Book of Shadows

A Workbook for Awakening Witches

For now, this workbook will be in a PDF format to be printed and put in a 3 ring binder, folder, or just scattered
about! If there is not enough room on a page, feel free to add in pages as needed. Or, transfer the questions to
a journal and work within it. You may find yourself adding more questions as well! There is no wrong way to
keep this workbook. I do, however, recommend you work through the sections in order, as they will build
upon one another. Many questions in this notebook have been gathered from sources such as books, internet
searches, “pins” and witchy Facebook threads. They are a compilation of musings of your sisters and brothers
that have taken this path before you! I do hope that this workbook speaks to you, and that through it you
build your foundation to work with the energies of the earth and magic. Blessed Be.

Section 1 :. Honesty

Section 2 :.Relationships and Desire

Section 3:. Fear

Section 4:. Remorse and Realizations

Section 5:. Rebirth

Section 1: Honesty

Merry Meet! You and I have a long journey ahead! And it is important to me to begin this workbook with the
concept of honesty. The Webster dictionary definition of honesty is an adherence to the facts, fairness and
straight forwardness of conduct. Perhaps you are quite honest in your actions in society, or perhaps not. We
will address this in this chapter as well, however the initial questions will be regarding how honest you are
with YOURSELF. And that is why we are beginning with this. If we start elsewhere, we may end up on a path
that doesn’t really serve the purpose of shadow work.

This section will not be pretty. If you answer with personal sincerity it is quite likely that there will be
SOMETHING you write down that you will not want anyone to ever see. If you really are truly honest. The
reason for that is without dark there is not light, without negative there is not positive. Everyone has done,
said or thought things that they are not proud of. However, in order to connect fully with your intuition and
energies you must know your own truths, confront them and hold the lessons you have learned from them in
your heart. Hopefully, when you finish this workbook you will realize that the things you are not proud of are
not so terrible after all, as they have had a part in shaping you to be the person you are now. You will have
embraced any shame you feel and released the negative energy. Perhaps you will feel free enough to keep the
workbook, to have to reflect upon and center you if you go astray. Perhaps you will feel freed from it and
symbolically burn the workbook. These will be choices you make personally at the end of the time you spend
with yourself throughout this book.

Let’s begin. For this first question, I don’t want you to think to hard about it. Go with your first gut reaction to
the question. Don’t second guess yourself. This isn’t a test, its an introduction to the material… your answer
may change as you proceed through the workbook.

How honest do you feel you are with yourself?

Thank you for your gut reaction. Next, let’s explore this question in more depth by answering these next two;

How honest are you with yourself about your true feelings?

What is one feeling that you struggle with?

Being honest with yourself is probably the hardest thing we do as humans in todays society. Some people
escape themselves by getting wrapped up in social media trends, others use drugs and alcohol to escape their
own truths. You are exhibiting strength of character by continuing with shadow work. Be proud of yourself.
Now, sometimes we close ourselves off to others. The next question I have for you might be harder than you
think. Before you answer it, really stop and contemplate your actions and relationships with family, friends
and co-workers.

How honest am I to other people about my feelings?

In what environment do I find myself most comfortable sharing my feelings?

Hopefully you are still with me here. So, now that we have addressed your current mindset on how honest you
feel you are with yourself and others, lets take a deeper path into your heart. We are going to talk next about
YOU. Remember that this workbook is for you, it is not something you ever have to share or even look at again.
So be fully open to your heart as it whispers its truths. Let them flow from ink to paper. You will only connect
with yourself if you let go of stigmas and fear.

Do you trust yourself, and what shapes your answer?

Do you love yourself, and why/why not?

How worthy of other peoples love do you believe you are? What makes you feel that way?
Wow. That got real fast. Personal trust and love doesn’t come easily. In fact, often it is the most difficult to
earn as most of us are hardest on ourselves. At this point you might be wondering if you really want to move
forward with this workbook. Are you really on the right path? Are you beginning to doubt yourself or your
ability to connect with the energies you hold? It is normal to have self-doubt. My next questions for you are
designed to help you become clear in your intentions.

Why are you engaged in shadow work?

