itch.io

First of all, I LOVED this demo!! I'm totally hooked to the story and I can't wait to see what happens next! Normally, I wouldn't do this but since you so kindly asked for feedback, I have a few small suggestions to what would make this story even better.

Generally, the writing was very well done, however at one point you use the phrase "Gleam some inspiration" when I'm fairly sure the word is actually 'glean'- a very easy mistake to make but if you're keen on making it as grammatically correct as possible, this would be a great place to start!

As a trans person, I enjoyed how customizable the character options were, but i wonder weather it's entirely necessary to have seperate options to weather a character is male/female or male/female but assigned another gender at birth. Having these as different options could appear to imply that a cis man/woman is a completly different identity to being a trans man/woman, which isn't necessarily true, especially when the wording asks 'what you identify as'. Unless it'll become a key plot point later on in the story, I think it would be best to just have female, male and nonbinary options in the future. Then again, this is a very nitpicky criticism which I'm sure most people wouldn't notice. I'm also only one guy speaking for a huge community and perhaps not everyone will agree with me.

Thank you, for making such a wonderful story and I wish you all the best in finishing it :)