CHAPTER III- Connecting Through Verbal

Communication
Language – the chief component of speech
-a purely human invention of symbols that represent ideas, objects, feelings and experiences.
Linguistic communication- is the carrier of human heritage.
Verbal communication- is the spoken language.
-are ideas expressed in words.
Words- are determined by style and personality.
Style- is the way one chooses words and arrange these words to sentences. Style varies. One person has
his/her own way of expressing himself/herself. There are times that the words chosen may not be
acceptable to some listeners. Verbal style is very much connected with role. Professionals, for example,
are expected to grammatically correct sentences both in private and professional life.

Verbal communication is controlled by many factors. Aside from style and personality (who the person
is), language choices are important factors to be considered. Command of language requires years of
practice and study. It is quite impossible to lay down strict rules that govern the choices of language.
Different occasions require different language choice for different audiences with different levels of
knowledge. The language which is acceptable to one group maybe questionable and incomprehensible
to another.

The Importance of Language

Language- a structured system of signs, sounds, gestures or marks that is used and understood to
express
ideas and feelings among people within a community, nation, geographical area, or cultural
tradition.
-Without language there would be little or no human communication.
-allows people to encounter the world in meaningful ways.
-a powerful tool, but is only effective and efficient as the people using it.
-communicates what people are and what they think and therefore must be carefully used.

Language Is Powerful
How many times have we walked through a crowd of strangers and momentarily paused when we
thought we heard someone call our name? Why? Our names are not just names or words. Our names
define who we are. If any one thing that is universal, it is a name. At every place and at every time,
everyone has received a name. Names brand us with distinctive marks that separate us from the rest of
the herd and, at the same time, make us a part of it. Names are so important. For example, people
change their names when the change better fits them or when their given names do not truly
demonstrate their perceptions of themselves. Name calling can also affect individuals. If you have ever
been told you were "stupid" or been called "sissy" or "weirdo," we know how name calling can hurt us.

Feminists raise issues about perspectives on language because they want an inclusive world. In a recent
CRTNET (Communication Research and Theory Network) posting on the National Communication
Association emailed list, communication scholar Anita Taylor pointed out how even Internet sources use
language and images to perpetuate male perspectives. Language can create biases for both men and
women. When we hear the words “medical doctor” what image comes to mind? What about a strong
leader? When you hear "nurse" image the image? We often think of leaders and medical doctors as men
and nurses as women, but, that is not always the case.

Language Affects Thoughts

The misuse of language involves more than the misuse of words. Misused language affects our ability to
think. Thought and language are inseparable. Most scholars agree that words help us to form thoughts.
How many times have we found ourself struggling to find the word and without it, we could express
what we really want. When we take time to think a minute, however, the word usually appears. It is
important to carefully consider language choices before we speak. We cannot erase what we said. We
cannot correct or retract a statement and apologize for it but we cannot eliminate the fact that we said
it.

When we communicate, we first form thoughts and then decide how we're going to express them.
Competent communicators begin with clear thinking, followed by careful language choices that reflect
an understanding of what language is, how it is used, and what effects it might have on listeners.

The Elements of Language

Four different but related phenomena.
 language- is a structured system of signs, sounds, gestures or marks (symbols) that allows
people to express ideas and feelings to others
 talk- is what we say and use everyday
 speech- is one vehicle used to transmit language; and
 communication- involves the exchange of meanings.

Language is one means which we communicate, and speech is one way in which we use language. We
use language to create talk, to create ourselves, and to share ourselves and our views with others.
Talking is what we do in our everyday lives, and communication is the process we engage in to be able
to make sense of it all.

Four Key Elements of Language

1. Sounds- Most of us learn to speak language before we learn to write it, and most of us are born with
the physical mechanisms that enable us to make speech sounds. Our voice is the best suitable
instrument through which our ideas are transferred as sounds for listeners to hear.
2. Words- are symbols that stand for objects and concepts.
-can represent an object or an abstract concept. Example: “Desk” is concrete whereas “love” is
abstract.
Words have meanings because communities and cultures give them meaning. People agree that certain
sound combinations mean certain things to them. One of the intriguing things about languages is the
idioms, or words whose meanings cannot be understood by the ordinary usage.
3. Grammar- Just as language has rules that govern how sounds may be joined into words, it also
languages that govern how words may be joined into phrases and clauses and sentences.
 As we join sounds together to form words and join words together to form phrases, clauses,
sentences and paragraphs, we language's sound and grammar systems simultaneously. The ability to use
sounds and grammar correctly is crucial to competent communication. Grammar enables us to make
complete sentences and to understand the sentences made by others.

Despite the many rules that govern language, there is virtually no limit to the number of different
messages that can be created. It has been estimated that in the English language, it is possible to create
ten quintillion twenty- word sentences. This does not include sentences either shorter or longer than
twenty words. Thus, the number of possible sentences and messages is nearly infinite.

4. Meaning
Semantics- the study of meaning, or the association of words with ideas, feelings, and contexts
Language did not have meaning, it would serve little or no purpose. Because words and word patterns
can be used to exchange meanings between people and even between generations, language is a useful
tool for communication.

Things to be considered about meaning:

a. Do Words Contain Meaning?
We tend to associate language symbols (words) with specific meanings and to take that relationship for
granted.

Words are symbols that represent people, objects, concepts and events. For example, computer, yellow,
buildings, car, freedom and tyranny are only words, not the entities they symbolize. It is easy to miss this
distinction. Even though words are symbols, try screaming "Snake!" in front of someone who dislikes
snakes, and you will quickly see how words cause reactions, as if they are actual thing!
The belief that words have meaning in themselves is widespread. But the simple fact is that words do
not contain meanings by themselves. Words only acquire meaning through the context in which they are
used and the fact that those who use them give them meaning.

Who determines meaning? The answer is us. We control which words we use, the meaning we wish to
give them, and, if we have mastered the art of communication, we know how people react to them.
Although everyone has the ability to impart meaning to words, not everyone does so in the same way.
Thus, a sender might intend one meaning for a message, but the receiver might either intentionally or
unintentionally give the message a different meaning. Disparity between the meaning sent and the
meaning received can be a greater problem when the sender and receiver have different cultural
backgrounds or even different experiences and knowledge. For example, people who keep up with
computers and technology often use specialized language that is unfamiliar to someone who doesn't
have much knowledge about computers. Care in choosing words is especially important in such
situations.

b. Words Have Denotative and Connotative Meanings.

Denotation- is the common meaning associated to the word
- its standard dictionary definition.
Denotative meanings- usually readily understood.
Examples: Elephants are huge animals. Horse runs fast.
Connotation- is the subjective meaning of a word
-word that has a shaded meaning.
Connotative meaning- based on the context in which the word is used, how the meaning is expressed
nonverbally (tone of voice, facial expression, and so on), and the understanding of the person who is
receiving it. The competent communicator can differentiate between denotative and connotative
meanings and understands which is being used in a given situation. Connotative meanings may be
generally accepted by most of the people who use the language, by people within a particular group, or
by an individual.
Examples of denotation and connotation:
Denotation: Poisonous snakes are dangerous.
Connotation: My best friend turned out to be a snake in the grass.
Denotation: Horses run fast.
Connotation: I'm so hungry I can eat a horse.

