Talk:Hamzeh Mirza Heshmat od-Dowleh

GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:Hamzeh Mirza Heshmat od-Dowleh/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Nominator: HistoryofIran (talk · contribs) 03:25, 11 November 2024 (UTC)

Reviewer: Borsoka (talk · contribs) 07:43, 28 November 2024 (UTC)

GA review – see WP:WIAGA for criteria

1. Is it well written?

   A. The prose is clear and concise, and the spelling and grammar are correct:

   B. It complies with the manual of style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation:

2. Is it verifiable with no original research, as shown by a source spot-check?

   A. It contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline:

   B. Reliable sources are cited inline. All content that could reasonably be challenged, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose):

   C. It contains no original research:

   D. It contains no copyright violations nor plagiarism:

3. Is it broad in its coverage?

   A. It addresses the main aspects of the topic:

   B. It stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style):

4. Is it neutral?

   It represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each:

5. Is it stable?

   It does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute:

6. Is it illustrated, if possible, by images?

   A. Images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content:

   B. Images are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:

7. Overall:

   Pass or Fail:

Comments

• Introduce Abbas Mirza shortly.
• He participated in the Herat war of 1837–1838, for which he was later rewarded with the governorship... Participated as? Introduce the Herat war shortly. Was he indeed rewarded solely for his participation in the war?
• Are Qazvin, Zanjan, Khorasan cities, districts of provinces? (Was he the governor of a city, a district or a province?) Some more details of their location? (Eastern/western/central Iran/near the capital Teheran/border province...)

Tried to make that more clear. --HistoryofIran (talk) 18:34, 1 December 2024 (UTC)

• ... for his misbehavior Examples?

No details given anywhere unfortunately. --HistoryofIran (talk) 18:34, 1 December 2024 (UTC)

• Later in the same year, he was given the governorship of Zanjan by his brother. Why did his brother forgive him in less then a year?

Unfortunately the source doesn't say. --HistoryofIran (talk) 23:34, 2 December 2024 (UTC)

• ...by his brother...by his brother...by his brother... Tweak the sentences.

Done. --HistoryofIran (talk) 23:34, 2 December 2024 (UTC)

• Could you add some infromation about Hasan Khan's revolt before mentioning Hamzeh's role in its supression?
• ...making some of the latter's followers join him Did he force or persuade them to join him?
• Introduce Mashad as a city and add some details of its location.
• ...the soldiers in Mashhad revolted ... Do we know why? Was this a garrison?
• ...also urged the populace to rebel Did they persuade them to rebel? Populace or townspeople/civil populace?
• Hamzeh Mirza was defeated by the rebels, subsequently taking refuge in the fortress of Mashhad. Rephrase.
• Around the same time, Hasan Khan Salar marched towards Mashhad. The word of Mohammad Shah's death spread throughout Mashhad as Hasan Khan Salar surrounded Hamzeh Mirza and his troops. Mohammad Shah was succeeded by his son Naser al-Din Shah (r. 1848–1896). Rephrase: 1. Mohammad Shah dies and is succeeded by his son; 2. Hasan Khan is marching towards Mashad. 3. News of the shah's death reaches Mashad and Hamzeh is surrounded.
• Why did Yar Muhammad change his mind?
• What does his title "Heshmat od-Dowleh" mean or indicate?
• They were informed of the violence between the Hajji-Khojalu and Damirchili tribes... The violence? Perhaps "They were informed that traditional feuds between .... had renewed .../They were informed that a conflict had broken out between ..../..."?
• ...subdue the Hajji-Khojalu... Why not the Damirchili?

Source doesn't say unfortunately. --HistoryofIran (talk) 23:34, 2 December 2024 (UTC)

• ...stop the Shahseven tribes from wintering on the Russian-ruled part of the Mughan plain Stop? Had they wintered traditionall on the plain?
• The British consul-general Stevens believed... Why is his opinion relevant? Believed or suggested?
• ...Hamzeh Mirza believed... Believed?
• ...the following year he once again received the governorship of Khuzestan and Lorestan Why was he forgiven?
• Do we know why he died? Borsoka (talk) 08:22, 28 November 2024 (UTC)

We don't unfortunately. --HistoryofIran (talk) 18:34, 1 December 2024 (UTC)

Hi again Borsoka, and thanks for another great review. I'll try to get to it as first as possible. HistoryofIran (talk) 21:14, 30 November 2024 (UTC)