.

The mirror is the only place a man should look to

place blame.
We are responsible for our failures, no one else. Often, our successes are due
to a lot of hard, smart work and talent, but also a lot of help. So we can look to
others to blame for part of our success, but never for our failures.
This isnt a tearing ourself down blame. Its a responsibility blame. Its an I
know I have the power to turn things around blame. Give yourself the
respect of keeping your success and failures under your control. If YOU
work hard enough, sacrifice, and risk. YOULL see success. If you dont, you
wont.
2. Focus on a goal. Not on people or things.
If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things. Albert
Einstein
By tying our life to a goal, were always going to have a focus. Well forever be
moving forward. If we look to things and people to fill a void, well always have
a void.
Of course, relationships are arguably the most important thing we can
cultivate in life. People make life worth living. They make it enjoyable. But a
man with a goal is a leader. He has a purpose. Even if that goal is to be a
great father or husband, its a goal. A man whos always looking to things or
people for purpose is always going to be looking to things or people for a
purpose.
3. Always move forward.
I walk slowly, but I never walk backward. Abraham Lincoln
The words You will have tribulation grace the inside of my left arm. Its a fact,
so accept it. It happens to all of us, so dont act like youre the only guy in the
world going through a tough time. When it comes, dont take a single step
backward. Even if its at a snails pace, always move forward.
Thats what a man does. A boy quits. He complains and lets life push him
around. A man knows that tribulation is a part of life and that in our trials are
where we grow. Theyre where we prove to ourselves that were
strong. Always move forward, no matter the tragedy, setback, or loss.
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4. Behind every great man is a great woman.
How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on
treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being. Oscar Wilde
I look at my Mom and Dad for this example. My Dads a great man. My Moms
a great woman. If my Dad needs to man up, my Mom will tell him. We wont
always recognize when its time for us to man up. If we dont have a great lady
behind us, telling us, its time to man-up, to take charge, we often wont.
Find a great woman. Make sure shes strong enough to call you out when you
need it. Because you will need it. And abide by the two quotes in this point.
Make her happy by not treating her like a perfectly normal human being. Treat
her like a princess.
And girls? Youre too young for them now, but when the time comes, treat
them like princesses because thats what they are. John Q
5. Build a strong body.
Men are protectors. Most often this means emotional as well as financial
support (the latter often not as important as the former, especially in todays
households), but physical support is a must as well. We need to be able to
PHYSICALLY protect our family and friends.
The best reason for a man to workout isnt for confidence (although
thats HUGE), its for those what if moments. What if you have to come
to the rescue of a loved one or even a stranger and youre not in the
physical condition to successfully save them? Youll lose them.
Now do you see the importance of being in great shape? Of being strong and
athletic? Take action on this one (click here). Dont belittle its significant
importance. You may one day need to physically man-up and take control of a
dicy situation. Be prepared.
6. Dont be a rat.
When a man points a finger at someone else, he should remember that four
of his fingers are pointing at himself. Louis Nizer
Much like a man doesnt look elsewhere to place blame for his own faults, he
also doesnt jump at the chance to tell on another. This is going to be a hotly
contested point, but how are you going to man-up if youre always telling one
friend what another said about them? If youre always spreading rumors?
A man doesnt gossip. He doesnt sing when hes cornered. His word is his
bond. Its time more of us realize this.
7. Surround yourself with the right people.

In Vegas with a group of friends. Each of them doing big things.
You are an accumulation of the 5 people you hang around with
most. Think about these 5 people. Are they ambitious? Do they complain? Do
they gossip? Are they lazy?
Sometimes we cant choose who we grow up with, but we can choose who we
spend our time with. Start weening out the negative people in your life, and
replace them with people that inspire you.
Heres the catch, you also have to inspire them. Youre not going to have
successful friends if you, yourself, arent already well on your path to
success.
