CHE 400-500—“Chemical Literature” Reference

Writing a Scientific Manuscript

Highlights for Success
Thomas Spector
Division of Experimental Therapy, Burroughs Wellcome Co., Research Triangle Park, NC 27709
Many scientists are far more comfortable performing sci- 4, Original: Elevation of intracellular ATP was observed fol-
entific experiments than they are reporting their findings. lowing i. v. administration of compound Q. Succinct:
Although they could benefit from the excellent books avail- Intracellular ATP was elevated following i. v.
administration of compound Q.
able on scientific writing, they may not have time to read
these comprehensive articles. As a result, considerable Several words are giveaways for detecting convoluted
data either are not reported or are published in ways that sentences with weak subjects.
inadequately express their significance.
1. Excess prepositions: Note that three prepositions
This article was written to complement the extensive re- eliminated by changing the above Example 1 to the suc-
views. It presents techniques for optimally relaying the cinct form.
content and meaning of scientific studies and for avoiding 2. It and there used as false subjects; Examples:
common problems. It begins with simple strategies to con- (a) It is of concern to the authors . . .
struct succinct sentences that are easy to read and under- (b) There exists in the rat. . . .
stand. It then discusses key features of the standard journal
sections, tables, and figures and suggests strategies for their Subject-Verb Location and Agreement
effective construction. People are easily lost in the forest between the subject
and the verb. Keep your readers on track by placing the
Writing Style verb as close to the subject as possible. Go pen and Swan (i t
Succinct Sentences discuss how intervening words interrupt the reader's ex-
pectations. In addition, subjects and verbs must agree in
Well-constructed sentences are succinct. They are easy number (singular and plural forms). I refer the reader to
to read and understand. Succinct sentences unambigu- Dodd (2) for a discussion of this topic.
ously relay content and meaning. The five topics of this
section describe methods for writing succinct sentences. I Active I Passive Voice and First Person
recommend constructing the major part of manuscripts Although the active voice is more succinct than the pas-
with succinct sentences. Less succinct sentences may be sive voice (3), many scientists prefer the latter. They be-
used for emphasis or to break up a string of succinct sen- lieve that the passive voice is more objective and, therefore,
tences that have become monotonous. more suitable for scientific writing. I suggest using the
Tangible noun subjects active voice wherever appropriate. Using active voice in
Example 1 under “Tangible noun subjects” added to the
The following suggestion is probably the most important clarity of the sentence.
recommendation in this article. Use a tangible noun as Sentence 1 (below) is an appropriate use of the first per-
the subject of the sentence.1 The key to writing a suc- son active voice. Here, the authors are drawing the conclu-
cinct sentence is to select the proper subject for that sen- sion. However, overuse of "we" or "I" can seem obnoxiously
tence. Tangible noun subjects are meaningful subjects. egocentric. Sentences 2 & 3 are examples of active and pas-
They immediately direct the reader to the focus of the sen- sive voice, respectively.
tence. Whenever possible and appropriate, use a tangible
noun as the subject of the sentence. 1. We conclude that the mechanism must be concerted.
The following examples demonstrate the advantages of 2. Neutrophils generate superoxide radical.
3. Mice were treated with methotrexate.
switching the subject (italicized) to a tangible noun. Notice
the ease of reading and understanding the "succinct" sen- Dangling and Misplaced Modifiers
tences. In contrast, the subjects of the "original" sentences
cause the reader to search for the intended meaning. Make sure that modifiers actually modify what they are
intended to modify. Otherwise, they may distort the mean-
1. Original: In the rat, the metabolism of 1 x 80 is character- ing of a sentence. The following dangling participial
ized by the formation of three-polar compounds. phrases (italicized) lead the reader to wonder how the cen-
Succinct: Rats metabolize 1x 80 to three polar compounds. trifuge turned the dial and who was incubated or was lying
2. Original: Another issue that concerns the authors focuses on the intestine.
on the interpretation of the in vitro data.
Succinct: The authors are also concerned with the inter- 1. Original: Turning the dial to 60,000 rpm, the
pretation of the in vitro data. centrifuge started.
3. Original: The modification of the method of Smith (ref) Corrected: The centrifuge was started by turning the dial to
led to the generation of acceptable data. 60,000 rpm.
Succinct: Acceptable data were generated by modifying 2. Original: Having incubated for 30 min at 37, we placed
the method of Smith (ref). the vials on ice.
Corrected: The vials were placed on ice after they had in-
1
cubated for 30 min at 37.
A tangible noun represents something that is touchable or con- 3. Original: Lying on top of the intestine, you will perhaps
crete. The subject of a sentence does the action (active), is acted make out a small transparent thread.2
upon (passive], or is described or identified. Corrected: You may see a small transparent thread lying
2
Example from Day (3). on top of the intestine.

