I've Got A Happy Trucker!

This post is simply to say a HUGE HUGE HUGE public congratulations to my darling Toyboy Trucker because today he's passed his CPC!!! I'm SO proud of him. It was a killer - both in terms of studying and the legal, business, management and practical exams themselves - and although the slog was all over in February (and of course he was convinced he'd failed miserably) the results weren't known until today - and he's passed! All three exams! He's now fully qualified to run his own haulage company (if he ever wants to), has the top professional qualifications in road transport management and national road haulage, and is a STAR!

I do know how hard these exams are because when I wrote my lorry-driving novel - Running the Risk - Georgia, my heroine had to have a CPC in order to run her transport company and I sent for the study courses and exam papers as research. Sheesh! I was glad then it was only fiction.... Little did I know...

This is just the sort of joyous news we needed to lift our flagging post-wedding spirits while the Happy Couple are still frolicking in Hawaii and while I'm still dredging through the Moonshine proofs.

Hopefully we'll be celebrating wildly tonight!

However, I do have one reservation though - Toyboy Transport Manager simply doesn't have the same ring to to it somehow,does it?

Reality Check

The morning after the night before. Sad photo of Elle's forlorn and abandoned wedding dress (think she must have leapt out of it from a standing start!), unloved and unwanted on the floor of the honeymoon suite. Which just about sums it - and my current feelings - up...

Well, that's that then. Wedding all over; Elle and The Doctor frolicking in the surf on Waikiki Beach (they've sent phone-pics - bless them!); all staying-over friends have left - T&T have flown back to Jersey, J&I ditto to Switzerland, R,J,M & B have returned to York, and F&S have coupled up the caravan and headed back to Devon.

It's all over.... Sigh...

I've no doubt that I'll be using gratuitous snap-shot wedding photos to illustrate the blog posts for a while yet. Well, at least until we get the official ones and I can edit them for a hopefully suitable pic of the m-o-t-b outfit... However am now having grave concerns that the entire outfit was way-too-bling and that the vintage beaded jacket was just a tad too sparkly, and the silk frock was just a touch too frou-frou and the red satin killer heels were probably - well - frankly - tarty... Everyone said I looked nice. Nice isn't what I'd aimed for. I'd aimed for spectacular - and now think, with all the aforementioned doubts and having abandoned the fascinator as too silly for words and having forgotten to wear any jewellery (too much of a rush before getting Elle into her wedding dress), I actually looked like someone half-dressed for a fancy dress party. Will wait and see what the official photos show of course - but I'm not optimistic here...

Still outraged that the outlaws didn't even send Elle and The Doctor a wedding congrats card! Not one single one of them. Not even ma-in-law - and she was actually there (although under protest and VERY bad-tempered). Surely they could have managed a card? Wouldn't that just be good manners or a sort of family-friendly thing to do? As Elle and The Doctor didn't want presents, a card - especially when you've ditched attending the wedding at the last minute - wouldn't have been too much to ask? I think this just underlines their ignorance and rudeness and shows they clearly want nothing more to do with us -which is good because that's what they're going to get!

Hurrumph.... Sod 'em all!

And now today the Moonshine proofs have arrived - and I really, really must get back to work.

Sigh again....

So, on a writerly note (I AM a writer, I AM, I AM...)- I've sold yet another short story to Yours (this seems to be my target market at the moment - and very welcome given the rapid demise of magazine fiction generally) - so thanks again Womag - wouldn't have done this without you. Am 5 chapters into Midnight Feast and have side-lined Off The Wall for a while. Have also had a couple of ideas for new series to follow on from the practical magic ones and am hoping my agent and editor will also think they've got legs - the stories, that is, not my agent and ed...

Oooh, yes! And I've had royalties again!!!! Loads and loads of royalties!!! Got really excited about it - it's a rare occurrence for me I can tell you, but one I could get used to. Have been very, very circumspect and shovelled them away for a) the next tax bill, b) unexpected disasters/household bills, and c) those months later in the year when I know (wise after the event and having now read my contract!) when I won't have any nice chunks of money. Still, it's kept the bank happy and made me smile. And After The Wedding, smiles are in short supply here, I can tell you.

And thanks to my wonderful German publishers buying my entire back list, I've been having an ongoing conversation with my German translator/editor because she's currently working on Hubble Bubble and there's a mention of my hero resembling Heath Ledger in it, and because of HL's sad and untimely death, we both felt it would be better to replace him with another movie star... And - eeek - she wanted Leonardo di Caprio. Now, I'm sure little Leonardo is lovely in his own way, but he certainly isn't how I see my wild-haired, dangerous-dark-eyed, sexy Shay. We've argued for a couple of days and I think I've now convinced her that Johnny Depp would be a worthy stand-in for poor Heath... Will let you know.


