Adult, Consensual Spanking:

Enjoying our Interest & Answering Your Questions

by Jack

copyright 1996 by Jack and ABCD Webmasters

Update

(Posted with the author's permission)

This paper is on the consensual use of spanking as discipline

in an adult relationship. For simplicity sake and because of
the origin of this essay, it is written with the female in the
relationship receiving the discipline. It is written with the
full knowledge that in many relationships the woman is the
one who dispenses the discipline or that either partner could
be the recipient of such correction.

Consent and adult are the two key words. It is not - in any
way - about the use of corporal punishment in the more
common manner. Nor is this paper about physical abuse of
any type. The writers of this essay abhor any type of abuse
or use of corporal punishment that is not between
consensual adults.

This essay was written after many women expressed

frustration in trying to express their interest in "domestic
discipline." Individual needs, interests and experiences vary.
There is no "right" or "wrong" way to explore this interest
as long as it is between consensual adults. There are,
however, some common themes, opportunities and appeal
for such interest. This article explores those issues.

Introduction:

As technology allows us to explore various interests in a

confidential manner and as women are treated more as
equals (finally) than at any other times in humankind, we
are learning that many women strive for a loving
relationship that includes a partner who will set limits and
enforce those limits with the use of spanking and similar
'punishments.'

As strange as it might sound to some, many very normal

women want to turn over just a little bit of control to
someone they would trust enough to predetermine
boundaries. These women wanted to be required to live
within those boundaries with the knowledge that violations
of those pre-set limits would result in a very sore behind.

Many of these women remember these feelings as teens or

even before they entered into adolescence. Many read as
many autobiographies and novels as possible hoping for a
spanking scene. Frequently these young ladies looked up the
word "spanking" in dictionaries or did computer searches
(at least the younger ones) on spanking, corporal
punishment and similar activities. Oftentimes viewing
movies like McLintock, featuring two spanking scenes, or
Blue Hawaii, where Elvis Presley gives a delicious over-the-
knee spanking, would be their first indication that others
also enjoyed such fantasies. Repeated viewing of such
movies, even to this day, provides special enjoyment.

It is perplexing, however, to want a man to take control, to

dish out some "good ol'fashioned discipline," to be viewed as
someone who is not an equal even if it is for a short period of
time or within defined (often negotiated) limits. What kind
of a lady would want to have the clock moved back to when
they were not on equal footing with their mate, male friend
or Significant Other?

Why do so many confident, intelligent women want such

treatment? What is so appealing to such juvenile treatment?
Why would a grown woman want to be put in such a
position (literally) that is embarrassing? What is it in
spanking that makes some women want to accept something
that is clearly unpleasant, humbling and, yes, stinging?
Finally, what can a woman who has such interest do to fulfill
this secret part of her life? How does - or can - it all work?

This paper explores these questions and provides some ideas

to couples that want to explore a disciplinary arrangement
by mutual respect. Trust, respect, limits, honesty and
feelings all play critical roles in such a relationship. It is not
an arrangement to allow a man to be a brute, to stomp out
the rights of women or to humiliate or "put down" a
woman. Nothing could be further from the truth.

Why me?

Are you one of the many women who have long wanted a
relationship with a man who cares enough to set limits, to set
them down in a sensitive manner and to enforce them by the
use of corporal punishment usually in the manner of an
over-the-knee, bare bottom spanking? Does the use of the
word "spank" alone start to give you "funny" feelings? Do
you like to act like a brat and long for someone to "put you
in your place"? Do words like "brat," "naughty,"
"misbehave," and "spanking," all send all kinds of thoughts
to be generated? If so, you are not alone.
Increasingly women are realizing that many other women
share this most secret feeling. Look in the back of
Cosmopolitan some time and you will see one, two, possibly
three ads for people interested in "over-the-knee" discipline;
the ads offer stories and videos dedicated to "over-the-knee
erotica." Other mainstream publications also include such
advertisements including Romantic Times. They are in these
publications because they cater to middleclass women who
often have such a private interest.

There are many "spanking publications." Many of these

specialty publications are owned and operated by women.
People can order the publications from the safety of their
homes and receive their products in discrete packaging.
They go out of their way to reach out to women who would
not otherwise have access to such publications.

Many women spend years wondering Why? Why do they

have the interest? Is there something in their childhood that
would make the interest a focal point for so many thoughts
and fantasies? Were they born this way? Some women
interested in such domestic discipline were spanked as
children or teens. But it seems that most with the interest
were rarely if ever spanked. Other women suffered abuse as
youngsters. One recently recounted that maybe the reason
she had the interest is because unlike the abuse she suffered
as a child, this type of 'adult, consensual discipline' showed
there were limits to such physical correction and that it was
done with love and only in a trusting relationship.

