Another Kind of Diamond

Chapter One

Isabel woke up a little earlier this Saturday morning and for a late week-end starter it was hard getting adjusted. After a long time spent complaining to nobody, she went for some of the everyday things and was on it when her roommate’s voice reached her through the running tap as she continued with oral care. Breakfast is ready! Carissa yelled.

That has to wait till I’m done with shower roommate! Isabel responded struggling with paste in her mouth.

Ok babe! Take your time! I’ll clean up while you do that!

Eventually it was quite a while before both sat down to breakfast and as usual chattered with their meals. Babe something very important just knocked on my stupid mind’s door, Carissa said at a point in their chattering.

And what is that? Isabel asked, probing her roommate’s eyes.

The guest list for the party, remember? You promised we’ll go through it together before setting out for shopping.

Oh I remember, is just that we don’t have much time left ‘cause the bus will be arriving in 30 minutes and we need at list 20 to the bus stop. But don’t worry, I’ll grab it and we try to go through it with our walk. The girls then hurried and hit the street.

Just like she promised Isabel soon fished out a piece of paper from a back sack she carried where ever she went and began reading thorough a very long list. Desha, Shana, Anita, Wendy, Edna, Joslyn …

Stop right there! Carissa cuts it short. No! Not Joslyn! She is not coming!

What do you mean? I haven’t even gone anywhere with the list and you cut me off like that, Isabel reacted in surprise.

You heard me roommate or didn’t you? I said Joslyn isn’t coming. Carissa continued.

And who do you think you are to get in my business like that and ruin my breakfast ah? Carissa! Are we forgetting something here? This is my party, okay? And I’ll invite anyone I choose, okay?

Isabel I don’t believe you are saying this, Carissa continued.

Do you think I care? Isabel retorted in a hint of anger. You ought to know this belongs to none of Carissa’s business class, okay? ‘I’ve said it once and I’m saying it again, babe, I never allow anyone run my show no matter who you think you are, understand? I do as I please, that’s it! And like I said Joslyn will be there at my party, do you get that? I don’t even want to bug myself with how you feel about this.

You must be kidding me, right?

I ain’t kidding anybody, okay? And don’t ask me that silly question anymore Carissa.

Not after what she did to you, Isabel. I mean taking Jewie from you the way she did and you are telling me she is gonna be at your party. Now tell me some-n?

What more do you want to hear from me Carissa?

She might decide to come with Jewie, right?

What if she comes with Jewie? Isabel responded.

Think for a minute how that’s gonna hurt you.

I don’t care! Anyways they won’t even dare.

What are you talking about? Carissa pressed on. You remember Anita and how she broke up with Edwin ‘cause she caught him cheating with her best friend Shana. You remember that shit, right?

Ehen! I remember!

Edwin and Shana were at Anita’s birthday party together or have you forgotten?

Come to think of it, you’re right you know, Isabel admitted but even that was not enough reason to get her dancing along with her roommate but Carissa seized the chance and pressed on.

Listen Isabel, they don’t care these days, okay? Everyone out there is acting kinda crazy. They’re all wired! Anyways, may be Anita didn’t care that much about Edwin like you felt for Jewie, know what I’m saying?

I wasn’t really that much into him, okay? Besides Jewie belongs to the past now. He never meant that much to me. Isabel said this thinking her roommate will change her mind and drop the argument but Carissa was not relenting. I don’t even believe you are talking about Jewie like that she added instead.

What is your particular reason for saying that Carissa? Isabel was by now getting really worked up.

Oh come-on Isabel! You know you’re still in love with that guy, don’t you?

Is that how you feel? You are the one in love with that guy not Isabel.

Oh yes! You are in love for sure! Carissa continued.

Ok! Blab, blab, blab! Whatever! Whatever! Joslyn is still gonna be there at my party no matter what you say.

You are in denial Isabel, ‘cause something has gone wrong.

Now visibly angered by Carissa’s persistence, Isabel bellowed; what do you really know about me and Jewie, ah? And she turned to face her roommate.

That nightmare you used to have when you fight with him and then you’ll be imagining he’ll be gone with some other babe and will be crying and telling me how much you love him. Yeah! I still remember that shit, Carissa persisted.

