Contents Legal Disclaimer

Lewd Dungeon Adventures and its creators will not be

Introduction..............................................................3 held legally liable for any injuries incurred by players for
performing actions suggested in this book or any other Lewd
Scenario 1: Foreverwood Forest.................................4 Dungeon Adventures books. By choosing to participate in
Area 1: Rare Seedling...........................................................5 the activities in this book, you acknowledge that you have a
Area 2: Ancient Guardian....................................................6 good understanding of your physical limitations and proper
Area 3: Corrupted Twig Ent.................................................7 safety precautions.
Area 4: Lost Traveler............................................................8
Area 5: The Moonwell.........................................................9
Area 6: Lone Twig Ent.........................................................11 Credits
Area 7: Raging River...........................................................11 Author: Phoenix Grey
Area 8: Idol of Foreverwood...............................................12 Illustrators: Bad Moon Art Studio, Map
Area 9: Water-Based Lube Monster..................................13 Studio, and We Ren
Map Design: Synced
Area 10: The Ruins’ Threshold...........................................13
Logo Design: Legend_Designers
Scenario 2: Ruins of Evershade...................................14 Template Design: Nathanaël Roux
Area 1: Entrance Puzzle......................................................14
Text copyright 2024 by Ovid Games LLC.
Area 2: Trial of Strength.....................................................16
Area 3: Trial of Wisdom.....................................................17 All rights reserved.
Area 4: Trial of Courage.....................................................23
Area 5: The Fusion Chamber.............................................25 No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in
a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any
End of Adventure Results..........................................27 means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or
otherwise, without written permission of the author.
Acts for Hero Deaths................................................29

Spells in This Adventure............................................30 Not for resale. Permission granted to print or photocopy this
document for personal use only.

2
Introduction In the present day, the ruins of Evershade have become
nothing more than a legend whispered among scholars and

W
elcome to Lewd Dungeon Adventures, treasure hunters. Hidden within the Foreverwood Forest, the
an adult role-playing game filled with city waits, its powerful magic dormant but not extinguished.
fantasy and fun. Before you go any further, Rumors have emerged of a mad sorceress who has taken up
you should know that this book is meant residence within the ruins, seeking to harness the power of
for the Deity’s eyes only. Reading it as a the Ultimate Dildo 9000 and twist it for nefarious purposes.
Hero will ruin the game for you. In the At the start of this adventure, the Hero is approached by
following pages, Deities will find details on how to run the a cloaked figure who reveals themselves to be a scholar of
scenarios in this campaign. sexual arcane history. They have spent their life researching
Evershade and have finally discovered its location. However,
Preparing for Gameplay they need a Cummancer to navigate the forest, overcome the
city’s defenses, and retrieve the pieces of the Ultimate Dildo
Heroes need only come with a character sheet, a willingness
9000 before it falls into the mad sorceress’ hands.
to learn, and a great imagination. It is recommended that the
Read the boxed text below to the Hero:
Deity read through the campaign before gameplay to know
what is coming and how to plan for it.
The following campaign book contains 5 mini-adventures. As you sit at a sturdy oak table in the bustling heart of the
This campaign was designed to be played in 5 sessions, but Gelded Griffin Inn, a hooded figure approaches, the murmur
an ambitious Hero and Deity may power through as many of of the lively patrons dimming as if the air itself respects their
the adventures as they’d like. presence. With a voice smooth yet carrying the weight of
untold secrets, the figure addresses you.
If this is the first time your Hero has played Lewd
Dungeon Adventures, explain that you are a Deity of sexual “Esteemed Hero, I seek one with courage to travel to
energy that has blessed them with your favor. Because of Evershade, the lost city of sexual arcane wonders. It is said
your partnership, they have been bestowed with special sex that within its ruins lies an artifact of formidable power—the
magic that will cause them to be sought out across the land Ultimate Dildo 9000—broken into three pieces during a
to complete quests that can only be undertaken by one with calamity that blotted the city from the maps of the world.”
their skills and knowledge. With your blessing, they are now The figure pauses, pulling back their hood slightly.”Rumors
known as a Cummancer. tell of a mad sorceress who now seeks to claim its power and
twist it into something nefarious. I ask you to journey through
the treacherous Foreverwood Forest, navigate the city’s
Required Props forsaken magic, and retrieve the broken pieces before they
This campaign requires the following props for the fall into the wrong hands. Will you rise to the occasion?”
DRINK version:
“Decide swiftly, for time, like the sands of an hourglass, slips
quietly by, and with each passing moment, the sorceress’
• Tokens (this could be pocket change, poker chips, or any power grows. If you can complete this task, you will have your
identical game pieces) choice of several great rewards.”

This campaign requires the following props for the

XXX version: The hooded figure is known as Thalion Whispwood, a
dark elf with a complexion that seems to glow faintly with
• A cock ring, if the Hero is male, or a nipple erector set, if the soft light of the stars. His eyes are a piercing silver hue,
the Hero is female. reminiscent of moonbeams, and his hair cascades like a
• A ball gag waterfall of pure midnight silk, restrained only by a simple
• A blindfold silver circlet that rests upon his brow. Thalion carries himself
• Something to bind the hands with elegance and poise, yet there is a certain weariness
• A glass dildo in his gaze, suggesting a life dedicated to the pursuit of
knowledge and the burdens such a quest entails.
His robes are of deep forest green, embroidered with
Campaign Overview arcane symbols and threaded with silver. Around his neck
The mystical city of Evershade was once the pinnacle of hangs an amulet with a stone that pulses with a gentle inner
arcane knowledge and magical prowess, a place where the light—a token of his academic achievements. Despite his
greatest mages gathered to weave spells of immense sexual refined appearance, there’s a practicality to his attire; his
power. Centuries ago, a cataclysmic event caused by the boots are scuffed from travel, and his belt is adorned with
creation of a powerful artifact, the Ultimate Dildo 9000, led pouches containing scrolls, herbs, and various instruments
to the city’s downfall. The artifact, a glass dildo that magically necessary for his research.
reshapes to fit the user’s preferred orifice for ultimate Thalion is soft-spoken yet commands attention. His
pleasure, was fractured into three pieces during the disaster. demeanour is calm and collected, but when he talks of
The devastation was so great that it caused the city to fall the Ultimate Dildo 9000, a flicker of urgency betrays his
into ruin and become lost to the outside world. impassive exterior—a sign that the quest he proposes is one
of great personal significance.

3
 If asked what the Ultimate Dildo 9000 is, Thalion can
explain. Should the Hero ask why he wants it, he will
Scenario 1: Foreverwood
murmur under his breath that it’s for personal reasons. No
amount of prodding will get him to reveal anything more.
Forest
Thalion cannot be seduced at this time, as he is impotent The Hero must first journey through the perilous
and hoping that the power of the Ultimate Dildo 9000 will be Foreverwood Forest, facing its natural dangers and the
able to change that if he can harness its magic. creatures that dwell within. Use the map above to help guide
them along. They will start on the right side of the map and
work their way toward the left exit.

4
Area 1: Rare Seedling plant radiates a faint, pulsing light, cycling through hues of
gentle blues and greens. Its leaves are a vibrant silver edged
At the place where this path dead-ends, the Hero will with a soft glow, and as you draw closer, you feel a mild,
find the rare seedling needed to appease the tree ent soothing warmth emanating from it. The air around it thrums
in Area 2. They do not have to roll to find it. Read the with vitality, and even the earth beneath seems to hum with a
following boxed text: nourishing energy.

As you come upon a dead-end, your eyes catch a subtle, If the Hero is confused about what to do here, it is okay
unusual glint among the verdant foliage. Nestled at the base to tell them that the seedling looks like it might be of use
of an ancient oak, shielded by a crescent of emerald moss, to them later.
you discover a seedling. Unlike its mundane kin, this young

5
 Multiple Heroes Modification: No matter how many Heroes Equipment Needed:
are in the party, there is only one rare seedling. • 1 standard six-sided die
• A set of drink tokens (could be anything from pocket
change, poker chips, or any identical game pieces)
Area 2: Ancient Guardian • A drink for each player
When the Hero enters this Area, read the following • Paper and pen (for scorekeeping if desired)
boxed text:
Game Setup:
As you delve deeper into Foreverwood Forest, the trees grow Each player starts with 3 drink tokens.
older and the air becomes still, charged with a quiet power. There should also be a small pile of additional drink tokens
Sunlight filters through the ancient branches in thin, hazy to pull from.
shafts, dappling the ground with patches of light. The path The Deity will play as the Tree Master.
ahead leads to a small clearing, where the twisted and gnarled
figures of the forest’s oldest trees loom like silent sentinels Game Rules:
over a moss-covered glade.
The Hero represents a tree in the forest, and the roll
In the heart of this clearing stands a colossal tree ent, its bark
of the die determines their fate. The goal is to be the last
weathered and its limbs heavy with the passage of countless tree standing.
seasons. Vines drape over its broad shoulders like a regal
cloak, and its deep-set eyes flicker with a faint luminescence. Rolling the Seasons (Hero Turn) - On their turn, the Hero
The tree ent’s roots weave through the earth, creating a rolls the die to determine the season’s effect on their tree.
natural barrier that blocks the path forward. Each number corresponds to a different seasonal effect:

