Daily Habits - How To Win Your D - Prashanth Savanur
Daily Habits - How To Win Your D - Prashanth Savanur
Daily Habits - How To Win Your D - Prashanth Savanur
I love u Rachu
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Dedication
The only way we can show gratitude to our teachers is by passing on the
knowledge that we have learnt from them. This book is dedicated to my
guru Balakrishnan, to my inspiration Sachin Tendulkar, and to my family and friends.
Contents
Chapter 1: Whats in a DAY
Chapter 2: Win the Battle of the BED
Chapter 3: Go With Your GOALS
Chapter 4: Just One STEP
Chapter 5: Its all about ATTITUDE
Chapter 6: Kill Your ENEMIES
Chapter 7: Put in Something EXTRA
Chapter 8: Tackle Your TONGUE
Chapter 9: Flourish with Your FAMILY
Chapter 10: Its Just the BEGINING
Chapter 1:
Whats in a DAY
When you read the title How to win your day the first question that would have come
to your mind is, What do you mean by your day? or Which day is he referring to
as your day?
Is it your birthday?
Or
Is it our anniversary day?
Or
Is it the first day of the year?
The word your day simply refers to the day when you get up with full energy. Its the
day when you can-get up with all your strength renewed to overcome the obstacles and
challenges that come your way. Its the day to continuously improve, and to not only
fulfill our dreams, but also help others to achieve their dreams.
Its the day where your spouse feels that he/she has the best wife/husband, your parents
feel they have the best son/daughter, and your children start feeling that they have the
best parents in the world.
Is it possible? Yes!
Will all of this happen in a day? No.
All of these will not happen in a single day, but we all have the capacity to bring them to
each day of our life. We all have the chemistry, the making to enjoy every single day of
our life and to make it count. The only way we can achieve that is by winning each day
of our life.
If we flash back to our past, the exact occasions when someone in our place of work, at
home, or in our neighborhood, came and hurt us with spiteful words such as: You are
useless person, Nothing can change you, You are stupid, I dont think you can
make it. Whenever people challenge our ability to do something, weve all made these
statements in response: One day I will show him/her who I am, and what I am capable
of, or, One day I will do this.
One day does not necessarily mean a single day, but it can be anything we have always
focused on to do or achieve in the future, or the very things weve achieved in the past.
Many of us have the enthusiasm, the zeal for one week, and before we know it weve
lost it and we are back to square one.
There is no one day until we realize that today is that one day where we possess all the
energy we need to achieve our dreams. It is neither the past nor future, but the present
that matters.
Will Smith said, Never try to build a wall at the first attempt. Instead, go with an
attitude that will lay bricks, and build the wall as perfect as possible.
Similarly, if we look into our past we might see that we have made many mistakes. We
have all tried to solve our problems and challenges in one shot. Weve tried to build our
Rome in a day, and many times we have failed in doing so and came to a conclusion that,
I cant do this, Its out of my reach.
But now lets not try to be successful in our life. Instead, lets try to be successful every
day. Lets focus on things that we have to do every day so that we can ultimately win our
life.
Whats in a day?
A day has the potential for a new start. A day has the ability to draw lines to what ever
happened yesterday. Every day carries potential for a new beginning, and it can take it to
greater heights.
Our lives are made up of six pillars:
Personal
Family
Intellectual
Financial
Social
Spiritual
Most of us are making a big and common mistake: we are only focusing and trying hard
to build and strengthen one pillar. Some people only focus on their personal pillar, some
others only focus on their family, while most people focus only on the financial pillar,
neglecting other pillars.
Whenever a monument is built, its expected that all the pillars are equally strong so that
it can survive and last for centuries, standing strong during, and against earthquakes. If
out of these six pillars only one of them is strong, then there is a higher tendency of the
monument collapsing when a minute problem surfaces in that pillar.
When something happens and their money is lost to those who have given high
importance and strength to their financial pillar, they will go mad. Some of them may
even go to the extent of committing suicide. When the ones that have given much more
importance to their family loses the control over their family to the point where their
families dont listen to them anymore, they can go into a serious depression.
All these things happen because we give too much importance to one particular area in
our life, making it an aspect a priority. For us to really strike it in life there must be
checks and balances. We need to develop every area of our life to meet standards for
success. As we have learnt, our life is made up of days, and every day we have to work
towards strengthening every area of our life. In this book, what we are going to learn
will directly or indirectly help us to strengthen the six pillars of our life.
Many of us hesitate to think big because we have heard one negative statement or another
that has settled into our subconscious mind. A hypnotherapist will call this limiting
belief.
her nothing but the best. He also loved his third wife very much and was always
showing her off to the neighboring kingdom. However, he feared that one day she would
leave him for another.
He also loved his Second wife. She was his confidant, and was always kind,
considerate, and patient with him. Whenever the king faced a problem, he could confide
in her, and she would help him get through the difficult times.
The kings first wife was a very loyal partner and had made a great contribution in
maintaining his wealth and kingdom. However, he did not love his first wife. Although
she loved him deeply, he hardly took notice of her.
One day, the king fell ill and knew his time was short. He thought of his luxurious life
and wondered, I have four wives with me now, but when I die I will be all alone.
Thus, he asked the fourth wife, I have loved you the most, endowed you with the finest
clothing, and showered great care over you. Now that I am dying will you follow me and
keep me company?
No way! replied the fourth wife, and she walked away without another word. Her
answer cut like a sharp knife into his heart.
The sad king went ahead and asked the third wife, I have loved you all my life. Now
that I am dying, will you follow me and keep me company?
No, replied the third wife. Life is too good! When you die I am going to remarry!
His heart sank and turned cold. He then asked the second wife, I have always turned to
you for help and you have always been there for me. When I die, will you follow me and
keep me company?
Im sorry. I cant help you this time! replied the second wife. At most, I can only send
you to your grave. Her answer came like the lightning, and the king was devastated.
Then a voice called out, I will leave with you and follow you no matter where you go.
The king looked up and there was his first wife. She was skinny, as she suffered from
malnutrition. Greatly grieved, the king said, I should have taken much better care of you
when I had the chance.
In truth, we all have four wives in our lives. Our fourth wife is our body. No matter how
much time and effort we lavish in making it look good on the outside, it will leave us
when we die.
Our third wife is our possessions, status, and wealth. When we die, they will go to
others.
Our second wife is our family and friends, and when we die, no matter how much they
have been there for us, the closest they can stay by us is up to the grave.
And our first wife is our soul, our internal personality which often gets neglected in
pursuit of wealth, power, and pleasures of the world. Our soul is the only thing that will
follow us whenever we go, but we focus the least on it.
I strongly feel that you have already started giving importance to your first wife, which
might be the reason why you have bought this book and started reading it. Only a few
people buy non-fiction books, and 90% of the non-fiction will not be read further than
the first chapter. Let this not be one of the other books which you have not finished.
This book contains all the things that I have learned from various teachers and
implemented in the last five years. As you proceed with the next chapter, you will start
getting many ideas and find solutions to many problems in your life. However, before
proceeding with the next chapter, write down the problems to which you are trying to
find a solution. By the time you reach the last chapter, you will have at least two
solutions to each one of the problems on your list. So, lets rock and roll!
I love u Rachu
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Chapter 2:
Win the Battle of the BED
This is the battle that everyone has to win to make every day our day. However, 95%
of people fail, or give up within a week. In this chapter well find a way to get up early
every single day.
One common mistake everyone makes is that were always busy, trying to find what
should be done to get up early, or how we can get up early, but we forget one important
question.
Why do we have to get up early?
When we get up early, our WILL POWER is at its peak. Our will power increases
when we do things that are difficult to do, and it depletes as we fail to do things which
have been planned. Once our will power is at its peak, no one can stop us. Well have
the confidence to face anything that comes our way.
Will power is like baking powder. Without it, we are flat. With it,
we will rise.
The next major advantage of getting up early is that we get time for ourselves. Just think
for a second. When was the last time you had time for yourself? If youre already giving
enough time for yourself, thats awesome, but many people around the world are so busy
in their day-to-day activities that theyre not able to find time to read their favorite
authors books, listen to music that they love, or able to learn the new things they
desired.
When we get up late in the morning, our whole day is driven by the circumstances we
face. When we get up late, we have to rush to our offices, and most of the time we end
up arriving late. Since we are rushing from the morning, our mind will not be in calm
state because now the work that ought to have be completed in four hours will take eight
hours, or we may not make good decisions in our business lives. We end up failing, and
not giving time to ourselves or our loved ones.
By just getting up early and planning our day, we can manage every area of our lives.
Now that we have the answer as to why we have to get up early, let us see what we have
to do next.
Many times when we have to travel and our flight is at six or seven AM, we may have to
reach the airport by four or five AM. During situations like this, we automatically wake
up before the alarm rings.
Why?
The answer is because we know what we have to do, and why we have to do it. It means
we know we need at least an hour to reach the airport. If we dont get up early, theres a
chance we may be late, or we may miss the plane altogether. So, before we go to bed,
well set our minds to the idea that we have to wake up early.
