Loving Kindness in Buddhism

Download as pdf or txt
Download as pdf or txt
You are on page 1of 92
At a glance
Powered by AI
The key takeaways are that mettā or loving-kindness is essential for developing wholesomeness according to Buddhism. Developing mettā leads to less selfishness and is important for harmony in society.

Mettā is loving-kindness. The text explains that in order to develop mettā, one must understand what it is and when it arises. It also cannot be developed if taken for selfish affection. Quotes from Buddhist scriptures are used to illustrate how to practice mettā as taught by the Buddha.

Cittas are moments of consciousness that experience objects through the senses. Cetasikas are mental factors that accompany each citta. A citta can be wholesome, unwholesome or neutral depending on if it is accompanied by mettā, selfishness or anger.

●1

Introduction
By Nina van Gorkom

Ms. Sujin’s approach to the development of loving-kindness, mettå is very


direct. She aims at the practical application of the Buddha’s teachings in daily
life. The Buddha teaches the way to eradicate what is unwholesome and to
develop what is wholesome. Mettå is an essential way of wholesomeness.
However, it is difficult to develop it because we usually think of ourselves. The
development of mettå is most beneficial both to ourselves and others: it will
lead to less selfishness and it is of vital importance to harmony and peace in
society.
This book is a compilation of a series of lectures held in the Bovoranives
Temple in Bangkok. During her lectures questions were brought up and
therefore part of this book contains questions and answers. Khun Sujin
(“Khun” is the Thai equivalent of Ms. and of Mr.) explains that in order to
develop mettå we have to know exactly what it is and when it arises. We are
likely to take selfish affection for mettå and then mettå cannot be developed.
Khun Sujin quotes from the Buddhist scriptures, the “Tipiìaka”, and from
commentaries in order to illustrate the practice of mettå as taught by the
Buddha. She always stresses that the practice should conform to the teachings
of the Buddha as they have come to us at present. Formerly people were used
to accepting what their teachers said without going themselves to the source
of the teachings, the Tipiìaka. Khun Sujin has always greatly encouraged
people to read the scriptures themselves, to consider them and to prove the
truth to themselves through the practical application of the Dhamma, the
Buddha’s teachings, in daily life. When she started her lectures more than
twenty five years ago, there were hardly any Thai translations of the
commentaries to the Tipiìaka. Each time she needed the commentary to the
suttas she was going to quote during her next lecture, she asked one of the
monks for a translation from Påli into Thai of the corresponding parts of the
commentaries. It was also due to her encouragement that the interest in the
teachings and commentaries of both monks and lay people grew and more
commentaries were translated into Thai. At present the Tipiìaka has been
reprinted in Thailand in such a way that each sutta or each section is
immediately followed by the corresponding commentary which gives the
explanation of that text. Khun Sujin helps people not only to investigate the
sources of the teachings but also to have right understanding of the
application of the teachings, the practice in daily life. Her lectures can be
heard on the radio, morning and evening. The radio stations which send out
2 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

her lectures are in different parts of Thailand and their number increases. Her
lectures can also be heard in neighbouring countries, such as Laos, Malaysia
and Cambodia. With my deepest appreciation of Khun Sujin’s guidance and
support and with great pleasure I offer the translation of this book on Mettå to
the English speaking readers. I made a free translation adapted to “Western
people” with some changes, additions and footnotes. The Thais are familiar
with Påli terms and their meanings, but these are difficult to understand for
those who begin to study the Buddhist teachings. In order to help the reader
to understand this book I will now explain a few notions in this book which
are essential for understanding mettå and for its application in daily life.
Mettå cannot be developed if people do not know their own “mental states”,
in Påli: cittas. What we take for “my mind” are actually many different
moments of consciousness, cittas, which change all the time. There is only one
citta at a time which arises and then falls away immediately, to be succeeded
by the next citta. Our life is an unbroken series of cittas arising in succession.
Each citta experiences an object. Seeing is a citta which experiences colour
through the eye-sense. Hearing is a citta which experiences sound through the
ear-sense. Cittas experience objects through the six doorways of eyes, ears,
nose, tongue, body-sense and mind.
Cittas are variegated: some cittas are wholesome, kusala cittas, some are
unwholesome, akusala cittas, some are neither kusala nor akusala. When there
is mettå with the citta, the citta is kusala, but when there is selfish affection or
anger with the citta, the citta is akusala. There is one citta at a time, but each
citta is accompanied by several mental factors, cetasikas, which each perform
their own function while they accompany the citta. Some cetasikas, such as
feeling and remembrance, accompany each citta, while other types of
cetasikas can accompany only akusala cittas or only kusala cittas. Akusala
cittas are accompanied by unwholesome mental factors, such as attachment,
lobha, or aversion, dosa, and kusala cittas are accompanied by “beautiful
mental factors” such as generosity or mettå.
Cittas and cetasikas are realities which arise because of their appropriate
conditions. For example, wholesome qualities and defilements which arose in
the past can condition the arising of such qualities at present. Cittas arise and
then fall away, but since each citta is succeeded by the following one,
wholesome qualities and defilements can be accumulated from moment to
moment, and thus there are conditions for their arising at the present time.
Seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting and the experience of bodily impressions
are cittas which are neither kusala nor akusala, they are cittas which are
results of kamma, vipåkacittas. Unwholesome deeds and wholesome deeds
done in the past can bring about pleasant and unpleasant results at present.
Kamma is actually intention or volition. The unwholesome or wholesome
volition which motivates a deed is accumulated from moment to moment and
Introduction ● 3

thus it can produce result later on. Kamma produces result in the form of
rebirth-consciousness or, in the course of life, in the form of seeing, hearing
and the other sense-impressions. Seeing, hearing and the other sense
impressions experience pleasant and unpleasant objects, depending on the
kamma which produces these vipåkacittas. When a pleasant object is seen,
attachment is likely to arise after the seeing, and when an unpleasant object is
seen, aversion is likely to arise after the seeing. The sense impressions are
followed by akusala cittas more often than by kusala cittas. There is no self
who can direct or control the cittas which arise, they arise because of their
own conditions, they are non-self, anattå. Right understanding of the different
cittas which arise is the factor which can condition the development of more
wholesome qualities.
The Buddha taught that what we take for “our mind” and “our body” are
ever-changing phenomena which arise and then fall away immediately, they
are impermanent and anattå. Citta and cetasika, consciousness and mental
factors, are mental phenomena, in Påli: nåma. Physical phenomena are called
in Påli: rúpa. Nåma and rúpa are ultimate realities, or absolute realities.
Nåmas such as seeing, mettå or anger, and rúpas such as colour, sound or
hardness, are ultimate realities. They each have their own characteristic which
can be directly experienced when it appears. They are real for everybody.
Their names can be changed, but their characteristics cannot be changed.
There is ultimate truth and there is conventional truth. Without the study of
the Buddha’s teachings one knows only conventional truth: the world of
person, being, self, trees and cars. These are concepts we can think of, but
they are not ultimate realities which can be directly experienced. Conventional
truth is not denied in Buddhism, but the difference between ultimate truth
and conventional truth is pointed out so that they can be distinguished from
each other. Even when we have understood that what we take for a person
consists of nåma and rúpa which arise and fall away, we can still think of
persons. We can think of them in the unwholesome way: with selfish affection
or with anger, or in the wholesome way: with mettå or with compassion.
Buddhism teaches different ways of wholesomeness: dåna or generosity, síla
or good moral conduct and bhåvanå or mental development, which includes
the development of tranquillity, samatha, and the development of insight,
vipassanå. There are different types of kusala cittas, sometimes they are
accompanied by right understanding, paññå, and sometimes they are not
accompanied by right understanding. Dåna and síla can be performed also
without right understanding, but for mental development paññå is necessary.
There are different levels of paññå. When kusala citta with generosity arises it
can be accompanied by paññå which knows that generosity is kusala and
which knows that a wholesome action will produce a pleasant result. That is
one level of paññå. There is paññå at the level of intellectual understanding of
4 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

the Buddhist teachings, understanding that the nåmas and rúpas which arise
because of conditions are impermanent and anattå. Paññå in samatha,
tranquil meditation, is of a different level again. It is not merely theoretical
understanding, it realizes precisely when the citta is kusala and when it is
akusala; it sees the disadvantage of akusala and the benefit of kusala. Paññå in
samatha knows the right conditions to develop calm by means of a meditation
subject. Calm accompanies kusala citta and when its characteristic is known
through direct experience it can be developed. It is developed by
concentration on one of the meditation subjects, but if one just tries to
concentrate on one object without right understanding, calm cannot be
developed. There are particular meditation subjects of samatha, as explained
in the Path of Purity, (Visuddhimagga), which is an Encyclopedia on
Buddhism, written by the commentator Buddhaghosa. Mettå is among the
meditation subjects of samatha. When calm has been developed there can be
the attainment of jhåna, absorption. At the moment of jhåna there are no
sense impressions and one is free from defilements which are bound up with
them. The jhånacitta is of a higher plane of consciousness. However, after the
jhånacittas have fallen away defilements can arise again. Through samatha
defilements are temporarily subdued but they are not eradicated. It is
extremely difficult to attain jhåna and only very few people are able to do it.
Those who can attain jhåna with mettå as meditation subject, can with a mind
full of mettå pervade the whole world and all beings. This is the “extension of
mettå to all beings”, as referred to in this book. As Khun Sujin explains, also
those who do not intend to develop a high degree of calm can and should
develop mettå in daily life. If they know precisely when the citta is kusala and
when akusala and if they know the characteristic of mettå, they can develop it,
and at such moments there is calm with the citta.
The development of insight or vipassanå is different from the development
of samatha. Method and aim of these two ways of mental development are
different. The development of insight is the development of right
understanding of ultimate realities, of nåma and rúpa, in order to eradicate
the wrong view of self. Through insight all defilements and latent tendencies
of defilements can eventually be completely eradicated. In the development of
insight one does not try to concentrate on one object, but through mindfulness
or awareness, sati, right understanding of any reality which appears through
one of the six doors is developed. Right understanding of realities can be
developed at any place and any time, in daily life; one does not have to go to a
quiet place. Sati is a wholesome cetasika which is non-forgetful, aware of the
nåma or rúpa which appears at the present moment. At the very moment of
sati direct understanding of the reality which appears can be developed, so
that realities can eventually be seen as anattå. Satipaììhåna, the application of
mindfulness, is another term for the development of right understanding of
Introduction ● 5

nåma and rúpa. In the beginning sati and paññå are weak, but each moment
they arise they develop, even when this is not noticeable. They can develop
from moment to moment, from life to life.
The reader will come across the term sati-sampajañña, which stands for sati
and paññå. Sampajañña is another word for paññå. Sati and paññå are
different cetasikas which each perform their own function, but both of them
are needed in order to develop understanding of the reality appearing at the
present moment. If there is only awareness of realities without any
understanding, the goal, seeing realities as they are, cannot be reached. Sati-
sampajañña is anattå, it cannot be induced. There can only be sati-sampajañña
when there are the right conditions. These conditions are: listening to the
Dhamma as it is explained by someone with right understanding, and careful
consideration of the Dhamma. First there has to be theoretical understanding
of nåma and rúpa. One has to know that nåma is the reality which experiences
something, and that rúpa is the reality which does not know anything. One
has to understand that seeing is nåma which experiences what appears
through the eyes, visible object, and that visible object is rúpa. It is necessary
to understand that seeing is different from thinking of people which can arise
after seeing, to understand that different nåmas experience objects through six
doors. We may believe that we can touch our body, but in reality it consists of
different elements which appear one at a time. Through touch hardness or
heat can be experienced, not a body. The body is a concept which is made up
by thinking, not an ultimate reality. When one has understood what ultimate
realities are, different from conventional truth, there can be conditions for the
arising of sati, of mindfulness. Sati is directly aware and attentive to the nåma
or rúpa which presents itself right now. We experience time and again rúpas
through the body-sense, such as hardness or softness, but there is
forgetfulness and ignorance of these realities. We usually pay attention to a
thing or the body which is hard or soft, to the concept of a “whole”. When sati
arises it can be aware of a rúpa such as hardness or softness, or of a nåma
which experiences these rúpas, and at that moment these realities can be
investigated by paññå. They can be known as rúpa or nåma, which arise
because of their own conditions, and which are anattå. Paññå is developed in
different stages of insight. First the difference between nåma and rúpa has to
be realized, otherwise there cannot be the direct understanding of the arising
and falling away of nåma and rúpa, which is a higher stage of insight. It can
be understood in theory that nåma is different from rúpa, but when they
actually present themselves the difference between their characteristics is not
directly known. We tend to confuse realities such as hearing and sound or
seeing and visible object. Sati can only be aware of one reality at a time and
only if there is awareness over and over again paññå can develop so that nåma
and rúpa can be seen as they are.
6 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

When paññå has been fully developed there can be the attainment of
enlightenment: the experience of nibbåna, the unconditioned reality. Citta,
cetasika and rúpa are ultimate realities which arise because of conditions and
then fall away. Nibbåna is not rúpa, it is not a place where one can go to; it is
nåma. Nibbåna is the ultimate reality which is an unconditioned nåma, it does
not arise and fall away. Nibbåna is called the end of suffering, dukkha, the end
of the unsatisfactoriness inherent in all conditioned realities which arise and
fall away. There are four stages of enlightenment and at each stage
defilements are subsequently eradicated, until they are all eradicated at the
final stage, the stage of the arahat, the perfected one.
The objects of satipaììhåna, of the development of right understanding, are
ultimate realities, nåma and rúpa. Mettå is directed towards beings, it has
beings or persons as object. Beings are not ultimate realities, they are
conventional truth. However, it is most beneficial to develop both satipaììhåna
and mettå, as Khun Sujin explains. When there is awareness of nåma and rúpa
there can still be thinking of beings, thinking is a type of nåma which arises
because of conditions. We usually think of people with akusala cittas, cittas
with attachment or aversion. Instead of thinking with akusala cittas we can
learn to think with mettå-citta. Mettå-citta is a type of nåma and if there can
be awareness of it we will see it as a conditioned reality, non-self. If we do not
cling to a concept of “my mettå”, mettå will be purer. Khun Sujin emphasizes
that the development of satipaììhåna conditions the arising of mettå more
often. When satipaììhåna is developed defilements such as conceit, avarice
and jealousy, which are impediments to mettå, will eventually be eradicated.
The understanding that both we ourselves and other people are only citta,
cetasika and rúpa, will condition more mettå. If we understand that our
akusala cittas arise because of conditions, we will also understand that the
akusala cittas of someone else are conditioned. We will be less inclined to
judge others and we will have more understanding of their problems. We can
learn to become, as Khun Sujin says, “an understanding person”, someone
who sympathizes and helps others. If they do not respond to our kindness we
can still treat them as friends. True friendship does not depend on the attitude
of someone else, it arises with the mettå-citta.
Mettå is one of the “perfections”, excellent qualities the Buddha developed
during countless previous lives when he was a Bodhisatta, a being destined for
Buddhahood. People who have confidence in the Buddha’s teachings and
develop satipaììhåna can develop the perfections together with mindfulness of
nåma and rúpa. The perfections, and thus also mettå, are necessary conditions
for the attainment of enlightenment. The aim of the development of the
perfections is the elimination of defilements.
Khun Sujin helps people to know their own citta, to know when it is kusala
citta and when akusala citta. When they have right understanding of their
Introduction ● 7

cittas, they will not delude themselves and take for mettå what is akusala.
Khun Sujin’s explanation on mettå is essential for the understanding of what
mettå is, and of the way how it can be developed. Her explanations are very
convincing and direct and can be of great assistance to practise mettå in daily
life. The many texts she quotes from the Buddhist scriptures can be a reminder
and encouragement to practise mettå in daily life.
The quotations in this book are taken from the Tipiìaka and from some of
the commentaries, including the Atthasåliní (Expositor), the commentary to
the first book of the Abhidhamma (Dhammasangaùi), and the Path of
Purification (Visuddhimagga). The English translations of these texts are
available at the Påli Text Society, 73 Lime Walk, Headington, Oxford OX3
7AD, England.
I want to retain the Påli terms in this book, because it is useful to learn
some of them. The English equivalents are often unsatisfactory since these
stem from Western philosophy and therefore give an association of meaning
different from the meaning they have in the Buddhist teachings.
I wish to acknowledge my appreciation to the “Dhamma Study and
Propagation Foundation” and to the publisher Alan Weller who made the
printing of the translation of this book possible.
8 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism
●9

Chapter 1
Conditions and impediments

Mettå, loving-kindness, can be cultivated when we know its characteristic.


When there is true mettå other people are considered as friends: there is a
feeling of closeness and sympathy, we have tender care for them and we want
to do everything for their benefit and happiness. At such moments the citta is
gentle, there is no conceit, måna, which is the condition for asserting oneself,
for showing one’s own importance and for disparaging others.
If there is the earnest wish to develop mettå, we want to eliminate akusala
dhammas, also those which we usually do not notice. We do not realize the
extent of our conceit, jealousy, stinginess, aversion and other defilements.
When we develop mettå we will begin to notice many kinds of defilements,
and as mettå is accumulated more there will be less opportunity for the arising
of unwholesomeness.
Conceit is a defilement which is an impediment to mettå. When there is
mettå we think of the wellbeing of someone else, whereas when there is
conceit we find ourselves important. If we wish to eliminate conceit and to
develop mettå we must know the characteristic of conceit. We read in the
Atthasåliní (Expositor, Book II, Part II, Chapter 2, 372) about conceit:

“Conceit”, “overweening” and “conceitedness” signify mode and state.


“Loftiness” is in the sense of rising upwards or of springing over others.
“Haughtiness”, i.e. in whom conceit arises, him it lifts up, keeps upraised.
“Flaunting a flag” is in the sense of swelling above others. “Assumption” means
uplifting; conceit favours the mind all round. Of many flags the flag which rises
above others is called a banner. So conceit arising repeatedly in the sense of
excelling with reference to subsequent conceits is like a banner. That mind
which desires the banner is said to be desirous of the banner (i.e., self-
advertisement). Such a state is desire for self-advertisement. And that is of the
citta, not of a real self; hence “desire of the citta for self-advertisement”.
Indeed, the citta associated with conceit wants a banner, and its state is
reckoned as banner-conceit.

When we learn about the characteristic of conceit we can see the difference
between the moment of akusala citta and of mettå. Akusala citta does not
have the characteristic of gentleness and tenderness, at such a moment there
is no feeling of closeness and friendship for others. If we want to develop
10 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

mettå there must be “sati-sampajañña”, mindfulness and understanding, in


order to know when there is kusala citta and when there is akusala citta. At
the moment of conceit there cannot be mettå.
Jealousy is another defilement which is an impediment to mettå. When we
are jealous of someone we certainly do not treat him as a friend. If we really
want to develop mettå in our daily life, we should be aware of its
characteristic of sympathy and tenderness and we should realize that mettå
cannot go together with jealousy.
The Atthasåliní (Book II, Part II, Chapter 2, 373) states about envy:

In the exposition of envy, “envy at the gains, honour, reverence, affection,


salutation, worship accruing to others” is that envy which has the characteristic
of not enduring, or of grumbling at the prosperity of others, saying concerning
others’ gains, etc., “What is the use to these people of all this?”

The person who has attained the first stage of enlightenment, the sotåpanna,
has completely eradicated jealousy because he sees the characteristics of
realities as they are: mental phenomena (nåma dhammas) and physical
phenomena (rúpa dhammas), arising because of their appropriate conditions.
He realizes that there isn’t anybody who can create gains for himself, or who
can cause others to honour him, to greet him or to pay respect to him. In fact,
obtaining gains and receiving honour and respect from others depends on
conditions. Therefore, there should not be jealousy. When there is jealousy
there is no mettå. All dhammas, realities, are anattå (non-self), kusala
dhammas as well as akusala dhammas; they arise because of their appropriate
conditions. So long as one is not yet an “ariyan”, a person who has attained
enlightenment, there are conditions for jealousy. One is not only jealous of
those who are not one’s relatives or friends but even of those who are near
and dear to oneself.
Stinginess is another defilement which is an impediment to mettå. The
Atthasåliní (in the same section, 373) states that there is stinginess as to five
things:

dwelling (the place where one stays)


family (for a monk this can be the family of servitors to a monastery or
relatives)
gain (for a monk: the acquirement of the four requisites)
beauty and praise (one does not want others to be praised because of
beauty or merits)
dhamma (one does not want to share knowledge of dhamma)

We read further on (375, 376):


Conditions and impediments ● 11

“Stinginess” is the expression of meanness. “Avariciousness” is the act or mode


of being mean. The citta which is mean is the state of one endowed with
stinginess. “Let it be for me only and not for another!”— thus wishing not to
diffuse all one’s own acquisitions... The state of such a person is “avarice”, a
synonym for soft meanness. An ignoble person is churlish. His state is
“ignobleness”, a name for hard stinginess. Verily, a person endowed with it
hinders another from giving to others. And this also has been said (Kindred
Sayings, I, 120):
Malicious, miserly, ignoble, wrong...
Such men hinder the feeding of the poor...
A “niggardly” person seeing mendicants causes his mind to shrink as by
sourness. His state is “niggardliness”. Another way:—“niggardliness” is a
“spoon-feeding”. For when the pot is full to the brim, one takes food from it by
a spoon with the edge bent on all sides; it is not possible to get a spoonful; so is
the citta of a mean person bent in. When it is bent in, the body also is bent in,
recedes, is not diffused—thus stinginess is said to be niggardliness.
“Lack of generosity of citta” is the state of a mind which is shut and gripped,
so that it is not stretched out in the mode of making gifts, etc. in doing service
to others. But because the mean person wishes not to give to others what
belongs to himself, and only wishes to receive what belongs to others, therefore
this meanness should be understood to have the characteristic of hiding or
seizing one’s own property, occurring thus: “May it be for me and not for
another!”

