LIFE COACHING

C E T I F I C AT E C O U R S E

THE CORE VALUES

 THE CORE VALUES
You might be asking: why personal core values are so important? Values are a part of us:
they highlight what we stand for. They represent our unique, individual essence and act as
the primary driving force behind our actions and behaviours that provides us with a
set of ‘rules’ to live by, alongside a personal code of conduct.

Values guide our decisions. Whilst our values in life are constant, our priorities are always
changing; therefore meaning how we priori tise our values are susceptible to change. Much
like the core values of a company, our personal core values guide our behaviour and choices
in life which ultimately go on to affect other people.

The decisions we make as life coaches will have a significant impact on other people who
are entrusting us to help them. Having a firm understanding of your core values helps you
become a quicker, more focused and effective decision-maker, with the confidence and clear
direction a client needs to inspire them to manage the big and small decisions they need to
make in life. Without a solid understanding of what our core values are, we will find ourselves
feeling lost, disorganised and ungrounded in every aspect of our lives.

Value plays an important role in one’s mental well being: when we abide by our core values
we feel authentic and principled, but when we lose sight of them or act against them, we
become numb with guilt and shame and feel devoured by a sense utter meaninglessness.
Values enhance the self, and when we love, connect, grow, appreciate and protect, we
become more valuable.

Although your personal core values may not exactly match anyone else’s, understanding what
they are will still help you determine your surrounding culture and make better-informed
decisions. Some people will consciously (or unconsciously) use their personal core values to
choose friendships, relationships and also business partnerships. Our core values also help
us wisely manage our personal resources such as time and money. Simply put, core values
serve us as effective decision-making guidelines that help us to remain congruent, consistent
and balanced in the eyes of other people. No one trusts anyone who presents themselves as
being inconsistent with their pledged values.

Our values should (ideally) determine our priorities in life. Life is usually going pretty well, and
we feel content and satisfied when the decisions we make match our values and priorities.
However, when our decisions don’t align with our values, that’s when we start feeling like
something’s ‘wrong’ and this can lead to dissatisfaction, frustration and in some instances,
even bitterness or resentment. To avoid this, we must make a real effort to identify what our
values actually are.

HOW DO I IDENTIFY MY VALUES?

Our values are like a compass that points us to our ‘true north’. This workbook provides great
exercises that will help you to identify your personal values clearly.
 THE CORE VALUES
Exercise 1: Can you reflect back on a moment where you felt happy, fulfilled and proud of
yourself? Take some time to describe this moment in detail. Identify what elements of this
situation, in particular, led to these feelings of happiness and pride.

1. What were you doing?

2. Were you with other people, and if so who?

3. What other factors contributed to your happiness?

 THE CORE VALUES
In the same way that we feel happy and fulfilled when we’re living out our values, we can
also experience feelings of regret, sadness, and emptiness when we are not living out our
values.

Exercise 2: Take a few moments to remember a time when you felt incredibly regretful.
Describe the details of this situation/memory: what was it specifically that led to these
feelings of regret?
 THE CORE VALUES
Feeling frustrated or unfulfilled can often be a sign that our values might be being
quashed, perhaps by parts of ourselves, by external situations or other people.

Exercise 3: Identify a time when you felt frustrated, unfulfilled, empty or annoyed? Make
a note of the particular elements of this situation that led to these feelings of frustration,
unfulfillment and emptiness.

There are certain activities that we can find ourselves doing that engross us and cause us
to get into the flow. These are usually activities that are challenging and rewarding, and when
we’re doing them we often lose track of time.

Exercise 4: Make a list of any activities where you experience this flow? What is it specifically
about these activities that you enjoy so much?
 THE CORE VALUES
We cannot grow in life without being evoked by inspiration: creativity, self-esteem, perceived
competence and optimism are all consequences of inspiration. From a very early age we
adopt this idea of wishing to be like someone in order to become someone; whilst in our
earliest years our concept of inspiration tended to revolve around what you wanted to be in
terms of career, as we get older, we take inspiration from people who we admire the traits
of. There are certain people that we come across in life who we find inspiring and embody
qualities or live lives that we aspire to.