There is a void in meaningful research on the origin of such

a fascination. It could be that something, even at a young age
triggers such an interest. Possibly the desire to receive set
punishment is more prevalent in certain households or
cultures; for example, possibly settings that use considerable
guilt to guide behavior would result more people to have a
appetite for defined, clear-cut signs of disapproval. And
maybe, just maybe the appeal for spanking is hereditary.
Because of the nature of the interest, one's children would be
the last to know.

Yes, we all come to this interest with different backgrounds

and memories. Maybe it was a spanking that we witnessed
or school paddlings that triggered our interest. Many
women, however, swear that they never saw a spanking,
don't even know for sure how such an event takes place
except for the little glimpse of such activities in an old I Love
Lucy episode or John Wayne movie.

Whatever the origin, we have to confront such feelings. We

must decide what we do with our secret fascination. Are we
willing to live with living out our interest on Lucy Ricardo’s
set? Can we simply fantasize about such a relationship? Will
the consumption of adult, consensual books and magazines
be sufficient? Is discussion and possible "play" in computer
chat rooms be enough for us? Or do we do something about
it and make it part of our lives? It is a personal question and
one that many people have and continue to wrestle with as
they determine what they are most comfortable with for
their own lives.

Setting limits:

Disciplinary spankings in an adult, consensual relationship

is about setting limits. While it might look like the
"disciplinarian" decides how much and how often to spank,
the "spankee" actually has the real control of the situation.
The one who is receiving the discipline determines in
advance the limits of her interest. This can include the
severity of the spanking, the instruments that can be used,
the degree of undress, associated punishments (like "corner
time") and even the frequency of such discipline. Of course
this is usually set in ways that are removed from the actual
application of the discipline, allowing the "spanker" to
determine such issues within the framework worked out in
advance. This gives the young lady the feeling that she has
no control over in accepting such discipline. In reality
nothing could be further from the truth.

Many couples also use a "safe word" or "caution word"

during the "punishment session." This technique allows the
one receiving the punishment to halt (the safe word) or slow
down (the caution word or phrase) the session by saying a
word or sentence. It might be a word that has no association
with discipline (such as the words iron or red) or it might be
a phrase that would fit in well with an over-the-knee
experience such as "I've learned my lesson." Whatever the
word or phrase, it should be determined in advance and the
spanker always follows responds to its use without any
question.

What Interests the Women?

Just as women are drawn to the interest in different ways,

the principle interest in spanking differs, too. There are
many reasons why a woman may want this type of juvenile
discipline. While many women enjoy the sensation of the
spanking itself and the intimacy of being over-the-knee, most
seek spankings for the emotional connection much more
than the physical aspect of the activity.

The limited studies performed on the subject suggest that

many people who engage in such activities like the escape
from self, being able to get away from day-to-day activities
and worries when the individuals engaged in such activities.
This goes hand-in-hand (or is that hand to bottom?) with the
ability to give up control for a certain period of time.
Women increasingly have additional pressures upon them,
requiring them to make decisions in their personal and
professional life. Even stay-at-home moms have to exercise
considerable control and judgment all day, giving approval
and granting permission over the lives of others. It often
feels good to have no control for a certain period of time.

Paramount for many women who seek spankings is the

appeal in having someone else set limits then enforce those
limits in a very direct manner. For these women such action
shows true friendship. When a man threatens or follows
through with a spanking when she violates rules, it shows a
level of concern that cannot be demonstrated in any other
way.

Sure, it is humbling to be placed in such juvenile

punishment. No doubt it is embarrassing to have one's
bottom bared to receive the spanking. Often one's reaction
to such punishment can be humiliating - the sounds that are
made, the kicking of one's feet, the begging and pleading
that often takes place. All of this is a essential element of a
good spanking for many women. Some don't even like it at
the time, but enjoy it in retrospect. It builds respect and
trust one has with their partner - even when that person is
only a "spanking friend."

Perhaps most important of anything that interests a woman

who needs to be spanked is the anticipation before the event.
It is the building excitement, the possibilities, the concern
about the sting of the hand, paddle, strap or whatever. It is
knowing that there is someone who cares enough to call her
on her attitude or behavior.