The commentator investigates here the citta of the ordinary person who has
not yet eradicated avarice. Only the ariyan has eradicated avarice completely.
When aversion, conceit, jealousy or stinginess arise there is no mettå with the
citta. If we want to develop mettå we should acquire a refined knowledge of
our different cittas. The characteristics of the cittas which think of particular
persons should be investigated. Mettå should not be restricted to a particular
group of people. We should continue to develop mettå evermore. There can
never be enough mettå.
The Buddha showed in many different suttas the benefit of the development
of mettå. We read in the Kindred Sayings (I, Sagåthå vagga, Chapter X, The
Yakkhas, §4, Maùibhadda):

The Exalted One was once staying among the Magadhese, at the Maùimåla
temple, in the haunt of the yakkha Maùibhadda. Then that yakkha drew near
to the Exalted One, and before him uttered the verse:
To one of mind alert luck ever comes;
He prospers with increasing happiness
12 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

For him tomorrow is a better day.


And wholly from all hate is he released.

The Buddha said:

...For him whose mind ever by night and day


In harmlessness, in kindness takes delight,
Bearing his share in love for all that lives,
In him no hate is found toward anyone.

Thus we see the great benefit of the development of mettå.


Mettå can be developed as a subject of tranquil meditation, samatha. If
there is right understanding of the development of calm with this subject, a
high degree of calm, even absorption, jhåna, can be attained. The cittas which
attain absorption, jhånacittas, are of a higher plane of citta. At the moments of
jhånacitta there are no sense impressions and one is temporarily free from
defilements. However, after the jhånacittas have fallen away, defilements arise
again. The development of tranquillity with mettå as meditation subject will
not lead to the eradication of anger, dosa. Only the development of
satipaììhåna, right understanding of realities, leads to the eradication of
defilements. Defilements are eradicated subsequently at four stages of
enlightenment. Only at the fourth stage, the stage of the arahat, all
defilements are eradicated. At the third stage, the stage of the “non-returner”,
anågåmí, anger or aversion is eradicated. The anågåmí has no more anger and
is full of mettå.
The development of right understanding of realities, satipaììhåna, can be
the condition for more mettå. Paññå, right understanding, knows that what
one takes for beings, people or self are only mental phenomena, nåma
dhammas, and physical phenomena, rúpa dhammas. We use conventional
terms and names for the different beings and things which appear, but in
reality there are only nåmas and rúpas which arise because of conditions and
then fall away. Each citta which falls away is succeeded by the next one, and
also rúpas which fall away are replaced so long as there are conditions for
them to be produced.
Someone said that while he is not engaged in any activity he finds that he is
distracted, that he has akusala cittas. He wishes, in order to have kusala cittas,
to recite stanzas about mettå for a long time. If one develops satipaììhåna
however, one should remember that even feeling distracted or dull can be
object of awareness. In such circumstances sati can be aware immediately of
the characteristic which appears and then there are kusala cittas. It is not easy
to know the characteristic of the reality which appears; paññå should really be
developed so that there can be precise knowledge of the different
Conditions and impediments ● 13

characteristics of nåma and rúpa. There must be awareness of the


characteristic of the reality which experiences, nåma dhamma, and of the
characteristic of the reality which does not know anything, rúpa dhamma. The
difference between the characteristics of nåma and rúpa should be clearly
distinguished. When there is awareness of the realities which appear one at a
time through the doorways of the senses and the mind, through the six doors,
their characteristics must be carefully considered and investigated. In that way
nåma and rúpa can be understood as they are: as non-self.
The person who believes that he should just recite texts about mettå may
not be sure whether there are at such moments kusala cittas or akusala cittas.
He may not know that awareness, sati, is necessary for the development of
paññå, understanding, which clearly knows the reality appearing at the
present moment. Perhaps he may not even know to which purpose he recites
texts. If we really want to cultivate mettå we should see the disadvantage of
all kinds of akusala, such as aversion, conceit, jealousy and stinginess.
For the development of mettå it is necessary to have a refined, detailed
knowledge of one’s different cittas. They must be known as they really are.
Kusala citta and akusala citta have different characteristics. Even if there is
kusala of a slight degree, that moment is completely different from the
moments of attachment. If sati and paññå do not arise one cannot know when
there is lobha and when there is mettå. If one does not know their different
characteristics one may unknowingly develop akusala instead of mettå since
one takes for kusala what is in fact akusala. Therefore a precise knowledge of
the different characteristics of lobha and mettå is necessary. The Atthasåliní
(Book II, Part II, Chapter 2) explains about the many aspects of lobha
mentioned in the Dhammasangaùi. We read about “delight”:

“Delight” refers to this that by greed beings in any existence feel delight, or
greed itself is delighting in. In “passionate delight” we get the first term
combined with delight. Craving once arisen to an object is “delight”; arisen
repeatedly, it is “passionate delight”...

This is daily life which should really be investigated. When mettå does not
arise citta is infatuated by objects, it delights in objects all the time. If there is
no awareness we do not know when there is lobha. The clinging to the
different objects which are experienced will condition our behaviour, our
actions through body and speech, and then we can find out that there is no
mettå. When we have learnt through our own experience the characteristic of
lobha and of mettå when they arise, we can compare them and clearly know
their difference.
We should not only try to develop mettå when anger arises, but also when
there is attachment. We should consider with what kind of citta we think of
14 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

our friends, our circle of relatives, those who are near and dear to us. We
should find out whether there are at such moments cittas with mettå or cittas
with lobha, and we should learn by our own experience the difference
between these moments. If we earnestly wish to develop mettå we should not
waste any opportunity to learn about the characteristics of our different cittas
so that there are conditions for the development of mettå. It is useless to think
that we should develop mettå only when we become angry.
I will now go into some questions with regard to the development of mettå.

Question: the characteristic of lobha is love and attachment. If one says that
attachment to relatives and friends is lobha and that it is therefore wrong to
be attached to them I think that this does not agree with our ordinary, daily
life in the world.
Khun Sujin: If one wants to develop mettå there must be a precise
knowledge of one’s different cittas. If people only recite texts about mettå it is
not sufficient; the characteristic of mettå should be known precisely. When
there is mettå there is no anger. However, when we love someone and we are
attached to that person there is lobha, not mettå, and lobha can condition
anger. We should consider which reality is better, mettå or selfish love, which
is actually lobha. When we are in the company of family or friends, there can
be mettå and then we can come to know its characteristic. When there is
mettå we wish other people’s benefit, there is no clinging, no selfish love. True
mettå towards someone else cannot condition dislike of that person. Thus,
when we have mettå instead of lobha others will benefit from this too. Both
the person who has mettå and the person who is the object of mettå will
benefit. If there is only lobha in our daily life there are many conditions for
dislike and unpleasant feeling. However, to the extent mettå develops there
will be less opportunities for the arising of dosa. We will become more
considerate and think more often of the benefit of others.
Question: You said that sati and paññå (sati-sampajañña) are necessary for
the development of mettå and that one therefore should know the
characteristics of sati and paññå. If one does not know them mettå cannot be
developed, is that right?
Khun Sujin: There are two kinds of mental development, samatha, tranquil
meditation, and vipassanå, the development of insight or right understanding
of realities. For both kinds of mental development sati-sampajañña is
necessary. However, paññå in samatha is different from paññå in vipassanå.
Paññå in samatha knows the way to develop tranquillity, the temporary
freedom from defilements. Paññå in the development of vipassanå knows the
characteristics of mental phenomena and physical phenomena, of the realities
which appear one at a time through the six doors.
Question: Sometimes mettå can arise when one is concerned about other
Conditions and impediments ● 15

people who are in trouble. At such a moment there is sati but there may not
be paññå which knows the characteristic of sati. Is there true mettå at such a
moment?
Khun Sujin: When mettå arises the citta is kusala and it is accompanied by
sati which is a wholesome reality (sobhana dhamma). One may not have sati-
sampajañña so that a higher degree of calm can be developed, but when there
is mettå it has to be accompanied by sati, because of conditions. Sati which is
non-forgetful of kusala accompanies each kusala citta. Because of
accumulations of kusala there can be conditions for different kinds of kusala,
for dåna, generosity, for síla, abstention from unwholesome deeds or for
mettå. Those types of kusala are accompanied by sati but not necessarily by
paññå. However, if one wants to develop mettå as subject of calm and attain
to higher degrees of calm, sati-sampajañña is necessary. Through sati-
sampajañña the difference between the characteristics of mettå and lobha can
be known precisely.
Question: I will speak about events in my daily life. Sometimes when I drive
the car I recite: “May all beings be happy, may they not suffer any harm or
misfortune.” When I happened to be in a complicated traffic situation,
however, I could at first not be considerate to others. Later on I realized that I
did not behave in accordance with the texts about mettå I had recited. I
started to consider more those texts and I learnt to apply mettå in the traffic
situation. Thus this is the effect of thinking and considering.
Khun Sujin: When you are in a complicated traffic situation do you think of
the words, “May all beings be happy”?
Question: No, I do not think of these words at such moments.
Khun Sujin: The development of mettå is not a matter of thinking of words,
but one should know the reality of mettå-citta. Such a moment is different
from the moments of annoyance, anger or vengeance.
Question: If I had not recited texts about mettå I would not be considerate in
the traffic situation, I would only think of myself.
Khun Sujin: You should have a detailed knowledge of realities, you should
find out whether there is at the moment you recite true mettå or just thinking
of words. There is true mettå at the moment you are considerate towards
others, not when you just recite words.
Question: The reciting does have an effect. If I had not recited I would not
have asked myself whether I really wanted other beings to be happy. The fact
that I asked myself this was the effect of my recitation.
Khun Sujin: When you asked yourself this you realized already that mettå is
not just reciting words but that it should be practised.
Question: Yes, that is true. When I practised mettå in the situation I did not
recite.
Khun Sujin: Some people only think of reciting texts about mettå, but after
16 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

they have finished reciting they become angry when something unpleasant
occurs. One may recite words about mettå, but mettå may not arise when
there are beings or people present. One may recite for a long time, but when
something unpleasant happens, where is mettå? How much longer should one
then recite so that mettå can arise?
Another questioner: If one thinks that one must recite in order to develop
mettå there will not be any result, because one has wrong understanding
about the development of mettå. Its development will only be successful if one
practises mettå in the situation of one’s daily life. Since a year or two I have
the feeling that I have more mettå than before, and that is only due to Khun
Sujin’s lectures about Dhamma I listened to. I always think now of doing
things for the benefit and happiness of others, no matter whether it is a small
matter or something more important. I feel that when sati arises the citta is
gentle. When we abstain from killing mosquitos or help other beings who are
in trouble there is mettå. It happened that at first I did not want to make an
effort to help other beings, but later on I could do it, because I considered
their benefit and happiness. Sometimes people sell things I do not want to
buy, but I still buy them because mettå arises. I do not buy them because I
wish to have them or I need them. I think of Khun Sujin’s words, “It does not
matter whether we do a lot or just a little for someone else, but we can
consider his benefit and happiness.” Whenever I think of these words kusala
citta with mettå can arise.
Khun Sujin: Anumodhanå. This is the practice of the Dhamma, it really is
the development of mettå. The Påli term for development is “bhåvanå” and
this literally means: to make become more, to cause to arise often, time and
again. Development is not reciting texts with the expectation that as a result a
high degree of calm, even absorption, jhånacitta, will arise. There should be
mettå in our daily life. We may, when we are alone, recite texts about mettå
many times, but when we are in the situation of our daily life mettå may not
arise. The real development of mettå is done through the practice, through our
behaviour in the different circumstances of daily life, when we are in the
company of other people.
Question: I still think that the reciting of texts on mettå may be beneficial.
Reciting is not easy. I may think of people I do not like, such as Mr. X. who
had done me wrong in the past, but now, while I develop mettå, I think, “May
Mr. X. be happy, may he not suffer any misfortune”. When I recite texts, I do
not have to spend any money or make an effort to help someone. I am not
ready yet to do these things.
Khun Sujin: The reason is that you did not develop mettå gradually, in daily
life. Today you do not see Mr. X., but you see other people. Can you find out
whether there is mettå now, while you see other people? When one really
develops mettå one must know that when there is mettå the citta is free from
Conditions and impediments ● 17

all that is unwholesome. At such a moment there is no conceit, no idea of


making oneself important. Even when we look at other people or think of
them, we can do so without looking down on them, without conceit. Mettå
can be expressed through the body, even in our gestures, and in our way of
speech. No matter with whom we are, sati-sampajañña can arise and we can
find out whether the citta at a particular moment is accompanied by mettå or
not. We can develop mettå all the time and we should not select the persons
towards whom we will have mettå, such as Mr. X.
Question: I will start to develop mettå all the time. When I see other people I
will think, “May all people be happy, may they not suffer misfortune”.
Khun Sujin: Why do you think of all people?
Question: When I look at people I see them as a group.
Khun Sujin: At this moment you know in theory that there are only nåma
and rúpa, no beings, people or self. However, you do not know the
characteristics of nåma and rúpa. There is no sati-sampajañña which considers
each kind of reality which appears. When the characteristics of nåmas and
rúpas are clearly known, as they appear one at a time, mettå can be developed
more. Thus, there must be sati-sampajañña which knows the characteristic of
the citta when there is mettå for such or such person. Otherwise we could not
know whether there is only reciting and thinking of texts about mettå, or
sincere mettå for each person we meet.
Question: When I recite texts on mettå there is sometimes no paññå, but
there is sati. I wish to extend mettå to all beings.
Khun Sujin: We should know the meaning of “developing mettå” and of
“extending mettå to all beings.” If one has not really developed mettå the citta
does not wish happiness for anybody one meets. One does not yet have a
feeling of friendship for all people, and thus one is not able to extend mettå to
all beings. One can begin to develop mettå for other people through body,
speech and thoughts, and thus it can gradually increase. When we think of
someone else, whoever he may be, or whenever we meet someone else, there
can be sincere mettå through body, speech and mind. By the recitation of texts
on mettå there will not be any change in the expression of our face or in our
speech; mettå will not develop through the recitation of texts. When we meet
someone we can consider the citta at that moment, we should know whether
we look down on him, even though we do not show this outwardly, but it is
just in our mind. Does it happen that we dislike someone’s appearance,
behaviour or speech? Do we really consider that person as a friend while we
speak to him, do we sincerely seek what is beneficial for him and do we want
to help him? There is no rule that one should recite particular texts about
mettå. If we want to develop mettå we do not have to follow any rule about
recitation of texts. We can think of others with kusala citta which is
accompanied by mettå: we can think of doing things for his wellbeing and
18 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

happiness, of protecting him from misfortune and trouble. When one recites
one has to think of words, one has to think whether one should say first “may
all beings be happy”, or whether one should say first “may all beings be free
from suffering”. The reality of mettå is not the recitation of texts. Mettå arises
when we give help to someone else through actions or through speech,
depending on the situation at that moment.
● 19

Chapter 2
Overcoming anger

If we truly know the characteristic of mettå we can develop it. However, we


should not think that we can already extend mettå to all beings so that it is
boundless. In fact, only people who have developed samatha with mettå as
meditation subject and have attained the first stage of jhåna, are able to
extend mettå to all beings.

Question: The commentator states that one should recite particular texts
about mettå.
Khun Sujin: Does mettå-citta arise according to a particular rule?
Question: No, that is not so.
Khun Sujin: One should know the characteristic of mettå as it is and then
one can develop it more and more. However, as I explained, one should not
try to extend mettå to all beings straightaway in order to develop it more.
Question: There are forty meditation subjects of samatha and it depends on
one’s inclination which subject one will develop. Generally one has to recite
texts in order to develop meditation subjects, such as the “earth kasiùa”.
Khun Sujin: We should investigate the Tipiìaka in order to find out whether
it is said that we should recite texts. We read in the Kindred Sayings (I,
Sagåthå-vagga, Chapter VII, The Brahmin Suttas, 1, Arahats, §1, The
Dhanañjåni brahminee):

Thus have I heard:—The Exalted One was once staying near Råjagaha, in the
Bamboo Grove, at the Squirrels’ Feeding ground.
Now at that time a Dhanañjåni brahminee, the wife of a certain brahmin of
the Bhåradvåja family, was a fervent believer in the Buddha, the Dhamma and
the Sangha. And she, while serving the Bhåradvåja with his dinner, came before
him and uttered three times the following praise:
“Glory to that Exalted One, Arahat, Buddha supreme!
Glory to the Dhamma!
Glory to the Sangha!”
And when she had said so the Bhåradvåja brahmin exclaimed:
“There now! At any and every opportunity must the wretch be speaking the
praises of that shaveling friar! Now, wretch, will I give that teacher of yours a
piece of my mind!”
“O brahmin, I know of no one throughout the world of gods, Måras or
20 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

Brahmås, recluses or brahmins, no one human or divine, who could admonish


that Exalted One, Arahat, Buddha Supreme. Nevertheless, go, brahmin, and
then you will know. ”
Then the Bhåradvåja, vexed and displeased, went to find the Exalted One;
and coming into his presence, exchanged with him greetings and compliments,
friendly and courteous, and sat down at one side. So seated, he addressed the
Exalted One in a verse:—

What must we slay if we would live happily?


What must we slay if we would weep no more?
What is it above all other things of which
The slaying you would approve, Gotama?

The Buddha said:

Wrath must you slay, if you would live happily,


Wrath must you slay, if you would weep no more.
Of anger, brahmin, with its poisoned root
And fevered tip, murderously sweet,
That is the slaying by the ariyans praised;
That must you slay in truth, to weep no more.

When the Exalted One had thus spoken, the Bhåradvåja brahmin said to him:
“Most excellent, lord, most excellent”...

We then read that Bhåradvåja brahmin left the world under the Exalted One
and was ordained. Not long after his ordination he attained arahatship.
Question: The Buddha spoke more in general about slaying anger, but he
did not explain the way how to slay anger.
Khun Sujin: The Buddha taught the Dhamma in many different ways and in
all details so that people could see the disadvantage of akusala and the benefit
of kusala. He taught the development of paññå which can slay anger
completely.
Question: Anger can be slain. Through the development of vipassanå anger
can be slain and through the development of samatha it can be suppressed.
The development of samatha and the development of vipassanå are different,
they have different aims. I have read in the “Book of Analysis”, in the chapter
on Jhåna (Chapter XII), that if someone wants to purify the mind of the
hindrances he must sit and he must walk up and down. He must do this in
order to have right effort which is necessary for the suppressing of the
hindrances. Someone who develops vipassanå, however, does not have to sit
or walk up and down in order to have right effort. Whenever an object
Overcoming anger ● 21

appears right understanding can know its characteristic, and then there is
already right effort, which is energy for the development of understanding.
Thus the development of samatha and the development of vipassanå are
different. The person who develops samatha has to follow particular rules.
Khun Sujin: Where does he begin and how does he develop it?
Question: He starts with reciting words.
Khun Sujin: He should start with right understanding of the characteristic of
the meditation subject of samatha. This subject must condition the citta to be
calm, to be free from akusala. Sati sampajañña is needed to develop calm in
the right way with the meditation subject.
Question: The person who develops samatha in order to attain jhåna must
concentrate on the meditation subject so that calm and concentration can
increase.
Khun Sujin: That is too far-fetched, it is not related to the reality which can
be experienced now, by the person who is only a beginner. Can you notice the
characteristic of aversion in your daily life? The brahmin Bhåradvåja asked the
Buddha, “What must we slay if we would live happily?” The Buddha
answered, “Wrath must you slay if you would live happily, wrath must you
slay if you would weep no more”. When people are in daily life busy with their
work, are there no problems and unpleasant experiences in connection with
their work, with the people they meet in their work or with their colleagues?
During our work we are together with other people and then there can be the
arising of like and dislike, we may be distressed, annoyed, displeased or sad.
Whenever you feel displeasure there is dosa, and this has many shades and
degrees. We must slay dosa when it arises in the situation of our daily life, not
at some other time. When we can subdue dosa in daily life there is a degree of
calm or samatha. When we see the disadvantages of dosa we know that there
should be mettå instead of akusala. Mettå can arise at that moment if we
develop it right away and do not delay its development until later on. Thus,
when there are difficult situations or when problems arise in our work,
contrary to our expectations, when there are events which cause discomfort or
even distress, and we can then slay dosa, there will be happiness instead of
sorrow.
Question: Nobody likes aversion.
Khun Sujin: It is in daily life that dosa should be overcome. It can be
subdued by developing mettå as a meditation subject of calm, or by the
development of satipaììhåna. Sati of satipaììhåna is mindful of the
characteristics of realities which are appearing and thus paññå can be
developed stage by stage, until it is so keen that the third stage of
enlightenment, the stage of the anågåmí (non-returner) can be reached and
then dosa is really eradicated.
When Bhåradvåja had become a monk under the Buddha, his younger
22 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

brothers heard that he had gained confidence in the Buddha and had become
a monk. They became angry because of this and they gave expression to their
anger in their behaviour and speech. We read in the following sutta in the
Kindred Sayings (I, Chapter VII, the Brahmins, 1, Arahats, §2, Reviling):

The Exalted One was once staying near Råjagaha, in the Bamboo Grove, near
the Squirrels’ Feeding-ground.
Now “Reviler” of the Bhåradvåja brahmins heard that the Bhåradvåja had
left the world to enter the Sangha of Gotama the Recluse. Vexed and
displeased, he sought the presence of the Exalted One, and there reviled and
abused the Exalted One in rude and harsh speeches.
When he had thus spoken, the Exalted One said: “As to this, what do you
think, brahmin? Do you receive visits from friends and colleagues, from
relatives, by blood or marriage, from other guests?”
“Yes, Master Gotama, sometimes I do.”
“As to that, what do you think, brahmin? Do you prepare for them food both
dry and juicy, and an opportunity for rest?”
“Yes, Master Gotama, sometimes I do. ”
“But if they do not accept your hospitality, brahmin, whose do those things
become?”
“If they do not accept those things, Master Gotama, they are for us.”
“Even so here, brahmin. That wherewith you revile us who do not revile,
wherewith you scold us who do not scold, wherewith you abuse us who do not
abuse, but that we do not accept from you. It is only for you, brahmin, it is only
for you! He, brahmin, who reviles again at his reviler, who scolds back, who
abuses in return him who has abused, this, brahmin, is as if you and your
visitors dined together and made good. We neither dine together with you nor
make good. It is for you only, brahmin, it is only for you!”
“The king and his court believe that Gotama the recluse is an arahat. And
yet Master Gotama can indulge in wrath!”

