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    Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 104, February 4, 1893
    Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 104, February 4, 1893
    Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 104, February 4, 1893
    Ebook82 pages37 minutes

    Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 104, February 4, 1893

    By F. C. (Francis Cowley) Burnand

    ()

    Read preview
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherArchive Classics
    Release dateNov 26, 2013
    Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 104, February 4, 1893

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      Book preview

      Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 104, February 4, 1893 - F. C. (Francis Cowley) Burnand

      The Project Gutenberg EBook of Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 104,

      February 4, 1893, by Various

      This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with

      almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or

      re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included

      with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org

      Title: Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 104, February 4, 1893

      Author: Various

      Editor: Francis Burnand

      Release Date: February 6, 2007 [EBook #20538]

      Language: English

      *** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK PUNCH ***

      Produced by Matt Whittaker, Juliet Sutherland and the

      Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net

      PUNCH,

      OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

      Vol. 104.

      FEBRUARY 4, 1893.

      WHEN A MAN DOES NOT LOOK HIS BEST.

      Burglar (taking the ground heavily). Naow, 'ooever'd 'a' thought o' the Howner o' that there hinnercent little Villa bein' a Perfessional 'Chucker-hout'?!!!

      LAMENT OF THE (WOULD-BE) IRISH EMIGRANT.

      (Latest Version, with apologies to Lady Dufferin.)

      [Senator Chandler, in The North-American Review, recommends that immigration into the United States should be suspended, at least for a year.]

      Oi'm sittin' on the stile, Mary, an' lookin' o'er the tide,

      An' by jabers Oi'm afraid, Aroon, that there Oi'll have to bide!

      The grass is springin' fresh an' green in Ould Oireland, but oh moy!

      If there's any green in Jonathan's land, it is not in his oi!

      The States are awful changed, Mary; it is not now as then,

      When they lifted a free latch-string to all exiled Oirishmen.

      Now we miss the whoop ov welcome; they suggest it's loike our cheek,

      And Oi'm listenin' for brave Lowell's words—which Chandler does not speak!

      It seems to me their Aigle for full Freedom no more pants,

      And the Senator, he mutthers ov degraded immigrants.

      Says they can't assimilate us; faix, the wurrud sounds monstrous foine,

      But Oi fancy that it's maning is, We mane to draw the loine!

      Shure, we're ignorant and debased, dear; and the poor won't now find friends

      Even in free Columbia! So 'tis thus the ould boast ends!

      Stop 'em—for a year, says Chandler; "we'll be holding our Big Show,

      An' poverty, an'—well, Cholera, are not wanted thin, you know."

      It's an artful move, my Mary, but, it stroikes me, a bit thin,

      And it won't come home consolin', to the poor ov Adam's kin.

      Faix! they won't stop 'cabin passengers,' big-wigs, an' British Peerage,

      But—they don't want the poor devils that crowd over in the steerage!

      So Oi'm sittin' on the stile, Mary, and there Oi'll loikely sthop,

      For they don't require poor Paddy in their big new Chandler's Shop.

      Uncle Sam's some punkins, Mary, but he's not a great green goose;

      An' he's goin' to sthop a braggin' ov that latch-string always loose!

      MIXED NOTIONS—NO. IV. EGYPT.

      Two Well-Informed Men, an Inquirer, and an Average Man, in suburban morning train to London.

      First Well-Informed Man (reading his paper). Oh, I say, dash it, this'll never do. Here's this young Khedive of Egypt kicking up a shine, and dismissing British Ministers. We can't have that, you know.

      Inquirer. What Ministers has he dismissed?

      First

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