Finally for these women, there is the emotional release after

a good spanking. Many woman talk about how the need
builds like air in a balloon. Her behavior gets increasing
worse as she seeks the attention she so much desires. She
might even feel out of control by the time the opportunity for
her discipline takes place. She then shifts gears and wishes
she didn't behave in such a naughty manner, dreading the
consequence of her behavior. She starts to focus on the old
fashioned discipline she will be receiving, possibly thinking
of how her punishment is going to sting or the
embarrassment she will feel because of the ordeal. Finally it
is over. She received her attention. She felt the repercussions
of her behavior. She feels that a burden has been lifted off
her shoulders (or is that a bit lower?).

What Interests the Men?

As one who always had (since five or six at least) an interest

in spanking, the attraction to the activity seems obvious. One
might instead ask: What is not appealing to adult,
consensual spanking? For a "spanker" the idea of spanking
fills all the sensations - and especially the brain. One sees the
woman's bottom reacting to the touching and slapping
during the spanking. The sounds of the strokes are pleasing
to the ear, as is the verbal reaction from the woman while
being spanked. The fascination of a lady's soft tush is
replaced only by the allure of the warmth radiating from a
freshly spanked behind. She smells sweet and feminine. But
the physical aspect of the spanking is only one dimension of
the interest.

Long before the 'young lady' takes a trip over one's lap, the
seductiveness of the spanking begins. It has much more to do
with the brain than the bottom. The physical play that takes
place as mentally positioning a willing lady for a spanking is
even more powerful than the physical play that must later
take place her in position.

It is those words, those luscious words - those 'spanking'

words. A perceptive spanker can detect the reaction from
the use of these words when used properly to send a
'naughty young lady' into the right mind frame for a
spanking. She fidgets. She takes a breath. She giggles. She
might even lick her lips as if tasting an appetizer before the
full course. One knows that you are causing true physical
reactions from the mere use of language - powerful speech.

The intimacy of the entire event (and if done properly, it is

usually an event) is the most charming element of adult,
consensual spanking - at least for this spanker. No, it doesn't
have to be the intimacy within a sexual relationship. It can
be the closeness of a good friendship, knowing one is giving
someone something very special, something that can only be
successfully accomplished between when there is a true
trusting relationship present.

For many of us, however, it goes beyond a spanking, an

action, a distinct event. It is the institutionally of spanking. It
is knowing that the behavior is centuries old. The knowledge
that not long ago spanking was an accepted practice with
little question plays a part of this interest for many, even
though many - if not most - of those interested in spanking
do not support the use of spanking of those under the legal
age. It is ironic that many who enjoy adult consensual
spanking find stories from other adults of their earlier
spankings fascinating, yet find current stories of youthful
spankings offensive.

It is the change in the behavior that is most precious of the

entire episode. The application of corporal correction truly
changes a young lady's attitude and behavior. Suddenly she
has respect that she lacked for the rest of her life. She
abruptly changes her attitude from one of being bratty to
one of true respect. She knows that the spanking is being
given for her own good. She wants such attention, although
often wishes it was over before it all begins. Afterwards she
is grateful for having someone care enough to punish her.
Her behavior changes not just because she has a red and
tender behind. She truly is sorry for her misdeeds and is
pleased that she had to pay the price for her malfeasance.
She understands that the use of spanking is strong way to
display displeasure. Once it is applied, however, all is
forgiven.

Knowing that spanking is an age-old practice plays into the

ritual aspect of the interest. As stated above, it is an event
and as such there are many elements that can be enjoyed
along the way. The 'sentencing' of the offender, the possible
requirement of 'fetching' the instrument of correction, the
scolding, the position required for infliction of the
correction, the baring of the behind and the aftermath
(possibly including corner time) is all part of the interest to
spanking for many men who enjoy adult, consensual
spanking.

Where do we go from here?

There are many possible courses of action for those who

have an interest in spanking. First, we should review our
options. We need to understand the wide range of options
open to us before we move forward with any course of
action. No one can tell anyone which option is best for him
or her. It is a personal decision - one that can only be made
based on particular circumstances.

Reading and Enjoying

This is an option that is most comforting to many women

with this interest. Reading "over-the-knee erotica" about
relationships where spanking plays a significant role is a way
to live in a vicarious manner through the writer of such
fiction. The selection of spanking stories is as varied as those
with the interest.

Most of the stories do not include explicit sex in them. For

many people, the interest is not directly sexual. It cuts
beyond a sexual desire. Many of the stories are more on the
order of romance novels than anything else. Much of the
fiction available on adult, consensual spanking deals with as
much about relationships and the anticipation prior to a
good spanking as the actual spanking itself. Some of the
stories even explore the feelings one might have while
preparing to receive her punishment, the thoughts going
through her head while receiving a dose of corporal
correction and the aftermath of a good over-the-knee
experience.