How do you think shadow work will assist you on your life path?
Feeling centered and certain? I really hope you are. Shadow work is such an important part of your path as it
helps to shape your ability to reach higher stages of consciousness and have purity in your actions and
intentions. Next we are going to delve deeper into your true self, and start navigating your headspace and
heart maze. Some of the things we are going to talk about might get a little rough, so grab your crystals,
tissues, and a cup of hot tea!

What behavior do you judge yourself the most for? Why do you feel you exhibit that behavior? Was the
behavior learned or did you shape it yourself?

What behavior, that you know is wrong or has negative effects on others do you repeat over and over again?
Why do you continue the behavior even though you know it is wrong?
What do you consider to be your negative personality traits, and when do you notice yourself displaying them?

When you are defensive, shut down or reactive towards others, what are you really feeling about yourself?
What triggers that behavior? Do you tend to feel justified in your behavior? Most often, how do you feel about
your behavior once you have detached from the situation or “cooled down”?
Well done. I’m sure those weren’t the easiest questions you ever had to face about yourself. Hopefully
addressing those behaviors with yourself and analyzing the place they have in your life will assist you with
managing them in the future. Having the strength to face negative aspects of the self and how they play out
through behaviors is the first step to change. I’m going to go a little easier on you with the next few questions,
or perhaps they may be harder depending on your self-image and degree of self-love. If they are harder, I
would invite you to expand on your answers with why it was so difficult for you to pinpoint or express your own
virtues.

What is one trait that you love about yourself? How do you think you can embrace that trait publicly and share
its benefits with those around you?

Think about things you consider to be your weaknesses. Which of your self-identified weaknesses could have
potential for greatness?
I hope that those questions made you smile. Shadow work is not easy, but along with the darkness there is
absolutely light! They say that light is found at the end of the tunnel (of darkness), and so much of that is true!
The next few questions will be relatively easy, but I feel they are important for framing your introspection in
this chapter. Try to think beyond your current situation to be more broad in your answer. The answer to these
questions should be an overall answer to your feelings during the span of your years of life.

Overall, what causes you the greatest amount of happiness in life and why?

Overall, what causes you the greatest amount of sadness in life and why?

Overall, what causes you the greatest amount of anger in life and why?
What would you say is the most important time that you have had to stand up for something or someone that
was being wronged? Why does it come to mind as the most important? What was your reaction? How did it
resolve or complicate the situation?

Was there ever a situation in your life where you did not act with integrity? Why did you choose to do wrong?
What impact did it have on the people that you loved? What lasting impact did it have on you?
Now that we have identified the overall things that trigger the strongest emotions in you and a few major
incidents where your actions/reactions shaped you, I would like to address the concept of forgiveness. Often
the things that cause us the most amount of emotion, good or bad, are the hardest to let go of. And the
concept of forgiveness is so strongly engrained with honesty. You can’t pretend to truly forgive someone. So
the next few questions are designed to enlighten you to your own ability to surrender your emotions in order
to move on in your life.

In general do you find it hard to forgive others and why?

How long does it generally take for you to forgive others?

What triggers your ability to forgive others? Are you able to identify a pattern?
Is there anyone that you have never been able to forgive? What did they do? Why are you unable to forgive
them?

Have you ever been in a position where you had to ask someone else for forgiveness? What harm did you do to
them? Did you address It or ignore it? If you addressed it, did they forgive you? Were you aware of their
forgiveness process?

Have you ever had to forgive yourself for doing something that caused self-harm, either physically,
emotionally, or spiritually? What was it?
This chapter has challenged you to look deep into that mirror of self and take ownership of the emotions,
actions, and behaviors that have brought you to this path today. Well done. You probably feel wonky, and
rightly so. Most of the time, we are not honest with ourselves- though it is seldom our intention to pull the
wool over our own eyes. It takes a certain kind of ambition to face our own demons, acknowledge our
strengths and weaknesses, and forge a new and enlightened path for our future.

Now that we find ourselves at the end of the chapter on honesty, you are probably realizing that you will never
be done, really, with this chapter. It is suddenly no surprise that all the pages in this book will require you to be
honest with yourself. But you also likely understand why I chose to begin this workbook with a chapter on
honesty, and realize that you just built the foundation for your book of shadows!

