Alice in Wonderland

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CHAPTER VII

A MAD TEA-PARTY
THERE was a table set out under a tree in front of the house, and the
March Hare and the Hatter were having tea at it : a Dormouse was sitting
between them, fast asleep, and the other two were using it as a cushion,
resting their elbows on it, and talking over its head. “Very uncomfortable
for the Dormouse,” thought Alice ; “only, as it ’s asleep, I suppose it
doesn’t mind. ”The table was a large one, but the there were all crowded
together at one corner of it :“No room ! No room !” they cried out when
they saw Alice coming. “There’s plenty of room !” said Alice indignantly,
and she sat down in a large arm-chair at one end of the table. “Have some
wine,” the March Hare said in an encouraging tone. Alice looked all round
the table, but there was nothing on it but tea. “I don ’t see any wine,” she
remarked. “There isn’t any,” said the March Hare. “Then it wasn’t very
civil of you to offer it,” said Alice angrily. “It wasn’t very civil of you to sit
down without being invited,” said the March Hare.“ I didn’t know it was
your table,” said Alice ; “it’s laid for a great many more than three.” “Your
hair wants cutting,” said the Hatter. He had been looking at Alice for some
time with great curiosity, and this was his first speech. “You should learn
not to make personal remarks,” Alice said with some severity : “it’s very
rude. The Hatter opened his eyes very wide on hearing this; but all he said
was, “Why is a raven like a writing-desk ?” “Come, we shall have some
fun now! ”thought Alice. “I’m glad they’ve begun asking riddles—I
believe I can guess that,” she added aloud. “Do you mean that you think
you can find out the answer to it ?” said the March Hare. “Exactly so,” said
Alice. “Then you should say what you mean,” the March Hare went on. “I
do,” Alice hastily replied; “at least—at least I mean what I say—that’s the
same thing, you know.” “Not the same thing a bit!” said the Hatter. “Why,
you might just as well say that ‘I see what I eat’ is the same thing as ‘I eat
what I see’ !” “You might just as well say,” added the March Hare, “that ‘I
like what I get’ is the same thing as ‘I get what I like’ !” “You might just as
well say,” added the Dormouse, who seemed to be talking in his sleep,
“that ‘I breathe when I sleep’ is the same thing as ‘I sleep when I breathe’!”
“It is the same thing with you,” said the Hatter, and here the conversation
dropped, and the party sat silent for a minute, while Alice thought over all
she could remember about ravens and writing-desks, which wasn’t much.
The Hatter was the first to break the silence.

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