The Exalted One said:

From where should wrath arise for him who, void of wrath,
Holds on the even tenor of his way,
Self-tamed, serene, by highest insight free?
Worse of the two is he who, when reviled,
Reviles again. Who does not, when reviled,
Revile again, a two-fold victory wins.
Both of the other and himself he seeks
The good; for he the other’s angry mood
Understands and has sati and calm.
He who of both is a physician, since
Overcoming anger ● 23

Himself he heals and the other too,


Those who do not know Dhamma think him a fool

When he had so said, Reviler of the Bhåradvåjas spoke thus: “Most excellent,
Master Gotama...”

We then read that he was ordained and not long after this became an arahat.
If we are in a similar situation, thus, when we are reviled, can mettå arise?
Or must we, when someone else is angry, treat him likewise? Can we change
our mood and forgive him instead of being angry in return? When there is
anger, no matter whose anger it is, there is no calm, there is the wish to cause
injury, to do harm. When we see the anger of someone else, his mood of
wanting to do harm, and we understand the disadvantage of it, do we want to
treat him likewise? When we see the disadvantage of dosa, there are
conditions for the arising of mettå. We should develop mettå so that we are
able to forgive someone else, even if he does wrong to us through body or
speech.
We read in the following sutta in the Kindred Sayings (I, Chapter VII,
Brahmin Suttas, 1, Arahats, §3, Asurinda):

Again, while the Exalted One was at Bamboo Grove, an Asurinda Bhåradvåja
brahmin also heard that the Bhåradvåja had entered the Sangha, and he, vexed
and displeased, also went and reviled and abused the Exalted One with rude
and harsh words.
When the he had thus spoken, the Exalted One remained silent.
Then said the Asurinda: “You are conquered, recluse, you are conquered!”
The Buddha said:

The fool does deem the victory his


In that he plays the bully with rude speech.
To him who knows what forbearance is,
This in itself makes him conqueror
Worse of the two is he who when reviled
Reviles again, repays in kind.

We then read that also Asurinda became a monk and attained arahatship.
The Buddha did not in any way retort angry words. We who still have
defilements may also keep silent when we are reviled, but with what kind of
cittas do we keep silent? We should consider our cittas at such moments.
There are different types of cittas for the Buddha when he keeps silent, and
also for the arahat, the perfected one who has attained the fourth stage of
enlightenment), for the anågåmí (who has attained the third stage), for the
24 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

sakadågåmí (who has attained the second stage), for the sotåpanna (who has
attained the first stage) and for the ordinary person; in each case there are
different types of cittas at such moments. It all depends on the degree of
wisdom. When someone has not yet eradicated dosa, he may keep silent and
not show anger outwardly, through gestures or speech, but can we know what
types of cittas he has? When satipaììhåna does not arise we do not know
whether we have at a particular moment kusala citta or akusala citta, we do
not know whether we have true mettå. When a person who still has
defilements notices that someone else keeps silent, he interprets this in
accordance with his own accumulations. However, the reason of someone
else’s silence may be different from what he thinks.
When we carefully consider the meaning of the sutta which was just quoted,
we will see its benefit. But this also depends on the extent we practise in
accordance with the Dhamma. When we speak coarse words, are we the
winner or the loser? Perhaps we think that we are the winner when we can
speak such words to the other person, but in fact, we are the loser. If we really
want to be the winner we should conquer our defilements. The person who is
not angry and does not retaliate upon an angry person has won a victory
which is hard to win.
When someone else is angry, we should not join him in his anger, we should
not be angry with him and speak harshly to him. If we repay him in kind, we
join him in his anger, we keep company with him, we keep company with
akusala dhamma. Mental development is difficult, it is conditioned by
listening to the teachings which explain the benefit of kusala dhammas. There
must also be energy and courage in order to develop kusala dhammas. The
development of all kinds of kusala is above all conditioned by satipaììhåna,
the development of right understanding of realities. Satipaììhåna conditions
the arising of sati, mindfulness, which is non-forgetful of kusala. There are
different levels of sati: there is sati with generosity, with síla (morality, the
abstaining from ill deeds), with the development of calm and with the
development of right understanding of realities. The development of
satipaììhåna can be the condition that the different levels of sati arise more
often. It conditions sati to consider the disadvantage of akusala which appears,
and to what extent its disadvantage is realized depends on the stage of the
development of paññå. When there is sati it is paññå which can see akusala
dhamma as it is. When paññå sees akusala as akusala there are conditions for
the arising of kusala instead of akusala.
Another brother of Bhåradvåja expressed his anger in a way different from
his brothers after he heard that the Bhåradvåja had entered the Sangha. We
read in the following sutta, “The Congey-man” (Kindred Sayings I, Chapter
VII, 1, §4):
Overcoming anger ● 25

Again, while the Exalted One was at the Bamboo Grove, the Bhåradvåja
brahmin, known as the Congey-man, also heard that the Bhåradvåja had
entered the Sangha. And he, vexed and displeased, sought the Exalted One’s
presence, and when there sat at one side in silence.
Then the Exalted One, discerning by his mind the thoughts of that man’s
mind, addressed him in verse:

Whoso does wrong to the man that’s innocent,


Him that is pure and from all errors free,
His wicked act returns upon that fool
Like fine dust that is thrown against the wind.

Listening to the Dhamma, even for a short time, is very beneficial. When the
Congey-man came to see the Buddha he was angry, although he did not scold
him or blame him. However, when he considered with respect the Dhamma he
heard, that is, when he considered cause and effect of realities, he gained
confidence in the Dhamma. He asked to be ordained under the Buddha. Not
long after that he attained the supreme goal of the higher life, he became one
of the arahats.
26 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism
● 27

Chapter 3
Practice in daily life

Mettå-citta can arise without reciting texts about mettå. We find an example
of this fact in the “Tuùèila Jåtaka” (III, no. 388). We read in the Commentary
to this Jåtaka that the Buddha told this story while he was at Jetavana. There
was a bhikkhu who had great fear of death. He was frightened when he heard
even a branch move, a stick falling or the call of a bird or another animal. The
monks assembled in the Hall of Truth and spoke about that monk who was so
frightened of death. They said, “now to beings in this world death is certain,
life uncertain, and should this not be wisely born in mind?” The Buddha asked
them what the subject of their conversation was and then said that bhikkhu
was afraid of death not only in this life, but also in a former life. We then read
in the Tuùèila Jåtaka that a long time ago in Varånasí the Bodhisatta was
conceived by a wild sow. In due time the sow gave birth to two male young.
One day she took them to a pit where they lay down. An old woman came
home from the cotton field with a basket of cotton, and was tapping the
ground with her stick. The sow heard the sound and in fear of death left her
young and ran away. The old woman took the two young pigs home in order
to look after them and she called the bigger one, who was the Bodhisatta,
Mahåtuùèila (big-snout) and the smaller one Cullatuùèila (little-snout). She
brought them up and treated them as her own children, but she loved
Mahåtuùèila more than Cullatuùèila. They grew up and became fat. One day
there were some young men who liked to eat pork meat, but they did not
know where to get it. They wanted to buy the pigs from the old woman, but
she said that she could not sell them since she loved them and considered
them as her children. The young men did not give up and offered more
money, but she did not want to sell them. Then they made her drink liquor
and when she was drunk they persuaded her again to sell her pigs. She then
agreed to sell only the small pig, not the big one. She took food and called
Cullatuùèila, the smaller pig. She had always called Mahåtuùèila first, and
thus Mahåtuùèila suspected that there was danger. Cullatuùèila saw that the
trough was full of food and he noticed that his mistress was standing nearby
and that there were also many men, with nooses in their hands. He became
very frightened and did not want to eat. He ran away to his brother, shaking
with fear. Mahåtuùèila comforted him and said that he should eat and that he
should not be sad. He explained that they were fattened for their flesh’s sake.
He said that all beings who are born in this world must die, that nobody could
28 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

escape death. Every being, no matter whether his flesh is eatable or not
eatable, must die. He said that their mother was their refuge before, but that
they now had no refuge anymore. They should not have any fear and plunge
in the crystal pool, to wash the stains of sweat away, they would find new
ointment whose fragrance never can decay. We read that Mahåtuùèila
considered the ten perfections and set the perfection of mettå before him as
his guide. The people who heard him preach were impressed that Mahåtuùèila
comforted his brother and then mettå and compassion arose within them. The
drunkenness left the old woman and the young men and they threw away
their nooses as they stood listening to the Dhamma.
These men did not have to recite first so that mettå could arise, mettå arose
because of its own conditions.
We read that Cullatuùèila asked his brother,

But what is that fair crystal pool,


And what the stains of sweat, I pray?
And what the ointment wonderful,
Whose fragrance never can decay?

Mahåtuùèila answered,

Dhamma is the fair crystal pool,


Akusala is the stain of sweat, they say:
Virtue’s the ointment wonderful,
Whose fragrance never will decay.

Kusala dhammas are like the fair crystal pool because they can purify one
from akusala which is like the stain of sweat. Síla is like the ointment whose
fragrance never can decay because when there is síla one does not harm
anybody or do anything which is disagreeable to others.
We read that Mahåtuùèila said that those who are fools delight in akusala,
whereas those who are heedful do not take to what is unwholesome. He
exhorted beings not to be sad when they had to die.
When the Buddha had told the story of the former life of that bhikkhu, he
said that Mahåtuùèila was he himself in one of his former lives as Bodhisatta
and that Cullatuùèila was the bhikkhu who was afraid of death.
Thus we see that mettå can arise without reciting texts. Thinking of the
words which are recited arises because of conditions. People believe that they
should recite because they are used to reciting all the time. When they have
such an idea it is a condition to think of the words they often recite. However,
if someone develops mettå there is sati-sampajañña which considers the
characteristic of mettå, and this is the opposite of akusala dhamma. When we
Practice in daily life ● 29

develop mettå-citta time and again there can gradually be more mettå.
Thus, we should consider and study with awareness the characteristic of
mettå as it is explained by the Buddha in many different ways. We should
remember that mettå will be more powerful if it is truly developed whenever
there is an opportunity for its application. Mettå can become stronger and it
can arise more often if we understand the benefit of mettå. Its arising is not
conditioned by the reciting of texts for a long time.
Question: I remember that when I was a child my father made me recite
texts. I could recite many texts but I did not understand their meaning. It is
the same in the case of reciting texts about mettå. The monks are chanting
texts each day, in the morning and in the afternoon, and now I wonder what
the use is of reciting.
Khun Sujin: They may recite that the five khandhas are impermanent or
anattå. However, the aim of reciting these words is to be reminded to consider
the characteristics of the five khandhas which are appearing now and to know
them as impermanent.
Question: That is true, reciting can be a reminder. When I recite, “May Mr.
X. be happy”, I do that in order that there can be mettå for Mr. X. later on.
Khun Sujin: We read in the Visuddhimagga (Chapter IX, 1, 2) about the
development of mettå from the beginning:

To start with, he should review and try to understand the danger in hate and
the advantage in patience. Why? Because hate has to be abandoned and
patience attained in the development of this meditation subject and because
he cannot abandon unseen dangers and attain unknown advantages.

It is not said that people should recite texts but they should know the right
cause which brings the appropriate result. The “Path of Purification”
(Visuddhimagga IX, 4) shows the danger of hate and the benefit of patience. If
one really understands this there are, when dosa has arisen, conditions for
sati-sampajañña to be aware of it immediately and to see the danger of dosa
at that moment. The Visuddhimagga explains that people who begin with the
development of mettå as a meditation subject of calm are advised not to
develop it towards four kinds of people: a person they dislike, a dearly loved
friend, a neutral person and a hostile person. Moreover, mettå should not be
developed towards the opposite sex and it cannot be developed towards a
dead person. It is difficult to develop mettå to the kinds of people who were
just mentioned. In the beginning one is not yet ready to do that; defilements
such as anger or attachment are likely to arise on account of those kinds of
people. Mettå cannot be developed towards a dead person, because he is no
longer the person he was before. The dying-consciousness of this life is
succeeded immediately by the rebirth-consciousness of the next life and then
30 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

there is a different being.


The Visuddhimagga explains that in order to make mettå grow it should
first be developed towards a person one respects, someone who observes síla,
who has wisdom and other good qualities, such as one’s teacher one loves and
respects. The reason for this is that in the beginning mettå is not yet
developed to such degree that it could be extended towards whomever one
meets. In order to be able to do this it must be developed time and again,
evermore.
Question: What is the proximate cause for the arising of mettå?
Khun Sujin: Seeing the danger of dosa, aversion or hate.
Question: Can there be mettå for what is not alive?
Khun Sujin: That is impossible. Mettå, karuùå (compassion), muditå
(sympathetic joy) and upekkhå (equanimity), which are the “four divine
abidings” (brahma-vihåras), must have as object beings or people. Thus there
cannot be mettå for what is not a living being. However, as regards dosa,
aversion, there can be aversion not only towards beings, but also towards
things or circumstances.
Question: Can mettå arise just after seeing visible object?
Khun Sujin: Mettå has beings as object. When you see a small child can
there not be mettå? How will you act when there is mettå? You may speak in a
kind way, you may help the child to cross the street or you may give it a
sweet. This is the way to develop mettå. We can realize ourselves to what
extent mettå is already developed. We cannot expect mettå to arise if we do
not know its characteristic.
Question: What is the difference between mettå which arises just after
seeing and mettå which arises while we are thinking?
Khun Sujin: When you see beings and people and you are annoyed you can
be aware of this. After seeing there may be akusala or there may be mettå.
When there is mettå you consider the other person as a friend, you wish for
his happiness and want to do everything which is beneficial for him. You feel
happy and cheerful while you think of his wellbeing, you may smile and you
will not behave in any way which will make him unhappy. Also when you give
him something you can do that in such a way that it truly makes him happy.
There are many ways of giving things to others. Some people give in such a
way that the other person feels no joy when he receives something. When
mettå has already become more developed, when it has become stronger, it
conditions our actions and speech and also our way of thinking about other
people. Even when we do not see other people we can think of them with
kindness. We can think of promoting their wellbeing and happiness, we can
consider ways to help particular persons, to support them in different ways.
Then there is mettå without the need to recite texts.
Reciting texts on mettå is actually not so difficult, but truly developing
Practice in daily life ● 31

mettå is difficult. This cannot be accomplished by reciting texts. As I said


before, there must be sati-sampajañña in daily life which knows precisely the
characteristic of mettå. It must know precisely when there is kusala citta and
when akusala citta.
Question: I think that one should recite in the beginning.
Khun Sujin: You said the same about the development of satipaììhåna, you
said that one should think before there can be awareness. You know that
seeing is the reality which experiences, the element which experiences, and
that the object which appears, visible object, is only a physical reality which
can be experienced through the eyes. Sometimes you believe that you need to
repeat to yourself that seeing is the reality, the element, which experiences
through the eyes, and that the object which appears is a physical reality, rúpa-
dhamma, which is experienced through the eyes. When there is hearing of a
sound you believe that you should repeat this to yourself first, because you
think that the reciting of words is very useful. What you should understand
correctly first of all is that each reality arises because of its appropriate
conditions. There are also conditions for thinking to arise more often than
sammå-sati, right awareness. When sammå-sati arises it can be directly aware
of the realities which appear; it can consider them in the right way, so that
they can be understood as non-self.
As to the term sammå-sati, sammå can be translated as right, and sati is
awareness or mindfulness. Sammå-sati is aware in the right way, considers
realities in the right way. How is it aware in the right way? When there is
seeing there can be right mindfulness of the characteristic of the rúpa-
dhamma which appears through the eyes, which is different from nåma-
dhamma. There can be right mindfulness of nåma-dhamma, the reality which
experiences, the element which experiences, which is seeing. Then there is
sammå-sati which is mindful in the right way, which is directly aware of the
characteristic of the reality which appears. If people believe that they should
recite, they will continue to do that, instead of being directly aware of the
characteristic of nåma or of the characteristic of rúpa. If one sees realities as
they are, as non-self, anattå, one will know that thinking about reciting,
thinking about words one repeats to oneself, is only a reality which arises
because of its own conditions. At such a moment sammå-sati cannot yet be
directly aware of the characteristics of nåma-dhammas and rúpa-dhammas,
and thus there is not yet precise knowledge of them. There is only thinking
about the characteristics of realities which appear, thus, there is only
theoretical understanding of them. If paññå realizes this there can be the
development of sammå-sati, instead of thinking of reciting or naming realities
“nåma” and “rúpa”, of repeating this to oneself. Sammå-sati is directly aware
of realities and considers in the right way the characteristics of nåma and
rúpa.
32 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