In a similar way, we set our minds into the idea that we have to get up early and go for
walk or a jog first. But in this case we wont get up, even after the alarm rings. This
happens because our mind doesnt have a clear picture of what we have to do from the
time we get up until we go to work.
Lets assume our work day starts at seven in the morning and we plan to get up six AM.
Our mind should know in advance what that we have things to do from six to seven A.M.
This puts a plan in place.
People who have achieved great feats say that the morning is the golden hour. When we
get up were like a fully recharged battery with full voltage, and we will have all the
energy we need to achieve our dreams. Morning hours are like a train engine, and just
like a train engine has the capacity to pull the whole train, our morning hours have the
same capacity to take us to the next level, to pull us through the hurdles of the day.
One last reason why I get up early is that when I get up, I am literally two to three hours
ahead of the world. While your competitors are still sleeping, youre preparing to win
the day. Imagine that while all the people are still struggling to get up, were already set
to create wonders.
Getting up early will help you to plan your day. Youll reach the office on time while
others are still stuck in traffic. Since we reached there on time, we have some time to
settle down and set our minds towards our work. By doing this we will finish four hours
of work within only three hours. By just getting up early, we are increasing our
performance in the workplace. If getting up early improves our business, were able to
build a better family. Its worth getting up early!
Somewhere a small voice is telling us:
Yes! I have to do this!
Yes! I can become the best employee.
practice this meditation regularly, then slowly your body will start responding to your
thoughts. That is the reason why people say that they healed themselves by simple
affirmation and meditation.
Once your body starts responding to your thoughts and words, thats the time you can
cure any kind of health issue. But it takes some time and consistent effort.
Hold on! Everyone tell us to do meditation and even tells us the benefits of doing
meditation, but who will teach us how to meditate? Right now this might be your
question, and fortunately we have a solution for that too. Please go our website,
www.howtowinyourday.com, and go to the download section where your will get a free
guided
meditation
audio
file,
or
simply
click
this
URL
http://howtowinyourday.com/#download. It is a twenty minute audio file that has all of
the instructions required to start meditation. Just follow the instructions, and after twenty
minutes you will have a top of the world feeling.
As mentioned earlier, after this wonderful twenty minutes, our mind will be like still
water. We will feel like a battery that is totally charged. The next thirty minutes will be
the ideal time to upgrade our self, because our mind will be in a totally receptive mode.
alarm rings. The first thing our mind does is the calculation:
I love u Rachu
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Action time:
Fix a time that you want to get up, and try getting up at that same time every day.
Decide on what physical activities you will do once you are out of bed. It doesnt
need to be the same activity every day. For the first three months, you jog. The
next two months try swimming. Then for the next three to four months try the gym.
Reserve some time to sharpen your axe. Read something related to your field,
preferably after your morning meditation.
Eat less in the night.
Start reading a book before going to bed. Keep your mobile phone away from the
bed.
Decide the place and time where you are going to meditate.
If you are not able to follow what we discussed in any of the chapters, then read the
chapter again, because:
Miracle moments
For the first few days you will feel sleepy during the day time, but once getting up
becomes routine, you will have higher energy levels.
You will have more peace of mind since everything is planned for the whole day.
You will have more confidence at work due to a constant knowledge upgrade.
Your health conditions are going to improve.
Your performance at the office will improve, and in turn, your income will increase.
You will get more time for yourself and your family.
Chapter 3:
Go With Your GOALS
I know that after reading the last chapter, many of us will have decided to get up early
and have started working on our body and mind. These morning rituals increase our
energy level, and we will be enthusiastic throughout the day. But what is the use of
having that energy and enthusiasm if we dont know where, and how to apply it?
Lets assume its a long holiday and everyone at home is getting ready to go out.
Everyone is packing their stuff, clothes, food, emergency medical kit, etc. You packed all
your stuff and took the money required to spend during the outing. Everyone is ready,
stepping out of the house, when you suddenly remember, Oh! We have not planned
where to go!
The trouble with not having a goal is that you can spend your
life running up and down the field and never score.
Bill Copeland
Most of us are in a similar situation; holding our luggage at the door and not knowing
where to go. It is very important to know what we actually have to do. Whenever we see
the word GOAL, the first thing that comes to our mind is the goal setting we did on
January 1st, and which did not last more than twelve days. Its this failure that we
remember every time we see the word GOAL, and our mind immediately tells us that
goal setting doesnt work.
Since I always believe in doing things differently, let us see why we always have a hard
time when it comes to goal setting and achieving our goals. We will see how to set goals
in different ways. There are two types of problems we encounter when we want to
achieve our dreams. People who are not able to fulfil their dreams are stuck in one of
these two problems
1. Not having a goal towards their dreams.
2. Having a goal (but a huge goal) that they are unable to continue working on.
People with goals succeed because they know where they are
going.
Lets see this situation with an example. Assume you have a dream that you want to take
your health to the peak, meaning you want to have the best body, you want to reduce
unwanted fat, and you want to improve your stamina.
Case 1
You do not have any goal at all. You dont know what to do. Youve tried a couple of
things you were told by your friends, but within few days you lost interest, the zeal, and
you stop.
Case 2
Now assume you have a goal. You got to know that by running you can manage your
weight and increase your stamina, and its a more cost effective way where we dont
have to spend money on a trainer or equipment. So lets say today is the first day. You
got up at six AM, got ready with your running shoes, and started running. After ten years
youve finally started the running. You ran for twenty minutes, but somewhere you heard
a voice say push yourself, so you got motivated and completed thirty minutes of
running. On the second day you again got up at six AM, but this time you ran for thirty
minutes. On the third day when you got up you were in severe pain. The first thing your
mind tells you is that, Im suffering from this pain because I am running.
But the actual reason is because you have not run for the last the years and all of a
sudden you ran for thirty minutes. Your intuition tells you to take a rest today. On the
seventh day you will go in front of a mirror and see that nothing has changed. Not your
weight, nor your stamina, and you will start feeling that its not working, its not going to
work, and the show is stopped.
90% of the people are stuck in scenario two, where they will start with full enthusiasm
and fail to persist until the end.
So, here is a solution which works for everyone and has worked like magic in my life.
For those people who are in category one, never start working on anything without
having a target end in your mind. Assume you want to reduce your weight. Set a number
which you want to drop your weight down to because our mind always works to its
The primary thing that we have to keep in mind before, or when setting a goal is
Happiness and Peace, which should be the paramount of all your goals. You can set
anything as your goal, but once you achieve that goal your happiness and peace of mind
should move to the next level. Our happiness and peace of mind will keep on improving
by doing things which we love, not by getting things which we like. The above goal list
only had a list of things I liked, and by getting those things Ill only be happy for a day or
two before I would be back to my old state.
A young kid wanted a bicycle. He thought that if his parents could get him a bicycle, he
would be the happiest kid in this world. One fateful day, his parents bought him his
favorite bicycle. He was so happy that he went and showed it to all his friends. He was
proud to own a bicycle, but after a couple of years he was not so happy. He was not
feeling excited anymore when he saw his bicycle. So, he felt that he would be happy if
he owned a motorcycle. He started part time work. He worked very hard and saved his
income for two years. At last, he got a brand new motorcycle.
He was so excited that he felt he would forever be happy. But the happiness did not last
for many days, so he bought a car to see if he would find happiness in that. Unfortunately,
he couldnt find it. After making a lot of money as a young rich man, he then bought
himself a big mansion and a helicopter for his own use. Initially, he felt good but after a
while, but there was again emptiness in his heart. The happiness he was looking for was
not in the helicopter or the big mansion.
After some time, one of his friends came and told him that he was going to Africa to help
the poor kids, and asked him if he was able to join him. He decided to go with his
friend. While helping the poor people who were in need, he felt very good. There was
this joy in his heart he could not describe. He felt ultimate happiness when he saw a big
smile on those poor peoples faces. He felt fulfilled for the first time in his life, and at
that moment he realized that his happiness was hidden in helping others, and not in his
possessions.
Similar to that man, we are also busy focusing on the things we need, but if you want to
achieve that ultimate goal of happiness and peace, focus on what, and how, you do. Not
on material things.
After reading this chapter, I want you to take thirty to forty minutes to go for a walk or sit
in a silent place where there is less disturbance and try to find answers to the questions
below.
For Sachin Tendulkar, it was Cricket, which was above everything else in his life.
For cricket, he sacrificed his studies and took the biggest risk in playing cricket as a
profession.
For Will Smith its Acting, which has taken first place in his life. He is ready to give
any level of commitment to his acting.
For Mahatma Gandhi and Nelson Mandela, their goal was to free their people and
society from their oppressors. For that they were ready to take any risk, such as going to
jail. They were even ready to die for their goal.
I am not telling you not to dream of your own car or dream of your own house. You can
dream anything, but if you focus on what you do, then all these small things will come to
you more easily, and with happiness.