As you step into the clearing, the tree ent stirs, a deep 1 Spring - New Growth: Gain 1 drink token.
rumbling voice echoing through the air like the groan of 2 Summer - Drought: Take a sip and pass a drink token to
ancient wood. “Halt, small one. Why do you trespass in my
the Tree Master.
forest? Speak truly, for deceit will find you rooted in place,
never to leave the shadow of these boughs.” 3 Autumn - Shed Leaves: Nothing happens.
4 Winter - Frostbite: Take a sip, no token action.
5 Storm - Branch Break: The Tree Master takes a sip.
There are a few ways this interaction can play out. The 6 Wildfire: Roll again, and the Tree Master takes a sip.
Hero can attempt to reason with the tree ent, deceive it, or
fight it. If they are completely honest about their quest and The Tree Master rolls the die after the Hero has
promise to respect the forest, the tree ent will allow them had their turn.
to pass, but only if they carry out a series of tasks for it. The
first task is to find a rare seedling that would appease the 1 Bountiful Rain: The Hero gains a drink token.
tree ent, which can be found in Area 1. If the Hero destroys 2 Heatwave: The Hero takes a sip and gives the Tree
the seedling by eating it or in some other manner, they will Master a token.
not be able to complete the three tasks for the tree ent and 3 Harvest Tree: Nothing happens.
will be forced to find another method of passing through or 4 Blizzard: Everyone takes two sips, no token action.
around the Area. 5 Tornado: The Tree Master exchanges drink tokens
The second task is to perform an ancient rite of the forest with the Hero.
that honors the tree ent’s spirit. This is a Special Scenario. 6 Reforestation: The Tree Master gives the Hero two
drink tokens.
XXX – The ancient rite of the forest requires the Hero to
get in tune with nature by shedding all their clothing in real If a player has no drink tokens when they must give one,
time and then reciting the following lines: they are considered ‘chopped down’ and lose the game.
In multiplayer games, the last player with drink tokens
In the whispered embrace of the evergreen keep, remaining is the ‘Guardian of the Forest’ and wins the game.
We call upon the roots that run so deep.
Ancient guardians and spirits of the glade, Optional Rule: Photosynthesis
Hear my plea, let my intrusion fade. At any point during the game, a Hero can declare
“Photosynthesis” and skip their turn to gain two drink
They must remain naked for the entirety of their time in tokens. This can only be used once per Hero per game.
Foreverwood Forest.
Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes must shed their Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes must participate.
clothes and recite the poem. Each player represents a tree in the forest. Only the Deity is
DRINK – The ancient rite involves the Hero playing Timber the Tree Master. When the Tree Master rolls a number that
Tumble with the tree ent. would require them to take an action with a Hero (give them
a token, make them take a sip, exchange tokens), they may
choose which Hero takes that action.

6
BASE – The Hero must recite the poem below and pass a If, instead, the Hero decides to lie to the tree ent, they
Hard roll of 5 or higher to perform the ancient rite correctly. will have to pass a Hard roll of 5 or higher. Should the Hero
roleplay this especially well, the difficulty may be lowered to
In the whispered embrace of the evergreen keep, a Normal roll of 4 or higher. In the event that the Hero rolls
We call upon the roots that run so deep. successfully, the tree ent will allow them to pass, provided
Ancient guardians and spirits of the glade, they complete the three tasks as listed above. If they fail
Hear my plea, let my intrusion fade. the roll, the tree ent will see through their deception, and
combat will immediately ensue. Alternatively, instead of
While there’s no real consequence for not performing it performing the required tasks to gain the tree ent’s favor, the
correctly, read the following on a pass. Hero may choose to simply fight their way through.
The tree ent has the trait Weak to Fire, which means that
Upon completing the rite with heartfelt reverence, the Hero
all fire-based attacks toward it deal double damage. In the
waits in the hushed silence of the forest. As the last word case of a Critical Hit, the fire attack will do triple damage.
of their recitation fades into the air, a gentle breeze stirs Once the tree ent is defeated, the roots that once
the leaves, and the atmosphere is suffused with a warm, barred the way begin to retract, clearing the path ahead.
golden light. Unfortunately, the impact of the tree ent’s death is felt
throughout Foreverwood Forest. All enemies remaining in
the forest will now gain the Double Attack trait, which will
If the Hero fails the roll, read the following instead:
allow them to make two attacks on their turn.
Multiple Heroes Modification: No matter how many Heroes
As the final words of the rite hang uncertainly in the air, the are in the party, there is only one tree ent.
forest remains eerily silent. The tree ent’s gaze, which had Death: If the Hero dies in this Area, they will respawn at
begun to soften, hardens once more, and the ground beneath
the start of Foreverwood Forest.
your feet seems to thrum with a quiet disapproval. A chill
wind sweeps through the clearing, carrying a low, sorrowful
murmur through the branches above. Area 3: Corrupted Twig Ent
The corrupted twig ent in this Area has been tainting the
Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes must roll to forest. Defeating it will both complete the requirements for
perform the ancient rite and recite the words. If the majority the tree ent’s side quest in Area 2 as well as help the Hero to
pass the roll, the rite is performed correctly. If the majority be able to defeat the vines in Area 10.
fail the roll, the rite is performed incorrectly.

The third task the tree ent will require before clearing the
path is for the Hero to defeat the corrupted twig ent in Area
3 that has been tainting the forest.
Once the Hero has completed the three tasks and returned
to the tree ent, read the boxed text below:

The roots that once barred the way begin to retract, clearing
the path ahead. Stepping aside, the tree ent’s massive form
no longer stands as an obstacle.

TREE ENT
—
Roll to Hit: 3+
Health Points: 20

—
Traits: Night Vision, Weak to Fire
Sex Style: None
Languages: All
—
Description: A sentient tree that protects the forest.

ATTACKS
Trunk Stomp. Weaponless Attack: one target. Hit:
(2d4) damage.

Branch Lash. Weaponless Attack: one target. Hit: (2d4)

ranged damage.

7
 The Hero can engage with the traveler, who introduces
CORRUPTED TWIG ENT himself as Eldon, a merchant who often passes through the
forest but has never encountered such enchantment. He
—
Roll to Hit: 5+ explains that in his pack, partially buried under the fallen
Health Points: 6 leaves, he possesses some Potions of Healing, which he’s
willing to share if freed.
—
Traits: Night Vision, Weak to Fire The Hero can rescue Eldon in one of three ways: by
Sex Style: None attempting to untangle the vines with their hands, by using
Languages: None
the Grabby Hands spell, or by attacking them.
— Should the Hero possess the Grabby Hands spell, they
Description: A corrupted sentient twig that harms the
forest. can untangle the vines without any harm to Eldon. No roll
is necessary.
ATTACKS If the Hero doesn’t have the spell and decides to untangle
Annoying Prick. Weaponless Attack: one target. Hit: (1d4 -
the vines with their hands, doing so successfully will require
1) damage. passing a Normal roll of 4 or higher. On a failure, the vines
tighten, dealing 1d4 damage to Eldon. Eldon has 10 Health
Duplicate. Limited Spell: self Points, and if they are reduced to 0, he dies. Even if the Hero
fails their roll to untangle the vines the first time, they may
try again as many times as they wish until Eldon is either
Duplicate freed or dies.
Requirements: None
Alternatively, the Hero might try attacking the vines to
Type: Limited
free Eldon. The vines are magical and move when attacked.
Range: Self
They have a Roll to Hit of 4+ and 5 Health Points. If the Hero
Description: The caster creates a duplicate of itself.
fails their Roll to Hit, they deal 1d6 damage to Eldon instead.
Once Eldon is freed, he will gratefully offer the Hero a
This creature has the trait Weak to Fire. All fire-based
Potion of Healing, which restores 5 Health Points when
attacks toward these enemies deal double damage. In the case
drunk. If the Hero has not yet encountered the corrupted
of a Critical Hit, the fire attack will do triple damage.
twig ent, Eldon will also mention that the vines must have
The corrupted twig ent will use Annoying Prick for its
come alive because of some corruption in the forest. This
attack until it takes damage. If it is not killed the first time it
will hopefully clue them in that they will need to deal with
is hit, it will use its next turn to cast Duplicate. It will require
the corruption to pass the vines in Area 10. Additionally,
a Roll to Hit of 5+ to successfully cast the spell. Should the
Eldon can give the Hero directions to Evershade.
corrupted twig ent fail this roll, it will use its turn to cast
Should the Hero accidentally kill Eldon or decide
the spell until it succeeds. The spell can only be successfully
to just leave him to his fate, they can find 2 Potions of
cast once, even if the Hero dies. Each duplicate corrupted
Healing in his bag.
twig ent has the ability to cast the spell and will follow the
Once freed, Eldon can be seduced. His preferred style is
same pattern.
Spank Me, Daddy. Eldon likes nothing more than a good
Multiple Heroes Modification: If there is more than one
spanking. He’ll want the Hero to tell him exactly how bad
Hero in the party, there will be two corrupted twig ents.
he was for getting caught by the vines and request that they
Death: If the Hero dies in this Area, they will
punish him for his clumsiness. You should establish a safe
respawn in Area 2.
word before this roleplay begins.
Should the Hero accidentally kill Eldon, the
Area 4: Lost Traveler commotion will draw a twig ent to the Area, and it will
When the Hero reaches this Area, read the immediately attack.
following boxed text:

As you make your way through the dense underbrush of the

TWIG ENT
forest, a soft whimpering catches your attention. Parting the —
leaves, you come upon a small clearing where the scene of Roll to Hit: 5+
Health Points: 4
distress unfolds. A traveler, clothes torn and face etched with
exhaustion, is caught in a snare of living vines that tighten —
Traits: Night Vision, Weak to Fire
with every struggle. Sex Style: None
Languages: None
The vines are not just any flora; they pulse with a faintly
luminescent energy, a sign that the forest’s magic is at work. —
Description: A sentient twig that protects the forest.
The traveler sees you and calls out, “Please, help me! I’ve
been trapped by these accursed plants for hours. They seem
to react to my every move!”
ATTACKS
Annoying Prick. Weaponless Attack: one target. Hit: (1d4 -
1) damage.

