Sabotage: The Hexon Code, #7

CHAPTER 1

WHAT IS THE MEANING of life when someone else controls you? When you’re not able to make your own decisions, when someone tells you what to do and when to eat? When he rules over you because he can? Because the rules have changed?

Somedays I didn’t know if I could keep going on. Somedays were harder than others. What was the point of my life when my function had been reduced to the basic things a woman could provide: her body and her cooking skills.

Someday, I’m gettin’ the hell out of this mother effin’ place, Liana said, her voice low as she glanced over at me and scrubbed the cook pot. Go somewhere I’m respected.

What’re you talking about? a male voice asked behind us, his footsteps approaching.

I jerked my head and saw Hector walking into the kitchen.

Respect? he asked, spitting out the word.

Liana and I exchanged a quick glance. Her face was flushed, and she looked scared.

We respect you, he said, his voice softening as he set his hand on her hip.

When he bowed his head to her shoulder, she sucked in a breath.

For your services, he added.

She sighed. That’s not what I mean. No one seemed to like the stew I made yesterday.

I knew that was a lie. She hadn’t been referring to her cooking skills.

Oh. He ran his hand over her bare thigh.

Quickly, I looked away, bowing my head and clamping my eyes shut so I wouldn’t have to witness the way her body responded to his touch. Not that looking away helped keep the images out of my head.

She sucked in a quicker breath and then moaned.

Well, he said, his voice low, it needed more salt.

No one said anything.

I squeezed my eyes tighter at the breathless quality of her voice and tried not to imagine his fingers between her thighs.

I could have added more.

We all know what you’re skilled in, darlin’. It’s no big deal.

As he spoke, she moaned again.

When he laughed, I bit my trembling lip harder. He seemed to love to torment her.

And what’s the matter with you?

It took me a second to realize he was talking to me. Swallowing hard, I opened my eyes and met his gaze for a brief moment before bowing my head again. Um, I stammered. I’m not feeling well. My stomach hurts.

That was true. My stomach had tied into a tight knot. It always did.

Hector pulled away from Liana as he said, I’ll give you something to help you relax.

I grimaced. I hadn’t expected him to come up with a solution. And I didn’t need anything that would make me feel numb.

While he was gone, Liana leaned closer, grasped my arm, and whispered, Whatever he gives you, take it, but throw it back up.

I didn’t think I could make myself throw up, but I nodded anyway. She was wiser and older. By a few years. More life experience in her to make more calculated decisions.

When Hector came back, he took my hand and set two pills on my palm.

I blinked at them for a few seconds. Finally, I lifted my head and looked him in the eye. What are these?

Muscle relaxers, he replied.

I repeated the words, too stunned to accept them.

Are you daft? You need something for that, too?

Quickly, I shook my head.

I think what she’s getting at, Liana said, is that she doesn’t understand why she needs muscle relaxers for an upset stomach.

Hector turned his head and stared at her. If that’s what she means, she should speak up.

I’m sorry, I said, my voice trembling. Thank you.

He retrieved a glass from the cupboard over my head and then filled it with water from the faucet. Then he placed it in my hand, curling my fingers around it. Here you go, darlin’. Drink up. Henry will be back soon.

I looked down at the two pills. I honestly didn’t know if they were what he said they were. He wasn’t exactly the most honest individual I had ever met. Not that that was saying much. The last time I had met anyone outside of the gang was three years ago.

Come on now. You don’t want to disappoint him again. He raised his hand and traced the dark bruise on my cheek with his fingertips.

Blinking back tears, I bit my trembling lip.

Do you? he whispered, leaning closer.

Quickly, I shook my head. These will make my stomach feel better?

Sure.

I wasn’t stupid. I knew he wasn’t a doctor. Muscle relaxers would loosen the knot in my stomach, I knew that, but they’d also make me weak. But he was standing there waiting for me to take them. Can I take one now and see if I need more?

He sighed as he glanced at Liana. Sure, whatever, Kallis. I’m just trying to help you.

I know, I said quickly. I didn’t mean to upset you.

He reached out and picked up one of the pills with his thumb and forefinger. You’re such a lightweight anyway, he said with a shrug. Two might knock you out.

Before I could talk myself out of it and before I got a slap in the face for arguing, I washed the pill down with water.

