Summer's Echo: Soulless, #4

SUMMER’S ECHO is the final book in the SOULLESS Series.

Long-denied passions ignite in an all-consuming conflagration, ending in tragedy. Lives collide and bonds dissolve.  An exotic locale holds the key to the past.  

SEXUAL THEMES, STRONG LANGUAGE.  

This book is dedicated to my beautiful daughter Lyla, who is a joy and an inspiration to me.

SUMMER’S ECHO

BOOK FOUR OF THE SOULLESS SERIES

Table of Contents

Part One

Chapter 1/ LATE SPRING

Chapter 2/ FORGOTTEN SUMMERS

Chapter 3/ WHAT I DID FOR LOVE

Chapter 4/ THROUGH THE FIRE

Chapter 5/ I WANT TO LIVE

Chapter 6/ GOD ONLY KNOWS

Chapter 7/ YOU GO TO MY HEAD

Chapter 8/ ALL THINGS THAT ARE BEAUTIFUL

Chapter 9/ MAYBE TOMORROW

Chapter 10/ SOMEWHERE

Chapter 11/ FOR THE LOVE OF BRETT

Chapter 12/ HOW DO YOU KEEP THE MUSIC PLAYING?

Chapter 13/ DIDN’T WE ALMOST HAVE IT ALL?

Chapter 14/ I’LL NEVER STOP LOVING YOU

Part Two

Chapter 15/ RASPBERRY DANISH

Chapter 16/ A LESSON IN LITERATURE

Chapter 17/ ANGELS’ DAY OFF  

Chapter 18/ A DAY IN THE LIFE OF A FOOL

Chapter 19/ RAEVYNN  

Chapter 20/ SEA GREEN GODDESS

Chapter 21/ AS THE CROW FLIES

Chapter 22/ WHERE WOULD I BE?

Chapter 23/ GRAB AND RUN

Chapter 24/ AUGUST WINDS

Chapter 25/ AT THE END OF OUR LOVE AFFAIR  

Chapter 26/ WITCHES, GOBLINS, AND GHOSTS

Chapter 27/ MUSIC FROM ACROSS THE WAY

Chapter 28/ ALL THAT MY HEART CAN HOLD  

EPILOGUE  

Chapter 1/ LATE SPRING  

The words played repeatedly in her head like a slowed-down 45 rpm record. Cymbals and gongs rang out in her ears. Cars swished by in a swirl of headlights, their horns like discordant trombones in a marching band of harbingers of ill will. The rain chilled her to the bone. 

Leaning against one of the porch columns to steady herself, she dug around in her shoulder bag for her keys. She let herself into the dark vestibule and pressed the button marked NO. In the living room, she threw herself on the sofa and buried her head under an oversized toss cushion. The harsh ringing of the telephone demanded her attention. She reached across to the opposite side of the lamp table to pick up the receiver.

Hi, Mom. the voice on the other end said.

Toby, what’s wrong, hon?

Nothing’s wrong, Mom. I’ve got something to tell you: There’s somebody here.

Who, honey?

It’s Laurie, Mom. She’s here with her son.

Laurie?

She’s got a little eight month old son, Zenon. She’s divorced now.

Is she moving here? 

She’s just visiting...Actually, she just showed up at the door. I called you before, but you were out.

I had an appointment. Do you think she’ll speak to me?

I’ll see. Just a sec – okay?

She could hear him in the background, engaged in a heated discussion.

Laurie, I’ve got Mom on the phone. She really wants to talk to you.

Tell her to keep the fuck away from me.

Come on. She’s our mother.

She’s no fucking mother to me.

Laurie, you’re being really immature. You’re holding grudges from way back when we were little kids. That’s not fair. Mom’s a really good mom. She loves all of us a lot.

She might be a good mother to the lot of you, but she’s never been a good mother to me. She was a fucking drunk and whore.

Mom always did the best she could for all of us. Why don’t you just give her a chance? It’s not easy being a mom on your own. this was Keir’s voice.

I can see she’s got all of you brainwashed.

You’re so pigheaded. You didn’t even want to meet our elder sister, Marin.

Miss Fucking Goody Two Shoes, the Fucking Golden Child. No thanks.

Laurie, you have to grow up some time and there’s no time like the present. this was Lisa, Keir’s fiancée, She’s your mother and she loves you very much. You can’t hold on to this ‘poor me’ attitude forever. Frankly, it’s wearing thin. Now that you’re a mother yourself, you’ll soon realize how difficult it is to raise children.

Who the fuck do you think you are to judge me, bitch? Who the fuck do all of you think you are? I can see it was a huge mistake to visit my so-called family, to show my son. From now on, you’re all fucking dead to me.

Who cares? Toby snickered, Who needs you, anyway?