Other stories, however, are very sexual in nature. It is

important to know when one is buying before sending the
check. Usually the owners of these companies will assist, if
asked. Most of these companies are small, owned by people
who are more wanted to share their interest in sharing more
than making money.

A full list of sources is included at the end of this essay.

Normally these stories are well written in a very classy
manner.

Videos

Other people are much more visual oriented. The good news
is that many of the same sources that provide the written
word on adult, consensual spanking, also produce quality
"spanking videos." There is something for everyone's taste,
but most of these videos are more PG rated than anything
else. Some are more R rated, but few are more explicit.

Almost any scenario one could picture is offered in a video:

husband-wife, wife-husband, boss-secretary, next door
neighbor, sorority initiation, female-female and even some
that include outside spanking. If the video is from a true
spanking provider, the spankings that are included in the
video - and there is usually more than one spanking in a 30-
60 minute video - are real. The intensity of these spankings
vary considerably. Many include instruments - the back of a
hairbrush, wooden paddles and leather straps a favorites -
can be used in the videos.

Computer 'Chat Rooms'

Books, magazines, stories and videos are all one-way

communications. They provide a safe, confidential way to
enjoy a special interest, but don't permit an exchange of
ideas, thoughts or dialogue. Today's technology allows
people to enjoy this interest while still maintaining their
confidentiality.

There are specific areas on most major on-line computer

services that are dedicated for people with an interest in
adult, consentual spanking. Often these are little more than
a headline room (Those with the interest on America-On-
Line used to have a room called HotSeat every Wednesday
night for spanking enthusiasts) to allow people with the same
interest to congregate and talk to one another in "private
messages."

Women with this interest may find themselves very busy

receiving many personal messages from men who share the
other half of the interest. Many women find it helpful to
place a notation in their "profile" or as part of their "screen
name" to indicate they are busy at the time so they can get
the lay of the land before being deluged with private chat
opportunities.

Caution should be exercised on the computer. Sometimes

young people who are looking for more sexual related
activities come to the spanking area as they look around on
the computer and are looking for much more than just
spanking. Juveniles - or people claiming to be juveniles -
come into the spanking areas.

Meeting Others

The ultimate in living out one's interest is either meeting

someone who shares the interest or helping to convert your
mate to including spanking in your life. Both are
possibilities. We will explore both ways of including actual
spanking in your life below.

Many non-spankers have learned to love including spanking

in their relationship. Maybe it is knowing that their mate is
so happy because they are living something they have longed
for throughout their entire life. Maybe it is part of the give
and take in any good marriage or other relationship.
Sometimes it is just that a husband learns how much fun it is
to see the consequence of the application of a palm to a
willing bottom of a "brat."

Perhaps the most difficult action in trying to include

spanking in a current relationship is raising the subject with
your Significant Other. Many women have labored over this
dilemma for years only to discover that the mate either had
at least a passing interest or is at least receptive to the idea.
Often it turns out to be much easier than one would expect.
How the topic is divulged depends on one's personal
relationship and the personalities that are involved. It might
be as easy as bratting it up and hoping for some old
fashioned justice. That, however, often doesn't work.
Husbands are no better at ESP than their wives. One might
raise it during an intimate encounter, suggesting a slap to
one's bottom and letting it go from there. Again there are
drawbacks to this approach, especially for those women who
seek disciplinary spankings.

If contact is made with others with the interest is made over

the computer, possibly a direct and honest approach might
be to let one's husband see that others share the interest or
share a story or material on the interest with him. Letting
him read this essay might be a good way to start.

The most important matter to communicate is about your

interest. Try to keep it light and give him a chance to ask
questions and learn more about your interest before you
necessarily hope he will give a disciplinary spanking.
Husbands or other Significant Others are often concerned
about hurting their wife, embarrassing them or doing
something that would be viewed as socially unacceptable.
But if one's mate understands this is something that is
desired, attitudes will often shift and possibilities open up.

Make sure that your mate understands that it is about more

than the application of a firm hand to a willing bottom.
Many men are more physically than emotionally oriented.
Men who do not naturally share the interest are much more
likely to understand the physical part of the ritual better
than the psychological aspect. Explaining how words, voice,
body language and building anticipation may affect you can
all help in achieving the desired outcome.