I already heard enough of your nonsense Carissa. Anyways how is all that supposed to be your business, asshole? Ok! I probably was acting like that and stuff but that was then. Right now Jewie doesn’t mean anything to me anymore, feel me? The whole damn thing is old stuff now. Like they say, is history! Gone! That’s it! Finished with! Final! What more do you want me to say, ah?

I don’t know what I’m gonna do with you Isabel. Sometimes I wanna hate you, sometimes I wanna love you.

Good! That makes the two of us girlfriend. But right now I ain’t thinking about you and your little mind, nor am I thinking of that mother fucking kinda guy named Jewie ‘cause it is about me and how I’m gonna make my show shout out loud, understand? So you can go ahead and run your mouth the much you want, it’s still not gonna change a damn thing girlfriend.

And not wanting to agitate her roommate further, Carissa chose to water down the whole thing as she now said; I don’t really mean to bug you Isabel. Is just that I really thought you did care about that dud, seriously!

Why should I continue to care about a guy who left me in the middle of winter and ran off with a bitch? Isabel continued in her own attempt to let Carissa into her real feeling! Why? She insisted. Not when there are enough guys out there for a young babe like me. I’m gonna turn seventeen in a few weeks. Don’t you forget that! I’m holding my salesgirl’s job and I’ve a place to call my own. And you know some more, I pay my rent and take care of my shit, get what’ am saying. So tell me, what dud out there won’t wanna be with me, eh? I, Isabel got all that they need and everything they’ll always need ‘cause I take care of my shit. So babe right now I run the whole damn show my own way! That’s what it is. And you know the kinda game I play?

No babe! Tell me more about that! Carissa responded.

It is called grab them fast and drop them fast! Babe that’s my game ‘cause that’s what the time says on my time piece!

Great! Carissa reacted in excitement.

That’s the way it is supposed to be Roommate. Now Carissa don’t tell me you fall in love with guys and all that ‘cause that’s gonna make you even a worse fool than I thought, okay? You know why? It’s gonna hurt! Believe me! My mama did all that shit and lost out, okay? So, I’m not even thinking about getting myself into a thing like that, not this time babe. I’m just gonna go ahead and get me as much fun as I can get before gray start showing up ‘cause what all those duds out there want these days is you know ‘that thing’ and that’s all Isabel is gonna be asking for too. I ain’t even tripping!

Cool! I kind of like that. I want more though.

What more do you think you can get Carissa?

Babies! I’ve been trying to make someone a baby daddy, Carissa said giggling.

Someone like Teri ha! It is not so hard. All you need is do you know, get what am saying?

I know! I know! Carissa responded and continued giggling. I’m probably doing it the wrong way or not doing enough, understand?

There isn’t any wrong way or not doing enough about it babe? Once you get to a certain age and have sex with guys you get pregnant, period! Unless you get yourself some kind of protection like anti baby pills or something. You know, a plan A or B. Feel me!

Anti-baby pills! Yak! Sounds kind of wired! Isabel! Know what?

And what is it this time?

Not all girls get to be pregnant, though! Only cool babes like you and me make babies, Carissa added.

It has nothing to do with cool babes and stuff egg brain! Sometimes is just the way some babes are made and for that reason they can’t make babies. That was Isabel still trying so hard to instruct her roommate.

And some babes do it to themselves, get what I mean? Carissa responded.

Probably! Probably!

Isabel! Look at you! Carissa said as she got even more exited. Soon you gonna become a senior babe like me ‘cause you’re turning seventeen in three weeks and I can’t wait to welcome you on board.

Stone brain! We still have one year to go, okay! Eighteen fucking miserable years is what you got to wait before you even begin to think of yourself as an adult.

And what difference does it make? Carissa asked.

Baby! That’s when I’ll be free to do as I please, oh yeah! Sweet freedom! I can’t wait! And then I’m gonna take care of my shit the way I want ‘cause nobody got the right to get in my business unless I let them. Oh! I wonder how the days after that almighty initiation will turn out. I just can’t wait!

We started kind of early then ‘cause I just turned seventeen and you in three weeks. But see how we take care of business ourselves. Like share the rent for our apartment, buy our own cloths and shit. I mean we do everything we want to do ourselves and we carry on so well. That’s really fantastic, Carissa continued.

May be we’re some kind of rebellious kids or wired, I don’t know. I still can’t wait to turn eighteen though ‘cause I can’t even do half of all the shit I want to do on my own, get what I’m saying? Sometimes they are like, adult consent required and that’s it! Isabel added, chuckling.