Volume 71 Number 1 January 1994 47

 The misplaced modifier and phrase (italicized) in these restrictive clause italicized in Sentence 1 is necessary to
sentences substantially alter the intended meaning. the meaning of the sentence; whereas, the nonrestrictive
clause underlined in Sentence 2 is not.
1. Original: The cells only secreted small amounts of peptide
X. 1. Only drugs that stop the virus from integrating into the
Corrected: The cells secreted only small amounts of peptide human genome prevent chronic infections.
X. 2. The mechanism, which may be concerted, is difficult to
2. Original; A large mass of literature has accumulated on prove.
cell walls ofstaphlococci.2
Corrected: A large body ofliterature on cell walls of IC50/ID50; EC50/ED50
staphlococci has accumulated.
The "C" OF IC50 and EC50 abbreviates the "concentration",
Wordiness and the "D" of ID50 and ED50 abbreviates the "dose" of
agents that inhibit (I) the effect by 50 percent or produce 50
Words that don't enhance content or meaning may bog percent of the maximum effect (E). Therefore, ensure that
down the reader. For example, the boldface words in the the correct units are connected with the correct terms, for
following sentence are either superfluous or redundant example, an ED50 reported as "μ.M" is meaningless.
and should be deleted.
1. Original: We plan additional studies in the future in In Vitro / In Vivo
order to confirm previous experiments where replicate The term "in vitro" refers to experiments performed in
determinations consistently showed the pool size to es- an artificial environment with tissues, cells, organs, en-
sentially increase. zymes, fluids, etc. removed from living organisms. In vivo
Improved: We plan studies to confirm experiments where experiments are performed within living organisms. Thus,
replicate determinations showed an increase in pool sizes. experiments with parasites and viruses in cultured cells
Better: We plan to confirm the experiments that repeatedly
showed an increase in pool sizes. are in vitro studies, or studies in culture, and differ from in
vivo studies of infected animals or plants.
The next sentence also becomes more readable as it is
shortened. It is converted to a succinct sentence by replac- Jargon
ing the false subject with a tangible noun and by using ac- Either carefully define or delete any laboratory terms
tive instead of passive voice. that are not well established in the literature. Some exam-
2. Original. It has been reported (ref) that hydroxyurea se- ples of jargon follow. A correction appears in parentheses
lectively decreases purine deoxynucleotide pools. after the jargon.
Improved: Hydroxyurea was reported (ref) to selectively
decrease purine deoxynudeotide pools. 1. Microsomal (endoplasmic reticulumi) enzymes metabolize
Better: Hydroxyurea selectively decreases purine Compound Z in mice.
deoxynudeotide pools (ref). 2. Reactions (reactants) were mixed in a glass vial.
3. Proteins were (protein concentration was) determined by
Empty phrases can often be reduced to simple words. For the Bradford assay (ref).
example, the phrase, in the vicinity of, means "near". A list
of "empty phrases" and "words to avoid" are reported by Auxiliary Verbs in Compound Sentences
Huth(4) and Day(3). Auxiliary verbs should not be omitted when subjects
change in compound sentences. The auxiliary verb "was" is
Verb Tense needed in the second part of the following sentence to pre-
Many authors struggle with the use of past and present vent the voice from switching from passive to active. Obvi-
verb tense. The rules, however, are simple. ously, radioactivity cannot count. This type of error is com-
monly found in methods sections.
1. Use the present tense to describe experiments and data
that have been established and exist in the literature, e. Original: Scintillation fluid was added and the radioactivity
g. Compound 6 is inefficiently degraded by guanosine counted.
hydrolase (ref). Corrected: Scintillation fluid was added and the radioactivity
2. Use the past tense to describe experiments and data of was counted.
your present manuscript, e. g. Compound 6 was ineffi-
ciently degraded by guanosine hydrolase. (See the table Significant Digits
on the next page.)
The number of significant digits in data should not exceed
Word and Number Selection the precision of the determination. Because errors denote the
magnitude of uncertainty, they should be presented with only
The following items frequently surface as problems in one significant digit. Furthermore, this digit determines the
scientific manuscripts. least significant digit of the reported value. Thus, the left-
most place of the error determines the right-most significant
Affect / Effect digit of the value. Accordingly, theism for Compound 1 in the
Stick to the most common and least troublesome use of table is 15 ± 1, and not 15.32 ± 1.27, and the Km of Compound 6
these words. Use affect as a verb meaning "to change or is 120 ± 10, and not 122 ± 11.
influence", and effect as a noun meaning "a result or conse-
quence". Editing
1. Excess acid will affect the yield. I recommend having several colleagues comment on the
content, construction, and style of your manuscript. Even
2. He studied the effect of excess add. accomplished writers benefit by critical reviews of their
That/Which manuscripts. Peer reviewers are easy to find. Some
People seem to be agreeing that that, which appears not-so-highly skilled writers may be clever reviewers.
without a comma, should be used to introduce restrictive Remember
clauses, and that which, which appears with a comma, sets 3
off nonrestrictive clauses. Strunk and White (5) advise to Day (3) and Dodd {2) condone the use o( split infinitives such as 'to
"go on a which hunt" to make articles more readable. The selectively decrease', but caution to preserve the intended meaning.