Good girl, he said, taking the glass from my hand and setting it down on the counter behind me. So, what’s for dinner tonight?

While he leaned over the pot and breathed in the savory steam, Liana cast me a worried look over his head. I tried to give her a weak smile.

It smells good, he added.

Finally, she said, It’s a creamy tomato and rabbit soup. Remember the rabbits you butchered a couple months ago? I slow-cooked one today and added the shreds to the soup.

He picked up the spoon, dipped it into the liquid, and then tasted it. Then he hummed. "I guess you can cook."

Liana closed her eyes like she was channeling a silent rage.

After he set the glass lid back on the cook pot, he hooked an arm around her waist and placed his other hand at the small of my back and guided us out of the kitchen and down the hallway toward the bedrooms.

At the door to Henry’s room, he said, Wait here.

There wasn’t any point to nodding agreement. We did this every day. And for some reason, he felt the need to tell me what to do. I stepped inside and sat down on the neatly made bed, the bed I had made earlier after Henry had left for work.

A few minutes later, I finally remembered what Liana had said about throwing up the pills. Quickly, I rose to my feet to run to the bathroom, but then I heard footsteps from down the hall.

My pulse quickened as I sat back down. I never knew what kind of mood Henry would be in whenever he got back. But this time, when he walked in, he actually smiled at me. Which was rare.

I tried to smile back. Hi, I said, rising to my feet and meeting him at the dresser. I reached out to help him undress, but he lifted me and set me on the top of the dresser instead. I bit my lip and clasped my trembling hands in my lap as I watched him remove his T-shirt. His muscles flexed and his skin glistened with sweat, making my throat go dry.

If it wasn’t for his usually abrasive personality, and the way he treated me, I might have actually wanted him. He was physically attractive. Capable. Strong. Smart.

He eyed me as he unbuttoned his jeans. You look tired. His first words.

I do? I asked, starting to panic.

His lips jutted out a little as he nodded slightly, his eyes raking over me.

Um. I cleared my throat. I, um. My stomach hurt. So, Hector gave me something for it. A muscle relaxer, he said.

His eyebrows lifted.

My panic intensified and I tried to smooth it over. I only took one.

Feel better?

Quickly, I nodded. That wasn’t a lie. The knot in my stomach had loosened.

From now on, don’t listen to Hector. And don’t ever take what he gives you.

I swallowed hard as I searched his eyes. Why? I whispered.

He’s not trying to help you. I’m actually surprised he didn’t give you Rohypnol.

I didn’t know what that was, but judging by Henry’s reaction, it must have been bad. I was afraid, I said, looking away and then glancing down at my hands, of what he would do if I refused.

He huffed. What have I told you about our arrangement? he asked. "I tell you what you can do."

CHAPTER 2

WHEN A TEAR SLIPPED down my face, I quickly brushed it away but then cried out when the pads of my fingers rubbed over the bruise. The bruise Henry had given me. And then more tears flooded my eyes.

Hmm?

I sniffled. I’m afraid of you, and he said—

Am I as unkind as your previous owners?

I let out a helpless breath. He always brought that up to compare himself to all of the men before him.

Am I? he asked again.

No, I croaked, shaking my head.

He hummed. I didn’t think so.

That didn’t change the fact that he scared me, but he seemed to think it mattered.

I’ve kept you for over a year. Have you realized that?

More tears slipped down my face. Sniffling, I tried to wipe my face dry. I didn’t realize it’s been that long.

He hooked a finger under my chin and tilted my head back. I like you.

That wasn’t enough for him to stop cutting me down whenever it suited him.

I don’t mind that you’ll never bear a child.

A small sob escaped my trembling lips as my face flushed.

He searched my eyes. I knew he was expecting me to thank him.

I grasped his wrist and closed my eyes as I tilted my head. I sniffled again and wet my bottom lip with the tip of my tongue. I’m sorry. I appreciate all that you do for me.

You do?

Opening my eyes, I nodded. Thank you.

You’re welcome. He moved his hand to the side of my neck and rubbed his thumb firmly over my throat.

Warmth flooded inside my stomach.

Then he lifted me off the dresser and set me back on my feet. Go start my shower. I’ll be there in a minute.