There is no rule at all in the development of satipaììhåna. When someone


thinks about the names of realities or thinks that he should recite words in
order to remind himself, he should remember that thinking in this way arises
because of conditions. He cannot force himself not to think in this way.
However, thinking is not sammå-sati of the eightfold Path. When sammå-sati
of the eightfold Path arises, it is aware in the right way of the characteristics of
nåma and rúpa and at that moment sammå-diììhi, right understanding, can
investigate the true nature of nåma and rúpa. Thus paññå can grow and it can
realize nåma and rúpa as they are: not a being, not a person, not self.
In daily life we see beings, we see people who belong to different families,
who are different as to the colour of their skin, who have a different rank or
position in society, who speak different languages, and who behave in
different ways. When we think of people who are so different in many ways
and we have right understanding of the characteristic of mettå, sati-
sampajañña can arise and be aware of the characteristic of the citta which
thinks. Then it can be known what type of citta is thinking, mettå-citta or
akusala citta. When akusala citta thinks of people, it can be realized as such.
For instance the akusala citta which is rooted in attachment, lobha-múla-citta,
may be accompanied by conceit or it may be without conceit. Sometimes we
think of others with conceit, and sometimes we think only with attachment
but without conceit. Or there may be akusala citta which is rooted in aversion,
dosa-múla-citta. We may think of others with aversion or even anger. Dosa-
múla-citta may at times be accompanied by avarice or by jealousy. Thus we
see that there are different types of akusala cittas which may think of other
people. The understanding of our different cittas can arise again and again so
that it grows and this is a condition for the arising of mettå when we see
people or when we think of people in daily life. In that way mettå can develop
more and more, and there can eventually be mettå for all beings. If people
want to develop mettå as a meditation subject which can condition calm, they
cannot do this without precise knowledge of the different cittas which arise.
There must be right understanding which knows exactly the characteristic of
calm which accompanies mettå when it appears at a particular moment in
daily life. When there is calm there are at such moments no defilements.
Question: Reciting, repeating words aloud is useful. When there is seeing, I
say to myself that this is colour, the reality which appears through eyes, or
that is the nåma which sees.
Khun Sujin: I do not say that it is not useful, but it is not sammå-sati of the
eightfold Path, and moreover, there is no rule that one should recite words.
Some people believe that there is a rule that they should recite words and they
cling to this idea. There is attachment instead of sammå-sati which considers
in the right way the characteristics of nåma and rúpa. When people think that
the reciting of words is useful, they continue to do this again and again. They
Practice in daily life ● 33

should not forget, however, that reciting, the repeating of words, arises
because of its appropriate conditions and that it is not yet sammå-sati. People
should find out for themselves what is more useful, reciting or sammå-sati of
the eightfold Path which considers in the right way the characteristics of nåma
and rúpa at the moments one does not recite.
Question: Sammå-sati is certainly better, but my paññå is not yet developed
to that degree.
Khun Sujin: This shows that there are conditions for thinking about realities.
However, at such a moment paññå should also know that there is not yet
sammå-sati of the eightfold Path. When there are at a particular moment
conditions for sammå-sati which is directly aware of nåma and rúpa, you can
find out that the right understanding which can develop at that very moment
is not the same as the reciting of words.
Question: If I recite words over and over, for a long time, sati can arise often
and then I can investigate realities with understanding.
Khun Sujin: This is understanding of the level of thinking, it is intellectual
understanding. There is not yet direct awareness of the characteristics of nåma
and rúpa. You spend a lot of time reciting, repeating words, but it would be
better if there could be sammå-sati which begins to be aware in the right way
of the characteristics of some nåmas and rúpas, little by little. Even though
there is not yet precise knowledge of the characteristics of nåma and rúpa and
there is not yet clear understanding of their true nature, you can begin to be
mindful of their characteristics. Thus it can gradually become one’s inclination
to be mindful of the realities which appear. The arising of sammå-sati depends
on conditions, but when it arises there is direct awareness of nåma and rúpa
and this is more useful than the reciting of words.
Question: That is right. If there can be awareness and direct understanding
of the reality which appears as rúpa or as nåma, paññå has developed already
to a certain level. However, when someone is a beginner in the practice,
paññå has not reached that level yet.
Khun Sujin: Those who are beginners have different accumulations. If
people have right understanding of the characteristic of sammå-sati, it can
arise. One may not yet be accomplished in the development of paññå, but one
knows the characteristic of sammå-sati, the reality which is mindful and
directly aware of the nåma which sees or hears or the rúpa which appears
through one of the senses or the mind. When there is right awareness the
characteristic of the reality which appears can be studied and investigated. It
is true that we cannot prevent thinking from arising, but we should not cling
to it and believe that it is a rule that we should think of words for a long time
and repeat them to ourselves in order that sammå-sati can arise afterwards.
34 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism
● 35

Chapter 4
Characteristics of mettå

The development of satipaììhåna is not repeating words to oneself, or naming


realities “nåma” and “rúpa”, without investigating the characteristics of the
realities which appear. This becomes clearer when we read the “Velåma sutta”
(Gradual Sayings, Book of the Nines, Chapter II, §10). We read that the
Buddha, while he was near Såvatthí, at the Jeta Grove, spoke to
Anåthapiùèika about the gifts given by him in a former life, when he was the
brahmin Velåma. He compared the value of different good deeds:

...though with a heart full of confidence he took refuge in the Buddha, the
Dhamma and the Sangha, greater would have been the fruit thereof, had he
with confidence undertaken to keep the precepts: abstention from taking life,
from taking what is not given, from carnal lusts, from lying and from
intoxicating liquor, the cause of sloth.
...though with confidence he undertook to keep these precepts, greater
would have been the fruit thereof, had he developed a mere passing fragrance
of mettå.
...though he developed just the fragrance of mettå, greater would have been
the fruit thereof, had he developed, just for a finger-snap, anicca-saññå, the
perception of impermanence.

Thus we see that the development of satipaììhåna is of the greatest value,


since through satipaììhåna the characteristics of realities are seen as they are.
Mettå is one of the four brahma-vihåras, divine abidings. The development
of mettå is intricate and one should learn about it in detail. The Buddha
explained that mettå should be developed time and again so that it can grow.
When mettå has been developed, it can also support the development of the
other brahma-vihåras of compassion, sympathetic joy and equanimity. When
someone has developed mettå, he can have compassion: he will not hurt other
beings. He can have sympathetic joy: he will rejoice in other people’s
happiness. Whereas if one does not develop mettå one is likely to hurt other
beings and one will not rejoice in their happiness. The Buddha stressed that
the development of mettå is very beneficial, since mettå conditions the arising
of other kusala dhammas. Therefore it is important to consider the
development of mettå more in detail.
If someone thinks that he can develop mettå by the recitation of texts about
36 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

mettå, he should try to find out whether this is the right approach.
Question: It is written that one should recite: “May all beings be free from
misfortune, may they be free from sorrow and unhappiness, may they live in
happiness. ”
Khun Sujin: You wish this for all beings, don’t you?
Question: That is right. This is actually the extension of mettå. I have learnt
the Påli text, but since I do not know the meaning I use the Thai translation
for my recitation. In this way I can understand the words I recite.
I think that while I am reciting there is sati. Sometimes it happens that I am
reciting and then, without realizing it, I do not go on with the reciting. I am at
times distracted and I think of other things. But at other moments I realize
that I am reciting and that I should not think of other things. When I notice
that I stop reciting is there then sati? When there is sati I can start again from
the beginning with the recitation of the text.
Khun Sujin: You extend mettå to all beings, but have you attained jhåna
already? If that is not so how can you extend mettå to all beings? When there
is mettå the citta is calm. When you think of a person you dislike, a person you
love or a neutral person and there is no calm at such moments, how can you
extend mettå to all beings? As the Visuddhimagga explains, in the beginning it
is difficult to have mettå for a person one dislikes, a person one loves or a
neutral person. When you recite that you wish happiness for all beings can
you truly extend mettå to all beings? You can only have boundless mettå,
including all beings, no matter where they are, if you have attained jhåna.
People should not believe that they, when they begin to develop mettå, can
truly, wholeheartedly, wish happiness to all beings. When they really know
themselves, they can find out that they do not mean this. When they think of
someone they dislike mettå does not arise. Are they then sincere when they
recite that they wish happiness for all beings? As we have seen, the attainment
of jhåna is necessary in order to be able to extend mettå to all beings.
When we think of a person we like, attachment is likely to arise and this is
not mettå. When we think of someone we hate or of someone who is a hostile
person there is no calm and we are simply not sincere when we recite for
ourselves the text of the mettå sutta: “May all beings be happy”. If someone
wants to develop calm, he should remember that calm is a wholesome quality
arising with kusala citta. When kusala citta arises there are no defilements and
then there is calm. If the characteristic of calm is known, it can grow, stage by
stage. Mettå is a meditation subject of samatha which can condition the
growth of calm, and it can also condition moments of calm in daily life.
However, in order to develop mettå in the right way, it is not sufficient to
think of mettå, but we should know first of all the characteristic of mettå. It is
actually the same as in the case of the development of satipaììhåna. We
cannot develop it if we do not know the characteristic of sati, mindfulness. We
Characteristics of mettå ● 37

may take thinking for mindfulness but thinking is different from mindfulness.
Sati of satipaììhåna is not forgetful, it is directly aware of the reality which
appears at the present moment and it considers the characteristic of that
reality. For the development of mettå mindfulness is necessary. If there is
mindfulness of mettå when it appears, its characteristic can be known through
direct experience.
We read in the Atthasåliní (II, Book II, Part II, The Summary, II, 362) about
adosa, non-aversion. The Atthasåliní which is a commentary to the
Dhammasangaùi, the first book of the Abhidhamma, explains in this context
the terms used in the Dhammasangaùi to define the reality of adosa:

“...having love” is exercising love, “loving” is the method of exercising love;


lovingness is the nature of citta which is endowed with love, is productive of
love. Tender care is watchfulness, the meaning is that one protects. Tenderly
caring is the method of such care. Tender carefulness is the state of tenderly
caring. Beneficence is seeking to do good. “Compassion” is the exercising of
compassion...

Before mettå can be developed we should first of all become familiar with the
characteristic of mettå. We should carefully consider the nature of our citta at
this moment: is it really accompanied by mettå or not? In this way we can
begin to develop mettå very gradually, by showing kindness to someone else,
and then mettå can increase.
We should consider the words of the “Atthasåliní” about friendship and the
attitude of intimacy, of closeness. When we are sitting together with others, do
we have a kind disposition towards them, do we have sincere friendship? If
that is the case, we can learn what the characteristic of mettå is.
No matter whether we meet people in a room, or outside, on the street or in
the bus, do we consider everybody we meet as a friend? If that is not so we
should not recite the words about extending mettå to all beings, that will not
be of any use. If we see someone now, at this moment, and we feel misgivings
about him, we should not try to extend mettå to all beings. Only those who
have attained jhåna are able to do this. When the meditation subject of mettå
brahma-vihåra has been developed mettå can become boundless. However, we
should begin with simply applying sincere mettå in daily life.
Question: My aim is not jhåna-citta, I do not expect to attain jhåna.
Khun Sujin: Therefore mettå cannot yet be extended to all beings.
Question: I recite the words about extending mettå to all beings with the
aim to have kusala citta.
Khun Sujin: But when you see a hostile person or when you think of him
annoyance is likely to arise.
Question: Yes, that is possible.
38 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

Khun Sujin: Therefore you should not try to extend mettå to all beings,
because you don’t mean it.
Question: I think that it is useful because while I am reciting the citta is
kusala.
Khun Sujin: This is not possible if you do not start in the right way, that is,
knowing the true characteristic of mettå.
Question: It is stated in the Visuddhimagga that one should begin with
extending mettå towards oneself.
Khun Sujin: In the beginning people are not yet ready to extend mettå to
others and therefore they can take themselves as an example. They can
remind themselves that they should treat others in the same way as they
would like to be treated themselves. That is the meaning of extending mettå
towards oneself.
Question: Thus the aim is to sympathize?
Khun Sujin: To sympathize with other people.
Question: Thus we have to extend mettå towards ourselves, towards a
disagreeable person, towards a loved person and towards a neutral person.
Khun Sujin: If you cannot yet have mettå for a disagreeable person, you
cannot extend mettå at all. If you try to extend mettå towards a dearly loved
person, attachment is likely to arise and attachment has a characteristic which
is different from the characteristic of mettå. Thus in that case you are not
successful either. Towards whom should we first extend mettå?
Question: I think towards oneself.
Khun Sujin: This is said only by way of reminder as we have seen. Those
who are beginners and not yet accomplished should think of someone else
who excels in síla, who has many good qualities which inspire love and
respect. It can be one’s teacher or someone who is the equivalent of one’s
teacher, someone who is full of mettå and other kusala dhammas. When we
think of such a person our citta becomes soft and malleable and we can then
be intent on ways to have kusala citta. We will do everything we can for the
benefit and wellbeing of that person. That is how we can begin with the
development of mettå.
The Visuddhimagga (IX, 93) states about the characteristic, function,
manifestation and proximate cause of mettå:

Mettå has the characteristic of promoting the aspect of welfare. Its function is
to prefer welfare. It is manifested as the removal of annoyance. Its proximate
cause is seeing lovableness in beings. It succeeds when it makes ill-will subside,
and it fails when it produces selfish affection.

It is difficult to be watchful as to our cittas, because we are so used to having


akusala. Attachment, aversion and ignorance arise time and again. In order to
Characteristics of mettå ● 39

develop kusala, paññå, right understanding of realities, is necessary. There


must be sati-sampajañña which knows the characteristic of the citta at a
particular moment, which knows whether there is kusala citta or akusala citta.
When we sincerely wish to do something for another person, not because of
attachment, not because he belongs to our circle of friends or relatives, not
because we expect affection in return, there is the characteristic of mettå.
In order to develop mettå we should have a detailed knowledge of our
cittas, we should carefully consider the different cittas which arise. It is in
daily life that we can truly develop mettå, when there is sati-sampajañña
which knows the characteristic of mettå which appears. We may happen to see
someone who has a peculiar appearance, or someone who is a foreigner,
someone who speaks a different language. How do we feel at such a moment?
Do we have the same feeling as if we see a friend or do we have a feeling of
antipathy? If we consider that person, whomever he may be, as a true friend,
there is the manifestation of mettå. As we have seen in the definition of mettå
in the Visuddhimagga, the manifestation of mettå is the removal of
annoyance, of displeasure.
When we see two people who are angry with each other or who quarrel and
we are partial to one of them there is no mettå but lobha. As we have seen in
the definition, when there is selfish affection the development of mettå fails.
We can consider the two people who are angry with one another as friends, it
does not matter who of the two acted in the proper way and who in the wrong
way. When we see someone who treated us badly, we can still have mettå
towards him, we can try to help him and we can think of his wellbeing. Then
there is true mettå which arises at such a moment. There is no mettå if we are
annoyed with the person who treated us badly, if we blame him and cause
him to be even more upset.
If someone has mettå he considers everybody as his friend. If there is a
sincere feeling of friendship for others there can also be compassion, karuùå,
when someone else has to experience sorrow and misfortune. If someone else
experiences happiness, if he has prosperity and success, there can be
sympathetic joy, muditå. If we try to help someone but that person cannot be
relieved from distress, we can develop the brahma-vihåra of equanimity,
upekkhå, and then we will not have aversion about the suffering of that
person. We can understand that all dhammas are dependant on their
appropriate conditions. The person who has to suffer receives the result of the
kamma he performed.
The four brahma-vihåras are excellent qualities which support all other
kinds of wholesome deeds so that these can develop and reach perfection. The
brahma-vihåras can support, for example, generosity. When an opportunity for
giving presents itself, we can give without partiality, whereas when we do not
develop the brahma-vihåras we may be inclined to give only to a particular
40 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

group of people. The brahma-vihåras are a condition for the perfecting of síla,
good moral conduct through action and speech. We can perform kusala
without expecting favours in return. We can forgive other people, whatever
harm they did to us. Mettå can indeed support the other brahma-vihåras of
compassion, sympathetic joy and equanimity, if the right conditions and the
proximate causes for the other brahma-vihåras are present.
We read in the Gradual Sayings (Book of the Fives, Chapter XVII, §1, The
putting away of Malice) that the Buddha teaches that we should develop all
four brahma-vihåras. We should not believe that mettå should first be
developed to a high degree and that after that the other three brahma-vihåras
can be developed. The text states:

Monks, there are five ways of putting away malice whereby all malice arisen in
a monk ought to be put away. What five?
Monks, in whatsoever person malice is engendered, in him loving-kindness
ought to be made to become more. In this way malice in him ought to be put
away.
Monks, in whomsoever malice is engendered, in him compassion...
equanimity ought to be made to become more. In this way malice in him ought
to be put away.
Monks, in whomsoever malice is engendered, in that man unmindfulness,
inattention to it, ought to be brought about. In this way malice in him ought to
be put away.
Monks, in whomsoever malice is engendered he should remember that
people are owners of their deeds. This should be firmly established in his mind.
He should think: This, reverend sir, is of one’s own making, he is the heir of his
deeds, deeds are the matrix, deeds are the kin, deeds are the foundation;
whatever one does, good or bad, one will become heir to that. In this way
malice in him ought to be put away.
Verily, monks, these are the five ways of putting away malice.

It is natural that we are annoyed or irritated about certain people, that we find
them disagreeable. Dosa may be strong and it may last for a long time, or it
may be less intense and disappear soon. We should remember that even when
coarse dosa, such as malice or ill-will arises, it can be subdued by the
development of the four brahma-vihåras.
We read in the following sutta (Gradual Sayings, Book of the Fives, Chapter
XVII, §2) that the venerable Såriputta said to the monks that, when anger
arises, one should have wise consideration of the different people one is angry
with. People are different as to their conduct through body, speech and mind.
Some people may perform good deeds through the body, but their speech and
thoughts are akusala. Some people perform akusala kamma (bad deeds)
Characteristics of mettå ● 41

through body and mind but their speech is wholesome. Some people are
impure as to their actions through body and speech but they can have mental
calm, they listen to the Dhamma and they are interested in it. Although they
develop calm their impurity as to body or speech appears from time to time.
We can think of these people without anger, annoyance can be subdued by the
development of mettå. There can be mettå when we think only of someone’s
good qualities which appear, we should not pay attention to what he does
wrong because then we will have aversion. It can happen that someone is
gentle in his behaviour and that he has agreeable speech but that his way of
thinking is not in accordance with his conduct through body and speech.
When we know this we should pay attention only to his good qualities, his
wholesome conduct through body and speech, and then mettå can arise. Some
people may have compassion when they think of someone else, they think of
his good qualities, for example, his wholesome conduct through body and
speech, or, if he has bad conduct through body and speech but he has mental
calm, they think of that quality. They may have compassion and may wish to
help the other person. This shows that they have made progress with the
development of the brahma-vihåras. We may not be angry with someone else,
but can there be compassion, do we really wish to help him if he is in trouble?
Can we have sympathetic joy when someone with whom we were annoyed
has prosperity, honour, praise and happiness? If people can rejoice at such an
occasion it shows that they have made progress with the development of the
brahma-vihåras.

In the “Mettå-sutta” (Gradual Sayings, Book of the Fours, Chapter XIII, §5) we
read about the results of the development of the four brahma-vihåras. When
someone develops calm and attains jhåna with mettå as meditation subject
and the jhåna does not decline, he is reborn in the plane of the “Devas of the
Brahma-group” and there the life-span is about one kappa. When someone
develops jhåna with compassion as subject and the jhåna does not decline he
is reborn in the plane of the “Radiant Devas” and there the life-span is about
two kappas. When someone develops jhåna with sympathetic joy as subject
and the jhåna does not decline, he is reborn in the plane of the “Ever-radiant
Devas” and there the life-span is about four kappas. When someone develops
jhåna with equanimity as subject and the jhåna does not decline he is reborn
in the plane of the “Vehapphala Devas” and there the life-span is about five
hundred kappas.
The development of mettå has many benefits, it supports other ways of
kusala, such as the “ways of showing sympathy”, which are: liberality, kindly
speech, beneficial actions and impartiality, as explained in the teachings.
Mettå conditions generosity in giving and it conditions kind, agreeable speech.
It makes one abstain from rude, disgracious conduct, from doing wrong to
42 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

others. We can help people with kindness and we can consider them as fellow-
beings who are friends. We can learn not to think of them with conceit, as
strangers who are different. We will learn not to think of them in terms of “he”
and “me”, or to consider them as superior or as inferior in comparison with
ourselves, because that is conceit. When we investigate the characteristic of
our citta we will know from our own experience that kusala citta is completely
different from akusala citta.
The Dhammasangaùi (Buddhist Psychological Ethics, the first book of the
Abhidhamma, §1340) refers to wholesome qualities such as plasticity,
gentleness, smoothness, pliancy, and humbleness of heart. The commentary to
this passage (Atthasåliní II, Book III, 395) describes humbleness of heart as
follows:

“by the absence of conceit this person’s heart is humble; the state of such a
person is humbleness of heart.”

Softness, gentleness, pliancy and humbleness of heart, these qualities are


characteristics of mettå. Såriputta was an example of humility. He compared
himself with a dust rag, an old rag without any value. He had no arrogance,
he was not conceited about it that he was one of the foremost disciples. Even
when others behaved badly towards him through body or speech he was
unaffected by it since he was an arahat. He had eradicated conceit and all the
other defilements and thus he was of perfect gentleness and humility.
Can we have true humility? When there is unwholesomeness in our actions
and speech we should be mindful of the characteristic of citta at such
moments. We can find out that we are full of defilements and that these
condition our behaviour and speech. When there is sincere humility there
cannot be unwholesome speech. Our behaviour and our speech reflect our
citta: kusala citta or akusala citta. Is there mettå or is there conceit? If we
want to strive earnestly for the eradication of defilements we should be
mindful of the different cittas. Then we will notice what our normal behaviour
and speech is in our daily life. We will know when they are motivated by
akusala citta and when by kusala citta.
● 43

Chapter 5
Mettå in action and speech

Mettå supports other kusala dhammas, it is also a condition for patience. We


read in the Dhammasangaùi:

§1341: What is patience (khanti)?


That patience which is long-suffering, compliance, absence of rudeness and
abruptness, complacency of citta.
§1342: What is temperance (soraccaÿ)?
That which is the absence of excess in deed, in word, and in deed and word
together. Besides, all moral self-restraint (saóvara síla) is temperance.
§1343: What is amity (såkhalyaÿ)?
When all such speech as is insolent, disagreeable, scabrous, harsh to others,
vituperative to others, bordering upon anger, not conducive to concentration, is
put away, and when all such speech as is innocuous, pleasant to the ear,
affectionate, such as goes to the heart, is urbane, sweet and acceptable to
people generally; when speech of this sort is spoken, polished, friendly and
gentle speech, this is what is called amity.

