Boy: Why? Girl: You've invaded my privacy. Boy: How so?

Girl: You're in my thoughts, my dreams, my hopes, even my diary. You tiptoe into my mind all the time. Boy: So, you kind of love me, huh?

Posts That You May Like: Girl: I'm going to kill you.

Daisy: Mom, why did you name me Daisy? Mom: A dasiy fell on your head when you were born(: Rose: Mom, why did you name me Rose? Mom: a Rose fell on your head(: Cinderblock: BJLASBCFDLKNM LAHHHNBLALALJSJ Mom: Shut up Cinderblock!

hi. remember me? you used to smile when you saw me, hug me for no reason, talk to me without any conditions and love me for who i was. i miss that.

Teacher: Can you see God? Class: No. Teacher: Can you touch God? Class: No. Teacher: Then there isn't a God! Student: Sir, can you see your brain? Teacher: No. Student: Can you touch your brain? Teacher: No. Student: Oh ok so you have no brain?

-homeworkfreshman: i need to finish this tonight!! sophmore: i'll do it tommorrow for sure. junior: yeah..i'll do it.. senior: psht i ain't doin' this crap.

A good friend takes you to Walmart to buy a pregnancy test, a best friend is standing outside of the bathroom door screaming,"NAME IT AFTER MEE!!"

9th Grade: "I don't want to be in high school." 10th Grade: "I miss freshmen year." 11th Grade: "Yes! We're seniors next year." 12th Grade: "We're seniors? Man where did the time go?" I'm a teenage girl,my bff Becky just texted me saying she kissed Johny...thats a problem because...i like Johny.now,im emotionally compromising.woopsies..I'm all like 'omg, Becky's not even hot!'

Boy: I know what we should be for Halloween. Girl: What? Boy: I'll be Bruno Mars and you should be Just the Way You Are

When I`m older... and my little girl asks me who my first love was I don`t want to have to pull out the old photo album. I want to be able to point across the room and say: "he is sitting right over there''

FIRE ALARM: 6th Grade: OH MY GOD WHAT DO WE DOOO?! 7th Grade: Is it really on fire O__O? 8th Grade: Im taking this...and this and this... 9th Grade: PERFECT TIMING NO TEST

I hate it when you can't stop thinking about that one person...and deep down inside you know they probably haven't thought about you once...

TODAY! 11th Grade:Let it Burn! 12th Graders: Yeah i started that...

Guy: What's your favorite holiday? Girl: Valentine's Day, you? Guy: Halloween Girl: Why's that? Guy: Cause it's the only time of year where i can be your Superman.

PUSHING SENIORS INTO WALLS, BREAKING ALL THE JUNIORS JAWS, SOPHOMORES SCREAMING HOLY SHIT, CAUSE 2014 RUNS THIS BITCH

Next time i'm chewing gum and a teacher catches me & askes, "are you chewing gum?". i'ma respond, "nope, i'm fighting cavities." :P

When your girlfriend has Taylor Swift lyrics as her status, you know you've either done something very right or something very wrong

i may be a girl, i may wear make up and be girlie, but when it all comes down to it, i'd rather chug a beer with the guys than deal with drama with the girls.

Most akward moment is when your walking down the hall and someone is walking towards you. In your mind your screaming"where do i look. Where do i look"

"you wanna hang out""nahh man hanging out with my girl""what happened yo bros before hoes""i still fallow that she just isnt a hoe"

This boy in my class said "girls are dumb at sports". I said "NO WAY!". He said "Prove it to me". I said "I WILL! If I get 50 likes on this comment on facebook then girls are NOT dumb at sports by the 12/12/10

A friend calms you down but a best friend

If McDonalds sold hot dogs, could you, with a straight face, order a McWeiner...and tell them to supersize

skips next to you with a baseball bat singing "someones going to get it!"

it?

*kid at a party* -his phone ringsSHUT UP! ITS MY MOM!... Hi mom." -random kid in background- DUDE, PUT YOUR PANTS BACK ON!

A real boyfriend wants a cuddle more than a kiss. A kiss more then making out. Making out more than sex. But theres one thing that he should want to do more than all of those. Change your last name...

I don't get jealous when I see my EX with someone else because my Mother always told me to give my old toys to the less fortunate.