Words Can Be Concrete or Abstract

Concrete words- are symbols for specific things that can be pointed to or physically experienced (seen,
tasted, smelled, heard or touched). For example, words such as car, book, house and cake are concrete
words.
-represent specific, tangible objects, and therefore their meanings are usually quite
clear. We can even make concrete words more specific with Volkswagon, The Bible, my house
and chocolate cake. Consequently, communication based on concrete word leaves little room for
misunderstanding, and any disagreement can typically be resolved by referring to the objects
themselves.

Abstract words- are symbols for ideas, qualities, and relationships.

-represent things that cannot be experienced through senses, their meanings depend on
the experiences and intentions of the person using them.
-words such as happiness, faith, freedom and justice stand for ideas that mean different
things to different people.

Language Can Obscure Meanings- Words mean different things to different people, based on each
person's experiences and the direct relationship of those experiences to particular words. For example, a
medical says, "Your mother has myclodysplastic syndrome." You're already upset that your mother has
been ill and doctors could not find out what was wrong and now you're also confused because you do
not know what is the meaning of the medical term used by the doctor. The medical team realizes that
translating the medical term to something which you understand is better. So bone marrow failure or
problems with blood cells will make it easier for the family and the patient to understand. Learning to
choose more understandable words will help the family comprehend the nature of the disease as well as
the treatment needed and reduce some of the frustrations about lack of knowledge and information.

Also, the meaning of words themselves, change from time to time and from place to place. It is easy to
forget that the meaning of a word might not match the meaning held by others. For example, a person
over age sixty may not know the meanings of these words: grass, geek, pot, joint, gay, high, stoned as
how the young people use them.

Words meanings also vary from region to region and cultures and cocultures hold differing meanings for
certain words. For example, for most Americans very dear means something that is highly valued or
loved, whereas in Ireland, very dear means very expensive and has nothing to do with value or love.

Cocultures within a language community sometimes use words or phrases in ways that are unique to
their groups. Scientists, engineers, and health care providers use language that might be to specialized to
be understood by the general public. This unique language use is referred to as jargon. Other cocultures,
such as students might use slang or words to communicate only with those who know the words and
meanings change quickly. A car salesperson might use a slang term such as flea to identify a person
looking for a bargain. Prisoners refer to a knife or to stab as shank.

Examples of Slang:
Bitch- a rude, mean person usually a female
Cool- neat, exciting, awesome
Chill/Chill out- to relax, rest calm down

Are these terms still commonly used? Have new slang words replaced them? Such words are constantly
being discarded and new ones invented. All kinds of groups, including members of a given profession,
college students, ethnic groups, and gangs, develop and use slang terms.

Euphemism- used to obscure, distort, or hide meaning. One way to obscure meaning is to use
euphemism.
-is an inoffensive or mild expression given in place of one that may offend, cause
embarrassment, or suggest something unpleasant.
-society use it to avoid taboo subjects or words that can trigger negative reactions.
-Employing it can defuse the emotional; charge associated with controversial or difficult
concepts.
Examples of Euphemism:
died- passed away
old people- senior citizens
squatters- informal settlers
poor- less privileged
abnormal child- mentally challenged

Language and meaning are inseparable parts of communication. They mesh smoothly in successful
communication.

Language-Based Barriers to Communication

Even if we create what we think is the perfect message, the possibility always exists that the receiver will
misinterpret the message or find it ambiguous. Therefore, the receiver must also make an effort to
receive the intended message. Misunderstandings occur for numerous physical, mental, and cultural
reasons. Ineffective use of language is one reason. Among the most common language- based barriers to
effective communication are: bypassing, indiscrimination, and polarization.

1. Bypassing. What is meant by a speaker and what is heard and understood by the listener often differ.
Such misunderstanding between a sender and a receiver . How many times have we said to someone,
"But that's not what I meant."

Bypassing takes place when two people assign different meanings to the same word. Many words word
are often to an almost limitless number of interpretations.

According to some estimates, the 500 most frequently used words in the English language have over
14,000 dictionary definition. Considering that dictionary definition reflects only a tiny percentage of all
possible for a word and that people from different cultures and with experiences interpret words
differently, it is amazing that people can understand one another at all.

2. Indiscrimination is the neglect of individual differences and the overemphasis of similarities.

Indiscrimination is a form of perceptual set in which a person chooses to ignore differences and changes
in events, things, and people Language plays a significant role in the tendency to see similarities between
things, even when they don't exist. Nouns that categorize people (teenager, divorce, student, professor,
African American, government official, politician and others) encourage people to focus on similarities.
Statements such as: "Politicians are crooks." "Teenagers are unruly" may be interpreted to include all
politicians and all teenagers, instead of some politicians and some teenagers. Such categorization often
results in stereotyping.

A stereotype is categorizing of events, objects and people without regard to unique individual
characteristics and qualities. Stereotypes are often negative, but they may also be positive. For example,
"All teachers are dedicated professionals," "All environmentalists are concerned citizens." Whether the
stereotype is negative or positive, the problem is the same: Individual qualities are ignored. Stereotyping
is quick and easy to do because it does not require analysis, investigation or thought.

3. Language Can Cause Polarization

Polarization is the tendency to view things in terms of extremes - rich or poor, beautiful or ugly, large or
small, high or low, good or bad, intelligent or stupid, even though most things exist somewhere between.
This either-or black or white of thinking is aggravated by aspects of language.

Polarization can be destructive, escalating conflict to the point at which two parties simply cannot
communicate. Speakers can avoid the dangers of polarization by recognizing the potential for
misunderstanding and by making statements that do not represent unnuanced extremes.

4. Language Can Be Sexist.

When men and women communicate with each other, there is the potential for clash and conflict
because of different language use. The problem is magnified when sexist language is used either
consciously or unconsciously. The goal for smooth communication is to use gender-inclusive language
that does not discriminate against males or females.

Unfortunately, the English language is structured with an inherent bias in favor of men. There are, for
example, no singular gender-neutral pronouns in the English language. Therefore, traditionally, the
masculine pronouns (he, him, his) have been used to refer to people in general, even if the referent
could be male or female. Use of the masculine pronoun is not incorrect grammatically, but its use in
generic situations is a social issue. Language sets expectations that at times discriminate against
stereotype people. According to traditional usage, the omnipresence of he or him and the general
absence of she or her subtly but powerfully give the impression that men hold important roles but
women do not. Thus, language creates the expectations that males are active and have important roles,
whereas females are inactive and do not have important roles. When a speaker constantly uses only
female or only male pronouns such as "she can expect this," or "it is in his best interests," members feel
excluded will believe the message has little or no relevance to them. When that happens, about 50
percent of the listeners may not be interested and may not pay attention to information that could be
vitally important to them.

Sexual stereotypes and the assumption that one gender is superior characterize sexist language. Words
with positive connotation are often used to describe males - independent, logical, strong, confident,
aggressive; females are often associated with words having negative connotations dependent, illogical,
weak, gullible, timid. Sexist language suggests that one gender is more important than and superior to
the other. Language that is used to discriminate can be quite subtle. Consider these statements: "She is
the president of the company and she's a woman"; "Wanda got that position because she's a woman."
They describe women who have risen to high positions, but they also imply that women do not typically
hold these positions or that the only reason Wanda got the position was because she's a woman. In
other words, they imply that women are less qualified than men.

