DNA Magazine Issue 177
DNA Magazine Issue 177
DNA Magazine Issue 177
ROCK
A FIRST
DATE
® m a d e t h a t w ay
TORONTO
WORLD PRIDE
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WAS I A
TEENAGED
PREDATOR?
AMEN’S
BRIEF HISTORY
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UNDERWEAR
FAT AND
FUNNY AT 40!
ADAM RICHARD
AFRICA
AND NOW FOR SOME
GOOD NEWS
#177
»
ON THE COVER
JACK JEFFERSON
BY ANDY THOMAS
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DNA (ISSN 1443-1122) is published monthly in Australia and the UK by DNA Men Nexus used to illustrate editorial do not depict the real lives, behaviour or sexuality of the
Who's Hot? Pty Ltd, PO Box 127 Lidcombe, NSW 1825, Australia, and in the USA and Canada under models. Opinions expressed in the magazine are not necessarily those of the publishers.
license to DNA Men Nexus Pty Ltd (Aust). DNA and Made That Way are registered Unsolicited editorial or photographic material is welcome but will not be returned unless
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Story starts No part of DNA may be reproduced in whole or in part without written permission from lost or damaged in transit. DNA is printed by Rotary Offset Press and distributed by
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page 102. editorial or advertising in no way suggests sexual or political orientation. Photographs Australia. For newsagency enquiries: 1300 131 169. October 2014
4 DNA
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10 FROM THE EDITOR
Good news from Africa.
14 BURNTTOAST
Readers’ letters.
CONTENT 177 #
16 BURNTTOAST 2
Sexy Santa speedo run. 30 “Five Seconds Of
18 LOVING
Flag togs, acrobats, ballroom and Summer make
beefcake. One Direction look
20 MONTH IN A MINUTE like circuit queens
The stuff that went down. on a break from a
porn shoot.” – See
32 34
30 MUSIC
Ariana Grande, Anthony Callea, full album review,
Morrissey, La Roux, 5 Seconds
Of Summer. page 30.
32 BOOKS
Rio Men by Leo Castro and more.
34 BOOKS MORE
A Thing Of Beauty from Cocky
Boys Studio.
36 STYLE
38 100 Opinion
The perfect shoe for every occasion. 38 #JUST SAYING
The so-called “bromance”.
39 NUTTIER THAN A
84
SQUIRREL TURD 45 VERUSHKA DARLING
Oh, those crazy haters!
Yearning for the bad old days.
40 STRAIGHT MATE
Blake “Bachelor” Garvey. The Back Passage
42 COMMON MORTALS
Christopher’s first Halloween. 112 TREVOR ASHLEY
44 DEAR DIVA
Life’s questions, answered! 102 Samples
104 GROOMING
Hot first date? Lee Kynaston suggests
some tricks for your trade. 22 ANTHONY CALLEA
The time her Maj offered him a lift!
106 FITNESS
Matt Chapman has the sexy V. He tells 24 PENTATONIX
us how to get it, too. They’re the voice.
6 DNA
CONTENT 177 #
Features
46 WAS I A TEENAGED
PREDATOR?
Mark E King pursued men for sex when he
was underage. But was he the victim or the
perpetrator?
66 CARRY ON ADAM
Hilarious Adam Richard opens up about his
unhappy childhood and how that shaped his
comedy career.
70 WAIST MANAGEMENT
Yes, it’s the fantastic history of men’s
underwear!
8 DNA
FROM THE EDITOR /Andrew Creagh
contacted for interviews were concerned that a chance for the lucky few to play (Tel Aviv
10 DNA
LATEST SUMMER SWIMWEAR AND UNDERWEAR
COLLECTIONS NOW AVAILABLE
www.funkytrunks.com
/ ON THE COVER
JACK
JEFFERSON
PHOTOGRAPHY ANDY THOMAS JACK’S A LONDON-BASED model (gorgeous),
actor (versatile), gymnast (bangin’ bod) with a
degree in Exercise Science (smart) and, as voted
by DNA online readers, one of the Sexiest Men
Alive (see last issue). We had to get him hot
and wet and into a bunch of different gear from
Rufskin and Timoteo before we shot the perfect
cover. Enjoy!
12 DNA
DNA 13
burnttoast @ dnamagazine.com.au
INSIDE THE MINDS OF DNA READERS! EMAILS, LETTERS, TWEETS, FACEBOOK POSTS, CARRIER PIGEON DISPATCHES AND RAMBLINGS
Send your feedback to [email protected] Or post your burnttoast letters on our website. Go to DNAmagazine.com.au. Letters will be edited for length, clarity and hilarity!
® M A D E T H AT W AY
I’M WRITING TO SUGGEST that you broaden offer and filled the magazine with their stories
your magazine’s apparently rigid preference was incredible. Obviously some stories were
for having all the models’ members pointing better than others but that didn’t matter. I read
dnamagazine.com.au
straight downwards inside their briefs as every one and I felt connected and thankful
opposed to more naturally falling sideways for each of them. Your story is my story if that
FACE-TO-FACE or even leaning slightly upwards against makes sense. Eli Sommers, Washington DC
WITH HATE
IMAGES FROM UGANDA the material. Think of the term “banana Glad you enjoyed it, Eli. We do know what you
AUST $9.95 NZ $10.75 USA $14.99 CANADA $14.99 UK £5.50
REVEALED!
OUR SEXY MAKE-ME-HOT BOYS
straight down, which is a very unnatural way
CRAZY IN LOVE for the guy to fall within such a small swimsuit.
RIMBAUD AND VERLAINE
(OR WHY YOU SHOULDN’T DATE YOUR TEENAGE STALKER!)
It also obscures the rest of the man’s basket
POPE FRANCIS because the downward pointing dick creates
WHAT DID HE REALLY SAY ABOUT US?
#172
Plus: a “tent” and, let’s face it, the bulge behind the
CHER VS TWITTER
MISTER SINGAPORE
DAN AVERY
bulge should be plainly discerned, too.
KYLIE MINOGUE
BRENDAN MACLEAN
AMSTERDAM
There are a good number of us who CRAVE
to see more of your models shown more
naturally. – James Cribbs, Brooklyn, NY
MEN OF James, we love hearing from aficionados such
CARNIVAL
FEATHERS,
SEQUINS AND
as yourself, who appreciate the, er, finer points
SEXY PECS
of what we do. Plus, “models” “members” are
® M A D E T H AT W AY
“rigid” in one sentence is awesome! Comments
VIRGIN taken on board.
ISLANDS SWEET TWEETS
dnamagazine.com.au
TODD SANFIELD’S
FIRST TIME IN PARADISE
TO SEE THE WORDS I wrote in DNA… Whow! @joelcreasey Excuse me pushy
AUSTRALIA
VS EQUALITY (On Reflection #174, It’s Your DNA). That was New York gay bar homosexuals.
WHAT’S GONE I’m on Australian TV sometimes
WRONG?
just wonderful. My heart beat out of my chest as when bigger names cancel.
JOHNNY if I’d won the lottery. Thank you! To all the other Have some respect yeah?
WEIR
AUST $9.95 NZ $10.75 USA $14.99 CANADA $14.99 UK £5.50
DIVORCE IS HELL!
writers who shared their stories, thank you. I feel @louisvirtel “You guys go ahead. I’m staying to
ELECTRO sacrifice myself for Cruella’s glamor.” the gay
SHOCKING
OUR HORRIFIC
privileged to have read them. – Nat In The Naki. dalmatian.
HISTORY
@matthew_mitcham You know you’re gay when
STRIP you threaten to throw a Mariah Carey-sized hissy
JOINTS I WAS REALLY MOVED by Your DNA (#174).
fit & stab someone in the eye with your stiletto
That DNA opened up its pages to the readers
WHERE IN THE
WORLD CAN YOU
NUDE-UP AT THE heel...
BEACH?
was a generous offer. That readers accepted the @TheTweetOfGod The idea that you evolved
#173
Plus: from apes is disgusting. Isn’t it nicer to believe
TASMANIA you descended from one couple and their
incestuous children?
MATTHEW
BOURNE
MIAMI
Which do you prefer? Top left #172 (pointing to
@TTMSonair On a scale of Kirsten Stewart to
LOOKING
LAS VEGAS
the side) or bottom left #173 (pointing down)? Nicki Minaj, how many facial expressions do you
have?
@CommonGayTweets “Grandpa, did you ever
fight in a war?” Well, back in my day, we had fan
READERS’ POLL READERS’ POLL wars on twitter. Little Monsters vs Katycats. Shit
was intense.
Are You Out At Work? How closely do you identify
with the gay community? @EndhooS Arnold Schwarzenegger was 23 years
old before he could spell his own name.
No, nobody Yes, I used to but Only @sixthformpoet Wine only contains 1% of the
knows everyone I don’t any sometimes Recommended Daily Intake of calcium, so
more remember to drink 100 glasses every day.
15% knows 15%
I don’t @KarenWalkerBot Honey, it’s a waste of time.
know
who 16%
51% Very 19% 42% Like exercise. Or reading to your kids.
@nathvalvo The twist in the new bachelor
knows closely tonight is that none of the girls want a career in
media.
18%
Only
some 25%
people Not at all
know
ST
L AT E
POLL
14 DNA
burnttoast @ dnamagazine.com.au
THE FABULOUS SANTA RUN holiday afternoon all for charity. We start
Hello DNA! out with cocktails at noon, everyone get’s
First off, let me say how much my partner into their speedo (or crazy holiday costume)
Karl and I enjoy your magazine. We have been and gets ready to face the cold – it was just
subscribing for over five years now. Every issue 17 degrees Fahrenheit last year – to run one
continues to get better and better. mile through the Boystown neighborhood.
Karl and I have been together for 14 years. Everyone in the neighborhood stops to
We wanted to find a fun way to give back to cheer on the Santas and honk their horns.
the LGBT community. So three years ago in The afternoon continues with door prizes
Chicago, Il (USA) we started a charity event (including two round trip tickets anywhere
called The Most Fabulous Santa Speedo Run. in continental USA), more drinks and a lot of
There are many speedo runs across the United holiday cheer. You can even sit on Sexy Santa’s
States but we believe ours was the first LBGT lap or get in line for our mistletoe kissing
one. On the first Saturday in December we booth for a small donation.
host the run and all money raised is donated We would love DNA readers to see that
to a local LGBT charity. Last year and this Chicago is an awesome city that there is great
year our charity is the Center On Halsted, fun and with cute boys in between LA and
an LGBT community center in Chicago. New York even in winter!
Specifically, the Center On Halsted is building We hope you enjoy these photos and
new housing for 80 LGBT senior citizens and encourage any DNA reader who happens
our donations are supporting that effort. to be in Chicago on December 6 to join
When we started three years ago we were us! They can learn more on our website
hoping for a few friends so show up at a local Mostfabulousstantaspeedorun.com. Thanks
bar and help us raise maybe $300. We ended for your consideration. I know it’s early but
up with 150 people, 50 runners, and raised Happy Holidays!
about $US3,000. The second year we moved Jeff Colgan and Karl Sponholtz.
the event to an amazing bar in Chicago’s Dear Jeff and Karl, we applaud any activity
Boystown called Sidetrack. We grew the event that gets sexy guys into speedos or silly
to 400 participants (150 runners) and raised costumes and we’re doubly impressed that
over $9,000. Last year we flew past our goals it’s all about fundraising for such a great
with on-line registration and fund raising to cause. For non-USA readers, the Santas are
grow the event to over 600 in attendance, 220 running 1.6km in minus 8 Celsius. Eek! At
runners and raising over $21,000. least they have a Sexy Santa's lap to sit on
Our event this year is on Saturday, afterwards to help them warm up. We wish
December 6th at Sidetrack. This is a fun, sexy, all this year’s Santas the very best.
16 DNA
DNA 17
The restuff
we’
Loving… It’s the dance of love, Fran!
Pablo
You’ve seen Mr Hernandez
in the Andrew Christian
ads in DNA and we couldn’t O
DE
resist showing you more. VI
Pablo’s a model/actor/
dancer/personal trainer.
You'll see more of him
at Pablounwrapped.com
or go the Hot Zone at
DNAmagazine.com.au
HOT
ZONE
SOME IMAGES FROM THIS STORY ARE
TOO HOT FOR PRINT. TO SEE THESE
Dancing With Scott – His Way!
It started life as a student play, became a much-loved movie
SHOTS GO TO THE HOT ZONE AT
DNAMAGAZINE.COM.AU/HOTZONE and now Strictly Ballroom is a musical. Boho creative duo Baz
Luhrmann and Catherine Martin are at the helm, naturally!
Transfers from Sydney to Melbourne this month.
Boys On
Poles
In this case Totem
poles. If you’ve
ever seen a Cirque
du Soleil circus
extravaganza you’ll
have marvelled at
the feats of acrobatic
excellence and the
beautiful physiques of
the performers. Totem
arrives in Australia in
October.
O
DE
VI
18 DNA
SEE
MORE
Flag Waving
Expresses your patriotism by slipping your junk into a pair of flag swim briefs
from CA-RIO-CA. Run these up your flagpole and see who sails in! Australia,
Brazil and the USA are featured (above) but go to cariocawear.com for the full
range. If only the United Nations was so bangin’!
PHOTOGRAPHY SEAN GOMES
Darren Palmer
The Aussie interior designer and
The Block judge has dropped his
dacks for a charity budgie bolt.
(Translation for non-Australian
readers: Darren and taken his
pants off and, dressed only in
a red swimming brief, has run Noble Sacrifices
around the block to raise money.) Archie Andrews, star of the Archie comic-book series of 70
The beneficiary is Youngcare, who years, has been killed. Taking an assassin’s bullet intended
aim to provide accommodation for his gay friend, Kevin Keller, Archie’s heroic sacrifice
for young Australians with special comes as America celebrates its increasing gay rights but
needs. It seems the “budgie bolt” grapples with gun control issues. “Archie is a very iconic,
is now a thing – go to page 16 of all-American hero,” says Jono Jarrett of Geeks OUT. “To
this issue for more proof. have him literally take a bullet for the ideas of diversity
For more on Youngcare go to and equality in a comic book is a very powerful statement.”
youngcare.com.au or facebook. Archie’s death occurs in a flash-forward story series and
com/YoungcareOz won’t effect his life in the main Archie comic series.
DNA 19
/ MONTH IN A MINUTE
I’ve had letters from fans who want me to
present… an explicit [gay] male sex scene – most of
the letters come from women.
– George RR Martin, author of the Game Of Thrones series.
(Right) Short-lived Game Of Thrones gay character Renly Baratheon, played by Gethin Anthony.
PRESIDENT OBAMA signs an executive Following the overturning of Uganda’s anti-gay laws,
order banning workplace discrimination a Gay Pride event is held in Entebbe with police
against gay and transgender people by permission. “This event is to bring us together.
the federal government and government Everyone was in hiding before because of the anti-
contractors. Private employers are still homosexuality law,” said organiser Sandra Ntebi. “It
allowed to fire employees for being gay in is a happy day for all of us, getting together.”
32 states.
20 DNA
/ SAMPLES
“DON’T
FUCK
THIS
UP!” ›› That’s how
Anthony Callea
psyched himself
for his live
recording of
George Michael
songs. It seemed
to work! He tells
Andrew Creagh
about the show,
close encounters
with divas, and
the time the
Queen offered
him a lift!
Anthony Callea’s Ladies And
Gentlemen, The Songs Of
George Michael was recorded
live at The Palms, Crown Casino
in Melbourne with a nine-piece
band. Special guests include
O
DE Casey Donovan, John Foreman
VI and Anthony’s partner,
Tim Campbell.
22 DNA
don’t think we’ll do that! Although, you’ve put gave me a gift and made a little speech.
the idea in my head now so, who knows, maybe Did you tear up? No, I’m not a crier. She’d
DNA’s entertainment writer, Marc one drunk night we will! just rock up to the sound check with wet hair
Andrews, reviews your new album in this Please Instagram it! No way! I might Tweet and some mineral water. She was so cool.
issue and says, “this might just be the it though. Were any of the divas less friendly? One,
best album Anthony has ever made.” On the DVD and CD there’s a great in particular, gave me a protocol sheet, which
Anthony Callea: Wow. Well, there’s 30 years reunion between you and Casey I promptly tore up. It said we had to dress in
of George Michael’s music as inspiration. I Donovan for I Knew You Were Waiting… black and if she walks past don’t acknowledge
admire the way he can go from a beautiful That was a spine tingling moment and you can her. I’m sorry, I only accept a protocol sheet
ballad to a cheeky song like Outside, which was see that in the footage. We hadn’t performed from the Queen!
really a “fuck you” to the police. I love that he together for 10 years. My mum said she almost Who you have also met! Yes, and it was a
embraced that situation [being busted having cried. Casey sang her tits off and she’s got big total Kath And Kim moment. I was introduced to
toilet sex by an undercover LA cop]. Most tits – she’s the first to make that joke, by the her by the Australian Prime Minister of the day
people would run and hide but he owned it. way! I love and respect her. Her voice these days and I was so nervous. I thought I was going to
Marc also reckons you have “class, is flawless. I saw her perform at a little club in stuff it up. But this weird thing happened… The
sophistication and a swaggering Melbourne recently and thought, “The world Queen gets a security escort back to the airport
sexuality”. [Laughing] If you knew me in real has got to hear these songs.” – to her own private jet while I was flying Virgin
life… I was so nervous before we recorded Did you stay friends after Idol? Yes. We – but the security people suggested we drive
this that backstage I had to have a couple of got on from day one. We were thrown together along behind as part of the detail.
scotches and a cigarette! into that house and were very young – she was People watching on the sidewalk
A cigarette?! We all have a vice. It could be just 16. I was so happy to be standing next to would’ve gone, “Oh look, there goes
something worse. the Queen… and there goes Anthony
Callea!” I suppose so! It was very, very strange.
