Jean's Reviews > Becoming

“Your story is what you have, what you will always have. It is something to own.” - Michelle Obama

With those words, and others, in the preface of her own story, Becoming , Michelle Obama captured my attention and my heart.

In the opening section titled, “Becoming Me,” she recalls her childhood on Chicago’s South Side up until the time in her life when her relationship with Barack Obama took a turn from working together and being friends to something more substantial and more intimate. Michelle Robinson was blessed to have two wonderful parents, Fraser and Marian Robinson, who loved her and her older brother Craig. They lived in an apartment, which they rented from Marian’s aunt and her husband, who lived downstairs. As a young girl, Michelle took piano lessons from her great-aunt, who was a demanding teacher. She also loved hanging out listening to jazz albums with her grandfather, whom she and her brother affectionately referred to as “Southside. Her father worked for the City of Chicago’s water filtration plant for more than 20 years without missing a day of work despite living with multiple sclerosis. Her mother stayed at home to raise the two kids; her goal, Michelle says, was to “push” them out into the world. Throughout this segment, Mrs. Obama tells many of her childhood memories and recognizes dear family and friends who influenced her. Of course, she grew up knowing that if you are black, and if you are female, you must work so much harder to make your mark in the world. As she says, it is a struggle to know that “you are good enough.” Both kids did well in school; although Michelle had the benefit of her older brother paving the way, she was driven to prove herself and do well. Eventually, she followed him to the mainly white Princeton University. After graduation, she moved back to Chicago to work as an attorney. It was there that she met Barack Obama, who was to be a summer intern at Sidley & Austin, the law firm where she worked. He was late on his first day. Not a great first impression on Michelle, who was a stickler for promptness and attention to detail.

The next portion is, “Becoming Us.” Here, Mrs. Obama looks back on the beginnings of her relationship with her husband. She notes the contrasts in their personalities, the differences in their families and their upbringing, and she relishes in the process of their becoming a couple. Her family was so close; he never knew his father, and he has half-siblings and grandparents whom he had only met a few times. The descriptions of getting to each getting to know the other’s families are precious. Then, of course, there were work issues. She had a career. She eventually figured out that being a lawyer wasn’t really in her wheelhouse, and Barack proved to be a good listener and a good resource. She found her niche in non-profits and advocacy work. He found his passion in politics, and she was supportive – until kids arrived and politics cut into family life. She is remarkably frank about the relationship problems as well as personal issues they encountered, yet they seemed always kind and considerate, I believe, of one another’s feelings. As she tells it, they seem to have a very strong mutual respect for one another.

“Becoming More” is an inside look at the White House years. During the campaign, she had felt hurt that she had been criticized for seeming like “an angry black woman.” She was cognizant of the need to be on guard, always, to watch her words, her body language, and her appearance, especially because now she was the first African American FLOTUS. People were always watching, ready to judge. It wasn’t all bad, but she felt especially protective of their two daughters, Malia and Sasha, who were just in elementary school when Mr. Obama was first elected. I did love the Secret Service’s code names for the family: Barack was “Renegade,” Michelle was “Renaissance.” The girls picked their own: Malia – “Radiance” and Sasha, “Rosebud.” Michelle’s mother, who came to live with them to look after the girls, became “Raindance.” There are few policy discussions in this section, because the couple rarely discussed the political aspects of the presidency. In fact, Barack was home for dinner much more often as President than at any other time during his political career. But Michelle describes what became her pet projects as First Lady: the garden, which became the focal point of her push to reduce childhood obesity and her Let’s Move! Project. She also was a strong advocate for girls and young women all over the world to learn, shape their futures, and become assets to their communities. She regularly visited injured soldiers at Walter Reed Hospital and advocated for military members and their families throughout the world. Throughout their eight years in Washington, she is aware that while the family felt confined in many ways by security, tradition, politics, and the press, there were so many positive experiences about being in the White House. She was always aware of her roots, and in her most gracious, giving manner, she knew that she needed to share those blessings with others whenever she could.

Throughout this memoir, Mrs. Obama does very little political haranguing. At times, however, she lets her heart speak. She was deeply touched during the shooting tragedies at Sandy Hook Elementary and the Emanuel Church killings in Charleston. She decries Donald Trump’s statements during the campaign that attacked minorities and women, but through the course of her story, she mostly maintains her theme, “When they go low, we go high.” How I miss this family! We were so fortunate to have had eight years of their wisdom and goodness showing us the way. Thank you, Michelle Obama, for sharing your story with us! Thank you for your continued presence in so many ways. You know there are more chapters to write, more to Become.

5 stars