8. Never hold a grudge.
To man-up is to take responsibility. A man isnt bitter. He doesnt envy and he
doesnt hold a grudge. Let it go. Its useless to hold on to something you most
likely have no control over.
9. Have gratitude.
Be grateful for where you are. Even if youre in despair, theres something
good here. Theres a lesson to learn that is shaping the man you are
becoming and who you CAN BE. A man doesnt complain. A big part of this is
having gratitude for where he is in life, no matter where this is. But also having
gratitude for all those around him.
10. Believe in something. Stand for something.
Be sure you put your feet in the right place, then stand firm. Abraham
Lincoln
A man has values, morals, beliefs, and expectations. He stands for
something. Thats what man-ing up is. Its standing firm when youre the only
one standing. Its being a rock. You need to have a foundation if youre going
to be able to stand strong.
Young men want to be faithful, and are not; old men want to be faithless, and
cannot. Oscar Wilde
11. Be annoyingly positive.
Today is just a good day in disguise. Paul Venghaus
Things get better, eventually. They always do. Know that if you work hard,
smart, and use your talent, you will succeed. Then brings others up with you.
12. Have discipline.
Discipline is an unpopular word these days. Everyone want whats in the
present. We want to spend the money we have on fast times and
experiences. We want no responsibility. We dont want to think about the
future. But thats not life. The future comes a lot faster than we realize.
Focus on a goal, then have the discipline to see it through. Theres no greater
feeling than accomplishing something you feel is great.
13. Make big promises. Then follow through.
Dont be a talker. Be a doer. The more you cry wolf, the less people will
believe what you say. Dont make promises if you dont intend to keep them.
That being said, promise the world, then deliver it. Promise yourself that
youre going to be wildly successful (be specific), then make it happen. If
youre the kind of guy that doesnt want to lie or fail, do this. If youre the kind
of guy that loves giving others hope with words but never actions, dont do
this.
14. Fake it.
Act like you are where you want to be. Fake it until you make it. Act like a
man, even if deep down all you want to do is whine and complain, act like you
have it all under control.
The funny thing is, that by faking like we DO have it all under control, we GET
IT under control. This is a very powerful thing to do. It should be number 1 or
2 on the list.
15. Seek out and face your fears.
Each time we face our fear, we gain strength, courage, and confidence in the
doing.
Being strong takes practice. What are you afraid of? If its something physical
like getting in a fight, then join a boxing club and get in the ring. Facing this
fear will transfer over to many, many other areas, trust me.
Practice facing your fears daily. The more you practice the little ones, the
better youll be prepared for the big ones.

16. Fight.
Be a fighter. Like I just mentioned, getting in a literal, physical fight is a good
thing. Its a fear many of us never face. Take that never taking a step
backwards attitude to life.
Life, the greatest fight of them all. Fight to stay positive. Fight to be a
success. Fight to win each battle, no matter how big, small, personal, or
public. Fight.
17. Risk.
If you want something, or believe in something, risk to get it. Risk it all to get it.
If every man is attempting to be a hero, he must posses the a heros most
important characteristic: sacrifice. Sacrifice and risk go hand in hand. Have
the balls to take risks when you need to take them, for lifes sake.
18. Actively motivate.
If youre going to bring home the bacon, man-up, reach your true potential,
and always move forward, youre going to have to constantly motivate
yourself. You cant leave your success to chance. It just doesnt work like that.
Resource: The Art of Being Actively Motivated
19. Have killer instinct.
This is why I think every guy should be involved in sports and competition. At
a very young age it teaches us the value of hard work. It also teaches us how
to win.
In boxing, when you have a guy against the ropes, you dont back off. Its not
that youre an ass hole, its just that if the positions were switched, hed go for
the jugular as well. Its how sports work. And in many cases, its how life
works.
Dont be afraid to win. Dont be afraid to go for the jugular. The greatest
athletes of all time may have been nice guys, but they were (are) also killers.