Once you find the answer to those questions, and then try to write your goals based on
the answers. Lets look at an example. Assume that you love talking to people, so when
you analyzed those earlier questions you got the answer that you will become a trainer.
The main work or aim of a trainer is helping people, giving them more clarity, and
showing people the way to happiness. Now your goals should be like the ones below.
Goal 1- I will help 1,000 people this year by transforming their lives in all areas.
Being a trainer, you should always upgrade your skills and knowledge so that you can
share it with the people you want to help.
Goal 2- This year I will attend two workshops.
Goal 3- I will read four books.
Goal 4- I will attend one spiritual program.
Goal 5- I will attend yoga classes.
Since you have a family, kids, and a personal life, you should also take care of them.
Goal 6- I will start saving for my dream home.
Goal 7- My earning will reach a seven figure mark.
Goal 8- I will take my family on a vacation to Australia.
Being a trainer you also have a small responsibility towards society.
Goal 9- I will help five underprivileged kids in their studies.
Finally, after sitting with it for a week, the boy turned in the same paper, making no
changes at all.
He said, You keep your F, and I will keep my dream. The young man did not give up
on his dream. He achieved his dream, but the best part was that after some years the
same school teacher brought thirty kids to camp out on his ranch.
When they were leaving, the teacher said, I can tell you this now. When I was a young
teacher, I was something of a dream stealer. During those years I stole a lot of kids
dreams. Fortunately, you had enough gumption not to give up on your dreams.
After reading, understanding, and setting our goals, we should be careful about the
people like the teacher in the story. With full confidence about our goals, we can start
sharing them with people in our family or outside. But there are also many people who
are waiting to steal your dreams, to convince you that your goals are not realistic. Be
careful about the people with whom you share your dreams and goals.
By setting a goal in the way mentioned earlier, we arent only moving towards our
ultimate goal, but we are also making other peoples lives better and better.
If you are not making others lives better, then you are wasting
your life.
Will Smith
It doesnt mean trying to change another persons life. It means that on the way of
achieving your dream, the lives of the people in your family and society should be
affected and become better as well.
I love u Rachu
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Action time:
Go to a silent place and find the answer for four questions.
Write the goals based on the answers you receive.
Make sure your goals focus on all six pillars of life.
Beware of the people who steal your dreams.
Miracle moments
Now we know where we actually have to apply the energy generated during the
morning hours.
When we have goals, we are ready to put more time and effort into achieving them.
When you are working and progressing towards your goals, you will have great
confidence and peace of mind.
Chapter 4:
Just One STEP
Many years ago, a farmer in the countryside was in a very bad way. He was unable to
fulfil his obligations as the head of the family. One morning he went to his farmland
holding a bag containing seeds and decided to give it one last try. If I dont make a
profit this time, I will kill myself, he vowed. The seeds he was holding were a rare
species of bamboo, which can grow to be eighty feet tall.
With this final hope, he planted those seeds. Every day, day after day, he personally
carried out watering the spots where he had planted the seeds. Every day he watched
those spots carefully with a dream that the bamboo would grow soon.
With the same hope he continued watering the seeds every day. While the neighbors
crops sprouted within weeks, his seeds had not shown any signs of sprouting, even after
months. Since he had decided this was his last chance, he never gave up. He continued
watering the seeds. Years passed by, but still nothing happened. Neighbors started
laughing and giving their own suggestions that he might have planted rotten seeds, or that
the seeds had died before they had gotten the chance to grow.
But the farmer didnt bother with their words and gave no ears to their suggestions. He
continued to haul water to the seeds. A couple more years passed. All of the other
farmers had started with their second crop, but his farmland was still empty land. As
time passed, the farmer started to doubt the seeds he planted. He started having negative
thoughts. Am I watering dead seeds? These seeds may not grow at all. Have all my
efforts gone to waste?
But there was small voice still saying, Keep going The farmer trusted that voice,
and again he continued to apply water to the seeds. Four long years passed, but still
there was no result. All his savings had been spent in supporting his family. Every
morning he used to put water on the seeds and sit on his farmland, looking at the spots
and thinking, The seeds may sprout now. Looking at this farmer, the neighbors stopped
laughing. They felt he had gone mad.
Another year passed. It had been five long years and not a single sprout came out of the
ground. All of his savings were gone, and his hope was too. One morning he felt no point
in waiting anymore, and as he had said before planting the seeds, that he would kill
himself if there was no result, he decided to do just that.
But on the same day, something miraculous happened. He came running and shouting in
the direction of his house. People thought that he had finally gone mad. He started crying
with joy. He took his whole family to the field and showed them the green sprouts
bursting out of the ground.
The farmer was dancing with joy. The neighbors who once were looking with pity, came
and asked him if it has taken five years to sprout, how much time would it take to grow
ten feet tall? Theres no point in farming this kind of bamboo, they told him.
But the farmer was so happy and excited that their words did not affect, nor bother him.
Within the next six weeks, the bamboo grew to be ninety feet tall. The whole village was
stunned, and everyone was amazed at what was happening. The seeds were a special
type of bamboo called Chinese bamboo. For five years the bamboo grew beneath the
surface, making its root strong so that it can support a height of eighty to ninety feet.
Like the farmer, each of us has that special seeds called goals. Once we start working,
we may or may not get immediate results, but one thing that is important is to make sure
that we continue the good work and be patient, just like the farmer.
According to recent studies, only 8% of people who set goals will achieve them. Why?
Whats so special about those 8%? What is it that they do differently from us that makes
them achievers?
Once in my workplace, a senior architect of my company came and asked me a question.
How will you solve a problem? I was shocked, and I asked him back, What kind of
problem? He answered, Any kind of problem. I was totally confused. Without
knowing what the problem is, how I can solve the problem? With that confusion, I asked
him back, What is the answer? How can we solve problems?
His answer was a mind opener for me. He said, Just divide the problem into smaller
pieces and start solving them one by one. This is the basic principle of Object Oriented
programming. His answer gave me clarity on why I had not been able to do the things
which I know I had to do. The other 92% of people who set their goals and are not able
to achieve them have the same guilty feeling. They know what to do, but somehow they
are failing, and the worst part is that they cant figure out the reason why.
When we were kids, we all had our own dreams that I will be the richest man, I will
fly am airplane, I will become like Pele, and so one. But our teachers told us to
think practical, think of the things you can achieve. By telling us things like that,
they re-programmed our mind to become an engineer, or a doctor, or an ordinary person.
Somewhere in our life though we read a motivational book or met a trainer who made us
believe that we could achieve all our dreams again. Dreams do come true. You might be
wondering how I know that you have read a book or came across a teacher or person
with positive thinking. You reading this book and sticking with it until the fourth chapter
automatically shows how much you want to achieve something great in your life.
The book or the trainer told us to think big. Your Goals should be so big that it should
frighten you. It should not allow you to sleep.
However, there is a small gap between dreaming and achieving big goals. I am not
asking you to stop dreaming. Actually, it is a very important part when it comes to
achieving our goals. But to achieve these big goals we need a lot of focused effort for a
long period of time. Our focus will always be interrupted by other things. It may be our
personal life problems or issues associated with our professional life which can deviate
our focus from the big goal. It ultimately shifts our thinking to Its not the right time,
or I will start this next month, and ends up pushing that goal to the next year, or in
dropping it permanently. Its not our mistake. The design of our mind is simply like that.
If it doesnt have a clear path or instructions to do an activity, then the mind tries to drop
the goal because its not seeing any kind of results to get out of it. So, when we start
towards the big goal and we dont know how to achieve it, and after a little effort trying
there is no result, we drop it.
Its not about how big a step you take. Its about how many
small steps you take every day.
Achieving our goal mainly depends on our belief system. Our belief system is like a
muscle; we have to work on it to make it stronger. It gets stronger and stronger when we
do stuff which we cant do, and by doing stuff which others thought we couldnt do. The
same muscle gets weaker when we fail and when we couldnt do the things which we
planned and thought could be done easily.
At the beginning of every year, and with great enthusiasm, we write a list of big goals
and start working on them from day one. With full energy we keep working on our goals
at the time when our belief muscles are the strongest. Since our belief is stronger, it will
continue working on these goals for the first and second week.
But somewhere at the end of the third week a small seed of doubt sets in. As we
discussed earlier, since our goals are big and we are yet to see any result after two
weeks of effort, our mind starts doubting the goals and our ability to achieve them. When
we allow doubt to set in, our belief muscles start losing their strength, and ultimately
those goals will be reluctantly moved to the following week or are even dropped
completely.
So this is what we have to do. No matter how big your goal is, all you need to do is to
take JUST ONE STEP towards your destination. Your goal might be writing a book,
running a marathon, opening your own company, or anything for that matter. At the end of
the day just ask yourself this one question: Have I taken that one step today? If yes,
then feel proud and go to bed, or if not, spend fifteen to thirty minutes to do something
about it before going to bed. Believe me, you will go to bed with the best feeling, and
the good news is that the feeling continues on to the next morning.
