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Prologue

NELLY PAGE

Nelly Page Zulu, national bestselling author. That’swhat

the world knows me as. The Beloved Mashenge and
Sabatha The Begetter are my greatest achievements, my
success. I’m a psychologist by profession, but writing is
my first love. As far as the world knows, my life is perfect
and I am married to the most “amazing” man.
Bhekifa Zulu and together we have four beautiful
children, they are refreshingly smart and funny. Theyare
the reason I haven’t left this man. Our lives were perfect
until his family happened.

My journey to hell and back began a few years ago,

Bhekifa and I had good times together. But like a storm,
the devil showed up and he came to stay.
Bhekifa was a humbled being, but there were red flags
of possessiveness, and one day his desire to
control became dark after lies from his family
circulated. Tainting my name and image in the eyesof the
man who once looked at me like I was the only woman
ever to exist.

After twelve years of marriage, I knew something was

wrong. The man I had married, was no longer the
romantic person I had fallen in love with. The bouquets of
roses were replaced by belittling insults,manipulation and
heaps of blame. He prohibited mefrom doing anything
that he disapproved of. A senseof fear was evoked and
threats of punishments weresaid. Was I overreacting?
Was I in the wrong? Was I acting crazy? It came to that
point where I questioned myself.

One time when I walked into the bullet-ridden halls ofmy

home, I didn’t know I would meet a merciless man whose
intentions were to inflict pain and fear in me. That day he
had gone to see his mother, if only Ihad known he would
come home with the devil
strapped on his back.
His eyes told a tale of nothing but hate, after I had
refused to bow down as per his request. Bhekifa’sanger
took an unexpected turn.
“You have ruined the family name, my dignity.” Hesaid,
looking down at me after his fist threw me tothe hard
cold floor. “I told you to bow, didn’t I?”
He gripped a hold of my cheeks and told me to shutup
when I tried to practice my back chatting skills.
Bhekifa woke up the next morning with a mouth fullof
apologies and faults, faults that had my name onthem. He
blamed me for putting his hands on me, hesaid I wouldn’t
listen to him and he didn’t want the neighbours to hear us
arguing. The fist was to shut me up, with a bruised lip I
accepted the man’s apology like any battered wife would.
That was the first hit.

Bhekifa became ruthless with time and it broke myheart

that he would believe his family over me, hiswife, the
mother of his children. My children were
still young and needed their father, I couldn’t break their
family apart. Believe me, I had so many reasonsto be
selfish and walk away, but their innocent facescompelled
me to stay and fight for my marriage.
Fight for their rights to have a present father,
however the more I stayed with him, the more it
destroyed my self-esteem.
Bhekifa’s family poisoned him against me, I still believed
in him and was convinced that he wanted tochange. I
dragged him to counselling on days he wasn’t a monster,
the sun would shine in our lives, but the dark cloud lurked
in the corners of our home.

My life is a very dark tale of betrayal, lust and

revenge.

©
CHAPTER ONE

NELLY PAGE

Me: Done.
I say closing my laptop, it took me longer than expected
to type today’s chapter. My readers are very demanding,
I love them regardless. Writing on Facebook is a hobby I
enjoy, I do it during my sparetime. I love getting into
people’s minds, it’s an interesting thing to do. You would
be amazed by how readable people are and through that
I create imaginary characters in my head. The fun part
aboutthis is penning them down. ‘Ndabuko Her Yardner’
ismy current love, she’s doing great, better than
‘Ngcwethi Her Warrior’ actually.

Bhekifa: I thought you would never finish.

Bhekifa says, jumping into bed. He’s ready for bed and
wearing those boxers I hate. Bhekifa is too hairy,
I think he’s a descendant of Shembe. He has the bushy
hair and the beard to prove it, he is not thebest
looking man in the world, but he takes my breath
away. He really is not that bad, my childrenare proof
of that.
Me: What are you wearing?
I ask, he’s annoyed by the question as usual.
Bhekifa: Not again Nelly, It’s too hot today. I can’t goto
bed wearing long pants.
Same story every night, I end up winning.
Me: So I’m not allowed to get a good night’s rest? You
know how your legs irritate my skin Bhekifa andyou don’t
want to shave them.
Bhekifa: Haibo, mfazi. Men don’t shave their legs.Says
who?
Me: I beg to differ, my eyes need rest and I have a lotof
work tomorrow. I can’t sleep with your hairy legs
brushing against me.
He knows this too well.
Bhekifa: This is not what they meant when they said
umshado akuyona ijele. My wife is a bully, you should
wear the long pants and let’s see if you’ll be able to sleep
throughout the night. (Marriage is not ajail sentence.)
I expected him to say that, he’s a man after all andthey are
not as smart as they want us to think.
Bhekifa: I am not going to sleep in long pants, it’s hot.
Bhekifa clarifies, pushing back against the
headboard.
Me: Oh, so I should suffer? Aren’t you being unfair?I’m
winning this fight, I see it.
Me: No babakhe.
He loves it when I call him that, you should see thesmile on
his face.
Bhekifa: “Let’s hear the complaint.”
I know this man just mentally rolled his eyes at me.
Me: You promised to be my protector, right? So youhave to
protect me from the heatwave and make
sure I sleep like a queen.
My dramatics come out to play. He accepts the kissI plant
on his cheek with a smile.
Bhekifa: Why did I marry a writer? Fine, I’m going to
change, but first I want some good loving.

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I’m wrapped in his arms, giggling like an idiot. I hate it

when he kisses my neck, Bhekifa always seems todo the
opposite of what I expect from him.
Me: Not there Bhekifa.
I whine, shutting the curve of my neck with my
shoulder.
Bhekifa: Eish Nelly, must you ruin the mood again? He
grunts and he’s right. This is a norm I am used to,neck
kisses put me off.
Me: You know I hate that.
Bhekifa: Yeah. What else don’t you hate?
He whispers silently, this man I’m married to is quickto
annoyance.
Me: Why did you stop?
I want him to continue. Bhekifa shifts when I try to touch
him, the man is too short tempered for my liking. Sometimes
I wonder how I fell in love with him,yet I can’t imagine my
life without him. The sound ofhis phone ringing takes his
attention away from me.
Me: Who is it?
I think I have an idea, the only person who calls myhusband
at this time of the night.
Bhekifa: My mother.
He answers, bringing the phone to his ear. Bhekifa knows
I hate it when he answers her calls during ourtime. You
would think the old woman has cameras installed in this
room and the second my husband starts touching me, his
phone rings. Old people should be sleeping at this time.
The only reason she’s still awake is to irritate me, I just
know it. I let him leave the room, that’s right, he doesn’t
speak toher with me present. I have a feeling I am the
main topic of those conversations.

CHERYL ZIKHALI
What I hate more than taking two taxis to work is traffic,
every day I spend about two hours commuting from the
south to the north where my job is located. I hate that
place too, I hate my life, I hate everything and everyone.
Yes, you guessed it. Iam miserable.
The only thing that keeps me going are my two children,
or else I would have given up on everything.They are the
reason I settled for that lousy job. No one looks forward
to cleaning toilets and offices every day, I work for the
biggest engineering company in South Africa and that
means I am surrounded by snobs who walk with their
noses heldhigh and use them to speak English. You should
seethem with their shiny suits, polished shoes. Rich
people think the world belongs to them.

Life was not always miserable for me, I was loved byan
incredible man. He was everything I had ever asked for,
we had two babies together and life was a
bliss. Fate though cast an evil eye on my life, like a
jealous neighbour, it took my husband from me. Heleft
home one morning and never came back, a caraccident
claimed his life. I was left to raise my children alone, with
no money coming in. I saw thatas a punishment for being
a housewife.

I had to start everything from scratch, job hauntingand

transferring my kids from private schools to public
schools.

Me: “Pinky, I’m cleaning this floor today.”

I announce to my colleague, pushing the bucket down the
hall. The third floor doesn’t have a lot of offices which
lessens my work, I’ll be done by lunch time. There is
another reason why I choose this floor,the office at the far
end corner. I walk in and Mr.
Zulu’s fragrance greets me. He is the reason I’m
always lurking around the third floor, everything inhere
is so manly. From the big picture of Bafana Bafana on
the wall to the old brown leather couch
near the window. I walk around admiring the place and
possibly dreaming of a life with him where I bring him
lunch to work. Sitting on his chair makes itfeel so real.
“Having fun?”
He’s here, Cheryl you’re in trouble. Slowly I stand andfix
myself before turning to face him. He’s leaning onthe door
post with his arms across his chest.
Me: I’m sorry, I was cleaning.
Mr. Zulu: The chair?
Me: Yes, it had gathered dust and I thought-
Mr: You thought sitting on my chair would removethe
dust.
It’s not that big of a deal.
Me: Excuse me.
I walk past him, taking quick steps.
Mr. Zulu: Hey, I didn’t say leave. I was merely askingwhy
you like sitting on my chair. Are you after my position
Ms?
Me: Even if I was, I wouldn’t qualify. So relax Mr. Zuluyour
job is safe.
He scratches the back of his head and releases alow
laugh.
Mr. Zulu: You’re a bold one, what’s your name?
Me: Cheryl.
My answer is quick.
Mr. Zulu: Cheryl, I would appreciate it if you would doyour
work and stay away from my things.
Me: With all due respect Mr. Zulu, I have no interestin
your things. There is nothing special about you.
Just like you, I am here to work and would appreciate it
if you would stay out of my way while I work. Your salary
might be bigger than mine, but atthe end of the day we’re
both trying to make a living.
My mouth has a life of its own, it will surely get meinto
trouble one day. Mr. Zulu laughs with his eyesand his
lips dance to the sound of my words.
Mr. Zulu: You really are bold Cheryl.
Me: I am merely standing up for myself sir, excuse
me, I have toilets to clean.
I grab my bucket and walk out, crush or no crush. Noman
will disrespect me.

To be continued ©
"TWO"

NELLY PAGE.

I can’t help but smile back at my personal assistant Buhle

as I walk into my office building. I don’t know aday when
she’s not smiling, her smile stretches further as I approach
her desk.
Buhle: Your coffee is on the table, you have an 8o’clock.”
She hands me a newspaper and points at an elderlywhite
woman seated on the single couch in the waiting area.
Me: What’s her case?
Buhle: Another battered wife who refuses to get herhusband
locked up.
Me: Argh, and I thought I would have the morning off.
Dealing with these kind of women is depressing, itcould be
that I see myself in them.
Me: Thank you Buhle, how is your son?
Buhle is a new mother, she just came back frommaternity
leave.
Buhle: He’s beautiful and growing, I can’t get overhow
much he looks just like his father.
There is a way she glows when she speaks aboutthat
mysterious man, they are not married, but shesays she
has hope.
Me: Trust me that is the ultimate betrayal, to carry achild
for nine months and have it come out lookinglike its father.
Her smile turns into a laugh, I must have made a joke,
but I’m speaking from experience. My sons look like
their father, Ayanda is the one who pitiedme and took
my features. My baby girl is her mother’s daughter,
looks just like me.
Buhle: I don’t mind, deep down I wanted him to looklike his
father. The last thing I want is to take the father of my baby
to uTatakho for a DNA test.
That’s funny, I thought she had one man in her life.Why else
would she think of taking him to a show where two men are
fighting over a child?
Me: Let me get to work sweetie, that poor womanmust
be wondering what’s keeping me.
The smile again.
Buhle: Good luck.
She’s laughs at me, Buhle knows just how hardbeing
a psychologist is. Listening to people’s problems
can be draining sometimes.

-CHERYL ZIKHALI.

I would like to think I have a hand in this misery that’s

hovering over my life, to talk to a senior the way I did
with Mr. Zulu will get me in trouble. I mightlose this
stupid job. Where will I begin to look for another one?
This country is not kind to its citizens,with unemployment
laughing in our faces, I will be lucky to get another job in
the next ten years. I make
it to the second floor where Pinky is located, don’t befooled
by her loud singing. She hates her job just asmuch.

Me: Hey, I’ll take over from here. You go and finishup
on the third floor.
Judging by the look on her face she is not happywith me,
but I know how to get my way.
Pinky: Your favourite floor, you mean? Isn’t thatwhere
your dreams take place?
Me: Can we joke later when I have had breakfast?I’m
not in the mood right now Pinky.
Pinky: Did you let your mouth run again?
Pinky thinks I’m an inconsiderate bitter woman who does
not regard people’s feelings. Maybe I am bitter,the world
took so much from me and I can never getit back, no
matter how much I wish for it.
Me: Maybe I did, rich people want us to roll a red a
carpet for them each time they walk past. I’m not going
to do that, my husband was once a manager.
We had enough-”
Pinky: Your husband is dead Chez and it’s no one’sfault
except that drunk driver. You can’t punish everyone for
his death.
Me: Woah Pinky! When did you become a counsellor?I
think you’re better off mopping floors.
My husband is a very sensitive topic, one I would liketo
avoid whenever I can. Rolling her eyes at me, Pinky
continues with her mopping. I will have to begher now
and make a few empty promises just to have her exchange
floors with me. I’m sure Mr. Zuluwould have forgotten
about that incident by lunch time.

Me: You know Mr. Zulu is forward, he’s a handsomeforward

man.
There’s a chair in this office too, it’s not as comfortable
as the one I was seated on earlier, but itwill do. Pinky is
not happy about my laziness, I smileat her in return.
Me: He asked me not to touch his things. How am I going to
clean the office without touching his things?
Pinky: You were sitting on his chair again, weren’t
you?
Me: Is it my fault that I dream of being a CEO?
She finds my question rather funny, I should be a
comedian.
Pinky: The only thing you dream about is sitting onMr.
Zulu’s lap.
Pinky says, grabbing the bucket of water. She knowstoo
much, I should learn to keep my mouth shut or else she
will get me in trouble.
Me: Well if I won’t be a CEO, why not sit on the CEO’slap?
I said it, I should be a comedian. She is laughing
again.

-BHEKIFA ZULU.
It is said that time slows down when you’re countingthe
minutes, for me that’s not the case, it flies. I couldn’t wait
for 5pm and the moment the clock struck five, I ran out of
the office like I was never coming back. The road to
Rivonia has become so familiar that I never pay too much
attention to it when driving there after work, it’s where
my happy place is. My phone rings and the caller Id drops
my mood just a little bit, I will have to cook up stories
about my location.
Me: Mamakhe.
God knows I love my wife, life without her seems
impossible. I love how she takes care of me as her man
and has given me my rightful place in her life and our
children’s lives. I’m not perfect and I’ve hurt my wife
countless times. Although the sweetest person I have ever
known, Nelly’s insecurities force her along the paths of
stubbornness and lead me toact and raise a hand on her,
only to wake up the nextday with regrets.
Nelly: Dinner at our favourite restaurant at 8pm, I
already made reservations.
I’m not really a last minute guy and my wife knowsthis
too well, yet she goes and does things that pissme off.
Me: You should’ve told me this morning Nelly, I’m
going to see my mother right now and you know Ican’t
cancel.
Lies are easy to tell when you have years of
experience.
Nelly: Oh, okay. What is it that you do with your mother
every Thursday night Bhekifa? You should behome with
your family.
This is from the woman who wants us to go out to dinner
and leave the kids at home. I don’t know whatshe wants
from me.
Me: Being married doesn’t mean I have to turn myback
on my mother.
Nelly: Yes I know that, but your wife and kids shouldcome
first.
I don’t believe in women raising their voices at men.
Me: What will I do when I get home? The children
hardly notice that I am there, with those gadgets they
have I doubt my presence is needed.
Nelly: I know baba, but am I wrong for asking my
husband to avail himself for his family?
I think I should end this call before both of us end upsaying
things we will regret.
Me: Don’t dish up for me, I’ll eat at my mother’shouse
and don’t wait up please.
I hear her sigh over the phone.
Nelly: Okay, I love you.
Me: Yeah me too.
I hang up before she speaks further, my phone beeps
instantly. It’s a text that puts a smile on myface.
‘Radisson Blu Hotel, room 105. Just in case you have
forgotten your way. Hurry Mageba, I’m getting impatient.’
-SABELO ZULU.

“Wena Sabelo.”
This is what happens when you live in your mother’shouse
with your wife and kids. She nags and nags, I can’t do
anything right in Mariam Zulu’s eyes.
Bhekifa is the golden boy, only because he brings money
into the house. It’s his job as the big brother, Ican’t be out
there sweating and hard at work when Ihave a big brother
whose bank account is overflowing. Bhekifa has so much
money that he doesn’t know what to do with it. If it were
up to me, everyone in this house would move into
Bhekifa’s house. It’s big enough to accommodate all of us,
buthis wife will never allow it. That woman wants control
over my brother’s money, if she would have itshe would
make him turn his back on us.

Me: What did I do now mama?

I sit up from the couch, she doesn’t like it when I putmy feet
on her couch.
Mariam: Did you see what your son did to my garden?This
again?
Me: He’s just a boy mama, I will fix your garden firstthing
in the morning.

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Mariam: That’s what you said about the light in the

bathroom, one week Sabelo, one week we’ve been
bathing in the dark.
Me: Huh mama, candles give light. Maybe there’s
something wrong with your vision.
The click of her tongue tells me that I have offendedher, I
shift to the side as she sits next to me.
Mariam: When will you grow up my son? Look at
your brother, he has done well for himself.
I live to hear her sing this song, she is forevercomparing me
to the “almighty” Bhekifa.
Me: Look magriza, not now. No, skai chunna daai ding.
Bhekifa is a cheese boy and I’m just a guy fromekasi. Life
is only fair to those who are smart. He
took all the brains and made a life for himself, I willsit
here on the couch and eat all the cheese my brother
brings home. (Don’t do that.)
Mariam: You should be ashamed of yourself Sabelo.
My mother might act annoyed, but I know deep down
she is all smiles. I am her last born and thishouse will be
mine when she dies. So, what is thepoint of leaving if I
will come back one day?
Mariam: Tell me, did Bhekifa send you money today?
Me: Three thousand imagine, your son is becomingstingy
mama. What will I do with three thousand rands?
Mariam: It’s that wife of his, wait till he gets here,tomorrow.
I will sort him out.
Sabelo: No leave Bhekifa to me, I know how to sorthim
out.
Mariam: I hope you’re not talking about that uselessgirl, she
couldn’t separate them.
My mother is right, I fail to understand how Bhekifacan be
in love with Nelly. He can do better than that
woman, it seems like she rubbed off her stupidity onhim.
Me: This calls for a family meeting then.
My announcement puts a smile on her face, Bhekifanever
misses family meetings. He will be dancing toour tune if
we play the cards right.

To be continued©
“THREE”

CHERYL ZIKHALI.

Me: Short left.

I shout to the taxi driver after he takes a turn at Sasol
garage, what I love about Ormonde View is that it’s not
crowded. I moved back to my mother’s house a year after
my husband died, things were so bad after his death. I
lost my house because I couldn’t pay the mortgage, Zain
was careless with money. Most of it was spent
investigating paranormal activities, we both had a
passion for it and that’s how we grew closer and fell in
love alongthe way. We had kids and my priorities
changed, while his remained the same. His obsession for
ghosts never died, I became a mother and had to putmy
kids first.
We didn’t have life insurance, how careless that was of us.
I want the best for my kids and one day I will find them a
father who will give them everything they
deserve.

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My mother always waits for me at the door, it’s strange

because I am not a child anymore, but this woman
worries so much about me. It’s always beenlike this ever
since I can remember. She is my rock and takes care of
my children like they are her own.
Me: Really?
I say, smiling as she frowns upon my arrival, my mother
was blessed with twin girls. Whoever said twins should
have similar names was probably drunk that day, Beryl is
doing well with her life while Ifind myself at my mother’s
doorstep every day afterwork. There are days when I feel
like giving up and maybe follow Zain, but that would be
selfish of me, my babies need me.

Mom: You’re late, are you okay?

I don’t mind her worrying about me, but she shouldtake it
down a notch.
Me: I’m fine mama, there was traffic as usual.
There’s this smile on my face and I don’t know where it’s
coming from, but I’ve always been the smiling twin. It
annoys me sometimes because I smile at anyone,
considering I’m familiar with them.Funny enough I
continue with it even when it’s not returned. I need to
have that checked.
Mama: Jabu is here.
Yeah, I saw his car outside. I am not in the mood forhim, I
think he went crazy after Zain’s death. They were more like
brothers than friends, he always goeson about how Zain was
killed by a ghost.
Me: Where are my brats?
She finally smiles at me.
Mama: My grandkids are sleeping.
She emphasises on the word grandkids, moving to the
living room I find Jabu watching Ghosts of
Shepherdstown on the discovery channel. I hate thisshow
because Nick Groff looks just like Zain, he reminds me so
much of him. My heart breaks a little
as his face appears on the TV screen, I turn my eyesback
to Jabu who has not seen me. The seams of his lips are
caught between the glass of orange juiceon his hand and
his eyes are glued on the stupid show.
Jabu: Hey, why did you do that?He
complains as I switch it off.
Me: You know how I feel about that show.
Jabu: Yeah, but I need to watch it. Somehow I feelcloser to
Zain.
Me: Why are you here so late at night? I hope you’re not
sleeping over, we only have two bedrooms and my
mother’s couch is not for not tall men to sleep on.
Jabu: Hahaha, funny.
His voice lacks humour, he is still sipping on the juice like
he’s been working in the sun the whole day.
Jabu: I came to see the kids, I missed them.Me:
Okay, and you decided to wait for me?
Jabu: Actually, there’s a new show I’m producing and
I’ll be the host. So I need a partner and I thought, whynot
you?
Me: Why me?
He shifts as I find a place to sit next to him.
Jabu: You’re experienced Cheryl, the show is called
Paranormal lockdown.
Me: I want nothing to do with ghosts Jabu, you knowthat,
ever since Zain died I can’t bring myself to think about
them.
Jabu: That’s the thing, I think he’s trying to reach out.
Had it been three years ago, I would be jumping on the
chair with excitement, but now all I can offer thisman is a
scornful laugh.
Me: Don’t do that, don’t give me hope. If Zain was alost
soul I would know, he crossed over, we will never hear
from him again.
Jabu: How do you know? Look this is a great way tomake
money, it’s better that job you hate so much.
Me: That job keeps my children safe, I know how
dangerous this paranormal thing can be and I don’t
want them exposed to it.
Jabu: But Cheryl-”
Me: Nee man Jabu, wag ‘n bietjie toe. (Wait a bit.)He
clears his throat and nods, defeated.
Me: Just so you know, my mother is listening in on us and
that woman is afraid of anything. Trust me when I say
she’s not going to catch any sleep tonight,just the mention
of the word ghost and her mind goes places.
He laughs, he knows this fact.

-NELLY PAGE.

Bhekifa said not to wait up, it’s past twelve am and he is

not home yet. How do I sleep when I have no idea where
my husband is? This is not what I signedup for when I
made my wedding vows, late nights waiting for a grown
man to come home. The least hecould do is call me and
update me of his whereabouts, Bhekifa can be insensitive
when he
wants to.

I see the car headlights bursting through the window,he’s

here. I move to the door and open it, I want to hear his
excuse. It’s impossible that he was at his mother’s house
until this late at night. Miriam is old,her body gives up on
her around 10pm and that drunkard brother of his is not
someone he would hang out with till this late at night.
What would they possibly be talking about? I have heard
things that come out of Sabelo’s mouth, maybe a ten year
old would hold a conversation withhim. He is not the
smartest person to ever walk the face of the earth.

Bhekifa is doing the walk of shame down the pave way, his
eyes meet mine and he immediately drops them. This is a
form of a man who has something tohide, my mind is
entertaining the worst.
Me: Where have you been?
My voice cracks as he passes me and a whiff of a female
scent hits my noise, don’t cry Nelly. He will draw strength
from your tears, he loves the weak you. I scold myself
mentally. Bhekifa has gone to thebedroom without giving
me a second look, I follow after him after closing the
door.

Bhekifa: I told you not to wait up.

He says when I walk into our bedroom, he’s strippingoff his
tie.
Me: How is your mother?
He looks at me confused for a second, the
expression doesn’t last on his face.
Bhekifa: She’s fine, they are all fine. Me:
Were they sleeping when you left?I know
where I’m going with this.
Bhekifa: What’s with the questions?
Me: I’m allowed to ask about my in-laws, right?
I notice a red lipstick stain on the collar of his whiteshirt,
I have to take a closer look. He stops movingand frowns
at me when he sees me zooming in on him.
Bhekifa: What is it?
Me: What’s that on your shirt Bhekifa?
Bhekifa: Don’t start Nelly please, I had a long day andI’m
tired.
Me: Bhekifa, what is that thing on your shirt?
I am not letting this go until he tells me where he’sbeen
the whole night.
Bhekifa: Is this what I come home to after a long dayat
work? A nagging woman who keeps track of my
whereabouts? Please give me a break.
You know he’s guilty when he becomes defensive.
Me: Are you cheating on me, Bhekifa? Is thereanother
woman?
Bhekifa: Gosh Nelly! Will you stop? Just stop it, okay?My
cousin was at the house, you know how she is with her
thick make up and all. She must have
smudged my shirt when she hugged me.
I am defeated by this man’s lies, his eyes follow mewhen
I sit on the bed. I don’t want to cry, but tears are here.
Bhekifa: Are you serious? You’re crying?
Me: I can’t live like this Bhekifa, you continue to break
me and show no remorse at all. I am humantoo, I have
a heart and you’re trampling on it.
Bhekifa: Argh. Women are so dramatic, I told you that my
cousin hugged me. Now it’s up to you if youbelieve me or
not.
Me: Well I don’t, I don’t believe you. You’re nothing but
a liar, I’m the naïve understanding wife who always
pardons your mistakes and you tend to takeadvantage of
that. What if I want out? What I want a
-”

He doesn’t let me finish as he grabs my arms and pushes

me down on the bed, his knee presses downon my stomach.
There is anger in his eyes and
possessiveness. It’s a familiar look, I thought I wouldnever
see again.
Me: You’re hurting me.
I try to keep my voice as low as I can, the last thing Iwant is
my kids witnessing their father’s rage.
Bhekifa: I want you to get that thought out of your head
mamakhe, you’re not going anywhere. You are mine Nelly
and no one will ever have any claim on you. Till death do
us part, remember dali, that’s whatwe promised each
other.
With these cold words, he kisses my cheek and
finally lets me go.
Bhekifa: Now go to sleep, it’s late. I’m going to take a
shower.
My eyes follow his steps to the bathroom, could I beseeing
things? Are my insecurities playing tricks withme? He
could be right about his cousin.

-SABELO ZULU.
“Yes, yes, yes magriza.”
My mother clicks her tongue at my happiness, shewoke up
early today to prepare breakfast for her trophy son. He said
he will pass by before going towork, it must be nice being a
boss.
Me: The food smells nice mama, you still got it hey.
I say, reaching for a sausage on the plate. She slapsmy hand
and pushes the plate away.
Me: And then?
Mariam: That’s your brother’s plate.Me:
Where is mine?
She points at a plate with one sausage and probablya
table spoon of scrambled eggs.
Me: Why does he get three pieces and I get one? This
favouritism of yours magriza? No, I don’t like itman.
She takes a plate to cover Bhekifa’s food.
Miriam: If I had favourites you and that lazy wife of yours
would be living in a shack somewhere in Alex.
Me: Must you be like this mama? Your words cut sodeep.
Mariam: I don’t care, listen to me, Sabelo. I’m going to
bath before Bhekifa arrives, no one must touch his food.
Tell your wife as well, that’s if she decidesto wake up
today. Do not touch your brother’s plate.
That was an order, I am tempted to take one piece of
sausage when she walks out of the kitchen. But thenagain,
the old lady has spoken.

To be continued©
“FOUR”

BHEKIFA ZULU.

My brother is the one to open the gate for me, he waves

and smiles when I drive in. My mother called me for an
emergency meeting, Nelly has no knowledge of it. We are
not on speaking terms sincelast night’s drama, sometimes
I think she forgets how much I love her and focuses on
non-factors thatwill only destroy our marriage. Her
insecurity is not attractive at all, however I messed up last
night and Iwill have to make it up to her.

Sabelo: “Ingagara, the man amongst men, the bread

winner. Bhekifa Zulu, my brother.
I’m familiar with this smile on Sabelo’s face, he is ina
good mood.
Me: “So early in the morning Sabelo? What are youhappy
about?”
Sabelo: “I’m only celebrating my brother, we don’tneed
an occasion for that.”
Me: “How are you doing?”
He replies with a smile and leads me inside the house, we
enter through the kitchen entrance. The aroma of my
mother’s cooking makes my heart dance, I am yet to meet a
woman who cooks like her.
Me: “Where is mama?”
Sabelo: “In the dining room, we’ve been waiting foryou.”
My mother’s face brightens up when I walk throughthe
door, she greets me with a hug and a kiss on thecheek.
Mom: “My baby, look at you. You’re so skinny, that
woman is not feeding you.” Her hatred for Nelly is not a
secret, I have come to accept it, but I still see aneed to
defend the woman I love.
Me: “That woman has a name mama and she is my
wife.”
She waves me off with her hand, taking back her
seat on the dining table.
Mom: “Hai suka, I hope you didn’t spoil your appetite,I
made breakfast.”
Me: “You know me, I will never miss a chance to eatyour
food.”
Sabelo walks out for a second and comes back witha
bottle of beer.
Me: "I can’t drink bafo, I have to go to work."
Sabelo: “Trust me, you will need a drink after you seewhat
we have for you.”
He says, pushing the now open bottle my way. What could
he possibly tell me that will require me to drink?
Mom: “You’re a good man Bhekifa, you deserve toknow the
truth about your wife.”
Me: “What Truth?”
Sabelo slides a white envelop across the table, theserious
expression on his face worries me.
Me: "Won’t you let me finish eating first? I’ll check itout
once I’m done.”
Sabelo: “This can’t wait, open it.”
I push the half eaten plate aside to accommodate my
mother and brother. The envelope contains pictures of my
wife with another man, they are out inrestaurants. I’m not
really certain of what this couldmean, my gaze finds my
mother’s concerned face.
Me: “What is this?”
Mom: “Your wife is having an affair Bhekifa, look at
those pictures. She has been meeting up with thisguy for
some time now.”
No, not my Nelly. That woman respects me, sheworships the
ground I walk on.
Me: “Where did you get these pictures?”
Her gaze finds Sabelo, my brother moves uncomfortably on
the chair, he’s getting ready toexplain.
Sabelo: “I didn’t want to believe it at first, my wife saw
them two weeks ago. I wanted to slap her whenshe told
me about it, thinking how dare she accuse my brother’s
wife of a terrible thing. To prove her
wrong, I decided to have someone look into thatman.
These are the results Bhekifa, your wife ishaving an
affair.”
I hear Sabelo, I really do, but my heart is telling me
something else. Nelly is so innocent and naïve, shewould
never look at another man. Doubt builds upinside me,
looking at these pictures. My wife with another man while
she preaches about me cominghome late?
Me: “No, this cannot be true. Mama, I know my wife.She
would never do this to me, Nelly would never hurt me like
this.”
I get up in a fit of rage, part of me says go find Nellyand
confront of her, another part says find this manand make
him regret setting his eyes on what is mine.
Sabelo: “She did bafo, she has been going behindyour
back. You can confront her if you like.”
Mom: “You know we want the best for you my sonand
Nelly is not, she will destroy you.”
Me: “She is going to pay for this, they both will. Nelly
has made a mockery out of me, this is a disgrace.”
I introduced Nelly to my parents as the woman I wanted
to spend my life with and this is how she embarrasses
me, she tarnishes my image. How willmy mother and
brother look at me now?

-NELLY PAGE.

Sabatha The Begetter is selling like hot cakes on awinter

morning.
Me: “Wow Buhle, I didn’t think the book sells werethis
great. Come mid-year and we’ll be sold out.”
I tell my personal assistant, while going through themonthly
figures of my book sells. Buhle leans in tohave a closer
look, she smiles as I hand her the file.
Buhle: “I’m not surprised, your first novel was a hit.This
one is bound to leave a mark, it’s all over the news,
radio, TV, social media. Sabatha is knockingHlomu
right off the park.”
She says with so much excitement playing in her
voice.
Me: “You know this is not a competition, right?”
Moving to take a sit which is something I never allow,Buhle
gives me a faint smile and ignores my questioning eyes.
Buhle: “Did Shakespeare tell you this? Life is all about
competition Nelly, we’re all racing somewhereand
desperate to be the first one to cross the finish line. In all
areas of life, nothing comes easy and when something is
presented to you on a silver platter you grab it and make
sure no one steals it from you even if it belongs to
someone else.”
Me: “I don’t understand your theory Buhle, you can’ttake
something that belongs to some else. That is theft and I
can’t accept that.”
Buhle is still young, she wouldn’t understand how this life
thing works. Her statement doesn’t sit wellwith me, it
reminds me of my husband and how he finds comfort in
the arms of another woman when Iam here. It pains me to
know that there is a womanout there who is ready to
destroy another woman’s
life. We should be looking out for each other, but allwe
do is snatch and snatch and snatch.
Buhle: “I can, life is not kind to anyone Nelly. The
good girl attitude will not take you anywhere. Okay,let’s
say your husband is-”
Me: “Stop right there, my husband is off topic Buhle.”
I cut in a little harshly, Buhle knows her limits, yet has a
tendency of crossing them. I don’t bring mypersonal life
to work same as befriending my employees. That is one
mistake I will never make.
Buhle: “I’m sorry, I wanted to make an example.”
Her apology is not genuine, it lacks compassion. I’mtaken
aback as she sits back on the chair and foldsher arms
across her chest, I notice how she badly wants to roll her
eyes at me. My position does not allow her the chance to do
so.
Me: “I think it’s time you went back to work, we’redone
here.”
Buhle: “Yes ma’am.”
I decide to ignore her little attitude as she walks out
like this is her mother’s company.

-CHERYL ZIKHALI.

I didn’t rush to work just to find Pumla Sekhute cleaning

Mr. Zulu’s office, this woman thinks we’re incompetition. I
can’t stand her really, life was better when she was on
leave.
Me: “Pumla baby, hoe gaan dit?”
She gives me her famous fake smile, it doesn’tbother me
like she wants it to.
Pumla: “Hi.”
Ouch! I felt that sting.
Me: “Well since you were on leave and are not
informed, this is my spot darling.”
Pumla: “I’ve been cleaning this floor before youcame to
work for this company and-”
Me: “And now I’m cleaning it, we move with the
times sis.”
I have officially annoyed a grown woman, I accept the
tongue click she gives me while pushing my cleaning
equipment where I can access them easily.
Pumla: What is your story Cheryl?
Me: “Explain.”
I say, paying her no attention. I won’t be safe if Pumla
finds out about this deep liking I have for the company
CEO. ‘You’re aiming too high my child, youneed to lower
your standards and find yourself a man who will love you
for you and not what you cangive him in exchange for his
money.’ These are the words of my dear mother, she
discreetly called me aprostitute. Lower my standards, she
said. That is something I will never do, if I can’t get myself
a whitehusband. Why not a rich black man?
Pumla: “You seem to be obsessed with cleaning this
office.”
Me: “Not really sweetie, this is like church. You knowhow
you have your favourite seat at church and every Sunday
on your way there, you pray to God thataunt Dora and her
bunch have not taken your space.”
I’m causing confusion. Pumla:
“What do you mean?”
Me: “Don’t worry, you’ll get it after lunch.”
Pumla: “You really are a piece of work, you know
that?”
Me: “I’ll take that as a yes, you can clean the firstfloor,
there is no one there.”
I just love it when women understand each other. I can’t say
the same for Pumla, she is frowning at me.
Me: “Tell you what, Saturday you can have this roomall
to yourself. Deal?”
Pumla rejects me with a tongue click and a deepsigh
is her exit.
“You need to get that mouth of yours checked.”
Mr. Zulu’s voice startles me, he is here a bit early. I hoped
that I would be halfway done before he got here. I turn and
find him frowning down at me, handshidden in the pockets
of his trousers.
Mr. Zulu: “It will get you into trouble.”
He finishes, raising an eyebrow. He wants to
intimidate me with that expression, but I am not
moved.
Me: “Where you eavesdropping?”
Mr. Zulu: “This is my office, so no I wasn’t.”
Yeah, sure he wasn’t. He blinks at me before tightening
his facial features, his eyes narrow as heintently fixes
them on me. It’s bad enough that I dream of this man,
how do I maintain self-control when he looks at me like
that? Let’s not get it twisted, there is no love in his eyes,
only judgementand what I would call disgust.
Me: “Okay if Mr. Zulu doesn’t mind, this cleaner would
like to finish her work before the office is occupied. I
don’t work well under pressure and with that look you’re
giving me, I might just rush and missa spot.”
A slow nod takes over his head and he chuckles
coldly.
Mr. Zulu: “Remind me why you’re still working here?”
Me: “I’m good at what I do, although it doesn’t giveme
six figures at the end of the month.”
This time he laughs, it’s a real one. I take in how hiseyes
light up as his mouth stretches further, he is alooker, I’d
give him that.
Mr. Zulu: “I will give you space then, you may
continue madam cleaner.”
He leaves me with an insult and the sound of hissoft
laughter as he walks out of the office.

To be continued©
“FIVE”

SABELO ZULU.

I didn’t think Bhekifa would actually believe us, my

brother can be as naïve as his wife at times. She knows
how to crawl under him and control him like apuppet,
that’s why we’re now getting R3000 and notR7000. I will
have the old Bhekifa back, the one whospoiled us rotten
before he met that cursed wife of his. Mariam is
comfortably lying on the couch she constantly complains
about, wait till she dies, I will have this house all to
myself.

Me: “Mama you deserve a trophy for that show you did
there, you see Harriet Khoza has nothing on you.”
My words make her happy, the smile on her face is
enough for me to know that. A now victorious smile
playing on her mouth, she sits up, making space forme to
settle down.
Mariam: “Nelly will know that Bhekifa is my son, shehas no
control over him. I breastfed that boy.”
She says, gripping her breast with a deep frown onher
face.
Mariam: “I raised him to be the man he is today and he
thinks he can take an educated woman and showoff like
you can’t do better? Never, I will never allow itSabelo.”
This is shocking, this woman just laid down her
thoughts.
Me: “Magriza, this is why I love you.”
Mariam: “Suka, nawe you just had to be the uselessson.
You and Bhekifa are the same, look at the women you
married. All Rose does is eat, sleep andfinish my water
bathing twice a day. I won’t mentionthe number of times
she flushes the toilet, water is expensive man Sabelo.”
Me: “Hau mama, your son was lucky to find a beautiful
woman like Rose. She makes me lookgood in public.”
I clap back and frown at her laughing at my remark.
Mariam: “The woman is lazy, unemployed and hardly
takes care of the children. What good is she to you?”
She wouldn’t understand.
Mariam: “I don’t like that woman for you son, but notas
much as I hate Nelly. Argh, that skinny woman makes my
insides turn. If only Bhekifa had listened to me and
married Charity, she was perfect for him. A girl from the
farm, humbled, she would have madethe perfect
housewife. Charity would have been easyto manipulate,
she is not educated after all and through her it was going
to be easy to control Bhekifa.”
Me: “You’re like a leopard mama, the way you
change your spots.”
Mariam: “You mean a chameleon?”
Me: “Same difference.”
Mariam: “You’re stupid my boy, very stupid. Why didyou
drop out of school?”
Me: “School was not for me, but I’m doing great. Life
is good mama, with Bhekifa everything is smooth.” My
mother snorts while shaking her head in defeat.
Mariam: “Soon we are going to have Bhekifa fullyunder
our control.”
I love the sound of that… my mother ladies and
gentleman, stick with her and you will never go
wrong in life.

-BHEKIFA ZULU.

My mind is not at work today, the pictures of Nelly and

the man she is supposedly having an affair withare
plastered on my office table. Rage bubbles inside me
each time my eyes fall on them. I want toconfront her,
God knows I do. The problem is that I don’t have my
facts straight, I find it hard to believethat this man frozen
in these photographs is sleeping with my wife.
I take up the offer to call her as the urge pushes me,if this
is true then she could be with him at this
moment.

“Bhekifa?” Her voice portrays doubt, at least she still

answers my calls at second ring. If she were with him, it
wouldn’t be so.
Me: “Where are you?”
I sound a bit possessive, but that’s alright, I have every
right to be. Nelly is my wife and belongs to mealone.
Nelly: “Work.”
That’s all she offers, she is still upset with me.Me:
“What time will you be home Nelly?”
Nelly: “Same time as always.”
All her replies are cold and followed by a heavy silence,
one that comes to play when we have problems in our
marriage. Pride happens to play a major in our marital life,
Nelly being the kind heartedperson she is, usually offers
apologies first while I’mstill nursing my ego.
Me: “And what time is that?”
I snap, thinking of what my mother and Sabelo said. Idoubt
I will be getting over it anytime soon, I need tofind out the
truth.
Nelly: “You know what time I get home every day, itnever
changes Bhekifa.”
Me: “Good, it better not change. Don’t forget that
you’re a married woman Nelly, characterlessness
should not have a place in your life. Your job is to love
me, satisfy me and take care of our children. You
shouldn’t depend on the school to raise your kids for
you, they are still young and need their mother. In fact,
I think you should quit your job andbe a full time mom.”
I have to keep the phone an inch away from my earwhen
her loud laugh resounds over the mobile phone.
Nelly: “I didn’t know they teach comedy at work, wowthat
was funny hubby.”
I take this as an insult.
Me: “If you only knew how serious I am, you wouldn’tbe
filling my ears with that stupid laugh of yours.”
Nelly: “Bhekifa, I am not going to be a house wife just
to please you. I don’t care what you say to me,you will
not bind me.”
Me: “You have balls now Nelly? Where do you get off
talking to me like that?”
Her giggles make me feel like an idiot, she is luckyI’m
nowhere close to her.
Nelly: “What is wrong with you? You never had a
problem with me working, where is the sudden
change coming from?”
Me: “Will you question my authority? I am the head of
the house and when I say quit your job, you do it.No
questions asked, respect me Nelly, I am your husband.”
Nelly: “Exactly, you’re my husband not my dictator. Iam
not going to quit my job because your ego screams for
attention. I will not bow down to you Bhekifa, not in this
lifetime.”
Me: “We’ll see about that.”
She breaths at my response, I hear her laughing softly,
a scornful laugh that brings anger knockingand I am
tempted to let it out.
Nelly: “Yeah, don’t bet on it. Housewife my foot.”With
this insult, she drops the call on me.

-CHERYL ZIKHALI.

I clench my fist and grit my teeth at the available balance

on my Capitec account… R0.16. I can’t live like this
forever, money doesn’t love me. It comes but hardly stays,
here I am with an overdrawn account. I lose my appetite
at the sight of the brownbread and jam staring up at me
from my lunch box.Annoyed and with no hope for the
future, I close it and push it away.

“You know that’s better than not having food?”

Pinky says, walking into the staff kitchen and sits down
next to me. We take our lunch break around three, only
because we knock off at four and that gives us time to
cool off before rushing to wrestle with a crowd at the taxi
rank. Funny how people fightto be the first to get in the
taxi, I need to buy a bus tag. Taking two taxis is actually
costing me a lot, half of my wages is spent on transport
and the rest pays for school fees. This explains the
available balance in my bank account.
Me: “Says the girl who has a full fish dancing on herplate.”
She finds my reply amusing.
Pinky: “You speak funny, people don’t understand
idioms, you need to speak like a normal person. Iwould
think there is a fish literally dancing on my plate.”
Me: “Blame Zain, he was a weirdo that man.”
Pinky: “Serves you right for chasing after the otherrace,
a guy from ekasi would have been perfect foryou.”
Pinky states and I can’t see it, I don’t see it at all. Zain
was perfect for me, no one will ever take hisplace.
Me: “Yeah right, I would have confused the guy withmy
obsession for ghosts and serial killer documentaries. He
would’ve taken me to that churchwhere they shout I
receive throughout the sermon and have the pastor pray
the demons out of me.”
Pinky: “You’re crazy Chez, maybe you do need a
pastor to lay hands on you.”
I want to laugh at her statement, but my spirit is down and
so it denies me access to be a little joyful.
Me: “Not a pastor Pinky, but the dashing Mr. Zulu. Just
one touch from him and luck will smile down atme. Did
you see my bank balance? It’s screaming babe, literally
screaming for attention. I need to feedit and how else, but
through a Zulu man whose account is overflowing with
Mandela notes.”

I know, I know. I sound like a gold digger, but I swearI am

not. Every woman dreams of a good life. I could
strip for a living and not depend on any men, but youneed
rhythm for that and let’s just say my father’s side of the
family belongs back stage where no onecan see them
dancing.
Pinky: “Okay, I have no clue what you said. I’m just
going to eat my dancing fish and shut up, this Mr. Zulu
topic is very sensitive.”
She says, biting through her golden fried fish. The cat is
out of the bag, Pinky is aware of my silly crush.She was
bound to find out anyway, I can’t keep my big mouth shut.

-NELLY PAGE.

“Your husband is…”

Buhle is denied a chance to finish her announcementwhen
Bhekifa pushes past her into my office, a smileplaying on
his face and hands stashed in his pockets, I know that
posture, he is not a happy man.
Bhekifa: “I knocked off early today and thought I
should fetch my wife, I miss you dali.”
With these words I meet him halfway, he kisses mein front
of my PA which is something I am against.My personal
life should not be exposed to the staff,especially the ones
that work under me. Bhekifa turns back to Buhle who for
some reason is still standing at the door and dismisses
her with these words…
Bhekifa: “Siyabonga sisi.”
My eyes must be deceiving me, the girl rolls her eyes.
She slams the door a tad bit hard, not enough though to
give away the irritation scratching her skin.

Like someone presses the attack button, Bhekifa snatches

my neck that I gasp in shock. He pushes me back until my
legs hit the big table I use as a work station, fire fills his
eyes. It’s not a passionate type of fire, he is possessive
right now and angry ashell. His hand tightening on my
neck, Bhekifa pushesme until I’m lying flat on my back on
the table. My
hands circle around his wrist as I try to push him offof me.
Me: “Don’t do this, not here.”
My plea passes through his ears, but he doesn’theed
my cry.

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Bhekifa: “Ahhh! This is the naïve Nelly I know, I was

confused by the lioness I spoke to over the phone. Itold you
this writing of yours will one day drive youcrazy, you think
you can take one of your crazy characters and practise their
shit on me.”
He spits the words out, squeezing his hand tighteraround my
neck and depriving me of air.
Me: “What are you on about Bhekifa? I didn’t do
anything wrong, you said I should quit my job and I…I
can’t do that.”
Bhekifa: “You can’t or you won’t?”
Me: “Bhekifa!”
Bhekifa: “You refuse to obey me, Nelly because youenjoy
showcasing yourself to men out there like a prostitute. You
have no dignity or self-respect, you
shameless woman.”
His words cut deeper than a knife through a black
forest cake, I would never look at another man.
Bhekifa has always been the only one for me.
Bhekifa: “You said you won’t bow down to me, didn’tyou?”
His hand grips my hair tightly, I muffle a scream ashe
pushes me down before him. His other hand circles the
back of my neck and he presses me towards the floor
until my face touches his feet.
Bhekifa: “Now say it again mamakhe, say you willnot
bow down to me.”
He grunts with an icy tone, filled with hate and
condemnation. I squirm under his touch desperateto be
set free.
Me: “Bhekifa stop, you’re hurting me.”
My voice is commanding, it’s feminine nonethelessand
this husband of mine regards women as weaklings. It
could be that he only regards me as aweakling.
Bhekifa: “Say it Nelly, say I am the boss of you. Say it,now.”
A hushed shout jumps out of his mouth, through
gritted teeth.
Me: “No, no.”
It’s a stifled cry. If I die today, I die. I will not be
controlled by this man. My neck throbs with pain when he
releases it, his hand is soon replaced by a foot on my
neck. With force he pushes me down andI can only fight
with the little strength I have, it doesn’t do much because
my husband has me kissing his foot. Bow down to me
Nelly’ he always says and today he has demoted me from
a wife to aservant.

To be continued©
“SIX”

NELLY PAGE.

A piercing silence took over during the ride home,

Bhekifa insisted that I leave my car and travel withhim.
After what he did in the office, I didn’t have thestrength to
argue with him.
Home is not far from work, it takes about fifteen minutes
to travel and during the soundless ride myhead is
entertaining plans of leaving this man who keeps stealing
glances at me. He is a bit calm, I cansense it. The
heaviness in his demeanour is gone, he’s probably back to
the ‘sweet and kind’ Bhekifa the world is accustomed to.

Bhekifa: “Should we get something to eat? The kidswill

love pizza.”
What kid wouldn’t? I don’t provide an answer and
don’t plan on giving one anytime soon.
Bhekifa: “Okay, I’ll drive past the mall.”
He says and I couldn’t care less what he does, I amtoo
upset to talk and entertain a grown man’s moodswings.
Bhekifa notices that I’m detached, it’s enough to get him
to shut his mouth. There’s a malla few blocks away from
our house, it’s not close enough for me to walk and so I
will have to wait forhim.
Bhekifa: “Are you coming dali?”
That ‘dali’ right there is guilt eating him up, he won’tstop
asking and so I shake my head without glancing at him.
Like all dramatic men, Bhekifa sighsbefore exiting the car.
I have a good mind to requestan Uber and have it take me
home, fifteen minutes isnot an adequate amount of time
for me to pack my kids and leave. Fifteen minutes because
that’s how long it takes the staff at Romans Pizza to
prepare the food, Bhekifa would probably get home
before me.
I need to change this stupid ring tone. ‘Writings onthe
wall by Sam Smith. I heard my eleven year old
son singing to it and thought it was too deep a song for a
boy his age. I had to download it and once I heard the
flamboyant white man’s voice pierce through my phone’s
speaker, goose bumps covered my skin. The song reminded
me of Bhekifa and how our love was almost compared to
this beautiful song,this was before he became this monster
he is now.

Believe it or not, we were once happy. I was treated like a

queen by that man, he taught me how to love, showed me
a fairy tale kind of love that had me smiling to myself
when given a chance. The devil is real and I have seen
him in the form of my husband, Idon’t know how far he’s
willing to prove his existence in my life. But I will not stay
around to findout because what I have seen has terrified
the livingdaylights out of me.
Buhle is calling… Argh, I am not her friend and she
knows not to call me after office hours. If it’s aboutwork,
then tomorrow is another day.
-SABELO ZULU.

I am pretty certain that a war has broken out in my

brother’s house, Nelly will be going to bed a bruised
woman this night. I love the thought of that, this wayshe
will leave Bhekifa and that means more for us.
My mother has Rose cooking supper today, I’m notokay
with this abuse. My wife can’t cook to save anation,
people will die of food poisoning in this house.
Stepping into the kitchen I find my mother standingbeside
my wife with a wooden spoon in her hand asif Rose were
a child that needs to be thrashed in order for them to
learn. Rose steals a glance at me, Icatch her red eyes for a
second and I am not okay with this.

Me: “No magriza, no, not my wife.”

She doesn’t care, the tongue click is her response. Me:
“Mama you know Rose can’t cook, you know the
saying you can’t teach an old dog new tricks? It’s toolate
for her mama, leave her to do what she does best and that
is to look beautiful and give me more babies.”
Rose laughs at my statement, her tears have longbeen
forgotten.
Mariam: “What will you feed those kids Sabelo? Youdon’t
have a job, none of you do. All you know is saying mama,
mama, mama the whole day.”
Me: “Is that a trick question mama?”
Mariam: “Enough Sabelo, I’ve had enough of your
stupidity. If this woman falls pregnant again you willleave
my house.”
Me: “But you know it’s bound to happen, we’re a
married couple and there is no way I’m using
protection.”
Rose turns to me with a frown this time, her eyes scolding
me. I have chosen the wrong words again,didn’t I?
Rose: “That’s not something you would tell your
mother Sabelo.”
Me: “Mabhebeza, askies ntwana.”
Mariam: “How did I give birth to a son like you? I amso
unlucky.”
My mother’s complaint has no effect on me, she loves
me, I should only worry the day she stops. Mariam
commands that I attend to the knock at thedoor, this is
her house and so I do as I’m told.

Me: “Malaika?”
He shouldn’t be here, I told him never to come to myhouse.
Malaika is the only friend of mine that my mother
despises, I think it has everything to do with the fact that
he’s a traditional healer. At the age of twenty four the
man has been tied down by his ancestors, tied down
because his relationships do not last. Every girl he finds
either cheats on him or he dumps them without any
reason. He says his ancestors are protecting him from
heart break and they will bring him the right one when
the time is right.
Malaika: “I’ve been calling you. Why aren’t you takingmy
calls?”
I push with him outside and shut the door beforeMariam the
dragon spots him.
Me: “I told you, I’ll call you ntwana. You know how
magriza can be, she’s always watching me.”
Malaika: “I don’t care, this is about that girl you hiredto
seduce your brother. She didn’t use the muti properly, she
was at my house today and man her face looks horrible.”
Malaika explains urgently, I should have known how
stupid that girl is.
Me: “What happened now?”
Malaika: “Like I said, she didn’t follow proper
instructions. Either that or someone is using
something stronger on your brother.”
Now that I think about it…
Me: “Shit, I think magriza is bewitching her son aswell.”
Malaika: “Your family is messed up Sabelo, I’m gone.
Please tell that girl to stay away from me, I can’t helpher
with anything at this point. I already went againstmy
ancestors by agreeing to help you destroy your brother’s
marriage.”
He says, shaking his head. With nothing further said,
Malaika walks away, leaving me with nothing but
questions. Should I confront my mother?

-NELLY PAGE.

“Mom, mom.”
My eight year old baby girl Ayanda runs to me with the
biggest smile on her face, she is always a happychappy.
She constantly makes sure to open the doorfor me when I
come home from work.
Me: “Ahh, you’re heavier than yesterday. What isLerato
feeding you?”
She laughs, wrapping her small arms around my neck.
The hug is so refreshing that it has me smiling
through my pain.”
Lerato greats me with a smile from the living room, she has
been of great help and does a good job with taking care of
the kids while we’re at work. I can feel Bhekifa standing
behind me, at this moment I can’t stand the smell of pizza. I
think I’ll retire early for bed.
Bhekifa: “What about daddy huh? Don’t I get a hug
from my angel?”
Bhekifa’s questions shock me, since when does he regard
Ayanda in this manner? For years this man has been
singing how Ayanda is not his because shelooks less like
him. These are speculations planted in his head by his
mother and good for nothing brother. My brother
Thokozane is a sangoma and believes that Ayanda has a
spiritual gift, he saw it from the time she was a baby
hence named her Mboni. A name given to her by her
ancestors, Bhekifa hates the name and refuses to
acknowledgeher by it. So we stick to Ayanda the name he
chose, it puzzles me how he lets his family poison his
mindagainst his own daughter.
The husband is standing too close, so I place a
giggling Ayanda down and walk to meet Lerato inthe
sitting room.
Me: “Where are the boys?”
Lerato: “In their rooms doing homework, they had
sandwiches. I doubt they will stomach anything.”
Me: “Not those boys, they will eat even if there is nospace
left in their stomachs. I am yet to meet kids who love food
like those two.”
She smiles and nods her head.
Lerato: “Ayanda didn’t want to eat, she said she’ll
wait for her parents.”
Me: “Thank you Lerato, don’t come in tomorrow. I’lllet
you know when I need you.”
She nods before gathering her belongings, she regards
Bhekifa with a brief greeting on her way out.

°°°°°°°°
The boys come down for supper, like I said they eatmore
than anyone. I hardly touch my food and Bhekifa is…
well… let’s just say he could be nominated ‘Best father in
the world’ and walk homewith the award. The kids are at
their happiest right now, Ayanda has made herself
comfortable on her father’s lap and the boys are
surrounding him like he’s a Christmas present from the
north-pole. I don’twant to cry upon seeing this breath
taking moment nor do I want to change my mind.
After gathering the plates to the kitchen, I opt for aquick
shower. It’s a good thing the kids are keepingBhekifa
occupied, I wouldn’t want him to join me.

With the husband bathing, I have enough time to pack the

kid’s bags. They are sleeping, so that savesme from
answering a million questions. After making sure that
Bhekifa is still in the bathroom, I rush to the car to put the
bags and make it back in time to jump in bed. I’ll sort my
clothes out tomorrow during my lunch break.
The bed moves as he jumps in, I know it’s him, his scent
gives him away. He smells of his favourite foam bath,
floral bouquet. Not a scent I would go for,but I’m used to it
now, complaining would be of no use.
“Are you sleeping?”
I make sure to snore, he always teases me about my
snoring and says the neighbours probably have a hard
time sleeping with the noise I make.
Bhekifa: “I’m sorry Nelly, I don’t know what comes over
me. I don’t want to hurt you, I love you. I reallydon’t
know what to do with this guilt that’s suffocating me. I
wish we can be the way we were, Imiss that. I miss you
Nelly.”
His words throw me into a pool of emotions, I holdback
my tears not wanting him to hear me cry.
I feel him shift closer until his body is touching mine,the
breath from his nostrils brushes down my neck before he
presses his cold lips on it. I want to squirmas his beard
tickles my neck. Bhekifa’s arms wrap
around me and he stops moving, this is how he plans on
sleeping tonight. I should just shrug him offof me and
sleep in the guest room, anger still has me by the throat
like Bhekifa did back at the office. Idon’t think I will be
forgiving him anytime soon.

To be continued©
“SEVEN”

NELLY PAGE.

“How about you skip work today? We can go for apicnic,

I’ll cancel all my meetings.”
Bhekifa says, standing behind me and circling his arms
around my waist. His lips find my neck, he stops with just
one kiss. I guess he remembers that Iam not a fan. I
squirm and slip out of his arms, I feelhis eyes on me while
I dress for work. I won’t be going in today, my mother is
my first stop after taking the kids to school. I have to let
her know that we’re moving in with her, I wouldn’t want
to crowd her space for too long, so I plan on finding an
apartment somewhere in the west.

Bhekifa: “Mkami, ngiyak’cela. I can’t stand it whenyou’re

not talking to me.”
Bhekifa is a good smooth talker, he would talk Julius
Malema into handing over the EFF party to him. Hiseyes
are the most dangerous, if I take one glimpseinto them
while he is vulnerable. I will surely end upin bed with
him and forgetting the monster he is.
Me: “I will have to pass. I have work, clients arewaiting
for me.”
I tell him as I throw my phone and car keys in myhand
bag, mind you, I’m doing everything I can toavoid his
eyes.
Bhekifa: “You can call in sick dali, you work too hard
anyway. I want us to fix our marriage, please Nelly.”
Me: “I can’t, I’m sorry.”
I’m not sorry at all, I want to be as far away from himas I
can. He’s an angel at this moment, but the wolf still lurks
about.
Bhekifa: “Dammit Nelly, I’m trying here. Won’t youmeet
me halfway?”
What did I say about the wolf lurking about? My eyesfind
his, he is no longer vulnerable, but angry.
Me: “You see this?”
I can snap too.
Me: “This is why I don’t want to meet you halfway
Bhekifa, I don’t know you anymore. I never know
when you’ll strike and turn into that monster I sawlast
night.”
Bhekifa: “I am not a monster, I’m your husband and Ilove
you.”
Me: “No, love does hurt. At least not like this-”
Darn his phone, I would think it is jealous of us whenwe
engage in a conversation. He reaches for it without
giving it a second thought, this is where I have been
placed in my husband’s life. Second best,no matter how
far I run and cross the finish line first,I will never outrun
whoever the third person is, in ourrelationship.
Bhekifa: “What is it?”
Turning his back from me, he walks to the bathroom,
sounding annoyed with each word that rolls out of his
tongue. I’m guessing his mother is the third person at this
point, curiosity forces me to eavesdrop on the
conversation.
Bhekifa: “What do you want me to do then? I have
more pressing issues to attend to.”
That is one pissed man in there.
Bhekifa: “Leave my son out of this, I will tell herabout
him when the time is right.”
He half shouts, half whispers. Which son is he
talking about? My boys better not be in danger.
Bhekifa: “I said leave Sandile out of this, my son
doesn’t lack anything. I told you that I will take careof
him, didn’t I?”
What in the Zululand is going on? My mind works on
autopilot, I push the bathroom door open. Startled bymy
presence, Bhekifa drops his hand. He looks like alittle kid
who has been caught with his hand in a cookie jar.

-SABELO ZULU.
“Sabelo wake up.”
That’s my wife’s voice, annoying me so early in the
morning. She knows I hate being woken up.
Me: “Rose not now, I’m having a nice dream.”
Rose: “What are you dreaming about Sabelo? It
better not be other women.”
She yells, pulling the covers off of me, women can be a
pain in the neck. Her little tantrum is enough tosit me up,
she frowns at me while folding her arms across her
chest.
Me: “I’m up sthandwa sam’ talk to me.”
Rose: “There’s an ugly woman looking for you
outside.”
She delivers, giving me a suspicious look.
Me: “What? Not me ma bhebeza, I don’t even talk tougly
woman, I swear.”
Rose: “So you only talk to beautiful women Sabelo?”
Okay, this is an interrogation. I need to think of anescape,
where is Mariam when you need her?
Me: “Rose my darling, God will punish you. No one isugly
in this world, don’t let him hear you say that other people
are ugly.”
My stupidity has her rolling her eyes.
Me: “Let me see who this ugly woman is before mybeautiful
wife strangles me to death.”

I leave a peck on her cheek and run outside… my enemies

are after me. This is the proof I need, thiswoman standing
outside my mother’s gate.
Me: “What are you doing here Buhle?”
Damn, Malaika was right, she looks terrible. Rose isright to
confuse those boils on her face for ugliness,the head scarf is
not doing much in hiding the disgusting bubbles on her
face.
Buhle: “You have to help me Sabelo please, Bhekifahas
turned his back on me.”
I’m terrified of women that cry, I never know what to do
next. Walk away or slap them so they stop crying, this
gender has tears to waste.
Me: “Your problem is that you don’t listen, you were
given strict instructions ntombazane, but my brother’s
money got in your head that you forgot. Iexpected my
sister in-law out of that house beforeyour brat was
born.”
Buhle: “I know Sabelo and it’s not too late, I can still fix
this. I will have Bhekifa dancing to my tune soon, all I need
is your help. I can’t let him see me like this, he wants
nothing to do with me.”
Pathetic woman, I push the gate closed when she tries to
open it. Rose is probably peeking through thewindow and
will give me a mouthful when I get back.
Me: “I’m a married man woman, you can’t be pushingmy
gate like you’re my second wife.”
What is it with women and clicking their tongue?
Me: “I will see what I can do, now go and don’t evercome
back here. I will call you when I need you.”
Buhle: “Promise?”
Me: “Hey, this is not a drama. Promises don’t work inthe
real world, hamba Buhle, you’re crowding us. My
wife and I want to have breakfast in peace.”
Buhle: “You’re an idiot Sabelo, you better call me or Iwill
reveal everything to your brother.”
You see this is what I don’t like, threats put me in an
uncomfortable position, I end up doing things that will
bring families together on a Saturday at the cemetery. I
let her walk with this threat, let her feel powerful for now.
She won’t see me coming when Istrike.

-CHERYL ZIKHALI.

I think of missing work today, but my mother will pester

me the whole day. That woman talks even when it’s not
necessary, I am in no mood to have herup my face. I find
her in the kitchen after getting ready for another
depressing day, cleaning toilets.
“It’s 5am, why are you preparing porridge so early?
The kids won’t be awake till seven thirty.”
I tell my mother who closes the pot as I enter the
kitchen, she turns and meets the annoying smile thatalways
seems to pull at my lips. The old woman doesn’t return it,
I should address this one day or stop smiling completely.
Mom: “Sia will be up soon, she has a cold. She was
coughing the whole night. I’m surprised you didn’thear
her, I had to wake up around 2am to prepare aglass of
activated charcoal.”
Me: “I was gone mama, why didn’t you wake me up?I
would’ve done it.”
She works too hard for kids that are not her own, Iwish
I could do so much for her.
Mom: “I don’t mind you know that. Go to work, I’ll
take care of her.”
Me: “Thank you, please kiss her and Earth for me.”
I laugh at the way she shakes her head, my mother isagainst
the names me and Zain chose for our kids.
Mom: “You mean Makhosonke?”
There we go, the heavy name. I’m a victim of it aswell,
worse… her and her mother gave me a guy
name claiming it’s unisex. I’m yet to meet a femalewith
this name…
“San’bonani ek’seni.” (Good morning.)
Jabu pulls me back from my wandering mind, he
comes around a lot lately.
Mom: “Jabu, my son.”
Why is she smiling at him and calling him her son?
Me: “Just so you know mama, the brother you and your
husband gave me is enough to annoy me. I don’t need
another one, especially one who goes bythe name of
Jabu.”
Mom: “My son’ can mean a whole lot of things, likeson
in-law.”
I see what she’s hinting at, Jabu is blushing or
whatever it is men do.
Me: “Cut, cut, cut. I’d rather be married to a ghost,
this is abomination. Jabu and me? Jesus come down
and fix this.”
My mother’s thoughts definitely need spring
cleaning. Jik, Handy Andy and Jeyes Fluid, that
should be enough to leave her brain sparkling clean.Maybe
add Holy water just so those thoughts don’tcrawl back into
her brain.
Jabu: “Ouch Cheryl.”
And then this one? He knows pretty well I will neverregard
him in that manner, come hell or high waters.Jabu is far
from the man I want to see first thing I wake up in the
morning, I cringe at the thought.
Me: “Yes Jabu, ouch. I don’t see you, I don’t see you at all
my brother. It’s dark Jabs and you know what happens
when you walk in the dark? You fall and if you’re unlucky
you’ll fall into a hole. It doesn’t matterwho is holding your
hand.”
Jabu: “How about you give me a chance and I’ll
show you, I’m not as bad as you think.”
I rebuke you Satan, back to sender.
Me: “How about, never, nooit nie, soze, andizi, le ka
mohle?”
Jabu should not be entertaining these thoughts, Iwas
married to his best friend for heaven’s sake.
Mom: “I give up on you Nkosi, you will never comeright
if you continue with this path.”
Yeah, you heard right, she spilled the name out loud.A
mother for sale, anyone?
Jabu: “Like it or not I’m here to stay, your kids callme
uncle anyway.”
Me: “Yes uncle Jabu, not uncle bae. You’re in the
distance brother zone and malum’ Jabu, I don’t seeyou
moving from that seat.”
Defeated, my mother exits the kitchen with a longexhalation.
Jabu: “You’re a difficult woman Cheryl.”
I give him a smile a sister would give her brother andhe’s
familiar with it.
Me: “I’m glad we understand each other brother
Jabu.”
My new sibling follows me outside, the free ride will do
me good. I need a break from the crowded taxi rank.
Yesterday I had an altercation with some guy ina taxi who
wouldn’t stop complaining about his fifty
cents. It’s days like those I wish I hadn’t sold Zain’scar.

To be continued©
“EIGHT”

NELLY PAGE.

As sadness comes you must love yourself as a goodfriend,

treat yourself as a person you love, for then you will make
it and the tough road would have beenworth travelling
with bare soles.

Lies, lies, lies. For years I dwelt on this mantra, lived it,
ate it and hell I slept with it. Today it is darn well
laughing on my face as I watch my husband sobbingon his
knees. Don’t get it twisted, he is not crying because he’s
hurt. Men only cry when they are wrongand want women
to forgive them and if I was as naïve as I was when I first
met him, I would take himin my arms and tell him that
“It’s okay, you’re a manand men tend to stumble and fall
in between the legs of other women.”
You heard me right, this man I have loved my whole life has
confessed to having an affair with another women for three
years and if that’s not bad, they created a human together.
A whole human with legsand hands and ohh! It talks. He
followed me when I walked out of the bathroom, threatening
to leave himand trapped me in his arms, falling to his knees
wasthe only option he had left.

Me: “To what extent are you willing to break me,

Bhekifa? I have reached my breaking point, yet you
continue to push me to the limit. Has your love turned
into so much hate?”
This is where ninety nine percent of our arguments take
place. Our sacred room, where we mostly lovedthan hated
each other.
Bhefika: “Forgive me, mkami.”
Typical man messes up and asks for forgiveness. Where
have we gone wrong as women to go throughsuch? A
pastor once said a woman is equivalent to the Holy Spirit,
quiet, compassionate and forgiving.
Could it be true?
Me: “Forgive you again Bhekifa? Again?”
That’s right, I’m yelling. He taught me how to yell,
scream and throw things at him.
Me: “Tell me, where do I dig this forgiveness you askfor?"
I can’t stop shouting at him, my heart is broken. Yes my
bags are packed and I’m ready to leave this man,however
I am human. I have a heart too and dammitI love him. I
hate it, but he lives in my heart.
Me: “Why are you so evil? Who are you? What haveyou
done to my husband? You’re useless Mageba,you have
failed as a husband, a father and a son in-law. You ought
to be ashamed of yourself.”
Another norm I am accustomed to, pissing him off.It’s
too late to duck, his hand smashes on my cheekand
because I’m not big boned, the slap throws meacross the
room.
Bhekifa: “You will not talk to me like that Nelly, I amyour
husband. Respect me dammit.”
Oh yes, the so called husband loves growling like ananimal.
It gives him power.
Bhekifa: “It’s not fair that you get to talk to me likethat.”
Men and raising eyebrows, someone tell them it’snot a
sign of power. It only depicts the devil’s ruleover them,
their sick natural animalistic behaviourthat is meant to
scare us.
Me: “What is not fair is me thinking that you will ever
change.”
He doesn’t bother helping me up from the floor, I
manage all by myself, the love between us is fadingor in
his case has faded.
Me: “Dammit Bhekifa, I loved you. I gave you my all and
sold myself to you. Gosh!!! I have been an idiot, Iwas
sixteen, bloody sixteen when I fell pregnant withyou and
you promised me a good life. You have wasted my life, my
time. The only good thing that has come out of this
godforsaken marriage are my children.”
After the hard slap he gave me, I shouldn’t be
shouting at him like this, but this is me. Nelly Page Zulu,
my hobby is to yell at my husband. He gave methis hobby
and I have held on to it for as long as I can remember.
Bhefika: “They are my children too Nelly.”
This man should not be shouting at me, not after cheating
on me and producing a bastard just to spite me. This is the
only conclusion I have come up with, then again women to
him are baby making machines.Look at me, I gave him four
of them. Put my life and career on hold just to cater to his
needs.
Me: “You see, this is your problem. You’re arrogant,you
hurt me time and time and can’t even bring yourself to
apologise. I hate you Bhekifa, I hate you.”
I’m so angry that I slap him across the face a
mistake that shouldn’t have happened.

