What is Right for Me?

How to Make Important Decisions in Everyday Life

A Step-by-Step Approach

www.samhsa.gov • 1-877-SAMHSA-7 (1-877-726-4727)

Acknowledgements
This publication was prepared for the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) by
Advocates for Human Potential, Inc. under contract number HHSS 283200700038I with SAMHSA, U.S. Department
of Health and Human Services (HHS). Stacey Lesko-Case served as the Government Project Officer.

Disclaimer
The views, opinions, and content of this publication are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the views, opinions,
or policies of SAMHSA.

Public Domain Notice

All material appearing in this publication is in the public domain and may be reproduced or copied without permission from
SAMHSA. Citation of source is appreciated. However, this material may not be reproduced or distributed for a fee without the
specific written authorization of the Office of Communications, SAMHSA, HHS.

Electronic Access and Copies of Publication

This publication may be downloaded from the following Internet World Wide Web site: http://store.samhsa.gov.
Copies can be ordered at http:store.samhsa.gov. Or, please call SAMHSA at 1-877-SAMHSA-7 (1-877-726-4727)
(English and Español).

Recommended Citation
Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration. What is right for me? How to make important decisions in everyday life.
A step-by-step approach. (HHS Pub No. SMA-XX-XXXX). Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration, 2011.

Originating Office
Office of the Associate Director for Consumer Affairs, Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA),
1 Choke Cherry Road, Room 2-1007, Rockville, MD 20850. Phone: 1-800-789-2647. (HHS Pub No. SMA-XX-XXXX). Printed 2011.
Webpage: http://store.samhsa.gov.

This workbook is part of a set of materials designed to promote and support shared decision making in mental health. These materials
include printed descriptive and informational materials, step-by-step decision making workbooks, videos and user guides, worksheets
and tools, tip sheets, podcasts and archived webinars, and an interactive decision aid on using antipsychotic medications as part of a
recovery plan.

All of these materials are available to download at no cost from http://store.samhsa.gov. Print copies, DVDs and CD-ROMs of the
material are available from SAMHSA National Mental Health Information Center at 1-800-789-2647.
About This Workbook
Many decisions are ours alone to make. But we make our best decisions when
we have good information, consider the input of others, and take time to think
through what is most important to us.
Contents
This workbook is part of the Federal Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services
Administration (SAMHSA) project on Shared Decision Making in Mental Health. 2 Introduction
This project provides tools to help people who use mental health services and
people who provide services to have more collaborative and productive conversa- 4 Think
tions about all aspects of a person’s mental health recovery plan.
6 Research

7 Identify Options
Following the steps outlined in the workbook can help you make any 8 Pluses and
important decision in your life, not just decisions about medical care or Minuses
mental health treatment and services.
12 Action
There are several ways you can use the workbook:
14 Ponder
• As a tool to make an important personal decision on your own; 16 Tips for Talking about
• As a guide for talking with someone else about your situation Your Decision
and options;
17 TRIP MAP
• As an aid for making a collaborative or shared decision together Decision Making
with others; Worksheet

• As a way to prepare for meeting with a provider for planning or 20 Resources

decision making about treatment and services.

Additional copies of this workbook, its companion helper workbook,

worksheets, and other materials in SAMHSA’s Shared Decision Making in
Mental Health series can be downloaded from: http://store.samhsa.gov.

1
 Introduction
You make decisions every day about your life, relationships, health care, and services.
Some decisions are easy to make, but others may feel difficult and stressful. These feelings
are natural, but it is hard to make good decisions if the feelings become overwhelming.

You can reduce your stress and make better choices if you use steps to think through your
situation and options. Remember that avoiding making a decision is a kind of decision
itself – and it has consequences, too. Some complicated situations involve more than one
decision. It is helpful to think about them one by one.

This workbook is designed to help you make a decision that you find difficult. It uses a
simple tool called TRIP MAP to walk you through the steps of making a decision.

Here are the steps:

T Think about the problems, pressures, people, and priorities

R Research facts and possible solutions

I Identify options

P Weigh the Pluses and

M Minuses for each option

A Action planning

P Ponder the results of the decision

2
To help you see how the TRIP MAP process works, read Dori’s Story in the blue box
below. As you go through the workbook, you will see more blue boxes that show how
Dori uses the TRIP MAP steps to help her make a decision about her situation.

