"K" is for Killer: A Kinsey Millhone Novel
By Sue Grafton
4/5
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Investigation
Private Investigation
Friendship
Secrets & Lies
Family Relationships
Amateur Detective
Femme Fatale
Hard-Boiled Detective
Whodunit
Family Secrets
Amateur Sleuth
Murder Mystery
Red Herring
Dark & Stormy Night
Mysterious Death
Death & Grief
Private Investigator
Secrecy
Crime
Mystery
About this ebook
Lorna Kepler was beautiful and willful, a loner who couldn't resist flirting with danger. Maybe that's what killed her.
Her death had raised a host of tough questions. The cops suspected homicide, but they could find neither motive nor suspect. Even the means were mysterious: Lorna's body was so badly decomposed when it was discovered that they couldn't be certain she hadn't died of natural causes. In the way of overworked cops everywhere, the case was gradually shifted to the back burner and became another unsolved file.
Only Lorna's mother kept it alive, consumed by the certainty that somebody out there had gotten away with murder.
In the ten months since her daughter's death, Janice Kepler had joined a support group, trying to come to terms with her loss and her anger. It wasn't helping. And so, leaving a session one evening and noticing a light on in the offices of Millhone Investigations, she knocked on the door.
In answering that knock, Kinsey Millhone is pulled into the netherworld of unavenged murder, where only a pact with the devil will satisfy the restless ghosts of the victims and give release to the living they have left behind.
Eleven books into the series that has won her readers around the world, Sue Grafton takes a darkside turn, pitching us into a shadow land of pain and grief where killers still walk free, unaccused, unpunished, unrepentant. With "K" is for Killer she offers a tale that is dark, complex, and deeply disturbing.
"A" Is for Alibi
"B" Is for Burglar
"C" Is for Corpse
"D" Is for Deadbeat
"E" Is for Evidence
"F" Is for Fugitive
"G" Is for Gumshoe
"H" Is for Homicide
"I" Is for Innocent
"J" Is for Judgment
"K" Is for Killer
"L" is for Lawless
"M" Is for Malice
"N" Is for Noose
"O" Is for Outlaw
"P" Is for Peril
"Q" Is for Quarry
"R" Is for Ricochet
"S" Is for Silence
"T" Is for Trespass
"U" Is for Undertow
"V" Is for Vengeance
"W" Is for Wasted
"X"
Sue Grafton
Sue Grafton was one of the most popular female writers, both in the UK and in the US. Born in Kentucky in 1940, she began her career as a TV scriptwriter before Kinsey Millhone and the 'alphabet' series took off. Two of the novels B is for Burglar and C is for Corpse won the first Anthony Awards for Best Novel. Sue lived and wrote in Montecito, California and Louisville, Kentucky.
Read more from Sue Grafton
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Related to "K" is for Killer
Titles in the series (16)
"A" is for Alibi: A Kinsey Millhone Mystery Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5"C" Is for Corpse: A Kinsey Millhone Mystery Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5"F" is for Fugitive: A Kinsey Millhone Mystery Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5"D" is for Deadbeat: A Kinsey Millhone Mystery Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5"E" is for Evidence: A Kinsey Millhone Mystery Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5"B" is for Burglar: A Kinsey Millhone Mystery Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5"G" is for Gumshoe: A Kinsey Millhone Mystery Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5"J" is for Judgment: A Kinsey Millhone Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5"I" is for Innocent: A Kinsey Millhone Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5"K" is for Killer: A Kinsey Millhone Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5"H" is for Homicide: A Kinsey Millhone Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5"N" is for Noose: A Kinsey Millhone Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Sue Grafton Collection: The Kinsey Millhone Novels (Books A-O) Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings"L" is for Lawless: A Kinsey Millhone Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5"M" is for Malice: A Kinsey Millhone Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5"O" is for Outlaw Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5
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Reviews for "K" is for Killer
28 ratings19 reviews
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5First, read Mar. 12/17 to April 5/17. Reading again starting Dec 22/18. As always, a great read. Never a dull moment. Her books could be read in one seating if one had the time. I never tire of Kinsey Millhone, the main character in Sue Grafton's books. She is an independent young woman, self-employed, doing what she loves to do and is good at it. As a private investigator, she is a minority in her field. If you enjoy suspense, this is book and series for you
- Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5I still think she spends too much time describing settings.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Another home run for Sue Grafton. I loved this book but I almost hate to gush over it because that feels like it would go against the atmosphere of the book.