We read in the Atthasåliní (Book II, Part II, Chapter II, 396) the following
explanation of the passage on amity in the Dhammasangaùi:

In the exposition of amity, “insolent” means, as knobs protrude in a decaying or


unhealthy tree, so, owing to faultiness, knobs are produced from words of
abusing and slandering, etc. “Scabrous” means putrid, like a putrid tree. As a
putrid tree is scabrous and has trickling, powdery tissue, so such speech is
scabrous and enters as though piercing the ear. “Harsh to others” means bitter
to the ears of others, not pleasant to their hearts and productive of dosa.
“Vituperative to others” means, as a branch with barbed thorns sticks by
penetrating into leather, so it sticks to others and clings on, hindering those
who want to go. “Bordering on anger” means near to anger. “Not conducive to
concentration” means not conducive to attainment concentration (appanå-
samådhi) and access-concentration. All these terms are synonyms of the words
“with hate”...
“Pleasant to the ear”, that is, from sweetness of diction it is pleasant to the
ear; it does not produce pain to the ear, like the piercing of a needle. And from
the sweetness of sense and meaning not producing ill-temper in the body, it
44 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

produces affection, and so is called “affectionate”. That speech which appeals


to the heart, which enters the mind easily without striking, we say “goes to the
heart”. “Urbane speech” is so called because it is full of good qualities, and
because it is refined like well-bred persons, and because it is of the town
(urban). It means talk of citizens. For these use appropriate speech and
address fatherly men as fathers, and brotherly men as brothers. “Of-much-folk-
sweetness” means sweet to many people. “Of-much-folk-pleasantness” means
pleasant to many people and making for the growth of mind. “The speech
which there”, that is, in that person, “is gentle”, i.e. polished, “friendly”, that is
soft, “smooth”, that is, not harsh.

In connection with amity there is another term, namely “courtesy”


(patisanthåro). One should not merely have speech which is blameless,
pleasant to the ears, affectionate, which goes to the heart and which is urbane.
It is important to have also courtesy through loving-kindness. When one really
develops mettå one is not without courtesy. We read in the Dhammasangaùi:

§1344: What is courtesy (patisanthåro)?


The two forms of courtesy: hospitality towards bodily needs and
considerateness in matters of the Dhamma. When anyone shows courtesy it is
in one or other of these two forms.

There cannot be real courtesy if there is no mettå. When there is sincere


courtesy in daily life it is evident that there is mettå-citta. If we do not have
courtesy in our daily life we should develop mettå so that we can help other
people with courtesy in our deeds and speech.
The Atthasåliní (397) explains the term courtesy:

In the exposition of courtesy, “carnal courtesy” (åmisa patisanthåro) is the


closing, covering up, by means of bodily needs, the gap which might exist
between oneself and others owing to those needs not getting satisfied.

Thus, this refers to helping others by giving them things they need, by looking
after them. There is a gap or separation between people all the time, between
those who posses things and those who are needy. However, there is a means
to close such a gap and that is by material courtesy, by giving assistance with
material things, helping those in need. Then there is no longer a separation or
distance between people.
As to “Dhamma courtesy” (dhamma patisanthåro), this is the closing of the
gap which might exist between oneself and others who did not learn the
Dhamma. When we see the benefit of the Dhamma and we think it
appropriate to help others by explaining the Dhamma there is courtesy of
Mettå in action and speech ● 45

Dhamma. Then the Dhamma covers completely the gap or separation between
people.
We read further on in the Atthasåliní (398) about material courtesy of the
monk:

A courteous bhikkhu, on seeing a guest arrive, should meet him and take his
bowl and robe, offer him a seat, fan him with palmyra leaf, wash his feet, rub
him with oil; if there be butter and syrup he should give him medicine, offer him
water, scour up the monastery—thus in one part is material courtesy shown.

Lay-followers should consider by which means they can in their own situation
show material courtesy. As to Dhamma courtesy by which people can help one
another, we read in the Atthasåliní:

Moreover, at eventide, if there be no junior who comes to pay his respects, the
bhikkhu should go to the presence of his guest, sit there and, without asking
him irrelevant things, question him on relevant things. He should not ask
“What texts do you recite?” but should ask “What scriptural text does your
teacher and spiritual adviser use?” and should question him on points within his
capacities. Should the guest be able to answer, that is good; if not, he himself
should give the reply. Thus in one part is courtesy of Dhamma shown.

This shows that there is thoughtfulness when we speak with mettå. When we
want to help others with Dhamma we should not explain what is beyond the
listeners capacity to understand or to receive. We should take into
consideration the accumulations and the disposition of the listener and speak
about the Dhamma in such a way that he can understand it.
Mettå supports other kusala dhammas and it has many benefits. If we know
about these benefits we can verify for ourselves whether mettå is already of
such degree that we can have them. Thus, reading about them can remind us
to develop mettå to that degree.
We read in the “Mettå-sutta” (Gradual Sayings, Book of the Eights, Chapter
I, §1):

Thus have I heard:


Once the Exalted One was dwelling near Såvatthí, at Jeta Grove, in
Anåthapiùèika’s Park. There the Exalted One addressed the monks, saying:
“Monks”.
“Yes, lord, ” they replied, and the Exalted One said:
Monks, by the release of the heart through mettå (mettå cetovimutti),
practised, made become, made much of, made a vehicle and a basis, exercised,
augmented and set going, eight advantages are to be expected. What eight?
46 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

Happy one sleeps; happy one awakes; one sees no bad dreams; one is dear
to humans; one is dear to non-humans; devas guard one; neither fire, nor
poison, nor sword affects one; and though one penetrate not the beyond, one
reaches the Brahmå world.
Monks, by the release of the heart through amity, practised, made become,
made much of, made a vehicle and a basis, exercised, augmented and set
going, these eight advantages are to be expected.

Who does make mettå to grow


Boundless and thereto sets his mind,
Seeing the end of birth’s substrate
In him the fetters are worn away.
If with a heart unsoiled one feels
Mettå towards a single being,
He is a good man (just) by that.
Compassionate of heart to all
The ariyan boundless merit makes.
Those royal sages who, conquering
The creature teeming earth, have ranged
Round and about with sacrifice...
Such do not share a sixteenth part
The worth of mettå-citta made to grow,
Just as the radiance of the moon
Outshines all the starry host.
Who kills not nor makes others kill,
Robs not nor makes others rob,
Sharing goodwill with all that lives,
He has no hate for anyone.

One of the benefits of the development of mettå is that one sleeps happily. If
we are angry with someone can we then sleep happily? If we are not angry
with anyone, if we have no hate and we can forgive anybody whatever wrong
he may have done, we can really sleep happily. If sati-sampajañña arises when
it is time to go to sleep, we can find out what type of citta arises before falling
asleep. We can find out whether there is at such a moment lobha, dosa,
satipaììhåna or mettå. If we develop satipaììhåna there can be paññå which
knows the characteristics of realities as they are. When the reality which
appears at a particular moment is akusala, sati-sampajañña (paññå arising
with sati) can realize akusala as akusala. Paññå can distinguish the difference
between kusala dhamma and akusala dhamma and thus it is able to eliminate
akusala more and more. The development of kusala is the only way to have
the benefit of sleeping happily.
Mettå in action and speech ● 47

Waking up happily is another benefit. When it is time to get up in the


morning we can find out whether mettå has been sufficiently developed so
that we can have this benefit. If there is anger remaining in our heart, the citta
will be disturbed when we wake up; we are preoccupied with events we can’t
forget. In reality there is no self, being or person, but there are conditions for
citta to be disturbed. As soon as we wake up saññå (remembrance)
remembers the event which causes us to be annoyed. Or when we have done
something wrong and we worry because of this, we cannot help thinking of
this as soon as we wake up. When we have done something wrong we are
likely to worry about it and to feel unhappy when we go to sleep, and then we
are also unhappy when we wake up. When there is akusala citta before going
to sleep there will also be akusala citta as soon as we wake up. When there is
akusala citta rooted in lobha, and there is no mindfulness of it, we will not
realize it that there is clinging as soon as we wake up. There is clinging to the
objects which appear through eyes, ears, nose, tongue, body-sense and mind-
door. We usually do not notice attachment to the sense objects when it is of a
slight degree and we do not see its disadvantage and danger.
Dosa is a reality which is more coarse and thus it is less difficult to realize it
as akusala than in the case of lobha. When there is dosa the citta is disturbed
and unhappy. Lobha is not coarse and fierce like dosa, it is difficult to realize
it as akusala. If we develop satipaììhåna naturally, in daily life, we will know
the characteristics of realities just as they are, we will know when there is
lobha and when there is dosa.
One of the benefits of the development of mettå is not having bad dreams.
Unwholesome, impure thoughts can arise even in dreams, they cannot be
prevented. Our accumulated inclinations condition the arising of cittas in
mind-door processes which think about the objects which were formerly
experienced through the six doors. We remember all these objects and dwell
on them with our thoughts. People’s accumulated defilements condition
different dreams. We can sometimes know whether there were kusala cittas or
akusala cittas while we were dreaming. Then we can scrutinize ourselves as to
our accumulations, we can see whether kusala or akusala has been
accumulated. If one has accumulated a great deal of mettå one will not have
bad dreams, thus, there will not be akusala citta which dreams.
“One is dear to humans” is another benefit of the development of mettå. Do
we know of ourselves whether we are usually liked by others? When we
investigate the characteristics of our cittas we can know why we are liked or
disliked by others. Some people blame kamma of the past for the fact that,
although they do all kinds of good deeds they are still not liked by other
people. Therefore they feel slighted and disappointed. Other people can hurt
or harm us only through their actions and speech. When they speak in a
disagreeable way, the rúpa which is ear-sense is a condition to hear different
48 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

sounds which can disturb us. However, in reality our citta cannot be harmed
by someone else at all, it can only be harmed by ourselves. Other people can
only cause us to have bodily suffering; it is our own akusala citta which is the
cause of mental suffering. Thus, instead of thinking of all the different things
which cause us to be distressed we should cultivate mettå and we should
forgive other people. Then the citta is not disturbed and it is evident that
nobody can do harm to our citta.
We want to be dear to others but we may forget that we ourselves should
also show affection to other people. We should not expect that other people
will first show kindness and affection; there should be no delay in being kind
and considerate to others. At such moments we have no sadness or worry. The
citta with mettå is kusala, at that moment there is no lobha, no wish to have
affection from someone else in return.
If one knows the characteristic of kusala citta and discerns the difference
between kusala citta and akusala citta there are conditions to develop a great
deal of kusala without being concerned about it whether one is liked by other
people or not. When there is mettå and generosity, when one helps other
people, there is the cetasika chanda, “wish-to-do”, which conditions the arising
of kusala citta. The desire for kusala is different from lobha. When lobha arises
we desire to be liked by others. Whereas when kusala chanda arises, we desire
to develop loving-kindness towards others, even when we do not receive any
kindness from them.
If satipaììhåna is not developed, we cannot clearly distinguish between the
different characteristics of lobha and of kusala chanda which desires the
development of kusala. There may be attachment to the development of
kusala or to the benefits of kusala because clinging cannot yet be eliminated.
We know that good deeds bring their appropriate results but when we have
expectations, when we hope that our good deeds will bring pleasant results,
there is lobha. When there is kusala chanda, desire for the development of
kusala, there is no attachment, there are no expectations with regard to the
result of kusala. Then we can develop kusala with a sincere inclination, we can
develop it naturally and spontaneously.
“One is dear to non-humans”, this is another benefit of the development of
mettå. When there is chanda, desire for the development of kusala, we do not
expect to be liked by human beings nor by non-humans, because we do not
hope for the result of kusala, we do not hope for any benefit. When there is
pure kusala one is dear to non-humans.
“Devas guard one”, this is another benefit. When we develop mettå, kusala
citta has as effect that we are dear to humans and non-humans and that devas
guard us with mettå. The right cause brings its appropriate effect, and there is
no need to wish for such result.
“ Neither fire, nor poison nor sword affects one”, this is another benefit.
Mettå in action and speech ● 49

When there is pure kusala citta with mettå, it can protect us from dangers,
even if we have not attained “access concentration” or jhåna. When someone
develops calm with mettå as meditation subject and his kusala citta is of such
degree of steadfastness that jhåna can be attained, he will not be affected by
fire, poison or sword.
“ Even when one does not reach the highest, one will be reborn in the
Brahmå world”, this is another benefit, which, as I shall explain, shows clearly
that satipaììhåna should be developed together with all the other kinds of
kusala. When someone develops samatha with mettå as subject, and he can
attain calm which is steadfast, and which is of the degree that the first jhåna
can be reached, the result can be rebirth in the brahma-plane of the first
jhåna. When higher stages of jhåna are attained, the result is rebirth in higher
brahma-planes in accordance with the stage of jhåna which produces rebirth.
However, the highest benefit which can be reached is, after the realisation of
the four noble Truths at enlightenment, to attain the state of the arahat, the
perfected one. Then there will be the end of rebirth. The text states that when
one does not penetrate to the highest dhamma, that is, the state of the arahat,
one will be reborn in the brahma-world. What is most important is the
realisation of the noble Truths. This should be one’s goal. Therefore mettå
should be developed together with satipaììhåna and not merely for the sake of
attaining calm to the degree of access concentration or jhåna. We should
develop satipaììhåna time and again in our daily life, and then the other kinds
of kusala will also grow.
As we read in the sutta, the Buddha also said that the person who, with
mindfulness established, develops boundless mettå will realize the elimination
of attachment and all other “fetters”. He will not harm any being while he
develops mettå-citta, he will only be intent on what is wholesome. He has
compassion for all beings, he is an excellent person with abundant merit.
50 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism
● 51

Chapter 6
Benefits of mettå

We read about eleven benefits of mettå in the Gradual Sayings (Book of the
Elevens, Chapter II, §5, Advantages):

Monks, eleven advantages are to be looked for from the release of heart
(cetovimutti) by the practice of mettå, by making mettå to grow, by making
much of it, by making mettå a vehicle and a basis, by persisting in it, by
becoming familiar with it, by well establishing it. What are the eleven?
One sleeps happy and wakes happy; he sees no evil dream; he is dear to
human beings and non-human beings alike; the devas guard him; fire, poison or
sword afflict him not; quickly he concentrates his mind; his complexion is
serene; he makes an end without bewilderment; and if he has penetrated no
further (to arahatship) he reaches (at death) the Brahma-world.
These eleven advantages are to be looked for from the release of heart by
the practice of mettå...by well establishing mettå.

The same eleven benefits of the development of mettå are mentioned in the
Path of Discrimination (Treatise XVI, loving-kindness). The Path of
Discrimination deals with the development of mettå which is fortified by the
five “spiritual faculties” or indriyas (confidence, energy, sati, concentration
and understanding), and the five powers, balas. The indriyas develop in
satipaììhåna, and they can become firm and unshakable, they can become
“powers”. If one does not develop satipaììhåna in one’s daily life it is difficult
to have true loving-kindness, because mettå needs the support of the indriyas
and powers which develop in satipaììhåna. To the degree that mettå is
supported by these cetasikas, it becomes more established; there will be less
disturbance by defilements and this means more calm. When mettå is well
established it is unshakable, it does not waver because of defilements. Thus,
for the development of mettå there must be a detailed knowledge of one’s
different cittas, there must be sati sampajañña which knows when there is
wavering and when mettå is firm and unshakable. In order to know this, right
understanding of one’s cittas is indispensable. Defilements can only be
eradicated by paññå which knows the characteristic of the reality appearing
right now. Right understanding of this very moment should be developed,
because what is past has gone already and the future has not come yet. Paññå
which arises falls away again but because each citta which falls away is
52 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

succeeded by the next one, paññå can be accumulated from moment to


moment, and in this way there are conditions for paññå to become more
established.
When we read about the benefits of mettå we can, instead of wishing for
these benefits, check to what extent we have developed mettå already. If we
do not have these eleven benefits it is evident that we have not sufficiently
developed mettå.
Question: The arahat is habitually inclined to mettå. Why did Mahå
Moggallåna have to be killed through the sword?
Khun Sujin: That was the result of past kamma. Of course, since the time he
had become an arahat, he did not commit any more kamma.
Question: I would think that since he was an arahat he could not receive
such a result of kamma. Past akusala kamma would be in this case “ahosi
kamma”, kamma which is ineffectual.
Khun Sujin: So long as the arahat has not passed away there are still
conditions for past kamma to produce result. When the arahat has finally
passed away there is no more rebirth, no more arising of citta, cetasika and
rúpa, and then there cannot be anymore receiving of the result of kamma.
When sati arises we can find out whether there is mettå, we can know
whether it is strong or weak. Sati can be aware of the characteristic of mettå,
it can find out whether there is true mettå or not. The characteristic of mettå
may be confused with the characteristic of lobha. If there is no sati
sampajañña it cannot be known whether there is mettå or lobha. We usually
want other people to be happy, but do we want this because we love them
with attachment or because we have true loving-kindness for them without
any selfishness? When there is sati sampajañña we will know whether there is
at such a moment lobha or mettå. When we really understand the difference
mettå can develop and lobha can decrease.
People may doubt whether there is lobha or mettå when they want their
parents to be happy, because lobha and mettå seem to be similar. When we
think of the good qualities of our parents and we desire their welfare there is
kusala citta with mettå. When we love our parents and we are attached to
them there is lobha. It is the same with the relationship of parents towards
children, when they have selfish affection or possessive love for their children;
there is lobha. However, if they have listened to the Dhamma and developed
satipaììhåna and if they can distinguish the difference between the
characteristics of mettå and of lobha, they will have more mettå towards their
children and less attachment. If they do not develop mettå there will be
selfishness, they consider their child as “our child”. Attachment to one’s child
can even lead to harming someone else’s child. In that case there is no mettå
towards one’s child but selfish affection.
We read in the Visuddhimagga, in the section on the Divine Abiding of
Benefits of mettå ● 53

Mettå (IX, 11), that if a person wants to develop mettå he should extend it
first towards someone who has moral excellence and other good qualities,
someone he esteems and respects, such as his teacher. When we think of the
qualities of such a person our mind becomes gentle, we have no thoughts of
malevolence. We wish to help our teacher, to do everything for his benefit and
happiness. Thus, the citta which thinks of the good qualities of one’s teacher is
gentle and mellow, it is citta with mettå. When we are happy to give
assistance to someone we meet in daily life, in the same way as we would give
assistance to our teacher, it is evident that we have mettå towards that person.
The Buddha praised the development of mettå, even if it is just for a short
moment. We should not think that there is any kind of kusala which is
unimportant, we should remember that even a short moment of kusala is
beneficial. We read in the Kindred Sayings (II, Nidåna vagga, Chapter XX,
Kindred Sayings on Parables, §4, The rich gift) that the Buddha, while he was
staying at Såvatthí, at the Jeta Grove, said to the monks:

If anyone, monks, were to give a morning gift of a hundred “ukkas”, and the
same at noon and the same at eventide, or if anyone would develop mettå in
the morning, at noon or at eventide, even if it were as slight as one pull at a
cow’s udder, this practice would be by far the more fruitful of the two.
Wherefore, monks, thus should you train yourselves: liberation of heart by
mettå (mettå cetovimutti) we will develop, we will often practise it, we will
make it a vehicle and a base, take our stand upon it, store it up, thoroughly set
it going.

The Buddha taught that all kusala dhammas can be gradually developed. Even
if one finds it difficult to develop kusala, it can be accumulated so that it can
arise more often and become more powerful. We should not think that we can
have a great deal of mettå immediately, but each short moment of mettå is a
condition that mettå develops. Otherwise the Buddha would not have taught
that mettå even for the duration of one pull of a cow’s udder is beneficial.
When we develop mettå we should know for what purpose we develop it.
Do we develop it in order to attain calm to the degree of access concentration
or attainment concentration? Or do we want to develop it in our daily life?
Mettå and the other “perfections” are necessary conditions for the realisation
of the four Noble Truths at enlightenment. We are bound to be for an
endlessly long time in the cycle of birth and death, and we do not know when
the perfections will have developed to the degree that enlightenment can be
attained. Therefore, we should develop all kinds of kusala in order that
eventually defilements can be completely eradicated and the state of the
arahat can be attained. Only then will there be the end of the cycle of birth
and death. Some people believe that defilements can be eradicated without
54 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

the development of mettå. Or they believe that mettå is too difficult and
therefore they do not develop it. They do not understand that mettå should be
developed in order that it can arise again and again. Only if it arises time and
again it can gradually be accumulated. We may believe that mettå is too
difficult but we should remember that the arising of paññå which realizes the
noble Truths is even more difficult. We should not be discouraged, we should
not give akusala the opportunity to gain in strength by wrongly believing that
mettå is too difficult, that it cannot arise and that it therefore should not be
developed. When sati arises we can have right understanding of the
development of mettå: we can see that it can arise, that it can be developed
little by little. In this way mettå will become more powerful, it will become
steadfast. There can be mettå with our actions, our speech and our thoughts.
When we begin to develop mettå it is necessary to first see the disadvantage
of dosa, aversion or anger. Dosa is the dhamma which is opposed to mettå.
Whenever dosa arises it is evident that mettå is lacking. Dosa is the dhamma
(reality) which is harsh, it causes harm to ourselves and to others. When dosa
arises it overwhelms the citta, it inflames citta like a fire. The destructive
power of dosa causes people to harm others through body and speech, in
various degrees in accordance with its strength. We read in the Kindred
Sayings (I, Sagåthå-vagga, I, The Devas, 8, Slaughter suttas, §1) that a deva
asked the Buddha:

What must we slay if we would live happily?


