Father to Son

Index

Acknowledgement:
I wish to express my deep gratitude and my heartfelt thanks to my English
teacher Ms.Premalatha for her excellent guidance, support and
encouragement without which the successful completion of this project
wouldn’t have been possible. It also gives me great pleasure in expressing
my gratitude for the facilities that were provided by the school. I also
thank my parents for their constant support and their painstaking efforts
and my fellow mates for their useful opinion and inputs
Certificate:
This is to certify that Tharun.A of Class XI ‘B’ of SSVM School of Excellence,
Coimbatore has successfully completed this project report in English on
the topic: “Father to Son”. For partial fulfilment of AISSCE as prescribed by
the CBSE in the year 2022 -23.
Objective:
➢ To know about the poetess
➢ Understand the theme of the poem
➢To identify the poetic devices
➢ To appreciate the poetic beauty
➢ To understand the universal problem of generation gap
➢ To understand the present relationship between father and son
➢ To understand fathers agony
Introduction:
The poem ‘Father to Son’ is written by Elizabeth Jennings.The poem brings
out the agony of a father who has lost all kinship with his son. The son is
now grown-up. He lives in his own world. He has no feeling of any
relationship with his father. The father bitterly feels the pangs of this
emotional separation. He wants the same kind of bond with his son as he
had when the son was a little child. Instead of coming together they are
drifting apart. There is a gap of understanding and communication.
Such a situation is a common feature in most of the families. The new
generation wants to live life on its own terms. The youngsters think
independently. They cease to be on talking terms. Father feels helpless.
He is ready to forgive the child provided the latter fees sorry. But he rarely
tries to understand the young boy’s likes and dislikes, demands and
dreams. The conflict is never resolved because they refuse to
compromise.
Action Plan:
 Selection of the topic
 Approval of the topic by the Teacher
 Preparation of Base Data through secondary data’s
 Data collection and its analysis.
 Preparation of a detailed report
About the poet :
Elizabeth Joan Jennings, (born July 18, 1926—died October 26, 2001),
English poet whose works relate intensely personal matters in a
plainspoken, traditional, and objective style. Jennings was educated
at Oxford High School and St. Anne’s College, Oxford. Jennings worked in
advertising, at the City Library, and in the publishing industry. Her first
pamphlet, Poems, appeared in 1953, followed by A Way of Looking (1955),
which won her a Somerset Maugham Award and enabled her to visit
Italy. Song for a Birth or a Death marked a new development, with its
confessional tone and more savage view of love. Some of the best of her
later poems concern her nervous breakdown and its aftermath, such as
those collected in Recoveries and The Mind Has Mountains. Other works
include The Animals’ Arrival, Lucidities, Relationships, Extending the
Territory, and Familiar Spirits. She also published poetry for children.
Elizabeth Jennings was notably influenced by writers such as W.H.
Auden, Robert Graves, Edwin Muir, and Gerard Manley Hopkins. In 1992
Jennings was made a Commander of the British Empire.
Father to Son
I do not understand this child
Though we have lived together now
In the same house for years. I know
Nothing of him, so try to build
Up a relationship from how
He was when small. Yet have I killed

The seed I spent or sown it where

The land is his and none of mine?
We speak like strangers, there’s no sign
Of understanding in the air.
This child is built to my design
Yet what he loves I cannot share.

Silence surrounds us. I would have

Him prodigal, returning to
His father’s house, the home he knew,
Rather than see him make and move
His world. I would forgive him too,
Shaping from sorrow a new love.

Father and son, we both must live

On the same globe and the same land,
He speaks: I cannot understand
Myself, why anger grows from grief.
We each put out an empty hand,
Longing for something to forgive

Literary Devices
The poet, Elizabeth Jennings has used following poetic devices in the
poem:

Metaphor
‘Yet have I killed
The seed I spent or sown it where
The land is his and none of mine?’

The words ‘seed’, ‘sown’, and ‘land’ are metaphors for the father’s efforts
that he made to build loving relationship with his son, and the son’s heart
respectively.