I know! Carissa responded chuckling too as usual. Anyways I think we are doing just great. Re-be-li-us. What does that shit mean?

Quit acting dumb roommate ‘cause we need to step up or we miss our bus. It’ll be here in ten minutes, so we need walk faster, Isabel retorted.

Oh come-on! We’ve got a long time to while away babe! The bus stop isn’t that far!

Oops! Watch out Carissa! You almost got ran over by that car.

Damned stupid driver! He probably wants what I got, Carissa said and continued giggling.

May be you want what he’s got, okay? Isabel started yelling again. You need come over here and walk with me on the side walk ‘cause I don’t understanding why you keep getting in the way of the traffic and making it like fun business. Wow! Did you see that? He almost ran into another car. He’s in such a rush that I couldn’t even get to catch a good look at him. You know, I wanted to check him out babe and see if he is good looking, you know! Just for admiration thing.

He is running so wild ‘cause he wanna catch up with some date ‘cause that’s all they think about these days and can’t do any good stuff anymore like them grandfathers. Isabel! I just remembered something!

What?

Denyse!

What about Denyse? Isabel asked.

Is she coming to the party?

Carissa which of the Denyse are you talking about?

Denyse Goldman. Are you gonna let her come?

I don’t even wanna talk about that bitch! Isabel responded. Know what? It’s probably better not to let her ‘cause she’s been acting funny lately. Since she came back from some sort of camping stuff she said she went last June she’s been carrying herself like some kind of princess or something and I don’t like that.

Yes! Carissa picked up from where her roommate stopped. You’re right! You’re right! I saw her at the Movies some time ago and she was telling me about this girl she met at a camp and she said the girl’s name is Elisa and was saying all the nicest things in this world about this new girl. And then I noticed how she totally changed and acting kind of strange and I said in my mind is because of this new girl she is acting like that. She couldn’t even look me straight in the face, get what I mean. And she was in a hurry to get away from me so I did her the favor by taking myself out of her sight fast.

I don’t even care. She can meet whosoever she wants. I don’t give a damn! Isabel continued.

Remember how we all used to hang out, get high and be happy together? Carissa said. But these days she doesn’t even talk to anybody. I even went out of my style and called her several times sometime last month to see how she is doing but she neither picked my calls nor returned them.

Don’t even bother yourself about that idiot any more. Isabel picked it up again. I too ran into her on Wall Mart about two weeks ago but she pretended she didn’t see me. Anyways, I still went ahead and tried to be nice to her. You know, tried talking with her and all that but she kept on putting up this weird behavior like someone who embraced a new kind of religion or something. I went back to school you know she told me like she has become one of those movie stars, get what I am saying? She was really acting funny and that kinda pissed me off. One thing she doesn’t understand though is that I ain’t got patient for that bullshit she is hawking all over the place. No, not Isabel! And then she was with this tall girl who was standing by her like a hulk and since I didn’t wanna be eaten raw, I walked away while I’m still alive.

That must be Elisa right there! Carissa exclaimed.

I don’t give a damn! Isabel insisted. Anyways I’ve quit trying to be nice to her and all that shit and moved on. I never even try wasting my minutes on that bitch anymore. Come to think of it, we don’t really need her.

Yeah! Good riddance to bad rubbish! Carissa continued. All she did was force herself on us anyways ‘cause we never considered her a real friend, get what I’m saying! She didn’t blend with our juice real good, right?

Oh sure! She was way off the mark! Yet we still tried to be nice and all that. But with the way she is acting now, she is gone for good. We‘re never gonna mess with her again, ever!

Elizabeth Highlands is coming for sure, right? Carissa asked giggling again.

You mean the Doctor’s kid? Isabel asked jovially.

Yeah!

Oh sure! Isabel said with some giggle too.

She is one hell of a quire kid you know. Her dad is a medical doctor and I heard he works twenty four seven in one of those hospital and you know what that means, right? Carissa said.

Lots of money for sure! And she spends it too! She bought Anita a whole set of suitcase from one of those expensive stores for a birth day gift, Isabel added.