Some wives have said that this transformation takes months,

even years before the desired feelings can be realized. Be
patient. It is not going to be like one's fantasies or the stories.
Expecting real tears is probably too much to hope for the
first time the first time a spouse gives a disciplinary
spanking. But the more one discussing her interest and
shares, the better chance that one will live out a long-term
fantasy.

Sometimes 'converting a mate' is not possible. Some women

cannot see their husband as a disciplinarian regardless of
how good of a relationship they otherwise have with their
partner. Others have expressed that their husbands have a
background of domestic violence or a bad temper and a
good level of trust needed to include spanking in their
relationship does not exist. And, still others just cannot bring
themselves to tell their husbands about their need because
they don't want to risk an otherwise good marriage.

Many women who are married and cannot bring their

husbands into their need for spanking are content to live
through others (stories, videos and on-line experiences) to
partially fulfill their desire. They know that such experiences
are not as good as the real thing, but don't want or can't
take the next step. Others want to explore through words
and learn more about their interest before they take the next
big step. But still others want to meet people. The advice
below might help these women out.

Classified in 'spanking publications' are a good way to meet

others. Most of the magazines for those with the interest
include classifies. Women, especially, have a good selection
of men who would love to do the honors. Shadowlane, one of
the largest companies, offers the larges collection of ads
from spankers and spankees. Their publication, Scene One,
offers hundreds of ads from people looking for anything
from a corresponding relationship to face-to-face meetings
(or is that face-to-bottom). Most of the ads provide a good
idea of what people seek and all the ads are from people who
want one thing: spanking.

Some of the ads have telephone numbers. This is especially

nice because an interested party may call someone and speed
up the process of getting to know someone and possibly
meeting them. It also allows a higher degree of
confidentiality for the respondent. It might be good to dial
*67 before making the phone call to make sure that the
person cannot track down your number. Safety should
always be the top priority when first making contact.

Those who might respond to personal ads should seriously

consider opening a post office box. This provides a higher
level of security. Those who advertised are almost always
just safe, sane people who share the interest. But, they still
are people who you don't know and safety precautions
should be taken.

Take your time getting to know someone. Many women

really enjoy the apprehension and nothing beats the
intensity of getting to know someone, with the full
realization that person might be the one to give you your
first over-the-knee experience. There are many men
throughout the country who want to have the opportunity,
so a woman should be selective and make sure that it is a
good fit.

That being said, it should also be mentioned that those who

share the interest are as varied as those who share any other
interest. There are few 'perfect' spankers. Like the rest of
the population, many are overweight, shy, quiet, outspoken
or even unsure of themselves. Spankers vary as much as any
other population. Make sure that not too many limits are
placed on someone or no one will make you happy.
Respecting limits and sharing one's core interest are
probably the two most important elements to look for when
deciding to meet someone for the first time.

Some people have also met over the computer. Either people
decide that they will meet after talking for some time on the
computer or some people have advertised on the computer
through on-line services or with ads on the net. Again,
precaution is the key word. Make sure that the person
shares the interest in spanking and not just looking for
companionship and ended up in the spanking area. Enjoy
on-line discussion and correspondence. People can find it
exciting to meet others this way so enjoy the apprehension
and building friendship.

Living with disciplinary spankings:

One woman, whose husband spanks her for discipline,

recently said she would never do without being in a
relationship where spanking was used when her attitude or
behavior called for it. However, unlike some, she said she
didn't like the spanking at the time she was receiving it. Still,
the spanking provided limits, sent a clear message that her
husband loved her and let her know that she had to pay for
the consequences of her behavior.

Whether a woman appreciates the spanking at the time or

time is needed for her to appreciate the application of
justice, there are many women - and men - who value living
in a loving relationship that includes disciplinary spankings.

How does such a relationship work? How hard are the

spankings? Who decides when such prescriptions are
needed? How does the actual spanking take place?

All of these questions must be answered on a personal basis,

based on the desires of each participant. Constant
communications, discussion, exploring and trailing often
helps couples determine what role discipline will play in that
particular relationship.

For the most part, the limits of such discipline are

determined in advance then it is up to the spanker to
determine how to dispense such discipline within those
limits. For example, if it is predetermined that bratty or
mouthy behavior can warrant a dose of discipline, the
'young lady' has no say so when she violates this rule. A wife
in that situation - having previously agreed to the use of
corporal correction - must accept the discipline at that point.

Does she 'want' to be spanked at that point? No, often no.