Dori’s Story
Dori just started working at a restaurant where her friend works, about a mile and
a half from her home. She likes the job, but has to work late some nights. There is
no night bus service, so she worries about her safety walking at night and dealing
with bad weather.

Like a road map, this tool helps you at each turn, for example, by identifying your most
important priorities or weighing the pluses and minuses of each option. You can use the
TRIP MAP tool by yourself or with someone you trust.

You can write in the workbook, use the worksheet at the end, or use the TRIP MAP tool on
a piece of blank paper. You can complete your TRIP MAP at one time, or, like many people,
you can stop and pick it up again later.

You can do your best to get facts and information about your situation and options, but
you may never have complete information about all the possibilities. You may feel uncertain
or worry that you will make the wrong decision. The TRIP MAP tool helps you make the
best decision you can with the information you have.

After you make a decision, you may want to share it with others. This workbook includes
tips for how to do this, especially if others do not agree with your choice. If you find that
your decision turns out not to be the right one for you, the workbook shows how to revisit
and reconsider your choice.

3
 T TRIP MAP
Think
The first step is to stop and think about the situation. There are many
things that will affect your decision. It helps to write down your thoughts
about: the problems, pressures, people, and your priorities. Use the space
provided or a blank sheet of paper.

Dori’s Pressures Problems

With winter coming Most difficult decisions relate to some form of problem or challenge.
soon, Dori is concerned
about walking to and Before making a major decision, it is helpful for you to answer
from work — not just these questions:
at night, but in cold, icy
weather. • What is the problem or situation?
She feels pressured by • What do you want to achieve?
her family to get a job
closer to home. She is • What do you want to stay the same? To change?
leaning toward quitting • Are you leaning toward an option now?
the job, but is willing to
explore other ideas. • Are you open to ideas?

Pressures
Sometimes you have to make a quick decision so you do not miss out
on an opportunity. Other times, you have to act before a certain date.

In thinking about your decision, consider the following:

• What deadlines do you face?

• What are the consequences of not meeting these deadlines?
• Are there other reasons to make a decision by a certain time?
• Are you feeling pressured to choose a specific option? What concerns
do you have about this?

4
 T

People Dori’s People

Most important decisions affect not just the person making the decision, Dori ‘s mother wants
to be involved, but Dori
but also friends, family members, and others.
wants to make this deci-
sion herself. Her decision
In approaching a decision, you should consider: could affect other people,
especially her boss and
• Is the decision completely up to you, or are others involved? her friend. She thinks her
• How do you want to make use of others’ opinions? brother might be a good
resource.
• Who can you talk to about your decision?
• How do you want to involve others in your decision? For example, as a
helper, an advisor, a source of information or support, or as a partner for
making a shared decision?

Priorities
What is most important to you in this decision? Your feelings will help
guide you to make the decision that is right for you. Dori’s Priorities
It is important to me that:
It is useful to rate which priorities are the most important to you in
case you have to make tradeoffs. • I feel safe.
• I get to work on time.
• If there were a “perfect” choice, what would it look like?
• I don’t get sick walking in
• If you cannot have all the things you want, what would you give up and bad weather.
what would you keep?
• I save money for my own
• What are the two most important things on your list? apartment.
• What are the two least important things on your list?
Looking at her list,
Dori feels that safety
is the most important.

5
 R TRIP MAP
Research
Do you know the facts of your situation and what your options are?
Do you know the pluses and the minuses of each of these options?
If not, you need to get more information.

Dori’s Research
Here are some ways to get the information you need:
Dori thinks getting a car
might be an option, but she • Visit a library. There may be books and other resources to help you.
has never owned a car. Her Librarians can help you find useful information.
brother knows a little about
cars. A librarian shows her • Use the Internet. Visit Web sites you can trust. Look for Web sites that
a book about the reliability include reviews from others who have made similar decisions.
of used cars and some Web
• Talk to others. Peers, family, friends, providers, spiritual advisors, and
sites offering used cars for
others may have useful information. Find people who have special
sale. She talks to her friend
knowledge about the topic you are researching. For example, if you
about her ideas, too.
are thinking about buying a used car, you may want to talk to a car
mechanic about which ones have the fewest repairs.

Write down the information you need and where you will get it:

TIP
You can use the blank page at the end of this workbook
to write down what you learn.