8
 Twig ents have the trait Weak to Fire. All fire-based Mist dances over the surface of the Moonwell, twisting and
attacks toward these enemies deal double damage. In the case curling in patterns that suggest an otherworldly sentience.
of a Critical Hit, the fire attack will do triple damage. The air here is cool and refreshing, in stark contrast to
Multiple Heroes Modification: Add a twig ent for each Hero the rest of the forest, and carries with it the faint scent of
night-blooming jasmine. The trees surrounding the clearing
in the party.
are ancient and grand, their branches reaching up towards
Death: If the Hero dies in this Area or while fighting the the heavens as if in silent worship of the celestial body that
twig ents, they will respawn in whatever Area they entered graces them with its light.
this Area from.
Small, delicate flowers with petals that reflect the moon’s
Area 5: The Moonwell glow dot the clearing, and the soft hooting of an owl
complements the scene, creating a tranquil symphony for any
When the Hero enters this Area, read the boxed text below: who enter. It’s as though time itself slows within this sacred
space, granting a moment of respite and reflection for weary
travelers under the watchful eye of the moon.
As you traverse the dense thicket, navigating through the
gnarled trees and overgrown brush, a serene clarity begins
to fill the air. The oppressive weight of the forest seems to Interacting with the Moonwell will completely restore
lift, and a gentle luminescence beckons you forward. You find the Hero’s Health Points. However, doing so will require
yourself on the threshold of a circular clearing, bathed in the completing the Special Scenario below:
ethereal light of the full moon that hangs heavily in the ink-
black sky above.
XXX – To heal their wounds, the Hero must have sex with
The Moonwell lies at the heart of this sacred grove. It is a their Deity in the Moonwell. This will require the Hero and
pool of crystal-clear water, perfectly round and ringed by a Deity to have sex in a bathtub. If a bathtub isn’t available,
border of smooth, pale stones that shimmer with a dusting of having sex in a shower will suffice.
silver moonlight. The water is still, yet beneath the surface,
there is a faint glow as if the moon itself were cradled at the
bottom of the well, its light diffusing through the depths.

9
 Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes who wish to be BASE – The Hero must drink from the Moonwell. This will
healed by the Moonwell must have sex in the shower with require making and drinking the non-alcoholic version of a
either the Deity or another Hero. Lunar Eclipse Cocktail. Follow the recipe below this Special
DRINK – The Hero must drink from the Moonwell. This Scenario, but replace the Black Vodka and Blue Curaçao with
will require making and drinking a Lunar Eclipse Cocktail. blueberry juice and the Triple Sec with orange juice.
The recipe for this is below the Special Scenario. Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes who wish to be
Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes who wish to be healed by the Moonwell must drink a non-alcoholic Lunar
healed by the Moonwell must drink a Lunar Eclipse Cocktail. Eclipse Cocktail.

10
Lunar Eclipse Cocktail
Ingredients: TWIG ENT
• 1.5 oz Black Vodka (e.g., Blavod) —
• 0.5 oz Triple Sec Roll to Hit: 5+
Health Points: 4
• 1 oz Freshly squeezed lime juice
• 1 oz Simple syrup —
Traits: Night Vision, Weak to Fire
• 1 Egg white (for frothiness, optional) Sex Style: None
• 1/2 oz Blue Curaçao Languages: None
• 1/2 oz Grenadine —
• Edible silver glitter or silver shimmer dust (for garnish) Description: A sentient twig that protects the forest.
• Crushed ice
ATTACKS
Annoying Prick. Weaponless Attack: one target. Hit: (1d4 -
Instructions: 1) damage.
Prepare the Moon Froth:
• If you are using the egg white, in a shaker, combine
Death: If the Hero dies in this Area, they respawn in the
the egg white with a few drops of lime juice. Dry shake
last Area they came from.
(without ice) vigorously until frothy. This will be used to
top the drink and create a “moon surface” effect.
• Set aside. Area 7: Raging River
When the Hero reaches this Area, read the
Create the Lunar Base: boxed text below:

• In a cocktail shaker filled with ice, combine black vodka,

triple sec, the remaining lime juice, and simple syrup. As you continue down the path, the rhythmic sound of
rushing water grows increasingly insistent. Breaking through
• Shake well until the mixture is well-chilled.
the last of the underbrush, you are confronted with the sight
of a wide, fast-moving river. Its waters surge and flow with
Eclipse Layering: a grace and ferocity that suggests more than mere natural
forces at work. The river’s surface shimmers with iridescent
• Strain the base mixture into a chilled highball glass filled sparkles, and every so often, the water arcs into the air,
halfway with crushed ice. forming transient, intricate patterns before splashing back
• Slowly pour the Blue Curaçao over the back of a spoon to down with a musical tinkle. The banks on either side of the
create a layer on top of the black vodka mix. river are slick with moisture and moss, and the nearest bridge
is a ruin, its remnants jutting from the water like the ribs of
some great leviathan.
The Shadow’s Touch:
Again, using the back of a spoon, gently add the grenadine
The Hero can attempt to cross the river in a
to the glass so it sinks to the bottom, creating a reddish hue
variety of ways.
reminiscent of the shadow in a lunar eclipse.
To swim across the powerful currents, they will have to
succeed at a Very Hard roll of 6. The enchanted waters are
Final Phase:
deceptively strong, and those who dare to enter them must
• Gently spoon the frothy egg white mixture on top of the be powerful swimmers. Should the Hero fail this roll, they
drink to form a thick layer. will take 1d6 damage. If they survive the damage, they will be
• Sprinkle the top with edible silver glitter or silver shimmer swept downstream to Area 9. If they do not survive, they will
dust to represent the stars and moon’s surface. respawn at the start of Foreverwood Forest.
If the Hero uses their ingenuity to try to create some
kind of makeshift bridge with fallen logs or by trying to
Garnish:
leap from stone to stone, they must pass a Hard roll of 5 or
Optionally, you can add a slice of lime or a twist to the rim
higher. Succeeding at this requires nimble movements and
of the glass as a garnish.
keen balance as the magical waters seem to tug at the feet
of the unwary. Should the Hero fail this roll, they will take
Area 6: Lone Twig Ent 1d6 damage. If they survive the damage, they will be swept
Where this path dead-ends, the Hero will encounter a downstream to Area 9. If they do not survive this, they will
lone twig ent. respawn at the start of Foreverwood Forest.
Twig ents have the trait Weak to Fire. All fire-based A Hero who possesses a spell or item that freezes surfaces
attacks toward these enemies deal double damage. In the case may pass across the river without issue.
of a Critical Hit, the fire attack will do triple damage.
Multiple Heroes Modification: No matter how many Heroes
are in the party, there’s only one twig ent.

11
 Should the Hero manage to cross the river safely, they will
automatically find a Potion of Will buried in the dirty on the
Area 8: Idol of Foreverwood
When the Hero reaches the bend in this path, read the
other side. It does not matter which side they crossed the
following text:
river from.

Potion of Will As you continue your journey, the air grows thick, almost
Type: One-Time Use palpable, with a creeping sense of unease. The canopy above
Description: If drunk, the user becomes resistant to being twists into gnarled shapes, blocking out most of the light,
charmed for three combat encounters. casting the world in a perpetual twilight. A heavy silence
presses in around you, broken only by the occasional distant
caw of a raven.

12
 Emerging into a small, shadow-drenched clearing, you are
met with an unsettling sight: an idol stands ominously in the
Area 9: Water-Based Lube
center, carved from a single block of obsidian that drinks
in the scant light. It’s shaped like a phallus, the girth of the
Monster
middle double the size of the head, as if there’s a massive The river from Area 7 has narrowed into a trickling stream
load stuck in the pipes, a blockage not allowing it to escape. in this Area. Whether the Hero wanders upon this Area
from the south or is swept here from Area 7, a water-based
The ground around the base of the idol is barren, the earth lube monster will emerge from the stream and attack.
scorched and devoid of life, as if the forest itself recoils from
its presence. Despite the clear malevolence that hangs about
it like a shroud, there is something undeniably alluring about
the idol. It beckons to you, a siren’s call that tugs at the edges
WATER-BASED LUBE
of your mind, urging you to come closer, to reach out and
touch the cold, smooth surface of the dark stone.
MONSTER
—
Roll to Hit: 4+
A faint whisper winds its way through the trees, a murmur Health Points: 18
that might be the wind or perhaps something more as it
caresses your thoughts with promises of power, secrets, and —
Traits: Night Vision. Invisible while in water. Can only be harmed
hidden knowledge that could be yours with just a touch. The by magic.
air around the idol seems to shimmer with a subtle, dark Sex Style: None
energy, a pull that is as intriguing as it is foreboding. Languages: None
—
Description: This is the essence of water. These creatures
This is the Idol of Foreverwood. Should the Hero decide to
are typically harvested and killed to be turned into
touch it, they must complete the Special Scenario below:
expensive personal lubricant.
XXX – For touching the idol, the Hero suffers the curse of
ATTACKS
Foreverwood. If the Hero is male, they must put on a cock
Hard to Swallow. Weaponless Attack: one target. Hit: (1d4 +
ring and wear it for 30 minutes or until they are able to 1) damage.
escape Foreverwood Forest. If the Hero is female, they must
wear a nipple erector set for 30 minutes or until they are
able to escape Foreverwood Forest. In the case that a nipple Multiple Heroes Modification: No matter how many Heroes
erector set is not available, they must keep their nipples hard are in the party, there is only one water-based lube monster.
by whatever means necessary until they leave Foreverwood Death: If the Hero dies in this Area, they respawn in
Forest. This can be accomplished with either frequent nipple whatever Area they entered this one from.
play or the use of ice.
Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes who touch the
idol must do this.
Area 10: The Ruins’ Threshold
DRINK – Should the Hero touch the idol, they become Before the Hero can reach the ruins, they must first get
unbearably thirsty and are compelled to wrap their lips through a wall of thorns. When they arrive at this Area, read
around the idol and drink its full load. To do this, they must the boxed text below:
finish their entire beverage (wine, beer, or a cocktail) in 30
seconds or will drown on the load and respawn at the start of Ahead, the skeletal remains of ancient structures loom like
Foreverwood Forest. sentinels at the threshold of a forgotten realm. Before you
Multiple Heroes Modification: The first Hero to touch the can explore the remnants of the past, however, your path
idol will immediately suffer this fate, showing the others it’s is barred by a sprawling labyrinth of thorns. The thicket
is colossal, its brambles woven into walls that tower over
a bad idea. However, if any other Heroes touch the idol, they
you, impenetrable and seemingly unending. The thorns
will also have to do this. glisten with a faint magical sheen, and the air is thick with
BASE – Should the Hero touch the idol, they feel an the scent of roses and copper—a smell that speaks to the
uncontrollable compulsion to shove it inside themselves. enchantments woven into the very lifeblood of the plant.
They will make two attempts to do this. The first attempt
will cause 1d10 damage. The second attempt will cause 1d8
damage. If this does not kill them, they will regain their Depending on the Hero’s prior actions within
senses. If it does kill them, they will respawn at the start of Foreverwood Forest, the difficulty of this obstacle may vary.
Foreverwood Forest. A base Hard roll of 5+ is required for safe passage through
Multiple Heroes Modification: The first Hero to touch the the thorns, but this roll can be modified in several ways:
idol will immediately suffer this fate, showing the others it’s • If the Hero brought the tree ent in Area 2 a rare seedling,
a bad idea. However, if any other Heroes touch the idol, they reduce the difficulty of the roll by 1.
will also have to do this. • If the Hero completed the ancient ritual for the tree ent
in Area 2, reduce the difficulty of the roll by 1.
• If the Hero defeated the corrupted twig ent in Area 3,
reduce the difficulty of the roll by 1.