Michael Jordan, Sugar Ray Robinson, Rocky Marciano, and Wayne Gretzky
were all killers. They might have been great guys out of the sports arena, but
come game time, they played for keeps.
A man doesnt tear others down to see success. Man-ing up isnt being a
prick. But a man does try to win. He does go for the kill. You owe it to
yourself, the work youve done, and your abilities to give it your all. Dont sell
yourself short. Man-up and have a killer instinct.
20. Love to compete.
Life is a competition where youre trying to be your best. More often than not,
youre competing against no one but the man in the mirror.
Competition is about doing and being your best in every area of life. Itll help
you be a better father, husband, boyfriend, and a better overall man.
21. Know your priorities.
Your #1 priority might be your girlfriend, your kids, or whatever. But
understand that in taking care of the former, you need to have your own shit
together. You need to sacrifice. You need to WORK.
Dont think of priorities like theyre a list. Think of them like a circle. If your
family is in the middle, the circle outside of it should be your work. In taking
care of your business, youre benefitting your family. Spending time with
friends is important, but if thats all we do. Were not man-ing up. Were on a
fast-track to a purposeless, unsuccessful life.
22. Work. Hard.
Things may come to those who waitbut only the things left by those who
hustle. Abraham Lincoln
A man knows the value of hard work. If were very going to be a role model
for anyone, we need to work hard. We need to lead by example. If we truly
work hard and understand its benefits, were less likely to complain, envy, or
wish we were in someone elses shoes.
23. Take charge.
Fortune favors the bold. So be bold. Have the confidence to take life by the
reigns and take charge, not only of your own situation, but take the lead in
lifes many different roles. The world needs more confident and competent
leaders. Be a leader amongst your friends, and have the balls to be one in
your own life and in your relationships.

More is lost due to inaction, than wrong action. Keep that statement close
to heart.
24. Put others first. Yourself second.
Part of man-ing up is acknowledging that our actions effect more than just
ourselves. A man understands this. A boy does not.
25. Learn to enjoy the crap.
When Lance Armstrong was going through chemotherapy he said he learned
to enjoy pain.
This is the greatest benefit, in his mind, to the cancer he went through and
survived. If he didnt learn to enjoy pain, hed pity his situation. Hed complain
and look for a way out. Hed give up. If were going to man up we have to
understand that our lows are never as bad as they appear to be, and our
highs never as great.
Conclusion
When it comes down to it, the ability to man-up is the ability to be strong when
others need you to be. When others cant be. Being strong isnt easy, but
whats the alternative? To quit? To back down? There is no alternative.
















7 Ways to Become a Better Man
July 23, 2014 By Chad Howse
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Im sitting in one of those leather cigar chairs with the dimples in the back-rest,
writing, working, brimming with the guilt that comes with time away from my mission. I spent
the last two days in the Canadian Rocky Mountains on what was one of the best golf trips Ive
had the pleasure to go on. It will become an annual trip.
The golf was incredible. The courses, immaculate. The scenery leaves you speechless as peak
after peak creep over the pines and firs and spruces that guard each fairway. It was a sight to
behold. Its experiences like this that I like to spend my money on. Rather than things, I choose
travel or sport or business and anything else that aids in the development, evolution, and
improvement of the Self. Yet, although this trip was well worth every cent, theres still a feeling
of guilt as I sit back down at the computer to work.
Ive been away from what makes me a better man without fully grasping that experiences like
those in the past couple of days should be held in that same regard. And so I work at a frantic
pace, trying to catch up with time, make up for the previous 48 hours, and keep this train a
rollin.
I want to be better, better at being a man, a better man, and simply better than I was yesterday.
Better than I thought I could be. This, however, you simply cant be. You have to train to
improve. You have to hustle to evolve.
Sitting back in the smoking chair where the work has been done during the past few weeks Im
hit with that question, Is what Im doing right now making me better?