Kinsey has been asked to by a mother to investigate the death of her daughter on which the police have not been able to make much headway. From there Kinsey gets sucked into the life of the night people in Santa Teresa. She meets hookers, night djs, nurses that work the night shift and waitresses that work at night. Her own life gets turned upside down as she starts working nights and sleeping days. It really has a brooding atmospheric feeling like an old film noir.
The story has a lot of suspicious characters and lines of investigation to follow, a lot of leg work on Kinsey's part. The atmosphere almost clings around this book like night fog. In the end, you can decide whether justice was done or not. This is a story that will stay with you. - Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Kinsey in a funk; there's a widening of the character here that I found really interesting. Although "just another" in the alphabet series, this one stands out. The short scene at the end in the water plant was scary. There must be something primeval about the idea of black rushing water that makes me shudder.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5This one has Kinsey looking into the death of a young woman who was not as nice and clean as her parents wanted to believe. The young woman in question was a high priced call girl who was murder 10 months ago. Has a variety of extra characters and yet again I didn't figure out who the killer was in advance.
- Rating: 2 out of 5 stars2/5I thought this one started nicely. The plot seemed sturdy. I liked the mix of characters. But it just seemed to come apart at the end. No resolution of many story lines. I always enjoy these books, but this one disappointed.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Thankfully, I have never suffered with insomnia. I am a bit of the reverse in that I have troubles staying awake past 10:00 pm and my perfect sleep potion seems to be reading while lying in bed. In this Alphabet series book, I got to experience insomnia through Kinsey. I found this mystery to be one the better one's so far n the series. The little details had me trying to pin the possible murder on four different characters at different points in the story. The prostitution/call girl/porno movie angle and the night investigations gives the story a grittier edge to it. While we don't see much if anything of the now regular cast of the "Alphabet series - Kinsey's landlord Henry Pitts, his brother William, her somewhat friend restaurant owner Rosie, etc - it was nice to have a new character in the form of Officer Cheney Phillips arrive on the scene. As with previous stories in the series, I continue to enjoy the nostalgic trip back in time to a pre-cell/smart phone world where one looks for a payphone or asks to use someone's phone when one need to place a call.
- Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5I think this was one of my least favorite books in the series. It felt like Millhone's token "sarcasm" was more like plain bitchiness. I liked the idea of the mystery in and of itself but I think the main character just wore on me way too much in this particular instance and the ending seemed overly flubbed and completely lacking any connection or intensity.
- Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Solid but low-key entry in the Alphabet series. This is a cold case, so much of the story is gradually uncovering details about the victim. What makes this somewhat different is how Kinsey is affected Her running and eating habits don't change, but her hours do, as she almost very quickly shifts into working from evening to the wee hours and sleeping during the day. It doesn't really affect her investigation -- most of the people she needs to speak to are also night dwellers.But it provides an appropriate subtext for the final resolution. Oblique spoiler 1: What happens at the end is reminiscent of a pivotal moment in the television series The Closer. Oblique spoiler 2: One character when introduced immediately and correctly reminded me of "Dead Meat" in the spoof Hot Shots.
Recommended for fans. New readers should start with a few earlier entries to get a feel for "normal" Kinsey Milhone first. - Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5
Another good episode in the Kinsey Millhone series. The storyline was interesting and didn't have a lot of distractions taking away from it. I enjoyed following the cold case clues along with Kinsey and Grafton did a great job of sticking to the point. The ending was not what I expected, but gave a great view into Kinsey's developing character and I really liked it. My only complaint was that the motive behind the murder was not crystal clear and if you blinked you missed it. (Not good when your listening to the audioversion). Still, everything did make sense in the end!
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Kind of a disappointing, cliff hanging ending. Not typical of this series so far.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5***This is a project of e-reading Grafton's series -- I started reading these back in the 1980s and would read each release as they came out over the years. To prevent spoilers, I will not attempt to summarize in detail. ***
Another good one by Grafton. I felt there were a couple loose ends left untied though (that would not be resolved in later books). - Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5BOTTOM-LINE:
The worst of the series so far.
