25 Life Hacks

25 Psychological Life Hacks that Will Help You Ga...
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25 Psychological Life Hacks

that Will Help You Gain the
Advantage in Social Situations
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Social situations are among the most important in our lives. Yet, there is a
huge chance that you are oblivious to the plethora of unwritten social
rules that structure everybodys behaviour. Failing to comply to these
cultural imprints can cause irreversible damage. Just following them
blindly will not get you ahead. Hacking them, however, will give you the
best results possible. Therefore we bring to you these 25 psychological
life hacks that will help you gain the advantage in social situations
1) Assume comfort in any interaction.

Our brain is an incredibly complicated instrument. Our relationship with
it, is a love-hate one. We think we have control over it but usually
something unconscious dictates our actions.
In most of our social interactions, we find it difficult to feel comfortable
among strangers because our brain tries to protect us from exposure.
This however isnt helping us when trying to be social and meet new
people, is it?
This is why assuming comfort is so powerful. Commanding your brain to
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feel that you already know(/)the person you are about to meet putsJoin
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position of advantage. It increases the chances of people showing interest
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in you and consequently even liking you.

situations/)
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2) Pay attention to peoples feet when

you are approaching them.
Interrupting people when they are in the middle of an important
conversation is one of the most annoying things to do. It shows that you
have zero knowledge of social dynamics which will lead to unpleasant
social situations.
When you approach a group of people while in a conversation, pay
attention to their bodies. If they turn only their torsos and not their feet,
it means they are in the middle of an important conversation and they
dont want you to interrupt them.
If they turn both torso and feet, it means you are welcome. This is
extremely important, because the right timing in such situations may put
you in a position of advantage, especially if the conversation was boring
for both sides.
3) Whenever you have an argument

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with someone, stand next to them and

not in front of them.
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all beenDiscuss
in situations
where
out(/mission)
of nowhere the conversation
started escalating.
Unless you love drama, I would suggest you to avoid these situations. You
might have the best argument in the world, but usually people get
irritated when they feel they are wrong.
So, whenever you feel that the argument you have with another person
(especially friends its not cool to fight with friends) creates tension,
move next to them. You wont appear much of a threat, and they will
eventually calm down.
4) Whenever you need a favor, open

with I need your help.
Admit it. We all love to get others to do stuff for us. Either because we are
lazy, or because we really need some help to complete a task.
Social dynamics show that when it comes to platonic relationships,
nobody really likes an asshole. So whenever you need a favor, start your
sentence with I need your help.
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In most cases, people will (/)

accept your request and help you out. This
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occurs because we dont really like the guilt of not helping someone out
and we do like to be the one who is capable of helping.

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5) If you want people to feel good, give

them validation. Rephrase what they
just told you.
We love validation. Most of our actions are the outcome of our need for
validation. So what is the best way to get people to like you
(http://www.highexistence.com/real-secret-making-people-like/)? Give
them what they need of course. A simple example, is when you are in a
conversation with another person and he says something really important
for him. After he finishes, rephrase what he just said in your own words.
This will make him think that you are a good listener and that you are
really interested in him. It makes him feel he is the center of attention.
Thats validation right there.
Why Life Hacks Dont Work If You Dont Get Your Shit Together
First (http://www.highexistence.com/wake-up-from-the-matrix/)
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6) If you want to get a positive

response from someone, nod while you
talk.
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This one is extremely powerful and also a bit manipulative especially if

the person is suggestive. So use it with your own responsibility and in an
ethical way. Getting a positive response from someone is usually what we
want. Whether it is making a sale, or promoting a viewpoint, we always
want people to get on board. Nodding while you try to deliver your
message is a powerful way to get the person to agree with you. People
usually like mimicking, so they will most probably nod back while you talk.
This will subsequently communicate to their brains that they have to
agree with you.
7) Want to see if someone is paying

attention to what you are saying? Fold
your arms.
Usually when we are in the middle of a conversation and especially if we
talk about something very important to us, we get lost in our talking and
rarely pay attention to whether the other person is following or not. So
instead of losing time talking to a person who is distracted and might not
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even be interested in what(/)you are saying, do this. Fold your armsJoin

while
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talking and see if the other person follows your move. If the other person
is observing you and pays attention, they will most likely mimic you.
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8) Having trouble remembering

