Together Tuesdays

Last week I talked about connections with strangers, this week I am sharing connections that grow between friends.

 I met Rose when I risked joining yet another group.

I had to give up sewing groups each time I moved, and so I tried one here. That one did not work out... too many of the women were rude and rejecting. I worried that would be the way it was here so it felt like  a risk to meet another group.
Anytime you meet someone it comes with a slight risk.

Three connections to chat about this week:

Rose and I were drawn to each other from the start, I'm sure you know that feeling.
Some back story...
My new group is small, about 8 women, but there was one person who threatened to break up the group before it got going.
That's the way human groups are, it takes one personality to sour the entire group. Polite people give up in the face of a difficult person who knows it all, and talks over others.

 The leader asked another member if she was willing to talk to the rude person about the problems.
The person decided to drop out. Because a tactful person took this role, the others in the group were then able to have meaningful experiences together, as the remaining women are respectful, kind, and encouraging.

What a life lesson to me.
Everyone deserves respect, but not everyone can work in every group.
We all would have missed out on a very nice group if we had let one particular person run over us.
And it was handled with kindness and respect for the offending person too.

Back to Rose. A gentle soul, a creative person who expresses herself in gentle works. She is trained as a fine artist, and her paintings find their way into her fiber work. She likes deconstructed representational quilts, with birds and human figures.
The images are blurred slightly, blending in soft color, abstract enough to lead your eye to telling the story yourself. Her intent is to quietly show that we may fray around our edges but we are still recognizable. She believes in the dignity of living creatures and nature.
I trust her.

to have a real friend, there must be trust. Trust that they come from a place of grace toward me and others. We may joke and do... humor is a big part of my life, but not at the expense of others.
There is plenty to joke about without hurting someone else, that's not really humor anyway. Making someone the butt of a joke is aggressive even if you call it joking.  It stops real connection. None of my real friends do that to each other.

Rose and I have begun doing things together outside the group, which allows us to risk being open and real with our feelings, building a friendship, a soft place to be. Our talk is about our real lives and experiences, and with her it's easy.

Last week,  we toured an art exhibit, where we could discuss each piece and our reactions to it.
Hearing another person's opinions is expansive to me, I learn and grow from it. I feel people can harden inside thinking their opinions are the only valid ones.

By sharing our opinions and reactions, and by accepting that opinions differ from ours, we grow. We may decide why we will continue to see things our way, or we might change slightly to include an idea we had not considered before.

Because we decided to trust each other, we learn about ourselves too. Our friendship is growing.

2. A second connection was with a library representative. In an annoying fashion, my password ceased working out of the blue. I called a representative hoping to correct the issue.

We did that dance of info, where I say that this happened 'out of the blue',  the rep says it couldn't have and doesn't make sense, then I say well it did happen, and she says, "well, ma'am..." and I say, "but it happened... how did it happen, did someone breach the database? She said, "there's nothing sinister that could have happened. I say, well it happened, and I can't request books now. (take a breath) A few moments go by

Then in a flash of insight, she asked, "did you request an inter-library loan this week"
me: "why yes I did. It went through, then I got notice it didn't go through, to ask for a librarian's help so I did and she made it work"

Rep: "ahhhhhh she must have used your phone for your password,  like most people do"
me: " but she didn't ask and I don't use those digits. Did she change my password?"
Rep: "yes"
Me: "can you change it back to the one I had?"
Rep: "sure" "just a minute"
So she changed it back. Mind you, the first one changed it without asking me, wasting a lot of time  sorting this out, and the second one "ma'am-d" me which sets me off, but... it finally was sorted out and I thanked her for finding the answer so I could relax and actually go back to using the system.
Nothing to do but just move on, she won't train the first person not to do that again, this could likely happen to me or others again, it was annoying and time consuming but... it's cleared up.
Next time, could we skip the patronizing, "ma'am..." -with-sigh at my bothering-her part?

Let me just say, I could easily have lost what little patience I have left, but I didn't this time.
I didn't respond to the patronizing tone, or the dismissive words, I slogged through repeating my words that were ignored the first time.

Some connections are not fun, but are productive.
I left the encounter with a grateful thank-you, hoping the next encounter she had would go easier on the people she helped. We have the choice with each connection, to make it smoother or rougher. We can react and say we're justified, and we are, or we can choose to leave content rather than prove we were right.  Just like in marriages.

number three this week happened on a neighborhood walk. I passed a woman who asked if I had a phone with me. I had met and chatted with her on a prior walk, just once but it was a pleasant exchange. Because we had met, she shared she locked herself out  of the house. The dog and two cats were watching her from the back door. When she went out, the door brace fell across the back slider and she was stuck.
Because we had met, she felt comfortable with me. I did not have my phone, as I do not want distractions when on a walk, from the peace. I asked what she would do, willing to have her walk home with me to call her husband to come with a key. She laughed and said she'd go next door and ask that neighbor to call.
It's good to know people in your neighborhood.