6
 I TRIP MAP
Identify Options Dori’s Brainstorm
• Do nothing: keep walking
To make a good decision, identify as many options as possible. It helps to
• Ask to work only when
brainstorm—just write down all the ideas that come to mind, even those the bus runs
that are unusual or seem silly. While brainstorming, do not judge your
ideas, just list them. Any idea is a good idea at this point. Talk to others. • Quit the new job
They may have ideas, too. • Ride with friend
• Buy a used car
• Try to find an apartment
Brainstorm closer to work

List here as many options as you can think of.

Don’t hold back or judge.
TIP
•
• To narrow your options, ask:

• • Do I have all the

information I need about this
• option? If not, where can I
learn more?
•
• • Do I have the money
or resources I need to
• make this work?

• • Does this option depend

on someone else?
•
• Does this option
• help achieve what is
important to me?

• How would this option

affect others who are
Narrow the List important to me?

After considering each brainstorm idea, circle the 3 or 4 ideas that seem • Can I stick with this option?
most practical and doable. Write the circled ideas as your options in the
Plus-Minus Chart on page 10.

7
 P
M TRIP MAP
Pluses and Minuses: Weigh the Options
You now have some practical and doable options. It is time to think about
the pluses (good points) and minuses (bad points) of each one and write
them on a Plus-Minus Chart. Filling out this chart may not give you the
Dori Weighs final answer, but it will help you think about your options and how you
Her Options feel about them.

Dori realizes she has more

options than quitting her
job. She can continue to Some of the pluses and minuses will be more important to you than
walk to work. She can buy others. Your list of priorities from the “Think” step will help you weigh
a used car. She can ride to what matters most.
work with a friend.
In the column labeled “How Important,” use stars to rate how important
She has written her options
each plus and minus is to you.
in the Plus-Minus Chart
(page 9) and listed what
she likes and does not like * One star means it matters very little.
about each option. She ** Two stars means it matters somewhat.
used stars to rate how *** Three stars means it matters a lot.
important these things
are to her.

Option 4, riding with a

friend, has more of what is On the next page is Dori’s Plus-Minus Chart. The blank chart on page 10
important to Dori and less is for you to use. There is another blank Plus-Minus Chart on page 18. You
of what is not important may photocopy these charts and use them as often as you like. You can also
to her. This process helps make your own Plus-Minus Chart on a blank piece of paper.
Dori see that riding to work
with a friend may be her
best option at this time.

8
 Dori’s Plus-Minus Chart: Weigh Your Options
P
M
Pluses How Minuses How
(good things) Important? (bad things) Important?

No cost *** Takes a long time *

Option 1
No change:
Continue to
Get exercise * Weather gets bad ***
walk
Does not feel safe ***
Opportunity to
Option 2 Lose income
Quit job
find something * and job I like
***
better

Reliable ** Expensive to buy ***

Option 3 Costs of gas,
Buy used car
Saves time *** insurance
***

Feels safer *** Could break down **

Do not like
Feels safer *** feeling dependent **
on friend

Option 4
Inexpensive *** May not be reliable **
Ride with
Friend’s car is
friend
Saves time * old and could *
break down

Friendly Mother does

conversation
** not like friend
*

Steps
1. Write your best options on a blank Plus-Minus Chart.

2. List the pluses and minuses of each. List as many as you can think of. Use another
sheet if you need more space.

3. Record how important each plus and minus is to you. One star (*) means that a pro or
con matters very little to you. Two stars (**) means it matters somewhat. Three stars (***)
means it matters a lot to you.

9
P
M

Plus-Minus Chart: Weigh Your Options

Pluses How Minuses How

(good things) Important? (bad things) Important?

Option 1
Do nothing/
Make no
change

Option 2

Option 3

Option 4

Are you leaning toward one option? If so, which one? Write it here:

10
Choose your best option P
M
What does the completed table reveal? Does one option seem to fit your
goals and priorities? If you are leaning toward one option over others, but
not ready to decide, what else do you need to make your decision? TIP
Not deciding is a decision
itself and has pluses and mi-
Still not sure? nuses like other options. If you
feel stuck, get help or support
Did the decision making table help you select your best option? from others.

If you are still having trouble deciding, here are some ideas
that might help:

1. Review why you are making this decision. Look at how you defined
the problem in the “Think” step (page 4). Choose the option that best TIP
helps you meet your goal.