names? Repeat the other persons
name during the conversation.
I suck at remembering names. I usually dont even listen to the other
person when he says his name the moment we get introduced to each
other. So usually, I ask a friend to introduce himself to the person so I can
listen to his name. But then I forget it again. Awkward. Remembering
names is very important because we feel important when someone
mentions us. So the moment you meet someone repeat his name.
Example: Hi my name is Alex Nice to meet you Alex. So, Alex how do
you know John? And continue to repeat his name throughout the
conversation.
9) If you ask someone a question and

they only partially answer, just wait.
They will keep talking.
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This is a very common situation

when you dont know the other person
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that well or your question wasnt clear enough. If they finish the answer
without providing a full answer, just wait. Stay silent and keep eye
contact.
If the tension becomes unbearable, raise your eyebrows. It puts a
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bit of pressure on them but it communicates that you show interest. It
also sub-communicates that you are a person that usually gets what he
wants.
10) People usually focus on the

emotion and not on the subject.
This is very useful in public speaking but also in building rapport with an
acquaintance. Whenever you introduce yourself to new people, most
probably they have already heard what you are about to say. Well thats
not a problem. Even if you want to talk about the most boring topic in the
world, make sure of one thing: Always try to evoke emotions. From my
experience the 3 emotions that you want to evoke are: Excitement
Laughter: Everyone likes to laugh Intrigue: Leave a little mystery so the
other person has to invest energy to hear more. Dont be purposely
distant, but avoid verbal diarrhea.
There are many techniques to turn a boring conversation into an
exciting and intriguing one, but here are a couple of my favorites:
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Pause:
(/) A lot of the time when we want to keep
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someones attention, we tend to talk really fast, but
this subcommunicates neediness and nervousness.
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A well-placed pause can create tension that makes
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your words have more gravitas.

Tone and Inflection: No one finds monotone
exciting. Switch up your tone of voice from deep

for declarative statements, to high inflection when
you want to leave them guessing.
Paint pictures and compose symphonies in their
mind with sensory details: When telling a story,
take the person youre talking to on an emotional
journey by describing the colors, sounds, textures,
tastes, smells, and how they made you feel. This
will cause their mirror-neurons to fire off, making
it easier for them to imagine actually being there
with you.
So if you want to be memorable, focus on the emotion behind the words.
People may forget what you say, but they will never forget how you make
them feel.
READ: 8 Ways to be UBER Charismatic

(http://www.highexistence.com/8-ways-to-be-uber-charismatic/)
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11) Condence is more important than

knowledge.
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Two young candidates walked into the interview office to apply for the
same job. The first one had a Phd, two Masters and a Bachelors degree.
The second one had just a Bachelor. The first one was kind of shy, didnt
talk much, his body language was turned inward. The second one had an
upright posture, was looking the interviewers directly in the eyes, showed
a lot of interest in the job and his answers where emitting confidence. We
dont have to tell you who got the job.
12) Fake it until you make it.

No one became an expert on anything over night. However, the learning
process in everything you do is accelerated by commanding your brain to
think what you want it to think. In simple words. You are what you believe
you are. You are confident if you believe you are confident You are
attractive if you believe you are attractive You are extrovert if you
believe you are extrovert If you want to look deeper into this idea look up
two words. Neuroplasticity (http://www.highexistence.com/its-allin-your-head-how-to-take-advantage-of-neuroplasticity/) and brain
rewiring (http://www.highexistence.com/how-porn-rewires-the-brainis-porn-bad-for-you/).
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13) Pose in a Power Stance.
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This is similar to the previous point, but more concrete than a mantra or
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belief. Go stand in the mirror, put your hands on your hips, thrust your
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pelvic forward, pull your shoulders up, back and down, open your chest,
tilt your head up, and force the biggest smile you can possibly manage to
fit across your face. Even if you consciously know youre just faking it,
your brain cant tell the difference, and will release endorphins to match
your body position. This can feel silly, but it really works
(http://www.ted.com/talks
/amy_cuddy_your_body_language_shapes_who_you_are?language=en).
14) If you want to be persuasive, try

and reduce the use of the words I
think and I believe.
I dont really feel the need to elaborate on this one. Obviously these words
do not evoke confidence and the other person will most probably not
take you seriously. Change them to I know and I will instead.
15) A clean and organised environment

