
men?Theyar ealwaysthere.Iwantt
oknowwhat
theyfedthei
rwivessoIcanf eedyoutoo.”
Tshenol
olaughed.“
Therr
awenafeedmei
j
a.Feed
mesoIcanbel ikeot
herwomen.
”
“
Iam goi
ngt
oaskt
hem.
”
Hekissedhersl
eepythenheputhisar
msaround
herf
alli
ngasl
eep.Tshenol
olookedathi
mthen
sl
owlygotoutofbedandtookherphonetot
he
bat
hroom.Shecal
l
edanunsav
ednumber
.
“
Hey
…”
Shesmil
ed.“
Hey…Iam happyy
oumi
ghtgetout
.I
sawyourmessage.
”
“
Met oo.ButIam abi
tner
vousofwhatmaybe
wai
ti
ngf ormeoutsi
de.
”
“Inev
erusedthatmoneysoit
’sal
lther
eforyou.You
havethemoneysoyouhavewheret ost
artf
rom.
Thekidswil
lbesohappytoseeyou.”
“
Yeah…Howi
syourhusband?
”
“
Fine,
wear
efi
ne.
”
“
Iam notgoi
ngt
obot
hery
ou.
”
Tear
sfi
l
ledTshenol
o’sey
es.“
Iknow.
”
“
ThoughImi
ssy
ou.
”
At
earr
oll
eddownhercheek.“
Iknow.
”
“Iam sosor r
y.IwishIwasabetterhusbandt
oyou.
Abet terf
athertoourki
ds.Ishoul
dhav emade
diff
erentdecisi
ons.”
Tshenol
opr
essedherl
i
pst
oget
hert
ryi
ngnott
ocr
y.
“
Ishoul
dhav
ebeenabet
terman.
”
“
Youshoul
dhav
e.Youshoul
dhav
ebeenabet
ter
man.
”
“
Ilov
eyou.Il
ovey
ousomuch.Iwi
l
lal
way
slov
e
y
ou.”
“
Wewi
l
ltal
kwheny
ougetout
.”
Kgosi
sighed.“
Yeah.
”
“
Ok…by
e.”
“
Bye.
”
Therewassil
enceast
heybothheldt
heirphonesto
thei
rear
s.Tshenol
ocl
osedhereyescry
ingsil
entl
y.
“I
thurt
s.IthurtsbecauseIloveyou.Il
ovePusobutI
l
ov ey
oust i
ll
.Ican’tunderst
andwhyIstil
ll
ovey ou
evenaft
erallthesey ear
s.Ifeel
li
keIam hol
dingon
toyouyetIam anot herman’swife.
”
“
Doy
out
hinkwest
il
lst
andachance?
”
“Il
ovey
oubutt
hatshipsank.Iwi
ll
alwaysloveyou
butIwi
ll
nev
erbewithyouthatway.Iwi
l
l j
ustlove
y
ouf
rom af
ar.Myf
utur
eiswi
thPuso.
”
“
Iam happyy
ouf
oundhappi
nessatt
heendofi
t.
”
Tshenol
onodded.“
Ihopey
ouf
indi
ttoo.
”
“
Yeah.
”
“
Bye.
”
Shehungupthenwashedherfacei
nthesi
nkbef
ore
walki
ngoutandj
oini
ngherhusbandi
nbed.