.
PLOT OR PREMISE:
A mother attending a support group for grief-stricken parents in Kinsey's building hires her to look into the death of her daughter who died at home with no known cause of death.
.
WHAT I LIKED:
Cheney is involved as the original investigating officer, and it's fun to see a bit of a dance between them. There's lots of different characters running around, and lots of possible plots. It's definitely not a quick case for her.
.
WHAT I DIDN'T LIKE:
There is a giant plot hole in the case, namely a messed up timeline for a recording device, as well as a ton of interesting elements that go NOWHERE. Their purpose in the story is so obvious, they fall into the story very bluntly.
.
DISCLOSURE:
I received no compensation, not even a free copy, in exchange for this review. I am not personal friends with the author, nor do I follow her on social media. - Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I found this a sad read. A cold case which let us into the minds of parents, friends, siblings of the murdered girl but left us still not knowing who she really was. Like life really. Do we ever know, really know the people closest to us?
Kinsey soon finds that investigating this ten month old mystery is dangerous. The police suspected murder but could prove nothing. Kinsey is sure Lorna was killed and by a vicious man who kills again and looks to escape justice. Not if Kinsey can help it!
Another well written Kinsey tale to add to the series. - Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Only the second in the series I've read; surprisingly good for what appears to be a formulaic series of books with no particular story arc. You would think if you knew exactly how many books you were going to put in a series, you could at least make an effort at some sort of overall character development and story, but I didn't see much difference between the "A" book and the "K" book.
The resolution doesn't quite hang together, to my mind; the final fate of the criminal seems unlikely and the thriller-style ending is forced, although some effort is made to set it up earlier in the book.
Still, a good read with some exciting moments and an interesting if somewhat ambiguous puzzle. - Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Murder. Kinsey is asked to look into the 9 month old murder of a girl, to give her mother some closure. Nobody remembers much, but as Kinsey investigates deeper into the nightlife of Santa Terisa, a few secrets emerge. Finally Kinsey is faced with a profound choice - when the legal system fails, where do you go for "justice"?
Stunning. A gripping read, convoluted plot with a few really heartfelt moments. The final twist is great. - Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5A mother wants Kinsey to investigate the death of her adult daughter, which happened nine months earlier. The farther Kinsey delves into the investigation the darker the details become. She finds out the murdered girl has a sordid past and as always, things are not as simple as they seem.
Kinsey is in a bit of a funk in this book. She is sleeping during the day, working all night. Henry, her landlord and friend, is out of town and Kinsey can’t seem to shake her blues.
BOTTOM LINE: A good addition to the series, this book reminds us that even PIs have bad weeks. There are a few great new characters, including a hilarious cross-dresser and a financially savvy hooker. - Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Sue Grafton has been writting the Kinsey Milhone series for about 25 years now and she has been fairly consistant with her quality. Her writing is simple and easy to read. The Mysteries are not terribly difficult to forsee, but she writes a good story and not a lot of thinking is involved.
K is for Killer is about a murdered girl who seemed to be a loner who kept her nose clean and didn't cause trouble. Well she didn't cause trouble but trouble found her anyway. She also led a double life and it was wondered if it was the cause. The girls mother hires Kinsey to find out what really happened. - Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Kinsey is asked by a grieving mother, Janice Kepler, to investigate the death of her daughter, Laura. Slowly Kinsey puts the pieces together discovering that the beautiful young woman was a high end call girl, acted in a pornographic film and was going to marry a gangster. Kinsey becomes friends with another teenage hooker, with an all night DJ, battles Laura' sloppy landlord and his paranoid wife and wonders about a powerful businessman. Which if any is the killer?
This is a fascinating read and is tough to put down.
Book preview
"K" is for Killer - Sue Grafton
1
The statutory definition of homicide is the unlawful killing of one human being by another.
Sometimes the phrase with malice
is employed, the concept serving to distinguish murder from the numerous other occasions in which people deprive each other of life—wars and executions coming foremost to mind. Malice
in the law doesn’t necessarily convey hatred or even ill will but refers instead to a conscious desire to inflict serious injury or cause death. In the main, criminal homicide is an intimate, personal affair insofar as most homicide victims are killed by close relatives, friends, or acquaintances. Reason enough to keep your distance, if you’re asking me.