So it begins, the wrestling. Bhekifa pushes me against

the wall, I know what’s coming next. Punchafter punch
and if he wants to feel more power he will throw in a
kick. My eyes fall on the bible on the
nightstand, it’s too late to ask God to forgive me in
advance as the Holy book flies across the room. I know
it’s wrong, but I wish it could have at least hithis big
head.
My mother always taught me to respect a man. ‘Indoda
ayibekwa isandla Nelly.’ (You don’t hit a man.)Well this one,
I will fight him for as long as I can.
Today is not like all the other days, today I am tired,broken
and fed up of Bhekifa Zulu. I knew he had awandering eye,
but to actually have a baby with another woman. I can’t
forgive him for this.
Something flashes in his eyes, I don’t know what it is,but it
forces him back to humanity. Regret and shame take over
his face, he carries his hands on hishead and tears
instantly roll down his cheeks.
Bhekifa: “Ngiyaxolisa dali, I’m sorry.”
He says, helping me up from the floor. I let him andallow
him to set me on the bed.
Me: “Get out of my sight.”
He gasps in shock, as if my words are something henever
expected to hear.
Bhekifa: “Mamakhe.”
Me: “I said get out Bhekifa, go.”
The shout stops him from touching me, he takes astep
back, wipes his tears and rushes out of the bedroom.

-CHERYL ZIKHALI

Mr. Zulu hardly enters the staff kitchen, fancy seeinghim

here. I should look away right about now… Darnit, my
eyes are undisciplined. He’s coming over, I hope my big
mouth doesn’t betray me and I end up spewing things I
shouldn’t. Finally I give myself a lecture and send my
eyes to the lunch box on the table. He’s here, I’m staring
right at his big feet. I willnot be raising my eyes until he
says something, it could be that he’s here for the tea lady.
Mr. Zulu: “Can I join you?”
Smack me back to my mother’s house. What the???Instantly
I look up at him and my jaw drops, breathe
woman breathe.
Mr. Zulu: “Miss Cheryl?”
Breathe dammit!
Me: “If you’re up for a long moment of silence, thendon’t let
me stop you.”
Ahh! There we go, he doesn’t care about the warning
because he sits himself down.
Mr. Zulu: “I’m not actually… up for it I mean. I havehad
enough of those to make me lose my mind.”
Yes, but why are you here? He brought no lunch withhim,
the ring on his finger catches my attention.
There is a little sting in my heart as I am remindedthat
he is a married man, one I will never have. Zainmust be
turning in his grave, to see what has become of his wife.
Me: “Trouble in paradise?”
I don’t know why I asked him this, we’ll just blame iton
the fact that I like things. Mr. Zulu is puzzled bythe
question, he frowns as he brushes his beard.
Me: “I crossed the line, didn’t I?”
Stupid question, of course you did.
Mr. Zulu: “I see you’re married too. Who is the luckyguy?”
I guess it’s his turn to pry, the ring on my finger
keeps unwanted species away, like that other gender.Me:
“My husband is no more.”
Mr. Zulu: “I’m sorry.”
The moment suddenly becomes awkward, I have somuch
to say to this beautiful black man. His phonethough gets
in the way, he frowns at the screen andanswers
immediately.
Mr. Zulu: “Yes.”
I watch his expression change from confusion toanger
within a space of five seconds.
Mr. Zulu: “Shit! Thank you for briefing me.”
He gets up and rushes out of the kitchen without
excusing himself.

-NELLY PAGE.
Bhekifa has been the son in-law of this family for over
twelve years, my parents are very fond of him. They are
oblivious of the things he has done to me, Idon’t know why
I didn’t tell my mother. Maybe I was protecting him or my
kids, I’m not sure. Today is different though, my mother
has heard everything that man has done to me. I expect
her to say something, but the woman is seated on the
couch speechless. I wish I knew what she’s thinking, I need
to know if she’s on my side.

Me: “I can find a lodge in the meantime, I don’t wantto

crowd you with my problems ma.”
I say this, but it’s not what I want. I need to be withmy
mother, I want to feel safe and where else but here with
her.
Mom: “Don’t be ridiculous, you’re home. I just… I don’t
see why Bhekifa would do something like this.”
Is she kidding me? He hit me, the bruises on my faceare
enough proof.
Me: “Bhekifa is not as innocent as you think ma.”
Mom: “I here you Nelly, but there is always two sidesto a
story.”
Me: “And you think mine is not legit?”
Mom: “I didn’t say that, all I’m saying is that no man
would suddenly abuse his wife. There has to be a reason
why-”
That’s it, it was a mistake coming here. I saw it in hereyes
when I narrated the story, she didn’t believe me. My
mother’s ignorance sets me up on my feet.
Mom: “Where are you going?”
That is a rhetorical question, after what she said sheshould
have a good idea where my feet are leading me.
Me: “Taking my kids and getting out of here.”
Mom: “Don’t leave Nelly, must you be so stubborn?”
The tone of her voice condemns me, of all peoplemy
mother is the one to judge me.
Me: “Stubborn ma? I’m stubborn? Bhekifa is what I
say he is and he cheated on me. My husband cheated
on me and had a child with that woman.”
The thought of it makes me so angry, I could killBhekifa.
Mom: “I’m sorry baby.”
With this apology, she takes my hands into hers. Ihate
that I’m crying for him.
Me: “Why are you taking his side? You’re supposed to
be on my side ma, I’m your baby not him. He hurtme,
that man was meant to protect me.”
My mother pulls me into her arms and I lean into heras I
wrap my arms around her.
Mom: “I know, it’s okay. We’re going to fix this baby,we’re
going to fix this.”
It has to be okay.

-SABELO ZULU.

“Yahambi ‘nja, yahambi ‘nja. Yes, yes, yes, yahambi

‘nja.” (The bastard has left.)
Nelly’s departure definitely calls for a celebration.“Yey
wena Sabelo, turn that music down.”
The party pooper is home, I dance my way to my mother
and she pushes me back when I give her thebiggest hug
ever.
Mariam: “What the hell is your problem?”
She shouts, turning off the radio.
Me: “I hambile inja mama, I just got a call from my
friend saying Nelly packed her bags plus her littlebrats
and left my brother’s house.” (The bastard isgone.)
Boy, how I love a good ending. Mariam smiles uponhearing
the news, our plan worked.
Me: “We have officially driven Nelly and Bhekifa
apart.”
Mom: “Nelly, Nelly, Nelly. Look who is getting the last
laugh now? I am Mariam Zulu, angiyona into yokudlala.”
(I’m not a play toy.)
She stands with pride and victory, it has been a longtime
coming.
Me: “Now we just have to make sure that he doesn’tget back
with her, that will be like taking ten steps back.”
Mom: “Don’t worry son, it will be easier to poison him
against her now. All we needed was to build a bridge
between them and now that it’s done, there will be no
turning back. I am going to drive those twoso far apart
they will forget they ever shared a bed.”
Mariam says, her eyes filling with hatred. Hey! This
woman is evil, I thought I was bad, but Mariam Zulusits
on the throne.

To be continued©
“NINE”

NELLY PAGE.

I can recognise the sound of Bhekifa’s car and I am

certain that it’s him who just pulled up outside. I knew he
would follow me, I didn’t think it would be this soon. My
mother rushes into the kitchen with analarming
expression, I drop the dish cloth to give hermy attention.
Mom: “He’s here.”
She says softly, I rush to the living room to peek outside
the window and there he is, getting out ofthe car. He
looks decent, like a son in-law and I mean body
structure and facial expression.

Mom: “What are you going to do? Should we let himin?”

Me: “I don’t want to see him ma, please don’t.”
She shakes her head in disapproval upon hearing theknock
at the door, I can see that she wants to let himin.
Mom: “Let’s hear what he has to say, your father would do
the same Nelly. He is the son in law of thishouse, we can’t
let him stand outside.”
Me: “Then tell him to come back when baba getshome from
work, I can’t face Bhekifa ma, not nowplease.”
The head shake again, I give up, seeing that she does not
want to listen to me. I let my feet lead meback to the
kitchen, I don’t want to talk to Bhekifa.

“Sawubona ma.” (Greetings.)

I hear him say, the kitchen is so close to the livingroom
that I don’t have a hard time hearing every word.
Mom: “How are you?”
At least she doesn’t sound friendly with him. Bhekifa:
“I’m fine ma, ingabe uma uyaphila?” (How
are you?)
The respect in his tone is there, it would have mymother
thinking I lied about the man.
Mom: “Yebo mkhwenyane, come in please.” (Yesson
in-law.)
That ‘please’ gets to me, there is a long moment ofsilence.
They must be caught in awkwardness.
Mom: “Can I get you anything?”
Poison would be great.
Bhekifa: “I’m fine ma, is Nelly here? I would like tosee
her please.”
Over my dead body, I repeat, Bhekifa is pulling out allguns.
He is at his kindest and most vulnerable. I hearmy mother
clear her throat. I can only hope that sheis not going to
give me away.
Mom: “Nelly is in no space to see you,
Mkhwenyane.” (Son in-law.)
Bhekifa: “Please, I need to talk to her.”
Mom: “After what you did to her, you shouldn’t be
here. This is not how things are done ndodana.”
(Son.)
Tell him ma.
Bhekifa: “It’s nothing serious ma, it’s normal for
couples to fight. My wife and I had a disagreement,we
said things to each other we shouldn’t have andthat led
to both of us taking the violent route.”
Why is that man lying? I badly want to run in thereand
call him a liar, if only my father was here, he would
have chased him with a machete.
Mom: “That’s not what she told me.”
Bhekifa: “Whatever she told you is her side of thestory.
I’m her husband, I will never do anything tohurt her.
You know me ma, did I ever give you a reason to doubt
me? Did Nelly ever come to you saying I lay a hand on
her?”
Someone give that man a bells, wow. Bhekifa knowshow to
play this game, he almost reminds me of someone or a
creature… Oh yes… the devil.
Mom: “No, Nelly has never complained. Still, that
can’t justify you beating your wife up as if shemeans
nothing to you.”
Bhekifa: “I hear you and I’m sorry. Please convinceher
for me, let me take my wife and kids back home.”
When pigs could fly, I am not stepping foot in thathouse.
Mom: “Go home Bhekifa, your wife came back to her
father’s house and you know you can’t just claim herback.
We have to call a meeting with the uncles, Nelly refuses to
go home with you and I agree with her after seeing the
damage you did on her face.”
Can we love on this woman? I have never been moreproud
to call her my mother.
Bhekifa: “You’re taking sides ma, don’t you think
that’s unfair?”
He snorts, Bhekifa Zulu snorts at my mother. I needto sort
this man out.

-CHERYL ZIKHALI.
Bree is too crowded today, I cringe in crowded places.
The taxi marshal points me to a taxi going toNasrec, great
there’s a seat for one person right by the door. I’m
pushed aside by some tall skinny guy that I stumble a few
steps back, the idiot is lucky I didn’t fall. He takes my seat
and faces the front as ifhe did not just ambush me, this is
why I go for whitemen. These brothers lack gentleness.

Me: “Excuse me, that’s my seat.”

He gives me a brief look with an attitude, he knowsvery
well what I’m talking about hence the ignorantstare.
Me: “Askies abuti, I came before you. You can’t just fly in
here and push me aside like that.” (Excuse me.)
Him: “I can and I did.”
He spits, the passengers gasp at his rudeness. Theyattack
him with questions and confirmations that I got here first.
Don’t you just love black people,
Ubuntu is real. Me:
“Excuse me?”
Him: “You heard me sisi, get in the front seat and stop
being dramatic. It’s not your father’s taxi, that’sthe
problem with short girls. You’re stubborn and spit
nonsense all the damn time. Yey dinkie, ngen’ emotweni.
Noma uzoyibamb’ ihamba?” (Get in the taxi shorty, or
will you catch it when it’s moving.”
The audacity of this fool.
Me: “Luister hier you chop stick, I am not your girlfriend.
You will not talk to me like I sleep on thatbonny chest, jy
vurstaan?” (Listen here) (Do you understand?)
He laughs at my threat.
Him: “Yeah sure… Get in the front seat sisi, we need
someone to count the change. Haibo, we have to gethome
and rest. It’s been a long day.”
The idiot says and the passengers agree with him,funny
how people can support you and turn their backs on
you in the blink of an eye.
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Me: “Count change huh?”

“Yeah ngena man, une drama sisi yoh. These modelC
people are full of it.” (Get in, you’re so dramatic.)

Some lady sings from the back, I will show them.

The driver enters after me, unfortunately for the forward
passengers, this Quantum contains one passenger seat in
front. I turn back to find the idiotscollecting the money.
Me: “Everyone listen up, every row must count their
money and sort the change amongst themselves. Iwill not
be counting change.”
Complaints and shouts fill the taxi, they will not
insult me and think I will accommodate them.
“We’re not going to do that sisi, you have to countthe
change.”
The lady that sang before says, she has a big mouthfor
someone her age.
“Yeah, it’s your job to count the change.”
The fool who took my seat jumps in with this line.
Me: “Says who? Where does it say that the personwho
sits with the driver should count change?”
More complaints come my way, they are afraid of taxi
maths that’s why they are all seated at the back.
Me: “I don’t care what you people say, count… your…
own… change. I want the driver’s full amount or elseyou
will not be getting your cents back.”
The driver glares at me, his mouth opens as he getsready
to say something I know will piss me off.
Driver: “You have to count the money ousie. Wheredo
you think this is?”
I knew it.
Me: “Definitely not where I was employed.”
He shakes his head, disapproving of my statement.
Driver: “We’re not moving then until you accept that
money.”
With this declaration someone taps my shoulder, I turn to
find a fist full of ten rand notes. These people
think I’m playing, I turn back to the driver.
Me: “I guess we’ll camp here.”
Driver: “Inkani sisi, ungowakabani isbongo?” (You’reso
stubborn, what is your surname?)
Me: “Driver wag ‘n bitjie osemblief toe. Wena do yourjob
and drive us home, these people will do the counting for
you. I do not work for the taxi association.” (Wait a bit.)
My phone buzzes in my bag, I fiddle in search for itwhile
shutting out the loud complaints. A call frommy mother?
I’m not late today.
Me: “Mama?”
The driver catches my serious gaze, shakes his headin
defeat and starts the vehicle.
Mom: “Sia has been hospitalized, the flu worsenedNkosi.
She couldn’t breathe so I had to rush her toCoronation
hospital. It’s a good thing Jabu was around, I don’t know
what I would have done.”
It can’t be, my baby looked fine this morning.
Me: “What did the doctors say mama? Please tell me
my baby is okay.”
Mom: “We’re still waiting for them to inform us, youhave
to get here now.”
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The urgency in her voice worries me. Me:

“Woah driver, can I get off please.”
This is going to piss everyone off, I don’t care. I haveto
take a taxi to Coronationville, the driver stops while
complaining his life away. His passengers singalong,
throwing insults my way. They are lucky I’m ina hurry.

-NELLY PAGE.

Bhekifa refuses to leave, I don’t know what else he wants

my mother to say. They have been at it for a while, I am
tired of him and I’m tired of hiding in this kitchen. I don’t
know why my mother is not throwinghim out. My father
will be home around 8pm, the kids are probably on the
way home from their sportsactivities. I can’t risk them
finding their father here.
They will want to know why he’s leaving them behind.
Mom: “Why are you so stubborn Mkhwenyane?” (Sonin-
law)
Maybe if you stop calling him Mkhwenyane, he willleave us
in peace.
Bhekifa: “I’m not stubborn ma, I’m desperate. Myhouse
is empty, I need my family with me.”
Mom: “And I told you, you can’t take them with you.Go
home, talk to your uncles and we’ll take it from there.”
Bhekifa: “Ma, you’re not hearing me.”
He’s getting upset, I know that tone. Bhekifa betternot
try anything with my mother.
Bhekifa: “Nelly!”
Why is he yelling my name? My mother is right, he’s
stubborn. It scares me to think he will find me in here.
Bhekifa: “Dali, mamakhe. Please come out my love,let’s talk
about this.”
How dare he disrespects my father’s wife in hishouse by
shouting like a lunatic?
Mom: “Mkhwenyane stop, you need to leave.” (Son in
-law.)
My mother's voice is powerless compared to Bhekifa’s
loud rumble, think Nelly think. Survival first,if he finds me
in here then with no doubt he will surely drag me out of
my father’s house. Husbands think they have claim over
their wives. Listening to the mini argument between the
husband and my mother, I plug the kettle and turn it on.
He’s getting closer and I am in deep trouble. I’m not going
to walkout of this kitchen, everything I need to defend
myself is in here. From kitchen knives to the bottle of
mayonnaise, I will not hesitate to smash it on his head
and turn his bushy hair into salad.

Bhekifa: “Ngenhlonipho efanele mama, ngicela

ungangivimbi.” (With all due respect, please don’tstop
me.)
He says that trying to maintain the respect in his
tone, but failing dismally.
Mom: “You’re acting crazy now, I’m going to call the
police.”
I don’t think that would be a good idea, he’s still thefather
of my kids.
Bhekifa: “Ngifuna umkami nje, I’m not causing
trouble.” (I just want my wife.)
I stand back when I hear them approaching, my eyesglued
on the entrance. The kitchen entrance connected to the
corridor has no door, so I can’t really shut a door and
lock myself in here. I would have to be quite like a church
mouse. His eyes widenas they meet mine, his face takes up
a threating frown. If my mother were not here, he would
thrash me for not answering him when he called. That’s
how angry he looks right now. My mother is standing
behind him, looking defeated and unsettled.
Bhekifa: “Dali, asambe ekhaya.” (Let’s go home mylove.)
His voice is a sweet whisper although his facedepicts
anger.
Me: “I’m not going anywhere with you.”
I grunt, slowly and softly, my refusal has him
narrowing his eyes.
Bhekifa: “Nelly Zulu… mkami. Let’s go home, take thekids
and let’s go home.” (My wife.)
Me: “I said I’m not going anywhere with you,
Bhekifa.”
I yell unwillingly, it’s the anger that has put me in this
spotlight. The man dared to disrespect my mother, today he
has proven that he is his mother’s child.

To be continued©
“TEN”

SABELO ZULU.

The lady I hired to trail my sister in-law is blowing upmy

phone, I have about five missed calls from her.
Boitshepo Modisane probably wants her money, I will go
broke with this woman. I had to choose a woman to spy
on Nelly, in that way she would suspect nothing. Rose
walks into the living room and
finds a seat just as I’m about to answer her sixth call.

Me: “Poi.” (Boy.)

Yes, you guessed it, she’s one of the guys. Not the woman
you would want to take home to your mother.Mariam
would retire as a mother had she had Boitshepo as a
daughter in-law. The girl can stand her ground.
Boity: “Why do you have a phone Sabelo?” Nonsense.
Why do women always have questions?
Me: “Keng Boity? O ba tlang?” (What do you want?)
Boity: “You won’t believe who’s at his in-laws rightnow?”
This woman thinks I have time to waste, I should be
entertaining my wife, not her.
Me: “Ke mang?” (Who?)
Boity: “Ohoo, oang perfom-ela poi? You seem to forget
that I’m your spy and you need me more than Ineed you.”
(Why are you giving me an attitude?)
Me: “Askies ntwana, bua nou. Wat gaan aan?” (Talkto
me, what’s going on?)
I’m in a good mood today, I don’t want trouble.
Boity: “Ke snai se e ba re ke Bhekifa, he’s at his in-laws.”
(It’s that idiot brother of yours.)
Me: “What?”
The news brings me up to my feet, this cannot be
happening.
Me: “O batla eng mo?” (What is he doing there?)
Boity: “Is it not obvious? Vrou ea hae.” (His wife.)
Me: “Dammit man, Bhekifa is stupid. I could swearwe
have different fathers.”
Boity: “Well, I had to deliver the news. Now it’s up toyou
what you do with it.”
Me: “Dankie poi, I’ll sort those two out.” (Thank youboy.)
Boity: “Sho sho, dala what you must ntwana.” (Do
what you must.)
She sends her goodbyes before hanging up, Rose isstaring
with a serious expression.

Rose: “You know you should lower the volume onyour

phone, it will get you into trouble.”
She says, moving to sit next to me.Me:
“You heard that?”
Rose: “Yes and there is only one option baby, killthem.”
This is why I married this woman.
Me: “Ma bhebeza man, I am a proud husband right
now.”
She giggles at my words.
Rose: “I don’t know why you never thought of that
Sabelo, but first you need to find out if he has you inhis
will. If he doesn’t then make sure your brother adds you,
you are his only brother and he knows thatyou depend on
him. I’m sure it won’t be hard.”
Lord thank you for this woman.
Me: “His money is all we want, Nelly has made our
lives difficult. So if we have them killed I will take over
his side businesses and his accounts. We’regoing to be
rich smomondiya.” (Beautiful.)
She smiles when I lean in for a kiss and pushes meback.
Rose: “You see why this is not going to work? You’renot
using all of your knowledge Sabelo.”
Me: “What did I do now?”
Rose: “The brats, we have to get rid of them too. Bhekifa
will probably leave his asserts to them, theyhave to die.”
Am I impressed or am I impressed? I thought Rose was
all beauty with no brains, the woman has provenme wrong
today.
Me: “Mabafe bonke.” (Let them all die.)
She smiles widely and wraps her arms around myneck.
Rose: “Mabafe bonke baby.” (Let them all die.)
She declares leaning in for that long awaited kiss, Ilove
the grin on her face.
Rose: “You can kiss me now.”
Me: “Mabafe bonke sthandwa sam” (They must alldie
my love.”
Rose giggles before our lips meet.
“No one is going to die.”
My mother’s loud voice interrupts our session, weturn to
find her with her hands on her waist and a heavy frown
on her face. Damn this woman likesruining things for
me.
-CHERYL ZIKHALI.

Sia is in ICU, I don’t understand how she suddenly fell

ill. The doctor diagnosed her with a severe caseof
pneumonia. We’re waiting to see her, it’s taking longer
than I thought though.
Jabu: “Do you need anything? I can get you some
coffee.”
Me: “I’m okay Jabu.”
My mother says the same, she blames herself forSia’s
condition.
Mom: “How did I not see this?”
She’s starting to depress me with her never ending
questions.
Me: “Blaming yourself won’t change anything, pleasestop.”
Jabu: “I agree with Cheryl, Sia will be fine. She hasher
father’s heart.”
Jabu is right, Zain was strong willed, a fighter. My
mother is the first to get up when we see the doctor
approaching.
Me: “How is my baby?”
We eagerly wait for her as she clears out the smile on her
face, I don’t know if it was her way of greetingor that’s
just protocol.
Doctor: “I would recommend that you take her to a
private hospital so she can get the best treatment, you
daughter is critical ma’am. Had you brought herhere on
time, we would be able to tackle the problem.”
Me: “I can’t afford a private hospital, I don’t have medical
aid. Isn’t there anything else you can do?”
My mother is defeated, she finds her way back to herseat.
Doctor: “We can keep her here under observation, but
we’re not fully equipped. I suggest you find a wayto get her
to a private hospital.”
With that she walks away, leaving us in total silence.
-NELLY PAGE.

Bhekifa: “I don’t think you heard what I said Nelly,we…

are… going… home.”
I don't really need him to iron the words out for me.He
takes two steps in, his eyes stabbing me. My mother
can’t see it as she’s standing behind him, she can’t see
the predatory form he has taken. I amhis prey and he’s
haunting me down with everythingin him. Gosh if this
woman was not here, I don’t know what would be
happening.
Me: “Stop.”
I raise my hand to gesture that he stops, he doesn’t and
my mind is thinking the worst. He can be manipulative. I
know he won’t hit me when he gets his hands on me,
however he will inflict some kind ofpain that will force me
to willingly walk out with him. The kettle clicks indicating
that the water has boiledto an automated temperature,
I’m reminded why I turned it on and that has me reaching
for it over the counter. With one spin, I turn back to the
husband
with a weapon of mass distraction in hand. Mass
distraction because his precious face will not survivewater
that has boiled at 100 degrees Celsius.
Me: “Take one more step and I will baptize you withthis
water.”
He laughs, yet I am dead serious.
Bhekifa: “You wouldn’t.”
Me: “Try me, God try me and see how crazy I can
get.”
His jaw drops as shock claims his eyes.
Bhekifa: “Nelly? Is this you? You’re talking to me like
this?”
Me: “I’m tired Bhekifa, I’m tired of your shit. Whywon’t
you let me breathe?”
Bhekifa: “Ma, do you see this? Then she says I attacked
her, this is not the first time ma. The lasttime it was a
knife in front of my brother, you canask him if you don’t
believe me.”
What the hell is he doing? He’s looking for an escapefor
acting crazy in my father’s house.
Mom: “Nelly put that kettle down.”
Me: “He’s lying ma, don’t believe him. This is who heis, he
lies and cheats. I wouldn’t be surprised if he has a
certificate in both these fields.”
Bhekifa: “No, I would never lie about something likethis
ma. Nelly tends to be violent, sometimes I fearfor the kids.
What if she turns her anger on them?”
Me: “Stop lying Bhekifa, I would never hurt mychildren,
never.”
I shout, his lies are driving me crazy. How could hespew
them like this?
Bhekifa: “You see ma, this shouting of hers is not afirst. I
live in constant noise, every mistake I makeNelly yells just
like this.”
Gosh no, please no. I don’t know how to defend myself
and when I’m losing a battle, tears come outto play.
Me: “Don’t believe him ma, please.”
I can’t tell what she’s thinking, Bhekifa is really good at
this lying thing.
Mom: “I believe you my child, now put the kettledown.”
Me: If you believe me, then you will understand whatI’m
about to do.”
I open the lid of the kettle and splash the water rightat
him, he sees it coming and escapes with a few drops on
his chest.
Bhekifa: “Are you insane?” He
grunts, grinding his teeth.Me:
“Insane? No dear hubby.”
I shout, and I’m not about to stop now.
Me: “I am mad as hell Bhekifa, I am tired and havehad
it with you.”
Mom: “Nelly please calm down.”
She pleads, crying. I hate seeing tears in my mother’s
eyes. But I need to get this man out of thehouse.
Bhekifa: “Ma is right, calm down dali. We can talkabout
this please.”
This man, Jezus…
Me: “Get out of my father’s house before I do theworst.”
I yell at an unmoved Bhekifa, I shouldn’t have missed.
That’s why he’s so confident, he thinks I will miss again.
He moves back when I begin my walk to distraction, I am
going to burn this man. Seeing the grave expression on my
face, Bhekifa takes more steps until he’s standing right in
front of the kitchen door. I ignore my mother who’s
begging that I stop my craziness and throw the water at
him. He shouts in pain as the hot water splashes on his
stomach.
Bhekifa: "You're not going to get away with this."Me:
"Get out you bastard."
With one hand he twists the door handle and flies
outside, I follow him as he stumbles with fast
movements until he reaches his car.
Bhekifa: “I’m coming back for you Nelly, you’re mywife
and I will never let you go.”
He declares loudly and by God I believe him. He will
never give up, I watch him until he drives out of the yard.
Marching back to the kitchen, I find my mother seated on a
chair, her hand on her chin and elbow onthe table. She
regards me with a defeated look and shakes her head.
Mom: “Nelly…”
Me: “Not now ma, I’m done playing the naïve wife.”I
tell her and leave her to gather herself together.

To be continued©
“ELEVEN”

SABELO ZULU.

I am up to hell and back with Mariam and her controlling

ways, what in the name of money does she mean no one
dies? Rose releases a long heavysigh, showing her
frustrations without shame and Mariam… well, let’s just
say the woman is appalled by the act. I should teach the
wife to control herself,we wouldn’t want to be out on the
streets now.
Would we? Standing in the doorway, Mariam stabs us
with a deadly glare. I see the hate she has for mywife, then
again, who does this woman love?

Me: “Magriza?”
She clicks her tongue at me, I should find that
disrespectful.
Mariam: “Tell me why I wasted my money sendingyou
to school Sabelo? You are such a
disappointment my son, look at the bad decisionsyou
have made in life?”
Her eyes are glued on my wife, Rose regards herwith a
tongue click. She couldn’t care less whatMariam thinks.
Mariam: “We ntombazane, go to your room right now,
gather all your trash and get out of my house.” (Girl)
Ehhh!!! My mother’s request brings Rose up to herfeet,
her eyes as wide as they can go.
Rose: “Askies mama?” (Excuse me?)
Mariam: “You heard me sfebe ndini.” (Prostitute.)
She roars at the wife, Rose’s tears are always on
standby. I’m shook by how she quickly cries, is thisnot
the woman who showed me a different kind ofstrength
seconds ago?
Me: “Magriza yini manje? Why are you doing this?”
(What is it?)
Mariam: “Thula wena! How dare you let your wife
disrespect me like that? I give you a roof above yourhead,
feed you and you have the nerve to click your
tongue at me!” (Shut up.)
A tongue click? My wife is being thrown out of thehouse
because of a tongue click? Mariam is not serious, she
can’t be.
Me: “Slip of the tongue mama, forgive her.”
These looks she constantly gives me that make mefeel
stupid… Jeer!
Me: “Apologise nawe Baby.” (You.)
Rose: “Sorry mama.”
That was a weak ass apology, but it should do.
Mariam: “Get out of my sight, useless woman.”
Rose runs out of the living room in tears, I will pacifyher
later. I need to deal with this one first, or she will deal
with me judging by that look in her eyes. She’s coming in,
anger in her eyes. I don’t know if I shouldstep back or
wait for the inevitable. Mariam slaps me so hard across
my face that my head spins, my hand rises to rub away the
throbbing pain. Never in my life have I felt my mother’s
hand, she handled mewith care and too much affection
that annoyed her
siblings. Today… today she stands before me, chestrising
and falling as it portrays the amount of anger held in her
heart.
Mariam: “Don’t you ever talk about killing your
brother again.”
What just happened? My eyes follow her when shemoves
to sit down, she crosses her leg over the other and her
arms comfortably rest on the armrestof the couch.
Me: “What wrong did I do mama? I was merely tryingto
fix the problem we are faced with, Bhekifa went back to
Nelly...”
This woman did not just shut me up by raising herhand.
Where does she think this is? Wakanda?
Mariam: “I know.”
She is so chilled about it, like it doesn’t matter thatwe’re
going to lose it all if those two get back together.
Mariam: “Listen to me, Sabelo, Bhekifa is my son. His
death would surely kill me, remember our enemy
is Nelly not him. If anyone is to die then it’s her, Ms little
too perfect. Knowing her father, he won’t let herleave the
house without talking to your uncles. All I have to do now
is convince them that our dear daughter in-law is a loose
woman who jumps into every bed offered to her.”
And she says I’m stupid.
Me: “How will they believe you? It will be your word
against hers, she will play you like a violin mama andmake
you look stupid to your siblings.”
She can huff all she wants, I know I’m right. I’m always
bloody right, like wiping out the whole family.That is one
master plan, a perfect murder I would say.
Mariam: “I know how to play my cards right, you waitand
watch.”
Aii!! We shall wait and watch then, though I’m readyto
sing ‘I told you so.’

-CHERYL ZIKHALI.
Jabu drove my mother home, she has to fetch Earthfrom
the neighbours. I’m not okay with my kids being left next
door, friends or no friends. People arefighting their own
demons out there and your child could be in the wrong
place at the wrong time. I’ve read of mothers poisoning
their kids to spite an abusive husband or boyfriend and
the kid from nextdoor gets caught in the war. Murder
suicides are also common within family feuds. The
thought makes my blood boil, so I shake my head to clear
it, of the terrible thoughts. I’m thinking of getting a loan
from Capitec or African bank. Sia has to be okay, losing
my husband was enough torture to last me, my whole life.

“Excuse me ousie.” (Lady.)

A female nurse says, I didn’t see her coming. I’ve been
lost in my thoughts, I tend to drift away whentroubled.
Nurse: “The doctor would like to see you and please
wear a mask when you go in there.”
Giving me an attitude so late at night! This mask thing
is annoying. No one can breathe in those things, people
don’t bother in taxis, town is even worse. We’re all
breathing each other’s Covids, it’sreally a mess out
there.
I knock once and the doctor shouts for me to get in. He’s
seated behind a table, eyes glued on a file before him as
he flips from page to page. His eyebrows tightened in a
knot, it’s not the doctor fromthe afternoon. This one is all
masked up, full protective gear from head to toe.
Doctor: “Take a seat Miss.”
It’s Mrs actually, but I don’t tell him. I’m not okay withthe
serious expression on his face.
Me: “How is my daughter?”I
figure that’s why I’m here.
Doctor: “The doctor that assisted you this afternoonis a
resident, he’s new.”
Me: “Okay?”
Doctor: “They tend to make mistakes and your
daughter’s file was exchanged with another patient’sfile.
She doesn’t have pneumonia.”
My heart dances at his words.
Me: “My baby is okay?”
Doctor: “No, your daughter has the corona virus.”
There must be something wrong with my hearing, this
doctor says my child has corona virus. I laugh atwhat I
think I’m hearing.
Me: “I’m sorry doc, I didn’t hear you there. You see
everybody is talking about this Corona, it’s
everywhere… the news... work… bus stations… taxi
ranks. You name it, so I think I’m hearing it in my
head.”
Doctor: “You’re not hearing things ma’am, your childhas
the virus. We have to place you and your family under
quarantine, you’re not allowed to leave this hospital.
Transport will be provided for you and you will be taken to
the quarantine grounds in Expo Centre.”
I don’t want to hear any of that, I don’t care really.
Me: “I want to know how my daughter is doing. Isshe
going to die?”
Don’t cry Cheryl, big girls don’t cry.
Doctor: “She will be transferred to a special facilityand…”
Me: “I think we’re speaking two different languageshere,
I asked if my child is okay or not? Will she make it or
not?”
This man is not informed about this case, yet he sitshere
and tells me nonsense. My child is not infected,Sia can’t
be… no, I refuse to entertain such thoughts.
Doctor: “I need you to calm down ma’am.”
He’s testing me, I explode when tested.
Doctor: “It’s not guaranteed whether she will live ordie,
these cases are very delicate and have to be handled with
special care. We were careless, it’s ourfault.”
Me: “Damn right it’s your fault, I’m going to sue this
hospital.”
I don’t even have a lawyer that time.
Doctor: “I understand your anger ma’am, but you
need to calm down.”
Calm down he says. Me:
“I want to see her.”
Doctor: “I’m afraid that won’t be possible, she isunder
quarantine.”
Me: “I’m never going to see my child again, am I?”Doctor:
“Like I said…”
Me: “To hell with what you said doctor, I have everyright to
see my child.”
If this man has never seen a crazy woman, today hegets
front row seats. My whole body heats up, I’m sweating
so I remove my jersey. My heart is racingfaster than I
would like, my life is over.

-NELLY PAGE.
A soft knock on my bedroom door catches all myattention, I
open the door to find my son Victor.
Me: “Why aren’t you in bed Vicky? It’s a school nightand
you know how I feel about you sleeping late.”
Victor: “Relax mom, I wanted to wait for mkhulu, heis
asking for you.” (Grandpa.)
He says, frowning up at me. Victor looks so much like his
father, it creeps me out sometimes. He grewhis hair like
him too and the boy refuses to cut it, oneday I will give
him a surprise visit to the barber. He won’t have a choice,
but do as mommy says.
Me: “Thank you, my baby, you can go to bed now.”
I pat his busy hair before letting him walk away intothe
corridor. My father came home a bit late today, the time
on my phone says 10:25pm. I have to coverup the knee
length nightwear, so a morning gown does the trick.
Respect means the world to my father and that’s what I
have shown him my whole life, I don’t remember a day
back chatting the old man.
I find him seated on his favourite single couch,
reading a newspaper. I’m surprised he can still seewithout
his glasses on while my mother’s eyes havegiven up on her.
“Baba.” I greet him with a hand shake of which he
accepts with a slight smile on his face. Respectfully,I take
a sit on the couch positioned next to his.
There’s an elephant in the room, he probably doesn’tfeel it.
This heavy silence means nothing to him.
This is who he’s always been, a man of very few words
and because of that people fear him. Not fearas in he
would kill them ‘fear’ but respect ‘fear.’ Theyhold him in
high esteem.
Did I mention my father has a high position at church?I
think he’s second in command, both he and my mother love
the Lord like there is nothing else to love. It’s a beautiful
sight to see them lead each other to church, I find my
mother lucky to have a husband
like this man.
Dad: “Your mother tells me, you burnt your husbandwith
boiling water.”
Where is that snitch? He’s not looking at me, but the
Daily times newspaper in his hands.Me:
“Did she tell you why I did that?”
I wish for the world to open up and swallow me when
he raises his reprimanding gaze, I must havesaid
something wrong.
Dad: “I know everything.”
Then why look at me like I cheated on the pastor’sson?
Dad: “What’s happening with your marriage baby?”
Ahh! Now this is the daddy I know, the soft
understanding father who wants nothing with his
daughter.
Me: “Bhekifa hit me baba.”
That’s right, I’m taking the spoiled brat card, it worksthat
one. Mind you, I’m speaking from experience.
Dad: “Why?”
As chilled as ever.
Me: “He’s cheating on me and not only that, he has achild
with this woman. When I confronted him, he
beat me up.”
My father holds a heavy frown on his face, his upperlip
slowly curls in disgust. His jaw clenches and unclenches
occasionally, taking up a deep sigh andwith slow
movements, he closes the newspaper.
Dad: “Do you still love him?”
Unfortunately, he will always have a place in my
heart. The nod I give him answers his question.
Dad: “I spoke to his uncle, they will be here on
Saturday. I can’t make decisions for you baby, if I
could you wouldn’t be married to him.”
Yes, he’s not a fan. No father would ease up to aman
who made his sixteen year old daughter pregnant.
Dad: “You’re a mother now Nelly, you have kids to think
about. This marriage is not only about you andBhekifa,
your children are involved too. Whatever decision you
make will affect them, good or bad.”
What does he mean good or bad? Going back to thatman
which I’m a hundred percent sure the uncles
will vote for it; will be bad, right?
Me: “I hear you baba and I have made my decision, I
don’t want Bhekifa anymore.”
Dad: “Today is too early to decide, your heart is filledwith
rage. Give it two to three more days and then tell me how
you feel.”
I could be reading into things, but does this man want me
back with Bhekifa? Besides, my heart is nottaking the
healing route anytime soon.
Me: “I have made up my mind baba, the only thingthat
links Bhekifa and I are the children. I am donewith that
man.”
Is that a smile I see on his face? Told you he’s not afan.
Dad: “Good because I need to have a talk with him,
alone.”
That tone…
Me: “What are you going to do to him?”
I’m asking because this father of mine is not kind when
he’s angry, don’t be fooled by the Jesus sticker
on the bumper of his car and if you see him standingon the
church podium, don’t look too hard. His aura sometimes
gives him away.
Dad: “You may go back to your room Nelly.”
Listen, he says ‘go back to your room.’ Am I a child?Me:
“Okay baba.”
Like I said before, I never back chat the old man. Ican
only hope he won’t get himself in trouble by attacking
Shembe’s descendant.

-BHEKIFA ZULU.

I’m woken up by a knock on the window, the morningsun

blasts my eyes that I shut them again. The knock calls to
me again, I raise my eyes to see a policeman peeking in.
He gestures that I pull the window down.
Me: “Good morning officer.”
Cop: “Good morning se voet.” (Good morning your
foot.)Okay.
Cop: “You’re not supposed to be parked here sir.”
Me: “Excuse me, there is no sign that says no
parking.”
Cop: “Really?”
He questions, pointing at some sign ahead. It was solate
last night that I didn’t see it. After the incident with Nelly,
I drove like a maniac. I don’t know where Iwas headed to,
come to think of it, I don’t know where I am. I look
around to find anything familiar and meet a sign that says
Market Theatre. How did Iget to NewTown?
Cop: “Here’s your ticket.”
The officer tosses a piece of paper in the car, bloodyhell!
R3000 ticket?
Cop: “You might want to call someone to come getyou
or catch a taxi at Bree, your car has been stripped sir.”
He laughs and walks away while shaking his big
head, I’m quick on my feet as I jump out to investigate
the policeman’s allegations. Life doesnot love me, my
tyres are gone. Those bloody thieves took the side
mirror as well.
Me: “Hey wait up.”
I call out to the policeman, but he laughs like it is funny
and drives off. Dammit, I need to call Nelly, I would call
my brother, but he doesn’t have a car. I have her number
on speed dial, the phone is snatched from my hand as I
send it to my ear. The guy is so fast that by the time I think
of running afterhim, he turns a corner. Still, I follow him.
When I get to the corner, he is nowhere to be seen.
Me: “Dammit, somebody get him. He took my
phone.”
These people don’t care about my problems, they are
looking at me like I’ve lost my mind. As I turn back to the
car, I see two men digging… in… my… car.
Me: “Hey, what are you doing?”
My wallet is in there, the men jump out in full speed.My
attempt to run after them is embarrassing, I get
laughed at by rubbernecks.
“This is joburg mgamla, you have to open your eyes.They
might take your soul too.” (Boss.)
Some guy standing next to a white Quantum exclaims, he
seems to be amused by my misfortune.How the hell am I
going to get home? I can’t beg people for cents, I will not
degrade myself like that.

But To be continued©
“TWELVE”

NELLY PAGE.

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The plan was not to go to work today, thanks to

Buhle, I have to go in and find out why she hasn’tbeen
to work in two days. My boss called, complaining
about how incompetent I am.
Buhle should have a good explanation as to why she’s
been missing work. I decide to call her on myway there, I
need her at the office as soon as possible. I try again
when she doesn’t answer, it takes a minute for her voice
to resonate through thephone.
Buhle: “Nelly!”
Wow, the attitude is still there I see. This girl has
probably only heard about me, today she will knowNelly
Page.
Me: “My office now.”
Buhle: “I can’t, I’m not feeling well.”
Me: “I don’t care, get to the office or kiss your job
goodbye.”
I cut the call before she disputes any further, Buhleis
getting too comfortable.
Traffic is bad today, there are two men fighting onthe
streets. A crowd has gathered to watch the happenings.
This is the cause of traffic, people likethings. What
happened to practising social distancing? The president
has to see this.
I wish these cars would just move, there’s a lot of uswho
have real jobs to get to. But that fight looks interesting, I
might as well watch since the cars arenot moving. Men
can be savages, they always find areason to throw a fist.
Shame the poor guy with thebushy hair is having a hard
time with that short man,I thought tall men can fight and
hold their own. Sucha waste of tallness.

The fight is getting bumpy, someone should stop this.

Shorty is going to kill him. I get out of the car to see if I can
help, these cars won’t be moving anytime
soon. My feet falter as my eyes fall on my husband, the
short man is beating the living daylights out of him. How
is Bhekifa unable to fight back? This is histhing, fighting.
I’ve seen the strength God unfortunately gave him, I felt it
when he pulled me bymy hair. I felt it when he strangled
me, and ahh his favourite; when he forced me to bow
down to him with his hand pressed on my neck.
Our eyes meet, he looks like a battered woman and
strangely nothing in me pities him. The man I have loved
my whole life, the only man I have ever known.I should
feel sorry for him, cry or something. Lord isthis a sign?
Shame shadows him, he drops his gaze for the firsttime in
his life. Life is a bitch, isn’t it? I have seen enough, I have
work to get to.
I know he won’t say anything when I turn and start
walking back to the car. Thank God, my father drovethe
kids to school, this is something they shouldn’tbe exposed
to.
-SABELO ZULU.

“Sabelo, Sabelo.”
Hebanna!!! I know that voice, I get up on my feet to
confirm what my mind has relayed to me and dammit I’m
right. Boitshepo is outside the gate, shouting as if this is
her mother’s house. Rose and my mother rush into the
sitting room, the noise musthave brought them here.
Mariam: “Who is that idiot?”
Mariam needs to loosen up, she will have a heartattack if
she continues with her tantrums.
Me: “That’s my friend mama, I’ll go and see what she
wants.”
Rose grabs my hand as I take a step towards the exit.Rose:
“You have female friends, Sabelo?”
Me: “It’s not like that mabhebeza, she’s one of theguys.”
(Baby.)
This woman wants to nag so early in the morning.
Rose: “Yey, there’s no such thing. I don’t see a guy
mina, that’s a full woman standing there. That means
she’s capable of giving you children, tell meI’m wrong
Sabelo.”
Me: “Manje ura…se… lani Rose?” (Why are you
making noise?)
Rose: “Now that your girlfriend is here ngiyarasa
Sabelo?” (I’m making noise?)
Yoh, women. Boitshepo is still calling out for me, itmust be
an emergency. God just had to give me astubborn, nagging
wife.
Mariam: “Let him be wena, he has to check on thatfool
who is barking at my gate. I’m not running a stokvel
here.” (You.)
Thank you Mariam, I yank my hand away and rush
outside.

Boity: “Keng ka wena Sabelo heh? I’ve been callingyou

ntwana and why is your gate locked?” (What’s wrong
with you Sabelo?)
Here’s another annoying woman.
Me: “Is this why you’re making a racket early so?”(So
early in the morning.)
Boity: “It’s your brother, they are going to kill him.”Sabelo:
“Eng?” (What?)
Boity: “I’m telling you man, he’s in New Town rightnow
and some taxi driver is practising his boxingskills on
Bhekifa.”
Dammit, Bhekifa can’t die before putting me in hiswill.
Taxi drivers are dangerous, they carry guns, soI’ve
heard and my brother will meet our ancestors before his
time.
Me: “Mama, mama.”
I yell for the old lady, there is urgency in my voice and
that has the two women in my life running out ofthe house.
Me: “It’s Bhekifa, magriza hurry, he’s hurt.”
I tell her, depriving her a chance to ask the reasonbehind my
panic.
Mariam: “Yoh, Kodwa Jesu.” (Oh Jesus.)
Mariam screams and she carries her hands on herhead,
her dramatics will draw us attention.
Me: “Let’s go mama.”
I instruct, leading us to Boitshepo’s car. Where isRose
going?
Me: “Sala wena, who is going to guard the house?”She
stops at the gate, frowning up at me.
Rose: “But baby…”
Me: “Just stay back, Rose.”
I snap and rush to the passenger’s seat.
Rose: “You’re a married man Sabelo, remember
that.”
She shouts, her eyes holding Boitshepo in an intenseglare,
Rose can be too insecure.

CHERYL ZIKHALI.
I have to call in at work and inform them about my
situation, in case they decide to fire me for being absent
without leave. My mother and Earth were brought here
last night, I haven’t seen them yet. Jabuis here too,
unfortunately he was also exposed to theinfected.
Right now I don’t want anything, but to see my babies.
They must be terrified, especially Sia, she’sall alone.
I would like to believe that Earth is with my mother, it’s a
crazy thought I know, but it keeps me sane. I send my
boss a text message that I’m on quarantinefor fourteen
days, I don’t know why I feel a need to text Mr. Zulu as
well. Not that he would care, the man has not
acknowledged my presence the way I would like him to.
“I’m currently under quarantine with my family, I don’t
know if I will leave this place dead or alive. Justletting you
know so you don’t wonder.”
And… sent… It’s strange how I think he will care.
-NELLY PAGE.

The door to my office is slightly open hence I find Buhle

standing in the doorway when I raise eyes from the file
before me, I get chills on my body at theway she is glaring
at me. She blinks once, then knocks and lets herself in. I
can hardly see her face with that head scarf covering half
of it, she stands adistance away from my work station.

Me: “Will you come in or stand there?”

Buhle: “I’m fine here.”
She holds on to her stubbornness, let’s see how longshe’s
willing to keep it up.
Me: “What’s wrong with you? Since when do you
come to work dressed like that?”
Buhle: “I’m sorry, but my contract doesn’t state how Ishould
dress.”
I see.
Me: “Where have you been? Mrs. Bhengu tells methat
you haven’t been to work in days.”
Buhle: “I have family issues.”
Me: “And you couldn’t report your leave days?”
Buhle: “I forgot.”
She forgot? I nod at her response, not because I agree
with her, but I am up to here with her attitude.
Me: “Do you still want your job Buhle?”
She shrugs her shoulders as if I should read fromthat,
this girl must be okay in life to have such an attitude
towards her senior.
Buhle: “I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.”
She spits coldly, I have had it.
Me: “Then listen to me, Buhle because I am not going to
repeat myself ever again. You and I are not friends, we
will never be. This is a place of business,not your mother’s
shebeen. You report when you can’t make it to work and if
you happen to fall sick then I expect a doctor’s note. Are
we clear?”
The girl rolls her eyes at me, maybe I’m wearing aclown
outfit, she’s not taking me seriously.
Buhle: “I know the rules, I’ve been working here for a
while.”
She says this folding her arms across her chest, I zoom
in on her to make sure I’m not seeing things.The woman
is giving me an attitude.
Me: “Then you should know that I don’t take
nonsense from anyone, not even you Buhle.”
I bring myself up to move closer to her.
Me: “Like I said, we’re not friends and I will not tolerate
your shit little girl. Now I want you to go towork and catch
up. I have an appointment at 2pmwith Mrs. Wilson.
Please call her to confirm the time.”
Buhle looks ready to kill, I notice the breakout on herskin.
I’m not bothered, right now, I’m a bitter angry woman
and I will not let anyone walk all over me.
Buhle: “I was on my way to the doctor, I can’t worktoday.”
I saw this coming.
Me: “Tough, you will have to see the doctor tomorrow.
I wasn’t told about a sick leave. And youcan only have
tomorrow off unless the doctor tellsyou otherwise. Now
go to your desk and do what Ipay you to do.”
I make sure to let my anger and authority out through my
words. Buhle huffs and Lord let her rollher ugly eyes at
me again, I will shoot her with one good fat warning
letter.
She spins with the same attitude she’s been wearingsince
she walked in the office and begins marching towards the
door.
Buhle: “Bitter bitch, no wonder your husband seeks
comfort in other women.”
She mumbles loud enough for me to hear, my heartdoes
something crazy there. It’s sitting on my throatand I want
to strangle the life out of her. My feet rush to the door and
I shut it before she slithers out,my little drama shocks her.
Her eyes widen as she steps back.
Me: “What the hell did you just say to me?”
Now she’s silent, no words to say! She crosses herarms
again on her chest.
Me: “Sisi, you better speak now or I will be spendingthe
night in a prison cell after I have dealt with you.”
I hiss at her, preparing myself for whatever isrunning
through her frail mind.

cm®
To be continued©
“THIRTEEN”

CHERYL ZIKHALI.

I thought I would see my family when they were moving

me to the quarantine grounds in Expo Centre,I’m going
crazy with worry and no one would tell me where they
are. Everyone seems to be too busy to entertain me, to
think my mother’s house is a few streets away from this
place. It is sad how life can take a U-turn in the blink of
an eye, this ordeal has taught me not take anything for
granted. Love without limits, forgive whoever needs to be
forgiven.Go for that one thing you have always wanted.
Spend that last cent, spoil yourself because youdeserve it.

My phone is the only form of contact I have. I decideto call

Jabu, he might have information regarding mychildren and
my mother. First I check his last seen, itwill confirm if he
has his phone with him or not. I
come across a message from him, asking if I’m okay.His
last seen is a few seconds ago. Let me call him using the
app, it will save my airtime. The phone rings for a while
before his voice tickles my ears.
Jabu: “Nkosi.”
Me: “Ugogo wakho uNkosi.” (Your grandmother is
Nkosi.)
He laughs, I never thought I would say this, but Imiss the
sound of his laugh.
Jabu: “I miss you.”
I said his laugh, not him.
Me: “Take it easy buddy, you’ll drown if you go deep.”
I’m accommodated by another laugh from him, hedoes
that a lot, laugh like life is all rosy.
Jabu: “You see why I say I miss you? I have no oneto
keep me company in this ugly tent.”
Me: “I’m sure mine is uglier, be comforted by thatthought.”
This time he chuckles, we’re caught in silence for a
moment. Jabu has made me forget what I wanted tosay…
Oh yes…
Me: “Have you heard anything regarding Sia?”
Jabu: “No, I’m not family, so you can imagine howhard
it would be for me to get information on her.”
Me: “Dammit, I hate this Jabu. I need to know if
she’s okay, she has to be okay.”
My heart breaks thinking of her tiny body lying in a
hospital bed, no mother can stand their child beingsick.
Jabu: “Sia will be okay Cheryl, you need to stay
positive. Remember the law of attraction gives youwhat
you think about the most, now stop attractingnegative
things.”
Jabu is right, my thoughts will bring harm upon my
child.
Me: “What about mom and Earth? Are they okay?”
Jabu: “They are, I saw them during the transfer. Idon’t
know if they are kept in the same chamber.”
Me: “My baby must be terrified, he’s probably
confused.”
This is not home and kids tend to wonder when theyare
kept from home for too long, soon he will start asking
questions like, where his sister is and why we’re not all,
together.

I had a hard time with them when Zain died, Earth

being the oldest was the troublesome one. He couldn’t
understand why his father was put in a boxand buried-
his words to be exact.
My mother had warned me against taking them to the
funeral, she said kids should not be exposed tohow a body
is disposed after the soul has departed.Not only did I
traumatise my child, but gave him subscription of
nightmares every time he lain downto sleep.

-NELLY PAGE.

Buhle takes a step back, she refuses to let go of her

attitude. It scares me to think that she could be the
woman sleeping with my husband, the mother of his
bastard child.

Me: “I’m waiting.”

I make sure to directly keep my eyes on her solid cold
gaze, her upper lip slowly curls into a smirk. Thesame
hard eyes narrow, she’s staring at me with disgust. I’m
lost at first when she starts running herfingers along her
lower lip. What game is she playingat?”
Buhle: “Bhekifa Zulu.”
My heart stops for a second, the familiarity in her voice
as she says my husband’s name confirms mydeepest fear.
Buhle: “He has kissed these lips,”
I’d be damned, she slides her hand down to herchest
and slowly rubs her breasts.
Buhle: “He has touched and kissed these breasts.”My
blood is boiling, in my head I see her dropping
dead on the spot. I lose all senses when her handbegins
to slide down her stomach, I know where she’s taking
this.
Me: “Enough.”
I shout with whatever authority I have, it works
because she’s startled a little.
I don’t have to think twice about slapping her across the
face, the head scarf drops to the floor, revealing her
deformed face.

The sight is appalling, something I would not want tolook

at. These boils must be a punishment for her evil deeds.
Buhle sends her hand to rub away the pain, I should slap
her on the other cheek as well.
This girl is disrespectful.
Me: “Is my husband the father of your baby?”
She nods, fighting back the tears that have floodedinto her
eyes.
Me: “You bitch, all this while you were working forme
and sleeping with my husband?”
Buhle: “Bhekifa needed a real woman, you don’t haveit in
you to satisfy a real man like him.”
Me: “Is that what he told you?”
Someone tell me why I’m tolerating this girl.
Buhle: “No, I just knew it. Why else would he
approach me?”
She says, full of pride.
Me: “I see and so this is your greatest achievement, being a
side chick to a married man? A man who willnever spend
the entire night with you, just four seconds of orgasm and
he’s done with your decayedvagina.”
Buhle: “He always came back for more, that provesthat he
loved what he got from me.”
I laugh at her stupidity.
Me: “You’re so pathetic Buhle, Bhekifa is a man. Menlove
meat, no doubt about that. Show me a man whowouldn’t
pick up a piece of meat after it has fallen tothe ground and
devour it like it’s the healthiest thinghe’s ever eaten. That
same meal will send him
running to the toilet with a runny stomach, their naivety
will have them repeating the same process,but one day
he will grow tired of the dirty meat andremember that he
has a clean plate of food at home.”
She drops her eyes as my words seem to hit home.Me:
“What is it? Has he grown tired of you already?”
Her eyes are still hiding from me, stupid girl doesn’tknow
the ways of life.
Buhle: “There is nothing special about you Nelly.”Hee!
This child…
Me: “Yeyi, don’t you dare. You don’t get to call me bymy
name. I am not one of your street friends.”
I should gauge her eyes out, since she doesn’t knowwhat
to do with them, but roll them.
Me: “You’re fired.”
I snap sharply, I don’t want to kill someone. I know Iwill if
she continues working here.
Buhle: “You can’t fire me, I have rights.”
Now she has the nerve to widen her eyes at me, shedrops
them due to the frown I shoot her with.
Me: “I said you’re fired you bitch, get your shit andget
out.”
This time I feel a need to shout, loud enough to keepit in
the office. Somehow, I’m relieved that Bhekifa has not
revealed the abuse to her, the last thing I want is for her
to know about my weak moments.
She bends over to grab her ugly scarf and covers the
ugliness draped on her face.
Buhle: “This is not over, I will fight you.”
Me: “If you’re willing to fight your whole life, then go
ahead darling. Make sure you’re prepared to pay your
lawyer with your body because by the time I’mdone with
you, you will be living under a bridge.”
I watch too much Law and Order, this trick should
work. And ohh, it does. Fear covers her eyes, she clicks
her tongue and rushes out. I knew she wouldslam the
door behind her.
-BHEKIFA ZULU.

I can’t look at my brother and mother, they have gathered

in the living room to see the damage done to me. I can’t
really explain what happened, the mansuddenly attacked
me. I couldn’t fight back, I thoughtI was strong to fight
him, but I was proven a weakling.

Sabelo: “Eish saan, baku khawathe blind ntwana.”

(They hit you pretty bad.)
Sabelo exclaims what I already know, he sits besideme,
closer than I would like. I’m in pain and don’t want
anyone next to me.
Mariam: “What happened Bhekifa? What was a manlike
you doing in a place like that?”
My mother is angry, her anger is directed to me notthe
man who attacked her son.
Me: “I don’t know.”
I grumble, too ashamed to speak. The old lady
snorts in irritation, I wish they would leave me alone.
Especially Sabelo, he’s zooming in on every wound and
scratch on my battered face.
Sabelo: “So he just attacked you, out of the blue?You
didn’t provoke him?”
Me: “Yes.”
My mother seems to grow annoyed by the second.
Mariam: “Bhekifa Zulu.”
She calls with a strict tone.
Me: “Ma!”
Mariam: “Are you going to tell me what happened orwill
you keep giving us short answers?”
Me: “Eish mama. I told you, I don’t know, okay? I was
robbed this morning, they striped my car, took my phone,
my wallet and the next I was in a fight with that short
man.”
Mariam: “What is happening to you, my son?”My
life is falling apart, that’s what.
“Hey, stop. You can’t go in there.”
That’s my sister in law’s voice, she’s yelling from thekitchen.
Sabelo is on his feet in a jiffy, probably to inspect what the
commotion is about.
“Where is Bhekifa?”
Dammit! What is Buhle doing here? She walks intothe
living room, with a baby in her arms and a babybag
hanging down her shoulder. Sabelo and Rosestand
right beside her.
Buhle: “I knew I would find you here when I went toyour
office and they told me you didn’t come in today.”
What is this woman saying to me? Her disrespectful
confession brings me to my feet.
Me: “You did what?”
Buhle: “I went to your office Bhekifa.”
Buhle has constantly been a pain in the arse,
stubborn and does whatever she sees fit.
Buhle: “You don’t take my calls, what did you expectme to
do?”
Me: “Not go to my office dammit, I’m a married man.Do
you have any idea I could lose my position at work? You’re
so stupid Buhle man.”
Mariam: “Who is this Bhekifa?”
My eyes run to my mother, then to Sabelo and Rosewho
are now seated and observing everything, seemingly
humoured by the drama unfolding beforethem.
Me: “She is no one mama.”
Honest truth.
Buhle: “I’m the mother of his child, this baby.”
Disrespectfully, she answers. Buhle has never metmy
mother, this is one woman you don’t play with.
Mariam: “I see and how can we help you?”
Buhle: “I brought his baby to him.”
Sabelo: “Heee banna.” (An expression of shock.) Mariam:
“Okay, I hear you sisi. Can I see the proof?”
My mother hasn’t moved an inch from her seat, shesits like
she owns the world.
Buhle: “Askies ma?” (Excuse me?)
Mariam: “Surely you don’t expect us to believe thatthing in
your arms is a Zulu.”
Buhle gasps in shock, I did say she hasn’t met my
mother.
Buhle: “This child is Bhekifa’s child, you can ask himif you
don’t believe me.”
Mariam: “I’m not disputing with you ntombazana (girl),
I’m only asking for proof. Who knows? Maybe you want
to trap my son with a child that has nothingto do with us
because of his money.”
I should sit down and let Mariam handle this, I’m not
saying the child is not mine nor am I claiming it as my
own. But Buhle needs to be taught a lesson… toactually
come to my mother’s house to drop the baby without
talking to me about it?
Buhle: “I would never do that, Bhekifa and I have been
dating for a while now. Sandile is proof of that.”
Mariam cackles, clapping her hands in disbelief. Hereyes
find me, I can’t look into them as they are
scolding me.
Sabelo: “Sandile baby.”
Sabelo expresses, I think he’s enjoying this show orhe’s
being his usual stupid-self.
Mariam: “Bhekifa!”
Me: “Ma.”
I see a lecture coming.
Mariam: “Is this what you have done for yourself?
Dating women that look like this thing and giving them
babies? Is this how you plan to live your life?Planting
bastards all over Gauteng?”
I hope she is not expecting a reply, I don’t have one.
Buhle: “Bhekifa, are you going to sit there and letyour
mother insult me?”
Why is she here?
Me: “I didn’t ask you to come to my house Buhle, I told
you that I want nothing to do with you. I will takecare of
my son.”
Buhle: “You can’t do this to me, Bhekifa. I have given
my life to you, I lost my job because of you. Yourstupid
wife fired me.”
It was about time.
Mariam: “Sisi, did I not tell you to bring forward proofthat
this child is a Zulu?”
Buhle: “He is a…”
My mother interrupts Buhle’s complaint by raisingher
hand.
Mariam: “I don’t run a feeding scheme, now get outof my
house.”
No one cannot disobey that tone, I look away whenBuhle
glares at me. She knows her way out.
Sabelo: “Shame, let me walk you out.”
What is Sabelo doing? Rose follows them and I’mleft to
face my mother’s wrath.

cm®
To be continued©
“FOURTEEN”

NELLY PAGE.

Great! Now I have to conduct interviews for a new

personal assistant as if I have time for that. Buhlejust
had to be a wolf in sheep’s clothing. I can bestupid
sometimes. Or is it that people take advantage of you
when you’re kind?
I’m driving home after a long day at work, I’m almost
there. Bhekifa has been blowing up my phone, the
stubbornness of a Zulu man has him leaving crazy
multiple missed calls. There are messages as well, Idon’t
have the strength to read them. He will just ruinmy day
further.
I notice my father’s car parked as I drive in the yard,it’s
too early for him to be home. I dash into the house after
parking next to his and enter through thekitchen. There
are male voices coming from the living room, inquisitive
and curious as to what the whispering is about, I find
myself listening in.
“I knew I can count on you, Phakathi, good job.”No
way, could he be talking to Phakathi Funani?
“You know me, mhlonishwa (boss), I always get thejob
done.”
Yep, that’s him alright. I recognise that voice from
anywhere, Phakathi Funani is a guy I met in Varsity. Iwas
a freshman and he happened to spot this skinnygirl who
was lost in the corridors while trying to findher next
class. He was kind enough to accompany me, it became a
norm. Honestly, I thought he would grow tired of it, but it
became tradition for him. We grew apart after I married
Bhekifa, he said no wife ofhis will have a male best friend.
I’m surprised, he’s still acquainted with my father.
Dad: “That’s what I like to hear.”
My father actually chuckles, something he hardly ever
does. Whatever job Phakathi did, must havebeen big for
my father to be so ecstatic. I keep myself busy with
whatever my hands find when Ihear the sound of their
footsteps, trailing towards
the kitchen. My father stops at the entrance, his eyeslight up
upon seeing me.
Dad: “Hau, you’re home baby.”
Phakathi is standing next to him, waiting for me toopen
my mouth. I have no words really, my mind isstill
circulating around the conversation they were having. It
sounded like some illegal deal.
Phakathi: “Nelly Page, mehlo madala.” (Long time nosee.)
True, it has been forever. Though I can’t help, but notice
that he still looks at me with gleaming eyes, something
Bhekifa picked up and that’s when he laidrules and decided
that I had to cut ties with my longtime best friend.
Me: “Ngabe ubaba uyaphila?” (How are you dad?)
I greet him with a hand shake because we don’t do hugs
in this house, maybe my mother and me. Like Isaid, this
one demands respect.
Dad: “Just tired my child, your mother went to a
church meeting. She didn’t cook.”
This is how he asks me to make supper.Me:
“I’ll get to it baba.”
I can feel Phakathi’s eyes on me as I talk to my father, the
stabbing gaze forces me to shift my eyesto him.
Dad: “Phakathi is helping out at church, we have anew
project coming soon and we need his buildingskills.”
My father explains without me asking anything, I
guess that’s what the conversation was about.
Me: “I see, you’re still into building?”
Phakathi: “My second love.”
Gosh, he’s giving me the look. I’m sure you haveguessed
what his first love is.
Me: “How long do you plan on building beautifulhouses and
not getting the credit for it?”
I bring that up and kick away the first love nonsense.
Phakathi is a builder. He would make a great architect,
he’s good at designing projects, but his lifeis not going the
way he wants it to. He thinks he has
bad luck and his father has everything to do with it.
Phakathi: “You know it’s not about that, I have no
worries as long as I’m building something.”
Vision gone down the drain.
Me: “If you say so.”
Dad: “You may go now, it’s getting late.”
My father excuses him, the young man hesitatesbefore
bidding us goodbye.
Dad: “Please make me a cup of tea.”
With that, he walks back to the living room.

-BHEKIFA ZULU.

The house feels so hallow without my family, there’sno

aroma that greets me the moment I walk throughthe door,
no sounds of kids laughing that make the house feel like a
home. How will I sleep without my wife and kids here?
I had to leave my mother’s house, she had insisted that I
stay for a few days. To be honest, Sabelo andhis wife
were getting on my nerves. I don’t have theenergy to
prepare a little something to eat, so I optfor an early
night.
Thoughts of Nelly float inside my head, they have me
tossing and turning on the bed. I’m sweating and growing
uneasy by the second, a deep urge to call her jumps at me.
I have had many of these today, there is nothing more
painful than calling someone you love and they reject
your call.

I notice a text from an unsaved number… thinking it

could be my wife, I open it to find that it’s from the
cleaner. I don’t know why, but my lips curl into a subtle
smile as her face flashes before my eyelids.She’s an
intriguing woman, keeps me on my toes and guessing.
You can’t really read Cheryl, there’s something
fascinating about her, something that pulls me to her.
It’s crazy honestly.
Is it insane that I’m calling a woman I hardly know at
10 in the night? I must be losing it. She’s on
quarantine, I will just use this as an excuse for thecall.
It’s ringing, I’m growing impatient as it rings
unattended.

Cheryl: “Mr. Zulu.”

Her voice fills the line as I’m about to hang up, I easeinto
the blankets, getting comfortable. Did I mention there’s
something about her voice that makes something in me
jump? I can’t really explain it.
Me: “How did you get my number?”
Stupid question I know, I’m a senior in the company.Our
privacy is not exactly protected.
Cheryl: “Is this why I was woken up? I thought the
world was on fire.”
She’s funny, that I would admit.
Me: “I have to make sure that I don’t have a stalker.”
Cheryl: “No offence Mr. Zulu, but you boarder on
boredom, plain and strange. Stalking you would be a
hobby I wouldn’t risk taking.”
Me: “Ouch, are you always this blunt Cheryl?”
She chuckles at my question.
Cheryl: “I owe no one lies.”
See? She’s an intriguing woman, keeps me guessinglike I
said.
Me: “Are you okay? How is quarantine treating you?”
Cheryl: “Ahh! It’s going great. Covivi is keeping me
company, we’re having a pyjama party right now.”
She makes me laugh again, her sense of humour is…I just
love it.
Me: “Be serious Cheryl, is everything okay?”
I sound worried, don’t I? The line goes quiet you canhear
a pin drop, it’s awkward for me because I knowshe’s still
on the receiving end.
Cheryl: “My daughter has the virus, they won’t let mesee
her. I don’t understand how this happened, oneminute she
was fine and the next…”
The silence again, I don’t know what to say, how to comfort
her. She continues laying out her problems
and how she can’t change what is happening to herand
her family. A listening ear is all I can give her right
now.

-NELLY PAGE.

“Mom, my teacher says we should bring our birth

certificates. We’re doing an essay about our roots.”
Victor tells me, I catch a glimpse of his eyes in therear-
view mirror. I’m driving them to school, my father had
to leave early for work. He loves takingthem to school
whenever they visit and they love itjust as much.
Me: “Why bring your birth certificate?”
Vicky: “There are different nations in our class, soeach
person has to bring one.”
Me: “I’ll look for it.”
I left their documents in the house, how did I forgetto pack
them? I will go during the day while Bhekifais at work.
Ayanda is seated next to me, soundless
as a church mouse. She asked me this morning whywe’re
not with her father. How do I tell her that my marriage is
none existent? The kids are going to be devastated when
they find out, but this time I can’t stay for their sake.
Bhekifa wants to be father of all nations, planting his seed
wherever he trips and falls.I will not be a part of that.

-SABELO ZULU.

