Secret of Good Relationships

TRUST
is a very important factor for all

TRUST relationships. When trust is broken, it is the
end of the relationship. Lack of trust leads to
suspicion, suspicion generates anger, anger
causes enmity and enmity may result in
separation.
A telephone operator told me that one day she
received a phone call. She answered, 'Public
Utilities Board.' There was silence. She
repeated, 'PUB.' There was still no answer.
When she was going to cut off the line, she
heard a lady's voice, 'Oh, so this is PUB. Sorry,
I got the number from my Husband's pocket
but I do not know whose number it is.'
Without mutual trust, just imagine what will

happen to the couple if the telephone operator
answered with just 'hello' instead of 'PUB'
NO POINTING FINGERS
A man asked his father-in-law, 'Many people

praised you for a successful marriage.
Could you please share with me
your secret?‘ The father-in-law
answered in a smile, 'Never
criticize your wife for her
shortcomings or when she does
something wrong. Always bear
in mind that because of her
Shortcomings and weaknesses,
she could not find a better
husband than you.'
We all look forward to being loved and
respected. Many people are afraid of
losing face. Generally, when a
person makes a mistake, he
would look around to find a
scapegoat to point the finger
at. This is the start of a war.
We should Always remember
that when we point one
finger at a person, the other
Four fingers are pointing at
ourselves.
If we forgive the
others, others will
ignore our
mistake too.
CREATING A PERFECT RELATIONSHIP?
A person visited the government matchmaker for marriage, SDU, and requested 'I am looking for a
spouse. Please help me to find a suitable one.' The SDU officer said, 'Your requirements, please..' 'Oh,
good looking, polite, humorous, sporty, knowledgeable, good in singing and dancing. Willing to
accompany me the whole day at home during my leisure hour, if I don't go out. Telling me interesting
stories when I need companion for conversation and be silent when I want to rest.' The officer listened
carefully and replied, 'I understand you need television.'
There is a saying that a perfect match can only be found between a blind wife and a deaf husband,
because the blind wife cannot see the faults of the husband and the deaf husband cannot hear the
nagging of the wife. Many couples are blind and deaf at the courting stage and dream of perpetual
perfect relationship. Unfortunately, when the excitement of love wears off, they wake up and discover
that marriage is not a bed of roses. The nightmare begins.
NO OVERPOWERING It is not easy to change. Thus, having high
expectation on changing the spouse character will
Many relationships fail because one party tries to cause disappointment and unpleasantness.
overpower another, or demands too
much. People in love tend to think It would be less painful to change
that love will conquer all and their
spouses will change the bad habits ourselves and lower our
after marriage. Actually, this expectations...
is not the case. There is a
Chinese saying which
carries the meaning
that 'It is easier to
reshape a
mountain or
a river than a
person‘s
character.‘
RIGHT SPEECH
There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "A speech will
either prosper or ruin a nation." Many relationships break off because of wrong speech. When a
couple is too close with each other, we always forget mutual respect and courtesy. We may say
anything without considering if it would hurt the other party.
A friend and her millionaire husband visited their construction site. A worker who wore a helmet saw
her and shouted, "Hi, Emily! Remember me? We used to date in the secondary school." On the way
home, her millionaire husband teased her, "Luckily you married me. Otherwise you will be the wife of
a construction worker." She answered ,"You should appreciate that you married me. Otherwise, he
will be the millionaire and not you."
Frequently exchanging these remarks plants the seed for a bad

relationship. It's like a broken egg - cannot be reversed.
PERSONAL PERCEPTION
Different people have different perception. One

man's meat could be another man's poison. A
couple bought a donkey from the market. On the
way home, a boy commented, 'Very stupid.
Why neither of them ride on the
donkey? 'Upon hearing that,
the husband let the wife ride
on the donkey. He walked
besides them. Later, an
Old man saw it and
commented, 'The
husband is the head of
family. How can the wife
ride on the donkey while
the husband is on foot?‘
Hearing this, the wife quickly
got down and let the
husband ride on the
donkey.
Further on the way home, they met an old Lady. It seems to be the only choice left. Later, on a
She commented, 'How can the man ride on the narrow bridge, the donkey was frightened and
donkey but let the wife walk. He is no gentleman.' struggled. They lost their balance and
The husband thus quickly asked the wife to join fell into the river. You can never have
him on the donkey. Then, they met a young everyone praise you, nor will everyone
man. He commented, 'Poor donkey, how can condemn you. Never in the past, not at
you hold up the weight of two persons. present, and never will be in the future.
They are cruel to you.' Hearing that, the
husband and wife immediately Thus, do not be too
climbed down from the donkey bothered by others
and carried it on their words I f our conscience is
shoulders. clear...
BE PATIENT
This is a true story which happened in the States. A
man came out of his home to admire his new
truck. To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son
was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint
of the truck. The man ran to his son, knocked him
away, hammered the little boy's hands into pulp as
punishment. When the father calmed down, he
rushed his son to the hospital..
Although the doctor tried desperately to save the

crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the
fingers from both the boy's hands. When the boy
woke up from the surgery and saw his bandaged
stubs, he innocently said, 'Daddy, I'm sorry about
your truck.' Then he asked, 'but when are my
fingers going to grow back?' The father went home
and committed suicide.
Think about this story the next time someone steps on your
feet or you wish to take revenge. Think first before you lose
your patience with someone you love. Trucks can be repaired..
Broken bones and hurt feelings often can't. Too often we fail to
recognize the difference between the person and the
performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than
revenge.
People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But

the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.

Secret of Good Relationships

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TRUST

is a very important factor for all

Without mutual trust, just imagine what will

A man asked his father-in-law, 'Many people

Frequently exchanging these remarks plants the seed for a bad

Different people have different perception. One

Although the doctor tried desperately to save the

People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But

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