Gender stereotypes influence perceptions and behaviors of both men and women. Stereotypes of
women affect both how they are treated in society and how they think of themselves. Language is one
significant means of perpetuating these stereotypes. Avoiding sexist language and substituting gender-
inclusive terms represent a positive step toward doing away with them.

How to Use Language Effectively

People of all ages, cultures, and educational levels use language everyday. Nevertheless, the ability to
use language efficiently and effectively requires years of practice and study. Although many variables
influence the effectiveness of language use, five aspects of language merit special attention. They are
accuracy, vividness, immediacy, appropriateness, and metaphor.

1. Use Accurate Language

Using accurate language is important to a speaker. Choosing a wrong word can distort your intended
message, misguide your receiver and undermine your credibility. When you speak, your goal should be
precision.

Don't leave for misinterpretation. You should constantly ask yourself what do I want to say?" and "What
do I mean?" if necessary, consult a dictionary to be sure you have chosen the correct word to express
your message.

The more words you can use accurately, the more likely that you will find the one you need to make your
meaning clear. You must expand your vocabulary. Two of the best ways to do this are through listening to
others and reading. Pay attention to words that you don't understand. Whenever you come across an
unfamiliar word, determine the context in which it is used, and consult a dictionary to find its meaning.
Once you have learned a new word, try to put it to use. Words that are not used are usually forgotten.
Expanding your vocabulary takes effort and time, but with practice, it can become part of your daily
routine.

Sometimes a message is unclear because it was not structured effectively. Poor sentence structure and
word usage can wreak havoc on a statement's clarity. For example, classified ads in newspapers
frequently are so condensed that their intended meaning becomes distorted or obscured. For example,
"Room for rent for ladies with wide windows and secured gate." Obviously, the advertisement knew
what they intended to communicate, but their failure to phrase their messages accurately interfered
with conveying the meaning.

When conversing, you can easily clear up misunderstandings caused by scrambled sentences or poor
word choice. You must be aware of listeners reactions to what you are saying. If they appear confused,
you should rephrase the message right away.

Effective speakers do not assume that what is clear to them will necessarily be clear to listeners. They are
especially aware of this potential problem in situations such as public speeches, during which listeners
might not be able to ask questions. To ensure comprehension, speakers should strive to make their
meaning clear by using familiar and concrete words rather than abstract language.

2. Use Vivid Language

To communicate effectively, make your message animated and interesting. Direct, fresh language given
in the active voice can bring a sense of excitement, urgency and forcefulness to what you say. Vividness
tells your audience that they better listen because what you have to say is important.

For example, your organization is trying to raise money for homeless people. You may present statistics
to illustrate the number of people who are believed to be homeless. Next, you may present actual cases
of individuals who are homeless including children and their families. The vividness of the presentation
will get your listeners' attention.
Vivid language is more persuasive, memorable and has an emotional impact. Vivid messages are more
likely to create readily retained and record mental messages. Finally, people tend to listen more
attentively to vivid messages than to uninspiring or uninteresting messages.

Effective communicators use vivid language in all their interactions, whether it's one-on-one with friends
or family, in small groups, or in the public arena. Use interesting words, try to use active verbs, and
provide variety in the length of your sentences. Whenever possible, avoid cliches, and use slang
appropriately, with the appropriate audiences. You are more likely to keep your listeners interested in
what you have to say if you use fresh language to present ideas in new and exciting ways.

3. Use Immediate Language

Verbal immediacy identifies and projects the speaker's feeling and makes the message more relevant to
the listener. Verbal immediacy draws listeners in an involves them in the subject at hand. Take note of
the following statements:

(1) We will have great time in our class reunion.

(2) I think you will enjoy the class reunion.
(3) Many enjoy class reunion.

The first statement is directly related to the speaker, the listener, and the situation. It is assertive, and
the speaker makes a connection with the listeners by using the word we. The other two statements,
decrease the intensity with the listeners and the event. The language becomes less immediate and more
distant in tone.

Verbal immediacy also makes the speaker appear relaxed, confident, competent, and effective. Also,
receivers tend to view messages characterized by immediacy as similar to their own beliefs more readily
than those cast in language unrelated to the speaker, topic, or receiver.

4. Use Appropriate Language

Each time you speak, your listeners have specific expectations about the language you will use. Different
kinds of language are appropriate to different situations. For example, the language you would use in
addressing the president of your college or university would be much more formal than the language
you would use when you are chatting with friends.

Using language that is inappropriate for a given situation damages your credibility, and your message
might be misinterpreted or disregarded. It is therefore, crucial to assess each speaking situation and
adjust your language accordingly. In public situations, profanity, improper grammar, and slang are always
inappropriate.

5. Use Metaphorical Language

The way we look at the world around us is fundamentally metaphorical. Metaphors help us to structure
what we think, how we perceive things, and what we do. Metaphorical language pervades our everyday
language and thoughts. A metaphor relates an object or idea to another. It is a figure of speech which
gives a direct comparison to an object or idea without the use of as or like. A successful metaphor makes
an object or idea clearly and vividly.

Examples of Metaphors:
Life is a roller coaster. You are my sunshine

Chapter 7: Developing Relationships

It is a human tendency to evaluate everything and everyone and to form attitudes about people,
objects, and events in our lives. As we encounter other individuals at school, work, or in our
neighborhoods, we develop attitudes about each of them. These interpersonal evaluation fall along a
dimension ranging from liking to disliking and also help to determine the type of relationship that may
be formed, for example, friend, close acquaintance, superficial acquaintance, annoying or undesirable
acquaintance.

Relationships have the potential to form any time two people make contact with each other, whether
face to face or via some other medium such as the phone or the computer. Most contacts happened
accidentally, depending on factors such as seating arrangement in a class, physical arrangements in a
workplace, in a hospital lobby or in an elevator or even in a public transport. Physical proximity and
timing are very often the reason how people meet and begin relationships with each other.

Forming and Dissolving Relationships

How we progress as individuals, survive, develop intimacy, and make sense of our world depends on how
we relate to others.

Interpersonal Attraction

Most of us develop relationships quite routinely, although the process is easier for some people than it is
for others. Every day, we are enormously influenced by first impressions. Interpersonal attraction is the
desire to interact with someone based on a variety of factors, including physical attractiveness,
personality, proximity or similarities in some aspects.

A person is liked by some people, disliked by some, and seen as indifferent by others. Why? This
question is not easily answered, but, to some extent, differences in attraction depend on the person who
is making the evaluation. Attraction also depends in part on the similarities and differences between the
evaluator and the person being evaluated. As acquaintances evolve from the first encounter to more
engaged relationships, two additional factors come into play:

a. the need to associate with someone

b. reactions to observable physical attributes.

Physical Attributes

When we like or dislike some people at first sight, it is an indication that we have observed something
about them that appears to provide information. For example, if a stranger reminds you of someone you
know and like, your response to the person is extended by association. You tend to like the stranger
simply on the basis of a superficial resemblance to someone else.