Speaking of royalty, has George Michael
“Kathy Griffin turned her back heard the new album? Not yet but I’ll be
sending him a copy. If it goes well he’ll make
on us and said, ‘Well, those a shit load of money! I’ve never been lucky
enough to meet him.
gays are a waste of space!”” Is it possible for you to choose just one
song as a favourite? One More Try. It wasn’t
my favourite going in. At rehearsals I wasn’t
getting it right. I was thinking, “I can’t do this!”
But when I sang it that night it clicked. I nailed
You were born in 1982, so was George it. I work better under pressure.
Michael part of the soundtrack of your Have you met any alterna-divas? Kathy
life from early on? Yes, and what I didn’t her on the stage at the Opera House [for the Griffin. She was performing in Sydney and
realise until we started working on this was how Idol finals]. It didn’t matter to me who won at Tim and I knew the promoter so we phoned
much of the music he wrote himself. It’s a very that point. I love her to death. up and asked if we could meet her backstage
powerful thing when you discover the story Idol launched your career (and that of – which we did. And she said, “Where’s the best
behind songs like Father Figure or Jesus To A Casey, Guy Sebastian, Ricki-Lee and place to go out in this city?” And we had to say,
Child. I never intended recording these songs others). Do you think reality talent shows well, we’re from Melbourne and we don’t know
or doing this tour. I just got my band together today seem more about making TV than Sydney, and we prefer a quiet champagne bar
and said, “I love these songs, let’s do them” and helping performers into lasting careers? anyway… And Kathy turned her back on us and
suddenly the show was sold out. So the record There’s good and bad. The shows are amazing said, “Well, those gays are a waste of space!”
company got involved and we decided to film it now – pyrotechnics, backing dancers, Will Tim be joining you on the tour?
and record it and here we are touring it. choreography. For us, Idol was raw and real. No. He has his own tour dates and he’ll be in
Is there a risk taking on the George It was all about the voice. We weren’t even Vietnam.
Michael songbook? Totally. And I did put allowed to have an instrument on stage. The Who will join you to duet on Faith and
some pressure on myself because there are culture has changed – now it’s more about the Somebody To Love? I was thinking of calling
expectations. I kept saying, “Don’t fuck this judges than the performers. And when the out to some of my favourite singers in each city.
up!” But also, I never took the approach of show ends, that’s the hardest part because you I am available. Good. We're looking for an
emulating his style. I didn’t want it to be a have to go out and make a living. interpretive dancer. We’ll put you in a body
tribute because that sounds like he’s dead. It’s Celine, Whitney, Mariah, Diana Ross stocking!
always been a celebration. – you’ve worked with some serious divas! Do you like performing live? You know,
You end the show with a Wham! song. They’re all very different; what do they there’s a lot of bullshit in the entertainment
Have you and Tim [Campbell, his partner] have in common? Massive hits! If it’s about industry and sometimes it gets to you, but
considered doing a Wham! act? Ha! No, massive tits, Mariah wins, no argument! when you walk out on stage and get to the
but that’s a good idea! They are all very different but my favourite microphone it feels right and you’re reminded
There might be fights about who’s was Celine. She was the most beautiful and that this is what it’s all about.
George and who’s Andrew. I’m so George. gracious. I was so nervous walking into that
Besides, I’m the woggy one. situation because, love or hate her voice,
Have you ever put shuttlecocks down technically she’s perfect. But she made the MORE: Ladies And Gentlemen, The Songs Of
your tennis shorts? God, no. Why? effort to come and see me backstage and George Michael is out now. Go to anthonycallea.
com. for tour date. Look for Anthony on Twitter,
Wham! did that for a photoshoot once. I introduce herself. At the end of the tour she Facebook and Instagram.
DNA 23
/ SAMPLES
O
DE Pentatonix (left to right): Avi Kaplan, Mitch Grassi,
VI Scott Hoying, Kirstie Maldonado, Kevin Olusola.
PITCH PERFECT
You all wore a lot of make-up for your
Daft Punk video – were you channeling
Boy George or David Bowie? Both! We
love playing with our looks in videos. Some
of our viewers thought it was too outlandish,
but I obviously had a great time dressing up
in costume.
When is too much eyeliner too much?
›› Vocal super group Pentatonix is bringing a cappella to When you look like you got punched really
hard in both eyes.
the fore of the music industry. But please, don't call them Who are some of your celebrity fans?
a novelty act says Marc Andrews after chatting to band Maisie Williams who plays Arya in Game Of
Thrones – she’s such a doll and a big fan of
member, Mitch Grassi. Scott and my vlog channel, Superfruit. Jesse
Tyler Ferguson from Modern Family and his
husband Justin Mikita are fans, too. They’re
DNA: Give us a quick history of Pentatonix. How do you decide on your covers? also good friends of ours.
Mitch Grassi: We started out as a nameless Usually we like to pick songs that are getting Where would you like to be in five years?
trio – Kirstie, Scott, and I – in high school lots of recognition and have good musicality. I would like to have a few hit songs under
performing around campus. When Scott went We try to stay away from trudging through our belt. I’d also like to have written a good
off to college he met Ben, one of our current arranging a song simply because it’s a top 40 number of songs on my own. I think pursuing
producers, who suggested we audition for hit. Alternatively, if one of us is inspired by our own individual endeavors more in the
NBC’s The Sing-Off. He recommended we add a particular song, popular or underground, coming years would be great.
a bass and a beatboxer to fill out our sound. we’ll pitch it to the group. You’re described in your press as a “vocal
Ben had known Avi, then we found Kevin on What can we expect from [their upcoming super group”. Your thoughts? I love that.
YouTube because of a viral video of his. We film] Pitch Perfect 2? It’s gonna be a great I don’t mind being dubbed a cappella since
competed on the show and ended up winning movie. We make a small little cameo and I technically that is what we are, but I think,
season three. can’t say much about it but we are a competing to some listeners, that word has a negative
How did winning The Sing-Off change group against the Bellas [smiles]. connotation. We can be easily mislabeled as
your lives? In so many ways. One of the Who are your musical inspirations? One “cheesy” or “novelty”.
biggest and most drastic was that we all moved of my biggest is Imogen Heap. Not only does
out to Los Angeles to get started on our career she have a stunningly beautiful voice, she’s More: Visit www.ptxofficial.com or like Pentatonix
as an actual band. The show was an important also incredibly intelligent and inventive. She on Facebook.
stepping stone in the band’s current success.
Have you given up your day jobs? Yes, but
I didn’t have one to begin with [laughs].
The band has a very distinctive look.
“I don’t mind being dubbed a cappella since
Discuss. The most important thing for us is
that we stay true to ourselves. We each have
technically that is what we are, but I think, to some
our own personal “brand” I suppose. That’s
something I really like about us. We love to listeners, that word has a negative connotation.”
push individuality and it’s fun for the fans to
get to know us individually.
24 DNA
/ SAMPLES
No bears were
harmed during
the filming of
Where The
Bears Are,
season three.
O
DE
VI
›› A killer is picking off top online honours, winning best gay comedy
webseries from sites AfterElton and Queerty.
the bears… and he’s taking The new season arrives courtesy of popular
out the exhibitionists first. demand. After paying for the first season
out of pocket and the second from DVD
Welcome to the third and merchandise sales, this time around
hunting season of Where the filmmakers (Rick Copp, Joe Dietl and
Ben Zook; also the series’ stars), banked on
The Bears Are. the show’s popularity and took to the crowd
funding site Kickstarter. Asking $150,000 to
cover costs, the team offered innovative perks
IN THE HIT COMEDY webseries, Where The that included IMDB producer credits, walk-on
Bears Are, hirsute heavies Reggie, Wood and roles, meet and greets, paintings, dinners and
Nelson are roommates who double as murder even acting lessons to would-be backers. The
mystery-solving sleuths. In the newly released pitch paid off and they exceeded their goal in
season three, the whodunit involves the serial March, raising an impressive $159,000.
killings of Chunk Studio porn models. That Imagine Murder, She Wrote filmed on
steamy Jacuzzi scene had a little too much location at the Folsome Street Fair! Things get
electricity! hairy for the burly boys this season, but not to
As the body count rises, the crew goes worry – no bears were harmed during filming
undercover to infiltrate the industry… but can of the 22 episode romp. Opening in LA’s Silver
they perform? “You call that making love? I call Lake and climaxing on a jumbo jet, look
it the rape scene from Deliverance!” declares for cameos along the way from gay favs Tuc
Wood – and fans are squealing like a pig, Watkins, Drew Droege and Sam Pancake.
with over nine million views since it debuted
in 2012. Where The Bears Are has also taken More: Wherethebearsare.TV
26 DNA
Belvedere is a quality choice. Drinking responsibly is too.
TASCHEN
28 DNA
Brothers
In Arms
To alleviate the horrors of
war, allied commanders
encouraged servicemen to
form tight buddy bonds,
and, when not in combat,
they engaged in naked
horseplay as pictured
in My Buddy: World
War 2 Laid Bare.
“[Editor] Hanson marvels at the unique bond (and profound intimacy) that cut through the
inhibitions of men who faced death together… and as the glue residue and gummy taped
MICHAEL STOKES COLLECTION/TASCHEN
on the verso of the original photos attests, the relics were not hidden but treasured and
held pride of place in photo albums for decades.” — National Post, Canada
More: My Buddy: World War 2 Laid Bare is available at the Bookshop Darlinghurst, at booksellers worldwide and via Taschen.com.
DNA 29
Music
Compiled by Marc Andrews
5 SECONDS OF SUMMER –
5 SECONDS OF SUMMER
The last time an Australian boy band
made it big internationally was – well
–there really hasn’t been one. Cleverly
designated as the meeting place between
post-punk rock and boy band pop,
5SOS champion big, chunky choruses
with sing-along bits that manage to
lodge in your brain and refuse to leave.
It’s a simple formula but it’s worked
for many of the previous decades so
there’s little reason to wonder why these
four Aussie spunks have become chart
favourites around the globe. Still, they
strain so hard to
be heterosexual
O
DE (She Looks So
VI
Perfect they
Perfect)
make One
Direction seem
like circuit
queens on a break
from a porn shoot.
Cute, but as we
5 Seconds Of Summer:
all know, cute can
world domination, here get tiresome very
we come! quickly.
30 DNA
Official
Spray Tan
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DNA 31
Books
Compiled by Graeme Aitken
32 DNA
NEW
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bam-thank-you-man rulebook out the window Cocky Boy fans love the “non-porn”
and recreated the porn paradigm. Radically, models and, as a magazine that values quality
the models appear genuinely attracted to each photography, the DNA team love that someone
THE DIGITAL AGE HAS made porn more other (you can’t hear the ker-ching! of the pay who knows about lighting is on set.
accessible then ever before and, it could be cheque with the money shot). They kiss with A Thing Of Beauty is a hardback of stills by
argued, cheaper, nastier, less meaningful and real passion. They say things like, “I love you,” RJ Sebastian for Cocky Boys studio (published
less satisfying into the bargain. One porn rather than the usual trash talk we’re used to in by Bruno Gmunder). It takes porn to a new
production company bucking that trend is New gay porn. The films even have coherent plots – level of creative and technical sophistication.
York’s Cocky Boys. although that’s not as important as hot sex, and Is it still porn? Absolutely. Is it beautiful? It’s
They’ve thrown porn’s formulaic wham- there’s plenty of that. that, too.
A Thing
Of Beauty
34 DNA
DNA 35
STYLE /with Matt Young
Actor Walter
Best
Delmar gets it
›› It’s true, fellas… the right. The shoe
completes the
right shoe with the right look, rather
Foot
(Photography
by James Loy.
man. Paul LaRosa, head Clothes by
zakbrand.com.)
honcho at Croft Shoes, tells
us how it’s done.
36 DNA
/ SAMPLES
#JUST SAYING /by Phillip Portman
Scenes from a bromance:
Zach Rance (left, straight)
and Frankie Grande (blond,
gay) put the cat among
the pigeons of relationship
convention.
Frankly
juggernaut were waiting for except… Zach says
he’s straight.
“I am not gay, but the bond that Frankie and
Zrankie,
I have is so genuine and sincere that I truly feel
like he is my boyfriend,” he announced while
in the house. “I like gay people. I’m straight and whomever we want without fear of being labelled
I only date women but Frankie is just one of the outright and forced to commit into a linear life
Do We Give
greatest people I’ve ever met.” path.” Others readers shared experiences from
Their bromance caused confusion among other their own straight/gay friendships.
contestants and divided fans of the show. Was it It’s clear that we do live in a world where
possible for a gay guy and a straight guy to have people blur the lines of sexual identity.
A Damn?
such an intimate, non-sexual bond? Was Zach Hollywood leading man James Franco is
hiding his true sexuality? Was their relationship possibly the gayest straight guy around, often
having a negative impact on the gay community locking lips with other men, sharing beds with
by sending mixed messages about what other guys, dressing in drag and portraying
constitutes a gay person and gay relationships? gay characters in film. He’s stated on numerous
›› The last season of Big We asked our online audience what they occasions that it would easier if he was gay, but
made of Zrankie and whether they had ever he’s simply not. Then there’s Hunger Games
Brother prompted an been besties with a straight guy. Many believed hottie Josh Hutcherson, who last year revealed
intriguing question: can a the touchy-feely relationship crossed a line that he’s straight but could one day meet a guy he’s
automatically meant that Zach was, in fact, gay.
gay relationship exist when “What these two are doing is totally gay,” one
attracted to. Where do we draw the line on
what makes someone gay and what constitutes
one partner is straight? reader posted. a gay relationship? Is it an emotional
“Ladies and gentlemen, this is what you call
DNA’s online community a closet case. It’s one thing to have a straight
connection? Is it physical contact?
Perhaps the truth is that there isn’t a
had plenty to say… friend, but the cuddling and ass dancing… no,” definitive answer, and it’s not up to us to draw
asserted another. these intangible lines. Although it may appear
“The only relationships I’ve witnessed or that others are unravelling the identify our
Earlier this year, Frankie Grande (the older been part of like this usually require blowjobs,” community has worked so hard to define, we
brother of Nickelodeon pop star Ariana Grande) quipped another. can’t dismiss something as being fake simply
and Zach Rance struck up a relationship inside But some disagreed, citing how much times because we don’t understand it. Is it strange
the American Big Brother house. The pair were had changed and that sexual identity is now that straight guys want to cuddle and hug us?
inseparable. They snuggled, spooned and stayed more fluid. Maybe. Would I rather spoon a straight guy
up all night chatting and created special dance “I love that a straight man can be so than have him be freaked out by my sexuality?
moves that involved lots of grinding and body comfortable with his own sexuality that he can You bet.
contact. They shared the same bed, declared show affection to another man whether gay or
their love for each other and, taking a leaf from straight,” one fan suggested. Join the conversation:
celebrity power couples such as Brangelina and Another, broadminded, reader agreed: “It’s
Kimye, nicknamed themselves “Zrankie”. This beautiful to think we are entering an age
seemed like the gay fairytale fans of the reality where we can ask for whatever we need from
38 DNA
/ SAMPLES
NUTTIER THAN A SQUIRREL TURD #3
Here’s what the haters have been saying…
DNA 39
/ STRAIGHT MATE
40 DNA
O
DE
VI
DNA 41
COMMON MORTALS /with Christopher Klimovski
Fright Night,
Big City Would you let this
sleazy perve take
your photo? Our
Christopher as Terry
Richardson for his
first Halloween.
42 DNA
debate, I snapped away while they let out a
›› Halloween is a massive party night for Americans, drunken celebratory scream of rebellion and I
so for an Aussie trick-or-treat virgin in New York it’s all realised this costume was my golden ticket to
one of the most debaucherous nights of my life
about the right outfit. But a "wrong" outfit worked fine! and a licence to document as I pleased.