*
**

InLefa’
scar,l
ateronthatni
ght,
musicpl
ayedwhi
le
Lefadrove.HelookedatSadiwhowassleepi
ngt
hen
theguys.OnlyQwasawake.Lef aadj
ust
edthe
mirr
or.
“
Q,cany
oudr
ive?
”
“
Yah.
.”
“
Ahhl
et’
sexchange.Iam t
ir
ed.Iam get
ti
ngsl
eepy
.”
“
Ok.
”
Lefastoppedt hecarbythesi deofther oadthen
steppedout .Theyexchangedseat s,Ql ookedatSadi
sleepi
ngt henrejoi
nedtheroaddr ivi
ngof fwhil
eLef a
yawnedatt hebackseat.Heputhi scapov erhisface
asQdr oveput ti
ngonisseatbelt.Hel ookedatt he
ti
mechangi ngthemusicwhi chwasal sogetti
nghim
sleepythenher oll
eddownt hef r
ontwi ndows.
Col
dbreezehi
tSadi
’
sski
nwakingherup.She
l
ookedatQwhowasdriv
ingt
henhesmi l
edather
.
“Wakeup.
.”
Shesatproperl
ywatchinghim ashedrov
ethenshe
smil
edtakingadeepbr eat
h.Shetookherphoneand
l
ookedatthet i
methenshet ookavideoofQdri
ving
andposteditonherfacebook.
Q’
sphoner
ang,
Sadi
tooki
tandanswer
ed.
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Daught
eri
n-l
aw…”
Shebl
ushed.“
Howar
eyou?
”
“
Iam f
ine.
”
“
Wher
ear
eyouguy
snow?
”
“
KegoneretsenamoRakops.(
Wear
ejustar
ri
vi
ng
i
nRakops.
)”
“
Ok.Pl
easet
ell
mewheny
ouar
ri
vei
nMaun.
”
“
Eemma.
”
Sadi
putt
hephonedown.
“
Shesaysweshoul
dtel
lherwhenwear
ri
vei
n
Maun.
”
“
Ok.
”

*
**

Acouplemor ehourslat
er,
Qpar kedthecarinfr
ont
ofalodgehehadbookedi ntothensteppedoutto
takethebagsattheback.LefalookedatSadiasshe
tookofft
heseatbelt
.
“
Howl
onghav
eyoubeenwi
thhi
m?”
Shel
ookedathi
m.“
4year
s.”
“
Howol
dar
eyou?
”
“
19.
”
“
Soy
oust
art
eddat
inghi
m backi
nhi
ghschool
?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Cut
e.Hei
sonl
yboy
fri
endy
ouhav
eev
erhad?
”
“
Yes.
”
Lefatookouthi
sbusi
nesscar
dandhandedi
ttoher
.
“Cal
lmesomet i
mewheny ouaref
ree.
”
Sadilookedatthecardthensteppedoutofthecar.
Lefagotbehindthewheel st
aringatSadi
whowas
l
ookingbackathi scardumbf oldedt
henhet ookof
f.
Qwal kedinsi
dethelodge,shet hr
ewthebusi
ness
car
dawayf ol
lowi
ngaf t
erhim.

*
**

Aroundsi
xthatmor ni
ng,Nat
ashawaitedoutsi
de
holdi
ngherhandbag.Miawalkedoutsecondslat
er
putti
ngonawhitegown,herhairandmake-up
al
readydone.
“Uhu,Ithoughtyouwerebri
ngi
ngJuni or
.Natasha
wee,Idon’ thav
etimefordr
ama.TodayIdon’ tev
en
havetimef oryouandyourbi
tt
erness.Gakenanako
l
ewena.( Idon’
thavet
imeforyou.)
”
“
Youreal
l
ythi
nky
ouar
eal
lthatbecausey
ouar
e
mar
ryi
ng-
“
“Hey,
Iam ti
redoft
hatnonsense!Golookfor
somethingt
odo.Kantekeng?IsOratheonlyman
onearth?Fi
veyear
slat
erandy ouar
est i
l
labit
ter
babymama.Shameony ou.
”
Natashaangri
lyt
ookoutthepesti
cidechemi cal
she
hadpour edi
ntoahair
spr
aybottl
eandspr ayediton
Mia’sface.Mi
ascreamedattheburningsensati
on
asNatashahurri
edtohercaranddrov eof
f.
.
.
Dol
eav
eal
i
keandacomment
Di
rt
yConf
essi
ons
#148