What must we slay if we would weep no more?
What is it above all other things, whereof
The slaughter you approve, Gotama?

The Buddha answered:

Wrath must you slay if you would live happily,


Wrath must you slay if you would weep no more.
Of anger, deva, with its poisoned root
And fevered climax which is sweet,
That is the slaughter by the ariyans praised;
That must you slay to weep no more.

This shows that when anger arises there is disturbance of mind, we are
unhappy. We have unkind thoughts or even malevolence, we may harm the
person we are angry with through body or speech so that he will suffer. We
can harm him in different ways, for example by violence, by hitting him and
causing him to suffer bodily injuries. Or we may utter harsh, fierce words.
When we have injured someone else through body and speech we may be
Benefits of mettå ● 55

satisfied with what we have done. The Buddha said that wrath has a
poisonous root and a sweet tip. The feeling of satisfaction we have when we
have done harm to someone else is compared to the sweet tip of anger, but its
root is poisoned. Each person will receive the result of his action. When dosa
conditions someone to do harm to another person there is akusala kamma
which has a poisonous root: akusala kamma produces an unpleasant result for
the person who performs it in the form of loss and other unpleasant
experiences. It can cause rebirth in unhappy planes such as a hell plane, the
plane of ghosts (petas) or demons (asuras), or rebirth as an animal, depending
on the degree of that akusala kamma.
If we see the disadvantage of akusala citta and akusala kamma we will
develop mettå in order to diminish the accumulation of the different akusala
dhammas. We should consider the benefit of patience, patience for the
development of kusala and perseverance with it, so that akusala can be
eliminated. We read in the Middle Length Sayings (I, no. 21, Discourse on the
Parable of the Saw) that the Buddha, while staying near Såvatthí, at the Jeta
Grove, said to the monks:

There are, monks, these five ways of speaking in which others when speaking to
you might speak: at a right time or at a wrong time; according to fact or not
according to fact; gently or harshly; on what is connected with the goal or on
what is not connected with the goal; with a mind of friendliness or full of
hatred. Monks, when speaking to others you might speak at a right time or at a
wrong time; monks, when speaking to others you might speak according to fact
or not according to fact; monks, when speaking to others you might speak
about what is connected with the goal or about what is not connected with the
goal; monks, when speaking to others you might speak with a mind of
friendliness or full of hatred. Herein, monks, you should train yourselves thus:
“Neither will our minds become perverted nor will we utter an evil speech, but
kindly and compassionate will we dwell, with a mind of friendliness, void of
hatred; and we will dwell having suffused that person with a mind of
friendliness; and, beginning with him, we will dwell having suffused the whole
world with a mind of friendliness that is far-reaching, widespread,
immeasurable, without enmity, without malevolence.” This is how you must
train yourselves, monks.

In this sutta several similes are used to show that when there is mettå there
cannot be any anguish. Mettå-citta is for example compared to a cat-skin bag
which is supple and well cured. Even when someone hits it with a piece of
wood no noise at all can be heard. In the same way, when there is mettå-citta,
there cannot be anything which could cause the arising of dosa. We read that
the Buddha said:
56 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

Monks, as low-down thieves might carve one limb from limb with a double-
handled saw, yet even then whoever sets his mind at enmity, he, for this
reason, is not a doer of my teaching...
● 57

Chapter 7
The blessings of mettå

The Buddha taught Dhamma to his followers out of compassion, he taught


them Dhamma for their benefit and happiness. When they had listened to the
Dhamma they could ponder over it and put it into practice. The Buddha
taught about the ill effects of anger. Anger leads to different kinds of suffering
for the person who is angry, but the person to whom anger is directed does
not have to suffer from it if he does not have anger himself. We read in the
Gradual Sayings (Book of Sevens, Chapter VI, §10) about the effects of anger.
The person who is angry looks ugly. Even though he bathes himself, anoints
himself, trims his hair and beard and dresses himself in clean, white linen, for
all that he is ugly, since he is overwhelmed by anger. When someone is angry
his face is tense, and sometimes his mouth may be distorted and his speech
blurred. He may lie on a couch spread with a fleecy cover, a white blanket, a
woollen coverlet, flower-embroidered, with crimson cushions, but for all that,
if he is overwhelmed by anger, he lies in discomfort. He may know what is
good and what is evil, but when he is overwhelmed by anger he does what is
harmful, not what is beneficial. When one performs unwholesome deeds
through body, speech and mind, one will have as result an unhappy rebirth in
lower planes, such as a hell plane or the animal world, depending on the
kamma which produces rebirth.
We read in the Gradual Sayings (Book of the Sevens, Chapter VI, §10.
Anger), that the Buddha said:

How ugly is an angry man! His sleep


Is comfortless; with fortune in his hands
He suffers loss; and being full of wrath
He wounds by act and bitter word. Overwhelmed
By rage, his wealth he wastes away. Made mad
And crazy by his bile, his name’s bemired.
With odium, shunned and forsaken is
An angry man by friend and relative.
By wrath is loss incurred; by wrath, the mind
Irate, he knows not that within
Fear is engendered, nor knows the goal.
When anger-bound, man Dhamma cannot see;
When anger conquers man, blind darkness reigns.
58 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

A man in wrath finds pleasure in bad deeds,


As in good deeds; yet later when his wrath
Is spent, he suffers like one scorched by fire:
As flame atop of smoke, he staggers on,
When anger spreads, when youth becomes incensed.
No shame, no fear of blame, no reverence
In speech has he whose mind is anger rent;
No island of support he ever finds.
The deeds which bring remorse, far from right states,
These I’ll proclaim. Listen how they come about.
A man in anger will his father kill,
In wrath his very mother will he slay,
Arahats and ordinary men alike he will kill.
By his mother’s care man sees the light
Of day, yet common average folk, in wrath,
Will still destroy that fount of life.
Self-mirrored all these beings are; each one
Loves self most. In wrath the ordinary men
Kill self, by divers forms distraught: by sword
Men kill themselves; in madness poison take;
And in some hollow of a mountain glen
They hide, and bind themselves with ropes and die.
Thus ruin runs in wake of wrath, and they
Who act in wrath, perceive not that their deeds,
Destroying life, bring death for themselves.
Thus lurking in the heart is Måra’s snare
In anger’s loathsome form. But root it out
By insight, zeal, right view, restraint; the wise
Would one by one eradicate each akusala,
And thus in Dhamma would he train himself:
Be not our minds obscured, but anger freed
And freed from trouble, greed and envy.
The well trained, the canker-freed. Become,
When anger is stilled, wholly, completely cool.

Question: I find what I heard about mettå very beneficial. However, mettå
does not arise whenever I wish in the situations of daily life. What should I do
in order that mettå can arise?
Khun Sujin: When someone takes realities for self he is inclined to believe
that there is a self who can, by following a particular method, suppress dosa
and develop sati and mettå. However, in reality there isn’t anybody who can
have sati and mettå if there are no conditions for their arising. Listening to the
Dhamma, wisely considering what one heard, intellectual understanding of
The blessings of mettå ● 59

the Dhamma are different moments of kusala. They are accumulated from
moment to moment, and together they make up conditions for the arising of
sati later on which is mindful of one’s different cittas. In this way the
disadvantage of dosa and the benefit of mettå can be seen. However, if sati
does not arise and there are conditions for dosa, dosa will arise. There is
nobody who can have sati and kindness at will. If sati arises and it can, time
and again, be mindful of the Dhamma which the Buddha explained, there are
conditions for the elimination of anger. If one does not often listen to the
Dhamma there are not many conditions for wise consideration of it and then it
is difficult to subdue dosa. Whereas if one listens a great deal there are
conditions for remembrance and wise consideration of the Dhamma. One may
for example reflect on kamma and its result. People are the owners of their
deeds. There can be wise consideration of akusala kamma which is motivated
by anger, it can be remembered that anger is not helpful for the attainment of
enlightenment. People can reflect on the development of patience by the
Buddha during his lives as a Bodhisatta, as it is described in the “Sílavanåga
Jåtaka” (I, 72), the “Khantivådi Jåtaka” (III, 313), the “Culladhammapåla
Jåtaka” (III, 358), or the “Chaddanta Jåtaka” (V, 514). They can apply what
they read in the Buddha’s teachings. The Buddha taught the Dhamma out of
compassion to his followers so that they would carefully consider it and put it
into practice.
I will quote from the “Mahå-mangala Jåtaka” (IV, 453) in order that the
meaning of “mangala”, auspicious sign or blessing, will be clearer. Everybody
desires blessings, things which are auspicious. Sometimes people search for it,
they believe that they have a mangala if they possess a particular thing or if
they recite particular texts. We should know what a real mangala is. We read
in the “Mahå-mangala Jåtaka” that mettå is a mangala. When we know that,
we will not search for something else. A true mangala is the citta with mettå,
mettå through body, speech and mind. When the citta is kusala, the citta is
beautiful, it is “auspicious”.
We read in the “Mahå-mangala Jåtaka” that people asked the Bodhisatta,
when he was a hermit, what a mangala is which gives blessings in this world
and the next. We read that the Bodhisatta explained:

Whoso the devas, and all the brahmas,


And reptiles, and all beings, which we see,
Honours forever with a kindly heart,
The wise call this a mangala.

Who is humble towards all beings


To men, women and children alike,
Who to reviling does not answer back,
60 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

His patience the wise call a mangala.

Who is of clear understanding, in crisis wise,


Nor playmates nor companions does despise,
Nor boasts of birth, wisdom, caste or wealth,
The wise call this a mangala for his friends.

Who takes good men and true his friends to be,


Who trust him, for his tongue from venom free,
Who never harms a friend, who shares his wealth,
The wise call this a mangala for his friends.

Whose wife is friendly and of equal years,


Devoted, good, and many children bears,
Faithful, virtuous, and of gentle birth.
The wise call that a mangala in wives.

Whose King the mighty Lord of beings is,


Who has purity of síla, is diligent,
And says, “He is my friend”, and means no guile,
That the wise call a mangala in Kings.

Who has confidence, gives food and drink,


Flowers, garlands and perfumes,
With heart at peace, and spreading joy around,
This the wise call a mangala in heavenly planes.

Whom by good living virtuous sages try


With effort strenuous to purify,
Good men and wise, by tranquil life built up,
The wise call this a mangala among the company of arahats.

These blessings then, that in the world befall,


Esteemed by all the wise,
Which man is prudent let him follow these,
The omens which are seen, heard or touched are not real.

Some people believe that when they see something special such as a red cow
there is a mangala, that it brings them luck. Others believe that when they
hear a special sound or words by which good wishes are conveyed to them,
there is a mangala which is heard. Others again believe that when they touch
particular things, such as a white dress or a white headgear, or when they
apply white powder, there is a mangala by touch. Or when they smell a
The blessings of mettå ● 61

particular flower, or taste a special flavour they believe that there is a mangala
through the senses of smell or taste. As we have read in the Jåtaka, there is no
truth in such omens experienced through the senses, they are based on
superstition. Mettå is a real mangala.
Question: Can one extend mettå to devas (heavenly beings)?
Khun Sujin: In respect to this, people should carefully consider which cause
brings which effect. In which way do we extend mettå to devas? In the human
plane mettå can be developed by dåna, by giving other people useful things, or
by síla, by abstaining from harming others, by abstaining from anger and
malevolence. As regards developing mettå towards devas, the situation is
different. Birth as a deva is produced by kusala kamma and the lifespan of
devas is extremely long. Its length depends on the degree of kusala kamma
which produced birth in that plane. Therefore we cannot extend mettå to
devas by abstaining from killing them or by abstaining from other kinds of
akusala kamma which could harm them. We can think with appreciation of
their good deeds which conditioned birth as a deva, thus, there can be
“anumodana dåna”. Or when we do good deeds we can extend merit to the
devas so that they can have anumodana dåna, kusala cittas with appreciation.
These are ways of extending mettå to devas.
Question: I do not understand yet how we can extend merit to devas when
we perform dåna or other kinds of kusala.
Khun Sujin: When we perform a good deed devas can appreciate such a
deed. However, one should not hope for their protection just by reciting texts.
When we have expectations there is lobha and that is different from
performing kusala and extending merit so that devas can appreciate one’s
kusala and also have kusala cittas.
Question: Thus, we can extend merit to devas?
Khun Sujin: Yes, when we perform kusala we can extend merit to devas.
However, human beings cannot give things such as food to devas, because
devas take a different kind of food, more refined than our food. Devas have
great wealth, they have precious stones such as diamonds and sapphires, they
have valuable jewellery, they have more riches than any king in the world.
This is due to their great merit which caused them to be born as devas. As a
human being one cannot offer them anything, one can only extend merit to
them when one does good deeds.
Someone may wish to extend mettå to devas by reciting texts on mettå, and
he may expect that they will protect him. However, when he, in spite of this,
meets misfortune and trouble, and thus his expectations about being protected
by the devas do not come true, he will be disappointed and he may blame the
devas. Whereas when the citta has true calm and it is only intent on kusala,
there is no expectation of any result, and thus people will not blame anyone,
there will be no disappointment or unhappiness.
62 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

Question: In Thailand there is the belief that one should pay respect to
guardian spirits and brahmas. Do they really exist and can they assist us?
Khun Sujin: First of all we should consider whether there is birth in other
planes of existence, such as the deva planes, and whether there are beings in
other planes such as guardian spirits and brahmas. There is birth in planes
other than the human plane, depending on the appropriate conditions. Birth
as a deva is the result of kusala kamma and this kind of birth is higher than
birth as a human being. Birth in a brahma plane is the result of jhåna. If
samatha has been developed to the degree of jhåna and the jhånacitta does
not decline but arises shortly before the dying-consciousness, it produces
rebirth-consciousness in a brahma plane. Thus beings who are brahmas really
exist.
Some people believe that there are sacred shrines or other objects they
should venerate, but why do they attach importance to such things? We
should remember that everybody is the owner of the deeds he has performed
himself. Kamma conditions people to have different pleasant or unpleasant
experiences in life. We see, hear, smell, taste and experience through body-
sense different objects, some pleasant, some unpleasant. Seeing, hearing,
smelling, tasting and the experience of tangible object are cittas which are
results of kamma, vipåkacittas. If there were no kammas which have been
performed and which are capable of producing vipåka, all those different
experiences could not arise.
As to the question about the assistance to people given by guardian spirits
and brahmas, each person is “heir” to his own deeds; that means: pleasant and
unpleasant experiences through the senses are produced accordingly by the
kamma he performed. Someone told me about an event which happened.
When he was driving his car with a little boy sitting beside him, his car slipped
off the road. However, the driver of a jeep who was immediately behind him
stopped and could help him to get the car back on the road again, because he
had the right equipment with him. The driver of the car who had this
experience understood that if there had been conditions for akusala kamma to
produce akusala vipåka (unpleasant result), he would not have received help
so soon and in that case he would have had to wait much longer to get his car
back on the road. We may receive help from another person, be he human or
non-human, but this also depends on kamma. If there are conditions for
akusala kamma to produce result, neither human being nor non-human being
can help us. From the example given above we see that accumulated kusala
kamma is like a close friend who is near and who can give protection and
assistance, who can solve problems in different situations.
● 63

Chapter 8
Cause and result in life

Some people may worship brahmas but they do not know where they are, how
one can be born as a brahma and what life as a brahma is like. We read in the
Kindred Sayings (I, Sagåthå-vagga, Chapter VI, The Brahmå Suttas, §3,
Brahmadeva) that people worshipped Brahmå already during the Buddha’s
time. The text states:

Thus have I heard: the Exalted One was once staying at Såvatthí, in the Jeta
Grove, in Anåthapiùèika’s Park.
Now on that occasion Brahmadeva, son of a certain brahminee, left the
world, going from home into the homeless in the Order of the Exalted One. And
the venerable Brahmadeva, remaining alone and separate, earnest, ardent, and
strenuous, attained ere long to that supreme goal of the higher life, for the
sake of which the clansmen rightly go forth from home into the homeless; that
supreme goal did he by himself, even in this present life, come to understand
and realize. He came to understand that birth was destroyed, that the holy life
was being lived, that his task was done, that for life as we conceive it, there
was no hereafter. And the venerable Brahmadeva thus became one of the
arahats.
Now the venerable Brahmadeva rose early one morning, and dressing
himself, took robe and bowl and entered Såvatthí for alms. And going about
Såvatthí, house by house, he came to his mother’s dwelling.
At that time his mother, the brahminee, was habitually making an oblation
to Brahmå. Then it occurred to Brahmå Sahampati: “This mother of the
venerable Brahmadeva, the brahminee, makes her perpetual oblation to
Brahmå. What if I were now to approach and agitate her?” So as a strong man
might stretch forth his bent arm, or bend his arm stretched forth, Brahmå
Sahampati vanished from the Brahmå world and appeared at the dwelling of
the mother of the venerable Brahmadeva. And standing in the air he addressed
her in verses:

Far from here, O brahminee, is Brahma’s world,


To whom you always serves offerings.
And Brahmå does not take food like that.
What babble you unwitting of the way,
O brahminee, unto the Brahma world.
64 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

Look at Brahmadeva, your son,


A man who will never see another world,
A man who past the gods has won his way,
An almsman who does nothing call his own,
Who only maintains himself,
This man has come into your house for alms,
Worthy of offerings, versed in the Vedas,
With faculties developed and controlled.
It is suitable for devas and men to offer to him
True brahmin, barring all things evil out,
By evil undefiled, grown calm and cool,
He moves on his alms round.
There is no after, no before for him,
He is at peace, no fume of vice is his;
He is untroubled, rid of hankering;
All force renouncing toward both weak and strong.
Let him enjoy the choice food you have served.
By all the hosts of evil unassailed,
His heart at utter peace, he goes about
Like tamed elephant, with vices purged.
Almsman most virtuous, and with heart well freed:
Let him enjoy the choice food you have served.
To him so worthy of the gift do you,
In confidence unwavering, offer your gift.
Work merit and your future happiness,
Now that you see here, O brahminee,
A sage by whom the flood is overpassed.
To him so worthy of the gift did she,
In confidence unwavering offer her gift.
Merit she wrought, her future happiness,
When (at her door) the brahminee saw
A sage by whom the flood was overpassed.

Should one make an offering to an arahat or to Brahmå? When one has right
understanding one will know that it is better to make an offering to an arahat
who has eradicated all defilements. He has accomplished the task which has to
be done and there is nothing more to be done by him since all defilements
have been completely eradicated. Although the son of the brahminee had
attained arahatship, the brahminee still paid respect to Brahmå and she made
continuously offerings of food to him. The brahma planes are far away from
the human plane, the distance to those planes is immeasurable. Brahmas
cannot eat food offered by humans. The brahminee did not know how the
Cause and result in life ● 65

brahma world could be reached, but she offered food to Brahmå and in her
ignorance she mumbled words to him over and over again.
The Såratthappakåsiní, the Commentary to the Kindred Sayings, gives an
elaboration of the story about the Brahminee.

When the mother of Brahmadeva had seen her son approaching her house, she
went outside to welcome him. She invited him to come inside and to sit on a
seat she had prepared. It was her custom to offer rice cakes to Brahmå and
also on that day she performed sacrificial worship. Her whole house was
decorated with fresh green leaves and puffed rice, with precious stones and
flowers. She had put up different kinds of flags and banners and she had laid
out water vessels. She had lighted candles contained in candle holders which
were decorated with garlands and many fragrant things. People went around in
procession. The brahminee herself had got up very early in the morning. After
she had bathed herself with fragrant water taken from sixteen pots, she put on
beautiful cloths and precious jewellery. She invited her son, the arahat, to come
inside, but she had no intention to offer him even a ladle of rice. She only
wanted to attend to Mahå Brahmå, to make sacrificial worship to him. She
filled a golden tray with rice, prepared with ghee, honey and sugar. She carried
the tray to the backyard which she had decorated with fresh green leaves. She
had put a lump of rice on each of the four corners of the tray and took one
lump at a time in her hand while the ghee was dripping on her arms. She knelt
down on the ground and recited an invitation to Mahå Brahmå to partake of
the food.
In the meantime Brahmå Sahampati inhaled the fragrance of the síla of the
arahat which rose to all deva planes and was diffused even as far as the
brahma planes. The odours of the human world do not reach the brahma
planes, it is only the fragrance of the excellent qualities of arahats which can
be diffused as far as that. It occurred to Sahampati that he should admonish
the brahminee and explain to her what would be the right thing for her to do.
He said to her: “You have not even given a ladle of rice to your son after he sat
down, although he is most worthy of offerings. Instead you have only thought of
offering food to Mahå Brahmå. The situation is the same as when someone
who has scales for weighing discards them and just uses his hands, or someone
who has a drum does not make use of it but beats on his stomach instead, or
someone who has a fire does not make use of it but uses a firefly instead. ”
Sahampati wanted to induce her to change her mind, to offer food to her son
the arahat instead of offering it to Mahå Brahmå.
He said to himself: “I will cause her wrong view to disappear and save her
from an unhappy plane. I will convert her to the Buddha’s teachings so that she
will accumulate an immeasurable treasure, namely kusala kamma which will
produce as result rebirth in a heavenly plane.”
The distance from here to the brahma planes is difficult to fathom. If a stone
66 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

which has the size of a tall building would travel from the lowest brahma plane
as fast as 48.000 yojanas (one yojana being 16 km) a day, it would take four
months before it would reach the earth. The lowest brahma plane is as far as
that, and the higher planes are still further away.
Sahampati said: “Very far indeed is the world of Brahmå, to whom you,
Brahminee, are making the offering of food. The real way to attain to the world
of Brahmå are the kusala jhånacittas of the four stages of jhåna. These give as
results the four types of vipåka jhånacittas which arise in the brahma planes.
You do not know the way to attain the world of Brahmå, you are only mumbling
some prayers. Those who are in brahma planes keep alive by jhåna rapture and
not by taking rice or drinking boiled milk. You should not trouble yourself with
things which are not the real condition for the attainment to the world of
Brahmå.”
When Sahampati had spoken thus and respectfully took leave of the
Brahminee, he pointed to the arahat and spoke again:
“Brahminee, your son Brahmadeva has eradicated all defilements, he is the
highest among devas, the highest among brahmas. He is no more disturbed by
defilements. He is an almsman who has the habit of asking, who does not
provide a livelihood for someone else. The great Brahmadeva who entered your
house for alms is the person who is most worthy to receive an offering of food.”