I’m very disappointed in you, Laurie. this was Josh. I believed becoming a mother yourself would make you more compassionate, but you’re as hardened and cold as ever. Maybe it’s for the best if you stay away. You’ll find out soon enough what the real world is all about.

Yeah. You’ll come crawling back to us. Toby said.

Don’t hold your fucking breath. Fuck you! Fuck you all!

Laurie! Josh called out with authority. Sit down!

There was desperate cry of a baby and the slamming of a door.

Laurie!

Let her go, Dad. She’s a head case. Keir said.

Yeah, she’s possessed! She needs an exorcist! Toby said.

Mom. Keir picked up the phone. I’m really sorry about that. Laurie’s gone off the deep end. I’ll call you back soon. Okay?

Sure, hon. Love you bunches.

Love you, Mom.

The words were still echoing in her head:

I’m so sorry to inform you, Brett...So sorry...I’m so sorry to inform you...

*   *   *

Following a mild winter, spring was still struggling to put down roots in early June. Dottie sank her hands deep into the pockets of her long plum cardigan and continued her walk along The Green. When had it all begun to fall apart? When had she lost her footing and fallen into that chasm? She had not seen it coming. Five years of marriage...Five years of memories...all swept away, discarded...Yes, it had ended amicably, people reminded her, not the way other marriages had dissolved, embroiled in custody battles, infidelity, acrimony...It had all been most civilized. They were simply incompatible. There were no children, no financial battles. Despite a lack of prenuptial agreement, (for which, she had been admonished dozens of times by her parents) J.T. had made no financial demands. It had ended as though it had never happened. They had hugged and wept for the very last time. He had loaded his belongings into his friend’s pickup truck and driven away to Nova Scotia for a fresh start. Well-meaning mutual acquaintances kept her informed about his activities, emphasizing his lack of romantic partners, just as they most likely informed him of her similar predicament.

She missed the umbrella of her illusions that had sheltered her from the real world as a child. She and Peggy had laughed, played, made crafts and frightened themselves on carnival rides. Now, it was just the four of them left at the mansion: Her, Peggy, Warren and the newly-widowed Maxine, barely keeping the place together, constantly having to hire workers to remedy one old house problem or another, and getting swindled in the process because of the family name. Peggy and Maxine paid a low rent for a suite each and pitched in with the cooking and laundry, while a cleaning service came in once a week. Her father had been forced to dismiss the entire staff. No one on the outside had an inkling about the financial woes visited upon them following Tony’s death. He had managed to funnel the majority of the family fortune into Sydney’s annuity and yet another surprise annuity: Jack’s. His colleagues had been able to arrange provisions for Jack according to his wishes without disclosing his whereabouts to anyone. Tony had planned every minutiae with meticulous care and selected the most trustworthy colleagues to execute his grand plan. He had even made provisions for her.

No one had grieved Mildred’s death six months following Tony’s. And no one had missed her parents after their permanent move to Victoria, B.C. She had not remained in contact with them, or granted them a passing thought. She felt a sense of calm, at last. She was leading an ordinary life – once, the most unattainable treasure.  

Chapter 2/ FORGOTTEN SUMMERS

No more running. No more lies. He was free at last. Free to breathe. Free to be Jack Chandler. If only he could remember whoever Jack Chandler was. He climbed the steep stairs to the dimly lit third floor of the aging, hastily gentrified brick tenement. He opened the door bearing the sign: Dr. Abraham Bloomberg, Psychologist. The stern woman with bifocals and a severe bun at the reception desk acknowledged him with a nod. Behind her, the office door opened and a white-haired man smiled. 

Ah, Jack, come right in. 

He closed the door behind them after Jack settled in the black leather chair and glanced around the office at the colorful abstract art on the walls.

How have things been since our last meeting? he sat behind his desk facing Jack.

About the same. Doctor, I was wondering if we should try hypnosis again.

Considering the traumatic experience you had when we tried it before, I’m hesitant to try it again, Jack. First, you relived being in the fire at your club. Then, you remembered that woman insulting your manhood...What was her name again? Laura?

Linda. She’s the one who was murdered and I believed for the longest time that I had killed her.

It was established that she was murdered by her associate; isn’t that right?

Yes.

You no longer feel responsible for her predicament, I hope.

No, I don’t.

Good.

I still wish I could remember. The only knowledge I have of my life back home is what my friends Aydin and Kent have told me. I still can’t remember anything on my own.

You can’t rush these things, Jack. We’ve still got a long road ahead of us.

But am I making any progress at all, Doctor? Or is this all in vain? Do you think I waited too long to seek help?

It’s never too late, Jack. And, yes, you have made progress. You’ve remembered the night of the fire. You’ve remembered Linda. You’re piecing some facts together.

I only seem to be remembering the negative things. I want to remember my happy memories. I want to remember my loved ones.