Ever felt like you’re being watched, even when you’re fast
asleep? Well, my brain informs me that there areeyes
stabbing me. The warning pulls me out of a deep slumber,
to find my mother standing in the doorway with her arms
folded across her chest. I joltup to a sitting position... this
woman… What kind of witchcraft is this?
Me: “Magriza?”
She frowns at me.
Mariam: “It’s nice neh, you and your lazy wife are
sleeping like royalty while your brother is suffering.”Haibo!
What is happening now?
Me: “Ang’ vurstaan magriza.” (I don’t understand.)
Mariam: “It’s after 9am Sabelo and you’re still fast
asleep, the kids have gone to school and as usual Ihad to
see them off.”
I thought we were talking about Bhekifa, how did thekids
jump into this conversation?
Me: “Mama it’s too early to listen to you complaining,
don’t you get tired?”
Mariam: “Don’t tell me nonsense wena, I want toknow
about that cheap girl that was in my houseyesterday.”
Yeah hey! I respect old age, her brain appears to be
relaying so many things at the same time. Now we’re
talking about Buhle.
Me: “Can I get dressed first and brush my teeth, plusmy
wife is still sleeping. We don’t want to wake her up now,
do we mama?”
The smile I give her aggravates her, God really went
out with this one. My jaw drops when she pulls the
blanket off of us and throws it on the floor, this is the
highest level of abuse. It’s a good thing we’re dressed.
Rose slowly opens her eyes, she blinks once, closes
them and curls into a ball as she fallsback to sleep
much to Mariam’s irritation.
Mariam: “The living room, now and wake this
Godzilla of yours.”
She did not just compare my wife to a Godzilla, unhappy
with her statement I follow her to the kitchen, right after
covering Rose up. My mother canonly dream of having the
beauty my wife has.
Me: “What was that about mama?”
She frowns at my question and replies with a tongueclick.
Mariam: “That girl that was here yesterday, is shethe
one you had paid to sleep with your brother?”
Me: “Yes.”
Mariam: “I have always known that you’re stupid Sabelo,
of all the girls in Soweto, you had to go for
street trash.”
Me: “Buhle was the perfect candidate mama.”
Mariam: “Then what went wrong? The plan was tofind
someone who will lure Bhekifa out of his marriage,
someone we can easily control. Not a baby mama who
thinks she has rights over a manbecause he left a seed
inside her fungus womb.”
Mariam? Heee! This woman spews nonsense,
abomination.
Me: “I don’t know what went wrong magriza, she
wasn’t like that at first.”
Mariam: “I don’t care, fix it. I will not be raising another
brat, get that idiot to back off. It’s bad enough that I don’t
have control over Bhekifa’s money and wena with your
idiocy add to my troubles.Fix it Sabelo, or you and I will
have a big problem.”
She angrily storms out of the kitchen… Google stressand
you will find Mariam’s old wrinkled face next to the word.
-NELLY PAGE.

“Thabang hi, is my husband in?”

I ask Bhekifa’s personal assistant over the phone. Ineed
to make sure that he’s not at home before going there.
It’s lunch time and if I leave now, I will make it back to
the office before lunch is over.
Thabang: “He’s at a brunch meeting Mrs Zulu.”
Great.
Me: “Thank you Thabang, please don’t tell him I
called. I’m planning a surprise and I don’t want to
spoil anything.”
Thabang: “My lips are sealed.”
Oh I believe him alright… I make it out of the office and
drive down town, there’s no traffic, usually lunch hour
twins with morning rush hour. I get to the house in less
than 10 minutes, my ears and eyes areon autopilot… Alert
to the T… any sounds or movements, I would spot it before
my brain can relay
the message.

The kid’s documents are in my bedroom, I find themwith

no hassles. Why not pack some of my clothes and
important essentials as well? As I walk out of the
bedroom, the sound of a door shut stops my heart from
beating. It jumps to my throat, as the realization that my
husband is in the same house hits me. Bhekifa never uses
the kitchen entrance andwhenever he gets home, the first
room he goes to is the living room.
I might be able to escape him if I’m quick on my feet,
cautiously I walk down the flight of stairs. The coast is
clear… or not… like he knew where I was he slides in
front of me from the kitchen and flashes the biggest grin
that has shivers rippling through me.

cm®
To be continued©
“FIFTEEN”

NELLY PAGE.

I know that look on Bhekifa’s face, the destructive

expression, he is not a happy man.
Me: “What are you… doing here?”
I didn’t intend for my voice to tremble like this, it just
painted the fear in my heart and Bhekifa Zulu feeds on
fear. He hasn’t healed from the beating he got and here
he is, on attack mode.
Bhekifa: “Did you think you were going to hide fromme
forever mamakhe (wife)?”
His shoulders take a predatory bow, he puts his
hands on the rail of the stairs, caging me and his
fingers start tapping the wood in a furious beat.
Me: “I don’t want trouble Bhekifa, I came to get someof my
things.”
Bhekifa: “Well, this just goes to show that we’re
fated to be together. Little did I know that, my wifewould be
here.”
He says with a mocking tone.
Me: “Can I pass?”
The door is three feet away, I can make it out if hecould just
move.
Bhekifa: “You are not going anywhere wifey.”
His face flushes with rage before a cloud of warning
settles on his features.
Me: “My father knows that I’m here Bhekifa, if you try
anything you…”
His laugh breaks my words.
Bhekifa: “I don’t scare easily Nelly, you of all peopleshould
know that.”
Me: “I thought I did until I saw you being beaten upby a
man half your size.”
The words I choose start a war, the man frowns andhis
nose flares. He grabs my arm with ruthless pressure and
pulls me down the remaining three
steps, my bags tumble to the floor.
I stumble almost falling, but he grabs me and sendsme
flying with one hard slap. Naturally, a scream is pulled
out of my mouth. I take on survival mode, quickly pick
myself up and grab the vase displayed on the table. He
ducks as I throw it at him, the piecesscatter on the tiled
floor.
Bhekifa: “You’re throwing things at me now Nelly?”

He spits out the words, walking to me with anger inhis

eyes. My stomach clenches when he cracks hisknuckles.
Me: “I’m simply defending myself.”
He laughs.
Bhekifa: “Like you did at your mother’s house whenyou
poured hot water on me?”
Me: “Survival first, you taught me that.”
This time he smirks.
Bhekifa: “I’m going to put you in your place mkami
(wife), you need to remember who wears the pantsin
this house.”
His tone becomes chilly, his voice stern with no
sympathy and I know if I don’t leave this house now,I
might never walk out alive. My feet move me towards the
kitchen, I hear his feet thundering behind me.
There’s a saying, never show your enemies your back,
but I can’t afford to turn in this case. I’m afraidI will meet
a punch on my face.
The knife stand is at close range, a large hand furiously
grips my wrist as I reach for a particular knife. He turns
me around and I kick him on the nutsat a second’s notice.
He falls on his knees, groaningin pain, this gives me a
chance to run to the door.
The kitchen door to be precise, it’s closer and dammit,
it’s locked. I can’t find the key, so I jumpover an injured
Bhekifa and run to use the livingroom door.
Me: “Why are you doing this?”
I scream while trying to open the locked door, I’m
reminded of my bags that fell on the stairs. My keysare in
there. As I turn Bhekifa punches me on the jawthat I feel it
twist. I’m back on the floor, blooding spewing out of my
mouth. There’s nothing on my mind, but getting out of the
house…

If only I could get to the car… if only I could get to the

car… the words repeat in my head like a broken record as
I gather strength to pull myself up. My chinthrobs with
pain, my head hurts. Just as I make it tomy knees Bhekifa
kicks me on the stomach.
I bend over sharply and drops of blood spatter on the
wooden tiles. He feels he hasn’t had enough, sohe goes
for another kick and another one and addsthe forth one
just for control. Because he is BhekifaZulu, he feeds on
women’s weakness.
Bhekifa: “Ushaya mina Nelly? Umageba? Do you
know who I am?” (You’re hitting me?)
He shouts in my ear after laying his hand around myneck,
my hands grab his wrist to pull him away, however his
grip is too strong and too tight that it
deprives me of air. He brings me up by my neck, pinsme
on the wall.
His eyes are burning with rage, an animalistic expression
has taken over him. I can’t recognise theman who is
looking back at me, he smirks pressing his hand on my
neck. I get the feeling of suffocating,my lungs are caving
in. I try to tell him I can’t breathe,but I can’t speak. My
eyes roll up, his face blurs as I feel a fade away. I hear his
mocking laugh, he’s having a good time at my expense.

Bhekifa: “It would be better if you were dead, it’s theonly

way we’ll solve this problem we have.”
His words splinter inside my heart causing more pain
than the one he is inflicting on me physically, Idon’t
want to die. I have children, they can’t grow upwithout
their mother.
Bhekifa: “But not now.”
He says and releases my neck, I come crushing down
with a loud thud. My eyes find the door, in myhead I see
myself walking out and driving to my
father’s house where I will feel safe. It’s just wishful
thinking.

I’m lying face down and on my stomach unable to move,

Bhekifa squats beside me. He starts strokingmy hair,
gently and with care. This is the possessiveness I spoke of,
he’s feels he has a claimover me only because I said “I
do” all those years ago.
Bhekifa: “All I wanted from you was for you to respect
me, Nelly. Was I asking for too much? Why must you be
so unfair? Why must you treat me like Imean nothing to
you? First you pack your things, take kids, my kids Nelly
and leave my house.”
His tone is vicious.
Bhekifa: “Those kids are Zulu, they belong to the
Zulus not Magwazas. I have rights over them, notyour
parents.”
He bangs his fists on my head with these words, Iscream
in agony, it feels like my scalp is going tocrack.
Bhekifa: “It’s okay dali wam, I’m only trying to knock
some sense into this hard head of yours.” (My darling.)
He bangs my head again harder this time, as he saysthe
last words, it’s so loud that I swear I feel my brain shake.
Me: “Ngi… ngiyacela babakhe… ngiya… cela…
Mageba. Ngixolele.” (I’m sorry my husband, forgive
me.)
Knowing Bhekifa, soft talk cools him down. Let him feel the
love he craves for and he will soften up like abig teddy bear.
Me: “I… was angry, I’m sorry. I didn’t… have the right…
to… be angry with you, I didn’t have the right to walkout
on you.”
If I will go to hell for lying then let it be so, as long asI
make it today.
Bhekifa: “That’s right, you had no right. You shouldbe
submissive to me as your husband, I say jumpand you
ask how high.”
He has resorted to tapping on my head with his knuckles,
it’s still painful. My head hurts like hell andI think he
broke my ribs.
Me: “Please hold me Mageba, I need you to holdme.”

-SABELO ZULU.

Mariam has been checking the time on her watch, her

body and facial features are expectant and she has grown
anxious. The couch should complain rightabout now… I’m
growing annoyed by her uneasiness.
Me: “Are you waiting for the lotto numbers mama?”
She eyes me with a cold look, Mariam loves clickingher
tongue by the way.
Me: “Maybe I might be able to help you if you tell mewhat’s
wrong.”
Mariam: “I can’t stop thinking about Bhekifa.”I
didn’t expect this one.
Me: “Bhekifa is an old man, just in case you forgot.”
Mariam: “I’m sure you know that I have been seeinga
sangoma.” (Traditional healer.)
Me: “I knew it, I can read you like a book mama. Soyou’re
bewitching your son?”
Mariam: “I’m not a witch, stupid child. I had to put your
brother in place, you know Nelly’s family prays. Ihate that, I
hated that from the beginning and I knew she was going to
cause us nothing but trouble.”
Like I said…
Me: “You are a witch mama, only witches hate
Christians. I hope you haven’t done anything to mywife,
I like Rose the way she is. She is perfect for me.”
Mariam throws a cushion my way, I catch it before ithits me
on the face.
Mariam: “Rose is the witch here, why do you think
you’re so obsessed with her?”
Me: “My Rose? Never shame, not that beautiful woman.
Witchcraft is for ugly people, like that ugly
friend of yours Mpontseng. Yeyi, that woman was a
mistake. I’m sure her parents are still complaining to
God.”
For once Mariam smiles at my words.
Mariam: “Stop talking nonsense and listen to me, the
sangoma said Bhekifa is going to do something to Nelly
and that will be the final cut to their cursed marriage.”
Me: “You mean kill her?”
Mariam: “I hope not, he wasn’t specific. I’m nervousSabelo,
I don’t want him to kill her.”
Me: “You’re worried about Nelly now?”
Mariam: “I’m worried about your brother, Nelly cango
to hell. As long as it’s not my son who sends herthere.”
Well Bhekifa going to jail won’t be such a bad thing.
Me: “Relax and trust your sangoma friend, those
people always know what they are doing.”
I hope Bhekifa slaughters that Nelly woman.
-NELLY PAGE.

I loathe the day I married this monster. He agrees tomy

request. I can’t say the tears have also worked inmy favour,
tears mean nothing to Bhekifa.
He slips his hands under my armpits and slides me up
into his arms. He starts stroking my back, gentlyand
whispering words of comfort in my ear. I’m lyingin the
arms of a lion who used to be a lamb, the manI was
comfortable with and trusted enough to give him heirs.
The man I loved beyond words.

Me: “It hurts Bhekifa when you’re holding me like this,

please take me to the couch.”
I plead, trying to sound strong since my tears are useless.
I’m disgusted by the kiss he places on myforehead after he
scoops me up in his arms, he’s looking into my eyes… his
are cold… emotionless and diabolical.
Bhekifa: “I love you mkami, I will love you till death.”
My stomach turns at the sound of his words, there isno
meaning to the declaration. It’s just empty words of a sick
human. He is gentle when he places me onthe couch, my
body is fragile right now. I feel like I might break.
Me: “Thank you.”
It’s hard to speak, but I have to force myself, I hug my
tummy and groan in pain. I have seen this survival
technique on one of the crime shows, makeyour attacker
think you’re on their side. Do whateveryou can to get them
to believe you, it’s easier whenyou know their weakness.
Me: Please get me a glass of water, my throat isdry.”
He frowns and gives me a suspicious look.
Bhekifa: “You know I love you, right?”
Surprisingly, I haven’t shed a tear. I’m too angry forthat.
Bhekifa: “I said I love you, Nelly.”
He snaps, it’s the first time hearing such beautifulwords said
with vile intentions.
Me: “I know.”
Bhekifa: “You know?”
He’s angry again.
Me: “I love you too dali.”
He grins, it’s a creepy one. My eyes follow him as hewalks
to the kitchen, this is my chance to slip out ofthe house.
The palm of my hand opens, revealing the key I snatched
from his pocket when he was hugging meon the floor.
Bhekifa is still washing the glass, he has an OCD,
nothing deep.

It feels like my intestines are ripping with each moveI take,

I make it down the couch nonetheless. I see him in the
kitchen behind the sink.
In pain and struggling to walk, I drag my feet towards
the door. I clip the key in, it makes a littlenoise as I twist
it, but opens still.
There is no time to grab my bag, hope rises as the breeze
from outside touches my face. It smells like freedom, the
feeling doesn’t last when I’m pulled back with so much
force. My stubbornness won’t letmy feet completely move
back so I fall flat on the doorstep.
My eyes find the husband, he’s angry. Angrier than
anything I have ever seen.
Bhekifa: “You think I’m stupid huh, you think I’m
stupid?”
He shouts, kicking me on the stomach. I’m groaningon the
floor like a dying goat, my gaze is on the roadahead. I’m
praying that someone might pass, this road is always busy
with, people passing by. Bhekifagrabs my legs and starts
pulling me into the house, Igrab the security gate and hold
on for dear life. I willnot be going back in there.
Bhekifa: “Stop being stubborn, you’re not goinganywhere.”
Me: “Bhe… ki…”
Strength leaves me, just when all hope is lost three
people walk past. Me:
“He… help… me.”
I manage a whisper and notice the husband hasn’tseen
them, he’s too focused on pulling me into thehouse. The
people spot us and stop, there are twomen and a woman.
“Hey, what’s going on there?”
One of the men shouts, the grip on my legs is gone.Me:
“Help me.”
Only now my tears decide to come out to play, it’smore
like tears of joy.
Bhekifa: “Shit.”
I hear him curse.
“He’s beating up a woman, he’s beaten up a
woman.”
One of the men is shouting at the top of his lungs, he’s
shouting for the whole neighbourhood to hear,while the
others run inside the gate. I’m still lying onmy stomach,
too weak to move. Bhekifa thinks he
can explain his way out of this, these men look readyto
attack.

I see more people coming men and women. Someare

carrying shovels, some frying pans and othersweapons I
can’t make out. I hear Bhekifa gasp before running
towards the backyard.

To be continued©
“SIXTEEN"

BHEKIFA ZULU.

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The angry mob is after me, I managed to hide behinda

house next door. We have a gate in the back yard that
leads there. I can hear their angry voices, there is no way
out for me.
Me: “What have you done Bhekifa?”
How did I become this monster? Nelly doesn’t
deserve what I did to her. A man appears with a
brick on his hand, he widens his eyes at me.
“I found him, he’s this side.”
He shouts for the others, strange how people feel
empowered when they stand in unison. He blocks my
way when I try to move past him.
Me: “Get out of my way you idiot.”
He pushes me back and smashes the brick on myhead,
the force sends me on the ground. Screams
break out as more of them come. The crowd rushes
forward, shouting “get him, get him.” Before I know it,
I’m curled up on the ground and these people arebeating
me to a pulp.
I feel kicks, punches, blunt objects on my head. There is
so much force in every blow, as if to smashme into the
ground. Memories of my wife curled up like this on the
floor haunt me, my heart breaks. Thisis what Nelly must
have felt, helpless with no way out. I couldn’t understand
then. What kind of a monster have I become? I almost
killed the mother of my children, my wife.

Me: “Please stop, stop.”

I scream, using my arms to shield myself from the
beatings. A blunt object comes for my abdomen, theblow
sends blood up my throat and out of my mouth.
“You think you will hit a woman and we will let yougo?”
A male voice barks, the mob agrees with him,
attacking me in all corners and leaving no stone
unturned.
“Kill him, he deserves to die.”
My head spins as one of them kicks me on the face,I push
myself on my knees to try to stand. I need toget out of
here or I will die. The attack is fierce and deadly. My
eyes find a brick on the ground, I quickly grab it and
shout.
Me: “Stop!”
While raising my hand ready to throw it at anyone, some
guy kicks my hand and the brick tumbles to the ground.
The same guy kicks me on the face, myhead jerks back
and instantly blood spatters from my mouth. I tilt my
head to spit it out.
The technique I use to curl my body proves to be futile,
I’m unable to protect myself. There is one option left and
that is to play dead, I feel a fist land on my gut and
someone comes with a leg. It lands on my chest and
chokes me almost to death, this ismy chance. I hit the
ground face first and pretend tohave fainted.
“Let him go, look at him. He’s badly injured.”
The bastard is right, I can’t even breathe. I don’t know
who says this, but they agree with him. I listento their
footsteps as they stomp away from me andwait it out for
about a minute. Just in case they arestill in the premises.

NELLY PAGE.

Today I almost lost my life in the hands of my husband, if

it were not for the people walking past, Idon’t know what
would have become of me. Bhekifawas bent on killing me,
the monster in him was fullyunleashed. He killed my soul,
I can still feel his hands tightened around my neck. The
sound of his groaning as he strangled me like I were a
piece of clothing he can wring. The memory floods my
mindlike water rushing into a sinking ship. What if I will
never be able to escape him, he will always find a way to
get to me.

“Where is she?”
That’s my father’s voice, he’s yelling down the corridor.
This is a public hospital and they don’t tolerate nonsense,
he can’t be a starring here. There are about four more
beds in this ward, three patientsare fast asleep and one
has been staring at the ceiling since I opened my eyes.
My heart skips when I see my father walk through the
door, my mother follows behind him. Tears escape
through my swollen eyes, I want to hide in his arms and
cry my heart out. However I can’t move,I’m still in so
much pain.
My father stands on my bedside with a clenched jaw,tears
flood behind his eyes.
Mom: “Oh my child, what has happened to you?”
My mother is crying, she knows what happened tome,
the nurse told her over the phone.
My father grabs a chair and sits. He takes my handinto
his.
Dad: “I’m going to kill him.”
He seethes through closed teeth, my mother does
what she does best and that is comfort her husband.He
sighs in frustration when she places a hand on his
shoulder, the frustration is not directed toward his wife,
but the guilt I see in his eyes.

Dad: “Look what that boy did to my baby.”

He’s talking to his wife by the way, funny how theydon’t
address each other by name.
Mom: “Can you talk?”
I can, I want to tell her, I can. But my throat hurts andthere’s
an uncomfortable feeling grazing it.
Me: “Bhe… ki…”
Dad: “We know he did this to you.”I
want him arrested.
Mom: “Why did you go there alone Nelly? You should
have called me.”
Should’ve? I hate this word, what’s done is done. Wecan’t
change what has happened.
Me: “Police.”
The word drags out of my mouth, it hurts when I
speak.
Dad: “You want him arrested?”I
nod.
Dad: “Consider it done, we’ll also get a restraining
order against him.”
Mom: “A restraining order is enough, but what willwe
tell the kids when their father goes to jail?”
She can’t be serious.
Dad: “Those kids are old enough to understand,
Bhekifa Zulu will be spending the night in prison.”
I trust my father to protect me, my mother will not argue
with him. She never does, his word is final andshe knows
it.

-CHERYL ZIKHALI.

Someone walks into my tent, everyone who comesin

here is protected from head to toe. It makes it
hard for me to differentiate between doctors and nurses, I
have asked, but was given no answer. I’m not sure about
the rules and regulations of this place,I think the staff is not
allowed to converse with the patients.
I’ll go crazy if I don’t say something, my mind wantsto
release the words I have held captive. Maybe I won’t have
to say anything, this man is looking at me.It’s a long
uncomfortable glare, I jump from the bed and step back.
The fact that I can’t see who is
behind that mask creeps me out a little, now to havethe
person staring the way they are.

Me: “Is something wrong?”

He nods positively and places a finger against his
mouth, gesturing that I keep quiet. This is getting
strange, my eyes scan the spacious tent for any
weapon I can use to defend myself.
“I’m here to take you away.”
He whispers, sending my body on a shockwave. Itlocks
up as my heart jumps to my throat, I’m not
afraid of ghosts. I’ve never been, but humans creepme
out, you never know what they are thinking. Thehuman
mind can release deadly desires, even God Himself must
wonder how we can be so much likethe devil.
Me: “Who are you? I’m going to scream.”
He shakes his head, I wish he would just come outwith it
already.
Me: “What do you want?”
He’s coming closer, there is no way out and he’s
standing between me and the exit. I can hear myheart
pushing against my ribcage.
Me: “Hel...”
I don’t complete the word because he jumps to cover my
mouth, his arm circles my waist to hold mestill. I kick and
try to bite his hand, but he’s stronger.
“Calm down Nkosi, it’s me.”
That voice, I know it.
“It’s Jabu.”
He says as he gently moves away from me, he takes the
mask off and a grin welcomes me. I want to wipeit off with
a slap.

Me: “What is your problem? You almost gave me aheart

attack.”
Nonsense, the fool is laughing.
Jabu: “The plan was to scare you and damn, I didn’t
think it would work.”
Me: “Not funny, not funny.”
The smile on his face vanishes so fast, you’d think itwas
fake.
Jabu: “Listen, we have to get out of here, everythingis a
lie. Sia having the virus, us being put under quarantine.
It’s all a façade.”
Me: “I don’t understand.”
Jabu: “My cousin Nkateko works for the governmentas an
undercover agent, he wasn’t okay with the factthat I was
held under quarantine with no symptomsof the virus. He
went and investigated, these people
are not real doctors. They work for some Chinesehuman
trafficking syndicate that is operating between South
Africa and Zimbabwe.”
My head spins… Sia…
Me: “Where is Sia”
The question trembles out of my mouth in a whisper,my
heart does that thing it did when I thought Jabu was a
stranger who came to attack me.

Jabu: “I don’t want to lie to you Cheryl, Nkateko said

there’s a possibility that she is being shipped to China as
we speak.”
Me: “Please tell me this is a prank Jabu, tell me,you’re
joking please.”
My chest tightens, fear engulfs me.
Jabu: “I’m sorry, it’s not confirmed yet. He’s lookinginto
it, we have to get out of here. They will kill us ifthey find
out that we know, we have to go now.”
I can’t move, my feet won’t let me.
Me: “My baby, they have my baby.”
Jabu: “I know you’re shocked and hurting right now,but
we can’t stay here. Your mother and Earth are ontheir
way home, my cousin sent us some of his men.There’s a
car waiting for us a few yards from these premises.”
Jabu’s voice becomes background sounds, I’m frozen
with shock. Seeing that I’m not moving, Jabugrabs my
hand and starts dragging me towards theexit. All I can do
is accommodate the tears runningdown my face.

-BHEKIFA ZULU.

There is no one in sight, the place is as quiet as a suburb.

I don’t see Nelly as I limp my way past the front door.
Darn those idiots, it takes forever for meto get to the car.
The insurance company came through with a substitute
while my car went for
repairs.
I need to call my brother, I won’t be able to drive likethis.
Locking the car doors is best, or perhaps I should drive to
the nearest mall and park there. Whatif those savages
come back to finish me? They did leave me for dead.
The pain has me tearing up, I think they broke my
bones and I have a headache ordered from hell.
“Sabelo… you… have to help me.”
I cry to my brother as he answers the phone.
Sabelo: “Bafoza, what happened? You sound likeyou’re
crying.”
I don’t sound like I’m crying, I am crying.
Me: “They beat me up… Sabelo.”
I can’t stop crying, this is not me. I don’t cry, I nevershed a
tear.
Sabelo: “Who?”
There is panic in his voice.
Me: “Nelly and I were having an argument, the
neighbours saw us and they beat me up.”The
line goes quiet for a while.
Me: “Sabelo, are you there?”
Sabelo: “Yes, I’m here. Where are you? Come home.”
Me: “I won’t be able to drive, I’m badly injured and I
can’t drive to the hospital. What if Nelly has called the
police on me?”
Sabelo: “Why would she do that? You’re the one whowas
thrashed not her, unless you…”
He indulges in silence again.
Sabelo: “You beat your wife up bafo?”
Me: “Please come get me, I’m going to die Sabelo.I’m
going to die alone.”
I’m confused by his laughter, I’m in pain and he’s
laughing at me.
Sabelo: “You’re not going die hawu Bhekifa.”He
continues laughing.
Me: “Just come and get me.”
I sniff, wiping my tears away.
Sabelo: “Hang in there, I’ll ask a friend to drop meoff.”

My mother’s house is not too far from where I live, I have

to hide in the car until my brother gets here. I have
embarrassed myself again, got beaten up twicein a week.
In less than fifteen minutes a white Kia Picantoparks
in front of me, my brother jumps out andwaves at the
driver who drives off in full speed.
Relieved to see a familiar face, I get out of the car tomeet
him. I guess I must be a fool to expect a hand from him
because he studies me with his eyes before bursting out in
laughter. I watch him as he laughs until he falls butt down
on the grass. I will diehere while he is mocking me with
that loud sound.

cm®
To be continued©
"SEVENTEEN"

SABELO ZULU.

It is so unlike my brother to be sensitive, Mariam hasdone

her worst on her son. I wish I could say I feel for him, I’m
actually enjoying the show. Bhekifa insisted that I help
him into the house, he doesn’t want our mother to see him
in the state he is in. I should take pictures just for control.
Bhekifa: “Please lock the door, just in case thosepeople
come back.”
He tells me as I help him to the couch, I do as told.Me:
“Do you need anything else?”
Bhekifa: “Yes, I need help with dressing thesewounds or
else I will die in my sleep.”
His answer makes me laugh.
Bhekifa: “What is this bafo? Do you enjoy seeing mein
pain?”
The seriousness on his face makes me laugh evenlouder,
I have to sit down for this.
Me: “I’m sorry bafo, it’s just that I have never seen you
like this and it’s funny that you think you’re goingto die
from minor wounds.”
Bhekifa: “Minor wounds? Do you not see what theydid
to me, Sabelo?”
Me: “Yes, but you’re exaggerating it nawe.”
Bhekifa: “Haibo ndoda, they smashed my head witha
brick. I could have a concussion.”
Me: “I think you should go to the hospital.”
Bhekifa: “I can’t, the police are probably looking forme.”
Me: “If they were, then they would find you here.”
He didn’t think of that, there’s a sudden knock as heopens
his mouth to speak.
Bhekifa: “Don’t open it.”
He’s stupid.
Me: “Phola bafo, phola.” (Relax.)
What if it is the police? I don’t want to go to jail forholding
a prisoner.
Bhekifa: “Sabelo stop.”
Bhekifa shouts, but I don’t listen to him. I’m met bytwo
policemen as I open the door.
Me: “Bantu bomthetho.” (Officers.)
I greet with a smile and my heart dances to the
thought of Bhekifa going to jail.
Cop: “Bhekifa Zulu?”
God is good.
Me: “He’s here, please come in.”
I turn to find him standing on his feet.
Cop: “Are you Bhekifa Zulu?”
I see pain in his eyes as my brother looks at me, hefeels
betrayed. He nods to the officer, reluctantly.
Cop: “Your wife Nelly Zulu has laid charges againstyou,
you are under arrest for domestic violence.”
Me: “What?”
Time to put up an act.
Me: “My brother would never do that poyisa (police),look
at him. He’s clearly injured, the only person whoshould be
laying charges here is him.”
Cop: “If your brother wants to open a case he will doit at
the station, we have to do our job and take himin.”
Bhekifa looks defeated as the officer handcuffs him,it
would have been fun to watch him resist arrest.
Me: “Please get him a doctor first, he won’t survivethe
night with these injuries.”
Bhekifa: “Call my PA bafo and tell him to call mylawyer.”
Bhekifa shouts to me as they walk him out, maybe his
mother will call his PA, I will wait it out a day ortwo.

-CHERYL ZIKHALI.
Jabu drove us to his house in Diepkloof extension after
fetching my mother and Earth from our house.Nkateko is
apparently tailing the people that have Sia. It’s been too
long and nothing has come up yet.
Jabu: “You should go to bed, I’ll wake you up whenhe
calls.”
Me: “No, I will wait here with you. I won’t be able to
sleep.”
He takes the TV remote and turns down the volume.Me:
“You want to sit in awkward silence?”
Jabu: “We never have those, your mother and Earthare
sleeping.”
Me: “My mother sleeps like a rock.”
He moves to sit next to me, grabs my legs from thecouch
and places them on his lap. The act has mefrowning in
confusion.
Jabu: “Relax, this will help you.”
He’s massaging my feet, it feels good. I lean back onthe
couch and relax like he said.
Me: “So, your cousin is James Bond?”He
laughs.
Jabu: “You could say that.”
Me: “I thought those things happen only on TV. Howlong
has he been working as an agent?”
Jabu: “I don’t know, he’s an undercover agent and noone
in the family knows about it. I found out by accident, I
heard him talking to his boss over the phone.”
Me: “Do you think he will find Sia?”
Jabu: “I know he will, I trust him. He’s put many
assassins behind bars, I don’t know anyone who hasso
many enemies in jail like Nkateko does. It’s a good thing
no one knows the face behind the undercover agent.”
Me: “How long do you think it will take for him to findher?
What if Sia has crossed the boarders, Jabu? If that’s the
case, then I will never see my child again.”
I can’t stomach the thought.
Jabu: “You know this massage is meant to help you
relax, not stress you further. I told you, Nkateko is onit. I
trust him and I need you to trust him as well.”
It is easier said than done. How does a mother
comfort her bleeding heart?

-SABELO ZULU.

{Aw thuza skorokoro.}

{Aw pusha skorokoro.}
{Pusha didang, pusha.}
{Aw push, push, push.}
{Pusha didang.}

My mother stops what she’s doing in the kitchenwhen

I walk in dancing and singing, she frowns atme,
folding her arms across her chest.
Mariam: “And then wena?” (What is with you?)
Me: “Life is nice magriza.” (Granny.)
I spin in a dance and pull her hand to join me… because
she is Mariam and has no life left in her, theold woman
pushes me away.
Mariam: “Voetsek. What are you happy about?” (Pissoff.)
Me: “Yoh, yoh, yoh! Mama, you won’t believe what
happened.”
I can’t wait for her to hear this, she inquisitively looksat
me.
Me: “Your son decided to beat up his wife.”
Mariam: “This is the reason you’re so happy?”
Why is she frowning like that? I should get my mother
a man, I can’t stand living with a frustratedwoman.
Me: “Listen, I’m not done.”
Her response is a tongue click, I’m not bothered.
Me: “You constantly tell me that I’m the stupid son,turns
out you have two. Bhekifa, my dear brother
beat his wife in public mama. Right where the worldcould
see and guess what they did. They attacked him.”
Mariam: “What?”
Okay, I didn’t expect the scream.
Me: “I’m telling you, bricks were flying left, right andcentre.
They went Jackie Chan on him.”
Mariam: “What are you telling me, Sabelo? How ismy
son?”
Her question takes me back to the phone call whenhe
was crying and I try to hold the laugh that’s tickling me,
but fail dismally.
Mariam: “Why are you laughing? Where is my son?”My
mother shouts, she’s too dramatic.
Me: “He’s fine, relax. The police took him, yourdaughter in-
law got him arrested.”
Mariam: “I am going to deal with that girl, I swearshe
won’t see me coming.”
Me: “Hiabo magriza, this is what you wanted moes.
You said the sangoma…”
Mariam: “Shut up, you fool. You’re celebrating your
brother’s downfall, are you crazy?”
Me: “I thought it’s what we wanted.”
Mariam: “How many times do I have to tell you thatthe
war is between Nelly and us not Bhekifa? I wanthim out of
jail today Sabelo, you’re going to fix this.”
Listen to this old woman.
Me: “Let him spend a night or two hau mama.”I
duck as she throws a wooden spoon at me.
Mariam: “Get your brother out or you and your familywill
leave my house.”
Me: “You’re being personal now magriza.” (Granny.)
Mariam: “I’m serious Sabelo, you don’t want to testme.”
Me: “Why magriza? Why? Can’t you let me be happyfor
once?”
Mariam: “Pap and cabbage will make you happy
when your brother is locked up, who will buy you
food? Who do you think pays for this house?”I
didn’t think of that.
Me: “Okay mama, I’ll contact his lawyer. Eyy but youshould
have heard a grown man cry. Sabelo I don’twant to die, I’m
going to die bafo.”
My mother narrows her eyes at me as I imitate Bhekifa
and burst into laughter, this is the highlightof my week. I
should have taken a video.

-NELLY PAGE.

I haven’t heard anything from Bhekifa, going outsidehas

been a struggle. I had to stay locked up in my father’s
house, afraid that I might bump into him.
Bhekifa was released three days after his arrest,money
really does make things happen.
His lawyer cried domestic violence, claiming I had beat
my husband up and because we were both injured we
walked away with nothing but a slap onthe wrist. The
neighbours who witnessed the abuse
and were responsible for Bhekifa’s injuries were tooafraid
to come forward. No one wants to find themselves in court
testifying to a crime they were involved in. My father got
me a straining order against Bhekifa, my lawyer is still
working on the divorce papers.

There’s a knock on my bedroom door, my motherwalks in

after.
Mom: “Your father took the kids to school.”
I sit up from the bed, my wounds are healing, but myheart
is still heavy and broken.
Me: “Thank you ma.”
Mom: “I made soft porridge, come and join me.”Me:
“I’m not hungry.”
Mom: “That’s what you said last night, you have to
eat.”
I can’t stomach anything at the moment, my
stomach turns when I put food in my mouth.
Me: “I’ll eat later, how is Ayanda?”
She’s upset with me because I wouldn’t let her meether
father, she is a child and doesn’t understand what’s going
on.
Mom: “Don’t worry about her, your father will talk toher.
Bhekifa’s uncle called, they are coming this weekend.”
The meeting with his family is still to take place, I’mnot up
for it. I know they will force me to go back tomy marital
home.

“Sanibonani ek’seni.” (Good morning.)

My brother Thokozani walks in with a smile on hisface,
my mother’s day has been made. A light scream leaves
her mouth as she hurries to hug herson, he’s tall that
she has to stand on her toes.
Thokozani chuckles lightly before letting go.
Zani: “Qhawekazi.” (Queen.)
Mom: “You don’t love me anymore, six months Zani.
Where have you been?”
Zani: “You know I go where amathonga lead me.”
(Ancestors.)
My mother sighs, being a Christian she was against my
brother accepting his spiritual gift. But it wasn’t her
choice to make, here he is doing just fine.
Zani: “Dadewethu.” (My sister.)
The smile on his face has vanished and worry takesover.
Me: “Zaza.”
My smile meets his, he has always hated me callinghim
that from the time I was a little girl, Thokozani isfive years
older than me. The age gap made us closer, we were
always together growing up.
Zani: “How are you?”
There is concern in his voice, I know my father toldhim
about Bhekifa.”
Me: “I’m here, alive.”
I make it out of bed to hug him, he suffocates me ina hug.
My legs hang down from the floor as he liftsme up.
Me: “Hayi Zaza, I can’t breathe.”
He laughs and puts me down.
Zani: “I was checking for any broken bones.”
Me: “I’m okay Bhuti.” (Brother.)
Mom: “You two talk while I make warm breakfast.”
I’m offered porridge and the baby boy gets an
English breakfast?
Zani: “Qhawekazi.”(Queen.)
My mother smiles at this declaration and leaves us.Me:
“Come sit.”

cm®
To be continued©
“EIGHTEEN”

NELLY PAGE.

Thokozani is studying me under his gaze, his eyes are

trailing the bruises on my face. His jaw clenchesand
unclenches as he reaches for my hand.
Zani: “Do you remember when you fell from a tree.”
I giggle at the memory and the seriousness in hisvoice, he
doesn’t smile, but keeps a frown instead.
Me: “You cut the tree down because you were angrythat I
sprained an ankle and dad punished you. You cut down a
forty year old tree Zaza.”
Zani: “You wouldn’t stop crying and that was the onlyway
to make you stop.”
Me: “And I did.”
He sighs, heavily.
Zani: “Remember the promise I made to you?”
Me: “That you will always protect me from anythingand
anyone.”
Zani: “And remember what I told you the day you got
married?”
Me “If my husband ever touches me you will turnhim
into a monkey?”
He laughs, that’s not what he actually said.
Thokozani has always been overprotective.
Zani: “I said I will kill Bhekifa if he ever lays a fingeron
you.”
I sigh at his words, I remember him uttering them.
Me “He changed Bhuti, he became an animal. I never
thought Bhekifa would ever do that to me.”
Zani: “Yeah, people change Nelly. I’m glad you lefthim,
you deserve better than that him.”
Me: “I know, but how do I stop loving him? Bhekifahas
hurt me so much and I wish I could stop hatinghim. I
hate myself for loving him like I do and I’m afraid Zaza.
It terrifies me that I will go back to himlike I always did,
is it strange that I love him like I
do?”
Zani “You’re human, no one expects you to be
perfect.”
Me “I only wanted the best for my kids, I tried my best to
keep them from having a weekend special dad. Bhekifa is
good with them, but I fear that he willchange and turn his
back on them.”
I don’t know about the boys, but Ayanda will be
devastated.
Zani: “Why does it sound like you want to go back to
him?”
Me: “My mind is entertaining the thought, but my willhas
me grounded.”
Zani: “Thank God for your will, now tell your mind tostop.
Bhekifa put his hands on you, who is to say hewon’t kill
you next time?”
The old Bhekifa wouldn’t, but this new man whose
hobby is to make me cry lacks sympathy, compassion
and his heart has grown cold.
Zani: “For the sake of your kids, you will forget about
Bhekifa. Women are murdered by the very same men who
promised to love and protect them, remember Tshegofatso
Pule’s case not so long ago?At eight months pregnant, the
father of her unborn baby ordered for her murder. She
was stabbed and hung on a tree. Karabo Mokoena was
killed by her ex
-boyfriend. I’m pretty sure none of these women sawit
coming, you didn’t see it coming Nelly. A woman iskilled
every three hours in South Africa, that’s five times the
world average. You’re lucky neighbours saw you that day,
or else we would be mourning yourdeath.”
His words get to me, my heart feels heavy and sinksto pit
of my stomach. I can’t fathom the thought of my kids
losing their mother.
Me: “How do I get away from him? He seems toknow
where I am.”
Zani: “Don’t worry, we’re going to fix this.”
Me: “I hope you’re not talking about murder.”
Oops! Me and my big mouth, he gives me a disappointed
look before sighing in frustration.
Zani: “I don’t belong to myself Nelly, the ancestors lead
me. How will I show my face to them with bloodstained
hands?”
Me: “I’m sorry Zaza, I spoke out of context.”
He gives me a faint smile, it vanishes as fast as itcame.
Zani: “Uyaphapha that’s why.” (You’re too forward.)
I shoot him with a wide grin and wrap my arms
around him.
Me: “I love you too.”
I hear him chuckle before holding me back, thingsseem to be
easy now that he’s here.

-NKATEKO MATHEBULA.

I’m lost in thought that I don’t hear the kettle boiling, this
kettle is so old that I have to switch it off for thewater to
stop boiling. I need to get a new one… Beinga bachelor is
not always fun, bad news for those
who wish for it. I live alone in Johannesburg CBD, I
would describe myself as a lone walker. Friends arethe
last thing I crave for in life and my heart is too broken to
entertain a woman.

When my cousin Jabu told me that he was under

quarantine with no symptoms of the virus, I knew this
was my chance to crack the case I have been following
for years. The case is personal to me, mywife was
abducted five years ago in Thailand. We were
newlyweds and had saved ourselves for our wedding
night, Kulani was twenty two. Too trustfulof the world, I
would like to believe that she was naïve. I loved her
regardless…

The night she was abducted is as clear in my headas the

blue sky, we were at a restaurant, it was packed but we
didn’t mind the crowd. Kulani kept complaining about
the heat, being asthmatic she started hyperventilating.
Our waitress was taking forever to come.
The other staff we’re too busy to assist us, I had toget up
to find anyone who can get us a glass of water. It took a
second, just a second for me to turnmy back and she was
gone. I went crazy searchingfor her in the crowded
restaurant, the manager hadto ask me to leave as I was
distracting the customers.
The police were of no help, I was told to go home, they
would call me if anything came up. I died that night, spent
the whole night searching for her on thestreets. I took the
news to social media.
There was no news of her and when my visa expired,I had
to go back home without my bride. The South African
police turned a blind eye to my plea, the woman was
abducted in Thailand and there was nothing they could
do.

That’s when I was approached by a guy from

Mozambique, Stephen Jacobs. He also lost his fifteen
year old sister to sex trafficking. Stephen introduced me
to a secretive group that dealt with
bringing down the syndicate.
Months after joining them Kulani’s body was foundat a
motel in Malawi, she was naked from waist down.
Which indicated that she was raped, her throat was slit
open. Her face battered, I almost couldn’t recognise
her.
Anger brewed inside me that day, I have been bayingfor
their blood and one day my thirst will be quenched. I
failed my wife, I will not fail Sia.

-BHEKIFA ZULU.

“Mr. Zulu.”
I raise my eyes to find Cheryl standing in the doorway of
my office.
Me: “Yes?”
She walks in, a cup of what I think is coffee is in herhand.
Cheryl: “Mam’Susan said you take your coffee with a
teaspoon of sugar and a dash of milk.”
Me: “Have you been promoted to tea lady?” She
smiles, her smile lights up my gloomy day.
Me: “Don’t tell anyone, but I have been aftermam’Su’s
job. Making tea is art, I swear.”
I manage a quick chuckle, she puts the cup on mydesk.
Me: “Thank you.”
Her eyes are all over my face, I reckon she’s lookingat the
bruises and scars.
Cheryl: “Did you get the people who did this to you?”
Rumour has it in the office that I was mugged and left for
dead, it’s amazing what people can cook up. Ilet them
believe whatever they want.
Me: “I don’t know, I haven’t been keeping tabs on the
investigation.”
Lies… may those fools burn in hell.
Cheryl: “It’s sad how humans can be so heartless,you
know the universe states that you actually
attracted whatever is happening to you?”
This is the second time hearing her talk about theuniverse.
Me: “I disagree, I would never attract such a terrible
thing.”
Another lie proudly leaves my mouth, Cheryl stands with
her arms folded across her chest. The look in her eyes has
called me a liar, she sees right throughme. She seems
different, offish and there is a sadness on her face.
Me: “You’re back early from quarantine.”
She shrugs her shoulders and looks away from me, Icould
swear I saw a tear escape her eye. She brushes it away
before I could make it out.
Me: “Cheryl.”
What the hell am I doing? My feet have led me to her,I
touch her shoulder and she looks up at me.
Me: “Is everything okay?”
She shakes her head, dropping her gaze to hide thetears
that are pushing to be seen. I think of
comforting her, but it won’t be appropriate at work.
Someone clears their throat, the sound is comingfrom
the door. I turn to find Thokozani, my wife’sbrother.
Suddenly, I’m sweating.

Zani: “Am I disturbing something?”

He walks in with these words.
Me: “Thokozani? When did you get back?” Zani:
“What right do you have to ask me that?”
He turns his gaze to Cheryl and a subtle smirk playsat his
lips.
Zani: “Nkosazana!” (Lady.)
He takes a light bow before raising his head to smileat
her.
Zani: “Please excuse us, my brother in-law and I have
important things to discuss.”
I expect Cheryl to talk back like I know her to, but shenods
with uttermost respect and quietly rushes out.
Part of me wishes she didn’t leave, Thokozani is not
kind to those who have crossed him and I fear the
reason behind his visit.
It’s not a second when the door shuts, Thokozani grips
my shoulder and punches me in the gut. Thepunch jolts
my breath from my lungs and out of mymouth in a gasp,
just as I’m about to ease into the pain, he throws
another punch on the same place. Igroan in pain before
a series of coughs evade frommy mouth, the pain has me
falling to my knees andcurling into a spoon. I’m
coughing like a patient dying from T.B.
Zani: “How does it feel to bow down to someonesbali?”
(Brother in law.)
At his question, the first thing I see are his feet right before
my eyes. I’m almost kissing them, Thokozani pushes me
back down as I attempt to raise my head.
Zani: “Phola mgodoyi, this is where you belong. Righton
the ground, kissing my feet.” (Relax bastard.)
Me: “Sbali ngiyakucela.” (Please brother in-law.)
Zani: “Ucela ini wenja? You like acting like a dog,
right? Then I will treat you like one.” (What are you
pleading for?)
Nelly must have told him what I did to her.
Me: “I didn’t mean to touch her sbali, I apologised,you
can ask her.”
Zani: “Was that the first time you hit her, or when you
almost killed her?”
I grind my teeth as he tightens the hold around myneck,
his fingers dig on the curve of my neck, depriving me
of air.
Zani: “Yini sbali? You can’t breathe?” (What is it?)
He questions at the sound of my gagging, his tone ismocking
me. I’m whimpering and squirming uncomfortably under
his touch, the tie around my neck adds to the suffocation.
Me: “Thokozani, please...”
My voice sounds raspy.
Zani “This is a warning Bhekifa, stay away from my
sister. I know about the stupid meeting you and your
uncles planned. You will tell them that you want nothing
to do with Nelly anymore and cancel that
meeting.”
He pulls away at this saying and watches me as I fight
to breathe. I’m embarrassingly lying on the floor, my
head spinning as my brain slowly acceptsthe air it
wasn’t receiving. My eyes find Thokozaniglaring down
at me, a frown has claimed his features.
Zani: “Did you hear what I said?”
Me: “Nelly is my wife, I can’t let her go like our
marriage means…”
He grabs my neck, lifting me up, with his hand slowly
tightening around it. I take hold of his wrist, an attempt to
lessen the grip. He pushes me back until my back hits the
wall.
Zani: “I don’t think you heard me, sbali. I said you will
cancel that meeting. I don’t want you anywhere nearmy
sister. If I would have it, you would disappear. I don’t know
maybe go herd cows in Swaziland or something, I hear the
weather is nice over there.
Unfortunately, my niece and nephews would be utterly
heart broken. I hope we’re clear sbali, I don’t
want to take drastic measures in ensuring my
sister’s safety.”
I nod, reluctantly. He smirks and pulls away from me,again
I’m brought to my knees.
Zani: “Ihaba sbali? Surely, you’re not this weak areyou?”
(You’re exaggerating.)
I try not to look up at him, shame has me by the
collar.
Zani: “I wish I could stay and chat, it was nice seeingyou
again... sbali.” (Brother in law.)
He leaves me with these words, Thokozani doesn’tknow
anything about my marriage. He’s just a big bully who
thinks the word revolves around him, howdoes he expect
me to turn my back on my family?
Nelly has come back to me before, I know she willdo it
again.

cm®
To be continued©
“NINETEEN”

NELLY PAGE.

“Ayanda get back here.”

Ayanda wants to send me into an early grave, the child
has been causing trouble for days now. She wants her
father. How do I bring Bhekifa around mykids when he is
a danger to me?
Me: “Ayanda wait for me.”
She’s all over the mall and I can’t keep up with her, she
insisted on coming with me, little did I know shewas
planning on giving me a headache. She disappears into
the PEP store, great… Now I have tosearch for her in
those darn aisles. I push the trolleyfaster, worried that
she might be abducted, childrengo missing every day in
this country.

“Nelly!”
Jesus, not him. What is he doing here? I stop, closemy
eyes and wish for him to go away.
“Nelly!”
Whoever said wishes come true lied, why is Bhekifa still
here? I turn exhaling as loud as I can, his tall-selfis
standing before me with a subtle frown on his face. He
hasn’t changed at all, still the Bhekifa I know. Stands with
so much arrogance, a kind of confidence that would have
you feeling inferior. He still smells good too. I mentally
smack myself on thehead for the thought.
Bhekifa: “How are you?”
Let me see, after you beat me up and almost killedme?
How am I? I don’t have time for this man, my baby is in
the shop probably causing havoc. I turnthe trolley to
continue with my depressing day, butBhekifa slides in
front of the trolley.
Me: “What are you doing? You’re violating the
restraining order.”
Bhekifa: “We’re in public, surely you don’t think Iwould
attack you. Do you?”
Me: “I don’t know Bhekifa, you tell me.”
Bhekifa: “I want to apologise for what I did to you.”Me:
“Not now, I have to get my daughter.”
Bhekifa: “Ayanda? Where is she?”
Me: “Around.”
Bhekifa: “What do you mean around? The mall is
crowded Nelly and you let my daughter wander offwith
no adult supervision.”
Is he kidding me?
Me: “Since when do you care about her? Were younot the
one claiming she is not yours?”
Yeah hey! The devil knows no rest, look at this man. He has
fallen into his claws. His pupils dilate at my exclamation, I
don’t understand the shock in his eyes.He would sing out
loud about how Ayanda is not his daughter, she is his when
it suits him.

Bhekifa: “Okay, you want to hurt me. I understand,but

you can’t talk to me like that. I’m still your
husband. Do I not deserve respect?”
Wow!
Me: “Are there any cameras around?”
I ask, browsing the mall with my eyes, this must be ajoke.
Bhekifa: “Come on Nelly.”
Me: “Who are you trying to fool Bhekifa? What respect
are you talking about? Respect is earned.”
Bhekifa: “Nelly, please. Come back home, we can fixthis.
We love each other, I love you mamakhe.”
Me: “Don’t call me that.”
I snap in annoyance, I don’t have to tolerate him
anymore.
Me: “I want nothing to do with you, the only thing that
ties us together is this godforsaken marriage.Once were
divorced…”
His grimaces at the mention of divorce, his nosecreases
as a flash of surprise swipes through hisface.
Bhekifa: “Divorce? We’re not getting a divorce, Iwon’t
allow it.”
The gods must have been crazy to allow fate to pairme with
this man, this is the highlight of my life.

“I knew it, it’s your fault. You made daddy angry.”

My brat is back and she’s yelling for the whole mall to
hear. This child is too much for her age. She runsto her
father as I try to pull her hand, Bhekifa takes her up in
his arms. I know he is about to play victim,that is one roll
he plays best.
Me: “Ayanda!”
Ayanda: “You broke our family mom, I will never
forgive you.”
Someone smack this child for me, I can’t believe she
continues to yell and people are watching, undoubtedly
shocked by the child speaking to an adult like she is her
peer.
Bhekifa: “Our family is not broken baby, daddy willnever
allow it.”
Master manipulator, we shall see.
Me: “Ayanda, let’s go home.”
She clings on to her father’s neck, a belt will do atthis
point. These are results of lack of discipline.
Me: “I said let’s go… Ayanda.”
I’m getting annoyed, I don’t want to show my irritation
lest Bhekifa dubs me an abuser. That’s right, he is that
desperate at the moment and woulddo anything to get me
back with him, taking my kidswould definitely be his first
move and a good one atthat because no way in
Ramaphosa’s country will Ilet my kids live with him and
his toxic family.

Ayanda: “No, I’m going with daddy.”

Hey! I am being tested.
Bhekifa: “I will bring her tomorrow.”
Me: “No.”
What does he take me for?
Bhekifa: “She is my daughter too, I have every right
to be with my child.”
Smart I see.
Me: “This was not planned, I can’t just let you takeher.”
Ayanda: “I’m going with daddy, I want to stay with
him.”
I can’t deal with this right now, Ayanda screams as Igrab
her arm. Can I smack her back to my father’s house
please?
Bhekifa: “Will you stop? You’re scaring the child, I will
bring her before bedtime tonight.”
I am not okay with this.
Bhekifa: “Say goodbye to your mother, baby.”
I must be crazy to let my baby walk away with that
monster, Lord tell me I’m not making a mistake.

-NKATEKO MATHEBULA.
I’m meeting up with Stephen at Maponya mall, it’s been
days and I haven’t updated Jabu. We might have a lead,
but I don’t want to get his hopes up. Themall is not so
crowded, thank God for the middle of the month. I find
Stephen waiting for me at the foodcourt.

Stephen: “I almost went back home.”

He greets with these words, I join him at the table.Me:
“My apologies. What do you have me for me?” He
laughs at my question.
Stephen: “Straight to work I see?”
Me: “A little girl is missing, we don’t have muchtime.”
He nods and slides an A4 brown envelope across the
table, I open it to find pictures of girls and boysbeing
held captive in an abandoned building.
Stephen: “These footages were taken yesterday, thechildren
are all under the ages of twelve.”
Me: “How many are they?”
Stephen: “It’s a hefty number, I think Sia is amongst
them.”
Me: “I can’t imagine what she’s going through, hermother
said she was diagnosed with pneumonia before they claimed
she had the virus. She’s beingneglected Stephen, I wouldn’t
put it past those animals.”
Stephen: “I know, they don’t care if they lose one.There’s
plenty more where they came from.”
My wife was treated like trash too.
Me: “Do we have any leads?”
He looks around the mall before moving closer towhisper to
me.
Stephen: “There’s a load leaving for China tonight,they
are located in Orange Farm. What a place to hide?
They know the police hardly show their facesthere.”
Me: “Smart bastards, so what’s the plan?”
Stephen: “I have recruited twelve men who are
willing to die for the course. Majority are like me andyou,
they have lost their loved ones to human traffickers.”
Me: “Twelve men? That’s not enough, it will be like
walking into a lion’s den and expect to walk out alive.”
Stephen: “It’s worth a try, or else you’re going to losethat
little girl.”
I can’t afford that.
Me: “What time are we meeting?”
Stephen: “We? You’re sitting this one out Nkateko,it’s
too personal for you and bringing emotions to amission
is always risky.”
Stephen knows how important this is for me, I’m notgoing to
miss a chance to save that child.
Me: “You’re not taking me out of this mission, you
know better than to do that. I have been after those
people Stephen, don’t take this opportunity from me.”
Stephen: “Fine, but leave your heart at home.”
I don’t know what heart he’s talking about, I lost itthe
day I saw my wife’s dead body.

-SABELO ZULU.

“Your favourite son is here.”

I tell my mother as I walk into the living room withBhekifa
and his daughter strapped in his arms, another mouth to
feed. Argh!
Mariam: “What happened?”
I expect Mariam to be shocked, my brother hardlyever
brings his kids over.
Bhekifa: “What do you mean?”
He questions her as he settles down with Ayanda onhis
lap, she’s holding on to him as if we bite. That’s how bad
it is, the relationship we have with Nelly’s children is not
strong. It’s null and void if I can put it lightly.
Mariam: “Why did you bring her?”
It’s not hard to catch the annoyance in her voice.
Bhekifa: “She’s my baby mama, I don’t understandyour
question.”
Sabelo: “Since when bafo? I thought we agreedthat…”
Bhekifa: “We didn’t agree on anything, you two
convinced me otherwise, I never had any doubts about
her until the two of you planted the thought inmy head.”
Mariam: “You’re not a child Bhekifa, you could’ve putyour
foot down, but you went with it. You agreed with us that
this is…”
Bhekifa covers Ayanda’s ears as he grimaces at his
mother… disrespectful…
Bhekifa: “Not in front of her, she doesn’t know any ofthis.”
He whispers, his voice chides an unhappy Mariam.
Bhekifa: “Ayanda, go find your cousins in their room.I
will be with you just now.”
Ayanda hops from his lap and rushes out of the
living room.

Mariam: “Where did you find that child?”

She doesn’t waste time.
Bhekifa: “I don’t like your talks mama, Ayanda is my
daughter.”
Mariam: “Why are you like this Bhekifa? Must you bea
fool like your brother?”
I am offended, extremely.
Me: “There’s a time for everything mama and this isnot
it.”
She ignores my complaint. When is this mother
dying? Hai, she has lived man.
Bhekifa: “Tell me, what is wrong with me taking
responsibility for my baby?”
Mariam: “Nothing at all son, but Ayanda can’t be
yours.”
Bhekifa: “How do you know? I’m getting tired of your
assumptions, first you told me that Ayanda couldn’t
be my child and like the fool you just called me, I letthe
words sink in. Then you showed me pictures of my wife
with another man and had me thinking Nellywas cheating
on me.”
Sabelo: “She was bafo.”
What’s wrong with him? He should believe his familyover
anyone.

Bhekifa: “There was no video to prove your claim, just

pictures of her having lunch with whoever thatidiot was.
All you did was make me more insecure, Itrusted Nelly
and was confident that she would never betray me. But
you had other plans for me, didn’t you mama?”
The muti must be weighing off, we need to add more.
Mariam glances at me, we must be thinking the same
thing.
Me: “I don’t like what you’re implying bafo, magrizawants
the best for you. You can’t blame her for yourfailed
marriage.”
Bhekifa: “Sabelo please, I know what I’m talking
about. I’m not an idiot, I know what I have done tomy
wife is wrong and I intend on fixing things withher.”
Me: “Nelly gave you a special portion didn’t she? Thisis
not you talking.”
We might be caught if we don’t play our cards right,his
phone rings as he prepares an answer for me.
Mariam: “Who is that?”
Ehh! Just like that?
Me: “Mama relax hau, let the man take his calls inpeace.”
Bhekifa: “Thank you bafo.”
Ohhoo!
Mariam: “Is it Nelly? Are you serious about fixing
things with that woman, Bhekifa? Is that why you
brought Ayanda here?”
Bhekifa: “Mama please not now, excuse me.”He
grumbles.
Bhekifa: “Cheryl, hey.”
He says as he plods out of the room, Mariam loves
clicking her tongue when she is annoyed. I’m shocked
she can still master it at her age.
Mariam: “Your brother will kill me one day, I’m tellingyou
Sabelo.”
Me: “Cheryl? Who is that?”
Mariam: “I don’t think I want to know.”
She gets up from the couch, yep old age is havingfun
here. She’s taking forever to stand up straight, with
grunts here and there.
Mariam: “Tell Rose to stop looking at herself in the
mirror and prepare supper. I’m going to see my friend,
Bhekifa is slipping out of my hands and I can’tallow that.”
Hitler.

To be continued©
“TWENTY”

NELLY PAGE.

Thokozani is the one to open the gate for me, he smiles

and waves as I drive in and closes the gate. Iwas told by
this big brother of mine to stay away from Bhekifa, now I
have to explain why I let the husband take my child.
Thokozani greets me with a smile as I hop out of the car, I
try to avoid his eyes, bearing in mind that he is spiritually
gifted and I can’tlie to him.
Zani: “Took longer than expected.”
Me: “The mall was crowded.”
My first lie, gosh I hope he doesn’t sense this one. I
should have thought of a lie while driving home,
Thokozani makes me nervous that my mind is wipedclean.
I grace him with a grateful smile when he helps me with
the grocery bags, he stops half way tothe house and looks
back at the vehicle. My
ancestors need to come through for me, give me anexcuse.

Zani: “We’re you not with Mboni?”

Thanks for nothing.
Me: “I… I was.”
I’m a stammering mess.
Zani: “Where is she?”
Here goes nothing.
Me: “Her- her father took her.”
I answer without looking at him, I can feel his eyes
boring me and I expect him to scold me. My eyes hump
when he carries on to the house, leaving mebehind.
Silently, Thokozani places the grocery bagson the
kitchen counter.

Me: “Thank you.”

It’s a genuine one.
Zani: “I told Bhekifa to cancel the meeting with hisuncles.”
He breaks the news as he leans back on the counter,his
eyes are on me, searching… I don’t know what he’s
looking to find.
Me: “Oh! You met him already?”
Zani: “Yes, you’re done with him.”
Me: “I know.”
I do and I never thought I would ever separate fromhim.
Zani: “So you know that he will never allow you to be
happy?”
Scary, but…
Me: “Yes I know.”
Zani: “You also know that your kids are not safe athis
mother’s house?”
What is with the interrogation?
Me: “Bhekifa has never taken them there, hewouldn’t do
that.”
Zani: “He’s there as we speak.”I
won’t even ask how he knows.
Zani: “That woman is evil Nelly, your kids are not
safe with her.”
Me: “Well we all know she’s not a saint, she hatedme
from day one.”
I let out these words with a huff, Thokozani frownsdown at
me. He can be too serious sometimes.
Zani: “That is not what I’m talking about, Bhekifa’s
mother is the reason behind his animosity towardsyou.”
Go figure…
Me: “I know Zaza, it’s not record science that sheand
Sabelo poisoned Bhekifa against me.”
Feeling tired and drained, I take a sit.
Zani: “Dadewethu!” (My sister.)
A quick chuckle leaves his mouth, his eyes areglaring,
making me feel stupid.
Zani: “I don’t blame you, you’re blind. Bhekifa has
been bewitched, his mother controls every move he
makes.”
Me: “A witch?”
He doesn’t respond to my question, but starts
burping.
Zani: “I’m going to get her, she shouldn’t eat in that
house.”
Me: “I’m coming with you.”
Zani: “Cha dadewethu, you stay.” (No my sister.)He
rushes out, giving me no chance to dispute.

-NKATEKO MATHEBULA.

We have men in disguise inside the building, the planis

that we attack from the inside. If we tackle the guards first
then it will be easier to get the children.
Stephen came up with an idea of using a Piki-Tup truck, it
won’t give off anything. There are about six
men in here including me and Stephen.
Stephen: “Remember, we go in, get the children andleave.”
Me: “What about the suspects?”
Stephen: “We’re saving the children today, we don’thave
enough men to go against an army.”
Me: “Can’t we at least catch one, one that will leadus to
the others?”
Stephen: “This is what I was talking about Nkateko,
you’re deep into this.”
His tone is cold and disapproving.
Me: “There is nothing wrong with that, I need to avenge my
wife. You can’t expect me to roll over andpretend like
nothing happened.”
I’m not going to let this go, those people deserve tobe
locked up and I will make sure it happens.
Stephen: “I hear you, but not today. Don’t act stupidwhen
we go in there, or those children’s lives will bein danger.”
There is a thread of warning in his voice… Great… This
was my chance to capture those bastards whotook my
wife.
Stephen: “Promise you will behave Nkateko.”
I can’t make that promise, the other guys are glaring at
me, their mouths pinched shut as if withholding what they
want to say and in the process making mesee my poor
decision making skills.
Me: “Fine, let’s do this.”
Annoyance clings on to me as I snap out the answer.
Stephen: “Good, there are three entrances. We are going to
scatter, if you see any threat take it down.”
We wait as Stephen checks with the men inside, we’re
given a go ahead a while later. Checking the time on my
phone it’s past 07:00pm. I surf the coastoutside, it’s as
empty as a cemetery. I give the guysa heads up and jump
out of the truck, each one knows where to head and what
to do. There’s a guard at the entrance, his back turned to
me. A shottakes him down, if it weren’t for the silencer a
war would break out in this place.
“I’m in.”
I hear Stephen say through the earpiece, just as I tiptoe
inside the building. The lights are dim, I can hear voices
coming from a room on my left. Men arebehind the closed
door, I can tell from the mannish voices.
“How many girls do we have?”
The accent is foreign, I can’t say from which country,but he
struggles with pronouncing English words.
“Thirty.”
The second man speaks with a baritone, he soundslocal.
“That’s not what we agreed on, you said fifty girls.”The
foreign guy grunts.
“And you’re not paying enough, show me the moneyand I
will give you what you want.”
“I paid a hefty amount to be getting thirty girls.”My
heart wrenches as I listen to those animals
negotiate innocent lives as if they are livestock.
“Nkateko, where are you? I’m in the room where the
children are kept.”
Stephen’s voice through the earpiece snatches meaway
from the depressing conversation.
Me: “I’m coming.”
Dammit! I think I said that too loud. I decide to runfor it
when the room falls into stillness. The door swings
open as I turn.
“Hey!”
It’s the local voice, with no doubt calling out to me. Ikeep
the gun on the buckle of my belt and slowly turn to find
two elderly black men dressed in suits and a Chinese
man. There is one more, he’s Asian, probably Filipino.
“What are you doing here?”
His eyes are shifty and full of suspicion, I have toplay it
cool or I’m a dead man.
Me: “I was doing my rounds.”
I keep my voice as low as possible. “You’re
not supposed to be here, scoot.”
One of the black men barks at me, I give them a slight
bow before turning to walk away. That wasclose…
“Don’t your men wear safety boots?”
It’s the Chinese guy, his question stops me on my tracks
although it’s not directed to me. My eyes track my shoes
and dammit… I’m wearing sneakers…
“They… do…”
The black man’s voice drags the answer out
questionably.

-SABELO ZULU.

For a second I think we’re under attack when my mother

runs into the house from outside, her eyes are wide with
fear and she’s panting like she just rana marathon.
Mariam: “He’s here.”
She whispers as if mentioning the person is an abomination,
I think of pouring her a glass of water. But then again let
her finish her breath, I like what myeyes are seeing. Where
is Rose when you need her?
This scene will make one good pillow talk.Me:
“Who?”
I ask as I take my sweet time to grab a glass fromthe
cupboard.
Mariam: “Nelly’s brother, he just parked outside.”
Yeah neh! Dear God, I’m okay. I don’t want to age
please, mark me absent for that. Is ageing is this
painful?
Me: “I thought abafana baka Cynthia’s were chasingyou,
you have been at war with that witch since you moved in
here.” (Cynthia’s zombies.)
Mariam: “Are you saying I’m a witch, Sabelo?”Is
she not?
Me: “I’m not saying you are and I’m not saying you’renot.
Phela wena magriza( (old lady), you’re full of
secrets. Who knows, you probably jump over us while
we’re sleeping. We’re thinking umuntu ulele (you’re
asleep), but nope… she’s dancing to John vuligate, naked
in our bedroom. Come to think of it, Rose lost her job
when she moved in with me.”
The look on her face says she’s going to explode,offence is
taken not given.
Mariam: “How did I manage to give birth to you? Youare
just like your father, he was useless and dumb.”
Her words force me to put the glass on top of thesink,
she will get her own water.
Me: “Are you taking it to that magriza (old lady)?
You’re using that man to insult me?”
Mariam: “Shut up Sabelo, my head is spinning man.”
This is how old people get heart attacks and boy dothey
love it because they get all the attention they have been
seeking from everyone. A sudden knockon the door
makes her squeal, her eyes bulge.
Me: “He doesn’t bite mama, relax.”
What’s wrong with this woman?
Mariam: “I’m going to hide in my room, if he asksabout
me tell him I went to see a friend.”
Me: “I can’t lie to a sangoma mama, he will turn meinto
a frog.”
She narrows her eyes at me, grabs the glass on thesink
and attempts to throw it at me.
Mariam: “Do what I say you stupid boy.”
My mother snorts and drags her feet to her room, Iam not
risking my life by lying to a sangoma. I openthe door to an
impatient Thokozani, Bhekifa shouldbe here to face his
brother in law.

Me: “Eish saan, bafoza. Hoe gaan dit?” (How are you
brother?)
He frowns down at me, his presence makes me
uncomfortable. Thokozani peeps inside the house before
burping about three times. Sangoma or not…Sies…
Me: “Bafo, I’m sure you didn’t come here to burp onmy
face.”
He pushes his way in, his eyes are searching my
house.
Thokozani: “Where is your mother?”
He’s looking into my eyes and I am not going to lie tohim,
not when he’s looking at me like I stole his bones.
Me “Mama, our in law is here. Come out.”
I shout for my mother, I’m sure she heard me.

To be continued©
“TWENTY ONE.”

NKATEKO MATHEBULA

The men have held me captive, I guess I didn’t play my

cards right. Stephen will be disappointed in me, Ihope he
finds Sia. For now I have to play things cooland try to
think of a way out of here and I need to besmart about
this. I’m tied to a chair in the same room they were
having a meeting.
“How did you slip up Baloi? This was a private
meeting.”
The Chinese man has not stopped complaining, he’stalking
to a big chubby black man who arrived minutes ago. He
seems to be the one in charge.
“Please Bao, I told you to call me Ntsako.”
He sounds stupid for a man who is in charge, he
doesn’t give that Alpha aura when he speaks.
Bao: “Forget that, we have to get rid of this man. Wecan’t
risk anyone finding out our plan.”
Ntsako: “Don’t worry, you stress too much, my boyswill take
care of this idiot. He won’t live to see the sunrise.”
I am not going to die so easily, the other men laughas if
having someone killed is something to be elated about.
Bao: “That’s what I want to hear, now, when can wetake
the group to the lab?”
Ntsako: “Lab? I thought you’re shipping them to
China?”
Bao: “I don’t want a bunch of dead monkeys on my
territory, it’s better the vaccines are tested here intheir
land.”
Vaccines? What is he on about?
Ntsako: “You don’t have to be racist about it Bao?
Business has been good between us, let’s not ruinit.”
Bao: “It’s not like you care about them, was it not youwho
came up with the plan of faking this whole virusthing and
using the children to test the vaccines?”
The Ntsako guy tilts his head to look at me, the onlyreason
they are free to talk about their plan in frontof me is
because they are going to kill me.

-NELLY PAGE.