When we start taking things one step at a time towards the goal, we will start gaining
confidence that our goal can be easily achieved. We will start to build the momentum
that is required for a long run. Once the momentum is built, BOOM! Everything will
happen so fast that you will be astonished.
Its all about building the momentum like we saw in the farmers story. The bamboo
seeds were taking little steps beneath the surface to grow. They were trying to build the
momentum needed for the journey ahead. Once the momentum is built, the results we get
and the magic that happens will amaze everyone, including ourselves.
The only way to build momentum is by taking small steps every day towards what we
want to achieve. Whenever you complete that days task, or when you take that one step,
take a break and appreciate yourself. You are the best. You can achieve any big goal. No
goal is bigger than what you are capable of achieving, and appreciating ourselves is
another way to make our belief muscle strong. Why wait until others appreciate you?
You know you are the best, you are the masterpiece, so dont wait for others
appreciation.
There is a setback statement or thought that we need to get rid of in our mind. One big
thought in our mind is, Let me be perfect. Then I will do it.
From our childhood, everyone has told us to think before acting, to get yourself ready
before you take a step, dont rush, etc. We have been following these instructions
carefully and we are so stuck in this thinking that we forgot to take the next step, which is
implementation.
There was a survey carried out, the outcome of which revealed that people who have
more knowledge and qualifications earn less income, and that people with less
qualification earn more income. This is because the people with more qualification think
more before taking a step. They will be analyzing until that analysis becomes paralysis,
whereas people with less qualifications think less and try more. They may fail a couple
of time, but they are the ones who succeed later on. Its better to fail twice and succeed
than sitting around and analyzing throughout your life.
You dont have to see the whole stair case. Just take first step.
No company started with the perfect plan, but it doesnt mean to not think at all. Its just
that we dont get everything at the beginning. We have to take that first step towards
implementation, and when we proceed all will come our way, working together for our
good. (More on this will be discussed in later chapters.) The company that made it to
great heights never waited until they had the perfect plan. They started on a little idea,
and as they kept moving, their plan started to become more and more perfect.
From today, discard this statement. If I do, I will do perfectly, or else I wont do.
There is nothing called a perfect start. You have to start on a good note and keep up the
excellent pace until you come to the perfect end.
In 2013, I set a goal to complete a 10 Km marathon. Right from my childhood, the state
of my health had not been great. In my early years I was suffering from Asthma, which
kept me out of sports. It was a big challenge for me to complete the 10 Km, where in
reality I was not able to run 100 meters at a stretch. I started practicing, and all I had
was a month to do so. That was the very period I learnt about taking Just One step.
Running a 10 Km is a big goal, and my health condition at that time was not that good, so
my belief in my goal was low.
To tackle this problem I started following one step at a time. I fixed my goal at 10 km,
and then divided that into smaller pieces. The first thing I did was to plan the next
morning every night, and that I would run a little more than I ran yesterday.
Day 1: I started jogging, and I ran about half a kilometer before my body sent a message
of I cant take anymore. I stopped there and returned home by walking.
Day 2: With lot of body pain, I started running again. I was decided and determined to
always run a bit more than I had the previous day. You know how I felt? Like I had
already completed the 10 Km.
This continued for two weeks, and by the end of the second week I was able to run three
to four km non-stop. A fellow who could not run 100 meters was covering two to three
Km already at a stretch. This made me believe that I could do more. My belief system
was growing stronger and stronger.
Slowly, I had started building the momentum by taking small steps every day. Exactly
one week before the marathon, it was a Sunday. I thought that I would give my best and
see exactly how far I could run. I started running around 6:10 AM and kept on running
until I reach a situation where I couldnt take one more step. When I stopped and
checked how far I had covered, the result was shocking. I had ran continuously for fiftyfive minutes and covered seven Km! I wasnt discouraged with fact that I could not make
it to the 10 km mark, but I was already feeling like I had achieved something in life. One
week later I completed the 10 Km marathon in sixty-five minutes and ten seconds
without a single break. That was my biggest achievement to date. Until then I used to just
watch my friends play, but on that day I was watched and appreciated by thousands of
people who were cheering us on. I wont forget that moment in my life. This happened
by taking JUST ONE STEP.
I love u Rachu
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Action time:
I hope by now you have come up with a list of goals. Now its time to take those
goals and divide them into smaller parts.
Work wholeheartedly on one part of your goal at a time.
Appreciate yourself once you finish each part.
Try to do something every day to build that momentum.
Miracle moments
Whenever you finish one part and move towards others, your belief muscle will get
stronger.
You will start respecting yourself.
The confidence gained by taking that one step every day will be shown in all the
work you do, and the world will see you as a confident person.
Chapter 5:
Its all about ATTITUDE
We can start implementing the things we learnt in earlier chapters. We now have the
abundant energy, and at same time we know where we really have to apply that energy.
On many occasions we feel that we are doing everything right, but still the expected
results are not coming. For now, whenever you are in such a situation, then ASK the
triangle.
Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from
achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the
Just take a moment and think. Wherever we are in our life today, its because of our job
isnt it? We have a nice house to live in, even if its a rented house, and its because of
our job. If you are able to make lots of money from a business, then its because of our
employees. If your family is having some good times and your children are getting a
good education, its all because of your job or business.
If you are a student, then how thankful should you be towards your institution and
teachers? What youve learned from them is what you are going to use to develop
yourself, to get jobs, or start your own business.
Wait! Hold on! You do not know how horrible my company is. They dont recognize my
talent and wont pay me well!
There was a carpenter by the name of Chris who worked for a builder for several years.
One day, Chris looked at his life and made up his mind to retire from his job. He
approached his employer and told him about his plans to leave the job in order to live a
leisurely life with his wife and enjoy his lovely, extended family.
The employer was not happy to see his best worker go away and asked for a favor; if he
could build just one more house. Chris agreed and started working on his final project at
the company. Since it was his last project, he worked half-heartedly and he said goodbye
to working overtime.
He did not consider finding the best cement mixture, and also he did not include a
swimming pool in his last project. He did not use good quality wood for the doors and
window. The furniture design and quality was not good because he just wanted to finish
this final job and retire. He never bothered to put in the same amount of effort to
maintain the same quality as he had in his earlier projects.
The carpenter completed the whole project before the end date. He went to the builder
and said, I have finished the project. Now I will not be coming anymore. I want to
retire and spend time with family.
The builder replied, Thank you! You have done an awesome job for me for the last two
decades, and I am really sad to let go of such an extraordinary worker. For all the good
work you have done for this company, the last house you built is a gift for you and your
family. Please take the keys.
The carpenter was totally shocked and was feeling very bad because he knew that the
house he built was not the best. But now he and his family would live in that very house.
Isnt it the same with us also? We build our lives a day at a time, often putting less than
our best into the building. Then, with a shock, we realize we have to live in the house
we have built. If we could do it over we could have done it much differently, but we
cannot go back. We are the carpenter, and every day you hammer a nail, place a board,
or erect a wall.
Life is a do-it yourself project. Our attitude and the choices we make today will help
to build the house we live in tomorrow.
I am not asking you to work in a company where you never liked working, or to work
with people who never supported your business. If you do not like the company, if you
do not like the management or the system, then change the job or go out and start a
company. Show them how a company should operate. Hire the best people, give the best
salary, recognize their efforts, and make your company a better place to work. Or if you
love your job, love the company you work. Never have the wrong attitude towards your
job, the company, or the people you are working with.
When you have the wrong attitude, it goes deep into your mind that: I have a bad job. I
am in one of the worst places to work. I have the worst boss, etc. But if you continue to
carry this attitude, very soon it will enter your subconscious mind, and it will be a big
tragedy in the long run. Our subconscious mind is like Aladdins Genie. Whatever we
feed our subconscious mind, it will try to manifest in the real world, whether its good
or bad. Once we feed it the wrong things, then no matter how often we change our job,
we will still get the so-called worst job, or no matter how much harder we worked,
our efforts will not be recognized, or even how every talented employee we hire will be
a liability to the company.
So, from now on lets work on our attitude. Whatever the current position is in your
office, just have the attitude that you are in the best company, you have the best
employees working for you, you have the best team working with you, and that even the
smallest of effort is getting recognized.
When I heard about correcting our attitude, the first doubt in my mind was that if my
attitude was right, how would the boss who scolds everyone starts caring about me?
How would my workers suddenly start putting more effort into their work? Or how
would I get the best salary? The same questions might be there in your mind. Once our
attitude is right, situations will automatically come where a boss who was scolding for
every mistake starts ignoring your mistakes, or that person will be replaced by a better
manager.
But sometimes I feel if you have the:
BEST JOB
BEST MANAGER
BEST COMPANY
BEST SALARY
Then anyone can perform and become successful in life. Its the toughest time and
condition where only tough people stand and others retire. This is where the champions
are separated from the losers. This is where men are separated from boys.