While Scooby Doo & Shaggy were eating & Velma was failing at life; Fred and Daphne were definitely hooking up. Let's be real

I got pulled over today, the Deputy walked up and said " PAPERS" and I yelled "SCISSORS I WIN!" he made me get out of my car and do a bunch of tests.

"You haven't done anything all day!""No mom, I got up at 6AM to go to school, took 3 tests, ran 2 miles, did 2 pages of math, wrote 3 paragraphs on world history, walked home from school in 98 degree weather, and finished my homework."

guy: why are you cutting your hair? girl: cuz, if I cut it in half, it grows even longer.. guy: REALLY? is that true? girl: yeahh..? 10 minutes later.. Paramedics Doctor: Now, explain to me again why you tried cutting your dick in half?

R.O.F.L.U.S.J.O.M.A.M.M.S.R.O.F.L.B.T.I.D.I.A.C.I.A Rolling on the floor laughing until someone jump on me a makes me stop rolling on the floor laughing but then I do it again cuz it's awesome

What bra sizes really mean: A- anorexic B- bigger than a tween's C- can't complain D- dang DD- double dang E- enormous F- fake G- get a reduction H- HELP i fell and can't

If someone throws a skittle at me and says "Taste the Rainbow!" I'm gonna throw an M&M at them and say "I'm not Afraid!

get up!!!

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"I didn't do it" ... "Then why are you laughing?" ... "Cause, whoever did it is a freaking genius."
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Posts of The Day

Wouldn't life be perfect if sweatpants were sexy, Monday mornings were fun, junk food was healthy, guys weren't confusing, and nothing was regrettable.

I lived in 01/01/01, 02/02/02, 03/03/03, 04/04/04, 05/05/05, 06/06/06, 07/07/07,08/08/08,09/09/09, 10/10/10!!!

"You haven't done anything all day!""No mom, I got up at 6AM to go to school, took 3 tests, ran 2 miles, did 2 pages of math, wrote 3 paragraphs on world history, walked home from school in 98 degree weather, and finished my homework."

Guys have friends that are girls cause it gives them someone to talk about their feelings with. Girls have friends that are guys cause there is soooooooo much less drama :P

"I didn't do it" ... "Then why are you laughing?" ... "Cause, whoever did it is a freaking genius."

5 TIPS FOR WOMEN: 1.Its important that a man has a job. 2.Its important that a man makes you laugh. 3.Its important to find a man that doesnt lie to you. 4.Its important that a man loves you. 5.Its important that these 4 men dont know each other!!!

Teacher: Give me an example of something expands in heat and contracts in cold. Student: Summer break 10 weeks, winter break 2 weeks. Teacher: .....

girl:for halloween, i'll be boy:my girlfriend girl:okay.... boy:yeS! girl:you know that's it's only for a day right? boy:yea i do. girl:then why you so happy boy:cause atleast you get to be mine even though it's just for a day

If your makeup isn't done your hair is a mess and your in your pjs and he still cant resist taking you into his arms, he's a keeper.

One of the hardest things in life is watching the person you love, love someone else.

An "EX" is called an "EX" because it's an EXample of who you shouldn't date in the future.

boys are so much nicer when they aren't with their friends

A girl needs a blood transfusion, so her boyfriend gives her his. Months later they break up, and he wants his blood back. So she hands him a tampon and says she'll make monthly payments.

Featured Posts That You May Like:

Girl: Do you have a girlfriend? Boy: (smiles) No, why? Girl: Umm..nothing. Boy: Tell me beautiful. Girl: (smiles) I really like you. Boy: Do you know how long I've been waiting for you to say that?

I missed 10/10/10 10:10:10am now I am waiting for 10/10/10 10:10:10pm

I was asleep at 10/10/10 10:10:10 a.m.

I was alive on 10/10/10 10:10:10 a.m.

I lived in 01/01/01, 02/02/02, 03/03/03, 04/04/04, 05/05/05, 06/06/06, 07/07/07,08/08/08,09/09/09, 10/10/10!!!

I would be really upset if I missed 10:10:10 10/10/10, Twice!

TOMMOROW WILL BE 10:10:10 10/10/10

MY WISH IS YOU ON 10:10:10 10/10/10

I'd Rather Have A Root Canal Procedure Than Listen to Sarah Palin Give A Speech!

God bless the lives lost on Sept. 11, 2001.. Lets not just mourn but also celebrate life & remember how precious life is!