In Santa Teresa, California, approximately eighty-five percent of all criminal homicides are resolved, meaning that the assailant is identified, apprehended, and the question of guilt or innocence is adjudicated by the courts. The victims of unsolved homicides I think of as the unruly dead: persons who reside in a limbo of their own, some state between life and death, restless, dissatisfied, longing for release. It’s a fanciful notion for someone not generally given to flights of imagination, but I think of these souls locked in an uneasy relationship with those who have killed them. I’ve talked to homicide investigators who’ve been caught up in similar reveries, haunted by certain victims who seem to linger among us, persistent in their desire for vindication. In the hazy zone where wakefulness fades into sleep, in that leaden moment just before the mind sinks below consciousness, I can sometimes hear them murmuring. They mourn themselves. They sing a lullaby of the murdered. They whisper the names of their attackers, those men and women who still walk the earth, unidentified, unaccused, unpunished, unrepentant. On such nights, I do not sleep well. I lie awake listening, hoping to catch a syllable, a phrase, straining to discern in that roll call of conspirators the name of one killer. Lorna Kepler’s murder ended up affecting me that way, though I didn’t learn the facts of her death until months afterward.
It was mid-February, a Sunday, and I was working late, little Miss Virtue organizing itemized expenses and assorted business receipts for my tax return. I’d decided it was time to handle matters like a grown-up instead of shoving everything in a shoebox and delivering it to my accountant at the very last minute. Talk about cranky! Each year the man positively bellows at me, and I have to swear I’ll reform, a vow I take seriously until tax time rolls around again and I realize my finances are in complete disarray.
I was sitting at my desk in the law firm where I rent office space. The night outside was chilly by the usual California definition, which is to say fifty degrees. I was the only one on the premises, ensconced in a halo of warm, sleep-inducing light while the other offices remained dark and quiet. I’d just put on a pot of coffee to counteract the narcolepsy that afflicts me at the approach to money matters. I laid my head on the desk, listening to the soothing gargle of the water as it filtered through the coffee maker. Even the smell of mocha java was not sufficient to stimulate my torpid senses. Five more minutes and I’d be out like a light, drooling on my blotter with my right cheek picking up inky messages in reverse.
I heard a tap at the side entrance and I lifted my head, tilting an ear in that direction like a dog on alert. It was nearly ten o’clock, and I wasn’t expecting any visitors. I roused myself, left my desk, and moved out into the hallway. I cocked my head against the side door leading out into the hall. The tap was repeated, much louder. I said, Yes?
I heard a woman’s muffled voice in response. Is this Millhone Investigations?
We’re closed.
What?
Hang on.
I put the chain on the door and opened it a crack, peering out at her.
She was on the far side of forty, her outfit of the urban cowgirl sort: boots, faded jeans, and a buckskin shirt. She wore enough heavy silver-and-turquoise jewelry to look like she would clank. She had dark hair nearly to her waist, worn loose, faintly frizzy and dyed the color of oxblood shoes. Sorry to bother you, but the directory downstairs says there’s a private investigator up here in this suite. Is he in, by any chance?
Ah. Well, more or less,
I said, but these aren’t actual office hours. Is there any way you can come back tomorrow? I’ll be happy to set up an appointment for you once I check my book.
Are you his secretary?
Her tanned face was an irregular oval, lines cutting down along each side of her nose, four lines between her eyes where the brows were plucked to nothing and reframed in black. She’d used the same sharpened pencil to line her eyelids, too, though she wore no other makeup that I could see.
I tried not to sound irritated since the mistake is not uncommon. I’m him,
I said. Millhone Investigations. The first name is Kinsey. Did you tell me yours?
No, I didn’t, and I’m sorry. I’m Janice Kepler. You must think I’m a complete idiot.
Well, not complete, I thought.