So, from today, lets have the best attitude towards work. Let Monday be the holyday for
our work. Our co-workers and our employees are like our family. From tomorrow, start
going to work with the attitude I have the best job and I am working in the best
company. When people around you have no idea about how attitude works, they will
still be complaining about their job, boss, etc. Then you will try to explain to them what
you learnt from this chapter and how their attitude and thinking should be towards the
development of their company and their work.
The first time you explain it to them, expect a scolding from them. But with further
explanation from time to time, they will begin to understand how much better it is to
have a positive attitude towards their boss and company. This is the point where it will
be decided whether you will become great, or will continue being average.
First they ignore you. Then they laugh at you. Then they fight
you. Then you WIN.
-Mahatma Gandhi
If you are hardworking, you are not complete. If you have got the best knowledge, then
also you are not complete. What does this mean?
If we substitute A-1, B-2, C-3, and so on until Z-26,
Then:
H+A+R+D+W+O+R+K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11= 98%
K+N+O+W+L+E+D+G+E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5=96%
But with right knowledge and hard work, if we cultivate good attitude we have a 100%
chance of reaching the goal.
A+T+T+I+T+U+D+E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5=100%
Just take a moment and think. Can you maintain the same attitude in all areas of your life,
even if people laugh at you, or even if people fight with you? If the answer is a big
YES, then take a word from me that the golden period in your life has started. Its
because of your attitude that you will stand out of the group. Its because of your attitude
that every small step in your business will bring big results. Its because of your attitude
that the relationship with your co-worker, manger, or employees will improve.
But when I heard this, in my mind I thought, First, let my boss treat me well, and then I
will try to have a good attitude towards them. But later I realized that we wont get
sprouts before planting the seeds. First we have to plant the seeds, have a bit of
patience, and we will definitely get the sprouts of success.
Once a little boy went to a drug store. He reached for a soda carton and pulled it near
the telephone. He climbed on the carton so that he could reach the buttons of the phone
and started to punch in numbers. The storekeeper, who was observing this, listened to
boys conversation.
Boy: Lady, can you give me a job of cutting your lawn?
Woman (at the other end): I already have someone to cut my lawn.
Boy: I will cut your lawn for half the price of the person who cuts your lawn now.
Woman: I am very satisfied with the person who is presently cutting my lawn.
Boy: Lady, I will even sweep your curb and your sidewalks so that on Sunday you will
have the prettiest lawn.
Woman: No, thank you.
With a smile on his face, the little boy cuts the call. The store owner who was listening
to all this walked over to the boy and said, Son I like your attitude. I like your
positive spirit and would like to offer you a job.
The boy said, No. Thank you.
But you are really pleading for one, said the store owner.
No Sir, the boy replied, I was just checking on my performance at the job I already
have. I am the one who is working for that lady I was talking to.
The owner was amazed with the boys attitude
We cant wait for others appreciation. This is the time where we have to understand the
good work we are doing, appraise ourselves for doing such good job, and move on.
If we carry such an attitude and start moving, the way we treat the world changes. The
way we treat people changes. And finally, the way world treat us changes too. Dont
think that now that we have got the best attitude that our chances of getting our goals are
easier. There is still a problem: we have some enemies to deal with. Once we kill them,
then, and only then, can we achieve our goals more comfortably.
I love u Rachu
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Action time:
Tonight I want you to take your personal diary or a big sheet and start listing down
the things which you like about your job / business/ studies.
If you really dig down deep, you will find around six to seven points.
When I learnt about this, I had listed the below points:
I like my job because I have best co-workers.
I like my job because I have the best manager.
I like my job because I get an awesome salary.
I like my job because my commute to the office is easy.
I like my job because I have an awesome team to work with.
I like my job because I get good increment.
Always start your statement with I like my job or I like my business.
Miracle moments
1. When our attitude changes the way we see things changes:
You will start working with more enthusiasm.
You will start enjoying your work.
Your small shift in attitude will bring a huge difference in your performance.
More people will start to like you and support you in your work or business.
Ultimately people will start following you, and it will simultaneously increase your
income.
Chapter 6:
Kill Your ENEMIES
FEAR
FEAR is not real. The only place it exists is in our thoughts of the future. Its a product
of our imagination, causing us to fear that which is not present, or may not ever exist.
We always live in our fear of the future because of the things that happened in our past.
Because of this, we end up losing what we have in our present.
Every time we are afraid, its about the things that are yet to happen in the real world,
and 90% of the time it will not actually happen. Its our mind trying to create a situation
based on previous experiences. Ultimately, this will stop us from taking actions.
We are not scared of the dark,
but we are scared of whats in it.
We are not scared of heights,
but we are afraid of falling.
We are not scared of people,
but we are afraid of what they will think.
We are not afraid of trying again,
but we are afraid of getting hurt for the same reason.
Worrying
Worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives us something to do,
but it wont get us anywhere.
Worrying is like an extension of fear. Most of the time we worry about things that have
already happened, or about the things that have yet to happen
I dont know if I replied to my boss in the way he likes.
I dont know if I will take the right job.
I dont know if my decision was correct.
By worrying about every little thing in life, it has come to a point that if someone is cool
and calm and doesnt seems to worry about things, people concluded the person is
jobless, doing nothing worthwhile, or that he/she is not responsible.
Nowadays if people dont have anything to worry about in their life, they will start
worrying about society, about the country, or things that will keep them thinking
unnecessarily.
Who will change our politicians?
Where are we heading to in this country?
Why is there is an increase in terrorism?
Why are these guys not playing well?
questions pop up in your mind. Should we not think of society? Should we not care
about the people around us?
I am not telling you not to care about the people whom you read about in the newspaper
or watch on television, but my question is what difference are you bringing into their life
by worrying about them? The only thing we can do is to pray to God. God, please give
them the strength to face and overcome their challenges.
One of the players is not playing well, there is drastic increase in the crime rate, traffic
on the road is increasing every day, and my boss is not doing his work properly. 50-60%
of our worries are why others are not doing their work. In reality, we dont have any
control over those situations.
Most of us always worry of the bad things that have happened in our past. What
happened has already happened. We cant change the things that have happened in the
past. The only thing we can do is learn from them and use that experience to tackle our
current problems.
Once, two monks were returning to their home. It had rained heavily, and water had
blocked the roads in the village. At one place a beautiful young lady was stuck and was
unable to cross the road. The elder monk went up to her, lifted her up, helped her to
cross the road, and continued on his journey home.
The other monk was confused, and wondered, How can he touch the lady? As monks,
we are not to touch a woman. He walked to the elder monk and asked him, Sir, as a
monk we are not allowed to touch a woman, right?
The elder monk replied, Thats true brother.
Then how come you carried that woman to the other side of the road?
The elder monk replied, I dropped her on the other side, but you are still carrying her in
your thoughts.
Like the younger monk, we are all carrying the burden of things that have happened in the
past, or things which are not in our control, and keep worrying about them. By worrying
about them, we are losing lots of energy.
I am not telling to stop worrying, which is not practical. I am just asking you to reduce
the worrying, especially about things which are not in our control. It will help us to
conserve more energy, which can be utilized in doing other important work. We can stop
worrying by adopting points below.
Accept it: Yes, the kids are not listening to me. Accept it. My wife shouts at every
little thing. Accept it. My Boss doesnt appreciate me. Accept it. Politicians are
not doing what they promised. Thats fine, accept it. Once you have accepted the
situations, now think of what else you can do. How can you handle the kids so they
will listen to you? What extra effort can you put in place to make your wife
understand you? And so on.
Its not in your control: Yes, Its not in our control how our boss should behave.
Its not in our control if the traffic in the city is increasing. Its not in our control
which shot Sachin should play. Its not in our control to stop crime. So lets not
worry about the things which are not in our control, work on the things which are
in our control, and try to do them in the best possible way.
When Barack Obama was young, he would have definitely seen the problems around
him. But he did not sit around worrying about the problems. At that moment, all the
problems were not in his control. So instead of worrying and wondering why these
things were happening, he just worked on the things which were in his control. He
worked in such a way that today he now has control of all the problems in our society.
Similarly, let us work on the things which are in our control and focus on our present.
Lets not waste the best time and energy of our life on things far beyond our control. Let
us work to increase the areas where we have influence.
Gossiping
If gossip were food, many people would be overweight.
Gossip is idle talk or rumor, especially about the personal and private life of others. On
average, an individual gossips for about thirty to forty minutes a day. Thats not the end.
An extra twenty minutes will be wasted on thinking about what to gossip. Its said that
gossiping is worse than blackmailing. In blackmailing, the black mailer gives the victim
a chance to silence him, but gossiping exposes the secret without warning.
Gossiping about another person does not show what kind of person he/she is, but
actually shows what kind of person we are. Most of the time gossip is negative, and if
we are focusing on the negative things in another person, it means that we are training
our mind on how to find negative things in others.
Now that weve understood that gossiping is like training of our mind in a negative
manner, we need to learn how to avoid it. Gossip happens mostly between two people. It
is possible to stop people around us from engaging us in gossip, but we also have roles
to play.