And now, I will end the chapter with the question that started it, but this time instead of giving a gut reaction
to the question, I want you to think about all the work you have done in this chapter before answering. Some
of you will have the same answer you did in the beginning, and for some of you it will have changed. So
without further ado…

How honest do you feel you are with yourself?

Section 2 : Relationships and Desire

In this section of the shadow workbook, you will be reaching all the way back into your childhood to
understand how your relationship and experiences have shaped your outlook, personality, and behavior. You
may find that you are harboring resentment you didn’t realize you had. You might find that you have regrets
about lost friendships or choices you made or that were made for you. Whether your childhood was
structured, fun, and positive or reckless, dark, and sad- it helped to create your reactions to the world today.
We will talk about the transition between childhood and adulthood and the sexual blossoming that occurs
during that time of growth. Lastly, we will tie it all together with a conversation about your adult relationships

NOTE: In this chapter, when I use the term “parent” understand that I use it loosely as some were raised by
extended family, foster parents, etc.. Read the word the way it best resonates with you. If you need to, cross
out the term “parent” and substitute whatever term you are most comfortable with.

Before we dive too deep into this chapter, I would like to ask you a couple of questions. As with the chapter on
honesty, I want you to answer with your gut reaction. Don’t think too much about it.

Overall, Do you feel like you had a good childhood?

Overall, Are you comfortable with your sexuality?

Overall, are you content with the role you play in your personal relationships?
Thank you for your gut reactions. So, lets begin with a few basic questions about your childhood. Your
answers to these questions will act as a grounding point for much of your work in this chapter. Unlike the
questions you just answered above, I want you to really think about the time you spent as a child before you
answer. Try to think of your entire childhood, up until the time you hit puberty, when formulating your
answers.

Would you Describe your childhood as happy? If not what descriptive word would you choose for your
childhood and why do you feel that way?

Were you raised in any institutionalized religion? What religion was it? Did you ever identify with it and if so
do you still identify with it? How do you feel about being raised with those religious beliefs? What affect do
you feel it (or the lack of it) has on your life today?

Do you feel like your parents provided you with everything you needed, both physically and emotionally?
As a spiritual being, you are so very much affected by your childhood, but moreover your perception of your
childhood. Perhaps through the last few questions you realized that you may have repressed some negative
energy you cultivated in your youth. Maybe you realized that you took some things for granted. Religious
impressions, or a lack thereof more often that not has more of an impact on your belief systems and adult
actions than you may have realized. The framework of your relationships and desires is built on your answers
to the questions above. Next we will work to identify and work through some of your memories from the
earlier years of your life, and try to see how they affect your behaviors today.

When you reflect upon your childhood, what makes you extremely angry to this day? Why? How do you think
it affects your adult life, and your relationship with yourself and others?

When you reflect upon your childhood, what makes you extremely sad to this day? Why? How do you think it
affects your adult life, and your relationship with yourself and others?
What kind of relationships did you have with your extended family? Was spending time with your extended
family important to your upbringing? Did you trust the members of your extended family? Would you say
your memories of these people are generally positive or negative and why?

I would like you to think about your childhood friendships. Were they organic? Did you feel accepted by your
peer group? How do you think your ability or inability to make friends has carried over into your adult life?
Think about your very best childhood friend. How long were you friends? Perhaps you are still friends today.
What lessons about friendship did they teach you? What parts of that friendship do you look for in others in
your adult life? How did that friendship end, or how has it evolved as you and your friend have aged and
matured?

Think about your childhood enemy. Why did you consider them an enemy? What was your relationship like
with them? Were you passive and were they? Or were you confrontational with one another? Why do you
think you acted this way in the situation. Do you still behave this way with people you clash with in your adult
life?

If you had an opportunity to either thank someone that impacted your childhood or confront someone that
wronged you in your childhood which do you think you would pick? Why do you think you would pick good
over bad, or bad over good? Who is the person and what impact did they have on your life? Do you think that
impact changed you as a person?
At this point you are likely craving a juice box and a few minutes of quiet time. Its always a mixed blessing
when a wave of nostalgia takes over, and I would say that it is impossible to analyze any aspect of childhood
without a feeling, smell, or strong memory to come out of left field and knock you off your emotional rocker.
Thank you for really diving deep and allowing your subconscious to bring up those memories. At this point we
have talked about the known. Things you felt, experienced and believed as a child and what behaviors,
attitudes, and emotions have become your truths since. Next I would like to talk about the voids.