OMG I FREAKIN' MISS YOU BUDDYY

Checking your phone every 5 seconds.

Knowing all the words to a certain show/movie/song.

Having a million pictures of your favorite celebrity on your computer.

Give me a reason why i SHOULDN'T slap you

More featured posts >>

Popular Posts That You May Like:

Wouldn't life be perfect if sweatpants were sexy, Monday mornings were fun, junk food was healthy, guys weren't confusing, and nothing was regrettable

Typing a huge paragraph with your true feelings, but then erasing it and typing "yepp..."

I LOOOOOOOOOOOVE sleeping but never want to go to bed early

I think the only reason everyone holds on to memories so tightly is because memories are the only things that don't change when everything and everyone else does

If you ignore me, I will ignore you. If you dont start the conversation, we wont talk. If you don't put in the effort, why should I?

Being so close, you insult each other all the time and never get offended :)

If your makeup isn't done your hair is a mess and your in your pjs and he still cant resist taking you into his arms, he's a keeper

Girl: Do you have a girlfriend? Boy: (smiles) No, why? Girl: Umm..nothing. Boy: Tell me beautiful. Girl: (smiles) I really like you.

Boy: Do you know how long I've been waiting for you to say that?

A lot of guys are nice to girls when it's just them, but it takes a man to be nice to a girl when around all his friends

knowing you're gunna lose someone just by the way they talk or act different... then that gut feelings kicks in >.>

"f*ck you" "f*ck you too" "can I have a kiss?" "yeah"

I RECICLE.....BOYS :D

"WEEE. WEE. WEEEEE! WEEE! WEEE-" "Max." "WEE WEE WEEE." "MAXWELL!" "Yeah?" "You're home." "Oh, cool. Thanks, Mrs. A."

"hey krijg ik je nr? ...nee mr je krijgt mn e-mail adres: [email protected]"

Heres a condom. I figured since youre acting like a dick, you should dress like one too.

A little jealousy in a relationship is healthy, it's nice to know someone's afraid to lose you...

When I die i give my friend permission to change my status to "is chillin' with jesus"

"ur cute when ur mad"...... "well immabout to get real adorable"

There's always a little truth behind every "just kidding". A little knowledge behind every "I don't know" A little emotion behind every "I don't care" And a little pain behind every "it's okay"

I remember when staying up 'till midnight was hard to do, now its a bad habit.

teacher: Kyle, what is the answer to number 27 of the homework? Kyle: umm... Kid sitting behind him: (whispered) 42. Kyle: 42? Teacher: (surprised) that's right. Like this if this has ever happened to you.

*At the gym, boy starts doing sit ups* Boy: 1...2...3... *Hot girl walks by* Boy: 153...154...155...

Two blondes walked into a shop and they were really happy so the shopkeeper said "why are you two so

3AM. Boyfriend sends text message to his girl: "Hey

happy?" They replied "because we finished a jigsaw in 3 days and on the box it said 3-4 years"... Like if u get it :)

babe I know you're asleep... but I just wanted you to know... I just got the BEST killstreak in Black Ops!"

Do this: 1.)Go to GOOGLE TRANSLATOR 2.)Type the following,or just copy+paste it. ("Supercallifragalisticespiyaladocious'') 3.)Change English to Danish 4.)Then click listen. 5.) Smiles idiotically... 6.)Then, clicks the.....

Have you ever texted someone and they took forever to text back, so you checked what time you sent the text, calculated how long it took for them to reply, and tried to make them wait longer before you send your next response.

teacher: im gonna cal your mom elementry school:NOOOOOOO ill stop middle school: whattt ever (worries in head) high school: TELL HER I SIAD HI!!

*Mom Calls Your Name* Yeah? *silence* Yeah! *silence* YEAH?!!?!!?! *silence* Wtf...*sighs and gets up to go see what she wanted* Like if this has happened to you.

boy walks in room to see girl playing call of duty girl:DIE DIE DIE YOU STUPID NOONOOOONOOOO HE KILLED ME!!!! boy:i love you

You fight like a married couple, you talk like best friends, you flirt like first loves, and protect each other like brother and sister, obviously its meant to be.

-Friday nightMom: "Do you have any homework? You: "No." Mom: "Are you sure?" You: "Yes! Can we leave now?" -Sunday night, Almost asleepYou: "Oh crap! I have homework!"