She buys for everybody, get what I’m saying? Laughter from both girls followed before Carissa continued. You remember those gold earrings she gave me for a sung? We were all hanging out and I saw this beautiful pair of gold on her ears, you know? All I did was say how nice they looked and bam! Carissa became the owner of gold earrings for the first time in my life. She was like, do you want them? And I screamed, yes! And she took them off right away and gave them to me. Just like that!

I Know! She is wired. Her mom is home all the time trying to help out but she never gives a damn Isabel pressed on.

That’s true. If I had that kinda dad with lots of dough and a mom like hers I’ll probably be in school still.

Oh my God, the bus is almost here! Look behind you! Isabel shouted!

Baby, you’ve got one of a kind pair of eyes! We need to run for it this time or we miss it! Carissa said.

I warned you we needed to step up but you wouldn’t listen, now you want me to start running and I don’t know how fast we gonna run to catch up with a moving bus. Look the fool you made of yourself Carissa!

Isabel we can give it a try! So keep running!

I’m doing what I can, okay? Don’t even try making me go any faster than I’m doing already, alright? Oh no! Is no use! It is already on its stand and there is no way we can catch up with it now, so I quit, Isabel said and slowed down.

Babe, don’t do that! Carissa persisted. We can still make it! Keep running! We are almost there! See, I almost touched the big thing. Yeah!

But those who have the mind to know the right time to leave their homes and get to the bus stop on time already got in and the bus full, ok? Babe look at the damn thing with your blind eyes and you’ll see it’s slowly moving away. It is not gonna stay there waiting for Carissa ‘cause that’s what you call public transportation, okay? It is leaving!

Yeah! You’re damned right. We missed it alright. Let’s wait for another one, okay?

Is gonna take about an hour before the next bus gets here Carissa!

We got no choice babe? It’s either we choose to wait or we take another long walk back home. Anyways, it is up to you Isabel, ‘cause I’m not going to the store to shop for my own stuff and you know that. The only reason I’m out here right now is ‘cause of you, don’t you forget that, Carissa said.

And how are you helping me out now, ah? Isabel responded.

We ain’t got to the store yet! Carissa continued.

And you already sat down without even thinking how I’m feeling about this whole shit! Anyways, since is gonna take a while before the bus gets here, I wanna take out my ear piece and listen to some tunes, okay? So go ahead and pretend I don’t exist. Still searching for the piece, Isabel heard Carissa shout out, I kinda sat on something!

I know you won’t let me alone, Isabel bellowed. What is it you sat on that is so bad you can’t bear?

I don’t know. May be a kinda book or something, Carissa said and took out whatever it is and began flipping through some pages of a magazine until she got to a particular spot and tried reading out some names. D.r Jos…Jos…lyn Je…far..son. An..to..ny Mar..great Will..son………

Give me that, Isabel said snatching the so called book off Carissa’s hand. This is no book roommate. It’s what you call a Magazine, understand? How come you can’t even read a damn thing? What’s wrong with you Carissa, are you dumb or something?

You don’t have to scream at me, okay? Carissa who hardly gets mad with her roommate reacted this time with a slight hint of self-defense.

Let me see! Oh! Dr. Joslyn Jefferson, Attorney Margret Wilson. What’s this shit talking about anyways? Isabel said and looked up the caption. Oh! One Hundred Great American Women Achievers Good! Sounds kind of cute!

What’s that?

Something about some babes that did something they wanna talk about in a magazine.

Something like what?

Here you start asking dumb ass questions again Carissa. Anyways, they kind of became Doctors, Attorneys, Music babes and stuffs like that. They did some good.

How do they do all that? I mean get to do all those kind of shit and stuff, Carissa asked.

They stay in school and study so hard. That’s how they do it, dumb fool!

That must be kinda miserable life, ha? You know what I think? Isabel you are one of them ‘cause you are so smart! See how you do every damn thing better than I do! Tell me something! Did you get to finish high school or something?

I don’t wanna talk about it! Isabel retorted.

How come you never say a thing about yourself, eh? Ok, if you must know I dropped out, what about you? Carissa continued.

Didn’t you hear me say I don’t wanna talk about it damned fool?

It doesn’t matter! It doesn’t matter, Carissa added. But tell me some, how do people get to stay in school and all that, study hard and get to be called some kind of quire sounding names and stuff? I mean they gonna miss out in all the fun we’ll be getting. I don’t get it! And what are they gonna do with all that funny sounding names. I can’t do myself like that! Damn! Now listen to this! There is this old Aunt of mine who lives in New Port Beach.