Milo just reminded me to tell you about seeing his friend Gunner. Gunner is about 8 months old, and a great dane. Last time Milo saw/played with him Gunner was Milo's size, and two nights ago, we saw gunner, now at 108 lbs he's twice Milo's size and Milo was shocked.
Gunner: " Hey buddy, it's still me!"
Milo: "are you sure? I mean you smell like you but sheesh! what happened to you, dog?"
Gunner: "I don't know.... I trip over my own legs!. But I'd still like to play sometime... have your peeps call my peeps!"
Milo: "er, maybe you should learn to control those long legs first? And maybe get the big boy surgery? I don't always trust boys who haven't had their surgery"
Gunner: "what are you talking about?"
Milo: "never mind" "bark at you later"

I wrote a bonus post on connection stories on Monday Here
If you write a post about a connection you made, good or bad, with anyone of your choice, let me know to include a link.

as always...
there is a moment in the day when you make a choice to connect with another person, or walk by.

I say, make more moments ones of connection than of isolation. They might last only a moment, but wouldn't you rather walk away smiling than not?

If you have a story of a momentary connection with others, I'd love to hear about it. Write a little post and I'll link to your blog. I'm planning on doing this each Tuesday. "Reach out and Touch-Tuesdays.

Linking to

cheesy photos at ched curtain

https://comedy-plus.wordless wednesday

"A Litter of Extroverts" A short story of love

A litter of Extroverts

Once upon a time there was a wee small cat family. The litter was small, only three kittens but they were highly interesting kittens. 

Even as babies,  they were different… Not a one was shy.

They were special. They would lead extraordinary lives.

And one human lady met them all… here is her story:

The woman had just said goodbye to her beloved poodle-son as he returned to Heaven. She was sad and a little lost without him. She felt lonely with no soft hair to pet, no expressive eyes to gaze into. Life felt so lonely. 

She took long walks. One day on such a walk she was taken by surprise when a bright sturdy orange cat ran toward her. Meowing loudly, it’s gaze was steady as it RAN toward her from half a block away! 

This cat smiled as if it recognized her, and had been waiting for her for years!

 “Finally! There you are! I’ve been waiting!”

This woman smiled for the first time in a long time. 

The orange cat loved her and the love of another creature was a link to her perished poodle. The cat was thrilled to wind in and around her legs, purring, meowing, accepting and giving love.

The woman’s heart swelled with the connection.

 After a bit she said goodbye to the little stranger and continued her walk. However, this cat was not done. He followed her matching step for step prepared to accompany her for miles. No leash needed to connect them. They walked on until, the woman became concerned that he might get lost or hit by a car. She told him this. 

He sat and looked up gently into her eyes, understanding her reluctance to break the connection, and her concern for his welfare. 

They looked into each other’s eyes for a while. 

He remained there while she took steps away, turned back to see him watching her leave. 

She marveled at this event for the rest of the walk, really she still does. 

Miraculously she saw him again days later and they now met as friends! Glorious meows and hellos mingled with petting from both! Again he was reluctant to watch her walk away, following her a block. Reluctantly they parted, both looking back. 

She let the good feelings of connection heal her broken heart. 

Again she assumed they would never meet again.

But…

A third time, as she walked with a friend, telling her the story of the healing cat, he appeared. Again they met as friends, this cat sending a message that he loved her. Reminding her she was lovable.

She never saw him again after the third time but later met another from what she began to know was the litter of extroverts. 

-2­-

On another long walk, with her husband, in a new neighborhood, another orange cat appeared. She was stunned to see this one running toward her, meowing loudly,

“Finally! There you are! I’ve been waiting for you! “

Just like the first cat, this one loudly meowed, adding in some Mreep! Sounds. Just like the other cat this one was waiting for her with an open heart. This one wanted her. This one also walked alongside her til she reluctantly asked it to stay near it’s home. 

As she turned back to check, there was no cat to be seen! 

“ OH! She’s gone! Did I imagine her?” 

Then she heard a loud Mreep! I’m here, do you need me? Stepping out from behind a hedge the cat said, "I’ll be here, I love you, you are lovable". 

And she was there when they returned to get in their car, as if she hadn’t seen them in weeks!