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affects your mood, productivity, and

others perception of who you are.
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(/mission) any motivation at all? How
How
have
you wakenAbout
up without
many times have you started working on something without being able to
get focused and inspired? Next time this happens, take a look around you.
Is your environment clean and well-organized? If not, take some minutes
to clean it up and put everything into place. You will feel refreshed and
reborn and productivity will spark immediately. But not only that, you will
come across as caring and punctual, two highly esteemed traits. Why do
think most of the big companies pay so much attention to creating the
best working environment for their employees? They know what makes
them happy and how it affects their productivity.
16) Want to nd out which people are

close to each other within a group and
who is perceived as the leader?
Pay attention to who is looking at each other when everyone in the group
laughs at a joke. People instinctively look at and agree with the person
they feel closest to within the group.
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17) Whenever you call a person you

want to meet, show excitement!
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Always have this in mind. Excitement is contagious. Why do you think the
music video from Pharrell Williams Happy got so many views and so
many people were talking about it?
People love excitement! It is like an escape from their boring lives. Never
forget that.
(You can mirror this and show disappointment if somebody lets you
down, making them painfully aware of their hurtful actions.)
18) Want to build rapport and gain

respect? Match body language.
This is quite a common topic among body language experts and works
well if you want to gain respect from a person that has high value.
Example:
You are in a social situation where a person has higher value among
others within the group. He is the center of attention and he totally
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enjoys it. How do you match

(/) his value? By befriending him!
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(/signin?redirect_to=/25-psychological-life-hacks-help-gain-advantage-socialIfSign
youInwant
his respect and attention the best thing to do when you
approach
him is to match his body language and speaking patterns. If he
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has open body language and he talks with excitement and joy, dont go
there with crossed arms and with an attitude of negating his words.
Approach him with the same amount of excitement and show openness
and interest.
19) When someone insults you, either

ignore him or mock him. Never lose
temper. Always control the frame.
Haters are everywhere. The more you feed them with hate, the stronger
they become. Never lose your temper. This is a great example of how to
deal with a hater. Enjoy!
19) Stand up straight, have warm

hands and always keep eye contact.
Keep a straight posture and walk like a born leader. This
sub-communicates confidence and others will respect you automatically.
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Keep your hands out of your

pockets. If you dont know what toJoin
do (/join)
with
(/)
them, it is better to fold your arms rather than keep them inside your
pockets.
situations/)
Keep your hands warm. If you have a warm hand when you shake
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somebodys hand, you immediately become a more desirable person to
get along with. Secret Tip wash your hands with warm water often to
keep them warm or take cold showers. (http://www.highexistence.com
/the-wim-hof-method-revealed-how-to-consciously-controlyour-immune-system/)
You have heard this a thousand times. Here is the 1001st. never lose
eye contact! Losing eye contact is like losing your confidence. One cool
trick when first meeting someone is to focus on their eye color and smile
at the same time. The eyes are the gateway to the soul, and taking the
extra second to gaze shows you are confident and present. (Be sure to
move your eyes away periodically, a constant stare will creep people out.)
20) The Benjamin Franklin Effect.

The Ben Franklin effect is a psychological finding:
A person who has done someone a favor is more likely to do that person
another favor than they would be if they had received a favor from that
person. Similarly, one who harms another is more willing to harm them
again than the victim is to retaliate.
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This is an unbelievable finding.

In social situations, you can hack this
by
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making someone do something small for you, then asking for your true
favor. Its such a small favor that they will say yes, and due to cognitive
dissonance
situations/) their brain will rationalize that they must like you enough to
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do you a favor in the first place. This is also called the foot-in-the-door
effect.
21) Dont be afraid to touch another

person.
Touching someone on the shoulder or their knees creates an emotional
and physical bond. Especially during moments of joy, laughter and
excitement touching positively reinforces these traits. If youre
uncomfortable with touching, remember 12, fake it until you make it.
22) Use the door-in-the-face hack.

The opposite of foot-in-the-door. Make an unreasonably large request
that will most likely be turned down (but if it isnt then thats even better!),
and follow up with your true intended, more reasonable request. The
other person will be more likely to agree to the second request.
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(/)
23) Always frame a request as a

choice.
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No one likes to feel pressured into doing something they dont want to do.
By subtlety rephrasing a request, you can make the person feel like they
came to the decision on their own terms.
Homeless people who say things like, its up to you if you want to donate
or not end up making more money than those who simply ask for money.
The same is generally true for bands that offer pay what you want
payment structures for their music. They know you can easily download
their music for free off the internet, so they encourage you to pay what
you feel is right.
A slightly more aggressive technique is the assumptive close:
This is a classic sales technique that can be used in any social situation.
Instead of asking for permission, do you want to donate/go on a
date/get something to eat assume that the person already does. Of
course, you cant just force someone to do something, but a leading
question can nudge them in the right direction: Would you like to donate
5 dollars or 10 dollars?
Now instead of simply saying yes or no, they have to actively deny your
request and feel like a naysayer.
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24) If you work in a bar or in customer

service of any kind
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Put a mirror behind you at the counter. When an angry customer

approaches you, he will have to see himself in the mirror and will most
probably calm down. Nobody likes ruining his image.
25) Chew gum if you are nervous.