Oh yeah!

Yeah! Nice place, big house, cozy furniture, clean neighborhood, green fields. And babe when I say green grass? I mean green! That mama sure lives the life!

For real!!

Yeah! She is a retired what they call RN, Carissa continued. She said it’s short for a Registered Nurse and she always told me how hard she worked in her time to earn all she got. And from all I heard her say, she worked so hard that sometimes I wept for her. A whole lot of shit that Mama used to feed into my fucking brain anyways! It was always, Child this or Child that and she would go on and on. Sometimes when she gets into one of those happy moments she gets into for no reason, she will be like, child! Life is like a package handed to you right from your mama’s womb but it begins to unwrap the moment you are born. It is a secret package though, so you never know what is inside but then it opens in very tiny, tiny bits as you go along. But the thing is that each of the tiny bits that open right before your eyes is a whole lot of jigsaw puzzle that you got to figure out. Child, that’s what life is all about, solving puzzles. And you got to be real smart, you got to be wise and need lots of sense to do that! That means watch, listen, and discipline yourself to search and learn. Yeah! She said that shit to me every time and I guess that was to make Carissa work her butt off but I wasn’t even thinking about anything like that.

Hum! Interesting Isabel reacted!

And there is this other little something she talked about every damned day. I don’t even remember a day that went by without her saying this same shit to me. Child, always remember this, I don’t want you to wind up like your mama she will say and I’ll go never! And she’ll be like, remember how she abandoned you and ran off with that low down, God forsaken, good for nothing, miserable, damned old boy friend of hers to Maryland and your grand ma had to work her ass to raise you? Thanks to that good man the good Lord gave to mother that saw her through those difficult days. My dad was a good man and I loved them both very much. Oh yes! I did! May the good Lord continue to bless their souls in their resting places? Give me Old- School anytime, oh yeah! And then, I heard that mother fucking bastard of a man latter abandoned your mom and walked away, just like that? I always want you to remember all that. Child I want you to go back to school, stay there until you graduate. I’ll see to it that you get all the help you need if you decide to do the right thing so don’t worry about the fees ‘cause I’ll take care of that from start to finish. Then after that you settle down and decide what you wanna do. I guess that was another of her style of trying to get me does what she wants. She always tells me about this thing she calls CNA.

That’s no big deal! I know what that means. It is the short for a Certified Nursing Assistant, Isabel said.

Yeah! Who thought you that? Babe you are one hell of a smart cookie! So you know that too? You understand every damn thing in this world Isabel. Anyways, my Aunt used to talk to me a lot about that stuff. And the way she talked about it was like I could just go in and grab it if I wanted.

You think that’s so easy. I sometimes think about going back to school though but I just don’t think sitting in a class room all day long is cool, Isabel continued.

And what are you gonna read if it happens?

I don’t know!

Anyways that CNA stuff like you said may be hard but lots of babes still do it, right? Carissa continued.

For sure! It always comes in handy as a start, get what I’m saying? Then you work your way up from there. You know the lady next door?

Which one?

Don’t you remember anything Carissa? There is only one Lady in the apartment next door.

Oh! Oh! You mean here she goes again! Carissa said, giggling gain.

Is that what you call her?

Isabel what else do you want me call her, eh? I mean, she is always on the go! Always! She is on that damned nursing uniform of hers twenty-four-seven. I tell you something girlfriend, l have never seen her in any other damned fucking cloth ‘cause she works every minute of her life. I think she also goes to school or something ‘cause I see some kind of a name of one of those nasty colleges scribed on some of those damned old fashioned Nursing Uniform she flags all over the places. Does she have time for any other stuff in her life? Like when does she eat, sleep, poo or even get some loving, get what I’m saying. She is a workaholic and I can’t just do myself like that. Damn!

Girl! Quit running your mouth like hell, okay? Isabel continued. To get some you need to do some, alright? I see she shop a lot and I heard she is moving to her own house at the end of this month ‘cause she bought her own home. Oh yeah babe, she bought her own home and she can’t do that if she can’t pay that little thing called mortgage, okay? That’s how it works babe?

That’s not right though. How can she pay for all that on a CNA check?

She works every minute of the day, remember? I tell you again, to get some, babe you got to do some!