She reached out to shake hands and then realized the crack in the doorway wasn’t large enough to permit contact. She pulled her hand back. It never occurred to me you’d be a woman. I’ve been seeing the Millhone Investigations on the board down in the stairwell. I come here for a support group once a week down a floor. I’ve been thinking I’d call, but I guess I never worked up my nerve. Then tonight as I was leaving, I saw the light on from the parking lot. I hope you don’t mind. I’m actually on my way to work, so I don’t have that long.
What sort of work?
I asked, stalling.
"Shift manager at Frankie’s Coffee Shop on upper State Street. Eleven to seven, which makes it hard to take care of any daytime appointments. I usually go to bed at eight in the morning and don’t get up again until late afternoon. Even if I could just tell you my problem, it’d be a big relief. Then if it turns out it’s not the sort of work you do, maybe you could recommend someone else. I could really use some help, but I don’t know where to turn. Your being a woman might make it easier." The penciled eyebrows went up in an imploring double arch.
I hesitated. Support group, I thought. Drink? Drugs? Codependency If the woman was looney-tunes, I’d really like to know. Behind her, the hall was empty, looking flat and faintly yellow in the overhead light. Lonnie Kingman’s law firm takes up the entire third floor except for the two public restrooms: one marked M and one W. It was always possible she had a couple of M confederates lurking in the commode, ready at a signal to jump out and attack me. For what purpose, I couldn’t think. Any money I had, I was being forced to give to the feds at pen point. Just a minute,
I said.
I closed the door and slid the chain off its track, opening the door again so I could admit her. She moved past me hesitantly, a crackling brown paper bag in her arms. Her perfume was musky, the scent reminiscent of saddle soap and sawdust. She seemed ill at ease, her manner infected by some edgy combination of apprehension and embarrassment. The brown paper bag seemed to contain papers of some sort. This was in my car. I didn’t want you to think I carried it around with me ordinarily.
I’m in here,
I said. I moved into my office with the woman close on my heels. I indicated a chair for her and watched as she sat down, placing the paper bag on the floor. I pulled up a chair for myself. I figured if we sat on opposite sides of my desk she’d check out my deductible expenses, which were none of her business. I’m the current ranking expert at reading upside down and seldom hesitate to insert myself into matters that are not my concern. What support group?
I asked.
It’s for parents of murdered children. My daughter died here last April. Lorna Kepler. She was found in her cottage over by the mission.
I said, Ah, yes. I remember, though I thought there was some speculation about the cause of death.
Not in my mind,
she said tartly. "I don’t know how she died, but I know she was murdered just as sure as I’m sitting here. She reached up and tucked a long ribbon of loose hair behind her right ear.
The police never did come up with a suspect, and I don’t know what kind of luck they’re going to have after all this time. Somebody told me for every day that passes, the chances diminish, but I forget the percentage."
Unfortunately, that’s true.
She leaned over and rooted in the paper bag, pulling out a photograph in a bifold frame. This is Lorna. You probably saw this in the papers at the time.
She held out the picture and I took it, staring down at the girl. Not a face I’d forget. She was in her early twenties with dark hair pulled smoothly away from her face, a long swatch of hair hanging down the middle of her back. She had clear hazel eyes with a nearly Oriental tilt; dark, cleanly arched brows; a wide mouth; straight nose. She was wearing a white blouse with a long snowy white scarf wrapped several times around her neck, a dark navy blazer, and faded blue jeans on a slender frame. She stared directly at the camera, smiling slightly, her hands tucked down in her front pockets. She was leaning against a floral-print wall, the paper showing lavish pale pink climbing roses against a white background. I returned the picture, wondering what in the world to say under the circumstances.
She’s very beautiful,
I murmured. When was that taken?
About a year ago. I had to bug her to get this. She’s my youngest. Just turned twenty-five. She was hoping to be a model, but it didn’t work out.
You must have been young when you had her.
Twenty-one,
she said. I was seventeen with Berlyn. I got married because of her. Five months gone and I was big as a house. I’m still with her daddy, which surprised everyone, including me, I guess. I was nineteen with my middle daughter. Her name’s Trinny. She’s real sweet. Lorna’s the one I nearly died with, poor thing. Got up one morning, day before I was due, and started hemorrhaging. I didn’t know what was happening. Blood everywhere. It was just like a river pouring out between my legs. I’ve never seen anything like it. Doctor didn’t think he could save either one of us, but we pulled through. You have children, Ms. Millhone?