Physical attributes are very powerful message and influence many types of interpersonal evaluations,
but appearance is especially crucial with respect to attraction to members of the opposite sex. People
respond positively to those who are very attractive and negatively to those who are unattractively
Physical attractiveness is a very powerful message and influences many types of interpersonal
evaluations. Appearance is especially crucial with respect to attraction to members of the opposite sex.

How does attractiveness affect relationships and interpersonal communication? Many people tend to
reject others who are far less attractive than they believe themselves to be; in other words, they are
saying, "I can do better than that." As a result, people tend to pair off, especially in romantic
relationships, by selecting individuals whom they consider similar in attractiveness.

Mismatches do occur, such as portrayed in the characters of Catherine (an attractive woman) and
Vincent (an unattractive man) in the story Beauty and the Beast. Why do these exceptions occur, and
what explains them? If one person in a relationship is more attractive than another, for example, people
tend to that the less attractive person in the relationship has an attribute that balances the mismatch,
such as wealth, power, intelligence, sex appeal, or fame. For example, in the “beauty and the Beast”,
Vincent’s appearance is unattractive but his kindness, gentleness, and bravery make Catherine's love for
him believable. Whether we wish to accept it or not, physical appearance does play a role in determining
relationships. Although this attractiveness might not always predict the outcome of a relationship,
physical attractiveness is important as an attention getter.

Interacting the First Time

Individuals meet and interact for the first time. The initial interaction might consist of a brief exchange of
words, either electronically or in person, or the eye contact during which two individuals recognize each
other's existence and potential interest to meet and converse. If conversation does not begin, the
initiating stage may end, and the potential relationship might not progress any further. Whether the
interaction continues depends on various assessments that the individuals make for example, whether
the other person is attractive or unattractive, approachable or unapproachable. A connection must be
made to motivate one or both of the individuals to continue the interaction if a relationship is to
develop.

Signs That Show a Relationship Is Over

Before a relationship is over, certain warning signs show. These are the three common signs:

1. Aggressive Behavior. A preliminary warning sign that a relationship is heading toward trouble is when
one of the parties becomes a little too aggressive by aiming hurtful communication at the other party. All
of us, at one time or another, say something that we wished we hadn't said to someone about whom we
care. However, whether intentionally or not, when people communicate hurtful statements to one
another with increasing frequency, it is possible sign that their relationship is in trouble.

2. Lies. Another warning sign that a relationship is in trouble is when one person deceives another by
lying about something. Whether the lie is significant or trivial, it weakens the relationship, which is trust.
Most of the time, acts of deception have consequences that people don't fully consider when justifying
their reason for lying. A relationship built on deceit is not likely to succeed for very long.

3. Betrayal. Another warning sign that a relationship is in trouble is betrayal. Betrayal happen when
someone trusts another person and that trust is can broken. For example, if you tell a friend a personal
secret and especially ask for complete confidentiality and the friend then spreads the story to others,
you have been betrayed.

Relationships that are injured by betrayal are often not repairable because of the amount of hurt that
breaches of trust cause.

Dialectical Theory: Push and Pull

Relationships confront many contradictions or tensions, which push and pull us in many different
directions at the same time. For example, as an individual you may want to be out with your friends for
the evening but you have an important paper due in a few days that you haven't started. Thus, you have
to decide between being with your friends or beginning your paper. Or you might want your best friend
to spend more time with you, but when your friend does, you decide that you want more time to
yourself. This illustrates the contradictory impulses or dialectic that push and pull us in conflicting
directions with others. By contradicting impulses, we mean that each person is having two opposing and
interacting desires, which push and pull the relationships in different directions.

Relationships require both the desire to connect to another person and the desire to retain autonomy as
an individual. We want to connect to others, such as partners, friends, parents, siblings, or co-workers,
but we also want to retain some control and independence or autonomy over our lives.

Intimacy at its highest level does require a bonding that connects us with another person emotionally,
intellectually, and physically, but it does not mean or require a complete loss of self. In healthy
relationships, there is a reasonable balance of being connected and maintaining autonomy. Relationships
that move too far in one direction or the other in terms of control versus autonomy are usually
relationships that are extremely unstable and potentially destructive.

Interpersonal Conflict
Conflict, according to communication scholars William Wilmot and Joyce Hocker," is an expressed
struggle between at least two interdependent parties who perceive incompatible goals, scarce
resources, and interference from others in achieving their goals. For example, suppose you want to go to
a concert on a Friday evening and your friend wants to go to a movie. Both of you explain your desire
about what you would like to do (expressed struggle), neither of you wants to go out alone on a Friday
evening (interdependent parties), you cannot go to both the movie and the concert in the evening
(incompatible goals), neither of you can afford to do both because of time and money (scarce resources),
and your friend will not consider going to the concert (interference). You have incompatible goals, and it
seems one person must lose for the other to win.

What Causes Conflict?

There are several factors that cause conflict. One is faulty communication, a social factor that can lead to
conflict. This is evident by the fact that individuals communicate in ways that anger or annoy others even
though it might not be the communicator's intention to do so. Have you ever been harshly criticized in a
way that you believed was unjustified, insensitive, unfair, and not the least bit helpful? If you have, you
know that this type of perceived criticism leaves you feeling upset, angry, and ready to attack, thus
setting the stage for conflict.

Another cause of conflict is faulty perceptions and our tendency to perceive our own views as objective
and reflecting reality but to perceive others' views as biased or lacking in reality. As a result, stereotyping
or prejudices create conflicting views by magnifying differences between our views and those of others,
especially others whom we believe are different from us. Differences may be magnified for many of us
when we confront cultures different from our own.

There are other causes of conflict such as: long standing grudges or resentment, the desire for revenge,
differences in attitudes or character.

Can Conflict Be Destructive?

Yes. Conflict can be destructive if the following are present:

(a) When the resolution of the conflict ends with a winner or a loser

(b) When the individuals involved act too aggressively, when they withdraw

from each other, when they withhold their feelings from each other, or when

they accuse each other of causing their problems

(c) When it prevents us from doing our work or feeling good about ourselves
(d) When it forces us to do things that we do not want to do

(e) When the outcome is more important than the relationship

Of course not all relationship breakups are the result of conflict, nor are all relationship breakups
necessarily are destructive or harmful. However, when conflict results in the termination of relationships
and leaves one or both of the parties feeling foolish, inadequate, or angry, then it is usually destructive.

When Is Conflict Beneficial?

Sometimes conflict can be good and sometimes bad. When is it appropriate to engage in conflict? It is
okay to have conflicts over ideas, but to attract someone personally for his or her ideas is not okay.
Here are some benefits of conflict:

(a) It can bring out problems that need to be solved.

(b) It can bring people together to clarify their goals and to look for new ways to

do things.

(c) It can eliminate resentments and help people to understand each other.

(d) It can bring creativity in solving differences.

(e) It can produce acceptable solutions that allow people to live more in harmony with each other.

(f) It can help people pay attention to other points of view.

(g) It can bring new life into a relationship and strengthen it.

Constructive conflict can be frustrating and difficult as well as contentious, and it requires competent
communicators who are knowledgeable, skillful, sensitive, committed and ethical in resolving
differences.