Isabel I don’t understand you sometimes. I don’t even think I’ll ever understand you. Are you taking sides with the lady next door or what? You don’t even know her that much, so what’s your problem, eh?

Stop! Don’t even go there Carissa? I’m trying to help you here, okay? You never seem to get anything right and I’m sick and tired of that shit! Isabel said, visibly angry now.

You’re right. I’m a dumb asshole! Carissa said in a low tune. I already know that so you don’t have to keep reminding me, okay? What time is it anyways?

By Isabel’s estimate it would take another ten minutes before the bus comes around but she went in search of it with her eyes anyways. Surprisingly she found it approaching the last light before the Bus Stop where the girls waited so the announcement. She hardly finished her statement before the bus came to a halt right in front of them and they got in. It was almost full such that both were forced to sit in separate seats.

The rest of the journey was made more with their eyes than with their mouth. Carissa couldn’t take her eyes off a baby Mama with her two kids sitting in front of her. She continued observing, recording and enjoying every single move that mama was making on that bus as the journey continued.

As for Isabel she kept herself busy with the Magazine they found. She tried to look at each of the pictures of the one Hundred women achievers but one particular case was really outstanding, so outstanding that she gazed at it until their final stop on Crenshaw and Century.

Carissa! Carissa! She called out twice at the girl who lost herself to the admiration of the baby mamas. Carissa, are you deaf? She moved close enough to give her a little nudge on her back.

Startled, Carissa exclaimed, what’s up girlfriend?

This is our stop. Did you forget or something?

Oh! Yeah! You’re right Carissa said and sprang on her feet and both had to literally rush out of the bus that was almost carrying them along its journey.

Do we need the 111? Carissa asked the moment they got out.

I don’t think so. That’s Ross right there. It isn’t that far.

You’re right smart girl. Ross is a little stroll ahead.

Good! At list you noticed! Isabel said scornfully.

Stop talking to me like that Isabel. I may be dumb but I see whatever I wanna see. The damn bus was jam parked with lots of baby mamas. Yes! I noticed. You didn’t miss that, did you?

How could I?

Good! There was this one sitting right in front of me and I couldn’t take my eyes off her. Carissa continued. You saw her with her two little cuties, right? I kinda liked the way she talked to her girl in a command sort of. Some-n like, sit down right there! And the girl sat down right away. That’s what I’m talking about girlfriend! It is the thing that gives me the kick about this baby mom some-n. Babe, it kinda gives what is called respect and I want that. Yeah, I kinda want respect! And then I won’t even have to do nothing for myself no more, get what I’m saying? New: No boring damned job. No way! I’ll be picking up government check straight from the bank! Yeah! That’s all I’ll be doing girlfriend! And then, ‘I’m gonna’ do the TV and movies all the time. And the beauty pallor never gonna miss me ‘cause they’ll see me each day the sun light shines in the sky. And after I get myself done real good I go hang out with some guys. And you know what? I’m never gonna miss any damn party stuff ‘cause wherever it’s happening, folks gonna see me there live, shining like the stars. And then I’ll hit the club anytime I wanna buggy down. I’m gonna do hard liquor and the damned weed all day long. Baby that’s what you call sweet life! And then when the baby is growing in your stomach you kind of look like this, and carry yourself like that, she demonstrated. Baby, what won’t I give for that pose? I long for it real bad!

And when the baby is born, better get you some ear pads and lots of coffee ‘cause in place of your fancy pose all you’ll be getting will be shrills in baby cries and serious nods from sleep. And know what? You’ll barely have enough time to go shopping for your coffee and baby stuff pushing your baby all over the places in her pram talk more of night clubs. Besides government money is never gonna get you anywhere, okay? ‘Cause you stay put on same sport all your life. I tell you what I think? The baby mamas I saw in that damned bus need someone to tell them they got it all wrong! Bullshit! Isabel added.

What do you mean and how dare you say that Isabel? They don’t need nothing from nobody ‘cause they already have all the help they can get and take care of their babies real good.

Come-on now Carissa! Don’t tell me that ‘cause I know it’s really hard on them, okay? Did you get to take a good look at their miserable faces? How does a girl our age or younger take care of two babies? Tell me!? Especially when the daddy is nowhere to be found! Daddy is probably baby daddy himself and no man can raise a family at fourteen. They get them pregnant and disappear to go be with their own mama at home. Then turn around and get them another fucking stupid bitch and don’t even understand what they are doing. That’s what it is, okay? These so called baby mamas are kids themselves but take a closer look at any of them when next you see one and you’ll notice she is already worn out like some kinda grand ma, Shit!