“Meow! Remember, I love you!” The woman looked back as they drove away.

Happy and a bit sad.

-3-

The woman walked and walked for weeks, wondering would she ever see the healing cats again. Don’t things happen in threes? But week after week no cats appeared. 

Until…

One evening a tortoiseshell cat ran toward her. 

Mouth open, trying to meow! 

He limped on an old paw injury, his tail was bent, he couldn’t sing like he used to. 

He was old and bent from age, but love is ageless. 

She wondered if his ears were bent from listening. 

Again he ran to her, wrapping her legs in a caress. Tying her up to keep her there. 

He tried to walk with her, stopping when she stopped, walking when she walked.  

 He was skinny under her hands, old and wise in the ways of the world, old in the ways of love.

Again she reluctantly explained he must not go far from home, and should be careful of cars. He looked deeply into her eyes, said he was old and knew that, but he walked by her side as long as possible.

 He said, “I love you, you are lovable” 

Later she learned, he lived nearby. He had lived in that house through two owners, and conveyed with the house. 

“Oh my little friend, what have you seen? Won’t you give lessons in connection to humans who need to learn?”

-4-

She was content now, having met three.

Never in her life had this happened! It was a message of some kind. A litter of extroverts…not born of the same parents, not sharing a home, but all the same in a big way. 

They all reached out to a woman…a walking wounded woman.

A woman who needed love.

And they gave it freely. 

The woman, me, recognized how special these encounters were. I was reminded in a very real way just how love is shared. How meaningful the love is that connects us. We are different yet all respond to love. 

One day I’ll find another poodle to love. The new poodle will not be Cole, as he wasn’t her labradaughter Chelsea.   Each bond has taught her about love.

Each bond told her she was not alone. 

The end (of a true story)

Ps just as I thought I would never have another cat encounter, an orange cat met us in Frederick City this weekend

“Meow! Finally! I’ve been waiting for you!” 

My husband and I looked at each other incredulously. Can it be? Again, he walked by our sides. This time he turned up toward a house and looked back as if to say, “if you lived here we could be together every day” 

We considered that

The unexpected gift

What a surprise!
My good friend Nancy pugmom sent this cutest flamingo wallet to me. She said she is making something for my May birthday but this will take it's place. I can hardly wait to see the treasure she's making as she is just a party on two legs! How did she know I like a flamingo (smirk)

Look how it came wrapped too. Her special card, and that's a great idea in and of itself, right?


That sparkly pink folded box, pink tissue paper, and this inside...

Well, it's just perfect. A perfect gift and a perfect surprise! I feel loved!
Then out of the blue yesterday my bee mate Diana surprised me with this...

It's a leather flamingo wristlet purse!!! In purple! Perfect! Perfect surprise!
She said she wanted to thank me for all I do for her, which is just being her friend, which is easy.

Look at it dangling from my fingers... note the pink plastic flamingos guarding the yard behind.

Check out the little leather legs!
The zipper, handle and it came with a lucky penny inside. Diana and I are Southerners. I think that's a Southern custom of including a penny. Another beemate said her Japanese roots dictate a 5 yen piece to go in any purse.



About two months ago another bee mate came in with this...

She found this funky beaded poodle at a yard sale and said she knew she had to get it for me. HA!
How'd she know I love poodles (double smirk)       Surprise! A gift for no reason, just because.
Because she's thoughtful.
So to keep this surprise gift thing going I made something for my friend recently seen again in Ohio, Maria
(see post HERE)  It will be winging it's way to her soon. She loves blue, so a blueberry pie pin cushion is her surprise gift.

my friend QuiltSwissy is doing a project giving away quilted items at random. Given or gotten any surprise gifts lately?

While in Ohio I visited with a friend...

Do you enjoy a little COLOR in your life?? ME TOO! 
The picture is of a fabric collection of solids belonging to my friend Maria Elkins (http://mariaelkins.com/)
Aren't they scrumptious? Inspiring?
Or like me, would you be reluctant to actually use them because they look so good like this?
I'm inserting this info : Maria organized her fat quarters by color, and by value, lightest to darkest on 8th row down! It's amazingly useful when you know you need a particular shade.

Maria and I met through the online QuiltArt group when she asked the group if anyone in Annapolis wanted to meet up while she was in town to tour universities with her daughter. I said yes!
We had a great visit then, kept in touch via emails, even chose the same focus word (JOY) last year!
When I decided to go to Ohio with my husband on his business trip, I contacted her and went by for another great visit. Allow me to brag about my friend for a moment...
She is an internationally known quilter, and you may remember this

one of her many fabulous portrait quilts
She has written articles for magazines won numerous awards, and is comfortable to be with. We shared stories and laughs, ideas and goals.
She invited Cole in as well, and he took to her right away.