Once kitten-Joey finished his set, we went
to an apartment party in Dumbo. I was told
LIKE EVERY YOUNG Australian boy, I my facial hair into mutton chops and a this is where the true light of Halloween shines
have been dreaming of my first American handle-bar moustache. I threw on the clothes because, in the safety of an apartment, people
Halloween since watching The Simpsons and caught the L-Train to Graham Avenue truly let loose and this was something Terry’s
Treehouse Of Horror episodes. So as October where I was to meet Joey and his friends at camera needed to see.
grew closer, my little Aussie legs began to Nik Blumenthal’s place. Snapping Peter Pan and Where’s Wally
dance the dance of excitement. Nik opened the door and I knew my making out while slurping Jell-O shots, I
Under the sheer weight of this anticipation, costume had paid off as he yelled, “Oh, no noticed my pocket was full of Polaroid shots
my mind refused to keep up. In the months way! Terry Richardson!” and my camera empty. This didn’t stop me
leading to this auspicious occasion, I began to I was thrilled it had come together so continuing to take photos as the level of
brainstorm. I don’t mean sporadic ideas here perfectly. In Nik’s room, Joey and Matt were inebriation reached a point where people
and there. I liken the level of brainstorming twerking to one of Joey’s latest mixes. Nik and stopped noticing their picture produced no
to a boardroom at Apple as they invent a Joey were dressed as kittens, Matt, a veteran physical photo.
revolutionary new piece of technology. The badass, was so over Halloween that he refused
pressure was on! This would forever be my to dress up but after some pressure he agreed
first Halloween costume, to be remembered for
the rest of my life – with pictures.
to come out anyway. Joey was going to DJ a
Halloween party in the Lower East Side at “President Obama and Bill
Under this mound of pressure, I also engaged
anyone who would listen. “What are you going
1am, which gave us time to drink and smoke
ourselves into a frenzy. Clinton were working the
as this year?” I would enquire, to which I
received responses along the lines of, “It’s three
My great idea of going as Terry seemed
ill-conceived when I stepped back outside guest list. Wonder Woman
months away man, can you calm down?”
But I couldn’t. Everything had to be perfect.
Everything had to flow. Everything had to go
at midnight. The autumn chill was strong
but luckily I had drunk myself to the point
of acquiring my trusted booze blanket. We
stamped our wrists and
just right! [Wipes manic saliva from mouth.]
I began tossing around a few suggestions to
waited for the L train to roll in and I looked
around, hazy-eyed, at the slew of monkeys,
Willy Wonka was finishing
gage the reactions. Lukewarm responses would
immediately throw the costume idea into the
slutty nuns and Barbie and Kens littering the
platform. It was as though the entire city had
up his DJ set.”
mental trash. When costumes became too raided a costume shop and nobody (except
elaborate, prices reaching into the hundreds, Matt) was exempt from dressing up. We rode
I grounded myself because who the fuck was the train to Union Square where we changed A drunken vampire actually stood there
I kidding, considering buying a jetpack for a lines. A sumo wrestling couple were in a insisting that I show her the photo I took
“really cool entrance”? heated argument while a fairy practiced her of her while I attempted to explain, for the
As with all my assignments throughout ballet moves and her boyfriend, a burrito, was better part of twenty minutes, that on top of
tertiary education, my best friend, making sure his salsa remained in his taco- it not being digital, there was no film in the
procrastination, took me on a long-winded shell body suit. camera. She made a comment about how I
journey to nowhere. On Halloween day, I At the party’s entrance, President Obama and didn’t even really look like a lumberjack and
was without a costume. Frantic, I decided to former president Bill Clinton were working the decided to catch a cab back to her coffin.
visit an Op-Shop in East Williamsburg, toss guest list. Wonder Woman stamped the back I bid the party farewell and sat on the J train
together an odd fitting outfit and come up of our wrists and we walked up to the DJ booth back home. Removing the Polaroids, I began
with an elaborate backstory for myself. where Willy Wonka was finishing his set. I looking through them. More nipples, arse
I rifled through odds and ends, sipped a drink that was mixed by Mario while and abs photos than you could shake a stick
disappointed in myself. This would be Luigi was on break and looked out onto the sea at. A clown giving an angel simulated oral
another year without a costume and mediocre of costumed New Yorkers. sex. Borat vomiting. Adam and Eve drinking
Halloween plans. Disenchanted, I picked up A drink blended into drink(s) and everyone apple cider. I thought to myself that this
a red plaid shirt, walked to the communal became slightly more dishevelled. The beauty wasn’t the most conventional first celebration
change mirror and held it up. Behind me, of my costume was that everybody wanted his of Halloween, but I was fucking glad for the
over my right shoulder, I saw a Polaroid or her picture taken by the notorious Terry experience. Intoxication certainly made the
camera and like a bolt of lightning it hit me. Richardson. I ducked outside for a cigarette experience far more vivid.
I rushed to the denim rack and picked up where Elvis asked me for a light. I smoked As I stumbled home, a homeless man asked
a loose-fitting pair of light blue Levi 501s, and surveyed the streets, polluted with for spare change in a festive manner. “Trick or
navy T-shirt, a crappy brown belt and threw combinations of characters interacting like you treat?” he said, palm outstretched. I didn’t have
it all onto the counter. “I’ll take the Polaroid would never imagine. When you see a zombie a single dollar on me that I could find, so I gave
camera too,” I told the cashier. making out with Marge Simpson, you’ve pretty him a photo of Pocahontas getting her tits out
I raced home with newfound energy, much seen it all. and replied, “Treat.”
hoping that it would all come together in a Slutty schoolgirls asked if I would take
Cinderella-at-midnight rush. I showered, their picture. “Only if you get your tits out
styled my hair with Layrite wax and shaved for Terry,” I said. When they did so without More: Find the author on Twitter @KhrisWarhol.
DNA 43
ADVICE /with Robbyne Kaamil
Dear Diva…
of the world! If he visits or I visit him, I
fear it will only make things worse. What
do I do?
You were right to let your ex follow his dream.
If you had given him an ultimatum and forced
him to stay in Australia he would have ended
up becoming resentful towards you and filled
with regret. You may have to step out of your
Lost that loving feeling to a friend who keeps you comfort zone and hop on a plane. If you have
hanging on but left you overseas? Never fear, advice found Mr Right, don’t let him slip through
your fingers. He is not messing with your head
diva Robbyne Kaamil is here. when he says you’re destined to be together.
He’s speaking from the heart. You should listen
to a song recorded by Gladys Knight, Midnight
MY LIFE IS A WHITNEY SONG gone and probably will ever go. I feel Train To Georgia. It’s about a woman’s
Dear Diva, how will I know if my man like sometimes he takes advantage relationship with her man she met while he
really loves me? of knowing I’m in love with him, but is pursuing his dreams in the entertainment
When someone loves you they lift you up. They recently he got a boyfriend and is being industry. When his dreams don’t come true,
love you for who you are and not who they cagey about it, and I’m not sure if it’s he moves back home to a small rural city and
want you to be, and they want you to be happy. to keep me around or to protect my she moves there to be with him. One of the
Actions speak louder than words, but you have feelings. I’m caught between wanting to verses is, “I’d rather live in his world, than live
to be willing to listen. If your man tells you that know more... and feeling very envious. without him in mine”. Go get your man!
he loves you but he beats your ass, steals your I can’t help myself! “Taking a break”
money, screws your best friend, eats your food seems so dramatic. What should I do? PARTY BOY PARTNER
and has never bought you a slice of bread – he Your so-called “friend” doesn’t care about Dear Diva, my boyfriend and I met in our
doesn’t love you. your feelings. You are merely a piece of tail to early twenties and are now in our early
him. He is taking advantage of you and your thirties. In that time, I’ve become more
CAUGHT IN CONSERVATIVE feelings. Real friends don’t use each other. of a homebody and like to stay in, watch
CROSSFIRE For future reference, please understand that a movie and snuggle, but he still wants
Dear Diva, my boyfriend comes from a just because someone is your drinking buddy to go out all the time. He calls me an old
conservative religious family. He has just doesn’t make them your friend. You don’t need lady, and I know we live in NYC but – will
come out to his parents (who are still in to torture yourself with all the details about his FOMO ever end?
denial) but he still won’t be seen with his new relationship. I usually don’t like drama Just because you are in a relationship doesn’t
me on social media, and of course I’ve but I’m telling you to be dramatic and drop his mean you have to be clones. You are still
never met them. I understand all that sorry ass today! individuals and it is fine if you have different
and try to be patient, but now we are
talking about moving in together and
he is putting me off with excuses like he
needs more space, but I know it’s just his
“He is not messing with
disapproving family – he is still keeping
his public image wiped of anything gay.
your head when he
What should I do?
Everyone has to come out in their own way and says you’re destined
in their own time. It is a very strong person
who can live their life without needing the to be together… go get
approval of family, peers or friends. That type
of strength is very rare. The one thing that can
give us the strength to overcome family drama,
your man!”
pain or fear is love. However, it appears your
boyfriend’s fear of his family and their opinion interests. He always comes home to you. That’s
is stronger than his love for you. You deserve to LONG-DISTANCE DRAMA what matters most. Sometimes you should
be loved openly and publicly and you shouldn’t Dear Diva, my ex is the love of my life. hang out with him for a night on the town.
have to settle for being someone’s little secret. It We broke up because he had dreams Love is a give and take. Be flexible and he
may take your boyfriend years before he is able of being an actor and moved to LA. will likely return the favor and spend more
to stand up and come out to his family without That wasn’t for me, but I wanted him evenings at home snuggling with you.
looking back. He may never do it. Don’t allow to pursue his dreams. It’s now been
anyone to waste your time. You can never get it over a year and he still sends texts and More: Robbyne Kaamil is an actress and
back once it’s gone. calls and I feel like I can’t move on, and comedian who has matched wits with Howard
Stern and can be seen regularly on Here TV.
it’s the same for him. It’s like we’re A popular advice diva, she believes “when a
FRIEND WITH NO LONG-TERM each other’s security blankets. It’s hard motherfucker hates you for telling the truth,
BENEFITS to date new guys because he messes he will respect you for doing it.” Find her on
Dear Diva, I’m in love with my friend. with my head saying he’ll come back Facebook and email your Dear Diva questions:
Sometimes when we get drunk we fool to Australia, that we’re destined to be [email protected]. Follow her on
Twitter @TheAdviceDiva.
around but that’s as far as it’s ever together, etc, but he’s on the other side
44 DNA
OPINON /with Verushka Darling
DNA 45
/ FEATURE
WE WERE ON A DIRT road in the cotton
Was I A Teenaged
fields, sitting in the back of his Plymouth.
It had been my idea to stop and look at the sky,
but it wasn’t coming off like a sneaky move
now because the moon was full and bright and
Sexual Predator?
gorgeous. I’d been playing along, but I wished
he would make his move. This was the part
that was always kind of boring. He was nice,
though, and good-looking, maybe around 35.
It’s a balmy Louisiana night in 1975, and I’m 14
As an adolescent, Mark S King had no qualms about years old. Everything went as planned, and he got
me home on time so no one suspected anything.
pursuing men for sex. Forty years later, he questions if But he was a lot more nervous about it than I was.
the line between victim and perpetrator can ever blur. And that was the routine during my teenage
years. I had given up trying to mess around with
other boys, because it took forever to talk them
into anything, and I didn’t want them to freak
out about it. So I got involved in community
Photo illustration courtesy of theater during the summer, playing bit parts or
ethanjamesphotography.com working the spotlight, just to be in the company
of gay men. Then it was just a matter of getting
time alone with them. My strategy for getting
laid worked with some regularity, and it never
occurred to me that there might be something
inappropriate or perverse or even criminal about
it – at least, it never occurred to me.
46 DNA
People tell me that the criminal ramifications Afterwards, I happily got back in the car but out the window. He was still very upset.
most certainly occur to them. They say I was Jim wasn’t talking much. He had become really He wasn’t simply crying out of guilt, they tell
molested or abused, and that it was the very quiet as soon as we were done. We had driven a me now. They insist that he was deflecting his
definition of the word statutory. They say I was few blocks when Jim let out a kind of cough, like own criminal behavior by blaming me for not
dealing with adults who had the capacity to know he was trying to stifle something and it burst out acting my age. They tell me that he was the one
better. And, most bruising to my ego, they tell me anyway. I looked over, and his whole face was wet. who had trapped me and I didn’t even know it.
that my seductive charms were irrelevant, and “What’s wrong?” I asked. I had seen men in Whatever the case, Jim got more than he
that perhaps it was the adults who were doing the some personal situations, but I had never seen bargained for. I think he was a little frightened by
manipulating. one cry. the manipulative and unemotional 15-year-old
Now, 40 years later, I wonder if my teenage He pulled the car over and turned it off. sitting in his car that afternoon. And I think it
memories are trustworthy, and if it set the Suddenly, everything felt quiet and important. saddened him because he cared about me.
stage for an adulthood in ways I’ve failed to “What is it?” I asked in a careful voice. “Am I And yes, I felt trapped, all right, if only because
acknowledge. Before I became a man, before the in trouble?” He was searching the car console for I felt trapped in his car in this moment, where
failed relationships and the sexual compulsions something and found a packet of Kleenex. He things were not going as I’d planned, because
and the drug addiction, there was an adolescent held it in his lap and started to speak while he after ten minutes we were still parked on the
who travelled side roads with strangers and took opened it. “I’m twice your age, Mark,” he said into side of the road, and Jim wouldn’t stop crying. I
dangerous walks in public parks. And it is that his lap. His eyes were little cups of water, spilling. was staring at my shoelaces, because I couldn’t
boy, not the legion of adults I encountered, who He turned to me. “You’re 15 years old. I’m twice imagine that a grown guy would want anyone
fascinates and saddens me. Was my fate sealed in your age. Twice.” to see him like this. He must have been so
the cotton fields of Louisiana? His mathematics meant nothing to me. His embarrassed. And I wished he would start the
The men I coaxed to those dusty roads aren’t expression toward me, though, sad and quizzical, car, because the party was going on, and there
villainous to me, and I still can’t allow them to be felt like he was trying to read my mind. It made were probably lots of people having fun around
left dangling in guilt and shame. I won’t reduce me uncomfortable. I didn’t know what he wanted. the pool, and I really wanted to be there.
them to simple pathology. I sat there and said nothing. I finally looked over at him, and he was blowing
I met Jim in August, right before my freshman He turned away and gulped back more tears. his nose. Maybe that means we’ll get moving
year in high school. The summer musical was And then he asked the most mysterious question again, I was thinking. Jim didn’t say anything
1776, and I was a stagehand. It was practically an of all. “Don’t you… just want to be 15, Mark?” else, but he did finally turn the ignition and the
all-male cast, so it was a busy summer. After a I had no idea what the man was talking about. car rumbled to a start. I was so relieved. I really
matinée performance one afternoon, I asked Jim I sat staring at him with my mouth open. I was wanted to see what was happening at the party.
for a ride to a pool party someone was throwing completely stumped. Seconds went by, and the
for the cast and crew. Once inside his car, I told car was silent. More: Visit author Mark S King’s popular blog,
him I’d forgotten my bathing suit and asked if we My confusion seemed to disappoint him, www.myfabulousdisease.com, which chronicles his
life as an HIV-positive gay man in recovery.
could stop at his place so that I could borrow one. because he shook his head slowly and looked back
What followed was a pitiful half-naked fashion
show in his bedroom and a brief, awkward
encounter between us. WHAT DO YOU THINK? be protected from sexual minors the law should be strictly
The law would make Mark the predators and abuse but do we adhered to? We’d love to hear
victim in this account, yet in need to acknowledge that some your thoughts. Send them to
hindsight he sees himself as the people arrive at their sexual [email protected]
perpetrator. Is there a victim identity earlier than others?
in this story? Children should Or, is it that in order to protect
DNA 47
/ FASHION
Super
Crazy
Funtimes!
Luke wears Teamm8 briefs.
PHOTOGRAPHY AND STYLING
FLASH AVENUE STUDIO
(FLASHAVENUESTUDIOS.COM)
48 DNA
Lewis wears Tribe Australia
swimwear and beach towel.
DNA 49
/ FASHION
50 DNA
William and Lewis wear BWET swimwear.
DNA 51
/ FASHION
52 DNA
Jase wears Stardom
Underwear.
DNA 53
/ FASHION
54 DNA
Myles wears Stardom Underwear.
DNA 55
/ FASHION
56 DNA
William and Lewis wear Teamm8 underwear.
DNA 57
/ FASHION
58 DNA
Models wear Teamm8, Tribe Australia,
Stardom Underwear, CIN-2, BWET and
Manus Swimwear.
DNA 59
/ AFRICA
EXIST IN
it’s going to stick? Should we start
celebrating yet?
Dr Paul Semugoma: This law was struck
down by the Constitutional Court on the
grounds that parliament didn’t follow
AFRICA!”
procedure with respect to quorum. I was one
of the petitioners and the law was struck down
completely, which was pretty amazing because
we thought that maybe part of the law would
be struck down and this would take years to
Uganda’s anti-gay law may be down but is it happen. In this case, it was totally struck down
and this happened in the first six months since
entirely out? Don’t pop any corks just yet, warns the launch of the case. It’s pretty amazing.
one activist. Will it stick? I don’t know. As we speak,
(August) members of parliament have started
gathering signatures to have the law reinstated
which, of course, can be done because this law
UGANDA’S ANTI-HOMOSEXUALITY ACT attracted world-wide was only struck down on procedural grounds.