If Buzz Light Year speaks Spanish in one part of Toy Story 3, does he speak English during this scene in the Spanish version of the movie?

A blonde is watching the news and hears that 2 Brazilian men die in a skydiving accident. She cries and says, "Oh my gosh, how many is a brazilian?"

1.go to Google maps 2.go to 35 Sampsonia Way, Pittsburgh Pennsylvania 3.click street view 4.turn the view around 5.ROFL 6.Like :)

Facebook is like jail, you sit around and waste time, write on walls, and get

So I'm taking my clothes off right now and in bed about

poked by people you don't know

to... (click here for more)

If Justin Bieber went missing, 95% of girls would die. 4% would celebrate. I'm part of the 1% that would be poking my new cell mate with a spoon. Like if you get it

Almost every guy on this planet is obsessed with Call of Duty: Black Ops. Just like almost all girls are obsessed with Justin Bieber. Like this if you are one of the few that dont lke either

he tells me to come in, i do, he tells me to lie down, i do, he tells me to open up, i do, he sticks something inside, it hurts, he takes it out it bleeds...

ITS THE DENTIST YOU PERVERT!!!!!!

Can you imagine how annoying and gay it would be if J.K Rowling wrote... "And then Harry Potter woke up from the long dream"

THE BIGGEST LIE EVER TOLD; was when the doctor walked in to Mrs. Bieber's hospital room and said, "congratulations, it's a boy"

Girl "12 years old": Mom billy showd me his penis at school today , Mom: (freaking out) , Girl: it reminded me of a peanut , Mom: Really it was small ? , Girl: No it was salty ! Mom:(passed out) :)

Guy: I'm jealous of your pillow. Girl: Why? Guy: It sleeps next to you everynight, it wipes away your tears, you hug it alot, and it gets to see you all the time.

Can I copy your homework? Yr 7: NO! Do you know how LONG I spent doing that??? Yr 8: Sure, but only the first question. Yr 9: *throws book at them* Yeah, take it. Yr 10: What homework?????

A true Girlfriend wouldn't ask there boyfriend to throw away his Xbox, she'd sit by him

teacher: can somebody gimme green, pink, and yellow in one sentence? student: i can! i heard the phone was ringing, GREEN.. GREEN.. so, i PINK up the phone, and i said, "YELLOW, who's there?"

trying to learn it

teacher: .....

Good friends... You: Hey! How's it going? Them: Fine, how about you? Best friends... You: Hey ugly! What's up?! Them: Your MOM! You: Your face!

FAKE STORY:*Girl walks in crying* Boy: Babe, who's ass am i kicking tonight? REAL STORY: *Girl walks in crying* Boy: *Playing Black Ops*- Oh hey babe, wanna make me a sandwich?

Girl; I love you. Boy; I love you too baby. Girl; Prove it. Scream it to the world. Boy; *whispers in her ear* I love you. Girl; Why'd you say it to me? Boy; Because, you're my world(:

Type Trolololoololloloollololloloooolollololoolololloloollololololool into google translator and click listen. ROFL

gillianit might be you lol jk it is you

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LMFAO

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Boy: hey my friend is coming over. he is in the computer club with me. Sister: i dont want a nerd in my house. wait there already is one.. :) Boy: ....

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Opinion of John Cena through the ages: Elementary: WOOOOO HE IS MY HERO Middle: Okay he is becoming gay High School: WOULD HE JUST DIE ALREADY!?!?!?

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Sorry, but you're a douche. I've got better things to do then deal with your shit.

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Twilight Is Awesome!!!!!!!!!!!

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2 Christmas trees: $40 Look on your daughters face when you nearly leave her at the tree shop, making

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ur ego is gettin old...

her run in the rain to catch up to the car: Priceless!

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Twilight made vampires cool again,Harry Potter made wizards cool again,and Zombie land made zombies cool again.....wow people r good at making things better ;)

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When it comes to being romantic i'm the best. ^^

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i love waking up in the morning to get a lot of texts.... especially one from youu

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like if u wnt da rugrats 2 b shown on tv reguarly again

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I miss being little and always jumping outta the car and running to get the windshield wipers things at gas stations

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*gets off facebook because theres nothing to do* hmmmm i wonder what to do... *gets right back on facebook*