13
 • If the Hero defeated the tree ent in Area 2, increase the
difficulty of the roll by 1
Area 1: Entrance Puzzle
Once the Hero reaches this Area, read them the
boxed text below:
The difficulty of the roll can be no less than a Very Easy
roll of 2 and no more difficult than a Very Hard roll of 6.
Should they pass this roll, they are able to navigate Passing the thorny tendrils reveals the grand archway that
through the thorns safely and reach the ruins beyond. If marks the entrance to the ruins. Flanking the archway stand
they fail the roll, one of the thorny vines wraps around their two towering statues, each carved from stone that seems to
right leg, dealing 1d4 damage. The vine has 1 Health Point absorb the light around them. One statue bears the visage of
a woman on her knees, her arms outstretched as if reaching
and a Roll to Hit of 4+, and it must be cut free before the
around something. Her eyes are closed and her mouth is in
Hero can proceed. Should the Hero fail their Roll to Hit, a the shape of an O. The other is that of a man, his legs slightly
second vine ensnares their left leg, inflicting an additional spread, his head tilted downward as if looking at something.
1d4 damage. Both vines must be dealt with before the Hero
can move forward. Each time the Hero fails their Roll to
Hit, another vine will ensnare them and deal 1d4 damage, Solving the puzzle requires completing the Special
with a maximum of four vines. The third vine targets Scenario below:
their right arm, and the fourth, their left arm. If the Hero
becomes fully restrained by vines, they automatically die and XXX – The Hero and Deity must come together to complete
respawn in Area 5. what the statues are meant to do. In this particular instance,
If the Hero manages to cut all the vines free, they must roll the female partner will give the male partner oral sex until
again to safely pass the thorns. Failure to pass this roll will he is satisfied while he stands and she kneels. In same sex
result in a repeat of the encounter with the vines. couples, whichever partner prefers can be the giver.
In the event the Hero defeated the tree ent in Area 2 but If the Hero does not wish to perform this action, the
has not defeated the corrupted twig ent in Area 3, thus statues will come to life, one at a time, and attack. The Hero
requiring a Very Hard roll of 6 to pass the vines, after the will only gain entry to the ruins after defeating both statues.
first time they die in this Area, suggest that there must be Their stat block is below this Special Scenario.
some corruption in Foreverwood Forest making this obstacle Once either the required action is performed or both
particularly difficult. statues are defeated, the door to the ruins will open.
Fire has no effect on the magical vines. Should a Hero use Multiple Heroes Modification: Only two people need to do
a spell or item that detects magic in this Area, inform them this. The Deity does not need to be involved.
of this. Also inform them of the corruption in Foreverwood DRINK – There is no DRINK version. Refer to the BASE
Forest if they have not yet defeated the corrupted twig version below.
ent in Area 3. BASE – Between the statues, embedded in the archway, is a
Multiple Heroes Modification: Each Hero must roll to pass stone tablet inscribed with a series of ancient runes that pulse
the vines individually. If one Hero is restrained by the vines, with a faint golden light. The runes shift and change before
another Hero may roll to free them, even if all four of their settling into a language that the Hero can comprehend. The
limbs are strained. However, if that Hero fails their roll, tablet is the key to entering the ruins, presenting a riddle that
they end up restrained and take damage. In parties with must be solved to gain access:
multiple Heroes, an individual Hero will not die if they are
fully restrained. However, if all party members become fully I am in life and death,
restrained, the entire party perishes. the beginning of eternity,
The end of time and space.
What am I?
Scenario 2: Ruins of The answer to the riddle is the letter ‘E’. It is found in the
Evershade word ‘life’ and ‘death,’ it starts the word ‘eternity’ and ends
‘time’ and ‘space.’
In this part of the adventure, the Hero must first gain entry
If the Hero answers the riddle incorrectly, the male statue
into the Ruins of Evershade before facing the three trials
will come to life and attack. Once it has been defeated, the
of Evershade. Completing each of the trials will grant the
Hero will get another guess. Should they fail their second
Hero a piece of the Ultimate Dildo 9000. Once all pieces
guess, the female statue will rise and attack. Once either the
have been gathered, the Hero must decide whether they wish
riddle is solved or both statues are defeated, the door to the
to unite the pieces once more or return them to Thalion
ruins will open.
Whispwood. Use the map on the following page to help the
Multiple Heroes Modification: The Heroes must collectively
Hero navigate through the Ruins of Evershade.
guess. Only one answer is permitted per guess.
Multiple Heroes Modification: If there is more than one
Hero in the party, increase the Health Points of the Male
Ruin Statue to 12 and the Female Ruin Statue to 10.
Death: If the Hero dies in this Area, they respawn where
they died.

14
15
 MALE RUIN STATUE FEMALE RUIN STATUE
—
Roll to Hit: 4+ —
Roll to Hit: 4+
Health Points: 6 Health Points: 5

—
Traits: None —
Traits: None
Sex Style: None Sex Style: None
Languages: None Languages: None
— —
Description: A male marble statue that guards the Description: A female marble statue that guards the
entrance to the Ruins of Evershade. entrance to the Ruins of Evershade.

ATTACKS ATTACKS
Marble Punch. Weaponless Attack: one target. Hit: (2) damage. Slap. Weaponless Attack: one target. Hit: (1) damage.

Area 2: Trial of Strength

When the Hero reaches this Area, read the
following boxed text:

You find yourself in a grand hall, its vaulted ceilings supported

by rows of colossal columns. The air is thick with the dust
of ages and the weight of a silent magic that permeates the
stones themselves.

As you move forward, torches along the walls ignite with

a blue flame, casting an ethereal glow across the chamber.
Ahead, a dais holds an altar, upon which rests a glittering
fragment of glass—one of the shards of the Ultimate Dildo
9000. Next to the alter is a giant phallic statue.

16
 If the Hero uses an item or spell to detect magic, they The center of this round chamber holds a grand pedestal with
can tell that the giant phallic statue is magical. However, it an empty indentation shaped for a shard. Surrounding this
remains immobile until the Hero touches the shard of the pedestal are six statues, each depicting a figure in a seductive
Ultimate Dildo 9000, at which point, the statue comes to life pose. All of them face away from the pedestal. Upon closer
inspection, there are plaques with inscriptions below each
and attacks. Even if the Hero attacks the phallic statue before
statue that offer cryptic clues.
touching the Ultimate Dildo 9000 (this does not require a
Roll to Hit), it does not react. The Hero can deal damage
to the phallic statue or even completely destroy it before In the XXX version, the statues must be completed in
touching the shard of the Ultimate Dildo 9000. a specific order. If the Hero approaches the wrong statue,
the inscription below it will appear in a language they have
never seen before. Only when they approach the correct
PHALLIC STATUE statue will they be able to read what the inscription says.
For the BASE version, the statues can be approached in
—
Roll to Hit: 3+ any order. The statues are listed on the following page in
Health Points: 20 the order in which they must be approached for the XXX
version of the game.
—
Traits: None
Sex Style: None
Languages: None
—
Description: A giant marble statue shaped like a penis that
serves as the Trial of Strength to obtain a shard of the
Ultimate Dildo 9000.

ATTACKS
Dick Slap. Weaponless Attack: one target. Hit: (1d4) damage.

Sticky Splooge. Limited Spell: one target. Hit: (1d4)

ranged damage.

Sticky Splooge
Requirements: Must be able to move hands
Type: Limited
Range: Ranged
Description: You unleash your sexual fluids at a target,
though you’re a bit dehydrated, so they’ve become quite
sticky. On a hit, the target takes 1d4 damage and is glued to
the ground, causing them to use their next combat action
to struggle free. It will take a Normal roll of 4+ to break
free from the sticky splooge. If unsuccessful, they must
continue to use their combat action to free themselves until
they succeed.

The phallic statue will cast Sticky Splooge until the spell
succeeds. Then, it will switch to using its Dick Slap attack. It
can only cast Sticky Splooge once per Hero life.
Once the phallic statue is defeated, the Hero may safely
remove the shard of the Ultimate Dildo 9000.
Multiple Heroes Modification: For every additional Hero in
the party, add +5 to the phallic statue’s Health Points.
Death: If the Hero dies in this Area, they respawn in
whatever Area they entered from.