‘I would have Him prodigal, returning to His father’s house’ the poetic
device used is metaphor.

Alliteration
In the lines ‘The seed I spent or sown it where’, and ‘Silence surrounds us’
the poetic device used is alliteration.
Simile
In expression ‘We speak like strangers’ the poetic device used is ‘simile’.
Summary
The poem is about the agony of a father where he rants about the
unsettling relationship with his son who is now a grown-up. He shares that
although they had lived together in the same house for years, he doesn’t
understand him. He doesn’t know anything about him and even if he tried
to build up a relationship with him like the one when he was a small child,
he was in vain.
He further says that even if his son looks like him, yet he doesn’t know
what he loves. He acknowledges the communication gap and lack of
understanding between them and they speak like strangers. His son is in a
different place which he cannot access due to the increasing gap. There is
silence between them. He is ready to forgive his prodigal son. He wants to
accept him back to the house, the one which he always knew. He doesn’t
want his son to move around the world. He is longing to love him.
The son finally speaks up and shares what he feels. He is at a stage where
he cannot understand himself. He feels grief about the growing distance
between them and he is angry due to the grief and sadness. They put out
an empty hand towards each other but none of them holds it. They want
to forgive each other yet couldn’t find a solution to the problem
Analysis of the poem:
The theme of the poem is the generation gap which occurs when the
communication link between two generations breaks due to a mutual lack
of understanding, tolerance and acceptance
The poem highlights the internal conflict a father undergoes when his son
becomes old enough to define his own interests, thoughts and
perceptions. The worried father complains that he cannot understand his
child despite having lived together for many years in the same house. The
father tries to continue a relationship based on what he knew of the son
from his youngest years but of course, the son has change over time. The
tone is almost pleading, attempting to find a link with his grown up son.
He questions whether he has already lost his own child, his son, due to
this distance between them or was the son on a mental plane that was
entirely his own and which, the father cannot access.
The father and son have become strangers with no understanding of each
other. Traditionally, the son’s upbringing is in the very environment and
with the values the father provided. Thus, the father feels his son is built
to his design and should be like his father in most aspects. However, his
son now has interests the father cannot share. There is no shared passion,
no common ground. The frustration of the father is evident as he struggles
to understand why his own son has turned into an absolute stranger.
The father in the poem sees his child as the prodigal (Spendthrift) son and
wants him to return to the home he has always known. He does not want
the son to make his own world, away from his father. The father says he
would forgive his son if he asked for forgiveness like the prodigal son. He
would love him again despite the sorrow of the distance that existed
between them once. The tone is slightly condescending and implies that
the father is unable to let his son go, even at the cost of restricting the
son's personal development and independence.

The son admits that he is at a point where he is struggling to understand

even himself. He does feel the grief of the broken relationship he shares
his father and yet, there is an anger that arises out of his confused, fraught
inner self. The son speaks for the first time and it is quite clear, that the
frustration lies on both sides.

The father concludes the poem realising that in their hearts, each of them
wants to forgive the other. However, neither wants to take the first step
and ask for forgiveness. Each puts out an empty hand for the other to
take, but neither places theirs in the other’s hand. However, it is positive
that at least they long to forgive and find a way to make things work.
Theme and message:

THEME
The theme of the poem Father to Son is Generation Gap and
Communication Gap. In the poem, a father and his son are living in the
same house since years. However the son who is an adult now, does not
talk to his father. In fact, the father says that they talk very like strangers.
Father is unable to understand why he behaves like this though he (father)
himself taught him the way of life.

MESSAGE :
The message of the poem Father to Son is the importance of relationship
and understanding the changing times. In this poem, a father is confused
and sad as he is not able to talk to his son though both are living in the
same house for years.

The father is probably thinking that the experiences of his son are same as
his own. However with changes time the new generation faces new types
of problems. Moreover the thinking of new generation is totally different
from that of old generation.