And so I start writing an article, not just for readers of the site but as a journal entry to clarify
that how I spend my time, my energy, how I plan my day, my minutes, is in the name of reaching
the potential that exists somewhere within each of us. This article will read like a life-planner, a
day-planner, a map you can use to focus on whats important and whats best in the grand
scheme of things.
Lets make moves.
7 Ways to Become Better
1. Create an
archetype.
Your archetype is you. He has your strengths and weaknesses, your vulnerabilities. But the
strengths are compounded and the weaknesses diminished. Hes you but ten times more
disciplined, and as a result of this enhanced focus, hes better. Hes in better shape, he gets more
done, hes accomplished more and he takes greater risk.
Hes the guy you wish you could be. That guy is who you should be. He is you with all of your
potential realized.
Take out a pen and a pad and start writing.
Lets start with the physical as its easily measured. Identify your weight, body fat percentage,
strength, athleticism (vertical leap). Then go to the more abstract aspects of who he is (who you
are).
When he gets up in the morning he hits the ground running with an hour of silence time. His
focus doesnt waver. He does what makes him better. In planning hes able to take the risks
necessary to live a great life, and he does it without a whole lot of contemplation, he simply goes
with his gut.
Socially hes fun. He jokes around. Hes confident in every circumstance. Hes the lion in the
room, but not in an overtly dominant sense, but simply a sense that he controls the room either
through conversation or contemplative silence (who you are will determine this). Hes an
adventurer in the truest sense, always moving toward his fears, never running from them.
His risks dont always bare fruit. Hes lost. Hes been relegated to the depths, but his faith is too
strong to break. Hes unbreakable, unrelenting, unwavering in his values and in who he is. Hes
imperfect, but he knows where hes going and hes getting there. Hes the guy that others want
by their side in a fight, both literally and metaphorically. Hes the guy people depend on and
hes glad to bare this burden.
Hes a warrior. Strong, athletic, proud, and confident. Hes self-aware, he knows his weaknesses
and hes making them his strengths. He does what others arent willing to do and he does what
he must to be at his best.
2. Identify your values.
If you dont know your values you cant possibly determine your archetype and identify who you
want to be in 10 years. Without values a man has no spine, nothing to lean on when the shit hits
the fan.
What are your values?
I value discipline and courage. Both go hand-in-hand. Discipline is incredibly important to me.
Without it nothing of value can be accomplished and that includes potential. Without discipline
you cant become better. Without courage you cant be your best. Without the courage to risk it
all theres a ceiling to who you can be and what you can accomplish.
I value honor. No road to success is of value if its not accomplished with honor. Its better to
fail with honor than it is to make a billion dollars without it. Every one of your values will be
enacted with honor or not enacted at all.
I value persistence and faith. Without these values a man is weak, he can be defeated. With them
theres no one that can beat him, no task too great, no mission too audacious.
Figure out your values and live by them unflinchingly.
Heres a great quote from Lincoln. You need faith in who you are and where youre going. You
need a firm course set, with strides taken daily in that purposeful direction
And having thus chosen our course, without guile, and with pure purpose, let us renew our trust
in God, and go forward without fear, and with manly hearts. ~ Abraham Lincoln
3. Find measurable characteristics and
goals.
Discipline is measurable as is every physical goal weve laid out. Find others that you can
measure, tasks and goals that will make you better.
Track your time spent on the stuff you should be focusing on vs time spent on waste and
distraction. Track this time daily and have a weekly report. The point of the report isnt to make
you feel like crap but to give you something to measure against and improve upon.
Thats tracking your discipline. Track your risk as well.
Whenever youre faced with a decision, write out the biggest, grandest play, as well as the safest
play, see which you choose most often. Keep a journal and log every time youre faced with a
fear. Have a point for a fear faced with action and a negative point for a fear fleed. It brings your
battle between weakness and courage to a measurable medium, something you can build upon
and face more consciously.