Area 3: Trial of Wisdom

This Area will look very different depending on which
version of the game is being played, and the entire Area is a
Special Scenario. For the XXX and the BASE version, read
the following boxed text to the Hero:

17
 Each time the Hero completes one of the tasks, the pedestal Multiple Heroes Modification: Only one Hero needs to do
will flash brightly, and a ghostly outline of the shard of the this. Whoever does this must wear their chosen item for
Ultimate Dildo 9000 will appear, growing opaquer with each the remainder of the adventure. If they are blindfolded, they
task performed. The shard will only be completely solidified automatically get a -1 to their Roll to Hit against enemies
and able to be claimed once all tasks have been completed. for the remainder of the adventure. If they wear a ball gag,
they cannot cast spells that would require them to be able to
The Kissing Statue – This statue depicts a human woman speak. Should they have their hands bound, they cannot use
puckered up and leaning forward as if she’s about to kiss weapons and can only use spells that do not require the use
someone. The inscription below it reads as follows: of their hands.

In the hush of twilight’s blush, two lips meet, soft and sweet, The Statue of Touch – This depicts a human male
Whispers dance in gentle tryst, as shadows merge in mist, seductively running his hands over his naked torso. The
Time suspends its endless flight, in the silence of the kissing rite, inscription below it reads as follows:
Worlds collide in tender bliss, sealed within a lover’s kiss.
Whispers of fingertips on curves, a trail,
XXX – The Hero must lean in and kiss the statue, roleplayed Electric shivers, tender, without fail,
by the Deity A language spoken without a single word,
Multiple Heroes Modification: Only one Hero In the art of touch, truest feelings heard.
needs to do this.
XXX – The Hero must pleasure the statue, played by
The Seductive Statue – This statue depicts an elven man the Deity, with physical touch. This could be by giving
casting a smoldering gaze upon the Hero. The inscription them a back massage, fingering them or giving them a
below it reads as follows: handjob, or sensually running their hands over the statues
erogenous zones.
A gaze that glides like silk on skin, a dance of eyes that Multiple Heroes Modification: Only one Hero
delve within, needs to do this.
A murmur low, the siren’s call, through veiled intent, the
heartstrings fall, The Statue of Anal – Unlike the other full-body
A touch, a tease, a slow delight, that draws the soul statues, this one is simply a butt with no torso or legs. The
into the night, inscription below it reads as follows:
Seduction weaves its subtle thread, where whispered
promises are shed. My forbidden curves,
Your pleasure will touch,
XXX – The Hero must seduce the statue. This can be by To some, I’m just right.
undressing for it, talking dirty to it, doing a strip tease for it, To some, I’m too much.
or any other sufficient manner. This will continue until the
statue, played by the Deity, is satisfied. XXX – The Hero must anally pleasure the statue, played
Multiple Heroes Modification: Only one Hero by the Deity. This could be by fingering them anally, giving
needs to do this. them a rim job, or by having anal sex.
Multiple Heroes Modification: Only one Hero
The Statue of Denial – This statue of a female dwarf needs to do this.
is depicted wearing a blindfold, ball gag, and with her
hands bound in front of her. The inscription below it The Statue of Pleasure – This statue depicts a male and
reads as follows: female elven couple in a curious position. Lying on her back,
the female elf has one leg held up in the air while the male
See no evil, elf thrusts between her legs, stimulating her clit at the same
Speak no evil, time. The inscription below it reads as follows:
Feel no evil.
In fleeting breaths, pleasure weaves its spell,
XXX – The Hero must choose to either be blindfolded, wear A symphony of senses, a silent swell,
a ball gag, or have their hands bound for the remainder of Beneath the moon’s soft, silvered treasure trove,
their time in this Area. We find the sweetest depth of erotic love.

18
XXX – The Hero must perform The Butter Churn position The spirit of sex only has one attack. Sexual Sap will
with the Deity. To do this, the female partner lies on her remove the Hero’s ability to cast a single spell for the
back with her bottom propped up on pillows. She keeps one remainder of the adventure. If the Hero has any Limited
leg bent and the other reaching toward the sky. The male Spells, Sexual Sap will remove any one random Limited Spell
partner helps to stabilize the skyward leg with one hand first. Should the Hero lose all their Limited Spells, Sexual Sap
while he kneels between her legs, thrusting inside of her will remove any one random Unlimited Spell.
while stimulating her clit with his other hand. If the Hero has no remaining spells, the spirit of sex will
Multiple Heroes Modification: Two Heroes can do this attack the Hero and force them to orgasm by any means
together or a Hero and the Deity can do it together. necessary. This will be carried out in real life, with the spirit
of sex being roleplayed by the Deity. Once this is complete,
the Hero will enter a state of Exhaustion and lose 1 Health
Point. Their next Roll to Hit will also be reduced by -1.
Having stolen the Hero’s sexual energy, the spirit of sex
will vanish.
If the Hero is not able to achieve orgasm, their Health
will instead be reduced by 1/3rd of their maximum
Health rounded up, and their next Roll to Hit will also be
reduced by -1.
The spirit of sex will attack with Sexual Sap once. After
it hits, the Hero will have one chance to hit the spirit of sex
before it disappears. If they kill it, they will get their spell
back. If they don’t, they will lose the ability to use that spell
for the remainder of the adventure.
For the BASE and DRINK version, if the Hero has no
more spells to lose, their Health will instead be reduced by
1/3rd of their maximum Health rounded up, and their next
Roll to Hit will also be reduced by -1. After this attack hits
the first time, the spirit of sex will vanish.
Multiple Heroes Modification: The spirit of sex will remain
materialized until it’s hit every Hero in the party with the
Sexual Sap spell once. Then, it will disappear.
Death: If the Hero dies in this Area, they respawn in
If the Hero or Deity is uncomfortable performing any whatever Area they entered from.
of the acts, they instead can choose to face the spirit of sex
inside that statue. Defeating it will have the same result as Below is the BASE version for this Area. To complete
completing the act. the requirements of each statue, the Hero must answer a
riddle. They will only have one chance to answer correctly.
If they get it wrong, a spirit of sex will emerge from the
SPIRIT OF SEX statue and attack.
—
Roll to Hit: 4+ The Kissing Statue – This statue depicts a human woman
Health Points: 7 puckered up and leaning forward as if she’s about to kiss
—
Traits: Can only be harmed by magic
someone. The inscription below it reads as follows:
Sex Style: Forced Orgasm (only the Spirit of Sex can perform
this on the Hero. Not vice versa.) What is the scientific term for the study of kissing?
Languages: None
— BASE – The Hero must guess the answer correctly, which is
Description: An amorphous, glowing mass of sexual philematology.
energy that absorbs the sex magic from the Area. Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes may only make
one collective guess. No matter how many Heroes are in
ATTACKS the party, only one spirit of sex emerges if they get the
Sexual Sap. Limited Spell: one target. answer wrong.

Sexual Sap The Seductive Statue – This statue depicts an elven man
Requirements: None casting a smoldering gaze upon the Hero. The inscription
Type: Limited below it reads as follows:
Range: Ranged
Description: You remove a Cummancer’s ability to cast a In the animal kingdom, which bird is known for its elaborate
random spell. seduction rituals, which include intricate dances and the
construction of elaborately decorated structures?

19
 BASE – The Hero must guess the answer correctly, which is The Statue of Touch – This depicts a human male
the Bowerbird. seductively running his hands over his naked torso. The
Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes may only make inscription below it reads as follows:
one collective guess. No matter how many Heroes are in
the party, only one spirit of sex emerges if they get the What is the name of the hormone commonly known as the ‘love
answer wrong. hormone,’ which is released during physical touch and is associated
with bonding, trust, and empathy?
The Statue of Denial – This statue of a female dwarf
is depicted wearing a blindfold, ball gag, and with her BASE – The Hero must guess the answer correctly, which
hands bound in front of her. The inscription below it is oxytocin.
reads as follows: Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes may only make
one collective guess. No matter how many Heroes are in
What psychological phenomenon explains why the removal of the party, only one spirit of sex emerges if they get the
sight, such as with the use of blindfolds, can lead to heightened answer wrong.
sensations in other senses?
The Statue of Anal – Unlike the other full-body
BASE – The Hero must guess the answer correctly, which is statues, this one is simply a butt with no torso or legs. The
sensory deprivation. inscription below it reads as follows:
Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes may only make
one collective guess. No matter how many Heroes are in Does the anus contract during orgasm?
the party, only one spirit of sex emerges if they get the
answer wrong. BASE – The Hero must guess the answer correctly,
which is yes.

