ISTP – The Tinkerer, The Virtuoso,

ISTP – The Tinkerer, INFJ – The Sage

ISTP – The Logical Pragmatist, INFJ – The Insightful Visionary

What they look for – Dependability

- Most compatible with partners who are decisive and trustworthy

- Sensual individuals that they are, Virtuosos make ready use of all of their senses, viewing intimacy as
an art, a performance, and a source of pleasure.
- ISTPs don’t tend to adhere to strict traditions and are open to exploring the physical side of a
relationship early on. They are very sensual and enjoy intimacy as an expression of creativity and
pleasure. For many ISTPs, physical intimacy will be how they are closest to expressing feelings and
emotions. They struggle with expressing emotions in other situations. However, they will most
definitely express how they are feeling physically with their partners.
-  ISTPs will step up to help you, even if you don’t ask for it. And they will have a natural eye for
making your life easier. They likely won’t say many emotional words, but they’ll be the first to
support you when you need it.
- While the ISTP can commit in a relationship, they also value their independence and will do best
with a partner who can give them the space they need to thrive.
- ISTPs are world savvy. ISTPs rove the streets, confident in their keen eye. This personality type is as
far away from gullible as Pluto is from the sun. You’re unlikely to pull one over on them. If dating
someone who can size you up frightens you, ISTPs are not the personality for you. But if you need
someone who has the street smarts to keep you out of trouble, this type is a strong contender for
your dating life.
- To love ISTP — give them space. One of the most independent of all the Myers-Briggs personality
types, the live-in-the-moment ISTP will need more space than others. Space to tinker with their
projects in their private world alone. Space to change their mind, change their plans, and just relax
and go with the flow. Yes, although this type may fool you with their seemingly boundless energy for
exploration, they are, nevertheless, quite introverted. Of course, this doesn’t mean you should
ignore your ISTP. Always up for (quiet) thrills, ISTPs feel a sense of intimacy when embarking on
adventures together. So, when your ISTP emerges from their solitude, suggest a hike together on a
new trail — or ask them to show you what they’ve been working on in the garage, and watch their
face light up.
- The truth is that The Tinkerers are rarely the romantic type. They won’t be the ones to serenade you
while holding a bouquet of freshly picked chrysanthemums. But if they sincerely love somebody
they will adapt to their partner’s needs and will be supportive of them. Also, their ability to look at
things objectively allows them to realize their own mistakes.
- While not casual daters, ISTPs don’t actively look for long-term relationships. However, a person
who can bring color into the ISTP’s life makes a date worthwhile for the ISTP.
- The ISTP looks for a fun, dynamic relationship that can engage their senses. While faithful to their
partner, ISTPs they need most are autonomy and respect, or else they feel stifled. Not the most
expressive type, the ISTP will show love through practical acts of service.
- What an ISTP Looks for in a Relationship - ISTPs prefer a relationship with the following key aspects:
Novelty, Freedom, Independence
- What an ISTP will seek first and foremost is an intriguing partner who brings new adventures to the
ISTP’s life. Always curious and looking for fun, the ISTP enjoys an ever-changing relationship that
supports their personal freedom in the long-term.
- What an ISTP Needs in a Relationship - While ISTPs enjoy spending time with their partner, they take
their space seriously. In a relationship, they need their independence and time alone to work on
their hobbies or whatever new passion has their attention at the time.
- Continual growth and flux in the relationship are what ISTPs crave – they don’t feel comfortable with
boring long-term stability. As curious, hands-on explorers, ISTPs need room to try new things
without feeling stuck or controlled.
- What an Ideal Relationship for an ISTP Looks Like - For an ISTP, the best relationship is one with
endless mutual respect and understanding. As relatively indifferent as they seem, ISTPs are deep in
their commitment but prefer to avoid overcomplications. Ideally, a relationship with honest
conversation, minimal drama, and a good balance of one-on-one time with their partner and time
on their own is most desirable.
- What is an ISTP in love like? - Once an ISTP has fallen in love, they will do anything in their power to
make the relationship work. Although emotions and physical expression aren’t the ISTP’s strongest
suits, they are ready to adapt and welcome a partner into their life completely. Sharing experiences
with their partner is important to them. As such, ISTPs are willing to accept any critiques that help
them improve and grow together in the relationship.
- How an ISTP Knows They are in Love - A key sign that an ISTP is in love is if they begin to genuinely
want to get to know more about a person. While obvious for almost any person, for ISTPs who don’t
bother with things that don’t interest them from the get-go, it’s a good indicator of the early stages
of deeper feelings. Additionally, they may express a desire to do activities together, particularly
hobbies dear to the ISTP’s heart. Since ISTP’s prefer to do their thing alone, wanting to spend time
with a specific person is another sign.
- How an ISTP Shows Love - As logical beings, ISTPs show love through practical, pragmatic means.
This can range from helping with chores to offering solutions to a partner’s issues. ISTPs may invite
their partner to do something fresh and unique together, in their pursuit of trying new things.
- ISTP Love Language - ISTPs provide and prefer to receive love through acts of service, but in some
cases, they may not mind physical touching. Overall, ISTPs quietly express love by doing helpful
chores and assisting their partner in a personal feat. Unlike other types, ISTPs do this to share in the
experience rather than just to reduce their partner’s workload.
- How to Love an ISTP Long Term - A long-term relationship requires a partner who is understanding.
Because ISTPs don’t share their emotions freely, their partner must be able to see through their
actions and appreciate the implied hints of love. Being patient and supportive of the ISTP’s passions,
no matter how ever-changing they may seem, is a vital component, without being overcritical.
Loving an ISTP may require getting used to their bluntness while being able to express personal
feelings plainly. as well as spending time doing sensory, action-oriented projects.
- Is an ISTP Romantic? - Generally, the ISTP is not viewed as the most romantic personality type.
Preferring to use reason over emotions, they don’t waste time with frivolous displays of romance.
Instead, they are happy to help a partner solve a problem, fix up things around the house, or
partake in experiences together regarding a mutual interest. When intimate, an ISTP can open
themselves up a bit more romantically.
- ISTPs don’t take things personally when given criticism or faced with a partner’s feedback. In fact,
they prefer to know right away to develop the relationship in whatever way they can. They are
happy to integrate their life with their partner’s life immediately.
- ISTPs hate the following things: When things stay the same. All theory and no hands-on experience.
Dealing with drama and messy emotions. Feeling stuck or trapped in the same place. Not getting
enough alone time. Rules, regulations, and protocols. Depending on others for everything. When
people overthink things.
-