Kef
il
werushedoutandl
ookedatMi
awhowas
scr
eami
ng.
“
Whathappened?
”
“
Shespr
ayedmyey
es.I
t’
sbur
ning.Nat
asha!
”
Kefi
lwepul
l
edherbackinsi
dethehouset
henwent
wit
hhertothebat
hroom wher
eshetooktheshower
headandopenthewater
.
“
Open!Open!
”
Shespray edt
herunni
ngwat erdi
recti
nginhereyes,
somespl ashi
ngonher.Secondslatershestopped
thenpul
lederdaughterupasaf ewwat chedfrom
thedoor.
Kef
igr
abbedhercarkey
sthenhur
ri
edoutwi
thher
.
“
Doy
ouhav
eaphone?
”
“
Ng.
.”
Kef
il
wetookitt
henrev
ersedandspedof
ftappi
ng
onKenny
’snumber.
“
Mony
adi
!(Br
ide!
)”
“Kenei
l
we, t
herehasbeenanaccident.Weare
headedtothehospi
talwit
hMia.Pleasegohome
andmakesur eever
ythi
ngremainsinorder
.We
mightbehereforawhil
ebutIdidwashherey es
withwater
.”
“
Eemma.Whathappened?
”
“
Someonespr
ayedsomet
hingi
nherey
es.Shesay
s
Nat
asha.
”
“Thebabymama?Thatwomanr
eal
l
ynev
erst
ops!
Sheisgoingt
ojai
l
.”
“
Sheis.Butpl
easegohome.Idon’
ttr
ustanyof
t
hosepeoplet
here.
”
“
Ok.Pl
easekeepupdat
ingme.
”
“
Ok.
”
Shehungupheadedt
othehospi
tal
.
*
***

Kennyputonherdr
essthenwalkedov
ert
othebed
whereRonawassti
llsl
eepi
ng.
“
Babe,
zipmydr
ess.
”
Ronay
awnedwaki
ngupt
henzi
ppedherdr
ess.
“
Wear
egoi
ngsoear
ly?
”
“No,Iam.Pleasemakesuret
heki
dsaregood.Don’t
belate.Miagotspray
edwi
thsomethi
nginhereyes,
thebitt
erbabymama.Iam goi
ngt
oKef i
l
we’shouse
tomakesur eevery
thi
ngr
emainsi
norder.
”
“
Ok.
”
Kennyputonhershoesthengrabbedhert
hingsand
walkedout
.ShelookedatNatewhowasal so
walki
ngoutfr
om thehotelsay
ingsomethi
ngonhis
phone.Hetur
nedtoherthenhesmi l
edwalki
ngover
.
“
Kenny
…”
“
Hi.
”
Hel
ookedathert
hensmi
l
ed.“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
“
Thanks.
”
“
Wher
eisy
ourhusband?
”
“
Uhhar
ound.
”
“
Tel
lhi
m Isayhi
.”
“
Ok.
”
“
Doy
ouknowwhoy
ouar
emar
ri
edt
o?”
“
What
?”
“
Doy
ouknowwhoy
ouar
emar
ri
edt
o?”
“
Yes.
”
“
Idoubt.I
fyoureal
l
yknewy
ouwoul
dn’
tbewear
ing
t
hatri
ng.Trustme.
”
“
Whatar
eyout
alki
ngabout
?”
“Wear etalki
ngaboutt hefactt haty oudon’tknow
themany ouaremar ri
edto.It’sf unnyhowy oucan
bemar ri
edt osomeonef ory ear s,howy oucanbe
wi t
hhimf oryear
s,sleepbesi dehi m everynight
,
shareameal wit
hhim andst illnotknowwhohe
trul
yis.
”Nat eshrugged.“Funny !”
Hetur
nedandwal
kedt
ohi
scart
henj
umpedi
nand
dr
oveoff
.
Kennywat
chedashiscardr
oveofft
henshookhis
headbr
ushi
ngthewholeweir
dconver
sati
onoff
.She
goti
nhercaranddr
ovetoKefi
lwe’
shouse.