20
 Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes may only make DRINK – The Hero must guess the answer correctly, which
one collective guess. No matter how many Heroes are in is the vintage. If they get the answer wrong, they must take 3
the party, only one spirit of sex emerges if they get the drinks of any type of wine.
answer wrong. Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes may only make
one collective guess. If they get the answer wrong, all
The Statue of Pleasure – This statue depicts a male and Heroes must drink.
female elven couple in a curious position. Lying on her back,
the female elf has one leg held up in the air while the male The Rum Statue – This is a statue of a bottle of rum. The
elf thrusts between her legs, stimulating her clit at the same label across the front has the word ‘rum’ chiselled into it. The
time. The inscription below it reads as follows: inscription below the bottle reads as follows:

Which neurotransmitter is often referred to as the body’s What is the name of the byproduct from sugar production that
natural “feel-good” chemical, known to play a key role in the is most commonly fermented and distilled to make rum?
reward system of the brain and is released during intimate
physical contact? DRINK – The Hero must guess the answer correctly, which
is molasses. If they get the answer wrong, they must take
BASE – The Hero must guess the answer correctly, which one-ounce shot of rum.
is dopamine. Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes may only make
Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes may only make one collective guess. If they get the answer wrong, all
one collective guess. No matter how many Heroes are in Heroes must drink.
the party, only one spirit of sex emerges if they get the
answer wrong. The Tequila Statue – This is a statue of a bottle of tequila.
The label across the front has the word ‘tequila’ chiselled into
If playing the DRINK version of the game, read the it. The inscription below the bottle reads as follows:
boxed text below:
Which plant is tequila specifically distilled from?
The center of this round chamber holds a grand pedestal
with an empty indentation shaped for one of the shards. DRINK – The Hero must guess the answer correctly. There
Surrounding this pedestal are six statues of giant bottles, are a few correct answers to this question, the simplest of
each with a different label. All of them face away from the which is the blue agave plant (Agave tequilana). Tequila
pedestal. Upon closer inspection, there are plaques with must be made from the fermented juices of the Weber blue
inscriptions below each statue that depict a question. variety of agave, particularly in the region surrounding
the city of Tequila and in the highlands (Los Altos) of the
List the statues off to the Hero and allow them to pick central western Mexican state of Jalisco. Any of the above
which one they wish to approach, as this will have a direct information will suffice as answering the question correctly.
effect on what they will be forced to drink should they fail If they get the answer wrong, they must take one-ounce
the associated riddle. shot of tequila.
Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes may only make
The Beer Statue – This statue looks like a giant bottle of one collective guess. If they get the answer wrong, all
beer. The label across the front has the word ‘beer’ chiselled Heroes must drink.
into it. The inscription below the bottle reads as follows:
The Vodka Statue – This is a statue of a bottle of vodka.
What is the name of the process by which beer is carbonated and The label across the front has the word ‘vodka’ chiselled into
alcohol is produced, involving the fermentation of sugars by yeast? it. The inscription below the bottle reads as follows:

DRINK – The Hero must guess the answer correctly, which Traditionally, vodka is distilled from what type of
is brewing. If they get the answer wrong, they must take 3 fermentable material?
drinks of any type of beer.
Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes may only make DRINK – The Hero must guess the answer correctly. There
one collective guess. If they get the answer wrong, all are a few correct answers to this question, the simplest of
Heroes must drink. which are potatoes or grains. Vodka can be distilled from any
fermentable material, but it is most commonly made from
The Wine Statue – This is a statue of a long-stemmed grains such as wheat, corn, rye, or potatoes. If they get the
glass of wine which appears to have only enough inside for a answer wrong, they must take a one-ounce shot of vodka.
tasting. The inscription below it reads as follows: Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes may only make
one collective guess. If they get the answer wrong, all
What is the term for the year in which the grapes were Heroes must drink.
harvested to produce a bottle of wine, which can significantly affect
the taste and quality of the wine?

21
 The Whiskey Statue – This is a statue of a bottle DRINK – The Hero must guess the answer correctly, which
of whiskey. The label across the front has the word is maturation. If they get the answer wrong, they must take
‘whiskey’ chiselled into it. The inscription below the bottle one-ounce shot of whiskey.
reads as follows: Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes may only make
one collective guess. If they get the answer wrong, all
What is the name of the process by which whiskey is aged Heroes must drink.
to develop its flavors, often resulting in a change of color and
taste over time? If the Hero fails to answer more than three questions
correctly, a Spirit of Sex will spawn in place of them
having to drink.

22
 Once the Hero completes the requirements of all
six statues, the shard of the Ultimate Dildo 9000 will
materialize, and they will be able to take it.

Area 4: Trial of Courage

No matter which Area the Hero enters this illusionary room
from, they see the same thing, and the door to Area 5 is only
revealed if they are able to retrieve the shard of the Ultimate
Dildo 9000 here. When the hero enters this Area, read the
boxed text below:

You step into a narrow corridor dimly lit by flickering

torches ensconced in the walls. The air is thick with the
scent of ancient dust and the faint tang of metal. The walls
are inscribed with arcane symbols that pulse with a faint,
otherworldly energy, suggesting that magic is at work in this
treacherous place.

The first trap in this corridor is a volley of arrows that

shoots from the walls. A Hero who uses a spell or item
that detects magic will automatically be aware of the trap. The Hero will start at the bottom of the mosaic and work
Otherwise, noticing the trap will require searching the their way up. To safely cross the room, they must step only
corridor and passing a Hard roll of 5 or higher. on the tiles depicting dragons, griffins, and phoenixes. Any
There is no way to disable it. All the Hero can do is hope tile with a unicorn will activate a trap. A clever Hero can
to avoid the volley. If they passed the previous check or were throw objects onto the tiles to test them.
able to detect the trap with a spell or item that detects magic, The Hero can move up, across, or diagonally. Stepping
avoiding the arrows will require an Easy roll of 3 or higher. on the first or third unicorn from the bottom will trigger
If they were not able to detect the trap, avoiding the arrows a cascade of deadly spikes to fall from above, dealing 1d10
will require a Normal roll of 4 or higher. Should the roll fail, damage. Stepping on the second or fourth unicorn from the
they will be skewered by arrows and take 1d10 damage. bottom will cause the floor to give way, opening a chasm
In the event the Hero dies from this obstacle, they will beneath the Hero’s feet. If either of these traps is triggered,
respawn in whatever Area they entered this Area from. have them make a Hard roll of 5 or higher. If they succeed
However, they will now be aware of the arrow trap and will on this roll, they manage to catch the ledge and avoid
only need to succeed at an Easy roll of 3 or higher to avoid it plummeting to their death. Should they fail the roll, they
the second time around. will perish.
Once this obstacle has been overcome, read the Multiple Heroes Modification: All Heroes will have to pass
boxed text below: the tiles on their own. However, one Hero may choose to
lead the way for the others.
Death: If the Hero dies in this Area, they respawn at the
The corridor opens into a wider chamber, where the floor
is a precarious mosaic of tiles depicting dragons, eagles, start of this puzzle.
phoenixes, and unicorns. A riddle inscribed on the floor
before the mosaic reads: Once this obstacle has been overcome, read the boxed text
on the following page:
Where fire breathes and courage lies, Only the pure can claim
the prize. Winged grace and rebirth’s flame, Avoid the horn
You come upon another corridor. A third of the way down,
that ends the game.
you see a deep recess in the wall on the right. Halfway down,
there’s another recess on the left. And close to the end, you
The riddle suggests a connection between the creatures notice a final recess in the wall on the right. As soon as you
and the safe path. Each line of the riddle corresponds to a set foot in the corridor, you hear a deep rumbling.
creature. “Where fire breathes” refers to dragons, known for
breathing fire. “Winged grace” refers to eagles. “Rebirth’s
flame” refers to phoenixes, associated with being reborn in
flames. The last line, “Avoid the horn that ends the game,”
warns that stepping on the unicorn, a creature known for its
single horn, will trigger a trap.

23
 If the Hero looks up, they will immediately notice that the require passing a Hard roll of 5 or higher. If any of these
first third of the ceiling in the corridor is starting to descend. rolls are failed, the ceiling falls on the Hero, and they die. If
Should they not bother to investigate and simply proceed, it the Hero made it to the first recess, the ceiling falls but they
will take succeeding at a Normal roll of 4+ to notice. In the remain safe and will then be able to traverse over it to the
event they don’t notice but decide to run to the first recess next section of the corridor without incident. Running all
anyway, getting there on time will require succeeding at the way to the end of the corridor is not possible. Should the
a Normal roll of 4+. If they noticed the ceiling falling, the Hero attempt this, they automatically die.
difficulty of this roll is reduced to an Easy roll of 3+. Should
they attempt to run to the next section, whether they noticed
the ceiling descending or not, getting there in time will

24
 In the event the Hero successfully passes the first third Collecting the three shards fulfills the requirements of this
of the corridor, the middle section of the ceiling will begin adventure. The Hero does not need to enter the stone doors
to descend as well. The Hero will automatically notice this. and proceed. Instead, they can return the shards to Thalion
Making it safely to the middle recess will require passing an Whispwood and collect their reward. If they choose this
Easy roll of 3+. Successfully skipping the recess and dashing option, Morgana Shadowmantle, the mad sorceress, will be
to the next section will require passing a Hard roll of 5+. waiting for them outside the ruins, prepared to engage in
The result for failing either of these rolls is death. If the Hero battle and attempt to steal the shards. In this case, refer to
made it to the second recess, the ceiling falls but they remain the information about Morgana in Area 5 to roleplay this
safe and will then be able to traverse over it to the next scenario accurately. She will not have the Corrupted Dildo
section of the corridor without incident. 9000 in her inventory.
The same rules as above apply for the final third of Multiple Heroes Modification: Heroes may take turns
the ceiling. selecting shards if they wish. Only the Hero who presses the
Multiple Heroes Modification: Instruct the Heroes to choose shard into the pedestal takes damage if it’s the wrong one.
a marching order before entering the corridor. The recesses Death: If the Hero dies here, they respawn on the floor
can only accommodate one Hero at a time; thus, if multiple next to the pedestal.
Heroes try to enter simultaneously, any Hero who cannot
fit must dash for the next section of the corridor. If the rest
of the Heroes hold back while one attempts to pass through
Area 5: The Fusion Chamber
and successfully reaches the first recess, the others can safely Should the Hero choose to enter this chamber, read the
traverse the fallen ceiling without needing to roll for it. boxed text below:
However, as soon as the first Hero sets foot in the second
part of the corridor, the ceiling in the initial section will rise Before you lies a vast circular room with walls adorned
and reset, obligating any Heroes who have crossed over to by intricate mosaics depicting every known race of The
dash in one direction or the other. Unbound Domain in the throes of passion. At the heart of
Death: If the Hero dies here, they respawn on the other the room stands a pedestal, its design simple yet elegant,
side of the puzzle and do not need to complete it. contrasting with the complexity that surrounds it.