Exercise 5: Who are your role models and what qualities about these individuals do you
admire?

Exercise 6: Everyone has something to offer to the world. Take the time on this page to
acknowledge what you have to give to those around you, and what makes you of value. What
are my natural gifts and qualities? When do other people usually turn to you for help? What
qualities and gifts do you identify in yourself that you believe others may find of value?
 THE CORE VALUES
Exercise 7: Determine your most important values, based on your experiences of inner peace.
Consider why each experience is so memorable and important?

Use the list of common personal values on the next page to help you get started – aim for
approximately 10 top values. As you work through this exercise, you may find that some
of these values combine naturally: for example, if you value generosity, philanthropy, and
community, you could say that serving others is one of your top values.

EXAMPLES OF CORE VALUES

Accountability Purpose Efficiency

Accuracy Professionalism Empathy
Achievement Progress Enthusiasm
Adventurousness Reliability Equality
Authenticity Resourcefulness Excellence
Ambition Restraint Excitement
Assertiveness Relationships Exploration
Balance Security Expressiveness
Belonging Self Actualisation Fairness
Boldness Self-control Faith
Calmness Significance Freedom
Carefulness Selflessness Generosity
Challenge Self-Worth Goodness
Clear-mindedness Spontaneity Giving
Commitment Stability Growth
Community Sharing Hard Work
Compassion Teamwork Giving
Connection Temperance Honesty
Consistency Truth Hope
Contentment Thoroughness Humility
Self Improvement Timeliness Independence
Contribution Tolerance Ingenuity
Certainty Traditionalism Identity
Creativity Trustworthiness Increase
Decisiveness Truth-seeking Justice
Dependability Understanding Leadership
Determination Uniqueness Legacy
Devoutness Unity Love
Diligence Vision Loyalty
Discipline Vitality Obedience
Discretion Authenticity Openness
Practicality Effectiveness

Note: Although this list of potential values is thorough, it is not necessarily complete.
Please feel free to add to the list if required.
 THE CORE VALUES
Exercise 8: Now take a few moments to prioritise your ‘top’ values. This step is usually the
most challenging as you’ll have to look deep within yourself. However, it’s also the most
important step, because, when you’re faced with a decision, you may have to choose
between solutions that will satisfy different values.

This is when it’s crucial to know which value is more important to you. Without worrying
about the order, make a list of your top 10 values. Look at the first two values on the list and
ask yourself, ‘If I could only satisfy one of these, which one would I choose?’

Work your way through the list, comparing each value with each of the other values until
you’ve got your list in the correct order for you.

Exercise 9: Reaffirming your values - Take a few moments to check your top-priority values
and make sure they fit with your life and your vision for yourself.

1. Do the values you’ve chosen make you feel good about yourself

2. Are you proud of your top three values?

3. Would you be comfortable to telling people you respect of your values?

4. Do these values represent things you would support, even if your choice weren’t popular
and put you in the minority?
 THE CORE VALUES
When you take into consideration your values in decision making, you can be certain to keep
a sense of integrity and what you know is right, while being able to approach decisions with
confidence and clarity.

You’ll also know that what you’re currently doing is motivated by the progress that you want
to make in life. It’s not always easy to make value-based choices, but it will more than likely
make life much easier in the long run.

KEY POINTS

•Identifying
• and taking the time to understand your values is an important and
challenging exercise. Your personal values are central to who you are – and who you
want to become.
•By
• becoming more aware of these important factors in your life, you can use them as a
guide to make the best choice in any situation. Some of life’s decisions are really about
determining what you value most.
•When
• many options seem reasonable, it can be comforting and helpful to rely on your
core values and use them as a strong guiding force to point you in the right direction.