Oaths and Vows - The Power of Words: A D'var Torah On Parashat Matot (By Alan I. Friedman

Oaths and Vows — The Power of Words
A D’var Torah on Parashat Matot (Num. 30:2 – 32:42)

By Alan I. Friedman
“Vay’dabeir Moshe el-rashei ha-matot liv’nei Yisrael….”
“Moses spoke to the heads of the Israelite tribes….”
The discussion of oaths and vows in Parashat Matot focuses almost

exclusively on the rights of a father or husband to annul or uphold a
woman’s vows. As Reform Jews in the 21st century, we find it difficult to
understand male-dominated societal standards that placed strict limits on a
woman’s exercise of free will and self-determination. We forget that only in
the last 120-or-so years, and only in progressive countries of the Western
world, have women begun to emerge from millennia of inferior social and
legal status. Certainly in the biblical Near East, at the time when the
concepts of Parashat Matot were being codified, men had rights that women
did not, and male dominance of human affairs was pervasive.
But we will not dwell on these aspects of Matot. Rather, we will examine the
characteristics of oaths and vows, the distinctions between these two types
of pledges, the rationale for speech adding potency to an oath or vow, and
the mechanism for annulment.
The two Hebrew words that we will focus on are neder (plural nedarim) and
sh’vuah1 (plural sh’vuot). Although there is no English equivalent for neder;
it is commonly translated as “vow,” meaning a pledge to do something; but
“vow” doesn’t convey the full meaning. There are two types of nederim: the
first type empowers a person to prohibit to himself or herself something that
the Torah permits (for example, “I will not eat meat for the next 30 days”);
the second type of neder obligates a person to perform an optional
commandment (such as donating to a particular charity of visiting a sick
friend daily). With the exception of a neder to perform a commandment,
nedarim cannot be used to obligate oneself to perform an act. Parashat
Matot concerns itself only with the first type of neder, a voluntarily adopted
prohibition.2
The second Hebrew word that is key to this passage is sh’vuah, meaning an
“oath.” By invoking a sh’vuah, a person may either prohibit himself from
performing an act, or require himself to perform an act.
“Conceptually there is a great difference between a neder and [a sh’vuah]. A
neder changes the status of an object: for example, if I have made an apple
Do not confuse: h[bX (sh’vuah) = oath; [wbX (shavua) = week

1
2
The Chumash: The Stone Edition; Edited by Rabbis Nosson Scherman and Meir Zlotowitz; Mesorah
Publications, Ltd.; 1993; p. 900.
forbidden to myself, the apple has the status of a forbidden food to me, and
therefore I may not enjoy the apple. In contrast, [a sh’vuah] places an
obligation only on the person: for example, if I have sworn to eat an apple,
there is a new obligation on me, but the halachic status of the apple itself is
unchanged.”3
Whenever a person makes a neder or a sh’vuah, the Torah obligates that

person to fulfill the pledge4. Jewish law further dictates that even if a person
simply expresses a willingness to perform a mitzvah, he or she is similarly
obligated to do so.5
What are the mechanics by which a vow takes effect? “Life and death are in
the power of the tongue,” advises Proverbs 18:21. Speech is the gateway
between the thoughts of the mind and the physical actions of the body.
Through speech one begins the trek of turning intentions into the reality of
action. It is for this reason that making a neder is so effective in binding a
person into doing the right thing.6
Why should a neder help a person perform a mitzvah that he or she is

already obligated to perform? Why can’t a person simply decide to do the
mitzvah and carry it out without expressing the intent verbally? Even
pledging to perform a mitzvah to which one is already obligated strengthens
one’s commitment by moving the intention toward reality. All that remains
is the purely physical act.7
Why does a person become any more obligated by expressing a desire

through the medium of speech than by thinking that same desire? A person
who invokes a neder or a sh’vuah places upon himself, upon others, or upon
objects a status equal to a commandment from the Torah. The neder or
sh’vuah creates a binding situation that otherwise would not have existed.8
The expression of a “word” imposes an obligating force upon the person
making the pledge; and as soon as the word is uttered, the promise is
considered binding.9 “Giving one’s word,” then, is not so much a point of
honor as it is a sacred and binding obligation.10 And, because a pledge is
sacred, it must not be broken. Failure to comply with the pledge makes the
3 Ibid., p. 900.
4 “If a man makes a vow to Adonai or takes an oath imposing an obligation on himself, he shall not
break his pledge; he must carry out all that has crossed his lips.” – Num. 30:3
5 Shulchan Aruch Yoreh De’ah 203.
6 “Speech Impediments,” by Ranon Cortell; Torah from Dixie; undated.
7 Ibid.
8 “How to Vow Your Audience,” Perceptions on the Parasha, by Rabbi Pinchas Winston; Project
Genesis; 2003.
9 “Holy Words,” by Rabbi Jordan D. Cohen; Associate Director of KOLEL – The Adult Centre for Liberal
Jewish Learning; undated.