Yeah! I’m sure the one sitting in front of me with her two kids is probably sixteen or even younger but she is doing well though! She had no problems holding both of her kids. She is ok! Carissa continued.

Oh no! You don’t know what you are talking about Carissa! She had problem holding both of her kids ‘cause I noticed too, okay? Looking like a piece of shit at her age, that speaks volumes if you don’t know. She is suffering from self-neglect for sure. Besides, she is missing out on what her peers are getting right now and that’s not funny at all ‘cause there will be no second chance! And let me tell you some more, a baby mama will always be a baby all her life ‘cause she never gave herself chance to grow up. At sixty, she’s wanna be with twenty years old guy ‘cause she will be forever seeking to catch up with time. You know why? Is because she never gave herself chance to be loved! She only lives in the illusion of it and then wears herself out in misery and then winds up spending all the little money she gets from welfare on younger guys trying to buy what she refused to get naturally. But hey lady! You can’t buy love! Oh no! So give it up! Is gone and never gonna come back! Let it go! Let’s be honest here, very few guys our age will fall in love with a woman old enough to be their Mama. It’s crazy! When he is your son’s or daughter’s age, no bound is ever gonna happen, okay? Sounds to me like make believe, get what I’m saying? You work too hard and get faked love in return. It’s hardly true ‘cause someone must be doing some behind someone’s back. These babes and the guys need to think again.

Look! Look in front of you, Carissa said. Here comes another one pushing her baby pram.

Nay! She’s way too young. She couldn’t be more than thirteen or fourteen. No! This is very wrong. Isabel added.

Stop that Isabel! Is not that bad! Carissa continued in her quest to justify her reasoning. Look! Is like she has her grand ma helping out ‘cause that woman walking with her is too old to be her mama. Yeah Isabel! This reminds me of something else. Where the hell are the mamas? I always see grandmas doing stuff for them little grand girls these days. Where are the mamas?

They take care of business, okay? And that is because there are not so many guys to run the homes any more so they do it by themselves, Isabel explained further. Some mamas are still in school and others out there having fun. I mean, how old do you think mom to a fourteen years old baby mama will be?

I don’t know, responded Carissa.

Ok! Probably twenty six or twenty eight, cause baby mamas begot baby mamas. And how do you become a grand ma at twenty six. It is hard men! They don’t think. This is what is called dis- function and Isabel can’t do herself like that. They make babies and suddenly don’t want them and what happens next. They either hands up to willing grand ma or dump the babies, but why? If you don’t like it, don’t do it, period! I don’t understand. Plan A or B is over the counter! It’s easy! I’m not saying I’m of any good though but get me to be a baby mama? Hell no! I guess I’m far too smart for that shit!

Come-on! You can’t bet on that Isabel ‘cause you never know.

I know myself well enough, okay? Whatever problem I got with drug and stuff is cool ‘cause we all need some to keep up with this weird world, get what I’m saying.

I know! And the daddies don’t work hard any more like back in the days. What’s really going on? Not all of them though! Some still wanna be the man but some are nothing but assholes.

Carissa don’t even go there ‘cause I don’t wanna talk about that, okay? Never talk to me about this daddy stuff again, understand?

Ok! Ok! We are inside the store now so quit yelling!

Both of the girls soon lost themselves amidst variety of choices in beautiful clothes, shoes and accessories. Isabel was particularly thrilled by the kind of cloths showcased on those shelves so she knew instantly she was sure to get something of her taste. Carissa stood behind her, helping out all the way, and they went about turning and looking up as many cloths as possible.

Yeah! That’s why I love Rosses. Is the mother of all the fucking stores, understand? If you wanna shop for good stuff people like you and me can afford, this is the do place. While Carissa was still talking, Isabel intruded, I found it, she exclaimed.

What? Carissa asked and moved closer to her roommate.

Do you have those little things that stick out by the sides called ears? I said I found it, dummy

Which one? Carissa asked

This one! Isabel exclaimed.

Bring it out let me see! Damn!