Evolutionarily speaking, our brains assume that if we are eating then we
arent in any immediate danger, so the fight or flight response is
weakened.
There you have it. The 25 most useful psychological life hacks that
can help you gain advantage in social situations. Use them wisely.
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This article was originally published in The Quintessential Man (http://thequintessentialman.com), and edited for HighExistence.
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The simplest hack for happiness
Want to become signicantly happier in just 5

minutes
per day? The 5-Minute Journal is
situations/)
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scientically proven
to help you do just that. About (/mission)
(http://www.highexistence.com/recommended
/ve-minute-journal-review/)
Read our review (http://www.highexistence.com/recommended/ve-minute-journal-review/)
Their website (The simplest hack for happiness)
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f9b6-4741b531-634f6efad4c2?d
id=5687&cid=11009&
adid=1325576)
A New Solution That

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Lets You Sleep
(http://www.howlifew
orks.com
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key=30wk40hne5ftr9
cntm93id4s&
c1=5687&
c2=1253362&c3=kk0)
26/07/15 13:29
at_Stops_Snoring_an
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84?ag_id=1138&
wid=6DD02408Sign In (/signin?redirect_to=/25-psychological-life-hacks-help-gain-advantage-socialA3B1-4C01-965F3ADC13BFC4F5&
did=5687&cid=1005&
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Aboutsi_id=5186&
(/mission)
ti=bjkinit&
it=2015-07-26
06:29:58&ck=ff7222a
7d9200d8accae58b7
ad9fb8ed)
(/)
by Andrian (/writer/Andrian)
(/writer/Andrian)
Andrian is the author of the best-selling book Speak Like

a Leader (http://speaklikealeaderbook.com). The most
comprehensive handbook on how to master the art of
conversation and become a great speaker.
My Website (http://thequintessentialman.com/)
15 Big
Life
Insights
I Wish I
Knew
at 18
21 of 26
My Blog Posts (/writer/Andrian)
(http://www.highexistence.com
/15-big-life-insights-i-wish-
/how-a-password-changed-
i-knew-at-18/)
my-life/)
How a
password
changed
my life.
26/07/15 13:29
(http://www.happify.com
(/)
/o/lpr
(https://www.getoptimind.com
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Become aid=highexistence)
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Stop
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Destructive
- Get
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Habits
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Your
Full Your
Free
Potential
Sample
Life Pro
Tip:
Stop
Reading
New
Books
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Friedrich
Nietzsches
Guide to
Conquering
Your
Existence
/friedrich-nietzsches-guideto-conquering-your-existence/
Have a comment?
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DCEEZY (http://www.highexistence.com/people/dustin/)
(4)
December 26, 2014
Some people lack condence. Some people are picked on and bullied. There are
some tools in this article that combat these issues. It doesnt make you a sociopath.
/25-psychologicallife-hacksI am an actor and I use body language to portray different types of characters. To
22 of 26
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(/)
Join (/join)
help-gainportray high class and high condence characters I stand very close to how #13 is
advantagedescribed minus the unnaturally big smile. Also I speak slower and my dialogue is
Sign In (/signin?redirect_to=/25-psychological-life-hacks-help-gain-advantage-socialsocial-
generally written for me to speak in complete sentences. I make eye contact and
situations/)
2
do not shift my weight. More important than the stance I take, is the ability to stand
situations/)
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About
(/mission)
rather stillDiscuss
but not(/discussions)
overly still. Often
times
after playing this type of character, I will
subconsciously continue to do this in my personal life for a time. The same is true
for the opposite type of character. To portray this type of character I avoid eye
contact and am generally rather twitchy.
For ethical reasons, I try not to be manipulative. Im not acting in my personal life,
but when Im confronted by a bully I have used similar techniques to change the
dynamic of a potentially uncomfortable and unwanted situation. I believe it is
unethical to use these types of behaviors to impose your will onto people. Above
all else, if you use any or all of these, remember who YOU are. Being yourself is the
most powerful thing you can be. Use the information in this article to be the best
YOU you can be.
sarahamor (http://www.highexistence.com/people/sarahamormino/)
(50)
November 23, 2014
This was a delightful read. Something that should denitely be shared, and through
/25-psychologicalpractice and routine, I have no doubt that it will be. Cheers!
life-hackshelp-gainadvantagesocialsituations/)
2
paulette dodson (http://www.highexistence.com/people/alexjohn/)
(0)
March 12,
2015
Agreed its absolutely great read..