What aspect of your childhood do you feel you may have overlooked, or perhaps need to re-evaluate? Do you
think you were a victim in some way? Or perhaps you realize now that your life could have been different
under some other circumstance? Take the time to explain any feelings that come up with this question.

As adults, we realize that no one is perfect. We are able to look at our parents in a different light, and see
situations we lived from another perspective. What do you feel like is the most important thing that
happened to you as a child that you have forgiven your parents for? What is the most important thing that you
have been unable to forgive them for? How did this shape your relationship with your parents as an adult?
That was a lot, I know. But you are growing so much during this process. I truly hope that you are seeing the
value to these exercises and starting to see why your sisters and brothers are all so adamant that you must
complete shadow work in order to be able to set pure intentions and have total control over your emotions so
that you are able to properly channel energy into your craft. That being said, I want you to think back to the
questions you answered above. Perhaps even read through them once again. Consider the good and bad
memories that come up… how you felt about them then, and what you think about them now. After really
doing some soul searching, letting go of some things, working through others… think about the new
perspectives and unearthed memories you have. Once you feel in control and confident in the overall concept
of YOUR childhood, answer this question again, but in more depth.

Overall, do you think you had a good childhood? Why do you hold that answer as your truth? What lasting
impacts did your childhood have on you as an adult?
This seems like a fair time to transition into the next phase of your life, which will (hopefully) be close to the
time of your first sacred moon cycle, or for the men completing this book, your introduction to manhood. I am
going to start with primal questions centered around sexuality and desire. I understand that this may be a very
difficult section to work with. Remember that the harder this section is to complete, the more important it is
that you complete it. Passion exists in all of us, and often, it burns in the area of sex. You will need to be able
to have control of your emotions in this area in order to be effective in your craft. You have the strength to face
your truths in regards to your sexuality. There is no easy way to begin these questions, so I am just going to rip
off the band aid.

How comfortable are you being naked? Do you have any personal “rules’ around it? Why do you think you feel
this way?

At what age was your first sexual experience? Where did it take place? Was it consensual? How did you feel
during the experience and what emotions did you find yourself having to work through afterwards? Do you
feel like your first sexual experience had a lasting affect on your physical relationships now?

At what age did you loose your virginity? Was it consensual? What were the circumstances? Did you feel
pressured or were you comfortable with your decision before and after. How did you feel once your virginity
was lost? Did you see it as a loss or a triumph? Did you feel conflicted in regards to your religious beliefs?
Were you comfortable confiding in a friend or family member about the event? How did the loss of your
virginity affect your sexual relationships as an adult?
What is your current situation in regards to being sexually active? If you have a lover, are you comfortable with
your partner? If you have casual sexual relations, are you fulfilled? If you are not sexually active, is it by choice?
Regardless of your sexual standing, are you happy in your current situation? When you take a lover, are you
willing to be honest with them about your needs and desires?

What do you consider to be your secret sexual desire? Does this desire make you feel dirty/are you
embarrassed by it? Have you considered acting on it? What holds you back if you have not acted on it? How do
you feel about your experience if you have or currently do act on it? When did you first realize that you had
this desire?

How honest are you with yourself about your sexual preferences? Have you considered or desired to
experience a sexual relationship with the opposite gender of the one you currently entertain? If you have, how
did you feel about the experience? If you haven’t, ask yourself why not? Do you think the feelings you have
affect the actions you take in your current sexual relationship?
For some of you, I’m sure that was really awkward. I hope you feel empowered now that you have worked
through it, and that you are able to shape your relationships going forward around your sexual truths. For
those of you who breezed through that section, be grateful. The stigmas that go along with the sexual aspects
of humanity can be crippling, and can create a darkness where there really should be freedom and light. My
recommendation if you are still struggling with shame in regards to your sexuality is to seek out more
questions or create your own in regards to sex and sexuality. Perhaps you want to explore your gender
identity. Maybe it would benefit you to break down your own fears by using toys or pornography to open your
sexual horizons. Overall, there are very few people that don’t express their sexuality in one way or another,
although many people are unwilling or unable to embrace it. This is, however, essential to overcome in order
to obtain clarity in your life, as it a root of being. Life is dependent on sex.