Make it Kinsey,
I said. I’m not married.
She smiled slightly. Just between us, Lorna really was my favorite, probably because she was such a problem all her life. I wouldn’t say that to either of the older girls, of course.
She tucked the picture away. Anyway, I know what it’s like to have your heart ripped out. I probably look like an ordinary woman, but I’m a zombie, the living dead, maybe a little bit cracked. We’ve been going to this support group…somebody suggested it, and I thought it might help. I was ready to try anything to get away from the pain. Mace—that’s my husband—went a few times and then quit. He couldn’t stand the stories, couldn’t stand all the suffering compressed in one room. He wants to shut it out, get shed of it, get clean. I don’t think it’s possible, but there’s no arguing the point. To each his own, as they say.
I can’t even imagine what it must be like,
I said.
"And I can’t describe it, either. That’s the hell of it. We’re not like regular people anymore. You have a child murdered, and from that moment on you’re from some other planet. You don’t speak the same language as other folks. Even in this support group, we seem to speak different dialects. Everybody hangs on to their pain like it was some special license to suffer. You can’t help it. We all think ours is the worst case we ever heard. Lorna’s murder hasn’t been solved, so naturally we think our anguish is more acute because of it. Some other family, maybe their child’s killer got caught and he served a few years. Now he’s out on the street again, and that’s what they have to live with—knowing some fella’s walking around smoking cigarettes, drinking beers, having himself a good old time every Saturday night while their child is dead. Or the killer’s still in prison and’ll be there for life, but he’s warm, he’s safe. He gets three meals a day and the clothes on his back. He might be on death row, but he won’t actually die. Hardly anybody does unless they beg to be executed. Why should they? All those soft-hearted lawyers go to work. System’s set up to keep ’em all alive while our kids are dead for the rest of the time."
Painful,
I said.
"Yes, it is. I can’t even tell you how much that hurts. I sit downstairs in that room and I listen to all the stories, and I don’t know what to do. It’s not like it makes my pain any less, but at least it makes it part of something. Without the support group, Lorna’s death just evaporates. It’s like nobody cares. It’s not even something people talk about anymore. We’re all of us wounded, so I don’t feel so cut off. I’m not separate from them. Our emotional injuries just come in different forms. Her tone throughout was nearly matter-of-fact, and the dark-eyed look she gave me then seemed all the more painful because of it.
I’m telling you all this because I don’t want you to think I’m crazy…at least any more than I actually am. You have a child murdered and you go berserk. Sometimes you recover and sometimes you don’t. What I’m saying is, I know I’m obsessed. I think about Lorna’s killer way more than I should. Whoever did this, I want him punished. I want this laid to rest. I want to know why he did it. I want to tell him face-to-face exactly what he did to my life the day he took hers. The psychologist who runs the group, she says I need to find a way to get my power back. She says it’s better to get mad than go on feeling heartsick and defenseless. So. That’s why I’m here. I guess that’s the long and short of it."
Taking action,
I said.
You bet. Not just talking. I’m sick and tired of talk. It gets nowhere.
You’re going to have to do a bit more talking if you want my help. You want some coffee?
I know that. I’d love some. Black is fine.
I filled two mugs and added milk to mine, saving my questions until I was seated again. I reached for the legal pad on my desk, and I picked up a pen. I hate to make you go through the whole thing again, but I really need to have the details, at least as much as you know.
I understand. Maybe that’s why it took me so long to come up here. I’ve told this story probably six hundred times, but it never gets any easier.
She blew on the surface of her coffee and then took a sip. "That’s good coffee. Strong. I hate drinking coffee too weak. It’s no taste. Anyway, let me think how to say this. I guess what you have to understand about Lorna is she was an independent little cuss. She did everything her way. She didn’t care what other people thought, and she didn’t feel what she did was anybody else’s business. She’d been asthmatic as a child and ended up missing quite a bit of school, so she never did well in her classes. She was smart as a whip, but she was out half the time. Poor thing was allergic to just about everything. She didn’t have many friends. She couldn’t spend the night at anybody else’s house because other little girls always seemed to live with pets or house dust, mold, or whatnot. She outgrew a lot of that as she matured, but she was always on medication for one thing or another. I make a point of this because I think it had a profound effect on the way she turned out. She was antisocial: bullheaded and uncooperative. She had a streak of defiance, I think because she was used to being by herself, doing what she wanted. And I might have spoiled her some. Children sense when they have the power to cause you distress. Makes them tyrants to some extent. Lorna didn’t understand about pleasing other people, ordinary give-and-take. She was a nice person and she could be generous if she wanted, but she wasn’t what you’d call loving or nurturing. She paused.