They can try to reinstate it using the correct
condemnation. Politicians and activists prepared for a long campaign to procedures. If they do that, it’ll be back.
see it repealed. So when Uganda’s Constitutional Court struck down the Does this mean we’re at risk of going
legislation earlier this year, imagine the surprise and joy that followed. back to square one? Yes. However, on the
positive side is the fact that it was struck down
Since 2009, when this shocking law was first proposed, many people so fast. This could have been because of the
have lived in fear and hiding. Some found the courage to stay and fight, international pressure; some countries getting
while others were forced into self-imposed exile to carry on the struggle out and protesting. This could encourage the
president not to go ahead with it.
from outside countries. Dr Paul Semugoma left Uganda a few years ago, Is there the risk of “mob justice” from
after he came out. He and his partner live in Cape Town, South Africa. the communities around the country
Frank Malaba caught up with him for DNA to discuss the implications who’ve had their minds poisoned by the
law? That is a pretty big risk in Uganda. At
of Uganda’s overturned anti-gay laws. the moment homophobia is preached by most
churches and the politicians are also on the
bandwagon. The risk of mob justice and violence
is there for anybody who identifies as gay. These
people would have to be very careful. There are
just a few out people who talk about being gay.
Most people are closeted and terrified to come
out and it is understandable.
Before all this, were people living freely
as LGBTI people in Uganda? Of course
not! They were really closeted. It was about
being closeted at home, at work and in one’s
social life. It was almost like being a secret
agent – you had a few friends who knew you
were gay because they were also gay. This was
total and complete closeting.
Is that how you lived in Uganda? Yes. That
is how I lived! That is how everybody lives.
Does your family back in Uganda accept
you as a gay man? They don’t accept me as a
gay man who is out. My parents and I have not
had a fallout on the issue [of being gay], but they
have expressed their displeasure at the fact that
I am talking about being gay and am part of the
face of gay rights in Uganda. That rubs off on
them and they are not so happy about that.
Are you worried that they could be in
danger? The law required that those with
gay family members had to report them
60 DNA
or be arrested of fined themselves. I don’t out. To do so, I ended the relationship with my but somehow human beings are resilient and
think that they personally would be in danger partner and got out of the country. gay people have learned to live with the fear of
because the stigma is personally towards me. A few years ago, Zimbabwean president, discrimination. The risks of being found out,
Granted, it kind of rubs off [on them]. They are Robert Mugabe said that gay people did beaten up or facing violence are very real. The
probably under a cloud socially because their son not exist in his country therefore how unfortunate thing is that getting out of the
is gay and talks about it but I really don’t think could people that don’t exist get HIV country certainly is not a practical solution for
they would be in danger. Sometimes it is about treatment? Do you think African leaders everybody. I beg them to hang in there.
weighing pros and cons and realising that if you refute the existence of gay people as Have you been back to Uganda in the
keep quiet it also does not help. a tactic to avoid facing up to the HIV three years since you left? No. I haven’t.
Because that would mean that you problem? It’s a big denial and it’s all over the As a gay Ugandan who proclaims that I am gay
would not exist? Exactly. In order to exist you continent. In Liberia they had a conference and a person of some prominence I would not be
conform. You have to conform to a life which is where someone brought up the issue of MSM very comfortable. This risk of violence is a matter
of fact whether officially sanctioned or not.
Another reason for this is that I have my family
here. I hope to go back because it is my home
Homophobia is preached by most churches country and I am not going to reject it but for the
time being I have not yet gone back.
and the politicians are also on the bandwagon. The Most of the people who will read this
risk of ‘mob justice’ and violence is there for anybody are in Australia, the USA and the UK.
What misconception do you suspect they
who identifies as gay. might have about Uganda and Africa
that you’d like to put right? I don’t think
Australians would believe that gay Africans don’t
exist (laughs). It’s a very strong misconception in
basically a lie. That is not something I could do. Africa, among Africans, that gay Africans don’t
Here in South Africa, you have a exist. Some misconceptions they might have
partner… Yes. We have two kids and we are would be that we want to get out of our countries.
planning, hopefully, to have some more. I’m That’s not true. Our parents, our relatives are
living a life that would’ve only been a dream all there. As a matter of fact, us staying in our
in Uganda. When I lived there, I lived with my countries helps us shape the dialogue. I chose
partner for ten years but it was a very closeted South Africa because it’s still on the continent.
relationship. It was just two guys living in the All we ask for is for conditions to be liveable. We
same house and anybody who’d caught wind of don’t want extra rights. Seeing that the solidarity
what was happening would not have believed of the LGBT community outside our countries is
it. The only thing was that I became an activist strong, people in Africa accuse us of being “gay
and became really active in the village and for money”. This is certainly not true. Nobody in
people thought that maybe I could’ve been. I their right mind would come out to be the pariah
never confirmed or denied this fact. Here in of society. We don’t want to leave our countries.
South Africa I’m proud of going out and saying The other thing is, solidarity works! I have seen it
that this is my partner and my family and “In South Africa I'm living a life that would’ve
in Uganda. The activism we did around the Anti-
showing them off. only been a dream in Uganda,” says Dr homosexuality Act… We couldn’t do it within
Tell me about the moment that caused Semugoma (left). the country. We did it outside the country. When
you to come out, and how that lead to that bill was first written in 2009 it had a lot
your activism. It all started very slowly. It [men who have sex with men] and a minister of things including a death penalty. It took the
wasn’t just one moment. When I did my training said, “That is not a problem here because they world to stand up and protest against it and show
we had lots of HIV cases. We didn’t have this don’t exist.” So people then talked about it Uganda that laws like this have no place in the
focus on HIV as being a problem among the existing and this brought him to the conclusion 21st Century. Activism works. Activism of the
gay community. My first boyfriend actually that homosexuality should be criminalised Australian LGBT people works. The world has
died of AIDS and, apparently, it was a suicide. further to get rid of the problem! In cases like become a global village.
That kind of thing was not so appreciated in this, the stigma then becomes something self- How can we assist those people who
our community. It wasn’t until I was faced by perpetuating. When there is denial that gay are currently activists within Uganda?
a patient who’d just been diagnosed as HIV- Africans exist and they prove that they do exist, Listen to their cause. Be guided by what they
positive that I started thinking that we had a they become subject to harsher laws. It is like tell you needs to be done. Sometimes, as
problem in the community. I took it upon myself being a stain on the fabric of society and society activists in other countries, we’re not sensitive
to do something. That’s when I realised that wants to wipe us away. That is not something enough to what activists in a particular country
actually educating doctors was a huge problem that rests very well with me as a human being are doing. We must remember that they are
because of the stigma, which was prevalent because I believe I have the same humanity as all putting their lives on the line. Sometimes
then. So I went through the ensuing years angry other Africans, or Ugandans for that matter. something as simple as having a photograph
that people would rather that gay people like What’s it like for gay people and same- put online can be very dangerous to somebody
me get HIV than get proper information about sex couples currently living in Uganda, out there, so be careful and ask questions
protecting themselves. There was even denial sticking it out with all these things such as, “Is it okay to take your photo?” This
from the Ugandan AIDS Commission and happening? They tend to be closeted. This is a is because sometimes that photo could lead to
the Minister Of Health that [gay people] even matter of survival for them. They cannot come death. The activists in Uganda are necessary
existed. It culminated that I decided to come out. They live under very difficult circumstances and we need to support them.
DNA 61
AFRICA
62 DNA
A Thorn In
fellow police officer who had been taunting him
as “Banana’s wife”. Dube was found guilty of
murder, but he pleaded in mitigation that he had
been repeatedly raped by former president Banana
The Flesh
in the 1980s. The accusation played to the already
taboo issue of homosexuality in Zimbabwe.
In this context, how could a young, gay,
Zimbabwean of my stature in society stand up
and proclaim that I was gay, proud and that
there was nothing wrong with being gay? It was
nearly impossible.
To many Africans, there’s no such thing as a gay I had two choices. The first was to live in shame
and hiding and never exist. This would mean
African. Writer, broadcaster and poet, Frank Malaba dating a woman and being unhappy the rest of
dares to disagree. PHOTOGRAPHY ISAIAH CALITZ my life. The second was to embrace a no-pretence
life to the best of my abilities in a public profession
like acting. It would require me to be honest to all
the people that I worked with and shared life with
I AM A GAY NDEBELE man born in Zimbabwe, thought of being forced to be with a woman for the and trusted. I chose the latter and I’m glad I did.
a country with one of the most homophobic purposes of procreation paralysed my very being. You see, in Zimbabwe the people who I loved
and racist presidents you’ll probably encounter I remedied these fears by focusing on my acting and cherished accepted me for who I was, and
in a lifetime. I knew that I was somewhat career, which had started taking off and was the I was able to find a breathing space in which to
different from my friends and family at a very only thing that seemed right about my existence grow as an individual, and a chance to find love
young age. Of course, I had no idea that it was at the time. I was very successful in my theatre where possible. I never stood out, and tried to
my sexual orientation that was different. work to the point where I had producers asking if confront issues I did not agree with. Sometimes
In sub-Saharan Africa, anything other than the I’d thought of getting into television. Performance our existence in outwardly homophobic
heterosexual norm is more than frowned upon. became a drug. It fuelled the false satisfaction countries does not come in the form of large
In many places, being gay, or even thought to be that came from playing heterosexual roles in a protests, but in the ability to know that there
gay, is punishable with a prison sentence. This country that I felt was not ready to accept me for are people within that space and time that
can range from four to nine years imprisonment, who I was. It became so easy – getting carried cherish us. My strength came from friends,
and easily explains why I never saw or heard any away by the attention and false security of a work colleagues and the man I dated for eight
positive gay role models growing up in Zimbabwe.
When I hit my teens and walked around the
streets of my city of birth, Bulawayo, I began
to notice other men looking longingly at me.
This sort of experience escalated as I got older
A presidential guard had shot dead a fellow
and eventually men approached me and asked police officer who had been taunting him as
me out on dates or approached me and asked
outright for sexual favours. Of course, I ran a ‘Banana’s wife’. The accusation played to the already
mile in the opposite direction. It affirmed the
fact that I, indeed, was gay and that this was to
taboo issue of homosexuality in Zimbabwe.
be a thorn in the flesh.
What frightened me most was the hatred
with which Zimbabe’s President, Robert happy future in a homophobic Zimbabwe. happy and fulfilling years. Yes, it was possible
Mugabe, spoke these words at his birthday The year 2000 brought a haunting reality: to find an oasis in a scorching desert of hatred.
celebration rally in 1995: a serious case of sodomy was brought to the One of my highlights in Zimbabwe was being
“It degrades human dignity. It’s unnatural, and Supreme Court in Zimbabwe. The accused able to find a group of brave and supportive
there is no question ever of allowing these people was none other than the first black president young men who also had embraced who they
to behave worse than dogs and pigs. If dogs and of Zimbabwe, Canaan Banana. He had been were in a country of state-endoresed homophobia.
pigs do not do it, why must human beings? We president from April 1980 to December 1987. I can safely say that although fear was injected
have our own culture, and we must re-dedicate Most Zimbabweans adored him for his into our hearts as young people, we also found
ourselves to our traditional values that make us role in brokering the Unity Accord of 1987, solace in knowing that there were others like us
human beings… What we are being persuaded to which had curbed the country’s Matabeleland who we were able to meet for coffee and go with
accept is sub-animal behaviour and we will never massacres in which Mr Mugabe’s army is to straight bars and nightclubs. I continue to
allow it here. If you see people parading themselves blamed by human rights groups for killing as encounter this spirit of survival among men of
as lesbians and gays, arrest them and hand them many as 50,000 civilians. Banana mediated all ages in various African countries that are still
over to the police.” the talks that ended the violence by merging under the yoke of the old British colonial laws
From this moment on I feared being revealed opposition leader Joshua Nkomo’s Zapu party that criminalised “sodomy”. This unfortunate
as gay, of embarrassing my family and of into Mugabe’s Zanu-PF. So we’re talking pattern of laws plagues most of Africa.
imprisonment. In the Ndebele culture, you carry about someone who’d played a gigantic role in Having moved to South Africa, which has
more than your family name. You carry the changing the course of history in an otherwise one of the strongest pro-gay constitutions in the
honour and dignity of your clan. One of the most segregated, violent and prejudiced society. world, I've found a lot more freedom. And I'm not
honourable things you can do for your family, This accusation had come about because a alone. There are thousands of men in this country
as a man, is to carry forward the bloodline. The presidential guard, Jefta Dube, had shot dead a who have a similar (or worse) story than mine.
DNA 63
AFRICA
THE
THEY’RE CALLED THE “Born Free” or
the “Mandela Generation”. They are the
South Africans who were born after the release MANDELA
GENERATION
of Nelson Mandela from prison in 1990, and
who grew up without the Apartheid system
that politically, socially and economically
separted black from white, and those regarded
as coloured South Africans. They make up 40
percent of the South African population and Free born, gay and happy. Profile by Frank Malaba.
are characterised by their sense of optimism,
creativity, entreprenurial spirit and progressive
attitudes. They are eligible to vote and will shape
the political and social future of South Africa.
PHOTOGRAPHY
Among their freedoms is the liberty to express
ISAIAH CALITZ
their sexual orientation without fear. Oyama
Mbunyuza is from the township of Gugulethu
outside Cape Town: “I realised that I was gay
while I was still in high school,” says Oyama. “My
family is very religious so they did not believe that
I was a homosexual.”
Oyama met his boyfriend in 2008 and they’ve
been together ever since. When the two moved
to Gugulethu, six years ago, people in the
neighbourhood did not know that they were a
gay couple. They slowly came out over time and
discovered it was not an issue, and they were not
treated differently by their neighbours. Oyama
admits that there was some initial shock at their
bravery at being open and comfortable with their
sexual orientation.
“I have heterosexual friends and they treat me
I have heterosexual
friends and they treat me
with a lot of respect.
64 DNA
Gay Friendly Africa
While many countries in Africa are, with good reason, moving in the right direction for this beautiful
African country.
considered no-go zones for LGBTI travellers, are You may have noticed the Camp Kuzuma,
there still safe and fabulous options? Botswana, promotion on the first couple of
pages of this issue. Adam Atkin, the Australian
Marketing And Sales executive of the resort
says, “Camp Kuzuma is extremely gay friendly
YES, IF YOU FOLLOW some rules and learn BOTSWANA and welcomes a lot of gay couples from around
a little about the customs and laws of the “I could not change the law because that would the world.” Adam, who is gay himself, says
countries you’re visiting you’ll have a great be unnecessarily stirring up a hornet’s nest. I Botswana is already accepting of same-sex
experience. Although there are restrictive laws was not willing to lose an election on behalf of couples. Adam also runs an orphanage in
in most African countries, same-gender loving the gays. The majority of our people are still the village of Kasane and says that many
people can have a fabulous time. Most Africans opposed [to homosexuality] so I must convince people in Chobe know he’s gay and that this
are warm and receptive people by nature and them first before changing the law unilaterally.” has not been an issue for him. If you’d like to
very welcoming, if conservative. Be guided by These were the words of former Botswana learn more about Camp Kuzuma go to www.
a professional company, consult a gay friendly President Festus Mogae when interviewed campkuzuma-bw.com
travel agent in your country or research online. by the BBC in 2011. Now, the government of
Here’s a few suggestions… Botswana has backed a call for the respect of MOZAMBIQUE
all human rights across the African continent, Same-sex activity is legal and there is a ban on
SOUTH AFRICA made by the African Commission On Human anti-gay discrimination.
This is the only country in Africa that And People’s Rights in June, 2014.
recognises all-encompassing LGBTI rights in While gay sex is technically illegal, LESOTHO
its constitution. Travel here is easy and public prosecutions are rare and, interestingly, it’s Same-sex activity has been legal since 2012.
displays of affection should not draw too much illegal to discriminate against gays. Recently,
attention in big cities and gay friendly resorts. the Lesbians Gays Bisexuals Of Botswana NAMIBIA
South Africa has twice taken the title of Mr Gay (LEGABIBO) staged a successful gay and Female same-sexual activity is legal but male
World, and hosts the event finals again in 2015. lesbian film festival during Valentine’s week same-sex activity is not, though Namibia has
Go to mrgayworld.com at the University Of Botswana. Things are not actively enforced its anti-gay laws.
DNA 65
/ FEATURE
Carry On Adam!
A difficult childhood + a love of camp comedy =
Adam Richard. As an Australian media personality,
he’s brought nudge-and-wink innuendo to
breakfast radio, gay-ed up sci-fi and flirted with
footy players on the telly. But there’s more to
his comedy career than meets the eye, as John
Richards discovered.
66 DNA
THIS IS NOT A SUBURB you’d expect to find
the Fabulous Adam Richard. Once dubbed
“Australia’s Funniest Homosexual” by The
Melbourne Star Observer, Adam’s public
persona is one of high-camp extremes, of red
carpets and celebrity gossip. Whereas this is
the only decent café in one of Melbourne’s less
salubrious neighbourhoods. There’s not much
that’s fabulous about Reservoir, but it’s where
Adam calls home (Spicks And Specks host Josh
Earl also lives in the area).