4. Create a timeline, a plan.
Now its time to put this archetype, this better you, into plan form and all plans are determined
by action. What audacious actions will this guy take in other words, what are your most daring
goals and when will you accomplish them by?
Bring it into a 5 year plan, then break it down from there. Do something like this:
5 year audacious goal
1 year increment (1/5 of your 5 year goal, this isnt what you will do to make the 5 year goal real,
but a measurement of it)
a. Quarterly measurement of the 1 year increment.
b. Quarterly task that must be accomplished to reach the one year measurement (a mini, goal).
Things that must be accomplished by the end of the month.
A weekly list of things that have to be accomplished in the name of your greater goal.
Most important: what you do on a daily basis to be at your best and accomplish what you want
to accomplish. This is your routine, and its the most important thing in your life.
5. Map out a schedule.
About that you routine. Structure your day in blocks. You can fill them out with the necessary
focuses later, keep in mind that you want to give your best time to the most important tasks,
those things that will yield the greatest return.
Take mine as an example
5am-530am quiet time, reading time
530am-10am writing time
10am-12pm lifting, training, eating
12pm-430pm writing part two
430pm-6pm active break plus eating
6pm-9pm implementation, emails, plan for the next day
6. Budget your money.
Money is important, dont think that it is. For one, its a measurement of how well you do your
job (one of many measuring sticks). Second, it can be freedom if you choose to use it wisely
instead of making it your god. Third, you can help a lot of people if you have a lot of money
best example is Bill Gates charity, its doing more than any other charity and its largely funded
by a single human.
Use your money to help you become better, dont allow it to be a point of worry, fear, or envy.
First focus: Self-improvement and business.
Spend money on books and business and anything else that falls into this category first.
Determine how much you want to allot. Spend on this first. The better you are, the better off the
rest of us are. This includes travel, for me. A part of my self-improvement is contingent on going
to new places that ignite a curiosity and fear that I have to face. Dont rationalize this point, but
understand what makes you better and include it in this. For me, business and books come first.
Tithe: Give money back.
Budget a certain amount of money each month to aiding others, be it through a good charity or
some other organization. 10% is always a good mark to aim for.
Everything else: Budget your goodies.
Spend as little as possible on things, even booze and cigars, nights out, movies, eating out.
Determine how little you can spend to still have a good time, then stick to that budget.
Within this is food and health. Determine how much you need to be at your best from a health
standpoint as well. I spend relatively freely in this area of my life but limit the goodies, the
things, and the stuff that acts like a momentary boost, always losing its luster with time.
The goal: Make more money because its a measurement for success, but dont aim purely for
money, aim to be better at what you do and the money will come, and when it comes, dont
allow it to make you unhappy like it does for most as they begin to tie their worth to the dollar
bills and the things they buy with the dollar bills. Theres no value in money. Theres value in
who you are. Money can be used for good or corruption or fear or however you choose to use it.
It is, however, always your choice, so dont ever think that money has control over you. Use it to
further aid you in this quest to reach your potential.
7. Ask yourself, does this make me
better?
Go over everything in your life, how you spend your time, how spend your money, who you
hang out with, and determine if it makes you better or worse.
You are the 5 people you hang out with most, so choose them wisely. You are what you eat, so
eat healthily. What you want is what you give your time to, so make sure youre giving your time
to those things that make you better. What you give your time to is a reflection of your priorities.
Is your priority to watch TV or read? Is your priority to be healthier or fatter? Is your priority
self-improvement or ease (they dont go hand in hand)?
Being better is something we should all aim to be. Our potential is what were put here to
accomplish. Our capacity is what we need to find. Our capacity to work, our capacity to give, to
live, to experience the thrills that this life has to offer.
The recipe is simple: Do more things that make you a better person, that make you a better man,
that make you better at being a man, and that bring you closer to that archetype, that legend that
you want to become down the road. No go forward, create your plan, and hustle!