With a quick nod, I stumbled into the bathroom. The cool tile floor did little to wake me up. I braced a hand on the counter as I made my way to the shower stall. With a trembling hand, I turned the knobs and then turned my palm up to the water, waiting for it to heat up. I let my hand fall to my side as I rested my head against the wall and then closed my eyes.

When a hand slid across my hip, I gasped, startled.

Were you thinking of me today? Henry whispered against my ear.

I swallowed hard. I always do. That was true, but never in a good way unless I was trying to justify his behavior. Sometimes I did, trying to find hope that maybe someday he would see me the way I had read that God sees me.

This was all I could think about, he said, gliding his hand up the front of my thigh underneath the hem of my nightgown.

When his lips grazed my earlobe, I clamped my eyes shut.

I should take you with me tomorrow. That way I don’t have to wait. I can do this whenever I want.

I couldn’t imagine spending all day with him while he worked. What on earth would I be doing? Sitting around while he did who knew what. What would I be doing?

Looking pretty, he said, nudging me into the shower stall and under the shower head. It’s what you do best.

I moved my head out from under the hot stream as I blew out a slow breath, sputtering water. More at his comment than the hot water plastering my long hair to my head and the nightgown to my skin.

I don’t know, Kallis. Use your imagination. If you have one.

I have one, I said, my voice so quiet I could barely hear it. I wiped the water from my eyes.

What was that? he asked.

Keeping my eyes downcast, I turned my head to the side. I have an imagination.

He hummed. Maybe you could use it more. Like right now.

What? I whispered, lifting my chin and catching his eye.

He huffed. Sometimes you are so naïve. That alone is almost enough to get me hard.

I blinked back tears as I let my gaze drift from his.

Ah, fuck, he said, sounding annoyed. What did I tell you about crying?

I’m sorry, I croaked, covering my face with a hand.

He turned me around and then pressed my back to the cold shower tiles.

I sucked in a breath.

He bent down and then lifted me, forcing me to straddle his hips. He thrust himself inside me, making me cry out. With one hand supporting my weight and the other circling my neck, he thrust his hips hard against me.

I gripped his arm as I searched his eyes. There wasn’t any point to fighting him. He had never squeezed hard enough to make me pass out. If there was any area with which I could trust him, it was in that. He was rough, as usual. Rougher than the others had ever been.

When he was done, he pressed his forehead to mine, his heavy breath blowing in my face. His hand around my throat loosened and his thumb started to make firm swirls on my neck. Despite myself, my muscles clenched and pulsed, making me moan.

He hummed. I know you like it rough, he whispered, lowering his hand and splaying it over my heaving chest, warming it. You always do, don’t you?

He always said it like it was a bad thing. Like I shouldn’t find pleasure in it. I didn’t want to. I wanted him to be gentle, to show that he actually loved me or at least cared about me, but he never did. I guessed the fact that he hadn’t sold me to someone else was supposed to be enough.

You can’t deny it, can you?

No, I said quietly, knowing no other response would satisfy him.

"Now do you feel like crying?"

I shook my head. That was another lie. But it didn’t matter anyway. He wouldn’t change his behavior and give me what I wanted. Instead, he would do everything in his power to make sure I didn’t get it.

Good. He set my feet back on the floor. Then he handed me the bath sponge.

Keeping my eyes downcast, I took the sponge and then squeezed out some body wash from the soap bottle. When he turned his back to me, I pressed the sponge to his shoulder and massaged it over his bare skin.

We did this every day. Liana and I cooked their meals, cleaned the apartment, offered our bodies to them, bathed them, and shared their beds. It could have been worse. Henry could have offered me to other men. That’s what Carl had done.

I had never understood why he did that. Men weren’t supposed to behave that way. But ever since the people had overthrown the Detroit city government, the rules had changed. The nine gangs ruled the city now. And each gang controlled its own area of the city. Detroit had fallen, and this was a woman’s fate now. At least in the Creekside district. I had no idea what it was like in the other districts.

When I was done lathering Henry with the soap, he rinsed off and then turned to me. Make yourself some tea, he said. I want you wide awake tonight.

Quickly, I nodded.

He regarded me a moment longer and then stepped out of the shower and dried off with a towel.