(
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right@2021byFezMat
siki
ti
.+26775447725
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ightsreser ved:Nopar tofthisbookshallbe
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oduced, di
stribut
ed,orusedi nanyform orby
anymeans, electroni
c,photocopy i
ng,mechanical
l
y
orotherwise, withoutthepriorwrit
tenpermissi
onof
theauthor.Anyper sonwhodoesunaut hori
zed
worksinr elati
ont othispublicat
ionwil
lbeli
ableto
cri
minal prosecut i
on.)
)

*
**

Oraopenedthedoorathi
spar
ent’
shomeand
l
ookedathissonwhoi mmedi
atel
ysmi
led.
“
Hey
!”
Hel
ethi
mint
henhel
ookedar
oundbef
oregoi
ng
i
nsi
de.
“
Wher
eisy
ourmom?
”
“
Shej
ustdr
oppedmeof
fandl
eft
.”
Oraf
rownedtakinghisphone, hecal
l
edherbuther
numberdi
dn’tgothrough.Hewoul dtakei
tifi
t
meantnodramaf r
om Nat asha.
“
Okcool
.Il
i
key
ourhai
rcut
.”
Hehelpedhi
ssondr
ess.Hisphonerangf
rom t
he
bed.Hesmil
edst
ari
ngatthecall
er.
“
Babe…”
“
Hi,
it’
sMi
a’
smot
her
.”
“
Oh.
.howar
eyou?
”
“Iam notf i
ne.Miaaskedmet otel
l y
out hatNatasha
sprayedsomet hi
nginherey es.Wear eatt he
hospitalri
ghtnowbeingatt
endedbyadoct or
.He
sayswedi dwell
bywashingi tveryfastwi t
hwat er
butshei sgoingtohaveeyei r
rit
ationforanhouror
two.Theski nwherethesprayt ouchedhasal so
tunedr eddi
shthoughhesay sitwilldisappear.
.”
“
What
?”
“
Youcanspeakt
oher
.”
“
Hel
l
o?”
“
Iwantherar
rest
ed.
”
“
Ok.Howbadi
sit
?”
Shesnif
fedthenspoketearf
ull
y.“
Idon’tknow.My
eyesburnalit
tl
eandtheyhaveturnedreddishand
al
somyski n.Hopef
ull
yitcanbecov er
edinmake-
up.”
“
Iam sor
ry.Iam sososor
ry.
”
“
Aler
tthepol
i
ce.Shei
srunni
ngaway
.”
“
Ok.Il
ovey
ou.
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Mi
ahungupj
ustashi
sfat
herwal
kedi
n.
“
Whydoy
oul
ookl
i
key
ouj
ustsawaghost
?”
Oralookedathi
sboyt
henwal
kedoutwi
thhi
sfat
her
.
“Fi
nishupmyboy !
”
“
Whati
sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Nat
ashaspr
ayedsomet
hingi
nMi
a’
sey
est
his
mor
ning.
”
“Ial
way sknewIdi
dn’tl
i
ket hatgi
rl
.Whatdidyou
evenseeinherbecauseit
’snotlui
kesheisthemost
beauti
fulwomanonearth.
”
“
Idon’
tchoosewhoIl
ove.Ij
ustf
ell
forher
.”
“
Andt
odayl
ookatwhaty
ouf
ell
fordi
d.”
“
Iwantt
orepor
ther
.”
“
Good.Ihopeshei
slockedupf
orav
eryl
ongt
ime.
”