Now that you have worked through some basic memories and truths in regards to sex and desire, I will ask you
to answer this question again…

Overall, are you comfortable with your sexuality? Have you always been and if so what part of your upbringing
do you attribute that freedom to? If you haven’t always been, what emotions did you have to work through to
break down those walls? How do you feel about your sexual awakening?
Sexuality seems to always be a bit taboo, so you may feel like you are out of the woods with your shadow work.
However next we will uncover the idiosyncrasies of your relationships. Of everything we have talked about in
this section, relationships are probably the hardest. That is because it really is the area where an individual has
the most responsibility, and yet the least amount of control. Childhood happens to you, sex is passionate but
fleeting… relationships are long, trying, but moreover take TWO people, who are always at least a tiny bit
different. So there is a balancing act. And you are always in your own spotlight. You cant escape it, thought at
times you will want to. Other times you will be ecstatic to be in it and want to share its light with anyone that
will see! So lets begin…

What type of people do you seem to attract? What type of people do you tend to be attracted to? Why do you
think you have these desires? How do you think the type of people you are attracted to have effected your life
so far?

What roll do you tend to play in your relationships? Is this role consistent with platonic and romantic partners?
If you play a different roll in your platonic than your romantic relationships, why do you think that is? Do you
feel more comfortable in one over the other?
Was that an eye opener? With relationships, humans tend to fall into patterns and often spend so much time
trying to juggle their emotions and the emotions of others, that they just keep pushing forward with little
regards as to what is happening in their peripheral vision. It is important to stop and identify patterns in your
relationships and actions with others. Less you find yourself playing a broken record with your relationships.
So lets look first at your role in the relationships you have.

In your adult relationships, do you handle your feelings in healthy and constructive ways? Is it easier for you to
have romantic or platonic relationships? Why do you think that is?

Do you find yourself projecting certain aspects of yourself onto others in your life? What parts of you do you
tend to project? Why do you think that is?
Spend a moment thinking about the people that you admire most. What traits do they have that make you
admire them? Do you mirror those traits? Do you see the potential in yourself to be able to someday be like
them?

What traits are you most critical about with your romantic partner? Your family? Your platonic friends? Why
do you think you hold so much negativity with these traits? If the things that bother you differ with the type of
relationship you have with someone, why do you think that is?

How do you react when something in one of your relationships doesn’t go the way you think it should? Why
do you think you have that reaction?
Okay, so now that you have reflected on your role in the relationships you have with those around you, lets
look at the things that you don’t have control over. Yikes, right? We like to believe that if we say the right
things, make the right moves, keep those around us happy… that things will stay happy and carefree.
Unfortunately nothing in relationships is static. Even in the mundane daily actions of routine, you never can
be sure what is boiling under the surface in someone else. Just as they have no real idea what thoughts are
plaguing your mind.

In a relationship, how do you feel when your intentions are misunderstood? Do you feel misunderstood often?
What is your behavior in a situation where you know someone isn’t understanding where you are coming
from?

How do you feel in your relationships when you are suddenly moved to the backburner of that persons life?
Are you able to take it in stride, evaluate the situation, and maintain a relationship with the person? Do you
take it personally and say or do things that affect the relationship in ways that can’t be taken back? Why do
you think you behave this way in this situation?
Think about the relationships you have had in the past, both romantic and platonic. Do you tend to be more
compatible with introverts, or extroverts? Why do you think that is? Do you think that this has a large impact
on the way your relationships play out?

What role does religion play in your relationships with others? Are you able to be open to others spirituality?
Does this differ between romantic and platonic relationships? Do you think you would ever end a relationship
over differences in religion?

How much are your relationship affected by the thoughts and opinions of others? Do you tend to find yourself
defending yourself in your relationships? Why do you think you do or don’t have to defend yourself?
Do you tend to find yourself involved in romantic relationships with controlling partners? Do you find yourself
being controlling in your relationships? Why do you think this is ? Are there certain aspects of a romantic
relationship that you feel you MUST have full control of? Why is that?

How do you react in your relationships when someone tries to manipulate you? Is your reaction different
between family, friends, and love interests? If so, why do you think you allow yourself to be manipulated in
different situations?