If we observe Buddhas teaching, he has addressed this problem in a superb way. If you
have to speak, always ask yourself:
Is it true?
Is it necessary?
Is it kind?
First and foremost, avoid talking about others when they are not with you. By doing this,
we will stop 90% of gossip.
Secondly, when another person comes to us telling us about a third person, ask them the
same three questions
Is it 100% true?
Is it necessary?
Is it good or bad?
This method is also referred to as the triple filter technique. If we pushed these questions
to the other person, then he/she will not continue the discussion. One warning though is
that if we follow this method, in the beginning people might not like your way. They may
even stop talking to you temporarily, and you may become a hot topic for discussion
yourself.
Once they stop talking to you, they start talking about you.
Let others talk about us. Lets not involve ourselves in talking negatively about others.
Great minds discuss ideas, average mind discuss events, and small mind discuss people.
At the same time, we will start thinking of our great ideas and goals and take action to
achieve them.
Action time:
Apply the triple filter technique whenever someone tells negatives about a third
person.
There is no point in worrying, as the results will be one of four:
As expected.
Little more than expected.
Little less than expected.
Opposite of our expectations.
By understanding the outcome of any situation, fear about failure will be reduced.
This helps us to take required actions.
Increase your area of influence by working on things which are in your control.
Miracle moments
With less worries, more energy will be utilized on important tasks.
We will be more confident, as we have conquered the fear of failure.
Success rates will increase since we are giving our best in any work by focusing on
process and not on results.
Your health will improve, as there will be less stress and worry.
Chapter 7:
Put in Something EXTRA
The Difference between ordinary and extra-ordinary is just extra. Many of us who are
ordinary just have to do that extra to become extra-ordinary. With all the energy we
are saving by using the techniques weve learnt in the last chapters, it will be very easy
to put that extra in all our work.
So, what do you mean by giving extra?
Let us consider that I am making a product and it costs around $1,000. If I have an
intention of giving extra, then I will make sure that the person who buys the product will
receive more than the price he pays for it.
Heres another example. Lets assume Im a trainer who trains or teaches people how to
be successful, how to be happy, and how to achieve their goals happily and peacefully. If
I am charging $500 for my session, then I have to train my participants in such a way that
by using the technique I taught them, they should be able to double their income, double
their happiness, and achieve their goals two times faster than others.
It means I have to give more than what I have taken from them. Giving extra can be by
means of giving follow up classes, or by motivating them every week.
In case of a product, we can give extra by providing a unique type of service which no
one else gives, or it can be extra in how we treat our clients or customers.
Many years ago an elderly lady was strolling through a Pittsburgh department store,
obviously killing time. She used to come every day just to look at the things, and then she
would leave the store without buying or selling anything. At first, people used to ask her,
Madam, how can we help you? She used to reply with, I am just killing time. Within
a few days the workers at the department store spotted her as an idle looker who had
no intention of buying. They made it a point of looking in the other direction when she
stopped at their counters.
One fine day, as always, the lady came to the department store when it started raining
heavily. On the same day a young, enthusiastic man had joined the store. While visiting
counter to counter, the lady came to the counter that was attended by the young man, who
bowed politely and asked if he might help her. No, she replied. I am just killing time
and waiting for the rain to stop so I can go home. The boy replied with a smile, Very
well madam. May I bring out a chair for you?
And he brought it without waiting for her answer. After the rain stopped, the young man
took the lady by the arm and escorted her to the street before he bade her goodbye. As
she left, she asked him for his card.
Several months later the owner of the store received a letter, asking for the young man to
be sent to Scotland to take an order for the furnishing of a home. The owner of the store
wrote back that he was sorry, but the young man did not work for the home furnishing
department. However, he explained that he would be glad to send an experienced man
to do his job.
Back came the reply that no one would do except for this particular young man. The
letter was signed by Andrew Carnegie, and the house he wanted furnished was the Skibo
Castle in Scotland. The elderly lady was Mr. Carnegies mother. The young man was
sent to Scotland and received an order for several hundred thousand dollars worth of
household furnishings. He later went on to become the owner of the store.
The young man could have neglected the lady when she told him she was just killing
time, but instead he went one step ahead and treated her as his million dollar client. That
one step transformed his life completely. Like the young man, we should always try to
give something extra in any work we do.
The illiterate of 21st century will not be those who cannot read
and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and re-learn.
If we ask the people who have achieved great height what the master secret of their
success is, the answer will be learning new things and implementing them as early as
possible. Yes, some of us are learning new things, but we forget to implement them.
Implementation is as important as learning, because its the applied knowledge which
gives us the ultimate result.
had many uncertainties, such as our exam time. This is when we used to put in long hours
of study and avoid all forms of distraction. That time I used to have unpleasant thoughts
as to when I would finally be done with these exams.
In reality, those ten to fifteen days were when we put in a little extra effort, when we
went the extra mile from our normal routines, and which indeed took us to the next grade.
We might have felt uncomfortable during those periods, but those were the periods that
aided us in crossing every limit, broke all the fences set up by our mind, and to me, those
are moments when we actually stepped out of our comfort zones.
And again, after graduation when we finished all our exams and we got a job, we were
not comfortable during the initial days. We struggled, but we learned a lot of things.
Then, slowly, we started adapting, feeling comfortable in our work, and from there we
entered a zone where we had less risk and uncertainty. Now that most of us have reached
a stage where we dont have to take risks, our life is moving very slowly when
compared to the college days where we used to have to step out of our comfort zone.
happen is that I will be rejected by the company, but there are hundreds of other
companies there to give the same job as well.
It has never come to a state where someone tried new things, his wife and kids left him
for it, and his government gave an order to kill that person. So it is fine if we lose some
money, and it is not bad if we fail a couple of times. Einstein once said, If we are not
failing, then we are not trying anything new. Without trying anything new, we cannot
stand out of the group, and it will be quite impossible to achieve our dreams. Yes, being
in our comfort zone we may get three square meals and a house to live in. But if we are
dreaming anything bigger, than we have to step out of our comfort zone.
The second reason why we are not able to step out of our comfort zone is, What will
others say if I fail?
We have to understand one very important thing: that people in the society will always
have something to say about us. If we fail, they will say, I told you earlier, but you
turned deaf ears, or they will start looking for our mistakes and they will ensure we
dont try again. If we succeed, instead of appreciating our efforts, they will say, He was
just lucky, or, It was a fluke win. People are there to talk, and we cant stop them
from talking about us.
lets not waste time and effort on people who dont understand us.
Now, once we start moving out of our comfort zone the real magic starts. Anything we
do to stretch ourselves out of our comfort zone will ultimately produce results, and
enabling us to take bigger calculated risk.
The lesser the risk, the less the profit. The bigger the risk, the
bigger the profit.
Everyone has big dreams of a beautiful mansion, car, company, etc., but no one is ready
to leave his or her comfort zone. Since we now have the understanding of how to come
out of it, things will be like a game to us. If we observe carefully, we see that all our
dreams and goals are not within our comfort zone. Its here, outside our comfort, that our
creativity, our imagination, and our special skills manifest. Many people have such
heights that they can fulfil any of their dreams, and that can contribute tangible things to
their society and the people around them.
Action time:
Start small. Decide on the area of your life that you will give something extra to for
the next month. Then, slowly make it a habit and let it become a part of your life.
Start improving your skills by continuously learning in your field.
Take small steps to come out of your comfort zone. Do something positive and
different that you have never done before which makes you quite uncomfortable.
Miracle moments
Life will no longer be boring. It will be more happening and adventurous.
People will start recognizing your work once you start doing something extra.
The chances of achieving your dreams double as you have started moving out of
your comfort zone.
Chapter 8:
Tackle Your TONGUE
What is food?
In a common mans language, food is the fuel to the so called most sophisticated machine
called the HUMAN BODY. So, strictly speaking, the main job of fuel is to provide
energy to the machine to do its work. In reality though, its our food habits that are
causing our system to break down now and then.
Why is this happening? The food which has to help us along in carrying out our day to
day activities slows us down, or sometimes brings us to a standstill. One of the reasons
behind this is that most of us are not eating to satisfy our hunger, which means that we
are not eating to fill our stomach, but we are eating to satisfy our emotional hunger.
Some of us concentrate more on the taste of the food rather than on the nutritional content
of it. According to research, there are less people who are dying from hunger than
people who are dying from obesity and other related diseases.
So what to eat?
Most of us dont know what we eat, and we continue eating food which is good in taste,
but our focus should be on food with high nutritional value. Whenever we have to decide
on what kind of food to eat, the first question that comes to our mind is should we be
vegetarian, or non-vegetarian.
Basically, why do we eat food? We eat food to get the energy required to perform our
day to day activities. Food also provides essential nutrients for body growth, and
maintenance to keep the body in a healthy state.
To digest any food we eat, some amount of energy is spent on the digestion process, and
the actual difference exists here. Assuming the food we eat is light food with more green
vegetables, then the energy needed to digest the food will be less than the energy
released, so we get some energy from the food. If the food is spicier and heavy, then the
energy required in digesting that food will be more than the energy released from the
food.