Repairing relationships requires cooperation and mutual agreement; both parties must want to keep the
relationship together in order to solve their differences. It also requires effective interpersonal
communication.

Relationships are often messy, and even the most stable seem to go through various pushes and pulls,
which can create tensions between partners. Conflict is inevitable in all relationships. It is caused by
social factors which includes faulty communication.
To help repair and possibly save relationships, competent communicators know how to use strategies
and effective interpersonal communication. In a positive and supportive environment, communication
between individuals usually reflects caring, openness, flexibility, warmth, animation, and receptivity. The
best way to develop and maintain relationships is to invite more communication.

Chapter 5: Connecting Listening and Thinking in the

Communication Process
Listening is defined as the active process of receiving, constructing meaning from, and responding to
spoken or nonverbal messages. Listening, just like reading, writing, and speaking, is an art. Just like the
other forms of art, it requires practice and techniques, but this is an art which is taken for granted.

The ability to understand and respond between the speaker and the receiver depends on how both of
them heard and interpreted the message. Communication fails if the receiver also fails to understand the
message being conveyed. Listening is not simply hearing. Listening involves intellectual and emotional
response.

Since communication is a process, listening is an integral part of this process. As a student, you have
been exposed to listen to teachers talking for several hours. And as a student, have you experienced
getting low grades because you did not understand the instructions given by the teacher? Has your
teacher called your attention because you were not paying attention? All of these failures are caused by
poor listening. Listening requires attention not just hearing sounds without understanding the message.

The Importance of Effective Listening

As students, you get better grades because you understand the lecture more than those who are
inattentive. For working professionals, they can perform their job better since they understand the
instructions well and this saves time, effort, and cost since they don't have to redo the work given to
them.

Most misunderstandings that arise in our daily lives occur because of poor listening habits. Poor listening
skills can create serious personal, professional, and financial problems. Students with poor listening can
result in misunderstood information, and directions, incorrect or incomplete assignments, hence, result
to lower grades.
From the time we get up in the morning, until the end of the day, we are constantly listening to
something. Yet most of us give little thought to the role that listening plays in our everyday experiences.
There is little doubt that communicating, and in particular listening, plays a significant role in society.
Because we spend so much time as consumers of communication, we need to learn às much as we can
about effective listening. In the global community in which we live and work, listening carefully to the
messages conveyed by people of other cultures and backgrounds is a skill required to succeed in many
areas of life.

Skills in listening, analyzing, processing, and recording information are often neglected during formal
education. How many have ever had any formal training in listening? Students have completed course
work in reading, writing, and speaking but few students have ever enrolled in a listening course. Not only
are there few opportunities for formal listening instruction, but informal listening training is not
generally provided either.

To communicate effectively, listening and speaking should work hand in hand. In order to understand the
important role of listening, the different types of listening must be considered:
1. Listening for information

Listening for information requires listeners to get facts, knowledge, ideas and opinions from others. This
is usually common in lectures, symposia, conferences, fora, meetings and panel discussions in the
academic community.

This type of listening requires you to give extra effort to pay attention to the topic especially the details
given by the speaker. You should set aside any bias or prejudice against the speaker or the topic;
otherwise this will hinder your privilege to listen to new ideas being shared. Give your individual
attention to the speaker and you can jot down notes to help you focus on the ideas being presented.

2. Critical listening

Critical listening involves assessing the ideas of the speaker. Listeners try to evaluate the ideas presented
by the speaker.

This type of listening requires you to listen to the speaker's idea and find out what the speaker's motives
are. Good examples of this type is a speech delivered by politicians, union leaders, sales people, and
others. This also requires your ability to relate the speaker's ideas to your own or ideas you previously
heard or learned. Critical listening eventually requires your decision. Prior to making this decision, you
have to make sure that you have fully weighed all the ideas presented.
3. Listening for enjoyment- This is the type of listening which appeals to listeners. Listeners enjoy the
topics being delivered since they are not obligated to assess, evaluate, consider or to make decision.

Example of this type is listening to talk shows (especially interviewing of actors and actresses), listening
to oratorical contest, poetry reading, and other stage performance.

4. Reflective listening- requires intimate listening since the speaker's topic challenges the listener's
values, beliefs, and practices. This type of listening is done by priests, ministers, and other religious
persons, guidance, or marriage counselors, and others.

This type requires the listeners to question reassessing, reevaluating, reconfirming their own values,
beliefs, and practices. You, as the listener, is required to do two things while you are listening. One is to
recall previous ideas and second to consider in your mind what has been said.

Speakers are beset with the problem of how to get the attention of the listeners up to the end of the
presentation. This is beyond the speaker's control. As listeners, you also have an obligation to participate
and this participation simply calls for your undivided attention while the speaker is delivering an idea.

Before listening to a lecture or a speech, there are different situations you should consider:
1. Set a positive attitude. Even before the speaker of lecturer starts to deliver his/her topic, start telling
yourself that you are to learn something from the delivery.
2. Avoid pre-judging the lecturer or speaker based on personal appearance or past experience. Pre-
judging a lecturer or speaker clouds your purpose to listen. Remember "Do not judge a book by its
cover."
3. Listen attentively to the content not to the errors committed by the speaker.
4. Be an active listener. You may want to participate by mentally processing the ideas that you hear.
Mental processing allows you to absorb or to reject the information.
5. List down important points you wish to clarify. Very often an open forum follows a lecturer or a
speaker. This is where you ask questions or clarify points unclear to you. With this in mind, you can avoid
unkind nonverbal communication such as shaking your head, smirking or pouting.

There is one important thing you have to remember when you listen to lecture or speech. You, too, will
be in the shoes of the speaker one time or another. Remember the old adage - "Don't do unto others as
you don't want others do unto you."

Listening and Hearing, Is There a Difference?

Most of us take listening for granted, we tend to think of it as a simple task. Listening is a process that is
closely linked to the thinking process. Listening is close link with reasoning, comprehension and memory.

What is the major difference between hearing and listening? Hearing is passive. If you have normal
hearing, your ears receive sounds. You don't have to work at hearing; it just happens. People can have
excellent hearing but a terrible listeners. Listening, on the other hand, is active and requires energy and
action. Listening is the process of receiving, constructing meaning from, and responding to spoken or
nonverbal messages.
The Stages of Effective Listening
Listening is a highly complex behavior. Many people have tried to determine what happens when people
listen. What is involved? What happens from the time someone makes sounds to the point where you
make meaning from those words and the accompanying nonverbals? Six stages for effective listening:
1. Hearing- is the passive physiological process in which sound is received by the ear. Example of this is
listening to music. When you play music, while you study, do you hear the music or do you listen to it?
The sounds provide background that you hear; your hearing becomes listening only when you also carry
out the remaining stages of the listening process.
2. Understanding- might also be labeled comprehension and simply means that you assign meaning to
the stimuli that you hear or otherwise perceive. Understanding involves the processing of information.
The ability to accurately follow directions is one of the ways in which you can measure whether or not
you understand what you hear.

