ST Georges, 8th August 2014: Tristans Hat, Scheepers and Life Tips by Tarrant

almanac
st georges, 8th august 2014
tristans hat, scheepers and life tips by tarrant
happenings
cover
Robin Williams has unfortunately
passed away, with his death reportedly being suicide. This does not hinder
the legacy he has left behind to us,
but depression is a very serious issue,
and people should never be hesitant
to reach out to others for help.
Youre free now, Genie.
administrative
Nothing this week from admin. Do people read this
part? Not sure. Think well just chuck in some words.
Heres how to make a gin and tonic.
Ingredients
4 to 5 tonic water Ice Cubes
3 ounces gin
4 ounces tonic water
1 tablespoon freshly squeezed lime juice
Lime wedge for garnish

Directions:
Place the ice cubes in a tall, narrow, chilled glass (the
cubes should come near the top.) Add the gin, then
the tonic water, then the lime juice, stirring well.
Garnish with lime wedge, and serve immediately.
Courtesy of the foodnetwork.com. Enjoy mid-life!
goings on
Dont hate the player
TBL (Throw Back Longman)
Hampson
Double O Jevans
Whos the lucky guy Angela?
Reow !!!
beers
weekly
the populace
tears
community dinner!
robin williams died
congrats to jaxo for being captain of his hockey

team
robbie williams didnt die

fire drill
college blazers
we are no longer keeping

up with the kardashians
the old chan

st georges college spring
festival...?
drinking games with

cards
tav chips with chicken
salt
cocktail parties
jury still out
lack of hot breakfast hash

browns
ebola
the mcfeast is back
spencers hair
wild krill oil
g ramms bum
open day
8 am class
the show archer
smorthwaites relationship
absence of single jevans
mt lawley bakery bread at

cocktail party profile picmeal times
ture changes
not knowing whether to

handshake or fist bump
or some other thing
georgian of the week

official
unofficial
Official: Georgia Ramm
for repping at the open
day
Unofficial: Michael
Nelmes for taking the
initiative to buy new
front lawn goals
letters to the editors

RUFFLED FEATHERS
Morning all,
Im writing in response to the
comment last week by the dog,
Georgie. While I understand that
feeling of exclusion, I think that a
little splash of perspective would
not go astray. We need not to
fight, but to flock together as a
group, and burst forth into the
sky like water from a fountain. I,
for one, am perfectly content to
ride this crazy wave they call life,
blowing like a precious reed in
the wind. I truly believe we can
all benefit from some reflection.
Ever pondering,
The Quad Mallard
OPPORTUNITY OF A LIFETIME
Whats up guys!
Just your local UWA ambassador
checking in, making sure you
guys are all up to date on the
happenings and the goings-on
of the fantastic establishment
we like to call home!! We know
that you guys at college sometimes miss out on the fun that
uni REALLY has to offer, so think
of me as a friendly bridge from
your boarding school into the
real world!! Remember, there
are a plethora of clubs affiliated
with UWA, which cater to even
the most obscure hobbies, and
are a great way to make new,
weird friends!! It would be TRULY
a shame if you were to never get
involved in uni clubs and orgaisations!!
Speaking of, the guild elections

are coming up!!!! We are all
dying for the election time of
the year, which is when we print
of a bunch of flyers and harrass
people into carrying them to
the closest bin for us! This year
we promise to put a subway on
campus, improve college liasons,
end polio and half the debt ceiling whilst simultaneously patting our head and rubbing our
stomach!! Cant wait to see you
avoid my gaze on campus!!! XD
Sincerely,
A God Damn Independent
p.s. Do we matter yet?
DISGRUNTLED
Hey
Im Millar and I have beef to
squash with these so-called editors. As the creator of the only
good nak in the brief history of
time im yet to recieve any credit.
I literally coined the tears and