/25-psychologicallife-hackshelp-gain-
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advantage-
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socialsituations/)
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situations/)
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Eric (http://www.highexistence.com/people/blankey/)
(1,779)
September 7, 2014
Awesome. Thanks!
1
jelica ()
(12)
September 3, 2014
Yea Ive decided this is sociopathic too but society is competitive. If thats the
game you like to play its easy to learn the rules. You can transcend power plays by
/25-psychologicallife-hacksmaking a servant of yourself or being audacious or arrogant.
help-gainadvantagesocialsituations/)
1
Shahin (http://www.highexistence.com/people/shahin/)
(0)
September 8, 2014
Interesting
1
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jelica ()
(12)
(/) 3, 2014
September
Join (/join)
think socializing would be better for everyone if we didnt see frame control as a
Sign
In I(/signin?redirect_to=/25-psychological-life-hacks-help-gain-advantage-socialway to manipulate others but only as a way to protect ourselves.
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1
Bryan Hellard (http://www.highexistence.com/people/xyver/)
(297)
September 5,
2014
Except if everyone was protecting themselves, how would they ever open up to
/25-psychologicalanyone? No communication is the safest bet, and the most self protective.
life-hackshelp-gainadvantagesocialsituations/)
1
jelica ()
(12)
September 3, 2014
I appreciate this article though. You have to speak the same language as others if
you want to participate and it emphasizes freedom of mind a lot.
1
phishenchips ()
(0)
September 3, 2014
Are you a sociopath? Do you see people as objects f

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25 Life Hacks

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25 Psychological Life Hacks that Will Help You Ga...

25 Psychological Life Hacks

25 Psychological Life Hacks that Will Help You Ga...

25 Psychological Life Hacks that Will Help You Ga...

1) Assume comfort in any interaction.

25 Psychological Life Hacks that Will Help You Ga...

in you and consequently even liking you.

2) Pay attention to peoples feet when

3) Whenever you have an argument

25 Psychological Life Hacks that Will Help You Ga...

with someone, stand next to them and

4) Whenever you need a favor, open

25 Psychological Life Hacks that Will Help You Ga...

In most cases, people will (/)

and we do like to be the one who is capable of helping.

5) If you want people to feel good, give

25 Psychological Life Hacks that Will Help You Ga...

6) If you want to get a positive

This one is extremely powerful and also a bit manipulative especially if

7) Want to see if someone is paying

25 Psychological Life Hacks that Will Help You Ga...

even be interested in what(/)you are saying, do this. Fold your armsJoin

8) Having trouble remembering

9) If you ask someone a question and

25 Psychological Life Hacks that Will Help You Ga...

This is a very common situation

bit of pressure on them but it communicates that you show interest. It

10) People usually focus on the

25 Psychological Life Hacks that Will Help You Ga...

this subcommunicates neediness and nervousness.

A well-placed pause can create tension that makes

your words have more gravitas.

exciting. Switch up your tone of voice from deep

READ: 8 Ways to be UBER Charismatic

25 Psychological Life Hacks that Will Help You Ga...

11) Condence is more important than

12) Fake it until you make it.

25 Psychological Life Hacks that Will Help You Ga...

13) Pose in a Power Stance.

14) If you want to be persuasive, try

15) A clean and organised environment

25 Psychological Life Hacks that Will Help You Ga...

affects your mood, productivity, and

16) Want to nd out which people are

25 Psychological Life Hacks that Will Help You Ga...

17) Whenever you call a person you

18) Want to build rapport and gain

25 Psychological Life Hacks that Will Help You Ga...

enjoys it. How do you match

19) When someone insults you, either

19) Stand up straight, have warm

25 Psychological Life Hacks that Will Help You Ga...

Keep your hands out of your

somebodys hand, you immediately become a more desirable person to

20) The Benjamin Franklin Effect.

25 Psychological Life Hacks that Will Help You Ga...

This is an unbelievable finding.

21) Dont be afraid to touch another

22) Use the door-in-the-face hack.