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    Willakaville: Amazing Adventures of Astronomical Awesomeness
    Willakaville: Amazing Adventures of Astronomical Awesomeness
    Willakaville: Amazing Adventures of Astronomical Awesomeness
    Ebook161 pages1 hour

    Willakaville: Amazing Adventures of Astronomical Awesomeness

    By Bald Guy

    ()

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    About this ebook

    Why is all the toilet paper disappearing? Will Kyle escape the banana warriors? Can Marty save everyone from the mushroom zombies?

    Find the answers inside Willakaville: Amazing Adventures of Astronomical Awesomeness. Follow intelligent children as they solve supernatural issues and find out about themselves along the way.

    The book is full to the brim with time machines, magic, mayhem, aliens, cats, mystery, secrets, strange lands, rockets, evil villains, and a pencil.

    If you are into action, adventure and awesomeness, this is the book for you!

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherBald Guy
    Release dateJan 28, 2015
    ISBN9781310408670
    Willakaville: Amazing Adventures of Astronomical Awesomeness
    Author

    Bald Guy

    Mathew Heinecke is an emerging author of children's books. He enjoys making up wacky science fiction stories and poems for his children. His Willakaville series books have put these in print for others to enjoy with the goal of tackling the many different issues children will face. (He wants to ensure he is using the full spectrum of his imagination)As a graduate from the University of Utah with a Bachelor's of Science degree in Mechanical Engineering, he has worked for many years as a mechanical engineer in both the aerospace and transportation industries. This coincides with his passion for learning about new technologies and innovations. (He really wants to be a galactic space fighter)Mathew grew up in Salt Lake City, Utah where he enjoyed visiting the nearby Rocky Mountains and the colorful landscapes of southern Utah. As a child, he played several sports such as; football, soccer, rugby, basketball, snowboarding, skiing, hiking, fishing mountain biking, golf and tennis. Now he just plays a little golf and tennis (and has a small protrusion of his belly to show for it) He continues to enjoy sports and time outdoors with his wife, children and friends.Some of Mathew's hobbies include: illustration, painting, t-shirt and logo design, gardening, and movies. (He likes to keep busy) His favorite movies are Star Wars and The Lord of the Rings.

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      Book preview

      Willakaville - Bald Guy

      Willakaville

      Amazing Adventures of Astronomical Awesomeness

      By Mathew Heinecke

      (aka Bald Guy)

      Text Copyright © 2015 Bald Guy

      All Rights Reserved

      Dedicated to those I love:

      Celine, Anaïs, & Malone

      Warning!

      This book has tons of crazy stories. Read at your own risk. Bald Guy and Willakaville shall not be held responsible for any of the following:

      Falling asleep while reading

      Feeling sad from a sad story

      Thinking you’re invincible

      Having extreme anger at a villain

      Enduring lack of sleep due to compulsive reading

      Doing dumb things that are not related to anything

      Meeting mean people doing mean things

      Encountering catastrophic weather

      Having smelly feet

      Enduring laughter bellyaches

      Doing things you should not be doing

      Having an overactive imagination

      Contemplating your navel

      Receiving paper cuts, or other stuff.

      Seriously, I welcome any and all feedback, questions, suggestions, comments, jokes, recipes, and whatever else.

      Thank you,

      Bald Guy

      [email protected]

      Help Me

      Tomatozilla

      Behaving Badly

      Transformation

      Secret Passage

      A Wish from a Fish

      Freaky Freddie

      The Mushroom Virus

      Toilet Paper Caper

      Native Dreams

      A Cat Is

      Magic Pencil

      Digital Dilemma

      Amayonaising

      You Can’t Say That

      Spaced Out

      Help Me

      Willakaville looked like any normal place you could see when travelling across the country. Everyone there lived in regular homes. There were typical people going to work and ordinary kids playing outside. It was everything you expected to see in a small town. However, there constantly seemed to be something strange going on. You will see what I mean after I tell you this story.

      Billy was a run-of-the-mill twelve-year-old boy. He had average looks, average height, average weight, average intelligence, average skills at sports, and was average at everything else. He never did more or less than he was supposed to do.

      On the way to school, Billy always walked with his friend Charley. They took the same path down the hill and across the bridge. It was not far, probably less than a mile, and took them only about five minutes to get there.

      Charley was less than average in some ways and more than average in others. He was short, clumsy, and nerdy looking. On the other hand, he was smart, funny, and very fast.

      Their day started out with Billy knocking on Charley’s door. Charley came out, and they began their walk to school. Being clumsy, Charley tripped on the sidewalk and fell flat on his belly. Everything from his backpack fell out. Pencils, pens, books, papers, an old sock, and two sticks of gum splattered across the concrete and grass.

      Billy sighed as he helped his friend pick up all of his gear. He groaned, Charley, why don’t you ever remember to zip up your backpack? Once a week we go through this.

      Charley replied in his tiny voice, I know, I know. I just get in a hurry and forget.

      Why don’t you prepare your backpack at night like I do?

      Charley answered, hanging his head low, You’re right. Guess I will never learn.