She shared with me her quilt storage system

wardrobes on their sides just the right size to hold rolled quilts...

open sesame

We looked at a few quilts, and the current series she is working on.
Now is a good time to mention that one is never too experienced to grow and learn. She studied with Nancy Crow, ( I admit I am too intimidated to do that at the moment) and has incorporated the lessons learned into her own style.

We should all approach a class like that, in my opinion. Learn a skill or technique but don't copy a teacher's style of work. Make it original! That's my life's motto, or one of them.
Maria has written an article for Studio magazine also, because she designed a thread caddy and shared the plans to make one in that magazine. She set up her studio for work.

Another important point here... set up your workspace according to how you work, not according to a designer's suggestion or how it looked in a magazine. Figure out what you need, and where you need it, by working in there, then set it up for your personal usage.

And a working studio is often messy. It. Just. Is. 
We visited for several wonderful hours that flew by. It's like that when two friends meet again, doesn't matter if you haven't seen them in a long time. Your spirits meet and conversation flows.

It wouldn't have happened this time if I hadn't let her know I was coming, or if she wasn't open to taking the time away from work, or if she was out of town teaching (which she does, check out her website)

But it did happen and I am all the richer for it!

Cole... well that poodle fell in love with Maria's husband. After he nearly licked Maria's hands off, he moved on to her husband. When it was time to tear ourselves away Cole clearly wasn't ready yet...

I treated him like a toddler,. and said "Okay Cole, momma's leaving now, come on!" and I walked to the car. I opened the doors. He remained where he was

Until he walked right back to the front door with a shrugging look back at me.
Cole:
 "well, I liked them.
 I liked how they smelled, how they tasted and their energy was good. I was willing to stay longer.
 No one ever asks me if I'm ready to go yet. Sheesh! "
All good times eventually come to an end darlin' so you'll have to make-do with me and your dad/.

parallel play

What a fun afternoon spent with my fellow art quilter Steph.  (click for her website)

We have always had fun together, making stuff. We like to play. We like ink and paint, and thread and applique.We like humor and stories, and never run out of stuff to talk about.

 I had a lot to do today at home but the siren song of friendship was too much to ignore!!

I took some show and tell, a few stamps, and a new book to show her. She shared  her latest work, brought out her paints/inks and stamps and we started to play.





This was made with a rubber stamp, on white fabric. Then I used tsukineko ink pens to color it in and shade it.
Pretty.

I used some of my love stamps and some of hers, some of my ink pads and some of hers to make smitten.

Several stamps together, and colored in with pens. She asked what I will do with it.
I'm not sure but I will use it. When I play I don't stop to think what to make later...
Stephanie wanted some opinions on two pieces she's making.

I have opinions!!

We ended up shading one of her pieces with ink, and discussing options on a tote bag. It is always fun to collaborate on projects with her.

I imagine if we met as little girls, we'd have been coloring together, shoes off, giggling.

She enjoys making garments as well as quilts (and other art projects) so we discussed a batik for a top.
Clothing, stamping, sewing, what's not to like?

I came home to see this post by   threadingmyway.
It is about using vintage clothing patterns.
Vintage, like from MY childhood, lol.
She pointed out the tiny waists and I remember having to adjust patterns to my more athletic build.  Waist slightly larger in relation to hips.
I said I made my clothes thru high school, but it's much easier now to fit a bed.
It's basically a rectangle, but then so am I now!! smile.

Steph has two adorable cats that love me as I love them. I'm allergic to them but I love them.

Here's a short story, about her cat PJ who resembles the kliban cats from the 70's

and  he came running to me when I got there today. He immediately looked me in the eyes, and began rubbing against my legs. Uh oh, allergy city. He was put out to play and screamed at the door til we let him back in. He immediately ran to me, put his tiny front paws on my knee and looked into my eyes again.
Reluctantly I said no, I couldn't pet him but he should know how much I love and admire him.

 He left the room, but came back when I opened the ink pad. Very interested thinking it might be a treat.
So cute. Again, I was forced to say, no, it's not food, lovey. Dejectedly he ate some kibble and left the room again.
A bit later he returned wrapping around my leg again, and I had to say, "PJ... you know I love you right? I can't pet you but I love you. I'm allergic and must not play with you." He looked deeply into my eyes, and slowly turned around and left the room with no more contact.