Students are often in situations in which understanding is critical. Another difference between hearing
and listening is understanding. Although there is no commonly accepted explanation of how
understanding occurs, we know that past experience plays an important role and that you relate and
compare new sounds and ideas to those you have previously heard. To learn statistics, for example, you
must first learn algebra and other mathematical principles. However, if you are unprepared when you
walk into your statistics class, you can attend to what the teacher is saying, but because you are unable
to interpret the professor's message, you will not understand the material presented. The inability to
understand reduces your listening effectiveness.

3. Remembering
As a student, you are aware of the importance of remembering, or recalling something from stored
memory. Most of your professors expect you to recall and apply what you have heard in lectures,
discuss, assignments, and activities. As you may have noticed, you tend to remember only information
that supports your own view. Other information is forgotten. Remembering helps you complete class
assignments. Memory will also be very importar.t in your work responsibilities when an employer
expects you to acquire and apply knowledge.

4. Interpreting
In the interpreting stage, the listener simply tries to make sense of the information received. This is the
stage when the specific situation and nonverbal aspects of communication come into play. An effective
listener knows that facial expressions, posture, eye contact, silence and even paralanguage affect
messages. Good listeners will work to develop greater sensitivity to these dimensions of communication.

5. Evaluating

In the evaluating stage, the listener analyzes evidence, sorts facts from speaker, judges the accuracy of
speaker's statements and conclusions, and judges the accuracy of personal conclusions. Once you begin
to assess the message you received and conclusions, yonight longer hear and attend to other incoming
messages,
6. Responding: Sending Feedback
Responding is the listener's overt behavior that indicates to speaker what has and has not been
received. Examples of such behaviors are total silence (didn't hear the message, ignored the message, or
was angry about what the message said), smiling or frowning (agreeing or disagreeing with the
message), and asking for clarification of what was received.

Giving feedback is an important part of being an effective listener. Feedback is the response to a
message that a receiver sends back to a source. Feedback helps to ensure understanding and also helps
speakers determine whether they have been successful in communicating. Feedback should be
appropriate to the situation, deliberate, thoughtful, and clear. When it is important that you grasp every
detail of a message, you should paraphrase or repeat the information for the sender to verify your
reception, understanding, and recall of it. This also indicates to the sender that you are actively listening
and are committed to receiving the intended message.

Students provide their professors with feedback, both consciously and unconsciously. Some students,
however, might not always be completely honest in their responses. For example, even though they
might indicate through verbal and nonverbal cues that they are listening to, understanding and agreeing
with everything being said - even if the communication has made little sense to them. This behavior,
unfortunately, unclear messages and further confusion. When those who are confused can lead to more
admit their confusion, their instructors are more likely to improve their presentations. Active listeners
always try to get the most out of the message by making sure that they have received it accurately and
completely.

Listening is more than merely paying attention. Listening is an active, complex process. The six
interdependent stages are necessary for effective listening. As competent listeners, you need to reflect
on what works best for you, both as listener and learners.

Barriers to Effective Listening

Why are most people poor listeners? The answer to this question is surprisingly complex. The quality of
our listening changes from time to time and from situation to situation. A number of barriers contribute
to our ineffectiveness as listeners. Some of the barriers that reduce our listening effectiveness are under
our control whereas others are not. There are six barriers to effective listening as identified by Ralph
Nichols, who is considered the "father of listening research." Although these six barriers may not be the
only ones, they are the most common.

1. Considering the Topic or Speaker Uninteresting

The level of interest and the amount of importance we place on a subject or a speaker usually govern
how much effort we put into listening. Deciding that a subject or person is uninteresting or boring often
leads us to the conclusion that the information being presented is not important. However, this is not
necessarily true. What appears to be dull or insignificant might very well be vital for passing an exam,
doing an assignment correctly, learning something supervisor's instructions, making a sale or learning a
new way of doing something on the job. In other words, a competent listener keeps an open mind.
2. Criticizing the Speaker Instead of the Message

How many times have you judged a speech by the number of "ahs" and "ums" the speaker used? How
many times has a speaker's volume, mispronunciations, or accent influenced your opinion? Have you
ever missed a message because you were focusing on a mismatched shirt and tie, bizarre earrings, or the
speaker's facial expressions or nervous behavior.

Of course, when possible, speakers should do everything in their power to eliminate personal quirks that
may distract attention from their message, but listeners must also share responsibility for receiving the
message. An effective listener must be able to overlook the superficial elements of a person's delivery
style or appearance to concentrate on the substance of the presentation. In short, the listener must stay
involved in the message, not the speaker or the speaker's attire or behavior.

3. Concentrating on Details, Not Main Ideas

Many of us listen for specific facts such as dates, names, figures, definitions, locations, assuming that
they are the important things to know. But are they? Specific facts are needed in some situations, but we
often focus too much on details. As a result, we walk away with disjointed details and no idea how they
relate to each other and to the total picture.

Competent listeners focus on the main or most important ideas, not on every single word. All stages of
the listening process are affected adversely when you forget that general ideas can be more significant
than the details that surround them. Listen carefully to your professor or your supervisor for clues to
what is most important and note when they ask you to carefully select what to write in your notes, or
include in your work tasks.

4. Avoiding Difficult Listening Situations

Concentration and energy are needed to overcome the temptation to ignore or avoid what might seem
difficult and confusing. When you are faced with difficult listening situation, the best approach is usually
to ask questions.

Sometimes, you might not listen to new and difficult information because you lack motivation, but once
again, the responsibility falls on you to make the effort to listen. Try consciously and continually to listen
to such communication. Each time you are successful at staying tuned in, you will acquire not only some
information, but also improved confidence and ability,

5. Tolerating or Failing to Adjust to Distractions

Distractions constantly disrupt your concentration. As listeners, you the responsibility to adjust to,
compensate for, or eliminate distractions and to focus on speakers and their messages.
You can control some distractions. If noise from another room competes with a speaker, for example, the
listener can close the door, ask the person who is creating the noise to be quiet, move closer to the
speaker, or ask the speaker to talk louder.

Some distractions must be overcome through mental rather than physical effort. A noise in the
background can become a major distraction, or you can reduce it to a minor nuisance by forcing yourself
to listen more intently to the speaker. When distractions occur, you must consciously focus on selecting
the appropriate messages and attending to them. You must take advantage of your ability to filter out
extraneous noise and distractions and concentrate on the sounds that are important to us. If you cannot
modify external noise, you must alter your internal listening behavior in order to understand the
speaker's message

6. Faking Attention
At one time or another, everyone pretends to pay attention to something or someone. You appear to
listen intently, but your mind is somewhere else. You might even smile in agreement when all you are
really doing is maintaining eye contact. In class, you might pretend to take notes, although your mind
might not be following what is being said.

Pretending to pay attention can become a habit. Without even realizing what you are doing, you might
automatically tune out a speaker and let your mind wander. If after a speech, you cannot recall the main
purpose or the essential points presented by the speaker, you were probably faking attention. Although
it might seem harmless, such deceptive behavior can lead to misunderstanding and cause people to
question your credibility and

Competent listeners need to ask themselves, "Am I really paying attention?" When listeners realize they
are distracted, they should make an effort to pay attention. Good listeners recognize when they are not
listening well and do whatever it takes to return their attention to the speaker. While listeners may think,
"What's in it for me?" when someone is sharing something that seems irrelevant to them, if they make
use of their critical thinking and critical listening skills, listeners will try to determine how it may be
helpful at some point, even it it's not right now. Competent listeners demonstrate attitudes, behaviors,
and thinking that allow them to focus on others. They know that listening is an active process that
requires energy and effort.