*
**

Atsi
lest
oodbehi ndAprilzi
ppi
ngherblackdress
thenhekissedherneck.April
pickedherl
ip-
gloss
andappli
edi tonherl
ips.Shepickedahatandputit
on.
“
HowdoIl
ook?
”
Atsi
lel
ookedatt
hev entthatst
art
edjustathermi
d
thi
ghgoingdownexposingherwholeleg.
“
Beaut
if
ul.Butbabear
eyousur
ethi
sdr
ess-
“
Apr
ilt
urnedandki
ssedhi
m.
“
Yes.Iam surethi
sisthedressIwantt
owear
.”She
f
ixedhi
sti
et henkissedhi
m.
“
Arey
our
eady
?”
At
sil
enoddedf
ixi
nghi
swat
ch.“
Yeah.
”
“
Didy
oucal
lthenannyt
ocheckont
heki
ds?
”
“
Yes.Theyar
egood.
”
Shepi
ckedherfr
agranceandspray
edabi tt
hen
pi
ckedherpur
se,hereyesonthemirr
or.
“
Itmustf
eel
nicebei
ngabr
idegr
oom.
”
At
sil
echuckl
ed.“
It
’sal
way
sapl
easur
e.”
Shewalkedt
othedoort
henl
ookedov
erher
shoul
der.
“Iam sure.ButIbetatt
endi
ngyoursi
ster
-l
aw’
s
weddingi smorenicer
,especi
all
ywhenyouknowher
i
nway sherhusbandtobeknowsher.Let’
sgo.I
don’
twantt obel at
e.”
Shewal kedout.At
sil
eswall
owedstari
ngatherthen
grabbedhiscarkeysandfol
lowedaft
erher.He
unlockedthecarandopenedthedoorforher
.She
ki
ssedhi scheek.
“
Thanksbabe.
”
Heclosedt
hedoorthenwal
kedr
oundt
hecarand
goti
n.Helookedather
.
“
Babe-
“
Apr
ilsmi
l
ed.“
Babe,
wear
egoi
ngt
obel
ate.Let
’s
go!
”
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
Apri
ll
eanedoverandkissedhim.“Il
oveyoumor
e.
TakeustotheweddingMr .Motsamai.
”
Hest
art
edt
hecaranddr
oveof
f.

*
**

Atthecommi
ssi
oner
’soffi
ce,Orasatnervousl
ywi
th
hi
sf ami
ly
,Mi
awassti
llnotther
e.Heturnedand
l
ookedatKennywhogav ehim asmileanda
thumbsup.Hesmi ledwi
thasighandwai t
edasthe
commi ssi
onerspoke.Mi
nuteswentby ,
Kefi
lwe
fi
nall
ywalkedinholdi
ngMia’shand.Kennysmil
ed
star
ingatMiawhowasi nhersleevel
essmermaid
gown.Mi asatbesi
deOrawhot ookherhandint
ohis
andkissedhercheek.
“
Hey
…”
MiasmiledsqueezingherhandasKennytooka
pi
ctureofbothofthem astheysmi
ledatone
another
.