I don’t know how I got off on that. I meant to talk about something else, if I can think what it was."
She frowned, blinking, and I could see her consult some interior agenda. There was a moment or two of silence while I drank my coffee and she drank hers. Finally her memory clicked in and she brightened, saying, Oh, yes. Sorry about that.
She shifted on her chair and took up the narrative. Asthma medication sometimes caused her insomnia. Everybody thinks antihistamines make you drowsy, which they can, of course, but it isn’t the deep sleep you need for ordinary rest. She didn’t like to sleep. Even grown, she got by on as little as three hours sometimes. I think she was afraid of lying down. Being prone always seemed to aggravate her wheezing. She got in the habit of roaming around at night when everybody else was asleep.
Who’d she hang out with? Did she have friends or just ramble on her own?
Other night owls, I’d guess. An FM disc jockey for one, the guy on that all-night jazz station. I can’t remember his name, but you might know if I said it. And there was a nurse on the night shift at St. Terry’s. Serena Bonney. Lorna actually worked for Serena’s husband at the water treatment plant.
I made a note to myself. I’d have to check on both if I decided to help. What sort of job?
It was just part-time…one to five for the city, doing clerical work. You know, typing and filing, answering the telephone. She’d be up half the night, and then she could sleep late if she wanted.
Twenty hours a week isn’t much,
I said. How could she afford to live?
Well, she had her own little place. This cabin at the back of somebody’s property. It wasn’t anything fancy, and the rent on that was cheap. Couple of rooms, with a bath. It might have been some kind of gardener’s cottage to begin with. No insulation. She had no central heating and not a lot of kitchen to speak of, just a microwave oven and a two-burner hot plate, refrigerator the size of a little cardboard box. You know the kind. She had electricity, running water, and a telephone, and that was about the extent of it. She could have fixed it up real cute, but she didn’t want to bother. She liked it simple, she said, and besides, it wasn’t all that permanent. Rent was nominal, and that’s all she seemed to care about. She liked her privacy, and people learned to leave her pretty much alone.
Hardly sounds like an allergen-free environment,
I remarked.
Well, I know, and I said as much myself. Of course by then she was doing better. The allergies and asthma were more seasonal than chronic. She might have an occasional attack after exercise or if she had a cold or she was under stress. The point is she didn’t want to live around other people. She liked the feel of being in the woods. The property wasn’t all that big…six or seven acres with a little two-lane gravel road coming in along the back. I guess it gave her the sense of isolation and quiet. She didn’t want to live in some apartment building with tenants on all sides, bumping and thumping and playing loud music. She wasn’t friendly. She didn’t even like to say ‘hi’ in passing. That’s just how she was. She moved into the cabin, and that’s where she stayed.
You said she was found at the cabin. Do the police think she died there as well?
I believe so. Like I said, she wasn’t found for some time. Nearly two weeks, they think, from the state she was in. I hadn’t heard from her, but I didn’t think much about it. I’d talked to her on a Thursday night and she told me she was taking off. I assumed she meant that night, but she didn’t say as much, at least not that I remember. If you recall, spring came late last year and the pollen count was high, which meant her allergies were acting up. Anyway, she called and said she’d be out of town for two weeks. She was taking time off from work and said she was driving up to the mountains to see whatever snows were left. Ski country was the only place she found relief when she was suffering. She said she’d call when she got back, and that was the last I talked to her.
I’d begun to scribble notes. What date was this?
April nineteenth. The body was discovered May fifth.
Where was she going? Did she give you her destination?
She mentioned the mountains, but she never did say where. You think that makes a difference?