beers section. That was all me.
Also, jury is still out? What? If it
aint broke dont fix it, Ive always
said that and I always will.
Furthermore, no one is reviewing games, tv shows or movies.
You guys ever heard of multimedia? To be fair, youre all
useless gamers anyway, and you
wouldnt know a well directed
film even if it Spielbergd you in
the eye.
From what I can see, this whole
thing has turned to shit and Im
more than happy I washed my
hands of the whole situation.
Ive got more writing talent in
one weird thumb than all of
you put together. Its lucky my
friend George is still manning
the wheel, otherwise youd all be
screwed.
Inbox for gym tips,
Tom Millar
The adventures of
We invite you to join us in the documentation of a day in the life of Tristan Dales hat. Its been described as
a rollercoaster, with as many ups and downs as one of the bench press sessions in which Tristan is so known
for. Into the rabbit hole we go...
Fueling up for a long day
Scouting from an appropriate

vantage point
The big city
A well deserved brew
Jacob Marsh, take notes
Debating what really constitutes

real tennis
8 Badass ways to live
Fn
DANGERUSLY
At college
1. Enter the dining hall with your phone on

You didnt mean to bring it with you in the first place, and now you remember
you didnt even put it on silent. But wait, the more you think about it, the more
you realise this was actually a thrilling and DANGEROUS, INTENTIONAL
DECISION. Knowing it could ring at any moment is foreplay to you.
2. Sign up for formal dinner and then cancelWITH MINIMAL NOTICE
Sit back and let the chaos rain down on you. What if youre asked to submit an
apology to the Warden? What if you cant go to the next formal dinner!? Thats
Danger with a capital D, my friend.
3. Leave half a glass of water at the end of a
then DONT REFILL IT
jug
Youre not technically breaking the rules, but you

kind of almost did.
4.
Dont sign up for an event on
Facebook, then wait until the last minute
to buy a ticket for it. HellBUY ONE
AT THE DOOR
Let the confusion run rampant through
the ranks of the committee. How was
the actual revenue slightly different
from projections!?
5. Check your mailat
4:59 on a FRIDAY
What if you got a green slip and the office closed early!? You wont be able to
pick it up until Monday. Seriously, call Kenny Logginsbecause youre in the
Danger Zone.
6. Park on back road
backwards
To add an extra level of danger, make a

post about it. Then watch as people lose
it at you. Feel good about the fact that
most of them probably didnt really
know it was illegal anyway. Everything
behind North is basically the
international waters of college.
and JUST WING IT
7. Go to a study room youve never gone to before
Youve never been in here before, and you dont know the rules. Can you talk?
Can you eat? Can you leave your stuff for a bit?
Who cares? Play Russian
roulette with the deviland WING IT!
8. Experience a small internet disruption
and dont tell bigair
Seriously. Dont call their hot line. Dont even write a professional message on
their Facebook page. Nothing. But how can they continue to provide such a high
level of service if they dont receive your timely feedback? You dont carethats
how. Youre no longer IN danger, youve BECOME the danger.
Written by James Big Jim Tarrant
Closing Thoughts
What if the placebo effect is so succesful because sugar is
a versatile and effective medicine?

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almanac

st georges, 8th august 2014

tristans hat, scheepers and life tips by tarrant

Dont hate the player

TBL (Throw Back Longman)

Whos the lucky guy Angela?

robin williams died

congrats to jaxo for being captain of his hockey

robbie williams didnt die

we are no longer keeping

the old chan

drinking games with

jury still out

lack of hot breakfast hash

the mcfeast is back

wild krill oil

the show archer

absence of single jevans

mt lawley bakery bread at

not knowing whether to

georgian of the week

letters to the editors

Speaking of, the guild elections

I literally coined the tears and

Fueling up for a long day

Scouting from an appropriate

The big city

A well deserved brew

Jacob Marsh, take notes

Debating what really constitutes

8 Badass ways to live

1. Enter the dining hall with your phone on

then DONT REFILL IT

Youre not technically breaking the rules, but you

5. Check your mailat

To add an extra level of danger, make a

and JUST WING IT

7. Go to a study room youve never gone to before

and dont tell bigair

Written by James Big Jim Tarrant

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