The air is thick with arcane energy, and the only light comes
After the Hero conquers this part of the Trial of Courage,
from a pulsing glow at the chamber’s core. It bathes the room
read the boxed text below: in a soft, ethereal luminescence that seems to emanate from
the pedestal.
As you near the end of the corridor, a new challenge presents
itself: a large, open room where multiple glass shards float As your eyes adjust to the dim light, you notice the floor is
around a pedestal in the center of the room. An indentation not a mere surface, but a translucent pane of solidified mana,
in the middle of the pedestal beckons for a shard to fill it. beneath which swirls a kaleidoscope of colors—magical
energies trapped in perpetual motion, a storm contained.

The indentation in the middle of the pedestal is round

and will mold to whichever shard the Hero places there. A If the Hero approaches the pedestal, they will find an
clever Hero who possesses two of the shards already might indentation in it shaped like a dildo. They do not need to
decide to examine them to see which shard they believe is roll to determine that it matches the size of the shards they
the correct one. In this case, they can determine the correct have collected. Should they decide to fit the shards into the
shard with an Easy Roll of 2+. If they fail this roll, many of indentation, doing so correctly will require a Very Easy roll
the shards look too similar for them to be able to figure out of 2 or higher. If they fail this roll, simply tell them they got
which one is correct. A Hero who uses a spell or item to it wrong, and allow them to roll again. Once they succeed at
detect magic will be able to instantly tell the correct shard. this roll, read the following boxed text:
Otherwise, have the Hero choose which shard they’d like to
select and present to the pedestal. The shard marked with a As you lay the final piece of the shattered dildo into the
C is the correct one. All the others are illusions. If the wrong pedestal, you hear an audible click. The air around you begins
shard is presented to the pedestal, it will explode, dealing to crackle with energy, the atmosphere thickening with
1d4 damage to the Hero. Use the illustration on the previous anticipation. The shards, once separate and distinct, now
page as a reference. start to fuse together in a magnificent display of light and
Once the correct shard is presented to the pedestal and power. The relic, a mosaic of sexual energy, vibrates violently,
emitting a hum that reminds you of the strongest sex toy
the Hero has collected all three pieces of the Ultimate Dildo
you’ve ever heard.
9000, a set of stone double doors will replace the columns
behind the pedestal. These doors are unlocked. A sudden surge of power rushes outward from the relic, a
shockwave of force that washes over you with a warmth
that is both arousing and terrifying. You feel your hair
stand on end, your skin tingling as if electrified by the
unleashed energies.

25
 The relic itself rises, levitating above its pedestal as it glory, powers and all. They will only know this if they try
continues to transform. The shards, now fully integrated, to use it. If used during battle against an enemy, it has the
reform the Ultimate Dildo 9000 to its original state. It pulses following stats:
like a living thing, light refracting from it in all directions.
Ultimate Dildo 9000
As the initial blinding light begins to subside, the Ultimate Description: If throw at the feet of an enemy, that enemy
Dildo 9000 settles gently back onto the pedestal, a silent
will feel compelled to use it. Roll 1d4. The enemy will skip
offering to those brave and bold enough to claim it.
that many rounds of combat in lieu of masturbating with
Suddenly, a figure separates itself from the shadows that the Ultimate Dildo 9000. The enemy, played by the Deity,
cling to the far end of the chamber. The air shivers with a cold must break away from combat and masturbate with a glass
anticipation as she steps forward, her presence commanding dildo until the Hero has completed the required number
even the undulating energies to still. of turns. The Hero cannot hesitate or draw out combat
longer than necessary and must take all their turns within a
Her skin is the deep, rich brown of teak wood polished to a reasonable amount of time. The Ultimate Dildo 9000 works
high shine, but it seems to absorb light rather than reflect on all creatures, even those who do not have a sex style and
it, giving her an otherworldly appearance. Long, jet-black otherwise cannot be seduced. If the creature reaches climax,
hair falls in a straight curtain around her face, the ends
they additionally suffer Exhaustion and will miss their
disappearing into the folds of her shadowy robes. Her eyes
glow with a malevolent crimson light, like embers in the dark first Roll to Hit that otherwise would have succeeded. The
heart of a fire. Ultimate Dildo 9000 can only be used against each individual
enemy once. In the BASE version of the game, the target will
The robes that drape over her slender frame are exquisite, simply skip that many turns.
made of a fabric that shifts with colors not entirely of this
realm. Embroidered along the hem and cuffs are arcane Morgana will attempt to persuade the Hero that the power
symbols that shimmer with a spectral light, and a faint aura of of the Ultimate Dildo 9000 remains dormant, even though
darkness hovers around her, as if the shadows themselves are it has been reassembled, and that she is the only one with
loath to leave her side.
sufficiently powerful magic to activate it. Despite her talents
as a sorceress, her skills in deception are lacking. The Hero
A sense of immense power emanates from her. She raises her
gaze to meet yours, and the air grows colder still. “So,” she will be able to detect the falsehood with a Normal roll of 4
begins, “you have come to mend that which was broken. And or higher. The dark energies surrounding her are simply too
I am here to return it to its former power.” intense for her to harbor any benevolent intentions. If they
fail this roll, they find Morgana quite charismatic and are
fairly convinced she is flirting with them.
This is Morgana Shadowmantle, the mad sorceress that If at any point the Hero entrusts the Ultimate Dildo 9000
Thalion Whispwood warned the Hero about. She was once to Morgana, her touch immediately corrupts it. She has
a prodigious young mage with a radiant future. Born to a had the spell ready for years, merely waiting for someone
family of respected arcane scholars, Morgana was immersed to reassemble the pieces. Unfortunately for her, the magic
in ancient texts and magical theories from a tender age. Her within the ruins had shielded the shards of the Ultimate
talent for weaving spells was unparalleled, and her hunger Dildo 9000 from her reach. But with its reassembly, that
for knowledge insatiable. protective magic is no longer in effect.
As she grew, Morgana became particularly fascinated with
the forces of sex magic. Her research led her down the path
of forbidden knowledge, delving into dark arts that promised MORGANA
pleasure beyond comprehension at the expense of driving
the user insane.
SHADOWMANTLE
With each forbidden spell she mastered, a sliver of her —
Roll to Hit: 4+
sanity eroded, replaced by whispers from the void. Her once Health Points: 18
noble pursuit of knowledge became a mad quest for sexual
power. Morgana’s experiments with dark sex magic caused a —
Traits: None
cataclysmic event that destroyed her family’s estate, leaving a Sex Style: Ultimate Dildo 9000
Languages: Common, Elvish, Cuntaur
twisted, arcane wasteland in its wake.
Surviving the disaster, Morgana emerged as a being of —
Description: A sorceress driven mad by her pursuit of sex
shadows, her body and soul fused with the dark energies she
magic and twisting it to her nefarious pleasure.
had unleashed.
Her ambitions grew darker as she sought the fragments
ATTACKS
of the Ultimate Dildo 9000 that was said to unlock godlike
Dagger. Melee Weapon Attack: one target. Hit: (1d4) damage.
sexual pleasure. Morgana plans to corrupt it so that whoever
dares to use it will be enchanted to masturbate to death, Fire Bolt. Weaponless Magic Attack: one target. Hit: (1d8)
forgoing their basic needs in the pursuit of repeated pleasure. ranged fire damage.
Little does the Hero know that just by reuniting the parts
Full Body Condom. Limited Spell: self
of the Ultimate Dildo 9000, it was restored to its former
Corrupted Ultimate Dildo 9000. Magical Item: one-target

26
 Once Morgana has the Ultimate Dildo 9000, she has no Combat with Morgana will proceed as follows: She will
further use for the Hero and will attack. use her first combat action to cast Full Body Condom. No
Roll to Hit is necessary for the spell to take effect. For her
Full Body Condom next combat action, if she has the Corrupted Ultimate
Requirements: None. Dildo 9000 in her possession, she will throw it at the
Type: Limited Hero’s feet, and the Hero will immediately have to roll to
Range: Self resist its effects. Afterward, Morgana will engage with her
Description: A thin lambskin sheath forms around you. dagger if the Hero is in close-range combat, or with Fire
You may trigger this when a foe attacks to reduce incoming Bolt if they are engaging her from a distance with a ranged
physical or magic damage by 5. It does not cost an action. weapon or spell.
If the Hero manages to defeat Morgana after she has
Corrupted Ultimate Dildo 9000 corrupted the Ultimate Dildo 9000, there is unfortunately no
Description: Morgana will throw the Ultimate Dildo 9000 way to return it to normal, and it can only be safely handled
at the Hero’s feet. The Hero must then pass a Normal roll by Morgana. Should the Hero attempt to pick it up, they will
of 4 or higher to resist the urge to pick it up and use it. If be compelled to masturbate with it until they die. In this case,
they pass this roll, they will have to make this roll again for they must masturbate with a glass dildo until they climax.
each round of combat. On a failure, the Hero picks up the If they are unable to achieve climax, they must masturbate
Corrupted Ultimate Dildo 9000 and will end combat to with it for 10 minutes, at which point, they die and respawn
begin masturbating with it. To roleplay this, the Hero must in whatever area they faced Morgana. Their only options
masturbate with a glass dildo until they climax. If they cannot are to leave the Corrupted Ultimate Dildo 9000 where it is
achieve climax, this must be done for 10 minutes. After that or destroy it by shattering it again. The Corrupted Ultimate
point, they die and will respawn in Area 4. However, having Dildo 9000 has 20 Health Points. It cannot be picked up
knowledge of a Cummancer’s ability to respawn, Morgana safely, even with another object or by using Grabby Hands. If
will use that time to escape with the Corrupted Ultimate at any point the Hero touches it with anything other than a
Dildo 9000, unleashing a new powerful evil upon the world. weapon or offensive spell, its magic will take effect, and they
In the BASE version of the game, if the Hero fails the roll to must masturbate until they die again.
resist the effects of the Corrupted Ultimate Dildo 9000, they Multiple Heroes Modification: The Ultimate Dildo 9000
simply die. can only be used on one Hero at a time. For each additional
Hero in the party, increase Morgana Shadowmantle’s Health
Morgana can be seduced. Should the Hero attempt this, Points by 8.
she will say she wants to use the Ultimate Dildo 9000 on
them. This is a ploy to get them to hand the dildo over. If
they do, it will immediately become corrupted. She will,
however, still use it on them. To roleplay this, Morgana
End of Adventure Results
There are several possible conclusions to this adventure. If
(played by you) will fuck the Hero (vaginally if female,
the Hero discovered the power of the Ultimate Dildo 9000
anally if male) with the Ultimate Dildo 9000 while doing
while fighting with Morgana Shadowmantle, they might
everything you know that drives the Hero wild. This should
decide to keep it for themselves. In this case, the Ultimate
be their most favourite pleasurable things. This will continue
Dildo 9000 is their reward.
for 5 minutes. If the Hero climaxes within that time, they
If the Hero collected the shards and returned them to
die and will respawn before Morgana has a chance to escape.
Thalion Whispwood unfused, read the following boxed text:
Should the Hero not climax, Morgana will remove herself
from the situation. However, the magic will have already
taken hold of the Hero, and they will be obsessed with As you present the shards to Thalion Whispwood, his
masturbating, forgetting all other things. In this instance, slender hands reach out with a reverence reserved for the
the Hero will continue masturbating until they’ve climaxed. most sacred of relics. “You have done well, brave one. The
balance of sex magic is ever delicate, and you have returned a
If they cannot achieve climax, this must be done for 10
powerful relic to the world today.”
minutes, during which Morgana will sneak away with the
Ultimate Dildo 9000, never to be seen again. The Hero will Thalion lays the shards upon a bed of woven vines and begins
respawn in Area 5. an incantation, ancient and melodious. The air thrums with
If the Hero refuses to give Morgana the Ultimate Dildo power as the pieces of the artifact levitate, drawn together
9000, she will quickly grow angry and combat will ensue. In by an unseen force. Light emanates from each shard,
this case, remove the Corrupted Ultimate Dildo 9000 from growing brighter as they inch closer, until they are a single,
her list of attacks. blinding beacon.