In relationships, everyone gives and receives love differently. Think about the important people in your life,
and what there love languages are (words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, physical
touch). Do you tend to be attracted to a people with a certain love language? What is your love language? Do
you prefer relationships with people that give and accept love in the same way you do?
It can be very frustrating when you don’t feel like you have control in a relationship, but even worse is when
you don’t have a choice but to have a relationship with someone. For most adults, this happens in a workplace
situation. A workplace can be an office, retail store or restaurant, or for head of households can be dealing
with activities like sports teams, PTA groups, doctors offices, or other mandatory situations you are mostly
forced to participate in. The next few questions will be centered around “forced” relationships.

If you could completely remove one person from your live, who would it be and why?

Think about the person from the question above. What bothers you most about them? Do you share that
trait? Do you share any personality traits with that person? Do you think shared personality traits might have
something to do with your dislike of that person?

How does it affect you when you are suddenly put into situations to work closely with others that you are not
fond of? Are you able to share your ideas and opinions? Are you able to stand up for yourself during conflict?
Why do you think you behave that way?
Do you find yourself in conflict with others often? Do you react to conflict differently in person versus in
writing (via letters, social media, Ext)? Do you prefer mediation during conflict or privacy to work directly with
that person and why?

How do you react to gossip? Do you find yourself engaging in it? Do you tend to be the one initiating gossip?
How to you respond to gossip about someone you have a personal relationship with? Why do you think that
this is your reaction?

How do you respond when you feel like you or someone you love is experiencing unfair treatment? Where do
you think that reaction comes from? Do you feel good about the way you react to these types of situations?
Relationships are SO complicated. Throughout this entire section you have reflected on the different people in
your life, from childhood to present- what roles they play(ed) and what affect they have on your life. Very
likely you were able to identify some patterns that are healthy and some you may want to be cognizant of and
avoid falling into in future relationships. Now that you have had time to wade through all the emotional muck
of your relationships and your role in them, I would like to revisit the question I asked at the beginning of this
section.. but this time I want you to think through all the questions you have answered and take them in
considerations when responding to it.

Overall, are you content in the role you play in your personal relationships? What things about your
relationships do you think you will attempt to change in the future? What about your actions in a relationship
do you think you would benefit from changing?
Section 3: Fear

There is no escaping it, everyone is afraid of something. Fear is an interesting creature because its very widely
accepted-and yet so personal. This section is important, but will be quite a bit shorter than the previous
sections in this workbook. There are different types of fear and we will cover a few of the basics, but before we
get started I want you to answer the following question with your gut reaction. Once again don’t think too
much about the answer.

What is your biggest fear?

As humans, we are subject to three different kinds of fears; primal, irrational, and rational. You may not have
even identified that some of the things you feel in life are actually considered fear! Often we label things as
anxiety… but that anxiety is borne of fear! First lets talk about Primal fears. The next few questions are going
to deal with some of the most brass tacks facts of human existence… and the fear that results from them.

Are you afraid of death? Are you afraid to die? What frightens you about the concept of death? Does your
religion affect your mindset around death and dying?

What is your reaction to being separated from the people you love? Are you afraid you could be abandoned by
them? Do you tend to have a fear of rejection when opening yourself to new people and relationships?

What roll does fear of humiliation play in your life? Does this keep you from experiencing new things or
following dreams you may have? What kind of success do you think you could have if you conquered your fear
of humiliation?
While all of the fears above are things that have undoubtedly crossed your mind before, I hope you were able
to explore them a bit more deeply, and think about ways you can keep them from negatively impacting your
actions. This will for sure take concentrated effort, as primal fears are the hardest to overcome. Next, we are
going to tackle irrational fears. Irrational fears, or phobia, is an extreme, unwarranted fear linked to a specific
object or event. Irrational fears are interesting because they vary so widely from person to person.

What do you consider to be your most irrational fear? What is your reaction when faced with something that
ignites that fear in you? In what way does this fear manifest in you? Why do you think you have this fear?

When you think about your fears, what is at their center? Are you more afraid of the powers of humanity or
the powers of the paranormal? Is it animals or insects that you fear? Or do your fears tend to be more
environmental, such as heights or travel? Why do you think your fears tend to manifest to that regard?