2. Think about what is important to you. Look at your list of priorities Test your decision
from the “Think” step (page 5) and choose the option that helps you
• Talk about it with others.
get what is most important to you. Explain your decision to
someone you trust. Talk
3. Consider tradeoffs. Are you willing to give up something that is about what you saw as
important to you to get something even more important? options and how you
arrived at your decision.
4. Do you need more information? You might need to do more research. Others may offer support
or have useful suggestions.
5. Get more ideas. Maybe there is an option you did not consider.
Review your brainstorm list in the “Identify Options” step (page 7). • Try it on. Ask “What is
Talk with others—they may have fresh ideas or another way of the worst that could
thinking about your options. happen if I choose this
option? Is this likely to
6. Make a “backup” plan. If you are worried about your preferred happen? Am I okay if it
option not working out, it can be helpful to think about what you does?” If you are okay with
the possible outcomes of
would do. For example, if it does not work out riding with a friend,
your decision, it is a good
Dori could still walk. one for you. If not, you may
want to identify more
options and weigh their
pluses and minuses in
When you are comfortable that you have made the best choice for you, another decision chart.
write your decision here:

I have decided:

11
 A TRIP MAP

Action
Dori’s Action Plan Making a decision involves more than just choosing the best option.
You must act on your decision if you want to make a specific change in
Dori decided to ride to work
your life. An action plan will help you follow through, especially if you
with a friend and made this
identify what needs to be done, who does it, when it needs to be done,
Action Plan. Notice that she
and resources you need to do it.
has checked the steps that
are complete.

Here is Dori’s Action Plan. On page 13 is one for you to use.

There is another blank Action Plan on page 19.

Dori’s Action Plan to: Ride to work with a friend

Step What Who When Completed

Talk to friend about the

1. decision. Make sure it is still OK Dori & friend As soon as possible ❒
with friend.

2. Agree on Dori’s share of gas. Dori & friend As soon as possible ❒

Agree on a schedule and a
3.
start date.
Dori & friend As soon as possible ❒
Make a backup plan for times
4.
when friend cannot drive.
Dori After agreements are made ❒
5. Meet at agreed place and time. Dori & friend After agreements are made ❒
Resources: Home phone number or e-mail for friend; money to pay for gas; convenient place to
meet; another way to get to work if friend is not available

12
 A
Action Plan to:
Step What Who When Completed

1. ❒

2. ❒

3. ❒

4. ❒

5. ❒

Resources:

TIP
Keep your plan simple and doable. Write the action steps in the order they need to be done.

13
 P TRIP MAP

Dori’s Decision Ponder

If Dori’s friend decides
to quit her job, Dori How did your decision work out?
would no longer have a
ride to work. Dori would You made your decision with the best information you had at the time.
need to revisit her But decision making is often an ongoing process, and circumstances can
options for getting to change. Sometimes your decision does not work out as you had hoped.
work and make another
In most cases, you can make another decision to try something else.
decision: walk, find
another person to ride
with, or buy a used car.

Or maybe Dori gets a If things did not turn out as you expected, it does not mean that you
raise at work, so buying have failed. This is often part of the process. We may revisit decisions
a used car will not be so many times as we learn new information or as our situation changes.
hard on her budget. Sometimes we make the same choice each time we revisit a decision,
but other times we make a different choice.

If you need to make a new decision, you can use a clean copy of this
workbook. There is a 3-page worksheet at the end of the workbook that
can be photocopied to use every time you need help making a decision.
TIP You can also use the TRIP MAP steps with pen and paper.
We often learn
something by looking
at how our past deci-
sions turned out—
good and bad.

If you did not like how

your decision turned TIP
out, at least you learned
what you do not like. Cut out a wallet card from the back cover to
You can use this informa- help you remember the TRIP MAP steps.
tion to help you make
different decisions in
the future.

14
 TRIP MAP

CONGR ATU L ATIONS!

You have completed the TRIP MAP steps.

You have:

• Thought about your decision

• Researched and identified your options
• Weighed the pluses and minuses of your options
• Selected the best option for you, and
• Made an action plan.

The next section of this workbook contains resources you can copy and use as often as
needed.

These are:

• Tips for Talking about the Decision

• Decision Making Worksheet
• Plus-Minus Chart
• Action Plan

15
Talking For Talking
about a Decision TIPS
About Your Decision
Conversation Starters

• Do you have time to talk?