Have you had any new flashbacks about Sydney?

That image of her keeps playing over and over in my head...The one where we’re dancing to I Didn’t Know What Time It Was...I keep seeing her face everywhere.

Why have you made no attempt to contact her? I understand your hesitation when you were under the mistaken assumption that you were wanted by the police...Also when you were told by the Stephen fellow that you and he were lovers...And when you discovered Sydney had married your cousin...But, now, things are different. Your cousin has passed away. You’re no longer down and out. You’re financially secure.

I don’t want her to see me like this. I want her to remember me as the man I used to be...The man she loved. She’s obviously moved on. She fell in love with my cousin and she was no doubt devastated by his loss. It’s too late for the two of us.

You don’t know that. It’s been over seven years since you saw her last. Do you still love her?

I’ll always love Sydney.

Then, tell her.

I can’t...I want to get better, so I can be deserving of her.

Then, we have our work cut out for us. How do you feel about the fact that Sydney married your cousin? Do you feel resentful? Betrayed perhaps?

No. I’m glad that he was there for her. I’m grateful to him. He’s the reason I’m financially stable now. I wish he were still alive, so Sydney could be happy.

Do you feel undeserving of the money he bequeathed to you?

Yes.

Your cousin apparently cared about you very much. It was his wish that you receive his generous gift.

He should have lived. He should have had a lifetime with Sydney.

Jack, you’re an extraordinary man. But, my friend, the fact is, your cousin is dead. He wanted you to have this endowment. You need to accept this without guilt. As for Sydney, she has a right to know you’re all right and you have some memory of her. I understand you’re afraid of being hurt, but...

I’m not ready yet. I can’t reach out to her like this.

All right. We can revisit this later...Now, I would like to talk more about the relationships you’ve had since your tragic circumstances. First, there was Cicely, the nurse. Tell me more about her.

She was a wonderful girl. I was very happy with her. I really believed we could have had a future. But, as you know, it came to an end when the police showed up at the cabin where she and Ribby were hiding me from Dr. Mazot and my stepmother. I thought the police were after me because I had killed Linda, so I took off.

Then, you spent some time living on Skid Row...until Stephen found you and convinced you the two of you had been lovers. What was that period like?

I was very grateful to Stephen. He rescued me and gave me shelter. He found a job for me.

How did it feel to be intimate with him? Did you feel any physical attraction?

I didn’t, but it didn’t matter. He was good to me. I owed him. I was committed to him.

Then, the relationship came to an end.

Stephen started staying out at nights; then he was staying away for days at a time. We stopped communicating.

And, that is when your friends informed you about Stephen’s deception. How did that make you feel?

I was shocked...confused...

Were you angry?

Hurt, but not angry. I could understand how emotions can get in the way. I’m sure it must’ve been eating away at him all that time. And, later, when my cousin Tony died and his lawyer was trying to contact me at Stephen’s place, thinking we were still a couple, Stephen did the ethical thing and gave him Kent and Aydin’s number because they were the only ones who knew where I was. He could’ve just said he didn’t know my whereabouts, but he did the right thing. I have no ill will toward Stephen. I hope he’s resting in peace.

Were you upset when he died?

Of course. He was an unwitting victim of this horrific Aids epidemic. He had everything to live for and he was robbed of it. 

After your relationship with Stephen ended, you spent a few years in Idaho and almost got married.

I thought I could just fly under the radar and live a quiet, unassuming life there, but it didn’t work out that way.

What was your relationship like with the young lady you almost married?

It was nice at first. Ellie worked at the local diner. She was a cute, bubbly girl. I went to the diner for my dinner after a long day of working on the farm. She always saved me some apple pie. I really liked her. We dated for a while. I got her pregnant, so I stepped up and asked her to marry me.

What went wrong?

When Stephen was diagnosed with Aids, Kent phoned me and told me I needed to get tested. Ellie needed to get tested, too.

Both of your results came back negative.

Yes. But the damage was done. Ellie was fuming, and so were all the other people in the community. They wanted me gone. Some of them tried to run me over with their tractors. Some threatened me with rifles. I had to leave. Ellie had a secret abortion somewhere in another state, so no one would find out she had been carrying a monster’s baby.

Small communities are notoriously racist and homophobic, unfortunately. The idyllic life we seek comes with a high price.

I came back to New York because, with the money Tony left me, I can afford to live here now. This is the only place where I have friends. The voice and piano lessons I provide for kids in the Bronx give me so much fulfillment.

If it weren’t for Sydney, would you still be trying so hard to remember your past?

Probably not. But because of the feelings I experience when I think about her, I desperately want to unlock the memories of her and our relationship.

Do you feel stuck? Do you feel you can’t move on and form a new relationship because of this, as well as because of the negative experiences with Stephen and Ellie?

"I don’t