      Don’t worry, keep your head up.

      Even though Charley sometimes frustrated him, he knew Charley was a great friend. He helped Billy at school and Billy helped him with his self-esteem.

      They continued their walk. Heading down the hill, they heard a strange noise. It sounded like a little mouse at first. The noise got louder and louder until they reached the bottom of the hill. Then they heard a tiny Help me! Help me!

      Both boys looked around. However, neither of them could see anyone.

      Down here! the little voice cried.

      They both looked down. Inside a small crack in the sidewalk was a tiny black ant waving his legs back and forth.

      I am stuck, the ant said. Can you please help?

      Billy and Charley could not believe their eyes (or ears). How was it possible for an ant to be talking to them?

      Charley decided to speak first. Hello, Mr. Ant. How can we help you?

      The ant stopped waving his legs and said, I got stuck on this piece of old chewing gum. Can you help me out?

      Charley replied, Okay, let me look. He got down on the ground and looked closely. Sure enough, the ant’s back legs were stuck to some chewing gum. Hmm, he said as he pondered how to get the ant unstuck. I will try, but no promises. He then proceeded to take out a pencil and used it to pry the gum and the ant from the crack.

      Be careful. Don’t hurt me, please, the ant pleaded.

      Charley loved all animals, including insects. He had to find a way to help the ant, especially a talking ant. Then he remembered what he learned in science class about solids, liquids, and temperature. If he could make the gum cold, it would become more solid and less sticky, and the ant should be free.

      Hold on, he said. I got an idea.

      This whole time, Billy just stood there frozen with his jaw open. Even when a bug flew in his mouth, he did not budge.

      But Charley didn’t notice. He was too busy trying to help the ant. He reached in his backpack and rustled around for a few seconds. Finally, he pulled out an ice pack from his lunch. He always put one in there to keep his yogurt cool—he hated warm yogurt. He then placed the gum on the ice pack. After a few minutes, the gum became hard, and the ant wiggled his way free.

      Thank you so much, he said. You saved my life.

      Billy came out of his daze, spit the bug out, and asked, How did you learn to talk?

      I didn’t, said the ant. Ants cannot talk. We do not have vocal cords.

      Billy and Charley stared at each other, squinching up their noses with questioning looks.

      The ant laughed and said, Look up.

      Both boys raised their heads to see a little man about two feet tall sitting on a branch high in a tree. He was dressed in all-white robes, had pure white skin, deep blue eyes, and no hair on his body.

      With a low voice, the man said, It was I who was speaking to you as if I were the ant. I wanted to see if you two were worthy enough.

      Worthy enough for what? said Charley. He and Billy slowly backed away as they waited for the answer.

      Worthy enough for the Gignoshlopz Award. It’s an award given to a being who shows exemplary kindness. Here is your prize.

      Then the little man made two jars of mayonnaise appear at the feet of the boys.

      Now before you thank me, I need to sing you a little song. He continued his words in a slow melody: Blortz blortz gignoshlopz porp. Right after the word porp, he farted very loudly and disappeared.

      The two boys instantly began laughing uncontrollably. They were both rolling on the ground for at least three minutes.

      Billy laughed. Did you see?

      What in the world? answered Charley, giggling.

      After settling down, they got up, grabbed their jars of mayonnaise, and headed for school. They didn’t care at all about going to their boring old school since they had a great story to tell. They knew no one would believe them, even with the jars of mayonnaise as evidence. Nevertheless, they told the story anyway and got several laughs that day.

      Now you know how it all started. The weirdness in Willakaville just got weirder and weirder. If you want to hear more about it, read the next chapter.

      Tomatozilla

      It was a calm Saturday morning. Most people were still in their beds. Birds were chirping, the grass was still wet with dew, and the sky was blue, absent of a single cloud.

      Jimmy Stickleworth woke up early, just as he did every Saturday. He really enjoyed the morning—it was time alone and just for him. He could relax. No sister to bother him. No mom to tell him what to do. No dad to make him clean up. No homework to do. Just him watching the robins catch worms outside, and eating his Magic Marshmallows cereal.

      He daydreamed about being an astronaut travelling to distant worlds that harbored strange creatures like the Flizzler. The Flizzler had the wings of an eagle and a long, fish-like body. It was white and covered with black circles along the side. In his imagination, it flew gracefully overhead. Then, an alien craft filled the sky, and he had to make a run for his spaceship. The aliens spotted him and turned their ships around. They were closing in. He almost made it to his ship. Then…BOOM!

      Jimmy was so startled that he actually felt the house shake. He looked up. The ground in his backyard opened and something big, REALLY BIG, was rising out of it. He could only see the top. It was red, shiny, and round. As it rose higher and higher, he realized what it was: a giant tomato!

      When it climbed out, he was astounded to see it had arms and legs, was larger than his house, and came bearing a mouth full of fangs. It turned, looked at him, and let out a humungous roar, shaking all the windows.

      He almost peed in his pants—he was so scared. He had no idea what to do. He just froze like the snowball

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