Throughout the poem, the father is unable to understand his son. In the
end, the son finally speaks up and tells that he is at a stage where he
cannot understand himself or eve his anger. Though father listens to him
yet he is unable to get his words and finally the gap remains intact.

So, in the poem, the poet gives the message of maintaining relationships
with great care.
Generation Gap:

Generation Gap is a term given to the gap or age difference between two
sets of people; the young people and their elders, especially between
children and their parents. Everything is influenced by the change of time-
the age, the culture, mannerism, and morality. This change affects
everyone. The generation gap is an endless social phenomenon. Every
generation lives at a certain time under certain circumstances and
conditions. So, all generations have their own set of values and views.
Every generation wants to uphold the principles they believe in. This is a
problem that has continued for ages.
We should always welcome fresh and new ideas. Accepting new changes
indicates that we are advancing and developing significantly. But, there
will be a clash between the opinions and views of both generations. The
result of this clash leads to distanced relations. If this clash gets too much,
it will be a matter of worry.
We can see the generation gap, usually between parents and kids. Parents
typically want to follow the traditions and norms and expect the same
thing from their kids. But in the modern age, kids with broad thinking
refuse to accept such traditions and customs. They want to live their life
according to their ways. They fail to understand each other, which
sometimes turns into clashes. It is considered one of the primary reasons
for conflict between parents and kids.
People belonging to the older generations believe in collectivism and thus
they prefer living in joint families. However, the younger generations are
imbued with an individualist attitude and thus they prefer living in nuclear
families. This implies that the overall lifestyle of the people has been
impacted in a drastic way. In terms of workplace attitudes, the thoughts of
the young generation and the older generation also vary. For instance,
people of the older generations are patient and maintain perseverance.
However, the younger generation of employees often get impatient at
work and thus they tend to work recklessly. In addition, the attitudes of
women have also changed. For instance, the older generations could not
accept the fact that women should earn a living and become independent.
However, the younger generations view women from a different
perspective.
Both parents and their kids fail to reach a solution that distances them
from each other and creates misunderstandings. Parents should not
impose their expectations on them to avoid such conflicts. Similarly, the
kids should also try to understand their parents’ situation and where it is
coming from.
Ways to reduce the generation gap

Nothing in the world can be as beautiful as a parent-child relationship. It

should be nurtured very delicately and so it is important to bridge the gap
between the two generations. It is time to realize that neither is completely
right nor wrong. Both generations have to develop more understanding and
acceptance for each other. Having a dialogue with each other calmly, with
the idea of sorting out conflict amicably in ideas, changing their mindset for
each other, and coming to a middle ground can be the most helpful
instrument in bridging the gap between the two generations.

Spending more time with each other like family outings, vacations, picnics,
shopping, watching movies together could be some effective ways to build
up a strong bond with each other. Both the generations need to study the
ways of the society during their growing period and have mutual respect
for it. To reduce the friction between the two generations, both parents and
children have to give space to each other and define certain boundaries
that the latter should respect.

The generation gap occurs because society is constantly changing. It is the

responsibility of both generations to fill this gap with love, affection, and
trust. Both generations should have mutual respect for the views and
opinions that they uphold and advance cautiously with the development of
society.
Conclusion

The poem Father to Son emphasizes the concept of generation gap.It is

important to understand and resolve this issue
The generation gap is a very critical concept that occurs because of the
different natures of every person. No one can end this generation gap but
obviously, you can opt for some way in which it can be reduced.

There should be efforts made by both sides to get a better relationship

between two people. The generation gap may cause conflict between
families but if you try to understand the thinking of another person and
choose a path in between then you can get a happy living family.

No one wants to live in a tense environment and you always need your
elders with yourself no matter what, they are the ones who care for you,
they may have different ways of expressing their love and care for you and
you need to understand them and their ways. Having your elders with you
in your family is a blessing, you can talk with them and let them know your
views and understand your ways to approach a particular situation.
Bibliography:
https://www.successcds.net/
https://www.netexplanations.com/
https://englishnotes.com/
http://g-corexi.blogspot.com/
https://www.scribd.com/