Technology and Intercultural Listening

Technology can be used to students' advantage, if it is used as a tool. Taking notes helps students to
become better listeners, and appropriate technology as a delivery tool can also serve the same function.
An increasing use of computer- enhanced presentations (such as PowerPoint) and an expanding students
ability to take better notes help students perform better on exams when technology and note-taking
instruction are provided early and reinforced throughout the semester. Listeners must listen with their
eves, their minds, their bodies, their hearts and their ears. Students need to listen to determine where
the instructor's emphases are and take notes accordingly.

Research in intercultural listening is fairly new, so there is not a great deal of information available. In
some cultures, people value listening. In Eastern cultures, children are taught to listen to others in a
respectful way. Much of the teaching is done through examples and specific statements of expectations
to be courteous and to attend to what others are saying. Students in Asia and in Mexico are taught to
listen first and ask questions later. The Chinese symbol for the term to listen is made up of symbols for
eyes, ears, and heart and corresponds with the Chinese view that people must listen with their entire
beings: their eyes, their ears, and most especially their hearts. The Chinese believe that listening is
important and that when one listens, nothing else should occur because listening should take one's
entire attention and energy. In places such as Hongkong, China, Taiwan, Japan, Mexico, and Valenzuela, if
you interrupt, the person will be branded as discourteous, and the local residents will avoid speaking
with you. The best advice for communicating with people from other cultures is to:

(1) respectfully ask questions and

(2) be aware of cultural differences.

Listening requires energy and commitment with whomever we communicate.

Students spend a great deal of time listening and the function of that listening is often to gain
information for future use. They also need to learn and apply thinking skills to evaluate the messages
they receive.

As students then, you must work at listening. You can learn to be a better listener, overcome bad
listening habits, and develop effective attitudes, behavior and mind-sets. The benefits might well be that
you take better notes, follow assignments better, get higher grades, perform more effectively on the job,
and receive pay raises and promotions because you took the time to learn effective listening behaviors.

Chapter 8 :Group and Team Communication

"Teamwork is the ability to work together toward a common vision. The ability to direct individual
accomplishments toward organizational objectives. It is the fuel that allows common people to attain
uncommon results." -Andrew Carnegie

Group- not simply a collection of people gathered in the same place. It is a collection of individuals who
influence one another, have a common purpose, take on roles, are independent, and interact together.
A true group show the following characteristics:
(1) Members interact with one another often,
(2) The group is important to its members,
(3) Members have common goals and outcomes, and
(4) The members are similar to one another in important ways.

Small-Group Communication: Making the Connection

Effective communication- is one of the major factors that influence whether a group experience is
successful and satisfying
Small-group communication- differs from other types of communication in that it requires a variety of
communication skills and must include at least three interacting people. By contrast, interviewing and
interpersonal communication usually involve only two people interacting, whereas public speaking
involves one person speaking and many listeners. However, interviewing, interpersonal communication
and presentational skills are necessary for effective group communication to occur, whatever is the size
of the group. For example, the ability to ask effective questions, to listen, deal with interpersonal
relationships, resolve conflicts, and present one's ideas are important in communicating with groups. In
addition, constructive group communication requires that the group members respect one another,
speak clearly, provide credible information, support each other, foster a positive climate, challenge each
other's ideas, persuade each other, and hold high ethical standards,

Small group communication involves the exchange of information among relatively small number of
people, ideally five to seven, who share a common purpose, such as solving a problem, making a
decision, or sharing information. Effective group communication requires a communication style that is
honest, flexible, assertive, enthusiastic, and tolerant of others. Effective group members recognize the
importance of all group members' input and want to ensure that everyone has an opportunity to
participate. They are not only willing to listen to others, but also are willing to discuss ideas and issues
whether they agree or disagree with them.

A group is not simply a collection of people gathered in the same place. To qualify as a group, the people
must be related in six ways:

1. Perceptions: Do the members make an impression on one another?

2. Motivation: Are there rewards for being together?
3. Goals: Do the members have a common
4. Organization: Does each person have some role or task?
5. Interdependence: Must each person depend on the others fo efforts to be successful?
6. Interaction: Is the number of persons enough so that each communicate with every person?

A true group show the following characteristics:

1. Members interact with one another often,

2. The group is important to its members,
3. Members share common goals and outcomes, and
4. The members are similar to one another in important ways.

Group Formation: Why Join a Group

There are different types of groups where people want to belong: organizations, clubs, religious groups,
social groups, work groups, informal groups of friends, and many more. Why did you join them in the
first place? There are several reasons why people join groups and your reasons are probably similar to
those that motivate others to join groups. There are at least five reasons why people join a group or
groups:
1. Groups help to satisfy important psychological and social needs, such as need for attention and
affection or the need to belong. Imagine what it would be like to absolutely alone, in total isolation from
others.
2. Group membership helps people achieve goals that otherwise might be accomplished. Groups make it
easier to perform certain tasks, solve difficult problems, and make complex decisions that might
overwhelm one individual.
3. Group membership can provide multiple sources of information and knowledge that might not be
available to one individual.
4. Groups can help to meet the need for security. The old saying that there is safety in numbers rings
true in many situations; belonging to groups can provide protection and security against common
enemies. For example, people join neighborhood watch groups to protect themselves from criminal
activity.
5. Group membership can also contribute to an individual's positive social identity. It becomes part of a
person's self-concept. The more prestigious and restrictive the groups to which the person is admitted,
the more the self- concept is bolstered.

If the advantages in joining groups, there are also disadvantages. These disadvantages are:
1. Group membership can restrict personal freedom. Member of various groups may be expected to
behave in specific ways. For example, the group rules should be followed and members should comply
with requirements of their group roles. If members don't comply, the group may impose sanctions on
them or expel them.
2. Groups demand on members' time, energy, and resources, and if he members do not meet the
demands, they may be required to surrender their membership.
3. Groups sometimes adopt positions or policies of which some members disapprove. This may force
dissenting members to remain silent, speak out and run the risks of strong sanctions, or withdraw.
4. Groups are sometimes perceived as ineffective and time consuming. They require much work yet
accomplish little.

Group membership is not always beneficial; there are some real downsides hidden among the benefits,
and members often consider these carefully as they weigh the cost of group membership against its
benefits.

Types of Groups

There are two major types of groups: the primary and the secondary. Each serves different human
needs, but characteristics of each are found in almost every group in which one participates.

1. Primary Groups- focus on social or interpersonal relationships among members and exist primarily to
satisfy what are labeled primary needs such as the need for inclusion (belonging), and affection (esteem,
likeability, love). Primary groups are usually long-term and include family, friends roommates, co-workers
sharing time off together, and other groups of friends who might share vacations, party, and so on. The
groups might at times make decisions, solve problems, or take on particular task, but their main purpose
is to socialize, support one another, chat about a variety of topics, let off steam, and enjoy each other's
company.
2. Secondary Groups- exist to accomplish tasks or achieve goals. They are formed for the purpose of
doing work such as class assignment, solving a problem, or making a decision. The main reason for
secondary groups is to get something done, but they can also help members achieve their primary needs
for socialization and affection.