Let us understand this with numbers. Assume food gives 1,000 calories to our body after
digestion. If the consumed food is light and healthy food, then around 400 calories will
be spent on its digestion.
When to eat?
In our school days we all learnt:
get up early in the morning after this, we will still be feeling tired and sluggish.
So our breakfast should be heavy? Yes. It will be a bit different in the beginning. We may
feel sleepy after a heavy breakfast, but our body will adjust to it very soon and we will
have energy at the start of the day. By eating lightly in the night, we are then giving
enough rest to our body and this in turn will help us to get up early in the morning.
Food which contains sugar or any kind of sweet should be consumed before four PM so
that we can make sure it is digested completely before we go to bed. This is because any
food with sugar content eaten during the night time will accumulate as fat. Take green
food at night so that it can be digested easily, and make sure that the dinner is eaten two
hours before we go to bed.
How to eat?
According to some research, it takes fifteen to twenty minutes before our brains receive
the signal from the stomach that it is full. But sometimes when we are late to the office
we eat breakfast as quickly as possible. We eat our food so mechanically that we dont
know how much we ate, and sometimes what we ate. When we are less busy we eat in
front of TV, or the computer, or with the mobile in one hand.
Because of such incorrect habits, we always end up eating more food than is required to
satisfy our hunger since we would have eaten a lot more before the signal reaches from
the stomach to the brain.
In our school days we learned how much we should eat. We also learned how to eat, but
unfortunately we left all those ideas there because they were simple and easy.
We all know that we have to chew our food for at least twenty-five to thirty times
because 30% of digestion happens with the help of saliva. If we start chewing twentyfive to thirty times, the speed of consuming food reduces.
30% of food gets digested in the mouth.
We will be aware of how much, and what we have eaten.
The stomach has enough time to send the signal to the mind that its full.
So, by chewing our food properly, we are tackling one of the biggest problems in the
world: obesity.
In our mind we think that we knew all this already, so why is he saying it again? For that,
my question is that we know many things about what we should do, but are we doing
them? If yes, then pat yourself on the back. If not, start them now.
Action time:
Increase the amount of live food in your diet.
Avoid spicy and heavy food which absorb energy from our body.
Eat like a king in the morning.
Eat like a prince in the afternoon.
Eat like a beggar in the night.
Food which contains more sugar should be eaten before four PM.
Make a habit of chewing food twenty-five to thirty times
Find a convenient way that will make you chew the food properly.
Miracle moments
You will have energy throughout the day.
Since we are eating light food in the night, it will be very easy to get up early in the
morning.
Since we have introduced a lot of nutrients in our diet, our body will feel more
energetic. You will start feeling light from the inside.
By chewing food a certain number of times, we are helping our digestive system,
which in turn helps us keep our weight in check.
If you follow the king, prince, beggar method and chew your food properly, drastic
change in our weight will be noticed within three to four months.
Chapter 9:
Flourish with Your FAMILY
Whenever I think of family, a conversation from the Iron man movie strikes me. When
Tony Stark, the person who become Iron man, was kidnapped by terrorists, he met a
scientist there who was helping Tony Stark to make some weapon for terrorist.
Tony stark: You got a family?
Yinsen [scientist]: Yes, and I will see them when I leave here. And you Stark?
Tony stark: No.
Yinsen: So, you are the man who has everything and nothing.
Yes! If we achieve everything in the world, if we get all the money we need, all the
success and fame, but we dont have a family to share that happiness with, then we are
still on the losing side.
Today there are many millionaires who are ready to sacrifice all their fame, all their
money, if someone can get them their family back, because they sacrificed their family
and friends in the process of becoming successful.
One day a father was doing some work and his son asked, Dad, may I ask you a
question?
The father replied, Yeah, sure. What is it?
Dad, how much do you make an hour? the son asked.
The father got a bit upset and said, That is none of your business. Why would you ask
such a thing?
I just want to know. Please tell me how much you make an hour?
I make 500 per hour, the father said.
Oh! the son said. Dad, may I please borrow 300?
The father furiously said, If the only reason you asked about my pay is to borrow some
money to buy a silly toy or any other non-sense junk, then go to your room. Think about
why you are being so selfish. I work hard every day son, and I do not like this childish
behavior.
The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door. The man sat down and was
even angrier about the little boys quest. How dare he ask such a question to get some
money?
An hour later the man calmed down and started thinking. May-be there is something he
really needed to buy with that 300, and he really doesnt ask for money often. The
man went to the door of the boys room and opened it, asking.
Are you asleep, son?
No daddy, I am awake, the son replied.
I have been thinking, the father said. Maybe I was too hard on you. Here is your
300.
Oh! Thank you daddy, the boy said with a big smile.
Then, reaching under the pillow, he pulled some crumpled up notes. The father saw that
he already had some money, and he was getting angry again.
Why do you want money if you already had some? the father asked his son.
Because I didnt have enough, but now I do, the son replied. Daddy, I have 500 now.
Can I buy an hour of your time? Please come home early tomorrow. I would like to have
dinner with you.
The father was dumbstruck.
We all are working so hard that we dont even remember when we last spent quality
time with our family. Unfortunately, if we die today, the company we are working for
could easily replace us in no time. But what about our family to whom we matter the
most?
We all have our excuses. We have common excuses, such as, All this hard labor I am
engaging myself in is for my family, for my kids.
Your family needs all the wealth you earn, but more than that, they also need some
quality time to be spent with them. To our children, we are super heroes. They always
want us around. For your spouse, you are the reason of their happiness, and for your
parents, you are the stars of their life. Your family just needs half an hour of quality time.
If you are ready to give that half an hour to your family, then the whole environment of
understanding, and even start supporting us in our professional life. Once they give us
this support, we will have peace of mind, we will get power, and we will know that our
mind works at its best when there is calm. So, once we have peace and power in the
inside world, we will automatically achieve progress in the outside world.
Nowadays we spend a whole lot of time convincing our family members of why I am
doing this, and why they should endure, leading to misunderstanding, worrying, and
Why the hell do you not understand? At the end of the day, the energy from which we
have to achieve and make our world better is lost in small fights and misunderstandings
at home.
After twenty-one years of marriage, a lady wanted her husband to take another woman
out for dinner and to watch a movie. She said, I love you, but I know this other woman
loves you and would love to spend some time with you.
The other woman that the lady wanted her husband to take out was her husbands mother,
who had been with him for the last nineteen years, but the demands and commitment of
his work life had made it impossible to even visit her occasionally. The husband called
his mother and invited her for movie and dinner. Suddenly the mother asked, Whats
wrong? Are you alright?
His mother was the type of woman who suspected that a late call in the night or surprise
invitation was a sign of bad news. So he responded politely, Just two of us.
She thought about it for a moment, and then said, I would like that very much.
That Friday after work he drove over to pick her up. He was a bit nervous. When he
arrived at her house, he noticed that she was also nervous. She waited near the door
with her coat on. She had curled her hair and wore the dress she wore to celebrate her
last wedding anniversary. She smiled, and her face was as radiant as an angels.
I told my friends that I am going out with my son and they were impressed, she said.
They went to a nice restaurant. His mother took his arm as if she was his first lady. After
they took their seats, he started reading the menu, but her eyes could only read large
print. After a minute, his mom was looking and staring at him. He lifted his eyes from the
menu and looked at her. A nostalgic smile was on her lips. It was I who used to read the
menu when you were small, she said.
Then this time you relax and let me return the favor, her son responded.
During the dinner they had an agreeable conversation. Nothing extraordinary, but
catching up on recent events of each others lives. They talked so much that they missed
their movie. As they arrived back at her place, she said, I will go out with you again,
but only if you allow me to invite you. He agreed.
After a few days, his mother died of a massive heart attack. It happened so suddenly that
he didnt have a chance to do anything for her. Sometime later he received an envelope
with a copy of a restaurant receipt from the same place where he and his mom had dined.
An attached note said, I paid this bill in advance. I wasnt sure that I could be there, but
nevertheless, I paid for two plates. One for you, and another for your wife. You will
never know what that night meant to me. I Love you son.
At that time, he learnt the importance of saying I LOVE YOU, and to giving our loved
ones the time they deserve. Nothing in life is more important than your family. Give them
the time they deserve because this cannot be put off until some other time.
Todays families are very busy, usually with both parents working, but making some time
for the family is very important. Spending some quality time with them is very crucial,
but spending time doesnt include the time you watch T.V together, or time spent with
smart phones in everyones hand. Spending quality time with family members might be a
small walk, or sitting and discussing with direct eye contact.
By doing this we and our family receive huge benefit, such as:
Spending time and engaging in activities where all the family members are involved
will increase emotional bonding with each other, which in turn will increase
understanding between each other.
Children who spend time interacting with parents will perform well in academics.
Teenagers who are actively involved in family matters and spend time with family
tend to have less behavioral problem.
Parents are super heroes to their children. The more the time you spend with them,
the more the chances are that they will follow in your footsteps.