I’ve known Adam a long time. When we
first met he was a spoken-word artist with
a surname everyone misspelt. Now he’s a
hugely successful comedian, a star of radio
and television with a surname people only
occasionally misspell: it’s Adam Richard,
O
singular, not Richards, plural. Adam’s real DE
VI
surname is Dellamarta, which he abandoned
because “it’s too hard to spell!”
Adam and I created the TV series Outland
Adam (right, wearing a dalek dress) in Outland with Paul Ireland (left) and Toby Truslove. “Everyone who
together, Australia’s first (and, so far, only) all- watched Outland, loved it. And the people who loved it, loved it,” says Adam.
gay sitcom and we’ve met up to drink too much That’s when you go, ‘Oh yeah, we had nothing’.
coffee and discuss his long career for a DNA We had months where Mum was cooking on a
feature. wood-burning stove because the gas had been
Over the years Adam has done everything turned off. Like, how long does it take to not
from covering the Academy Awards to pay the bill before they come around and turn
appearing on Celebrity Splash to flirting with the gas off?” Gaypocalypse was Adam’s 2014 Melbourne
Brian Taylor on The Footy Show. He’s been a And money wasn’t the only problem for the International Comedy Festival show which he
voice on the best-rating radio stations in the young Adam. also toured to the Sydney Comedy festival
country, a host on the popular podcast Talking “I hated my Dad. He was an alcoholic and he and Adelaide Fringe. The Age described it as
Poofy and on our televisions in Outland and had a gambling problem, which was why the “offensive, and not particularly funny.”
Spicks And Specks. He’s toured both at home gas was cut off. I think a lot of comedians are
and internationally, and brought fisting jokes outsiders and it’s the reason people enjoy our everyone else was doing Shakespeare.”
to the middle-classes. point of view because we look at life in a way He then started doing spoken word gigs
So at first glance Reservoir seems an odd that people haven’t thought of before. It’s that and performance poetry, with his first TV
choice (in 2011 The Age deemed Reservoir old tradition of being the court jester; someone appearance on Melbourne’s community station
Melbourne’s 176th most desirable suburb. who is not of the norm.” Channel 31 as part of Bent TV’s queer hour. So
By comparison, Melbourne’s heroin capital Adam’s first foray into performance wasn’t how and why did he make the leap to stand-up?
Footscray came in at number 37). But in some comedy, however, but Shakespeare. His first “I was seeing a lot of it. Corinne had just
ways it’s a homecoming, as Adam grew up in a gig was actually in a 1994 La Trobe University started doing stand-up and kept dragging me
similar area, on the mean streets of Brunswick. production of Romeo And Juliet. He was a ring- to gigs because it’s really threatening backstage
“Brunswick was a proper slum then. All the in to help out his friend, Corinne Grant. for a woman. It’s usually one woman on the bill
Greek and Italian families worked their asses “I played Friar Lawrence. The director’s and a lot of really blokey guys, so backstage can
off, both parents working all the time so they mum said she’d never thought of Friar be intimidating. So she’d take her fag handbag
could move to Doncaster and buy a house – Lawrence as the main character in Romeo with her and I’d just sit backstage and gas-bag
with cash probably,” he says. “Everyone wanted And Juliet before,” he laughs. “It’s obvious with her so she didn’t feel so isolated. It was
to get out of there. It’s all Hipsterville now.” really! I was standing right up the back in one terrifying. And I saw a lot of really homophobic
So yours was a rough childhood? scene, where everyone’s emoting, and I was stuff. That was kind of the style back then.
“I guess, but you don’t really know that just wringing my hands and gurning. Going People like Greg Fleet and Judith Lucy were the
until you look back on it and compare your ‘Oooh, I totally married these two and I didn’t aberrations really. Everyone else was just telling
experience of childhood to someone else’s. tell anyone!’ I was in a Carry On movie while dick jokes.”
DNA 67
/ FEATURE
Hanging around with stand-ups meant that to be loving. I used to make my mum play Big inside. When I worked at Fox, the number one
people kept telling him he should try it, so Spender and I would do the Gypsy Rose Lee reason for wanting to do that job was that the
eventually he did. Was he the only gay in the strip to get changed out of my pyjamas and into majority of people listening to radio are listening
stand-up village at the time? my clothes to go to school.” to your show. And if you’re a gay voice on the
“There were others, but no one had really Before DNA readers write in angrily, Adam radio, regardless of how you get there or what
made it the focus of what they did. Scott adds, “I know Big Spender’s not from Gypsy but you’re doing, then over a period of time people
Brennan started not long after I did, and he that was my favourite.” just become okay with it. That was my thinking.
would occasionally mention it, but it wasn’t We assume your mum ‘knew’ then, from an We’re being listened to by mums in cars. I
the centre of his stuff. Toby Sullivan was also early age? started in 2003 and the kids of those mums
working around then, and even afterwards “I think it was fairly apparent.” would have gone from four- or five-years-old to
when Anthony Menchetti started he didn’t Having mentioned that the comedy scene at teenagers. And hopefully, having a mum who for
mention he was gay. It was songs about the time was blokey, it seems odd that Adam’s ten years thinks I’m hilarious, they will be able
girlfriends for the first few years before he told next move was to commercial radio, which is to go, ‘Mum, I’m gay,’ and her first question is,
everyone he’d been to gay conversion school!” famous for its blokey machismo. ‘Are you as funny as Adam Richard?’”
So you deliberately chose your sexuality as “When I did Fox FM, they wanted someone He laughs. “It’s not about saying anything
a focus? gay because it was a female-skewed station and particular or being particularly political, it’s
“It was meant to address the balance. I would they knew that every women in their thirties just about being there, constantly. Every day.
deliberately not mention it until about a minute had a gay best friend. They wanted to have a For a million people in a city of three million
or two minutes in, get laughs with regular gay best friend on the radio so the radio would people, listening to you talk shit about the
jokes, and then bring it up. Sometimes you be their gay best friend in the car on the way to Kardashians.
go and see a stand up and they’ve got maybe work. So they created this celebrity gossip role. “Whenever I had problems with management
a missing arm? Or they’re in a wheelchair or It’s not a job I’d ever desperately wanted. It was or felt what I was doing was hollow or shallow
something and they don’t mention it? And a bit of an accidental career.” or awful, I would just remember that unlike
you’re like, ‘I just need you to acknowledge Well aware that there were potentially Richard Reid or Nelson on the morning shows,
that. Just bring it up!’ And for me, I’m quite homophobic undertones to having “the gay while they were really camp, there was never
camp. So I felt like I had to mention it.” guy” doing the gossip segment, Adam felt the any discussion of their sexuality. Whereas I
Adam famously let the audience acknowledge good outweighed the bad. would always bring it up. It’s not like I have a
his gayness with a joke along the lines of, “You “It’s about choosing what you want to gay agenda, it’s just that if you don’t mention it,
may have guessed I’m gay – by my accent.” subvert,” he says. “There’s no point fighting a you become invisible.”
“It was almost like the audience going, ‘Oh battle before you’ve got a job. You can’t change Things seem to have shifted in the years since
thank god, he knows!’” the world from the outside, you have to be Adam started. Comedy has embraced the gays
What followed was a surprisingly meteoric
rise in the stand-up scene.
“January 1997 was my fifth ever gig and
it was a Raw Comedy heat, and that was in
the national final with Lawrence Mooney,
Damian Callinan and Tahir from Fat Pizza…
people had seen me on that and I just started
to get work. A lot of work all of a sudden.
My sixth ever gig – my first paid gig – was
at The Last Laugh supporting Simon Pegg. I
got so much work I was not ready for. I went
to the Edinburgh Festival and I was meant to
be doing the middle bracket, the middle 15
minutes, which is about where I was in my
abilities, but the guy who was meant to MC
couldn’t, so I said I would. I just went, ‘Yeah,
I’ll try that,’ and if it fucks up who cares?”
Many comedians talk about growing up loving
Billy Connolly or Bill Hicks records and knowing
they wanted to be like them, but Adam’s comedy
touchstones were, unsurprisingly, different.
“I liked really camp stuff when I was a kid! Are
You Being Served? was my favourite show, after
Doctor Who, obviously. I loved Carry On movies;
Kenneth Williams was hysterical. I really had no
idea about the sexual context of it, just Bernard
Bresslaw dressed as a nurse was the funniest thing
I’d ever seen because he’s the most unconvincing
woman! I used to love John-Michael Howson on
The Mike Walsh Show. That was essentially what I
felt like I was doing on the radio. Early influences: (top) John Inman, Mollie Sugden and Wendy Richard in Are You Being Served? (left)
“My favourite musical was, and still is, Gypsy Kenneth Williams of Carry On fame, and (right) Bernard Bresslaw as a nurse in Carry On Doctor was, “the
– which is inappropriate for an eight-year-old funniest thing I’d ever seen because he’s the most unconvincing woman!” says Adam.
68 DNA
with Tom Ballard, Josh Thomas and Hannah
Gadsby now high-profile performers who are Ella Hooper, Josh
Earl and Adam in
comfortably out. the Spicks And
“Josh is the face of a huge, multi-million dollar Specks re-boot.
advertising campaign at the moment [Optus].
It’s a big deal. But I still feel like here in Australia
we’re a bit behind. It was a big decision at the
ABC [to cast Adam in] Spicks And Specks when it
shouldn’t have been. People are comfortable with
gay people who are not, like, that gay. Josh isn’t
that gay, Tom’s not that gay. I am that gay. Joel
Creasey is that gay. And I think on some level
that’s still threatening, that de-masculinisation of
being a man is difficult for people. Comedy is a
really masculine art form.”
So gay is not the problem, being camp is?
“Yes, but I also think it’s a threat to being gay,
too. Gay people see it as behaviour from the
old days when it was a secret language and you Adam’s had two somewhat truncated ABC set about challenging myself as opposed to just
used to talk like that so other gay people would television adventures: the narrative comedy going to work and having fun.”
know that you were gay and you could hook up Outland and the rebooted Spicks And Specks. Let’s He’s left radio, Spicks And Specks has finished
in the toilets. But yeah, I’ve always been a warts start with Outland, the show we made together. – what now?
and all… faggot.” “Everyone who watched it, loved it. And “I’m having three months off so when I get
Adam lets out a hearty laugh at this crude the people who loved it loved it. I went to the to the end of it I can ask myself what I want
summation of his life. If he was starting again Samsung shop in Sydney the other day and to do now. The last three years of radio were
now would his material be as gay-focussed as it the guy was like, ‘Oh my God! You’re from exhausting. I’m 43 now, and when you hit your
was then? Outland. I loved that show!’ forties the hangovers get more difficult. That’s
“I probably wouldn’t start.” “I was stopped by lesbians on the street in part of the reason I haven’t had a drink in 12
At all? Seattle who wanted to tell me how much they months. I’m just really tired, physically exhausted.
“I probably wouldn’t see the need. I felt I was loved it, which was a fascinating experience. I’d really like to start writing comics again. I went
doing something. I had an agenda other than We had feminist blogs around the world raving to comic-writing school in 1991 and loved it and
about it, which is odd for a show with only one I never did anything with it. I had prepared a few
woman in it. People know me from all sorts submissions and then did my first gig and got
of things but with Outland it’s always really really side tracked. I went from doing one gig in
People are affectionate. It’s a different kind of…” He trails
off and shrugs. “And now it’s on Hulu [in the
December 1996 to getting a Moosehead [comedy
award] and going to Edinburgh in ’98. My
comfortable with gay US]. Maybe we’ll find a new audience.” mum died and I lived off her money for a year,
people who are not that What about the new Spicks And Specks, in
which Adam along with Ella Hooper and Josh
just learning to be a stand-up. So I feel like I’m
starting a whole new thing. I need a break.”
gay. Josh Thomas isn’t that Earl replaced the original cast of Adam Hills,
Alan Brough and Myf Warhurst. Why didn’t
After many years of avoiding mentioning his
parents and his upbringing, he’s now opening
gay. Tom Ballard isn’t that that set the world on fire?
“I think the people who liked it last time didn’t
up about his past. Is his childhood something
he’s now come to terms with?
gay. I am that gay. And I want anyone else to be sitting in those chairs. “I’ve been doing a lot of therapy because I was
DNA 69
/ FEATURE
Department
Of
Waist
Management
Some form of underwear is tucked into the
top drawer of every man’s tallboy – but
how exactly did it arrive there? Matthew
Myers offers a brief history.
70 DNA
Before Beckham: American boxer Jack Dempsey (above) had, perhaps, the greatest influence of any
sportsman on men’s underwear trends in the 20th Century. The boxer short (left) is named after the
style of shorts he wore to fight in. Note also, the singlet-style top (right), sometimes called a tank top.
to something served with chips, it actually boxer who made them famous, John L Sullivan.
meant scrotum. And while many copied the Curiously, the boxing ring brought about
king’s style for the remainder of the 16th another advent in men’s undies: the boxer
Century, historians have debated if old Henry’s short. Jacob Golomb, who developed the
huge codpiece actually contained medicated Everlast sports brand, decided to create a
bandages to combat venereal disease. Having featherweight style of boxing shorts and
said that, the codpiece was also often used as a replaced the trunk’s leather belt with an elastic
handy pocket. Obviously not for condoms. waistband. By the 1930s, what had be seen as
In the Victorian era, a tighter, longer-legged prizefighters’ sportswear became the in-vogue
garment that connected with a shirt became underwear of the Jazz Age. During this time
popular. It later evolved into the “union suit”, period, the word “underpants” entered the
worn by soldiers in the American civil war. dictionary, and boxers were all of a sudden The traditional loincloth involves roles of fabric
Known for their warmth and a convenient challenged with a rival – briefs! carefully twisted between the legs and around
“drop seat” or “fireman’s flap” at the back, this In 1935, Arthur Kneibler, an apparel the waist rather than the leather lap-lap that
head-to-toe garment would, in turn, become the engineer at Coopers hosiery company received Tarzan is often depicted wearing.
tighter long johns, named after the champion a postcard from a friend visiting the French
Fabrics have evolved but the cut of men’s underwear has changed very little between the 1970s and today.
DNA 71
/ FEATURE
72 DNA
By the 1930s, what had been seen as
prizefighters’ sportswear had become the in-vogue
underwear of the Jazz Age.
way of a hybrid. Enter, Calvin Klein. Perhaps there was a similar reaction to the first
Along with leading designers such as codpiece back in Tudor England?
Tommy Hilfiger and Ralph Lauren, Calvin Underwear design is advancing
Klein began a revolution in underwear that continuously. While Canterbury sells a style
used sex as the selling point. In the early called “ball control”, some designers believe
1990s, Klein’s head of design, John Varvatos, the next move should be crotch sizes, akin
raised the bar by combining the butt-hugging to the sizing of bras. Considering the ratio
firmness of a brief with the cut of a boxer to of waistband measurements to, ahem, one’s
create the boxer-brief, also known as the fitted manhood, may not be as strange as it sounds.
boxer or hipster trunk. To top it off, Klein got Andrew Christian, Cocksox, Aussiebum Anyone for shuttlecock? Women are still the main
a muscled Mark Wahlberg to display them and others are targeting the gay market with buyers of men’s underwear. Wives want their
in advertisements and before you could say enhanced butts and built-in front pouches that partners to look like David Beckham. Mums want
their sons to play manly sports like, er, badminton!
Y-front, every man and his “boys” wanted a do for a man what the wonderbra does for a
pair. In one of history’s greatest marketing woman’s breasts. In the era of social media,
moves, Klein cleverly branded his name across it’s now common for brands like Andrew
the elastic waistband. Who needed a billboard Christian to have Tumblr pages where fans
in Times Square when hip-hop singers and
gay men could be walking advertisements?
post their underwear selfies.
The future of underwear will no doubt
A Public Airing Of
Calvin Klein underwear became so popular
they became simply known as “Calvins”.
continue to follow the many directions and
dimensions of its forerunners, but don’t rule
Underwear
Today, Calvins are as popular as ever, and the out the long reign of the original jockey brief. Undressed: 350 Years Of Underwear In Fashion
is an exhibition currently running at the Bendigo
boxer brief flourishes. Underwear has become Reports from around the world, including Art Gallery in Victoria. Organised by the world’s
so innovative and sexualised that even the our own DNA poll, show that a classic tighty- leading museum of art and design, London’s
skimpy G-string and thong have given way to a whitey is still the most popular among men. Victoria And Albert, the exhibition details a
new half-side thong pouch. Officially termed a Perhaps it can be developed into a loincloth? history of the undergarment from 1750 to present
day. Apart from many rare, delicate historical
String Latéral Flash Bleu Alter, recent internet items, pieces from iconic designers including
images of gays wearing them on a beach went More: For further information visit Calvin Klein, Christian Dior, Gianni Versace and
viral with the question, “Are they serious?” undressedbendigo.com Jean Paul Gaultier are on display.
Kinky Cut
Underwear companies 11% Classic
that market to gay men White
understand the importance Nothing 39%
19%
of a generously filled pouch At All
to create the right impression
– not unlike Henry’s codpiece 31%
back in Tudor England. Fun
Prints
DNA 73
/ FASHION
Rodiney
Ruffs It
Rufskin and Rodiney
Santiago (DNA cover #159)
come together for this
shoot featuring the Ruf
Rod range. We like it Ruf,
and we like it Rod!