I’m worried about Thokozani, my brother is hard

headed, he doesn’t mind starting a fight and he
always makes sure to finish it. I’m almost done
preparing supper when my parents walk in the
kitchen, laughing.
Me: “What are we happy about?”
It’s awkward for me seeing my father’s arm aroundhis
wife, these two are never affectionate in front ofus.
Dad: “Haibo!”
Me: “I want to laugh too, please share the joke.” Dad:
“Am I not allowed to share jokes with my wife?
Your mother and I were just talking about old times.”
I shouldn’t have asked, I want to hide under the tablewhen
he puts his arms around her and kisses her onthe cheek.
Me: “Please don’t traumatise me.”

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My mother laughs.
Mom: “What are you talking about? How do you thinkyou
were made?”
Jesus no!!!
Me: “Ma ewww.”
Mom: “Your father and I did not hold hands and you
were creating, we…”
I cover my ears, I’m not ready for this. I will never be,I
blink a few times to wipe away the image of my parents
getting it on that’s bullying its way into my head.
Me: “This should be illegal, you can’t traumatise yourchild
like this. I want to press charges.”
My father responds with a chuckle.
Dad: “Where is your brother?”
He still has his arms around his wife, someone tellthem to
stop please.
Me: “He went to get Ayanda.”
I hope they don’t give me a lecture.
Dad: “Where is she?”
Me: “Bhekifa took her, we bumped into him at themall
and Ayanda insisted on going with him.”
I don’t like the look on my father’s face, it assuresme
that I made a bad decision.
Dad: “Make me a cup of tea baby.”
But his wife is here, why me? I hate making tea, I have
been making that old man tea since I was in primary
school. Till today God hasn’t answered myprayers that it
burns his tongue so he never drinks itin his life again.
Mom: “You still make that face?”
She asks as he walks away.

Me: “How can I not? I thought by now he would be a

juice drinker or something.”
She laughs.
Me: “Seriously ma, where were you when other wiveswere
introducing their husbands to Coke and Tropika?”
She laughs louder, I’m serious here.
Mom: “I’ll prepare the tea, you’ll take it to him so hethinks
you made it.”
Some mothers, she should tell him I quit.
Mom: “Doesn’t your husband drink tea?”
Warning! Sensitive topic alert, change course of direction.
She stops fiddling with the spoons in thedrawer.
Mom: “Do you miss him?”
Me: “He is the only man I have ever known, of courseI
miss him. I will always love Bhekifa, more than I would
like, but I don’t want to be around him anymore.”
Mom: “Oh Nelly.”
Me: “It hurts ma, it really does. Being strong is not aseasy
as people say, he’s still the first person I think of when I
go to bed at night and the moment I open my eyes in the
morning. I know people will expect me to move on as if I
didn’t share my life with the man, it’s easy to judge and
point fingers until you’rein that very situation.
Of course he is abusive, he cheated on me and treated me
like trash, but that didn’t erase the love I have for him in
my heart. I will always love him, people expect me to cut
my hair, dye it red and starthash tagging men are trash.
Some of them are married to or dating the likes of Bhekifa
and they wouldn’t dream of living them, but Nelly has to
be strong because she is a public figure and I have
rubbernecks sticking their nose into my personal life.”
I’m too emotional, I did say this is a sensitive topic. My
mother pulls me into her arms, there is nothinglike a
mother’s hug. Her chest is the most comfortable place to
be and her scent is heavenly. I
would have lost my mind if this woman was not inmy
life.

-SABELO ZULU.

Thokozani should know his way to the living room,yet

he’s standing in my mother’s kitchen like he belongs
here.
Me: “Bafo, you can go in.”
Visitors are a problem, they have no timing at all. It’s
almost supper time, I hope he will leave before hunger
kills me. I let Thokozani lead the way to the living room.
Me: “You’re allowed to sit on a chair bafo?”He
frowns at me.
Me: “It’s just that sangomas are always sitting on a reed
mat, so I figured ogogo (elders) don’t like sittingon the
couch. Phela old people find it hard to adjust
to white people’s things.”
Thokozani: “What are you talking about?”
Maybe he wants me to speak Zulu.
Me: “I mean you should be careful when you sit onthis
comfortable chair, we don’t want to exhaust ogogo
(elders.)”
Thokozani: “Call your mother.”
He grunts, this is one angry man. Come to think of it,I
don’t remember seeing him smile. Even at the Zulu
wedding, he was grumpy the whole time. I thought the
man was going to pull out a gun and kill all the Zulus for
taking his sister from them.
Thokozani: “Yey, what are you looking at? Get your
mother.”
He snaps above a whisper. Why was I staring?Me:
“Thokoza gogo.” (Ancestral praises.)
He frowns, his eyes stabbing. Me:
“I mean yes bafo Thok’zizo.”
Aii let me get the old lady before I am swallowed
alive. I meet my mother in the corridor, she has
changed into black clothing and wore a black head
wrap.

-NELLY PAGE.

Worried about Thokozani, I decide to ring him up.Zani:

“Dadewethu.” (My sister.)
Relief washes over me, hearing his voice over thephone.
Me: “You’ve been gone for too long, is everythingokay?”
Zani: “Are you checking if that fool is still alive?”Me:
“Don’t joke like that.”
Zani: “Who said I’m joking?”
He doesn’t sound like he’s joking.
Me: “What’s going on there Zaza?”
Zani: “I’m waiting for my niece, don’t worry about us.
We’re okay.”
Me: “Come home then.”
Zani: “Yes mom.”
I want to laugh, but only manage a smile.Me:
“I won’t dish up until you get here.” Zani:
“Perfect, I won’t be long then.”
He greets me goodbye and cuts the call, I trust thathe
won’t do anything stupid in front of Ayanda.

-SABELO ZULU.

Me: “Wat is dit griza?” (What is it?)

She’s sweating, my mother is definitely acting
strange.
Mariam: “Keep your voice down slima.” (Idiot.)
She whispers a grunt, I didn’t realise I was that loud.Me:
“Why are you dressed like that?”
Mariam: “Black clothes will hide my secrets fromhim.”
Me: “I don’t understand.”
Mariam: “He won’t be able to see through me, what Ido
behind closed doors.”
Heee! Wonders shall never end.
Me: “So vele vele you are a witch mama?” (Honestly.)
Mariam: “I’m not, but he will see what I have beendoing to
Bhekifa. I can’t have that.”
Me: “Is that why you’re sweating like Caster
Semenya?”
My mother stresses for nothing.
Mariam: “Voetsek, I told you to say I’m not around.”(Piss
off.)
Me: “Mama please, Thokozani is not Mboro, he won’tburn
you with the Holy Ghost fire.”
She narrows her eyes and clicks her tongue, I can’thave
such a woman as a mother. See my luck, I’mstuck with
Mariam Zulu. Suddenly she grabs my
hand, her eyes widen. She takes the scarf drapedover
her shoulders and covers her head.
Me: “What’s wrong now? Mama you’re seriously
acting weird.”
Her head points behind me, I turn to see Thokozani
standing with his hands folded across his chest. I did
say visitors are a problem, what is he doing in other
people’s corridors? What if we keep zombieshere?
Me: “Bafo, here she is.”
I push my mother forward, she stumbles a few stepstoward
Thokozani. Her body is visibly trembling.
Mariam: “My in-law.”
She greets shakily, Musa Mseleku should cancel Uthando
Nesthembu (reality show). We need space for “Life With
The Zulus.” This is the real definition ofa reality show. I
stand back to watch how this will allpin out. A sangoma
versus a witch. I should record this, honestly.

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Thokozani: “Unjani?” (How are you?)
That ‘unjani’ is fire, Mariam should be screaming
right about now. She nods, why is she not screaming?I have
seen this on TV, unless we were lied to.
Thokozani studies her under his gaze, my mother isin an
uncomfortable situation. I wave at her when she turns
back to look at me, she clicks her tongue. Sangomas are
this powerful? The old lady is shakingin her boots.
Thokozani: “I’m here for my niece.”
Argh! He’s here for that brat. It’s okay, Mariam’s timewill
come. One day is one day.
Mariam: “Bhe- Bhekifa is n- not here.”
Me: “Magriza yini watatazela?” (Why are you so
nervous?)
I move past her.
Me: “Don’t worry bafo, Bhekifa will understand. Ai
you’re a life saver Zisto, minus one plate, dankie poi(thank
you). The meat is not enough because magriza (old lady)
eats while cooking.”
Mom: “Yey wena.” (Stop i.)
Me: “Hawu mama, I said what you were thinking. Theonly
difference is that I’m bold enough to speak, Zisto
understands. O ru kanjani makhosi?” (How about it?)
Zani: “Call me Zisto again.”
He growls, I hide behind my mother. It’s bad enoughthat
I didn’t get my brother’s height.
Me: “Let me get the brat… I mean Yaya baby.”
Mariam: “Sabelo.”
My mother calls for me, I chuckle at how terrifiedshe
sounds.
Me: “Bafo be nice to my mother, she’s preaching atchurch
tomorrow. Please don’t stare at her for toolong.”
Thokozani gives me a confused look, it quickly
changes to annoyance.
Thokozani: “Don’t worry, I’m not here to expose you. I
don’t care what you do to your sons, the only thing that
matters to me is my family. If Bhekifa wants to
seek help then he will, I can’t do anything unless my
ancestors tell me otherwise. If you want to carry onkilling
your sons slowly, then don’t let me stop you. Just know your
end will not be a nice one.”
I’m stuck on sons? The plural has me sweating in allthe
wrong places, my mother is…
Me: “Bafo, you keep saying sons. Don’t you meanson?”
My mother nudges me with an elbow.
Me: “No, magriza. I want to know if you’re bewitchingme as
well. Am I living with a snake?”
Mariam: “Sabelo I will smack you out of this house.”
Now she can talk freely because she was given
permission to continue bewitching her sons. I amnot
okay… my mother? No way, it can’t be.
The little brat comes running into the living room, I don’t
know who called her. She doesn’t say anythingwhen her
uncle tells her they are going home. Goodriddance to
bad rubbish.
Maraim: “Sabelo!”
Why is she calling me?
Me: “I don’t talk to witches please.”
I leave her in the living to go find my wife, I’m hungry.

cm®
To be continued©
“TWENTY TWO”

CHERYL ZIKHALI.

I didn’t expect Bhekifa to be this kind, don’t give me that

look. I was given permission to address him by his first
name, deep down I am a bit shocked. I mean,what are the
odds of a cleaner befriending a senior in a major
company? Mind you that’s not the status I had my whole
life. Life was comfortable for me onceupon a time, things
seem to be looking up again. I find it easy to communicate
with him more than anyone, strange I know. Fate has a
funny way of throwing us into the lion’s den and makes
sure you’re as comfortable and safe as a baby in a womb.
The black wedding band on Bhekifa’s hand is not for
show, even a blind person can point out that the manis
married. I’m not sure what I’m hoping will come out of
this, I know though what I want from him. I can’t speak
for him, what he expects to gain from befriending a
woman since he is tied down.
“Cheryl?”
Bhekifa’s voice snatches me out of my deep thoughts, I
trail the sound of his voice to find him seated beside me in
the car. His delicious scent hovers about, making me purr
like a kitten, he smellsas he looks… expensive… I send
him a brief smile, returning the subtle grin splitting his
lips.
Bhekifa: “I know you’re worried about your daughter,I
can’t say I can relate, but I can be here for you.”
I called Bhekifa when everything became too muchto
handle, my mother found out about Sia’s abduction and
that it could be human trafficking.
She lashed out on me, talking about how I’m a bad
mother, apparently I neglected my child. I think it was the
anger talking, she can get nasty when angry.I didn’t think
Bhekifa would pitch, but here he is… We’re parked at a
secluded place, in the outskirts of Johannesburg. He was
driving to god-knows wheretill I asked him to pull over.
Me: “Thank you.”
Bhekifa: “Do you trust this Jabu person?”
Me: “He’s a family friend, he was my late husband’sbest
friend.”
Bhekifa: “Oh, well I hope he is not part of thissyndicate.”
Jabu would never, besides he’s too busy obsessingover
ghosts and Zain to be kidnapping innocent children.
Me: “He wouldn’t, I trust him. His cousin is on it, it’sbeen
days though and I’m losing my mind.”
Bhekifa: “You’re an over thinker and that will not helpyour
situation.”
How does he know? I overthink things to a point thatthey
keep on replaying in my mind.
Bhekifa: “How about we do something tomorrow?Bawling
or a movie?”
Me: “How about sky diving?”
Bhekifa: “Don’t tell me you’re an adrenalin junkie?”
Me: “There is nothing more exhilarating like extreme
sports. I had a fear of heights, but Zain made sure todrag
me out of my shell, literally.”
A ghostly smile paints his lips, he appears to be
uncomfortable.
Bhekifa: “You loved him, didn’t you?”
Random!
Me: “I did, he was the first man to actually see my worth.
I wasn’t looking for a relationship when Zainswept me off
my feet.”
Bhekifa: “So you like being swept off your feet?”
He’s looking into my eyes, it’s a deep stare. I can’tmake
out what he’s thinking, I shrug as confusionstrokes over
me.
Bhekifa: “You have beautiful lips.”
I feel a shiver crawl on me and restrain my bodyfrom
shaking, lest I look like a freak.
Me: “Thanks.”
Shyly, I send my gratitude… yep… Shyness is not a
stranger to me. There’s a moment of silence thathas
me fidgeting on the seat, Bhekifa clears his throat
before letting these words roll out of his tongue.
Bhekifa: “Let me drive you back home, my daughtermust be
looking for me.”
I nod to his suggestion, deep down I don’t want to go.I’m
enjoying being around him, Lord knows I caught feelings
for this man donkey years ago.

-NKATEKO MATHEBULA.

These men are not who I’m looking for, my wife waskilled
by human traffickers. How did we make such amistake?
Gosh, I was so close to nailing this.
“We’re moving out Nkateko, where are you?”
I almost forgot about Stephen, how do I let him knowthat
I’m held captive.
Me: “Please let me go, I have nothing to do with anyof
this.”
I get everyone’s attention with this lie, they all burstout in
sarcastic laughter.
Me: “I won’t tell anyone about this, the children, the
vaccines. I won’t say anything I swear.”
Stephen should pick up something.
Ntsako: “We are going to let you go alright, with abullet
through your skull.”
Stephen: “Oh shit!”
Great, he finally caught up.
Stephen: “How many are there?”
Really?
Me: “If you let me go I will forget I ever saw the fourof
you, please.”
Stephen: “Four? It won’t be hard to take them down.
Which wing are you at?”
I have to be creative about this or else these peoplewill
notice that I’m talking to someone.
Ntsako: “Shut up, there’s no use in pleading for yourlife.
You are done for.”
Me: “Okay, I hear you. Can I please use the men’sroom
before I die? I doubt they have toilets in heaven.”
They chuckle as they stare like I have lost my mind.
Me: “I can just step outside the west wing, I knowthere
are no toilets here.”
No more questions Stephen, I sound like a fool eachtime I
open my mouth
Stephen: “Hold on man, we’re coming for you.”
I can tell that he’s running, hopefully I’ll stall thesefools
until backup gets here.

-NELLY PAGE.

Who knew finding a trusted Personal Assistant could be

so hard? It is nothing though compared tobeing a single
mother, regretfully I had to disappointmy readers by
pausing the story on social media until I sort out my life.
Juggling between two demanding jobs and a mother is not
child’s play, my
mother suggested that I take leave from work to focus on
the kids, I will go crazy if I do that. Listeningto people’s
problems keeps me distracted from my own.

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The world is not informed about my failing marriage,

thankfully. Being out of the public eye helps a lot.
Right now the world is concentrated on “Mess” which
is good for me. Let the Zulu brothers keepthem busy
while I try and fix my life.

A hefty sigh discharges from my chest as I park outside

Dros restaurant, I’m meeting up with Phakathi Funani.
Heaven knows why I agreed to meet up with him,
nerves have me by the throat. Don’t get it twisted, he is
only a friend and I’m stillmarried. I have no plans of
jumping into a relationship anytime soon, like I told my
mother.
However, I need a friend. Phakathi was always a
good listener and that is what I need.
I’m met by a waitress at the door, she gives me a
smile and I immediately tell her that I’m meeting up with a
friend. I follow her in, Phakathi said he’s here already. I’m
actually thirty minutes late, being a timekeeper is not in my
genes.
The restaurant is crowded, I think Phakathi spots mefirst
because there he is in the middle of the room, he’s on his
feet waving at me with a big smile on hisface.
He pulls me into an unexpected hug as I get to him,it is so
sudden that I don’t return it. The hug is brief,yet awkward.
Phakathi: “I’m sorry, I got too excited.”
Me: “Don’t worry about it.”
He pulls a seat for me, I see he is still the gentlemanhe
was back then.
Me: “Have you been waiting for too long?”Of
course he has, dummy.
Phakathi: “Almost my whole life and I will continue
waiting.”
Why is he taking the off ramp? I let my eyes wander
around the noisy jam-packed restaurant, anotherwaitress
approaches us… perfect timing.
Waitress: “Would you like anything to drink while
you’re still deciding on what to eat?”
My eyes dart to Phakathi’s glass, he’s drinking beer.Me: “I
will have what he’s having.”
She nods and walks off.
Phakathi: “What happened to the wine-drinkingNelly?”
My mind takes me down memory lane, how Bhekifa hated it
when I drank. Not that I abused the beverage,he would call
his family to tell them how much of a drunkard I was.
Me: “Who said I don’t drink wine anymore?”

He smiles genuinely, how does he manage to keep his teeth

sparkling clean? I should ask him for his routine, Phakathi
has surely changed. Grown actually,he’s bald, no beard.
His skin is exceptionally smoothand wooden brown, it’s
tempting to the touch. When
he smiles, his left cheek digs a hole and forms a dimple,
“the one dimpled man” I would tease him. Ifeel myself
smile while watching him blabber abouthis day, different
expressions kissing his face occasionally.
Phakathi: “Do I have something on my face?”
I blink at his question, realising that I have beenstaring
for far too long.
Me: “N- no. I’m listening, continue.”
He smiles and I spot a tint of shyness as he rubs theback of
his neck.
Phakathi: “Enough about me.”
The waitress brings my drink and we take this timeto
place for our orders, she drops a smile before walking
away.
Phakathi: “How have you been, really?”
I’m not going to mention my husband, I need a breakfrom
the Bhekifa topic.
Me: “Great, I can’t complain.”
Phakathi: “How can you, national best-sellingauthor?”
Quietly, he claps for my success, having me nod myhead in
gratitude.
Phakathi: “I read the Beloved Mashenge, you
knocked it right out of the park.”
I’ve heard these words before.
Me: “That’s my first born, I didn’t think it would putme on
the map.”
Phakathi: “Is it too forward to ask you to sign my
copy?”
Me: “Not at all, you know where my office is, right?”
Phakathi: “Actually I have the book in the car, youcan
sign it once we’re done with dinner.”
Me: “I don’t see why not and for being a fan, maybe Iwill
gift you with a free copy of Sabatha.”
It must be the hunger talking, I don’t give away
books for free.
-BHEKIFA ZULU.

Cheryl: “That’s how Sia was rescued, she’s at homenow

recovering.”
Cheryl’s voice has become background noise, my mind is
lost around Nelly and that fool Phakathi. Myfocus went out
the window the second they walkedinto the restaurant, I
haven’t been able to look anywhere else. I have a good
mind to go and put a stop to whatever they are doing there.
Cheryl: “Earth to Bhekifa!”
Her voice plainly pulls my eyes from Nelly, she raisesher
brows in question.
Cheryl: “I’ve been talking to myself for more than ten
minutes now, are you okay?”
Me: “I’m sorry, what were you saying?”
Cheryl: “I was narrating a story about how Sia was
rescued.”
My concentration fades again and I find myself staring at
my wife across the room, she hasn’t seen
me yet.
Cheryl: “Isn’t that Nelly Page?”
The sound of her name rolling out of Cheryl’s mouthjolts
my heart to my throat.
Me: “You know her?”
Cheryl: “I’m pretty sure all of South Africa knows her,she’s
the one who wrote The Beloved Mashenge andSabatha the
Begetter.”
Oh! Sometimes I forget that she is an author. Cheryl:
“Are you thinking of introducing yourself?”Me: “There
is no need for that, she is my wife.”
I tell her, my eyes refusing to move from Nelly.
Cheryl: “Get out of here, you’re married to Nelly
Page?”
I hope she is not star struck over Nelly, here’s the thing.
Cheryl and I have been spending quite some time
together. It all started a month ago, I enjoy hercompany
and we have shared a kiss once. I have noregrets about it,
the woman keeps me on my toes. I
told her that my wife and I are having problems andthat
we’re separated.
Me: “Yes.”
She keeps this inquisitive look on her face that ispushing me
to continue.
Cheryl: “How is she like? She must be amazing.”
Me: “I’m sorry Cheryl, but I need to have a word withmy
wife.”
I get up, depriving her a chance to respond to my
statement. My eyes are fixed on Nelly as I approach them,
she’s laughing with that fool. It fades instantlyas she spots
my walk.
Me: “What’s going on here?”
Nelly rolls her eyes, seemingly annoyed by my
presence.

cm®
To be continued©
“TWENTY THREE”

NELLY PAGE.

Bhekifa doesn’t want to see me happy, this right here…

him standing here with that intimidating frownon his face
is proof. Lord, I hope he doesn’t start a fight with
Phakathi.
Bhekifa: “I asked you a question Nelly.”
The snapping is never a good sign, it means his
anger seeks attention.
Phakathi: “Bhekifa.”
Why is Phakathi getting up?
Phakathi: “Long time.”
And… he holds out his hand for a shake, Bhekifa
glares at it and clicks his tongue.
Me: “We’re having dinner, what else does it looklike?”
My words hit the warning button, I see his nose startto
flicker. His eyes burn with anger.
Bhekifa: “Is this who you’re cheating on me with?”What in
the heaven’s armies is he talking about?
Phakathi: “It’s not what you think bafo, we…”
(Brother.)
Bhekifa: “Piss off, I am not your brother, you idiot.”
Will I ever have peace in my life? Phakathi clears his
throat, clearly embarrassed by Bhekifa’s comebackand
disrespect.
Me: “There is no need for that Bhekifa, Phakathi is my
friend and I will not have you speak to him in that
manner.”
I would stand, but people are staring already. I might
appear on tonight’s 8pm news. ENCA lacks content, this
will definitely give them something to talk about.

Bhekifa: “A friend you say? With the way he looks into

your eyes, I would not be surprised if you haveopened
those legs for him.”
He throws the insult on my face, yet it stings myheart.
Phakathi: “Nelly, with your permission. May I ask himto
leave?”
Me: “Please do.”
I give consent, giving the husband from hell a coldstare.
Bhekifa: “I am not going anywhere without my wife.”Sure I
didn’t think it would be so easy.
Me: “Phakathi, this man is not allowed anywhere
near me. He is violating the restraining order.”
Bhekifa’s eyes pop out, something tells me, he hasforgotten
about it.
Bhekifa: “Don’t tell me about that piece of paper, I can
throw it in the fire. You’re coming with me Nelly,let’s go.”
His hand grab and my almost hushed scream catchethe
full attention of the customers. Dammit! This is what I
was trying to avoid, the public eye. Bhekifa is strong
enough to bring me to my feet, I yank my arm
away just as roughly.
Phakathi: “Bafo, I’m sure you don’t want to start afight
here.”
Okay, I give Phakathi the permission to punch this man.
Especially now that Bhekifa has pushed him and there he
goes stumbling across the floor, he regains his balance
before he crashes on one of thetables. The habitants
cautiously jump from their seats, almost spilling their
food in the process.

Me: “Are you insane? Why did you do that?”

I yell, he ignores me and tightly grabs my hand. I gasp at
the pain and the forceful pull toward the exit.
Me: “Let me go Bhekifa.”
I demand as he continues pulling me by the hand, Ilook
back, my eyes search for Phakathi. He’s marching
towards us, face drenched in anger.
People are taking videos and pictures. What is wrong
with this generation? All they care about isgetting
likes and recognition, forget about the
person’s sufferings. If I knew what was going to
happen tonight, I would have stayed at home.
Phakathi: “Bhekifa.”
Phakathi booms loud enough for Bhekifa to stop, hishand
still stuck on mine. In my head I’ve written a three page
prayer, asking God not to let Phakathi start a fight with
Bhekifa because he is a useless man and we don’t need
this stunt. But then, God is sometimes too busy. Phakathi
punches Bhekifa, theblow has him stumbling back. What
gives?
I’m freed from the prison of Bhekifa’s painful hold,but
here is the bad news. There are footages of mecaught
between two men. I wouldn’t be surprised ifI’m on
national television right at this moment. Theperfect love
couple, South Africa’s sweetheart.
Bhekifa Zulu and Nelly Page caught in a love web.Jesus fix
this.

-SABELO ZULU.
Rose should pick up her socks and that’s taking charge
in this house. My mother’s days are numbered, no I feel
it man… that woman is about tokick the bucket. It took
two weeks for her to convince me that she is not a witch,
still I don’t trusther, I sleep with one eye open, just in
case she triesanything stupid.
I cringe as I hear Rose vomiting in the bathroom andmy
stomach twists with a need to push the food out.She has
been in there for about an hour now. The same thing
happened yesterday, Rose better not be pregnant. We
can’t afford another child, two is too much.

Me: “Mmmhh, mmhh. Mama I can’t anymore. Howdoes

Rose expect us to eat while she’s throwing upso loudly?”
Mariam is just as annoyed, she frowns at me fromopposite
the couch.
Mariam: “I told you, she’s pregnant.”
Me: “Never, I refuse. I know I’m good mama, but
Rose is on birth control.”
Mariam: “Don’t say I didn’t tell you Sabelo, if that girl is
pregnant, then you better find her a place to stay. Iwill not
have another child in my house.”
She thinks I’m stupid, I see.
Me: “Why do you look guilty magriza?” (Old lady.)
Mariam: “What?”
This is what they do, they are good at playing
innocent.
Me: “Are you sure you didn’t plant anything in her
womb?”
Mariam: “Don’t start Sabelo, I’m not in the mood.”
Me: “I’m not starting anything, I’m only stating facts.A
sangoma mama, a whole sangoma called you a witch.
Those people never make mistakes.”
Mariam: “How many times must I tell you that I amnot
a witch Sabelo?”
And I’m supposed to take that and go with it? Me:
“That’s what all witches say, for all we know
Rose might be pregnant with a little snake. Oh no, Ican’t
breathe.”
I put my plate on the coffee table, the thought makesmy
stomach boil.
Mariam: “What is wrong with you?”
Me: “My wife is going to give birth to Chuckie, mamawhat
have you done?”
Mariam needs to stop throwing things at me, I mightlose
an eye. I duck when she throws a chicken boneat me.
Mariam: “Call this sangoma of yours and tell him to
confirm what he said.”
My eyes catch something on the TV just as I’mabout
to give my mother a befitting answer.

Me: “Yoh, yoh. Wamnandi mpilo.” (Life is nice.)

I jump from the couch with this expression to grabthe
remote so to increase the volume. Mariam follows my
eyes to see her son fighting on nationaltelevision. The
headlines read {South Africa’s most
loved couple, best-selling author Nelly Page and
husband Bhekifa Zulu catch the public’s attention
again.}

Me: “I knew someone still loved me up there, this isbetter

than watching Chiefs lose to Pirates.”
Mariam: “I knew the nurses dropped you after I gave
birth, I always questioned your big head only for me to
later question your stupidity as well. Nothing is right in
that big empty head of yours Sabelo, it’s filled with
nothing but water.”
I don’t care, she will spoil my mood. And Mariam better
finish that food, she is going to need all thestrength she can
gather to help her son out of thatmess.
Me: “Look at your son, magriza. Has he forgottenabout the
restraining order?”
Mariam: “Your happiness baffles me, Sabelo. That isyour
brother dammit.”
So? That doesn’t change anything.
Me: “Magriza.” (Old lady.)
I sing as I pull her into a hug and place a kiss on hercheek.
Me: “Thank you for giving me a is’dididi for a
brother.” (Idiot.)
Of course she will push me away, this is where
Bhekifa gets his violence from.
“What’s going on?”
Rose questions as she walks into the living room, seeing her
takes me back to when she was vomiting.I’m disgusted once
again.
Me: “Did you brush your teeth?”
Heee! This woman is shaking her head no.
Me: “Go brush your teeth man, Yeses Rose. Umdala”
(You’re old.)
She shrugs her shoulders and goes back to where she
came from. I sit back to watch the show, whilemy mother
is drowning in worry.
-NELLY PAGE.

Bhekifa and Phakathi tackled each other like animals,I

couldn’t stay there. Everything was overwhelming,
someone had the news anchors on standby. Sounds
farfetched I know, but how did they get there so fast?My
life is over, my personal life is out there for the world to
see. Lord, how did I get so unlucky?
I must have lost track of time driving back home thatI don’t
realise when I pull up at the gate, it’s open andmy parents
and brother are outside.
Thokozani rushes to open the gate, I’m thinking hewill
wait for me to drive in, but he runs to my side ofthe car.
Concern pasted on his face, he opens the door and sighs
heavily as our eyes meet.
My vision is blurred by tears that insisted on throwing a
party on my face since I left the restaurant. Emotions
dribble me and I’m tearing up again, Thokozani helps me
out of the car and without wasting anymore time,
suffocates me into ahug. This is the safest I have felt in
hours.
Me: “Zaza…”
Zani: “I know, it’s okay. I’m here now.”
He comforts me along with his hands that are stroking my
back, everything I have been throughcomes budging in.
The emotional and physical abuse, the cheating. The look
of unworthiness in Bhekifa’s eyes when he would look at
me… It feelslike I am stuck in a bubble filled with water
and I can’t breathe, no matter how hard I try.

The emotions don’t give me time to suck in air, but push

me down. The impact has me bursting in tears,my knees
give in, sinking me to the floor. Thokozanicatches me
before I fall and scoops me up in his arms. I hold on lest I
fall and hide my teary face on his chest.
“Oh my baby.”
I hear my mother’s cracking voice, pain painted inher
voice. We get to my room and he places me onthe bed,
my mother is here with a glass of water.
Mom: “Drink baby.”
She says, holding me the glass. I take a sip through my
sobs, Thokozani is angry. His eyes tell me so andhis
clenched fists and jaw.

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Me: “Where are the kids?”

Mom: “Sleeping.”
Me: “Please tell me they didn’t see anything.”
Mom: “Don’t worry, they were in their rooms.”
Mom: “What happened?”
I can’t do this now.
Me: “I’m tired ma, can we not get into it?”
I find it hard to ignore my brother who is red with anger,
his chest rising and falling from exasperation.Our eyes meet,
for a second I think I know what he isthinking. I might be
wrong.
Zani: “What were you doing there?”
His voice is profound, he wants to scold me like a child. I
see it in his eyes and have picked it up in thetone of his
voice.
Me: “I had gone out with a friend, I didn’t think
Bhekifa would be there.”
Mom: “Bhekifa has violated the restraining order, thepolice
won’t spare him this time.”
Thokozani scoffs.
Zani: “Come on ma, this is South Africa. Bhekifa hasenough
money to buy a Cocacola truck, it will be soeasy for him to
bribe his way out of this.”
Something diabolical is running through his mind.
Zani: “I’m going to deal with him myself.”
Mom: “No, you will do no such thing. No child of
mine will go to jail.”
Bhekifa is the one who belongs in jail, I hope that’swhere he
is.
Zani: “Qhawekazi.” (Queen.)
He does a mini head bow, a frown on his face.
Zani: “Forgive me, but I can’t let this go. Not after
feeling my sister tremble in my arms while crying
because of that man.”
He finishes and marches out of the room, his steps are so
fast that by the time my mother wants to stophim, he is out
the door.
Mom: “You have to stop him.”
I will do no such thing, I lie down on the bed and pullthe
covers up.

cm®
To be continued©
“TWENTY FOUR”

CHERYL ZIKHALI.

“Thank you for coming to my aid.” I tell Jabu as I

jump into his car.
Jabu: “What are you doing here?”
Me: “You don’t want to know.”
I have seen it all in life, but this... Bhekifa completely
forgot that I was there, I wasn’t looking at the man I
adored but an abuser. The way he spoke and
manhandled his wife raised so many red flags, I wanted
to intervene, maybe get him to stop. The man was too
angry to be told what to do, I couldn’t help him when the
police came. He was arrested along with Mike Tyson.

Jabu: “Cheryl.”
His voice cuts my thoughts, I glance at him from the
passenger’s seat.
Jabu: “You’re far deep in thought, what happened to
you?”
Me: “You know the show date from hell?”
Jabu: “Yeah.”
Me: “Well, what was missing was the TV crew.”
Jabu: “Did he try to stab you or something?”
Me: “No, guy is married. He saw his wife with
another man, lost whatever dignity he had and
attacked the poor man. He’s in jail as we speak.”
Jabu: “You date married men now?”
The condemnation in the tone of his voice is louderthan the
voice itself.
Me: “He told me they were separated.”
Jabu: “You need to stay away from him, he will getyou
into trouble.”
Me: “What do you mean?”
Jabu: “Married men are dangerous, he will roll with
you and use you. But at the end of the day, he will gohome to
his wife and here’s the thing, he will never leave his wife for
you.”
Like I don’t know that, I liked Bhekifa way before hetold me
he separated from his wife. I liked him knowing he was
married.
Me: “So what do I do with these feeling I have forhim?”
Jabu: “Are you kidding me?”
Me: “Yes, now relax.”
I have to play it cool with Jabu, or he will note myidiocy. I
won’t lie to myself, I am worried about Bhekifa, although
I’m scared of him now.

-BHEKIFA ZULU.

I can’t believe my luck, my reputation will be ruined ifI

keep finding myself behind bars. I don’t understandthis
bad omen that is following me, I have always been a good
citizen. Never got into trouble with the
law, now jail seems to be my second home.
I couldn’t stand seeing Nelly with this man, yes this
man… We are locked up in the same cell. Phakathi is
curled up in a corner, head cast down. He better keep it
down, I am still not satisfied with the beatingI gave him. I
wanted to teach him never to look at mywife again.
I was given one phone call, my lawyer said there is
nothing he can do now. It’s late, the judge is homewith
his family. Funny how they think we don’t havefamilies
to get home to.
Speaking of family, I miss my babies. They must be
wondering where I am, I need to speak to my lawyer.I
can’t lose them, Nelly is fuming and she will do anything
to keep me away from my kids. The last time we spoke
she had mentioned a divorce, I haven’t gotten the papers.
I will surely burn them, noway am I going to divorce that
woman. Till death do us part.

-NELLY PAGE.
Nelly wake up”
My brother’s voice awakens me out of a deep sleep,my
lids flicker open to find him standing by the bedside. He
still has the frown he had when he bolted out of the house.
I fish for my phone under the pillow to check the time, it’s
very late. Somethingmust’ve happened for him to be in
here at this time.
Me: “Zaza?”
The distress on his face sets me up on the bed, I patthe side
for him to sit. He sighs and follows the gesture.
Me: “What happened?”
Zani: “Bhekifa is in jail.”
Is this why I was woken up? Nelly we're having cakeor it’s
snowing in Johannesburg… that I would haveunderstood.
Me: “Okay.”
My eyes question him.
Zani: “I was ready to kill him.”
He confesses, it’s the confidence in the way he saysit that
has me shifting uncomfortably.
Me: “Zaza?”
My voice is a whispered shock.
Zani: “I had a gun, loaded with three bullets.”
Do I want to hear this?
Zani: “One for his useless d**k, one for his black
heart and the last one was going to go through his
head.”
I pull the blanket up as chills kiss every inch of myskin,
there is no expression now on his face. No regret, guilt or
any sign to show that he’s human.
Zani: “I had it all planned out, a premeditated
murder.”
A cold quiet laughter departs between the seams ofhis lips,
his face though lacks the humour. It is as dry as biltong.
Zani: “Thank the ancestors he wasn’t home when I
got there, or your brother would be a murderer.”

Can’t he do it traditionally like the others? I’m kidding,geez

relax people.
Me: “I’m glad you didn’t find him, I don’t want you getting
in trouble because of me. I will be fine Zaza, Ipromise.”
Zani: “Come to Cape town with me.”
Me: “I can’t do that, the kids have school and…”
Zani: “You’ll transfer them into a new school, Nelly Ican’t
protect you from there.”
Me: “I know you mean well, but my life is here andthe
kids will have a hard time adjusting to a new
environment.”
He is not pleased with my answer.
Zani: “You know he will never stop, right? If Bhekifa was
able to fight for you in public, then he is more dangerous
than we thought. It might not be now or tomorrow, but he
is going to unravel one day and I’mafraid that his wrath
will fall on you.”
Is this his way of scaring me? Because it is working.

Zani: “I would stay if I could, but I don’t belong to

myself, you know that. Please don’t hide anythingfrom
dad, he will protect you.”
My heart breaks thinking that my brother is going to
leave.
Me: “I promise.”
My arms wrap around him, he holds me back and
drops a kiss on the top of my head.
Zani: “Ngiyak’thanda dadewethu.” (I love you sis.)
That’s a first, I’m always the one to show and tell my
affections. Now I’m worried about him.
Me: “Are you okay Zaza?”
I ask, moving out of his arms. He nods, maybe I’m
overthinking things.
Me: “I love you too.”
My proclamation is enough to make him smile.
-SABELO ZULU.

“Drive faster man.”

My mother orders, I had to borrow a car from a friend
because this woman wants to go see her sonat 11pm. Her
peers are sleeping, 3am is around thecorner. She will be
tired by that time and miss work.
Me: “I can’t drive any faster than this magriza, I don’twant
to die because of Bhekifa. People die on the freeway and
roam around the streets as lost souls.
I’m not ready to be highway-Sabelo, yoh I would beone
good looking ghost. Imagine… You have to buryme in an
expensive suit, Gucci or Lois Vuitton. Chaii,I will be a
high grade ghost, scaring all the rich people.”
Why does it suddenly sound better than being alive?Poverty
visited me the second I was born and has dwelt with me
since.
Mariam: “A what?”
Me: “High grade ghost, levels magriza, levels.”
Mariam: “Tell me, why am I entertaining you?”Trick
question.
Me: “You don’t have a life, and I’m the only one who
brightens up your day.”
Couldn’t have said it any better.
Mariam: “The only reason I still get to see your ugly face is
because you’re my son. I should’ve done the needful and
sent you to your aunt in Potchefstroom.”
Me: “Where is that? Don’t talk about useless places
mama, you need to thank God that I’m here. Withoutme,
Nelly would have showed you, your mother.”
Mariam groans at the mention of her daughter in-law.

Mariam: “Bhekifa will never come right in life as longas

he continues to associate himself with that woman.”
Me: “Khethile Khethile, he’s obsessed with Nelly andthere is
no turning back.” (He has chosen.)
Mariam: “That’s nothing I can’t fix. Nelly will soon be
nothing, but a bad memory.”
We’re here, I park at the parking lot. I will let her go in
alone. I don’t want to be embarrassed by the police,
visiting hours are over. Knowing my mother will trouble
me, I sink down on the seat and face ahead.
Mariam: “Let’s go.”
Yoh…
Me: “Where?”
I’m not going anywhere.
Me: “Go and make a fool of yourself mama, I willwait
here.”
Mariam: “What will I say when I get there? I thoughtyou
were going to do the talking.”
Mageba come and witness this moment with me,the
woman known as my mother has finally accepted that
I am useful.
Me: “I’m also shy mama, if I go with you we’ll stare atthe
policeman like two idiots.”
If lying will save me from this depressing trip, thenbring all
the lies you can gather. Huh! I will not die because of
Mariam and Bhekifa.

Mariam: “Sabelo, your brother needs you.”

Me: “He can need me in the morning, hurry magriza.It’s
almost 12am, the witch hour is approaching. Wedon’t
want you transforming in front of people, we burn
witches in this country, we don’t play.” (Old lady.)
Mariam: “Voetsek, I will kill you, Sabelo. Do you hear
me?” (Piss off.)
She smacks my head, the slap is hard and painful.Her
temper though tickles, causing me to laugh outloud.
Me: “Hade magriza, can’t you take a joke hau?” (I’m
sorry.)
Mariam: “Let’s go.”
Me: “Shame, you can miss me on this one. Pleasehurry.”
Today she will see how serious I can get, she jolts out of
the car with a tongue click and bangs the door.I should get
Nelly to write a book about Mariam,
such an easy book it will be. All she has to do isdescribe
tongue clicks.
(Mariam’s POV)
“Click, click, click.”

I mean that’s how the woman communicates, especially

when she’s angry. I am one unlucky man.

cm®
To be continued©
“TWENTY FIVE”

NELLY PAGE.

The restaurant fight trended for a week, I was relieved

when it died down. Unfortunately, my kids found out
about it from friends at school and that their father was
arrested. They didn’t take it well, especially Ayanda, she
is the most affected. I have been meaning to sit them down
and tell them aboutthe divorce, I don’t know how this co-
parenting thingwill work. What I’m aware of is that I
can’t keep my kids away from their father, it is not their
fault that we didn’t work out.

“A minute?”
My boss says, her face dipped in my office door. It’snot good
when she pops by your office, either I did something wrong
or a client is not happy about the service. I nod as an
answer to her question, she was
going to come in anyway. Lydia has a poker face, one we
call a bitch-face. A successful black womanwho continues
to climb her way up the cooperate ladder, every woman I
know in this place wants to beher.

Me: “A visit from you is never good.”

My joke is kicked out the window when she doesn’treceive
it, I clear my throat to rid the awkwardness.She tosses a
white A4 envelope on the table.
Lydia: “A former employee is taking us to CCMA.”
She tells me with a straight face, I don’t raise my eyes to
her, I would rather look at these documents in my hands.
Buhle? I should have known, it is statedthat I dismissed
her unfairly. I should have known that she would fight
me, trouble seems to follow meeverywhere.
Lydia: “What you did was careless Nelly.” Me:
“Her sleeping with my husband wasn’t?”
My tongue slipped, you don’t talk to Lydia like she
owes you child maintenance. I would like to returnthe cold
glare she gives me, but I still want my job.
Lydia: “We don’t mix business with our personal lives,you
should know better.”
Yes ma’am. Geez!!!
Me: “I couldn’t keep Buhle anymore, she was
incompetent and missed worked whenever she feltlike it.
I had to run after her just so she stays in her lane.”
Lying isn’t always bad, look at me ready to kick myproblems
out the window with this one lie.
Lydia: “This Buhle person has become a threat to my
company, fix this.”
Me: “How? I can’t take her back.”
Lydia: “I don’t care what you do, fix this mess. Gether
to back off, I can’t afford to have this companystained. I
have worked so much…”
Blah… Blah… Blah! I mentally roll my eyes as she tellsme a
story about how she built this company singlehandedly
and… whatever. I don’t care… I have
heard this story before, it was inspiring at first. Nowit is
used as shovel to bury us with guilt whenever we trip and
fall. Can she stop already?
Me: “I will see what I can do Lydia.”
I am not giving Buhle her job back, what will I tell mynew
PA? She has settled in just fine and she is morehands on
with the work than that homewrecker.
Lydia: “Good.”
Argh!
Lydia: “You have a week to clear this out.”
How the hell am I going to get Buhle to back off? Her
attitude ticks me off, I have enough going on as it is. I
watch Lydia catwalk her way out of my office, may she
trip on that long weave and fall for being a pain.These
are days I wish I had my own company,
maybe it’s time I took writing as a career. It pays well,I
would be set for life.

-BHEKIFA ZULU.
Cheryl has been avoiding me for about a month, it doesn’t
help that she works on a different floor. I have thought of
keeping my distance, it would be soeasy if she didn’t
knock in my head once in a while. Itry to forget her, but
she keeps burning in the back ofmy mind. I should talk to
their supervisor and get herback on this floor.

I’m buried in work when I get an email from my PA

reminding me of the business function this Friday. Ihave
been nominated for businessman of the year, Ibagged it
last year and this year should be no different. Nelly
suddenly comes to mind, after that incident at Dros
restaurant she has been avoiding me. I’m glad the media
didn’t put two and two together. The separation is still a
secret.

I must be an idiot to be attracted to Cheryl while married to

Nelly, I call my PA and send for Cheryl. It’salmost midday,
it gets quiet around this time. Ten minutes later, a soft
knock has me raising my head
from the laptop. She is here, a smile traces my lipsat the
sight of her. She doesn’t return it, instead stands by the
door with folded arms.

Me: “Please come in.”

My voice is soft and welcoming. I gave her a bad
impression that day and I want to make things right.Relief
smiles upon me when she gradually strides in,her eyes are
unashamedly piercing into mine. I movefrom my desk to get
to her.
Me: “How have you been?”
Cheryl: “Good.”
That’s all she gives.
Me: “How is your daughter?”
I don’t know how to start this, I’m a nervous idiot.
Cheryl: “Sia is fine, she’s her normal self again. Isthere
anything I can help you with Mr. Zulu?”
She has got to be kidding me, is she still upset overwhat
happened a month ago?
Me: “Look, I’m sorry I forgot about you that day. Thatwas
rude of me.”
Cheryl: “I’m over that.”
She shrugs her shoulders like she doesn’t care. Thenwhat is
the problem?
Me: “I thought you were upset with me.”
Cheryl: “I was, I got over it.”
She seems different.
Me: “Okay, still I am sorry. Can I take you out? I wantto
make it up to you.”
I want to take her hand into mine, but I don’t know ifit’s a
good idea.
Cheryl: “You’re a nice person Mr. Zulu, but…”
Mr. Zulu? We’re back to being formal?
Cheryl: “I think you should focus on fixing your
marriage, it was made clear to me that you still loveyour
wife…”
Me: “We’re separated, there is nothing between Nellyand
me. I haven’t seen her in a month.”
I want to do this, I know I do. I want someone to holdmy
hand again and love me and make me feel like I matter.
Cheryl: “How sure are you that it’s completely over?”Me:
“A hundred percent, we are done.”
Her eyes scan my wedding ring.
Cheryl: “As long as you’re wearing that, you two arestill
together. Living in separate houses means nothing.”
Me: “The ring means nothing now.”
What the hell am I saying? Cheryl huffs, calling meout on
my lie.
Cheryl: “What exactly do you want from me?”

For some reason, I rush to lock the door and finallytake her
hand into mine. It’s so warm.
Me: “I want to be with you, I want you to give me a
chance.”
I must be drunk with something, the heart really is a
strange organ.
Cheryl: “You’re married.”
Me: “What is that? Is it a disease or something? Please tell
me, I’m not dying, I haven’t kissed you in awhile, I can’t die
yet.”
Cheryl laughs at my dramatics.
Cheryl: “I’m serious, if you want us to be togetheryou
need to divorce your wife.”

Tough decision to make, maybe it is time.Me:

“If you let me kiss you... maybe…” Cheryl:
“We’re at work Bhekifa.”
We’re back to first name basis, I’m winning.Me:
“I locked the door.”
I say, already leaned in and brushing my lips on hers.I
finally get to taste her lips, her kiss is sweet and
unfortunately lasts for a second.
Cheryl: “I need to go back to work, I’m clocking off
early today.”
Me: “Spend the weekend with me?”
I need a smack on the mouth. How did that questionleave
my mouth? She shakes her head, clothing mewith a cloak
of disappointment.
Cheryl: “I can’t, my mother is not around so it’s justme
and the kids.”
Me: “How about we do dinner tomorrow?”
Cheryl: “I’ll be free sometime next week, I’ll let youknow.”
I hope this is not her, kindly rejecting me, I kiss heragain
to make sure. She returns it, we’re still good.
Cheryl: “I have to go.”
This is the first time seeing her shy side, I let her outwith a
little hope that I will see her again.

-NELLY PAGE.
It must be stupid of me to ask Buhle to meet up withme for
lunch, it’s not like I have a choice. Dragon Lydia will bite
my head off if I don’t do this. Wimpy!
This is what she opted for. Typical… She openly rollsher
eyes when she sees me approach, one thing I donot miss
about her. I’m still praying someone gauges those ugly
eyes out, so she never looks at married men again.
Me: “Hi.”
I have to be nice… I’m sorry, I mean I have to pretendto
be nice. She is almost halfway done with the burger that
has created a mess on her plate. Picky eater, the tomato
has been placed aside along with olives. I don’t know if
it’s still a burger or a roll with meat.
Buhle: “Are you going to stand there while I eat? Howrude
for an elegant woman like you.”
Still insolent I see… Don’t mind her Nelly, wear yourbest
fake smile. You need her remember? I slide in the red
chair opposite her.
Me: “Ten minutes is what I have.”
I tell her, so she can stop slurping on that strawberry
milkshake and give me her attention.
Buhle: “I don’t have money to pay for this, since youfired
me. So if you don’t mind…”
She is not asking by the way, two hundred should be enough.
I fish for my wallet and place it on the tray, itmust be
Mandela’s face that causes her to frown because this is
more than enough to cover the bill.
Buhle: “I ordered desert as well.”
She says, loudly slurping on the milkshake again.Lydia
has done it, she made me do this. This is humiliating.
You know what?
Me: “Cut the crap Buhle, what do you want fromme?”

Buhle knows damn well what I’m talking about, the

innocent look does not fool me.
Buhle: “I’m a single mother Nelly, unemployed and
broke. My baby daddy refuses to acknowledge hischild
because his wife told him so.”
Me: “What are you talking about?”
The eye roll again, this fork would do wonders if Ishove it in
her eyes.
Buhle: “You told Bhekifa to stop supporting his son,didn’t
you?”
Me: “Whatever you and Bhekifa decided on has
nothing to do with me. I came here for the case,
you’re taking us to CCMA.”
The witch chuckles lowly, she thinks this is a joke.

Buhle: “It was about time, don’t you think? And no, I
don’t want the job back. I hated that place.”
Me: “What do you want then?”
Buhle: “My baby daddy, I’m willing to be a side
chick.”
The urge to smack her to hell and back…
Buhle: “Let’s face it, Bhekifa is moneyed. I doubt youneed
him, you’re doing well. Book sells are skyrocketing and you
have a stable job. While I on
the other hand have nothing, my son has nothing. Heneeds
his father.”
The gods must be smoking snuff, this cannot be
happening to me.
Me: “That’s your condition? You will back off if I giveyou
Bhekifa?”

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She laughs, like the idiot she is.

Buhle: “Clever girl.”
I hate her.
Me: “You need help, you’re sick.”
Locked up, perhaps that will have her thinking
straight because now she is on a train to
Sterkfontein.
Buhle: “Well then prepare to pay up.”
How To Get Away With Murder? Or Criminal Minds? I
must have learnt something there. I have to fabricatea lie
to get her to back off. I can’t entertain her, I have to fetch
the kids from school. I plan on telling them today after
supper, maybe I should take them out to a movie. I would
be deemed a bad mom
because it’s a school night, but I’m desperate. I needto
soften them up before I break their little hearts.

Me: “Let me think about it, Bhekifa is his own person.I

can’t make him do things he doesn’t want.”
I lie, the fool has no clue that we’re separated.
Buhle: “He doesn’t have to know the plan, you leadhim
to me and I will take care of the rest.”
Buhle’s craziness is getting out hand, I fake a smile.Me: “I’ll
call you.”
I say as I drop a R50 note on the table and walk without
looking back. Next time I will pay extra attention when
watching ‘The Perfect Murder.’ I amready to kill someone.

I deeply apologize for the late delivery Admin had

commitments beyond control.
Thank you for understanding.
“TWENTY SIX”

NELLY PAGE.

I miss Thokozane, he would know what to do in this

situation. The kids have gone mute on me after I have told
them about the broken marriage. I knew they wouldn’t
understand, what I didn’t expect is theheavy silence.
Me: “Won’t you guys say something?”
I ask them, they are packed on the corner couch, heads
dropped and arms folded across their chests.No one says
anything, and I would give anything to hear their opinions.
“I hate him.”
That’s Victor’s voice, and God no, I don’t want him tohate
his father. His eyes raise to meet mine, insteadof seeing
tears, I see a condemnation.
Victor: “I hate him, mom.”
He repeats and this time the other kids glance up athim
inquisitively, Victor keeps his gaze on me as hestands to
sit beside me.
Me: “Baby, you can’t hate your father.”
Victor: “But I do mom, I hate him for what he did toyou.”
What is he talking about?
Victor: “I know dad used to hit you, that’s why youleft
him.”
This child… I never told them anything of the sort.
Ayanda jolts up from the seat and I instantly knowthis
is not going to be good.
Ayanda: “You’re a liar Vic, dad would never do that.”
She screams at her brother, Ayanda is too young tobe
hearing such things.
Victor: “Ayanda sit down, I know what I’m talking
about, okay?”
Ayanda: “Well you’re lying, I know my dad. He would
never hurt anyone, he loves us. It’s all mom’s fault,
everything is.”
Luvo: “Ayanda!”
My second born Luvo reprimands her, Ayanda is not
touched.
Me: “Baby…”
Ayanda: “No, I will never forgive you for this.”
She shouts before storming out of the living room.Me:
“Ayanda!”
What’s the use of calling her back? The child neverlistens to
me.
Luvo: “I’ll check on her.”
The two boys follow each other out, leaving me withmy
eldest.

Victor: “Don’t worry mom, I will take care of you.

When I grow up I’m going to be a lawyer and I will
protect you from dad.”
Me: “Your father is not a bad person Victor, what
happens between us should not be your concern. Idon’t
want you to hate him. He will never hurt you.”
Victor: “But he hurt you.”
Me: “Adults hurt each other sometimes, but we fix
things at the end of the day. Don’t let hatred stay inyour
heart, you’re too young for that, tell your siblings as
well.”
Victor nods, his eyes tell me he doesn’t agree with me.
Bhekifa will have to fix his mess. I can’t erase the
moments he put tears on my face, the momentshe made
me feel inferior. But that doesn’t mean thekids deserve to
live without their father.

-CHERYL ZIKHALI.

“I thought I told you to stay away from married men,now

you’re telling me he asked you out and you agreed?”
Maybe I shouldn’t have told him, Jabu thinks he hasthe
right to dictate my life.
Me: “I am not a child Jabu, do not speak to me likethat.”
I should have taken the bus, asking him to fetch mewas a
mistake.
Jabu: “I just don’t understand Cheryl and why him?
What do you see in him anyway?”
Me: “Why not him?”
Jabu: “Firstly, he is a businessman and you’re a
cleaner. The man is out of your league.”
Me: “Gee, thanks for the vote of confidence.”
Jabu: “I’m serious, he probably wants somethingfrom
you.”
I will never hear the end of this, what a long trip thisis
going to be.
Me: “Stop the car.”
I don’t care if we are in the middle of nowhere, I can’tbe
around a person who thinks less of me.
Jabu: “Don’t be ridiculous, I’m not doing that.”
Me: “Then stop with your nonsense Jabu, in whatbook
does it say the rich can’t mingle with peoplelike us?”
Jabu: “I didn’t say that, but this man is married forPete’s
sake. He wants something from you.”
Me: “What? My virginity?”
Stupid.
Jabu: “This is not a joke Cheryl, think of your kids.You
told me that you saw a different side to him when he
attacked that man at the restaurant.”
Me: “Yeah people mess up, that’s life. It doesn’tdefine
who they are.”
Jabu: “I hope you know what you’re doing, I don’t
want to say I told you so.”
I will not justify his statement with an answer, I’m abig
girl and I do know what I’m doing.

-NELLY PAGE.

I dread calling Bhekifa, but I have no choice. Ayandahas

locked herself in her room, that child is going togive me
grey hairs.
“He’s here.”
My mother says as she approaches from the kitchen,I
would hide, but I don’t want to be a coward anymore.
Those days are over, besides, my father is here.
Dad: “Go to your room Nelly.”
What did I say about hiding?
Me: “I’m okay dad, I don’t want him to think I’m
afraid of him.”
I say, keeping in mind that Bhekifa feeds on fear likea
demon.
Mom: “Are you sure? We’ll keep an eye on him.”
Me: “You really don’t have to, I want my daughter to
know that I’m here for her as well. She thinks Bhekifais
innocent in all this.”
Not a minute passes and there is a soft knock at thedoor, my
mother rushes to open.
“Ma.” I hear his voice for the first time in a month,
suddenly Buhle comes to mind. That girl must havebeen
a demon in her past life.
Mom: “Come in.”
I watch as my mother makes way for Bhekifa, his eyes
find me before anything else. He stands with his hands on
his back, a subtle smile on his face. Fora minute I see the
good old Bhekifa, it feels strange that we are slowly
becoming strangers.
Bhekifa: “Baba.”
My father and his arrogance, he responds with a nod.Dad:
“Ayanda is in her room.”
Me: “I will take him.”
I don’t want him poisoning my baby in my absence,we
leave my parents and head to Ayanda’s room.
Bhekifa: “How are you?”
Me: “Fine.”
Bhekifa: “You look different.”
I’m not up for a conversation with him, I will keep mymouth
shut. I don’t owe him anything, I step aside when we get to
the room. The door is still locked, I gesture that Bhekifa
knocks.
Bhekifa: “Ayanda, please open for daddy.”
He says above a whisper while softly knocking on the
door, the spoiled brat is quick to open. With eyesfilled with
tears, she throws herself at him. Bhekifa scoops her up
and I follow them inside.
Ayanda: “I don’t want you here, get out.”
The child yells as she clings to her father’s neck. She’s
shouting at me, her mother. I don’t care if sheis sitting on
her father’s lap, I will smack her senseless.
Bhekifa: “Baby no, we don’t talk to adults like that.”
I guess I’m just going to stand in the middle of theroom like I
didn’t bring this child into the world.
Ayanda: “But it’s her fault that we don’t live with you
anymore.”
Bhekifa: “No it’s not, your mother and I are not
perfect. We had to go our separate ways, becausewe
couldn’t live with each other anymore, but thatdoesn’t
mean we don’t love each other.”
Ayanda: “I don’t understand, people that love each
other stay together. Why do you guys have to be
apart?”
Bhekifa turns his gaze to me, I’m not going to meddle. He
needs to fix this, he’s the mistake maker,not me.
Bhekifa: “It’s like you, when you had to be transferredto the
next grade that is the circle of life baby. Thereare people
that are destined to be together and thereare people that
aren’t. Your mom and I will always love you and your
brothers, nothing will ever changethat.”
He’s doing good, I didn’t see this coming.
Ayanda: “But I want us all to be together under the
same roof.”
This is going to be a long night.

-SABELO ZULU.

Time surely flies, it’s moving a hundred miles an

hour and I don’t understand how I still don’t have the
house to myself. My dear mother should be walkingwith a
stick by now, her peers are pushing wheelchairs, but she
is as strong as a horse.
“You better be thinking about me.”
Can’t a man take a break from his wife? A second isall I
needed, hence I came to the back yard for a breather. Yet
Rose sees it fit to follow me.
Me: “Is the house on fire?”
Rose: “No..”
She replies with a frown playing on her face.Me:
“Are you pregnant?”
Rose: “No Sabelo.”
Why is she giggling?”
Me: “Is my mother dead?”
Rose: “No.”
Dammit! She takes the frown again, I told this
woman I want to be alone.
Me: “If there is no emergency, then what are youdoing
here?”
She’s pulling a chair, Shembe stop this woman.
Rose: “I’m worried about you.”
Huh!
Me: “Am I dying?”
Rose: “Stop it with the silly questions.”
Sabelo: “No Rose, I just don’t understand why you are
here after I specifically told you that I don’t wantto be
disturbed. Now look, you’re sitting next to me.”
I move my chair away from her.
Rose: “You have been quiet lately, I’m worried aboutyou.”
Hau! People waste their worry tokens like this?
Shame!
Me: “Life Rose, life. You wouldn’t understand, you’re
married to us’gaqagaqa (a tough guy.) A provider, allyou
should worry about is hair and makeup.”
“Is this where you’re all hiding?”
Great, let’s invite the whole nation here. A man cannever
have peace in this place. My mother stands with her
hands on her hips, she is frowning at Rose and I know
why. Rose has been given all the household duties, from
cleaning to cooking. She isprobably running from her
mother in-law, that’s whyshe is here.
Me: “Call the kids, call Zodwa from next door, her
husband should be home by now, call him as well and
their children. Don’t forget Gertrude from acrossthe
street, that one likes visiting people. Oh and Thiza, the
crazy man who lives under the bridge. Callthem mama,
call them.”
Mariam: “Why? What’s going on?”
Rose: “Are you throwing a party?”
These people are idiots.
Me: “Party for what? Since you people are all here,
invading my personal space. Why not invite everyone,let’s
have an “annoy Sabelo party.”
I can’t breathe in this place.
Mariam: “I have the numbers to Sterkfontein on
speed dial, I won’t hesitate to use them if you
continue like a crazy person.”
Me: “I would rather live with them than with you
people.”
Mariam: “Then go, you would fit perfectly there.”I
need to get out of here.
Mariam: “What is your problem anyway?”If
only she knew.
Me: “There’s this car I saw on TV the other day, sincethen I
haven’t been able to sleep.”
Mariam: “You’re grumpy because of a car you can’t
afford?”
Me: “That’s the whole point magriza, I can’t affordthe
damn car.”
Mariam bends over to remove a sandal from her foot,I
jump behind Rose when she tosses it my way.
Mariam: “Are you saying damn to me wena Sabelo?”
Hiabo! It’s always ‘crazy’ that knocks, never death.Me:
“No mama, I said the damn car.”
Mariam: “You’re repeating it Sabelo.”
Me: “Yoh hai, Zodwa has dealt with you mama. You have
to send it back to her, hai ngeke phela.” (Never.)
I should leave this yard.
Me: “I only want a car, will I be crucified for that?”
Mariam: “You can’t even afford a pair of underwear,how
will you afford a car.”
If you find time, please die.
Me: “Insurance money.”
Mariam: “From where?”
Me: “Your insurance magriza, let’s face it, you havelived.
It’s been long overdue, I promise to buy you abeautiful
coffin…”
I have it all planned out.
Mariam: “The only person who is going to die here isyou,
how could you say that to me?”
Me: “But you just said the same thing to me.”
Mariam: “I’m going to deal with you, Sabelo.”
Me: “Relax mama, can’t you take a joke?”
Yoh, people can’t joke in life. Seriously though, whenis her
time?

cm®
To be continued©
“TWENTY SEVEN”

SABELO ZULU.

“No mama, you can’t do this to me, you can’t. You had
Bhekifa from the moment he was born and nowthat he
wants me, you’re jealous.”
My mother is not serious, at this age she wants togo to
a business function.
Mariam: “What do you mean he wants you? My sononly
wants an escort to the event.”
Me: “Yes, I will escort my brother.”
I emphasize on the word brother, Bhekifa belongs toall of
us.
Mariam: “I don’t care what you say Sabelo, I’m readyto
go. You’re staying here with your wife.”
We shall see, I know my mother is not going
anywhere.
Mariam: “Imagine wearing my best dress only to
stay at home.”
You should see what she’s wearing, even Somizi’smother
would never have been seen wearing thisugly thing she
calls a dress.
Me: “Okay magriza, you go. Rose and I will watch the
awards on TV.”
Mariam Zulu has not met me yet. I take a sit on thecouch, I
want to see something. The time states almost 7pm, the
awards start at 8pm and Bhekifa should be here by now.
Me: “Mama, remember the dress I bought you forChristmas
last year.”
Mariam: “The one you bought with my money?”
Me: “Ok’salayo (still) I bought you a dress magriza.Be
grateful hau.”
The tongue click is like that family friend who thinksthey
can now open the fridge and jump on the couch.It’s forever
present.
Me: “Bhekifa’s suit matches with that dress, I thinkyou
should wear it. You will look better than Bonang
and you know how stylish that woman is.”The
smile on her face... shame.
Mariam: “You think?”
No…
Me: “Yes magriza, if I lie, my mother will be crippledfor
life.”
Lord, see the things we speak into existence. Is ittoo
early to celebrate my mother being in a wheelchair?
Me: “Bonang has nothing on you, you should be
queen of South Africa. Yes, yes queen M.”
The mothers we are given in this world, look at thisone,
smiling like she is really better than Bonang.
Mariam: “Okay, let me change fast. Tell Bhekifa towait
for me when he gets here.”
Me: “Sho sho griza, bathathe Maristo. Mariza, thegranny of
all grannies.” (Show them Mariam.)
Clap hands for me, she likes my praises.
It’s not a second when she’s gone that I hear
Bhekifa’s car pull up, I jump to peek through the window
and it’s him. Mariam won’t have a chance torun out since
she’s changing.
Me: “Mama, don’t worry I took your Tupperware. I
will bring you leftovers.”
I shout to my mother from her bedroom door, run out of
the house like my life is in danger and lock thedoor behind
me.

CHERYL ZIKHALI.

Things seem to be looking up lately, I didn’t think I would

get the job at the call centre. I will be starting on Monday.
This is a new start for me, finally I will beable to bring
something valuable home.
Me: “Mama.”
I rush to her bedroom the second I walk into the house, I
need to tell her the good news. This womansleeps a lot
lately, I’m worried about her.
Me: “Are you okay?”
I enquire, settling on the edge of the bed. She raisesan arm
for a quick stretch, before her lips build a ghost of a
smile.
Mom: “I was cleaning the house today, I’m just tiredthat’s
all.”
Me: “You overwork yourself, you’re not younganymore.
You need to take it easy.”
She always finds something to do around here.
Mom: “You look happy, what is it?”
A smile takes over my lips as she reminds me of thenew
job.
Me: “I got the job.”
I expected the light in her eyes, she takes time to situp and
leans back on the headboard.
Mom: “I’m happy for you.”
Me: “I’m happy for me too, where are the kids?”
Mom: “You didn’t see Jabu in the living room? He’s
been here for hours now, Jabu is a good man and heis
good with the kids.”
I’m not about to tread that path with her, not again.Me:
“Sleep mom, I’ll go check on them.”
I exclaim and leave her to continue with her slumber,I
don’t mind Jabu being around my children. I can only
hope he doesn’t think something will brew between us,
Zain would turn in his grave… his best friend? Never
happening.

SABELO ZULU…

How come Bhekifa has never brought me here?

Heaven cannot be as beautiful as this place… The
Maslow in Sandton.
Me: “Yoh, yoh, yoh bafo. When I die, I want to comehere.
Heaven for what?”
I tell my brother as my eyes browse the place, richpeople are
living the life.
Bhekifa: “You’re insane bafo.”
He chuckles at my awestruck moment.
Me: “No seriously, this place is nca bafo. Ziyawamo.”
(It’s beautiful here.)
Bhekifa: “Let’s go inside.”
I follow him inside the auditorium and it’s just as
beautiful. Where is Julius Malema? I want him to fight for
my part of the land, I have chosen this one.
The place is packed with businessman, outstandingly
dressed in their noticeable expensive suits. The
businesswomen are no different, suddenlyI feel out of
place with the suit I wore at my brother’swedding years
ago. Bhekifa should have bought me something new. The
sleeves are small and the pantsare tight. I don’t complain
to him though, it’s his night. I will let him be, he will hear
it from me in the morning.

We settle down as an elegant black woman on the stage

addresses us, there are drinks on the table and a few
snacks, I’m sure to nibble on while we waitfor the full
meal. I didn’t eat at home, so I grab a small basket filled
with three pieces of baked bread
and chew away. Everything is appetizing, the peanuts
even taste better than the ones I normallybuy at Pick n’
Pay.
Me: “What do you think they made these peanutswith?
They are so delicious.”
Bhekifa's lips curl in disgust, his eyes trail my mouth.He
must like the way I chew or he wants what I’m eating.
Bhekifa: “At least swallow before you speak.”Mr.
Businessman! Nonsense…

Bhekifa: “Don’t you think you have had enough? Wipeyour

mouth people are staring.”
He’s starting, I knew he was going to act like this. I
can’t eat in peace in this free country.
Me: “Take me home if I embarrass you bafo, it’s notlike my
mother’s house has no food.”
Eish! One onion and half a tomato in the fridge to beexact.
Bhekifa has not been feeding us well, povertyis reigning in
that house.
Bhekifa: “Okay, I’ll request an Uber for you.”
I’m taken aback when he stands up, my mother’schild
is serious about this.
Me: “Fine, I will slow down hau. Why are you so soft?Sit
down bafo.”
Bhekifa: “Why didn’t mom come along? I thought shewas
the one to accompany me.”
Me: “Not with that dress she was wearing, I thoughtshe
was going to a funeral and not just a funeral, buther
enemy’s funeral. You should pay me for being here.”
I have come to realise that Bhekifa doesn’t like tohear a
word against his mother.

Boredom strikes as the night falls away, a few havewon

and my brother is nervously tapping his foot under the
table. His category is mentioned next, I see his face
crinkle with nerves. The black woman’sEnglish is too
posh, she speaks with her nose morethan she does with
her mouth, I can hardly hear a
thing with that twang. One day ekasi and she willcome
back speaking like Jacob Zuma.

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“Bhekifa Zulu.”
That’s all I hear, at least she pronounced my brother’s
name right… Wait! My brother! He won, Bhekifa won. By
the time I realise this, Bhekifa is halfway to the stage. How
can he leave me behind? I’m aproud Zulu man and of
course I will jump into a traditional Zulu dance. I hear
applause and a few whistles as I dance around whistling
myself.
Me: “Mageba.
Zulu ka Malandela ngokulandela izinkomo
zamadoda.
Zulu omnyama.
Ondlela zimhlophe.
Wena ka Phunga no Mageba.
Wena ka Mjokwane ka Ndaba.
Wena wenkayishana ka Menzi eyaphuza umlaza
ngameva.
Sthuli sika Ndaba. Sthuli
sika Nkombane.
Wena ka nogwaja omuhle ngomlenze.
Wena ka Mbambela Shoba.
Ndabezitha.” (Zulu clan praises.)

More applause by the time I finish my dance, I turn to my

brother on stage to see him accept the trophy,he pauses
for a few pictures and just as he is readyto get off stage, I
run there. People must know that we are the Zulus, we
are never defeated.
Bhekifa: “What are you doing?”
He questions with a chastising look, I will take overfrom
here. My brother seems to be shy… Embarrassing.