I am reminded of my neighbor's daughter sitting with me on my front porch while Cole played in the yard.
She solemnly asked, "Miss LeeAnna, do you really think he understands you?"

I smiled and said, he does, every word. And he does. And so did PJ.
Luckily they understand English as I don't speak cat or dog.
I came home to chores and unfinished projects and was smiling because I got to connect with my friend today. And her cat.

What will you make this year? (Goals and machines)

Happy New Year to you all!

Do you have any sewing  goals for this year? Did you actually write them down so you don't forget?
Anyone put finish a few UFO's on their goal list?

I have spent several days in the studio, moving things around to sort and see what I have, and clear out some space for three quilt deadlines. I need to figure out how to get back on the exhibit entry circuit this year and take a class on how to use my new SLR camera for entry pictures. I also want to draw more, not to impress but to learn scale and shading. I want to use my books, do more beading, finish some started projects and start more. I want to look through my old quilting magazines and clear off the dining room table. (post on my magazine obsession click here!)

As if that will ever happen.

For me, there is a balance between cleaning up and putting things away, which gives me clarity and space to work... but...the other side of that is forgetting what I have and possibly not remembering where I stored it.

 I have many other goals as well. I finally bought a featherweight so I need/want to learn about the care and feeding of it, and use it to sew some scrap projects  in bee. Under the tree this year were two important black cases...

 One holds the SLR digital camera I need to take a class on digital photography. Hopefully that will lead to understanding of how to take a great picture for quilt show entries. The other case held this...

A 1951 centenial Singer featherweight.
I have wanted this machine for years, toying with the idea of getting a red one, but when a local woman approached our bee with the desire to sell her two I went over to see this one. It needs a tiny bit of adjustment, possibly a new belt and a bit of oil but it is so cool!! I am thrilled.
Now I must allow myself to use it. One of my goals is to learn the care and feeding from my hive mate Lynn and then start a sewin'

Each year I choose a word to explore for that year.
 Last year was ( enjoy another monk photo from last year)   ENJOY

Awe, here's my happy monk, the one who stayed on the mantle all year to remind me to enjoy the moments between the pain. This year he's joined by this year's Snowbaby. I try to get one each year, and didn't display them all this year but this one needed buying.
The gesture of love, the holding of the sweet bear close, the connection between them... had to have it.
Because
This year my word is connection, a verb or connections a noun and goal. 

When a person chooses ( or often a word chooses them)  a word to focus on for a year, it is surprising all that comes up.
 The universe kicked my butt when I chose RELEASE. I won't try to explain all I had to release that year but it wasn't easy. It was good, not easy. 

So this year I hope to explore connections in all forms, connecting to friends, myself, my work, my long term goals, the Earth and my spirituality, and not least of which my husband and poodle. I sure hope those of you here will consider being a part of my process this year!! I have made fantastic friends here. Friendships that can grow and blossom. 
A short story... we went contra dancing New Year's Eve.

  We met contra dancing in Tampa and have danced together in the greater DC area since we moved here about 20 years ago. We have gotten to know many people at these friendly dances but only a few that we see outside of the dances themselves. This year, during a break I bravely approached one of the couples we really like and told her about my word, and that I would love to set up a dinner date with them this year. I feared she would come up with excuses to keep a distance like so many people here do... but she didn't! She said, great! We'd love to. 

It's a start! 

I have written down goals in several categories. One of my goals is to start a link party of my own this year and I sure hope you will come share that with me. I spent the morning developing a quilt to use as the image for the link button!! It's really cool and I'm excited about it. 

What have you been up to and have you set any goals for yourself and quilting??
Thanks for reading and please stay in touch y'all!

Love, LeeAnna
linking to 15 sewing goals  as well as my other faves listed on links page

connections: whales, people, dophins to people

As you might know, I have been interested in connections for over a year now. Actually,  much much longer, but for the last year and a half I have actively been discussing them, making quilts for my connection project,(see this page for the scoop) and listening to people tell me  their connection stories.

 The first video is of the connection between whales. The baby rests on the mommy, she takes care to protect her baby. If it doesn't open on your reading devise: link to youtube
So for today, no sewing, just a few touching, connection stories on video. Please enjoy.

This one is such a good example of parenting, and teaching a child that they are connected to others and it's a good thing to feel empathy for others. We are never too young to feel connected to others. link to youtube
 
The next video is the connection between dolphins and people.

You can watch these right from my blog or go to youtube to see them. click
Love makes the world a better place. Think about what the word "connection" means to you, and...
Sewing is good too! Sew Chat again tomorrow.
LeeAnna