Candace Dempsey's Reviews > Games People Play

While Berne's social paradigm is certainly out of date, Candace, many of his observations are not. I encounter people every day playing "If It Weren't For You," "Why Don't YOU Yes But," "Look How Hard I'm Trying," "Wooden Leg," "I'm Sorry," "Ain't It Awful," etc. The ability to understand that their interactions are game-driven eliminates for me a lot of the drama in trying to complete transactions with them.

Dr. Berne was a product of his time (the 1940s and 50s was when he was educated and started practicing). While we live in a more enlightened era it is important not to throw the proverbial baby out with the proverbial bathwater.

emphasis on proverbial.

I seriously get bad vibes too. Considering just putting it down for good, or would you recommend powering through?

Ninad wrote: "liberal cuck"

A typical player of "ain't it awful?"

I hope you stop reading these kinds of awful sexist stuffs then and miss out on all the knowledge you could gain.

Precisely. He referred to homosexuality as some sort of... a “game” that causes disabilities. He called it provocative behavior. He made a number of unflattering comments about false rape and sexual assault allegations. This book, which might have been interesting enough a couple decades ago, really didn’t age well. It feels thoroughly outdated in its logic. The entire premise is based on the three “ego states” of adult, child and parent: yet this is but another psychological theory, not too different from what freud may come up with. There’s so much speculation, and no evidence, and hence the unflattering depiction of women (as completely irrational, whereas men are portrayed as rational but driven to irrationality by emotions such as pride or by games) just come off as really sexist rather than a valid critique.

I feel ambivalent in the role of standing up for Dr. Berne's tactics. I'm fully aware that some of the the language and attitudes in The Games People Play is outdated. What I'm getting at is that the game theory is NOT and there is plenty of evidence in ANY human communication of the existence of these games and of the attitudes in the adult/parent/child nexus. Go beyond his obvious 20th century biases and look at the games he identifies specifically and you'll immediately see that people still play them assiduously through their unconscious and by identifying them and depotentiating them, real communication can occur.

He hardly mentions homosexuality at all here and not in any particularly derogatory way. Grow up

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

This is not a review