10 Commentary by Rabbi Gerson D. Cohen, Chancellor Emeritus and Professor of Jewish History,
Jewish Theological Seminary of America; 1999.

person culpable for punishment, just as if he or she had violated an act or
restriction that had been commanded by the Torah. Such is the power of
speech.11
Nedarim and sh’vuot are serious because they are pledges to God. The Torah
does not even consider that one would make a pledge to God and then
default on it. In fact, there are no provisions for absolving a person of the
consequences for defaulting on a pledge.12 Perhaps that is why we read in
Ecclesiastes 5:4 that “it is better not to vow at all than to vow and not fulfill.”
In the Holiness Code, which we recite every Shabbat morning, we read, “You
shall not swear falsely by My Name, thereby desecrating the name of your
God.”13 The Hebrew verb for “desecrate” is chillul. The adjectival form,
chullin, is usually translated as “profane,” but actually has the sense of
“ordinary.” Since the Torah uses chillul regarding the breaking of one’s vow,
and since desecration has relevance only to the defilement of something that
is sacred, we may conclude that one’s speech is sacred.14 We see, then, that
breaking a pledge – that is, desecrating one’s word – is not just a personal
failure; it is a chillul ha-Shem, a profanation of God’s holy Name.15
Recognizing that nedarim and sh’vuot were often made on impulse or in

anger, and without due regard for the consequences,16 some rabbis
performed elaborate legal gymnastics – called hattarat nedarim, – to identify
legal loopholes and provide for the dissolution of vows.17
These legal processes in front of a Beit Din ultimately coalesced into the Kol
Nidrei, which we chant on Erev Yom Kippur. Since any violation of a neder
or sh’vuah can interfere with the atonement process, and since an individual
who has violated a pledge may not realize that he has done so, Kol Nidrei
provides an opportunity for absolution. “Kol Nidrei declares that in case an
individual made a vow or an oath during the past year and somehow forgot
and violated it inadvertently, he now realizes that he made a terrible mistake
and strongly regrets his hasty pronouncement. In effect he tells the ‘court’
… that had he realized the gravity and severity of violating an oath, he never
would have uttered it in the first place. He thus begs for forgiveness and
understanding.”18
11 Rabbi Pinchas Winston; op. cit.

12 Rabbi Jordan D. Cohen, op. cit.
13 Parashat K’doshim, Lev. 19:12.
14 Commentary by Rabbi Yoseph Kalatsky, Dean of The Yad Avraham Institute.
15 “Sanctifying and Profaning the Name,” The Torah – A Modern Commentary; Edited by W. Gunther
Plaut; Union of American Hebrew Congregations; 1981; p. 892.

16 “Speak Out!” by Rabbi Sue Ann Wasserman; Department of Worship, Music, and Religious Living;
Union of American Hebrew Congregations (now Union for Reform Judaism); July 10, 1999.
17 Rabbi Jordan D. Cohen, op. cit.
18 “The Origin and Purpose of Kol Nidrei,” by Rabbi Doniel Neustadt, Congregation Young Israel,
Cleveland, and Principal of Yavne Teachers College; 2000.

Other rabbinic authorities maintain that Kol Nidrei, instead of annulling
existing nedarim and sh’vuot, declares as invalid (“null and void, without
power and without standing”) all future nedarim and sh’vuot that might be
uttered without sufficient forethought.19
What is the message of Parashat Matot for us today? We must be on guard

against making promises, commitments, and pledges that we do not intend
to keep or that we may not be able to keep. Words have power, and giving
one’s word creates a sacred and binding obligation. Let us use our words for
kiddush ha-Shem, sanctification of God’s holy Name.
AIF 07-09-04 Matot – DvarTorah.doc
19 Ibid.

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Oaths and Vows — The Power of Words

A D’var Torah on Parashat Matot (Num. 30:2 – 32:42)

The discussion of oaths and vows in Parashat Matot focuses almost

Do not confuse: h[bX (sh’vuah) = oath; [wbX (shavua) = week

Whenever a person makes a neder or a sh’vuah, the Torah obligates that

Why should a neder help a person perform a mitzvah that he or she is

Why does a person become any more obligated by expressing a desire

Jewish Learning; undated.

Jewish Theological Seminary of America; 1999.

Recognizing that nedarim and sh’vuot were often made on impulse or in

11 Rabbi Pinchas Winston; op. cit.

Plaut; Union of American Hebrew Congregations; 1981; p. 892.

Cleveland, and Principal of Yavne Teachers College; 2000.

What is the message of Parashat Matot for us today? We must be on guard

AIF 07-09-04 Matot – DvarTorah.doc

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