Anatomic euphemism

Because most Transformers fiction is aimed at kids, and most Transformers don't have organic squishy bits, the fiction has introduced a lot of anatomic euphemisms for assorted bits of human anatomy, especially the one you sit on. Most are real mechanical or electronic terms, and also presumably real parts of Transformer anatomy. A few are also the names of Transformers. This is probably akin to being named Dick Trickle or Alfred Butts.

Actuator

"Blow it out your actuator, three-face."

—Blackarachnia, "Transform and Roll Out", Animated cartoon

"Collaborate, my actuator!"

—Swindle, "Decepticon Air", Animated cartoon

"You're tickling my actuators!"

—Fixit, "Brainpower", Robots in Disguise cartoon

Afterburner

"Now, let's kick afterburners!"

—Slingshot, "Aerial Assault", The Transformers cartoon

"Say uncle, or I'll shove your nose in your afterburner!"

—Sideswipe, "City of Steel", The Transformers cartoon

"Kiss your afterburners goodbye, Decepticon slime!!"

—Spike Witwicky, "The Rebirth, Part 3", The Transformers cartoon

"If I take out Optimus Prime, even Starscream's gonna have to kiss my afterburners."

—Thundercracker, unknown episode, Cybertron cartoon

See also any of the characters named Afterburner.

Asynchronous transfer adapter

"Aww! My asynchronous transfer adapter is killing me."

—Strongarm as he rubbed his back, "Destructive Power", Energon cartoon

Bearing

"This guy's got bearings of chrome steel."

—Rhinox, "Beast Wars (Part 1)", Beast Wars cartoon

"I can't believe that dino-dummy has got the bearings to show his backstabbing mug around here."

—Ironhide, "New World Order", Generation 1 comic

"What if there was one badge for all of us? And instead of fighting each other, we attack those that put us here... and we take what is ours! Would you have the bearings for that?"

—Megatron, Megatron Origin #3

"Starscream's the kind that would kill you in your sleep. At least Megatron has the ball bearings to do it to your face."

—Barricade, Transformers The Game

"Pretty big bearings. For a human..."

—Bulkhead on Agent Fowler, "Darkness Rising, Part 2", Prime cartoon

Boron compressor

"We were brilliant in battle, Megatron. The Dinobots overwhelmed us with sheer brute force!"
"Brilliant, my boron compressor!"

—Starscream and Megatron, "War of the Dinobots", The Transformers cartoon

Bumper

"My bumper! Look at what you did to my poor bumper!"

—Unseen transformer, "Moving Violations", Transformers Timelines

See also Bumper.

Can

"You know where to find Decepticon mines?"
"You didn't think I've just been sitting on my can since I've been on this rock?"

—Miko and Wheeljack, "Hurt", Prime cartoon

Clutch

"Look out the clutch-munching window!"

—Rook, "Derailment", "Beast Wars: Uprising"

Command module

"Stick it in your command module, eight-eyes."

—Rattrap, "Power Surge", Beast Wars cartoon

Crankcase

"Sorry about yankin' your crankcase."

—Bulkhead, "Total Meltdown", Animated cartoon

See also Crankcase.

Diode

"Aw, go ding your diodes and get defunct, Megatron. I'm not helping you do zilch."

—Gears, "Changing Gears", The Transformers cartoon

"Me Grimlock here again, Optimus Prime, to pull your diodes out of laser fire."

—Grimlock, "Atlantis, Arise!", The Transformers cartoon

"Chumley, you're one royal pain in the diode."

—Optimus Prime, "Prime Target", The Transformers cartoon

"I'll rip you to pieces with my bare claws, tear out your circuits with my teeth, and spit your diodes back at you!"

—Scorponok (hopefully using a different definition of "diodes") to Unicron, "On the Edge of Extinction!", Marvel The Transformers comic

"Those bureaucratobots couldn't find their own diodes with a bitmap and a homing beacon."

—Sentinel Prime talks behind the council's back, "Decepticon Air", Animated cartoon.

"Have you blown a diode?! I'm trying to work here!!"