I have some news I would
like to share with you. Often, you will need to tell others about the decision you made,
• I have been thinking particularly people who are affected by your decision.
about something for a
long time. I would like
to talk to you about it.

• You know I have been Here are a few tips that can help you prepare to announce your
struggling with a difficult decision to someone:
decision for some time.
I would like to tell you • Think about how people will react and address concerns you think they
what I decided. will have.

• Rehearse your announcement with a friend or someone else you trust.

• Pick a good time. Avoid talking about a big decision when you or others
are busy, tired, hungry, or angry.

• Remember that people sometimes need time to accept news, and their
initial reaction might change over time.
Talking
• Stress your priorities in positive terms. For example, “It’s really important
about a Decision to me that I have more privacy, so I have decided to look for my
own apartment.”
Dealing with Disagreement

• I know you hoped I would

decide [mention their
choice here]. Instead, I Others may not like your decision or agree with it. It can be especially
chose [insert your choice
stressful if your decision goes against what is important to your family or
here]. I would like to tell
you why.
community. You do not need to defend your decision, but it can be help-
ful to explain how you arrived at it. What is important is that you weighed
• Your support is important your options and made a thoughtful, informed choice that is best for you.
to me. I would like to
share with you a difficult
There is no one best way to tell someone about a decision you have
decision I just made. It is
important for me to tell made. The key to success is to use the same thoughtful process you
you about it, even if you used in making the decision.
disagree with me.

16
TRIP MAP Decision Making Worksheet
Think
Problems you want to address Pressures such as deadlines or people who
want you to do something

People who can help and who will be Priorities for what is important to YOU in
affected by the decision the decision

RESEARCH: What facts and information do you need? Where can you get it?

IDENTIFY YOUR OPTIONS by brainstorming. Include “make no change” as an option. Narrow

your brainstorm list to what is practical and doable. Circle your three or four best options
and then write them on the Plus-Minus Chart on the next page.
• Make no change/ do nothing
•
•
•
•
•

17

Plus-Minus Chart: Weigh Your Options

Pluses How Minuses How

(good things) Important? (bad things) Important?

Option 1
Do nothing/
Make no
change

Option 2

Option 3

Option 4

18
Action Plan To
Step What Who When Completed

1. ❒

2. ❒

3. ❒

4. ❒

5. ❒

Resources:

19
 Resources
The material in the workbook is derived from many sources. We especially wish to
acknowledge the inspiration provided by the Personal Decision Support Guides created
by Ottawa Health Research Institute and available at http://decisionaid.ohri.ca.

You can use the links below to learn more about decision making skills and different
ways to approach decisions. The views, policies, and opinions expressed on the featured
web sites are those of the organizations maintaining the web site and/or the web site
authors and do not necessarily reflect those of SAMHSA.

Robert Harris, Introduction to Decision Making

http://www.virtualsalt.com/crebook5.htm

eHow Careers & Work Editor, How to Make Decisions

http://www.ehow.com/how_3838_make-decisions.html

University of Florida, Making-Up Your Mind—Improving Your Decision Making Skills

http://edis.ifas.ufl.edu/HE691

WebMD, Making Wise Health Decisions

http://www.webmd.com/a-to-z-guides

20
Notes
 T Think about T Think about
problems, pressures, problems, pressures,
people, and priorities people, and priorities

R Research facts and R Research facts and

possible solutions possible solutions

I Identify options I Identify options

P Weigh the Pluses and P Weigh the Pluses and

M Minuses for each option M Minuses for each option

A Action planning A Action planning

P Ponder the results P Ponder the results

of the decision of the decision

Use a TRIP MAP for decision making Use a TRIP MAP for decision making

T Think about T Think about

problems, pressures, problems, pressures,
people, and priorities people, and priorities

R Research facts and R Research facts and

possible solutions possible solutions

I Identify options I Identify options

P Weigh the Pluses and P Weigh the Pluses and

M Minuses for each option M Minuses for each option

A Action planning A Action planning

P Ponder the results P Ponder the results

of the decision of the decision

Use a TRIP MAP for decision making Use a TRIP MAP for decision making

www.samhsa.gov • 1-877-SAMHSA-7 (1-877-726-4727)

SMA 10-1123
27108.0211.84840104 First printed 2010