NELLY PAGE.
The family is watching the awards on TV, except formy
father. He retired earlier for the night. Bhekifa never
disappoints when it comes to work, I knew hewould take
it home like he always does. Ayanda hasbeen jumping in
excitement since her father was announced.
Me: “Okay, time for bed guys.”
I have to break this noise, my father is sleeping and I
wouldn’t want him to be woken up.
Ayanda: “Can we please watch some more?”
Bhekifa did well with Ayanda, she is starting to
accept the situation.
Me: “We agreed on thirty minutes, we’re going onforty
five and grandpa is sleeping. You’re makingnoise.”
Luvo: ‘We’ll be quiet mom please.”
Me: “Nope, I won’t fall for your innocence. Go brushyour
teeth and get in bed.”
They drop their heads and follow each other towardtheir
rooms.
Me: “I’ll come and check on you, you better besleeping
when I get there.”
I shout loud enough for them to hear. Mom:
“You’re doing great with the kids.”
Me: “I try, some days are hard and some days, they
make it easy.”
Mom: “Your father wants an apology from the Zulu
family.”
Of course he does, he’s old fashioned like that.Me:
“Is that why he’s grumpy lately?”
Mom: “I guess and you know it’s happening right?”
Me: “Yes, I hope there won’t be any war between the
families. I want peace ma, I’m tired of quarrelling.”
Mom: “Your father knows what he’s doing.”I
know he does, I trust him.

SABELO ZULU.
“Is that camera live?” I point to the camera on myleft,
the cameraman nods.
Bhekifa: “Bafo, don’t…”
I push him aside, you don’t get to be on TV every day.
Me: “Hello South Africa, my name is Sabelo Zulu. I
thought I would die without being on TV, my enemies are
eating their words. Mama!”
The place breaks with laughter, but I see the haughtyones
like my brother.
Bhefika: “Sabelo, let’s go.”
He says as I shout for my mother, this is my moment.Sabelo:
“MAMA I MADE IT, I MADE IT MAGRIZA. I
would like to thank my wife Rose, mabhebeza lookat me.
Your man is a celebrity, call all your friends
ngwana (baby) and tell them we are famous. My kids,your
old man will buy you Danone tomorrow to celebrate. I
would also like to thank my mother Mariam Zulu, I
thought witches were useless, but mymother has done it
for me. To my enemies, especially Zodwa, I won’t mention
the address for
safety reasons. Libambe lingashoni.” (Sleep withone
eye open.)
Bhekifa being the jealous person he is, drags me offstage.
He pulls me through the loud crowd, people love me. They
are taking pictures of me.

Bhekifa: “Did you have to embarrass me like that? And

how could you tell the world that your mother isa witch?
Are you insane Sabelo?”
This one is like Mariam, paranoid and annoying. He
pulls me down to a chair, he’s glaring at me.
Me: “This is how rivalry between siblings start, youdon’t
want us to shine Bhekifa. The whole of SouthAfrica now
knows that there is a Sabelo Zulu out there.”
Bhekifa: “With a mother who is a witch?”
What wrong did I say? Mariam is a witch, no one
crucified Harry Potter. Mariam is safe.
Me: “They don’t have proof, just word of mouth.”Bhekifa:
“Sabe –”
Me: “Stop complaining bafo hau, show me where the
kitchen is. I brought Tupperware, I have to pack meat for
our mother.”
Bhekifa: “They don’t do that here.”
Me: “How do you know? Have you tried asking themfor
takeaway?”
He sighs, visibly annoyed by me for whatever reason.
Bhekifa: “It’s an elegant function, they don’t dotakeaway.”
Sabelo: “Show me the kitchen and I will show youhow
we do it ekasi.” (In the hood.)
He gives me a long ugly stare. What does a manhave
to do to get meat around here?
Bhekifa: “I should have brought Cheryl instead.”
Cheryl or no Cheryl, I am not leaving this placewithout
my mother’s meat.

To be continued…
“TWENTY EIGHT”

BHEKIFA ZULU.

My mistake was thinking Sabelo tagging along wasa

good idea, it only proved to be the worst mistakeof my
life. I will have to clean up his mess, my reputation has
already been tarnished by the fight Ihad with Phakathi
and now this. My eyes keep moving to Sabelo sleeping
on the passenger seat, his loud snoring is getting to me.
I have to fight theurge to push him out of the moving
car, the idiot embarrassed me tonight.

Why is my mother sitting outside in the dark?Me:

“Sabelo wake up.”
He snores louder as I nudge his shoulder, I drive in and
park. My mother stands, her feet carry her to me.She opens
the door before I get a chance to wake Sabelo, her eyes are
wet. She’s been crying and not
only that, she is livid.
Me: “Mama.”
Mariam: “Wake that idiot up.”
Me: “It’s okay mama, I will help him to his room.”
I don’t think I like the look on her face, she is up to
something.
Mariam: “Sabelo will never step foot in my houseagain.”
Mariam grunts, I was afraid of this. My brother messed
up, it’s not his fault. He’s naturally stupid and can’t help
but be an idiot, my mother knows thiswell. Even as a kid,
he has always been trouble.
Me: “What do you mean?”
I step out of the car, Mariam’s comeback is a tongueclick.
I watch her as she strides to the lawn and grabs a
hosepipe, Oh no… Maybe my brother deserves this, but
my car doesn’t.
Me: “Mama, what are you doing?”
Mariam: “Your brother thinks I’m a witch? Today he
will know the kind of witch I am.”
It’s too late to stop her when she opens the passenger
door and sprays Sabelo, it’s not long tillhe jumps from
his sleep and falls on the concreteground as he tries to
run from the water.
Sabelo: “Haibo, bafo help me.”
He screams, seeing he can’t escape. Rolling on the floor, he
rubs his eyes to search for the source of hisproblem.

Sabelo: “Mama?”
You would think he got the shock of his life, he fallsback,
trying to get back up. My mother is wasting water if you
ask me.
Mariam: “Who is a witch wena Sabelo? You have the
nerve to announce to the whole world that I’m a witch.
Do you know what you have done?”
Sabelo: “They don’t have proof mama.”
He tells her, using me as a shield. My mother hasceased her
attacks.
Mariam: “You stupid boy, you announced it on
national TV.”
Sabelo: “I will protect you don’t worry, there is no
affidavit proving you’re really a witch. Don’t stress
magriza, I’ve got you, those people have no proof.”
I give up, my mother won’t live long with this
craziness.
Mariam: “Bhekifa talk to your brother please, hewants
to kill me.”
Sabelo: “This idiot son of yours mama failed to getyou
meat from the function, what will he possibly say to me?
I’m the only reliable son you have.”
Now he is brave enough to stand before his mother,she
looks defeated and drained.
Sabelo: “Wait here.”
Sabelo murmurs as he wobbles to the car, he dips half of
his body in the backseat and comes out withthe
Tupperware. I can’t begin to mention how he gotthe food
in there, embarrassment laughs at me at
the thought of his idiotic actions.
Sabelo: “Here.”
He pushes the Tupperware on my mother, she
frowns at it but flips the lid open still.
Sabelo: “That’s for you mama, go and feast. Don’t eat
too much, you won’t be able to wake up at 3am.You can
leave some for me, I will eat in the morning.Right now I
need something to drink my throat is dry.”
He’s got another thing coming if he thinks I will lethim
drink some more, Mariam is content with whatshe has, I
guess Sabelo knows her better.

Sabelo: “Sith’ aibo awuthi ngizwe lomthakathi uthin’

‘Ngiyafunga lomthakathi unes’bindi’
‘Izolo ngimthol’ ejaldini’
‘Ephethe nemithi’
‘Hamb’ enqunu ngathi’ uhamb’ ehlathini.’
(Let me hear what this witch is saying.)(I
swear this witch is brave.)
(I found her in my yard yesterday, with herbs.)
(Naked, like she is in a forest.)

He sings while dancing his way to the house, what

puzzles is how he is moving backwards, his eyes onmy
mother. He insists that she is a witch, Sabelo needs help. I
will have to talk to him when he is sober.
Sabelo: “Yesss…. Mariam, goodnight griza.” (Old lady)

-NELLY PAGE.

The basement is empty, my car is the only one parked

here. I check my surroundings while rushingto the car, I
had to do a last minute shopping and notonce did it cross
my mind not to park in the basement parking. How clever
Nelly…
I hear footsteps from behind and immediately turn to
inspect to find nothing, this alone is enough for me to pick
up my steps, hurrying to the car. The footsteps accelerate
too, I decide to run not knowingwho is after me and I’m
too afraid to turn back.
My heart is thudding hard against my ribcage, I am almost
certain it’s about to explode. Something tellsme to turn and
my assumptions are right, there is aman after me. The heels
make it hard for me to run faster than I already am.
A scream leaves my mouth as I am tackled to the ground,
I fall face down with a loud thud. My head spins due to
the collision, everything around comescrushing down
when I feel weight on my body, there is a man on top of
me. He is breathing down my neck, his hand instantly
snakes over my head to cover my mouth, depriving me a
chance to scream. Istruggle under him, my screams
fighting to escape through his hand.
“Shut up.”
He hisses through gritted teeth.
“This is going to be easier than I thought.”

His words paint a scene of what he wants to do to me, his

vacant hand pushes its way under my chestand falls on my
breast. This drives me absolutely insane, I have to fight
for my life. The man roughly turns me around while still
hovering over me, his yellow lustful eyes are scrutinising
me. I want to diebecause of the way he is staring at me.
Men can hide anything from you, anything, but lust. And I
havebeen let in the mind of this pervert rubbing his hips
against mine. He smells of alcohol and weed, he is way
bigger than me, that makes it hard for me to fight him.

“Nelly, right?”
He knows me?
“You are exactly as they described you, actually even
better.”
His semi-yellow teeth flash in my face as he grins
like a Cheshire cat, he dips his nose in the curve ofmy
neck and takes a long mouthful of air. Tears streak
down my face, fear grips my heart.
“You smell good too.”
Lord help me, anything but this please. Muffled screams
resound from my voice, it’s inaudible and not ready to
give a hand. I will not go down without afight, his tongue
slides between the seams of his lips and he runs it down
my cheek. My stomach churns at the feel of his slimy
tongue on my skin, death is better than this. It has to be.
‘Please let me go.’ I’m not able to voice out as thisman
has bound my speech, my tears speak for me.

“Hey! What are you doing there?”

Someone shouts, a male voice, a wave of reliefconsumes my
whole being.
“See you next time Mazulu.” The creepy man
exclaims.
My body regains its weight when my attacker jumps
from me, he takes off running the opposite direction,away
from the two men who are rushing to my rescue. One of
them runs after the aggressor, while the other comes to
my aid. I can’t move, shock has kept me prisoner. So I
stay on the ground, crying myeyes out. I can feel every
inch of my body trembling…Every part of me is
traumatized, numb to my deepestcore.
“Hey are you okay?”
It’s a black man, his eyes are soft. He helps set meto a
sitting position, I would stand if fear was not wrapped
around my wobbly knees. The man kneelsbefore me, he
tilts his head to inspect my eyes.
“Did he hurt you? Did he…”
He pauses, unsure how to say rape. Seeing his
struggle, I shake my head.
Me: “Som – someone sent him. He – he called meby… my
name.”
I’m a stammering mess, tears have taken over, rendering
me weak and fragile. I am fragile, I am awoman in South
Africa.
“Do you need me to call someone?”
I think of my father, but I don’t want to worry him.Me:
“I’m okay.”
I lie. How on earth am I going to get home?
“I can drive behind you to make sure you get home safe,
besides, I think you are in no state to be driving.You might
get yourself killed.”
Who is this man? I can’t trust him, not after what just
happened.
Me: “I will manage thanks.”
“Please, I insist. My name is Nkateko Mathebula ifyou’re
worried about the stranger tag.”
He reaches out his hand for a handshake, reluctantlyI take
it and claim my hand back before I could feel the warmth
of his hand.
Me: “Nelly.”
I give away my identity as he regards me with an
expectant gaze.
Nkateko: “Nelly, let me help you please. I won’t sleep
peacefully wondering if you got home safe.”
I let his words sink in and think about the man who
attacked me, the last words he said to me echo in my
head. This compels me to agree to Nkateko’s suggestion.
He won’t be in my car, so I’m safe. He helps me to the
car and waits for me until I buckle up. As I drive out of
the parking lot, I check the rear-view to see him
cautiously driving behind me.

-BHEKIFA ZULU.

For the first time in a while I feel at peace and thereis

something to look forward to. I don’t know anything
about life, but Cheryl makes it worth living.
Today is our third official date and I have had fun in all
three of them, I am looking forward to many more.
Me: “Shall we go? It’s getting late.”
She nods at my question, I signal for the waiter to come so I
settle the bill. A few minutes later we aregood to go.
Cheryl: “Thank you for tonight, I had a great time.”
She sends her gratitude as we tread to the car handin
hand, I trap her against the car. Her eyes rise to lock
with mine.
Me: “I know how you can thank me.”
I bend down, my lips against her cheek, brushing it lightly.
It’s the first touch that has her trembling in my arms. My
hands glide down to her waist to pull her close to me so
our bodies are flush together, leaving no space between
us. My lips trace inches of her skin, moving toward her
mouth. A yearning to feel her lips swallows me, my lips
brush against hers.Barely a touch…

Cheryl: “Bhek…”
Her words hang and the rest are lost against her mouth, I
kiss her mildly, cautiously. My arms ring around her,
gathering her against me. A strong pulljolts me out of the
blissful moment.
The second I turn, a hand collides with my cheek.
The slap is from a small hand, it hardly stings. But anger
does not deny me the right to retaliate, the thought of
Cheryl witnessing my dark side bothers me. This has me
restraining myself, my jaw clenchesin anger. How dare
Buhle think she has the right to slap me? Who does she
think she is?

Me: “What is your problem?”

I growl, showing her how angry I am. Buhle’s arms fold
across her chest, I can’t stand the gum she is chewing
with no remorse. It’s louder than the tongueclick she gives
me.
Buhle: “Who is this?”
Like she has the right to ask me that. Me:
“I asked you a question first Buhle.”
Buhle: “Forget that Bhekifa, I want to know who thisslut is.”
I hear Cheryl huff beside me, she has a comebackand I
pray she withholds it. Buhle is not worth the fight.
Me: “Let’s go Cheryl.”
I move to open the door for her, Buhle jumps to slam it
closed, making my patience run thin. I could do theworst
and slap that gum out of her mouth.
Buhle: “Have you forgotten about your son Bhekifa? Is
she my replacement?”
Buhle is as loud as clanging cymbals.
Me: “What replacement? You were never an option
Buhle, did you really think I was serious about you?
Dammit, I was married.”
Buhle: “You said you would take care of me and ourson,
I have…”
Me: “Our son yes, I never said I will maintain your
lifestyle while you lazy around, spending money youdid not
work for.”
Buhle’s eyes coldly draw Cheryl’s frame, she clicks her
tongue again and graces us with her famous eyeroll.
Buhle: “I won’t let you move on with anyone elseBhekifa,
not even the likes of this slut.”
Cheryl: “That’s it, call me a slut again.”
Cheryl snaps, entering Buhle’s personal space. I can’t
let her stoop to Buhle’s level, my arms circleher waist as
I pull her back.
Me: “No.”
Cheryl pushes herself from me, for a brief moment she
glares at Buhle and turns to enter the car. I lovehow
disciplined she is becoming, the old Cheryl would have
said a mouthfull.

Buhle: “Who is that woman Bhekifa? What about me?What

about our son?”
Me: “Are you deaf or what Buhle? I told you I will takecare
of my son, however, I have nothing to do with you.”
Buhle: “But…”
Me: “What are you doing here anyway? Are you
following me?”
Her eyes fall, hiding the guilt building up behind them.
Me: “Consider this your last warning, I don’t want you
anywhere near me or that woman in there. You are sick in
the head, you need help.”
Buhle: “But I love you, please give me a second chance.
How come that woman gets to have you while you’re still
married? What is so special abouther?”
Her tears do not move me, how did I get myselfinvolved with
this irrational woman?
Buhle: “I can be your girlfriend too, I don’t mind sharing.
Please Bhekifa, don’t leave me out please.”
Buhle pleads with tears in her eyes, she truly is sickif she
thinks I will entertain her craziness.
Me: “Go home Buhle.”
These are my last words, I have nothing more to sayto her.
I rush to the car and instantly drive off. Thereis no telling
what Buhle will do in her crazy state, Cheryl has not said
a word since we left the restaurant. It is not like her to be
mute, Buhle is going to ruin things for me.
cm®
To be continued©
“TWENTY NINE”

CHERYL ZIKHALI.

His jaw tightens as his hands hook the steeringwheel,

his anger is always at the door step.
Something I have noticed lately, it hasn’t been
directed towards me yet and I have my fingers
crossed that he never will.
Me: “What was that about?”
Bhekifa goes quiet on me and I glance at him waitingfor a
reaction, but nothing surfaces. I’m kidding myself
thinking he will actually answer.
“Tell me about that woman, Bhekifa?”
The side eye.
Bhekifa: “She’s nobody.”
I know what this means, I feel myself get emotionalas a
wave of jealousy washes over me.
Me: “Did you sleep with her?”
The look again… Gosh, sometimes I hate how he canbe so
mysterious. I’m struggling to read his emotions and it
doesn’t sit well with me. I’m waiting for him to provide me
with an answer, but he doesn’tand he’s not about to.
I guess his silence answers my question. Bhekifanotices how
my mood has dropped.
Bhekifa: “Why are you upset?”
Because I choose this over shedding tears for a manI have
been dating for months.
Me: “You slept with her Bhekifa and you’re askingme
shit.”
My emotions get the best of me and I shout at him, he
parks the car on the side of the road, turns to lookat me
with a scowl on his face. Maybe it’s not my right to yell at
him, then again I will not be played bya man. I am not one
to share.
Bhekifa: “Talk to me like that again.”
He demands with a threatening tone that has me
gulping.
I don’t think I like the angry Bhekifa.
Me: “Is this the type of a person you really are? Didyou
deceive me by giving me a different impressionof you?”
Bhekifa:”What are you talking about?”
Me: “You have a child with that woman back there, as far
as I know, you separated with your wife months ago.
Where does this one come from? Wereyou two timing your
wife?”

Bhekifa: “You see why I say you jump into conclusions

without thinking, that girl means nothingto me.”
He clenches a fist as he groans in annoyance.
Bhekifa: “Buhle was a fling yes…”
My eyes and I fight the tears that want to gush out
screaming for attention. I will not weep over this man and
I will not be played like an idiot. There’s onething I have
noticed about him since this relationshipbegan, Bhekifa
can’t lie to me. It’s either he doesn’t
know how to or he is trying to impress me.
Bhekifa: “You and I were not together that time, I… Iwas…”
He is mumbling… mumbling is not good.
Bhekifa: “I was married when Buhle came along, itwas
stupid of me and not a day passes without meregretting
it.”

Do men regret ever cheating? Jeer! Bhekifa had anaffair

with a woman and got her pregnant. Hell I’mnot perfect,
I had a crush on a married man, but toactually date one
ended in my thoughts.
Me: “What does she want now?”
He seems shocked by my question and that I’m not
fighting him anymore.
Bhekifa: “She’s being a nuisance, but I’ll take care ofit,
she won’t bother us again.”
Don’t trust anyone who says such things, taking careof
someone or something in my world means getting rid of
them, completely. Bhekifa takes my
hands into his and plants kisses on them, I’m
fighting the urge to smile.
Me: “Do I have to worry about you cheating on me?”
I know what I said, I need to confirm so I know whento
walk away.
Bhekifa: “I was stupid back then, maybe I wasn’t happy
in my marriage, maybe I was bored or lookingfor a way
out. I don’t know… I can’t explain my affairwith Buhle,
she came out of nowhere and brought something
different in my life. Somehow, she knew me more than
she should have and I found that impressive.”
That does not make sense. Bhekifa:
“Shall we go to my house?”
Me: “What for? Take me to my mother’s house.”Me:
“We need to talk Cheryl.”
I don’t think so, it’s his excuse for cheating that hasput
me off. He cheats when he feels bored in the
relationship? He was impressed by Buhle’s familiarity
of him? What does that even mean?
Bhekifa: “Cheryl please…”
Me: “Just drive me home, it’s late and I’m tired.”
Perhaps I need to sleep on this, my mind is
entertaining a lot of things at the same time.
Bhekifa gives up, he starts the car and we’re off.

-NELLY PAGE.

Nkateko followed me all the way to my father’s house,

the house lights are still on. My parents areprobably
waiting for me to get home, those two likeworrying
unnecessarily.
I don’t get out of the car when I pull up at the gate. Ican
see Nkateko through the side mirror getting outof the car,
he marches to the driver's side. The window is already
drawn, he smiles. I’m still too shaken to return the smile.
Me: “This is it.”
I tell him with gratitude in my heart.
Nkateko: “Drive in, I’ll only be at peace after you aresafe
inside.”
It’s good to know there are still good people out
there.
Me: “Uh! Okay, thank you.”
He’s staring, I have no idea why. Lord, don’t let himask
for my numbers, lately people have a ‘you scratch my
back, I scratch yours’ mentality.
Nkateko: “No problem, you need to keep an eye out.This
world is not a safe place.”
Tell me something I don’t know.
Me: “I will, goodnight.”
Nkateko: “Night.”
He flashes a quick smile as I ask him to get the gatefor me.
Nkateko: “From superman to gateman huh?”
His statement tickles, it has me giggling. I make it in,wave
to him and rush into the house as he drives away.
Entering the house through the kitchen, I find Victordrinking
milk from the bottle.
Me: “Hey!”
He flinches at the sound of my voice, the little frightcauses
him to drop the bottle, spilling the milk all over the floor.
Victor: “Mom… not fair.”
He whines, grimacing at me.
Me: “You’re lucky it wasn’t grandma who walked in,
what did I tell you about drinking from the container?”
Victor: “I was thirsty.”
Me: “Too thirsty to grab a cup?”
He shrugs his shoulders as if dismissing my
interrogation.
Me: ‘Get a mop and clean that up.”
He mumbles words I can’t make out as he walks outof the
kitchen.
I can hear my parents talking in the living room, I make
my way there. My mother is positioned next tomy father…
What in God’s name is he whispering to her? Do these
people know their time passed with Shaka Zulu?
Me: “Greetings.”
At least they notice me, my mother smiles. I’m not sure I
like the way my father is scrutinising me underhis gaze, if
he zooms his lenses any closer, he will notice I’m shaken.
Dad: “Good thing you’re home, come sit.”
Come sit? I don’t want to impose, I would rather bein
my room, thank you.
Me: “I’m tired, I want to go to bed.”
Mom: “Sit Nelly, your father has something to say.”
Okay… This sounds urgent, judging by the looks ontheir
faces, I find my way to a single seater and waiton my
father’s words.
Dad: “How are you?”
After all this while, I still don’t have an answer to that
question. My life is a mess, Buhle is sitting on my neck. My
family has been shred in two and I have noidea how I’m
going to move on from here… Oh and I was attacked today.
My mind has written down the answer, but my mouth
refuses to cooperate and deliver the words.

Dad: “Your in laws are coming over on Saturday.”

I see we’re dropping bombs tonight, my mother had
mentioned it, I didn’t think it would be this soon. If
Thokozani were here, he would dismiss this.
Dad: “The Zulu family owes you an apology, their son
wronged you.”
I get that and there is nothing I will say that will
change my father’s mind, but I feel that it’s not
necessary.
Mom: “So you know what you have to do?”
Dress up like the wife I am, cook and serve Bhekifaas if
nothing ever happened between us... Life.
Me: “I know ma, I don’t want to see him though.”
Dad: “You don’t have a choice Nelly, don’t get it twisted,
this is not a reunion. I will never let you getback with
Bhekifa again.”
I trust him when it comes to this and this father ofmine is a
promise keeper.
Mom: “The Zulus will want to see their children, I have
informed the kids about it. Victor is the only one who
seems to have a problem, he said he is notready to see
his father.”
I’m worried about Victor, his anger has lasted for fartoo
long. He needs to forgive Bhekifa.
Me: “I will talk to him ma.”
My father stares dismayingly, he is reading me andlike I
said, he can see right through me. Perhaps I should tell
them what happened at the mall, but knowing my
father, he will give me a curfew. His house, his rules.
Dad: “You don’t look okay. Did something happen?”What
did I say?
His penetrating gaze forces me to shift uncomfortably in
the chair, I clear my blocked throatas I prepare to answer
his question.
Me: “I’m fine baba, it’s been a long day.”
He nods, not removing his eyes from me.
Dad: “Mmmmh.”
That hum means he will get to the bottom of this, one way
or the other, something tells me, he has eyes and ears
everywhere. Or I’m exaggerating things, I don’t know. My
father is the most secretiveperson I know.
Dad: “Go to bed, we will talk when you have rested.”
He means when I’m ready to tell him what the problem
is, I gather myself and move to my room. Ineed a bath,
to wash off that pervert’s scent. Everyfibre in my body
jumps as thoughts of earlier floodmy head, I’m going to
need sleeping pills because Idoubt I will sleep a wink
tonight.

-SABELO ZULU.
Two days later…

The uncles are here, in my mother’s house. There is an

argument going on in the living room between them and
my mother, apparently Nelly’s father wantsan apology
from us for treating his daughter like thetrash she is and
my mother will have none of it. She made it clear that she
does not want Nelly anywhere near her precious son,
Bhekifa.

The Zulu uncles were tired of being sent back and forth,
from the time Bhekifa and Nelly went their separate ways.
The first meeting was cancelled by Bhekifa himself, he gave
no reason, however Mariamsupported him.
Mariam was not informed about the meeting thatwill
take place on Saturday, you should have seenhow
upset she was when the uncles told her the reason for
their sudden visit.
My brother is different lately, he is glowing like a
pregnant woman. I don’t know how long it has been
since he separated from his wife, his heart has healed. He
smiles and laughs more than he used to and I want to use
this chance to talk to him about the money he sends home.
I need a raise, he offeredto pay for my children’s tuition
until grade 12. We aresorted in that department.

“How do I look?”
I don’t pay attention to Rose’s question, but my eyestrail the
skimpy outfit she is wearing. She has this stupid smile on
her face, like she is content with showing off her body.
Me: “Where did you say this job is?”
You heard me, my wife found herself a job. She saysshe
would rather work than slave for my mother. I’mnot
happy about this though, we were doing fine withBhekifa’s
money. With Rose in the house, it’s easier to keep an eye
on her. I’m afraid she will go out thereand meet men who
are better than me, men who make an honest living.
Rose: “I told you there’s a shoe store in Rosebank,
they needed a cashier. I applied and was hired on thespot.”
Me: “Who hired you Rose? Don’t tell me an Indian
man, I doubt you will be making sufficient money
there.”
Rose: “Mr Kgasi is very much black and successful,the
shop belongs to him actually.”
That’s it.
Me: “You’re not taking that job.”
She frowns at me, I watch her as she drags her size 6 feet
toward the bed and throws herself on it. Rose knows once
I make up my mind it takes a miracle forme to change it.
Rose: “Sabelo don’t do this, we need the money.”Well I
need my dignity.
Me: “Yes we do and I will make the money while youmake
babies.”
Rose: “You don’t want any more babies.”
Me: “It doesn’t matter, I am not letting you work
Rose.”
Rose: “You’re not being fair Sabelo.”
Me: “What is this Rose, huh? Do you want to depriveme a
chance to be a provider? You want to trampleon my
ego?”
Rose: “What do you want me to do then? We can’trely
on your brother forever, your mother had dismissed
the idea of killing him and Nelly. We would be living a
good life right now Sabelo.”
Me: “Why do you worry about things that do not
concern you? You have kids Rose, stay home andtake
care of my children. I will worry about the money.”
I can’t afford to lose my wife, she is the only thing I have
that makes sense. Rose jolts to her feet, looksat me up and
down and bolts out of the bedroom. I am not in the mood
to argue with her, I will deal withher later, now I need to
talk to my brother. Money has to be made. cm®
To be continued©
“THIRTY”

“BHEKIFA ZULU”

My mother is calling me for the hundredth time, I’m

avoiding her calls. I woke up to her call around 5am, on a
Saturday of all days. When does that woman sleep? She
wants me to put a stop to the meeting happening today, I
would do it if I had the power. Myuncles are stubborn,
they do as they please. They are elders, defying them
would be a wrong move. I already made them jump to my
beat more than once.
Nelly’s father wants an apology for what I did to his
daughter, I would protest if I didn’t see anything wrong
with my actions. I hurt my wife, she does notdeserve what
I have put her through. We would stillbe together if it
were not for my selfishness.

It takes me about an hour to complete my Saturday

mundane, and prepare for the meeting. Nerves have
me by my course hair, I need to relax. I have no cluehow
today will go, hopefully the divorce will not be brought
forth. It is a topic I would rather avoid by allmeans.
I grunt at the sound of my phone ringing, it has rang
plenty of times that the ringtone is starting to piss me off.
It could be that or the person calling. Ohh!
It’s Sabelo calling, I will speak to him when I get tomy
mother’s house.

-NELLY PAGE.

“Nelly hurry up with that stew, they are going to behere

soon.”
My mother is nervous for a strange reason, you would
think the Zulus are coming here for her. Shewoke me up
too early just so we can start cookingfor the guests.
Me: “I still think we should have ordered the KFCbucket,
gravy and rolls.”
She is standing across the sink from me and thatblack
stare she is giving me makes me uncomfortable. This
lady has no idea that I am serious.
Mom: “We can’t feed our guests junk food.”
Me: “Why does this have to be a big deal ma? Thingswere
going okay, Bhekifa is hands on with the kids and for the
first time in a long time we are not at warwith each
other.”
Mom: “It might be, but also remember what Bhekifadid to
you can’t be ignored.”
Unfortunately, the food is ready. What I need to donow
is freshen up.
Me: “I’m going to take a bath.”
My mother frowns, my remark seems to have
caused confusion.
Mom: “You haven’t bathed yet?”I
see a lecture brewing.
Mom: “Is this what you have been doing at your house?
That is careless, a woman should not be in
the kitchen before bathing.”

On what testament is this written? My phone saves me

from disputing, my mother disapprovingly shakes her
head as I grab the ringing phone from thekitchen counter.
I scan the screen to see the caller ID and my mood drops
instantly. Buhle will never give me a moment’s peace, The
CCMA issue has notbeen solved, my boss is not happy
with me, the woman looks at me like I want to take away
her company.
Me: “I have to take this ma.”
I exclaim, walking out of the kitchen to my bedroom.
Ignoring Buhle would not be such a good idea, I am at
her mercy.

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Me: “Yes.”
I give her the iciest attitude I can gather, we’re notfriends
and I don’t owe her a smile.
Buhle: “This proves that people who owe you have a
bitchy attitude.”
I need to sit down for this, her insolence gives me hot
flashes. I can’t think of anything, but making herpay for
everything she has done to me.
Me: “I don’t owe you anything.”
A mocking cackle shoots through the phone, makingme
withdraw my ear from the mobile.
Buhle: “Of course you owe me, Bhekifa belongs tome.”
I’m insane to entertain a crazy person like Buhle.
Me: “Bhekifa does not love you, Buhle. He won’tlisten
to me because of that.”
I know Bhekifa, if he were in love with her, he wouldbe
with her.
Buhle: “Is that what he told you?”
Oh come on!!!
Me: “I have known that man my whole life. Trust me,if he
loved you, you would not be chasing him like this.”
Buhle: “Don’t play games with me, Nelly. I want my
father’s child with me, I have always known you’vebeen
jealous of me. That’s why you prefer to sharehim with
another woman.”
There is arrogance in her tone, as if I am indebted toher
like she mentioned. And what on earth does she mean I
would rather share him with another woman?
Me: “Excuse me?”
Buhle: “Oh cut the crap, I saw Bhekifa with anotherwoman.
In fact he has been seeing her quite a lot lately, it’s all he
ever does.”
Is this woman stalking Bhekifa?
Me: “How do you know all this?”
If my assumptions are true, then Buhle is dangerous.She is
capable of anything, this is the part where I watch my back.

Buhle: “That’s for me to worry about, you do what I

asked of you. Bring me, my Bhekifa. I want my son’sfather
Nelly.”
Me: “Bhekifa has never been yours, you need help.”
Buhle: “Are you calling me crazy?”
She yells over the phone and yes… she sounds like acrazy
person. I can’t deal with this, I will have to tellBhekifa
about it. He has to handle his own mess.
Me: “I have to go, I have work to do.”
Buhle: “Yes, the gathering. Say, how about you take
pictures of Bhekifa for me? I haven’t seen my man up
close in a while. I miss that face of his.”
How the hell does she know about the meeting?
Me: “Listen to me, Buhle. Stay away from me, or I willgo to
the police.”
I’m terrified for my children now, Buhle seems to be
watching all of us. What have you done Bhekifa? I hear
confidence in the way Buhle laughs, she has something
up her sleeve.
Buhle: “I’m not going anywhere sister-wife.”
She hangs up before I could tell her that I have nothing to
do with Bhekifa anymore, though I have a feeling it would
be a waste of time. People like Buhle
refuse to see reason, even if you lain the truth beforethem.
They would call it a lie, I know because I workwith most of
them. Bhekifa will have to hear about this, I can’t carry
such a heavy burden. To avoid talking to her in future, I will
need to resign and get anew job.

-SABELO ZULU.

We are all gathered in the living room at the Magwaza

residence, I am not going to lie. I’m here for the alcohol.
Whether Bhekifa apologises or not, Ido not care.
However, to get on his good books I have to play my part.
Be the supportive brother he wants me to be, we’re
talking money here.
Me: “Don’t worry bafo, I’ve got you. You don’t have tosay
much, let me do the talking.”
I inform my brother seated beside me, looking
nervous as hell. My uncles are confidently drinking like this
is their mother’s house, Nelly’s father is a brave lad. He
brought one representative, that’s fouragainst two. Man, we
are going to fry these people alive.
Bhekifa: “No bafo, I don’t want you to say anythingtoday.
The uncles will speak.”
My brother whispers back, I did say he is nervous.Look
at him sweating like he’s about to take a liedetector
test.
Me: “What will these old men say? They don’t know
anything about city life, look at Nelly’s father carefully.”
My eyes point toward the old with an intimidating face, I
thank my ancestors Thokozani is not here. I’mpretty sure
they are deadly together.
Me: “Your father in-law looks like Mofokeng from Emzini
Wezinsizwa (TV drama.) The type that likesmoney, I bet
you, he sees the lotto when he looks atyou. Don’t worry
bafo, I will deal with him.”
Bhekifa disagrees by shaking his head, his stupid act
gets us attention from Nelly’s father.
Magwaza: “Is there something you would like to
share?”
The old man says, I don’t understand God honestly.
Shouldn’t old people have missing teeth or something?
This one reminds me of Mariam, they refuse to age. By
fire by force...Hey… their time is near, God must just do
the needful and take his people. We are tired of seeing
their old wrinkled faces.
Me: “No, no baba. We were just saying how beautifulyour
house is, you built shame taima, you built.” (Your house
is beautiful old man.)
Lessons on how to please your in laws, ask SabeloZulu. A
smile is all it takes and they will give you anextra piece of
chicken, a drumstick to be exact.

Magwaza: “I am not your old man.”

You see? They are stubborn when it comes to
ageing, everyone wants to be ageless lately.
Unfortunately, only a few of us are blessed.
Magwaza: “Let us begin.”
The three magic words.
“Before we begin, I would like everyone to keep the
relationship that we have, in mind.”
This one who just spoke is my father’s elder brother,he is
the one who makes final decisions in the family.Talk about
Hitler, his hard face doesn’t lie as well. He is big on
tradition and wants my brother and Nelly tofix their
marriage. I know how to handle him.
Me: “Sho sho malumez, we hear you.” (Uncle.)
He is also famous for the deadly stare he is giving me, I
have a list of old people I need dead. My fatherwas the
first and the devil ticked it and took him.
Magwaza: “With that being said, we should take thistime
to discuss the lobola that was paid. My daughter is still
young, after all this is over, she willfind someone and
want to get to married. I don’t want…”
And…the old man has opened a can of worms,
Bhekifa sits up from his seat. Eyes wide with shockand
what I would call possessiveness.

Bhekifa: “Wait a minute, no one said anything about

Nelly getting married.”
Magwaza: ‘Haibo wenja (bastard). Do you think my
child will remain single forever?”
Bhekifa: “Nelly is my wife baba, I paid lobola for her.”Idiot.
Magwaza: “So what? You two have decided to goyour
separate ways.”
Bhekifa: “I didn’t decide on anything, Nelly made the
decision by herself. She saw it best to pack up and leave our
matrimonial home, whereas we could havegotten help from
a professional or something.”
Bhekifa, Bhekifa… You sound like an idiot my brother.How
do I tell him this?
Magwaza: “Don’t tell me that nonsense boy, you
made the decision first by laying your hands on mychild.”
Bhekifa: “Couples fight baba, you can’t tell me, youand
ma have…”
Me: “Wrong button brother, (un)press it now.”
He doesn’t acknowledge me, I’m trying to help. Nelly’s
father looks ready to bite, I don’t know withwhich teeth.
Those don’t look strong at all, they remind me of my
mother’s crooked teeth. You havegot to love old age…
God, I see you, I...see...you.

Magwaza: “Don’t you dare bring my wife into this,you

are nothing, but a coward Bhekifa.”
Hehehe! Bring it on grandpa… I’m loving this, Ithought
I was going to be bored.
Uncle: “Can we all calm down please?”
The older uncle interrupts the bull fight, we shouldhave
dropped him off at a tavern with his peers.
Bhekifa is fuming beside me, I can clearly hear everybreath
he inhales and exhales. Shame, this is what
love does to people. It’s a pandemic this thing, wewere
fooled. Corona has nothing on love, we are dead men
walking.
Bhekifa: “Baba”
My brother breathes…
Bhekifa: “Tradition says Nelly is my wife, you of all
people should know this. She is no longer a Magwaza,
but a Zulu, my wife. I can’t claim the lobola back, it is
not done.”
Well, they can pay us every cent we gave them.
Uncle: “Okay, that’s enough Bhekifa.”
Why is this uncle here? He is starting to get on my
nerves.
Uncle: “Let’s talk about the main reason we have gathered
here, we will tackle the marriage issue afterthis one.”
Nelly’s father is also breathing fire, I’m sure that single
couch he is seated on is feeling the heat. Heshifts a little
to adjust comfortably, his angry eyesare on my brother.
Why can’t people die from icy
glares? I would have one problem down.
Magwaza: “Fine, my brother and I have spoken andwe
want three cows as payment for the damage done to our
child.”
The second coming is near, repent people. What didthis
father just say?

NELLY PAGE.

I had complained about my mother being nervous, but it’s

my turn now. Part of me is terrified that Bhekifa’s uncles
will want me to go back to him andmy father will agree.
It’s only a crazy thought, my father will protect me from
any harm. I trust him withmy life.
My mother said to stay in the bedroom, she will callme
when it’s time to dish up. Argh, I am not lookingforward
to it. I can hear loud voices from here, I knew it wasn’t
going to be a peaceful meeting. TwoZulu families who are
at war, under one roof is not
good. I pray to God everything goes smooth.

cm®
To be continued©
“THIRTY ONE”

CHERYL ZIKHALI.

Watching Jabu with my kids puts an unexpected smile on

my face, the way he is with them reminds me of Zain. They
are kind of similar in a way. I appreciate Jabu’s efforts to
bond with Earth and Sia, the sacrifices he has made for
them. However the hints he sends off are way too much for
me to grasp,there are times I feel suffocated by his
presence.
Gosh, I didn’t mean to stare, not the way he just caught
me smiling at him with the kids. He smilesback and
winks, motioning that he got the wrongmessage.
“Why don’t you guys go ask grandma for juice?” Jabu
says. Probably a way to get us alone, I’m readyto wear a
sign around my neck that says “I’m not interested.”
Earth: “Can we, mom?”
Me: “The only thing you will be putting in your mouthis an
apple, grab one each on your way to your room.”
Grumbles fill the air as their tiny feet lead them out of the
living room, my eyes follow them until they are out of
sight. I turn back to Jabu to findhim seated on the carpet
with a smile playing on hisface. What kind of bubble does
this man have? I have been hard at work, trying to burst
it, but he comes back with it stronger than before.

Me: “Don’t give me that smile.”

Lord, it widens.
Jabu: “What smile?”
Me: “Why are you forever here Jabu?”
I won’t be letting him down easily anymore, I’m tired.Men
are trouble honestly, this gender has that annoying thing
that twists every nerve in you.
Jabu: “You know what I want from you.”
Me: “I’m in love with Bhekifa.”
I haven’t told the poor guy yet and here I am
confessing to my late husband’s best friend. Shame!His
face falls after his eyes flash with hurt, this manknew from
day one how I felt about him. Jabu gets up from the
floor… okaaay… he is sitting too close and it’s awkward,
on my part.
Jabu: “What about me? I’m in love with you.”
Did this man not hear what I said?
Me: “Jabu don’t do this, you will only hurt yourself.”
Jabu: “And you? You’re in love with a man who
belongs to…”

Not again!
Me: “I think it will be for the best if we stopdiscussing
Bhekifa.”
Jabu: “Why won’t you see him for the man he is?
Only I can love you right Cheryl, give me a chance
please.”
Why is he moving in me on me? I should be pushinghim
away, but I’m not. His lips touch mine.
Jabu: “I have a need for you, Mangwane. Won’t youlet
me in?”
Show me a woman who doesn’t tremble when a mancalls
her by her clan names and I will dub them crazy.Why does
Jabu have to do this to me? I’m a woman for heaven’s
sake, we have weak spots and this gender knows just
where to press to get us sweatingin all the wrong places. I
want to pull back when his soft lips brush against mine…
did I say soft? The devil is probably preparing a place for
me in hell, a king size bed. I will need it, considering I will
be tossing and turning, thinking about the man I am
betraying. Bhekifa will… Wait! Bhekifa…
His name alone jolts me back before Jabu plungeshis
tongue in my mouth.

Use your feet Cheryl and go outside to cool off, thisman

is using some kind of magic on you. I could never allow
Jabu near me, not like that. What in Romeo and Juliet’s
names was I thinking? I ignoreJabu calling out to me, if
he knows what’s good for
him, he will not come after me.

-NKATEKO MATHEBULA.

Nelly Page Zulu, married to businessman, BhekifaZulu.

Together they have four kids and live in thenorth of
Johannesburg.

Google does not know everything like it lets us think,this is

all it has on Nelly. I had to find out who she is after saving
her from that sick bastard who attackedher at the mall.
I’m no prince charming, but I have this thing in me to
save damsels in distress. It musthave everything to do with
not being able to save mywife.

It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that Nelly is going

through the most, her sad eyes are laid out forthe whole
world to see and that’s when I knew she needs saving.
Googling her was not planned, I’m a
curious cat that’s all. I need to know who my next project
is. I have a feeling the man at the parking lotwill come
back, haunting him down is going to be fun.

-NELLY PAGE.

MY mother comes rushing into my room, someonetell this

woman to relax. She won’t make it throughthe night if she
allows anxiety to take control of her.
Me: “What’s going on?”
I have been impatiently pacing up and down in this room,
worried about the commotion in the lounge. Sabelo’s
voice is the loudest, I don’t understand whyhe is here. The
man is a joke, a whole clown.
The only thing he takes seriously is his trophy wife Rose,
come to think of it, she is the only thing he is proud of
attaining in his miserable life. To think women like Rose
exist in this day and age, naivety atits best.
What sane woman lets a man tie her down in 2021?If
Sabelo dies, Rose will have to start everything from
scratch because her husband has nothing to his name.

Mom: “There is an argument regarding your

separation with Bhekifa.”
Me: “When has there never been one?”I
expected this, really.
Mom: “Your father told him that you will need to move
on one day, but your husband is disputing it.”
Should he still be called that? Bhekifa does notdeserve
the husband title.
Me: “I know ma, Bhekifa told me himself before we
separated. He will never let me be happy.”
Her eyes widen as if the news is new to her, have Inot
mentioned this to her before?
Mom: “Let’s hope your father will be able to convincehim to
back off.”
Bhekifa Zulu does not back off, a restraining order and
time spent in jail could not keep him away fromme.
Me: “Yeah.”
I brush the topic off, his possessiveness is the last thing I
want to think about right now. My mother follows me as I
tread to sit on the bed, she suddenlylooks out of it. I hate it
when she stresses.
Me: “What is the noise about?”
Those men sound like monkeys fighting over a banana,
Sabelo is the leader. My mother shakes herhead in defeat,
her brows furrow in annoyance.
Mom: “Your brother in law is crazy.”
I’m glad she thinks so because he is.
Me: “Do I want to know what he’s up to?”
Mom: “Why do you think I’m here? I have heard enough of
his craziness, I’ll sit with you until they aredone.”
Great, I need the company.
-SABELO ZULU.

People don’t come with tags describing the type of a

person they are, like this one here… Nelly’s father… His
tag would be written CRAZY!!! In bold letters.
Me: “Three cows taima?” (Oldman)
Why is everyone looking at me? It’s too much.
Magwaza: “Is there a problem?”
Me: “A big one, Haibo, these are not lobola negotiations.
You should have told us if you wantedmeat, I know a lot of
cheap butcheries who can giveyou a year’s supply, very
cheap.”
Bhekifa: “Bafo, I told you not to say anything.”
Bafo my foot, who will feed me when he goes broke?Me: “I
say we call Mam Angie, someone needs to
step in. You think we have cows grazing in a kraal
somewhere?”
I have made a wise decision and that is to avoid my brother,
he is stupid at the end of the day. That’s whythey want him to
pay with all the cows in the world.
Uncle: “Sabelo, let him finish.”
Is this not the man I heard telling my mother this morning
that he has thirty cents in his bank account?Does he know
how much a single cow costs?
Me: “Look, I came prepared. I knew it was going tocome to
this.”
Expectant eyes follow me as I move to the door leading
outside, with one pull it opens and the boy Ipaid is sitting
on the veranda with a live chicken inhis arms.
Me: “Yey wena saan!” (Hey boy.)
He turns with one whip and instantly jumps to hisfeet.
Me: “Why are you holding that chicken like it’s a baby?This
is food twana, don’t you have toys at home?”
He drops his head.
Boy: “Hade malume.” (Uncle)
Me: “Malume ke mao, I told you to call me Sabelo.”(Uncle
is your mother.)
Boy: “Askies Sabelo.” (I’m sorry.)

I grab the chicken from him, the boy has become attached
to it. His eyes become glossy as he looks at the chicken
like it’s the last time he will ever see it.
Me: “Argh! What did you name it? Bobby?”I
know brats like him.
Boy: “Caster because he has long legs.”
Young Bhekifa!!!
Me: “Shame, well say goodbye to him because weare
eating Caster tonight and this one will not be running.”
He rushes off as I laugh at him, people still give birthto
stupid kids.
I’m still the centre of attention when I step back intothe
house, a satisfied smile plays on the corners ofmy lips. No
one would have thought of this.
Magwaza: “What is that?”
A duck!
Me: “Your payment taima.” (Old man.)
I hear gasps in the room, their eyes transition fromconfusion
to shock.
Magwaza: “Is this a joke?”
Where is his wife? The old man is going to collapsefrom all
that shouting.
I sit myself back down with Caster on my lap, my uncles
have not said anything. I think they are beyond shocked, I
can’t tell with their ugly faces. Bhekifa has his head
dropped, must be thanking Godfor a brother like me.
Me: “You see bafo, there is no need to spend
thousands. This chicken was R70 in town.”
I whisper to my brother, he shakes his head after palming
his face. Whatever that means, I deserve a 6pack of
savannah for saving his arse.
Magwaza: “Mageba!”
He’s looking at Mr. 30cents.
Magwaza: “I thought you spoke of respect, this is an
insult.”
Me: “With all due respect taima, this chicken will do.At
least it’s white, that means good luck. You see how the
Zulus are kind hearted, if it were someone else they
would have brought a black one. Nothing says peace, like
a white chicken and that is what wewant with your family.
We want peace, three cows will do nothing, but make
everyone fat.”
I rest my case, if they don’t accept this, then I don’t know.
Magwaza clicks his tongue, he looks defeated.Deal is
done, I know how to negotiate with people, kasi style.
cm®
To be continued©
“THIRTY TWO”

BHEKIFA ZULU.

I’m not the best person to walk the face the earth, this I
know for a fact. I have done my share of wrongs and will
probably pay for it one day. Perhapsthat one day is today,
my punishment has come in aform of my brother. Sabelo
is too old for this, he is stupid that I admit. But there is a
limit to everythingand he has crossed all boundaries.
Mr Magwaza is one hell of an angry man, thinking ofways
to apologise for my brother’s disrespect has me
sweating. My uncle is wise, I hope he will bring
something good to the table.

Sabelo: “Why is no one saying anything?”

My brother is still holding that stupid chicken, hecan’t
be my mother’s child. I refuse, we can’t berelated
honestly. Unless he is losing his mind, it
wouldn’t be a shock.
“Magwaza, Njini, Yengwayo, Manqondo… please
forgive us. It was our mistake to bring this boy
along.”
My uncle says, he should be able to handle this
situation.
Magwaza: “The damage has been done Mageba, Iwill
never forget this insult. This is what we have decided,
you will pay with four cows.”
Sabelo: “Four?”
My brother yells, I have had enough. I need him outside
now, I ruined my relationship with my wife’sfamily by
respecting her as my wife. I am not going to let Sabelo
destroy the little that’s left.
Me: “Say one more word and I will disown you sofast
you will forget you ever had a brother.”
I make sure to whisper enough for only Sabelo to hear, he
turns his wild eyes to me, shock written inthem.
Sabelo: “I’m your only brother, you wouldn’t.”
Me: “Try me bafo, you have embarrassed me enough.Go
wait in the car, we will handle this.”
He is not happy about my decision, he clicks histongue and
places the chicken on the floor.
Me: “Take that thing with you.”
He narrows his eyes at me, grabs the chicken and
mumbles…
Sabelo: “Ohho, Magriza will cook it then, seeing noone
appreciates my efforts.”

Mr Magwaza’s eyes follow Sabelo until he closes thedoor

behind him.
Uncle: “Now that that’s sorted, I would like to
apologise again. We can negotiate the payment
now.”
Magwaza: “There is nothing to negotiate Mageba, I
have made up my mind. Four cows and one more thing,
our children will never get back together unless they
both decide otherwise. The only thing that connects
Bhekifa and Nelly are those kids in
there.”
I can’t stand the thought of Nelly with another man, I
treated her like trash and her finding someone who will
cherish her, someone who will show her that notall men
are the same does not sit well with me.
Magwaza: “With that being said, I would like you to
leave my house. Your son has disrespected us and Iam
afraid we cannot accommodate you any longer.”
Uncle: “But…”
Magwaza: “My mind has been made up.”
He stands to his feet, I want to dispute but it is notwise right
now. Father in-law has been insulted enough.
Magwaza: “Leave my house please.”
Without hesitation, I stand while my uncles
exchange dazed and confused glances.
Me: “Baba this is not how things were supposed to go
down. None of us had any idea my brother woulddo such
a thing. Please forgive us.”
Mr. Magwaza is hearing none of my apology, he
frowns at me, flips the door open for us to leave.This is
our exit, I should add an extra cow as an apology for
Sabelo’s insults.
My uncles send their apologies as they walk past myfather
in-law.
We find Sabelo fast asleep in the car. He still has the
chicken with him, I am going to give him a mouth fullwhen
we get home.

-NELLY PAGE.

My father is fuming as he recites the story on what

happened earlier…that is Sabelo for you.
I watch my mother rub my father’s hand, thankfully my
uncle had to step out. I’m the one stuck with teenage-old
parents. I change seats to give them privacy, well maybe
their public display of affection makes me uncomfortable.
My father grimaces as hesees me jump to a different
couch, slowly I shrug and pray he doesn’t ask why I’m
distancing myself.
Mom: “But you shouldn’t have let them leave without
eating.”
That’s the woman in my mother talking, the wife inher
has intertwined her fingers with my father’s. I don’t
remember Bhekifa and I doing that.
Dad: “Eat my food after insulting me like that?”He
is not getting over this anytime soon.
Me: “Don’t stress about it too much baba, think ofyour
health.”
Dad: “I’m not as old as you think.”
He’s kidding.
Dad: “Everything is going to be okay my baby and don’t
worry about the kids, I will explain to them whythey
couldn’t meet their father today.”
Yeah, lie to them and promise to buy them anythingthey
want, that is his way of explaining.
Me: “I know baba, this is the beginning of a new dawn.
My life will evolve around my children now, it’s
not going to be easy though.”
Dad: “Nothing in life is easy, and nothing is permanent.
You’re going to pick yourself up and livelife to the fullest,
you deserve to be happy.”
This is the kind of father I ordered.
Me: “Thank you, baba.”
I would hug him, but we don’t do that in this
household.
Me: “Uncle must be on his way back, let me go dishup.”
I leave the love birds, I think I’m happy about today’s
outcome. Knowing my father will always protect megives
me hope, hope for a new beginning.

-NKATEKO MATHEBULA.

It turns out the person responsible for Nelly beingattacked

is a woman and she is sitting in my livingroom. From a
personal assistant to an enemy, this
world is cruel.
Me: “Buhle!”
I say, walking into the living room. One of my boyswho
brought her here moves to guard the door.
Buhle: “What do you want from me?”
Her voice trembles.
Me: “Not so brave are we?”
She jumps from the couch in an attempt to run, I push her
back down and she falls with a gasp escaping between her
lips. Her eyes widen as she glares up at me, her fear filled
eyes glisten with tearswhich is funny because this the same
woman who a paid a man to sexually harass and kill
another woman.
Me: “Tell me, what is a young lady like you doing witha
man like Bitso?”
If her eyes could go any wider they would, she blinksand her
shifty eyes drop to her feet.
Buhle: “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Oh!
Me: “I would be careful with my answers if I wereyou, I
am not here to play with you woman.”
I grip her cheeks with my fingers and squeeze till shestarts
grunting. Her head moving to and fro.
Me: “I asked you a question.”
Buhle: “He… he’s my cousin.”
Me: “Nice try… Why did you send him to kill Nelly?”
She is startled by the bomb I drop, her mouth hangsopen
with no words said.
Buhle: “Did Bitso tell you that? He lied, I only told himto
scare her. But he had his own plans, he wanted tohave fun
with her and…”
Me: “Enough!”
Impassively, I laugh at her lies and release her cheeks.
She wheezes while rubbing the pain away from her face.
My hand reaches for an envelope onthe coffee table. Her
eyes narrow as I hold it to her.
Buhle: “What is that?”
Me: “Open it.”
I watch her facial expression transition from fear to
confusion as she opens the envelope.
Me: “These are your travel documents, you and yourson are
leaving the country.”
Buhle: “What? I’m not going anywhere.”
Me: “That’s where you’re wrong, I know what you have
been up to. Now it’s either you take this offer orI make
calls and send you straight to jail. How will awoman like
you survive in a terrible place like that? ”
I thought this might get her attention, her lips quaverand
eyes flash with fear.
Buhle: “Please, I didn’t do anything.”
Me: “Women like you are good at this fake crying.”Buhle:
“What do you want from me?”
She yells, wiping away her crocodile tears.
Me: “I told you, you don’t know what I am capable of sisi.
Sending you to jail would be so easy for me, one
phone call and you will have a list of charges in yourname.
Crimes you wouldn’t dream of committing.”
My plan is working, the woman is tongue tied.
Buhle: “I… I…have a son, he needs his father.”
Me: “I did my homework sweetheart, your son mightas
well be fatherless. Let go of whatever hope you have of
getting that man, it’s never going to happen.”
Buhle: “You know nothing about me or my son.”
This woman is brave, I stride to sit on a couch opposite her,
making sure not to break eye contact.
Me: “My boy over there is going to accompany you
to Park Station, you will take the first bus to Namibia.You
will find someone waiting for you there after crossing the
boarders, he will take you to where you will be staying for
a month until you’re able to pay your own rent.”
Buhle: “A month? How will I even get a job overthere?”

Me: “You’ll find out when you get there, go home,

pack your bags and get the hell out of this country. Nelly
is not going to breathe the same air as you, youshould be
in Nambia by sunrise tomorrow. If I hear that you’re back
in South Africa or have contacted Nelly, I will personally
hand you over to the police with evidence and take your
son to an orphanage.”
Buhle: “Fine, I will go.”
I nod at the man at the door, he steps closer.
Me: “Get this trash out of my house, make sure sheboards
the bus today.”
He nods at my instructions and leads Buhle out.
Nelly has been through enough with that uselessman
she is married to. This should lessen her burden, if she
didn’t have children with that man, Iwould deal with
him.

-NELLY PAGE.

Shopping has become my favourite thing to do, it is

therapeutic. It’s even more fun when the money I’m
spending comes from my pockets. Bags are my current
obsession, I’m not a shopaholic. I have limits.
As I stride down the aisle at a clothing store, my eyes
crash into a tall dashing gentleman and he issmiling at
me. The powerful posture has my heart jumping to my
throat. Hands rammed into the pockets of his black
fitting formal pants, shouldersconfidently straight. The
familiarity on his face hasme staring for way too long. I
know this man.
“Nelly.”
This is his way of greeting.
Me: “I know you.”
That is the first thing that comes to mind.
“Of course you do, remember the parking lot
incident.”
Me: “Nkateko? Wow, I didn’t think I would see youagain.”
Nkateko: “Here I am.”
We exchange pleasantries and he asks if he can tagalong
while I do my shopping. I don’t get to buy
anything, the man with me has me distracted. So wewalk
out of the clothing store. As we get outside, Nkateko
slides in my way, softly stopping me from moving.

Nkateko: “Have lunch with me.”

It’s not an enquiry, I could say no but the beautifulsmile on
his face is not allowing me to do so.
Looking at him, I am flabbergasted by how beautifulthe man
is. I know beautiful is farfetched, but my experienced eyes
cannot deceive me.
Neat fade haircut, clean-shaven and skin so smooth,
reminds of that Ferrero Rocher advert. He is handsome
from the depth of his delicate brown eyesto the gentle
expression of his deep voice. His soul seems to shine
through his cocoa brown skin.
Nkateko: “Nelly!”
I blink myself back to life, his mouth keeps the smilethat
stretched his lips when he asked me to a date seconds
ago, before I got lost in God’s creation. I raise my
eyebrows, wanting him to repeat his ask.
The smile quietens down, it’s still making my kneesweak.
Nkateko: “Have lunch with me.”
There I go nodding like a desperate woman which Iam
not.
Me: “Only because I’m hungry.”
The chuckle he emits states that he sees throughme.
Nkateko: “There’s a nice place I know around here,
shall we?”
Okay, he takes my hand into his. He is not shy.

I’m led to a restaurant, we’re greeted at the entranceand

led to our table by a waitress. I notice how Nkateko
walks too close, not in a weird way. But hisnearness says
I am willing to protect you and I thinkI like the feeling of
it. It’s nice to feel protected. We place our orders and the
conversation begins the moment the waitress leaves.
Nkateko: “How have you been?”
I shrug my shoulders, life is going okay. I can’t complain
about anything, Buhle has gone M.I.A. Shemust have
given up, the CCMA case was dropped. Ihaven’t heard
from that pest in months.
Bhekifa paid what was expected of him, his family had
to apologise for Sabelo’s insults. I guess they are on
good terms with my father, he is a forgivingman. The
man is trying to secure a place in heaven,he has no
choice but to see good in everyone. Thekids are doing
well too, they see their father every second week of the
month.
Me: “I have been okay actually.”
The response is accompanied by a genuine smile.
Nkateko: “You are different from the last time I sawyou,
there is hope in your eyes.”
Me: “I’m trying to pick myself up, and live life likethere
is no tomorrow.”
Sulking is a no option, Nkateko nods, his lips almostforming
a smile.
Nkateko: “I’m glad. Would you believe me if I said Ihave
been looking for you since that day?”
Me: “Really?”
He chuckles, the way his lips move in that soft laughmakes
me want to know how they move in a kiss, how his hands
follow the curves of my body. His eyes are inquisitively
looking into mine, I would shy away if I had a shy bone in
me. In this staring moment, Nkateko reaches his hand
across the tableto touch mine.
Nkateko: “Can I stay?”
The whisper has me biting my bottom lip before I letmy
lips form a bashful smile.
Me: “Stay?”
Nkateko: “In your life, I have been going crazy looking
for you. I don’t think I would survive beingaway from
you.”
His words have me laughing, I’ve heard pickup linesand
this one tops them all.
Me: “How many women have you said that to?”
Nkateko: “One.”
His face suddenly takes a serious expression, his hand
lightly tightens around mine. He rubs my handwith his
thumb, the contact causes me to tremble. I think he notices
because a smirk develops under theraised eyebrow.

Nkateko: “I have better things to do with my time than

chase women, you’re the first woman that has caught my
attention in a long time. I’m a straightforward person,
Nelly. I don’t hide behind blushes, heart beats and goose
bumps. You’re slowly creeping into my heart and I would
like to getto know you, see what my heart is so excited
about. Itold it to calm down, but it won’t listen. It’s been
jumping with excitement for months.”
Me: “Smooth.”
This man knows his way through words, he wouldsell
me the sun and I would buy it as hot as it is.
Me: “You’re so overconfident.”
I’m starting to like the way he laughs.
Nkateko: “Maybe I am, but this is the real me
talking.”
Me: “I don’t even know you.”
Nkateko: “Nkateko Mathebula, a Tsonga guy born and
bred in Soweto. I’m the only child of my parentswho died
when I was eighteen, my aunt and her husband took care
of me until I was able to fend for myself. I’m financially
stable, enough to buy a loaf ofbread. Short term goals, get
to know the beautiful Nelly and make her fall for a loser
like me. Long termgoals, fall hopelessly in love with Nelly
and give her the world just as she deserves.”

I’m speechless, who is this man? Looks can be deceiving,

that shouldn’t stop one from living though.Giving him a
chance wouldn’t be such a bad thing, the waitress
interrupts with our orders just as I’m about to voice out.
One step at a time, that’s what we’ll do. I think I want this,
I want to know how it feels to be truly loved by a man.
cm®
To be continued©
THIRTY THREE”

Years later…

CHERYL ZIKHALI…

Mariam Zulu… I knew she was going to be trouble first

time I met her. Bhekifa had forgot to mention that his
mother is a pain in the ass, for years the woman would
throw insults at me each time our paths crossed. At first I
endured for the sake of theman I love, I succumbed to her
foul mouth.
Suspicious of her possessive nature toward her son,the need
to control him and everything he is, I took itupon myself to
read the woman and I found what drove Mariam Zulu. It
was her son’s bank balance, Mariam wanted even the last
two cents Bhekifa had.

Like a hurricane, I had to force myself into the circle.A

line had to be drawn, Bhekifa and I on one side,
Mariam and Sabelo on the other. Those two would kill me
if they could, that’s because Bhekifa has longforgotten
about them. Here he is, in deep slumber next to me.

In just about two minutes, exactly 8:46, Bhekifa’s phone

will ring. I sit up from the bed and reach for his phone on
the nightstand, a countdown in my head begins and… the
mobile buzzes, we are off to agreat day. Mariam’s number
mirrors on the screen, stretching my mouth into a smile I
swipe to receive.
Me: “Good morning.”
My greeting is sent off with a contented tone, my eyes
take time to adore the man peacefully sleepingnext to me.
He stirs a bit and goes back to his soft snores. I scurry
out of the bedroom lest I wake Bhekifa up.
Mariam: “Put my son on the phone.”
Ahh! How I love this woman, if she were a man, I
would surely be turned on by her ability to practice
dominance on me. Three years later and she still
thinks she has the upper hand. Me:
“Unfortunately, he is sleeping.”
Mariam: “Well wake him up.”
Exactly what I was talking about.
Me: “Bhekifa is a hardworking man sis Mariam, he needs
his sleep. I am sorry, I’m going to have to denyyour
request.”
Heaven only knows what she is doing right now, it makes
me happy knowing her heart has fallen intopalpitations.

Mariam: “What have you done to my son? He doesn’tcall

or come home anymore. I hardly see a cent from him,
you…”
Me: “Come on Mariam, you didn’t think I would sit around
and let you milk Bhekifa dry, did you? Bhekifawas naïve, he
couldn’t see right through you. You turned him into a
zombie, made him dance to your tune. I had to make him
see you for what you really are, a selfish gold digger who
only cares about filling
her plate.” Mariam:
“Enough!”
Lord of heaven’s armies, how many times do I haveto tell
her not to yell?
Mariam: “Bhekifa is my son, I gave birth to him. Hewill
come back to me, I don’t know how long it willtake. I will
have my son back.”
Her words have me laughing my head off, she isgood at
this comedy thing.
Me: “Argh shame, you’re still singing the same songyou
sang years ago? Come on sis Mariam, you cando better
than that.”
Mariam: “You’re an evil woman wena Sherin.”
Me: “Careful Mariam, your heart is not strong enough
to jump at such a great height. You’re evenstruggling to
pronounce my name.”
Mariam: “I hate you.”
Me: “Nc nc nc, such a strong word at your age? That
cannot be good, who will pay for your hospital bills
since your son wants nothing to do with you?
Unless… our precious Sabelo has found a job? Don’ttell
me… uvukile umalambane?” (He is back on his feet?)
Mariam: “To hell with you, Sherin.”

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I might need to call an ambulance, this woman willpass out

from all this shouting.
Me: “Goodbye to you too sis Mariam.”
She hangs up with a tongue click, a habit of hers, Ihave
perceived.

-NELLY PAGE.

This man has been holding me like this for three years
and each time feels like the first, I still love theway his
arms enfold around me; Lord his scent andhis gentle
voice whispering sweet nothings into myear. From the
day I agreed to be his, I waited for a time he would
disappoint and turn on me. I stoppedwhen he assured me
that this is all of him, he wouldgive me more if he could,
but that would only
suffocate me…his words, not mine.

I know, I know; he sounds too good to be true. Jointhe

queue as we lay in wait for the day he will showhis true
colours.
I fall into giggles as Nkateko nuzzles neck, this manis a
hickey giver and I have grown to love neck kisses
because of him.
Nkateko: “Avuxeni Nkatanga.” (Good morning my
spouse.)
Me: “Morning.”
This is how I’m woken up most of the time, I have no
comment about this ongoing honeymoon phase. A longing
to turn on the bed and face him arises, I meet his eyes.
They are usually small in the morning,half-lidded.
Nkateko smiles, my eyes swallow his beauty, he hasn’t
changed a bit in the years.
Nkateko: “You’re staring, again.”
He points out, with a chuckle. My eyes shift away from
him, his finger on my chin brings them back.
Nkateko: “Don’t ever stop looking into my eyes
Nkatanga, I love how your soul paints me and claimsme as
your own.” (My spouse.)
Jesus! This man cannot be real, I whimper due to theerotic
whisper and accept the swift kiss his plump lips offer. He
tastes like nothing I have ever tasted before.
Me: “I told you to stop calling me that, we are notmarried.”
I’m not going through that again.
Nkateko: “I don’t need a ring to tell me that you are my
better half, you are mine Nelly. You make my heart race
in a way that leaves my head spinning, you’re the only
person that makes me nervous. My palms sweat at the
thought of you, I never know what to do with myself when
you walk into the room.Everything else ceases to exist and
all I see is you, Nkatenga.” (My spouse.)
His hoarse voice evokes a deep need in me, my hands
start roaming on his bare chest down to his torso. He
smirks, loving the way my hands worship
his body.

Nkateko: “Are we staying in today?”

His lips work on my earlobe, his hands leave printson
my back.
Me: “It is a Saturday, I don’t see why not?”
That’s the desperate me talking, maybe I love being
pampered by him.
Last year I acquired a house and moved out of my
parent’s house with my children. Nkateko sleeps over a
lot, there is a drawer of his things. He has hisspace in the
bathroom as well, I love how he sees forever with me. I
have been to his house. The manmakes me feel like I make
peanuts for a living, he lives, looks and smells lavish.

Bhekifa ended up being the one to file for divorce, itwas

finalised about two years ago. I didn’t want thehouse as it
had bad memories, I haven’t heard fromhim in a while. I
don’t care about seeing Bhekifa,
what worries me is how he has neglected his children. He
has stopped coming to their soccer practise, he doesn’t
take their calls as often as he used to and when he does,
the conversation is brief.I haven’t seen a cent from
Bhekifa in a year, he seems to be forgetting he has kids.
Nkateko: “Nkatenga!” (My spouse.)
His voice deliciously glides in my ear, I blink myselfout of
my fretting thoughts to find a look of worry inNkateko’s
eyes.
Nkateko: “I lost you for a second there, you’re so fond of
spacing out lately. Won’t you share what your mind is
showing you? I am a jealous man Nkatenga, your mind is
competing with me, it seemsto fight for your attention as
well.”
I laugh at his statement, a ghost of a smile embraces his
beautiful features. Nkateko is a laugher, he also can be
serious when need be. And when it comes to me and the
children, he doesn’t play. He treats them with love and
respect and givesthem all the attention he can.
They have grown to love him over the years, Ayandaas well.
I thought she would be the most difficult, butmy baby didn’t
fret whatsoever.
Me: “I’m sorry, I’m just worried about the children.They
miss their father.”
Bringing up the ex could ruin the perfect moment,
Nkateko grimaces a little before pulling me into his
chest. His arms snake my waist and his hands wander
on my back, gently rubbing me to comfortability.

Nkateko: “Why do you worry about that man? I am

here, I will take care of you and the kids.”
A slow exhalation radiates from me as I shuffle under
Nkateko’s arms. Why does he have to be soperfect?
Me: “I know, but he can’t abandon his children. Theyneed
him, I don’t care what Bhekifa does with his life.But I can’t
let my children suffer because of my choices. I know he’s
doing this because I left him, he is angry and is taking it
out on the kids.”
Nkateko: “I can have a talk with him, get him to seethem.”
Is he insane? I raise my head to catch a glimpse ofhis
face.
Me: “Bhekifa is one stubborn man, he won’t listen toyou.”
He raises an eyebrow as if I have given him a
challenge.
Nkateko: “Are you doubting my power of persuasion
Nkatenga?” (My spouse.)
My forehead is braced with his soft lips, causing meto
smile like an infatuated teenager.
Me: “How can I? That would be an insult on its own.”Lord!
That smile still affects me till today.
Nkateko: “Do I have your permission to knock somesense
into that man?”
Me: “Don’t worry about it, I’ll talk to my father. I
wouldn’t want you to have problems with Bhekifa.”
Nkateko: “Well, I don’t mind really. You know I would
do anything for you.”
Am I lucky or what?
Me: “I know and I’m grateful for you.”
His hand finds my cheek, the stroke is gentle and soft, it
has me shivering in his arms. Seeing how heaffects me,
Nkateko smiles.
Nkateko: “I love you, Nkatenga.”
A soft kiss on the lips, I return it. I haven’t masteredthe
three magic words yet, Nkateko has no troublesaying it.
It doesn’t take long for me to get lost in euphoria, all my
troubles are washed away in this seamless moment.