This is the story related by the Commentary. In order to be reborn as a


brahma in a brahma plane there must be the right condition. One should
develop samatha to the stage of jhåna, which can be rúpa-jhåna or arúpa-
jhåna. This is the way to rúpa-brahma planes and arúpa-brahma planes. The
result of kusala jhånacitta is rebirth in a brahma plane where one will live
until the jhåna kusala kamma has been exhausted and one will pass away
from that plane. Beings in brahma planes do not need to eat and they do not
need to breathe in order to stay alive. Beings in the rúpa-brahma planes have
very subtle rúpas and these do not have to be sustained by morsels of food
such as is taken by human beings, and they do not have to experience
suffering due to breathing. As regards beings in the arúpa-brahma planes, they
do not have any rúpa.
As the Commentary states, Brahmadeva had eradicated all defilements, he
was the highest among devas. The arahat who is not disturbed by defilements
does not have to provide a livelihood for someone else. When one hears this
one thinks of the bhikkhus who do not have a family and who do not have a
profession by which they have to provide a livelihood for others. However,
there is a deeper meaning to these words. The meanings is that for the arahat
there are no more conditions for rebirth, for the arising of khandhas in a
future life. So long as one still has defilements, there will be a new life after
this one, conditioned by these defilements. When at the end of life the dying-
Cause and result in life ● 67

consciousness has fallen away there will be rebirth, there will be nåma
khandhas and rúpa khandhas succeeding the khandhas which are arising and
falling away in this life, which we take for “I” or “mine”, for “my personality”.
Our present life conditions the life of a future being, of someone else, namely
the khandhas arising in the future which are conditioned by the khandhas in
this life. In this sense it is said that we maintain or sustain the life of someone
else.
The Brahmadeva Sutta can answer the questions about spirits and brahmas
who are venerated in Thailand, questions about whether they exist and
whether they can help us.
Question: I believe that there is someone who is an avenger, who can cause
us to suffer misfortune. When we do good deeds and then transfer the merit to
this person can that be to our benefit? When one develops samådhi can one
then see such a person?
Khun Sujin: The Buddha taught about cause and effect and we should
carefully consider this. Is it true that there is someone who could inflict
retribution on us and thus control our fate? We read in the Gradual Sayings
(Book of the Tens, Chapter XXI, §6) that the Buddha taught to the monks
about kamma and its result:

Monks, beings are owners of their deeds, heirs to their deeds, they are the
womb of their deeds, their deeds are their relatives, to them their deeds come
home again. Whatsoever deeds they do, be they good or evil, of these deeds
they are the heirs.

When someone is born as this person into this world, what is the cause? Is this
caused by the kamma he performed himself or by someone else who controls
his fate?
When a person has gain, honour, praise, happiness, or when he has loss,
dishonour, blame and misery, by what are these caused? Are they caused by
someone else who controls his fate or are they results of deeds he has
performed himself?
People believe that someone to whom they in former lives caused suffering
can have power over their fate, that he follows them in this life and causes
them to be ill or to suffer different kinds of misfortunes. Or if such a person
has not caused their misfortune yet, they believe that they should extend merit
to him so that he will not cause them to suffer.
Who can remember his former lives and the deeds he performed during
those lives? Who can remember to which being he caused trouble and
suffering in past lives? If someone, for example, has killed another person and
then extends merit to him how could this prevent the killing which is akusala
kamma from producing result? One should know who the owner is of the
68 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

kammas which have been performed during the cycle of birth and death.
Akusala kamma such as killing can cause rebirth in a hell plane. Or if one is
born in the human plane akusala kamma can cause one to be sick or to suffer
misfortune. Kusala kamma can cause rebirth in a happy plane, such as rebirth
as a human being, or as a deva in one of the heavenly planes. Rebirth is in
accordance with the kamma one performed oneself. If there is an unhappy
rebirth it is not due to any revenge of another being. There is no one who
could rule over someone’s destiny.
If people believe in a person who could retaliate, how is their relationship to
such a person? If they think that there is a person who could take revenge
then they themselves could also be someone who takes revenge on another
person. However, when someone has no ill feeling towards others could he
take revenge and cause someone else’s misfortune? We may remember ill
deeds in this life which we have committed to someone else and ill deeds
which others have committed to us, but we do not remember the deeds which
were committed in past lives. We would not be able to remember to whom we
did wrong ourselves, nor would others be able to remember such things. Thus
the belief in someone who could take revenge for the wrongs a person
formerly did to him and who could cause his misfortune in this life is without
foundation. The transfer of merit to such a person is also useless, it does not
have any effect.
Every being has performed many kammas during countless aeons in the
past. People are born and they must die, they are born again and must die
again, and thus they are now no longer the same person they were in the past.
We should not think of a person in the past who could take revenge, but
instead we should remember that in this life one should have no anger, no
revengeful feeling, no wish to harm or hurt anyone. People may have aversion
or anger or they may even want to hurt someone else when they think that he
in this life or in a former life caused them misfortune or suffering. However,
one should subdue one’s anger and feelings of revenge and not commit any
deed motivated by anger. Instead, one should develop mettå and make it
increase.
● 69

Chapter 9
Mettå: the foundation of the world

The Buddha said that beings are owners of their deeds, heirs to their deeds,
that kamma is the womb from which they are born, that their deeds are their
relatives. To them their deeds come home again and whatsoever deeds they
do, be they good or evil, of those deeds they receive the results.
Everybody is the owner of his deeds, he possesses the kamma he has
performed. People cannot exchange their kammas. Other kinds of possessions
do not really belong to us, they can be destroyed or stolen. The kamma we
have performed ourselves, be it kusala kamma or akusala kamma, cannot be
stolen or damaged by fire, wind or sun. There is no possession which can be
kept as safely as kamma, because kamma is accumulated from moment to
moment, since cittas arise and fall away in succession.
When kamma has been performed it can cause the arising of vipåka (result)
for the person who committed it, if there are the right conditions for kamma
to produce result. The person who has performed kamma will receive its result
accordingly, since kamma is the “womb”, it can condition rebirth in a happy
plane or in an unhappy plane. When we are born, kamma is a “relative”
(kinsman) to us, we are dependant on our kamma. When there are conditions
for akusala kamma to produce its result, then akusala kamma is our “relative”:
there is the arising of unpleasant experiences and misfortunes, of which the
immediate occasion can even be our circle of relatives and friends, or other
people we are acquainted with. When kusala kamma has the opportunity to
produce its result, the opposite happens, and thus we can say that each person
has kamma as his relative, that he is dependant on his kamma.
When we experience happiness or misery on account of visible object,
sound, odour, flavour and tangible object, it seems that other people are the
cause of such experiences. When we for example have been hurt or harmed by
others, it seems that other people are the cause of this. However, could this
really happen if there were no akusala kamma we performed ourselves which
produces such result? When akusala kamma has the opportunity to produce
result we will receive its result, even if there are no people around who could
hurt us. We may, for example, wound ourselves with a knife, we may fall
down, we may become ill, we may suffer from an inundation or a fire. Some
people may believe that there is another person who could avenge himself and
cause them to suffer from sickness and other misfortunes. They extend merit
to that person out of fear of his retaliation. However, all this is a superstition.
70 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

When we have performed kusala kamma we can extend merit to others who
are able to appreciate our good deed, and this is a form of dåna, of generosity.
It is beneficial to do this, because at such a moment the citta is accompanied
by mettå. We think of the wellbeing of someone else, we give him the
opportunity to have kusala citta with appreciation of our kusala. When
somebody has “anumodana dåna”, appreciation of another person’s kusala, it
is his kusala kamma. We all can rejoice in each others kusala, by anumodana
dåna, and in this way benefit from the good deeds performed by someone
else. However, we should not extend merit out of fear that there is someone
who could avenge himself and cause misfortune. The development of mettå
towards those we meet in this life is more beneficial than the extension of
merit to an avenger we have never seen and whom we do not know.
We read in the Commentary to the Dhammapada (vs. 136) that the Buddha
told the bhikkhus a story of the past, which happened at the time of Buddha
Kassapa. The treasurer Sumangala had a Vihåra built for the Buddha Kassapa.
One day when Sumangala was on his way to the Teacher, he saw a robber,
hidden in a rest house at the gate of the city, his feet spattered with mud, a
robe drawn over his head. Sumangala said to himself: “This man must be a
night-prowler in hiding.” Then that robber conceived a grudge against
Sumangala. He burned his field seven times, cut off the feet of his cattle seven
times and burned his house seven times. However, he had not satisfied his
grudge yet against the treasurer. When he found out that Sumangala rejoiced
most of all in the Buddha’s Perfumed Chamber, he destroyed that by fire.
When Sumangala saw the Perfumed Chamber destroyed by fire he did not
have the slightest grief but he clapped his hands with joy since he would be
once more permitted to built a Perfumed Chamber for the Buddha. He rebuilt
the Perfumed Chamber and presented it to the Buddha and his retinue of
twenty thousand monks. When the robber saw that, he decided to kill
Sumangala. He took a knife and went around the monastery for seven days.
During these days Sumangala made gifts to the Sangha presided over by the
Buddha. He told the Buddha what had happened and said that he would
transfer to that man the first fruits of the merit of his offering. When the
robber heard this he realized that he had committed a grievous sin towards
the treasurer who had no ill-will and even extended merit to him. He asked
the treasurer forgiveness. When the treasurer asked the robber about each
particular deed whether he had committed it, the robber answered him that
he had committed all of them, and he explained the reason. He said that he
had conceived a grudge against the treasurer when he had heard his words
while he was lying down splattered with mud near the city gate. Sumangala
asked him forgiveness for the words he had spoken then. The robber wanted
to become the treasurer’s slave and live in his house, but Sumangala declined
that, since he could not be sure whether the robber would continue to have a
Mettå: the foundation of the world ● 71

grudge against him. Although Sumangala had forgiven the robber, the akusala
kamma the robber had committed caused him to be reborn in the Avíci Hell.
After he had suffered there for a long time he was reborn as a peta (ghost) on
Vultures Peak in the era of this Buddha.
The treasurer had no feelings of revenge against the robber who had a
grudge against him, but he had mettå towards him. He extended merit to the
robber who had committed very heavy akusala kamma so that he would have
kusala citta while rejoicing in Sumangala’s good deeds. If Sumangala had been
angry with the robber and had feelings of revenge, he himself could have
received the result of his anger and of the deeds motivated by revenge.
If one is afraid of revenge one should abstain from the five kinds of akusala
kamma which cause a fivefold guilty dread, namely: killing, stealing, sexual
misconduct, lying and the taking of intoxicants. One should abstain from these
akusala kammas. The Buddha said that people who only fear those things
which should be feared are no fools, whereas people who only fear what
should not be feared are fools. Those who put the Dhamma into practice
should fear the committing of akusala kamma, they should not be afraid of a
person who could take revenge and control their destiny.
Someone asked whether one, if one develops samådhi (concentration),
could see an image of the person who wants to take revenge. There are
misunderstandings about the development of samådhi, and therefore I will
explain what it is. There are two kinds of samådhi, namely sammå-samådhi,
right concentration, and micchå-samådhi, wrong concentration. There is
sammå-samådhi with the development of samatha, tranquil meditation. This is
the development of kusala citta which is established in wholesome calm so
that there is more and more freedom from lobha, attachment, dosa, aversion,
and moha, ignorance. Thus in samatha there must be kusala citta with sati
sampajañña, paññå arising with sati, which is mindful time and again of the
dhammas (realities) which condition the citta to be free from akusala and to
attain true calm. Calm can be developed with meditation subjects such as the
excellent qualities of the Buddha, the Dhamma and the Sangha. Or one can
think of other people with mettå, karuùå (compassion), muditå (sympathetic
joy) and upekkhå (equanimity). One can recollect dåna (generosity) and síla
(good moral conduct) one has performed, or one can recollect death. When
the citta has advanced in kusala it becomes more established in calm, in
freedom from akusala. Then the characteristic of calm which goes together
with concentration, samådhi, appears more clearly. Calm can become firmer
when sati sampajañña performs its function, and this has nothing to do with
the seeing of extraordinary things or strange experiences.
When calm has been developed with a meditation subject and calm has
become more established, one can experience an image, nimitta, but this is
not the case with all meditation subjects. The development of the following
72 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

meditation subjects is dependant on the experience of a nimitta: the kasiùas


(disks), the meditations on corpses, mindfulness of breath (ånåpåna sati) and
mindfulness with regard to the body (kåyagatå sati).
When someone develops the earth kasiùa he contemplates earth in order
that the citta becomes calm, free of akusala; he is dependant on an image in
the form of a circle, which can help him to subdue akusala citta. When
someone develops the other kasiùas, namely the kasiùas of fire and wind, of
the colours of blue, yellow, red and white, of light and air, the same procedure
is followed.
The meditations on foulness (asubha) are meditations on corpses in
different stages of decay.
As regards mindfulness of breath (ånåpåna sati), this is mindfulness of
breath where it appears on the tip of the nose or upper lip.
Kåyagatå sati is contemplation of the foulness of the body in each part, such
as hair of the head, hair of the body, nails, teeth, skin.
One is dependant on a “nimitta”, a mental image, only when one develops
calm with the above mentioned meditation subjects. Of each of these subjects
a mental image can appear. Citta contemplates this image in order to attain a
higher degree of calm. Citta contemplates a specific nimitta in the case of each
of these subjects and it does not “see” other nimittas such as hells, heavens,
devas, ghosts or the person one calls the avenger or controller of one’s fate.
The development of samatha and the development of vipassanå are intricate
and difficult. For both ways of development paññå is needed but paññå in
samatha and paññå in vipassanå are of different levels. Paññå in samatha can
temporarily subdue defilements but it cannot eradicate them. In vipassanå
paññå is developed which knows the reality which appears as it is, as anattå,
non-self, and this kind of paññå can eradicate defilements completely. People
should not mistakenly think that they develop samatha or vipassanå by way of
concentration, by trying to focus for a long time on one object.
If someone tries to concentrate with the expectation to see special things he
concentrates with lobha. This is not the development of true calm which is
freedom from lobha, dosa and moha. He does not develop calm, because there
is lobha, not paññå. There is no sati sampajañña which knows how citta can
become calm, free from defilements. Sati sampajañña knows correctly how
citta should contemplate a particular meditation subject in order to attain true
calm. When there is no right understanding of the development of calm and
one concentrates in order to have special experiences or to see extraordinary
things, there is no sammå-samådhi, right concentration, but micchå-samådhi,
wrong concentration. When there is micchå-samådhi, the citta is akusala,
there is citta with attachment. There is clinging, one wants to concentrate, to
focus for a long time on one object. When there is micchå-samådhi different
mental images may appear because citta thinks of them without realizing that
Mettå: the foundation of the world ● 73

there is only thinking. It is the same situation as when people are dreaming,
and they do not realize that the images in their dream appear only because
they are thinking of them. When there is micchå-samådhi and someone sees
an image he takes for the controller of his fate or an avenger, it is only a
thought, an imagination, it is not right understanding which clearly realizes
what is true. The Buddha said that in the cycle of birth and death which is
endlessly long we all were related to each other as family members, friends,
husband and wife, parents and children, or as enemies. Even Devadatta who
tried to kill the Buddha was in a former life his father. People should not
extend merit to a person who could revenge himself because of a bad deed
they did towards him, to a person they do not even know, since people cannot
remember which bad deeds they committed to one another. Instead, we
should from now on develop mettå towards each being, each person we meet
in this life, in order to subdue the inclination to commit evil deeds. When
people lack mettå there will be suffering. The Buddha said that mettå is the
dhamma which is the foundation of the world, it is kusala dhamma which
supports beings in the world so that they can live free from danger, free from
the sorrow resulting from akusala citta which is without mettå.
74 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism
● 75

Selected Texts
Mettå Sutta: Sutta-Nipåta (143-152)

This is what is to be done by one who is skilful in respect of the good, having
attained the peaceful state. He should be capable, straight, and very upright,
easy to speak to gentle and not proud, contented and easy to support, having
few duties and of a frugal way of life, with his sense-faculties calmed, zealous,
not impudent, (and) not greedy (when begging) among families.
And he should not do any mean thing, on account of which other wise men
would criticize him. Let all creatures indeed be happy (and) secure; let them
be happy minded.
Whatever living creatures there are, moving or still without exception,
whichever are long or large, or middle-sized or short, small or great,
whichever are seen or unseen, whichever live far or near, whether they
already exist or are going to be, let all creatures be happy minded.
One man should not humiliate another; one should not despise anyone
anywhere. One should not wish another misery because of anger or from the
notion of repugnance.
Just as a mother would protect with her life her own son, her only son, so
one should cultivate an unbounded mind towards all beings, and loving-
kindness towards all the world. One should cultivate an unbounded mind,
above and below and across, without obstruction, without enmity, without
rivalry.
Standing, or going, or seated, or lying down, as long as one is free from
drowsiness, one should practise this mindfulness. This, they say, is the holy
state here.
Not subscribing to wrong views, virtuous, endowed with insight, having
overcome greed for sensual pleasures, a creature assuredly does not come to
lie again in a womb.
76 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

Sigålovåda Suttanta: Dígha Nikåya, III, 180

Thus have I heard—The Exalted One was once staying near Råjagaha in the
Bamboo Wood at the Squirrels’ Feeding ground.
Now at this time young Sigåla, a householder’s son, rising betimes, went
forth from Råjagaha, and with wet hair and wet garments and clasped hands
uplifted, paid worship to the several quarters of the earth and sky—to the
east, south, west, and north, to the nadir and the zenith.
And the Exalted One, early that morning dressed himself, took bowl and
robe and entered Råjagaha seeking alms. Now he saw young Sigåla
worshipping and spoke to him thus—
Why, young householder, do you, rising betimes and leaving Råjagaha, with
wet hair and raiment, worship the several quarters of earth and sky?
Sir, my father, when he was at dying, said to me: Dear son, you should
worship the quarters of the earth and sky. So I, sir, honouring my father’s
word, reverencing, revering, holding it sacred, rise betimes and, leaving
Råjagaha, worship on this wise.
But in the religion of an Ariyan, young householder, the six quarters should
not be worshipped thus.
How then, sir, in the religion of an Ariyan, should the six quarters be
worshipped?
It would be an excellent thing, sir, if the Exalted One would so teach me the
doctrine according to which, in the religion of an Ariyan, the six quarters
should be worshipped.
Hear then, young householder, give ear to my words and I will speak.
So be it, sir, responded young Sigåla. And the Exalted One said—
Inasmuch, young householder, as the Ariyan disciple has put away the four
vices in conduct, inasmuch as he does no evil actions from the four motives,
inasmuch as he does not pursue the six channels for dissipating wealth, he
thus, avoiding these fourteen evil things, is a coverer of the six quarters; he
has practised so as to conquer both worlds; he tastes success both in this world
and the next. At the dissolution of the body, after death he is reborn to a
happy destiny heaven. What are the four vices of conduct that he has put
away? The destruction of life, the taking what is not given, licentiousness, and
lying speech. These are the four vices of conduct that he has put away.
Thus spake the Exalted One. And when the blessed One had thus spoken,
the master spake again—

Slaughter of life, theft, lying, adultery—


To these no word of praise the wise award.
Selected Texts ● 77

By which four motives does he do no evil deed? Evil deeds are done from
motives of partiality, enmity, stupidity and fear. But inasmuch as the Ariyan
disciple is not led away by these motives, he through them does no evil deed.
Thus spake Exalted One. And when the Blessed One had thus spoken, the
Master spake yet again—

Whoso from partiality or hate


Or fear or dulness doth transgress the Norm,
All minished good name and fame become
As in the abbing month the waning moon.
Who ne’er from partiality or hate
Or fear or dulness doth transgress the Norm,
Perfect and full good name and fame become.
As in the brighter half the waxing moon.