And coming right down to earth, have just taken Jonah (above) to the vet for his twice-yearly check-up on his ongoing ulcerative gingivitis (all clear) - and discovered during the tests that he possibly has hyper-thyroidism... He had to have more bloods taken which have been sent away for analysis and we'll get the results on Monday. If they're positive for hyper-thyroidism our lovely vet explained it'll involve either life-long medication or surgery. Either of which will chomp nicely into the royalties - sigh... Still, as The Toyboy Trucker and I would sell our souls twice over for Jonah we'll do whatever it takes....

And now I will open the folder that says WIP - and Will Get On With It! When I've done the Moonshine proofs, and looked at the wedding pics again, and slashed and hacked the jungly bits in the garden, and cuddled Jonah and....

WOW!!!

So - Elle looked totally, totally beautiful. The Doctor looked wonderfully handsome. Neither of them were nervous. Neither of them ever stopped smiling for a minute all day. The Toyboy Trucker and I have now got the most wonderful, kind, gentle, funny and amazing son-in-law in the world. The bridesmaids were sensational. The best man was a star. The weather was warm - it was partly cloudy but the sun shone brightly all afternoon, and despite the dire forecast there was no rain, and no wind at all. The stately home venue was out of this world - and the whole day went like a dream. No, it was even better than that - it was a living, breathing fairytale.

Take back all I've ever said on this blog about the whole thing being way, way OTT and a huge waste of money - it was simply breath-taking. It was the best day of Elle and The Doctor's life - and of mine. Everyone there (over 200 of them) said they'd never experienced anything like it!!! Thank you, thank you, thank you for all your support - you were absolutely right - those outlaws who opted out simply don't know what they missed - and to be honest we didn't even notice they weren't there. It was the most blissful - um - counting on fingers here - 20 hours of my life...





Will just post a few pics today - like this one of Elle sharing a joke with her lovely new in-laws - but as these are ones I took, there were huge gaps in the proceedings when I couldn't get at my camera (the actual ceremony and the reception and the speeches etc) - and the official ones won't be available until Elle and The Doctor are back from Hawaii in May - there possibly won't be any of me in the m-o-t-b frock for a while (phew!) but I think they give some idea of what it was like... An absolute dream come true... Huge sigh of happiness...


Elle and The Doctor had planned it down to the last minute detail - it wasn't simply a wedding, it was a true celebration of their love and a fusion of cultures and an entertainment event no-one will ever forget!!!



From the second The Doctor and his family swept up the drive in a cavalcade of cars all bedecked with red and gold ribbons and playing bhangra music, on to me helping Elle into her dress, both of us amazingly calm and happy, through the heart-stopping moment when The Toyboy Trucker walked Elle so proudly down the aisle of the 16th century wedding room, all through the beautiful, emotional and very personal marriage service, through the champagne-and-Pimms reception on the terraces and in the glorious gardens while the official photos were being taken, on to the Indian banquet Wedding Breakfast (in a fabulously decorated dining room awash with red and gold, masses of flowers, and the most gorgeous HUGE garlanded Ganesh - all this, I must add, presided over by an ex-Blues and Royals toast master in full regalia and complete with his Buckingham Palace ceremonial sword for cutting the fabulous three-tiered, three-flavoured chocolate wedding cake!!!),



then the amazing moment after the meal when the black curtains, all twinkling with thousands of white pin-prick lights, swept back to Elvis's "Viva Las Vegas" to reveal a full-blown casino! There were roulette wheels and black jack tables and fruit machines - and proper croupiers - and everyone was given a starting $100 to play with!!!




Then there were two bands - one bhangra, one rock - and then, when it was properly dark, a spectacular twenty minute firework display (certainly the most amazing display I've ever seen!) in the grounds with more champagne and strawberries. And then, when we all thought we couldn't manage any more, we all swept back into the ballroom and danced until dawn to the rock band while waiters circulated with huge bowls of chips, hot bacon rolls, nice veggie samosas and things like that - and of course cake, cake and more cake... Then we all staggered off to our bedrooms (everyone stayed overnight) to emerge bleary-eyed a few short hours later for a Full English...


Oh, and this final pic is a clutch of Mates From The Estate just about to bombard Elle and The Doctor with confetti...