How do you handle your irrational fears? Do you feel the strength to face them? If you do face them, do you
prefer to face them alone, or have assistance from someone else? What impact will these fears have on your
life if you do not address and overcome them?

How patient are you with the irrational fears of others around you? Do you find humor in taunting them? Are
you supportive to helping them overcome them? Do you feel that the people in your life support you in
overcoming yours?
Just thinking about irrational fears is exhausting, but irrational fears are truly the easiest to overcome. It really
comes down to if the effect that fear will have on your life is worth the time and energy to overcome it! The
final type of fear is rational fears. Rational fear is a reaction to a real or perceived threat in which we must
defend ourselves, the unpleasant feeling that accompanies the realization that you may be in danger . These
fears are more linear and shared by the mass of society. Examples of rational fears are poverty, animal
attacks, car accidents, loss of a loved one, spending your life alone or disappointing someone you love.

Think about the real life situations that scare you. What would you say your biggest rational fear is? What
steps do you take to avoid the realization of this fear?

How do you think your life would change if you fell victim to the real life fear you expressed in y0ur answer
above? Do you think there could be any positive outcome? How do you think your mental health would be
affected in this situation?

What rational fears do you find “silly”? Are you impatient with the people that have this fear? Have you ever
experienced a situation that resulted in you obtaining a new rational fear, and given you a new perspective of
one of those “silly fears”?
Most of the time people avoid thinking too much about their fears, so well done tackling that demon.
Understanding your fear may not completely remove it from your mind, but it can give you some tools to stay
calmer when those fears are triggered. Now that we have identified the different kind of fears, really think
about the concept of fear and how it affects the choices you make in your life. Also think about your reactions
to situations where your different types of fears have been triggered. Once you have thought all of that
through revisit this question that I asked you at the beginning of this section.

What is your biggest fear? Why would you say that it is your biggest fear? What steps do you think you would
need to take to overcome this fear? If left unchecked, what affects could this fear have on your life?
Section 4: Remorse and Realizations

Life happens, and 92% (approximately, ha!) of it is reacting to situations… because you can plan all you want-
but things happening behind the scenes tend to pop up when you least expect them. The bottom line is that
we really don’t have control over what happens to us, but we do have control over our reactions. Sometimes
we are proud of our reactions to situations, others not so much. Usually it’s the reactions that we are NOT
proud of that haunt us, and that we need to work through. As in the beginning of each section, I want you to
follow your gut reaction when I ask the next few questions. There are no right or wrong answers.

What is your biggest regret in life so far?

What has been the most eye opening experience in your life so far?
Perhaps the answers to those questions came to you rather quickly, perhaps not. Either way dealing with
things that draw negative energy out of our memory banks is never comfortable, so be proud that you put
those answers down on paper. Negativity is never our first choice, so to begin this section we are going to look
at some of the situations that have put you in a headspace to react in a way you may regret in the first place.

Lets first think about a major landmark in your life that led to you acting in a way that you are not proud of.
What happened? What was your reaction, and do you feel justified in it? If you could write a letter to the
person that put you in that situation what would it say?

Under what circumstances do you tend to cultivate behaviors that you later regret? Would you say that you
play a role in those situations, or are you a victim of them?

Is there a certain type of person that triggers you to behave in a less than admirable way? Why do you think
that is?
It is quite a bit easier to point the finger at someone else when we find ourselves in uncomfortable situations…
but when you find yourself often in the same type of situations, you need to ask yourself what the common
denominator is. The good news is, if the answer is YOU, then you are suddenly elevated to a different state of
awareness and have far more control over the situation than you originally thought! I really want you to put
some thought into the next few questions when answering.

Have you ever realized that a situation that you reacted badly to was your fault? What happened and how did
you react? When did you realize that you were wrong? What did you do when you made that realization?

Think about a time when you treated someone badly. At the time, did you feel like they deserved it? If not
what was your motivation to behave that way? How did the person react? Is this person still in your life?

What is the one habit that you cant seem to break that more often than not lands you in hot water? Why do
you think you repeat that behavior?
What is a situation in which you could have done something different, but were too stubborn? What was the
result of your behavior?

Have you ever acted in a way that hurt someone that you loved so much that they walked away from you? At
the time did you realize what you were doing? Did you ever get the chance to make amends?