But, it is known that consent had been given in advance and
that the consequence of a stinging bottom and possible other
juvenile punishment must move forward or the discipline
will not take the next time. Sure, at that point the 'young
lady' may despise the thought of receiving an embarrassing
spanking. She may wish that anything else in the world was
going to happen, but it must take place. The spanker knows
that as much as his loved one may not like to accept her
'medicine' at the time, deep down she knows she needs such
limits placed upon her. He knows that after the discipline is
dispensed with, she is forgiven and all is (nearly) forgotten,

The details of the actual spanking is probably the most

personal nature of the entire process. Over-the-knee is, by
far, the most used position for this discipline. Even couples
who deploy other positions (such as across the end of a
couch, over the end of the bed, leaning over a hardback
chair, bending over grasping one's ankles or touching one's
knees) use the classic over-the-knee position at least
sometimes.

Most couples also use hand spanking, too. If for no other

reason than a warm up or for more mild correction, hand
spankings are fairly common. Some couples never use
anything beyond the palm. It is intimate, time-honored, and
always available. Other couples use instruments for some or
all correction. It runs the entire gambit from household
instruments like the back of a wooden hairbrush to a
wooden spoon to a fly swatter.

Special instruments exclusively for correction are also used

by many couples. This includes both wooden and leather
paddles, leather or rubber straps, tawse (a piece of leather
that is split at the end), and an English cane. Often just a
glance at the punishment instrument is enough to get a
'young lady' in line.

How the spanking takes place depends again on the couple.

Some couples use swift, over-the-knee justice. The young
lady is over the lap before she even knows what has hit her.
Her pants goes down or her dress or skirt is lifted up and
her underpants are lowered. She then feels the sting of a
determined palm or instrument until the spanker is pleased
with the results of the applied justice.

Most couples however, seem to employ a more eventful

chastisement. There is the 'sentencing' of the punishment.
This might be a simple look or a quick phrase, sometimes
said or done in front of others who don't even understand
the significance of such a gaze or word. It is the point when
the lady understands that she is 'going to get it' - that
punishment is nearly or positively unavoidable. At this point
she starts to think about why she got into this trouble, think
about her behavior, how embarrassing it is going to be to
accept her juvenile justice, how stinging her body is going to
be in a short period of time.

Apprehension is important for most women who thrive for

this type of relationship. The longer the wait, the more
intense the spanking itself will be when it is later employed.
She might talk to a friend about what trouble she is in and
how she will be punished later. She might be thinking of how
to talk her way out of such discipline. She might even pout,
but usually will bring a halt to this behavior if she
understands it will lead to more severe discipline.

Finally the time comes for the punishment to be executed.

Oh, it seemed like forever and now it is just too close to the
impending discipline. Even if she was left waiting all day and
hated it, she now wishes she had another day, a weekend, a
week, a lifetime before she is subjected to the spanking.

It might again be a simple look to signal that 'punishment

time' has arrived. He might merely direct his wife to 'fetch'
the paddle, strap or other instrument. Or it might begin with
a blistering scolding of her behavior and how she will be
punished.

Standing with her arms to her side or over her head while
getting scolded might start the actual punishment. 'Corner
time,' quiet contemplation while she stands in the corner
thinking about the spanking that will take place might be
used before the spanking. Other couples have more
innovative ways to start the spanking.

The spanking then takes place. Special care is often used to

uncover her bottom and place her in position for her to
accept her punishment. Some spankers may even require the
offender to keep her toes on the floor while over the lap or
such other restrictive actions.

The aftermath of a spanking, paddling or strapping also

depends on the particular needs of the couple. Many women
want a few minutes of the lap being comforted before corner
time or moving on with life. Others want a consoling hug
and kind word, possibly about how well she took her
spanking.
How Do we Start?

You have recently learned that many others share your

secret interest, feel comfort that you are not alone, possibly
talked to people on-line or over the phone, but you don't
know where to go from here. It's now time to think about
your goals, what you want in life and in this aspect of your
life and decide if you should take limited risks to move
forward or if you are - at least currently - willing to just
leave it to non-meeting interaction.

There is an entire community of people who share your

interest. They are professors and blue collars, suburbanites
and country dwellers, rich and middle class. They may
attend the same church you do or even be the reverend of
your church. There is no need to keep this interest entirely
to yourself Learning, exploring, exchanging and even the
possible meeting with others is only a phone call away.

The End
_________________________________________

Update note in February 2010: Jack's site is no longer extant, but

you may view the complete set of archived articles by clicking from
the dates on this page:

http://web.archive.org/web/*/http://www ... -jack.com/