And, in case you were wondering, apart from a few tears when Elle and The Toyboy Trucker first walked down the aisle, I didn't cry! I even did my reading and a small speech in the reception without faltering, and just think I was far too happy to cry... Awwww - it was truly the Best Day Ever - and I don't think I'll EVER come down to earth!

Four Days and Counting

Just back from The Final Fitting of THE DRESS which is now hanging, swathed in a white protective carrier, on the back of the bedroom door. I'm actually surprised I can see to type as I'm still moist-eyed and soggy. I sniffed bravely as Elle stepped into it, snuffled not-at-all-bravely as the fitters all fussed around nipping and tucking, then howled uncontrollably as she finally swept into the showroom.

O-M-G. All those years ago when Elle was tiny and she'd teeter around the bedroom in my shoes and a net curtain playing weddings I'd hoped that one day it'd be the Real Thing. And now it is. And she looked so beautiful (of course I'm TOTALLY unbiased) - and that's without the hair-do and the make-up and the additional tiddly accessory things... She'll blow them away... She looked radiant and calm and just so HAPPY. The dress is sensational - just right for the princess wedding she's always wanted -and so is she... Elle, if you're reading this, I'm SO proud to be your mum.

Then there were the bridesmaids to final-fit, and me - and the whole place was awash with net and silk and frou-frous of every imaginable type. And despite us being in crack-of-dawn Tuesday morning scruffy-ish hair and minimal slap, I think we all looked wonderful. And in FOUR days time it'll be the Real Thing. FOUR days!!!

On Sunday the boys had their final suit fittings and they were transformed too. And yes, I cried - again. Writing has been abandoned, emails have gone unanswered (sorry!), all normal life is on hold until After The Wedding. I'm wallowing in every joyous minute of this. And it's all gone wonderfully to plan - except for the weather forecast of course - and they might be wrong about that (and even if they aren't it's the one thing we can't alter so I am not going to worry about it - honest)...

There is one other minor hiccup which I'll gloss over in as few a words as possible as I've done my stomping and swearing and ranting and screaming in private. The Toyboy Trucker's family have decided (at the eleventh hour) that they won't be coming.

I'm not going to expand on the reasons why or how I feel about it because the blog would probably explode - but suffice it to say the "family" table will now look a little bare... As I have no family it was all down to my in-laws to wave the flag for our side. Something they all seem unable to do now - despite all having replied to their invites in the affirmative. I'm hurt, Elle's hurt, The Toyboy Trucker is hurt - but hell, that's families for you. I'm actually glad today that I haven't got one.

All our friends, some of whom are travelling immense distances, Elle's friends, The Doctor's friends and family (who will be there in supportive force, bless them) and the entire estate (and you should see some of their wedding outfits - amazing!!!) will more than make up for the ill-manners of my outlaws (who you'll be unsurprised to know I have now excommunicated for ever). And it's their loss - and all the more food and drink for the rest of us.

And as everyone told me there'd be at least one hitch, and everything else has gone smoothly, if the lack of family support is the hitch then so be it. We won't miss them - but I have a feeling they may well miss us in the future.

Am now going to help Elle pack her trousseau (isn't that a lovely old-fashioned romantic word?) for their honeymoon - they're off to Hawaii for three weeks and I'm not in the smidgiest jealous (hah!) - and practice walking on my killer heels again and try to rehearse my in-service reading without bawling...

Four days to go!!!!!

April Fool?

I've always thought it was highly appropriate that my only child should have been born on April 1st. Nature, not content with giving her a slightly skewed mother, made sure she had a birth date that everyone else would snigger at...

And I couldn't even use the old adage about "April Fools jokes are only valid until mid-day" as she was born at 9.20 a.m. Duh!

So, we spent her childhood informing all the playground bullies and those prissy little girls with angelic eyes and vitriolic tongues that you get in every mixed infants class, that being born on April Fools Day was A Good Thing, A Happy Thing, A Funny Day, A Day When Everyone Becomes A Prankster - sort of like an early comic relief...

Mercifully, Elle has always been a strong-minded and very grounded child (amazing given she has me as a mother) and has long since risen above being labelled an April Fool. Now she enjoys sharing her birthday with such mixed luminaries as Philip Schofield, Otto von Bismark, David Gower and Ali MacGraw - and being April 1st babies doesn't seem to have harmed their careers.

When Elle was little we used to make the most of the day by throwing childhood parties that were a cross between a circus and the Edinburgh Fringe. You didn't get in to our caravan (another story!) unless you were dressed up in something amusing and could tell jokes.

So - Happy Funny Birthday, Elle, have a wonderful day, enjoy the meal tonight - and I'm really sorry...