-SABELO ZULU.

Three… three years of pure torture. Whoever said God

hears desperate prayers lied. I am living proof. God, how
long does it take to answer a single prayer?Just one
prayer?
“What are you thinking about, wena?”
Sigh!
The course of all my problems asks, I could tell her the
truth and say I was hoping God would have takenher by
now, but she is fragile lately since Cheryl happened.
Me: “Nothing magriza.”
She sighs and leans back on the couch, her feet reston the
table as she places her chin on the palm of her hand.
Me: “What is wrong with you? Did Jethro break yourheart
again?”
Mariam found herself a little something to keep her
company, as old as she is, she lays on a wrinkled flabby
chest. A man by the name of Jethro who livesa few houses
down, his wife died six months ago and Mariam was there
to comfort the man. I bet youa million, the comforting
included warming Jethro’sdead wife’s side of the bed.
Eeeww!!!
Mariam: “We are doomed Sabelo, that witch has my
son by the hooks.”
Ohoo… tell me something I don’t know.
Me: “Bhekifa has always been a fool, he is easilycontrolled
by women.”
My brother was meant to be a woman, no lie. He istoo
soft for my liking.
Mariam: “How can Bhekifa do this to me? How canhe
abandon his own mother? I gave him life and nursed him
till he was able to fend for himself. Howdoes he simply
forget that?”

Me: “What will complaining do for you? Just admit it

magriza, you have lost your cool. I thought the olderyou
get, the more powerful you become. You are an
embarrassment to the witches’ association, they should
have you dismissed.”
Mariam: “What are you saying, you stupid boy?”
Me: “The truth magriza, look at Lebo’s grandmothernext
door. She managed to renovate her house, the old witch
doesn’t have knees to support her legs, but
she lives alone in a double story. Stairs mama, stairs.While
it takes me two seconds to get to my bedroom,you think I
don’t want to run upstairs like they do in the movies?”
Clicking that old tongue of hers is all she knows, ithas
done nothing for her in life.
Mariam: “And your point is?”
Me: “That old woman is ninety years old, she looks like
she will crack and bleed to death any time, but atnight she
runs like a cheater.”
Most witches are grannies, being a witch comeswith
age, this I know. The older, the stronger.
Me: “You failed to bewitch Cheryl, that’s when I knewthat
we were doomed. Jeer that woman can talk, what did my
brother see in her?”
I thought we had seen it all with Nelly, Cheryl is awalking
nightmare.
Mariam: “If I were a witch, Sherin would be dead bynow.
That’s how much I hate her.”
She can’t even say the name right, that’s why she
failed to bewitch her. Her demons got lost looking for a
Sherin, meanwhile Mariam meant to say Cheryl.

Me: “Like I said, you don’t have it in you to take on that

woman. Nelly was an easy target, we managedto break
their marriage. I don’t understand how it’s not possible
with Cheryl, Bhekifa jumps at her command and does
everything she tells him to. Thiscan’t be it, it can’t be the
end of us magriza.”
Mariam: “I have run out of ideas Sabelo, Sherin madesure
not to eat my food whenever Bhekifa brought her along
and she stopped him from eating as well.
My own son is away from me because of her.”
Someone give that girl a bells, she is smart I have togive her
that.
Me: “Well; I don’t care who you have to team up with, get
Cheryl out of Bhekifa’s life. I’m tired of eating chicken
feet every night, I dream of chickens chasingme. This is
not the life I ordered, I should be in Nkandla rubbing
shoulders with Zuma. Not looking at your old face, no
offence mama, but ishayile.”
(Your time is up.)

Mariam has never liked my honesty, she glares withso

much condemnation.
Mariam: “I will not comment on that because you area
failure in life and what I have to say about you willdrive
you to suicide.”
Listen to this old woman, what is she trying to say?
Me: “The failure is still here, tolerating you and your
Bhekifa is pleasing the woman who has separatedyou
from your atm. Continue insulting me, magriza,and I will
still be here until you kick the bucket.”
Mariam: “And what is special about your presence inmy
life? You are an unemployed man, you sit on mycouch
day in and day out waiting for my governmentsalary. You
are a joke Sabelo.”
I will not be insulted by the likes of Mariam, a witchwho has
fallen off her broom.
Me: “A joke is that man you call a son, when last didyou see
his ugly face? He refuses to come over or
even take your calls. I have a feeling that the only time
Bhekifa will come here is when you have died.”
Mariam: “What is wrong with you? Why do you keep
talking about my death?”
She doesn’t get it, does she?
Me: “This is a hint mama, you need to let go. Stop fighting
it, the afterlife is a beautiful place I promiseyou. It’s a
million times better than earth, there is nochicken feet there.
Trust me, I have heard stories.”
A cushion is thrown at me, it’s too late to duck.
Mariam: “I am not dying anytime soon, do you hearme,
Sabelo?”
Eish! I need to breathe, Mariam’s gaze follows me asI
stand to my feet.
Me: “God has never loved me, I knew it.”
Mariam: “Voetsek wena Sabelo.” (Piss off.)Me:
“Nawe.” (You too.)
I whisper, but dammit, she hears me.
Maraim: “What did you say?”
I’m facing her enraged face with one spin, she couldjump
from that couch, but the years have not been kind to her
knees. I’m safe.
Me: “I love you, griza.”
Drop dead…

cm®
To be continued©
“THIRTY FOUR”

BHEKIFA ZULU.

Week five and I am getting more agitated with each

passing moment, you could call me paranoid or a psycho.
Nelly looks happy in these pictures, the lasttime I saw this
smile on her face was during our dating days. I would
sweep her off her feet, I knew she hated my bushy hair and
beard, yet she chose tolove me still. Those were happy
days, days I wouldn’tmind reliving. However, time
changes things and people.
Here I am without my first love, now another man is
making her happy and that does not sit well with me.
Don’t get me wrong, I am content with Cheryl. I love her,
she treats me well. But Nelly will always be in my heart,
her special place can’t be filled by anyone else. Seeing
how my special place has been taken bythat Mathebula
guy… I loathe him, the hate I have for him grows every
second. s
Me: “When were these taken?”
I ask the private investigator, I hired to keep tabs onmy ex-
wife. Every information he comes back with breaks me
into a thousand splinters. Tony comes highly
recommended, he is good at what he does.
He takes a sit on the swivel chair before me, I couldoffer
him something to drink, but these are workinghours.
Tony: “Just last night, the man is here to stay, so it
seems.”
That bastard Nkateko, playing Romeo with my ex-wife.
Me: “Where is this, Tony?”
Tony: “Mpumalanga… weekend getaway. It appearsthe
man has more money than the bank itself.”
Tony chuckles at the exaggeration, I would laugh if Ididn’t
have so much hate for Mathebula.
Me: “You think it’s about the money? Nelly is withhim
because of the money?”
Tony: “I wouldn’t know, you know her best ey. From
what I have observed, she does not have gold digger
tendencies. If anything, she controls how they spendmoney.
You know how women can be obsessed withbudgeting.”
Deep down I know Mathebula loves Nelly, I haveknown
from the time I found out about them.

“Are you kidding me, Bhekifa?”

Dammit! I excuse Tony and greet Cheryl with a kiss,she flips
her head aside, rejecting the peck.
Me: “What are you doing here?”
She is meant to be at work and I hardly get visitsfrom
her during office hours.
Cheryl: “I thought I’d surprise you and bring you
lunch.”
She holds me a takeaway package and finds her wayto a
chair.
Me: “You didn’t have to.”
I should have hidden the pictures on the table, my heart
races while I watch Cheryl flip through picturesof my ex-
wife. Her face scrunched up in hurt, I snatch them from
her and get a frown in return.
Me: “It’s not what you think.”
How do I explain this?
Cheryl: “It can’t be any clearer than this, you’rehaving
her followed.”
Nervously, I shove the pictures back in the envelopeand toss
it in a drawer.”
Me: “She is the mother of my children.”
Cheryl: “So? That doesn’t mean you should keeptabs
on her love life, you’re stalking her, Bhekifa.”
Her voice raises a little, she is well aware how muchI do
not approve of this act. For the fact that I am in the wrong
this time, I will let it slide.

Me: “What’s for lunch?”

I pick the lunch bag and dip my eyes in it, my
stomach grumbles at the smell of grilled chicken. Raising
my eyes, I find Cheryl narrowing her eyes atme and that
has me nodding my head in question.
Cheryl: “What’s going on? Are you still in love with
her?”
Of course, I will always love Nelly.
Me: “No.”
Lying is not as hard as it seems.
Cheryl: “Then what is this? Don’t play with me
Bhekifa, I am not going to take this nonsense fromyou.”
Me: “Relax Cheryl, like I said, it’s not what you think.”
She doesn’t believe me, who am I kidding? I can’t even
convince myself. Cheryl stands, I can’t miss theannoyance
playing at her facial features.
Cheryl: “I’m going home.”
Me: “Wait, please.”
She doesn’t listen, but bolts out of the office. Way togo
Bhekifa, look what you’ve done.
-NELLY PAGE.

I’m not sure what Nkateko does for a living, what I know
is that he can afford this expensive trip. He mentioned
that he owns a private company where they work with the
government. Not wanting to pry, Ididn’t ask any further. I
believe I can trust him, maybe from time to time I pray he
is not into shady dealings. My father would bury me
alive.

Nkateko: “No peeking Nkatanga.” (My spouse.)

We’re at a hotel in Mpumalanga, he said he has a
surprise for me and I was blindfolded after that.
Me: “I can’t see a thing.”
There is silence for a while, his hand on the small ofmy
back confirms his presence and the scent stemming from
him, he smells of citrus fruit. His usual masculine baby
powder scent hovers above the smell of oranges and
lemons. Shembe, this man
smells so delicious. His lips brush against my cheek,a
tease he is. I feel his warm breath around my ear before
he whispers…
Nkateko: “Are you ready Nkatanga?” (My spouse.)
I nod, my heart anticipating whatever it is he has in store
for me. Nkateko guides my steps, we’re moving at a slow
pace. My ears pick up the sound ofthe elevator, a few
steps take us in. I can feel it moving, he continues to keep
a gentle hand on the small of my back.
Nkateko: “Careful.”
He says, taking my hand and leads me out of the elevator.
I’m not certain if it took us up or down thebuilding.
Me: “Where are we?”
Curiosity forces a question out of my mouth.Nkateko:
“You’ll see.”
Excitement lies in his voice, he can’t be as excited asI am.
The man I love lives to surprise me and each surprise
births an excitement in me.
Nkateko: “Are you ready?”
Again this question, curiosity is suffocating me. Me:
“Baby, you asked me that a few minutes ago.”
His laughter fills my ears, he is the only man who finds me
funny. Nkateko slowly loosens the blindfold,we are on the
rooftop and my eyes are beholding themost beautiful
scenery I have ever seen.

Lord, look at your son making a woman like me happy. I

see what you’re doing God and I approve. The setting is
beautiful, a white tent sways slightly inthe middle, inside,
blankets and cushions have beenlaid. Four lantern lights
give light to the night. I see apicnic basket... picnic at
night? Well, look at this romantic man.
Me: “What is this?”
Of course I know what it is.
Nkateko: “This is for the queen of my heart.”
Corny I see, then again he wouldn’t be my Nkateko ifhe
were not corny.
Me: “Nkateko Corny Mathebula.”
This is what I have named him, his laugh dances inthe
air.
Nkateko: “You do know Connie is Harriet Khoza’s
name?”
My giggle is just as reserved as his, he takes me intoa hug
and I melt in his arms.
Me: “Why are you so good to me?”I
don’t want to cry, I won’t cry.
Nkateko: “No, you are good to me. Till this day I am
unable to grasp the fact that you gave a loser like me a
chance.”
His nose nuzzles against mine as he says this, hisbreath
smells like citrus fruit. The aroma is erotic, Ienfold my
arms around him to accommodate his arms roaming on
my back.
Me: “I love everything, it’s beautiful. Thank you,Nkateko.”
He smiles, I love it.
Nkateko: “Anything for you, Nkatanga.” (My spouse.)Me:
“You spoil me too much.”
I introduce as we move to the beautiful setting, handin
hand.
Me: “Will you ever stop doing romantic things forme?”
His eyes catch mine while my breath catches at howhis
gaze digs deep into my soul.
Nkateko: “You are my romance, stopping would
mean there is no more you and I and that is
something I will never let happen.”
Don’t look, nor listen. You might fall for this individual, I
am living a dream and could be woken up one of these
days. I am sure of it. My response isa smile of gratitude,
this is a love I never thought I would experience.

-SABELO ZULU.
Tired, drained and wanting to be free, I have come upwith a
perfect plan that will shake Cheryl’s stubbornheart. Three
of my boys have agreed to do this job with me, we come a
long way. Two of them are my former school mates, we
hustled together and failedtogether. Today we are sinning
together, God forgivemy tired heart.
Cheryl has to go, she is moving at a tortoise’s pace in
our lives and I want to help her speed up lest shefinishes
last in line. She can’t take my brother and think I will sit
back and watch her eat prawns while Ihave to stomach
Rose’s burnt pap and undercooked"runaways" (chicken
feet) every night.

Billy is the driver of the car, I’m seated on the

passenger’s seat. Lwandle and Spha are at the back,it is
dark outside, the perfect time to attack.
Me: “Gents, we have to do this carefully, okay?”
I had briefed them on how it’s going to go down.
Billy: “I still think one person should go, she’s awoman,
it can’t be that hard to tackle her.”
Spha: “Can we do this already, I have a meeting toget
to.”
What meeting is he talking about? Unless he is talking
about meeting his baby mama. Spha is theonly man I
know who is afraid of women, how did Ilet him tag
along?
Lwandle: “Two people should do it.”
Billy: “Why are we even debating about this? This iswhat we
do gents.”
Spha: “This one is different, she’s Bheki’s woman. Istill
can’t believe you want us to do this Sabelo, yourbrother
won’t like it when he finds out.”
Me: “He won’t find out, Bhekifa is an idiot. He doesn’tknow
what is happening around him.”
My brother is too naïve.
Lwandle: “Let’s do this man.”
Billy: “Entlek, why isn’t Malaika here? I thought we’rea
team.”
Malaika thinks he is better than us because he was
chosen by his ancestors, it’s just a calling, nothing
serious. Now we have to bow down like he walks on
streets of gold.
Spha: “A team with who? Malaika doesn’t associate
himself with people Billy, you know that. The only reason
he tolerates us is because he feels obliged to,perhaps for
old time’s sake.”
Me: “I’m just glad he’s not here, that man is darkgents
it’s actually scary.”
I think he is my mother’s business associate, I have a
feeling they hold their meetings in my house while we are
sleeping. That house is depressing, there is adark presence
there.
Spha: “That is ridiculous, Malaika would never lay a
hand on you. You need to relax.”
This one likes witches.
Me: “You can relax, as for me, I’m going to keep myeyes
wide open.”
Billy: “Me too.”
Spha: “Guys seriously though, you’ve known Malaika for
years now. If he wanted to hurt you, he would’ve
done it already.”
Me: “I’ve known the devil my whole life as well andthe
bastard is still trying to take me down. I’m nottaking
chances with Malaika.”
Lwandle: “Eyy, that dude must have escaped fromthe
devil’s clutches. What kind of a human being ishe?”
Spha: “He belongs to the ancestors, you people are
seriously not judging him. What if they are listeningto this
conversation? You’re going to die a painful death, don’t
say I didn’t warn you.”
Witch lover.

Me: “God, I’m too young to die. Listen Spha, if he killsme

then tell my mother to cremate my body and scatter my
ashes in her garden, maybe her spinach will finally grow.
It’s been months since she plantedit, but it refuses to
breed.”
Spha: “What?”
Me: “I’m too handsome to be thrown into a big heavy
box, buried six feet under so my body can decompose.
Hell no, the thought of it makes me cringe and if my
family buries me, I will haunt themtill they exhume my
body and cremate it…”
Spha: “Sabelo, you’re insane.”
Me: “Insane and serious, if I die before Mariam, I know
she will turn me into a zombie. Imagine me, azombie
gents, no, I’d rather die.”
Lwandle: “But you’ll be dead idiot.”
Me: “I don’t care, no one is turning me into a
zombie.”
I don’t know what they are laughing at, this is a
serious matter.
Billy: “There she is.”
He points at Cheryl jumping out of a taxi, look at her
heading to my brother’s house as if she helped build his
legacy. That woman is Satan’s twin.
Me: “Let’s go gents.”
Dressed in all black and balaclavas, we quietly jumpout of
the car, Billy remains behind.
Carefully and quietly we follow her, she is not cautious
about her surroundings. Thank God for quiet
neighbourhoods. Just as Cheryl turns on the discreet
street, we corner her. Spha pins her againstthe wall
ignoring the horrified look she has on her face and holds
a knife to her throat.
Me: “You scream and you're dead.”
I stop her as she opens her mouth to scream, I makesure
to keep my voice low just in case she recognises it.
Cheryl: “Please take anything, don’t kill me.”
Lwandle: “Who said you can talk?”
Cheryl: “What do you want from me?”
I must say, I’m loving this blissful moment. Seeingthe all
brave Cheryl tremble with fear.
Spha: “Stay away from Bhekifa.”
Dammit, he wasn’t supposed to say that. This woman is
too smart that she will catch on and figureout that I’m
behind this if not Mariam. Desperate to cover up my
track, I punch her across the face and
she falls to the ground. She doesn’t look up, buttouches her
bleeding jaw.

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Spha: “This is a warning sisi, know your place. You

have poked a snake in its hole.”
Spha adds, adding multiple kicks on her stomach.
Clearly terrified for her life, Cheryl doesn’t scream,but
curls her body on the floor while silently crying.
Lwandle: “That’s enough, let’s go.”
Lwandle wants to ruin the party, I’m enjoying this.
Me: “You think this is a novel, you think you’re Hlomuand
have an army of Zulu men ready to die for you?
Wake up sisi, uzofa.” (You will die.)
Cheryl: “Stop, please stop.”
How I love the sound of her crying, life can bebeautiful
sometimes.
Lwandle: “She has learnt her lesson, let’s go.”
This monkey is panicking under that balaclava, heshould
have stayed in the car. Lwandla pulls me back as I
continue to kick Cheryl, I want her to feelthe pain I felt
when eating chicken feet. One more
kick from me and we take off, leaving her bleeding on the
ground and sobbing. I feel like a king, dammitI’m on top
of the world.

cm®
To be continued©
“THIRTY FIVE”

BHEKIFA ZULU

What is a car like that doing in an affluent

neighbourhood? The driver slows down as he approaches
my car, he looks as dodgy as the other three men in the
car. Wait! Is that Sabelo at the back?His eyes widen when
they meet mine, he ducks as if a bomb has been thrown at
him. The car speeds off before I could ask the driver to
pull over. I haven’t seen my brother in ages, what was he
doing here?

Approaching my house, I notice a woman face up onthe

ground. When I’m at close sight, my heart jumpsto my
throat. Cheryl is passed out, her face looks badly
battered. I stop the car and rush to her, my heart racing
faster than my legs.
Me: “Cheryl!”
She doesn’t respond to my call.
Me: “Hold on baby, I got you.”
I scoop her up and flash to the car, there is ahospital not
far from here.

She is rushed into the emergency room, my mind has

not gathered what has happened yet. We havenever had
any robberies in my community, it’s actually the safest
complex I know.

“Mr. Zulu?”
A male voice stops me from following the line ofthoughts in
my head.
Me: “How is she?”
The doctor explains that she has a fractured rib,
thank fully she doesn’t need surgery.
Me: “May I see her please?”
He escorts me to the room and I am given five minutes
because the patient needs to rest. The bruises on Cheryl’s
face evoke a type of anger in me,
she doesn’t deserve this. What wrong has she everdone in
her life to be punished in this manner?
Me: “You’re going to be okay Cheryl, I will findwhoever
did this to you.”
I brush the back of her hand while I keep going backto
when we met and the years we spent together.
Unlike a lot of people, Cheryl can tolerate my whims, she
has let me get away with a lot. I haven’t been theperfect
partner, however she knows that she lives inmy heart.

As I start to bite my nails, a light bulb switches on inmy

head. A memory of a red citi golf driving out of the
complex comes to play between my lashes, I seeSabelo’s
face and this time my mind catches the guilty look
reflecting in his wide eyes. My chest heaves, I start
wheezing with rage. My brother couldn’t have done this,
it’s impossible. The door opens, I chase my breath, trying
to calm down.
Doc: “Sir, the patient needs to rest.”
I nod, kiss Cheryl goodbye and head out. I need to
see my brother.

-NELLY PAGE.

“What do you think?”

He smiles down at me still holding the soup- smeared
wooden spoon in his hand and I get a funnyfeeling in my
stomach. He shouldn’t be affecting melike this after three
years of dating.
Me: “I love it.”
He smiles, the smile causes a funny feeling in my stomach
again. Am I in love with this man this much that everything
he does affects me? Nkateko knows his way in the kitchen,
he loves cooking too. Talk about perfection, I should stop
titling him, it might just end in tears. We left the hotel and
found a guesthouse, all that trouble because this Tsonga
man wanted to cook for me. People have money to waste,
however, you can’t tell this one what to do.
Nkateko: “It’s almost ready, we’ll eat soon.”
He turns back to the stove to stir the soup, he looksso
edible in an apron. Show me a woman who doesn’t
drool over a man in an apron.
Me: “We could have done this tomorrow you know,we
just ate and I am not hungry.”
The food we ate at the picnic is still doing a vosho inmy
stomach, my intestines feel heavy as fuck.
Nkateko: “You don’t have to eat much, just a few spoons.
It is enough to make me happy. I love doingthings with
you.”

Ahh! I forgot to mention, Nkateko is the definition ofa

black African man. He eats like there is no tomorrow. I
think he is starting to gain relationship weight, it’s that “I
am happy” weight… the “she/he treats me good”
weight… that one that only third parties can spot.
I love his chubby cheeks though, they are starting toshow
and a little flesh on his lower torso. We eat somuch rolls,
that he made a joke just the other day that he will start
looking like bread. I love me a
squishy Tsonga man, so I don’t mind. He can be myteddy
bear…
The food suddenly smells heavenly that my stomach
grumbles, what in the intestines happened to the food that
was there?
Me: “I’m hungry.”
I pout, leaning back against the counter. His gaze
whips to me, a smirk and raised brow claiming hisface.
Nkateko: “I thought you said you were full?”
Me: “I was, now I’m hungry.”
He drops his head and shakes it while chuckling, if Iwere
not his girlfriend, I would have fallen to my knees from
melting. The man is gorgeous, let me point that out for the
umpteenth time. When he brings his face up, he is all
serious as if he never laughed. He is looking at me with a
different fire in his eyes.
Nkateko: “I love this side of you,”
He confesses, striding to me cautiously. My breathe
catches as he closes in on me and enters my personal
space, his usual scent is there, also thesmell of curry
stuck on his clothes.
Me: “Which side?”
Nkateko: “The cute, sulky, childlike side. You makeme
want to eat you up when you do that.”
He is biting my neck as he says this and I am struggling to
keep still, his hands begin to wander about my body, his
face too close to my skin that heleaves barely there kisses on
my face and neck.
Me: “What are you doing?”
The words are whispers, my voice has betrayed me.
Nkateko: “I know how we can make time pass fast.”

His hands glide down my sides, they find the hem ofmy
shirt. Slowly, he lifts it up, enough for his hands to go
under it. I whimper when I feel his warm handson my bare
skin, they gently run up and down my spine while his lips
find their way to mine.
I love how he kisses me, I call it kiss heaven. I feel
his tongue on my lower lip, softly tasting it, he wants
entrance so I part my lips and let him in.
He plunges his tongue in my mouth, it finds mine and
they both dance in perfect harmony. My wholebody
heats up, I need to catch a breather, yet I don’twant to
stop. His hands don’t stop working on my back, they
lovingly glide up and down my spine. Thekiss becomes
heated, insatiable. A hunger we bothcan’t seem to fill,
the only thing we can do is devoureach other. His tongue
goes deeper, invading mine.
Nkateko pulls out of the kiss, leaving me yearning for his
lips. My own lips feel swollen, I’m panting, pursuing my
breath. His eyes move to my lips as hishands stop at the
small of my back. I loop my armsaround his neck, he
smirks and says…

Nkateko: “God, you look so perfect right now.”I

look like a mess, a horny mess.
Nkateko: “Nkatanga, you taste better than anything Ihave
ever tasted.”
I manage a giggle, his forehead gently falls on mine.
Nkateko: “What have you done to me, Nkatanga? I can’t
think straight, I feel like a love struck teenager.”
I don’t know how to respond to his question, I feel the
same. I am on cloud nine and not ready to comeback
down.
He pecks my lips, his hands glide to my hips and with
one whisk he lifts me and sits me on the counter. He
stands between my legs, his hand travels to my nape. It is
a gentle touch, he smiles ashe nears and bites my lower
lip. I whimper, my reaction to this act.

He nuzzles his nose against mine, his eyes are closed, yet
I can still spot the passion and love on his face. I close my
eyes, wrap my arms around him.
Nkateko: “I would do anything for you to have my
surname.”
My heart jumps, looking for a way to escape. I have
nothing against marrying him, it is marriage I have a
problem with. After Bhekifa, I don’t think I will everwalk
down the aisle again. I pop my eyes open, his are still
closed.
Me: “Nkateko…”
Nkateko: “I know… I know how you feel Nkatanga.
There is no harm in me hoping, maybe one day. I won’t
hold it against you if it never happens. You’rewith me
and I know I will never let you go.”
Lord this man, my eyes close as he caresses mycheek
with his warm hand.
Nkateko: “I love you, Nkatanga. Ndza ku rhandza.” (I
love you.)
He says so fluently and it has me tearing up as I feelthe
love he speaks of consume every part of my being.
Me: “I love you too Nkateko.”
I feel him smile when his lips brush against mine,they
mingle. In no time our tongues are dancing together
again and his hands tattooing my skin. Icould stay like
this forever.
-SABELO ZULU.

The guys drop me at my mother’s gate, panic has

suddenly taken over. Bhekifa saw me, I think he sawme…
I think he recognised me… I think he put two and two
together after he found Cheryl. I think I am adead man
walking… Stop thinking Sabelo and think of a way out…
Dammit, my brain will explode with all this thinking… I
bite my tongue as the damn word refuses to leave my
head.

I need a drink, black label will do, maybe two… I jumpthe

street from my mother’s gate and head to the Indian tuck
shop two blocks from my house.
Me: “My friend, give me two bottles of black label.”
I count a few notes and coins and pass it to the vendor, my
mother’s government salary really comesin handy. There
is enough change to buy a cigarette,it will help calm my
nerves. I decide to drink one
before going home, the place is crowded with peoplecoming
to spend the little cents they have.

“Yey wena Sabelo!” (Hey you.)

Ehh! What is she doing here? How did she know thatI am
here? I manage to hide one bottle of black label,she sees it
because her infamous tongue click comes to play.
Me: “What is it?”
I ask, gulping down the drink. People are staring, they
are aware of the dramatic Mariam Zulu who lives on
163 Sgonondo street. Some greet while passing by, I
wish they would pass with her. I can’teven breathe
outside the house.
Mariam: “Where have you been? Why were you not
taking my calls? What are you wearing? Since whendo
you wear black Sabelo?”
Lord take me now, I can even be a security guard in
heaven or a garden boy. Anything to get away fromthis
woman I call my mother.
Me: “Am I under arrest?”
Mariam: “No.”
Me: “Did Rose finally burn the kitchen?”
Mariam: “Not yet.”
Me: “Are you having a heart attack?”
She frowns.
Mariam: “Don’t be stupid.”
Me: “Unless you are approaching your final momentsin
this world and have chosen your coffin, leave me alone.”
The woman literally takes off a sandal and throws itat
me. Her aiming is out of this world.
Me: “Ouch mama that hurt.”
Mariam: “The aim was to kill you, bastard.”
Me: “Do they teach to shoot targets in the dark world?
Damn woman, you never miss. You must be ranking number
one in the witch’s board. Aimer of the week, Mariam Zulu.”
Mariam is fast enough to remove her other shoe andhit me
straight in head.
Mariam: “Where have you been wena Sabelo? Zodwasaid
she saw you get in Billy’s car.”
Zodwa must fall.
Me: “So? He’s my friend.”
Mariam: “He’s a low life who bombs ATMs and steals
from people, iphara Sabelo.” (A gangster.)
Billy is an ATM-bomber? How do I not know this?
People are so greedy with money, he wants to eat
cheese alone.
Mariam: “Where did he take you?”
She asks as I’m about to answer the first question. Imight
tell her because when my brother gets here, he will unite
me with our late father. I’m not ready tobe an ancestor, I
know they are not ready for me aswell.
Me: “I messed up mama, I’m in trouble. You have tohelp
me, can you reverse time? Perform some kindof spell to
make Bhekifa forget, wipe off his
memory.”

Mariam glares, placing her hands on her waist. I

know she is about to ask me something stupid.
Mariam: “What have you done to my son?”
Her son? What am I? Her baboon?
Me: “I saw this day coming magriza, I knew you were
going to turn on me one day. This is me, mama. Your
chicken feet- eating partner. Your onion to your tomato,
your archar to your fatkoek. Today you are worried about
Bhekifa, the so called son who abandoned you for a
vagina.”
When will she get this?
Me: “I thought we were a team, what happened toinja
one inja all.”

“It’s injure-one-injure all Sabelo.”

Some idiot eating a bunny chow says next to me, thelady is
leaning against the wall, chewing like a goat
and a serious inquisitive face. She is listening to us,people
have no filter.
Me: “Yey, fokoff wena. Get out of here, bloody hell.”
Mariam’s tongue click must be contagious becausethe
lady clicks hers. I will smack her senseless oneof these
days.
“Suka, udizzy Sabelo ntwana.” (You’re stupid.)
She throws an insult at me while walking away.
Me: “Unyoko… you nonsense.” (Your mother is
stupid.)
My voice chases her as I shout after her, she turnsand
shows me the middle finger.

Me: “Look at her, nonsense. She even chews like acow,

sies.”
My mother doesn’t look bothered, she wants to know
where her son is. They say mention the deviland he will
show up, here comes my brother’s car.
Me: “Magriza, ngizok’bona half-time.” (I’ll see you
later.)
There is a Caster Semenya in me and right now it isalive
and ready to reach where my feet lead me.
“Sabelo come back here.”
I hear my brother yell and I turn to run back to my
mother, he parks the car on the side of the road. Igrab
both my beers and take off running again, I almost
forgot about them. I know I will be thirstyafter this
marathon.

cm®
To be continued©
"THIRTY SIX"

BHEKIFA ZULU.

“What is wrong with you? Why are you after your

brother?”
My mother blocks my path, I try to move to the left she
moves with me. Same when I move to the right.
Frustrated, I sigh and give in.
Me: “Sabelo beat Cheryl up, she is in the hospitalmama.”
Her eyes narrow, but I see shock and irritation takeover.
Mariam: “What did you call me?”
I don’t understand, so I keep quiet and wait for her toreveal
the reason behind her exasperation.
Mariam: “Bhekifa? So this is you? You rememberthat
you have a mother after all these years?”
Oh Lord, not this.
Me: “Mama come on…”
Mariam: “Come on what? Come on what Bhekifa? You
left me to fend for myself, the woman who gavebirth to
you. You abandoned me, Bhekifa. Today youstand here
and call me mama. Ungijwayela kabi wena.” (You’re
disrespectful.)
Me: “I came here to confront Sabelo…”
Mariam: “Confront Sabelo yomsuzo, who the hell doyou
think you are wena Bhekifa?”
Me: “Mama calm down.”
Mariam: “Calm down yani? You are just like your father, a
huge disappointment. You chase skirts as ifwomen are
becoming extinct.”
She is yelling at the top of her voice and I am
embarrassed to my wits, people are watching.
Me: “I’m leaving, I’ll come tomorrow with the police.
Sabelo is going to pay for what he did to Cheryl.”
My mother pushes me that I stagger and hit my back
against the car.
Mariam: “You will do no such thing, do you hear
me?”
What is she saying to me?
Me: “Sabelo committed a crime, he deserves to belocked
up.”

Mariam: “You are not taking my son away from me, Iwill
disown if you do that. You will be dead to me and when
you die, I will not bury you.”
Me: “Mama you can’t be serious, you’re covering upfor
him?”
Mariam: “Yes I am covering up for him, you left me,
remember? Sabelo is the only son I have left, you can’t be
so cruel to take him from me. I don’t care what he did to
lo Sherin ndini wakho (your stupid Cheryl). I don’t care if
she is dead or alive, I will neverforgive her for breaking
my family apart.”
That is insane, Cheryl did no such thing.
Me: “This is so typical of you mama, blaming other
people for your own evil doings. You think I don’t know
that you and Sabelo were against my marriage
with Nelly, you took everything away from me. I trusted you
and confided in you, but all this while youwere plotting
against me.”
Her eyes widen, shock swims in her eyes and thishas her
drawing back about two feet from me.
Mariam: “What are you talking about?”
She gasps.
Me: “The day I came here to introduce Cheryl, I
overheard you and Sabelo talking about how you
managed to drive me and Nelly and apart. How getting
rid of Cheryl was going to be a walk in thepark.”
Her mouth drops open as she gasps incredulously.
Me: “Why do you think I drifted? I was tired mama, tired
of you controlling my life. Then again, I was angry at
you. Sabelo is an idiot, he has always beenand I am not
justifying his actions. But you should’veknown better,
you’re the adult here. The one who is more experienced,
you ruined me. I will never forgiveyou for that, as for you
considering me dead. If that is what you want, then go
ahead. You are toxic
anyway, it’s too late for my brother. You have himunder
your control. Congratulations Mariam Zulu, you have
destroyed your own family.”

I have gathered the courage to confront her, tears trickle

from her eyes. She carries her hands on her head and
starts sobbing, I will not be manipulated bycrocodile
tears.

Mariam: “Look at us Bhekifa, look what Sherin is doing

to us. She’s the one who fed you all these lies,don’t let her
come between us please son, please.”
I knew she would never take responsibility.
Me: “When will you own up to your mistakes mama?You
know what? Don’t bother answering… I’m out ofhere and
when Cheryl wakes up she will decide if she wants to
press charges. If she decides to send Sabelo to prison, I
won’t stop her.”
I turn and leave her there, sobbing.
-NELLY PAGE.

Me: “We’re coming back tomorrow ma, is theresomething

wrong? Are the kids okay?”
Mom: “There is nothing wrong, am I not allowed tocheck on
my baby?”
At this time of the night?
Me: “You’re fishing aren’t you ma?”She
laughs.
Me: “Is your husband not complaining that you’re onthe
phone instead of giving him attention?”
This is my way of getting rid of her, I am not dishingout
anything.
Mom: “Your father is sleeping, you know how he islately.
Old age is having a toll on him.”
Me: “Is he okay though?”
Nkateko enters the room, he smiles as he strides to
perch himself on the sofa beside me. His face is
quickly buried on my neck and I have to supress alaugh
when he starts placing wet kisses there.
Mom: “He’s fine, the kids too. They miss you.”Me:
“I miss them too.”
I can barely concentrate with this man kissing melike
this, I try to scoot away, but he follows me.
Mom: “Have you spoken to Bhekifa? Ayanda is growing
excessively restless, she hasn’t stoppedasking about him.”
How do I fix this problem?
Me: “I haven’t ma…”
Nkateko sits up with this line, his eyes widen and he
mouths…
Nkateko: “Your mom?”
I nod with a smile plastered on my face.
Nkateko: “Shit!”
He curses and moves away from me like I have a
contagious virus, a giggle surges out of my mouth.
He takes my feet, sits at the far end of the couch; puts
my feet on his lap and starts massaging them.My heart
thumps vigorously as I watch Nkateko serious at work.
His face scrunched, brows knittedand eyes intently
fixated on my feet.

Mom: “Are you there Nelly?”

I blink at the sound of my mother’s voice.Me:
“Sorry ma, what were you saying?”
Mom: “Your father wants to meet up with him.”
Me: “I don’t know if that is a good idea, Bhekifa won’t
change his mind.”
Nkateko’s eyes dart up, he is suddenly curious aboutthe
conversation.
Me: “He is not a child to be reminded of his dutiesma,
he knows that he has children who need him.”
Mom: “I know Nelly, this is for the kids. Let your father do
it, Ayanda is not okay. The boys don’t reallysay much, I
don’t know how they feel about his absence.”
Me: “Okay, if you think that is a good idea. I don’twant
to take part in the meeting.”
The further I stay away from Bhekifa the better, I have
so much to say to him about his negligenceand we
might end up fighting after I have draggedhim down
with my words.
Mom: “I understand, that’s alright.” Me:
“I have to go, kiss the kids for me.”Mom:
“I will, bye.”

Nkateko: “Is there a problem?”

Nkateko asks as soon as I put the phone down, I feelso
sleepy with the way he is caring for my feet.
Me: “My father wants to meet up with Bhekifa.”
Nkateko:”Your father is a wise man, he should
handle this quite well.”
Me: “I believe so.”
He kisses my feet, making me shy away from hisintense
gaze. I hear him chuckle lowly, he loves
teasing me.

-SABELO ZULU.

Bhekifa’s car is not outside my mother’s house, thank

God he left. He thinks he is Mike Tyson that one. Wait a
minute… Why is there a group of peoplecircled outside
my gate? I’m drunk, but not Madlamini’s mqombothi
drunk. (Traditional beer.)
I drag my tipsy self toward the loud crowd.Me:
“What’s going on?”
I ask while paving my way through the multitude, they are
looking at something. Is Mariam performinglive magic or
she transformed into a witch in public?I don’t trust that
old woman.
There she is lying still on the ground, I move in closerto see
if she is sleeping or just chilling. I’m too drunkfor this shit.
Me: “What happened to her?”I
ask a lady beside me.
“She suddenly collapse, I think she is dead.” Dammit, I
could kiss this lady. But I don’t know her…

Mariam’s death scene one: Action!

I throw my hands in the air and scream in horror.Me:
“NOOO! MY MOTHER CAN’T BE DEAD.”
This is as loud as I can go. I kneel on the ground
beside my mother and bury my head on her chest.
Me: “Mama wake up, please.”
Ye ye ye ye! My God is good ooo… I would break intoa
dance, but these fools would burn me alive.
Me: “Call an ambulance, why are you people just
standing there? My mother is dying, Lord don’t takemy
mother from me.”
Satan do your thing ntwana.
“I called an ambulance Sabelo, it’s on the way.”
Some idiot says, emerging from the crowd. Look athim,
smiling as if he got Mandela out of prison. Theambulance
better delay, I need Mariam gone.
Me: “Call the mortuary, my mother is dead.”
Seriously, she looks dead. She better be dead. Thesepeople
are buying my fake tears, let me increase theheat. Who
knows? The Ferguson’s might be passingby and see my
performance. I’ve always wanted to hold Vuyiswa’s hand.
I stand to my feet and stumbletoward the gate, shouting
for Rose.
Me: “ROSE! ROSE My mother is dead Rose.”
Where is this woman? She needs to help me fake grief… I
scream when my wife materializes from thehouse, dressed
in a gown and a stocking covering her hair.

Oh dear Rose, we are not sleeeping tonight. Thewitch

has left the building.

Her face swims in confusion as she sees my acting.

Me: “Your mother in-law is dead Rose, she’s gone.”
Rose is so slow, what is there to be confused aboutwhen
what I have said is as clear as daylight?
Me: “Mariam is dead.”
With my back facing the crowd I wink at my wife, thelight
finally switches on in her stupid head.
Me: “Look over there.”
I point to the crowd. Upon seeing Mariam stagnanton
the ground, Rose screams and runs to her.
Rose: “Mama, mama”
Now my intoxicated brain is confused, is she cryingfor
real or feigning it like me? It doesn’t matter, let me join
her. I have to make this look good.
Mariam is in the middle when Rose and I hug eachother
mourning. Soweto’s first corpse sandwich…

“Sabelo calm down, she is going to be okay.”

I must be hearing demon voices, it’s telling me thatmy
mother is not dead.
Me: “The devil is a liar.”
I dispute, crying my eyes out. Resist the devil and hewill flee
from you.
“Sabelo your mother is not dead, there is a pulse.”
Who said that? I let go of Rose and look up to seethe
same fool who said he called an ambulance.
With the calmest voice, I stand up while saying...Me:
“She’s alive?”
The fool nods, God does not love me.

cm®
To be continued©
THIRTY SEVEN

BHEKIFA ZULU.

Immediate and distant family members are gatheredat my

mother’s house, gloom and sadness permeates the air.
Songs of lamentation add to the depressing atmosphere.
Sad faces lurk about, familydisputes have begun. Each
fighting for a share of mymother’s belongings.
I can’t grasp what the fight is about, my mother had
nothing. The only valuable thing she had to her nameis this
house. She hasn’t been buried yet and the family is ready
to kill each other over pots and plates.
Sabelo will have none of it, he says everything in thishouse
belongs to him. Knowing him, he will bully everyone out
of the house before the funeral. He is atake-no-nonsense
type of man.
The fights are under keeps though, mostly, my mother’s
sisters and their daughters are eyeing her
belongings. Nevertheless, the women mourn morethan they
fight.

I was at home three nights ago when Sabelo calledto tell

me that our mother had a heart attack, at firstI didn’t
answer due to that I was upset with him.
Shock cannot begin to describe what I felt when hebroke
the news, dazed and my mind overthinking things that
left me feeling suffocated by guilt; I rushed to the
hospital.
There was nothing the doctors could do for my mother,
apparently, she was brought in late. She diedbefore I could
get there. Before any of her family members could get
there. To think guilt had come tosettle in my heart, the
damn thing consumed my whole being.

Perhaps if I didn’t confront her, she would still be alive.

Perhaps if I didn’t keep myself away from her,if I had
stayed in her life and made peace with her; my mother
would still be alive today.
“Bafo can I have a word?”
My brother Sabelo whispers beside me, I excuse myself
from the uncles and cousins in the living room. I follow
my brother outside the house, we exitthrough the kitchen.
Sabelo: “We need money for food bafo, as you cansee
the house is crowded. It’s only been two days since
those people arrived and they have finished awhole truck
of Albany bread, yey; those people eatman. Yesis.”
That is stupid, he should know that.
Me: “I don’t mind buying food, I’ll go with S’bongiseni
later.”
S’bongiseni is my uncle’s son, he is about the sameage as
Sabelo. The only cousin I can call a brother. Sabelo is not
happy about my announcement, he furrows his brows in
annoyance.
Sabelo: “S’bongiseni? Did he call you out here to remind
you that we do not have food? No. I did. Give
me the money and I will do it myself.”
Me: “I dont mind, you must be hurting because…”
Sabelo: “Eyyy bafo, just give me the money and yourcar
keys. I will go buy what is needed.”
Why is he raising his voice?
Me: “Fine.”
While fishing for a few notes in my wallet, I decide to
confront Sabelo about the attack on Cheryl.

Me: “Just so you know, I haven’t forgotten what youdid to

Cheryl.”
His jaw drops, Sabelo’s stupidity is annoying.
Sabelo: “I don’t know what you’re talking about bafo,I
don’t even know this Cheryl.”
Me: “Stop acting a fool Sabelo, you need to grow up.”
Sabelo: “Says the man who has abandoned his kids.”
He spits and his words hit a nerve, I truly have
abandoned my children. I don’t know what came
over me the past years, I guess I was too focused on
rebuilding my life that I became selfish. I will have tocall
them or set an appointment with Nelly or something.
Sabelo snatches the money from my hand just when I’m
counting it.
Sabelo: “This is not enough, I need about R5000.”Me:
“For what?”
Sabelo: “Haibo, I told you, I have to buy food. Did yousee
the whole of Zulu nation is in my house? How will I feed
those big bellies with R400? I can’t even buy two boxes of
Romans pizza with this change.”
Me: “You want to eat pizza?”
Sabelo: “The last time my children had it was two
Christmases ago, you decided to buy Cheryl the
whole of Romans and forgot about your family.
Uy’slima bafo.” (You’re an idiot.)
Me: “Watch your mouth Sabelo, I am not your age.”
He’s laughing at me, Sabelo has officially lost hismarbles.
Sabelo: “Askies kee, big brother.” (Sorry.)
I will let this go for peace’s sake.
Me: “I don’t have enough cash on me, I’ll e-wallet youthe
rest of the money.” He snatches the car keys from my
hand and marches out the gate, I will neverunderstand
him.

-SABELO ZULU.
Day of the funeral.

I am not one to celebrate birthdays, what the hell is a

birthday anyway? However, from today I will celebrate a
death-day. Mariam has been laid to rest, Icried all my
tears out. I have nothing left anymore, my tear-tank is
empty so excuse me if I never shed tears again.

My compound is flooding with people, after tears myfoot.

They only here to finish my food. I can’t walk into the
house without bumping into someone, it is crowded
outside as well. Yes, you heard right; I said
crowded.
Honestly I didn’t know we have such a big family,
Mariam’s friends are present as well. Old women who
keep eyeing me with shifty eyes, I think I have aphobia for
old women. When I see them, my mind screams WITCH…

But I love me some young mamas, like this one

passing by. I didn’t think she would come to the
funeral. What am I saying? The woman never
crossed my mind at all. Okay prepare yourself
Sabelo, you could be the one to mend what your
idiotic brother broke.

“Nelly my Neliza!”
She stops and rolls her eyes, the audacity.
Me: “Semhle sana, divorce looks good on you. I seethe
glow, sun kissed maan. Look arts you, ngwanadaddy.
Awu Pearl Thusi has competition.” (You're beautiful. )
People change hey, who would’ve thought Nellywould
look like this.
Rosy cheeks? Check…
Pouty lips? Check…
Mouth-watering hips? Check…
Nelly: “Are you undressing me with your eyes?”
I shut my eyes and rub them before I flick them open,she is
still beautiful. How did Bhekifa let this womango? Oh yes…
we pushed her away. The things we do for money.
Me: “Mina? Undress? Wena? Habe…” (Me? Undress
you?)
Okay, I sound drunk. This time I admit that I am
wasted. To hell with it, God has finally heard my
prayers. Mariam has departed, I am officially a
house owner. Let me celebrate.
Nelly: “Walk away Sabelo, I have nothing to say toyou.”
People with money think they sleep next to Jesusand use
us as pillows. The audacity Nelly has to
speak to me with such rudeness.Me:
“But I am not done with you.”
I am in the mood to spoil someone’s day and my
brother pisses me off. Why not tell on him?

Nelly: “Excuse me?”

You’re excused mamasita… Meow… Dammit her
confidence makes her look hot, fire on fire I tell you.
Me: “How are my nephews and niece Nelly-licious?”
She squints her eyes before rolling them, God shouldnot
have given women eyes. Look what they do withthem…the
most useless thing.
Nelly: “None of your business.”
Oh! And she snaps like a tiger? Damn mommy got
source.
Me: “Come on Nelisto, I’m a worried uncle that’s all. Ibet
they miss their father.”
That’s right Nelly, widen those big eyes for me. Mydrunk
eyes are seeing true beauty, Lord come
witness this.
Nelly: “Sabelo, if you have something to say, then sayit
and stop wasting my time.”

Maybe this is the type of woman I want, one who knows

how to take charge and speak her mind. Roseis like
spaghetti, she is too soft man. I’m tired of herweak ass.
Me: “I know why my dear brother has neglected his
kids.”
Now she looks interested, I scan the area. Bhekifa is
oblivious of this conversation, his focus is on the stupid
idiots we call cousins and uncles. Can you imagine I had
to buy four loafs of bread this morningbecause they eat
like cave men. Bread is expensive,people are just cruel.
Nelly heaves a sigh, it is loud enough to snap meback
to her. I find her rolling those big eyes againand all I
want to do is take a picture, I hear it lastslonger.
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Nelly: “I’m waiting bhuti.” (Brother.)

Brother-zoned? I refuse.
Me: “I am not your brother Neliza, haibo! You wishTKZ
was as handsome as me.”
Nelly: “TKZ?”
I’m confusing her.
Me: “Thok’zisto, the sangoma who looks like a
machine killer.”
Nelly: “Why am I even giving you the time of day?”
She turns to walk away, I can’t let her do that. I
haven’t spoiled my brother’s day yet.
Me: “There’s a woman by the name of Cheryl, she isthe
reason your kids have an absent father.”
Bomb dropped, let the games begin.
Nelly freezes on the spot, slowly she turns to face me. Her
eyes drowning in disbelief, I smile in return.
Me: “Unfortunately, my brother is so whipped that he
has forgotten that he ever got you pregnant.”
I should be dancing on the rooftop for my achievement.
Nelly fixes her fierce gaze on Bhekifa,she sashays past
me. I turn just to watch her jaw dropping hips sway from
left to right as she confidently approaches my senseless
brother underthe tree.
She greets the uncles with respect, bowing her heada
little. Her knees bend a little as well. Men are stupid, look
at them, smiling at her like she is swimming naked in a
pool of Savannah. Nelly says something to Bhekifa who
nods. He stands and follows her into the house.
I can’t miss this show, so I hurry behind, careful theydon’t
see me.

-NELLY PAGE.

My parents said I had to attend Mariam’s funeral

because I am still considered the daughter in-law ofthis
family. I don’t know how that is possible, the attachment
I have with Bhekifa is the reason I am here. Our
Children.
They didn’t know how to feel nor act when I announced
that their paternal grandmother has passed away. They
didn’t have that close knit relationship, Mariam is to
blame for that. She wasnot fond of me and took it out on
the children.

Victor being the eldest came with, Ayanda is too fragile. I

didn’t know what state Bhekifa would be in, if he was
going to be cold towards the kids or embrace them. So I
had to leave Ayanda behind, theother two boys were not
so keen on coming. Said something about not knowing
who Mariam is. I don’tblame them.
Victor spotted his father before we went to the graveyard
and he didn’t bother to try and approach him, right now he
is in the car waiting for me to drive us back home. Bhekifa
is a useless excuse of a man.
The plan was not to confront Bhekifa about his
negligence, I was at least going to let him figure it out; for
lack of a better word. Now Sabelo tells methe reason
behind him neglecting the children he fathered.
How dare he do that to my kids? I will not sit back and
watch them suffer, his foolishness has to stop. Idon’t want
my children to have daddy issues, Ayandais already
treading that path. It will affect her when she grows up
and finds someone to love. I can’t have my baby looking
to other men for love her father couldn’t give her.

Sabelo’s children’s room is the only private room I

could think of, the house is crowded with annoying
family members who keep asking me why Bhekifaand I
got a divorce. I was ready to go home when Sabelo
approached me and mockingly snitched onhis brother.
Confusion is laced on Bhekifa’s face as he walks into
the bedroom, he shuts the door and I can’t waitbut snap
at him.

Me: “A woman Bhekifa? You neglected your children

because of a woman?”
Bhekifa: “What are you talking about Nelly?”
Me: “Your brother just told me why you have kept
yourself away from the kids.”
He sighs in frustration, right now he is frustrating me.
Everything about him gets on my nerves.
Bhekifa: “Since when do you believe everythingSabelo
says?”
Me: “Don’t ask me that, it is irrelevant. You know I
waited Bhekifa, thinking you will wake up one day and
realise your mistakes. I didn’t want to confrontyou, but
after what I just heard.”
Bhekifa: “Well, then maybe you should stop
gossiping with my brother and ask me directly.”
He has no right to be angry with me, I didn’t do
anything wrong. He’s the one on the hot seat.Me:
“Fine.”
Crossing my arms on my chest, I take two stepsback
while intensely looking up at him.
Me: “Kindly tell me, Bhekifa. Why have you desertedyour
kids?”
I wait for an answer, it’s not coming. His eyes are
roaming, looking for god-knows what. I can’t deal with
this man, so much beard, yet he is as childishas a
toddler. I am going to explode with anger.
Me: “You have got to be kidding me, you can’t evenprovide
me with an answer.”
Bhekifa: “What do you want from me, Nelly?”
He shouts above a whisper, I am not afraid of hisroars
anymore.
Me: “Care for your children Bhekifa, they need you
dammit.”
Bhekifa: “I will… I… I love my kids.”
Manna might as well fall from heaven in this day and
age, this man thinks I am stupid.

Me: “You have a very funny way of showing it. You

can’t fool me, Bhekifa Zulu. Those days are long gone,
you don’t have it in you to be a good father.”
He’s fuming, I see it in his flaring nose. The blaze inhis
eyes and puckered brow.
Bhekifa: “Do not judge my parenting.”
He nips through gritted teeth, he can bark for all Icare. I
will not back down.
Me: “I am stating the facts, what I have observed forthe
past years. Right now your son is in the car impatiently
waiting for me to take him home. Not once did you try to
approach him, do you know whatthat will do to him?”
Bhekifa: “Fine Nelly, I will take them this comingweekend.”
That is not enough.
Me: “Don’t come into their lives only to leave again, Iwill
not have you break my kids Bhekifa.”
Bhekifa: “Didn’t I say I will take them this coming
weekend? Stop nagging me already, you are not mywife
anymore, remember?”
What did I say about him being childish? Smart
people are stupid in a way.
Me: “Okay, I won’t tell them anything. Just in caseyou
change your mind. I hope that woman is worthyou
leaving your kids behind.”

Bhekifa nods, I find it strange that he is cooperatingwith

me. I observe his face, his head is spinning withquestions.
He wants to say something.
Bhekifa: “How have you been?”
Me: “I’m alive, aren’t I?”
Bhekifa: “You’re glowing I see, your lover is doing agood
job.”
I don’t know what he means by that and I don’t careto
ask. With a tongue click, I manoeuvre past him toopen
the door. Sabelo falls face down in the door way, the
idiot was eavesdropping.
Sabelo: “Sorry, I lost my earring.”
He says, scanning the floor. The man does not wearearrings,
I am getting out of here.
“Really bafo?”
I hear Bhekifa say before I am out of hearing range.This
family is too much, really.

cm®
To be continued©
THIRTY EIGHT.

NELLY PAGE.

“Are you okay?”

The question is directed to Victor, he hasn’t said aword
since we left the Zulu residence. His jaw is clenched and
face scrunched up in anger.
Me: “Victor, I’m talking to you.”
He’s looking out the window, arms folded across hischest. I
think of driving us to a nearby eatery, so wecan talk. The
problem is that Victor is not easily pleased, he holds on to
anger longer than anyone I know.
Victor: “I hate him.”
He grunts, anger evident in his voice. This is what Ifeared
all along.
Me: “We spoke about this Vic, he is…”
Victor: “That man is not my father, I hate him.”
The child bangs a fist on the car dashboard, I havenever
seen him this angry.
Me: “Victor…”
Victor: “Mom please, I am not a kid anymore. Youcan’t
manipulate me like you do Ayanda.”
I would excuse the rude tone, but letting it go wouldgive him
a chance to repeat this mistake.
Me: “Are you talking to me like that young man?”
He sighs and goes back to looking out the window.How
on earth am I going to fix this?
Me: “Look, I understand your frustrations, okay? Butthat
does not give you a ticket to disrespect me, do you
understand?”
I hate unruly kids.
Me: “I am talking you young man.”
Victor: “Yes mom.””
He breathes frustratingly, chiding him is proving tobe a
failure.
Victor: “What did we ever do to him? Why does he
hate us so much?”
Me: “Your father does not hate you.”
Victor: “I wish I never went to the stupid funeral, Iwish
it was him who died.”
Me: “Victor that’s enough, he might be failing you,but
he is still your father. I’m not justifying his actions,
you guys need to hold on. Your father willcome around
one of these days.”
I wish to tell him what Bhekifa said, but that wouldbe a
wrong move. I don’t trust Bhekifa, his word means
nothing until he actually makes a move.

Victor: “Why are you taking his side? He never

treated you well mom, he beat you up. You were
nothing but a slave to him.”
I don’t remember shouting at my parents, this
generation is so disrespectful.
Me: “What did I say about respect?”
Victor: “I just want you to stop taking his side, be onmine
for once.”
Me: “Baby, I am on your side.””
Victor: “No you’re not. You are more worried about
Bhekifa than you are about how I feel. I need to ventto
someone, I need someone to listen to me complain about
my father.”
Thank God we’re home.
Me: “Can’t you complain without cursing him.”
I ask while parking the car in front of the garage door.
Victor: “Aaaahhh!”
I am taken aback when Victor screams in frustration.Victor:
“I hate Bhekifa, I hate my life and I hate you.” Me:
“Victor.”
Victor: “I just want to die.”
He murmurs looking into my eyes, the tears and anger
in his eyes are heart breaking, it is too late tostop him
when he stomps out of the car and runs into the house.
Me: “Victor wait.”
What have I done?

Me: “Hey, you’re home?”

Nkateko kisses my cheek before closing the door, hemust
have seen Victor judging by the look on his face.
Nkateko: “What happened? Why is Victor crying?”
Me: “Bhekifa hardly said a word to him at the
funeral.”
He leads me to the living room, his hand playing onthe
small of my back.
Nkateko: “I’ll speak to him, let me please.”
Me: “No let him cool off first. He won’t hear a word ifhe
is still upset, Victor can’t control his anger and I am
afraid that he will do something stupid one day.”
Nkateko: “He’s a needy child Nelly, teenage boys need
their father in their lives. He will start questioning himself.
Is he not good enough? Did he do something wrong? It
will eventually lead to self- hate. Things are getting out of
hand, it needs to stop.
How long is Bhekifa going to keep this up?”

I wish I had all the answers, feeling tired and drained,I

throw myself on the couch to have Nkateko settle beside
me.
Me: “I spoke to Bhekifa, he said he will fetch them. I
don’t know how accurate that is, he is not a man thatkeeps
his promises.”
Nkateko: “Well, he needs to step up. I would take hisplace
if it were possible, but the kids know him as their father.”
Me: “You have been more of a father to them thanBhekifa
ever was, thank you Nkateko.”
Nkateko: “You don’t need to thank me Nkatanga,they
are the best part of you. How can I not lovethem?”
Me: “Why didn’t I meet you earlier in life?”
Nkateko: “I’m here now and I am never letting you
go.”
His arms feel like home, I could hide in them forever.
-BHEKIFA ZULU.

It’s a day after the funeral, life has to go on. I thoughtlong

and hard about the conversation I had with my ex-wife.
The children do not deserve what I have been doing to
them, I came close to calling them lastnight.
My pride called me bluff, it is hard to actually admitto
being an idiot. I will apologize properly when I seethem.

I’m at the hospital to see Cheryl, due to funeral

arrangements, I couldn’t visit her. I have not seen herin
three days. She smiles when I walk into her hospital room,
boy am I glad she is not upset.
Women are a special gender, anything angers them.From
a bubble gum losing its taste to the sound of the kettle
boiling.
Me: “Hey.”
I greet her with a kiss and settle on a chair.
Cheryl: “Hey, how was the funeral?”
Me: “Okay I guess.”
Cheryl: “I’m sorry I couldn’t be there.”
Me: “It’s not like you had a choice, how are youfeeling?”
She shifts uncomfortably on the bed while wincing inpain.
Cheryl: “Like I fell off a building. How long have Ibeen
here?”
Me: “About a week, they had to sedate you. You hada
fractured rib.”
Cheryl: “Does my mom know?”
Me: “No.”
Me: “Do you remember what happened?”
I’m sceptical about telling her who is behind herattack, sure
I said I will have Sabelo arrested. I’m
between a rock and a hard place now, Rose and thekids
will be left alone if Sabelo goes to jail.
Cheryl: “I was attacked.”
Me: “Did you happen to recognise them?”
She shakes her head, somehow I am glad that she didn’t
recognise my brother. This woman can spot an ant in the
ear of an elephant, that’s how smart she is. Not wanting
to dwell on the topic for too longlest she starts suspecting
something, I opt to off ramp.

Me: “I want to take the kids during school holidays.”

I am not asking for her permission, but informing her
rather since it is something that has never been done
since she moved in with me.
Cheryl: “Okay?”
That’s is a question.
Me: “I haven’t seen my children in a while, so Ithought
why not have them over for a week.”
Cheryl: “Well, why are you telling me about it?”
Me: “We live together Cheryl, of course I wouldconsult
with you first.”
Cheryl: “You don’t have to consult with me, they areyour
children. It’s your house, I have no say in it.”
I can’t read her emotions as she says this.
Me: “Also I want to take them to Sun City for a
weekend, maybe Earth and Sia would love to tag
along.”
I don’t really spend time with her kids, I feel like shitfor
having to take care of them financially and not my kids.
It’s a good thing Nelly is financially stable, Cheryl
doesn’t have much. I couldn’t watch her struggle
through life.
Cheryl: “Count them out, my mother is overprotective.She
won’t let them out of her sight, especially after what
happened to Sia.”
I saw this coming.

Me: “Maybe next time, what about you?”

Cheryl: “What about me?”
Me: “Are you coming with?”
Cheryl: “You go, I’ll visit my mother. I miss the kids, Iwant
to spend some time with them.”
Me: “Are you sure?”
Cheryl: “What is with the questions? Are you seekingfor
permission to see your children?”
Me: “Come on Cheryl, I’m just asking.”
Cheryl: “I don’t like your way of asking, you make itsound
like I forced you to neglect your kids.”
Me: “I don’t know how you feel about them, that’swhy I
asked if you would like to tag along.”
Cheryl: “Does it even matter? No offence, but you arenot
really a family man Bhekifa. Sia and Earth have seen you
once, the only thing you do is provide for them financially.
Deciding not to see your kids was adecision you made on
your own, I don’t remember being part of the meeting.”
Cheryl’s bluntness stings sometimes, I cannot fathom
where she gets the audacity to speak to me
like this. How is it that I can’t lay a finger on her?Me:
“Now you’re out of line.”
Cheryl: “I need to sleep.”
She closes her eyes, completely shutting me out. This is
my cue to leave, I’ll come back when she iscalmer.

-SABELO ZULU.

I have a confession to make, Mariam is haunting my

dreams. The woman doesn’t want to leave me in peace,
every night when I close my eyes, I see her standing in the
dark, crying. I thought demons werehaving a braai party
in hell, Mariam as the meal of the day. What is she doing
in my dreams?

We have just finished eating dinner, for a change Igot

to have a decent meal.
Me: “Thank you mabhebeza, the food was nice.”
I tell my wife as she perches herself in the couchbeside me.
Me: “When last did I eat meat? I was starting to grow
feathers from eating too much chicken feet.”
Rose: “Thanks to the funeral we are able to eat
proper food.”
Me: “It’s a good thing the family left, I thought theywould
milk us dry before leaving.”
The lights suddenly go off, just great.Me:
“Eish! Eskom.”
Rose: “It’s not Eskom Sabelo, the street lights arestill
on. There is light next door as well.”
Rose says, peeking out window. That can’t be, I always
told Mariam to get prepaid electricity. Whatis this now?
Me: “Eish! Mariam died with our electricity.”
Rose: “You better make a plan. I am not going to livein the
dark.”
Ehhh! When did this one grow wings?
Me: “What do you want me to do Rose? Borrow
electricity from next door?”
Rose: “I’m not stupid Sabelo, don’t address me likeI’m a
fool.”
Address? We speak like that now I see.
Me: “Are you sure Rose? Are you sure that you are not
stupid? Because from where I am standing I seean idiot,
you complain about not having electricity and expect me
to do something about it. Was I not here when it switched
off?”
Rose: “I don’t know why I married you Sabelo, I’m
such an idiot.”
Oh she is clever after all.
Me: “I said it first.”
Rose: “I am sick of your stupid behaviour.”
Is this Rose, raising her voice at me? I must bedreaming.
Me: “Do not talk to me like that Rose, I am yourhusband.”
Rose: “Then start acting like one.” Did
this woman just shout at me? Me: “Do
not leave your place wena…’Rose: “Or
what? What will you do?” Me: “Are
you challenging me?” Rose: “No my
dear husband.”
I will smack that sarcasm out of her.
Rose: “I am simply telling you to step up as a man and
make a plan, my children and I will not live likethis.”
Me: “You have a roof above your head, what more doyou
want woman?”
Rose: “You’re joking right?”
Me: “Unfortunately, I am not Trevor Noah.”

Rose cackles mockingly, I am shocked by her

sudden confidence.
Rose: “This is exactly what I am talking about, you’re
a joke Sabelo Zulu. You’re not serious about life, foryears
you sang about how you want your mother dead with no
plan as to how you will pay for bills.”
Me: “I had a plan Rose, Bhekifa was my plan.”
She knows nothing about life and hustling? I have aPHD
in hustling.
Rose: “Aaah!”
She falls into a series of laughter while clapping herhands
like a damn penguin. I should take a video toshow her how
stupid she looks.
Rose: “This is what I mean, I am tired. Yes there wasa time
I thought sucking Bhekifa’s wallet was a goodidea until it
backfired.”
Me: “Hee baba, hee baba… What do you want fromme
hee?”
Rose: “Get a job, man up. You have children to fendfor, my
kids will not starve because their father can’twear pants that
fit him.”

Her insult is enough to throw me up, Rose staggers

back when I take a threatening step toward her. Lether
insult me further and she will be flying out the window
without a broom.
Me: “Rose, how dare you.”
Rose: “Hai suka, I am giving you a week to get a jobor
else I will take my kids and leave you alone withyour
mother’s ghost.”
Me: “My mother’s ghost? You saw my mother’s
ghost?”
Whoever said rolling your eyes is an answer is
probably a drunkard, I hate it when women do that.
Rose: “One week Sabelo and make a plan to get thelights
back. Now go wash the dishes, I’m going to bed.”
Rose pushes me aside right after snapping and strolls
away, this is not my Rose. My Rose wouldnever raise
her voice at me.
Me: “Rose, where did you see the ghost?”
Wait! What? Forget Mariam the ghost, did that
woman command me to wash the dishes.
Me: “Wena Rose, do I look like your mother’swashing
machine?”
I trail her ugly steps, she will know me today.

cm®
To be continued©
THIRTY NINE.

NELLY PAGE…

Days have turned into gloomy weeks for my kids, Bhekifa

hasn’t tried to make any form of contact. The last I heard
from him was when he called to tellme he will take them
for the school holidays and forthe life of me I cannot put
the puzzle together as towhy he can’t speak to them via
phone calls or WhatsApp.
He continues to distance himself from the kids.
Victor has become closed off, he hardly says a wordand
spends most of his time in his room. Ayanda talks back
anyhow, I have lost the strength to discipline her. Raising
kids is no child’s play, I wish Iwas warned beforehand.
This thing we call life can slap you in the face, dribble
you and toss you aside, leaving you to pick up after
yourself and start afresh.
“Nkatanga!”
Nkateko’s voice jolts me back from my wandering mind
into the dining room, I look up from the cup ofcoffee I
was lost in, to give him a subtle weak smile.His eyes
twitch with concern as he notices my depressed mood.

“I…I got this game for Victor.”

He holds me a box of the latest game Victor has been
posting on his statuses for the past weeks, Nkateko holds
on to the worried expression while waiting for an answer.
I am aware that he hates talking about Bhekifa and will
not bring the topic upeven given a chance.
He stated that Bhekifa only makes us sad and we should
avoid talking about him. It has been an impossible task, one
I have been failing every singleday. My ex-husband lives in
my mind.

Me: “You didn’t have to babe.”

He sighs to showcase his disapproval, I have also come to
know that Nkateko is a man of a few words.When it comes
to things that do not concern his feelings for me, he
doesn’t really express himself that much unless there is a
need to do so.
Nkateko: “I wanted to and so I did.”
He pulls a chair beside me, and shifts a little bit closer.
His muscular scent happily penetrates my nostrils and
that alone causes a tingling sensation inmy stomach.
Nkateko: “We might not be married, but in my heartyour
kids are mine and I want to give them the world.”
He means spoil them, two of them are already rebellious.
The only thing they deserve is a hiding.

Me: “I know, but Vic has so many games. Moreover,he

hasn’t been in his best behaviour. Giving him thiswould be
like rewarding him for his mistakes.”
The sigh again, Nkateko shuts his eyes as he
massages his temple. He seems a bit tense, he places the
game on the table… sits back and crosseshis hands.

Nkateko: “Did I ever tell you how my wife died?”

I only know he lost his wife on their honeymoon, I am
surprised he is still alive. Had I been in his position, I
would have died on the spot. I leisurely shake my head to
answer his question. His eyes are intently fixated on mine,
there is a longing in them. I also sense a need to protect
and provide.

Nkateko: “She was kidnapped, I looked everywhere for

her. I gave up my whole life to search for my wife,people
thought I was crazy, but I didn’t care, I had tofind her. By
the time I did it was too late. We found her corpse, I
wanted to die, but more than that I had a thirst for
revenge. I lost myself trying to find the people who killed
her. When I met you, I was contemplating to take my life.
I had failed her, I couldn’t live knowing that. But Nelly,
you
unknowingly brought me back to life. Somethingabout
you pulled me out of that dark hovel I had fallen into,
you saved me Nkatanga.”

I am rendered speechless, what response do you give

someone who has gone through so much in lifeand
expresses himself in a way that leaves me breathless?
Nkateko leans in and takes my hands into his, his eyes are
still kept on mine.
Nkateko: “I owe you my life Nkatanga, let me do this
please. Let me take care of you and the children, that’s
my goal in life.”
How can I deny him this right? I take up a solitarynod,
it puts a faint smile on his face. His lips meetthe back
of my hands... kisses that have shivers rippling
through me.
Me: “I’m sorry you had to go through all that.”
Nkateko shakes his head with finality, I know him
enough now that he would rather not go into further
detail. He has said what he wanted to say and this topic
will never be visited again. Warmth bubbles
through me when his hand gently slides up my cheekand he
kisses it.
Nkateko: “Now let me do all the worrying, let mecarry
all your burdens.”
Lord, that would be too much to ask.
Nkateko: “Do you trust me?”
His question comes just when I’m about to dispute, it
takes me off the line I’m travelling on and pulls intohis.
Me: “With my life.”
His eyes light up, his arms swallow me. There is
consolation in the way he holds me, a way only heknows.