Rodiney wears Ruf Rod
boardshorts.
74 DNA
Rodiney wears Ruf Rod
swim shorts.
DNA 75
/ FASHION
76 DNA
Rodiney wears Ruf Rod
swim trunks.
DNA 77
/ FASHION
78 DNA
Rodiney wears
Ruf Rod tanktop.
DNA 79
/ FEATURE
We Need To
Talk About
Rape A year after being drugged and repeatedly
raped by his handsome date, Richard Morgan
courageously tackles the complexities of sexual
assault – and why we’re getting it wrong.
80 DNA
handsome: 30, well-built, tall with long black
hair, a surfer’s laugh, and great taste in X-Men
(Gambit). He was not some lecherous old man.
He was not a sexually repressed loser. There was
nothing about him that was “rapey” (a word I
“I MADE THESE FOR US to celebrate,” he said, detest). The sex itself was – I can’t really say it
sauntering out of the kitchen with two shot was good, because that’s far too moral of a word
glasses full of a red concoction. and far more than he deserves, but it was highly
“Celebrate what?” I asked. skilled. He knew exactly what he was doing,
He cocked his head to one side. “You’re here!” exactly how to stimulate me. What he didn’t
he cheered. “You finally made it.” know was when to listen to me saying “no”,
I had been on a long, gruelling bus ride up when to stop, when to realise that my kicking
from Washington DC to his apartment in New and punching and shoving and screaming and
York. It was already 9:45pm on a Friday last writhing was not just some sick role-play while he
summer. I felt sore and had just taken a shower blasted Lady Gaga’s I Like It Rough. He covered
to rid the bus experience from my skin. I laughed my sobbing mouth with his hands. He hushed me
and, holding the towel around my waist in one and called me “sexy,” as in “You got this, sexy.”
hand and the shot glass in the other, I looked at When I wrote about men who are raped by
it. “What’s in it?” women for Details magazine in 2004 it caught
“Gin!” I thought he said, more excitedly than the eye of [right-wing TV host] Bill O’Reilly, who
he should have. Gin makes me sick. “That’s discussed it on his show. “If you’re lucky enough
not really my thing,” I said. Then he pouted, as a guy to have some girl come on to you in
comically and even adorably: “But I made it just that manner,” he said, “but you don’t want to
for us.” reciprocate, you stand up and you leave, unless
So I drank it and it was a bit sharp but really the woman is 240 pounds and tackles you. The
delicious, like tart watermelon. “You can hardly man is traditionally stronger and better equipped
taste the gin,” I said. to leave the room.” There is a great disbelief out
“What gin?” there, despite the numbers – from the Center
“You said there was gin.” For Disease Control, the National Institutes Of
He laughed. “I said G.” Health, the Justice Department – about how one
He meant GHB, Gamma-Hydroxybutyric acid, in 33 men have experienced “a completed or
commonly known as the date-rape drug. Later attempted rape” or how 12.9 percent have been
came several more druggings, as he held Gatorade sexually assaulted. Mostly it’s by men they know.
up to my limp lips with who-knows-what mixed (I have a couple dozen mutual Facebook friends
in. I spent the weekend – about 60 hours – semi- with my assailant.)
conscious and didn’t leave his apartment until Some people still see rape according to the
Monday morning. Sometimes I think I never left old cliché: vile men dragging innocent women
his apartment, that someone who merely looks into dark alleys and then brutalising them.
and sounds like me walked out. As we are finally learning, the reality is much
I had received anal sex twice in my life before more complicated than the conventional
that night. By weekend’s end, it was 17 times, wisdom suggests. Sometimes those women
according to my fog-of-war count. Eyes squeezed experience orgasm, which can be psychologically
shut, the tally was the only thing I focused devastating. I was erect for much of my rape
on at times – like a ticking clock in a solitary (at least the parts for which I was awake, but
confinement cell. Every addition to the tally probably other parts, too); my assailant knew
meant I was one moment closer to the end. He how to stimulate the physiological response of
moved out soon afterward, which helped erase an erection – as opposed to the emotional or
the existence of that place for me. psychological response – even if I was crying or
I was raped. I had met him a few weeks earlier actively trying to think about unsexy things. I
at a house party, and we had hit it off. He was wasn’t handcuffed or tied up, but was in a version
DNA 81
/ FEATURE
of dissociated shock. The invisible, immeasurable straight and have never had sex, you’re a virgin. I don’t want to give him even the possibility of
shackles of such a violation are immense. If you’re gay and have never had sex, you’re taking more.
From the bed I could see the front door but confused. How can you know you’re gay unless Being assaulted changed sex for me. The total
it was miles away and I thought, “No, I won’t you’ve tried it? In the wake of my nightmare – absence of intimacy during that horrible weekend
be able to get to the door, unlock it, open it and and all the subsequent nightmares and daymares restored my need for it. In the world of hook-up
escape before he beats the hell out of me.” And that have come with it – I wanted nothing to do apps, where you can know the size of a paramour’s
what was my option, anyway? To run, naked with sex. But what is a gay man who doesn’t have penis before you know his name – if you ever
and groggy, through his halls and down Ninth sex? I wasn’t even sure what I became. learn his name – sex becomes worse than casual,
Avenue? It’s amazing how much fear can make When I finally freed myself from that worse than carnal; it becomes transactional. Using
you want – really want – to appease a captor. apartment – I flatter myself; the truth is, he was Grindr and its ilk, men order guys over to their
Rape may be as bad as murder, but, like done with me – I took the next train out of town. apartments as if they were specialty pizzas.
murder, there are many kinds of rape. War-crime I wanted to be as far away as I could. From the Afterward, the 30-day anti-HIV drug regimen
rape, date rape, rape as a ritual for pledging a lobby of Union Station in DC, I sobbed into my weirdly helped things. I was certainly not about to
fraternity, spousal rape, incest, rape with known
assailants, rape with unknown assailants, police
officers sodomising a man with a broomstick.
Rape contains multitudes. Any discussion of
rape is going to require us as a culture to get
In the world of hook-up apps, where you can
much more imaginative about it. (Helpfully, know the size of a paramour’s penis before you
the US Justice Department just expanded its
definition to include men.) Every time we discuss know his name – if you ever learn his name – sex
rape as if it’s only men dragging women into
alleys, we make the act of reporting it all the
becomes worse than casual, worse than carnal; it
more uncomfortable, burdensome and alienating
for women being raped by their boyfriends, or
becomes transactional.
students being raped by their teachers, or men
being raped by women, or men being raped by
men. It is an act of theft on top of an act of rape. phone and told a friend what happened. He might be sexually active in that time. It enabled a kind
What’s shocking about this limited perspective have saved my life by urging me into a cab to of monasticism. My new rule became that I didn’t
is, sadly, how much opportunity there is to see Whitman-Walker Clinic, where I began a 30-day want to have sex with anyone I wouldn’t bring to
the full spectrum of rape in our culture. Not anti-HIV drug regimen. (I am still HIV-negative.) a dinner party. I recently spent an evening with
only are dozens of colleges currently embroiled In the exam, when the nurse asked me to exhale a guy that peaked with hand-holding. (It was
in sex assault investigations – including James deeply, I could smell his sweat and semen on my everything The Beatles promised and more.)
Madison University, which just punished three breath, and I began crying all over again because So much – too much – of our collective gay
rapists with “expulsion after graduation” (or, I didn’t remember giving – or being forced to story is about sadness and despair and downfall.
as a friend noted, just “graduation”). There are give – fellatio, and suddenly I realised there was Giovanni’s Room. Dancer From The Dance. The
the twin revulsions of Dov Charney and Terry a whole extra circle of Hell, hidden horrors done Normal Heart. Angels In America. My Own
Richardson. New York magazine put Richardson to my unconscious body with no way of ever Private Idaho. Philadelphia. Brokeback Mountain.
on its cover last month with the question, “Is knowing fully what happened. Milk. Weekend. When the two hot teenage boys
Terry Richardson an Artist or a Predator?” as if I wasn’t going to write any of this. But even in Y Tu Mamá También hook up, it destroys their
a person cannot be both. There’s self-described given all those statistics, I’ve never heard a story friendship. Even Will And Grace ended with the
“Vine star” Brittany Furlan on the red carpet told from my perspective, and certainly never lifelong friendship in ruin. It’s an unspoken trade-
for Soap Opera Network’s Daytime Emmys expected to be the one telling it. I had come to off: gays can be in pop culture as long as they’re
coverage telling a male actor, “We’re going to accept my life as a kind of ongoing closet: a secret vacuous or miserable or both, as if we’re born
get you away from us before we rape you.” It’s room in which a plaything called Richard – with the gene for sad endings (#itgetsbitter).
a world where George Will realistically can called “sexy” – was broken by some zealous I can’t offer a happy ending here. I don’t want
defend writing that sexual assault survivors child. But the untold stories are precisely the the sort of closure that turns incidents like this
“make victimhood a coveted status that confers most important stories to tell. The more stories into a neat three-act Law And Order episode. I’ve
privileges”. The website GOPrapeadvisorychart. that are told, the less they can all be the same. decided instead – and writing this is the first step
com, which tracks Republican blunders on rape, I know how dumb and selfish and even – that the resulting self-awareness, and hopefully,
is now in its eighth edition. endangering this can sound, but I don’t want to beyond me, a truer social awareness of rape, is a
When male victims are discussed, it’s charge my attacker (not everyone does). After sufficient coda. It would be pretty ironic for me
almost always about children – the [convicted the James Madison University assault, the to force my takeaway upon anyone else, but in
pedophile] Sandusky stories and all their survivor told the Huffington Post that, “It was the year since my trauma, I’ve rededicated myself
perverse variants. For adults, in or out of kind of hard for me to deal with. I just tried to kindness and hope and intimacy, which has
prison, male-on-male rape is mostly thought to diminish the situation. I didn’t want to made me feel comfortable enough to realise that
of as an attack on a heterosexual victim, rape bring it up, didn’t want to talk about it.” That my story can serve a purpose, too. That, I pray,
adding homophobic insult to injury. Yet rape resonated with me. I don’t want anything to can at least be an everlasting happy beginning.
is, ironically, always on the tongues of men. do with him. I don’t want him in my life, even
“I’m gonna rape you in Halo!” “This Monday in a courtroom. I kept imagining, perhaps too More: This piece was first published by The
morning is raping me.” “Paper jam? Ugh, I cinematically, that he’d toss off some haunting Washington Post, and is republished here with
their kind permission.
wanna rape this printer.” quip as he was hauled away. I won’t let him. If you have been sexually assaulted, consider talking
The terrible thing about being a gay man I won’t even let him have a name now. He’s a to the National Sexual Assault Hotline, 1-800-656-
is that it is dependent on expression. If you’re nameless demon who has taken so much that HOPE (USA) or Lifeline, 131 114 (Australia).
82 DNA
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/ GAY WORLD
Best.
Toronto hosted
World Pride 2014 and
simultaneously set a
new benchmark for the
globe’s gayest gathering.
Pride.
Marc Andrews reports
from Canada.
EVER.
year it was Toronto’s turn to shine and, boy, did
they dazzle. The execution was flawless, the
sense of style was sexy and they managed to do
it all in their famously polite Canadian way. It’s
hard to find fault when every little thing was
done so meticulously and with such attention
to detail. On top of that, true Canadian
friendliness made the city feel like home even if
you weren’t a local.
Toronto, believe it or not, was actually the
first North American city ever to win the
honour of hosting World Pride. It got the nod
back in 2009, so they had five years to plan,
plot and prepare their outfits. In case you’re
wondering, Madrid is up next as the fifth city
to host World Pride, in 2017.
SEE
MORE
84 DNA
Lo v i n g To r o n t o !
DNA 85
/ GAY WORLD
t i n To r o n t o !
Ho
86 DNA
What Toronto did better than most previous Grand Pride Wedding where Canada welcomed
host cities was to ensure the mix between gay couples to make their commitments official.
partying and politics, enjoying the good times Lest we forget, Canada is one of 18 countries
and remembering the bad, was just right. The around the world that has legalised same-sex
organisers promised at the outset that they would marriage (they did so back in 2005).
put on an event “that you will remember for a Big names also showed their support. Melissa
lifetime”. They weren’t kidding. Toronto World Etheridge appeared at the opening ceremony,
Pride went above and beyond to make sure Canada’s most famous lesbian, KD Lang, took
everyone was included, going the whole distance part in a fundraiser gala, plus gay recording
to serve up LGBTTIQQ2SA (that’s lesbian, gay, artist Steve Grand, singers Deborah Cox, Carly
bisexual, transgender, transsexual, interested, Rae Jepsen, Dragonette and even Aussie DJ
queer, questioning, two-spirited and allies). Once Kitty Glitter dropped by. There were plenty of
again, it’s that minute attention to detail. glittery alumni from RuPaul’s Drag Race in
Even the weather played along. While most town and giving good face including Courtney
people don’t expect Toronto to be a city of Act, Adore Delano and last season’s quick-
searing sunshine, think again. During what witted winner, Bianca Del Rio.
amounted to the 30th anniversary of Pride There was still plenty of sex. Toronto hosted
events in Ontario’s capital, the temperature a Pyjama Porn party (“watch adult movies with
often hit 30C and above. Thankfully, free water other sex nerds,” it promised), an exhibition
fountains were located around the festival, and called Archiving Public Sex and even a nudist
plenty of sunscreen was handed out, too. dance, Proud Men Exposed Naked.
While there were the to-be-expected big The big parties were held in exceptional
hangar-like dance parties, big parade and the venues like the gritty Pitbull party at the
street party, they were balanced by a human Liberty Grand, the SS Steamworks sauna which
rights conference, a candlelight AIDS vigil and boasted a boat cruise around the harbour, or
even an art piece to commemorate the 45th the Revival Party featuring a huge Circuit-
anniversary of Stonewall. The city also gave style dance floor plus a rooftop dance space
its much-admired multicultural mix billing offering something more muscle-bound and
alongside all the other events. For starters, there raunchy. Then there was the Prism party at the
was a brOWN//out event for the South Asian Sound Academy, offering a priceless view of
queer communities, Black Queer Youth, a Trans the shimmering skyline from across the bay.
Pride march, an interfaith service (One Song – The security at all parties was respectful and
Many Notes), Indigenous Arts Festival and even a discreet, as it should be.
DNA 87
/ GAY WORLD
The World Pride festival effectively kicked off Importantly, big name companies made
at the central Green Space location in the heart a point of getting involved in the week-long
of gaytown on Church street. This corner block festivities without it smacking of blatant
offered a place where everyone could come commercialism. Air Canada was a major
together to meet, love, flirt, belong, celebrate sponsor, the Hilton took out ads in the gay
and dance. All proceeds raised were funneled press featuring a gay threesome in a pool, while
back into The 519, Toronto’s gay community chain store Marshalls gave out rainbow flags.
centre. For the Starry Night opening, they Even beer companies, such as Bud Light and
scored arguably the biggest star of them all Molson Canadian, were heavily involved.
in these parts (no, not Justin Bieber!) with As the 553-metre CN Tower lit up like a
Ontario’s openly gay Premier Kathleen Wynne. rainbow for the Festival, it looked like there
The mini political dynamo took to the stage was magic in the air. That appeared to be
to wild applause, proclaiming Toronto was “a the case right after the World Pride Parade.
beacon for inclusiveness. I want to shout out After steamy weather during the afternoon, a
to all the pioneers who made it possible for us lightning-quick storm brewed and the heavens
and all the kids to be here. We still have to be opened up. As it moved away, a huge rainbow
vigilant – that’s what World Pride is about. We appeared over Toronto. It couldn’t have been
are blessed but some people are not.” more magical if it had been designed by
Before she left, arm-in-arm with her partner Disney. Perhaps Mother Nature just wanted
Jane, Kathleen declared with unabashed to give her gay children a sign that she was
optimism, “Never give up… and listen to the watching over them.
voices that say yes you can!” As she left the stage, Toronto, take a bow. You did yourself, and
the formalities finished and the partying kicked us, proud.
off appropriately with the Irene Cara classic,
What A Feeling. It just seemed the right song for DNA’s corresponents were guests of the
the moment as a myriad of rainbow flags were Canadian Tourism Commission. For more go to
canada.travel
unfurled along with a true sense of pride.
88 DNA
e P a r a d e !
World Prid
SEE
MORE
DNA 89
/ GAY WORLD
“Diversity is
attractive!”
Mathieu Chantelois
was part of the team
that ensured Toronto
seized the day.
90 DNA
DNA 91
/ PHOTOGRAPHY
Royal
Berlin, Altes Stadthaus Mitte
92 DNA
Mint
Di
a design, with only three making the final elements into the design by using different
photography leave us round. I was one of those three! I tried to make facets to create the portrait of the king.
speechless? Interview by a design that had an extra layer to it – not
just a pretty design. There are many rules for
Speaking of monarchs, if you were
commissioned to do a portrait of Queen
Tim Warrington. designing a coin (durability, fraud resistance, Elizabeth II, how would you shoot her?