I’m just curious,
I replied. April seems late for snow. It could have been a cover story if she was going somewhere else. Did you get the impression she was concealing something?
Oh, Lorna’s not the kind who confided details. My other two, if they’re going off on vacation, we all sit around poring over the travel brochures and hotel accommodations. Like right now, Berlyn’s saved her money for a trip, and we’re always talking about this cruise versus that, oohing and ahhing. The fantasy’s half the fun is the way I look at it. Lorna said that just set up a lot of expectations and then reality would disappoint. She didn’t look at anything the way other people did. At any rate, when I didn’t hear from her, I figured she was out of town. She wasn’t one to call much anyway, and none of us would have any reason to go to her place if she was gone.
She hesitated, embarrassed. I can tell I feel guilty. Just listen to how much explanation I’m going into here. I just don’t want it to seem like I didn’t care.
It doesn’t sound like that.
That’s good, because I loved that child more than life itself.
Tears rose briefly, almost like a reflex, and I could see her blink them away. Anyway, it was someone she’d done some work for, who finally went back there.
What was her name?
Oh. Serena Bonney.
I glanced at my notes. She’s the nurse?
That’s right.
What kind of work had Lorna done for her?
She house-sat. Lorna looked after Mrs. Bonney’s dad sometimes. As I understand it, the old fella wasn’t well, and Mrs. Bonney didn’t like leaving him by himself. I guess she was trying to make arrangements to leave town and wanted to talk to Lorna before she made reservations. Lorna didn’t have an answering machine. Mrs. Bonney called several times and then decided to leave a note on her front door. Once she got close, she realized something was wrong.
Janice broke off, not with emotion, but with the unpleasant images that must have been conjured up. After two weeks undiscovered, the body would have been in very poor shape.
How did Lorna die? Was there a determination as to cause of death?
Well, that’s the point. They never did find out. She was lying facedown on the floor in her underwear, with her sweat clothes strewn nearby. I guess she’d come back from a run and stripped down for her shower, but it didn’t seem like she’d been assaulted. It’s always possible she suffered an asthma attack.
But you don’t believe it.
No, I don’t, and the police didn’t, either.
She was into exercise? I find that surprising from what you’ve told me so far.
Oh, she liked to keep in shape. I do know there were times when a workout made her wheezy and kind of short of breath, but she had one of those inhalers and it seemed to help. If she had a bad spell, she’d cut back on exercise and then take it up again when she was feeling better. Doctors didn’t want her to act like an invalid.
What about the autopsy?
Report’s right in here,
she said, indicating the paper bag.
There were no signs of violence?
Janice shook her head. I don’t know how to say this. I guess because of putrefaction they weren’t even sure it was her at first. It wasn’t until they compared her dental records that she was identified.
I’m assuming the case was handled as a homicide.
Well, yes. Even with cause of death undetermined, it was considered suspicious. They investigated as a homicide, but then nothing turned up. Now it seems like they dropped it. You know how they do those things. Something else comes along, and they concentrate on that.
Sometimes there isn’t sufficient information to make a finding in a situation like that. It doesn’t mean they haven’t worked hard.
Well, I understand, but I still can’t accept it.
I noticed that she had ceased to make eye contact, and I could feel the whisper of intuition crawling up along my spine. I found myself focusing on her face, wondering at her apparent uneasiness. Janice, is there something you haven’t told me?
Her cheeks began to tint as if she were being overtaken by a hot flash. I was just getting to that.
2
She reached into the brown paper bag again and pulled out a videotape in an unmarked box that she placed on the edge of the desk. About a month ago, someone sent us this tape,
she said. "I still don’t know who, and I can’t think why they’d do it except to cause us distress. Mace wasn’t home. I found it in the mailbox in a plain brown wrapper with no return address. I opened the package because it had both our names on it. I went ahead and stuck it in the VCR. I don’t know what I thought it was. A tape of some television show or somebody’s wedding. I about died when I saw. Tape was pure smut, and there was Lorna, big as life. I just let out this shriek. I turned it off and threw it in the trash as fast as I could. It was like I’d been burned. I felt like I should go wash my hands in the sink. But then I had second thoughts. Because this tape could be evidence. It might tie in to the reason she was