Nkateko: “I’ve got you Nkatanga and I will never letyou

go.”
Nkateko whispers in my ears and I tremble a little atthe
warmth of his breath on my skin.
Nkateko: “Let’s go to bed, you’ve got work
tomorrow.”
He takes my hand and leads me to our room, perhaps it is
time I let him help, maybe things mightchange for the
good.

SABELO ZULU.

The award for the loneliest married man goes to Sabelo

Zulu, this cannot be happening to me. Rose has become
this person I cannot recognise, she talks, walks and
smells different. She has withdrawnherself from me, all
for what? Eskom? Please… I am not familiar with the
Gupta brothers, I would be richif I were. I think my wife
is possessed by my mother’s spirit, this is the only logical
explanation I can come up with.

I have spent weeks trying to figure out what her problem

is, it can’t only be that there is no electricity.
I inwardly called her bluff when she was still here after
that one week's notice she gave me… I don’t want to be
given funny looks, don’t judge me please… I tried calling
my brother for help, that big headed fool will not take my
calls. I hope the devil ispreparing the biggest fire for him
in hell, I should send more wood there. I want it as hot as
hell itself…

Bhekifa you will burn, the demons will braai you likethe
boerewors you are.

Look at this foolish woman I married, pretending to be

sleeping. I should call her parents and get two cows back
from them, their daughter thinks she paidfor her own
dowry.
Me: “Rose.”
I call her softly, I should just slap that pantyhose offher
big head. Nonsense... Rose thinks I am a fool, she is far
from dreamland. This is the same womanwho snores like
a drunkard when she is fast asleep,today she thinks she
can fool me into thinking that
she is sleeping.

Who knew sexual frustration can be frustrating? Rose and

I haven’t had sex since we buried Mariam, the woman is
cold when I touch her. As far as I know,I did not marry a
corpse. When it’s time to go to Dubai, she just lies there,
under me and lets me do all the work.
I’m up there, moaning and sweating alone, while thewitch
gives me a bored look. She doesn’t even fakean orgasm,
hell I’ll take that over her, trampling on my ego. Hey I am
a sexual man, my sex drive is highand requires me to be
with a partner who is active not a rock.

Me: “Rose, salt is killing me.”

Woman I know you are awake… her back is facing me,
the blanket is pulled up to her neck and her bodyis as stiff
as the pap she usually cooks. I extend a hand to shake her,
she knows what I want when I do this.
Me: “Rose come on, I’m dying here. You’re not cruel
enough to let me go to bed like this?”
Desperation belongs in hell, can’t believe I’m beggingmy
own wife for sex.
Rose: “Don’t you dare touch me, Sabelo Zulu.”
She spits, bitterness dripping like acid in her voice. Iknew
the witch was awake, Mariam reincarnate.
Me: “Why are you doing this to me?”
Rose: “I’m not in the mood.”
Her voice is cold and unwelcoming. Me:
“That’s what you say every night.”
Rose better not be cheating on me, I will burn heralive I
swear to God.
Me: “Is there someone else Rose? Are you cheatingon
me?”
I make sure there is conviction in my voice, I don’t
sugar-coat things. No one has time for that, I tell itlike it
is.
Me: “I asked you a question, are you sleeping
around?”
Rose jolts up from the bed, she faces me with afurrowed
brow.
Rose: “How could you ask me that?”
How could I not?
I sit up as well so we face each other man to man,since
she wants to act like a guy.
Me: “You are mine Rose, your body is mine. I saw it, I
bought it and now I own it.”

She rolls her eyes. Somebody borrow me an Okapi,there are

ugly eyes I need to pluck out.
Rose: “Oh believe me, Sabelo. If I were cheating onyou,
you would know.”
She smirks at me without a trace of humour in herface,
what in Mariam’s house is going on?
Rose: “Nonsense.”
I see, so I get Mariam’s house and Rose gets hertongue
click. Wonders shall never end… shock
swamps me when my wife leaves our bedroom andbangs
the door behind her. Where is she going to sleep? My
life cannot get any worse than this.

BHEKIFA ZULU.

Mornings tend to be depressing, for some reason my

life seems to be travelling in a path I am not
comfortable with. I can't point out what it could be,
however my heart feels heavy.
My office line rings, I told this boy I don’t want to be
disturbed. Work has been hectic lately, I had two seniors
in my team resign. Now I’m left with a wholeload of work,
H.R hasn’t found any replacements yet.

Me: “What is it? I told you not to disturb me today.”“There

is someone here to see you, sir.”
Me: “Do they have an appointment?”
“N- No sir, he says you might be interested in talking
to him. He knows your ex-wife.”
The secretary’s words throw me in a pool of
curiosity.
Me: “Name?”
“Mr. Mathebula.”
I should have known, the nerve of that man to invademy
space.
Me: “Let him in.”
I disconnect the call and wait in anticipation, two seconds
barely pass and there is a knock at my door.I sit back on
the swivel chair and shout that he comes in. Nkateko
Mathebula, funny how my enemyhas found his way to me. I
never thought I would see this day.
He takes a few steps in, shuts the door and arrogantly
makes his way towards my office desk.Our eyes do not
leave each other, we are like two bulls ready to fight
for a throne.
Nkateko: “Zulu.”
A cold smirk is drawn on his lips as he stabs
daggers at me.
Me: “Mathebula.”
I return the indifference with a deadpan voice, my mind
cannot fathom what he must be doing here. The fact that
he stands in my office with his hands arrogantly shoved in
the pockets of his pants pissesme off, I will not stand such
impudence.

SABELO ZULU.

Musa Mseleku must be my twin, the man was clever

enough to get himself more than one wife. I had that
thought before I married Rose and I have no idea how I
decided to stick to one woman. Today I am paying for my
stupidity, the woman I call my wife hasjust tossed a plate
of shit in front of me. Jesus himself would dismiss this
abomination.

Me: “What’s going on?”

She gives me a confused look while settling down on
the opposite chair, Rose is good at pretending.Rose:
“What do you mean?”
Me: “Don’t act stupid, what is this on my plate?”
Rose: “Bread and peanut butter.”
Me: “Bread and peanut butter, Rose? You have the liver
to open your mouth and say this to me. A wholeinsult
Rose?”
Rose: “You asked what it is and I told you the truth
hau.”
Me: “Why am I eating bread and peanut butter for
breakfast? How will this thing pass down my throat?Do
you know this is murder Rose? Are you trying to kill
me?”
Rose: “What are you talking about? What murder?”
Me: “Yey mfazi (woman) I said this is murder man. Do
you know how dry this thing is? Okay I see, this isyour
plan. You want to kill me because you found someone,
didn’t you Rose?”
Rose: “Oh please Sabelo, the reason you are havingbread
with peanut butter is because there is no
electricity.”
Argh! That again…
Me: “That is no excuse, you’re a woman. Couldn’tyou
set a fire outside and made me a full English
breakfast.”
She laughs, this woman’s new found bravery irks me.

Rose: “I would go that far if you would pick up yoursocks

and get a dam job.”
Wow… I called it… my wife has been possessed bymy
mother’s demon.
Me: “A damn what? Is this how you talk to me now?”
Rose: “What? You thought I would be your slave until
when? I am not the idiot you and your mother thought I
was.”
Me: “Oh I see, so I have been sleeping with a snakeall
this while. Umamlambo Rose, scratch that… so itwas you
who gave Eve the forbidden fruit. Bawo!
What have I gotten myself into?”
Rose: “You can insult me all you want, I don’t care.
Ok’salayo you have to get a job. I’m not playing withyou,
Sabelo.”
Says the woman who is still here after weeks ofliving in
darkness.
Me: “I don’t do games Rose and I don’t like your tone.I
will smack that ring out of your finger.”
She snatches my plate and throws the food in thebin
along with the plate.
Rose: “Make your own food, useless man.”
She clicks her tongue again, I am losing my mind. My
jaw drops as I watch her confidently walk out ofthe
house, I need to do something. Rose is slippingout of my
hands.
To be continued©

Dear readers, the previous chapter was about the

Easter Challenge.
Sorry to those who were confused.
"FORTY"

CHERYL ZIKHALI.

Sabelo has been ringing the doorbell for the pasttwenty

minutes, I would have opened for him if Iwasn’t enjoying
the desperate look on his face.
Perhaps I should see what brings him to his brother's
house, poor guy is tanned from standingunder the sun. I
meet his angry eyes as I open thedoor and the urge to
grin wins over my humanity.

Me: “Well, well, well. Look what the devil dragged in.”
Sabelo: “I want to see my brother.”
Me: “Just like that? No hi Cheryl… How did you
survive the attack Cheryl?”
I throw the shocking news at him and get just the
reaction I projected, he looks like a deer caught in
headlights.
Sabelo: “W- Why would I ask you that? I don’t care
about you, woman I don’t even know you.”
His words throw me into a fit of laughter, SabeloZulu is
one interesting man.
Me: “How does it feel to be half a man Sabelo? Do you
even sleep well at night, knowing you ambusheda
defenceless woman and left her to die?”
Sabelo: “What are you talking about? Have you lost
your mind?”
I knew a coward like him would deny everything.
Me: “I recognised your voice that day, you know? Youwere
there Sabelo, you and your friends cornered a helpless
woman. I should get you arrested.”
Sabelo: “Then go ahead, what proof do you have?”
Me: “Oh sir, I’m a woman. That is all the proof I need,but
don’t stress. I am not as cruel as your dead mother, believe
it or not, I have a heart. I had to lie toyour brother and
pretend that I didn’t know who my attackers were.”
Sabelo sneeringly scoffs, the bastard should be
worshiping the ground I walk on.
Sabelo: “So, what do you want from me? A star? I’mnot
going to thank you Cheryl, you stole my brother from us.”
He’s a funny guy.
Me: “I stole your brother, or your source of income?”
Sabelo is stung by the words that happily leave my
mouth, he’s not as daunting as he was when his mother
was around.
Sabelo: “Tell my brother I want to see him, he is nottaking
my calls.”
Me: “Bhekifa will never take your calls, even if youwere
dying. You’re useless to him.”
Sabelo: “Yey wena, I said call my brother now.”
Dogs with no teeth are the ones that bark the most, Idon’t
appreciate him raising his voice at me.
Me: “Nc nc nc, calm down spot. You might choke onyour
own spit, we don’t want you following mommynow, do
we?”
He takes steps closer, his bloodshot eyes are emotionless.
The look sends cold shivers down myspine. He reeks of
alcohol, as if he has been swimming in a bottle of beer. I
swallow a large lumpdown my throat and step away from
him.
Sabelo: “One day is one day Cheryl, you are going topay for
this. I swear on my mother’s grave, you are going to pay for
this. Listen to me, you bitch. Makesure you sleep with one
eye open, I am coming for you.”
He shouts as he pushes me back, causing me to
stagger a few steps.
Sabelo: “I am coming for you Cheryl, and you won’tknow
when I hit.”

My heart responds to the call of fear. I open my mouth to

speak, but the deadly look he gives me pushes the words
back. I breathe a sigh of relief when he marches out of the
compound, the bastardleaves the gate open. What the hell
was that about?
-BHEKIFA ZULU.

His eyes roam around my office, there is arrogancein the

way he observes the space, a mocking expression on his
face.
Me: “To what do I owe this visit?”
He glares with a raised eyebrow, before smirking.
Nkateko: “I came to see how a small boy is coping ina big
man’s world.”
His eyes rise and fall on my build, as he disgustinglyglares
at me.
Me: “Excuse me?”
Nketeko: “Oh look, you’re even wearing a big man’sshoes.”
Me: “Who do you think you are?”
Nkateko: “I am Nelly’s protector.”
He cuts my speech short, I see how his jaw clenchesin a
manly manner. I refuse to be intimidated by the likes of
this jerk. His answer has me laughing softly
with a hint of mockery in my voice.
Me: “I see, so my ex-wife sent you here.”
I put emphasis on ‘my’ to have him raise his eyebrowagain.
I wonder how far they can go, he seems to bethe daunting
type. I am not fazed nor am I dazed by his demeanour.
Nkateko: “Unlike you, Zulu I don’t hide behind skirts.”
I could kill this bastard... I hardly take offence. But with
the way this man is going, I could be swimmingin it
seconds.
Me: “Are you insulting me, Mathebula?”
He shakes his head, I haven’t met anyone as
annoying as this man who is dauntingly standing
before me.
Nkateko: “Just stating facts Zulu.”
He grits his teeth as he spits venom in my face, Godhelp me
if I do not kill this son of a gun.

Me: “Why are you here?”

Nkateko: “To talk, man to… boy.”
That’s it, I won’t stand here and take his insults. To hell
with what happens next, I grab him by his fancyshirt and
pin him on the wall. He doesn’t flinch nor does he show
any fear. He is audacious and uncanny, the stance he
holds has me feeling weak;like I am not man enough.
Me: “Wipe that grin off your face Mathebula, I am notone to
mess with.”
I growl like an angry animal, Mathebula remains
unshaken.
Nkateko: “I guess we have something in commonZulu,
I too am not one to mess with. My family ishurting
because of you.”
The last line surges out of his mouth in bolts of anger,
he pushes me hard enough for my feet to embarrass me.
I manage to stop myself from stumbling back, with fire
in my eyes, I scowl at theman threatening my manhood.
He stands with straight shoulders, a clamped jaw and
puckered brows.
I have to compose myself, lest he sees that his
disgusting presence suddenly intimidates the shitout of
me.
Me: “I do not know your family Mathebula.”
He better not be talking about my kids. A smirk cracks on
his lips. He tilts his head as he scrutinisesme under his
blazing gaze.
Nkateko: “Of course I would expect this from you.”
The tone of his voice mocks me, I fight the urge toretaliate.
Nkateko: “Is this why you haven’t been to see your
children? You have forgotten that you’re a father
Zulu? A man your age? How embarrassing.”
Me: “Do you have a death wish Mathebula? How
dare you claim my children as your own.”

Exasperation washes over me, it has me yelling at him.

Anger decides to badge in and that pushes meto the limit
that I smash my hands on his chest.
Nkateko tumbles a step back, his frowns… almost
sending me to the grave with a deadly glare, probably
lent it from the devil on his way here.
Nkateko: “I didn’t claim anyone Zulu, those kids do not
have a father. I stepped in, unfortunately, you have been
imprinted in their hearts. If I could, I swearto my
ancestors, I would rip you out of their hearts.”
Me: “Is that why you’re with my wife?”
He chuckles coldly and regards me with a glare thatdubs
me stupid.
Nkateko: “Now, who is claiming? Nelly is not your
wife.”
If there is anything I hate, is someone raising their voice at
me… I get into his personal space, ready foranything he
might bring to the table.
Me: “Nelly is
my…”Nkateko:
“Nelly…”
His voice rises above mine as he interjects.
Nkateko: “… is nothing to you. You gave up on herand
the children, do you remember that Bhekifa?”
He’s pushing me back as he yells in my face, I don’tknow
why I haven’t punched the living daylights outof him.
Nkateko: “You’re a coward, what kind of man
neglects his children?”
Me: “You know nothing about me.”
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Words of anger leave my mouth, a bitter taste remains in

my tongue. I hate to admit that he is right.
Nkateko: “You’re right, however, I know that you are the
only father those kids know. I know that they aresuffering
without you. They blame themselves for you abandoning
them. You’re not there Zulu, I’m theone who has to wipe
their tears. I’m the one who deals with their tantrums. I’m
the one who has to build their self-esteem and assure them
that they arenot at fault. Dammit! You're an asshole.”
Me: “Watch your words Mathebula.”
I bark to have him smirk at me with pure disgust
before chuckling in disbelief.
Nkateko: “Is that all you picked up from everything Isaid?
An insult?”
I don’t know if this man’s plan is to make me angry,if it
is then it is working.
Nkateko: “Clearly this was a waste of time, you’re fargone
Zulu and I hope by the time you decide to lookback, your
kids will still be around.”
He exclaims, disgustingly glaring at every inch that Iam. I
clench my jaw as his words hit me like pebblesof reality. I
have no come back for him. All I can entertain are
diabolical thoughts, the fact that we arebreathing the same
air.

The world is too small for both of us Mathebula, we keep on

stepping on each other’s shoes and I cannothave that.

The man regards me with one black look before hehaughtily

sashays out of my office.
I suggest you get off that high horse Mathebula,
before you come crashing down.
The words dance around my brain as I feel anger and
unfathomable hatred arouse from my deepestcore.

NELLY PAGE.

“Nkatanga.” My heart hitches at the sound of his voice,

only he can calm me down. My mind is working
overtime, wandering everywhere like a lostsoul.
Me: “Victor was involved in a fight, I’m on my way tohis
school.”
While busy at work, I received a call from Victor’s
principal. Apparently he beat some kid from his class.
What is happening to my son is above me, disciplining
him is not working either. I have thoughtof sending him to
his father, a month or two would heal his broken heart.
Victor not only resents his
father, but everyone around him.

Nkateko: “I’ll meet you there.”

Me: “It’s okay I’ve got this.”
Nkateko: “We spoke about this Nelly.”
He hardly calls me Nelly, I should stop pissing himoff.
His patience is being tested, I keep pulling hisstrings.
Me: “Okay, I’m almost there. I’ll see you just now.”
The line goes dead. That’s odd, the man didn’t bid his
goodbyes. I step on it and mentally cross my fingers not to
run into the traffic cops. Those peopleare masters in
ruining people’s days.

Finally I get to the school and park outside, the guardlets me

in after I tell him who I am. The school is pretty strict, they
don’t allow visitors during school hours.
The grounds are empty, there is not a single soul
outside. As I enter the principal’s office, my eyes collide
with Victor’s. He has a cut lip and a black eye,this boy will
drive me into an early grave. I didn’t raise him to be
violent. There’s a boy seated beside him, he is just as
bruised as my son.
“Ms. Magwaza.”
Mrs. Khanyile greets, I smile in return and shake thehand
that’s extended to me.
Me: “I am sorry about my son, ma’am.”
I chastise Victor with an icy glare while giving theprincipal
a heartfelt apology.
“Please take a sit Miss, we are waiting for Sam’sparents.
They have been informed as well.”
Sam must be the tiny timid boy seated next to Victor,he
drops his eyes when I regard him with an apologetic
stare, he looks a bit shaky. How did Victor gather the
courage to corner such a delicate petite boy? He better
not be becoming like his father,or I will thrash every Zulu
cell out of him.
Victor raises his head to see me glancing at Sam with
pity, his eyes disgustingly paint Sam from head to toe. My
son takes up a tongue click and shifts hischair away from
Sam who doesn’t bother to raise hiseyes, he is like a
puppy drenched in rain.

Me: “What happened, Mrs. Khanyile?”

The door opens just as I lay a question at the table, atall
large man walks in. His eyes immediately run to the little
boy, he hurries to him and starts inspectinghis face,
concern and care enveloping him.
“Is it painful?” A menacing baritone voice fills all
corners of the principal’s office. Sam nods, that hasthe big
man cupping his bruised face.
“I don’t want to see tears in your eyes Samuel, you’rea big
boy.”
Again Sam nods, is this how he disciplines the boy? Ican
already see my belt at home, it’s in the top drawer, ready
to taste some flesh.
I will show Victor his mother today.

The door creaks open, putting an end to my agitation,my

heart does a funny dance when Nkateko walks in.A ghost of
a smile stretches on his lips as our eyes meet, he sees
Victor and his face instantly dries up.

“Your sons were fighting in class in front of theteacher,

Victor is the one who provoked Sam.”
The principal explains after the two men have settleddown.
“We don’t condone bullying at the school, I’m sorry
ma’am, but I will have to suspend Victor.”
Victor: “That is not fair, he started it.”
Victor growls from behind us, my son has becomeinsolent,
to say the very least.
Me: “Shut up, she is not talking to you.” Victor:
“Mom, you don’t understand.” Heaven this
child you gave me is testing my
patience, if I react, you will see him sooner than you
expected.
Victor: “This faggot… has been staring at me.”
Jehovah, take the wheel. Whose child is he?
Nkateko: “Victor!”
Nkateko scolds him as he jumps to his feet, Victor isnot
fazed whatsoever. His anger does not waver, nordoes his
furrowed brow fade.
Victor: “I didn’t say anything wrong, he is gay. Let
him show you the pictures he has of me on his
phone.”
Victor is on his feet now, pointing a finger at Sam and
shouting as loud as he can. I feel like a fool and
embarrassed beyond anything. Sam’s father is composed,
not once has he turned to glance at the rude boy who has
the audacity to disrespect his son.

Victor: “I am disgusted by him and everything he is, the

way he kept looking at me in class, I let it go for months,
thinking he will stop. I’m not sorry for what I
did and I would do it again.
Why can’t he be a kid again? Why can’t he be as sweet
as caramel like his other brothers. This ninthgrader
wants to act like an adult? I will have to showhim his
place.
Me: “Victor, do you hear yourself? I want you toapologise
to Sam and his father now.”
Victor: “No!”
Did this child just… Victor needs a belt, talking to himis
like pouring water on an elephant’s back.
Khanyile: “This kind of behaviour is unacceptable.”
The principal voices and that has Victor maliciously
smirking at Sam who still refuses to face any of usin the
room.
Victor: “You see Samantha? Your behaviour is not
natural, even the principal agrees with me.”
He mocks the boy, letting me down once more. I amshook by
the arrogance in Victor’s tone.
Khanyile: “I was talking about you, Victor.”
Victor: “But I didn’t do anything.”
Me: “Will you shut up and listen? You’ve caused
enough damage already.”
“I would like to take my son, if we are done here.”
Sam’s father suggests, he has been way too quiet.He must
the kind that sways away from quarrels.
The principal nods.

There is silence as the father takes his son by thehand

and ushers him out.
Me: I promise you Mrs. Khanyile, this will not go
unpunished.”
I mean it, I don’t know my son to be homophobic. Weare all
going through something, but we don’t take itout on other
people.

cm®
To be continued©
“FORTY ONE”

NELLY PAGE.

Victor drove home with Nkateko, I would have killed him

if he travelled with me. That’s how angry I am, Ihad to
cancel my appointments for today to accommodate my
son. I got home five minutes ago,they are not here yet.
Nkateko is too much sometimes, he probably took the boy
out for ice cream. I will have to have a talk with him, he
is too soft on Victor.
That boy needs to know he was wrong, he needs tobe
punished for his bad decisions. God forbid that there
comes a time when I have to bail him out of prison.

I’m home alone, the other kids are still at school. Iwant
to tell my mother about what happened, however,
stressing my parents is not a good idea.
Impatience keeps me company as seconds turn to
minutes, before I know it, an hour has gone by.
Nkateko is not taking my calls, neither is Victor. I tried
chastising my anger and failed miserably, mythoughts
are centred on Sam. What his father mustbe feeling to
know that his son is being bullied for who he is, I would
need to properly apologize to them.

It’s not long after an hour has gone by when I hear

Nkateko’s car pull up outside, the urge to meet themhalf
way arises. But I choose to sit it out, Nkateko had asked
that I trust him, this is the test… his parenting could be
better than mine.
The front door opens, they walk in side by side. Nkateko
has his arm draped around the shamelessboy’s shoulder,
shameless because he is failing to look up at me. I rise
from my seat, my eyes meetingNkateko’s worried gaze.
I’m given a gentle smile, it’s assuring me that thingsare
okay. Not from where I am standing though, not
according to the anger inside me and the urge to thrash
that boy like the child he is. With a belt hiddenbehind me, I
call him over.

Me: “Come here.”

Victor glances at Nkateko, then back at me, hesitation
playing at his face. Nkateko nods and thisis when my son
moves, his steps are faltered, probably by the impassive
look on my face. Yeah, bevery afraid my boy. Mommy
didn’t like what you did.
Me: “What do you have to say for yourself?”
Victor: “I didn’t do anything wrong.”
Me: “Victor, I am giving you one more chance to tellme
why you beat that child up.”
Fear takes flight in his eyes, his jaw clenches and Iam
instantly reminded of his father’s rudeness.
Victor: “He started it, he thinks I’m gay mom. I hate the
way he looks at me, who knows what disgustingthings go
on in his mind when he’s looking at me or my pictures?”
Me: “Is that enough reason to beat him up? Couldn’tyou
talk to him like a civilised person and tell him how you
feel? Victor, since when are you this violentperson?”
By the look in his eyes, he is wondering what I havehidden
behind me. Boy keep provoking me and youwill just have
to find out sooner.

Victor: “I had to fight for my honour, I had to prove tomy

friends that I am not gay. Everyone knows that Sam
doesn’t have balls, he…”
The belt lands on his thigh before I know it. I grabhim as
he tries to run and trash him a few more times.
Victor: “Mom stop, stop.”
This is nothing, I’m not even exerting that much
power.
Me: “You’re a… child… and… will act… like one…”
Victor: “I’m sorry mom… I’m sorry…Please… stop.”
He cries.
Me: “You better be sorry.”
I chide the boy as I continue beating him, silent criessashay
from his mouth. He staggers back when I let go, head
dropped and hands rubbing away the pain.
Me: “You’re grounded until I’m satisfied with your
punishment. No TV, no games and no phone.”
Shock takes over his facial features, it has his eyes
widening. But he seems to be too afraid to speak out.
Me: “I want you to go to your room and think of an
apology you’re going to give Sam.”
He runs to his room, the entirety of my body bubbleswith
guilt. There’s a sting in my heart, no mother wants to
exert pain on their kids.

My eyes run to Nkateko across the room, he’s

standing with his arms across his chest. Browsraised
and a blank expression on his face.
Nevertheless, I am glad that he didn’t interfere. Victor
needed to be scolded and disciplined, it is forhis own
good.
Me: “Where did you go?”
Nkateko: “I took him out for ice cream…”
Why am I not surprised? He stands behind me, enfolds
his arms around my waist and rests his chinon my
shoulder when he sees me pouting, complaints ready to
explode from my chest.
Me: “You rewarded the boy for beating up
someone’s son?”
Nkateko: “Come on Nkatanga.”
He speaks like a child, it can only mean he knowsthat
sometimes I am not fond of his way of parenting.
Nkateko: “I saw the way you looked at him before weleft the
school, I wanted to give you time to cool off.”
Well, you’d be shocked by how upset I still am. I restrain
my thoughts, the last thing I want is to fightwith this man.
Me: “He messed up Nkateko.”
Nkateko: “I know my love, believe me, I wasn’t
rewarding him. I needed to have a word with him.”
His arms loosen around me, he takes my hand and
guides me to the couch. The clingy side of him comes to
play, I’m made to sit on his lap. His armsare back
around my waist, tightly holding me.
Nkateko knows how to play this game, the kisses he’s
placing on my neck are evidence. All the angerpasses
away, my body falls into relaxation.

Nkateko: “Victor is a teenager, their emotions are

everywhere. They feel so many things at the sametime,
it’s normal that he acts like this. You don’t discipline a
child by belting them, they become worse.”
Me: “Are you saying I shouldn’t have beat him up?”
Nkateko: “No Nkatanga, our ways of parenting are
different. You are his mother hence I didn’t stop youfrom
disciplining him, but corporal punishment should not
always be the way out. Times have changed. Victor is
sorry for what he did.”
That’s all I want. Victor should be glad Sam’s
parents are not pressing charges, at least that’s
what I hope. If they do though, I am not bailing anyone
out of prison. I don’t have money to waste.Nkateko’
arms tighten around me, his clinginess istoo much
lately.
Nkateko: “You know I didn’t get a kiss from you
today.”
He says as if he gets kisses from someone else as well, I
turn my head to find him pouting and his forehead
creased. It’s adorable and funny at the same time. I find
myself pressing my lips against his,trust Nkateko to deepen
the kiss. I know he is trying to make me forget Victor’s
disobedience.

-VICTOR.

The boy is not okay with how things have gone downfor
him, the humiliation Sam caused him cannot be forgiven
so easily. As he lays in bed, the pain from his mother’s
belt reminding him of what Sam has put him through;
Victor can only think diabolical thoughts.
Fifteen and too tall for his age, Victor has always been
the heartthrob at his school. His physique gothim
attention from both boys and girls, Victor onlypaying
attention to the girls. Is it too soon to say heis his father’s
son?

Sam came like an unexpected hurricane, it was during a

free period in class when a friend of Victorspotted Sam
adorably admiring Bhekifa’s first born.

“Hey Sam.” Victor’s friend called, his voice so loudthat

the entire class fell into utter silence. Sam inquisitively
turned his eyes towards the boy.
“Like what you see?” The boy continued with what his
mind was withholding, throwing Sam into a seatof
confusion. The class immediately understood what the
drama was about as they had caught Samstaring at the
Zulu boy countless times before. Theclass burst into
laughter. Sam could only look away,but as he did that, his
eyes met Victor’s and that’s
when Sam turned beet red.
The sight of Sam blushing aggravated Victor who
always suspected Sam being gay, Victor was low key
disgusted by him as well.
Poor Sam was oblivious to what he was doing, he
didn’t plan to glance at Victor. His eyes were just
undisciplined, although Sam had tried not to stare,he
would find himself staring.

“Victor, you have an admirer boy. Have you seen the

pictures he has of you on his phone?” His friend teased and
that only fuelled Victor’s anger.
“I bet he kisses them before going to bed at night.”
Another one of Victor’s friends joined in, they became
class clowns. The noise was a norm for theteacher, hence
his silence.

Victor though, hated being the centre of attention,but

mostly he is not a fan of homosexuals. He andhis friends
found it rather unnatural, it angered him
that Sam had the nerve to adore him. To gain his dignity
back, Victor found a need to retaliate. In a fitof rage, he
kicked his chair and marched towards Sam. He tackled
the boy who didn’t see him coming,the class screamed in
excitement as witnessing a fight riled them up like a
toddler high on sugar.
Sam did not have the strength to fight the big boy who had
straddled him, the punches fell on Sam’s face like
hailstones. The only defence Sam knew was covering his
face, but that didn’t seem to get Victor to stop. The small
boy swung his hands, hoping to maybe hit the target.
That’s when he punched Victor’s eye and elbowed his lip,
the fight was stopped by two teachers who pulled Victor
froman injured Sam.

The memory is still fresh in Victor’s head, he hates that

his mother didn’t give him a chance to explain.Anger
doesn’t begin to describe what he feels, the teenage boy
is angry at the world… his parents… andSam for
humiliating him.
That’s what his ignorant mind has convinced him, hedid not
bother to investigate Sam’s side of the story, but rather
acted like a hooligan.

Victor’s phone buzzes from under his pillow, he sends

his hand to fish for it. Thinking he won’t haveaccess to
his phone anymore is infuriating, his mother lives up to
her promises. She will confiscatehis favourite gadget…
Calm down Victor, surely youcan survive without a
mobile.

“I heard you got suspended, sorry boy.” A text reads,it is

from the same friend who started the whole mess.
“Yeah, I hate my life.” That’s Victor’s response.
No, there is no way he will tell his friend that hismother
showed him flames.
“You can’t let this go Vic, you need to do somethingabout
that faggot.” The friend texts back, planting inhumane
thoughts in Victor’s head. Victor loves
what his mind has just relayed to him, he smirks atthe
idea.

That is quite an evil smirk for a fifteen year old, don’tyou

think Vic?

“I have a plan.” Victor nods in satisfaction as he presses

send… This is going to be fun... he thinks tohimself.

cm®
To be continued©
“FORTY TWO”

VICTOR.

It’s a month after the school incident, a month after

Victor was suspended… a month after his supposed
humiliation, a month after his mother embarrassedhim in
front of the man he has grown to adore as a father; and
Victor has not healed. His raging heart still yearns for
revenge, the boy is restless and he ismost certain that the
only way he will be at ease is when he has tasted the
sweetness of revenge.
His plan is in motion as of the moment, his naïve teenage;
pea sized brain has convinced him that thisis the right
thing to do, he is convinced that everything will go back to
normal after.

Being grounded is not fun, lil Vicky is bored to sin. The

walls of his room seem to be closing in on him,he is not
allowed to go anywhere. The only time he
goes out of his room is during breakfast, lunch and
supper. His siblings try to cheer their big brother up by
visiting him in his room, but grumpy Zulu is neverup for
company. He shoos his siblings away as if they are mere
flies.
The disrespect of treating your blood like they havebeen
feasting in sh’t.
Spare the rod, spoil a child; years later and this proverb is
working wonders, it is too late to bend thischild. It is hard as
a rock and stubborn as a mull.

Something buzzes from under Victor’s pillow, he jumps

from his back and immediately snatches thedevice. Yes,
the young lad has a cell phone; thanks to his little
brother who lent him his phone withouttheir mother’s
knowledge.

“Love, are you there.” his eyes read the WhatsApptext...

Victor grins in annoyance, it is followed by an
arrogant huff. He glares at his phone, clicks his
tongue and throws the phone on the bed before laying
back down. He is in no mood to respond tothis person.

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It’s been a month since he approached Sam on line.Let’s

not get overexcited just yet. Victor is catfishingthe poor
boy. Goes by a different name and sent reticent Sam
pictures of someone else. The duo have been chatting day
and night, confessed love to each other. Oh, how gullible
can teenagers be?
Victor’s heart is not in any of this, this is a wickedplan
to get what he wants.
Selfish little sh’t.

Victor jumps from the bed, growling in annoyance and

stomps his foot a couple of times on the floor when his
phone notifies for the second time. Funnyhow he can’t
help himself, curiosity is always closeby, compelling him
to open the text.
“Love, I miss you. Please talk to me, we haven’t spoken the
whole day.” Victor rolls his eyes after
reading the message, he is disgusted with himself for
entertaining Sam’s longing heart but mostly, withSam for
finding males attractive. He takes a deep breath to grace
himself before replying to the text.
“Sorry love, I had a busy day today.” Victor’s fingers
heavily type more lies as they have been doing thepast
weeks.
The two chat back and forth, they agree to meet thisvery
night, even if it is just for a second. One party isexcited
while the other grows anxious, revenge calling out his
name. Like he has been doing every day since the love
affair began, Victor takes a screenshot of their chats and
sends them to the group chathis friends opened. The boys
share series of laughs,all in Sam’s expense.

“Let the games begin.” Bhekifa’s son whispers to

himself, a smirk he inherited from the devil, playingat
his lips.

******
Time seems to be going slow for Sam, counting theminutes
is not working for him. He is glad though that Stephen has
been keeping him company. Samhasn’t told anyone about
the boy he met on line, Stephen Tsilo. The boy who has
won his heart in a space of a month.
“Baby get off your phone, food is ready.”
A female voice calls from behind his bedroom door,Sam is
so engrossed on his phone that he has become oblivious to
his surroundings.
“Samuel.”
A woman peeks through the door, her brows knit atthe
sight of her son laying on the bed and blushing at the
phone in his hand. He is typing so fast a
network engineer would have a hard time keeping up.
“Yes mom.” Sam says as he briefly lifts his headfrom
the pillow.
“Dinner is ready, come and eat.”
“I’m not hungry yet mom.”
Oh Sammy, didn’t mommy teach you to sit up whenadults
are talking to you?
Mom finds it hopeless in arguing with her son, so she
turns to walk out. But Sam calls her before shecloses the
door.

“Mom, can I go out for a few minutes?”

“It’s late baby.” She is not okay with this, kids go missing
every day. Although Sam is in the ninth grade, he is still
her son and mothers tend to be veryprotective of their
sons.
“Please mom, I promised Naledi I will accompanyher to
buy kota.” (Bunny chow)
Sam sits up from the bed, he gives his mother his famous
puppy eyes and a little pout. There is no wayshe can say
no to that look, besides, it’s barely 8pm, streets are
probably buzzing with people. Naledi is achildhood
friend, a good girl. She and Sam have done this before,
gallivanted around the neighbourhood at night.
Sam’s mother gives in, nodding to the request. Shegives
an excited Sam a curfew before walking out.The timid
boy’s heart is leaping with joy, he will finally meet his
Stephen. The one he calls love.

-NELLY PAGE

“Mom wake up.”

Ayanda almost gives me a fright, shaking me back tothe
real world. She is standing in the dark, her face unclear
under the dimmed room. I turn the side lampon to find my
baby in tears, the light is enough to wake Nkateko.
Me: “What happened baby? Why are you crying?”
She sits on the edge of the bed and I pull her closerto
comfort her.
Ayanda: “Victor is not home, I saw him leave the house
when I was going to the bathroom. He saidnot to tell
you, but I’m scared. I think he is going todo something
bad.”
How did I not see this? He was doing so well. Panictakes
over, it’s so late at night. Where could Victor have possibly
gone?
Nkateko: “Did he say something to you?”
I’m on my feet changing into comfortable clotheswhen
Nkateko questions Ayanda, his worried gaze
occasionally runs to me.
Ayanda: “I heard him talking about someone, he saidthey
don’t deserve to breathe the same air as him.”
Nkateko: “Okay my love, thank you for letting us know.
We’re going to look for your brother, okay?”
Ayanda nods, wiping her tears away.
Me: “Go back to bed baby, I’ll wake you up when your
brother gets here.”

The moment she walks out, a heavy sigh bubbles out of

my mouth. I am exhausted, I have run out of ways to
discipline Victor. He should set a good example for his
siblings, but he chooses to becomea nuisance.
My eyes follow Nkateko as he hurries to the closet, he
picks out a pair of olive green track pants and amatching
jersey. Worry displayed on his face.

Me: “Where could he have gone at this time?”

Nkateko: “He could be with friends, boys his age…”
Me: “I don’t want to hear it Nkateko, enough makingexcuses
for that boy.”
My voice is finger pointing, I don’t mean to. Then again,
Victor has gotten away with so much and thepath he is
taking will lead him to nothing but distraction.
Nkateko: “That’s not what I’m doing Nkatanga, you need
to calm down. I doubt Victor would try anythingstupid.”
Me: “I hope you’re right, or else I won’t spare him this
time.”
Nkateko vows silence, I follow him to the car. I don’tknow
where we are going to start, maybe we will spot Victor
while driving around. If I knew his friends,
I would call them.

*****

“Meet me at the school hall” That’s what the

message had said.

Sam is right on time. His stomach is in knots, palmssweaty

and heart drumming against his ribcage.
Breaking the rules is not something he would do, hehas
always been a good boy both at school and at home. What
the heck? Breaking the rules for love can’t be considered
a crime, right?

“Hello.” Sam calls as he walks into the empty hall, lights

are out. His eyes can’t see much. Fear tugs athis heart,
something suddenly doesn’t feel right.
However Sam can’t conjure up the courage to turn
around and leave, his mind and heart wrestle, he is
caught in the middle.
He is conflicted, he wants to meet the young man who
captured his heart in this little space of time. Also, he
wants to be home, safe under his parent’s wings. His feet
have not dared to move, he stands rigid, waiting for
whatever. Stephen would never lie to him, Sam believes
that much. The mysterious Stephen managed to creep his
way into Sam’s heart.

A blue light goes on, revealing a romantic dinner setting

in the middle of the spacious hall. Sam’s eyes twinkle with
wonder and pure joy, he knows thisis Stephen’s hand.
From Sam’s knowledge, Stephenis a romantic.
A shadow of a tall figure emerges from a corner, causing
Sam’s eyes to stand at attention and his ears perk up for
any possible sounds lest the personis not who he’s
meeting. Not that he would point himout in the dark.
“Stephen?” Sam is the first to speak as the tall figureslowly
approaches, he is tall and big boned… Sam’s type, he is
perfect. From a distance, Sam can see the
person is wearing a black masquerade (theatrical mask).
His lips and eyes are the only thing on show.
“Love.” The person replies as soon as he is at earshot,
his voice is masked so perfectly that Samwould not
recognize it. Sam’s heart falls into ease,only one person
calls him love and that is his Stephen.
“Hi love, why are you wearing a mask?” Sam questions
the young man who is now towering overhim.
“I’m nervous I guess, I’m afraid you might not reallylike
me.” Ahh! The boy planned this very well, his tongue is
perfectly tamed that no trace of lies are spotted in it.
“Okay, but I’ve seen your pictures. You’re handsomelove, I
like your face.” Sam shyly retorts, eyes cast down and lips
folded in a supressed smile.
“I know, but I’m comfortable with this.” The maskedboy
gives a quick reply, Sam frowns in confusion. Hehas
waited for so long to see Stephen and now he can only a
catch half of him that’s all.
“Mmmhh.” Sam hums and pouts, it’s adorable andcute
and… gosh, Stephen almost wonders how another boy
could look so adorable.
“Tell you what?” Stephen brushes the uncomfortable
thought out of his head as he comes up with a solution to
erase possible doubt clawing at Sam’s head. “Next time, I
won’t wear a mask. I promise.” His voice is ever so soft
and soothing to Sam’s heart.
The timid boy melts and nods like a kid offered candy.
Stephen takes Sam’s hand, he can’t hide thefact that it’s
the most uncomfortable feeling he hasever known.
Regardless, he leads Sam to the table where everything
is set, from food to flowers.
Sam is smitten, whipped and mesmerised by his Stephen.
They eat while conversing, a fairy tale is how Sam would
describe this moment. Throughout the meal, his eyes
cannot help but wander to the lipsof the boy seated
opposite him. He would love to taste them, even a mere
brush would do.
It is in the blink of an eye when the tall boy plays aslow
song from his phone, he offers his hand to asmitten Sam.
“Dance with me, love.” The charming young man murmurs,
it is loud enough to send shivers down Sam’s spine. Sam
takes the hand offered to him, thetwo create their own dance
floor and begin to moveslowly to the song.
If dreams ever come true then this is one for Sam,not in
his wildest dreams did he ever think love would find
him at an early age.
Thank the heavens, thank the stars, thank the universe or
whoever is responsible for this moment.Feeling needy and
clingy, Sam moves closer and buries his head on the tall
boy’s chest.
“I’m so happy love, you make me happy. Thank youfor
this.” Sam sings, while his heart dances with joy.The boy
does not give a reply, his body tenses although his arms
are around Sam.
“I want to kiss you.” The tall boy softly declares andthat
creates butterflies in Sam’s stomach. His eyes
widen as he tries to grasp what has been said to him,
eagerly, Sam nods agreeing to the sweet request.
“Close your eyes.” Stephen orders, Sam trusts him, perhaps
with his life and so he does as he is told. A smirk plays on
Stephen’s lips. “Don’t open them okay,no matter what.”
This puts a curious smile on Sam’s lips; nevertheless,he
says, “I trust you.”

And oh boy, Stephen is happy about this.

“I’m going to let go, okay? I need you to pout for melove, I
love your pouted lips.”
Sam does as told, because love is blind and maybestupid
as well. We can go for pandemic… love is a pandemic.

Sam suddenly hears voices, but he thinks it’s in hismind,

so he lets it pass. Meanwhile, the tall boy glares at tiny
Sam who is adorably pouting at him.His hand digs in
the pocket of his jeans and comes
out with a mobile phone. He snaps Sam’s picture, anevil
smirk playing at his lips.
“Love, what’s going on?” Sam is growing impatient,
nothing has happened yet and minutes have passed.
“I’m here, just want to bask in your beauty.” Stephen rolls
his eyes after exclaiming, a giggle is heard froma distance.
Then another one, and another one. A frown builds on
Sam’s face, he can’t understand what is happening. His
eyes instantly pop open, theyare big and confused.
“What’s going on?”
The tall boy ignores Sam’s question, but rather offers
him a vicious smile that sends cold unpleasant chills
through Sam’s body. Stephen pullsthe mask off, revealing
his real identity and Sam’s world comes crashing down
at the sight of Victor Zulu standing before him.

He is not given a chance to question him because

Victor’s friends emerge from every corner, clicking
pictures of the now terrified Sam.
The phone flashes are on, the lights are blinding, depriving
Sam of a clear view. He lifts his hands overhis face to hide,
but it is futile. In Sam’s eyes, Victor seems to be the host of
the ambush as he stands while his friends take pictures and
videos of Sam.
Loud insulting laughter has filled the hall, there areso
many people Sam can’t count. Girls and boys, having a
jolly good time at his expense.

Two boys move closer and rip Sam’s shirt off, he gasps
at the sudden rough pull and more laughter isheard. Just
when Sam covers his naked upper body another boy pulls
his pants down, this time they laugh louder, making
taunting comments.
“Pause for us sis Samantha…”
“You got your mother’s hips, those definitely don’tlie.”
“Oh but you got your daddy’s flat ass, what an oddlooking
body you got Sammy.”
“That’s right Naomi Campbell, shake what your
momma gave you.”
Sam has fallen into shock, he could fight for his life. Ask
them why they are doing this, what they want from him and
probably run. But his body has taken a path of its own,
leaving him behind. He is frozen on the spot, hands
hugging his exposed frame. He feelsnumb and his heart is
shattered into a million pieces.

“I think he’s missing a weave.” Some loud short girlmocks

and pushes a curly wig on Sam’s head.
“He’s too dark, bathing with milk should help.” A boyabout
Sam’s height and structure empties a litre of milk on Sam’s
head. His eyes shut closed when theycome in contact with
the milk, he is a shivering mess.
“Guys, guys... he is too skinny, self-raising floor should
give meat to his skeletal body.” Someonepours a bag of
flour over Sam’s body.
“Eggs are good for the skin, half a dozen should do it.”
This time Victor’s closest friend, the master mindof the
terrible scene utters in a sing-song. He placesa tray of
eggs on the table, takes three in his hands
and throws them Sam.
The timid boy gasps as the eggs painfully collide with
his tiny body and crack. In one go, the gang empty all
the eggs on Sam who has lost all the strength in him.
Fear and guilt tackle Victor, they cover his face as he
realises the sin he has committed. He wants his friends
to stop, he wantsto turn back time and undo what he
has done. Oh Vicky, Vicky… It is too late for that, don’t
you think?

With the last egg thrown at him, Sam comes crashing

down with a loud thud. He neither cries nordoes he move,
shock paralysis if we could call it that.Victor’s crew is not
done with their insults and taunts, they throw tissues at
the boy laying on the cold hard ground, uncaring about
him. Like the devil has possessed them, they laugh and
make sure to capture everything on camera.

“Stop.” A whisper from Victor, but it is not heard byhis

loud friends. The Zulu boy is panicking, his body
trembling with guilt and eyes filled with unshed tears.
“Stoooop!” He shouts louder and everything comesto a
halt, they turn to him as if he is their leader.
“That’s enough, enough.” His loud voice cracks, his eyes
are on Sam who is curled up on the floor trembling. The
poor boy is covered in everything thatwas thrown at him.
Victor feels like shit, he can’t take the guilt that is
swallowing him every second.
He wants to help Sam and maybe offer an apology,but
what good will that do. Victor knows he will be arrested,
the Zulu boy takes off running. His friendsfollow pursuit,
leaving a traumatised Sam helplesson the ground.

cm®
To be continued©
“FORTY THREE”

NELLY PAGE.

Time is moving at a snail’s pace and I am growing

tremendously restless, I have no idea where to startlooking
for my son. Victor’s disappearance has putme on the
verge of a mental breakdown, however, itis something I
cannot afford to do.
I want to be strong for my son, for my kids. If something has
happened to Victor, then the policewould be knocking at my
door. Right? Right?
Oh darn it, this is South Africa. Depending on the
police is like investing all your life’s savings on a
pyramid scheme.

“What if something has happened to him? I will

never forgive myself.”
My mind decides to work with my mouth and spewmy
thoughts out, Nkateko looks over me from the
driver’s seat, a single glimpse that leaves him scowling in
confusion. He is aware of the dire situation, but he would
rather take the calm route. We both cannot afford to freak
out, someone has tobe sane if we want to find Victor.

Nkateko: “Victor is fine, try not to entertain negative

thoughts Nkatanga.”
Easy for you to say, then again, Nkateko has boardedthis
train before. He knows how it feels to lose someone and
not know where they are. He has lost his mind before, he
had his heart ripped out of his chest and almost lost his
breath from fear of not knowing where the person he
loved was.
Me: “How do I do that when I don’t know where myson
is?”
Nkateko is not given a chance to respond as his
phone’s ringtone fills the car.
Nkateko: “Please get that Nkatanga.”
This man is real, he is here to shame the devil. Look
at him allowing his woman to take his calls… I reachfor
the phone on the dashboard, Victor’s number isdisplayed
on the screen. My heart makes a high jump and lands on
my throat, I take a deep breath and tilt the phone to show
Nkateko.
Nkateko: “Let me pull over.”
We can’t park on the side of the road, like I mentioned,
this is South Africa and Johannesburg isnot the safest
place in Gauteng.
Me: “No, don’t.”
Nkateko: “Put it on speaker.”

He orders, turning a corner on a dark empty street.The

skies are dark, droplets of rain have started pouring on
the wind screen.
Nkateko: “Victor.”
Nkateko is trying to stay calm.
Victor: “Are you home?”
I catch the boy’s trembling voice, shaded with fear.
Nkateko: “Where are you Vic?”
There is a prolonged silence, I’m tempted to scold Victor. I
have the right after what he has put me through. But I
choose to remain quiet, lest Victor disconnects the call
before we find out where he is.
Victor: “I’m in jail, please help me, uncle. Don’t tell
mom please.”
What the hell? Shock and fear hit me like a truck,what
kind of a test is this?
Me: “Victor, what happened? What are you doingthere?”
This is a mother’s biggest fear, but it is better than
hearing that your son has died. The line is
disconnected, Victor has not explained yet and thatonly
worries me more.

We drive to the nearest police station, Nkateko walks

ahead of me while I am numb from head to toe.
Unsettling thoughts linger in my head. There’s apolice
officer behind a desk, he gives us an
intimidating yet bored expression. The man doesn’t seem
to like his job. Nkateko and the officer exchange
pleasantries, I don’t get how he is a peopleperson and
feels a need to hold small talks with strangers.
Me: “What happened? Why are you keeping my son?”
I’m growing anxious by the second, the man frownsupon
my probing. The little smile he had when conversing
with Nkateko is gone.

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“Your son broke into the school along with a bunchof

other kids, they are all in a holding cell.”
Me: “Can I see him.”
I feel Nkateko’s hand grip my waist, he tightens thehold
and that has me calming down a bit.
“This way.”
We follow the officer down a dim corridor, my eyes
search for Victor in a cell with five boys. I see shock
envelope him as our eyes meet, his widen as big as
saucers. He glares at Nkateko, eyes filled with questions.
I know what is going through his mind,
the boy was expecting Nkateko alone.
“One more thing.”
The officer adds as he turns to face us.
“You might want to get your boy a lawyer, a kid was found
passed out in the school hall. I have no doubtthese boys
are responsible for it, none of them wantto talk. Bulling is
a serious offence, if found guilty, they will serve time.”

My ears have to be deceiving me, my baby can’t be

capable of that, I am most certain about this. Victormight
be a troublemaker, but he will never take things this far.
Victor: “What is she doing here? I asked you not totell
her.”
The little shit screams from where he is standing, hisglaring
gaze is directed towards Nkateko. There is anger and
authority in his voice, yet he is hiding behind some boy who
is almost as tall as he is, his hands gripped on the boy’s
shoulders.
Me: “Why wouldn’t I be here Victor? What have youdone
to yourself? Is this the life you want to live?”
He drops his head as shame drowns his eyes.
Me: “Look at me when I’m talking you boy and comehere.”
Trying to be strict is of no use, Victor is far gone.
Maybe I should take him to church, get him to jointhe
youth.
“You can take your son home ma’am, but of course Iwill
need a little compensation. We would hate for the boy to
spend the weekend behind bars.”
I see, now I have to bribe the law just to have my sonhome.
Me: “Let him spend the weekend here, this shouldteach him
a lesson.”
Victor: “What? But mom, I… I…”
He’s moved closer, but keeps shouting.Me:
“What? You didn’t do anything?”
His shifty eyes move to Nkateko and the officer, he
wants someone to intervene for him. That is something I will
not allow, with the pace Victor isgoing, I will age before my
time.
“No really, you can take him home. It’s easy to makethis
disappear. We’ll pretend it never happened.”
Again the officer’s voice is discreet, desperationplaying in
it.
Me: “No, I insist. He is my son and I want him here.”
Victor’s facial expression states he cannot believewhat
he is hearing, his hands curl around the bars, tears filling
his eyes. As a mother, my heart breaksat the sight of tears
in my son’s eyes. I can’t affordto be weak though, I won’t
reap anything if I let himout.”

“Yah neh!”
The policeman complains with little to no words, hedrags
his feet back down the corridor. I catch a glimpse of
Nkateko, I think I need his opinion, but I am afraid that he
will side with Victor. Maybe this is
my chance to have him change his ways. Victor:
“Uncle please, don’t leave me here.”
He pleads through clenched teeth, tears cascadingdown
his face. The man I love releases a long hefty sigh, his
hand has not left my waist. I would have itno other way,
my soul approves of his closeness.
Nkateko: “I’m sorry Vic.”
He breathes painfully, it hurts me that he is also hurting.
Nkateko loves my babies as if they belongto him and I
will be grateful till my last breath. I would accept his
surname, had I not been afraid ofmarriage. There must
be a way to deal with my phobia of marriage, my Tsonga
man deserves the entire universe. He deserves a woman
who will givehim everything in the world, he can have
my soul ifthat would suffice.

Victor: “No, no uncle please. I won’t survive in here. Ididn’t

mean to do it okay, I’m sorry I hurt him. I’m sorry I was
foolish and stupid. I’m sorry I’ve been difficult. It’s dad. He
did this to me, he made me this
person. I started hating the world because my dad
doesn’t want me. Please, I didn’t mean to do it, it was
a game and things got out of hand. I didn’t mean to
hurt Sam, I’m…”
Me: “Wait! Which Sam?”
I ask, my nose flaring as my mind has put two and two
together. It cannot be that little boy Victor fought with.
Annoyance nudges me as I wait for Victor to explain what
he did, he bites his bottom lip,his eyes refusing to look at
me. My anger must be illuminating from the outside
because Nkateko draws nearer, I feel his warm breath on
my ear and ashiver threatening to take over my body. With
all my might I fight against it. This is not the time to show
how much this man affects my body.
Nkateko: “Calm down Nkatanga.”
His voice is an undertone, soft enough for me to hear. I
want to calm down, but I can’t. If my son didsomething
to Sam then I won’t be able to help him.How will I even
face Sam’s parents?
I manage a deep breath that lessens my anger by a
percentage, not enough for me to want to get Victorout.

Me: “What did you do to Sam?”

Victor’s head whips back to the boys who have beenquiet
since our arrival, I see one of them shake theirhead, his
body drenched in fear. I figure whatever they did must be
worse than I thought.
Me: “Victor!”
I get his attention back with a single shout, he keepshis
eyes away from me.
Victor: “It was a game mom, we didn’t think it wouldgo
this far. I- I catfished him.”
Why am I not surprised by this revelation? Nkateko and I
exchange worried glances, I have something on my mind
and I am glad he approves. Victor mightnot be his, but his
opinion should matter like I had said.
Victor: “I’m sorry, please don’t leave me in here.”
Nelly: “I’m not always going to be there to clean up
your mess, you messed up Victor and you need to account
for your actions, a night or two in a holdingcell won’t kill
you.”
I’m done talking, so I turn and begin my walk out ofthis
damned place. There are heavy footsteps trailing behind
me.
Victor: “Uncle please do something, don’t let herleave
me here uncle.”
My heart clips at the sound of my baby’s screams,
Nkateko takes my hand as we walk down the hall. Victor
will be strong, I have to do damage control. I can’t
imagine what Sam’s parents are going through.

-SABELO ZULU

This is no place to be after midnight, but I have no choice,

life has brought me here. Nothing is going right, with each
passing moment my wife’s anger elevates. Rose is becoming
impossible to live with, Iwould let her go if I could live
without her.
“This is it man.”
Lwandle says, pointing at the smallest shack in the midst of
five medium ones. It is fifteen minutes aftermidnight, we are
in Alex in the middle of informal settlements. Apparently a
powerful sangoma lives here, Lwandle says she is the only
one who can change my situation.
Me: “Haibo njani ntwana? You said this woman willhelp
me gain riches. How is a poor person going tohelp me get
rich?” (How?)
That shack looks like it will crumble to the groundany
moment.
Lwandle: “A healer cannot heal himself."
My foot, what am I getting myself into? She willprobably
strip me of my last cent.
Me: “Ok’salayo and why do we have to see her at
night? Is she a witch?”
Lwandle: “I told you, she’s a powerful sangoma. Areyou
doing this or not?”
Me: “It’s not like I have a choice, my wife will leave
me if I don’t bring money home.”
Lwandle: “That woman will be the death of you
Sabza.”
Me: “Then I would die a happy man.”
Lwandle: “Beauty is not everything.”
Me: “Yeah, tell that to your ugly girlfriend.”
He laughs.
Lwandle: “Just go in.”
Me: “Aren’t you coming with?”
Lwandle: “I’ll wait out here.”

Okay this is it, my heart starts beating fast as I approach

the shack. I stand at the door, contemplating if I should go
in or not. Is this even agood idea?
“Come in”
A female voice says from the other side of the door,
startling me. How did she know that I’m here?
“Take your shoes off.” I hear Lwandle from behind, Ido
as told and enter the room. A woman dressed insangoma
clothes is seated on a reed mat.
“Come in Sabelo, I have been waiting for you.”
She knows my name? No this is witchcraft, it can’t be.
Ignoring the chaos in my heart, I make my way toa reed
mat before her, she starts burping the moment our eyes
meet. Why am I looking at a sangoma in the eyes?
Me: “How do you know my name?”
I hope she is not my mother’s friend, I am creepedout by
the way she is looking at me.
Me: “Thokoza gogo.”
I clap my hands in hopes that the awkward momentwould
pass.
“How may I help you?”
Good, now we are getting down to business.
Me: “The thing is that I miss Mandela, I don’t
remember what his face looks like anymore. Canyou
imagine forgetting that great man’s face? It
must be a sin. I’m tired, I want to be rich.”
The confidence in my declaration is evident, I thought
about this long and hard. Poverty should bea sin, no
human should be subjected to such. I don’tknow from
which hell it came from but curse it. I want to be seen, I
am sick of people seeing a shadow of me. If money gives
you dignity in society,then I am willing to do anything to
get it.

“How far are you willing to go to have what you

want?”
Haibo! She’s a mind reader?
Me: “As far as the path goes, I’d give up my most,
priciest possession if I have to.”
“Your wife?”
Huh?
Me: “My wife? Where does she fit in here? I meantalcohol,
I am willing to quit drinking.”
This sangoma is strange, why would she ask such athing?
“Then you’re at the wrong place, didn’t your friendexplain
how we do things here?”
We? She and who else? I am suddenly terrified, my
bones welcome cold shivers. Does she have zombies in
this house?”
Me: “Makhosi?”
“I can make you rich Sabelo but easy money comeswith
sacrifices. You will have to give something to get what
you want.”
Me: “I don’t have money.”
“I am not talking about money, but blood.”Oh
I see, that can’t be hard.
Me: “Okay, when should I bring the chicken?”
Why is she shaking her head? She appears to be annoyed as
well, I don’t like the look she is giving me.
“I’m talking about a human sacrifice, the one you love
the most will have to be sacrificed if you wantriches.”
What is wrong with this sangoma? Did she study
‘how to confuse Sabelo’ at the initiation school?Me: “I
don’t understand Makhosi.”
“You. Have. To. Kill. Your. Wife.”
Me: “JESUS!!!”
I scream in shock and the sangoma glares daggersat me
before taking up a heavy tongue click.

---
To be continued…
“FORTY FOUR”

“Baby please eat.” Instead of opening his mouth, Sam

serves his mother nothing but a blank expression. It has
been like this for days, Sam hasnot eaten anything since
he came home from thehospital nor has he uttered a
single word to his parents.
The doctors cried shock and that he will be okay, theboy
needs love and attention and that’s what his parents have
been giving him and more. But there is no change in Sam’s
condition, he stays in his room laying on the bed. When
awake, he would stare into thin air or shed endless tears.

His mother gently drops the spoon of porridge in thebowl

and takes another warm fresh spoonful, but Sam refuses
her even a glimpse. She’s tired, exhausted beyond words.
She misses her baby, his voice, his smile and his little
sassy attitude. If she could, she would burst into tears and
plead with her
son to come back. But she is a rock and wants to bestrong
for her baby boy.

“Do you want chicken? It’s your favourite, remember?”

Mom tries, in hopes that Sam will at least blink…
anything to let her know he is still in there. To let her
know that she has not lost her son.

“Okay, stay put. I’ll go and get the chicken. Three big
pieces of sticky drumsticks coming right up.” Mom kisses
him on the cheek, she takes a few seconds toglance at her
son seated on the bed. Tears threatento expose her
weakness, she pushes them back before they could invade
her privacy.

The second she shuts the door, Sam blinks at the sound
of his phone buzzing. He looks over it on thenightstand
and removes it from the charger. As he unlocks the
screen, messages and notifications flood in. His heart
stops for a while, he tries to breathe but starts
hyperventilating. Fear and shame
hover around him, this has been going on for days.
Various videos of that night were plastered all over
social media, the perpetrators did not waste time in
showing off their evilness. The footages went viral the
very next day of Sam’s attack. He’s been ridiculed,
made fun of and shamed in front of the entire country.

Sam doesn’t want to open the messages, but curiosity

gets the better of him. His hands shake uncontrollably
as he opens the notifications wherehis name was
mentioned, his heart breaks again atthe sight of the
video that destroyed his life. The comments are
appalling.

-“This is sad, who would do this to someone’s child.”

-“I don’t see anything wrong with what these kids did,it
was probably a game and the victim took it seriously.”
-“Serves him right, people like him don’t deserve to
walk the face of the earth.”
-“My father would have beat the gayness out of him,I
commend the kids who taught him a lesson. Gay for
what?”
-“This is a punishment from God, he didn’t createAdam
and Steve. This is an abomination, a sin toGod.”
-“This comment section is full of bitter people, whoare
you to judge this poor boy? This God you speakof has
not pointed a finger at him, hell is for judgemental
people like you.”
-“It’s sad that the majority of commenters are adultswho
have nothing but slurs to throw at this innocent boy. What is
his crime? He has the right to love whoever he wants. His
sexuality is none of your business. I don’t see all of you
pointing fingers at serial killers, rapists and fornicators.
But you prosecute the innocent child for being gay, grow
up.”
-“This is so embarrassing, if I were this boy, I wouldkill
myself. How do you face the world after this? Itcan never
be me.”
Sam’s heart is split in two, his brain can’t function
properly. It hurts, everything hurts so bad he can’t
stand it. He wants to hide from the world, he wantsfade
into oblivion.
His whole body shuddering, Sam wipes the stubborntears
that keep kissing his tiny face. South Africa has chosen his
fate, they have trialled and sentencedhim. How will he
move on from this? How will he face humanity? No one
from his school has bothered to apologise for what
happened to him.
Maybe if Victor took the step, maybe if Victor admitted to
his crime… maybe Sam would be okay, maybe he would
heal and start to build his life again.
He feels worthless, unloved, empty and alone. Sure his
parents are there for him, but it’s not enough. It’stheir job
to be there, to protect him from the world and make him
feel loved.

NELLY PAGE…
Victor hasn’t spoken to me in days, he walks pastme as
if I were invisible. Nkateko is going through the same
thing, I decided to give him space.
Nonetheless, it has been too long, tomorrow we aregoing
to Sam’s house to offer an apology. I delayedthe meeting
because I didn’t want Sam’s parents tomeet an angry and
arrogant Victor.
They say children mirror their parents and I would be
damned to take credit for Bhekifa’s wrong doings.
Speaking of the fool, I need him to accompany us. He is
Victor’s father, the least he could do is make time for this
meeting. This will be good for Victor aswell, his father’s
participation in his life will mean alot to him. I have
informed Sam’s mother, she was very upset and I
understand where she is coming from. Any mother would,
I would kill for my kids andI can’t even begin to think
what is going on in her head.

I leave Nkateko with the other kids in the living roomto

meet Victor in his room, the boy doesn’t respond to my
knock so I let myself in. He’s sitting on the bed,
lost in thought.
Me: “Victor.”
His eyes twitch before he regards me with a coldstare,
he’s still upset I see.
Me: “Can we talk?”
His silence is my cue, so I tread to the bed and settleon the
edge of it. He huffs a little, his brows knit in afrustrated
frown.
Me: “Won’t you tell me what’s on your mind?”
He shakes his head, denying me a conversation withmy
first born.
Me: “You can’t bottle things up Victor, speak to me
please. I’m your mother, no one will ever love you like I
do.”
Victor: “Why did Nkateko leave me in that place? I
hate him.”
Hiabo! This child must be possessed.
Me: “It was my decision to leave you in there, nothis.”
Victor: “Still, I asked him not to tell you anything. Buthe
brought you with, it would have been our little secrets. I
guess he is just like dad, they are all full ofempty
promises.”
He’s crying and he’s angry, I don’t understand whatis
going on with him anymore. Am I losing my son?

Me: “Baby talk to me, why do you harbour so much

anger? What is going on Victor?”
Victor: “I want him gone mom.”
I don’t know, but my heart sinks at his announcement. It
could be the cold look in his eyesor the deadpan voice.
Me: “You want who gone?”
Victor: “Your boyfriend.”
Since when does he call Nkateko that? Me:
“What are you talking about Victor?”For
some reason, I am terrified.
Victor: “I want to be alone, please leave.”
Me: “I hope you’re not thinking of doing anything
stupid, prison is not a good place for a young boylike
you.”
I need to call Bhekifa before this gets out of hand, Ihave a
bad feeling about this. I counsel people for aliving, but can’t
even help my son.

Victor: “Okay.”
He deadpans as he shrugs his shoulders.
Me: “We’re going to Sam’s house tomorrow to offeran
apology, be ready by 10am.”
Victor doesn’t dispute, but lies down and faces the other
way. My mind is entertaining strange thoughts,thoughts
that could never lurk in the mind of a ninthgrader.
Death… Victor wouldn’t hurt Nkateko, would he? After
what happened to Sam, I am not sure whatmy son is
capable of.

*******
For the first in days, Sam steps out of his room. Thelight
in the passage is off, he hears the TV from theliving
room and Noxolo Grootboom’s voice fills the place. He
knows his father is watching the news. A weak smile
creeps on his mouth at how his father has recorded news
bulletins of Noxolo. He watchesthem from time to time.
He says no one reads the news like her and he wouldrather
watch repeats than entertain all these new comers. His
dad secretly has a crush on the woman,Sam and his
mother would tease the big man about it.

Sam takes a step towards the lounge, the door to the

kitchen is just on the way. He stops, turns to see his
mother bustling in the kitchen. The smell of fried chicken
fills his nose, but does nothing to his appetite. Usually, his
tummy would get all excited over the aroma.
Appreciation swamps over Sam, he loves that woman and
appreciates her for everything she is to
him. He strides in the kitchen, his mother misses his
footsteps due to the loud sound of the food sizzlingon the
stove. Sam wraps his arms around her waist from behind,
it startles mom a little, but she knows her baby’s arms. A
smile takes over her lips and tears are happy to paint her
cheeks. This is what shehas been waiting for, this is what
she has been praying for.

“Baby.” Mom whispers, sobbing.

“I love you mommy and I’m sorry.” Sam murmurs, his
mom moves from his arms to find that her son is back to
himself. He’s thinner than he was and his eyes are sunken
in, but the usual glow in his eyes is back. That natural
smile is back, her Sam is back.
She cups his cheeks and tattoos the visible parts ofhis
face with multiple kisses. Sam giggles… Ah!
Music to his mother’s ears.

The two turn as they feel a heavy presence in the kitchen

to find the man of the house leaning against
the door post, smiling at his little family with unshedtears
in his eyes. Sam returns the smile and runs into his huge
arms that swallow all of him the moment his father
embraces him.
“I love you dad, I’m sorry for being a disappointment.I
promise to make you proud in my next life, I will bethe
son you have always wanted. Not a weakling who can’t
defend…”
His words are sent back down his throat by his
father’s hand covering his mouth.
“No son, don’t ever say that. You are not a
disappointment. You are not a weakling, you’re mybaby
Sam. My only son, you’re perfect for me andyour
mother.”
The giant embraces his son again, he lifts him up ina tight
hug that brings Sam into a world of laughter. His parent’s
hearts jump with joy at the sound of their son laughing,
they didn’t think he would heal sosoon.

“Okay, enough with the emotional stuff.” The mom

interrupts, she is tired of shedding tears. “The foodis
almost ready, you can join your father in the livingroom
while I finish up.”
“I would like to eat in my room if that’s okay, but I
want to take a nap first. I will eat when I wake up.”Sam
says, widely smiling at his mother.
“Uh… okay. Don’t sleep too much baby, I’ll wake youup
once I’m done. Then you can go back to sleep after
stuffing your face.” The mom.
She doesn’t want to push him, Sam is okay with that.
“I love you guys, so much.” He tells them and leavesafter
they return.

Sam’s smile immediately dissipates the second he shuts

his bedroom door, he leans against it as tearsseep down
his face. His heart is in so much pain he’s finding it hard
to breathe. He wants it to stop, hewants the pain to stop. Is
it too much to ask for a little acceptance? He settles down
on the bed, his hand hides in the pocket of his brown
shorts and comes out with a box he got from the
bathroom.
‘Ratex’

He reads it over and over, there are no second thoughts.

This is it, this is the only way he will be freed from pain
and shame. The burden is too muchto carry. His hands
begin to shake again as he opensthe box. It’s a sealed
packet and with great difficulty,Sam manages to consume
the entire box. He quicklyjumps into bed and hides under
the blankets, thinking this will be an easy ride.

To be continued…
“FORTY FIVE”

What is a mother’s worst nightmare? One would name a

few, finding your child choking in their own blood is one
them. Sam is lain on his bed, groaning in excruciating
pain, blood bubbling out of his mouth.His lungs are slowly
shutting down, making it impossible for the young boy to
breathe.
It’s been over an hour since Sam said he was goingto
take a nap, his mother walks in his room to call him for
supper and what she finds will forever be imprinted in
her head.
“SAMUEL!” A blood curdling scream fills the room, itis
heard by Sam’s father from the living room. Mom hurries
to cuddle her son, that’s all she could think ofas the fear of
losing him consumes and paralyses every part of her. She
is screaming her heart out, herarms tightly clasp around
Sam, rocking him back and forth.