*
**

Atthegarden,Qmov edar
oundwithgardenworkers
fi
xi
ngacoupl eofthingsasmoreguestsarri
ved.The
outdoorweddingrecepti
ongavetheweddinga
wholenewsensat i
on.Eachbigroundtabl
ehadt en
chair
sonitandeachguestsatinf r
ontofthei
rname
whichwaspr i
ntedonanapkin.
Oneoftheworker
swal kedovert
ohim.“Mr.
Motsamai,
therei
sasmal li
ssue.Ther
earesome
guest
swhoar ear
riv
ingbuttheyarenotont
heguest
l
ist
.”
“
Wher
ear
ethey
?”
“
Ther
e.”
“
Letmesor
titout
.”
Qwalkedovert
hensmi
l
edatt
het
wol
adi
esandt
he
f
ourkids.
“
Hi…”
“
Mynamei sPeggy
.Miai
smysister.Youcan’
ttel
l
meaboutaguestl
i
stwhenIam hersist
er!
”
“OkPeggy,j
ustcalm down.Wedon’twantdrama
today
,ify
oucontinuemakingnoiseIam goi
ngto
haveyouthr
ownoutofher e,am Icl
ear
?”
Peggyl
ookedathi
m andnodded.“
“
Good,Iam sureMiadi
dn’tforgety
ouandifshedi
d,
i
tmusthavebeenami stake.Goandsetonthat
t
abl
ewi t
hallyourki
ds.
”
Peggywal
kedt
ot hetabl
ewi
thherki
dst
henQ
l
ookedatt
heotherlady.
“
Arey
ouwi
thher
?”
“
No.Shef
orcedmet
ocomeanddr
opherof
f.
”
“
Youar
esi
ster
s?”
“
YesbutIknowwewer
enoti
nvi
ted.Iam goi
ngt
o
l
eav
e.”
Qstar
edatherpr
ett
yfacet
hensmi
l
ed.“
What
’sy
our
name?”
“
Ror
isang.
”
Hi
sey
eswentt
oherhi
ps.
“Iam sur
eMiamusthaveforgott
enthoughIknow
shewouldn’
twantustosendy oubot
haway .You
cangoandseatwithher
.”
“
No.Butt
hanky
ou.
”
Sadiappr
oachedthem i
nasleev
elessbondage
dressandalongcurl
yweav
e.
“
Babe…”
Qtur
nedt
ohert
hensmi
l
edasRor
isangwal
ked
away
.
“
Yeah?
”
“
Weshoul
dsomepi
ctur
esf
ort
hegr
am.
”
Qsmi l
ed,heknewherandtherewasnowayshe
wouldhidethej
eal
ousaway.Hesmi l
edather
camerathenshetookacoupleofpi
ctur
esand
ki
ssedhim.
“
Ok.Ar
etheyal
mosther
e?”
Helookedathi
swatchandbef
orehecoul
dsay
any
thingcar
shadbegundri
vi
ngin.
“
Theyar
eher
e.”
EsiandMaatlawalkedov er
,hesmi
l
edasthey
approachedhi
m.Hef istbumpedwi
thhi
sunclet
hen
huggedhisaunt.
“
Aunt
y…”
“
Myboy
.”
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
Esi
smi
l
edi
nhersi
l
kdr
ess.“
Thanky
oumyboy
.
Let
habosai
dgi
vehi
m acal
l
.”
“
Ok.
”
“
Wher
edoweseat
?Any
wher
e?”
“
Nah…t
heusherwi
l
lshowy
ou.
”
“
Ok.
”
Hewalkedt
othefrontandt
ookamicwhileEsiand
Maat
lasatonatablewit
hBofel
oandherhusband
t
oget
herwithTshenol
oandPuso.
“Ladi
esandgentl
emen,ourpeopl
ear
eher
e.Iam
goingtoneedy
out oset
tl
edown!”
Sadi l
ookedathi m withasmi le.Shecoul djustli
ck
thegr oundhi smot herwal kedon, thiswomanhad
givenbi r
thtoahandsomemanandshecoul dn’
t
believeheact uall
yher s.Hel ockedey eswithher
thenwi nkedathergi v
ingherasmi le.Sadiblushed.
Qcont i
nuedt alki
ngwi ththatdeepf irmvoiceofhis,
hewassot allandbuf f
edhel ookedol derthanhis
ownage, thatbearddi dn’
thel pmat t er
sort hatsui
t
hewasput t
ingon.I tl
ookedasi fitwast ail
ormade
j
ustf orhim.
*
**

Kennyf
ixedMi
a’
sgownast
heyst
eppedoutoft
he
car
.
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”
“Thanks.Ican’
tbel
i
evet
hatwi
tcht
ri
edt
orui
nthi
s
dayforme. ”
“Don’
tthi
nkabouther
.Enj
oyt
hisdayt
othef
ull
est
andshamethedevil
.”
Mi
asmi l
ed.“
Thanky
ou.Iam sol
uckyt
ohav
eyouas
mysi
ster.
”
Kennyhuggedher
.“Iam t
hel
uckyonet
ohav
eyou.
”
“
Ilov
eyou.
”
Tear
sfi
l
ledKenny
’seyes.“
Ilov
eyout
oo.Il
ovey
ou
muchmoremylove.
”
Kennyletgothentheybot
hblinkedawaytheirt
ear
s
l
aughing.Theyal
lstoodnextt
ot hei
rpart
ners.A
songstart
edplayi
ngtheystar
teddancingthei
rway
t
owhereever
yone,
theguestcheer
edwhi
l
eot
her
s
t
ookv
ideos.