48 Journal of Chemical Education

to encourage your reviewers to be frank. Honesty may be Materials
more valuable than politeness.
The review process also allows you to distance yourself Most material acquisitions are straightforward. The fol-
lowing example demonstrates an economical style for
from your article. Writers often are too close to their writing. grouping and listing.
You may not adequately describe complex material for the
uninitiated, or you may not present a clear overall picture. Acetaminophen, chloramphenicol, zomepirac, and
Your colleagues' perspectives can be useful, but don't let too probenecid were purchased from Sigma Chemical Co. (St. Louis,
many cooks spoil the broth. Weigh all the opinions before MO); Coomassie Blue reagent was from Pierce Biochemicals
(Rock-ford, IL); HPLC grade ammonium phosphate
making changes. (monobasic), acetonitrile, and water were from Mallinckrodt
(St. Louis, MO).
Manuscript Sections
General comment. I suggest that you read your selected Methods
journal's instructions to authors before writing your manu- General methods belong in this section; whereas, specific
script. Each journal has different ways of including specific details of particular experiments belong in the result sec-
parts. Editors appreciate receiving properly formatted tion. Labels, as "Standard Assay" and "Buffer B", for gen-
manuscripts. eral procedures or items described here avoid repetition of
lengthy wording. The term "modified method" should be ac-
Title Page companied by a list of the modifications and the reasons
why they were made.
Although the details of the title page are specified in the
instructions for each journal, suggestions for title selection Results
may not be adequate. Titles should be short, revealing, and
enticing, but generally do not contain an active verb. Be- This is usually the most straightforward and easiest sec-
cause most people scan titles by looking at their beginning tion to write. Results should contain an objective and clear
and ending, the most important words should be located in description of the experimental findings presented in a log-
these places. A bold phrase or name (heading) ending with a ical sequence that unravels the story and aids the reader's
colon and followed with a descriptive phrase (subtitle) understanding. This sequence is not necessarily the chron-
provides initial recognition plus crucial information. For ological order in which the experiments were performed.
example, Human Sulfite Oxidase: Irreversible Inactivation Add a bit of explanation and this section is finished. An
by Futile Chloride, readily draws attention to key elements occasional conclusion may be appropriate here, but save
when it appears as: most interpretation for the discussion section.
Human Sulfite Oxidase:
Irreversible Inactivation by Futile Chloride Tables
The table in the left column is an example of a well-con-
structed table.
Summary/Abstract
• The title is simple and clear.
Present the important findings. Include values and • The column headings are accurate and contain the units.
methods that are crucial to their understanding and inter- • The uncluttered data are easy to read and understand with
pretation. Omit other details. The summary is easier to out reference to the text.
write after Results and Discussion are completed. • The data are sorted (after the reference compound) in de-
creasing value by the most important column (Vmax/Km).
Introduction • The absolute value of the reference compound is reported.
• The number of significant digits in the values do not exceed
This is the most important section for manuscript con- the precision of the determination.
struction. It provides background information that de-
scribes and justifies the need for or advantage of the scien- Figures
tific study. It then clearly defines the purpose or problem,
explains the approach taken, and may end with a brief The sample figure shown on the next page exemplifies
summary of the findings. Thus, a well-written introduction an easily understood figure.
structures the entire manuscript. Authors who write this • The purpose of the figure is readily discernible by visual
section first usually find that the rest of the manuscript inspection.
readily flows from it. • The title of the figure is clear, simple, and relevant.
• The legend contains adequate information to understand the
Substrate Specificity of Canine Guanosine Hytfrolase figure.
• The uncrowded figure contains adequate and balanced
Substrate Km± S.E. Vmax, ± S.E. Vmax / Km white-space.
(μM) (μ mo l/m in/unit) (relative) • The curves are labeled within the figure (if acceptable by the
journal) to avoid the need to Flip visually between the
Guanosine
a
30 ٛ 2 1.30 ٛ 0.07 100 graphic and the legend.
• The curves don't extend beyond the data points.
Compound 1 15ٛ 1 1.2 ٛ 0.1 190 • The symbols clearly distinguish the curves.
• The axes are labeled clearly and have meaningful values
Compound 2 5ٛ 1 0.17 + 0.03 78 with appropriate intervals.
Compound 3 6ٛ 1 0.19 + 0.02 73 • The text remained legible after photographic reduction.