And which are the six channels for dissipating wealth? The being addicted to
intoxicating liquors, frequenting the streets at unseemly hours, haunting fairs,
the being infatuated by gambling, associating with evil companions, the habit
of idleness.
There are, young householder, these six dangers through being addicted to
intoxicating liquors—actual loss of wealth, increase of quarrels, susceptibility
to disease, loss of good character, indecent exposure, impaired intelligence.
Six, young householder, are the perils from frequenting the streets at
unseemly hours—he himself is without guard or protection and so also are
wife and children; so also is his property; he moreover becomes suspected [as
the doer] of [undiscovered] crimes, and false rumours fix on him, and many
are the troubles he goes out to meet.
Six, young householder, are the perils from haunting fairs—[he is ever
thinking] where is there dancing? where is there singing? where is there
music? where is recitation? where are the cymbals? where the tam-tams?
Six young householder, are the perils for him who is infatuated with
gambling: as winner he begets hatred; when beaten he mourns his lost
wealth; his actual substance is wasted; his word has no weight in a court of
law; he is despised by friends and officials; he is not sought after by those who
would give or take in marriage, for they would say that a man who is a
gambler cannot afford to keep a wife.
Six, young householder, are the perils of the habit of idleness—he says, it is
too cold, and does no work. He says, it is too hot and does no work; he says, it
is too early...too late, and does no work. He says, I am too hungry and does no
work...too full, and does no work. And while all that he should do remains
undone, new wealth he does not get, and such wealth as he has dwindles
away.
78 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

Thus spake the Exalted One. And when the Blessed One had thus spoken,
the Master spake again—

Some friends are bottle-comrades; some are they


Who [to your face] dear friend! dear friend! will say.
Who proves a comrade in your hour of need,
Him may ye rightly call a friend indeed.

Sleeping when sun has risen, adultery,


Entanglement in strife, and doing harm,
Friendship with wicked men, hardness of heart
These causes six to ruin bring a man.
Is he of evil men comrade and friend,
Doth he in evil ways order his life,
Both from this world and from the world to come
To woeful ruin such a man doth fall.

Dicing and women, drink, the dance and song,


Sleeping by day, prowling around at night,
Friendship with wicked men, hardness of heart—
These causes six to ruin bring a man.

Playing with dice, drinking strong drink, he goes


To women dear as life to other men,
Following the baser, not th’enlightened minds,
He wanes as in the darker half the moon.

The tippler of strong drink, poor destitute,


Athirst while drinking, haunter of the bar,
As stone in water so he sinks in debt;
Swift will he make his folk without a name.

One who by habit in the day doth sleep,


Who looks upon the night as time to arise,
One who is ever wanton, filled with wine,
He is not fit to lead a household life.

Too cold! too hot! too late! such is the cry.


And so past men who shake off work that waits
The opportunities for good pass by...
But he who reckons cold and heat as less
Than straws, doing his duties as a man,
He nowise falls away from happiness.
Selected Texts ● 79

Four, O young householder, are they who should be reckoned as foes in the
likeness of friends; to wit, a rapacious, person the man of words not deeds, the
flatterer, the fellow-waster.
Of these the first is on four grounds to be reckoned as a foe in the likeness
of a friend—he is rapacious; he gives little and asks much; he does his duty
out of fear; he pursues his own interests.
On four grounds the man of words, not deeds, is to be reckoned as a foe in
the likeness of a friend—he makes friendly profession in the likeness of a
friend—he makes friendly profession as regards the past; he makes friendly
profession as regards the future; he tries to gain your favour by empty sayings;
when the opportunity for service has arisen he avows his disability.
On four grounds the flatterer is to be reckoned as a foe in the likeness of a
friend—he both consents to do wrong, and dissents from doing right; he
praises you to your face; he speaks ill of you to others.
On four grounds the fellow-waster companion is to be reckoned as a foe in
the likeness of a friend—he is your companion when you indulge in strong
drink; he is your companion when you frequent the streets at untimely hours;
he is your companion when you haunt shows and fairs; he is your companion
when you are infatuated with gambling.
Thus spake the Exalted One. And when the Blessed One had thus spoken,
the Master spake yet again—

The friend who’s ever seeking what to take,


The friend whose words are other than his deeds,
The friend who flatters, pleasing you withal.
The boon companion down the current ways—
These four are foes. Thus having recognized,
Let the wise man avoid them from afar
As they were path of peril and of dread.

Four, O young householder, are the friends who should be reckoned as sound
at heart—the helper; the friend who is the same in happiness and adversity;
the friend of good council; the friend who sympathizes.
On four grounds the friend who is a helper is to be reckoned as sound at
heart—he guards you when you are off your guard, he guards your property
when you are off your guard; he is a refuge to you when you are afraid; when
you have tasks to perform he provides a double supply [of what you may
need].
On four grounds the friend who is the same in happiness and adversity is to
be reckoned as sound of heart—he tells you his secrets; he keeps secret your
secrets; in your troubles he does not forsake you; he lays down even his life
80 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

for your sake.


On four grounds the friend who declares what you need to do is...sound at
heart—he restrains you from doing wrong; he enjoins you to [do what is]
right; he informs you of what you had not heard before; he reveals to you the
way to heaven.
On four grounds the friend who sympathizes is to be reckoned as sound at
heart—he does not rejoice over your misfortunes; he rejoices over your
prosperity; he restrains anyone who is speaking ill of you; he commends
anyone who is praising you.
Thus spake the Exalted One. And when the Blessed One had thus spoken,
the Master spake yet again—

The friend who is a helpmate, and the friend


Of bright days and of dark, and he who shows
What’t is you need, and he who throbs for you
With sympathy—these four the wise should know
As friends, and should devote himself to them
As mother to her own, her bosom’s child.
Whoso is virtuous and intelligent,
Shines like a fire that blazes [on the hill].
To him amassing wealth, like roving bee
Its honey gathering [and hurting naught],
Riches mount up as ant-heap growing high.
When the good layman wealth has so amassed
Able is he to benefit his clan.
In portions four let him divide that wealth.
So binds he to himself life’s friendly things.
One portion let him spend and taste the fruit.
His business to conduct let him take two.
And portion four let him reserve and hoard;
So there’ll be wherewithal in times of need.

And how, O young householder, does the Ariyan disciple protect the six
quarters? The following should be looked upon as the six quarters—parents as
the east, teachers as the south, wife and children as the west, friends and
companions as the north, servants and work people as the nadir, religious
teachers and brahmins as the zenith.
In five ways a child should minister to his parents as the eastern quarter—
Once supported by them I will now be their support; I will perform duties
incumbent on them; I will keep up the lineage and tradition of my family; I
will make myself worthy of my heritage.
In five ways parents thus ministered to, as the eastern quarter, by their
Selected Texts ● 81

child, show their love for him—they restrain him from vice, they exhort him to
virtue, they train him to a profession, they contract a suitable marriage for
him, and in due time they hand over his inheritance.
Thus is this eastern quarter protected by him and made safe and secure.
In five ways should pupils minister to their teachers as the southern quarter:
by rising (from their seat, in salutation) by waiting upon them, by eagerness
to learn, by personal service, and by attention when receiving their teaching.
And in five ways do teachers, thus ministered to as the southern quarter by
their pupils, love their pupil—they train him in that wherein he has been well
trained; they make him hold fast that which is well held; they thoroughly
instruct him in the lore of every art; they speak well of him among his friends
and companions. They provide for his safety in every quarter.
Thus is this quarter protected by him and made safe and secure.
In five ways should a wife as western quarter be ministered to by her
husband—by respect, by courtesy, by faithfulness, by handing over authority
to her, by providing her with adornment.
In these five ways does the wife, ministered to by her husband as the
western quarter, love him—her duties are well performed, by hospitality to
the kin of both, by faithfulness, by watching over the goods he brings, and by
skill and industry in discharging all her business.
Thus is this western quarter protected by him and made safe and secure.

In five ways should a clansman minister to his friends and familiars as the
northern quarter—by generosity, courtesy and benevolence, by treating them
as he treats himself, and by being as good as his word.
In these five ways thus ministered to as the northern quarter, his friends and
familiars love him—they protect him when he is off his guard, and on such
occasions guard his property; they become a refuge in danger, they do not
forsake him in his troubles, and they show consideration for his family.
Thus is the northern quarter by him protected and made safe and secure.
In five ways does an Ariyan master minister to his servants and employees
as the nadir—by assigning them work according to their strength; by
supplying them with food and wages; by tending them in sickness; by sharing
with them unusual delicacies; by granting leave at times.
In these ways ministered to by their master, servants and employees love
their master in five ways—they rise before him, they lie down to rest after
him; they are content with what is given to them; they do their work well; and
they carry about his praise and good fame.
Thus is the nadir by him protected and made safe and secure.
In five ways should the clansman minister to recluses and brahmins as the
zenith—by affection in act speech and mind; by keeping open house to them,
by supplying their temporal needs.
82 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

Thus ministered to as the zenith, recluses and brahmins show their love for
the clansman in six ways—they restrain him from evil, they exhort him to
good, they love him with kindly thoughts; they teach him what he had not
heard, they correct and purify what he has heard, they reveal to him the way
to heaven.
Thus by him is the zenith protected and made safe and secure.
Thus spake the Exalted One. And when the Blessed One had so spoken, the
Master said yet further—

Mother and father are the Eastern view,


And teachers are the quarters of the South.
And wife and children are the Western view,
And friends and kin the quarter to the North;
Servants and working folk the nadir are,
And overhead the brahmin and recluse.
These quarters should be worshipped by the man
Who fitly ranks as houseman in his clan

He that is wise, expert in virtue’s ways,


Gentle and in this worship eloquent,
Humble and docile, he may honour win.
Active in rising, foe to laziness,
Unshaken in adversities, his life
Flawless, sagacious, he may honour win.
If he have winning ways, and maketh friends,
Makes welcome with kind words and generous heart,
And can give sage councils and advice,
And guide his fellows, he may honour win.

The giving hand, the kindly speech, the life


Of service, impartiality to one
As to another, as the case demands—
These be the things that make the world go round
As linchpin serves the rolling of the car.
And if these things be not, no mother reaps
The honour and respect her child should pay,
Nor doth the father win them through the child.
And since the wise rightly appraise these things,
They win to eminence and earn men’s praise.

When the Exalted One had thus spoken, Sigåla the young householder said
this—Beautiful, lord, beautiful! As if one should set up again that which had
Selected Texts ● 83

been overthrown, or reveal that which had been hidden, or should disclose the
road to one that was astray, or should carry a lamp into darkness, saying They
that have eyes will see! Even so hath the Truth been manifested by the Exalted
One in many ways. And I, even I, do go to him as my refuge, and to the Truth
and to the Order. May the Exalted One receive me as his lay-disciple, as one
has taken his refuge in him from this day forth as long as life endures.
84 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

Udåna: (VIII, viii)

Thus have I heard: On a certain occasion the Exalted One was staying near
Såvatthí in East Park, at the storeyed house of Migåra’s mother.
Now at that time the dear and lovely grand-daughter of Visåkhå, Migåra’s
mother, had died. So Visåkhå, Migåra’s mother, with clothes and hair still wet
(from washing) came at an unseasonable hour to see the Exalted One, and on
coming to him, saluted him and sat down at one side. As she sat thus the
Exalted One said this to Visåkhå, Migåra’s mother:
‘Why, Visåkhå! How is it that you come here with clothes and hair still wet
at an unseasonable hour?’
‘O, sir, my dear and lovely grand-daughter is dead! That is why I come here
with hair and clothes still wet at an unseasonable hour.’
‘Visåkhå, would you like to have as many sons and grandsons as there are
men in Såvatthí?’
‘Yes, sir, I would indeed!’
‘But how many men do you suppose die daily in Såvatthí?’
‘Ten, sir, or maybe nine, or eight. Maybe seven, six, five or four, three, two;
maybe one a day dies in Såvatthí, sir. Såvatthí is never free from men dying,
sir.’
‘What think you, Visåkhå? In such case would you ever be without wet hair
and clothes?’
‘Surely not, sir! Enough for me, sir, of so many sons and grandsons!’
‘ Visåkhå, whoso have a hundred things beloved, they have a hundred
sorrows. Whoso have ninety, eighty ... thirty, twenty things beloved ... whoso
have ten ... whoso have but one thing beloved, have but one sorrow.
Sorrowless are they and passionless. Serene are they, I declare.’

All griefs or lamentations whatso’er


And divers forms of sorrow in the world,
Because of what is dear do these become.
Thing dear not being, these do not become.
Happy are they therefore and free from grief
To whom is naught at all dear in the world.
Wherefore aspiring for the griefless, sorrowless,
Make thou in all the world naught dear to thee.
Selected Texts ● 85

Itivuttaka: (III, IV,vii)

‘ Monks, these three unprofitable ways of thinking cause blindness, loss of


sight, ignorance, put an end to insight, are associated with trouble and
conduce not to nibbåna. What three ways of thinking?
Thinking about lust ... about ill-will ... about harming ... causes blindness,
loss of sight ... conduces not to nibbåna. These are the three.’
‘ Monks, these three profitable ways of thinking cause not blindness, but
cause sight, knowledge, increase insight, are on the side of freedom from
trouble and conduce to nibbåna. What three?
Thinking about renunciation ... goodwill ... harmlessness conduce to
nibbåna. These three profitable ways of thinking ... conduce to nibbåna.’

Three profitable ways of thought should one pursue,


And three unprofitable ways should put away,
He surely doth control a train of thought sustained,
As a rain-shower lays accumulated dust,
He surely with a mind that lays its thought to rest,
In this same life (on earth) hath reached the place of peace.
86 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism
● 87

Glossary
adosa non aversion
ahosi kamma kamma which is ineffectual
akusala unwholesome, unskilful
akusala kamma a bad deed
akusala citta unwholesome consciousness
anågåmí person who has reached the third stage of enlightenment, he has
no aversion (dosa)
ånåpåna sati mindfulness on breath
anattå not self
anicca saññå perception of impermanence
anumodana thanksgiving, appreciation of someone else’s kusala
appanå-samådhi attainment-concentration
arahat noble person who has attained the fourth and last stage of
enlightenment
ariyan noble person who has attained enlightenment
arúpa-brahma plane plane of existence attained as a result of arúpa-jhåna.
There are no sense impressions, no rúpa experienced in this realm.
asubha meditations on foulness
asura demon
Atthasåliní The Expositor, a commentary to the first book of the
Abhidhamma Piìaka
balas powers, strengths
bhåvanå mental development, comprising the development of calm and the
development of insight
bhikkhu monk
bhikkuní nun
bodhisatta a being destined to become a Buddha
brahma heavenly being born in the Brahmå world, as a result of the
attainment of jhåna
brahmå-vihåras the four divine abidings: loving-kindness, compassion,
sympathetic joy, equanimity
Buddha a person who becomes fully enlightened without the aid of a teacher
Buddhaghosa the greatest of Commentators on the Tipiìaka, author of the
Visuddhimagga in 5 A.D
cetasika mental factor arising with consciousness
cetovimutti “deliverance of heart”
88 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

chanda “wish to do”


citta consciousness, the reality which knows or cognizes an object
dåna generosity, giving
deva heavenly being
dhamma the teachings, the law, reality, truth
Dhammasangaùi the first book of the Abhidhamma Piìaka
diììhi wrong view, distorted view of realities
dosa aversion
dukkha suffering, unsatisfactoriness of conditioned realities
indriya controlling faculty, the five ‘spiritual faculties’ which should be
cultivated, namely: confidence, energy, awareness, concentration and
wisdom.
Jåtakas birth stories about the Buddha’s former lives
jhåna absorption which can be attained through the development of calm
kåyagatå sati mindfulness of the body
kamma intention or volition; deed motivated by volition
kamma patha course of action performed through body, speech or mind
kappa an endlessly long period of time
karuùå compassion
kasiùa disk, used as an object for the development of calm
kåya body. It can also stand for the ‘mental body’, the cetasikas
khandhas physical and mental phenomena of life, classified as five groups
khanti patience
kusala wholesome, skilful
kusala kamma a good deed
kusala citta wholesome consciousness
lobha attachment, greed
mangala auspicious sign or blessing
måra the evil one
mettå loving-kindness
mettå citta consciousness accompanied by loving-kindness
micchå-samådhi wrong concentration
moha ignorance
muditå sympathetic joy
nåma mental phenomena
nibbåna unconditioned reality, the reality which does not arise and fall
away. The destruction of lust, hatred and delusion. The deathless. The end
of suffering.
nimitta counter-image in tranquil meditation
Påli the language of the Buddhist teachings
Glossary ● 89

paññå wisdom
patisanthåro courtesy
peta ghost
rúpa physical phenomena, realities which do not experience anything
rúpa-brahma plane heavenly realm of existence attained as a result of
rúpa-jhåna
sakadågåmí a person who has attained the second stage of enlightenment
and will not be reborn more than once
såkhalyaÿ amity
samatha the development of calm
sammå right
sammå-diììhi right understanding
sammå-samådhi right concentration
sammå-sati right mindfulness
sampajañña discrimination, comprehension
saóvara síla moral restraint
sangha community of monks and nuns. As one of the Triple Gems it means
the community of those people who have attained enlightenment.
saññå memory, remembrance
saòkhårakkhandha all cetasikas (mental factors) except feeling and
memory
Såriputta chief disciple of Buddha
sati awareness, non-forgetfulness, awareness of reality by direct experience
sati-sampajañña clear comprehension
satipaììhåna development of direct understanding of realities, or, the
applications of mindfulness: body, feeling etc-which are the objects of right
understanding
síla morality, virtue
sobhana beautiful
sotåpanna person who has attained the first stage of enlightenment, and
who has eradicated wrong view of realities
sutta part of the scriptures containing dialogues at different places on
different occasions
Theravåda Buddhism ‘Doctrine of the Elders’, the oldest tradition of
Buddhism
Tipiìaka the teachings of the Buddha, consisting of three parts: Vinaya,
Suttanta, Abhidhamma
upekkhå indifferent feeling
viññåùakkhandha all cittas (consciousness)
vipåka result (of kamma) e.g. rebirth and during life, the experience of
pleasant and unpleasant objects through the senses, such as seeing, hearing,
90 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

etc.
vipassanå the development of insight
Visuddhimagga an encyclopaedia of the Buddha’s teaching, written by
Buddhaghosa in the fifth century A.D
yakkha non-human being
● 91

Other Publications
The Buddha’s Path By Nina van Gorkom
Explains the basic principles of Buddhism to those who have no previous
experience and knowledge of this way of life. The four noble Truths - suffering
- the origin of suffering - the cessation of suffering - and the way leading to
the end of suffering - are explained as a philosophy and a practical guidance
which can be followed in today’s world. The contents include: the Buddha’s
life, the truth of suffering, the truth of non-self, the mind, deeds and their
results, good deeds and a wholesome life, meditation and the Eightfold Path.
1994, paperback, 150 pages, 140mm x 210mm, ISBN 1 897633 12 2, price
£7.95.

Abhidhamma in Daily Life By Nina van Gorkom


This unique book takes the reader straight to the higher doctrine of Theravåda
Buddhism - the Abhidhamma. It cuts through the complexities of the original
texts enabling the reader to obtain a clearer grasp of the theory and practice of
the teachings. Many Påli terms are used in order to bring about a precise
understanding of the different realities of our daily life. Suitable for the
serious beginner to Buddhism or for advanced students.
1992, 284pp, paperback, 130mm x 190mm, ISBN 1 897633 01 7, price
£6.95.

Buddhism in Daily Life By Nina van Gorkom


A general introduction to the main ideas of Theravåda Buddhism. With its
many quotes from the Påli texts, it shows the practical application of the
teachings to daily life. The Eightfold Path, the Four Noble Truths, the
development of calm and the development of insight are all discussed.
Suitable for beginners and experts alike. 1992, 175pp, paperback, 130mm x
190mm, ISBN 1 897633 02 5, price £5.95

The World in the Buddhist Sense By Nina van Gorkom


Explains the realities in and around ourselves. Analyses the difference
between the development of calm and the development of insight. Discusses
92 ● Mettå: Loving-kindness in Buddhism

the meditation practice of “mindfulness of breathing”. Illustrates with many


quotes from the Påli Tipiìaka. Suitable for those who have a background of
Buddhism but who seek a deeper understanding. October 1993, 123 pp,
paperback, 210mm x 140mm. ISBN 1 897633 11 4, price £7.95.

Cetasikas—under preparation, to be published January 1996.

You might also like