*
**

Fi
fiputherhandonhermout
hst
ari
ngatNat
asha.
“
Youdi
dwhat
?”
“
Shei
sful
lofher
sel
f.
”
“Sheisnot!Youdon’
twanttoacceptt
hathehas
mov edon.HelovesMia,
acceptit
!Ther
earealotof
guysinthi
swor l
d.Or
aisnottheonlyman.
”
“
Iam notl
i
key
ou!Someofus-
“
“St
opi twit
ht heexcuses.Or aisnevergoi
ngt ocome
backtoy ou.Nev er!NnammaIcan’ tbefr
iendswith
youany morebecausey ouarev i
l
e.Ifyoucanpour
someonewi t
hpest ici
deont hefacewhatcany oudo
tome?Inowhav eaboy fri
endandIcan’tkeepy ouin
myl i
febecausenomat t
erwhat ,
youdon’twantt o
change.Fivey earslat
eryouarest i
l
l t
hesame
personyouwer etenyearsback.Youar egoingtojai
l
i
fyoudidn’
tknow,IhopeOragetsful
lcustodyofhis
sonwhil
ey ouar
einjai
l.Hopef
ull
ywheny oufinal
ly
getoutyouwoul
dhav elear
ntyourl
esson.Bye.”
Fi
fiwalkedtoherboy
friend’scar
,shegotinand
droveoffl
eavi
ngNatashast andi
ngthere.Shetook
outherphonethencl
ickedonMi a’sprofi
l
e.Shehad
changedherprofi
l
epicture.Shewentdownt othe
postshehadmademi nutesbackwithapictur
eof
Orakissi
ngher.
‘
Myhusband.Fi
nal
l
yIam hi swife.Wewil
lst
il
lpush,
doesn’
tmat
teri
fbi
tterpeopleoutther
etr
ytostop
us,i
fit
smeantt
obe, i
twill
be.Cheerstous!
’
Warmtear
srol
leddownNatasha’
scheeksasher
hear
tbr
oke.Hewastrul
ygone.

*
**

Lefawalkedinsi
dehi
sparent
’shousethenbumped
fi
stwithhissibl
i
ngssmi
li
ng.Mothusismil
edwalki
ng
fr
om thebedroom.
“
Wher
edi
dyousl
eep?
”
“
Atahot
el.Iwast
oot
ir
edt
odr
ive.
”
Nanaowal
kedov
erandsmi
l
ed.“
Hey
…fi
nal
l
ymade
i
t!
”
Lef
asmil
edt
henhandedheragi
ftback.“
From
mom.”
Nanaotooki
twit
hasmi
l
e.“
Thanky
ouf
orbei
nga
cour
iermyboy.
”
Lefasmi l
edfollowinghertothekit
chenwhi l
e
Mot husisatdown.Her eachedforhisphone.He
repl
iedtoacoupl eofmessagesbef or
egoi ngonhi s
facebook.Hesmi l
edseeingKenny’spictures,i
t
seemedhery oungersist
erhadgot t
enmar ri
ed.He
l
ikedt hepict
uresthencontinuedscrol
lingbr i
efl
y.He
puthisphonedownasNanaowal kedi namndsat
besideshim whi l
eLefaheldaplateofbr eakfast
.
“
Howi
sitgoi
ngatt
heGabor
onebr
unch?
”
Nanaosi
ghedast
heyst
art
eddi
scussi
ngbusi
ness.
“
Bat
hong!Babe,hej
ustar
ri
ved.Canyoudi
scussthat
t
omorr
owandl etev
ery
onejustenj
oythef
eel
ingof
hav
ingLef
aar
oundi
j
a.”
Mot
husi
smi
l
edki
ssi
nghercheek.“
Sor
ry.
”
“
Thanky
ou.
”