It is red, topless and wickedly short. This dress on high heel shoes will get them heads not only spinning but falling off their shoulders. That’s the one. It is like they already knew what Isabel had in mind and had it ready, waiting for me!

Wow! It’s fabulous, Carissa confirmed. I love it. Nice stuff! Nice stuff! What size do you wear?

Twenty-two! I’m too fat right? I know you must be a size four or some-n! Isabel continued.

I don’t even know how I get to be this thin ‘cause I eat like a damned horse, Carissa continued.

You’re one hell of a lucky girl Carissa! I see you eat all the time and wonder about it myself. How come this babe never put on some flesh? But some people are made like that and you are one of them. I kind of saw it in one of these movies, something about a naughty Professor.

I know! It’s a nice movie! I went to see it with Teri and both of us couldn’t stop laughing. It kind of teaches you some though. People can’t change the way they are made ‘cause they just can’t. Carissa added.

Know what? I think we hold on to the red dress but search a little more ‘cause there might be something even more beautiful out there, Isabel suggested.

And both went on a little longer turning and looking up more clothes. At long last they concluded that the red dress is the one and only. I settle for the red one Isabel announced. You do want something for yourself, don’t you?

I got something already. Carissa said and showed Isabel a nice top.

That’s lovely. Carissa! Know what? when it comes to fashion, girl you got the knowhow. You’ll make a good model you know.

What is a model supposed to do? Carissa asked like always.

Some fashion designers dress you up real good and put you out to help them make people buy them stuff.

Guys like using certain kind of girls to run that kind of shit like show girl stuff, right? And I know I’m not a certain kind of girl, Carissa said.

Don’t blame anything on certain kind of girls, okay? Just say your behind is too lazy to do any real stuff.

Yeah! You’re right. I think I’ve got this small sort of mind that thinks my little needs are already met so I don’t just go looking for more, Carissa continued.

You see! You just act dumb but you know exactly what you do. Anyways let’s go get some shoes, okay? And I might wanna get some jewelry too. I’ve been saving a long time for this day and now that is finally here I wanna make the best of it, Isabel said and the girls went searching. Soon they found the kind of shoes Isabel wanted, the jewelries were particularly picked by Carissa before they went, paid and headed for home.

It was a very busy store and Carissa couldn’t stop chattering about her experience as usual. It’s like all the babes in LA shop at Rosses she continued as they walked towards the bus stop on their way home! Did you see that girl spotting crazy orange hair color?

Yes! Isabel responded. I also wondered how she was gonna pick what she wanted in those sunglasses inside a store and both girls laughed at that. Anyways I ain’t mad at her ‘cause I think is all about what you call positive attitude. You know, sometimes you need to be different. That kinda empowers.

I don’t know about that, Carissa added. What I remembered is that she almost ran me over trying to force her way like she wanna walk through me or something and when I talked to her about it she wanted to start with me but I said nothing ‘cause I don’t ever wanna get into Police issues, get what I mean?

Carissa, why didn’t you talk to me about it when it happened, ah? I don’t even care about this Police thing or anything like that ‘cause anyone who wanna mess with you better get ready to mess with me too and I’m gonna fight with everything I got. I know you don’t talk back at people when they talk mean to you and that’s why they be doing you like that. But I’ve told you many times that your trouble is mine. The ones you don’t even want I’ll buy. Yeah! Bring it on! Baby, I’m gonna fight for you with the last drop of blood running my fucking veins, don’t forget that! Isabel said.

I already know that! Carissa continued. And I’m gonna do everything I can for you too. I’m gonna be there for you always no matter what ‘cause we only got each other. Tell me some, what’s the plan for the evening?

I already talked to my date. He’ll be coming at about 6 this evening.

I better call up Teri then. Carissa responded and dialed up her boyfriend while Isabel waited as they conversed.

What did he say? Isabel wanted to know.

He’s coming. He always does! He said he is gonna go get some of you know ‘Snow white’ and be on his way. Sounds like is gonna be a crazy night, ha? Carissa said.

May be! Freddy is the name of the guy I called but I’m not gonna let him stay long. Isabel said. The only reason I want him to night is because Wallis is not gonna make it on time ‘cause he is out of State. So I thought this is my chance to see this Freddy of a guy, you know. He is been bugging me a long time and I kept turning him down but now he wanna bribe me with something. I don’t know what it is, but I’m curious so I’m gonna seize the chance. He better shows up with some good