Think about a time in your life where you were totally and completely wrong, and your behavior ended up
costing someone else you cared about something that was important to them. If you were to write a letter to
them taking accountability for your actions what would it say?
Ouch, right? Whew- that was NOT easy. But, you made it through and I hope you find yourself stronger for
doing so! Regret is one of the most devastating things you will carry with you in your life, it is also one of the
things in life that you can learn the most from. People tend to lock their regrets up in tiny boxes in their heads
and try not to think about them. But much like the beating of the tell-tale heart, remorse does not tend to
fade, but instead grows louder and louder until we emotionally explode. Now that you have looked a bit
deeper into some situations in your life, your role and the role of others, I would like you to revisit the question
I asked earlier. You may find that during your introspection, your answer may have changed.

What is your biggest regret in life so far? Why do you put this at the top of the list? What role did you play in
this situation? Was your reaction fair? How did it affect others? Is there any way for you to find redemption?
Well, there is only one way to go from here, and that is forward. I believe that once we work through and take
responsibility for our most primal thoughts, beliefs, and actions we are in a place of awakening, and can better
identify our emotions. We have come to the “Realization” portion of the workbook, and I would invite you to
bear your soul here, as you have already come so very far! You may find that you have answers you have been
seeking right inside of you!

What is one thing that you would like to heal from? Was it your fault in the first place? How have you avoided
it happening again?

How do you deal with situations in which you fail to meet your own expectations?

Have you been able to forgive the people that have hurt you? Have you been able to forgive yourself for
hurting others?
What do you consider to be your biggest challenge? Why do you feel this way? Could you be making this
harder for yourself that it needs to be? Do you feel that there may be a different way to approach this
challenge that could perhaps make it more manageable?

When you do something positive in your life, how do you reward yourself for doing so? Are you content with
celebrating your accomplishments privately, or do you need outside influences in order to be satisfied? Why
do you think that is?

When you feel great sadness, how does it manifest in you? How do you think you could cope with that sadness
in a healthy way? Do you think you can do this?
What is one thing you wish you had said, but never did? Who did you need to say this to? Is it possible to get
another opportunity to say it?

How do you think you have changed in the past ten years? If you could go back and communicate with the
person you were 10 years ago, what would you choose to say to yourself? Do you think you would listen?

Think about all the things you hold against yourself. If you could write a letter to yourself apologizing for all
that self-blame, what would it say?
There is so much that we hold inside, and this workbook was designed to help you dislodge your secret truths
from the dark spaces in your mind. Hold them, see them for what they are, and decide if what was-still is. To
see things from childhood with an adults wisdom, to take your expectations of situations and strip them down
to find what was right and wrong in YOUR behavior. Now that you have accomplished so much in regards to
personal honesty and growth, look inside yourself and to all of the answers you have committed to paper and
revisit the question I asked at the beginning of this section.

What has been the most eye opening experience in your life so far? What do you think you learned? What did
you believe about that experience that has now changed? Are you glad you had that experience? Do you think
it helped shape you into the person you are today?
Section 5: Rebirth

If you have made it this far, you should find yourself elevated in personal awareness to the point that you can
be secure and clear in your intentions. This will help you to hone your skill in your craft, and be successful in
ways of magic! This will be a short section, as the hard work has been done, and your personal path is
unfolding before you! These last few questions are just meant to be both a reminder and a roadmap to where
you want to go in your life. Enjoy these questions! You have learned to harness your honesty in a clear and
constructive way!

Do you think you could have more trust in others? How can you achieve this?

The way you spend your daily life is the way you will spend the rest of your life. How do you feel about that?

In your absolute dream life, how does your perfect day begin? Can you begin your day that way now?
Epilogue

I want to thank you for utilizing my workbook as a guide to deeper self knowledge. I hope that you have found
the time you spent with it to be fulfilling. At the time I am writing this, I myself have not answered any of the
questions in this workbook, and will in fact start facing these truths once this booklet has been shared. The
reason for this, is that I was hoping to create the flow of the questions, and the questions themselves, without
tainting and muddling them with my own “stuff”. I am looking forward to finding myself through this
workbook, and I truly hope that we will all come out of it with a deeper understanding of ourselves and of the
situations we have encountered along the paths of our lives. Thank you again for experiencing this with me.

Blessed Be!!!