—Shockwave, "Endgame, Part I", Animated cartoon.

Engine block

"Woah, somebody's got a huge chip on his engine block"

—Bulkhead to Dirt Boss, "Three's a Crowd", Animated cartoon

Exhaust port

"Tell Megatron to blow it out his exhaust port. We're having a demolition derby."

—Drag Strip mouthing off, "Starscream's Brigade", The Transformers cartoon

"Nothing, my exhaust port."

—Jetstorm, "Mercenary Pursuits", Beast Machines cartoon

"Have you got your processor up your exhaust port?"

—Ratchet, "Nanosec", Animated cartoon

"You overgrown Autobot! I will scramble your circuits so bad you'll need a GPS scanner to find your own exhaust port—"

—Hothead Blitzwing to Omega Supreme, "A Bridge Too Close, Part II", Animated cartoon

"Suck. My. Exhaust. Pipe."

—Hot Rod to Overlord, "At the Last Second", Titans Return cartoon

Fan belt

"Optimus! Elita-1! Get your fan belts in gear!"

—Sentinel Prime, "Along Came a Spider", Animated cartoon

Fuel pump

"Scrounge wasn't much of a warrior, but he had a fuel pump as big as a planet."

—Blaster, "Crater Critters", Marvel The Transformers comic

Gearbox

"What's with you two? [Gestures toward pants area.] Is my gearbox hangin' out or somethin'?"

—Rattrap, "Aftermath", Beast Wars cartoon

Hard drive

"So, Sentinel Prime, take your order, and your condescending attitude, and stick 'em in your hard drive! You're on my turf now!"

—Optimus Prime, "The Elite Guard", Animated cartoon

Joystick

"They're on my tail!"
"Oh, pussycat, you really know how to tickle my joystick."

—Cheetor and Rattrap, "Coming of the Fuzors (Part 1)", Beast Wars cartoon

Lubricant

Main article: Lubricant

"Leaking lubricants!"

—Ironhide, "More than Meets the Eye, Part 1", The Transformers cartoon

"He's leaked lubricants all over my foot!"

—Ironhide, Transformers film

"Bumblebee! Stop lubricating the man!"

—Optimus Prime, Transformers film

Lugnuts

"The other equipment has been salvaged, but you took the alien Transmetal driver. Where is it?"
"Gone. Ain't that a kick in the lugnuts?"

—Megatron and Depth Charge, "Feral Scream Part 2", Beast Wars cartoon

See also Lugnut.

Magna fuses

"Kiss your magna fuses goodbye, Autobots!"

—Megatron, "Fire on the Mountain", The Transformers cartoon

Manifold

"I've got the plan, if all of you've got the cast-iron manifolds for it."

—Prowl, "The Ultimate Doom, Part 1", The Transformers cartoon

"I don't like the idea of Megatron getting the antimatter formula. He can't be trusted!"
"Sure can't, manifold-mouth!"

—Starscream and Bluestreak, "Roll for It", The Transformers cartoon

"We should have been allies, you know. Imagine what we could have accomplished. But you never had the manifolds to do what needed to be done."
"I have the manifolds to stand up for those who cannot stand for themselves."

—Megatron and Optimus Prime, Transformers: Devastation

Motherboard

"Let's go kick their motherboards."

—Sari Sumdac, "Lost and Found", Animated cartoon

"Scruples? You'd sell your own motherboard to the highest bidder."

—Megatron sums up Swindle, "SUV: Society of Ultimate Villainy", Animated cartoon

"You, sound-off. Why do you want to be here?"
"To be an Elite Guard warrior and kick Decepticon skidplate, sir!"
"You couldn't kick my motherboard if I held it in front of your foot."

—Sentinel Minor, "Autoboot Camp", Animated cartoon

"You're a few microchips short of a motherboard."

—Rook, "Derailment", Beast Wars: Uprising

Nodes

"Way to go, numb nodes!"

—Wasp, "Autoboot Camp", Animated cartoon

"Put me down you numb nodes!"