Sam’s father is there in a jiffy, unlike his wife, his

brain still works. Although his breath catches and hisheart
clips, he’s able to grab Sam from his wife and rush to the
car. Mom runs behind him, screaming and crying, her
agonising cries are loud enough for the entire
neighbourhood to hear.
By the time neighbours run out of their respectablehomes to
inspect the horrific screams, the heartbroken couple has
driven off with their son.
What is left behind are trails of crimson bloodleading to
the crime scene… Sam’s room.

BHEKIFA ZULU…

“What is so urgent that it couldn’t wait till morning?”A

call from Nelly took me by surprise, I haven’t spoken to
her in a while. I can only hope she won’t ask about the
kids, I have nothing to give her right now.
Nelly: “Victor did something bad…”
Me: “What happened?”
I’m in the car on my way home from work and tiredas
hell. Nelly goes on to explain what Victor has been up
to, listening attentively to what my son hasdone, my heart
cracks.
Nelly: “…so, we have to go there to apologise.”
Me: “Is there a need for that Nelly? Victor has servedhis
sentence, like you said, he spent time in jail. Can’tyou let it
go? I’m pretty sure that boy’s family has forgotten about
it.”
This is probably the last thing my son wants, to be
reminded of his mistakes.
Nelly: “Do you hear yourself Bhekifa? What if it wasVictor
in Sam’s shoes? Would you have let it go ordemanded an
apology.”

Me: “You said it has been days since it happened, the

family must be over it. Why do you feel a need to
apologise?”
Nelly: “Because it is the right thing to do, Victor needs to
know that what he did was wrong. We need
to set a good example Bhekifa.”
Me: “Not by humiliating him like this? Does he evenwant
to do this? Did you ask him how he feels aboutit, or are
you forcing him to apologise?”
Nelly: “You know what? I’m not going to argue with you
about this. Your son messed up, he ruined someone else’s
life and we’re going to make amends with the family
tomorrow. I expect you to bethere.”
Me: “That sounds more like an order.”
Nelly: “Take it however you like.”
The line goes quiet, she just hung up on me.
*
*
*
Grief is like living two lives. One is where you pretendthat
everything is alright, and the other is where your heart
silently screams in pain.
The house is filled with mourning hymns, close
relatives have come to mourn with the couple. Thelife of
a fifteen year old has been cut short as if hisscript was a
few pages long when he was born.
Sam’s mother has not mustered up the courage toleave
her son’s room since they got home from thehospital this
morning.

It was in early hours of the morning when Sam’s soul

departed from his body, unfortunately the poison had
done too much damage in his stomachthat the doctors
could not save him. He had internalbleeding, his lungs
collapsed.

We could say the boy gave a fight, but he didn’t havethe will
to fight for life anymore.

Sam’s parents died a thousand deaths when the

doctor gave them the bad news, his mother couldnot
control her heart wrenching screams. It took about an
hour to convince her to let go of Sam’s
body as she clung to it for dear life.

Meanwhile outside, Nelly parks her car outside thegate.

Had it not been for Bhekifa, they would have been there
earlier. Zulu has not been answering hercalls, the last
time Nelly tried his phone it sent her straight to
voicemail. Thank God for Nkateko, the man is like a belt
to loose pants… always there.

“Mom.” Victor calls, eyes inspecting the crowdedsingle

story house. There are people gathered outside, men
and women. The atmosphere is suddenly gloomy that
even the boy can sense it.
“Something is going on.” At her son’s alert, Nelly
peeks over and her heart immediately stops. Justone
look at their faces any adult could guess whatthe
gathering is about.
“I need you to stay in the car, I’ll go and see what’s
happening.” This is her, protecting her son.
“I’m coming with you.” Of course her pillar of
strength is here, like he promised from the beginning.

Cursing Bhekifa back to hell would be cruel of humanity

to do, the man is just… he’s just… Oh curseit… let the
stones be cast upon him.

As much as Victor won’t voice it out, his father’s

absence stings.
Victor is okay with not going in there, the younger isnot
ready to see Sam. It’s bad enough that he’s beendrenched
in guilt for days. Shame has him by his ears, facing Sam
will be the same as hanging himself. Last night the boy
spent hours going over his apology, he’s not satisfied with
what he came upwith. A sorry is all he got, it’s as
shameful as he is.

Nkateko and Nelly tread towards the gate, the gentleman

takes her hand into his. Intertwining theirhands together
as they enter the premises.
Something strange seeps through Nelly’s entire
being, she can’t point it out. However it doesn’t feel good, it
has her shivering coldly. Nkateko notices thesmall shiver
and slides his hand on the small of her back.
“Are you okay?” Nelly’s reaction is a single nod,
Nkateko is not convinced. But he will have to take it.
The couple is approached by a middle-aged, short and
plump woman. Naturally, Nelly offers a smile. It’s not
her usual flashy smile, lest she offends thepeople who
look grief-stricken.

“May I help you?” The woman’s voice is sadly low.

As Nelly opens her mouth to speak, a tall man walksout of
the house and their eyes instantly meet. The last time she
saw him, he looked stronger than this.His shoulders were
not slumped, his eyes were not bloodshot and hollow.
Sam’s father approaches them, slowly and cautiously. So
many things are running through his mind. He is not
certain what his mouth will offer first, curses or
greetings.
Nelly’s heart does that thing again, it’s hammering
vigorously in her chest. Maybe with a mission to jump
out and run out of that compound… Lord, don’tlet this be
what I think it is. A silent prayer replays inher head like a
broken record.

“Hi, I’m…” Nelly’s hand is stretched out to Sam’s father

who turns a blind eye to it, he snubs it as if it’snot even
there. I guess his mind has chosen curses because the
second he opens his mouth they pour out like a child
throwing up Castor oil that was forced down their throat.
“You will never have peace in your life.”
Like a jolt of lightning, shock nudges at Nelly and
Nkateko at the mention of these words. “Your sontook
my son from me, he took my only son.”
Nelly’s biggest fear is confirmed, something terriblehas
happened to Sam. Her eyes widen with unshed tears, she
leers over at Nkateko who appears to be shocked as well.
However, he is a tad bit reticent.
“S- Sam.” Her voice is a whisper.
Hearing his son’s name roll out of the tongue of thewoman
whose son is responsible for Sam taking hislife evokes
something dark inside the father’s chest.
“Don’t you dare mention his name,” the father’s roar
catches the attention of everyone around, includingVictor
who is relaxing in the comfortable seat of hismother’s big
vehicle. The boy is oblivious to the havoc he has created.

Spotting a murderous hatred in the father’s eyes,

Nkateko feels a need to pull Nelly closer to him, aneed
to protect the one he loves.
“Please, what happened to him? Tell me, what happened
to Sam.” A crying mess Nelly has become,it wasn’t so hard
to catch the grieving father’s words.What she wants is a
confirmation.
“Sam is gone, our boy is gone. He couldn’t take the
suffering anymore, our son killed himself.” The middle
aged woman is still here, her words are painted with
pain and misery.
Nelly wants to scream her lungs out, what has Victordone?
She staggers a step back, but her pillar of strength is there
to hold her up lest she falls.
“I’m sorry.” Nelly sends an apology, although it sounds
more like a plea. The father refuses to accept it, he is
shaking his head vigorously. It hurts, it hurts more than
burning your hand with steam from a boiling kettle. It
hurts more than finding your leftovers eaten after a long
day at work. It hurts more than biting your tongue from
chewing gum thewhole day like a cow. Heck, it hurts
more than anything he has ever known.

“Your son will never know peace, I swear to God hewill

never know how it feels to be called father. He will never
hear the soothing sound of his own childcrying, he will
never look into the eyes of his own child and hold them in
his arms. That boy will neverhave anything that he has
stripped from us... a child.” The father’s curse shreds
Nelly’s heart into strips like paper, her tears have ceased
to be aboutSam’s death, they are for her son now. The boy
who
is standing behind her unbeknownst to Nelly. Victor
cannot understand why such terrible words are spoken
on him.

“I’m sorry that Sam took this route, but that curse will
not fall on my son. His life belongs to God, andno
weapon formed against him shall prosper” Nelly
proclaims, these are her mother’s teachings.
Proclaim the word of God upon your children.
“Mom.” Tears trace down Victor’s face as he calls his
mother like a lost sheep. As Nelly turns back to her son,
someone turns her back to the front and something,
painfully collides with her face. The slapis so hard that she
falls right in Nkateko’s arms, shesees stars for a while.

This is uncalled for… Nkateko is quick to shove his lover

behind him, his eyes glaring at Sam’s mother who came
out of nowhere. Her lips pressed togetherin anger. She is
a woman and Nkateko understands that the lady is
grieving, but how dare she. How dare,
she touches his Nkatanga.

“That was not necessary.” Nkateko snarls under his

breath, his jaw locked in supressed rage. His eyes trail
to Nelly beside him, her gaze is glued on the
inconsolable mother adorned in black mourning clothes.
Her hand works tirelessly to rub away the pain on her
cheek…
Suck it up Nelly, it is nothing compared to what thisfamily is
feeling.

Everyone has come out to watch, they seem to havecaught

what the commotion is about and that has them stabbing
glares at Nelly and her little family.

“I’m sorry.” That’s all Nelly has to offer, tears run down
the mother’s face, she will most likely shedthem the entire
year if not her whole life. Nelly cansee and feel the sorrow
that is suffocating the woman.
“All my baby ever wanted was to be accepted.” She
holds up something that was hanging on her handfrom
the second she stepped out of the house dueto the sound
of her husband’s roar.

“Look at him.” A picture of Sam, he looks so happy there.

Like he was laughing when the picture was taken, his eyes
are not looking directly at the camera.Perhaps at the
person taking it, could have been his mother or father.
“My son was a happy child, he has never hurt anyone in
his life. Do you know how much it took for us to have a
child? What we went through to finally be parents? For six
years, we prayed to God thinking we were cursed with
bareness. Then one day when hope was lost, Sam came
like manna fromheaven. He filled our lives with light, we
were happy for once in our lives.”

Sam’s mother struggles with her vocabulary as hervoice

breaks with each word she utters, people canonly watch
with eyes filled with tears and broken
hearts. Not one has offered to comfort her, not evenher
husband who is slowly dying beside her.
Incredulous gasps are heard when she sinks to herknees
before Nelly, Sam’s picture frame still held upfor Nelly to
see.
“Please.” The mother stifles a painful sob. “Pleasegive
me back my son, I will do anything. Just bring my son
back to me.”
Louder and louder she cries, the pain is unbearableshe
doesn’t know what to do with herself. Heart wrenching
cries surround the area, reducing the bystanders to
tears.

“I think you should go.” There is no need for Nelly tobe

there, Sam’s father seems to think so.
“No.” Mom grabs the hem of Nelly’s dress, her facefalls
on her legs as she desperately cries. “Please give me,
my son first, don’t leave without giving me,my Sam
back.”
Nelly is also a weeping mess, guilt and shame are
dancing around her. She hasn’t turned to check on
her son who is probably traumatised upon hearing
about Sam’s death.
“SAMMY! SAMMY, MY BABY!” The mother scream
cries, refusing to let go of Nelly’s legs who does notbother
fighting to claim them back.
“M…mom, let’s go.” That’s Victor’s voice, the little shit
is crying. His peanut sized brain has caught on.Took him
long enough.

“I… I WANT… MY SON, GIVE ME, MY SON.

PLEA...PLEASE.”
Unable to take the painful sight, the middle-aged woman
attempts to embrace Sam’s mother, but shedoesn’t want
to be comforted. A mother wants her baby back. Is she
asking for too much?

“It’s okay, it’s okay.” The relative comforts to no availas

Sam’s mother breaks out of her hold. With no warning she
drops the picture of Sam and shoots upto her feet, they
lead her to a terrified Victor who is
drowning in his own tears. Not once did he think thiswould
happen, it has to be a mistake. Sam couldn’t have killed
himself, it has to be a dream if not a mistake.

Sam’s mother grabs Victor’s arms with ruthless pressure,

her eyes piercing his as if looking into soul.Victor can’t
control the trembling of his body, fear has him paralysed
or else he would have ran to the car.
“All I want is to see my son, even if it’s for the last time. I
need to hear his voice, I need to see him smileat me again.”
She pleads with Victor, Nelly wants to grab her son her
from her hold, but perhaps this will ease the mother’s pain.
“H- he’s not with… m… me.” Victor’s voice breaks,
fear evident in his widened eyes.
“NO.” Sam’s mother shouts. “You don’t understand,all I
want is a glimpse of my Sammy or I will die. Youtook my
baby, you took my baby.”
She’s screaming at the boy, Victor manages to slip
out of her great hold. His feet run him to his mother’s car,
he dashes in, hides in the back seat and entertains a series
of tears. Sam’s mother is leftto her heart breaking cries,
her weak knees drop herto the ground.
“NOOO! SAMMY!!! COME BACK TO ME PLEASE.”

This cannot be happening, Sam was smiling at her just

last night. She held him in her arms and kissedhim on
his soft cheek. She told him she loved him and he said it
back, it was just yesterday and momremembers it
clearly. Now Sam is gone like he wasnever there.
Sam’s father runs to his wife, he stifles a sob as hedrops
down next to her. His large arms cradle her, the couple
weep for their son.
“I’ll be a good mother this time, tell God to give me
another chance. Tell him to give my son back… please.”
She wails loudly, clinging on to her husbandby crumpling
his shirt in her fisted hands, her face hidden on his chest.
Seeing that they have caused enough damage, Nellyand
her lover follow their cursed brat… I mean their beloved
Victor to the car. He’s still weeping when they get there,
if he were not at fault, Nelly would take him in his arms
and comfort him. She bursts into her own waterworks,
Nkateko is quick to take her in his arms. They should be
driving away, considering the lamentation outside.

---
To be continued…
“FORTY SIX”

-SABELO ZULU

Me? Sabelo Zulu, sacrifice my wife? When pigs fly…

There can only be one Rose in this world and I was the
lucky bastard to find this gem of a woman. Okay,okay…
maybe gem is taking it a little too far, she’s the devil’s
agent lately. Shouts and screams when her demons come
knocking and makes me her target. Hey, listen, I’m a man
and I can stand my ownunlike my brother. But to lay a
hand on my wife is something I will never do, maybe in my
dreams. I canhave my way with her there and add a kick
to that loud mouth of hers.
That day after the sangoma told me that I had to sacrifice
my wife, I ran out of that house like my life depended on
it. God, I even wished I had one of my mother’s brooms so
I could fly home. I haven’t spoken to Lwandle since, that
man will sell me to thelowest bidder. The friends we keep.
“Sorry bhuti.”
An ugly voice drags me out of my musing, I turn to find a
tall big woman glaring down at me. No man, this is not
right. This woman’s big body is so unnecessary, God
really didn’t have to make womentaller than men. Now
I’m looking up at her like a childready to be punished. I
need to start wearing shoes that will make me look taller
around such people.
Me: “What?”
I’m not smiling with anyone today, I haven’t been
smiling since I got to work.
“Where can I put this?”
She’s asking me? I hate this job, Shembe hear my cryand
make me a king or a president. I’ll even take Gigaba’s job,
I don’t mind.
Me: “I don’t know griza, that’s not my job
description.”
That’s all I’m going to say to her, I hate tongue clickswith
all my heart. Dammit, I should have a gun to
shoot people who go around clicking their tongues.It’s
only 11am and I am dead tired, exhausted and irritated to
the core.

This PEP uniform feels so uncomfortable, I can’t stand

it. Yeah, yeah. You can wipe that grin off yourface. Yes I
got a job at PEP, for an uneducated foollike me,
guarding the door at PEP was the only job Icould find.
“Haibo bhuti, I’m late. I need to know where to put my
groceries, the next thing you’ll be accusing me ofstealing
these things when I bought them from Shoprite.”
Me: “Yoh, yoh, yoh gogo. So you woke up today and
decided to come and annoy me? I said I don’t know hau,
do whatever makes you dance and leave me outof it.”
The tongue click again, she marches in with her
groceries. I don’t care, I need a new job. I barely
make ends meet with the lousy two cents I makehere.
-NELLY PAGE

Leaving my ex-husband was a choice I made thinking

life would be a little easier, but I have beenproven
wrong. Nothing is going right, things are spiralling out
of control and I am spent. There is nowhere to turn to,
there seems to be a dark cloudhovering over our heads.
“Are you sure about this, Nkatanga?”
Gosh how I love this man, Nkateko is everything I need
and more. The fact that he’s here lessens the burden. I
made a decision to stop writing. I just unpublished my
page on Facebook. My life is a messand I need to focus on
my kids.
Me: “There is no turning back now.”
He sits on the couch facing me, I love how touchy heis. A
smile stretches on my lips at the feel of his hands rubbing
up and down my arms.
Nkateko: “Victor hasn’t come out of his room.”
I don’t see him doing that anytime soon.
Me: “I called in a favour with a friend, she’s a child
psychologist.”
Nkateko: “Getting him help is a good start, what
happened today will never leave him. It might affecthis
future.”
Me: “What if Sam’s parents press charges against him,
bullying is a crime Nkateko. My son is going toserve time
in jail.”
I know I wanted him punished, but years in jail willdestroy
Victor. He’s only a child.
Nkateko: “If they do, then we’ll get him the bestlawyer.”

“Am I going to jail?”

Oh no! How did I not see him coming? He’s standingin the
doorway of the lounge, hands crossed over his chest. My
baby looks so frail and terrified.
Victor: “Am I going to jail mom?”
He repeats when I fail to answer him, I have to standto get
closer.
Me: “Victor, you’re not a child anymore. You know
that bullying is a serious crime.”
His eyes widen, tears streak down his cheeks. I wantto
caress him, but now is not the time. I am still not okay
with his doings.
Victor: “B… but it was… a mistake mom. We just
wanted to teach him a lesson.”
Nkateko: “A lesson that has resulted in Sam takinghis
life.”
Victor regards Nkateko with a black look, he’s stillupset
with him.

Me: “It doesn’t matter what your motive was, there isno
justification for bullying, Victor. You have to facethe
consequences of your actions.”
Victor: “So you’re going to let me go to jail?”
His voice is incredulous, he steps back as if he’sdisgusted by
my presence.
Me: “If it happens that you’re taken, we’ll get you agood
lawyer.”
Victor: “Why are you saying those things to me, mom?I
don’t understand what’s going on.”
Victor moves to a seat and hugs his body. I turn toNkateko
for help, to find his face reflecting nothing.Just a blank
expression.
Me: “Hiding things from you would be wrong of me, I
know I should protect you baby. But you have to know
what your actions have birthed, you need to know the law
is against what you did and they mighttake you away.”
Victor sobs, he hides his face in the palms of hishands.
Victor: “I don’t want to go to jail, please don’t letthem
take me.”
Me: “The only thing we can do right now is think
positive, but you can’t mess up and think you will goscot
free. Life is not a fairy tale baby.
He jolts up in a fit of rage. Victor:
“Stop saying that to me.”
Where does this child get the idea that he can shoutat me?
Nkateko: “Victor!”
Victor: “No, I know I messed up. But, why does she have
to sing about it. I’m tired of hearing it. Don’t youthink I
feel guilty enough? I’m sorry for Sam and his parents.
But mom, I didn’t tell him to kill himself. It’snot my fault
that he was weak.”
Wow! Victor has drained all my strength. He takesoff
running towards the front door.
Me: “Victor wait.”
I shout, running after him. He pulls the door openwith
force and my heart jolts to my throat at the figure
standing on my doorstep.
Victor: “Dad.”
Victor cries, throwing himself in his father’s arms.
-SABELO ZULU

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“Haibo! Rose, is that not your husband standing atthe

door?”
I know that rough voice, my eyes chase it to find Rose
and her ugly friend Kea standing behind me.This
woman is dressed like she’s on a mission to catch a
blesser.
Me: “Rose!”
Her dubious eyes begin to scan the area.
Rose: “Shhh, not so loud Sabelo.”
What?
Me: “What are you doing here? Where are the kids?”
Rose: “I should be asking you that. What are you
doing here, Sabelo? What are you wearing?”
Disgust lies on her face as her gaze run up and downmy
figure.
Me: “I’m working, can’t you see?”
Rose: “At PEP?”
I hear condemnation in her voice.
Me: “Why not? You said to get a job and here I am
working.”
Rose: Yes, but I didn’t…”

The rest of her words are swallowed by an expensivelooking

man who emerges from nowhere and drapeshis long arm
around her shoulder. The sight is revolting, I am being
tested here. I take my time to look at him, the fool looks and
smells like money.
Me: “And then?”
Shembe, I prayed for riches not a rich old man formy
wife.

Me: “What the hell is going on here?”

People are watching, yes I am shouting. Work placeor not,
someone is going to die today.
Rose: “Sabelo, you’re embarrassing me.”
Jesus! This must be a test, unfortunately I am not Joseph.
I will kill someone, no one touches my wife.Not my Rose.
“Who is this fool?”
The old man has the audacity to call me names, I push
him off of Rose, but the stupid wife pushes meback. What
is this? Did that Sangoma cast a spell onme? That is the
only logical explanation, Rose wouldnever hurt me like
this.
Me: “Rose you are my wife, you are my wife Rose.Who
is this fool?”
She clicks tongue like all women do. My heart burnswhen
she grabs the old man’s hand and walks awaywith him.
Why am I not running after them? What onearth just
happened? Not today Satan, you have picked the wrong
man.

---
To be continued...
*****

I apologise for the late posts, free mode does notapply

everywhere. I see your comments and love.Thank you
so much.
“FORTY SEVEN”

-NELLY PAGE.

“They want to send me away dad, please don’t let

them.”
My son cries in his father’s arms, Bhekifa glares just as
Nkateko joins us in the lobby. His hand rests on the small
of my back, knowing him, he is marking histerritory.
Staking his claim.
Bhekifa: “It’s okay, I’m here now.”
Like hell he is, this is a two minute thing. My son willbe
back to crying for his father before the sun sets.
Bhekifa: “Are you okay?”
Bhe asks after pulling Victor out of his arms.Me:
“What are you doing here?”
Bhekifa: “You asked me to come, so here I am.” Me:
“Your presence was needed this morning when
we went to Sam’s house.”
Bhekifa: “Are you going to invite me in or what?”
Crudeness knows him best, he steps in with Victorclung to
him.

Nkateko: “I won’t be able to hold myself if he startstrouble,

please don’t hold it against me.”
Nkateko whispers to me as we follow Victor and
Bhekifa to the living room.
Me: “I’m sure he’ll behave.”
I’m hoping he will behave, Victor is traumatised
enough. I don’t want him to witness two big men
wrestling each other. Nkateko makes sure to hold me
close as we settle down on the couch oppositeBhekifa
and Victor. The boy has himself hidden under his
father’s wing.

Bhekifa: “I’m sorry I’m late, I had a business meetingto

attend.”
He’s lying to his son, I know it’s a lie. He can foolthem
all, not me. I have learned to read this manwhile I was
married to him.
Bhekifa: “What happened? Why is my son shaken?”I
snort at Bhekifa’s question because I am shocked.Me: “If
you were here, you would know.”
I’m not about to play nice with this man. His shifty eyes
move to Nkateko beside me, the look in them makes me
wonder if he’s here for Victor or Nkateko.
Bhekifa: “I told you, I was busy Nelly.”
He retorts while piercing daggers in Nkateko’s head,I
should call him out on it. This is not his place.
Victor: “A boy from my class killed himself…”
Victor starts his story, it’s hard to listen to it, especially
with his cracking voice. He doesn’t forgetto sob here and
there. It vexes me how Bhekifa is suddenly acting like the
loving father, my son will bedevastated when he leaves
and doesn’t come back. Iget a judgemental look from the
ex- when Victor wraps up his tale.
Bhekifa: “You want to get my son arrested?”
For an educated man, Bhekifa sure is acting stupid.
Me: “I think you didn’t hear him right, Victor bullied
someone. There is a possibility the boy’s parents willhave
him arrested.”
Bhekifa: “There is no proof that Victor was part ofthose
bullies, I didn’t see him in those videos.”
Oh, so he’s been following?
Me: “Sure there’s no proof, but there are witnesseswho
can put him in the scene of the crime and he doesn’t
have an alibi.”
Bhekifa: “Crime Nelly? You make it sound like he’s some
lowlife criminal. This is our son, you can’t giveup on him
because you failed to protect him.”
Me: “What are you talking about? The only person who
failed to protect our son is you. In case you haven’t
noticed, you’ve been gone for years Bhekifa. Ihad to take a
stand alone, I did my best to raise these kids right.”
How dare he? I will not roll over and wave my tail
because he says so.
Nkateko: “Vic please go to your room.”
Oh God, I almost forgot Victor is here. He’s perchedon
his father’s side, looks like he’s gone and never wants to
come back.

Bhekifa: “Don’t tell my son what to do.”

Bhekifa pulls Victor back as he stands, Nkateko did
predict this. I have to take a stand and try to avoid
looking at Bhekifa because Victor will spot the deadly
look I give him.
Me: “Baby, please go to your room. You’ll see yourfather
before he leaves.”
I don’t think he will obey, but he does. I watch him tillhe
disappears up the stairs. Bhekifa could kill Nkateko with
that look he’s giving him, perhaps I shouldn’t have let
him in.
Bhekifa: “What is he doing here?”
I knew he still barks, Lord have mercy and get thisman
out of here.
Nkateko: “I should be asking you that question, youhave no
place here anymore Zulu.”
Bhekifa: “I have a place in my kids' lives and as longas
they are here, then I have every right.”
Nkateko: “When did you come to this conclusion?Was
it before or after your son lost his mind?”
Bhekifa: “Who the hell do you think you are? Whatright
do you have over my kids to ask me such nonsense?”
It’s been years and I still don’t like the angry Bhekifa.
Me: “Nkateko has been here for your kids, he hasloved
them like a father should.”
Bhekifa: “Are you saying this fool has replaced me?”
He stands to his feet, his fiery eyes state he wants tostart a
war.
Bhekifa: “You’ve got to be kidding me, I am theirfather
not him.”
Me: “You seem to have forgotten about that over theyears,
you neglected those kids as if they meant nothing to you.”
Nkateko tries to pull me back when I stand, but I decline the
offer. This is my house, Bhekifa will nottower over me.
Bhekifa: “That does not change the fact that they aremine,
my blood runs in their veins in case you have forgotten.”

There is anger in his voice, malice in his words andmurder

in his eyes. I won’t let him get away with thinking he has the
right to do whatever he pleases.
Me: “How can I forget Bhekifa? Was it not me who came
to beg you to have a relationship with your kids? Was it
not me who pleaded with you to give them at least two
minutes of your time? I fought fortheir place in your life,
but it was a one sided battle.Surely I was never going to
win against your arrogance and pride. You placed other
things beforeyour children Bhekifa. Nkateko was there,
he stood and held them up. He became the father they
lost, itwould have been cruel of me to reject his love.”
I’m fuming, livid to the core. I want him to pay for making
my children suffer. I want him to pay for hisselfishness.
Nkateko: “You’re a bloody coward Zulu, you run awayfrom
responsibilities like a stupid teenage boy.”
Nkateko is standing beside me, pointing an accusatory
finger at Bhekifa who is ready to explodewith anger.
Bhekifa: “Fuck you, Mathebula.”
Bhekifa points one back, yelling at the top. I’m
praying the kids will not hear this argument.
Bhekifa: “Fuck you to hell.”
Nkateko: “I didn’t know I hit a nerve.”
Nkateko’s voice is just as condescending and that only
riles Bhekifa up, his feet thunder towards Nkateko and I
have to shield him in order to stop Bhekifa from doing
whatever his mind has relayed tohim.
Me: “Not in my house.”
Nkateko’s stubbornness shoves me to the side, he’s
standing head to head with Bhekifa and God I
foresee a terrible ending to this.

Bhekifa: “Fine, you want him to be a father to mykids?”

He growls, crudely poking Nkateko in the chest. Of course
being a man and fighting for his own ego, Nkateko does not
let it go. He pushes Bhekifa with force that he reels
backwards almost falling, but thedevil has a heel, it keeps
him steady and balanced.
His brows furrow, his eyes burn with a fiery rage.
Bhekifa: “You want my kids Mathebula? Go ahead,take
them. Father them, I’m done.”
Me: “What is that supposed to mean?”
What kind of childish behaviour is this?
Bhekifa: “Exactly what I said.”
Me: “You can’t do that Bhekifa, you can’t throw themaway
as if they are yesterday’s paper.”
Bhekifa: “This is what you wanted Nelly, you and this
bastard. But I want you to know one thing Mathebula.
He gets into his space, almost towering over
Nkateko.
Bhekifa: “This world is too small for us both and
you’re crowding my space.”
With a tongue click, Bhekifa turns and storms out of the
house. The audacity he has to bang my door, thebastard
won’t even see his kids for the last time.

-SABELO ZULU

It’s not too late to accept that sangoma’s conditions,Rose

will see the devil very soon if she keeps provoking me like
this. I have never been in such a hurry to go home. The
lights are on, that means she’s home. Today she is going
to see my mother’s child, Sabelo Zulu.
The house feels cold as I walk in, this could only mean
she didn’t cook. My assumptions are proven correct when
I detect nothing on the stove. The potsare empty and
packed away on their rightful place.
Me: “Is this the life I’m going to live till I’m ninety?”
Searching for answers and the wife, I tread around the
house and find her in our bedroom. Rose is standing on
the bedside, her hands tirelessly foldingclothes and
throwing them in a travel bag.

Me: “Are we going somewhere? Did we win a trip? Asfar as

I know, we are broke.”
Rose: “You are broke, not me.”
What is she talking about? She has the nerve to notlook
at me when addressing me.
Me: “What’s going on Rose?”
I stride in to stand next to her, maybe my hearing isplaying
games with me.
Rose: “I’m leaving, the kids are with my mother. They’ll
be staying with her from now on. You can gosee them on
weekends if you have time.”
Me: “How?”
I’m confused.
Rose: “Simple, you’re not the first man to be a weekend
special dad. It won’t hurt to see your kids…”
Me: “No, how is it possible that you’re leaving me?”She
finally turns to face me, the bloody witch.
Rose: “Hiabo Sabelo, did you really think a womanlike
me will live in poverty? Come on, don’t be a joke.”
Me: “Rose, what’s going on? I don’t understand.”
Someone please draw this down for me, maybe I’llbe
able to understand.
Rose: “I’m leaving you, I found someone else. The
divorce papers are over there on the bedside table,I’ve
already signed them. Abisola treats me like a queen and
he’s got all the money in the world.”
Now it’s starting to kick in, but for some reason I amtoo
shocked to speak. All I can do is stand here likean idiot
and watch my wife pack her clothes while throwing insults
at me.

Rose: “He’s a real man Sabelo, I had forgotten what

an orgasm feels like until I met him. Wow, that mandoes
things to me that would make any woman green with
envy. Prince Kaybee has nothing on Obisola.”
She laughs and my frozen state won’t let me move,I’m
stationary.
Rose: “He’s a real man, even you would agree. I mean
you saw him today, he’s definitely the type thatwould have
any man questioning their sexuality. Youknow what? I
think he has an older brother, maybe he can hook you two
up. He’s rich as well, I’m sure you won’t mind being his
bitch. You’d do anything formoney, I know. No offence
Sabelo, but no woman would ever want you after this. I
stayed because I fellpregnant and had nowhere to go, luck
has finally found me. You’re a loser, I don’t know how I
was able to put up with you all these years.”

My head is spinning, my ears are ringing. I think I lose

track of reality because the next thing Rose is on the floor
screaming and I’m pounding her like fat
cake dough. You can say I’m blinded by rage, heartbreak
or whatever you want to call it. I don’t know anything
anymore. All I know is that I want herto shut up, I don’t
want to hear the insults to any further extent. I don’t
want to listen to her mocking laugh and I want my heart
to stop cracking.

Her screams and cries for help are background noise, I

can’t heed them, even though I want to. Mylogic has
been overtaken by something dark, something that is
beyond me.

---
To be continued…

****

“Shit, shit, shit” He slams his hand on the steering wheel

in frustration. “Randall, Styles is… he’s…” Thewords are
right at the tip of my tongue, but I’m
unable to speak. Styles is one of the strongest people I
know, he’s more cautious than a lionesspreying on a
deer.
“No, he’s fine. I know my boy… he’s fine.” I can hearpain
in his voice.
“Who were those men? Why did they start shooting?”I
need answers, but I don’t see this man giving themto me.
This is how he’s always been, secretive and indifferent.
He briefly grimaces at me and continuesdriving without
providing me with an answer.

*Road To Royalty* Coming soon…

“FORTY EIGHT”

-SABELO ZULU

How do I do it? How do I move on without my wife? Iloved

that woman, I loved her to death and gave hereverything I
could. I didn’t have much, but I gave her everything I could.
I should have known that Rose would be my downfall, I
should’ve known that she would turn against me like our
souls were never connected to begin with.

Look at me, stuck in a prison cell after battering my wife

almost to death. I don’t know what happened tome, but I
lost it. I wasn’t thinking when I attacked her,I would never
hurt my wife, not intentionally. Rose ismy life, she’s the
only one for me.

“Eita warden.”
I call for the guard, he scowls at me while taking his
time to stroll towards the cell.

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“What?”
Arrogant fool, he’s lucky I’m behind bars.
Me: “I want to make a call.”
He snorts at my plea, what is wrong with blackpeople?
Don’t tell me, he didn’t hear what I said.
“You want to make a call? You’re not asking to makea
call?”
Eish, I forget these people think they are related to
Mandela because they are on the other side of thebars.
Me: “May I please make a call... boss.”
The idiot grins.
“Good, that’s how you beg and because you were rude at
first the answer is no. You will be granted one phone call
tomorrow and that’s if I’ll be in a goodmood.”
Me: “What about my rights? I have the right to makea
call.”
“And who will you complain to, tell me? You’re a
prisoner, no one cares about you.”
He mocks me and walks away, I have to find out howRose
is doing. When the neighbours came and pulled me away
from her, she wasn’t moving. What ifI killed my wife? I
will never forgive myself.

Me: “Warden, please. I need to know if my wife isokay.

I need to know if she’s alive.”
The stupid guard does not heed my shouts, there isno
peace in this country.
“Hiabo ndoda, usuyakhala manje.” (You’re crying
now?”
There’s a fool laughing behind me, I am in no moodfor
criminals.
Me: “Voetsek lala, jou hond.” (Piss off and go tosleep,
you dog.)
He raises his hands in surrender and pivots away from my
deadly glare. Who will I call to get me out ofhere? My
brother has turned against me, I doubt he
will lend a helping hand. I have no one left.

*****

“Please eat.” Tears dance down her face as these words

remind her of her son, today she is pleading with her
husband who hasn’t eaten anything in days.He’s slowly
fading into oblivion that mom has to forget about herself
and take care of him. Losing herhusband as well would
surely send her to her grave.
“When will you stop crying?” Sam’s father queries,worry
unashamed in his tone.
His hand reaches for his wife’s cheek to wipe her tears
away, she shakes her head and that has moretears
trailing down her face.
“When you start eating.” Her voice is raspy from allthe
crying she’s been doing, the funeral is in threedays and
she’s been struggling with nightmares since they chose
a coffin for Sam. Images of him drenched in his own
blood, laying in a coffin haunt
her dreams, she would wake up covered in sweat and
tears and cry till morning. Sam’s father is awareof it,
damn he wishes he could carry her burdens.
Nevertheless, there is only so much he can carry.

“I will eat the day our enemy has been punished.”“Do

you want to press charges?”
“No.” Sam’s dad shakes his head, he doesn’t deem that
enough a punishment. “Our hearts have been ripped out
and trampled on, I want to rip their hearts out as well. I
want them to feel what we feel. Only then will I be at
peace.” His voice is void of sympathy.

Mom wants to dispute, however she is not strong enough

for any clashes. Her head is not in its right space, she
can only pray that whatever her husbandis planning will
not get him into trouble.

-NELLY PAGE
The past weeks have been foggy, the kids are so quiet
that it worries Nelly. She would ask them butfears what
their answers would be, deep down sheknows that
Bhekifa has everything to do with it.
Maybe they heard the conversation the day their
father disowned them and the news is still
processing.
Nelly wants to make it up to them, a trip maybe.
Nevertheless, work is hectic. She hardly has time for
herself.

Pulling up in the driveway, Nelly spots a figure through

her peripheral vision. Curiosity holds on asshe trails her
eyes to the right, to inspect. It’s a bit dark and so she
can’t really see who the person lurking outside her yard
is. Her heart clenches, she thinks of calling Nkateko, but
he is so far away rightnow. It will take him forever to get
to her. The policeare certainly not an option.

Okay, don’t panic Nelly.

She tries to keep calm, it’s not working especially now
that the person has turned and is looking rightat her.
Nelly would drive out and dash to a safer place, but her
body is numb. All she can do is stareat the person.
Fearing for her life, something snaps her back to normality.
Could be her kids, could be the will to live.She knows she
will die if she doesn’t move. Just as Nelly turns the car on
and changes gears. The figurecomes running towards her in
full speed, it’s too fastthat she loses sense of thinking. Once
again, her hands are frozen along with her brain.
She stares with wide eyes at the person running towards her
vehicle. The person has an odd looking body, they are
wearing a mask over their head. Nelly can’t tell if it is male
or female, but whoever it is, is carrying a brick. A scream is
heard, only it is not hers.The voice could be belonging to a
male, however voices do not guarantee the gender of a
person.
A brick is smashed through window where Nelly is
located, she ducks while screaming for help. Her hands
have gone to cover her head, they are shaky as well as her
body. Seconds go by, they turn to minutes while Nelly is
drenched in fear and utter silence. She can’t stay there the
whole day now, canshe? So she says a little hushed prayer
and slowly raises her head, the first thing she is met with
is a broken window. Shards of glass and the brick seated
on her lap.

Of course the next logical thing to do is call for help…

the police, Ramaphosa is too busy for the country… I
mean Nkateko is busy at work, he probably won’t take
her calls. As she carefully shoves the shards of glass off
her lap, a white pieceof paper is revealed. With shaky
hands, Nelly picks itup. She scans her surroundings for the
intruder. Shecould run into the house and lock herself in
there, but what if the trespasser is in the house.
She decides to call Bheki Cele; pardon me! She decides to
call the police. Like many South Africans,Nelly is told a
bunch of lies… Oops! Here I go again…The police assure
her they are on the way after asking her a million
irrelevant questions.
Curiosity has not left her side after the call, graduallyshe
opens the note and what is plastered on it brings her
world to a standstill. The sender cut out words from a
magazine of some sort and carefully pasted them on
paper.

‘There’s a coffin reserved for everyone in this dark

world, sad how some of us have to lay in it soonerthan
others.”

Wasting no time, a shaken Nelly grabs her phone and

dials the number of the one person who makesher feel
safe. Busy or not, he has to answer.
“Nkatanga, what are we having for supper? I was
thinking since the kids are not home, we could goout.
You need a break from cooking.”
“Co- Come home now, please.” An unsteady voice,Nelly
pleads. Nkateko senses the fear in her voice,all of him
stands at attention.
“What’s wrong, Nkatanga? Are you okay?”
“There’s someone in the yard Nkateko, they
smashed my car with a brick. What if... Nkateko,what
if...”
“Please tell me, you’re okay.” Nelly could hear him
wheezing, he must be running.
“I’m scared of getting out of the car, I don’t know ifthey
are still around.”
“I’m on my way baby, stay in the car and lock the
doors.” Like she is brave enough to go snooping,
besides, the window is broken. She might as well be
standing outside. The police are not there yet, she knew
calling them was a waste of time. You have tobe a special
somebody to get attention from the men in blue.

Nelly awaits her lover. It takes more or less than a

second before the back doors of her SUV swing open,
already terrified and alert, Nelly lets out a blaring
scream and her head snaps back to check who the
persons are. Just as she does that, the driver’s door
opens and a man in a balaclava standsbefore her with a
gun aimed at her.
“Voetsek, shifta sfebe.” (Move.) His voice is hoarse,
unpleasant to the ear. Her life flashes before her, she
screams horrifically, but a gun is pressed to hertemple.
Instinctively, her hands rise in defence andsurrender.
“I said move.” The same man whisper yells, roughly
pushing Nelly to the passenger’s seat. She managesto
scoot her trembling body there, heart racing a hundred
miles, head spinning from confusion and fear. Nelly
panics as the man in a mask starts the car and drives out
of her yard.

“Pl… Please… y… you can take everything… Just let me

go.” She cries for her life, she’s too loud for thesethree
men and they are exasperated by the noise.
The two in the back have not said anything and Nellyis
oblivious of who they are.
“Leave the begging for later, sweet stuff.” The driver
spits in a mockery tone which sends cold shivers all
through her body. She’s not stupid, she knows what
happens when you’re hijacked or kidnapped rather.
Thoughts of being molested invade her mind, she can’t
fathom them hence the scream that leaves hermouth.
She grabs the steering wheel, she too has no idea why.
What she knows is that she can’t let them get anywhere
with her, if an accident were to happen due to her dire
decision then so be it. Struggling withthe driver, Nelly
leans in to bite his hand. A chunk is enough to send the
man screaming as the pain shoots through his body.
“You bitch,” his back hand smashes against Nelly’scheeks.
As she falls back on the seat, her hair is roughly pulled
from the back. She shouts and grabs the hands that are
tightly gripped on her hair, kicking and
screaming. The road they are travelling on seems awfully
quiet that no matter how much she screamsor fights, no
one will come to her aid. That's it... having had enough of
her dramatics and highly annoyed, the driver hits her on
the head with a gun,causing her to fall unconscious.

---
To be continued…

*****

I feel this unexplainable, excruciating emotional painand a

big lump on my throat forcing its way out. It suffocates
me to the point that I have to chase my breath. I’ve felt
pain before, in fact, all my life. It had become my daily
bread that I even made friends withit, it loved me dearly
and refused to depart from me. The kind of pain I feel
today is different, it mocks and abuses me, telling me that
it will never leave
until it snatches my soul from my body.

Road To Royalty… Coming soon-

“FORTY NINE”

The deafening sound of a train wakes Nelly from her

unconscious state. She groans as she flicks her eyes open
and is met by darkness and a throbbing headache.
Instantly, Nelly is aware of the cold objectshe’s seated on
and realises her hands are tied behind her back when she
tries to move. Where havethose people brought her? What
are they planning todo with her?
She blinks a couple of times until her eyes adjust tothe
darkness, the room she’s in is small with no windows.
Her eyes search for anything to get herselfloose from the
ropes.
Before she could grasp everything, Nelly hears footsteps
outside the door and male voices. Two men walk in, one
has soft facial features you’d swear he wouldn’t hurt a fly
while his accomplice looks like he’d slit her throat without
blinking twice.The soft looking one grins coly as his eyes
meet hers, the grin is bone-chilling, it has Nelly shivering
with fear.

“Welcome back sisi,” she recognises the voice of thegentle

looking guy, it’s definitely the bastard who struck her on the
head with a gun.
“Why am I here? What do you want with me?” Her
question is rushed, she needs answers. The menlaugh
like the idiots they are.
“The boss sure has an eye for good women, look at you.”
Okay this one seems to be the one in charge, he should
definitely get out of this business. Find a wife and build a
family for himself, then again as he gets closer, his eyes
sell him off. There is somethingeerie about them, he bends
over and grabs her chin.
“Beautiful,” the man whispers close to her ear beforehis
eyes lustfully run down her body. She shivers with disgust.
“I didn’t do anything, let me go please.” She pleads,but
they seem to find joy in her desperation.
“Relax sisi, your lover boy is the one we want and the
fast way to get him is if we have you.” An evil grin
appears on his face, he releases her cheek leaving a
throbbing pain behind. Her eyes widen, Nelly is shocked
by the revelation. What could they possibly want with her
innocent Nkateko? That man is as pure as holy water. Her
eyes chase the scary lookingguy guarding the door to find
him sneering at her.

“What do you want with Nkateko? He didn’t do

anything…” Her speech is halted by an evil chuckle.
“You’ll find out soon enough, just a little more timeand
lover boy will come looking for you, or maybe not. In a
way we’re helping you, kind of like a test. Ifhe comes
through, then you’ll know he loves you, ifnot then… ouch
askies.”
The same guy receives a call, he rams his hand in the
pocket of his pants and comes out with a phone.
“Boss.” His eyes are glued on Nelly, her mind is blankas
who the boss might be. Nkateko’s life was a rollercoaster
before they met and there is a possibility he might have
made enemies along the
way. “We’re coming.”

A coy smile pulls up at his lips after dropping the call.

“Shine sisi shine, it appears someone loves you. Youare a
good bait.” The man laughs and lightly slaps her on the
cheek, she winces at the impact.
The two goons follow each other out the door,
leaving Nelly with the piercing silence.
Now that she is left by herself, her mind entertains many
things. Nothing should happen to Nkateko, nothim. He is
her life, she’s so used to having him around that she
doesn’t know how she’ll live withouthim.
Time is not on her side, if she could find somethingto cut
the ropes, she’ll make it out in time to warn Nkateko.
Nelly scans the room for anything to use,those bloody
idiots were so careful, the room is clean of any sharp
objects. Out of frustration she tries to scoot the chair
towards the door hoping it’snot locked.
She manages to move a little closer, but what will she do
when she gets out? They will probably see her. As she
continues her escape plan, the door slowly opens and her
heart hammers away in her chest. The woman standing
before her kind of looksfamiliar, she can’t place together
who she is.
“Nelly?” Her eyes are wide as though she’s shockedto see
Nelly tied up.
“Help me, please.” A woman ought to feel sorry forher,
right? “They kidnapped me and tied me up, I need to go
back to my kids; they need me.”

“Oh my God, I knew he was obsessed but to do this.”The

lady complains as she hurries to untie a baffledNelly.
“Who are you talking about?” Nelly’s curiosity can
never be left behind, the lady steps back after
succeeding to untie her.

“You need to get out of here before he finds you.”

There is urgency in her voice, she sounds terrifiedand
her eyes keep chasing the open door.
“Nkateko is here, I can’t leave him behind.” Nelly hopes
the lady would be able to help since she seems to know
the kidnapper. The lady battles withwhatever is in her
mind, it’s written in her eyes. Nellyanxiously waits for her
answer, as her mouth opens to plead for help again, the
woman grabs her hand and runs with her out the door.

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They enter a dark narrow hallway, the floor is wet and

there’s a foul smell. She can’t make out if it’s arat that
died or a dog, however that is far from her worries.
Who is this woman and why is she so benton helping
her? It feels like forever since they haveentered the
corridor, they finally come to the end.
The two women are welcomed by sounds of
gunshots and darkness.
The woman stops and pulls Nelly to a corner, their hearts
are racing faster than the sounds of gunshots.Nelly can’t
recognise the place, there are tall
buildings around, she can’t see further than that.
“The exit is that way,” the lady points to her far left,she
looks at a terrified Nelly after. “There’s a road not far
from here, you might get a ride. I’ll keep himdistracted,
just in case he finds you gone.”
“What about Nkateko? He’s out there, those men said
they want him.” She’s not about to leave withouther
Nkatanga.
“There’s nothing you can do for him, those men are
fighting with guns and by the sounds of it, Nkatekois not
alone. Please go.” The woman says.
“Come with me, I don’t know this place.” Nelly.

The woman lets out an exasperated sigh, a frown builds

on her facial features. Nelly thinks she will change her
mind about helping, instead she grabs her hand again
and takes off running with her. Theystay close to the
wall, they haven’t seen anyone where they are but
gunshots are still as loud.
“Who is this man you keep talking about?” Nelly
questions while running beside the woman.

“Nelly.” Her heart stops along with her feet at the sound
of his voice, swiftly, she turns and seeing himstanding
there brings tears to her eyes. He looks likehe’s been
through hell and back, his face is coveredin sweat.

Nkateko is in a panicky mode, he didn’t think he would

ever find Nelly. He had to seek help from hisfriends,
finding her location was not hard though. Itwas the
thought of finding her dead that tormentedhim. However
he was afraid that he might get theretoo late and now
that he’s standing before his beloved, his heart can beat
better.

At the distance between them, the two glance at each

other. There is a deep yearning to be in each other’s
arms. While Nkateko yearns to protect Nellyfrom the
world, Nelly yearns to find shelter in his arms. She
craves the safety only he can give her.
She is still a bit shaken, however seeing him, easesthe
tension and fear tugging at her.
“Nkatanga.” He’s just a few feet from her when he calls
her by this beautiful name he dubbed her with,one she
has grown to love. Just a few more feet from each other,
Nkateko opens his arms to welcome her under his wing
where she feels safe and undone.

The sound of a gunshot interrupts the moment, thisone is

too loud as if fired at close range. Nelly freezes on the
spot, Nkateko as well and that’s afterhis body took a slight
jolt. Eyes widened, bodies stiffand hearts pounding hard in
their ribcages. Yet theireyes still refuse to look anywhere
else, but at each other.
No one can detect where the gunshot came from. A lone
tear escapes Nkateko’s eye, the second eye releases one
as well. Nelly can see the trail of his tears as he’s
standing under a beam of light, she canonly wonder why
he’s crying. She attempts to ask as
her mouth slightly opens, but she is stopped by another loud
sound of a gunshot, at this Nkateko gasps loudly, his body
takes another jolt and he fallsknee first.

“NOOO!!!” The woman who helped her escape screams, it

is only now that Nelly realises what ishappening.
“NKATEKO!!!” A horrific scream surges from Nelly's
lips. Two more shots are heard, blood bubbles out of
Nkateko’s mouth. Her world comes to a standstill, she
scuttles to him and catches him before his headhits the
ground. It all feels like a movie or a terrible nightmare to
put it lightly. He’s been shot from the back, however she
doesn’t look for the culprit. She needs to keep her eyes on
the man she loves, lest hebreathes his last while she’s not
watching.

“NKATEKO.” Nelly yelps again as she positions

herself on the ground before laying his upper bodyon
her lap. There is so much blood, she can’t tell
where it’s oozing out of. His mouth too is covered in
blood, he opens it to speak, but is unable to. Tears trickle
down the corners of his face as he glances upat Nelly with
bloodshot eyes, he’s groaning in pain and it’s slowly
becoming hard to breathe.
“WHAT HAVE YOU DONE BHEKIFA?” Nelly hears the
woman who rescued her scream, she turns to see horror
painted on her face, her eyes looking far ahead. Nelly
follows them and her heart drops whenshe sees Bhekifa
with a gun aimed at her and Nkateko. How did she miss
that? How did she not see him coming? She could have at
least warned Nkateko.
“I will deal with you later, Cheryl.” Bhekifa howls, he’s
angry, boiling to the extreme.

---
To be continued…
“FIFTY”
SEASON FINALE-

NELLY PAGE-

It’s been there for a while now, this anger, escaping when
Bhekifa comes to mind. I swallowed it when my kids
smiled at me, they unconsciously helped meback to sanity.
Little did I know I was drinking the anger like a pill and
so it has grown in my belly and now it has come out as
hot as hell itself. I’m glaringup at the man I was once
married to and all I can think about is how fate has been
unfair to me that I crossed paths with him.

“Don’t look at me like that Nelly, you know why I did

this.” He says and I am dumbfounded. I want to scream,
shout and throw anything at him. Lord I want to squeeze
the life out of him.
I feel something wet brush against my cheek, it’s
Nkateko caressing my cheek with his bloodied hand.
“Nk- Nkata…nga.” Blood spurts out of his mouth ashe
calls me, my heart bleeds along with his wounds.
“Stay with me, baby please.” I can’t lose him, not likethis.
“Call an ambulance please.” The plea goes outto Cheryl,
but Bhekifa aims his gun at her.
“I won’t hesitate to shoot you, Cheryl.”
“Please don’t do this Bhekifa.” Her voice is saturatedin
fear

“I… I’m… so… sorry.” Nkateko.

“No, no… please don’t leave me. I will marry you, I will
have your kids. Just don’t leave me, Nkateko plea…”
“T-tell me… how to… make y-your heart stop hurting.”He
says wiping my stubborn tears, this is not what Iwant. I
want him, I need him to live.
“Don’t go… don’t… leave, please.” No one ever
prepared me for this, the day I will lose my heart, theday it
will stop beating. He’s giving up on me, I see itin his eyes.
“Can… I… meet you… in the next life…time? Pro…mise
you will be… my wife.” He painfully pushes the wordsout
and my heart clips with each syllable.
“We can do it now Nkateko, I’ll marry you… baby, I’ll be
your wife and give you as many children as you want.”
Life does not love me, how can one be exposed to such
sorrow? More blood ooze out of hismouth when he
coughs, I use my top to wipe it away.
Nkateko forces a smile, it feels like the last. His eyes
deeply looking into mine, I feel the stare from deep in my
soul. My head spins when they slowly close.

“Nkateko, Nkateko open your eyes.” No, no, no. God

please no, not him. My loud cries fill the vast
surroundings, I can’t breathe. God I want to die, I can’t
take this pain.
“Help him, please Bhekifa. Let me take him to the
hospital.” I’m screaming at him, but there is no
remorse on his face. His eyes are as cold as thisnight.
“No one is going anywhere.” He seethes.
“What do you want from me?”
“Don’t you get it Nelly? This was the plan, I told youthis
world is too small for us both. You weren’t supposed to
find out that I was behind his death, I don’t know how
Cheryl found out about my plan andfollowed me here. I
guess I will have to kill everyone,a man like me can’t go to
jail. Don’t worry, I will take care of our children.”

“Bhekifa please.”
“NO, NO!” He shouts. “You ruined me, Nelly. All I
wanted was for you to give me, my rightful place inyour
life. But you chose him, you chose this loser over me,
the man who loved you when you knew nothing about
love.”
“What are you talking about? You ruined yourself, I chose
myself. I chose my kids.” How dare, he put hismiseries on
me.
“This is the problem, you’ve always been a selfishbitch.”
He shouts and roughly rubs his head, I’ve seen many
versions of him. But this is the craziest
I’ve seen so far, it is as if something dark has takenover him.
“Bhekifa let her go, baby please let’s go home.” I
almost forgot about Cheryl, she hasn’t moved fromher
spot. The fear in her eyes is the one I had whenBhekifa
would begin his possessive drama.
“I said no one is going anywhere.” He yelps at her.
“How did you find me Cheryl? How did you know I
would be here?”
“I followed you, I heard you talking about the
kidnapping over the phone. I knew someone was in
trouble, I just didn’t know who.”
“What right did you have to follow me? You have
ruined my plans.” Bhekifa.
“What did you have me do? You were losing your mind
and I had to make sure you don’t get yourselfinto
trouble, but it was too late when I got here.
There was a gun fight, that’s when I decided to go
snooping and found Nelly. She’s the mother of your
children, how could you do this?” Cheryl is wastingher
breath, Bhekifa does not care. This man does
whatever the hell he wants.

“You should have stayed home and waited for me,now I

will have to kill you too.” The bastard nonchalantly
says, the devil definitely lent him his heart, that’s if he
has one.
“Bhekifa, please.” Cheryl.
She reminds me of myself when I was under his spell,
the Nelly that loved Bhekifa and thought shecould fix
him.

“I’m done talking to you,” he dismisses her with these

words, anyone would be petrified when facingdeath. “Get
up Nelly.”
This is it, today is my last day. My gaze falls on Nkateko
who is still in my arms, he looks so peaceful as if he’s
sleeping. If this is a dream, Lordwake me up right now.
My eyes are closed as I saythis prayer, when I open them,
I’m still in the dark, holding my lover’s body and Bhekifa
still has a gun
aimed at me. I never thought he would unravel andlose
his mind.
Placing one last kiss on Nkateko’s forehead, my tears
rain down his face. This is no fairy tale, tears don’t work
like that. I can only hope he feels my painand comes back
to me.
“I’m sorry my love, this is all my fault. Please forgiveme.”
I hug him tight, as if letting go would render melifeless.

“Okay, that’s enough.” Bhekifa snaps, before his hand

furiously pulls me up. He’s lugging me towardsa building.
“Let me cover his face at least, please.” Nkateko deserves
this, I can’t leave his body exposed like that.“Bhekifa wait,
just wait.”

I’m screaming, although he has a gun pressed on mytemple.

He snubs my cries, my feet refuse to move with him but he
continues to pull me towards the
building.
“BHEKIFA!” He stops at Cheryl’s voice calling out to
him and turns me around with him. Cheryl is standing
next to Nkateko’s body, a gun aimed at us. Idon’t know
how to feel about this.
“What are you doing?” Bhekifa yells at hers.“I
can’t let you do this?”
“Cheryl, put the gun down.”
“NO.”
“Are you sure you want to do this? It’s me, Cheryl.The
man you love, your Zulu man.” Typical.
He sounds stupid pleading, then again, I know he’s
faking mercy.
“Let her go Bhekifa and take me home, we’ll pretendthis
never happened.” Cheryl.

“Yes, I swear I won’t tell anyone.” I add.

This is what happens when you’re desperate, you lie.This
man will rot in jail, I swear to God.
“SHUT UP!!!” He screams in my ear as he presses the
gun on my temple. I would flinch and wail, but I can’t feel
anything right now. My heart is frozen. “Put that fucking
gun away, Cheryl.” At this point it’seither kill or be killed,
both Cheryl and Bhekifa have guns. He would shoot her
on the spot, but there is something daring about this
woman. The look in hereyes says she won’t hesitate to
shoot Bhekifa if he were to shoot her.
“How the hell will you survive without me? Who is going to
pay for your children’s tuition? Your lifestyle?Will you go
back to being a cleaner?” He is manipulating her and this
man has graduated at the school of manipulation, she
seems to be rethinking her decision.

Her hands are trembling, she might miss and shootme if

she’s that nervous.
“I love you, Cheryl, you know I love you, right? This has
nothing to do with you, I’m not in love with Nelly
anymore.” The Bastard.
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“Then, why are you doing this?” Good question

Cheryl, I want to know as well.
“It wasn’t planned, I only wanted to get Nkateko here.Nelly
was not supposed to know that I’m behind this, but now that
she knows, I can’t let her go. She will send me to jail baby,
how will you live without me? I know you can’t live without
me just like I can’t live without you.” This is actually
working, Bhekifa is getting through to her. Her eyes are
softening. “Now I’m going to walk away and you’re going to
follow me,okay baby?”

Just as I feared, Cheryl gradually lowers the gun. This

man beside me sighs in relief. He turns me around with
him and continues with the escapade. Iwill die without
seeing my kids, my parents.
We have barely taken three steps and another gunshot
echoes, everything happens so fast that I almost miss
Bhekifa falling flat on his face with a bullet wound on his
lower back. I quickly turn to Cheryl and Oh my God, she
actually did it. Her hands
are trembling and eyes on Bhekifa. She drops the gun,
falls to her knees and covers her face. I think she’s
crying, her shoulders are moving. My whole body feels
numb, but I need to check if she is okay.

She shows me her face covered in tears, fear in hereyes.

“I- Is he… dead?” Her voice cracks.
“I think so, he hasn’t moved.” He better be dead. “Areyou
okay?”
“I killed him… I killed Bhekifa.” She bursts into tears,
never thought I’d be seen comforting my ex- husband’s
girlfriend for killing him. Life you son of agun. I find
myself crying with her after my eyes lendon Nkateko’s
body. It hurts so bad that I can’t breathe, life can’t be so
cruel to treat me this way. Ihave lost so much already, I
have nothing more to give.

*****
“I only had you for a second, now you’re gone. How do I
go on without you? I miss you, Nkateko. I reallymiss your
warm touch on my skin. Your whispers inmy ear, your
clinginess and how your eyes would sparkle when you
look at me.” A hand on my shoulder has me turning
around. “What are you doing here?”

The last time I saw Cheryl was eight months ago, thenight
she rescued me. She wouldn’t stop apologising for what
Bhekifa had done, it’s merely not her fault.
We’ve been talking over the phone, that night actually
brought us closer. Bhekifa is paying for hissins in hell, I
hope the fire increases every second.
When the police came we told them we were both
kidnapped and there was a fight between the men who
came to rescue us and Bhekifa’s men. Self- defence is not
justified in this country, she surely was going to spend
time had she confessed. I owedher my life.
Bhekifa was buried a week after. I couldn’t bring myself
to go to his funeral, the kids were taken by Bhekifa’s
family for a week, saying they are Zulu kids,they had to be
at the funeral. I wanted nothing to with the Zulus, I will
never forgive Bhekifa for what he took from me.

“Your mother told me, you’d be here.” She says.

I come here every day without fail. I miss him so much
and I still want to spend more time with him, Istill want to
tell him how much I love him. I still wantto feel his
passionate kisses, touch him and get lostin his presence.
This is the closest I can get.
“I’m leaving town, I thought I should say goodbye.”
She’s been talking about this for some time now, I didn’t
think she meant it. Bhekifa didn’t have her in his will, all
his asserts were left to his children. Victorbeing the eldest
is the beneficiary, I haven’t told them about their father’s
will yet. They are too smallto grasp that.
Speaking of Victor, he wrote Sam’s parents a heartfelt
apology letter. He got his uncles to go withhim, I was
proud of my son. For the first time he showed maturity
and remorse towards the terrible incident. He visits Sam’s
grave from time to time, hisparents were surprisingly
forgiving.

“Where are you going to go?” I ask.

“I got a job in Eastern Cape, I’ll be starting in two
weeks. That will give me time to settle in and getused
to the environment.”
“Are you all moving there?”
“My mother will stay here with the kids, I need to work
for my kids. Besides them, there is nothing for me here.
Almost every place I go to reminds me of…”She stops
seeing how uncomfortable the path she’staking is making
me, I’m not ready to talk or hear about Bhekifa. “I’m
sorry, if I knew he was talking about you that night on the
phone. I would have warned you, Nkateko would still
be...”
“There is no use in crying over spilt milk.” I interject.
“What’s done is done.” Although my heart continues to
hurt. Cheryl pulls me into a brief random hug. It’s these
stupid tears, they won’t stop flowing down myface.

“We’re going to be okay,” she says, wiping them away.

I’m not sure I will be okay, it still hurts as the day I last
looked into his eyes. She bids me goodbyeand leaves me
alone to talk to my Nkatanga.

The sun is going to set soon, I’ve been here sincemorning.

“The thought of going back home where you are not there
is unbearable. I would do anything to fall asleep in your
arms again, to listen to the sound of your heartbeat. You
have no idea how it calmed my chaotic mind. The
security you gave me when I waswrapped in your arms,
every night I sleep with your t-shirt on. It still smells like
you, I haven’t washed anyof your clothes. I can’t wash
away your scent Nkateko, I’m afraid I will start to forget
you if I do.”
My knees wobble, I’m crying again. I let the tears do
whatever they want. They suffocate me when I holdthem
back.

“I can still taste the last kiss you gave me that morning
before you went to work. I can still see howyour eyes
screamed out how much you loved me and I can still feel
your hands carefully caress every inch of my skin.” The
pain is overwhelming, I cannotbe subjected to such agony.
It’s not fair, why does God give when he will take back
along the way?

“Every night before I go to bed, I pray that you come to me

in my dreams. Didn’t God give you, my message baby?
Didn’t he tell you that I asked for you?Just a glimpse of you
is all I ask. He should have at least whispered that to you,
I’m upset with him and you for leaving me. There’s this
emptiness inside of me and I’m so tired. Living without you
is torture, it’s your memories that linger in me; they hurt
me.
Everyone is telling me to move on, to wait on God,
but I can’t let you go. I tried, I promise I tried.”

This is my life now, living with his memories and

sobbing because of the pain of not being able to bewith
him. I’m suddenly whisked up by strong arms,not
knowing who it is, I fight and squirm. Tears areblinding
me and I have to blink them away to see who has
scooped me up as if I weigh baby weight.

“Dadewethu, it’s me. I’m here now, I’m here.”

Thokozani? My vision clears, the first thing I see arehis
sad eyes looking down at me.
“Zaza?” He nods, sits me on his lap as he settles down
and holds me tight. As if the stupid tears knowI’m a baby
when he’s with me, they throw a party onmy face. “Where
have you been? It hurts… Zaza, it hurts so bad…”
He holds me closer to his chest.
“Let’s go home Nelly, this is no place for you. You will
go crazy if you stay here.” Mama must have told
him this is where I live now.

“Please let me stay a little more, I can’t leave him alone

here.” I plead, I know it sounds stupid, but my heart is
convinced that Nkateko is as lonely as I am.He feels my
absence when I’m not here.
“Nkateko would want you to take care of yourself.” That
doesn’t make the pain any less. I hide my face in his chest
and cling on to him, he’s rocking me back and forth.
Thokozani is so stubborn that he willtake me away from
this place, I don’t want to go away from Nkateko. He
needs me, he was there for me when I needed him and I
need to do the same forhim.

“I will dry your tears now dadewethu, you don’t haveto

suffer anymore. Your brother is here now and I won’t
leave you again.” I believe him and my heart seems to
find a little solace in his words. I will be okay, I have to
be okay for my kids. “Let’s go homenow, ubaba and
Qhawekazi are waiting for you.”
He stand us up and places me down, my face is stillhidden in
his chest. I will crumble if I look back, my heart always
breaks when I have to leave Nkateko inthis place.

“Nka- Nkatanga.” A raspy voice calls, I must be hearing

things. It’s been like this for the past eight months, his voice
is stuck in my head that I hear it when he’s not really calling
me. I don’t look back, it’sconfirmed, I have lost my mind.
“Nkat- tanga.”

Thokazani stops, I do too. He looks down at me, eyes wide

and probing. I think he heard what I heard,I’m afraid to
turn around. My brother is brave, I’m looking at his face
when he turns, waiting to see if I have completely lost it.
“Bafo,” he doesn’t have to say it twice. I quickly swivel to
see Nkateko looking at me. He’s trying tosit up from the
hospital bed. My feet fail me, Thokozani catches me
before I sink down.
“Nkateko,” I can only mumble his name, shock has
surfaced and swamped my whole being. The doctors said
there was no chance he might come out of the comma,
they had given up on him. I neverthought I would ever see
him looking back at me.
My brother helps me to the bed, Nkateko
immediately cups my face. His hands are cold, Idon’t
mind. He’s touching me, the same touch I craved for,
for months.
“Hi,” he murmurs leaning his forehead on mine.
“Hi,” mine is accompanied by a stifled sob. His breath
whiffing my skin feels like heaven. “You cameback to me,
you came back.” I cry in his arms, he’s holding me in a
tight embrace.
“I will never leave your side again, Nkatanga.” He
says.
I believe him, he came back for me. This is where I want to
be for the rest of my life, in his arms where Ibelong.

SABELO ZULU-
I remember the day I danced when my mother died,it was
a day like no other. I was so sure I would getthe freedom
I have always wanted, but oh boy was Iwrong. If
someone had told me, I would be nothingwithout that
woman, I would have prevented her death. Look at me
today, alone, miserable and working a crappy job.

“When are you going to stop drinking ntwana?”

Lwandle has a big mouth, this witch of a man actsall
innocent for my liking.
“As long as my life continues to suck.” The tavern is
where I spend most of my time when I’m off from work,
the house is cold and lonely. Rose survived thebrutal
beating, she didn’t press charges and didn’t give any
reasons why. I am glad though, but I miss that woman. If
I knew she was going to leave me one day, I would have
given her love portion.

“Then, you’ll die of alcohol poisoning.”

“Better that than a broken heart.” This man is crazy,
when has alcohol killed anyone? That’s white people’s
things, my heart handles alcohol better thanpain. My
phone beeps, I bet it’s from Cell C. It’s always Cell C
with their never ending promotions or deals, at least they
remember me, I’m so lonely that no one calls or texts me.
“Yeyi!!” My loud exclamation catches the attention of
everyone in the pub, as I can’t hold the excitement, Ipush
my chair back and happily jump to my feet.
Lwandle is shocked, he’s staring inquisitively.
“What happened?”
“I won, I won.” I’m shouting, screaming and jumping.
Heck I don’t know what to do with myself, I never
thought luck would find me again. I really was taking
chances when I played sports bet this morning.
Lwandle grabs my hand, he knows I’m talking about
money. But why is he touching me?

“Don’t touch me,” I push him off, yelling with this bigsmile
on my face that keeps transitioning into shock.
“Don’t touch me, I’m rich, I’m rich.” I jump on the
table and shout for everyone to hear. They must know,
they must know. I’m not a pauper anymore. People are
staring with ‘we don’t care faces.’ Only two or three
clap for me, black people and their jealousy mentality.
This is where witchcraft begins.
Lwandle is dancing, this man is not serious aboutlife.
Unless he is celebrating my luck, it’s fine. Hewon’t
see a cent from me, friends or not. Money knows no
friends.
“We are rich ntwana.” Listen to him… we for what?
“I am rich.” I put emphasis on that. “Uvukile
umalambane.” (I’m back in the game.)
“How much is it twana?” Why does he want to know?I’m
rich that’s all? He’s still happy, someone come and wipe
that 50cent smile off his face.

“20K ntwana,” I tell him anyway. “I won 20k.” His

face changes into a frown, I don’t care. I’m rich.
“Sabelo, 20k does not make you rich.” What did I say
about black people and jealousy mentality?
“Yey, Voetsek. Do you have that kind of money wena?Do
you have it?” He shakes his head. Thought as much.
“Rose, I’m coming baby, your man is coming for you.” I
can’t control my excitement and screams, thisis the best
thing that has ever happened to me.
“It’s only 20K Sabelo, Rose won’t take you with thislittle
money, she’s dating a man with much more.”Why am I
sensing jealousy coming from this guy?It’s too heavy
man, Lwandle is spoiling my mood. Ijump off the table
and head towards the door, I’m not talking to anyone
today. Poor people have always annoyed me anyway, I
don’t belong here.
Sandton, here I come.

“Where are you going?” He’s running behind me, I knew

he wanted my money. He wants me to spend itwith him,
that’s why he keeps telling me, Rose won’ttake me back. I
will show him. “Sabelo…”
“Yeyi, phuma Satan.” (Leave me alone you devil.) I’m
not playing.
“I’m going to get my wife, I’m going to get my wife back.” I
know I’m loud, but who cares. Rose, daddy’scoming for you.

THE END***

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