With the final syllable of the incantation, the light bursts forth
in a radiant crescendo and then fades, leaving the shards
transformed. Where once there were broken pieces, there
now lies a restored dildo, whole and humming.

27
 Thalion turns to you, the Ultimate Dildo 9000 secure in his “I thank you, brave one,” Thalion says as he takes the Ultimate
hands. “The cycle of mending is complete, and for this, you Dildo 9000, his elation only barely tempered. “You have gone
have my deepest gratitude. For your valiant efforts, you may the extra mile to fuse the pieces together, and extra effort
choose one of the following rewards.” merits extra reward.”

Thalion will then allow the Hero to choose from one of For returning the fused Ultimate Dildo 9000 to him,
the rewards below: Thalion will give the Hero all three rewards above.
In parties will multiple Heroes, all Heroes will be taught
Whispering Longbow the Sticky Splooge spell. However, there will only be one
Slot: Weapon Whispering Longbow and one Scroll of Immeasurable
Type: Ranged Heartbreak. The Heroes will have to decide who gets what.
Damage: 1d8 After the Hero has either returned the pieces of the
Traits: If a creature is hidden, this longbow can sniff out its Ultimate Dildo 9000 or the relic merged and intact, the curse
hiding place and shoot through any obstacles to reach it. of Thalion’s impotence will be lifted and he will be able to be
seduced. In the XXX version of the game, he will offer to use
Sticky Splooge the Ultimate Dildo 9000 on the Hero. But first, after being
Requirements: Must be able to move hands. sexless for so long, he will request to do his favorite sexual
Type: Limited position with them (which is your favorite sex position).
Range: Ranged This will continue until Thalion is satisfied, at which point,
Description: You unleash your sexual fluids at a target, he will switch to fucking the Hero with the Ultimate Dildo
though you’re a bit dehydrated, so they’ve become quite 9000 while doing everything they find pleasurable to their
sticky. On a hit, the target takes 1d4 damage and is glued to body at the same time. To roleplay this, Thalion (played by
the ground, causing them to use their next combat action you), will fuck the Hero with a glass dildo either vaginally,
to struggle free. It will take a Normal roll of 4+ to break if the Hero is female, or anally, if the Hero is male. This will
free from the sticky splooge. If unsuccessful, they must continue until the Hero is thoroughly satisfied.
continue to use their combat action to free themselves until If Morgana was able to corrupt the Ultimate Dildo 9000
they succeed. and the Hero was forced to leave or destroy it but still
decided to return to Thalion to deliver the news, read the
Scroll of Immeasurable Heartbreak boxed text on the following page:
Requirements: Must be able to speak
Type: One-Time Use
Range: Ranged Thalion Whispwood awaits your return. You approach with
Description: You tell one target within hearing range a weight in your heart, the absence of the shards like a void
in your hands.
the worst news of their life, your voice able to speak the
target’s language for the duration of this one action. They
As you draw near, Thalion’s perceptive gaze meets yours,
immediately lose the will to live, reducing their remaining reading the story of your defeat before a word has even
Health Points by half, rounded down. been spoken.

If there is more than one Hero in the party, each Hero “The relic...” Thalion starts, his voice no more than a whisper.
must choose a different reward. In the case of parties with The question hangs in the air, unfinished but understood.
more than 3 Heroes, there is only one Whispering Longbow
and one Scroll of Immeasurable Heartbreak. Whatever With a heavy heart, you recount the tale of your quest’s
Heroes do not take these two items will be taught the Sticky unfortunate end.
Splooge spell.
Thalion listens, his expression unchanged, though the
If the Hero returned the Ultimate Dildo 9000 to
faintest shimmer of sorrow is visible in his eyes. “Then
Thalion Whispwood completely fused together, read the it is as I feared,” he finally speaks, his voice tinged with
following boxed text: grief. “The magic of the Ultimate Dildo 9000 is lost to the
world forever.”
Thalion stands before you, his figure almost ethereal,
blending with the forest itself. Turning away, Thalion Whispwood retreats, leaving you alone
to contend with the regrets of the mistakes you made during
“You have returned,” he speaks softly, his voice carrying the your adventure.
gentle rustle of leaves. “And with the relic whole once more.”
His eyes, twin pools of sage, fix upon the artifact cradling
This is the bad ending with no reward, marking the
in your hands.
conclusion of the adventure. If you are interested in
You step forward, the dildo in your grasp feeling both heavy experiencing more Lewd Dungeon Adventures, please sign
and alive. With a reverence that mirrors Thalion’s own, you up for our mailing list to know when the next campaign
offer it to him. book will be available. https://www.subscribepage.com/lewd

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Sex Acts for Hero Deaths Position: Cup
Location: On a bed
When a Hero dies, use the following chart and a d6 to Description: One partner lies on their back on a bed with
determine what act needs to be performed to resurrect them. their head hanging off the edge. The other squats over their
Unless timed or indicated otherwise, all acts must be carried partners head, cupping the back of their head to support it
out to the Deity’s satisfaction. for oral sex.
1 - Deity’s choice. The Deity will pick the sex act to be
carried out.
2 – Manual stimulation (a handjob or fingering)
for 3 minutes.
3 – Head Rush position.
4 – Oral stimulation (a blowjob or cunnilingus)
for 3 minutes.
5 – Cup position.
6 - Hero’s choice. The Hero will pick the sex act to be
carried out.

Below is a description of the Head Rush and Cup positions.

For the sake of ease, the descriptions of these sex acts were
written with a man and a woman in mind. Lesbian couples
should be able to perform all positions in this campaign
with the aid of a Feeldoe or similar sex toy. If the idea of
performing one of these sex acts makes you uncomfortable
or you are not physically able, please swap it out with
one you find more enjoyable or switch to the DRINK or
BASE version.

Position: Head Rush

Location: Against a bed
Description: The male partner stands and leans against a
wall. He picks the female partner up facing away from him
and holds her upside down while he performs oral sex on
her. This is an extremely advanced position and should not
be performed by any couple not in peak physical condition. If
you cannot perform this position, re-roll.

29
 Base Acts for Hero Deaths
Should the Hero and/or Deity be in a refractory period
and not wish to imbibe alcohol, the following acts may be
used for Hero resurrection. Use the chart below and a d6 to
determine which act needs to be performed.

1 - Deity’s choice. The Deity will pick the act to be

carried out.
2 – The Hero must profusely apologize to the Deity for
their incompetence, which caused them to die.
3 – The Hero must bring the Deity a snack. If no snacks are
available, the Hero must tell the Deity what they would bring
them if there were snacks.
4 – The Hero must draw a picture of their character facing
the monster that defeated them.
5 – The Hero must come up with a short poem about their
most recent defeat.
6 – The Hero must take three drinks of water.

Spells in This Adventure

Duplicate
Requirements: None
Type: Limited
Range: Self
Description: The caster creates a duplicate of itself.

Full Body Condom

Requirements: None.
Type: Limited
Range: Self
Description: A thin lambskin sheath forms around you.
You may trigger this when a foe attacks to reduce incoming
physical or magic damage by 5. It does not cost an action.

Sticky Splooge
Requirements: Must be able to move hands.
Type: Limited
Range: Ranged
Description: You unleash your sexual fluids at a target,
though you’re a bit dehydrated, so they’ve become quite
sticky. On a hit, the target takes 1d4 damage and is glued to
the ground, causing them to use their next combat action
to struggle free. It will take a Normal roll of 4+ to break
free from the sticky splooge. If unsuccessful, they must
continue to use their combat action to free themselves until
they succeed.

30