DNA 93
COPYRIGHT ERWIN OLAF
94 DNA
/ PHOTOGRAPHY
I always try to capture someone’s personality in an
aesthetic way, so I would try to do that. But it really
depends what the portrait is for.
What can you not live without? My partner, Kevin.
Your photographic series include titles like Grief
and Royal Blood. What is that about? With Royal
Blood I was interested in society’s fascination with
death – this combined with our obsession for youth.
The worldwide outpouring of grief for Princess Diana
was a good example of this, a kind of mass televised
hysteria, which truly fascinated me.
What was the reaction to your image of Princess
Diana? Largely positive but some people were
offended. I kind of understand that reaction. She was
adored by the people, but also she was the most recent
person depicted in the Royal Blood series. I really like
the portrait. I never intended to cast a look-alike, but
once the model put on the wig, she looked a lot like
Diana. It was a bit unsettling.
In the classic novel Brideshead Revisited, the
character Charles Ryder says, “a camera is a
mechanical device which records a moment in
time, but not what that moment means or the
emotions that it evokes. Whereas, a painting,
however imperfect it may be, is an expression of
feeling – an expression of love. Not just a copy
of something.” Is this accurate? No, I don’t think
DNA 95
COPYRIGHT ERWIN OLAF / PHOTOGRAPHY
Grief
96 DNA
DNA 97
/ PHOTOGRAPHY
Le Dernier
98 DNA
Paradise
having my work exhibited all around the world; be spectacular, more exhibitions, and a lot of
the reception of my installation work. The holidays I hope!
Keyhole [his installation from 2011/2012] was
an artistic breakthrough. It was fantastic to More: visit www.erwinolaf.com
have different fields of my work come together. All images copyright Erwin Olaf.
DNA 99
/ TRAVEL
to up the ante and add more and at least two thirds of them
feathers, or speedo pouches, to expected a bus trip there and back.
its cap with the 2014 Water Park, This led to big waiting lines in the
held on the grounds of a working blistering sun and at the opposite
kibbutz about 30 minutes north of end after it finished around 10pm.
the city in Herzliya. The party itself was well managed
While the Barcelona Circuit with a good cloakroom and plenty
Water Park is notorious for being of shade to keep people out of
a little sloppy when it comes to the searing heat if necessary –
Barcelona is famous for its gay Water organisation, as with most things something Barcelona still hasn’t
in Spain somehow at the last managed to figure out, or get right.
Park party, but this year Tel Aviv threw a minute they manage to make As with the Barcelona event,
rival splash. Who’s wettest and wildest? everything work. Which brings us
Marc Andrews dives in to find out. to the Tel Aviv event. This being
the inaugural year, there were a
PHOTOGRAPHY SHAUL ALFIAH few teething problems, most of
them to do with logistics. While
The mood
cab fare would cost around $40, was very friendly,
ON THE EUROPEAN gay party with a wealth of gay bars, clubs
the organisers were also offering
a coach service for around $1 sexual and
circuit, the one unmissable event is
the Barcelona Circuit Water Park.
and businesses to support the
waves of rainbow tourists from
per person. So far, so good. Only
thing is that the buses weren’t able
peaceful. You
It’s hot, huge and horny. At last
year’s event there were so many
abroad. With a very vocal and
active gay population it seems
to cope with the amount of people
who wanted to use them.
would never have
beautiful men it was as if an army only natural the city would want Over 2,500 people bought tickets known you were
of lovers had descended to show
the world just how gorgeous the next door to Syria,
global gay gene pool can be.
Little wonder that Tel Aviv,
Lebanon and the
long-touted as the next big gay
travel destination, threw its hat
Gaza Strip.
into the ring last June and held
its own Water Park during its
week-long Pride celebrations.
Tel Aviv is the Middle East’s gay
oasis. What could never exist
anywhere else in this volatile
region is encouraged within this
city’s broadminded borders. It has
the right climate, perfect beaches
and a welcoming gay population
100 DNA
there were plenty of rides
available and a huge wave
too concerned, apart from one
or two straight lifeguards, and
plenty of very wide grins were
the order of the day. Tel Aviv “Impress Our
pool with a DJ, sound
system and plenty of Google
sponsoring. Everyone received
generally the mood was very
friendly, sexual and peaceful.
You would never have known
had never seen anything like
this on quite this scale before.
Hopefully those still residing on
Handsome Men!”
Samuel “Sammi” Dadon is a
a complimentary waterproof you were next door to Syria, the kibbutz grounds had either
familiar face on the Israeli gay
pocket to put valuables in while Lebanon and the Gaza Strip. taken absence or a sleeping pill, scene. He's run a gay restaurant,
splashing around, a nice and The music was on the cheesy or were wearing heavy-duty taught gay yoga, and currently
necessary touch, as were the side, veering at times into earplugs as the party raged presides over the Evita Bar in
free caps and bags handed out strange territory (as when the DJ on into the evening, body central Tel Aviv. He's also one of
during the day. Security was suddenly played Bob Marley’s temperatures only rising as the the Water Park event organisers.
at a minimum and not too reggae classic One Love and blazing Mediterranean sun was
intrusive, on a much better level tried – and failed – to get the setting. That such an event went
than in Barcelona where you crowd to sing along) but nobody off without too many hitches, let DNA: What made you decide to hold a
are practically strip-searched minded too much. When the alone protests or worse, needs Water Park event during Tel Aviv Pride
at the Water Park before being beats became more Middle to be praised. The holy land this year?
allowed entry. Eastern in rhythm the crowd became the homo land, just for Sammi: There was always a need for
This tiny nation of six generally went wild, though they one day and night. a big event during Pride week. We
million’s most highly visible gay also did the same when Beyoncé If the logistics can be gone needed to create an event that was all
man, hunky Eliad Cohen, was was played, proving some things over a little more carefully water and only for gays and similar in
busy promoting his Papa brand are universal – gay men love for future parties (more buses shape to the world’s major festivals. It
with swimwear, merchandise their divas! please!), the Tel Aviv Water was impossible in the past, but now it
and appearances. The muscled There were, literally, men Park party is likely to be one finally happened in Israel.
Israeli was happy to throw from every corner of the globe that lycra-lovin’ gays will be How long was it in the planning? A few
some skin onstage for adoring wearing every conceivable shade coming back to enjoy year after months of work and another year of
fans and pose for photos, all of colour that skimpy swimwear year. Barcelona, you have been rolling ideas. The Water Park group has
pumped up to perfection. comes in. Beach balls, baseball put on notice! five people.
As is the Israeli way, being caps, flip flops, sunscreen and How many attended all up? About 2,500
rather direct and living for the people.
moment, there was plenty of Did you look at the Barcelona
canoodling in the changing Sammi (centre with beard) and
some of this Circuit Waterpark as your
rooms, in the toilets and even in year’s Water Park guests. benchmark? Of course! The event
the wave pool. Nobody seemed in Barcelona is our inspiration,
but we gave it an Israeli flavor… or
temper [laughs].
Your Water Park was held on a
working kibbutz. What was their
reaction? Everyone hugged us with
love from the beginning until the
day of the event. Of course we knew
we had to keep to the basic rules
and not disturb the tranquility of the
people who live on the kibbutz.
Are there plans to do it again? We
decided it would be an annual event
and we have already chosen the date
for next year.
What things will you change next
year or do differently? We have
already had a working group to talk
about improvements. I got comments
from people who had been at the event
and they said they thought that it was
amazing! People said that it was the best
event held in Israel.
What else do DNA readers need to
know about the Water Park for 2015?
Readers, we invite you to our next event
and invite you to visit Israel. Visit our
amazing sites, enjoy our amazing parties
and impress our handsome men [laughs].
DNA 101
/ WHO'S HOT?
Ryan
Craven
Ryan dropped by Frank Louis’ New York studio recently for a
photoshoot and a lollipop! “Ryan is playful and fearless in front of
the camera,” says Frank, “and, yes, his eyes really are that blue.”
102 DNA
Ryan wears 2Eros swimwear.
DNA 103
GROOMING /with Lee Kynaston
Hot
First
Date?
Put your best foot forward
with grooming guru Lee
Kynaston’s guide to
pre-date perfection.
SPRAY TO PLAY
Your fragrance should be a weapon of mass
seduction not mass destruction, so choose your
olfactory ordnance carefully. Never overdo
it. For maximum benefit (and longevity)
spray eau de toilette on places where it will be
trapped against the skin – like the
chest, back or biceps – and stick
to a maximum of three sprays.
You want your fragrance to be
more a precision bombing than a
campaign of shock and awe.
You might also want to opt for
fragrances like Caron Pour Un
Homme, Creed Royal Scottish
Lavender and Prada Luna Rossa
that are big on lavender. According
to research at The Smell And
Taste Treatment And Research
Foundation in Chicago, the smell
of lavender can increase blood
flow to the penis by 40 percent. I’ll
say that again: 40 percent.
104 DNA
scalp, causing you to scratch. Unfortunately, BANISH BAD BREATH suck on one a few minutes before your
scratching doesn’t just make your personal Next to a crop of cold sores, date to instantly halt halitosis.
hygiene look a bit suspect. In body language there are few passion killers quite Longterm, the best defence against
terms it’s an action associated with insecurity, as potent as a case of halitosis. bad breath is regular flossing.
nervousness and even deception – not Alcohol-free mouthwash might
exactly the qualities you want to promote solve problems after you clean REFRESH YOUR HAIR
on a first date. To deal with the problem your teeth but its effects have No time to wash your hair pre-date?
you need a shampoo such as Neutrogena T/ often worn off by the time you No worries – cheat by refreshing
Gel Therapeutic Shampoo, that contains really need them (ie, when you’re it with a dry shampoo like Batiste
an ingredient called zinc pyrithione – an heading for some serious tonsil Dry Shampoo Classic. No longer
antimicrobial agent that tackles the yeast (quite tennis), so what you need is a the preserve of festival-goers and
literally) head on. pocket-sized freshener. soap-dodgers it’s the perfect pre-date
Cheap and effective sugar-free pick-me-up, putting life back into
GET A HAND JOB BEFOREHAND gum is perfect for improving hair and making it manageable (in
No, not that kind of jobby – I’m talking breath as it not only dislodges case any fingers are run through it)
manicures. If there’s one thing you really need trapped food particles but and fragrant (in case anyone should
to pay attention to on a date it’s your nails. I’m stimulates saliva – the mouth’s nuzzle it).
not saying buff and polish them to the point own defence against odour- To use, section your hair with
where you look like Nicki Minaj; just make causing bacteria. Also useful is your fingers and spray at the roots
sure they’re clipped and clean. Why? Well, UltraDex’s Fresh Breath Oral where hair tends to be greasiest.
if you’re quite happy to flash grubby nails in Spray, which has an antibacterial Then hide can.
his face, chances are he’ll worry about the active ingredient so it doesn’t just Ideally, though, you'd schedule
cleanliness of anything else you might want to tackle nasty smells but the cause time to wash and condition your
flash in his face later. of them, too. hair. Clean hair is sexy stuff.
For the best results trim the nails straight Alternatively, keep a few
across, using nail scissors (which reduce the cardamom pods in your pocket and
chances of the nails splitting), then round
off with an emery
board. Try trimming
after a bath or
The smell of
shower when they’ll
be softer to slice, and
lavender can increase
do your toe nails at blood flow to the penis
the same time.
by 40 percent. I’ll say that
DE-SHINE YOUR
SKIN again: 40 percent.
Imagine the scenario:
the date is going
brilliantly. You both like
your Arrabbiata hot, you POLISH YOUR JEWELS
both hate broccoli and In the last five years a plethora of grooming
you both think Kylie’s products have popped up aimed at keeping
Kiss Me Once was a bit your family jewels sparklingly fresh and
duff. It’s love. Except that, clean but, honestly, below the belt grooming
when he gazes adoringly at isn’t rocket science. Clearly a tidy trunk line
your face, all he sees is his is no bad thing (nor is a splash with water)
own reflection thanks to but if you’re heading straight from work to
your oil-slick skin. your date why not keep your boys fresh and
Men’s skin is naturally dry with a dusting of Balla Powder, specially
oilier than women’s and formulated to combat (and there’s no polite
stress and nerves can further way to put this) a sweaty sack.
trigger oil production. Whatever you do, though, don’t attempt to
Thankfully, there’s a simple mask any natural man smells with your eau
solution. What you need are de toilette. B.O. and Boss Bottled rarely go
pre-date mattifying products together. To borrow a phrase from the world
like Lab Series Oil Control of politics – it’s not the crime that’s the sin, it’s
Daily Hydrator or Kiehl’s the cover-up.
Oil Eliminator 24 Hour
Anti-Shine Moisturiser, both
of which are specially formulated to mop up More: Award-winning journalist Lee Kynaston
excess oil and leave skin with a matt finish. is one of the UK’s best known male grooming
experts. He writes for numerous newspapers,
And when you’ve got a matt finish, you’re more magazines, websites and blogs at
likely to get a happy one. www.groomingguru.co.uk.
DNA 105
/ DNA PT
106 DNA
PHOTOGRAPHY SIMON LE
GET
ISSUE
DNA 107
/ DNA PT
is one of the biggest mistakes people make when I explain low GI carbs being like a dripping tap: glasses of water and wait 10 minutes.
sitting down to eat a meal. The easiest way to the fuel drips into your blood stream slowly over 8. Cut Back On Dairy I know we all love a bit
judge portion control at each meal is to measure a longer period of time giving you longer lasting of dairy but let’s make some sacrifices to lose
your protein and carbohydrate using the palm of energy rather than a quick spike then a crash. that last bit of flab down the bottom of your
your hand. You’re better off eating more greens. 6. Eat Good Fats Good sources include natural abs. Dairy is quite high in sugar and sugar is
2. Calorie Control If trying to reduce your body raw almonds/cashews/walnuts, extra virgin the devil. Dairy is not as nutritional as we may
fat percentage, you must reduce your daily calorie coconut oil, avocado, raw almond/cashew butter, believe. A tin of salmon in spring water has far
intake from your maintenance total. I recommend Omega 3 fats from salmon and other fish. A lot more nutrients than a glass of milk.
consulting a professional to help work out a of people tend to steer clear of fat when trying to 9. Be Consistent Make a conscious decision
healthy deficit. My Fitness Pal is a great app to lean out. Eating monounsaturated fats helps to to remain consistent. Make sure you have a
help count calories and macronutrients. keep you feeling fuller for longer and taps into goal and a plan. Do one thing at a time. Be in
3. Eat Green If you want to get lean you have a different energy source. Just be careful with the present moment.
to eat green. Aside from all the other health portion control as they are quite high in calories. 10. DON’T MAKE EXCUSES
benefits you gain from eating greens they are A little bit goes along way.
full of fiber and aid in the digestion of all the 7. Drink Water We all know we should be HEALTHY LIFESTYLE
protein you’ll be consuming. Eat up! drinking a lot of water. I suggest 3 to 4 litres You’ve had a big day at work. Go on, sit down,
4. Eat Lean Protein Good sources include per day. Something I see too often is people grab that glass of wine and reach for the Thai
lean chicken/turkey breast, lean cuts of red that mistake a feeling takeaway menu.
meat, white fish, eggs and egg whites. I eat 3 to of hunger when really It’s Friday. Work’s done for
4 servings of red meat per week along with my they are dehydrated. the week, time to head to the
BSC protein supplement. They reach for bar to de-stress.
5. Eat Low GI Carbohydrates Good sources food before water. I Saturday morning rolls
include quinoa, rolled oats, brown rice, yams/ suggest before eating around and you need a big
sweet potatoes, black-eyed beans and chickpeas. food, down 1 to 2 big hangover feed to fix you up
before dragging yourself to the
gym to chat to friends about
the previous night and to make
plans for the night ahead.
Over-eating is one
of the biggest mistakes
people make when sitting
down to eat a meal…
You’re better off eating
more greens.
108 DNA
About Matt
MATT CHAPMAN, 28, is a Sydney-based fitness
professional who trains daily and loves to
cook. But Matt’s passion for food was once an
obsession that led him to become an obese
teenager who lacked confidence and who was
teased at school.
“As a teenager, I felt very different to
everyone because I was so overweight,”
he says. “I didn’t like what I saw in
photographs. One day, when I was 15, I was
sitting down and I grabbed my stomach
with two hands. I knew I had to change.
That afternoon I put on my runners, ran 500
meters and then walked home. Everyday I
set myself a challenge to run a little further,
then a little further, until I could run for five
kilometers without stopping. I used to run at
night because I could go anywhere and no
one could see me.”
Matt also taught myself how to eat properly
and the importance of nutrition to positively
fuel the body. “I started reading books
about nutrition. I wrote down everything I
ate, studied it and developed my own point
scoring for the food I was eating,” he says.
“My disciplined exercise program and my
self-developed point scoring food system
worked. I lost 18 kilograms in 12 months and
since then cooking, nutrition and fitness have
become central to my life.”
Matt became motivated to teach others the
lessons he’d taught himself. He sharpened his
skills with certificates in fitness and specialist
fitness courses.