Compound 4 66 ٛ 6 0.19 ٛ 0.01 6.6 Discussion

Compound 5 200 ٛ 20 0.029 ٛ 0.004 0.33 This section brings out the significance of your work and
Compound 6 120 ٛ 10 0.00097 ٛ 0.00006 0.019
relates it to the literature (and to your introduction). Al-
though a brief rehash of results maybe appropriate, this is
a
Reference substrate; specific activity was 450 mol/min/mg. not the place to present results. Discuss, interpret, and
comment on all significant findings and discrepancies of

Volume 71 Number 1 January 1994 49

 Readers tend to remember best what they read first and last.
So cover the most important items first, and don't try to
bury items of doubt by saving them for last. End your
discussion with a positive and optimistic conclusion con-
cerning the most favorable aspect of your study.
Mean Lesion Score

Literature Cited Section

Consult the particular journal's instructions to authors
for the reference format. Almost all are different. They also
locate citations to unpublished data in different sections.
Because this is an error-prone section, proofread and
verify the references; neither the reviewers nor the
technical editors have the time to do this for you. Some
libraries and technical information departments provide
this service.
Acknowledgement
I am grateful to the many authors (myself included)
whose literary errors inadvertently provided the basis of
Days Post Infection this article, and I thank the reviewers and editors who
helped prevent this article from contributing to that collec-
Synergistic antiviral therapy by drugs A and B. Mice (10 per group) tion. D. Porter, R. Miller, and J. Specter were especially
were infected on the dorsum with herpes simplex virus type 1 (HSV-1)
and were treated on days 1-5 with the indicated drugs. Drugs A and B
helpful reviewers of earlier drafts.
were dosed orally at 2 and 4 mg/kg, respectively. Standard deviations
were less than 20% of the means. Lesions were scored on a 0-5 scale Literature Cited
as described in Methods. l.Gopin.G. D., Sv.im, J. A.Amer Scientist 19S0, 7S. 550-558.
2. Dodd, J. 5., Ed. The ACS Style Guide: A Manual fnr Authors and Editors: The Amer.
Chem. Sot-1 Washington, DC. 1986.
3. Day, R. h.How to Write and Publish a Scienltfit: Paper, 3rd ed ; Oryy Press1 Xew York.
the manuscript. Discrepancies are better discussed here 1988.
than left as fodder for potential critics. 4. Hath, E. J How ta Write and Publish Papers in the Medical Science*, 2nd ed.; Hensvl.
W. H., Ed , Williams & Wilkms; Baltimore. 1990.
I recommend writing a preliminary outline of the points 5. Slmnk, W., Jr., White, E. B. The Elements of Style, 3rd ed.: .Mscmilliair New Yard.
to be discussed. This approach keeps the manuscript flow- 19TO.
ing in a logical way and prevents rambling.

50 Journal of Chemical Education