When he walked naked out of the bathroom, I lowered myself to the bench seat, wrapping my arms around my chest as I leaned my head against the tile wall. I stifled a sob with my hand and then clamped my mouth shut. If he heard me, he’d be back and who knew what he would do.

After a moment, after my breathing had calmed, I blew out a slow breath. Then I pried off the soaked nightgown and showered, washing away the tears.

If only I could wash away my shitty life, too.

CHAPTER 3

AFTER I DRESSED in a clean nightgown and towel-dried my hair, I padded out to the kitchen to make the tea.

Liana was standing barefoot at the stove, stirring the soup. Her hair was damp, and she was wearing a long sweater over a clean nightgown. When I approached, she gave me a weak smile.

Do we have any tea? I asked, opening the cupboard door where we usually stocked teas and other packaged beverages.

What kind? she asked, her voice quiet.

Henry wants me wide awake.

She stared at me for a moment and then she shook her head like she was clearing away her thoughts. Clearing her throat, she reached up and grabbed a box of tea from the cupboard. Try this one. It’s peppermint.

Thanks, I said.

Everything okay? she whispered.

I nodded and then filled the kettle with water from the faucet.

Can you get me the cayenne pepper?

I pulled out the drawer filled with the herbs and spices and then handed her the jar. Then I watched her sprinkle it into the cook pot.

Some of the women in our district raised rabbits for slaughter and sold them live at our market. I had never been outside. Not since the gangs took over the city and I was taken from my family by one of the leaders when I was sixteen. I stuck my head out the window whenever I got the chance to breathe in the fresh air, but as for walking outside on the streets below, it had been years.

Will you take out the bowls?

I jerked my head and saw Liana glancing my way. With a nod, I retrieved four bowls and spoons from the cupboard and then took them to the dining table. By the time I was done setting the four places, the kettle was whistling.

Liana turned off the burner and moved the kettle to a hot pad on the counter. She opened the box of tea packets and then dropped a packet into a mug and poured the hot water over it.

Thanks, I said, coming up beside her and staring down into the peppermint-scented steam.

Will you go tell them dinner is ready? She carried the pot of soup to the table and began ladling it out into the bowls.

I wandered down the hallway and found Henry and Hector talking in the far room, the one they always kept padlocked. I wasn’t allowed inside. I wasn’t even allowed to peer inside it. Keeping my head down, I knocked lightly on the door.

When Henry appeared at the door, I cleared my throat and said, Liana asked me to tell you dinner is ready.

Give us a minute, he replied.

I nodded and backed away. When I returned to the kitchen, Liana had finished dishing the bowls. She stood at the sink, washing the cook pot with dish soap. When she set it aside, I rinsed it under hot water and laid it on a towel to dry.

What’s taking them so long? she asked.

I shrugged. Henry said a minute.

The food is going to get cold.

I heard her let out an irritated sigh as I took out the tray of dinner rolls that I had baked earlier from the refrigerator. I set them inside the oven to warm.

When I leaned back against the counter to wait, she set her hand on my shoulder and leaned in close. Are you okay? she whispered.

My throat tightened. I shrugged my shoulder. I really didn’t know what to say. I felt empty and I didn’t think that would ever change. My life didn’t have meaning beyond answering to someone else.

She gave me a comforting smile and then pulled me into her arms. Someday, we’re going to get free.

I nodded against her shoulder.

Finally, we heard footsteps approaching. Quickly, we broke apart and busied ourselves with cleaning the counters.

The men appeared and headed to the table. If they glanced our way, I didn’t notice. I was too focused on scrubbing a section of counter. But when I heard the scrape of a chair leg, I looked up and caught Henry eyeing me.

Get in here, he said.

I dropped the cloth in the sink and then took my place beside him at the table. I folded my hands in my lap and stared down at my bowl.

Hector made a loud slurping sound from across the table.

I silently prayed the food was still hot. They had taken much longer than a minute.

The food is cold, Hector said, looking up at Liana.

I’m sorry, she replied, standing up and reaching for his bowl. I can reheat it.

Before she could touch the bowl, he grasped her wrist, making her cry out like she was in pain.

You do that, he said.

Her throat bobbed as she shifted her gaze across the table. Henry, do you want your soup reheated?