Today he’s an in-demand personal trainer
and health consultant who has graced the
cover of DNA and international fitness
magazines, and even found himself on
The Ellen Show in LA as Ellen’s Mr Sydney
underwear model. For his global followers,
and locals waiting to access a personal
training session, Matt has developed an
online training program called 8 Week Body
By Matt.
His holistic approach to training is part of
taking people on a positive, life-changing
journey. And there are many success stories,
like the retired guy who’d never stepped foot One day,
in a gym and lost 16 kilos training with Matt,
or the guy who’d never seen his abs and has when I was 15, I
now sustained a washboard core, increased
his strength and totally changed his diet.
was sitting down
“I want to help as many other people as I
can transform their lives through fitness and
and I grabbed my
nutrition, to coach people to lead happier stomach with two
and healthier lives. Everyone is different and I
do anything I can to try to help a client reach hands. I knew I had
their goal,” he says.
to change.
More: Go to mattchapman.me
DNA 109
110 DNA
MAN
ART BY ALLAIN DE LEON
WORDS BY ARTHUR WOOTEN
SEE
MORE
Attraction
Doctor: (Ears perking up.) Reaction?
Patient: I’d hide it and run down the hall to the
communal showers and stand in the far corner
under the cold water waiting for it to kill the
arousal.
Doctor: (Sweating.) Did you say arousal?
Patient: For that entire first year we were
But Doctor, if he walked a straight line, I wouldn’t have inseparable. He talked about some girls on
campus he found attractive but I don’t’ think
to wrestle with my fantasy… he messed around with any. The day we said
goodbye to each other before summer break, he
grabbed my head between his two massive hands
Patient: Doctor, I have a problem. Patient: Aw, sex is easy. There’s just something and said, “I love you, bud.” Then he brought his
Doctor: If I had a dollar for every time a patient about me that straight men are attracted to. full lips close to mine but kissed me on my neck.
cried – (sighs) – before you begin, may I say, you Doctor: What you need is hydrotherapy. Not a peck, a real freakin’ sexy neck kiss.
are quite stunning. Patient: What? Doctor: (Wiping his brow.) And the following
Patient: Thank you. I’m a model. In fact, I’m just Doctor: Strip down and step into my office, er, year? Roommates again?
back from shoots in London, Rome and Paris. my hot tub. With all these problems I can see Patient: No, I never saw him again – until last
Doctor: Lucky you. (Looking him up and your shoulders are hiking up. week. In Paris of all places!
down.) Are you Middle Eastern? Patient: Really? Doctor: Now that’s romantic.
Patient: I’m part Japanese, part Saudi Arabian. Doctor: The 52 stainless steel jets pulsating Patient: Tell me about it. We collided in a tiny
Doctor: How exotic. Now, off with your story. piping hot water will melt away your troubles as patisserie in the Marais district. He recognised
Patient: I’m only attracted to straight men. will some Valium, Klonopin, ecstasy, cannabis – me first. And without saying a word, he planted
Doctor: (Snickering.) How’s that working out or maybe all four! his lips, those two sexy pillows of masculinity
for you? Patient: No thanks, I don’t do recreational drugs. onto mine and literally swept me off me feet. He
Patient: Quite good. Doctor: Who’s talking recreational? I’m your took me to his flat and made love to me over and
Doctor: (Perks up.) Really? Tell me more. doctor and I’m prescribing them for you. over again. I wasn’t sure if I was dreaming or if it
Patient: I always knew I was gay but didn’t act Patient: No, I want to deal with my problems was actually happening. What brought me back
upon it until late in life. with a clear head. to reality is what he said next.
Doctor: Late? How old are you? Doctor: What problems? Doctor: (Dabbing his face with a handkerchief.)
Patient: 25. Patient: When I was at school I had a Is it hot in here?
Doctor: Why I’m probably old enough to be roommate. The moment I met him I fell head Patient: No, he said, “Man, I love you. I’ve
your grand… uh, your big brother. Carry on. over heels in love but could tell he was super always loved you. I haven’t stopped thinking
Patient: What I mean is, I didn’t have sex until macho, very straight. I thought the best thing to about you since the day we said goodbye.” He
I was in university. Against my modelling agent’s do, living in such tight quarters, was to tell him added that running into me in Paris was fate,
wishes, I played football. I was a fullback. upfront that I was gay. serendipity, synchronicity. He said he’d been
Doctor: (Winking.) I’m sure you were. Doctor: And? living a straight life but upon seeing me again, he
Patient: (Does a double-take.) Anyway, I’ve Patient: He was so cool about it. He even said his realised he was gay.
always had tight hamstrings that cramp up so little brother was gay. When he came out he said Doctor: We should all have your problem.
after every game I’d have a massage with the he was so proud of him. Patient: No, that is the problem. What is the
team’s masseur. He was a former professional Doctor: And? first thing I said to you?
footballer and still in awesome shape. He was, Patient: Both my roomie and I were from out- Doctor: That you find me oddly attractive and
and still is, happily married with kids but every of-town and had no friends at school so we did feel that having sex with me would help to put
time I’d lie down on his table, he’d practically everything together. We went to movies, out to your troubled life into perspective?
mount me as he did deep tissue sports massage. dinner and although he wasn’t a footballer, he did Patient: No, I said I’m only attracted to straight
He’d slather me up with hot oil and go to town join the wrestling team. men.
but I never had a simple happy ending. Doctor: (Drooling.) As in singlet? Doctor: And the straight man of your dreams is
Doctor: How thoroughly disappointing. Patient: You bet. I had never wrestled before so now in love with you.
Patient: Not at all. In the course of a session, he would practice moves on me. He’d insist on Patient: But he said he’s gay.
he’d give me three, sometimes four, I guess wearing his singlet and since I didn’t have one, Doctor: Don’t get hung up on labels. Sexuality
you’d call them, happy in-betweens. And then he’d let me borrow one of his. is fluid.
the ending would be mind-blowingly explosive Doctor: Did you both sport dilhouettes? Patient: No. (Crying.) The whole thing is ruined.
for both of us. Afterward I’d get up off the table, Patient: What? Doctor: (Under his breath.) Dude, you need to
we’d shake hands and I’d leave as if nothing had Doctor: Dilhouettes? The silhouette of your see a real shrink.
happened. I actually asked other players if he had dicks showing through your singlets.
come on to them, but they all said no. Patient: Why, yes, we did. We’d get down on More: Find the writer at arthurwooten.com, on
Doctor: What are you doing here? You should the floor and before I knew it he had me tied Facebook or Twitter @Arthurwooten. Find the
artist at http://urbanmusiq.deviantart.com or
just keep having massages. All that sex is up like a pretzel. Instantly we’d break out into a search for 85th Street on Facebook.
extremely therapeutic. sweat, his body grinding into mine. My favorite
DNA 111
/ THE BACK PASSAGE
NOT IN A FROCK!
time I’d done something on that scale and it
was very special.
Most theatregoers would say that
Hairspray’s Edna Turnblad was an
exceptional role. Would you agree? I
loved it! They didn’t want her to be a sort of
man-in-a-dress parody. They wanted a real
›› Keeping up with outrageous Trevor Ashley – or woman with heart, even though it was being
trying to! Interview by Matthew Myers. played by a man. Because my whole career had
been playing women, it felt very easy for me. I
felt very natural doing it, because I didn’t take
the piss out of her and didn’t make fun of the
DNA: You’re referred to as the busiest anything else, it’s the music, but the show fact I was in drag.
man in Australian showbiz and Mardi also draws you in emotionally. It takes you on Is there one particular future role you
Gras royalty. How does that sit with you? such an enormous journey. I got to see it on have your heart set on? There are actually
Trevor Ashley: I like it! I’m very lucky that Broadway a few weeks before rehearsal and two. I’d love to play Albin in La Cage aux Folles
I’ve worked for so long and it’s incredible what there were tears! and a big dream of mine is to play Mrs Lovett in
I’ve managed to do in my career. I’ve loved my Of all the productions you’ve done, has Sweeny Todd, which is really odd, but I want to
association with Mardi Gras over the years, and there been one favourite? Everything has do it. And I’d also love to do the MC in Cabaret,
it’s one audience that has always been there for me. been special in its own way. One of the best but I don’t think I’m physically right for it. I’d
Do you have a new show up your sleeve? moments in my life was doing Diamonds Are have to go on a great big diet regime to get to the
There’s a King Kong slash Lion King slash For Trevor at the State Theatre in Sydney. I right state! I’ve even thought it would be great to
Jurassic Park panto that I have the whole had seen Shirley Bassey there, and to be on do Cabaret as Liza doing Sally Bowles! It would
concept for. It’s all in the works. the same stage Mardi Gras Eve in a sold-out be a lot of fun, but maybe just for a one-off gala
You did a tribute to Shirley Bassey with concert with 2,000 people… it was the first or something like that.
Diamonds Are For Trevor. What is it
about her? Bassey is one of the first people I
saw live in concert at the Sydney State Theatre, “I was in New York earlier
and it was extraordinary. Her recorded voice is
amazing, but seeing her live just blows it all out this year and met Liza
of the water. She’s always been one of my idols,
so to hear her live was one of the highlights of
my life! I’ve heard she knows about the show
Minnelli’s publicist. He
but I don’t know what she thinks.
Better to not know? It’s like when I was
said, ‘I know who you are.
in New York earlier this year and met Liza
Minnelli’s publicist. He said, “I know who
I don’t like you and I don’t
you are. I don’t like you and I don’t like what
you do.” I’m not sure how I’d cope if one of
like what you do’.” Trevor in the current Australian production of
Les Mis. He’s not the one in the frock. Shock!
the people I impersonate met me… I think
I’d rather not know. But you know people will What about a more dramatic role, say
impersonate me – to me! They’ll do my voice guest starring on a TV drama? Anything
and I’ll say, “That’s not what I sound like!” like that would be great. I’ve got a couple of TV
If you had the chance to perform a Bond projects that I’m working on, but I’d like to do
theme, which one would it be? A toss up some more acting. Doing Les Mis will hopefully
between Diamonds Are Forever and Skyfall. I’d make people realise that I can actually act –
also love to do Conchita Wurst’s Rise Like A and play a man!
Phoenix from this year’s Eurovision. I thought The big question is, who is Trevor
it sounded like the perfect Bond theme. Ashley’s diva? I have so many… it’s so hard to
You landed the role of Master Of The pick, but it’d probably be Bette, Liza and Shirley,
House in the new Australian production but I’d also add in Rhonda Burchmore, because
of Les Misérables. Was that a pinch I absolutely adore her. We’re good mates and
yourself moment? I saw Les Mis as a child and getting to work with her was fabulous!
was in love with it. I definitely wanted to be part of What has been your most embarrassing
it one day. Sir Cameron Mackintosh came to see wardrobe malfunction? The worst ever was
me in Little Orphan TrAshley and the next thing in Priscilla when I was one of the cupcakes
I’m being rung to say come and audition for the in the MacArthur Park fantasy. So I’m a giant
role of Thénardier. So I went through the process cupcake and I tripped over the patty that
and was told I got it by Sir Cameron himself – in was hanging around like a skirt, and landed
my dressing room on the London West End, while face down in front of the orchestra pit! And I
I was doing Liza On An E! Being handpicked by couldn’t get up!
him, yes, a pinch yourself moment.
What do you think makes Les Misérables More: Les Misérables is playing at Her Majesty’s
so enduringly popular? More than Theatre in Melbourne.
112 DNA
G e t Y o u r
DN A M a n MAN
NOW!
BY ALLAIN DE LEON
DNAMAGAZINE.COM.AU/DNAMANPRINTS
/ URBAN_HOMOSEXUAL
Famous Last Words: “If any of you have a message for the Devil, give it to me quick –
I'm about to meet him.” Murderess Lavinia Fisher on the gallows, 1820.
#isthatamonkeywrenchinyourtoolkit? us homos, but the staying power implicit in the a bit of “hard yakka”.
above associations is appealing to all of us. Admit it, surely most of you have had similar
Men. In. Uniform. Then there’s the uniform that demonstrates fantasies.
Admit it, as soon as you read those words sporting prowess. Of course, when you allow what is essentially
dozens of images, like a collection of soft porn Also a sign of staying power as well as plugging a costume to be the beginning and end of
flashcards, flickered across your mind. into some very primal urges. somebody’s attractiveness you are imbuing
You saw epaulettes, cargo pockets, tight buns As does the revealing nature of such uniforms. them with a whole lot of attributes that they
and aviator sunnies. Lean. may, in fact, not have.
And you felt a stirring in your loins. Strong. And thereby fetishising them.
That’s what men in uniform can do to us. Perfectly proportioned. Is there such a word?
And not even the actual men, but just the mere Well hung. You know what I mean.
thought. Everything a good hunter-gatherer-provider- Totally objectifying them.
And that’s what the October issue of DNA has cave-man oughtta be. Which, I’ll admit, I am totally up for.
traditionally been all about. For despite all modern protestations re equal And let’s face it, when you objectify another
Page after page of handsome well-built models, power in a relationship, the thought of being human being you only have to deal with what
in various stages of disrobing from a vast array dragged home by some Neanderthal is still a you have decided them to be, and not what they
of uniforms that are all just a little bit tight, and fantasy for many. really are.
artfully covering the nether regions in such a Knowing, of course, that so few measure up to
way that still reveals those impressive bulges. the standards set by a Tom Of Finland drawing
Not this year though. or a Herb Ritts photograph.
Apparently, the word from the DNA powers-
that-be is we’re over that theme.
Secretly hoping That fantasy is going to come crashing down
anyway, so why not run with it as long as you
Um. my charms will inspire can?
Really?
Yup. him to forget his next We do it all the time anyway.
With all kinds of uniforms, official or
That’s what I heard.
We’re over it.
customer, as well as otherwise.
That bespectacled man is intelligent.
Since when? I hear you ask, echoing my own
thoughts exactly.
his Lebanese family in And therefore sensitive.
That suited man is successful.
Are gay men ever really gonna be ‘over’ men in Belmore, and suggest And therefore willing to share his riches.
uniform?
From Lord Kitchener to the Village People, we head into the That tattooed bad boy is up for anything.
And therefore good in bed.
men in uniform have always held a seductive
power for men into men.
bedroom for a bit of And yep, I’ve hit the nail on the head right
there.
But why?
What’s it really all about?
hard yakka. Nailed it. (See what I did there?)
All the fantasising, the fetishising and the
Of course, it’s obvious to some extent. objectifying.
A fireman. That’s what it’s all about.
A policeman. Then there’s the uniforms of those who can, Being good in bed.
A soldier. you know, like, do stuff. Because if he’s good in bed he’s good at
Vocations that, when carried out effectively, Mechanics. everything else.
require extreme doses of masculinity. Plumbers. Or if he’s not good at everything else it doesn’t
They’re about protection. Electricians. matter, because being good in bed is the most
And serving. Even your run of the mill handyman. important thing.
And when required, rescuing. Men who can fix things just don’t realise how And despite everybody’s efforts, finding a man
Because, be honest, there is secret appeal in sexy that makes them. who’s consistently good in bed would seem to
being the damsel in distress and relying on a Especially when they come sporting some be the most challenging of quests.
dashing, uniformed, stranger to swoop in and perfectly worn King Gees. Notwithstanding the epaulettes, the spectacles,
save the day. Pouching in all the right places. the bulge, and something we haven’t yet talked
And ideally fall a little bit in lust with our You know the look. bout – the dance moves – true sexual prowess
vulnerability at the same time. Maybe it’s not at the top of your sexy_men_in_ does, in fact, constitute a rare find. URBAN HOMO IS A WORK OF FICTION. ANY RESEMBLANCE
Now, truth be told, helpless vulnerability is not uniform list. What is it they say? A good man is hard to find, TO ACTUAL PEOPLE OR EVENTS IS PURELY COINCIDENTAL.
all that attractive a trait in a man. But, fuck, I think it’s hot. and a hard man is good to find.
But if it brings on some rough but chivalrous Complete with the cotton poly blend polo shirt Ideally we’d like that man who’s good and hard
help, then it’s worth turning on. with a logo and first name on the left pectoral. to be up for it on a regular basis.
It may, in fact, come quite naturally. Hubba hubba. And for me the uniform he wears is not as
DNA DOES NOT ENDORSE DRUG USE.
Particularly if you’re a big bottom. I personally am a big fan of Hire A Hubby. important as the type he fits, as long as he
Or, so I’ve heard. I get them round to change light bulbs, for doesn’t misread mine.
My straight female friends have suggested fuck’s sake. So on that note, I’m off to find a well-hung
that any man who holds down the sort of Secretly hoping that my nonchalant charms Latino top with a degree and a Mercedes.
job that requires them to wear a uniform will somehow inspire them to take leave of And a penchant for short and hirsute.
also demonstrates an ability to commit to a their senses, forget their next customer, as As long as he doesn’t expect me to be butch
program, and to follow through with promises. well as their Lebanese family in Belmore, and with that I should be OK.
Commitment may not be all that important to suggest that they take me into the bedroom for And yeah, he’d better have a sense of humour.
114 DNA