—Sentinel Prime, "Predacons Rising", Animated cartoon

Piston

"Give me that or I'll pulverize your pistons!"

—Lugnut, "Megatron Rising - Part 1", Animated cartoon

"Don't just stand around with your pistons in your servos!"

—Sentinel Prime, "Predacons Rising", Animated cartoon

"They've been the biggest pumping pistons in the galaxy since before I was spat into this world."

—Rampage, "Cultural Appropriation", Beast Wars: Uprising

Piston rod

"We wanted to thank you for all that extra punishment, piston rod!"

—Wasp, "Autoboot Camp", Animated cartoon

Poppet valve

"If that's how you want to play this... ...which one of you poppet valves is next?"

—Arcee, "Devisive",The Transformers: Robots in Disguise comic

"It's about time I get a rematch with these poppet valves."

—Arcee, "Second Exodus",The Transformers: Robots in Disguise comic

Reactor linkage

"I repeat, Decepticons—surrender, or face the consequences!"
"Yeah, and we repeat—go stuff it up your reactor linkage!"

—Optimus Prime and Tailwind, "The Resurrection Gambit!", Marvel The Transformers comic

Skidplate

"Yeah? And you can just kiss my skidplate, fearless leader. 'Cause I ain't goin' out there and gettin' my pelt punctured!"

—Rattrap,^[1] "Beast Wars (Part 1)", Beast Wars cartoon

"You know me, I can't resist the upgrades."
"And you know me, Masterson. I can't resist kicking your skidplate!"

—Headmaster and Optimus Prime, "The Return of the Headmaster", Animated cartoon

Solenoid

"That's 'cause we kicked their sorry solenoids!"

—Bumblebee, "The Elite Guard", Animated cartoon

"The Elite Guard has done nothing but bust our solenoids since they got here!"

—Bumblebee, "Mission Accomplished", Animated cartoon

Sparkplug(s)

"The Arctic? Great. Another chance to freeze our sparkplugs off."

—Arcee, "Out of His Head", Prime cartoon

Sprocket

"Blow it out your sprocket, 'Chosen One.'"

—Acid Storm, "City on Fire", The Transformers: Robots in Disguise

See also Sprocket (G1).

Strut

"Strutless cowards!"

—Starscream, Infiltration #6

"Strutless fool. She's nothing."

—Onslaught, Spotlight: Arcee

Tailgate

"Let's kick tailgate!"

—one of Soundwave's cassettes, The Transformers: The Movie

See also Tailgate (disambiguation).

Tailpipe

"Now they've got their tailpipes between their legs!"

—Bombshell, "Quest for Survival", The Transformers cartoon

"Hey, if you took that broomstick out of your tailpipe every once in a while, you might have some fun for a change!"

—Rattrap, "The Agenda (Part 1)", Beast Wars cartoon

"Whoa! What crawled up your tailpipe?"

—Bumblebee, "The Thrill of the Hunt", Animated cartoon

"Come back here so that I can pull your pistons out through your tailpipes!"

—Hothead Blitzwing, "Sari, No One's Home", Animated cartoon

"What crawled up his tailpipe and died?"

—Miko, "Regeneration", Transformers: Prime cartoon

Thruster

"Fine. Whatever makes you a happy Decepticon. Just watch your rear thruster."

—Rodimus Prime, "The Return of Optimus Prime, Part 1", The Transformers cartoon

Transistor

"If you guys don't give me my circuit back, I'm gonna start kickin' transistor!"

—Gears, "Changing Gears", The Transformers cartoon

"We are in deep transistor parts!"

—Skyfire, "Day of the Machines", The Transformers cartoon

Turbocharger

"I'm goin', too. I'm gonna boot some Decepticon right in his turbocharger."

—Cliffjumper, "More than Meets the Eye, Part 1", The Transformers cartoon

Vent

"Cram it in your vent, ya psychopath!"

—Bumper, Megatron Origin #3

Waste-disposal unit

"Waspinator find Spider-bot and tear him a new waste-disposal unit!"

—Waspinator, "Other Voices, Part 1", Beast Wars cartoon

References