It’s fine, Henry said gruffly.

I bowed my head, trying to make myself invisible.

Please, Hector, she said, her voice trembling. You’re hurting my wrist.

This is nothing compared to what I’d like to do to you.

I’m sorry.

Hector, that’s enough, Henry said, his voice firm.

Hector cocked his head as he turned his attention to Henry. Just giving her the treatment she deserves.

I clamped my eyes shut. How could he treat her that way? What made him so much better that he could treat her like she was so far beneath him? It wasn’t fair.

Come on. Let her go.

I heard the scrape of the bottom of the bowl on the tabletop. And then a hand grasped my upper arm. Gasping, I opened my eyes and stared at Henry.

Go help her, he said.

Looking away, I nodded and then rose to my feet. I hadn’t tasted the soup, but since Hector had said it was cold, it was probably at least lukewarm. He tended to be overly dramatic. When I leaned closer and cupped Henry’s bowl in my hands, I could feel Hector’s eyes on me, like he was waiting for something bad to happen. With a pause, I glanced at Henry and asked, Can I take it?

Henry leaned back in his chair and folded his arms over his chest as he said, Fine.

I picked up his bowl and then carried it into the kitchen, careful not to slosh the liquid over the rim. I set it on the baking sheet that Liana had placed in the oven along with Hector’s bowl.

I could tell she was struggling to keep calm, and I knew she wanted to fight back.

But there was no winning.

If she managed to get outside the apartment, one of the other men would stop her. And that would be worse. I had seen it happen when I was with Kent, one of the other gang members. It was never a good thing to step foot outside the apartment, unless you had an escort.

You should take them your rolls, Liana said, gesturing toward the baking sheet of bread sitting on the glass top of the oven. They’re warm.

I nodded and then took the warmed dinner rolls to the table. As I set down the baking sheet between the men, I said, I made bread today.

I was about to head back into the kitchen when Henry grabbed my arm and pulled me down onto his lap. He wrapped his arm around my waist, trapping me against him, with my back to his chest. His hand cupped my cheek and then made a slow progression down my neck and between my breasts while Hector watched.

Bowing my head, I tried to ignore his stare. He seemed to be enjoying the show as he chewed the bread with an open mouth.

When Henry trailed his hand up my leg and settled it at the apex of my thighs, I gasped. I couldn’t do anything. I couldn’t push his hand away. If I struggled, he’d make me regret it. And if I cried, he’d make me regret that, too. I was at his mercy. As Liana was at Hector’s.

Tell Hector how much you enjoy this, Henry whispered in my ear, his warm breath sending shivers down my spine as his fingertips grazing sensitive flesh made me suck in a quiet breath.

She doesn’t have to say a word, Hector replied with a laugh. I can tell by her face.

I blinked back tears as I bit down hard on my trembling lip. I wanted to push his hand away. I wanted to get off his lap.

Well? Henry asked, his lips brushing gently over my earlobe.

Henry, please, I pleaded. I was afraid of what he would do to me for pleading with him to stop, but I hoped he would finally show mercy. Just this once.

All right, Liana said, walking back into the dining room.

Henry removed his hand and then gripped my hips and lifted me off his lap, shoving me toward my chair.

I stumbled, catching myself against the edge of the table. But he didn’t seem to care. I sat down in my chair beside his before my trembling legs gave out on me.

Liana glanced my way as she set Hector’s bowl in front of him. Be careful. The bowls are hot.

He picked up his spoon and stirred the soup as steam rose from the bowl. Before he had a chance to reply—although it was unlikely that he would—she turned back to the kitchen and retrieved Henry’s bowl.

Thank you, Liana. You didn’t have to do that, Henry said when she set his bowl in front of him.

You’re welcome.

To an untrained ear, his tone would have sounded genuine, but I knew he was just doing it to irritate Hector. And I was pretty sure she knew it, too. She was better at pretending than I was. And she apologized less.

Liana and I sat there in silence, waiting for them to give us permission to eat. I sipped my tea, careful not to make the slightest slurping sound.

Finally as Henry rose from his chair, he glanced my way and said, Eat.

Thank you, I said quietly, picking up my spoon. My food was almost always cold by the time I got to eat it. He took the joy out of eating, like a soul-sucking evil force. He was an