*
**

Laterthatdayaf t
ertheweddi ngcel
ebrat
ion,Kenny
satwithot herauntsast heyadvi
sedMiawhi l
ethey
wereal l
dressedi nthei
rGer manpri
ntdresseswith
tsal
e’saroundhershoul dersanddoeksintheir
heads.Mi a’sheartpoundedsomuch, shewasabout
tobeleftwi thhernewf amily.
Ofcausesheknewt hem butt
hiswasnowgoi ngto
beanof fi
cialst
ep,shewasnowof fici
all
ytheir
daughterin-l
aw.Shekeptherheaddownhol di
ng
Kenny’
shand.Kenny ’sphonevibr
atedfrom her
dress’
spocket ,
shetookitoutandopenedt he
message.
Husbae:
Tlaot
seki
ssy
agago.(
Comeandgety
our
ki
ss.
)
Shesmi l
edblushingstari
ngatt hetextthenputher
phonebackinherpocket .Shel ookedattheaunts
thenslowl
ystoodupandwal kedout,keepi
ngher
headdown.Shel ookedar oundast hesunsetbefore
quickl
ywalki
ngt ot hecar
.Shegoti nthenRona
l
ookedathersmi ling.
“
Hey
…”
Shesmi
l
ed.“
Hi…y
ouar
edi
stur
bingkana.
”
RonaleanedoverandFrenchki
ssedher
.Kenny
ki
ssedhim back.Ronapausedt
henmov edback.
“
Goback.That
’sal
l
.”
Kennyl
ookedathi
mthenl
aughedopeni
ngt
hedoor
.
“
Kenny
…”
Shetur
nedt
ohi
m.Hel
eanedbackonhi
sseatwi
tha
smil
e.
“
Ronawagor
ata.(
Ronal
ovesy
ou.
)”
Shebl
ushed.“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”
Shewalkedawaygiggl
ingashesmi l
edwatchi
ngher
ti
l
lhecouldn’
tseeheranymore,
disappear
ingi
nthe
crowd.Het ookhi sphonethenl
ookedatacoupleof
picturesinhisphone.Hechoseoneandputi tonhis
what sapppr ofi
lepict
ureandfacebook.I
twasa
pictureofKennyt heti
meshewasst i
l
ldoi
ngherfi
rst
yearatuni versi
ty.Hecaptioneditwit
h‘Andyear
s
l
at er,sheisstil
ltheone.Sematla’
nyanasame.Il
ove
youMmaMot samai .
’
Hisphonev
ibr
atedmi
nut
esl
atert
henheopened
Kenny’
smessage.
“
MmaMot samailov
esy outoo.Shel
ovesy
oumuch
more.Shewil
lshowy oujusthowmuchshelov
es
youlat
eron.
”
Ronasmiledal
onest ar
ingatt
hetext,
fuck!Wasthis
howbeingcontentandhappyfel
tli
ke?Hepinched
himsel
fmakingsureitwasreal
.Helaughedalone
thenst
eppedoutofthecartojoi
ntheothermar r
ied
men.

THEEND….
.
.
It
’sbeenjour neyandi thasfi
nall
ycomet oanend
.Iwouldliket othanky oual
lforbeingthegr eatest
support
ersawr i
tercanaskf or.Icannev erthank
youenoughf orallthel oveandsuppor ty
ougi veme.
Iwouldalsol iketot hankourbreadwinner s,our
oxygenprovider s…y oukeptuswel lfedthr oughout
thebook.Ilov ey ouall,hangoutaroundsoy oucan
j
umpi nthenex ttrainwi t
hus.Yours,Fez.