How to love an ISTP

Ask your ISTP what its love languages are. Many ISTPs need physical touch. I personally also need quality
time, however, I also need personal space. Different ISTPs have different levels of personal space needs.
(Maybe try to figure out what his Enneagram Tritype & instinctual variant is, that can assist in knowing
his needs and triggers).

Be consistent. Be straightforward. Be honest. Be genuine. If you say you’re going to do something, do it.
If something is wrong, share it with your ISTP and ask him how it can be fixed. ISTPs love fixing stuff,
even relationship problems.

If you just want to vent and don’t want a solution, tell your ISTP ahead of time and ASK if you can vent to
him for a specified amount of time (5–10 min). The time limit helps because personally, if I feel like there
is no end to your complaining, I’ll only be able to think about how I can exit this situation and I’ll be less
likely to want to be around you in the future.

Make your ISTP your top priority, without being smothering. Be loyal. Be trustworthy. Let your ISTP
know on a regular basis that you value them and appreciate what they do for you, be specific, give
examples of the things that you like. And make sure whatever you say is genuine. We hate fake
compliments. Personally, I need my partner to see my good and bad sides, to love who I am as a person
(I don’t know if all ISTPs need that or if that is an Enneagram 4 need). I hate it when my partner tells me
I’m perfect, I feel like they don’t SEE me, and then I don’t feel loved, because I know I’m not perfect, so
their love feels fake, it feels like they’re idealizing me.

Never TELL your Istp what to do. Tell them what you want and tell them what you think; be specific.
Give your ISTP options. We NEED freedom of choice because of Ni Child. If NI child feels trapped or
controlled, ISTP can get very angry. You don’t want your ISTP to rage. It is preventable.

You can tell the ISTP how you feel, but be careful of your wording so you don’t sound manipulative. We
can’t trust people who resort to manipulation. Be direct, try to get to the point instead of going on and
on, that gets terribly irritating.

Some ISTPs have developed Fe and others haven’t. Some will be afraid of feelings and some won’t. Do
NOT attempt to guilt them or manipulate them, eventually they will figure out what you tried to do and
it may turn off your ISTP.

Try not to be annoying. ISTPs are very sensitive to what annoys us. If we feel annoyed, give us space. We
need alone time to recharge. We need time to think.
Don’t try to force us to be social.

Listen to your ISTP. You don’t have to agree, but it would be wise to acknowledge and validate us. Then
you can tell us what you think. Our Ti needs to be listened to. We love teaching people what we know.
We will love it if you are teachable.

Share experiences with us. Introduce us to new things, show us possibilities and we’ll decide if we want
to do it or not.

Do the “little things,” the ISTP will notice when you’re being considerate and thoughtful (at least, I notice
those things)

Some ISTPs like talking about theories and some don’t. We all definitely like practicality. I like theory
that I can experiment with and apply into reality.

Many ISTPs are very giving. Our Fe is a 3 year old, it’s difficult NOT to give, we want to make you happy,
and we show love through actions. Many of us have felt taken advantage of in our lives several times.
Don’t take advantage of our kindness.

Be there for us. Don’t abandon us. If you work hard for the relationship, the ISTP will work hard for the
relationship. We take our close relationships seriously. Many of us don’t have too many close friends, so
we cherish the ones we do have. We’re not afraid of difficult times, we grow the most when we have a
challenge to overcome.

ISTP needs respect

Often times we just don’t care (Fi demon function). If it’s important to you, then maybe try to inspire us
to care, give us a good reason why we should care. Some ISTPs will be more stubborn than others,
different maturity levels obviously, and different levels of pride/humility. If you are dating a healthy
ISTP, congratulations you hit the jack pot! … if they like you back. :)

Outlines the ISTP-INFJ dynamic really well:

https://www.truity.com/type-relationship-advisor/I/S/T/P/I/N/F/J

https://www.truity.com/type-relationship-advisor/I/N/F/J/I/S/T/P