There are several kinds of secondary groups to which one person may wish to belong:
●Problem-Solving Groups- exists to overcome some unsatisfactory situation or obstacles in achieving a
goal. Many, if not most, groups in business and industry are problem solving groups. The most common
problem that any organization faces is finding a way to make more money.
●Decision-Making Groups- the task of a decision-making group is to make a choice from among several
alternatives. The group must identify what the possible choices are, discuss the consequences of the
choices, and then select the alternative that best meets a need or achieves the goal of the group or
parent organization. A committee that screens applicants for a job has the task of making a decision. The
group must select one person from among the many who apply.
●Study Groups-Students are familiar with study groups. The main goal of these groups is to gather
information and learn new ideas. The advantage of participating in a group is that students learn by
being involved in a discussion. A study. group also has the advantage of having access to more
information and wider variety of ideas through the contribution of different individuals.
●Therapy Groups- also called an encounter group, support group, or T-group. It helps group members
work on personal problems or provided encouragement and support to help manage stress. Such groups
are led by professionals who are trained to help members gain as they communicate with one another.
Members also learn how they are perceived by others. By participating in a therapy group, people with
similar problems can benefit by learning how others have learned to cope. By experiencing therapy with
others, members take advantage of the greater knowledge and information available to the group.
●Committees- a group of people who are elected or appointed for a specific task. Some committees are
formed to solve problems. Others are appointed to make a decision or simply to gather information so
that another group, or team, or committee can make a decision.
-may either be a standing committee (one that remains active for an extended period of time) or
an ad hoc committee (one that disband when its special task has been completed).
●Quality Circles- a group of three to fifteen employees who meet regularly to examine work processes
with the goal of improving productivity, morale, and overall work quality. Employees trained to work in a
quality circles receive basic information about the group communication principles and practices such as
how to reach agreement, make decisions, solve problems, and develop a cohesive work team.
●Focus Groups- a small group of people who are asked to focus on a particular topic or issue so that
others can better understand the group's res to the topic or issue presented. One person usually serves
as a moderator, and this person asks open-ended questions and then simply listens to the responses of
the group members. Many advertising agencies show new advertising campaigns to focus groups and
then listen to the response of the group members to assess the impact or effectiveness of the campaign.

The Essence of Communication Competence

There are three elements involved in becoming a truly competent communicator.
1. Motivation- an internal drive to achieve a goal. To be motivated means you have a strong desire to do
your best, even during inevitable periods of fatigue and frustrations. If you are motivated to become a
competent small group communicator, you probably have an understanding of the benefits of
advantages of working with others in groups.
2. Knowledge- the information you need to competently do what needs to be done. You should have the
knowledge that can help others to become more competent communicator in groups, on teams, and
during the meetings you will undoubtedly attend in the future.
3. Skill- an effective behavior that can be repeated when it is appropriate. Just having the desire to be
effective (motivation) or being able to rattle off lists of principles and theories (knowledge) doesn't
ensure that you will be competent. You have to have the skill to put principles into practice.

Important Points to Remember in Groups or Teams

Groups and teams are integral parts of any society. Consider the following suggestions:
Some Essential Principles
1. Work in small groups to benefit from the knowledge and information of others.
2. Work in small groups to take advantage of other members' creative approaches to problem solving
and decision making.
3. Learn to recognize the key elements that make a group or team effective: a clear, elevating goal,
results-driven structure, competent team members, unified commitment, a collaborative climate,
standards of excellence, external support recognition, and principled leadership.
4. Cultivate those characteristics of individual team members that enhance team effectiveness,
experience, problem-solving ability, openness, supportiveness, action-oriented approach, and positive
personal style.
5. Form a discussion group and talk a topic with others when you want to improve your understanding of
a subject or issue.
6. Work in small groups so that you can participate in making decisions that affect you. You will be more
likely to support a decision if you have contributed to the discussion.
7. Try to learn something new about yourself when you work with others in small groups.
8. Do not let others pressure you to conform to the groups' majority opinion just for the sake of
agreement.
9. Do not let one or two members of a small group dominate the discussion. If they do, you lose many of
the advantages of working in a group.
10. Avoid the traps of relying too much on other group members. Assume your fair share of the
responsibility for getting things done.
11. Avoid frustration by accepting the fact that groups take more time to accomplish task than to
individuals.

Virtual Small Group Communication

Virtual small group communication (electronically mediated communication)- is communication among

group members who are not together in the same physical location.
- communicating by a phone line, wireless signal, satellite signal, or other
technology.

Electronic technology makes it possible for you to use virtual aids of communication under four
conditions:
1. same time, same place
2. same time, different place
3. different time, same place
4. different time, different place

Different Types of Technology that Make Virtual Communication Possible

1. Telephone Conferences call-one of the first uses of technology to support group and team meetings
-involves a group of people agreeing to meet at a certain time by phone.
-To hold a conference call you need a special telephone service, so that several
people in different locations can be connected at the same time.

One of the obvious disadvantages of telephone conferencing is that you miss many nonverbal cues. Yes,
you still can detect emotions from vocal cues, but without being able to see facial expressions, postures,
and gesture, it's possible that you may not accurately understand the meaning of messages.

2. Electronic Mail (E-Mail)- Communicating via e-mail is one of the most prevalent technological
methods used to send and receive messages in organizations.

E-mail users can participate in what is called synchronous communication - communication interaction
that is taking place in real time. This is what happens when you talk to someone on the telephone-you
talk and another person responds immediately to what you've said. A real time e-mail conversation is
clearly not as immediate as a face-to-face discussion. Even instant messages are not as immediate as
live-and-in person interaction.

3. Asynchronous communication is an interaction in which e-mail correspondents reply to messages

after a time delay. The advantage of asynchronous communication is that you do not have to be logged
on at the same time as your communication partners. You can post a message and then check back later
to see how others have responded, like sending a memo to someone and then waiting for a response.
You lose the immediate feedback, and it takes more time to get work

accomplished because you don't get instant responses from others. The video conference - a relatively
media-rich use of technology - occurs when two or more individuals are linked by the Internet or by
closed-circuit or satellite-linked TV. With the advent of mini-cameras, the Internet, and affordable

4. Video Conferences- a relatively media-rich use of technology

- occurs when two or more individuals are linked by the Internet or by closed-
circuit or satellite-linked TV. With the advent of mini-cameras, the Internet, and
affordable software, has become increasingly easy for groups to hold video conference
meetings. The video conference has the advantage of permitting people to interact over
long distances when it may be very expensive to have all members travel to one
destination. The video conference has an advantage over the conference phone call
because nonverbal behaviors such as facial expressions, eye contact, and posture which
allow the transmission of relational messages can be seen.
Technology is playing a larger role in group interactions. More and more businesses because of travel
expenses and convenience are using methods such as telephone conferencing, video conferencing and
allow groups of employees to discuss problems and issues to make decisions.