Adults who spend more time with their family are reportedly less prone to diseases
that are caused by stress.
I love u Rachu
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Action time:
It is still running in some of our heads. Boss! You dont know anything about my
family! Whether your family supports you or not, just start spending fifteen to
twenty minutes a day with them. In the beginning there wont be support, but in the
span of fifteen days, family members will start supporting you.
Give some special importance to your spouse. Make them feel special. Treat them
like a queen/king. As you do, address them and be more devoted in giving them
your time and space.
Talk to your children and ask them, How was your day? In the beginning the
response from them may not be good. However, within a week they will start
sharing things with you. Relate well with your kids and let there be a cordial
relationship between you.
Miracle moments
More understanding and less misunderstanding.
Developing a strong bond between family members.
Whenever big/small problems come, family members will come to help and support
you in all aspects.
You will become a good role model for your family members.
Chapter 10:
Its Just The BEGINING
What has happened to this guy? Weve reached the last chapter and he has named it as if
it is Just the Beginning.
This thought might have come into your mind. If you observe carefully, our journey of
winning our day and conquering it starts at the end of this chapter.
You might have understood everything from first the first nine chapters, but the master
secret is that you will conquer your day if you are ready to become a DONKEY.
What! Donkey?
Yes!
A farmer in a village had a donkey. The donkey was very loyal to its owner and helped
him in most of his work for ten years.
One day while coming from the field, the donkey fell into a well. The animal cried
piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do.
Finally, he decided that the donkey has grown old anyway, and that there was no point in
putting in the effort to bring it up. Lets bury it there and forget about it, he thought.
So, the farmer called his neighbors and asked for their help to bury the donkey alive.
They all started to put mud in the well. At first donkey was shocked. I have helped my
owner so much all these years, and instead of helping me to get out, he is trying to
bury me alive. It started to cry loudly.
But suddenly something struck the donkey. Each time people put mud on the donkey, it
shook the mud off its body and took a step up on the mud. Slowly, each time they poured
in the mud, the donkey shook it off and stepped up on the mud. Doing the same thing for
some time, the donkey finally stepped up over the edge of the well. The farmer and
neighbors were amazed.
After reading through this whole book, we will start planning our days with full
enthusiasm, know what exercises to do in the morning, how to sharpen your axe, how to
spend some quality time with our family, and then we will start implementing it, thinking,
Yes! I have the formula that will transform my life to a different level! On day one,
everything goes perfectly according to our plan and we feel superb. Day two also goes
smoothly as per plan and we will feel awesome. But on the third day (perhaps not
exactly on day three, but very soon), your boss asks you to stay late at the office because
some important work has to be completed that day. So you decided to stay back and
complete the work. By the time you finished at work and got home, it was around two in
the morning. Before you go to bed you are already thinking, How will I get up early in
the morning? So you skipped the early morning jogging. When it was time to meditate,
again your mind pitched in and said, Since you missed jogging, I guess I cannot
meditate, or, I cannot go deeper into meditation. Let me do it tomorrow.
Like this, somedays we wont follow the routine. Some days we follow it, and this
continues for a month. But after a month, if we are not very careful, our plans will be
thwarted and we will be back to our normal, regular lives.
idea to build a spectacular bridge connecting New York with Long Island. However,
bridge building experts thought that this was an impossible feat and told Roebling to
forget the idea. It just cannot be done. It is not practical. It had never been done
before.
Roebling could not ignore the vision he had in his mind of this bridge. He thought about
it all the time, and he knew deep in his heart that it could be done. He just had to share
his dream with someone else. After much discussion and perseverance, he managed to
convince his son Washington that the bridge could be built.
Working for the first time, the father and son developed concepts of how this could be
overcome. With great excitement and inspiration, they hired a crew and began to build
their dream bridge.
The project started well, but when it was only a few months underway a tragic accident
on the site took the life of John Roebling. Washington was also injured, and was left with
a certain amount of brain damage that resulted in him no longer being able to speak or
walk.
We told them so, Crazy men and their dreams, Its foolish to chase wild visions.
Everyone had a negative comment to make, and it was felt that the projects should be
scrapped since the Roeblings were the only ones who knew how the bridge could be
built.
In spite of his handicap, Washington was never discouraged. He still had a burning
desire to complete the bridge, and his mind was still as sharp as ever. He tried to inspire
and pass on his enthusiasm to some of his friends, but they were too daunted by the task.
As he lay in his hospital room bed, an idea hit him. All he could do was to move one
finger, and he decided to make the best out of it. By doing this, he slowly developed a
code of communication with his wife.
He touched his wifes arm with that finger, indicating to her that he wanted her to call the
engineers again. Then he used the same method of tapping her arm to tell the engineers
what to do. It seemed foolish, but the project was soon underway again.
For fifteen years Washington tapped out his instruction with his finger on his wifes arm
until the bridge was finally completed. Today, the spectacular Brooklyn Bridge stands in
all its glory as a tribute to the triumph of one mans indomitable spirit, and his
determination not to be defeated by circumstance.
Like John and Washington, we face obstacles in our day to day life. If we get that attitude
of continuing what we have started, even after many obstacles appear in our way, then
success will be ours.
After reading everything and giving our best every time, sometimes life brings us some
difficult challenges or situations that we have never faced before, or it may be above our
maturity level. We may succeed sometime, and other times we may fail. So, what do we
have to do so that we can keep going?
Accept It
Everything will not go according to our plan every time, and there are some times where
we will have to bend.
Assume that you have read this book completely and you are so inspired by it that you
started implementing the steps one by one like getting up early, doing meditation, giving
extra at the workplace, etc. All of a sudden your boss calls you to his office and shouts
at you for not completing work. Unfortunately, that was the extra work you had taken on
after your routine work. You could not say anything to your boss. You came out frustrated
and started thinking that all this happened because I thought it was good for me to give
some extra contribution from my side, that it would help my boss, but it only ended up
getting a bad scolding from him.
Sometimes life gives us such situations to test whether we are doing all these things for
ourselves, for the sake of getting a good name in front of the manager, or simply for
getting a pay hike. People who do it for the sake of getting a good name/pay hike will
drop such attitude after facing a situation like this. But for people who really cultivate
such attitudes for themselves, they will keep on continuing in any situation.
So there is no point in getting frustrated that these guys will not allow me to do anything.
Instead, accept it. This might be one of the tests to check if you are only doing it for
yourself.
Forgiving Yourself
Always remember that you are not a person who fails in everything. Everyone will fail
in one thing or another. Remember though that there is a big difference between a loser,
and a person who lost one game. A loser is one who lost in a game and did not give it
another try, but a person who lost in one game has every chance to win the next game
because he has not decided to quit, he has decided to go on.
So whenever you couldnt follow the route you prepared for one or two days, dont feel
guilty. You havent done anything wrong. You are not a loser. You have every chances to
start again. So, whenever you fail to follow something, become the donkey. Shake it off,
and start again.
This perspective has helped me to see that there is no way to happiness. Happiness is
the way. So enjoy every moment you have, and enjoy it more because you got a chance to
share it with someone special.
Remember that time waits for no one. So stop waiting:
Until you finish school.
Until you lose ten kilos.
Until you gain ten kilos.
Until you have a perfect partner.
Until you get a job.
Until you have kids.
Until Friday night.
Until Sunday morning.
Until you have a new car.
Until you retire.
Until you die.
Until you are born again.
After the completion of this book, we know that we will fail in a couple of places. Its
not that we will be perfect, but now we know what we have to do if we fail in anything,
or in any part of our life.
As I told earlier, do not wait until you get results from what youve learnt. From here on
out, start being happy and enjoy the process of implementing the things you have learnt
from this book. If you are implementing the things you learned in this book and you are
still becoming more depressed and sad, then I personally insist for you to not follow
whatever has been said. All the things said in this book are said with the whole and sole
reason of improving happiness and peace in your life.
Action time:
Become the donkey. Many obstacles will come our way. Do not let it not stop us
from following what we have learnt.
Accept that everything might not go according to our plan.
Forgive yourself and watch out for your circle.
Let happiness be the journey, not a destination.
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Miracle moments
Indirectly you will develop a Never give up attitude.
You will start finding happiness in each and every step of your life.
Since you are in touch with people who also want to achieve, you will be on track
throughout your life.
The articles posted on our blog will remind us of the main reason why we started
with this book.
I love u Rachu
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Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach a man to
fish and you feed him for a lifetime.
I personally feel that the only way we can help another person is by giving education.
Education alone has the power to take a Human being to Being human. So, if you feel
that the knowledge shared in the book is useful to any of your family member or friends,
then give a small description about the book, what the things are that you liked in the
book, and redirect them to our website www.howtowinyourday.com.
Also, please post your review from where you bought the book. It will help others to
decide to buy this book, and also help us to extend this knowledge to more people. If you
have any suggestions, please send any e-mails to [email protected]
We will meet you again very soon with the next edition of How To Win Your Day.
I love u Rachu
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